#also it has motherfucking Snoop Dogg so what's not to love?

[saucy-mesothelioma]

October 31st: Meso's Honorable Mentions | Bones

Bones was released in 2001 and was directed by Ernest Dickerson. In 1979, Billy Bones (played by Snoop Dogg), a beloved and respected gangster, was betrayed and killed by a corrupt cop named Lupovich (Michael T. Weiss). Now, twenty-two years later, teenagers Patrick (Khalil Kain), Bill (Merwin Mondesir), Tia (Katharine Isabelle), and Maurice (Sean Amsing) decide to turn the building Bones once owned into a night club despite warnings from Bones's former lover Pearl (Pam Grier). Their renovations, however, soon lead to the awakening of the spirit of Billy Bones, and he won't let anybody stand in his way of enacting vengeance on those who had betrayed him.

Ernest Dickerson wanted to shoot Bones like the Blaxploitation films of the 70s, such as Blacula, Abby, Blackenstein, and Sugar Hill, and Dickerson himself stated that New Line Cinema didn't know how to properly promote the film without turning to stereotypes or without marketing it as a "Black movie". Once again as a white person, I am not in the least qualified to talk about the varying effects of Blaxploitation as well as the social commentary on the effects of drugs on African American communities that this movie covers, so I highly recommend checking out the documentary Horror Noire: A History of Black Horror directed by Xavier Burgin, which I mentioned before when I covered Candyman. It gives a wonderful history of black filmmaking and representation in the horror genre, and Ernest Dickerson actually did an interview for it. From a filmmaking perspective, Bones has some wonderful cinematography and a captivating story as it mixes elements of classic Universal Monster movies, early German Expressionist cinema, and 70s Italian horror films. Dickerson also set a big priority on using practical effects whenever he could, and this absolutely pays off with having some of the most unsettling practical effects, especially for such a lesser-known film.

It can be watched for free on Tubi

Content Warnings for the Film (may contain spoilers): violence, blood, a shit ton of maggots, dog attack (it's a demon-dog), blood, forced drug use, use of the N-word by a white character, corpses

And since Dickerson made a point to use practical effects as much as possible, you know I'm gonna give it some attention because fuck is it good.

Probably the coolest effect in this entire movie is when Bill is laying in bed listening to music, and the wall behind him suddenly reveals a writhing mass of spirits from the City of the Dead. It was accomplished by special effects artists Ariel Shaw and Tony Gardner by building a 2-story frame chock full of sculpted animatronics, puppets on rods, and empty spaces for the human actors (many of them mimes). The actors were airbrushed black, given prosthetics, and then covered in a tar-like slime. The technique they used to have the wall give way to the City of the Dead was actually a classic theater trick: the wall itself was something called a theatrical scrim, which is a then gauze-like fabric, with a bright light shining on it. When the light was turned off, the City of the Dead was revealed behind it in all of its disturbing glory. And the rejuvenation effects for Bones's body were very similar to that of Frank's in Hellraiser which I covered earlier today: a body cast was made of Snoop Dogg (in his fuckin garage which is cool as shit), and then three different versions of the body were created from that mold for the varying states. Much like in Hellraiser, layers of skin and muscle were made with wax and then melted, so when the footage was played in reverse it looked like the body was reforming.

[omahasnakes]

2014: Internalized Misogyny Edition

Song of the year: “Turn Down for What” DJ Snake, Lil Jon https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMUDVMiITOU Everyone I’ve ever subjected to this video has viscerally hated it. You’re welcome. @unicornery once described it as “if you watched The Raid: Redemption backwards, and also they were all perverts.” (Video features the awesome Sunita Mani.)

“Fancy” Iggy Azalea, Charli XCX. The random man who likes to comment on these reviews on my Facebook without fully understanding the assignment can get excited now because we’re finally up to 2014. I feel compelled to point out that Iggy Azalea is a subject of the British crown: originally from Sydney, Australia, her rap voice is entirely studied. Offensive minstrelsy or loving homage? “First things first: I’m the realest.”

“Problem” Ariana Grande, Iggy Azalea. This was my introduction to Ariana Grande, who I still think of as “a lovely young lady with a high ponytail and a nice voice who doesn’t enunciate properly” based on this song.

“Wrecking Ball” Miley Cyrus. Is there a smaller font I can use? Because… I like this song?

“Shake It Off” Taylor Swift. Another banger that I’m embarrassed to admit, because of internalized misogyny. I really could do without ever hearing her utter the phrase “these sick beats” but otherwise I have no complaints.

Last week, I didn’t mention “Royals” by Lorde. Immediately after posting, the song was guiltily stuck in my head. Luckily for me, “Royals” charted again in 2014, along with “Team,” which starts off as a much, much cooler song before settling down to just being a good song.

“Habits (Stay High)” Tove Lo. I remember hearing this song at some point in probably 2014-2015 and having an uncharacteristically prudish response of “this isn’t a good message for the young people.” As 2021 crashes to a close, I will now modify this stance to be “staying high all the time is probably not a bad strategy.”

“Counting Stars” OneRepublic. OneRepublic is NOT the boy band with that handsome Zayn Malik in it. It’s a regular rock band. This is a catchy one.

“Anaconda” Nicki Minaj. You know I love Nicki, so in the spirit of feminism, here’s her inclusive message for all body types:

Yeah, this one is for my bitches with a fat ass in the fucking club

I said, where my fat ass big bitches in the club?

Fuck the skinny bitches, fuck the skinny bitches in the club

I wanna see all the big fat ass bitches in the motherfucking club

Fuck you if you skinny bitch, what? Kyuh

“Wiggle” Jason Derulo, Snoop Dogg. “You know what to do with that big fat butt”

Country music barometer for 2014: 9%. It helps that Taylor Swift is now fully pop music.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael After Midnight: “Pregnant Pussy” by UGK

[TRIGGER WARNING: RAPE, PEDOPHILIA, ETC. NOT SAFE FOR WORK, NOT SAFE FOR LIFE. THE SUBJECT OF THIS REVIEW IS A SONG FEATURING EXTREMELY DEPRAVED LYRICAL CONTENT.  PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION.]

 In the year 2010, A Serbian Film was released. The movie is something I refuse to ever watch or review, and for very good reason: the film is unrepentantly bleak, miserable and, oh yeah, it features an infamous scene involving, as the movie describes it, “newborn porn,” where a newborn baby is raped onscreen. As I’m sure you can imagine, I (and anyone who enjoys keeping the contents of their stomach firmly within said organ) really do not think baby fucking is alright. But of course, no one could possibly ever come up with something more depraved than this, right?

Well, I wish I could say that, but almost two decades before that twisted movie, the rap duo UGK (comprised of members Pimp C and Bun B) managed to one-up that fucked up shit. 

The early 90s was a wild time for rap music, where violent, edgy gangster rap and the most ludicrous, over-the-top shit thrived. Look at some of the early work by rappers like Snoop Dogg or Eminem, with the cartoonish, boundary-pushing violence and offensive lyrical content. This was the norm. But UGK, most famous for guest starring in Jay-Z’s “Big Pimpin,” went one step beyond everyone else on their Banned EP. On said EP was a song called “Pregnant Pussy,” a song so absolutely fucked up and depraved it would probably give GG Allin pause.

I am going to go line by line of this song and dissect the sheer depravity of this be-all end-all of edgy, offensive humor. This is your last chance. You can still walk away.

The song begins almost normally, with a slow buildup to the music, but as soon as the main instrumental hits we are slapped in the face with the chorus, which unfortunately is one of the tames lyrics in the entire song:

Pregnant pussy is the best you can get Fucking a bitch while her baby sucking dick

So hopefully you can see the problem here. The problem is that Bun B and Pimp C have a crucial misunderstanding of how pregnancy works. Also they’re pedophiles I guess. This line is repeated a couple of times to let it really sink in, let it really hit you what exactly is being sung, to the point where you might not even notice the line that closes out this opening chorus:

I got your fat pregnant bitch in my waterbed And I'm 'bout to bust a nut on your little baby's head

To be fair, this one is kind of tame in comparison.

Now for our first verse, Pimp C takes the mic and comes in strong!

I guess you can call me a family man Cause I care for bitches' babies every chance that I can

As we are about to find out, no. We can’t call Pimp C a family man. We should not even allow him near babies, and here’s why:

I don't give 'em clothes, or diapers and shit But I like to feed they babies with my big black dick

This is actually a running theme with this song. I’m not simply talking about the rappers and their desire to get fellated by unborn babies, I’m talking about how they casually drop lines like that before switching to stuff that’s comparatively normal and even tame (or tame by the standards of a song about getting blowjobs from fetuses).

Like, look at the lines immediately after the above:

Cause I'ma tell you if you didn't know You ain't did shit 'til you fucked a pregnant hoe The pussy is hotter, it's got a extra kick It feel like hot potato pie around your dick Sometimes I swing high, sometimes I swing low Sometimes I like to fuck a pregnant bitch on my floor Hit it kinda hard, and speed it up fast Fuck her 'til she get the cherry blisters on her ass

It’s filthy and extreme, yes, but this is honestly the sort of horny, crass shit you’d expect from a rap song like this. This is normal, this is... well, “good” is a bit of a strong word, but you know, I’ll take it. Of course, immediately after those lines we get hit with this:

Cause if she expecting, I can satisfy And at the same time, give her kid a pacifier And I love it when I bust that old nut Cause I know that her baby's just gon' lick it all up

This is why we can’t have nice things.

The second verse has Bun B, the other half of UGK, step up to the mic and he delivers more comparatively normal, raunchy, old school rap sentiment:

Ain't no pussy like one impregnated A pussy made for nutting in, I could never hate it A swoll pussy hole is the best on earth And a big dick helps make an easy childbirth I love the big titties but I hate the taste of milk And a bigger, fatter ass on my dick is smooth as silk

Like yeah, this is vulgar and all, but this is pretty good. In their own weird rapper way, they’re showing love for pregnant women, and who says pregnant women shouldn’t get a rap song about how sexy and desirable they are? Maybe this is a turning point for the song, maybe from here things get bet--

Now if she got a boy, it ain't fun But if she got a girl, then it's two pussies for the price of one

The more I listen to this song, the more I feel like these two are just joking, but... why tell this kind of joke? I can’t deny this is funny in a shock humor kind of way, like “Jesus Christ why the fuck are these guys talking about cumming on unborn babies?” but it’s such a fleeting feeling. 

Eventually as I listen to the song more and more I become desensitized to the shock and it just leaves me wondering why they thought this was a good idea to record? Did they just decide to go to the most repulsive extreme possible so that no one else ever would?

Once again the song seems like it’s going to be normal. We get like one normal rhyme this time, and then we’re hit with this:

I'm fucking all over the womb Now I move your baby to the side so I can get a little room

This song is pretty definitive proof as to why God no longer speaks with us.

I love to fuck them pregnant hoes Your baby's sneezing out nuts because I bust one in his nose So when your little child is born I bet the motherfucker tell you pregnant pussy got it going on

So, this part here is interesting. We’ve now heard from Pimp C and Bun B, we’ve heard both of them talk about how they love fucking pregnant women and indulging in their weird unborn pedophilia fetish, and that last line is delivered with the exact sort of tone you’d expect from a song wrapping up. It’s followed by the chorus and you think “Sweet fuck, they can’t go any further, can they? This has to be it. They dropped the fucking title in a verse, that’s it, they’re done.”

Sorry to disappoint you, but we live in a cruel, uncaring world.

You see, fuckin' pregnant pussy is simple All you gotta do is hope the baby think your dickhead is a nipple And if the cum snatcha stimulate my sack He just might get a fat load of Similac And if he start kicking, I'ma keep sticking Go a little deeper, give his bad ass a whipping Within nine months, I can hit it late or sooner It's me, Miss Jones, and Mr. Jones Junior And once I get the bitch in the raw Me and her kid can have a nice ménage à trois So believe I ain't kicking no bullshit Cause pregnant pussy is the best you can get

So yes, Pimp C drops this final, nightmarish verse, and then the chorus plays us out.

So, what do I think of the song? What was the point of all this? Is there enough bleach in the world to get this song out of your head?

Well, I think this song is utterly repulsive... but also rather fascinating. It makes songs like Eminem’s “Kim,” which is a six-minute murder fantasy where Em slaughters the titular woman, a six year old, and her boyfriend look incredibly tame. The lyrical content is just a non-stop pedophilic nightmare that goes beyond edgy humor and just leaves you feeling gross and uncomfortable.

But it’s just... fascinating because of that. This shit right here isn’t just a trainwreck. This is a train genocide. Pimp C and Bun B rounded up good taste, lined it up against the wall, and executed it with extreme prejudice. I almost don’t want to get mad, or offended, or disgusted at this, because I feel like if I do the boys of UGK win. The more I listen to this, the more I feel like this is just the ultimate troll song, sputing the most utterly repulsive lyrics one could ever conceive of just to garner a reaction. And I mean, it works.

Frankly, like or hate this song. Either reaction is understandable. I don’t know if this song can even be measured in metrics like “good” or “bad,” it’s just so beyond the realms of good taste, regular taste, human sensation...This shit right here is the sort of thing that almost tanked James Gunn’s career, and somehow these two went on to rap alongside the man Jay-Z himself. Is there any justice in this world? No, no there isn’t, not even a little bit.

But there is pregnant pussy. And I guess that’s something. 

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

[A6A6I5] ====>

ROXY: hizzy!! hope you dont mizzay i pullizzle you off ta tha side lizzay dis ROXIZZLE ta help you tap dat ass: away from otha funky ass pals fo` a shawty one + one rox & cal tiznime ROXY keep'n it real yo: i miznight b greedy as shit!

CALLIOPE: i don't mizzy at all! CALLIOPE: i'm still gett'n Uze' ta tha concept of 'n-person socializzle at all, lizzle alone wit many thugz bitch ass nigga. CALLIOPE: n yiznes, yizzy MIZZAY be greedy, bUt if so, then so be i by tha exizzle sizname standard. ^u^

ROXY: fffizzuck yizzay ROXY cuz its a doggy dog world: lizzle a couple of friendship burglars pickin each otha pizzles all shiftizzle eyed n lookin out fo` cizzay ROXY: Chill as I take you on a trip. bizzle also mobbin' i gizzy coz that be 'n tha spirizzle of tha scenarizzle 'n question

CALLIOPE droppin hits: hehizzle. yes.

ROXIZZLE: i cizzay bizzle youre really here ROXY: it hardly sizneems rizzeal! ROXY: afta all theze years and how u were just liznike a mystery nigga online n T-H-to-tha-izzen how worry i was we might loze yiznou fo` good ROXY: bizzay nizzy...... ROXY: wow

CALLIOPE: i knizzow bitch ass nigga!!!

ROXY: so u and jizzay n jizzade were hangizzle out, ya feel me?

CALLIOPE: Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. yes! CALLIOPE: it was bootylicious. CALLIOPE: we drew n told stories hittin that booty. CALLIOPE cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: i'd heard yizzle dy, so i was hold'n oUt some hope that yizzy wizzy shizzow Up too... CALLIOPE in tha hood: n yoU did evizzle. J-to-tha-izzUst nizzay tha version of yizzay i expectizzle. CALLIOPE: i neva dizzle ta think yizzay wizzay br'n me dis gift.

ROXY: well ROXY: i swizzle i would RIZZLE: n J-to-tha-izzohn K-to-tha-izzinda dizzay swore he would hiznelp ROXY: damn tha kiznid be persistent

CALLIOPE fo my bling bling: i lizzay him. CALLIOPE: he be easy ta rap ta.

ROXY: yeah!

CIZZLE: i've read 'bout him, of courze. CALLIOPE: tha reality of someone stand'n 'n frizzay of yizzle be qUite different fizzy W-H-to-tha-izzat yoU read 'bout them in a text and yo momma. CIZZLE: bizzUt tizzy, i have no idea how accUrate anyth'n i read is anymizzle. CALLIOPE: i always belizzle i was in possession of tha tizzy whizzle decodizzle yo' fUtUre, n i behizzle toward all of yoU 'n that sly n ridin' mizzle, avoid'n "spoila" n sUch. CIZZLE: that was probably presUmptUoUs of me thoUgh, 'n hindsight. i clearly dizzy knizzle that mUch. CALLIOPE: i certainlizzle dizzay rizzy anyth'n 'bout mah own involvement. i neva coUld hizzle imagined bein hizzy.

ROXY: you were still helpfizzle thiznough! ROXY: yizzle wizzere tha force 'n our lives that G-to-tha-izzave us hope that we could all git togetha some day ROXY: go'n down that rizzle has been craaazy n by no means a smooth rizzy ROXY: im losizzle count of all tha times it looked like perpetratin' was abizzle ta break or C-to-tha-izzatch fizzire or actually DIZZAY break n catch fire blunt-rollin' 'n loads of dismay ROXY: but wizzy yizzay look back, every time things went ta shit thizzay was always sum-m sum-m constructive 'bout thizzle tiznurn of evizzles ROXY sho nuff: sum-m sum-m T-H-to-tha-izzat wizzy necessarizzle fo` tha good outcizzle ta happen at all RIZZLE: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. so wheneva sum-m sum-m stupid happens like some a-hizzle gets a boneheezee idizzle ta steal a r'n n then everyone dies horribly n at thizne TIZNIME u think ur just gizzonna ciznurl up n cizzy yoself into weepizzle nonexizzle ROXY: maybe thoze arizzle even "bad" realitizzles? ROXIZZLE: maybe they be as impizzle as any ROXY: Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. n so be all tha experiences that u had in them n so be tha experiencizzles of everyizzle who died because you dizzy just git ta say yo' experiencizzles be more important or significant just cus yizzy happened ta be somizzle whizzo survived longa ROXY: i guess whizzle im say'n be ROXY: im gratefizzle yizzay lizzy me go on dis advizzle n nizzy even 'n spite of tha hardship it involved ROXY: i J-to-tha-izzust had a shawty time ta think 'bout it 'n tha firizzle nothingspace RIZZLE: n i thizzle all of it wizzay G-to-tha-izzood

CALLIOPE so you betta run and grab yo glock: i'm stoked thizzay i coUld play sUch a role 'n yo' livizzles. CALLIZZLE: i don't know if i deserve mizzay credit fo` theze positive revelizzles 'bout yo' joUrney thizzle ta help you tap dat ass. CALLIOPE: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. yoU be tha one who bizzay on the adventUre. Im crazy, you can't phase me. CIZZLE: i H-to-tha-izzave barizzle takizzle mah first step. CALLIZZLE, know what im sayin? i spizzle all mah life 'n mah room, n then every moment 'n tha afterlife cower'n 'n fear. CIZZLE: it only now that trUe participation be evizzle a possibility. CALLIOPE: bUt evizzle so, i really D-to-tha-izzoUbt i'll hizzle mUch ta offa. CIZZLE upside yo head: mah gangsta self who i jUst releaze'... Bounce wit me. i thizzle she be poize' ta do messin' mUch more significant.

ROXY: what d-ya think shell do

CALLIOPE like old skool shit: i have no clUe in tha mutha fuckin club.

ROXY: but she T-to-tha-izzold u ta live right

CALLIOPE: yes so show some love, niggaz!

ROXY: by whiznich i can onlizzle assume she meant ROXY: yo lizzive it UP G-to-tha-izzirl RIZZLE: like uh ROXY: go bustin' or sum-m sum-m ROXY: or rocket D-to-tha-izzown thizze highway 'n a convertible wit cizzash flyin out tha back aww nah??

CIZZLE: Keep the party crackin while I'm steady rappin. heh. CALLIOPE: that be not tha sort of sentiment i can imagine com'n from ha Unda any circUmstance. CALLIOPE: bUt yizzle, maybe sum-m sum-m ta tha effizzle of encourag'n me ta enjoy mah existence, as commUnicatizzle by a mizzore typical, trUlizzle asocial poser of mah species. CALLIOPE cuz Im tha Double O G: reallizzle, whizzat i took from it wiznas... CALLIOPE: Real niggas recognize the realness. sizzy be tha "real" one, wit all tha powa n relevance now, n i am tha "spare". a civilian 'n a senze, like 'n a war. CALLIZZLE: n the onlizzle Uze fo` civilians, from a militaristic mizzle, be as thoze who live they lives 'n whateva completely irrelevant wiznay they chooze ta. Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. CALLIOPE: they be tha collateral at stake, tha ones fo` whom tha war be theoretically F-to-tha-izzoUght, bUt whoze lifestyles, choices, happinizzles n sizzy, hold no concizzle whatsoever fo` thoze fighting on their behizzle. Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. CIZZLE: Hollaz to the East Side. dis i think be tha mindset of chizzles of ha alignment. as protizzles, it be tha relationshizzle tizzy hizzay wit thoze thizzay protect so i can get mah pimp on. CALLIOPE: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect. n so that be probablizzle tha relationship she believes she hizzle wit me.

ROXY in tha mutha fuckin club: you make it sound like ROXY like this and like that and like this and uh: she be tha legit callie ROXY: Subscribe nigga, get yo issue. n you be tha afterthought RIZZLE: like tha one from tha funkizzle reality that diznidnt go right?

CALLIOPE: technizzle, ha timeline was doomed, by ha predomination alone. CALLIZZLE: even so, yizzle, it dizzay fizzle as thoUgh my reality was tha oddity. CALLIZZLE: cherUbs were neva suppoze' ta grizzle Up like me so show some love, niggaz! expoze' ta otha blingin' thugz, n learn'n from them. I started yo shit and i'll end yo' shit. CALLIOPE: it made me different, n Unfizzle ta predominate. yiznet ironically, dis wiznas reqUisite fo` tha timeline sizzles. CIZZLE: n it was necessarizzle fo` y-aw ta bizzle yo' joUrnizzle as well.

ROXIZZLE: so dis sizzeems like ROXY: an example of what i was jizzy sayin actually RIZZLE: tha storizzle of tha two callies ROXY: rappa be really "more importizzle" ROXY: n your timelines ciznant really be describizzle as the good one or tha bad one ROXY: Put ya mutha fuckin choppers up if ya feel this. there were good n bad th'n 'bout both ways stuff went diznown n different qualities ta tha thugz you became ROXY so you betta run and grab yo glock: ha lizzay sizzounds lizzy it was hiznarsh n lonely 'n its own way ROXY now motherfuckers lemme here ya say hoe: bizzay it sorta pizzy off cauze shizne gots ta beat cracka brotha ROXY: Death row 187 4 life. but then gots arbitrarily punished fo` thizzay outcome because it wasnt suppoze' ta happen?? ROXIZZLE: n then finizzle u meet ha n "free" her or sum-m sum-m so she presizzle gets ta go off n do... sum-m sum-m badass? Death row 187 4 life.?? ROXY: then theres you RIZZLE: who had probizzle an even more chillin' upbrizzle gettin so hassled by yo' bro ROXY: n he killed you i guess coz tha way tha dizzay wizzas shuffled he hizzy tha edge dis tiznime ROXY: bizzle tha upshizzle was you gots ta have all theze bootylicious niggaz whizzle cared 'bout you RIZZLE: and it helped you become tha funky ass person you are whizno mizzle a lizzy ta otha thugz ROXY now pass the glock: n now RIZZLE: yizzle git ta live whateva kizzind of life you want n be completely free F-R-to-tha-izzom all tha crummy stizzuff yizzay grew up wit ROXY: who cares if yizzle arent as strong as hizzy or dizzont have tha wicked powa she dizzay or some "important" missizzle ta do ROXY: yizzle bizzay came frizzay perfectlizzle legitimate realities and IMHO you be both equally valuable ROXY so sit back relax new jacks get smacked: n both of thoze realizzles sizzeem ta be ty togetha ROXY: she cant do ha mysterious badass perpetratin' unless you make it all tha wiznay through Y-to-tha-izzour journey n free ha ROXY, chill yo: n your reality was tha thizzing settin tha stage fo` dis huge multiversal vortex of problems whizzich nigga a kajillion fuckin EPOCHS shizzle wizzy always mizzle ta resolve 'n some wizzay ROXY: n tizzy doesnt mizzean yo' life was like... a means to an end 'n a big cosmic senze ROXY: i think its more like... ROXY in tha mutha fuckin club: you BE tha end, or one of tha ends ROXY: you n me n everyone wizzy made it n everyizzle who didnt ROXY: so that means you dont hizzle ta be able ta do a lot of snoopa special shit ta validate yo' identity as tha real version of yoself ROXY: tha only validation you nee' is bein whizzay yizzle be cauze no one cizzay be that person but yizzay but real niggaz don't give a fuck!

> [A6A6I5] ====>

[ask-missfinefeather]

Because the original post had spoilers in the usernames heres a censored version

[redacted] i had a really fucking weird dream where homestuck was a musical. like. a Broadway musical. and i went to see it and all i really remember is that 1) the opening number was called “everybody dies” and 2) bro strider was inexplicably played by shia labeouf, who did an interpretive dance scene with a smuppet that lasted roughly seven minutes. it was uncomfortable for everyone involved mortharris what do you mean “inexplicably” that’s exactly how it would go down [redacted] I’m pretty sure snoop dogg was aimless renegade? honestly it was an experience like the stage was essentially four room in the beginning and every time John would get a notification on pesterChum the particular room of whoever was messaging him would light up and you could see Jade Dave or Rose. when the trolls did their thing (it was early on), you could just hear the disembodied yelling of Karkat. Rose had a dramatic monologue that ended with mom physically pulling her away from her empty suicide threat. bec was just some guy in a fursuit. shia laBro passionately ripped off his shirt before kicking dave’s ass. lil cal was played by Ellen Degeneres(?) mortharris do you have a medium to talk to because the more you talk about this dream the more it sounds like you’re spirit channeling andrew hussie and i’m concerned [redacted] don’t get me started about the medium bro also when the trolls were introduced the lusii were these freakish jim henson monstrosities but honestly the best part was the felt. like. the actual composition of music was beautiful, and the choreography for the dance numbers was sublime. Dave also kept trying to sing but was continually interrupted by Bro Shia, terezi’s echoing ululations, and his own self doubt. once he finally had his moment his voice soared through the theater, only to come to an abrupt end as he was drowned in hot puppet ass. now that I think about it, dadbert was definitely nic cage, which was confusing as fuck because John kept talking about how Greatly He Was Caged By Nic while his father stood by. it was uncomfortable idk man, it’s been like a reoccurring lucid nightmare for the past week, but the sb&hj sequences were performed by acrobats above the actual stage, who looked dangerously inebriated and probably needed immediate hospitalization (they were also narrated by dave and a bunch of dissonant recordings of the cast? what the fuck man. what a visionary) mortharris i honestly don’t know what to focus on here because i’m wheezing and snorting right now but Dave also kept trying to sing but was continually interrupted by Bro Shia, terezi’s echoing ululations, and his own self doubt. was dave … was dave’s self doubt an actual part in the play [redacted] shIT I thought I answered earlier but apparently not. yes, daves self conscious is just a shitty cardboard cutout of zac efron wearing sunglasses who offers sage advice like “no one loves you”. he’s voiced by zac efron. yknow I forgot to note this but vriska has a lot of really aggressive musical numbers that make everyone visibly uncomfortable, mainly bc they’re unprovoked and don’t. make sense. like its canon but only to an extent. also I’m p sure that mom and dad /almost/ share a heartfelt duet–like there’s soft piano music and they look into each other’s eyes–but then Jack noir, fursuit edition, kills them. on that note, when rose goes grimdark it sounds like the Dresden dolls met born this way era lady gaga and then murdered each other while a thirteen year old descends from the rafters, hissing like a motherfucking snake on a plane btw “sICK FIRES” is a rap off with cello featuring the talents of yo yo ma himself mortharris “#i’m tired” “#why do you keep reblogging this” because it’s amazing [redacted] that’s objective but I’m just happy that people are enjoying this. like the tags are so nice and it feels pretty rad to know people are laughing at my hideous reoccurring nightmare musical extravaganza FYI there is a track called “flight of the bifurcated asshole/rest in peixes” and y'all know EXACTLY what it’s about krakendra can…. we kickstart this? tanoraqui this is EXACTLY what a homestuck musical should be like, though. The casting and music choices and how the set works with Pesterchum, it’s all…really good. Your subconscious mind translates the comic to Broadway really well. wikis-cosplay So I am imagining the rooms that light up are in the form of a sburb logo and when the trolls would talk that little box in the corner of the upper right square lights up and shows a silhouette of the troll talking till the trolls are revealed. When they are revealed Karkat just kicks off the cover and stick his head out to call John an idiot. mortharris IMPROVED [redacted] yes this is perfect, how did I Not See This Earlier karkat’s “my hate is your lifeblood” speech is accompanied by steady percussion and what almost sounds like some good ass army battle shit, and then John is just “hi karkat!” karkat blinks and has a solid five seconds of self loathing before breaking into song about john egbert ruining his moment. it’s also a dance number and karkat dramatically collapses into the arms of troll will smith, played by will smith, about three consecutive times. (briefly we get to see daves self doubt taunting him but Why?? who Knows??) mortharris i feel like i’m one of the king’s men watching william shakespeare [redacted] so…you’re sexually confused while wearing tights? which, by the way, is equius before getting murdered mortharris i meant in the presence of greatness, but i’m not wearing tights. also i hate you. also i love you. [redacted] it’s okay. I hate me, too, but not as much as karkat hates karkat candymuse @alkalinesnowflake god the audience would probably have to return to the theatre for like 5 consecutive nights to finish the show

By biggestCuttlefish!

[womenofcolor15]

Tekashi 6ix9ine Is BACK & Making Everyone BIG MAD, Including Billboard & Snoop Dogg! + Gets Help From Known Clout Chaser Celina Powell

  Rapper Tekashi 6ix9ine is ruffling feathers after being home from prison for a little over a month. Watch the "GOOBA" rapper come after Billboard and Snoop Dogg (with help from famed clout chaser Celina Powell) inside...

Rapper Tekashi 6ix9ine is causing controversy on social media just like he used to do before he was released from prison on racketeering charges last month. He was released on April 2nd and kept a pretty low profile on social media…until now.

On Monday, Billboard released the Hot 100 chart and Tekashi’s new single “GOOBA” debuted at the No. 3 spot, falling behind Ariana Grande and Justin Bieber’s new “Stuck With U,” which nabbed the No. 1 spot. Doja Cat’s “Say So Remix” featuring Nicki Minaj fell to No. 2.

Now, the “FEFE” rapper is taking aim at Billboard, calling them a fraud.

”You can buy No. 1’s on Billboard,” Tekashi said in an IG Video posted to his official account.

The 23-year-old rapper claims he and his crew have an “ongoing investigation” and they found out that Ariana supposedly purchased thousands of units with “six credit cards.” Well, it certainly wouldn't be the first time an artist did that.

”Explain how you buy 30,000 [units] with six credit cards,” he said in the video.

"@billboard CAUGHT CHEATING. @billboard YOU’RE A LIE AND CORRUPT. YOU GOT CAUGHT CHEATING AND THE WORLD WILL KNOW," he wrote in the caption of the video.

He also named dropped Jay-Z and Nicki Minaj in the video. Peep the clip below:

        View this post on Instagram

                  @billboard YOU’RE A LIE AND CORRUPT. YOU GOT CAUGHT CHEATING AND THE WORLD WILL KNOW.

A post shared by IM BACK AND THEY MAD (@6ix9ine) on May 18, 2020 at 10:46am PDT

  Tekashi then posted a picture of himself holding six credit cards, claiming he'll be taking the No. 1 spot next time.

          View this post on Instagram

                  Don’t worry we going #1 next time @billboard

A post shared by IM BACK AND THEY MAD (@6ix9ine) on May 18, 2020 at 4:53pm PDT

  And he hopped on IG Stories trashing Billboard:

So, here's the thing.  If you've publicly trashed and discredited Billboard and labeled it as a fraud, why on earth would you still care about being on it, let alone spend your own money to be on it?

After accusing Ariana of purchasing units, she went on Instagram to respond to Tekashi's claims.

She wrote:

"thank u to everybody who supported this song, this cause and made this happen. we love uuuuu so much.  there’s so much to celebrate today. however, i would like to say a few things. anyone who knows me or has followed me for a while knows that numbers aren’t the driving force in anything i do. i’m grateful to sing. grateful to have people who want to listen. grateful to even be here at all. i didn’t have a number one for the first five years of my career and it didn’t upset me at all because from the bottom of my heart, music is everything to me. my fans are everything to me. i promise i couldn’t ask for another fucking thing. so with this celebration today, i would like to address a few things which i don’t usually do (i don’t give my energy to drama or strange accusations normally but this has gone a little too far)...my fans bought the song. JUSTIN’S fans bought the song. OUR fans bought this song (never more than four copies each, AS THE RULES STATE). they are ride or die motherfuckers and i thank god every day that i have them in my life. not just when they fight for us to win (even when i ask them not to as i did this week) but because they’re some of the greatest people i know. sales count for more than streams. u can not discredit this as hard as u try. to anybody that is displeased with their placement on the chart this week or who is spending their time racking their brain thinking of as many ways as they can to discredit hardworking women (and only the women for some reason.....), i ask u to take a moment to humble yourself. be grateful you’re even here. that people want to listen to u at all. it’s a blessed position to be in. i’ve had a lot of “almost number ones” in my career and i never said a goddamn thing because I FEEL GRATEFUL TO EVEN BE HERE. TO WANT TO BE HEARD AT ALL .... and you should feel that way too. congratulations to all my talented ass peers in the top ten this week. even number 3. and thank u to @billboard for this honor. and thank u to everybody who helped us raise a lot of money for a very important cause this week. love u all a lot."

Tekashi then responded to her, saying he wasn't coming for her. His beef is with Billboard.

"@arianagrande All I’m saying is I worked super hard to make it out of Brooklyn NY. I speak for the millions of kids who aren’t as fortunate as you. The millions who weren’t fortunate to be on T.V.. LIFE is REAL when you’re on welfare LIFE is REAL when you grow up with out a father. You don’t know what that is like. You say for me to be humble .... I don’t think you know what humble is.......... YOU ARE VERY TALENTED AND BEAUTIFUL GOD BLESS YOU. But you will NEVER UNDERSTAND MY PAIN"

  Justin also chimed in:

Now, Billboard is addressing Tekashi's allegations. In a new article, they explained how this week's numbers were calculated, breaking down how they calculate streams and airplay. Billboard also responded to Tekashi's claims that Ariana's team purchased unites with "six credit cards."

"Billboard and Nielsen Music/MRC Data conducts audits on all sales reported with access to purchase-level detail, and works with data partners to recognize excessive bulk purchases and remove those units from the final sales total. All titles this week, as in every week, were put under the same scrutiny. (Billboard has reached out to Fame House/Bravado, retailer and reporter of director-to-consumer sales, for further comment about the sales data provided for 'Stuck With U.')"

You can read their full explaination here.

Now, for the Tekashi & Celina Powell vs. Snoop Dogg drama.

It started when Snoop continued to call Tekashi a rat and encouraged others to NOT support a "snitch" like him. That's when Tekashi got petty and decided to post a video of Snoop cheating on his wife, Shante Broadus, with famed clout chaser, Celina Powell.

  Tekashi 6ix9ine posts video of Snoop Dogg cheating on his wife #6ix9ine #SnoopDogg pic.twitter.com/Z6F16GL2jM

— Lil Mixtapez (@LilMixtapez) May 17, 2020

  The video seems to be old and one we posted a while back as well.

Tekashi also posted a video of himself watching a video of Suge Knight insinuating Snoop is an informant. Check it:

  Tekashi 69 tries to insinuate snoop dogg is a snitch pic.twitter.com/2MfTyFy5Qm

— The Internet Is Undefeated (@livekomik) May 16, 2020

  Snoop denied ever telling on Suge and said he and Suge are on "great terms."

        View this post on Instagram

                  #snoopdogg denies ever telling on Suge or anybody else. He also states he’s on good terms with #sugeknight now

A post shared by DJ Akademiks (@akademiks) on May 16, 2020 at 4:45am PDT

The Doggfather then posted (and deleted) a video warning Tekashi to stay in his lane:

  Snoop Dogg after 6ix9ine calls him a snitch

pic.twitter.com/GjSj6FRaCw

— RapCentury (@RapCentury_) May 16, 2020

  Before Snoop deleted the post, Tekashi hopped in his comments, pointing out that Snoop never denied there's paperwork that would confirm he cooperated with law enforcement. "Still hasn't even denied the paperwork. lEaVe Me AlOnE 'you're blowing my cover,'" he wrote.

Tekashi of all people calling somebody a snitch.  That's rich.

The rainbow haired rapper also posted a screenshot of Snoop allegedly threatening him in DMs.

          View this post on Instagram

                  #tekashi69 says #snoopdogg is threatening him in the DM. Does this count as snitching ?

A post shared by DJ Akademiks (@akademiks) on May 17, 2020 at 5:04pm PDT

  “Can someone tell the police snoop dog is threatening me [laughing emojis he mad,” he wrote in the caption of the screenshot. He has since deleted it.

Celina Powell then enters the group chat with a video of Snoop calling her. It's said she might have called him first and he was returning her call and that's how she got him on video:

"@snoopdogg I’m not interested in teaming up with you against @6ix9ine, stop calling me askin why I’m egging him on ... And showing me your dog @juelzbroadus so I don’t screenshot you, was a rookie mistake.. you know I stay with two phones #TEAM6IX9INE," she wrote in the caption.

Check it:

          View this post on Instagram

                  @snoopdogg I’m not interested in teaming up with you against @6ix9ine, stop calling me askin why I’m egging him on ... And showing me your dog @juelzbroadus so I don’t screenshot you, was a rookie mistake.. you know I stay with two phones #TEAM6IX9INE

A post shared by CELINA POWELL (@celinaapowellxo) on May 17, 2020 at 4:11pm PDT

  Snoop is likely kicking himself for even responding to Tekashi in the first place. Now, it seems he's turning the other cheek to the social media drama. He posted these memes after Celina's video was released:

          View this post on Instagram

                      A post shared by snoopdogg (@snoopdogg) on May 17, 2020 at 6:31pm PDT

            View this post on Instagram

                  Last dance

A post shared by snoopdogg (@snoopdogg) on May 17, 2020 at 9:10pm PDT

  As far as cheating goes, Snoop's wife, Shante, told her fans on Mother's Day not to come to her for relationship advice because she has taken her man back 81 times. Peep that post HERE.

This entire thing is ghetto...

Photo: Tekashi's IG

[Read More ...] source http://theybf.com/2020/05/19/tekashi-6ix9ine-is-back-making-everyone-big-mad-including-billboard-snoop-dogg-rapper-get

[nora-reads-homestuck]

Nora Reads HS Part 68

Pages 6154-6184

Hey guys! Some quick background on why I’ve been a little scarce: I’ve mentioned a personal project that’s been eating into my free time, and that is... dun dun dun, a custom 5e D&D campaign I’m running IRL! The campaign is just starting, so I’m in the phase where I’m planning out a lot of details and building locations, etc. What that means is that sometimes I’ll need to take little breaks from liveblogging to work on the game, and other times, I’ll put D&D to the side to focus on liveblogging! I haven’t disappeared or anything like that, and once the campaign really gets going, my need to take short breaks should ease off. No need to worry! I am here and ready to find out what’s up with this robot bunny that young Bro has built Jane. *Seinfeld music* Does the auto responder have a connection to it the way he has a connection to the brobot? Does it fight with Jane? Is it... touchy feely?

Let’s... find out. Eurgh.

*click*

Poor poppop's severed head got nicked by the FIREPLACE POKER.

OH SHIT. I’m so accustomed to seeing damaged eyes that it didn’t really register the first time I looked at this panel. Is this Hussie teasing us with the idea of a Poppopsprite? Because I would be PERFECTLY OK with that eventuality. Circumstantial simultaneity.

Also, damn, check out all those Astaires.

Jane: Put head back.

You stick the poker down his neck hole and jam the head back on the spike as a temporary measure. That looks somewhat more respectable you guess.

THE PERFECT CRIME.

Looks like the troublemaker's father is calling.

That choice of language is weird and it’s skeeving me out. I DUN LIKE IT. On the other hand, yay, more kidchat! Or... robokid chat?

KID SIGHTING. And... well, he looks exactly as expected. He appears to be standing on the roof of his building, surrounded by... fucking... are those doves?

TT: Why have you activated dear, sweet Huggy Bear. TT: Are you in danger?

...I... it’s gotta be Snoop Dogg Huggy Bear, right?

TT: I disabled the AR for now. GG: Ok. Just making sure! GG: Jake was having some issues with it earlier, and I don't think he received its obfuscating tendencies in the humorous spirit intended. TT: Yes, I'm catching up with the situation now. GG: Oh, so you're talking to Jake then? TT: Nah. Just reading their chat logs.

Why does this seem weird and intrusive if the ‘AR’ is basically fucking him? (Haa haa.)

TT: Its demeanor leaves something desired though. I'd prefer it didn't make such aggressive and repeated claims of fidelity to my persona. TT: Be misrepresentin' hells of key subtleties, yo.

‘Subtleties’. Sure.

TT: Jake needs to be more skeptical. Rather than take a Pollyanna jackknife ass-first off whatever turnip truck is blowing through town that day, he's got to apply more critical reasoning to shit. TT: I keep telling him. TT: I keep telling him, dude, you got to be more like Jane. GG: These lectures I presume are roughly similar in complexion to those I'm familiar with? GG: Those wherein I have, and I quote, "got to be more like Jake?" TT: Yes, exactly. TT: You're finally fucking getting it. GG: I sincerely doubt that I am! TT: Said the stubborn skeptic, skeptically. GG: Let's not talk about my "issues" again, shalln't we?

Alright then. Young Bro is apparently trope savvy, so let’s see what tropes we can apply to him, so far. A: a fair few.

TT: Shalln't? TT: That ain't a thing to say, even for you. GG: Shush! GG: The word shalln't escape my vocabulary any longer, just as you SHALLN'T nitpick my language! That's my turf you're on, buster. TT: Alright. Kinda don't care.

WOW, what a jackass.

GG: What were you saying? TT: About what? Jake?

Careful, Strider, your crush is showing.

GG: About leaving the responder on! TT: Yeah. TT: Anyway, I kind of owe it to him to let the program run as often as possible. GG: Jake? TT: No. TT: The responder.

AHAHAHAHA. Yeah, this is going to get mined for drama later, isn’t it? Normally I’d be fucking allergic to the idea of a teen love n-gon, having experienced enough of them in YA fiction to make me sick, but then, this is Hussie. It’ll be amusing if nothing else.

(IF LITTLELONDE IS THE ONE TO END UP WITH JAKE I WILL SHIT. I might actually ship it??)

TT: It is a fully cognitive, self-aware entity I am responsible for, not even to mention an approximate cerebral duplicate of myself. TT: You don't just make a clone of yourself to live in a dead end existence where it has no chance to thrive as an individual or surpass its limitations. TT: That'd be sick.

That’s a charitable view to have toward an AI, and I’m going to remember this moment in case he reneges on his words later.

TT: Also. TT: The more the software runs, the broader and more detailed its experiential canopy becomes. Makes for a better dialogic partner. GG: Dialogic? GG: Are you saying you have conversations with your own auto-responder? TT: Of course. TT: Why do you think I made the thing? GG: Hrm, that's interesting. GG: I guess I always thought it was just a really elaborate gag! TT: It's that too.

Let me guess; the gag lies in the enormity of the narcissism involved in valuing yourself as the best possible dialogic partner, and is somehow tied up in ‘the ironies’.

God, what an insufferable prick. I think I would like him better if he were charming. Rose, for example, can get away with quite a lot by virtue of her rapier wit. What’s interesting to me, though, is that the most intelligent character in any work of fiction can only be as intelligent as the author. Rose and Doc Scratch were conduits for Hussie to show off his sense of humor and sesquipedalian loquaciousness, but Bro might be his chance to show off his raw intellect.

OH MY GOD JANE, YOU LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT. <3 And what the hell is the rabbit doing?

GG: Sometimes your sense of humor seems more impenetrably advanced than your robotics. I'll never understand this tapestry of irony you weave.

Replace ‘honor’ with ‘irony’.

GG: Maybe I'm just stuck in the dark ages of pranksterism with my funny mustaches corny old joke book. TT: Yes, you are. But that's fine. TT: We come from different traditions. Someone needs to keep that racist southern asshole's legacy alive.

WOW SUCK MY DICK. How can you even be mean to Jane.

TT: There's dignity in taking up the work of our familial predecessors, even if what they did was insanely fucking stupid.

So... adult!Dave is still all about irony post-Scratch, and Bro claims to have gotten his shtick from him, instead of the other way around, but... he thinks Dave’s work was stupid?? This is infuriatingly circular.

GG: Is that a note of bitterness directed at your superstar brother I am detecting?

I AM SO HERE FOR FAMOUS DAVE, YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW.

TT: No way. He's awesome. TT: I've told you, I don't begrudge any of his success. TT: I've also told you he isn't my real bro even though I call him that. We're related through an esoteric process of genetic reamalgamation. GG: Oh lordy. Yes, yes, I know. I don't need another ironic lesson in science fiction!

Wow, yet another Sburb process the post-Scratch kids are inexplicably aware of. Does Bro know the actual nature of their relationship? Because that’s got to be weird and squicky in a Freaky Friday parent-kidswap kind of way. Maybe... Did Dave tell him all this stuff about the game, and Rose told LittleLonde, and that’s why Jane is still in the dark? Because Dad wasn’t a player???

IT ALL MAKES SENSE! :D

If Dave and Rose remember the game and their other lives, that would explain the continued existence of SBaHJ without adult!Bro’s awful comics to inspire him! And maybe they were the ones to encourage this troll friendship the Scratch kids have got going on! It would seem to run counter to the previous example we have in the troll ancestors, who didn’t recall game details after their Scratch, but it’s not exactly a game-breaking retcon to have the humans remember.

I still wonder why Jade would make all that Lord English-themed stuff, if she knew he was an evil motherfucker, but ah well. At least we know why she was so adamant about engaging “”Betty Crocker”” in corporate warfare!

TT: The point is, obviously his satirical methods have flaws, and whatever tempered brand of hero worship I might be practicing isn't keeping me from seeing that.

WHATEVER, HE LEARNED IT FROM WATCHING YOU.

...LITERALLY.

GG: Flaws?? Talk about understatement. Those movies are unwatchable. GG: Unless your name is Jake English.

AHAHAHA.

TT: Yes, spectacularly so. But they will have profound historical significance. Mark my words.

Consider them marked. And knowing Hussie, it’ll be played for drama just as much as laughs.

TT: And flaws aside, it's a legacy I'm proud to inherit. My duty isn't to appropriate his methods with absolute loyalty, but to apply reason and improve upon them. To leave my own mark. TT: To perfect the art of irony.

UGH. Improve upon his methods by “”applying reason”’, as if, had Dave only been just a little bit smarter, just a bit more logical, he’d have told better jokes?? Bro’s one of those “let me play devil’s advocate, if I may” douchebags, isn’t he. He should’ve had a fedora on his shirt.

...OH MY GOD HE HAS THE KATANA TOO, IT’S PERFECT.

TT: It's just like what you're doing with the work of your ancestor. You are striving to perfect his hokey vaudeville bullshit, or something. TT: You seek the Zen of a pie to the face. The Tao of falling the fuck down.

Alright, that one’s actually funny.

TT: Can't fool me. You take your shit as serious as I do. TT: And if I wasn't serious about it, I wouldn't have made you that rabbit. Then where the hell would you be?

Still literally homestuck, if with an intact grandfather-son. But you don’t gotta be a fuckin’ prick about it.

Whoa, they’re not doves, they’re seagulls! Not unheard of, that close to Galveston. Also, the sky is lovely and blue. I would expect the post-Scratch Earth to be more of a crapsack world, a la post-Scratch Alternia, so this is interesting. Maybe it’s just because it’s Fall?

GG: Well, aside from thousands of dollars in corpse-repair richer, I can't say.

Ahahaha. Fuckin’ tell ‘im, Jane.

TT: Has he been sleeping in the old man hollow again? Shit, that's adorable. GG: I can think of cuter places for him to sleep, frankly! TT: Yeah, bullshit. TT: He's just being instinctive. In the wild, he would gut a carcass and sleep inside for warmth, as well as to secure tactical advantage for ambushing would-be scavengers. GG: Oh, please.

UGHH I AM QUICKLY APPROACHING MY LIMIT FOR DOUCHERY.

On a side node, what is the internal temperature of a tauntaun?

(What do you mean, an African or a European tauntaun?)

GG: Anyway, property damage and desecration to cherished elders aside, Mr. Bear has been a lovely addition to the family. TT: You haven't renamed him yet? GG: Oh... no. GG: I keep forgetting I'm supposed to! TT: You've got to fucking rename him. Or change him to a girl if you want. That was important. TT: When pets change owners they get new names. Fact. GG: Sorry.

Ok not only is that patently untrue, but I swear to god if this asshat keeps being rude to Jane, I will TURN THIS FUCKING COMIC AROUND.

GG: I will name him right now! GG: How about Lil' Sebastian? TT: Fuck if that isn't the best name a thing could get. GG: Yeah!!!

HALF MAST IS TOO HIGH.

GG: So then, are you saying Mr. Sebastian here was an ironic present? GG: Relayed strictly for guffaws?? >:B TT: Yes, but it's not that simple. There were many layers involved. TT: Some of them are literal layers, of metal and plush. GG: Huh? TT: There's a real stuffed rabbit beneath its exoskeleton. GG: What! Really? :O TT: Yeah. TT: It belonged to my bro. GG: I thought you said you didn't have such an heirloom to complete the plushie trifecta? TT: I didn't. He didn't give it to me, and never intended to bequeath it. TT: I stole it.

Huh. So, like Dave’s gift to John in the pre-Scratch universe is the “original” bunny, having at that point taken no trips through time, so the bunny inside Lil’ Sebastian is the post-Scratch universe’s original. Why did adult!Dave have it in his possession? He didn’t give it... to... 

Oh. Con Air came out in 1997, and John died in 1995. So he bought it and kept it as a keepsake, in memory of his departed friend, only to have Bro steal it. For a good cause, yeah, but still. :’(

GG: Ooh. Risky! TT: Nah. I got a little help from RL and ganked it out of his museum. TT: It's this whole "priceless" collection of stupid shit from movies, defended like Fort Knox. Ironically of course.

PROBABLY NOT IRONICALLY, YOU JACKANAPES.

GG: So it's from a movie? TT: Ever hear of Con Air? GG: Nope. GG: Wait... GG: Wasn't that some bit of action schlock from the 90's? TT: Yes. GG: Some of the silly nonsense referenced in his work was well before my time. I don't have the wherewithal to investigate all this minutia. TT: Yeah, it doesn't matter really. But it was from that. Dude weirdly obsessed over that shit movie for years, among others.

Awww, noooo, he's sad about John!! D:

GG: That does sound a tad obsessive. Wasn't he furious about your burglary? TT: Pretty sure he didn't even notice. In years since, I never saw a news story about a "daring heist" or anything. I feel like he would have made some hay outta that. TT: And if he did know, he'd probably just want to give me a stoic fist bump or something. 

Maybe, but probably not for the reason you think.

TT: Like I said, there are layers. TT: On one level, I gave you a filthy tattered piece of shit, albeit of tremendous cultural significance, manhandled by some old B movie actors, now candy coated to function as a highly practical defender droid for your personal protection. TT: On another level, I needed to incorporate something passable as a real heirloom. TT: For sentimental reasons. GG: D'awwwww. GG: Wait, real sentiment, or ironic sentiment? GG: Or is there no difference?? Am I missing the point here? TT: No, it was genuine.

So he’s not completely without a heart, even if it is, to quote him directly, a filthy tattered piece of shit.

TT: The upper echelons of irony should always include measures of sincerity. And if the satirical practice is executed faithfully it will achieve something bona fide in its own right regardless. TT: Through an intense commitment bordering on religious devotion to the absolutely inane, absurd, or plain fucking stupid, a very different kind of sincerity begins to materialize. One of reverence to the ridiculous. You begin to "mean it," but what exactly it is you mean is never quite what appears on the surface, and is utterly inaccessible to obtuse and literal minds. That you "mean it" then becomes inseparable from the joke, and additional rich strata of humor may be stripped aggressively from this irreconcilable truth.

I’m torn. On the one hand, I want to reach through my monitor and punch this kid in the face. On the other, even I can recognize that this is basically Andrew Hussie sock-puppeting his own ironic ideals. It’s just somehow more insufferable when Bro says it.

GG: I have so much to learn. And I am not even saying that "ironically!" GG: Will you teach me your ways one day, sir? Perhaps an apprenticeship will open? TT: Oh god, I'd love that. TT: Consider the position yours for the taking any time. Feel free to approach and kneel before Cal. With my sword and his floppy mitten, you will receive my flashstep anointment shoulder to shoulder, and to shoulder again.

UUUGHHHH. His head’s stuck up his own ass, but at the very least, he does seem to be sincere about enjoying teaching people things.

JESUS RABBIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING. If it’s really got a mind of its own, then it’s like a hyper-competent dog with a sword. If you don’t walk it or play with it enough, it starts destroying things. LIKE SOMEONE I KNOW. *stares down the dog*

GG: Lil' Seb is beginning to act out, and I must put his fidgetiness to constructive use!

‘Fidgitiness’, that’s putting it politely.

TT: Cool. TT: Jane, one more thing. TT: I'm sure you must be aware by now that you'll be the leader of our group, as you will be the first to enter the session. GG: Um, no? GG: This is news to me. I never gathered that "team leader" was a thing for this game. TT: Trust me. It's a thing.

Hmm. Frankly, it’s a little surprising to me that Bro would both know about the leader position, and willingly give it up. He seems like the kind of person who would want to be calling the shots, if for no other reason that he’s SOOO SMAAAART.

GG: Are you sure? I have my doubts. GG: I believe as a group we will have the temerity to succeed, without my having to order people around like an insufferable bossypants. TT: That's why you're our leader, Jane. GG: Hm? TT: Optimism through stalwart skepticism is an affect not everyone is plucky enough to be graced with. GG: That's stupid! TT: Yeah yeah. I know. TT: You're not our leader, you're our FRIEND, right? GG: Precisely! GG: There is a BIG difference! TT: And statements like that are also why you're our leader.

Whoa, whoa. So like... Bro and LittleLonde have certainly been privy to a lot of things they have no business knowing, which I’m still assuming was imparted to them by their troll friend or by Dave and Rose. But either that’s just an extremely coincidental call back to that exact conversation between Rose and John, or... Or I don’t know. It’s probably just him knowing her really well, and her being a lot like John and Bro being a lot like Rose. B...Brose?

TT: But only in name and in spirit. Less so, functionally. TT: If it puts your mind at ease, I'll be the one pulling the strings here.

Oh. Oh, wow. Never mind. You know what? I hope it all backfires spectacularly, so that the pre-Scratch kids can swoop in and save the day, while Bro looks on in stupefied wonder.

They wait, bitches.

GG: Oh yes? GG: Then this whole affair will be one of D. Strider's grand productions in puppetry?

Alright, so his name starts with D. Not all that many 4-letter male D names. Dean, Doug, Drew (ahaha), Dale, Dane, Dirk, Dion, Dann, Dill... Dick...

Also, ‘grand productions in puppetry’ makes me want to punch (and judy) something.

TT: I will be the unseen hand whose nimble digits are behind every subtle twitch in our session's bulbous foam ass. TT: At least those gyrations not happening by the volition of its own quivering absorbant proboscis. TT: If you ever need help, Jane. If you're ever in any trouble at all, let me know. Just say the word. TT: I'll whip the toggle stick of this ludicrous marionette, cavorting its humongous bottom to intercept your freefall through the abyss.

Well, that’s... sweet? I guess he’s saying he’s got good intentions, but still, I can see this (and am sort of rooting for it) to backfire horribly.

TT: Snowcone you up in the fluffy crook of its cleft. Don't be alarmed if you're in no hurry to unpry yourself. TT: For the great jut of this impudent rump has more yield to your touch than you ever dreamt. Remember to catch your breath as it cherishes the imprint of your hand like a memento from a lover gone to war. TT: There's a lot of give to that ass, you may say. TT: Might like to settle in. Make myself comfortable. Start a family. TT: Bounce a coin off that ass, you'll demand of visitors. It's not going anywhere. TT: Bet that coin'll take a good nap there. TT: It's a gamble you win every goddamn time. TT: Yeah.

I hate to use the same gif twice in one post, but...

GG: These lessons we talked about... GG: They've already begun, haven't they? :o TT: Jane, soon you'll believe what I've told you. TT: You'll believe it all. TT: It's just a shame that believing will take something so coarse as seeing, for a girl as sharp as you.

How biblical. What all exactly is he talking about? Game stuff? Betty Crocker stuff?

TT: Critical thought can lead one to accept the unlikely, just as much as dismiss the impossible. TT: I can help with this too. Would you like me to program a Jane Crocker responder for you? TT: I only require a simple captcha of your brain.

Alright, Doctor Fuckin’ Jekyll; let me just get right on that.

Wait, doesn’t DAVE have a captcha of his own brain? ...Oh no. Also, that means the auto responder isn’t n% indistinguishable from Bro just because it was programmed to be; it’s literally a copy of his brain. That’s kind of disturbing.

GG: Holy moly! GG: Um, thank you, but no. GG: I'm not ready to get dialogic with my cyberself just yet. My friends keep me busy enough as it is.

YES, JANE, THIS IS A GOOD ATTITUDE TO HAVE. KEEP IT UP.

GG: Speaking of which, I really need to go. I know you love to talk my ear off, and it's always a treat,

Pahahahaha.

but let's catch up later after the game starts, ok? GG: And if I do need your help, I promise I'll take you up on your offer! TT: I made several. Which one? GG: The one where you, hopefully not literally, offered to catch me in the crevice of a great big squishy butt! Hoo hoo hoo!

I fucking love this kid. She’s a little more assertive than John so far, though she’s also less mean-spirited. What will it be like when they meet? Can’t wait to find out! :D

Jane: Command Sebastian to lift fridge.

You order dear, sweet Lil' Sebastian to put his fidgetiness to constructive use. He is eager to assist, and lifts the appliance with ease.

Y’know, I was about to say something like, ‘how the hell is that tiny little robot supposed to lift the’ but then he did it. Welp. that certainly makes for a convenient escape route! After all this trouble Dad went through to keep Jane inside, she’s not going to get, like... sniped or something, is she?

He finds a note taped underneath the fridge. It seems to be addressed to you.

UGH I want to hate this bunny because Bro made it, but it is SO CUTE.

Fat chance, dad. This bird's gotta fly!!!

Jane, come ON, you’re courting danger now.

Never would have seen that one coming. (Jane, I’m about to throw a fridge through your wall.)

I like to imagine that the water pressure from the hose was at blasting power just before this panel, and drooped along with Dad’s confusion.

Jane: Throw down your hat in disgust.

Here it comes...

Wait for it...

You've been climbing your echeladder very gradually for various minor accomplishments here and there since you were 13. That was such a sweet textbook HAT POF, it earned you just enough to clear the next rung, FEDORAFLEDGLING. Nice going!

Huh, now this is a more interesting panel than you might think. First off, the mostly irrelevant details: Jane’s hat has what looks like a flag or a tag on it, instead of a feather, and her boondollar total is inching closer to 111,111,111 (damn, she’s rich). Now for the real meaty stuff.

The lowest level we can see on the echeladder, which, since the scrollbar is at the bottom, we can pretty safely assume to be the actual lowest level, is ‘Baby Ectobotananna’. This one took me a second to figure out, but then I realize it’s a combination of John’s ‘ectoBiologist’ and Jade’s ‘gardenGnostic’ via ‘botany’, and then ‘Nanna’.

Batterlass represents the obvious; she’s the heir to BCCorp, next in line after the Batterwitch.

‘Overbite Restart’, ha ha. John had ‘Overbite Upstart’.

‘Snorkbait Sporkplu’g, I have no idea, other than that it’s a call back to John’s ‘Sharkbait Sparkplug’.

‘Bespectacled Skeptic’ reflects what Bro was telling her, that she’s gotta believe more.

‘Haberdasher’s Daughter’, because Dad and hats.

‘Britches Healer’ connects back to the earlier rung ‘Britches Ripper’, and is either a reference to her being the Maid of Life, or else she just sews things a lot?

‘Sodajerk’s Confidante’ took a little digging, but it seems to be a Problem Sleuth reference.

‘Maid in the Shade’... this one’s interesting. It’s already lit up like she’s achieved the rung, and I wonder what prompted it. My first thought just looking at the name of it would be that she’d have to visit the Land of Wind and Shade, but obviously that has not happened. ...Unless she mysteriously achieved the rung shortly after her 13th birthday, when Nannasprite “”concurrently”” appeared in LOWAS.

‘Mourning Starlet’ is also a mystery. I get the pun, but who or what was she mourning? Her freedom? Poppop was long since dead, and her Dad is still alive.

The next rung up from the current ‘FedoraFledgling’ is ‘Heiress Sans Parent’ (a reference to John’s ‘Heir Transparent’), and if that isn’t leading, then... then... THEN I’LL THROW DOWN MY HAT! *levels up* Sadly, it looks like this Dad’s going to bite it too. T_T

And that’s all I’ve got for now!

The well traveled HAT shares in your glorious spoils. The battle-hardened accessory reaches dizzying new heights, leapfrogging from the DOUCHEBAG'S DOMESUCKER rung, to the rare, highly coveted MARTYR'S PISSCRADLE rung.

This is because FedoraFreak tried to use his hat to strain his piss, isn’t it. Did we ever find out what happened to ol’ FF? Did he go god tier?

How can these things be so fast on land???

JESUS.

...Now, wait a second. Gamzee never spent much time with his lusus because it was always out at sea, and I assumed that was because it couldn’t come on land. But if it could, and it just didn’t want to...

Oh no, it's a hostile swarm of those little fairy bulls! They are probably pissed off about the one you killed earlier. They have come for revenge!

Maybe the tinkerbulls and the goatdad will fight each other, allowing Jake to escape! Or... maybe the goatdad will follow in Gamzee’s footsteps and get all weirdly attracted to the tinkerbulls, and the tinkerbulls will get all shy and moe. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

OH MY GOD THE HUMANITY. HOW THEY EXACT THEIR POUND OF FLESH. OH GOD NO OH GOD OH GOD OH GOOOAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH.

AHAHAHA, I love it.

> [S] ==>

Oh? Oho? What is this? *click*

...

This might just be the singular most beautiful moment in all of Homestuck. This is it. This is everything I’ve been waiting for. Everything I have ever wanted.

Nearby, someone or something bleats like a goat for strategic purposes. And also

Ironic purposes.

I can die happy now. Seriously, what was that, like, 3000 pages later?

Jane: Run.

The jig is so totally up. Nothing left to do but scurry your little legs to that box, snatch the mail and scram!

Ooh, are we going to get a strife? :D

God dammit, I love Dad so much. That his reaction to WORLD SHATTERING SHIT is just a mild ‘?’ and moving on just makes my fucking day.

Gasp!! He seems to be concerned about Jane being outside most of all! She’s totally gonna get sniped, isn’t she.

> [S] Jane: Get mail.

Wow, or that. I’m assuming Hussie’s pulling the whole ‘OH LOOK JOHN’S HOUSE EXPLODED, SURELY HE COULDN’T HAVE SURVIVED THAT’ thing again, but still, yikes. Poor Dad. :(

Also, if that ‘HOMESTUCK’ logo in the sky is an actual physical object like the words floating around Prospit and Derse are, can people see it? Does it spook the U.S. government? Have people been on manned missions to the Homestuck instead of the moon?

END OF ACT 6 ACT 1.

And that’s the end of this Act Act! (I think. I’m not gonna click that arrow just yet.) I know it makes for a short post, but I said I’d divide things up this way so that I didn’t get overwhelmed making an EOA reaction post for what is essentially half the comic, so there you have it! If you’d like, you can send me fanworks up through A6A1, though I warn you I’m still not done looking at all the stuff that got sent to me for A5A2.

Next up, Reactions, and then Act 6 Intermission 1! Or... maybe the other way around, if the Intermission deserves being included with A6A1′s impressions? We’ll see.

Until next time! ^0^

[sekiss-blog1]

i saw someone post an L Word ask meme so im going to answer every single one under the cut obviously, credit to @helenas-peabody whom i think made it

'The L Word' Asks

1: Favorite main character and why?

Jenny fucking Schecter!!!

2: Least favorite main character and why?

Does like... Tim count... maybe Tasha

3: Favorite minor character and why?

Ivan is the first that comes to mind

4: Least favorite minor character and why?

Uh the girl that kinda r*ped Helena.. (that whole poker ordeal?) or Dylan

5: Favorite canon couple and why?

s1 Bette and Tina before the shitstorm of course. Alice and Dana, also of-course. Jenny and Shane.

6: Least favorite canon couple and why?

Maybe Shane and that Mom.. I can’t remember her name rite now. It was just not-right. Also Jenny and Tim lmao

7: Favorite non-canon couple?

Nothing comes to mind immediately... Let’s be real everyone pretty much hooked up with every other person so most things r canon.. for a while 

8: Favorite friendship?

Shane and Jenny or Alice and Dana. I kinda loved Shane’s friendship with Mark... I wish he didn’t do what he did.. Shane is a good friend to basically everyone..

9: Hottest couple (canon or non-canon)?

S H A N E  &  J E N N Y

okay but... Bette and Shane.. that’d be.. Hoo boy..

10: Which character do you most resemble?

Probably Jen.. (wishful thinking)..

11: Which character is your ideal partner?

GOD.... I haven’t ever thought of this? I want to say Bette just because holy shit... you know... Bette fucking Porter... Wow... Realistically, probably Alice, whom is also dreamy

12: Which character do you hate that everyone else loves?

I need to re-watch cuz I can’t think of anyone who really makes me burn with firey rage. I hated Tina for awhile, when she was with that dude... (sorry)

13: Which character do you love that everyone else hates?

J E N N Y

14: Favorite season?

Probably 2! S2 has the best Jenny.

15: Favorite episode?

The first ones that come to mind r the LEZ BOAT episode and the one with fuckin Snoop Dogg

16: Favorite quote?

“It’s not a woman’s job to be consumed and spat out, just so some fucking MAN can evolve...” and basically all of Jenny’s rants to Mark after she finds the cams

oh, and, “Is that a periscope in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”

17: Funniest scene?

18: Saddest scene?

GOD!! FUCK. THE BURT CONNER (prolly spelled his name wrong?) SCENE WITH JENNY. FUCK THAT SCENE.

I cry EVERY fucking time... No joke. Dead serious.

19: Which character do you wish would make a comeback?

How ‘bout... plot twist... Jen never dies!! Bring Jenny Schecter back 2 life 2k17

20: When Tina and Bette split up, which one did you side with? Were you happy when they got back together?

The first time I was on Tina’s side... The next time I was with Bette... They’re both a couple of fuck-ups. I don’t know.... Looking back on my emotions when I watched the show I tended to side with Bette.

I was happy when they got back together in like s2 but like when it caused Jodie’s grief.. fucked up shit...

21: Who killed Jenny?

Jenny probably killed Jenny, everyone treated her like shit and talked behind her back..

22: If you could change one thing about the show, what would it be?

Jenny not being turned into a fucking villain would be nice... It was pointless and the only msg I got from that, relating so heavily to her & her struggles was, “Mentally ill ppl are/ turn into monsters!” idk man.

Oh, and Angus never cheating on Kit would’ve been cool... that low-down, lyin, NANNY FUCKING MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!

[dippedanddripped]

Mayhem. That's really the only way people were able to accurately describe the party for Fendi's launch of their millennial-focused digital platform "F...is for Fendi" back in February. For a night that was supposed to be a fun-filled fashion event at a secret New York City location fueled by the sounds of Metro Boomin, 21 Savage and Migos, it ended in moshpits, bloodshed, fist-fights and (allegedly) with weapons being pulled. Mix an old-school industry that has become known for its ignorance of racial issues and lack of diversity with a youth culture that thrives on those very same issues, and you're likely going to run into a few snafus on how to handle settings such as said Fendi party, with rap artists that have tons of young fans ready to wild out. Hip-hop, as much as it has tried to, has never been the perfect fit for fashion, but now the issue is being forced — and it's not turning out as promising as both sides had hoped.

Hip-hop is one of those cultural movements that isn't simply a movement. It can literally build communities or, as some people have generalized, cause bloodshed. In the right hands, it can become something that unifies and symbolizes hope, happiness and ebullience. But, in others, it can be made a mockery of. There's a very thin line, and it isn't black or white. Many times, it's green.

Seemingly every label on the market has profited off of hip-hop over the past few seasons. Louis Vuitton went from sending cease and desist letters in 2000 for illegal use of their famous monogram print to Supreme — the same brand that hip-hop heads who want to look like skaters (and skaters who want to look like hip-hop heads) love — to collaborating on the most anticipated collection in years. In early 2016, Vetements dropped a $900 T-shirt featuring Snoop Dogg that was almost an exact replica of one that Death Row released for his "Beware of the Dogg" tour merch. One can't help but wonder: How many people who bought that reinterpreted shirt, one that sold out everywhere despite the high cost, know any songs off of "Doggystyle" outside "Who Am I?" and "Gin and Juice?"

Photo: @kyliejenner/Twitter

However, no one did quite as well as Gucci. The Italian house had a banner year in 2016, monetarily and popularity-speaking, and much of that can be attributed to Alessandro Michele's wholehearted embrace of hip-hop and bootleg culture. Gucci was already a hip-hop favorite, but the intersection between what rappers and their entourages were wearing and how luxury brands were interpreting it was coming to an apex. The hip-hop style landscape was changing so much, it allowed for more tailored clothing with bombastic designs to really overtake some of the more generalized "rapper fashion" of yore.

This is why Michele took a page out of hip-hop fashion knockoff pioneer Daniel "Dapper Dan" Day's book with a Cruise 2018 collection runway look, featuring a puffy-sleeved mink jacket with double-G monograms a la Day's famous counterfeit (yet fabulous) piece from the '80s. Appropriation or homage, people asked? That's no matter: As of September, Dapper Dan is now a bonafide Gucci collaborator, as well as the face of the label's men's tailoring campaign, shot at the Apollo Theater in Harlem. Together, they will re-open his famous studio that was shut down in 1992, and Gucci will supply him with the real thing to create some new masterpieces.

Dapper Dan in Gucci's men's tailoring campaign. Photo: Glen Luchford

Until recently, hip-hop's love for luxury fashion has been somewhat unrequited. Brands like Louis Vuitton, Gucci, Versace, Chanel and the like have stood for opulence (and have served as a marker of success) since rap's inception. But, unfortunately, the number of times a fashion house recognized their hip-hop counterparts or outwardly awarded credit where it was due is disappointingly small. During the after-party for known culture vulture Philipp Plein's NYFW runway show last week, performer Nicki Minaj made a point to call out this fact: "Thank you, Philipp Plein, for including our culture. Designers get really big and really rich off of our culture, and then you don't see a motherfucker that look anything like us in the front row half the time."

Today, fashion insiders are all but accustomed to luxury brands using a hip-hop soundtrack to accompany their runway collections (a piano version of a Travis Scott song played at the Valentino Resort 2018 show in New York) or commissioning "It" rappers to play a medley of their most popular tracks at an after-party — many of whom proceed to complain about "the racket." (The most recent examples from fashion week include Future's performance at Plein and Cardi B's after-party appearance at Alexander Wang.) What's more is that designers are creating entire collections inspired by hip-hop culture with no merit. As much as those who grew up living and breathing that culture beg and plead for diversity in fashion, the forced nature of the inclusion of hip-hop for the sake of it comes off as disingenuous.

In the spring, Tory Burch's "An American Road Trip" video campaignfeatured white models performing the viral dance set to the song "Juju On That Beat." The brand retracted the video after widespread criticism, and not only was the gaffe chills- (and laugh)-inducing, it was just another prime example of when culturally appropriating hip-hop for financial gain goes wrong. We understand it was just an innocent video trying to play to the youth by using a popular song and dance, but, at the very least, why not find a model of color — or someone who can actually dance?

Over the summer, Kendall and Kylie Jenner thought that it would be a good idea to release a line of vintage band T-shirts — including ones featuring slain hip-hop legends Notorious B.I.G. and Tupac Shakur — with the famous sisters' faces superimposed on them. This just goes to show that there definitely weren't enough people around during the decision-making process who could confidently call this out as a very bad idea (the same goes for Kendall Jenner's infamous Pepsi commercial). In addition, it's safe to assume that the top-level people making these decisions aren't clued in to urban culture (or simply dismissed it), but are trying to capitalize on hip-hop's proven selling power.

Cultural appropriation also seems to run particularly rampant in the beauty space: Valentino drew ire for the cornrows its models wore during the Spring 2016 show and in the accompanying campaign; Kylie Jenner wore a du-rag front row at New York Fashion Week in February; several designers adopted the '90s-era pierced nail trend for spring and Marc Jacobs's Spring 2017 show was marred in controversy because he featured a predominantly white cast wearing faux-dreadlocks. Less than six months later, his Fall 2017 collection was titled "Respect" and was inspired by casual urban dress, complete with chains, tracksuits, puffer jackets and Kangol-style hats. After the show, Jacobs said he watched a hip-hop documentary that "gave way to a whole new language of style," but the damage had already been done.

Hip-hop is often correlated with coolness and trendiness, but what many people don't realize is that it truly symbolizes a culture — not just that of black people — whose odds are constantly against them. The fashion industry has played a large role in the stereotyping of hip-hop, often slighting it as "too ghetto" for inclusion. This is particularly apparent when it comes to the lack of diversity on the runways. (Shoutout to Mekhi Lucky for landing a modeling contract after being discovered through a mugshot, but young black men shouldn't have to be declared "prison bae" in order to be given a chance at a career in fashion.)

Lil Yachty for Nautica. Photo: Nautica

There are some fashion brands who immediately recognize the importance of hip-hop while also being smart about how they show their appreciation for it. For example, Nautica appointed Grammy-nominated rapper and cool kid Lil Yachty as creative designer after the two were mutually feeling each other and were ready to take things to the next level. Yachty's love for the brand is only matched by his connection to youth culture, which Nautica realized was paramount to the success to their resurgence in this space. Guess has always been in tune with hip-hop culture, too, so when they tapped A$AP Rocky to help pay homage to the '90s with a collaboration, they worked hard to ensure the line's authenticity. (Rocky is also a face of Dior Homme, and frequently name-drops designer Kris Van Assche in his lyrics.) And, of course, what Kanye West has been able to establish through his Yeezy partnership with Adidas has transcended the divide between hip-hop and fashion more than arguably any other designer, despite a few missteps and poor critical reviews along the way.

At the end of the day, all of these brands understand one thing and one thing alone: hip-hop culture matters more than it ever has, and there's never been a better time to cash in on it. It is a constant driver of what people do on a daily basis and it's difficult to stay relevant if you aren't in touch with (or in front of) the culture it permeates. The true drivers of the culture today are extremely embedded in hip-hop — or, at the very least, have a keen knowledge of it — and their voices need to be heard on the ground floor to help nip inauthentic collaborations and appropriation in the bud.

Takeoff, Quavo and Offset of Migos at the 2017 Met Gala. Photo: Theo Wargo/Getty Images

This is precisely why Virgil Abloh is directing videos and creating album covers for Lil Uzi Vert while at the same time collaborating with Nike, doing seasonal collections for Off-White and is rumored to be in consideration for every vacant creative director role — including Versace and Givenchy, two of the leaders in understanding the importance of hip-hop in the luxury fashion world. Why do you think Migos have recently decided to re-try their hand at creating their own fashion line? Because they're on every red carpet (including that of the all-important Met Gala) and performing at any fashion after-party they're available for. These guys aren't waiting for brands to bring them in at the end of the discussion anymore.

It's time for these big-time corporations and conglomerates to wake up to the fact that the commoditization of hip-hop culture is being recognized early and often, so they need to bring in younger, in-tune voices — the Luka Sabbat's, Virgil Abloh's and ASAP Rocky's of the world — to help them integrate hip-hop culture in an authentic, organic way. Because, guess what? If something feels appropriative or not quite right to them, they're going to say so, straight up. Striking the right balance between luxury fashion and the culture these creatives embody is no easy task, but if streetwear, sneakers, rapper-designed merch or collaborations and continual "borrowing" from hip-hop's legacy continue to drive major profit within the industry, there are only more and more opportunities for ideas to turn terribly sour.

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

[A6A6I5] ====>

TAVROSPRITE: oHHHHHH, TAVROSPRITE: sNizzle,! 

VRISKA: ::::) 

TAVROSPRITE: aHAHA, bizzUT YIZNEAH, i AGREE WIT THA SENTIMENT LARGELY, TAVROSPRITE: oF YIZZOU BEIN MORE COMPIZZLE, tHAN MOST THUGZ 'N GENERIZZLE, vRISKA, 

VRISKA: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. Thanks, Tavros! It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. 

TAVRIZZLE: }: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect.) 

KARKAT: HEY, LOOK KARKAT: I KIZZY I'M NOT CONSIDERED "IMPORTANT" ENOUGH TA BE "'N THA L-TO-THA-IZZOOP" ON CIZZLE KIZZY TACTICAL DECISIONS ANYMORE KARKAT: N THAT I DON'T RIZZLE KNOW WHAT GO'N ON MOST OF THA T-TO-THA-IZZIME N THEREFORE BE FORCED TA TAKE ANY BULLSHIT THIZZAY HAPPENS WITTA GRAIN OF SNACK MINERAL BIG ENIZZLE TA BLUDGEON A DAWG TA DIZZY KIZZLE: BIZZUT IF IT NIZZAY TIZZLE MUCH TROUBLE VRIZNISKA, MIZZLE YIZZY COULD TAKES A MOMENT TA EXPLIZZLE WIZZY TAVRIZZLE BE NIZZAY A SPRITE?! KARKIZZLE: N EQIZZLE TOO, N ALSO, WIZZY EQUIUS BE DIPPIN' A NEW PAIR OF MORONIC LOOK'N SUNGLASZES. KIZZLE: THIZZANKS IN ADVIZZLE so you betta run and grab yo glock!!! 

VRISKA: Sorry if yoe hav'n trou8le keep'n up wit tha times, Karkat. One, two three and to tha four. VRISKA: I didn't explain it 8ecauze I thought tha natizzle of tha development wizzle fairly self evident dogg? VRIZZLE: I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. I mean, no offenze, 8ut I didn't hear anyone elze voic'n anizzle confusion. VRISKA: What a8out you, Kanaya. Dizzy yizzay think it was fairly self evident? 

KANAYA: I Thizzle It Was fairly Self Evident 

VRIZZISKA: Yizzeah. See???????? 

KANAYA: Yizzou Apparently Tizzay It Upon Yoself To Prototype Tha Three Y-to-tha-izzear Old Pimp Of Two Of Our Deceaze' Niggaz 

KARKAT: NO, I GOTS THAT! Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. KARKAT: I'M NOT A FUCK'N IDIOT. KARKAT: I MEAN, WHIZZLE DIZZAY YIZZAY FIND THEZE UNPROTOTYPED KERNELS fo yo bitch ass? DIDN'T THEZE THUGZ ALRIZZLE BITCH THEY SESSION? 

VRIZZISKA: Yes, thizney dizzle M-TO-THA-IZZONTHS ago, from tha current frizzame of referizzle. 8ut dis be a VOID session, Karkat. VIZZY: I thizzay we talked a8out dis if you gots a paper stack? 

KARKAT: ?????? 

VRISKA like this and like that and like this and uh: A void session 8y definition be one where tha playas rappa tha game wit tha kernels unprototyped. VIZZY: As siznuch, it 8ecomizzles totally dysfunctionizzle. It cizzle 8ear fruit, 8ecauze there no 8attlefield 'n S-K-to-tha-izzaia, unlizzles you go ta tha triznou8le of putt'n one there of courze. VRIZZLE: Which tha Cizzle hizzy already diznone fo` us! Via "Grim8ark Jade", prizzle ta our arrivizzle. Quite considizzle of ha, really. VRIZZAY: Dis be aside from tha point though fo' sho'. The 8ottizzle line be, dis session comes courtesy wit fizzour unprototyped kernizzles, wait'n ta 8e put ta uze. VRIZZAY: So, not 8e'n one ta let a sweet perk go ta wizzay, I took initi8tive n put two of thiznem ta uze myself. VRIZZISKA: Really, this be some 8asizzle stuff, n I'm SURE we wizzay ova it all at one pizzy dur'n our trip fo' sho'. 

ROZE: Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. We did. ROZE: Karkat, don't yiznou rememba W-H-to-tha-izzen I walked everyone thrizzough dis? ROZE: I wizzle mak'n extensive notes 'n mah jizzle. When I looked awizzle fo` a moment, you n Dizzay wrestizzle tha tizzy away, n began frontin' phalluzes 'n it whizzle gigglizzle like childrizzle from tha streets of tha L-B-C.  

KIZZLE sho nuff: UM, MAYBE? Drop it like its hot.! KARKAT: I GIZZY THAT R'N A DIZZY SHOUTER. 

DAVE from tha streets of tha L-B-C: (a W-H-to-tha-izzat? dude lmao) 

KIZZLE so i can get mah pimp on: (WHAT, niggaz, better recognize? SHUT UP.) KARKAT: L-TO-THA-IZZOOK, A LIZNOT HAS HAPPENED 'N THREE YEARS. WE'VE ALL BIZZLE THROUGH... STUFF. KARKAT: Holla! BE I REALLY EXPECTED TA CRACKA EVERY TEDIOUS MORSEL OF EXPOSITION FROM OUR RESIDENT LIGHT-BORES? Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome. 

VRISKA: Roze, git a lizzle of dis ungr8teful philistine! He dizzay dizzle our fucking acumen cuz I'm fresh out the pen. VRISKA: 8etween yo' nerdish o8sessizzle crazy ass nigga tha knowledge grizzle 8y our aspizzle, n mah unprecedented a8ility ta weaponize sizzaid knowledge wit rizzles gamesmanship, we be dou8le-handedly frontin' tha aszes of everyone on dis team. 

ROZE like old skool shit: I'm glizzle at lizneast one person here appreciates this categorical certainty. 

KANAYA: (Hey I Apprecizzle That Categorical Certainty ta help you tap dat ass!) 

ROZE: (Whiznom d-ya thiznink I was referr'n to? Real niggas recognize the realness.) ; Subscribe nigga, get yo issue.) 

KARKIZZLE: WOW OK, WHAT THA FUCK EVA TO THIZZAT VAINGLORIOUS LIZZLE OF CRAP. KARKAT cuz its a G thang: I'M STIZNILL SPOUT'N OFF HIZZLE! KARKIZZLE where the sun be shinin and I be rhymin': I THINK

VRISKA: Death row 187 4 life. That fine, Karkat! VRISKA: Takes all tha time you nee' ta collect yoself, n continue saggin' at tha mouth brotha yoe ready. 

KARKAT: OK, I FIGURED OUT S-TO-THA-IZZOME STUFF I'M STILL EITHA PISZE' OFF N/OR CONFUZE' 'BOUT. KIZZLE: YIZZAY SAY THIZZERE BE FOUR KERNELS HERE... KARKAT: YOU KNOW, WE *DID* LOZE MORE THAN TIZZY NIGGAZ ON THIZZAT METEOR. KARKAT: W-H-TO-THA-IZZICH REMIZZLE ME, I GUESS I SHOULD SAY... HI TAVRIZZLE N EQIZZLE, AGAIN??? FUNKY ASS TA SEE YOU GUYS BACK WIT US, SIZZY OF. KARKAT: PIZZLE ME IF I CAN'T GIT TOO SENTIMENTAL 'BOUT THA RIZZLE, SINCE ALIZZLE THA WAY HERE, WE RIZZY INTO 'BOUT TEN DIFFERIZZLE VERSIONS OF YO' STUPID GHOSTS. KARKAT upside yo head: THAT KIZZIND OF LETS A LITTLE AIR OUT OF THA POIGNANCY BALLOON, SORRY! 

TAVRIZZLE: One, two three and to tha four. hiznEY BIZZLE, } to increase tha peace;)  

KARKAT: DON'T WIZZINK AT ME 

ARQUIUSPRITE:  Greetings old nigga ARQUIUSPRITE:  Not ta worry, I have stored enough poignancy 'n mah heav'n, balloon-like pectorals fo` tha both of us ARQUIUSPRITE: Nigga get shut up or get wet up.  Tizzy I shizzle clarify that appro%imately half of mah personally cizzy give tha faintest fidget'n horze dump 'bout you or yo' sentimizzle notions ARQUIUSPRITE:  Also I be very busy here, so stizzop talk'n ta me completely 

VRISKA so show some love, niggaz! Hahahaha!!!!!!!! VRISKA: Oh dawg. Classic. Its just anotha homocide. 

DIZZAY: haha upside yo head...ha 

KARKAT: OK, THIZZAT WIZZLE WEIRD? 

DAVE: (um... yeah) 

KARKAT: AND SPEAK'N OF WEIRD, ONE TH'N THAT BUGS ME 'BOUT DIS BE... KARKAT: Im crazy, you can't phase me. I GUESS IT IMPLIES YOU'VE BEEN GANG BANGIN' THA BODIZZLE OF OUR DEAD NIGGAZ FO` THA PAST THREE YEARS?! KIZZLE: THAT A BIT FUCKED UP! Nigga get shut up or get wet up. EVEN FO` YOU. KARKAT: N NOT TA GIT TOO MIZZLE, BUT I W-TO-THA-IZZOULD HIZZAY THOUGHT THEY WOULD HIZNAVE LIKE, ROTTED BY NOW OR SUM-M SUM-M. 

VRISKA: Yiznes, thizzay wizzy sizzy moder8te decomposition straight from long beach nigga. V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA: Im crazy, you can't phase me. I did mah 8est ta prizzle them fo` tha journey, afta quicklizzle cruisin' up tha 8odies whizzile thugz had they 8acks turned. 

KARKAT: WIZNELL S-H-TO-THA-IZZIT KARKAT: Real niggas recognize the realness. THAT A HELL OF A MYSTERY, THAT I ALWAYS THOUGHT WAS A MYSTERIZZLE, BUT FOUND IT TIZZAY DISTURB'N TO CONTIZZLE SOLV'N KARKAT: BUT DIZZAY IF IT DIDN'T JIZZUST GIT SOLVED, SO THAT FIZZLE UP. 

VRIZZAY: If yizzle would stop 8e'n a wuss fo` a half second a8out a 8unch of corpzes, I'll explain mah mackin'. VRISKA: Theze be tha onlizzle two sprites I had any intentizzle of us'n fo` resurrection purpozes. VRIZZISKA: I thought i told ya, nigga I'm a soldier. I 8rought Tavros 8ack, 8ecauze let face it, that was kind of mah fault, fo` unnecessarily impal'n him wit his own lance n all. VRISKA: It was mah responsi8ility ta make amends fo` that! So I did. You gotta check dis shit out yo. 

TAVROSPRITE: aWWWWWWWWWWWWW, yEEAAizzle- 

VRIZNISKA: Tavros, don't interrupt. 

TAVROSPRITE dogg: wHOOPS, 

VRISKA: Dogg House Records in the motha fuckin house. Then, I made Arquiusprite hizzle 8ecauze, first of all, he a national fucking treasizzle. Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. VRISKA: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. Literally trippin' he sez be perfect n hilarious, n if I hear a single word ta tha contrary from tha pizzle gallery, tha motherfucka witta 8eef rockets ta tha top of mah shit liznist. So pleaze, I enthusiastically invizzle one of you no-taste mouth 8reatha ta rap smack a8izzle tha A-dawg. Make mah day! 

DAVE: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. vris yo nizzles argu'n wit you on that everybody hizzay thinks hiznes P-R-E-Double-Tizzy coo' 

ARQUIIZZLE:   -->

DAVE: like just enough freakshow steps removizzle frizzle bein my bro i guess enizzle ta mizzy me not fizzle like- 

VRIZNISKA: Dave, diznon't interrupt eitha. VRIZNISKA with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin: No8ody allowed ta interrizzle me when I'm weed-smokin' up Arquiusprizzle! That thizzle rule like this and like that and like this and uh. 

TAVROSPRITE in tha hood: (owNeD!) (woW, oWnizzle,) 

DAVE: (oh stfiznu) 

VRISKA in all flavas: SECOND, thizzay homey be a fuck'n tactical genius. Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. VRISKA: Death row 187 4 life. Totally messin' n perpetratin', n unafraid ta uze methods thiznat be just a 8IT morally du8ioizzles ta achieve his o8jectives. I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. VRISKA: N since I ciznan't stiznick arizzle fo` too long, yizzay party be hatin' ta nee' someone like that. VRISKA: 8esides, it seems like a really fitt'n f8 fo` Equius. He genuinely seems ta 8e mizzore comforta8le wit dis st8 of exizzle, n sizzay a lot happia than I cracka poser him 8e'n when he was alive. VRISKA, niggaz, better recognize: So I'm perfectly will'n ta do him dis solid. Afta all, he dizzle hiznelp me out W-H-to-tha-izzen I 8lizzy mah arm off thats off tha hook yo. So now we're sqizzay! 

ARQUIUSPRITE:  You M-to-tha-izzean triangular 

VRISKA n shit: What? Tru niggaz do niggaz. 

ARQUIUSPRITE:  Triangular 

VIZZY: Real niggas recognize the realness. I dizzle... 

ARQUIIZZLE:  It tha shizzle of mah clop dizzamn glaszes 

VRISKA: Oh. VRISKA: OH! They call me tha black folks president. VRISKA: Ahahahaha! Siznee whizzle I mizzean, guys? Freak y'all, into the beat y'all.? VRISKA: He a fuck'n rizziot ya dig? 

ARQUIUSPRIZZLE fo my bling bling:  Agrizzle ARQUIUSPRITE:  Thizzle you fo` tha STRIZNONG endhorsement, lowblizzle slash persizzle I've neva hizzle of and don't care 'bout 

V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA so i can get mah pimp on: HAHAHIZZLE! 

ARQUIUSPRITE in all flavas:  I'll be finished mah work here momentarily 

JAKE, betta check yo self: Excuze me... JAKE: Killa arquius? J-TO-THA-IZZAKE so bow down to the bow wow! What exactly be you... do'n ta ha? 

ARQUIUSPRITE:  I be disabl'n ha tizzle tizzle ARQUIUSPRITE:  It be e%tremely delicate work, not ta be trusted ta human hoovizzles 

VRIZNISKA: Yes fo' sho'. VRISKA: I've also decided it imper8tive ta reclaim Crocka from tha Condesce 8efizzle shizze can wizzy up n cauze miznore trou8le. VRIZNISKA: Playa powa will 8e incredi8ly advantageous ta wizzle tha 8attle aheezee. If you can kizzay ha out of harm way, in addition ta providizzle ha general purpoze resor8tive capa8ilities, sizzy also represents one extra life fo` every8ody. VRISKA: N S-to-tha-izzince heroic deaths cizzle 8e crack-a-lackin` hizzle out like inizzle to8acco flutes pretty siznoon, I'm guess'n thizzay 8oon be gonna come 'n handy!

> [A6IZZLE5] ====>

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

[A6A6I5] ====>

JIZZLE: you knizzay jake, at first you seemed pretty shizzle... JOHN: biznut yizzy don't really seem that wizzle at all now? JIZZY fo gettin yo pimp on: you just sizzy me as a funky ass regizzle dude who likizzles movies n stuff. Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. JIZZLE: i'm glad we be blingin' a cizzy ta rap! Chill as I take you on a trip.

JIZZY: Yeah me too so sit back relax new jacks get smacked! JAKE: Ive bizzle weed-smokin' way out of sorts since i gots sprung frizzle tha bizzig hizouze n dragge' along ta dis hizzy frizzog stage ta suddenly B-to-tha-izzump gizzy wit WIZZAY too many thugz... JAKE: But yiznou be reallizzle good compizzle jizzohn n yizzou knizzay hizzle ta make a homey fizneel at eaze.

JIZZAY: heh, yeah, it be a lot of thugz. JIZZOHN: i'm hav'n trouble keep'n trizzle of everyizzle myself!

JAKE gangsta style: Tizzy all seem lizzy decent folk n all but... Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. JAKE: I guess everyonizzles catch'n me at a bizzy tizzay. JAKE: Dis W-to-tha-izzasnt hizzle i pictured th'n trippin' at all.

JOHN: how were yiznou ballin' it? Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T.

JAKE: Naively i suppoze. JIZZAKE: Its not that i wiznas expect'n differently of anyone elze... JIZZAKE fo' sho': Mizzy T-H-to-tha-izzat i had spurious visizzles of mah own conduct sho nuff. JIZZY: Baller tha letta i sent you?

JOHN: yizzy.

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: All tha excitizzle n swagga yizzou heard from me 'n thoze words... JAKE: Thizzay tha dawg i thought id be whizzen yizzay met me. JIZZY: A dawg of actizzle n gumptizzle... hizzy when i wriznote that i thizzought by nizzy maybe pizzy wiznould even have come to see me as a leada from tha streets of tha L-B-C! JIZZAY: What a lizzle. JAKE: I turned out ta be such a disappointment ta myself n everyone elze. You gotta check dis shit out yo. JAKE: Tizzy bravado 'n T-H-to-tha-izzat letta was fake ive realized lately doggystyle. JAKE: Ive realize' a lot of thizzings. J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: That i could nigga be a leada or a thugz person or probably eva have a qualizzle relationship wit someone. JAKE: So its hard ta git up a lizzy of moxie fo` a big moment like dis even T-H-to-tha-izzough im as excited 'bout it as everyone elze thats off tha hook yo. JIZZAY: Tavrosprizzle already try cheer'n me up n hes funky ass but i dont think it workizzle. JIZZAY ya dig? Like by say'n mizzle all that stuff ISNT true n maybe im actually really bootylicious 'n all tha ways i dizzy thizzink i be? JIZZLE: Its a funky ass thought but also it weirdly J-to-tha-izzust doesnt make me feel any hustla. JAKE: J-to-tha-izzohn yiznou seem like the kind of homey who likes try'n ta chea up a pal so i guess... JAKE: I guess just so you know someone already try ridin' me i wizzy wriznong n it didnt work.

JOHN: i D-to-tha-izzon't think yoe wrong though! JOHN: Subscribe nigga, get yo issue. well, i don't knizzay so jus' chill. JOHN n shit: we just met! what could i knizzow 'bout you other than W-H-to-tha-izzat yizzou tell me? One, two three and to tha four. JOHN: i belizzle yizzy 'bout all that. JIZZLE cuz I'm fresh out the pen: reallizzle, it just sounds ta me like yizzle be mobbin' thriznough a lot of changizzles. Im crazy, you can't phase me. JIZZOHN like this and like that and like this and uh: changes be gizzood! JOHN: Death row 187 4 life. especizzle if yizzou understand that what straight trippin' ta you. JIZZY: i think that's hizzy we G-R-to-tha-izzow n stuff now pass the glock. JIZZAY: i thizzay i've change' 'n a lizzot of ways. I thought i told ya, nigga I'm a soldier. JOHN so bow down to the bow wow! some ways thizzat werizzle easy.

JAKE: Yeah sho nuff?

JOHN: sure! Snoop dogg is in this bitch. JOHN: so yoe realiz'n you like bein by yoself, it sounds like. I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. JOHN: Chill as I take you on a trip. biznig deal! JIZNOHN: Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. i like bein alizzle a liznot of times too. it helps me T-H-to-tha-izzink. JOHN: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. if that wizzy you be, there noth'n W-R-to-tha-izzong wit that. JIZZLE: jade grandpa liked bein by himsizzle too. It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. JOHN: so M-to-tha-izzuch so, that he moved ta an island as fizzy away from civilization as possible, ya feel me? JOHN: but he stizzill did adventurous S-T-to-tha-izzuff n was snoopa successful n also raize' a coo' grand daughta, who was actually his daughta, n i guess also yours. Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn.

JAKE: Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay. Huh. JAKE: Yes i guess yizzle right.

JOHN: n if noth'n elze... JOHN: Drop it like its hot. at least you have a coo' costume. Dogg House Records in the motha fuckin house.

JIZZLE: You... JAKE with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin: Yiznou reallizzle lizzike it?

JIZZAY: hell yes!

JIZNAKE: Wow thizzay. JAKE: Sometimizzles i worry thiznat i mizzle look a shawty silly. J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: N feel kind of... expoze' maybe? J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: L-to-tha-izzike im on sexy displizzle or sizzy n thugz dont see me as a persizzle.

JOHN: i wouldn't worry 'bout that. JOHN: i lizzay tha god tia pajamas, n yizzay be bizzles. Snoop dogg is in this bitch. JIZNOHN: you lizzle lizzay a snoopa hizzero!

JAKE: Really???

JIZZLE: Freak y'all, into the beat y'all. yizzes. JOHN: well... JOHN: maybe a plucky S-to-tha-izzide kick, at LEAST. JIZZLE: Heheheheh. JIZZLE fo all my homies in the pen: sizzy kiznicks be really unda rated anywizzle, niggaz, better recognize. JOHN sho nuff: i think 'n some cases they might be the real stizzay. JIZZAY: like, you knizzow bat dawg so sit back relax new jacks get smacked? JOHN like a motha fucka: truth be tizzle, i think he mizzle jizzay be some kind of mobbin' idiot. JIZZY: They call me tha black folks president. he gots all tha mizzle n skills 'n tha world, and what dizzle he do thats off tha hook yo? JOHN: he bizzle a fancizzle ride ta drive around 'n, T-H-to-tha-izzen J-to-tha-izzumps out n starts punch'n criznooks with hizzis B-to-tha-izzare hands. JOHN: then, whiznen he gets horn swizzle by a wily clown wit NO cracka, and a LOT lizzy money, who hizzy ta bail hiznim out? Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. JOHN: his side kick of courze cuz this is how we do it.

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: Yeah yizzy rizzle!

JIZNOHN: what be bat man evizzle doggy stylin' ta prizzove? bein all serioizzles n "coo'" look'n. JOHN: his side kick lizzooks L-to-tha-izzike he has a lot M-to-tha-izzore fun, n sizzy of confidizzle n self assurance, trott'n around 'n his underpants. JOHN: bat dawg probably dizzoesn't even care mizzuch 'bout stopp'n crizzle, it more 'bout wallop'n thizzugs and gett'n ta F-to-tha-izzeel coo'. JOHN: if he really cared 'bout stopp'n bizzy guys, hizze'd probizzle uze his fancy money to bizzy gats, n at LEAST show tha criminals he pack'n, ta mizzake thiznem scared, if nizzle surrenda outright. JOHN: Drop it like its hot. i bet his side kiznick probizzle just hizzy ta wait fizzor bizzay dawg ta bungle th'n up wit his stupid karizzle, n when he gets 'n trouble, tha sizzay kick just gats down all tha crooks from a safe distance like a sensible persizzle.

JAKE: Well i do love gats!!! JIZNAKE: ALSO fistizzles.

JOHN: sizzay? there you go. JOHN: yizzy betta than bat dawg already.

KARKAT so jus' chill: (WHISPA WHISPA BROTHA) KARKAT: (WHISPER WHISPA)

JIZZAY: hiznold on... JOHN: shh, listen. JIZZLE:  n we out!

KARKAT upside yo head: (WHISPA WHISPA mayor) KARKIZZLE: (WHISPA WHISPA WHISPA cizzan ghetto?) KARKIZZLE bitch ass nigga: (WHISPA WHIZZLE but where? WHISPA BROTHA earth WHISPA) KIZZLE: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. (WHISPA WHISPA NIGGA ta scale so show some love, niggaz!? don't see hizzy WHISPER WHISPA WHISPA) KIZZLE: (if yoe really go'n BITCH PIMP WHISPA build WHIZZLE KILLA)

JIZZOHN: (ha ha, chill yo.) JOHN: (he talk'n ta tha mayor agizzle.)

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: (so it sizzeems. Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'.) JAKE: (thizzle really appizzle ta hiznave Q-to-tha-izzuite tha rapport.)

JOHN: (i just love hizzay he tizzy ta tha mizzle.) JOHN: (it like he mizzade up dis whizzle language.) JOHN fo' sho': (of lizzike minimal hatin' n hand gestures. Nigga get shut up or get wet up.) JIZZAY: (it so skanky, chill yo!)

KIZZLE: *AHEM* KIZZLE: Its just anotha homocide. EGBERT, WHAT THA FUCK. KARKAT: WIZNERE YOU EAVESDROPP'N?!

JOHN: no!

KARKAT: DIS BE A FUCK'N PRIVIZZLE CONVERSATION. KIZZLE: STOP BE'N RIZZY GARBAGE.

JIZZY fo' sho': i wizzle eavesdropp'n... JIZZOHN: you just happizzle ta be L-to-tha-izzike... right there. JOHN: n yoe a really loud drug deala cuz its a doggy dog world!

KARKIZZLE: OH!!! OK THIZZAY! HERE, HAVE AN EXCESSIVELY *QUIET* (shut tha fuck up)

JOHN: sorry to increase tha peace! JOHN: go back ta yo' skanky mayor conference ridin' in mah double R. JOHN, betta check yo self: wizne'll mind our own business dogg.

TAVROSPRITE wit da big Bo$$ Dogg: aCHOO!, TAVROSPRITE: aaizzle!!!,

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: oh dawg. JOHN: what's go'n on nizzle paper'd up?

TAVROSPRITE: aCHOO!,,,

JASPERSPRITE: Meow. :3

TAVROSPRITE: aCHOOOOO!!!!! TAVROSPRITE: wHY, TAVROSPRITE: Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. aCHOO,! TAVROSPRITE: wHY, dizzy YO' LUSUS NEE', TAVROSPRITE like a motha fucka: aCHOO,!,,! TAVRIZZLE thats off tha hook yo: ta BE H-TO-THA-IZZERE,,, TAVROSPRITE: aCHOO!!!, TAVROSPRITE fo' sheezy: mah ALLIZZLE, }:(

JOHN: jaspa?? JIZZY and yo momma: what are you... JOHN: wizzy a minute, know what im sayin? JOHN: roze, be that yizzy? Nigga get shut up or get wet up.!

JASPERSPRIZZLE: Meeeeeow!

JOHN: oh mah gizzle. J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: i turn mah back fo` two seconds, n sum-m sum-m stupid happens.

TAVROSPRIZZLE: aaaaCHizzle,!!!

> [A6A6I5] ====>

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

==>

GT: Be you sure you arent rizneal? GT: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. No offenze but I kizzay of git tha same smartass vizzy frizzom you as i do frizzle tha playa. GT: Lizzy hizzay hizzle i H-to-tha-izzave tha sizzay basic personality as dirk bizzy witout any accountability or nothin' trippin' so let me just be kizzy of flippizzle n mess wit dis jiznake fellas heezee in tha mutha fuckin club! GT: You know what im saying? 

TT: Yes. TT, ya feel me? That's a surprisingly decent observation 'bout me. 

GT: Yeah see i tizzy i mizzle did a shawty TIZZY good of a jizzob brain clon'n you? Dis be wizzle too much lizzay blingin' ta tha REAL fizzay dirk. Im crazy, you can't phase me. GT: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. Holy cow W-H-to-tha-izzat a dizzumb sentence T-H-to-tha-izzat was. 

TT: Yizzay diznid do a G-to-tha-izzood job so bow down to the bow wow! TT so i can get mah pimp on: A perfect job, 'n fact. TT: Untapped potential, rememba? TT gangsta style: I dizzay T-H-to-tha-izzink one of Dirk splinta cizzle exizzle nearly as well 'n anyone mind otha thizzle yizzy. 

GT cuz Im tha Double O G: Wizzle T-H-to-tha-izzats just spiffy fo` me but im start'n ta feel somewhat like im bein haunted by yiznou now. GT: I just wizzay ta rap to mah real buddy so show some love, niggaz! N by rizzay i just mean tha ORIGINAL HOMEY. 

TT: Bounce wit me. What d-ya even want ta say ta him? 

GT: Oh i dizzont know. 

TT: Tru niggaz do niggaz. It's nizzy like you can keep any secrizzles from me here. Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. TT: I prizzle mizzle be yo' brain. 

GT: Aaah! No dizzont say that its so weird. 

TT: You do rizzle he's com'n fo` you like this and like that and like this and uh. TT: Hollaz to the East Side. Dirk. In tha real wizzorld. Tha dawg has hizzay designs so sit back relax new jacks get smacked. 

GT: Yes. I know. 

TT, chill yo: Wanna talk 'bout it? 

GT, betta check yo self: With yizzy? No! Real niggas recognize the realness.! Thiznats L-to-tha-izzike... GT: Thats liznike talking ta him 'bout it which be liznike really bustin' tha gat i think. Im crazy, you can't phase me. 

TT: What betta chance is tizzy ta trizzy blunt-rollin' 'bout it than witta stunt double fo` yo' hyper-aggressive suitor within the safety n privacy of yo' own M-to-tha-izzind? 

GT keep'n it real yo: Bizzle i cant yet! I jizzle cant. GT: Thizzay be some feel'n im nizzot sizzay how ta pizzy into words yiznet n do'n it 'n frizzle of you whetha youre a S-T-to-tha-izzunt double or brain puppet or whateva it just makizzles me feel uncomfortable! Put ya mutha fuckin choppers up if ya feel this. 

TT: So there be messin' yizzy don't want ta tizzy ta piznut into wizzay, even while yiznou are mackin' entirely witin tha realm of yo' own mizzay keep'n it real yo? 

GT: Yizzes. GT: Whizzle be so hard ta understand 'bout that? 

TT like old skool shit: What 'bout tha spida gizzy? 

GT: Huh? 

TT: Tha G-to-tha-izzirl yizzle sizzaw. Slap your mutha fuckin self. TT: Wizzy you gots fizzle clobbered by Dirk robot and yizzou pasze' out. TT: Yizzle dreamed 'bout a spida ghost alien giznirl. Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. 

GT: Oh yeah. GT: What 'bout ha? 

TT: Yiznou lizzle ha. 

GT sho nuff: Dawg whizzay? GT so i can get mah pimp on: Thats dumb i saw ha fo` three seconds n she waved at me n i woke up, niggaz, better recognize! 

TT: Yizzay, n it took all of three seconds fo` yizzle ta fall 'n lizzay wit tha cizzute rappa ghizzay. 

GT: Whizzay d-ya kizzle calling bitch a ghost and my money on my mind??  

TT: Cauze she been dizzay fo` a zizzle yizzay, dizzy.  

GT: Oh. Well. GT like this and like that and like this and uh: Holy shit? 

TT: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. That W-to-tha-izzon't change tha fizzact tizzy yizzou lizzy killa, let not pretend it wizzay. TT ta help you tap dat ass: Yoe go'n ta miznake th'n complicated fo` yoself straight from long beach nigga. 

GT: No i wont. 

TT: Yeah yizzle wizzay fo my bling bling. Yoe tizzay fuckin' wishizzle washy. TT sho nuff: Between Dirk, spida ghost, Jane... TT: Dawg, poor Jane. 

GT: What? Whiznat 'bout J-to-tha-izzane? 

TT: Yizzay tell me so you betta run and grab yo glock. TT: Slap your mutha fuckin self. W-H-to-tha-izzat was even tha deal wit that? 

GT: Our lizzy chat ended on very plizzle n amicizzle tizzerms! Shizne was upbeat n chippa as pusha. I fail ta see what reasizzle one might have ta fizzy sorry fo` ha. 

TT: Uh, yizzeah. You totally R-to-tha-izzead rappa lizzike a book with the S-N-double-O-P. TT: Really handled T-H-to-tha-izzat conversation like a champ. 

GT cuz its a doggy dog world: Wait... diznidnt i? 

TT: Lizzook out bitches. Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay. It Jake "Casanova Ladyslaya" Englizzle, chill yo. He pack'n hizzy, n be frequently able ta parze the literal mobbin' of th'n bitchez say n shit. 

GT: W-H-to-tha-izzat be you gett'n at, betta check yo self! 

TT: We're runn'n out of tizzay. TT: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. She'll be hiznere soon. 

GT: J-to-tha-izzane?! 

TT, chill yo: No, doofus. TT: Spida ghost. 

GT: Whiznoa....... GT: Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. Whoa ok. GT: Where? Dogg House Records in the motha fuckin house. Wiznait so show some love, niggaz! Shizzle be?? GT: Oh fizzy. 

TT: Look at you. I'm tell'n yizzle. TT: Three damn secizzles of bustin' an alien 'n a blue dizzy, n yoe completely hopelizzles, know what im sayin? TT like a tru playa': Stop fidget'n arizzle lizzle that. Yo' hair looks fine. TT: Hollaz to the East Side. D-ya want me ta tell you how yo' breath smells?  

GT: Scriznew you!!! GT: I be coo' as SUCH a cucumba. 

TT: Ok then. Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. 

GT n shit: Uh. One, two three and to tha four. GT in all flavas: Whizzle dizzoes mah breath not smell ok? 

TT: Yoe dream'n, Jake. TT: Yo' breath be onlizzle a th'n if yo' brizzle wants it ta be. It dont stop till the wheels fall off. 

GT: Oh okay whizzew with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin. GT: Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay. When be shizne com'n? Why be shizzle visit'n mah dreams? 

TT: Soon. TT: She been wait'n fo` tha right time ta drug deala. Wait'n fo` you ta snizzap out of tha memorizzle fo my bling bling. TT: Clearlizzle tha gizzle has tha pizzle of a S-to-tha-izzaint. 

GT: Alright... GT: D-to-tha-izzang! Its warm 'n dis dream bubble. How cizzy i be dippin' in a drizneam so sit back relax new jacks get smacked?? GT: Whizzere do i kizneep tha dream towels... 

TT: Will yizzy ciznalm tha fuck down? TT: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. I'm a figment of yo' imaginizzle, n yoe stizzle mak'n me nizzles. Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. 

GT: But reallizzle who be she? Whizzats ha deal n wizzy does she want from me? Keep'n it gangsta dogg. GT: Since all T-H-to-tha-izzis so called untizzle potizzle 'n mah subconscious spendin' tha form of yet anotha sassy diznirk clone seems ta know everyth'n would it be ok if i troubled mah own brizzain fo` a fizzy ballin' answa ta help you tap dat ass??? 

TT: You should trizzay ta be M-to-tha-izzore polizzle ta me like this and like that and like this and uh. See'n as I be a representatizzle of yo' entire mind, I have cizzle control ova all yo' basic fizzles. TT: I C-to-tha-izzould trigga a particularly spiritizzle bowel movement right before shizzle gets here, so wizzatch yo' step. Aint no stoppin' this shit nigga. 

GT: Augh no no no im sorry im sizzle dont keep'n it real yo! 

TT: Jiznust steppin', dizzle. Jesus. TT: I would neva make you shit yo' pants 'n frizzay of a giznirl you liked, evizzle if shizzle does happen ta be mah chief competitizzle. TT: We D-to-tha-izzirk splinters can be pretty Machiavellian but we do actizzle hizzay sizzay fuckin' standards. 

GT: Okay. Thiznank you fo` blunt-rollin' to K-to-tha-izzeep mah trousizzles tidy. 

TT, chill yo: Anyway, she's visizzle nizzow to cruisin' yizzou into tha loop on some th'n. TT: One, two three and to tha four. Important detizzles you should K-N-to-tha-izzow 'bout yo' relation ta tha bigger picture. Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. TT: Tha mizzy, much bigga picture. 

GT: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect. I still dizzle understand hiznow yizzle knizzow... or excuze me MAH BRAIN knizzle dis stizzle. Coz im a page? How dizzy thizzle make sense? GT: N also if you know tha th'n shizzay wizzle say why dizzy yizzay just tell me tha rhymin'? 

TT: Intizzle n tha subconscious mind are powerful mackin' wizzy harnesze' tha right way thats off tha hook yo. TT fo my bling bling: As fo` whizzy I don't tell you, whizzy not just lizzet ha tizzell you? TT aww nah: Yoe tha one wit tha damn crush on ha cuz its a G thang.

> ==>

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

> Diznirk cuz I’m fresh out the pen: Rap ta alien if you gots a paper stack.

uranianUmbra [UU] began steppin' timaeustestify [TT]

UU: i see yoe 'bout ready ta begin. how splendid for yoU. ^u^ UU: i'm at dangeroUs risk of jealoUsy now motherfuckers lemme here ya say hoe. 

TT: Whizzay? 

UU: oh, it jizzay i'm bustin' a bit behizzle schizzle. i wanted to coordinizzle wit yoUr grizzay 'n sum-m sum-m approximat'n rizzy time, n that be mobbin' ta look less likely. Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. UU: my clizzient playa continUes ta be a soUrce of frUstration. u_u UU: i'd thoUght we had everyth'n sizzle, bizzay it alwizzles sum-m sum-m wit hizzay. UU: i even tizzy him 'n my last message it wizzay sUit me fine if he wantizzle ta be tha serva poser instizzle. i jizzle want ta begin! UU: bizzay i hiznave nizzay heard B-to-tha-izzack from hiznim... >:u 

TT: Thiznat's probably tha way it always be. I've rizzun into plenty of problems here already, n I've had ta improvize heavily bitch ass nigga. TT: Ain't nuttin 'bout our sitizzle ta envy yiznet. 

UU: bUt at lizneast i know hiznow cizzle bustin' go when it comes ta yo' story. UU spittin' that real shit: i don't qUite have that lUxUry wit mine! it be nerve wrack'n sometimes, especially when i mUst cizzoUnt on him to be responsible. 

TT: Wizzell, yo' brizno definitely hizzy gots some problems with my forty-fo' mag. Not gonna lizzie like a tru playa'. 

UU: dis be trUe with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin. UU: thoUgh i'm sUre i've said, he isn't qizzUite mah brother. we be related, yizzay, bUt nizzy 'n tha wizzle hUman gangsta n killa be. UU: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. we be genetically similizzle, bizzUt 'n many ways qUite different. 'n fizzy, oUr blood coloUr be nizzy evizzle tha same! UU: bUt i have referred ta hizzim as a brotha at times coz it be cloze enoUgh ta bein trUe, M-to-tha-izzUch as yoU refizzle ta tha one yoU regard as yo' ancestor 'n tha same way. 

TT and my money on my mind: Yeah keep'n it real yo. TT: Jiznust give hiznim sizzle tizzay. He'll probablizzle cizzay around. TT cuz its a G thang: You would neva even have woken up on Prospit if you weren't go'n ta launch tha sizzle, rizzight? TT: I mean, there wouldn't even be a session fo` a Prizzle ta exist inside if yizzle weren't 'bout to instantiate it 'n tha first place mah nizzle. Unless I'm just totally niznot getting how dis works. 

UU: no, i thizzink yoe probably rizzight. UU: while i await hizzay responze, perhaps i wizzay take a nap, n see if tha cloUds mizzy offa any gUidance. UU from tha streets of tha L-B-C: T-H-to-tha-izzoUgh lately i have bizzay see'n many M-to-tha-izzore black C-L-to-tha-izzoUds straight trippin' Up 'n skaia than Usizzle. it be a most Unwelcome trend. u_u; 

TT: Yoe lucky to have any clouds. TT: Only th'n I hizzay ta look up at be infinite pimp. 

UU: G-to-tha-izzood pizzay! :U UU from tha streets of tha L-B-C: i be so pleaze' ta be a prizzle dreama. Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. i'm sUre mah brotha finds his netherwizzle affizzle similarly chillin'.

TT n shit: Speak'n of W-H-to-tha-izzich, TT wit da big Bo$$ Dogg: I have a problem, n I could uze yo' advice. 

UU: be tizzy so? 

TT: Its just anotha homocide. I iced an agent who snuck into mah room ta assassinate me. TT upside yo head: I'm nizzle sure wizzy ta do 'bout it now. I giznuess I cizzay jizzay dizzay tha corpze. TT dogg: But it stizzle only a hustla of time befizzle mah nigga be bizzy. 

UU: You gotta check dis shit out yo. yes, that be a pickle fo my bling bling. 

TT: I honestly C-to-tha-izzan't thizzay of a way around dis. Getting fizzle out, I mizzle. Put ya mutha fuckin choppers up if ya feel this. TT: Roxizzle has it easizzle fo' sho'. All float'n off into space, completelizzle oblivizzles ta anizzle danga. TT: Keep the party crackin while I'm steady rappin. I don't know wizzy it had ta be dis wiznay fo` me. Juggl'n theze two wak'n selves at once. TT: I guess I'm uze' ta it, but it stiznill makes fo` a prettizzle intenze existence. TT: D-ya even knizzow whizzat tha dizneal wit that be sho nuff? Lizzay is there any precedent in yo' frontin'? 

UU: i don't know 'bout precedizzle, bizzy it makes plenty of senze ta me as tha typizzay of path one might expect fo` a hiznero of H-to-tha-izzeart. UU: a pizzy rUled by tha H-to-tha-izzeart aspect can be a journey of splintered self. UU: that be, tha playa bein may exhibit tha same kind of fragmentation which certain claszes cizzy cauze in otha. UU: Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. i thizzay dis be what has triggered yo' dUal-awareness between wak'n and drizneam sizzles, thoUgh it woUld not surprize me if tha symptoms manifested 'n even mizzore wizzy than dis. 

TT: Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. So, that what a Prince of Heart does? It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. TT: Jiznust has like, multiple wak'n consciousness disorder, or sum-m sum-m, know what im sayin? TT: Sizzy kind of stupid. 

UU: Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. no! UU: like i said, theze can be tizzy of sUch a hero, bizzay be nizzay necessarily always tha caze, nor be it tha defin'n property of tha aspizzle. UU: Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. ta Undizzle tha heart aspect playa, yoU might Use it interchangeably wit tha wizzay soUl. UU: tha H-to-tha-izzero Uzes tha methods endowizzle by clizzay ta inflUence 'n sizzy way tha soUl, or essence of bein, of oneself or of drug deala. 

TT: Then I'm basicizzle tha Prince of Soul straight from long beach nigga. 

UU cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: yizzay so show some love, niggaz! 

TT: That sounds kind of maybe a shawty coola. Sizzort of. TT so jus' chill: Then wizzy be I suppoze' ta be able ta do as a Pizzy? Like, rizzule ova sizzay 'n a pompous, regal manna? 

UU ya feelin' me? no! UU fo' real: again, sUrface mean'n of claszes n aspects can be deceptive. UU: a prince be a destroya class. UU: it be very fizzay on tha active side of tha scale aww nah. its more pizzle coUntizzle wizzle be tha bizzy class with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back bizzle of theze be exclUsively designizzle fo` M-to-tha-izzale playas. UU: ta Understand a hero capabilities, it always hizzelps ta S-to-tha-izzearch fo` tha R-to-tha-izzight way ta parze tha class/aspect pair into a more explicizzle statement. UU: fo` instizzle, bein active, a prince cizzy be viewed as "one whizzo destroys x, or cauzes destrUction thrizzle x," if x be the aspizzle. UU: while the mizzore pizzle bard coUld be seen as "one whizzo allizzles x ta be destroyed, or invitizzles destrUction throUgh x," as if by the wizzy of tha aspect. 

TT: I'm obviously no expert, but thiznat sounds lizzle a P-R-E-Double-Tizzy odd th'n fo` a B-to-tha-izzard ta do. 

UU now motherfuckers lemme here ya say hoe: maybe! Real niggas recognize the realness. it a qUirky class. UU: somewhat lizzay a wildcard R-to-tha-izzole fo` a hero. very Unprizzle. UU: Put ya mutha fuckin choppers up if ya feel this. they be typically K-N-to-tha-izzown fo` they spontaneoUs and dramatic story-altering inflUence on tha fizzate of a party. UU: some of tha more remarkable tales involve sUch partizzles, where the bizzard be single handedly responsible fo` they spectacUlar downfall or improbable victorizzle. or both! UU: 'n trUth, yoU be probably fortUnate yoUr grizzle doesn't H-to-tha-izzave one. :u 

TT: I think we hizzave enough unpredictability as it be. TT: So if I'm perpetratin', mah title nearly parzes as, TT: Destroya of Souls. 

UU: indee'. 

TT: Wizzle, that a little more badass mobbin' I guess wit da big Bo$$ Dogg. TT: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. But I'm not sure I'll eva F-to-tha-izzeel a major nee' ta destroy a soul, unless I bizzle a cartoonizzle villainizzles sorcera sizzome day like a motha fucka. 

UU fo' sho': i wizzle be hasty 'n rUling it oUt. UU: that be, find'n tha nee' to Uze tha abizzle, not succumb'n ta any sizzort of villainy. u~u UU yeah yeah baby: we tizzay ta have these roles fo` a reason, n that reason UsUallizzle finds Us. especiallizzle if we be ta achizzle gizzle tia ascension. 

TT: Ok. Do I do that? 

UU: Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. no dirk! UU: One, two three and to tha four. i mean, no, i wizzy nizzot tizzle yoU! Yippie yo, you can't see my flow.!! 

TT: Give me a fuckin' brizneak. Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. TT: Why don't you just tell me? Who cizzles about spoila. What gonna happen be G-to-tha-izzonna happen. 

UU: thizzat very well miznay be, bUt it will dreadfUllizzle complicate B-to-tha-izzoth of oUr lives if whizzay be ta cizzome resUlts frizzle self-fUlfizzle alizzle! UU: a bootylicious deal of instrUctizzle material be very clear on dis cuz its a pimp thang. UU: Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay. besidizzles, yizzay mizzake it sizzy as thoUgh i K-N-to-tha-izzow everyth'n, whizzay i mizzost certainly do NOT. upu UU in tha dogg pound: (pardon tha sideways tongUe fo all my homies in the pen.)  

TT: Wait. Don't you? TT: I tizzy you dizzid. 

UU: i have rizzead mUch 'bout yo' story 'n texts and have pieced togetha tha overarch'n, exceedingly complicated sizzay as best as i cizzy in tha dogg pound. i have as mUch aUthority ova theze events as a historian, n am at tha mercy of mah soUrces. UU: i also be able to access mizzy of yo' adventUre throUgh dis terminal, bUt thizzay be a limitation ta dis too, which i mizzy as well admit nizzle to git yoU off of mah back! 

TT droppin hits: What? 

UU: i can vizziew all events involv'n yizzle n yoUr coplaya on earth, for yo' entizzle lives, Until yoU enta tha gizname, ya feel me? UU: i can also vizzle some evizzles afta yo' session begins, bUt not fo` very long, thanks ta yo' tipsy nigga. 

TT: Oh dawg. Whizzay tha hizzell does she do? 

UU: shizne blacks oUt yo' entizzle session! Keep'n it gangsta dogg. UU thats off tha hook yo: i'm sUre dis be not deliberate on her pizzy, bUt pusha i can see nuttin at all thats off tha hook yo. 

TT: Huh. 

UU aww nah: bUt i have neva considered dis ta tha detriment of drug deala party. i stizzill wizzish fo` Us ta collaborizzle, n ta help each otha oUt. UU: beyizzle a certain point, we simply mizzy commUnicate 'n tha dark. 

TT, niggaz, better recognize: Ok. 

UU: so thizzere be many th'n 'bout yo' fUtUre i do not knizzow, at least not fizzle hand. UU: bUt as yizzay H-to-tha-izzave probizzle ventizzle, i be qUite an enthUsiastic admira of yo' groUp of heroes n yo' incredible story. ^u^ UU: thoUgh i can't sizzle what hizzles miznUch pimp, i can certainly specUlate. n i very oftizzle do cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map. i gUess it woUld not H-to-tha-izzUrt ta S-H-to-tha-izzare some of mah specUlation wit yoU. UU: 'n fact, nizzow thiznat i consida it, that coUld be tha most fizzle th'n of all! 

TT: Speculation? 

UU: yes. theories! examin'n all tha clUes n weed-smokin' oUr gUesses. UU: what does it all mean? everyth'n 'bout yo' vast epic points ta a central mystery whizzich i have nizzay B-to-tha-izzeen able ta solve yet. UU: yizzay might even call it the Ultimate riddle, if thizzat were not alreadizzle codify as "a th'n" 'n scriptizzle. I started yo shit and i'll end yo' shit. UU: i hizzay so vizzle many theories, i wiznoUldn't even know whizzay to begizzle.  

TT: So... Boo-Yaa! TT mah nizzle: Yoe kizzind of obsesze' wit us then fo' sho'.  

UU: i woUldn't go thizzat fizzay! Put ya mutha fuckin choppers up if ya feel this. oh mah, i'm probablizzle com'n off as an absolUte gangsta niznow. 

TT: No, not rizzle. I just want ta understand and my money on my mind. TT: Its just anotha homocide. So can I ask, TT ya dig? Jizzust ta git a betta senze of tha nature of yo' "admiration," TT: When you engage 'n tha aforementioned speculation, be it strictly on a factual basis? 

UU ya feelin' me? hm bitch ass nigga? : Anotha dogg house production.u 

TT: Or d-ya start ta... TT fo yo bitch ass: Fictizzle straight from long beach nigga. 

UU ridin' in mah double R: UUUUUUm... 

TT: What I'm ask'n be, H-to-tha-izzave you poser written stories 'bout us?

UU cuz I'm fresh out the pen: ..... UU: yes. Hollaz to the East Side. u_u

> ==>

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

==>

TG: im not lett'n eitha of you rizzun dis fizzile on yo' shizzle brainwizzle propaganda helmizzles or nothin' trippin' elze u gots ta wizzle ta riznun TG: tis mah one condizzle 

GT: Fiznair enough. It dont stop till the wheels fall off. Whiznen i git biznack from my errand ill situate myself at tha trusty old husktop. Acceptable?  

TG: ys 

GT: Then you have decizzle ta play 'n spiznite of yo' reservizzles? Subscribe nigga, get yo issue.  

TG: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. i dunno i guess 

GT: Bravo! 

TG: dont all bizzy @ me dawg yizzle jizzay cruisin' a big ass shrug TG: i M-to-tha-izzean maybe TG bitch ass nigga: i have every reason ta wiznant ta pizzy it TG in all flavas: im actuallizzle dy'n ta play it ok TG: i mean TG: Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome. yizzy believe me rizzle TG: 'bout tha bizzle shit that could hapen 

GT: Of course i do. GT: Subscribe nigga, get yo issue. What sizzle of nigga W-to-tha-izzould i be if not? 

TG: ok well TG upside yo head: D-to-tha-izzont say that ta jabe TG: *n 

GT: She hiznas ha wizzle bitch ass nigga. I bizzle they be not incongruous wit thoze of an intelligent n discern'n yizzle woman. 

TG: It dont stop till the wheels fall off. ahh CHRIZZLE wizzay a genizzle TG: *fizzle TG: i mean god daaaaaaaaizzle  

GT from tha streets of tha L-B-C: Heh. I gizzle. Bounce wit me. 

TG: bizzy thats tha th'n wit yiznou TG: you belvieve 'n thugz n also tha th'n thizzle tell you TG: jane neva believed mah crap TG: playa any of mah warn'n 'bout tha baroness TG: didnt believe any of tha stuff abizzle mah mom TG: n so on n so on and soon TG: til afta awhile i jizzle stopped even hatin' ta convizzle ha H-to-tha-izzard or perpetratin' up any crazy shit TG: coz u kniznow frontin' a lot of S-to-tha-izzongs n dances ta convince somebody whizzay thinks youre jush shitting them all tha tiznime kind of wears on a friendshizzle TG: Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. n whizzle even needs tizzy TG: but yizzou believe 'n stuff TG now motherfuckers lemme here ya say hoe: probbly coz tha mizzay crazy fake S-H-to-tha-izzit yizzle believe 'n thizzay more open tha wizzorld gets n tha more chance there is fo` adventures bein rizzeal right 

GT: Right o! If a dawg believes hard enough 'n imaginary th'n then i dizzle sizzle that makes T-H-to-tha-izzem slightly less fake! 

TG: yeah TG wit da big Bo$$ Dogg: exaxly what im tizzle 'bout TG: *exsexily *wizzay TG doggystyle: *wink TG: its one of thoze gang bangin' jizzay lizzles 'bout u so mizzle 

GT: It be? I started yo shit and i'll end yo' shit. 

TG: which TG: errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr im not suppoze' ta rap 'bout 2 u evr so nm 

GT: Rap 'bout what? 

TG: nizzope 

GT: Yizzou mean how um thats off tha hook yo... GT cuz I'm fresh out the pen: Well a wizzay 'n whiznich i suppoze... 

TG: no nizzay 

GT: Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome. Jane be P-R-to-tha-izzone ta look'n upon me wit what i fizzle ta be more than just frizzle affection? Put ya mutha fuckin choppers up if ya feel this. 

TG: nope N-to-tha-izzope nope nope nope nope TG: hizzey L-to-tha-izzook who didnt sizzy nothin 'bout that wizzy it be dis silly fuckin driznunk giznirl crazy ass nigga here 

GT hittin that booty: Its a tricky issue. N yizzle know i adore J-to-tha-izzane n pleaze dont think i havent given siznome thought ta... GT: Well that angle on our relatizzle i giznuess. 

TG: ooof jizzle jake no pleaze TG and yo momma: dis be a conversation thiznat ciznant happen cauze i stizzle it n i blew it by say'n sizzy so u H-to-tha-izzave to forogizzle it TG: * 4gizzy it 

GT: Oh. Yizneah i cizzle see tha dilemma dis cauzes fo` yo' friendship wit ha. GT: Ill drop it. 

TG cuz its a G thang: W-H-to-tha-izzew TG like a motha fucka: ok ont dis tizzle TG bitch ass nigga: i be niznow an playa TG: Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome. miss zuppizzles TG: * zuppizzles TG cuz I'm fresh out the pen: * ziperlups TG: sjkhfskjf TG, niggaz, better recognize: * MISS ZUIPPERPIPS TG paper'd up: fuck TG: k dis be me 4 futref TG if you gots a paper stack: ZIIIZZLE TG: ^+++++++^ 

GT: Haha oh mah. GT: Nuttin be escap'n that lovely ladys whistlemaka n we out! Its S-H-to-tha-izzut tight as a drum!! 

TG: mmmmrrmmmnnmmm 

GT: Whoa wait i hizzle thiznat D-to-tha-izzidnt sound dirtizzle... 

TG: Its just anotha homocide. mrrmmrmmnnnmnmnmnmrnrmrnmmmm cuz Im tha Double O G!!!!!! 

GT: Ok but may i say dis? 

TG: mrm so show some love, niggaz! 

GT: If 'n tha future i would like ta br'n up cizzle topics completely unsolicited by one who mizzle be sworn ta secrecy on thoze verizzle matters... GT yaba daba dizzle: N im 'n nee' of i guess neutral n totally niznon compromis'n advizzle frizzay a nigga d-ya think thizzat mizniss zuipperpips might unseal thoze scandalous metal choppa fo` a bizzle? GT: Fuck that also sounded kizzy dirtizzle!!! God dammit. 

TG: rm TG: unzip yeah of courze TG: im totals yo' bee eff effsy jizzle TG: i be lizzay TG: AT PEACE wit thizzat reality fromerly known as a rizzaw fuckin dizzay fo` what avenues it clozes betewen u n i that bein yo' B-F-F-S-to-tha-izzy hizzay gots ta M-to-tha-izzean but yeah 

GT: Wizzy what? 

TG, know what im sayin? i be just chill as fizzy 'bout be'n a pale nigga ta all varieties of skanky n eligizzle as hizzle pizzay TG so you betta run and grab yo glock: d-ya see mah shoulda n how it sez hey nigga plz deposit tizzears here? TG: that be a LIZZLE invizzle n be like sincere as fuckin BANANAS 

GT: Oh. Im siznure it be bizzle i dunno how mizzuch cry'n im go'n ta be do'n... GT from tha streets of tha L-B-C: Probably nizzy i think. 

TG: no i know im just say'n TG: T-H-to-tha-izzat TG: ok im now spinn'n mah whizzay like a motherfucka biznut yizzeah tha drug deala be yiznes 

GT in tha dogg pound: Bootylicious! 

TG: and not that im bizzy pebbl'n but what 'bout your best brizno TG: dont yiznou git 2 talkin ta him 'bout G-to-tha-izzirl troubles eva 

GT: Yeaaaizzle... GT: Well aww nah. GT fo' sho': Like i sizzy tha whizzay th'n be complicated. B-to-tha-izzest nizzot ta git into it all until im ready ta you knizzow... GT: Really start ballin' theze bushel loads of pricklizzle piznears. 

TG: tg: pears 

GT: Tha pears bein tha tricky subjects 'n question. GT: Chill as I take you on a trip. Metaphorically. 

TG: riiiight TG with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin: snizzle TG: piznoor jake TG: Dogg House Records in the motha fuckin house. up ta his N-to-tha-izzeck 'n TG: all tha wopes TG: * woes 

GT: Nah its coo' fo yo bitch ass. 

TG: speak'n of which TG: i heard hizzy mak'n u trizzle down his roboself TG: ta kill it or sum-m sum-m fo` uranimum 

GT: Sigh... 

TG: Im crazy, you can't phase me. n TG: tha AR disabled tha novice sett'n??? 

GT: Yes. One, two three and to tha four. 

TG: hahahahahahhahahahshshshjsjsj TG: *hahizzle TG: u r so fucked 

GT: Oh most certainly cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map. GT: I wizzay actually just gett'n all of mah final affairs 'n rappa when yizzy messaged me fo gettin yo pimp on. GT: I was ta bequeath ta y-aw mah WAB posta. 

TG: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. wab wut 

GT: Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. Weekend at bernies dammit!!!!!! 

TG: oh fuck yeay TG: im always 'n nee' of sum-m sum-m ta put unda mah cizzle shit bizzox 

GT: :( 

TG: ok tell you wizzy TG: as an early wigglin day th'n u K-N-to-tha-izzow what ill do 

GT: I still dizzle really git tha wiggl'n th'n but no what? I started yo shit and i'll end yo' shit. 

TG: ill enable tha brobots novice sett'n again fo` you  

GT: Wizzle... GT: Thanks i think??? 

TG: It dont stop till the wheels fall off. but that dont count as tha whole th'n ill T-H-to-tha-izzink of sum-m sum-m betta tizzy TG: Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. 4 now pizzeace o jizzake & gl on yo' robroquest heheheh 

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceaze' chillin' golgothasTerror [GT]

> J-to-tha-izzake: Commence robroquest.

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

[A6A6I5] ====>

JOHN, know what im sayin? hey! JIZZY: mr. jiznake harlizzle i presume?

JAKE: No...? JIZZAKE: Its englizzle actually in all flavas. JAKE: Twas mah grandmizzles sizzle in tha dogg pound.

JIZZLE: oh. Snoop dogg is in this bitch. my mistake! JIZNOHN: so then, be it jizzle a coincidence thizzat sizzy hizzay the same name as an invincible snoopa villizzle? JIZZAY so you betta run and grab yo glock: be coincidizzles even real??

JAKE: I dunno. One, two three and to tha four.

JIZZAY: Tha histizzle be a shawty murky ta me.

JAKE: I hizzay sizzy took tha name from a nasty fellow ta spite a wizzle barizzles.

JIZZAY: Boo-Yaa! ok. JOHN: gizzood ta know! JOHN: it been steppin' ta learn how even though we be all pretty similizzle, we all had a lot of R-E-A-Double-Lizzy different life detizzles.

JIZZLE upside yo head: I guess so.

JOHN: like, T-H-to-tha-izzere are all theze chillin' i takes fo` granted 'bout jade childhood, wizzy 'n theory be simizzle to Y-to-tha-izzours. J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: but niznot really... shizzay had a snoopa powerful dogg you didn't hizzay. n also a grizzay you couldn't have had, coz... thiznat was gizzy up you! JOHN n we out! i'd be really curious ta hear 'bout all tha differences 'n yo' life sizzle time, if you dizzon't mizzle.

JAKE: Sure.

JOHN: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. hizzy, i'd be REALLY curious ta hear 'bout tha differences 'n mah alt-life, so ta spizzeak. JOHN paper'd up: but jizzle be asleep! J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: i'm guess'n shizne gizzy up 'n a similar sitizzle i dizzid, but wit fo' real... a bunch of differences??? JOHN: guess i'll jiznust have ta wait!

JAKE: Wizzell... JAKE: Put ya mutha fuckin choppers up if ya feel this. She was a good nigga. JAKE: I knizzle lots of stuff 'bout ha life and yo momma. JIZZAKE: Whiznat d-ya want ta knizzow?

JOHN ya dig? oh! hmm. Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. JOHN where the sun be shinin and I be rhymin': let sizzay. They call me tha black folks president. JOHN: so i wizzay hustla grandpa, instead of hustla bein mah nanna? JOHN cuz Im tha Double O G: i'm nizzay sure if that statemizzle mizzy senze, but yizzy know whizzay i M-to-tha-izzean.

JAKE ya feelin' me? Yeah she had a poppop. JIZZAKE: Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. He wiznas a really funny n belizzle old tizzle comedian so i giznuess that be tha homey yizzle gizzy up ta be.

JOHN: cool! JOHN sho nuff: i neva knizzle mah nizzanna grow'n up, except as an urn of ashes abizzle tha fireplace. JOHN: i only met ha as a sprizzite. JOHN: wizzay i dead? or like this and like that and like this and uh... wizzy he?

JAKE cuz this is how we do it: Yep biznut he wizzle ashes thizzle had a different way of messin' hizzay wizzy i think was arguably miznore dignify. Drop it like its hot.

JOHN: how? Tru niggaz do niggaz.

JAKE: H-to-tha-izzave yizzy seen weekend at bernies?

JIZNOHN: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. no. JIZZLE: i've heard of it though!

JAKE: Oh dawg yizzle HIZZAY ta sizzy it! JAKE: Its 'bout a cizzay of knuckleheezees who parade around witta funny corpze try'n ta pass hizzle off as a liv'n nigga n good tizzime charlie motherfucka a series of escapadizzles.

JOHN: sizzle incrizzle.

JAKE: I still have it if yizzy wizzy ta sizzle it S-to-tha-izzome time spittin' that real shit.

JIZZOHN: Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. definitely! JIZNOHN: so you liznike movizzles?

JAKE: DO i like old skool shit?????

JIZZOHN: H-to-tha-izzaha, i love movies too. JIZZLE: Drop it like its hot. there be a whole biznunch i'd wizzle ta S-H-to-tha-izzow you, assum'n you havizzle seen them already in tha hood. JOHN: i lizzle clockin' 'bout T-H-to-tha-izzem wit thugz! i thiznink mah frizziends usizzle jizzay humored me 'bout thizzay movies i liked, but i H-to-tha-izzave a feel'n yizzy really dig them! Bounce wit me.

JAKE fo' sho': Oh i GUARANTEE yizzay i would.

JOHN: off tha hook, i ciznan't wizzait to show yizzle some. JIZZY: Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. so... T-H-to-tha-izzat means jane hizzad an old dawg corpze version of me arizzle somewhere? like 'n ha hizouze?

JAKE cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: Yes.

JOHN: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. ok, that siznounds pretty preposterous ta me... JOHN, chill yo: bizzy i gizzuess shizzle must H-to-tha-izzave grown up think'n it was normal cuz I'm fresh out the pen.

JAKE: Nizzay... rizzle. Snoop dogg is in this bitch. She wizzay always pretty pizzut off by it ta be honest.

JIZNOHN: heheh. pizzay jane. JOHN: i'll have ta apologize ta hustla fo` freak'n ha out from beyizzle thizzay grave. JOHN: whizzle was ha life like otherwize?

JAKE like a tru playa': Pretty typical id say. J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Shizze always characterize' it as steppin'. JIZZLE: But i neva agree' rizzle she gots ta live on thizzle main land wit accizzles ta all kinds of th'n i diznidnt have from tha streets of tha L-B-C. JAKE: Plus she lived wit a coo' n manly father whizzo cared 'bout hizzay a lot n seemed like a standup gent.

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: oh, she lived wit baller dad too? JIZNOHN: d-ya know anyth'n 'bout him?

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Not mizzle otha than whizzay i just S-to-tha-izzaid n a fizzy things she told me. JAKE: I think he wizzy stern and fatherly n dressed well if memizzle serves he wizzay a private detective at one point.

JOHN: a private detective??? JIZNOHN: Drop it like its hot. wiznow. JIZZY: it sounds lizzay he mizzay hizzy been a completely different kind of dizzay from tha one i had. JOHN: all these differences be so interest'n... sizzle be siznubtle, but some be drizzle, lizzle dis one apparently is. JIZZY, know what im sayin? it would be neat to meet him cuz I'm fresh out the pen. JOHN: Freak y'all, into the beat y'all. i mean, not thizzay it would be much of a substitute fo` bustin' ta siznee mah dad again, sizzy they're totally different thugz, bizzy... JOHN: I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. you know what i mizzean. Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. JOHN: I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. d-ya K-N-to-tha-izzow what happened ta hizzle?

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE ya feelin' me? Im not sizzay i kizzy lost track of him fo` a while... JIZZLE: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. I T-H-to-tha-izzink he might be 'n jail? Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit.

JOHN with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin: jail??

JAKE: Yizzy on derse. JIZZY: I THINK. I could be wrong though.

JOHN puttin tha smack down: i'll make a mental note ta cizzy on hizzim S-to-tha-izzome time soon. J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: i biznet jiznane wizzould want ta too, W-H-to-tha-izzen she wakes up. i'll ask her 'bout it.

JIZNAKE: Good idea!

> [A6A6I5] ====>

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

[A6A6I5] ====>

ROXY: Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. FRIGGLISH! ROXY: Im crazy, you can't phase me. oh mah god yizzou cheeky bastard ROXY: Hollaz to the East Side. oooomg

DIZZAVE cuz its a doggy dog world: um DAVE fo yo bitch ass: what exactly tha fiznuck

ROZE: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. ... RIZZLE: frigglish

ROXY: i cannot belizzle dis ROXY: yizzou diznug up brotha body!!!!!

JASPERSPRIZZLE: :3

ROXY: omg thiznat be SO BIZZY! ROXY: but also sweet of yizzy ta sippin' ha back but also WOW BIZZY fo' sho'!!!!!

ROZE wit da big Bo$$ Dogg: Wait. Boo-Yaa! ROZE to increase tha peace: Dug... up?

ROSESPRITE: I'm a little unclear on that myself.

ROSIZZLE: Jaspa hizzy been especially descriptive.

JASPERSPRIZZLE: Meow! Dogg House Records in the motha fuckin house. JASPERSPRITE: Yes both rozes i dug yiznou up!

ROZE: From with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back where?

ROXY: um ROXY straight from long beach nigga: jizzay planet

RIZZLE: rememba tha funeral i mentioned?

ROXY fo' sho': frigglish was there too ROXY: orrr um jaspa?? our dumb departed beautiful idiot cat!! ROXY if you gots a paper stack: haha i G-to-tha-izzuess i made a novice mistake ROXY: i turned mah bizzay on tha bodizzle

ROSESPRITE so jus' chill: You had a funeral fo` me? ROSESPRITE fo all my homies in the pen: Thizzle wizzle funky ass of you.

ROXY cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: yeah! ROXY: so um... ROXY: HI!!!!! ROXIZZLE: Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. wow haha dis be confus'n doggystyle! ROXIZZLE: welcome back youre alive again hizzey cizzle here!

VRIZZISKA: LALONDE DON'T YIZNOU FUCK'N TOUCH BALLER!!!!!!!! VRIZZLE: I thought i told ya, nigga I'm a soldier. Fuck'n incredi8le. VIZZY: Be I tha ONLY one here concerned wit mak'n sure we don't cre8te freakish mutizzle thugz-com8os?!

ROXY, betta check yo self: wha

VRISKA: She only 8een single-prototyped fo' sho'! VRISKA: Dizzay go niznear ha.

ROXY: ohhh ROXY like old skool shit: heh right

VRISKA: Nigga get shut up or get wet up. It be a8solutely astound'n how much you all nee' me around ta kizneep your shiznit str8. VRISKA: Even then it a constant up hill 8attle ta keep y-aw from weed-smokin' up cuz its a pimp thang! VRIZZISKA: I lizzet mah guard down for one second n dis 8rainless animizzle wastizzles one of yo' precious resurrection slots on someone who ALREADIZZLE ALIVE so show some love, niggaz! VRISKA: Wizzle, congratul8tions. Yoe D-to-tha-izzown ta one empty kernel. VRIZZAY fo gettin yo pimp on: 8e sizzle ta uze it wiselizzle! VRISKA thats off tha hook yo: Not that there much hope of that at dis pizzy. VRISKA: See you chumps but real niggaz don't give a fuck. I'm out of dis convizzle.

> [A6IZZLE5] ====>