#also if u want an inside look into how insane ocd and emetophobia can be:
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what did i do to deserve an ibs flare-up at 11 pm.......
#i mean i went way too hard at dinner for someone whos getting over a migraine. so. thats probably it#also i wasnt really feeling the snack i ate but i made myself eat some anyway bc i was getting Weird Anxiety so. exposure therapy.#however the exposure therapy kicked my gastrocolic reflex into high gear and now. here i am.#sittin on da bathroom floor. heating pad on my tummy. mourning that stupid stupid idea to eat peanut butter crackers#summer's text tag#also if u want an inside look into how insane ocd and emetophobia can be:#two of our cats puked tn. it was 100% from the cat food they both ate for Their dinner.#but for some reason my brain has been like 'no... no. it was actually the chicken u ate tn.' bc ONE of the cats who puked i gave a teeny bi#of my chicken tenders to. and so. yah. my brains like welp. even tho ur other cat didnt have ANYTHING. u gave em both food poisoning#and now YOU have food posioning. and ur gonna suffer for all of eternity now. this is the worst thing that could ever happen to u#or!!!!! my brain has ALSO been telling me 'you got cat saliva on ur hand from one of the cats that got sick from their food so now YOU are#also sick. from their food. from a single POTENTIAL saliva hand. and now u will suffer. this is the worst thing ever for u.'#but blah blah blah blah i am strong i am brave and even when im not brave im actually still brave for being scared [like rn]#i just wanna finish in here so i can go to BEDDDDD
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