#also i'm still not sure what the ''fuck'' square means exactly

[wildflowercryptid]

FOR THE BLORBO BINGO !! GUSTAFA

ya'll don't understand, this dude is on my mind daily and it's driving me up the wall. <- (positive) forever obsessed with him, he's one of my top fave marriage candidates from the sos/bokumono series now.

and i'll use the free space as an excuse to share a lil headcanon : gustafa's parents are both classical musicians so he has classical training a few different instruments, viola being his strong suit.

[mamawasatesttube]

Is there anything in fanfics that you would like to explore more into?

*hastily shoves my 12 partly-written wips and 8948278 unwritten fic ideas under the bed* haha whatttt i mean maybe a few ideas but nothing craaaazy...

my wip folder rn:

cass's secret weapon… superstud.docx

gender i hardly know er.docx

i could spread YOU in the sheets.docx

jons big bro has got it going o.docx

nerd 4 geek type friendship.docx

red sub projector. i mean sun. i mean.docx

serlkon tacky earring exchange.docx

tim drake hits on supernova. whore.docx

ttk time.docx

what if im not a spicy enough boyfriend….docx

who would win. two heroes or one ouppy dog.docx

ideas that would take more than just a quick oneshot and therefore that i have not actually committed to doing yet:

tim and kon get trapped in a black mercy-esque shared dream world. for some reason, kon's mental paradise involves dating a guy who's like, almost exactly just tim, but a little to the left. what's up with that? is kon... into tim? but that can't be right because if he was, surely his dream would just involve dating tim. right? it can't just be that this is the hallucination world's solution to kon's desperate fear of ruining things and losing tim because he's convinced he's broken and not made for lasting relationships because he hasn't processed his trauma around being groomed. ...right? (and then tim proceeds to do mental gymnastics that would do the flying graysons proud.)

a rewrite of sotm that includes much more of the steels, an actual talk about the time mae told kon he wasn't worthy of the s-shield and physically ripped the patches off his costume, some real kon & kara, and more discussion of kon's suicidality.

the timkon love square au... ouhhhh it would be so fun. it'd have a backdrop of the superfam being just much more isolated than they are in canon and how that would play into their themes of loneliness in the heart of the world. and it would include tim being a nosy little fuck and being so lois lane-coded.

kon & cassie duet character study or something about their nearly simultaneous realizations of "oh fuck i'm gay" and "wait shit i'm a lesbian" and then the ensuing "oh no was i never actually into you? did i lead you on for that entire time? was i stringing you along and playing cruel games with your heart without meaning to?" guilt. and the catharsis of it all when they come out to each other and realize that this was actually why they felt drawn to each other, and why it felt so safe with each other. would delve into cassie's struggles with how people ripped into her for not being donna and for not being pretty enough, with her grief and her loneliness with the lack of her secret identity, and with her own internalized homophobia, and with kon's struggle to grapple with his previous unacknowledged relationship trauma and how therefore a relationship where his girlfriend wasn't actually into him made him feel so safe. because like. they are so so so important to each other even if it's not romantic and that is important to meeee

the "kon unionizes the labor guild" new krypton au that lives rent free in my mind but that i have not properly plotted out yet but that i still desperately need. it'd be heavy on immigrant feelings and also the kon & kal & kara trio.

...and more!!! augh!!!

[papermint-airplane]

WARNING: HUGE RANT AHEAD

As per the request from @nectar-cellar:

Oh boy prepare yourself for a foul-mouthed rant because I am MAD!!!! 😠😠😠😠 Not at you, NC. I love you. You can do no wrong in my eyes. 😘

No I am mad at this STUPID FUCKING SIM holy shit

OK FIRST OF ALL

He started life like THIS

What I can only describe as "Disney's Aladdin visits a dude ranch". Yes, I know I have used that exact outfit (minus the boots) for Roman before, shut up, you're not here to expose my hypocrisy, you're here to suffer with me because OH BOY DID I SUFFER.

Ok so he turned out like this. Not bad, you say? No. Bad. Very bad.

I SPENT TWO AND A HALF FUCKING HOURS ON THIS STUPID MOTHERFUCKER AND THERE'S STILL SOMETHING OFF ABOUT HIS FACE AND I CAN'T FIGURE OUT WHAT AND I PUT CONTOURING MAKEUP ON HIS FACE AND YOU CAN BARELY SEE IT BECAUSE FOR SOME REASON, THIS SKINTONE IS IMPOSSIBLE TO COLOR MATCH TONIGHT AND I DON'T KNOW WHY BECAUSE I'M USUALLY GREAT AT COLOR MATCHING FUCK THIS GUY

Yeah so I got him in Live Mode and there is just something about him that is pissing me right the fuck off and I don't know what it is. Is it the eyes? Are the eyes too big? Jaw too square? I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS AND IT'S PISSING ME OFF!!!!!!!!!! I really feel like the eyes are too big but I kept shrinking his eyes until he literally looked like this .👄. and it still didn't help.

I went in and out of CAS at least 7 times and I can't figure out what's off and I can't fix it and I HATE HIMMMMMMMMMM

"Who's made of pixels and sucks ass? This guy!"

"Don't you just love me?"

NO I WANT TO HIT YOU WITH A BUS

I know that making masc men is a challenge for me. This is not new information. It's been a problem for 20 years, it'll be a problem for 20 more. I know what I find attractive in a man, I just don't know what looks good on a Sim. Know what I mean? No? Stop being difficult, you know exactly what I mean.

I also tried using NC's new torso and oh boy that was an adventure because the torso is fire and his face is A FUCKING DISASTER. There is something about his head and his torso that are incongruous with each other and I don't. know. what. it. is. It's driving me crazy. No correction, it has DRIVEN me crazy, past tense. I am crazy now and this fucker is why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOOK AT THIS PIECE OF SHIT WHY DOESN'T HIS HEAD FIT WHAT DID I DO WRONG

I even expanded my slider multiples so I could fine tune things thinking that would help but no I think it made everything worse ESPECIALLY MY MENTAL HEALTH

I hate him. I HAAAAAAAAATEEE HIIIIIIIIIM

So by now you're like "Laura there's nothing wrong with him, Laura you're taking this too seriously, Laura he's fine" and I know. I KNOW! I STILL HATE HIM

And you're god dang right I put that fucker on a pole. If I get community labeled because of this shit heap, I'm gonna lose my shitting mind.

Literally fuck you, I hate you so much. I didn't even give you a name. Do you know what your name is? "Stupid asshole who won't behave" that's what your name is.

I even threw Monica the Devil Girl in there hoping that would help. It didn't.

Know what the worst part is?

I enjoyed this. I mean yeah sure I hated the whole process and I hate the result and I hate this Sim and in a minute, I'm going to have an alien Sim land a meteor on top of his head, but there's something really cathartic about just unloading all of your vitriol on a Sim, you know? And it was definitely a challenge and definitely out of my comfort zone. I'll have to keep trying until I make a male Sim (other than Roman and Aiden) that I'm happy with.

This was a learning experience for sure.

Piece of shit.

[yuri-is-online]

This might just me being tired and dumb, but I kind of get how Ace having a more supportive family would lead to isolation? Like. People who have no family to rely on form their own, and that kind of bond can be beat by very little else. There's not only possibly shared trauma, but there's probably also a shared understanding that "we all we got". It gives a weird sense of hope to see someone else in your situation, someone who relates to you even a little bit, and you want more anything in the world for them to make it out and thrive, and you can trust that they want the same for you.

So with Ace, who's trauma (that we know about) mainly comes from association and the iverblot fights, it's a bit harder to make that bond. He (assumably) got all the love and support that he was supposed to get from his family. And yeah! Sure! He can still seek it out elsewhere! But it's a thing he already has, he already has somewhere to go at the end if the day for comfort.

This is actually a theme that I'm gonna play with in my 80s fic, Deuce is lower middle class, while Yuu is just a slightly glorified version if homeless. Ace is squarely middle class, if not upper middle, he never has to really want for anything. Not like Deuce and certainly not like Yuu.

Learning how to pinch for pennies and find deals are things that makes Aces life more convenient, but it's something that Deuce and Yuu need. And that's where the divide is.

He wants to take care of his friends (he's still in denial) more than anything, but he also feels like there's this weird line he can't cross, with him on one side and Yuu and Deuce on the other. It honestly doesn't help that Yuu has a separate, small friend group outside of him and Deuce that are all in the same "Shit is completely fucked right now but by God are we gonna make it out" boat. A boat that Ace will probably never be in. Ace loves his family and is grateful, and knows exactly how much he lucked out. But he still wants to have that bond. That "the world feels like it's ending but atleast we'll be going down together" type of bond. Comforting Yuu while they cry about not having heating in the winter will never be the same as having to suffer alongside them and know they were in this together. Trying to find the cheapest possible version of a food products with Deuce and discovering knock off brands that Ace would never imagine existing (who the hell made knock off cheerios?) Will never be the same as actually having to rely on those knock off and part time sales, and feeling a sense pride that they were able to save enough money this month that they could actually buy something nice. Ace probably won't ever be on that side of the invisible line.

He'll bring them to his side though. Ace wants to take care of them more than anything. He wants them in his life more than anything. And he'll have them. No matter what he has to do to make that happen.

Sorry if I missread your post and just dropped a huge angst bomb in your inbox! I just have thoughts and there are a lot of AceYuu and ADeuce moments in chapter three and one or two of them digs into this a little.

You didn't misread my post at all I swear we are sharing custody of a braincell because this is just *chef's kiss* exactly what I was thinking.

Having that solid middle class stability and parent's who genuinely love you and each other is nothing to be ashamed of, not that I think Ace has enough humility for that, but it does mean that he has a gap in his understanding for Deuce and especially Yuu's situation. I keep thinking about how he ended up eating those tarts because he skipped a meal over worrying about Yuu and their circumstances, he cares. He is crass and rude with it but he cares! I love how you say he'll bring them to his side of the line, that's exactly how I see him thinking about it.

Ace's isolation (in my view) seems to come from how much more he values his friendship with Yuu and Deuce over literally anyone else in the school. He'd benefit from talking to Jack and Epel more, they also have solid home lives and Jack at least I think has financially stable parents, but those guys aren't his people. For better or worse, for sickness or health, Yuu and Deuce are who he is sticking it out with. He'll never say it in game, but he really does love you both, in what way is of course up to the interpretation of the player.

but you know which one we both prefer frfr

[porcupine-girl]

There is a lesson in here somewhere

IDK, not quite about killing your darlings since this wasn't really darling but about when you're stuck, letting go of what you've got planned or already wrote to get unstuck.

I'm trying desperately to finish this WIP I started back in 2018 for the WIP Big Bang. Fighting with my writing brain the whole way.

I was very very stuck on an early scene. I knew exactly what was supposed to happen, down to what position they were going to have sex in. Scene has been in my brain for several years. Couldn't write it. Maybe because I've been writing less smut than I did back then, and smut was always the hardest thing for me to write? But also maybe because I'll never be back in whatever very specific headspace I was in when I started this scene and so making it go the way I thought it was supposed to go is going to be smashing a round peg into a square hole no matter what.

I had to have such an argument with myself to finally get to what in hindsight is the logical solution!

Me: They could have sex differently. Maybe instead of rushing madly into it they take their time.

*tries that*

*still stuck*

Me2: Maybe... they don't have to have sex? Me: They've already fucked twice, despite this being their first actual date, it seems likely they'd do it again. Me2: Sure, but what if they didn't? Me: But Bitty has to spend the night, it's important to the plot and characters for multiple reasons. Me2: Yes, but he could spend the night and they just... don't have sex. Me: I think you're just trying to worm your way out of writing the smut you're stuck on. Me2: Yeah so? Me: They're so horny for each other, though, that's been established. Me2: Yeah, but what if they don't have sex this time. Me: ...

Lo and behold, when I finally convinced myself to think about how the scene might go if they don't have sex, it worked immediately. I knew exactly what conversation this would lead to, which could reinforce things they said earlier, and how to transition to Bitty spending the night anyhow. I sat down today and easily wrote nearly 1000 words and finished the scene.

Now, the lesson here might be something about not forcing myself to write smut just because there are already explicit scenes in this fic, when my brain doesn't want to, but I think the bigger lesson is if I want to finish this damn thing that might mean throwing out bits of my outline and accepting it going a different way.

[wannaeatramyeon]

ur stuff is so fun to read!! if its ok w u, could u do a taehoon x reader fic where theyre training together and taehoon goes a little too hard on reader? like reader gets upset bc they didnt expect taehoon to go so rough on them and then taehoon spends the rest of the day trying to make it up to them?? ;w; tysm if u do!! have a good one ★

tysm for reading and requesting anon! OF COURSE I CAN! There's a few requests for if X hurts their S/O or the reader. Y'all wanting that sympathy huh?

Seong Taehoon x Reader: Getting accidentally kicked

You had thought that if you were on the receiving end of a kick or a punch, you would be cursing with at least a handful of expletives on reflex. In a serious fight, preferably the adrenaline would flow and you would be able to give back as good as you got.

You had grossly overestimated yourself.

It turns out that, on the receiving end of one of Taehoon's kicks square in the stomach, it actually hurts so much that you cannot utter a sound, struggle to even catch your breath. Bending over double, collapsing to your knees, praying the waves of nausea will pass.

Strong, calloused hands grip you and hold you steady.

It also turns out that Taehoon cannot shut up. Your boyfriend, the sometimes silent but often offensive and deadly type, rambles on and on after the initial shock.

In hindsight, you're not sure which of you is more surprised at his reaction.

"Why the fuck didn't you block? You stupid dumbass. You should have stopped me. How the hell didn't you see that coming? Are you ok? I didn't know you were so weak. I barely even touched you, dipshit. Did I leave a bruise? Were you even paying attention? I didn't mean to hit you so hard. Are you alright? Ugh we shouldn't be sparring, I was worried this would happen!"

Insults and concern all rolling into one big ball of frustration.

And then the waterworks start. You couldn't help it. The pain and Taehoon being so in your face. It's overwhelming. And honestly? Did it also hurt that bastard to hold back a little.

Taehoon absolutely panics. Sure, he's seen you cry before but not because of him hurting you.

Panic leads to your boyfriend not being able to leave you alone. At all.

You don't know whether it starts annoying you or Taehoon first.

Initially, it was fine. You were the one that got the sympathy attention. You didn't mind Taehoon fulfilling your every whim, asking if you're ok, running around for you.

But then it worsened from you being too lazy to do anything to you being forbidden to do anything.

Worried glances drifting to your stomach and ribs every minute, on the minute. Thinned lips and narrowed eyes when you moved at all. Strong arms holding you back and restraining you with an irritable huff and "I'll do it".

If you weren't allowed to do anything then you might as well do nothing.

Might as well just sit there and sulk.

Where the hell had your little nutjob gone? Why was he replaced by a mother hen incessantly clucking around you?

In the end, it was more pain that broke the tension.

Taehoon, in your opinion, flicks you excessively hard on the forehead. A truce, of sorts.

"I know I'm pissing you off. Be careful next time," he says, leaving you to your own devices.

A non-apology from anyone else, a half-apology because you know him.

So you continue to sit and you continue to sulk, only without the presence of your boyfriend next to you.

It feels surprisingly lonely.

Maybe you were too quick to let your temper get the better of you. After all, Taehoon was just trying to look after you, in his own way. It led to you both butting heads but it's the thought that counts.

If you consider it, what exactly are you complaining about? 'Oh no, my boyfriend wanted to make sure I was ok?' Actually, he was overbearing and a little too much. Still.

You grab your phone and reach out-

Y/N: thanks for looking after me

Taehoon: 👍

A thumbs up is good, a thumbs up means it's fine. You know he has no reservation about outright ignoring you.

And because you really do love and appreciate that asshole-

Y/N: love you

Taehoon: 👍

Not 2 minutes later-

Taehoon: ❤️

Taehoon: 🤡

[moongothic]

When exactly do you think Crocodile realized Luffy was his son? Like was it still in Impel Down? Couldn't Iva have told him Luffy was Dragon's son and Croc go 'ah, guess my ex had more kids'? Or was it when Sengoku announced it during the war?

Bc, the thing is, in order for Croc to conclude Luffy was his (since he didn't know Dragon's or his son's full names, cuz otherwise he would've recognized Luffy in Alabasta and not have tried to kill his son 3 times💀) the only clue Croc would've had would be Luffy's age /exact birth date. And for that to happen, my theory is that Iva mentioned to Croc that Luffy was Dragon's son, then on the ship towards Marineford Croc took a moment to ask Luffy what his age and birthday was, just out of curiosity.

But idk how well that ties into Croc's 180 during the war to help Luffy and save Ace that one time.

I doubt Iva-chan brought up the subject to Crocodile at all, they had more important things to worry about when escaping from Impel Down, and while there was downtime when sailing to Marineford, we see Iva-chan and Luffy talk about this; Luffy clarifies to Iva-chan that Ace isn't his blood-relative, when Iva-chan had been under the impression Ace was also Dragon's son

The key thing here is that Iva-chan was whispering

Which means Iva-chan wouldn't have wanted to let anyone else on the ship find out about Luffy being Dragon's son at this point. Thus, regardless of what history Croc has with Ivankov (and the Revs), I doubt they would've told Crocodile about Luffy and Dragon at this point (like Iva-chan went out of their way to mention how Crocodile couldn't be trusted in ID). Also considdering Jinbei didn't hear what Iva-chan said here, there should be no way Crocodile could've overheard this convo either.

So between that, and the actual Reveal Scene which I've discussed in the past (and specifically how sus it is that we don't see Croc's reaction), yeah I'm inclined to believe that's when Crocodile would've realized Luffy was his, at the begining of the war

And as I've also discussed in the past, considdering the circumstances that lead to Luffy being raised by Garp, and how Dragon (and Crocodile too) would've been well aware of that from the begining. I don't think Dragon would've ever remarried or had another child with anybody else, and most importantly, I'm sure Crocodile would've known that too. So the second Crocodile heard Luffy was Dragon's kid, he would've been hit with the realization that Luffy had to be his. Like Dragon would've been insane if he went and had another child after Luffy was born, or he would've had to been cheating on Crocodile and while Dragon may be a loser he surely wouldn't be that kind of a loser. Like the options would've been that either that really is Croc's baby boy, or there's some kind of a mistake and it's not their kid.

(Interestingly, Crocodile did seem to continue to pursue Whitebeard even after the announcement from Sengoku, and only began assisting after 1) the battle had moved onto the square, 2) WB got both stabbed and 3) his crew had proved themselves to be a pain in the ass for Crocodile. So it's possible Crocodile only changed his objectives because his original plan had gone sour. But also, Crocodile jumps in to protect Luffy from Mihawk immidiately after Luffy shows off his Conqueror's Haki. And like. I dunno, he hadn't been in a hurry to assist Luffy until then, so if Crocodile had been kind of waiting for something to actually confirm to him that Luffy really was Dragon's son and not some random, bizarrely sturdy child... Yeah, the dumbass having fucking Conqueror's Haki could be it, the confirmation Crocodile needed.)

[holocene-sims]

next // previous

august 26, 2021 12:50 a.m. square-k convenience store

[yunha] first of all, i would want dr. pepper.

[yunha] i don’t like sodas that much, but i love dr. pepper. it’s the kfc of sodas.

[grant] 11 secret herbs and spices? but liquid?

[yunha] exactly! it’s like cola and not cola, root beer and not root beer, spicy and not spicy.

[yunha] maybe it sounds dumb, but...

[grant] no, no, not at all! honestly, you're doing big-brain science over there, decoding all the flavors.

[grant] have you heard of hot dr. pepper?

[yunha] what?

[grant] hot dr. pepper. it’s a thing, i swear! like a sixties thing but some people are still into it. i'm not making it up.

[grant] and speaking of coffee and hot dr. pepper, one of my aunts drinks it in the morning instead of coffee.

[yunha] that’s so strange. why hot?

[yunha] won't it just lose the carbonation?

[grant] i don't know, i don't really want to partake in drinking it, but if i were a betting man, i would say yeah, that's probably the outcome.

[grant] anyway, continue! dr. pepper. i respect that. great choice. i'm loyal to faygo but i do fuck with dr. pepper.

[yunha] how can i continue after that sudden trauma?

[grant] would you like me to procure you a cold dr. pepper to rinse out the agony?

[yunha] no, it's okay!

[grant] well, the offer is still on the table! i'm not evil.

[yunha] anyway, the last part of my meal would be seolleongtang.

[grant] oh, that's ox bone stew, isn't it?

[yunha] yes! it's not even my favorite food, but if i knew my expiration date, i'd want to prepare it and eat it one more time.

[grant] why choose that then?

[yunha] it reminds me of my family. we had some, hm, difficult times, and i remember my dad making this for us, especially for my mom to improve her mood. it's actually her favorite food.

[grant] that's very sweet. like beyond sweet. it's more about invoking that feeling of love again than the literal food, yeah?

[yunha] of course. i would like to feel that love again and also share it, and thank my parents for everything.

[yunha] i wouldn't need anything else.

[grant] you really love your family.

[yunha] more than anything.

[yunha] okay, now tell me your final meal!

[grant] i can tell you the ideal one would not be as humble as yours.

[grant] i mean, my logic for myself is, like, alright, i'm about to slowly turn back into cosmic dust, with or without a consciousness somehow floating around the universe, so screw it, do whatever.

[grant] i'm already going "home," so why not go big?

[grant] so, it’s my last day on earth. i'm at my place chilling with my cat.

[yunha] you have a cat?

[grant] his name is turtle. he’s very cute. he wears sweaters. he was a stray. i picked him up years ago from underneath a dumpster at IHOP at two in the morning, and i nursed him back to health.

[yunha] aww, i always wanted a cat. like some cuddly, fat, fluffy cat.

[grant] you should get one! i highly recommend it.

[yunha] i can’t! not yet.

[grant] do you want to see a picture of turtle before i imagine my untimely death? funny, i was just saying to someone else earlier that i want a timely one.

[grant] there he is, right on my home screen.

[yunha] oh my goshhhhh, i love him.

[grant] he's the best. no joke. but again, last meal. turtle and i are chilling, and yeah.

[grant] i absolutely have to have my grandma’s macaroni and cheese. it’s perfection and also my favorite food of all time. uhh, let’s see, i think you almost always need potatoes with a meal. i'd be happy with my grandma’s colcannon, like mashed potatoes and cabbage. what else? i mean, not to talk about coffee again, but i do love it, so maybe a vanilla latte for liquid consumption. oh, and fuck, coconut cake is a must. that’s my grandma’s recipe, too

[grant] i'd also have pizza for sure. pineapple is nonnegotiable, it's going on there. pineapple, pepperoni, the whole works.

[yunha] so, you’re a big fan of dairy products and your grandma?

[grant] that about sums it up!

[yunha] did you, like, grow up on a dairy farm?

[grant] no, but my grandma did!

[yunha] ah, i see. it's all connected.

[yunha] so, you like talking about death?

[grant] i don't. it just seems to come up a lot accidentally.

[grant] but really, i asked you this question because it's just, i don't know, an interesting way to get at people's values in life?

[grant] and it was just what came out of my mouth first.

[yunha] we answered kind of similarly. what did you learn about me?

[grant] same values, different approaches, i'd say.

[yunha] by the way, my other value is pineapple belongs on pizza.

[grant] oh, thank god! finally, someone else agrees!

[yunha] corn is also really good as a topping.

[grant] man, i feel deprived now. where have you been the last thirty years? you could have told me such a feat of engineering exists!

[izzyspussy]

fic where Jamie does something that will piss his dad off (not hard to do) and it ends up in the public eye somehow. maybe it started that way and Jamie just wasn't thinking it through at the time - or he was and decided to do it anyway, or maybe somebody was supposed to keep their mouth shut and didn't, or maybe it's another data breach, but whatever it is it gets out and it gets in the news cycle.

and maybe Jamie thought he was handling it okay but then suddenly wasn't, or maybe he found out his laundry was being aired at training like the lads all found out about it happening to Keeley. regardless, he ends up rushing into the managers' office - the closest room with a semblance of privacy, despite being occupied - to have a brief but spectacular panic attack about it.

because it just happens to be something his dad is not going to let slide, something he won't be satisfied yelling at Jamie over the phone about. he's gonna come around to show Jamie by hand exactly how he feels about it.

when the coaches question him, Jamie gives the barest bones explanation he can manage. this is what came out, if you haven't heard, and I'm freaking out because my dad is gonna want to teach me a lesson about it.

"So what you're saying is you need a place to stay," Roy says. Not a question. An offer, actually, if you speak Kentese. But Jamie shakes his head resignedly.

"No," he sighs bitterly. "Probably'll need a day or two off training, though."

There's a long, horrible pause - a pause where Beard gets exactly what Jamie means and Ted and Roy want so bad not to that they don't.

"Let me see if I have this right," Beard says, more to force the issue on the other two than because he himself needs any clarification - or because he has the faintest pipe dream that spelling it out will make Jamie change his mind. "You're planning to take a beating?"

Bitter, still bitter, Jamie says, "He don't fucking give up more than I do. Let him get it out of his system, then it's over."

There's another pause - Beard doesn't know what to say to that - before Roy asks, "What if he lost?"

"Lost...?" Jamie repeats.

"To you," Roy explains. "You're saying if he shows up your house and you're not there he'll just keep coming round, yeah? What if he shows up and you beat his arse into the fucking ground like he deserves. Would he still come back then?"

"Self-defense," Beard assures no one in particular.

But Jamie shakes his head again, this time quick and jerky. "I can't-" he says. He throws a nervous, furtive look at Ted.

"He can fucking be wrong sometimes, Jamie," Roy snaps - gently, for Roy - catching on quick.

Jamie doesn't answer, but Ted himself nods. He says, calm as a cucumber, "I can't agree with the rest, but that part sure is true."

"You can," Beard tells Jamie. Also gently - for Beard. Jamie's mouth twists miserably.

"Yeah," he finally agrees. "But I fucking won't, will I?"

"You only think that because you haven't yet," Beard insists.

"That actually ain't true," Ted points out, carefully cheerful. "I didn't see much else after," he shifts uncomfortably, a bit guilty, "but you put that man on his back in Wembley."

"...Are you encouraging this?" Jamie asks him, too confused to be aghast. Ted leans forward on his desk to regard Jamie with a serious, slightly self-deprecating smile.

"Well, it's like Roy said, I can be wrong sometimes," he says. "And these two fellas seem to think this is one of those times. Now, they both wouldn't be here if I didn't trust their judgement." He sits back then, softly tosses up his hands, smiles a little wider. "So I'll keep my wrong opinion to myself."

Jamie huffs a small, genuine but still slightly unsure laugh at that. He hesitates for a moment longer, but then he squares up his shoulders and lifts his chin and turns to Roy.

"No," he says. "No, he wouldn't come back if I did that."

[mysticstarlightduck]

Big OC Questionnaire!

Gonna answer this one before I start today's writing session so here we go! Thanks for the tag, @the-golden-comet (here)!

Let's go with Adrien Rosetrom and Luke Katt (my ANGSTY bois who I adore) from my WIP Scrapyard Boys for this one! (:

What is your favorite thing to do to avoid responsibility?

Adrien - Eh, that one's pretty easy to answer dude. I just hole up in my apartment, lock the door, turn off the notifications on my phone, and then drink and smoke myself mindless while watching whatever's on TV. Sometimes I like watching the phone ring while not answering it just out of spite, that's fun. And if anyone I don't know tries to interrupt my peace they'll have a very sudden meeting with my baseball bat, if you get what I'm saying.

Luke - I just run off somewhere else until whoever or whatever I'm trying to avoid forgets about me or the dust settles. But that's only in more extreme cases - like if the cops are trying to get me or some gang wants to square up. Otherwise, I'm usually pretty responsible - I mean, I have to be, or else who the fuck is gonna take care of my little brother, or make sure my friends don't do some stupid shit again?

If you could choose anyone in the world to be your sibling who would it be?

Adrien - Don't even ask me that, dude (laughs bitterly). I've already got two half-siblings crashing at my apartment who show no intent on leaving me alone, I don't need anyone else leeching off my patience. (Begrudgingly) Fine, I actually do care for the two ankle-biters but don't let them find out or I'll never hear the end of it, dumbshit.

Luke - I'm not sure. Riley's my little brother and I would do anything to keep him safe - I've killed to protect him before, and I would do it again, even though it landed me in juvie for two years before I broke out. Valen - my best friend - and the other members of our little gang of chaos are also kinda like siblings to me by now, if I'm being fully honest, so there you have it.

What is the most sublime thing you have ever eaten and why?

Adrien - Sublime?! I'm not exactly an expert in high-cuisine, my dude. Most of my diet consists of like... cheap hamburgers, pizza, or nuggets. And a truckload of energy drinks. I guess a good dish of spaghetti with red sauce or a strawberry cupcake is as close as I'm gonna get to eating something "sublime." (chuckles)

Luke - I dunno, I know how to cook quite well but I rarely have like, the time and patience for it. I like microwave lasagna and chocolate cake covered with ganache, which are respectively my favorite dish and my favorite dessert, but that's about it.

What was the worst day of your life?

Adrien - I'm gonna be honest with you real quick: if I were going to answer that question in detail we would still be here talking this at this day and time next week. In short? Pretty much the majority of my days since I was kicked out, though the specific day I was kicked out of home and whenever my current boss decides to get too uh... handsy, for lack of a more 'family-friendly' word, are the runner-ups for Top 1 worst days of my life for sure.

Luke - I know most folks would expect the day I killed my abusive godfather to be the Number 1 Worst Day in my life but if I'm being frank... I kinda enjoyed it? Like really got a kick out of it (smiles widely). I know it sounds twisted and kinda insane to say, but I mean, the fucker had it coming, and knowing that he would never hurt Riley ever again was worth all the struggles that followed. I guess the actual worst day of my life was the day that followed when I was arrested and taken away from my little brother - but hey, I got out, and we're together again! So I say it was worth it.

What’s your worst nightmare?

Adrien - Being trapped in that fucking nightclub forever or being unable to pay off my debt to Zander so I can finally be free without fearing that the mob would skin me alive and feed me to the fishes. And as much as I hate admitting it - I guess now I kinda fear the twins will follow in my footsteps and end up hurt by my boss. It's kinda weird for me to admit and it does trip me out to think about how much I did change. Yeah, I know, I'm that pathetic.

Luke - Losing Riley and our friends, or them getting hurt in some way that I would be unable to heal them with my powers. And I don't fucking care who I have to kill to keep that from happening (laughs)

If a monster asked you your worst nightmare what would you tell it and why?

Adrien - Hell nah, man. I don't need anyone having that kinda power over me and my family, I know how that story ends and it ends with whoever was stupid enough to tell someone else their fears dead in a ditch. Not for me, pal! And let's say, if someone tried to use my fears against me, I would probably make their worst fear come true in the worst way possible, trust me on that.

Luke - Oh the 'monster' would have to spend a fucking fortune to recover from the damage I would do to them. You know I've done it before.

Would you give away secret information if tortured? Be honest.

Adrien - Honestly, I don't think I would give a damn either way but if that information was that important my captors would have one hell of a struggle getting it out of me - I'd probably lead them on with false hope that I'll talk and then don't say shit just so see the look on their faces, like, just to spite them and watch them losing their shit.

Luke - (chuckles darkly) Oh, how I'd love to see them try. If I'm going down, I'm taking their sanity with me, that's for sure.

Who could you trust most with a secret?

Adrien - Myself, and even then like... with a considerable, healthy concern, because you never know!

Luke - Probably my best friend, Valen - I know he would follow me to the depths of hell if need be, and I would do the same for him without a second thought. While I do trust Riley unconditionally, I'm not sure I wanna burden a twelve-year-old with the kind of secrets I keep, y'know.

You have been caught somewhere you shouldn’t be! Quick, what is your excuse?

Adrien - Dude, as if someone would be able to find me. If people were catching me slacking like that, I wouldn't be alive talking to ya right now, given the kind of company I usually keep. So in short: I'm almost always sneaking somewhere I shouldn't, but no one has caught me yet. That I know of.

Luke - Only like, all the time! Me and my friends are just that kind of trouble. Usually, I don't really make up an excuse, I just go "Oh, would you look at the time -", stun whoever found me, and just like, haul ass in the furthest direction as soon as possible.

How good is your sleep schedule?

Adrien - That'd better be a joke because my man you don't wanna know the answer to that. I'm a stripper working for the mob, do the math yourself how fucked up my whole schedule is at night. I usually go home at like, 3AM, on good days, crash on the couch, wake up sometime in the mid-morning if insomnia doesn't come to haunt me, down like three bottles of energy drinks and a cheap coffee, and then rinse and repeat the next day. If I sleep at all.

Luke - It's pretty good, especially when compared to some people I know. I go to sleep at like, 11PM, or 10.30PM, then sleep a solid 6 to 8 hours every day before waking up early. My powers require a lot of rest to recharge, and what kinda healer would I be if I didn't know how to take care of my own body?

Do you have any siblings?

Adrien - Already answered that but alright: I have two, half-siblings. They're twins who might as well be two gremlins coming to haunt my waking life. One's a boy, Rhys, and he's nice and all if his ideas didn't almost give me one heart attack per week, and the other one - the dangerously quiet one that is almost always up to some shady shit if she's out of sight - is a girl named Gwyn. Yes, I regret every life choice that led me to this situation and I'll probably end up grey before thirty.

Luke - Only one biological one, Riley - he's twelve. If you count my best friends then the list gets much longer, haha.

What’s the toughest time you had to endure growing up?

Adrien - Oh my time living old hag of a grandmother wasn't exactly paradise, putting it lightly. The nicest thing she and my grandfather ever did to me was kicking me out of the house at fifteen - and that led to a whole other hellish chapter.

Luke - Oh, you can take your pick. Being orphaned, moving in with our abusive, toxic bitch of a godmother and her husband, having to kill said husband when he got drunk and tried to hurt my kid brother (which would have probably killed Riley if I wasn't there), being arrested, breaking out of jail, helping Riley escape from that woman's house, then finally finding some friends and getting a semblance of normalcy.

What’s your relationship with your family like?

Adrien - Eh. Mother dearest dropped me off with my grandparents, then I got kicked out, and years later my estranged teenage half-siblings broke into my apartment one night and were like "Hey dude! We'll live with you now!". So yeah. Complicated is an understatement, huh.

Luke - Didn't really have a family other than Riley, though now, I would say that our group of friends are actually the closest thing to a real family we've ever had. They're great and honestly, I'm glad we met them!

Do you have any hobbies? If so, what ones?

Adrien - Watching TV, listening to music, sleeping. Drinking energy drinks. Smoking. Wandering around in the city thinking about what the fuck I'm doing with my life and having a breakdown --

Y'know, the usual.

Luke - I like sneaking into the movies when I can. I also love skateboarding, dancing, and playing the guitar. Oh, and watching those funny morning cartoons on TV, while eating cereal!

Do you dream often?

Adrien - Most nights, though they're usually not the coolest dreams. I usually wake up and like, turn on the TV to drown it out until I collapse back to sleep.

Luke - Eh, not really. And when I do I usually don't really remember them or they are just the... most unhinged, concerning, weirdest dreams that leave me thinking "Yep, I have seriously issues, huh" when I wake up, haha.

What do you dream about?

Adrien - Uh - Nope! Not answering that one for the sake of your peace of mind and what's left of my own pride.

Luke - When I do remember? Man, stuff like - a T-Rex dancing ballet while hopping in multicolored clouds in the sky, or some kind of weird gremlin creature following me through a musty hallway while singing "Peanut Butter Jelly Time!". Now you get what I meant by concerning?

Have you ever been in love?

Adrien - Romance is the oldest lie of all time, my friend, and its not one I'm that keen to fall for either. I'm gonna fall in love for what? To get disappointed? Nah, man, I'm good.

Luke - Not really, like in real life and stuff. I had a crush on some movie stars and pop singers when I was younger, but that's just teenage dreams, haha. I actually really want to meet someone I would fall in love with in real life, as cheesy as that sounds! I may be a killer, but I'm a killer who still wants a fairytale wedding with someone just as weird as me.

What is your least favorite thing in the world?

Adrien - Sex with strangers. The mob. My boss. People who put their hands where they don't belong because they're drunk and apparently I'm "supposed to like it". Stupid fuckers who bully others. Just the usual.

Luke - Abusive people. Rich people who think they can do whatever they want to others who are not as rich as them. The police and the shitty government of this shitty city.

What is your pet peeve?

Adrien - People who aren't hygienic or are just like... downright nasty and clearly need a good shower. Loud music. I also kinda hate how Gwyn chooses to watch a cheesy stand up comedy show on my TV at full blast in the morning and eating those crunchy potato chips on my couch which causes the crumbs to be everywhere, because -- FUCK'S SAKE SHE'S AT IT AGAIN HOLD ON - (gets up, running to his living room done with life)

Luke - People who don't look me - or others - in the eye while talking or who keep checking their smartwatch or phone in the middle of the conversation and then just answer you like "uhuh" or "yeah, that's wild". Like, yeah Karen, I'm fucking aware you didn't hear a single word that left my mouth and the fact I wasted five minutes trying to talk to you makes me wanna strangle that bad haircut out of your head.

Would you consider yourself different?

Adrien - Different than what? Everyone's unique in their own way. And I ain't about to be no "pick-me" dude that's always like "Oh, I'm so quirky, look how different I am from all the other bland humans", or like dramatically, "I'm just weird, you wouldn't get me". Hell nah.

Luke - I guess I am kinda different than most teens my age. Because like, let's be honest, who else do you know that has killed someone at fourteen, has extreme regeneration powers, and undermines the government with a group of other fucked up teenagers? Though I don't know if this is a good or bad thing, that's too philosophical of a question to answer.

How far would you go to save a loved one?

Adrien - I may be a heartless bitch but I would actually go pretty damn far to keep those twins safe. Like, for example - hypothetically: Does the mob want to "upgrade" my job from stripper to whore in exchange for their safety? Uncomfortable but yeah, fine, I'd do it. Do I need to beat up someone who is threatening my siblings? Oh, yeah, that someone is gonna wake up with their face smushed in by my baseball bat. Do I need to blackmail a billionaire who basically owns the country (this one I actually did so its not hypothetic)? Sure, I've done weirder shit before.

So you get the idea. I may be vicious, but I ain't disloyal.

Luke - I've killed a man with my bare hands, and I would do it again, and again, and again, if I needed to. And I don't regret it one bit. Do I need to say more? (smiles dangerously, with that feral guard dog aura to him)

Would you team up with your worst enemy if it was your only option?

Adrien - I kinda already do that every day already, so yeah, sure. Fuck it, we'll be besties and braid each other's hair if I get to live another day, I don't give a shit.

Luke - Oh hell no, I'd rather they just put a bullet through my brains than ever team up with those fuckers.

What is the worst insult you can give?

Adrien - I already swear like a sailor on a daily basis, so I have a pretty wide dictionary of insults. But I ain't sure what would be the worst one, and I don't got enough time to figure that out either.

Luke - (Tilts his head, with a smirk) I think littering their body with wounds using my power would get the message across better than any words ever could, don't you think?

What is the nicest thing someone could say to you?

Adrien - I dunno. Like, I'm not a sentimental kinda dude, but I think I would be pretty fucking happy if someone just acknowledged that I'm doing my best. I think hearing an earnest, "Hey, dude, you matter to me!" with no strings attached actually would be pretty nice.

Luke - I'm not quite sure (chuckles awkwardly). I guess that just being loyal and kind and spending quality time with me - just like, actually being there when I need someone, would matter more to me than any words ever could.

Are you a jealous person?

Adrien - Oh hell yeah, you bet your ass I am!

Luke - Not really. I don't like being betrayed or deceived, but other than that I think I'm a pretty chill dude. I'd hate to be overbearing.

Have you ever committed a crime?

Adrien - Yeah, all the time. How else would I get by in this stupid rathole of a city I'm stuck in huh? And working for the mob, committing crimes kinda does come with the territory, in a way.

Luke - (laughs drily) Are you seriously asking me that question?

Are you neat or messy?

Adrien - I ain't got the time or patience to be organized, so I guess messy it is. Not dirty though, I hate dirt. Just chaotically disorganized.

Luke - I guess I'm pretty organized, now that I think about it. Not over-the-top, interior designer-like organized, but at least a bit above the bare minimum most days.

How do you feel about crying? Let it out or hold it in?

Adrien - Cry? Nah. I just hold it in like a pressure cooker, laugh it off, drink my sorrows away until I collapse on the floor of my kitchen, wake up with the worst hangover of my life, and then be like "Let's go get some fast food!" like nothing happened.

Luke - It's normal and healthy, I just don't do it very often or in front of others. I like to be the rock they can rely on, and so I usually don't.... burden them with my feelings unless I have to. I cry quite often when I'm alone and the stress gets to me.

Who do you live for? Why?

Adrien - Myself, because throughout this shitty life, I've been pretty much the only one I can trust. (sighs) And yeah, fine, now I live for the twins too, because like it or not I really fucking care about those two gremlins, probably more than I should.

Luke - For my little brother, Riley, and our group of friends.

What style of accessories do you wear? Is it willingly?

Adrien - I like sunglasses, earrings, actual rings, and occasionally a necklace or two. I also like simple makeup - not the glittery one that makes my eyes water with allergies and Zander likes so fucking much - just like, eyeliner, nail polish, lip gloss. I may be broke but I like to look stylish when I can. My personal style is willing. The gaudy and glittery accessories and persona I put on for Zander's stupid show? That shit's not really willing but I don't get a choice, now do I?

Luke - I have a lot of tattoos, most of them on my arms. I also love wearing metal rings with cool designs, and leather and plastic bracelets, and I have a few, small ear piercings. It's willing, and I like having control of my style. It gives me certainty about my personality and I adore that.

Tagging (gently): @sleepy-night-child, @kaylinalexanderbooks, @smol-feralgremlin, @oh-no-another-idea, @littleladymab,

@winterandwords, @eccaiia, @sarahlizziewrites, @illarian-rambling

@agirlandherquill, @anoelleart, @ray-writes-n-shit

@writernopal, @anyablackwood, @unstablewifiaccess, @forthesanityofstorytellers, @finickyfelix

@i-can-even-burn-salad, @cakeinthevoid,

@lassiesandiego, @thepeculiarbird, @clairelsonao3, @memento-morri-writes, @starlit-hopes-and-dreams

@wyked-ao3 and OPEN TAG

[winters-rose-daughterofcain]

My favourite quotes from my lottienat fic because almost no one saw the last chapter and I'm low key really proud of it lol

"Lottie loves so many broken things. She loves things that hurt her and damage her and stitch her back up, she loves things full of rot and ruin, and she knows she would sacrifice her very self for them. She knows broken doesn’t mean unlovable, but Malcom Matthews clearly doesn’t agree."

"She’s crying blood. Her organs are rusting. Her body is decaying. The animals will smell her. They will come, they will hunt her, they will take her, they will eat her. Consumption. Sacrifice for the fractured girl as they mount her body, as they drink her blood, as she provides iron tears and lies (truths?) lies her mutilated mind believes. And she will let them, she will-"

"It seems unfair almost, that something so pretty and pure should be destroyed with such violence. But life wasn’t fucking fair especially not for fragile things. "

"She was also a girl built for deafening love and silent sacrifice. An angel of chipped black nail polish and bloody knuckles and a heart that loved deeply enough to drown. A siren of rough edges and unconditional devotion."

"It’s comforting in a way, that someone will always see her in her plainest state. No lights or flash or ornamentation. Natalie will always see her as a girl. Nothing more, nothing less. It’s tenderness in a way she’s not sure what to do with, vulnerability in a way that keeps her eyes on the road as she reaches into her pocket and wordlessly hands her lighter over."

"Take anyone else's burden and Natalie Scatorccio will meet it square jawed and unflinching. She had always done the hard thing without a single complaint, glaring into an unwanted spotlight and plunging wrist deep in decay to ensure the job was done. Make it her own problem however, and the running starts. A scared child, a slaughter ready lamb, a damaged collection of fear and love and good intent."

"She feels a second away from being devoured, pray ready and waiting for consumption. Only it’s another pray waiting for her, looking at her like a one more burden will send it crumbling down in unsteady collapse. But maybe pray is too innocent. Maybe it’s predator on predator, maybe they’ve both lost their meaning. Nat’s eyes flick down, just for a moment, and Lottie feels like floating. "

"But they were still the same people they always were. Broken, damaged, ruined. Natalie couldn’t talk Lottie to safety. Lottie couldn’t talk Nat into seeing that she was worth something, that broken things were lovable as long as they weren't called Charlotte Matthews. And yet she tries. Like a pretty, useless show pony with only one trick."

"Lottie is selfish to the core, cold poison latching onto her heart and pumping itself around her brain. The passivity of her mother and the cruelty of her father leaves her with a deadly combination. For herself or others she’s still not sure, she can’t know. She doesn’t want to. "

"She thinks the heat might spread then, from forehead to fingertips to cheek to hips. Maybe that would be enough to heat her into something solid, something permanent, something whole. Maybe she just wants Nat. She doesn’t know exactly what that says."

"Lottie’s been freezing all her life, she’s sick of running from fire. She wants to be burnt alive. She wants to be melted and drunk from her lips down, from her broken brain and worthless selfish heart. She wants Natalie Scatorccio to burn her alive, with all the tenderness and care of the storm in her eyes, with all the sacrifice of an unwilling love. She wants it to be willing for her. She wants her. She wants-"

Link if you're interested:

[zalrb]

Can you elaborate on how Zuko's rage in NATLA was removed/lessened? I didn't notice that so I'm curious what stood out to you.

Also, why do you hate the dialogue scene between Aang and Zuko and the talk Aang had with Katara and Sokka about what he learned from Zuko afterwards?

For the second part, did you read this post? If so, what exactly about it do you need clarification on with regards to why I hated the dialogue scene?

For the first part, I don't really know if I can expand in a way that makes it clearer, just that I felt that the actor played Zuko like he was a teenager who is irritated that he's on a family trip and he doesn't want to engage with anyone and just wants to sit at the back of the car and listen to his music

and there are elements of that in the animation, for sure

part of what makes Zuko a compelling character is that he IS still just a teenager who is dramatic like a teenager in a way that can be comical but he actually has inner turmoil of epic proportions, which fuels him, which gives him an almost frightening kind of drive (which the show also weakens because he's not as active in NATLA since Iroh points the way a lot)

because his honour, his home, his legacy, the love that he is so desperately chasing from his father is all wrapped up in this mission to capture Aang, and succeeding means dooming the world to colonization and genocide so there's also Iroh gently trying to get him to understand the implications of that while guiding him into taking steps to becoming a more compassionate and considerate person and all of that can get entwined with confusion and desperation and resentment and frustration and anger,

which then gets entwined and/or becomes this sort of underlying rage that this whole thing is happening at all

and all of that nuance, I didn't see in NATLA's Zuko, and it's hard for an actor to portray all of that especially when the writing isn't helping them out. I think it requires a certain amount of experience or some spectacular raw talent, which is also one of the reasons I was like, just keep it at the animation.

Because when Zuko is supposed to be fighting down his anger in NATLA it just looks like he's keeping himself from having a fit,

even the delivery of "are you seriously going to allow..." is barely incredulous, it's huffy

particularly since the show doesn't actually allow for rage not just anger but rage in general to be demonstrated, which I spoke about before because in the animation when he's spoken back to Zuko squares up to fight, Zuko is always ready to fight someone, and Iroh has to calm Zuko down

I think because the fandom including myself pokes fun at Zuko for being an angsty king a lot, sometimes the intensity of the rage he'd be feeling can get toned down or played off but for the most part, it's this corrosive emotion that he deals with all the time, which is why when he joins Team Avatar he explicitly says he doesn't want to rely on hate and anger for drive anymore

and the animation shows this intensity through the expressions

but also his actions, which NATLA toned the fuck down. He's just kinda moody and sullen

So, another example, when Zhao in NATLA is like, we're going to start looking for the Avatar, Zuko takes a step forward

In the animation, he needs to be held back. From an adult perspective, depending on the adult, a teenager charging at you might be amusing but if we're aligned with Zuko, he's enraged

and because rage is a journey for Zuko, when he bests Zhao at the agni kai he's being the bigger person but when Zhao isn't being the same, Zuko needs to be held back again and Iroh needs to coach him away from letting his rage taint his honourable victory

If you listen to Zuko in the pilot, when he goes to the Southern Water Tribe and he's like I DON'T WANT ANY CALMING TEA, it's not a sulk, it's not i dOn'T wAnT aNy CaLmInG tEa, he's angry that Iroh appears not to be taking this seriously.

99% of the time Zuko is meant to be 'angry' or driven or insistent or stubborn or one-track-minded in NATLA, it comes out as whining

even when his little yell in this scene had me like, so, like, no fire is coming out to emphasize his frustration or anything?

Anyway, I can't explain my thoughts more than this haha.

[pseudolife-archived4]

every once and a while on my personal blog i'm reminded of this interview from 2022 where elliot talks about how happy he is to see someone "who looks like me, or identifies like me being celebrated as a hero." in reference to gaz. implying he's gay. and i start to cry because it really be like that. gaz is gay. gaz is gay in canon, and elliot actively ships gazprice. and then i think about CANON LESBIAN KATE LASWELL talking about her fucking WIFE. and bisexual alejandro as confirmed by alain mesa. and how fuckin, neil actively goes out of his way to search and like soapghost on twitter (please, we have ALL SEEN THE LIKES, THE REPOSTS, THE UNPROMPTED AND EXCITED TALKING ABOUT IT) and how sam is EXACTLY IN THE SAME BOAT (and i suspect this is why soap was killed because YA CANT HAVE GHOST BE GAY NOPE he is the cishet male fantasy character despite... everything.), and that yulian ACTIVELY searches the makarov tags on social media (please note: NOT HIS NAME. AND NOT #MAKAROV BUT SIMPLY JUST MAKAROV AND MWIII) and SHARES ALL THE ART INCLUDING GAY SHIP ART with his fans in a group chat in instagram (YES BITCH, I AM IN THAT AND YES BITCH, HE GIVES OUT CREDIT. AND IF HE IS ALERTED TO STOLEN ART, HE CORRECTS HIMSELF IMMEDIATELY AND GOD I LOVE YULIAN MORE THAN I LOVE BREATHING) BUT HE DOESN'T HAVE TO DO THAT. HE DOESN'T HAVE TO DO ANY OF IT??? He also ACTIVELY LIKES art he's not even tagged in with ships with Makarov and other characters in the series. (1, 2) (he also.. likes ghostsoap???? again an unprompted LIKE ON TWITTER) but also that stefan (nikolai) has actively liked and retweeted nikprice art before and also he's really into the deadpool/colossus ship and that's a WHOLE ASS OTHER THING SURE BUT LMAO I LOVE! SUPPORTIVE! ACTORS!

I guess what I'm trying to get at is this: COD was probably not made intentionally for us, but the cast has made it so, of their own free will.

They've taken military propaganda and remixed it square enix style for people who don't get to see themselves represented in media ever, especially as heroes. (allow me to borrow Elliot's wording, it's so so so important okay.)

Well, except Vova Makarov.

And, yanno, the fact that the boys are literal war criminals. But you know what I mean aha.

THE CAST HAS MADE THIS A WELCOMING SPACE FOR THE LGBT+. AND THAT'S SO FUCKING RAD.

AND SOMETIMES I THINK WE NEED TO SIT BACK AND THINK ABOUT HOW COOL THAT IS. BECAUSE NOT A LOT OF OTHER FANDOMS AND SHIP SHIT IN MEDIA GET THAT KIND OF SUPPORT???

SO. NO MORE SHIP WARS. ONLY APPRECIATION FOR THIS CAST AND HOW GREAT THEY FUCKING ARE.

but also for fucks sake can i get some yuri content that man was so barking hot i'm still fuming about it.

[trashcanwithsprinkles]

Archon war anon

I'm fairly certain that canon implies that Xiao didn't have too many masters, but I'm just having fun with it. I haven't hot potatoed him too much in what I have written, but I'm planning to pass him off for a bit to a bunch of Sumeru tribes who don't actually know what to do with an adeptus, and so just keep trading him off for benefits based on the idea that he's definitely got value, but they don't know what to do with him. I'm also doing this so that Morax later names him after himself? Like, "Xiao" is pretty Chinese sounding, and it would be weird for another land to have used it as a name. That in itself means nothing, bu I was like, "A perfect opportunity to make things weird!"

I did go check Cuijue architecture before I wrote the last ask and was all suspicious about it since I noticed that circle out front had that same square pattern as Guili stuff, but the pillars were very distracting!

We actually do know of gods to do with dreams - the Sumer Companion gods! But, they're obviously not in Liyue, and also not in Chenyu. The most I could find for the god of Chenyu Vale was the line "she made many dreams come true" in An Ancient Sacrifice of Sacred Brocade. Fujin and the others betrayed their god because they wanted to keep the humans safe, and the god was going to flood Chenyu Vale as a last ditch attempt to fight Morax.

The Dunyu-star connection comes from the Records of Jueyun book. The book also says "the redoubts of the Dunyu Valley stood tall and maintained prosperous relations with Liyue Harbor up till 500 years ago"

Very fair about thinking that the stone ruins all have to be old, but at the same time, given what I know about how ruins tend to work, they seem way too intact to be as old as all that? Like, people would have take all of that nice, preworked stone, because that's what people do. Like sure, some of them are kind of far, but then any quarries are also probably pretty far. Especially since Guili looks so much more ruined?

Tianqiu does look pretty temple-like, but also they kind of remind me of this documentary I saw talking about shitty Roman apartments? Like windowless and damp and all that because you spent basically all your time away. And even if it was a temple, temples need like staff to take care of them and priests? It looks big enough that it would probably need a proportionately big staff. I don't know, I'm not actually invested in this theory, it's just kind of fun to think about/argue.

As for when Guizhong died, yeah no confirmation on exactly when, but still at least 1700 years before the war ended.

What I could find on the move to the harbour was mostly referring back to one of the books - Stone Tablet Compilations - which was pretty vague, saying the war killed Guizhong, and "thereupon" Morax took their people to the harbor. And then the event that talked about the flood doesn't mention Guizhong dying, but in it Madame Ping does seem fairly specific about the actual move only taking a dozen days? Like, longer than you'd expect for that short distance, but not a "have to re-gather everyone" type situation (but honestly re-gathering would be really interesting to explore? and I want to see where you got that impression from) The teaser Echoes of the Heart mentions Guizhong's death and implies it was early in the war, but not how it happened or what was going on with their people after. And that's all I could find referring to her death specifically, so yeah, we know nothing. :(

I'm glad it wasn't too much!

no worries, it wasn't too much!

yeah i'm also fairly certain xiao only had one master before morax, but the concept is really interesting (and kinda funny). the idea of him winding up in sumeru and the gods there being like: "you want this magic kid?" "what does he do?" "idk but he's magic so he must be valuable" "you're right, i'll take him" .... "you want this magic kid?" fucking hilarious ngl

my only point of contention (that sounds ultra serious what) with the roman appartment point is that this is liyue? so i'm not sure they'd have a random ruin with no explanation be something that we wouldn't expect from a completely different culture? i guess it could always just be an adaptation though. but yeah, if it was a temple, there'd deffinitely be people living there. if not there, then in the surroundings – i'm just not sure if that would qualify as an entire town, more than just a temple complex. anyway, i've not no smoking gun on tianqiu valley either, we just know so little, but it is fun to throw things at the wall hahah

i have to be honest in that i completely forgot about madame ping's dialogue in moonlight merriment. like i had done the research on this mess for cyanide before that event came out? and since i wasn't even going to get to the founding of liyue harbor in the fic, i didn't bother changing my notes. but yeah, if madame ping says it took more than ten days (original chinese text), then yeah they probably migrated as soon as the flood took over. thankfully the cinematic specifies it was the guili assembly – knowing mihoyo they could've just left it as 'a flood destroyed their home' and never clarified LMAO like even then obviously it would've been the assembly, but still. unless i'm just missing stuff from the original chinese text, it doesn't, however, specify that it took them over ten days to get to the harbor. like it says the adepti stayed with them for ten days, but not how long their journey actually was? it was probably ten days, the harbor isn't all that far from the assembly and it'd be weird for the adepti to just... leave them halfway through the journey, but still. this is what i mean by the lack of clarification being a pain in the ass ToT

the scattering and gathering part actually comes from the guili plains' viewpont. it says "those who gathered here were once again scattered" in reference to the war destroying it. 'scattered' doesn't sound to me like a term you'd use for "there was a flood and so they fled together in a group with the adepti". it sounds more like "everyone fled to different places during the chaos, and then either morax gathered all of them back together to then migrate as a group immediately after it happened (like as soon as the flood settled morax was like "ok where's everyone"), or he took longer to gather them (like longer than ten days)". there's also the issue of the geo travel diaries? which like- i know morax being the god of the stove was disproven, but i'm not sure if that disproves the entire legend? which implies that people had to re-learn how to fucking cook when they first settled in the harbor. that might just be weird wording though, and since it's a word-of-mouth legend, also exaggeration.

the worst offender here i think is zhongli's dialogue during his first story quest. we know he's a little shit sometimes, but he's not known to outright lie when it comes to debating the history of liyue – he even goes out of his way to debate things that have become twisted by time if he finds himself in the conversation (because for some reason he also sometimes just lets the misconceptions be? which- i mean sure, he probably realizes it's an impossible task to try and fix every single erroneous tale in liyue). but when the scholars he's arguing with ask him if it's true that the lord of geo taught the people how to build houses when liyue harbor was being constructed (and how the model he used was made from mora), zhongli just says that yeah that's true. like ????? this either implies that the people didn't know how to build houses by the time they got to the harbor? as though they had been separated for so long that they had to re-learn it (which would make no sense if less than two weeks ago they'd been living in this advanced civilization that they'd built)?? like entire generations had passed??? or like- this could also be that zhongli taught them a new style of houses, going by the fact the architecture is not like the one in the assembly. given we now have madame ping saying it was more than ten days between the fall and the harbor, my only guess is that morax went 'hey i think we should try a new building style, how about this?' and made a harbor house as we know them entirely out of mora, and the people went 'ooo teach us how'. i guess there's always the possibility that, since the way it's worded in the dialogue (i don't have the originla chinese for this i'm afraid), that zhongli is saying that the fact the model house was made of mora is true, and not that he had to teach everyone how to make houses from scratch all over again. it could be that?? it's still weird.

it could always also be a case of all these things are from very early in the game, and since madame ping in moonlight merriment is the latest data we have, hers is probably more accurate? like they hadn't yet quite decided how long it was before the fall and the harbor, and that's why all the sources say different things.

still weird, though.

[ask-the-badman]

“That’s true. Well, I’ll be out here waitin’ for ya then. Can’t exactly go in covered in someone else’s blood.” I chuckled, pushing the man who’d already started to stiffen up into the floorboard. Picking my feet up, I quickly roll the passenger side window up and then the driver side. Thankfully the windows are slightly tinted, so no one will be able to see especially once night fully hits. “Go get ‘em slaughter. M’ready to see what ya got up your sleeve.”

I popped the door open and leaned up off the seat to give him a soft kiss on his cheek before closing it once more. Hands sat on the steering wheel, head swimming as I waited to watch him walk in. And in the meantime, I’d try and at least get some spatter off of my face.

"Much appreciated, darlin'. I'll bag a good'un, jus' fer you." Johnny winked before heading off around the building towards the main entrance, glancing around to be sure no one suspected anything.

Pleased to find it nice and quiet as he casually strolled up to the door to pull it open, just barely getting it halfway before some half drunk guy came stumbling out. Slamming their shoulder into his arm as they were much shorter but with enough force to actually startle him as he blinked at the man.

"Watch where yas goin'... fag." They said the last part under their breath, grumbling about pink shirted, lipstick wearing, pretty boy queers. All while stumbling off.

His eyes widened faintly but so did his signature half grin, finding his target and so quickly too as he spoke up, "What was that?"

They turned around real quick, apparently looking for a fight as they sneered up at him, "You heard me, faggot! Watch. Where. Yas. Goin'!"

"You ran inta me."

"Yeah? Well yer gonna be runnin' inta my's fist!!"

The short drunk then took a swing at him, aiming at his face and completely missing when he took an easy step back but came in with his own fist to slug them square in the nose. It sent them sprawling to the ground, hands over their nose, shouting in pain and cussing Johnny out.

"My nose! Ya plum broke my nose!! Ya goddamned sonavabitch!"

"Oh, I'll be doin' more'an that..."

The scarred man chuckled darkly while slowly walking over to them and grabbed the back of their collared shirt to start dragging them the long way around the back of the building. Just to avoid the front windows and away from any curious onlookers. All the way back to his truck and the one Kat was currently sitting in as they kicked and screamed at him before tossing them to the ground.

Right in view for her to watch.

"The fuck you drag me all the way back here fer-" They froze up once he unsheathed his blade from the back loop of his jeans, gulping visibly as they raised up one bloody hand, "He-hey now, I- I- I didn' mean nothin's by whats I said, mister! Honest! Yer no fag! Please! I din' mean it!"

"Oh, but ya did. Ya also could'a apologized fer bumpin' inta me, but here we are." His eyes flickered up to Kat as his grin grew sadistic and toothy while slowly approaching the drunk, "But hey, I'm merciful. If ya give me a big 'ol kiss, I'll let ya leave."

"F-fuck you!" They shouted before quickly scrambling up onto their feet.

Though not quick enough as Johnny rushed in and plunged his blade right into their back just below the ribs, making them gasp out in pain. The scream to follow quickly being covered up by a thick gloved hand grabbing at their mouth to muffle it before pulling the blade out then stabbing it back into another spot on their side. In and out. Between ribs as he cozied up to their back then finishing off with a quick and clean slice to their throat. Blood seeping between his gloved fingers as his victims eyes rolled up.

"Mm mm mmm.." He hummed while leaning his chin on their shoulder, lifting his blade up enough for Kat to see as he licked the blood of the edge. Then giving her a little wave with a couple of fingers still holding his knife. A pleased little grin on his face.

[banannabethchase]

Pulling the Tide to My Body - also on AO3

~

Seth comes to visit Mox and he's…different. Seth likes it.

~

DON'T LOOK AT ME. Alpha/beta/omega square on my bingo board board (N5) you are done but at what cost. The worst bit of this is it started as my werewolf square but as I was writing I was like, "…this is less werewolfy and more omegaverse? I think?" It's my first time ever writing A/B/O why did I add that square why did I choose to do blackout why do I think this is a good idea. Please let me know if I'm missing any tags, as well! Anyway. What a way to start my morning. Title from Moonlight Magic by Ashnikko.

~

Seth was planning on a relatively chill evening. Go to his partner’s work, cuddle up on a locker room couch, watch the matches from backstage. Maybe make out on company time. He figured it would be an easy day.

So imagine his surprise when he pushes open the door to the BCC locker room to find Mox rolling his shoulders and baring his teeth like he’s midmatch.

“Um,” Seth says, freezing as the door clicks shut behind him. “What did you guys do to my boyfriend?”

“Oh, thank god,” Wheeler Yuta says, exhaling. “Seth, we got no clue what happened. We had a trios match with the House of Black and, like,” he gestures to Mox, “well.”

Seth takes in the moment. Mox still hasn’t noticed he’s in the room yet, and then his head snaps up.

“Seth!” Mox says. He runs at Seth, tackling him to crash into the door. "You really are here!"

“Ow, hi,” Seth winces. “Jesus, that can’t have felt good against the belt.”

“You’re here,” Mox says, nuzzling into Seth’s neck, biting down gently. His hands twist around Seth’s championship belt, brushing up against Seth’s stomach. He feels himself blush pink, and Yuta averts his eyes. “Mine is here. I knew it. Hi.”

Seth laughs, a little strained. “Yeah, baby, you knew I was coming.” He looks up to Claudio as Mox’s tongue laves against his neck. “Okay, seriously, what the fuck is going on?”

“We – he went, like, werewolf,” Yuta says. “I think?”

“I have a theory,” Claudio says, looking strange. “Um, the House of Black have -”

“Powers, yeah,” Seth says, grabbing Mox’s hands and pinning them to his sides to keep him from going any lower in front of his friends. “They cursed me once to have flat hair for, like, two months. It sucks.”

“Brody King barks, occasionally, in the ring,” Claudio continues, like Seth never interrupted. Seth resists the urge to roll his eyes. Just like old times. “And Mox stepped up to him while he was attempting to get the crowd involved.”

“Growled right in his face,” Yuta says, and he sounds almost impressed. “It would have been cool if, in that moment, Malakai hadn’t taken the opportunity to kick me in the face.”

“That witchy young lady was saying strange words and wiggling her fingers around.” Claudio frowns. “She must have cast some sort of spell. He now seems,” Claudio pauses, like he’s searching for the word, “more animalistic? As if he has additional senses, almost.” He frowns. “He started saying none of us smelled like ‘his’, whatever that means. He’s clearly been bespelled.”

“Yeah. No shit, Sherlock.” Seth, with the help of Yuta’s arms around Mox’s waist, manages to get Mox off of him. Mox looks up at him with sweet eyes, sitting criss cross on the couch. His fingers don’t leave Seth’s belt, don’t stop stroking Seth’s skin underneath. “How do we make it stop?”

“Are you mad?” Mox asks. He’s fucking pouting, which is baffling. Seth is used to being the one pouting. But it doesn’t feel exactly like Seth’s way of pouting. It feels different. “Please don’t be mad, Seth.”

“I’m not mad,” Seth says, and he’s mildly disturbed by how automatically he reaches out and rubs at the top of Mox’s head. Mox beams at him, then lets his eyes flutter closed. Seth turns to Yuta and Claudio. “Give me back my boyfriend.”

“He’ll be – look, he’ll be better soon, I’m sure,” Yuta insists. “This stuff wears off, right?”

“Does it?” Mox asks. “I don’t want it to.” He leans in, nose pressed to Seth’s stomach. “God, you smell so good. I want to –” Mox pauses and leans back, looking at the other two people in the room, and slowly withdraws his fingers from Seth’s waistband. He stands, and his shoulders are tensed like he’s holding something back. “I’m fine, guys. I’m normal.” He leans in and inhales deeply at Seth’s neck. He shivers, full body, then pulls back. His eyes are blown black. “Uh. I might not be normal.”

“You’re never normal,” Seth says. “But this is different.” He eyes Mox, trying to see if there’s something different in his face, or his eyes. Something that would explain what’s going on. But he can’t find anything out of the ordinary. “You sure you’re not just being extra weird today?”

“I – yeah, but no?” Mox sighs. “There’s this weird, I don’t know, urge in the back of my mind I can’t seem to resist.” He looks at Seth with burning heat in his eyes. “I really need – I feel like…” He trails off, eyes squeezing shut. “Fuck. Seth, I feel like I’ve – like – I can’t explain it, but you’re one way and I’m another and I have to fuck you about it.”

Seth flushes pink. “Alright, well, let’s keep it under control around your friends.”

Claudio laughs. “Don’t worry, Seth, this is hardly the first time Mox has been indelicate around us.”

“Indelicate?” Yuta asks. “Are you kidding me? Seth, when you were overseas, we walked into the locker room to find Mox, out in the open, watching your match with his hand on his –”

“Okay,” Mox says, grabbing Yuta by the shoulders. “You and Claudio are leaving while I work this out with my boyfriend, yes?”

“What if you bite him and he becomes a sniffing puppy-man, too?” Yuta asks, poking his head around Mox’s shoulders. “Seth, if you become a dog-man, too, are you guys gonna have puppies?”

“Goodbye!” Mox says, slamming the door. He turns, a heat in his eyes. “Get naked.”

“Alright, down boy,” Seth says. He can’t say he isn’t flattered by the expression in Mox’s eyes, the way it’s clear Mox would like to devour him, soul and flesh, right now. But there’s a lot going on. “Calm down. Tell me more about the urge.”

“You’re really gonna make me – ugh, fine.” Mox sits down, flexing his hands. “We had that match an hour ago, and then, all of a sudden I got this…thing, in the back of my mind. I felt like I didn’t fit in my skin, like everything was too loud and too bright and too…” he trails off and looks up at Seth. “I could smell everyone, Seth. It was bizarre. It was like I could – like I could sense what everyone was doing, almost.” He looks away, biting his lip. “I could tell Hangman and Matt were fucking in the EVP room.”

“Oh.” Seth blinks. “Wow. That’s – a lot. Sounds wolfy to me, though.”

He shakes his head. “Not – I don’t feel like – not exactly? When you got to the venue, I could smell you, from the other side of the place. It was different than the other smells.” He steps up to Seth, pushing him against the door. “I could tell it was something mine.” Mox licks his lips, eyes locked on Seth. “Think you’ll get these powers, too, if I bite you?”

“I mean, I never say no to that.”

Seth finds himself under Mox, gripping at his shoulders, getting the fuck of his life. Mox goes at his neck without mercy, biting down.

“God,” Seth pants, “I kinda like you like this.”

Mox growls as he lets go of Seth’s neck. “Mine,” he says, eyes laser focused. “Mine.”

“Yours,” Seth promises. He thinks it soothes some of the fire inside of Mox, just a little.

Mox calms down, after, when Seth is covered in his own come and full of Mox’s. But he’s still being weird, drawing swirls in the mess on Seth’s chest. “I think,” Mox says, watching his finger move like he’s hypnotized, “I could get used to this.”

“I could, too, if you let me up so I could shower.”

Mox wrinkles his nose. “You won’t smell like me anymore, though.”

“We’ll test the theory.”

They make it halfway through washing Seth’s hair before Mox’s eyes blow again.

“Not enough,” Mox says, panting. “I – I need to.” He grabs Seth’s ass, nails biting down. “I need you again.”

“Yeah, course,” Seth says, pretending this isn’t his dream to be craved at all times, for someone to need him so bad they can’t resist and won't let him go. “All yours.”

Seth gets fucked again up against the shower wall, oversensitive and nerves singing.

“I wish other people could do this,” Mox murmurs before anchoring his teeth in Seth’s neck.

“Fuck me?” Seth asks, face pressed against the cool tile. “We could arrange that.”

“Smell like I can,” he clarifies. He grips at Seth’s hips, hard enough to leave bruises. Seth might have to advocate for hip windows in his next gear, make sure everyone can see Mox’s art. “That way they’d know I’m all over you.”

Mox makes sure Seth comes again, even though it’s hard and overwhelming and startling, and pulls out to shoot ropes all over Seth’s ass. Mox rubs it into Seth’s skin.

“That should do it,” Mox says, almost more to himself. “Leave it on you. So I can tell.” He grabs Seth’s shoulder and spins him. “So I always know.” Mox’s eyes have settled, a little, now.

“Always,” Seth promises, cupping Mox’s cheek. “Are you feeling more yourself now?”

Mox nods slowly. “I think so. At least, a little more so. I can still smell it. Can still feel it. But it’s like the worst of it is out of my system.”

They dress slowly and touch fingertips and skin from time to time. They have time before they have to leave for the hotel, and Seth lets himself enjoy the silence before they go out to see their friends.

In the hallway, they wave and make conversation, but Mox is clingier than usual, always with a hand on Seth.

After an interesting conversation with Tony Khan, they start to make their way to catering. The two of them walk by Alei – Malakai and his gang, only for Malakai to whip his head around to stare at where Mox’s hand is casually sunk into the back pocket of Seth’s jeans.

“Hey,” Seth says. “Um. Thanks? I guess?” He nods at Mox. “Not sure what you were going for, but I’m happy, at least.” He winks and turns, trying not to feel anxious about leaving the House of Black at his back.

“Did you just thank the House of Black for turning me into a dog-man?”

“No,” Seth says. “I thanked them for turning you into a fuck machine.”

~

“Was that supposed to be a punishment?” Julia asks, levitating some sort of orb above her head. “Malakai, I thought we were mad at them. I think all that did was make Mox more Mox. ”

“It was supposed to make him succumb to his base instincts, to become so distracted by what he wants it would take his mind off of wresting,” Malakai replies, mildly perturbed. “I had no idea Seth would be coming here.”

Brody’s never seen Malakai look befuddled before. It’s disconcerting, but mostly funny.

With a sigh, Malakai turns. “Take the spell off of him, Julia. This didn’t work.”

“It worked something,” Brody mutters. He couldn’t quite help it.

Malakai glares. “I would be quiet, if I were you. You just earned your magic. I’d hate to have to take it from you.”

Brody resists the urge to say that he and Julia have been practicing their magic for months now. “Right. Sure.”

“I’ll have to think of something else,” Malakai mutters, standing. “I’ll return shortly. Don’t,” he turns to stare at both Brody and Julia, “get into trouble.”

“We won’t,” Julia says, and Brody thinks only he can see her smile.

When the door closes, he moves to sit next to her on the couch. She throws her legs over his lap. “What do you want to do next?”

Julia grins and opens her mouth, only to jump at the sound of shouts in the next locker room. “Oh, for the – that’s Daniel and Yuta again, isn’t it?”

“Sounds like it.”

Julia’s smile turns devious, and turns the ball of energy in her hands green. With a whisper into her cupped fingers, swirling the ball to a near neon, she pushes it through the wall over to Garcia and Yuta. “There,” she says, snuggling into Brody’s side. “That should provide us entertainment enough.”

“What exactly did you do?”

Julia laughs. “You’ll see.”

~

Mini Playlist: Hungry Like the Wolf - Duran Duran Like an Animal - The Donnas Closer - Nine Inch Nails Moonlight Magic - Ashnikko