#also i just like them lol i like mashton a lot and enjoy writing them

[allsassnoclass]

2022 Writing Evaluation

I was tagged by the wonderful Bella @clumsyclifford (thank you for digging this up and tagging me first because i 100% was going to do it anyway lol)

also my pseudonyms are combined on ao3 so although this is my 5sos blog you will be hearing about my other fandom writing as well

1. number of stories posted on ao3: 17!

2. word count posted for this year: 124,269 on ao3, 23,433 for ask box prompts, so a grand total of 147,702!

3. fandoms i wrote for: 5sos, 1d, It (2017 and 2019 movies), Stranger Things, HSMTMTS, Cobra Kai

4. pairings: on ao3 we have some nice crisp muke, lashton, mashton, mashton (friendship version), cashton, cake, malum, narry, lilo (and then also kiaz and caswen (friendship(?) version) and reddie and hellcheer).  adding in the ask box prompts and we also have 5sos ot4, roylum, and lashton (friendship version)

5. story with the most kudos/bookmarks/comments: for all of those it’s technically my hellcheer fic, but for the 5sos ones hits and kudos are The Catch, comment threads is pas de deux! 

6. work i’m most proud of (and why): pas de deux hands down no question.  it’s my longest fic by over 20k!  i wrote it almost constantly from november to december and had a goal to post each chapter on christmas and the four sundays leading up to it and i actually accomplished that goal!!!! i’ve never successfully focused on one particular fic for that long, and it actually worked!!! plus, for such a long fic, i think i did a relatively good job of keeping characterizations consistent and sensical throughout, as well as finding little themes to carry through the entire fic (which i got lucky with tbh, some things that became running pieces of the fic were not planned out before, i just caught them as they were happening).  i haven’t read the fic back since completing it so it’s possible it’s not as cohesive or as good as i think it is, but i’m extremely proud of myself for it nonetheless.

7. work i’m least proud of (and why): right now, it’s probably when i watch the world burn.  i struggled with that one and in the end i don’t think it quite got to where i wanted it to, but i was on a time crunch.  it’s a lot different from what i usually write, but i don’t know if i made that transition to a different story style and topic as smoothly as i would have liked.

8. share or describe a favorite review you received: someone left a very long and gratifying comment on both Puzzle Pieces and its sequel Bedroom Activities back in February.  grey114 if you see this i love you.  it was really gratifying to get a comment on a piece that i love so much that was over a year old at that point, especially since they said it was a reread and they just touched on a lot of things in a really sweet way and that made me feel very happy to have written those fics.

also i know this doesn’t technically count because it got it today but amanda read when i watch the world burn (again, not my proudest work) and said that although this “isn’t her kind of fic” she said that that particular fic is the “biggest proof that it’s the writer more than the content or pairing” because she enjoyed it, which was really nice to hear especially when i’m not feeling the best about it.  it’s also just an insane compliment because i absolutely love amanda’s writing, and every time a writer i love also confirms that they really like my stuff it makes me feel good lol

9. a time when writing was really, really hard: the entire first 3/4 of the year, tbh!  i was in a big writing slump earlier in the year and it seemed to keep going forever, then I was super busy in the summer and simply didn’t have time.  i don’t think i hit my writing stride again until i let myself impulse-write for other fandoms.  i think that’s what i really started to realize exactly what it means to write what you love uninhibited, rather than writing what you think you should.  like. i have 10k of an angsty caswen at college fic in my drive that may never see the light of day because it’d be super long, but letting myself go to town on that with no expectations of necessarily posting it or even completing it was really healthy for me and extremely enjoyable, and it loosened all the writing mechanisms in my brain to get me back in a writing groove.

10. a scene or character you wrote that surprised you: hmmmmm let’s see.  honestly i was most surprised to write anything for hsmtmts or cobra kai, let alone something from johnny’s pov, but for 5sos stuff i was surprised to write so much feldy.  he became a pretty big player in pas de deux and when initially planning that fic i don’t think i realized how much screen time he would have.  ashton’s characterization in when i watch the world burn was also surprising.  i didn’t know when i started writing that he would be like that.

11. a favorite excerpt of your writing:  here’s a little bit of the ending of undeniable you

When Ashton fully wakes up, he can hear spring rain pattering against the roof.  The room is still blanketed in gray, but Michael is still glowing, even if Ashton only has a view of his bedhead from the way they’re cuddled together.  He shifts right before Ashton musters up the willpower to leave the comforting warmth of their bedroom and begin breakfast, as if he can sense that Ashton would rather spend the morning talking with him in appropriately hushed tones than leaving the cozy atmosphere that surrounds them.  His eyes are fuzzy and sleepy when he blinks up at him, but he smiles like he’s never been more sure of his place here.

12. how did you grow as a writer this year? i finally truly understood what it means to write for myself!!!! to write for the enjoyment of writing!!!! to stop holding myself to arbitrary standards of what fics i should be working on and how often!!!!!! this year i really let myself work on what i want when i want, and it really did wonders for me.  also, i discovered that for the most part outlining does genuinely help me

13. how do you hope to grow next year? mostly i want to continue to write what i want to write.  i want to maintain this peace and enjoyment of writing that i’ve found and continue to treat myself with kindness when it comes to this hobby and not let it become unpleasant.  that being said, i do also want to focus on individual projects more.  i think the key to ensuring these two things aren’t mutually exclusive is to find projects that i genuinely love and to add little bits in there for me to enjoy, like all of the minnesota references (and the csi miami reference) in pas de deux.

EDIT: I also want to start replying to comments this year! i might not reply to new comments on old fics just because i’d feel weird not replying to the comments before (and i have fics form 2016, so i feel like it’d be weird if i went back and replied to those) but i’ll at least reply to comments put on pas de deux onwards.

14. who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc)? okay i’m going to list four (4!!!) different people.  bella @clumsyclifford and annie @carouselstars have both been extremely supportive, especially while i’ve been complaining in the club nearly every day for the past two months.  they’re always encouraging me.  i also need to give a big shout out to megs @igarbagecannoteven and gregory @doomeddiabetic for being great sounding boards! pas de deux would not have been completed without megs helping me sort things out in the very beginning, and gregory is willing to talk shop about fandoms they’re not even part of.

15. anything from your real life show up in your writing this year? little things here and there!  it’s most prevalent in pas de deux, where i highkey projected onto both characters and forced them to exist in minneapolis.  i have been to mia and love all of the art pieces i mentioned in chapter 3. my favorite ballet is dances at a gathering.  i, like calum, must always remind people of famous minnesotans.  shayla is my favorite newscaster.  i watch csi miami and ncis when i need something mindless on in the background.  i namedropped my old tech director and ballet teacher in that one.  pas de deux is full of little hazel pieces lol

16. any new wisdom you can share with other writers? find what pleases you!  find what you enjoy, and don’t turn writing into a chore that you have to do, but rather a special treat to enjoy!  this doesn’t mean that it’s going to be sunshine and rainbows all the time, of course.  maybe you’re the type of writer who gets immense satisfaction from finishing a difficult piece, and that far outweighs the frustration and struggles to write it!  everyone is going to be different with figuring out what constitutes enjoyment, but that’s what helped me, at least.

17. any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year? i’m trying not to put too much pressure on myself but i really hope to finish three particular 5sos fics.  i think they could become my new favorites.  i also have a cobra kai fic that i’d love to write!  also, i really want to post at least one chapter of unmute, given that i didn’t do that this year

18. tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read:  @igarbagecannoteven, @carouselstars, @lifewasradical, @jbhmalumm, @lukemichaelcalumashton, @babush-cat if you’d like!

[igarbagecannoteven]

good luck on writing your novel opening! i am sending you lots of positive writing and plot vibes!!! but also i would like to know the answers to 5, 11, 12, 24, 35, 43, 54, 72, and 77! That's a lot of questions so feel free to pick and choose but i am genuinely curious about all of them -hazel

thank you for the positive vibes and good luck wishes!! they have been received and i edited and reworked the first 4.5k of the assignment! (most of it had already been edited previously, so don't be too impressed lol)

5. how many wips do you have? how many fandoms/pairings are they for? depending on what you count as a "wip", i'd say somewhere btwn 30-40ish? all 5sos pairings have more than one wip, and i've got a couple hp wips (and one doctor who drabble, but that's finished so it doesn't count)

11. do you write scenes in order or do you jump around? i usually start from what i think is the beginning at the time and then start jumping around when i either run into a wall or am inspired by something that will happen later!

12. do you outline your fics? if yes, how detailed are your outlines? how far do you stray from them? it depends! most fics i start have a general idea of how they'll go, but they rarely get an outline (unless you count one sentence in a notes app as an outline, but i don't) as for proper outlines, i have three aus (my big superhero au, we gotta make a decision's parent au, and my crazy scifi au) that have "proper" outlines, which range from extremely vague to very specific. i have yet to stray too far from any of them, but i'm also not super far along so we'll see! (my 4th of july au and my baby blue au also have docs that are vaguely outline shaped, but i'm not counting them for multiple reasons, chief among them being that they may never be written)

24. how do you choose which pov to write from? answered here!

35. what's your favorite fic you've posted? ohhh gosh. i really do love what if i'm weak (and i need you tonight?) i think it's one of my strongest writing-wise, i love the characters, it's my 2nd most popular fic,,, yeah idk i just think it's nice :))

43. is there a trope or idea you'd really like to write but haven't yet? lots! there are so many that are in wip-land, but one that hasn't even gotten a doc yet is a longer fic that's both a quarantine au and a slowburn and a fic that centers around the character's ace-ness. i've been thinking about it for a while now and i think it's something i need to sit on for a few months/years before i start it, but hopefully someday it'll be written :))

54. what's the fandom/pairing distribution of your posted fics? it's very sad :(( i've got 3 malum, 2 lashton, 1 mashton, 1 cake, 1 malum friendship fic, and no muke or cashton :(((( i can't wait to release more stuff with other pairings i don't like how unbalanced it is :((

72. what's your favorite writing compliment you've gotten? today in my creative writing class i got a very nice compliment from a classmate that made me very soft(tm). he said something like "we've talked about how great your ideas and concepts are in your story and that's true, but the real strength is the characters, who are so real and strong that they help me believe everything about this world you're building". and i just. :') i mean any compliment on my writing makes me melt but i think characters are the most important part of a story and for him to say that??? i did not propose but it was a close thing ksdjflkdsjfljsd

77. why do you enjoy writing fanfic? i like the freedom it gives me! i like that i can write characters and not have to worry about telling people what they look like or their general vibe bc they already know! (i hate describing how characters look lol it's the bane of my existence) i like the community feeling! i love how people can just comment on what they liked best and know that i'll read it! i like that so many different kinds of writing can fit under this one umbrella! i just love it!!

writer’s ask time!

[bandsanitizer]

8 songs, 8 rules (or something)

RULES: 8 song prompts & tag 8 people

thank you for the tag @staticsounds @redrattlers @tirednotflirting and @reachthezeneth !!

1. Favorite song at the moment.

Starting Line by Luke Hemmings she says to the surprise of no one. also That Funny Feeling by Bo Burnham and Goodbye by Bo Burnham

2. A song you associate with your favorite ship.

This requires me picking a favorite ship which like I don’t know how to do that. So we’ll go with my narrowed down top 3 ships.

so first CALM bc ot4 is superior. I have decided. their whole existence and meeting is fanfic material (childhood besties malum. we both thought the other was too cool cake. enemies to besties muke. met online mashton. we’ve met before! lashton. was angry bc where tf were you but then I fell in love with you cashton.) anyways song from my ot4 playlist Never Be by 5sos and my biggest writing goal is to write a fic based on it bc I could go on forever about colors in 5sos music.

next ship is birdflash and the song I associate would be Heroes by MIKA and like specifically YJ!verse but could work otherwise. and the other ship is Blam (from glee) and I associate them with Sick of Losing Soulmates by dodie.

the real moral of the story here is that I love the friends to lovers trope and most of my favorite ships exist in this realm of I’m okay with them being strictly platonic or being romantic and what matters to me is how they see ALL of the other and still choose to love them (platonic or romantic). and that said… there’s a lot of overlap on songs lol

3. A song that could be about you.

26 by Paramore bc even though that’s about her… the first time I heard the song I started crying and it’s just… learning to navigate being your biggest critic and most important supporter is a Struggle. trying to stay grounded and not give up on dreams. I just RELATE to this song with my whole being

4. A song that you think is underrated.

At the End of the Day by Mali-Koa. Listen like this whole album is phenomenal but I really think we don’t talk about this song enough. It’s really about this idea that everything you want to be and need to be is already inside you. that whatever you’re searching for you’ll find it because you already have it. idk it’s a comforting song for me and I think one of the best lyrics on the album (okay honestly the whole album is just lyrically a masterpiece)

5. A song that reminds you of a good memory.

Sevens by Samuel Hazo. My high school band never followed through on performing this in a concert, but learning this piece and everything was such a positive experience during band. Also 11/16 & 7/16 was just really fun to play! Learning the xylo part was an adventure but truly something I enjoyed and it’s just very tied to the best feelings of being in band. Notably a memory of one run through that was just spot on! (Also that feeling of finally getting the piece right? YEAH)

6. The last song you listened to.

Sticky (with SHAED) - Piano Version by The Maine (or well technically Upside Down by Austin Moon bc I watched Austin & Ally) like Sticky is a great song and then make it all pretty with a piano and then make it a duet???

7. A song that makes you laugh.

P*rnstar by ModSun. Censored bc I feel weird about that word being on my blog. Like it’s not even a bad song either? It’s very secksual though. And was like unexpected despite being completely expected based on the title. IDK it’s just like… made me laugh while listening to Internet Killed the Rockstar.

For a more sfw song: The Turd Song by Big Time Rush. Iconic. Amazing. Genius. Invented music. James’ run at the end?!?!

8. A song you want your mutuals to listen to.

I don’t think a day will go by where I don’t find a way to rec flights by twentylove. Like it’s just… a great song. lyrics and all it’s a favorite of mine. but for a different song Watercolors by Will Jay like it frustrates me this is the only version he’s released bc this song is sooooooooo good.

tagging (if you want to!): @takemealive @calumsash @hoodhoran @thenervousduck @in-superbloom @karajaynetoday @opheliascribbles @ladybugnoah

[allsassnoclass]

rainy days in california

Pairing: Michael Clifford/Ashton Irwin Rating: General Audiences Word Count: 2023 Read on AO3

Southy is hiding under the bed.

It takes a while for Ashton to find him, because he hasn't experienced a thunderstorm while living with Michael yet.  The relationship between them isn't new or fragile by any means, but California has long periods of drought and they didn't decide to consolidate living spaces until the beginning of the summer.  It's been dry, and large booms of thunder haven't shaken the house until now.

Ashton reaches out to Southy, fingers gently brushing his fur.  Moose is with him under the bed, laying quietly but not whining like Southy is.  Ashton can't coax him out while the rain is still pounding on the roof, but he can offer some gentle ear rubs and soothing words, for what they're worth.

Michael finds him laying on the floor of their bedroom a few minutes later.

"Hey, Ash," he says, nudging his side with his foot.  "Scared of the storm?"

"Southy is," he says, arm still outstretched under the mattress still.

"He'll be fine," Michael replies, getting down next to him to greet the dogs.  "That's what we have Moose for.  Isn't it, girl?  Who's a good puppy?"

Moose licks his fingers, army-crawling forward to get better access.

"Southy used to cry a lot worse than this during storms.  She helps temper him a little."

Ashton hums.

"Come on," Michael says, sitting up and nudging him again.  "Unless you want to stay up here with the dogs all day, but I feel like you're going to start complaining about the hardwood soon."

"And just leave them?" Ashton asks.  Michael shrugs.

"They'll be fine.  Southy is just being dramatic."

"I wonder where he gets that from," Ashton says with a pointed look.  Michael sticks his tongue out at him, then heaves himself to standing, offering Ashton a hand.  He takes it, hauling himself to his feet and letting Michael lead him out to the main room.  The rain falls in thick sheets outside their windows, cloud cover painting the landscape a deep navy blue.  Michael leaves him by the windows and wanders to the kitchen.  Soon, Ashton hears the tell-tale sounds of the kettle being put on, clanking loud enough to carry over the rain because Michael has never learned to be gentle with the dishes.  Ashton watches the rain and lets the ambient sounds of their home wash over him until Michael presses a warm mug into his hands.

"It's scheduled to keep going all day," Michael says.  "The thunderstorm warning is only until two, though."

Ashton takes a sip of his tea, under-steeped and just a little too hot.  The temperature difference between the liquid and the air conditioning they have blasting makes him shiver.  Michael's hand sliding around his waist and his head on Ashton's shoulder makes him shiver for a different reason.

They pop in a movie, something lighthearted released years ago.  Southy and Moose wander out about halfway through, once the thunder has died down and lightning stops illuminating the sky.  Moose takes her place next to Michael, but Southy tries to worm in between him and Ashton.  Ashton pulls him onto his lap instead, running a steady hand over his fur until he settles.

He catches the end of Michael's fond smile out of the corner of his eye.

Once the credits have rolled through and the main menu is playing on a loop, Michael gets up to put their mugs in the sink.  When he returns he braces himself on the back of the couch and leans down to kiss Ashton before flopping next to him.

"You seem quiet today," Michael says.  "What's up?"

Ashton shrugs.

"I think it's the rain.  It always makes me a little sluggish.  I never want to do anything when it rains like this."

"I love the rain," Michael says, adjusting his position so he can stick his cold toes under Ashton's thigh.  "It's fun. Refreshing.  I like how everything smells afterwards."

"You always were a little weird," Ashton says.  Michael removes one foot so he can kick at him, then returns his toes to under Ashton's leg.

"Lots of people like that smell.  Besides, nothing is as fun as going out and playing in the rain.  It's like going to the water park but better because you can push your friends down into the mud."

"You're so weird."

"Am not!"

"Are too," Ashton says, giving him a lopsided grin.  Michael gets cute when he's teased, cheeks always turning the slightest bit pink and eyes lighting up.  Ashton likes gently ribbing him over unimportant things like this just to watch the way energy thrums through him.

"Fine.  Come on," Michael says, getting up once again and dislodging Moose.  He grabs Ashton's hand, pulling at him until he pushes Southy off his lap and stands.

"Where are we going?" he asks.

"Outside," Michael says.

"Really?  Now?"

"Yep," Michael says, popping the last syllable.  "It's not thundering or downpouring too heavily anymore, so it's the perfect type of rain for us."

Ashton could dig his heels in and stop, but part of him wants to see what Michael is so excited about, and the other part of him is willing to do whatever it takes to make Michael happy.

Michael doesn't pause to let them put on shoes, just opens the door and marches out, Ashton's hand still securely in his.  The humidity hits him before the rain does, a heavy presence in the air that has been lessened by the storm but hasn't fully broken yet.  In contrast, the touch of droplets against his skin is refreshing.  It's a summer storm, so the rain is a warm, gentle kiss, dampening his hair and sliding over his face.

Michael tips his head up, pausing with his eyes closed and a smile on his lips.  Ashton watches the rain cascade over him.  After a few moments Michael cracks his eyes open, giggling in delight like a child seeing snow for the first time.  His laugh is infectious, bringing a smile to Ashton's face immediately.

"Come on," Michael says, pulling him forward again.  "Let's find some puddles!  Let's stand in the mud!  Let's stick our tongues out and count how many raindrops we can catch!"

They do exactly that.

The puddle comes first.  There's a dip in their sidewalk that always pools water when the rare rain comes to California and Michael jumps in it with no regard for his bare feet hitting the pavement, splashing Ashton's ankles.  Michael kicks more water at him and it's easy to succumb to the giddy feeling rising in his lungs, laughing as he joins him in the puddle, both of them sloppy with their footwork and nearly bonking heads due to how close they're standing while watching the ground.  

It's fun almost because of how not-fun it should be.  It's just water and them standing too close to each other, but Michael is laughing like a little kid and Ashton is thinking about how much joy there is in finding someone to be ridiculous and kind of stupid with.

Michael pulls them onto the grass, spinning them in a circle.  The dirt is soft under their feet, the blades of grass slippery enough that Ashton has to fight to keep his balance when Michael begins to lead them around in a jaunty dance, singing a nonsense melody with no words attached.

"What are you doing?" Ashton laughs.

"Singing in the rain," Michael sings back, twirling Ashton under his arm and continuing to sashay them both across the yard.  Ashton stumbles along after him, throwing an arm around Michael's shoulders to keep himself upright.  They keep that going for a few minutes until they trip over each other's feet, tumbling down to the grass intertwined with matching yelps.

"This is the 'pushing your friends down into the mud' part, I take it?" he asks, turning his head so he doesn't drown from the rainwater in his mouth.  Michael snorts and begins to detangle their limbs, so Ashton takes the opportunity to shove him back and wrestle a bit.  The rain means neither of them can get an easy grip, tumbling around on the grass with various yelps and expletives until Michael finally gets to his feet, Ashton catching his breath on his back.

"Ha!" Michael yells, pointing at him.  "Take that, Irwin!"

He still helps Ashton up when he asks for it, pressing a quick kiss to his lips.

They don't stay out too long after that.  Ashton has grass and dirt all over him, and Michael shivers at one point despite the warm temperature.  They stand with arms out and heads tipped up to catch raindrops on their tongues, then call it a day and head back inside.

Ashton stops Michael in the entranceway with a hand on his wrist.

"We can't go through the house like this," he says.  "Strip and get a shower ready.  I'll throw our stuff in the laundry so nothing stains."

Michael waggles his eyebrows but does as he says, shedding his soaked shirt and shorts and leaving wet and dirty footprints in a trail to the bathroom.  Ashton picks up everything and gets the washing machine started, throwing his own clothing into the mix and shivering in their air conditioning.  Ashton likes keeping it at a lower temperature than Michael does, but right now he can't wait to warm up.

The bathroom is full of steam when he enters, Michael already under the spray of the shower.  Ashton slips in behind him, closing the shower door and accidentally startling Michael in the process.

"I didn't hear you come in," he says, grabbing Ashton's arms and switching their places so Ashton can rinse off, bits of grass and dirt swirling down the drain.

"You're lucky I wasn't a murderer," Ashton says, letting Michael's fingers scrub through his hair to ensure each strand gets rinsed.  "You'd be terrible in a horror movie."

"That's what I have you for," Michael says, grabbing the shampoo.  He squirts a dollop out onto his palm and rubs his hands together to get it to lather, then sets about washing Ashton's hair for him.  Ashton tips his head down and closes his eyes, exhaling.  Michael's fingers rub soothing circles against his scalp, backing him fully under the spray again when it's time to rinse.

He returns the favor, watching the way Michael's eyelashes flutter as he works.  He loves the way that Michael lets his guard down around him, the trusting way that he will let Ashton take care of him, eyes closed and head bowed.  He brushes his thumb over the shell of his ear, smiling when Michael blinks his eyes open at him.

Kissing in the shower is different from kissing in the rain.  They’re more relaxed here, the giddy energy having been transformed to a calm contentment, and Ashton can take his time cupping Michael’s jaw and exploring his mouth.  Michael hums against him, hands seeking Ashton’s waist and disrupting the paths of various water droplets trying to make their way across his skin.

“I love you,” Ashton says when they pull away.

“I love you, too,” Michael says, then grabs the body wash and Ashton’s loofa.

They stay in the shower long enough to enjoy it, but not long enough for the water to run cold.  They change into sweats and comfortable tees after toweling each other dry, piling back onto the couch with the dogs.  The rain has lessened even more now, just a drizzle at the end of the day’s storm, and Michael curls into him in the quiet of their home.

“Did you enjoy it?” Michael asks.  Ashton hums a question.  “The rain.  Does it still make you sluggish?”

Ashton tips his head towards him.

“It’s good,” he says.  “I had fun.  I see why you like it.”

Michael smiles at him and presses closer, leaning up to kiss Ashton’s cheek before resettling.  Ashton listens to the faint patter of rain against their windows and decides that it’s now one of his favorite sounds, second only to Michael’s delighted laugh that only he and the rain can bring out.

[allsassnoclass]

i miss when i used to automatically assess and consider what fics fit which pairing best. now any idea i have my mind screams MASHTON and sometimes i have to take a step back and see what’s actually going on

[allsassnoclass]

hello :)

what's you favourite ff you've written?

what's your favourite pairing to write?

is there a pairing you don't really like (in the sense that you don't like writing it)

will you someday finish unmute?

how's your day been?

thank you for making 5sos fic exchanges! some of my favourite fanfics came from you setting this whole thing up! i'm always excited when new round comes.

also the catch is soooo cutee. while they're not my fave pairing, when the fic is good the fic is good :D

hello!

My favorite would have to be Puzzle Pieces. It will probably always be Puzzle Pieces tbh. This fic is everything I want in a story, and I feel warm and fuzzy when I reread it! Even though there are maybe a few sentences here or there that I would change as my writing has gotten better, the story is by far my favorite one that I've ever told and I'll always be happy about how many other ace people connected with it :)

My favorite pairing to write is mashton! I love both Michael and Ashton individually, and I think that they're dynamic is so fun because so much of it is understated but there's a very deep and profound connection underneath that. I also really enjoy writing malum, because the childhood bff dynamic makes me warm and fuzzy and they come relatively easily to me!

I struggle a lot with cake and generally do not have inspiration for them. I don't know why, but that's the pairing that I'm least interested in by far, from both a writing and reading perspective. I was genuinely surprised that I got more than one request for a cake prompt the last time I accepted prompts, because I have more roylum fics on ao3 than I do cake fics lol

i will finish unmute someday! it is open on my computer right now. genuinely when i say that i'm almost constantly thinking about it and gradually working on it, i am almost constantly thinking about it and gradually working on it. unfortunately, my inspiration for fics doesn't stick around for very long, and i am not a very fast writer. there are a few other complications for this particular fic (there's a huge amount of research, ensuring that there's consistency and a narrative through-line is difficult with something this long, somehow every chapter seems to have more words than the last, this entire year has been rough for writing for me, I have a lot of other projects to focus on, and luke's character is really difficult to write in this particular story right now because he's going through a lot of things and has a lot of feelings that i have absolutely no experience in), but unmute will never be abandoned. i will finish it. it is going to take significantly longer than anyone anticipated, including me. you will get the next chapter by the end of the year

my day has been pretty good! i'm just chilling, so i had breakfast and lazed around and now the first episode of firefly is on tv, which is cool because i like that show a lot! and my dad just made me a blt!

yay i'm glad you enjoy the @5sos-fic-exchange!!! i always love seeing the readers of the fandom get excited for posting day! unfortunately there will not be a winter round this year (we are no longer biannual :'( ) but there will be a songfic fest over at @5sos-fic-fest and the exchange might return next summer!

I've been very surprised over how popular The Catch is! I didn't anticipate this response at all, but I'm glad that you enjoyed it!

Thanks for stopping by!

sleepover!!!

[igarbagecannoteven]

hello hello i saw the writing ask game but did not know which one to send so i'm gonna go with the freebie question AND bonus will you tell me more about your superhero malum au?? i like it a lot and i wanted to hear whatever you have to say about it! where the idea came from, why malum, why calum as the superhero, which installment was your favourite to write (you don't Have to answer all these i'm just curiosu and giving you directions in which to answer in case you need them kbdfd!!!) - taylor <3

hi taylor!! thank you for showing superhero malum au love 🥺 you don't know the monster you just released by asking for what i have to say about it bc i have so many Thoughts klsjfkjsdjd so thank you for giving me the excuse to talk about it <3

25. freebie! what question do you wish i had asked? answer it here! well since you asked my dream questions about superhero au i'm just going to tie one of my answers to your other questions to 12. where do you commonly find inspiration to your stories? about 80% of my fic ideas come from hearing a song lyric and saying to myself, 'that would make a great fic title! now what kind of fic would i have to write in order for the title to fit?' which is maybe not the most orthodox way of coming up with ideas but it works for me lol. the idea for my superhero au came from the song "the last of the real ones" by fob. ever since i heard that song i've wanted to write a superhero au for it, but i never had the medium for it until i started writing 5sos fic. (the title idea was "i know this whole damn city thinks it needs you (but not as much as i do)") (yeah it's long i know) i love superhero stories as a concept but often don't enjoy the way they're executed (i find action/fight scenes boring and would rather focus on the psychological impacts that would come with having that kind of life). i came up with a (very) rough outline for a songfic but quickly realized just how long and difficult a project it would be, so i set it aside. (i have a rule that i don't work on more than one longfic at a time.) but the au kept niggling at me and then one day while listening to 'hate it when you see me cry' i thought about how that could fit into my superhero au, and the rest, as they say, is history!

okay i'm going to put the rest of my answers under the cut bc it got long and i do not have enough self control to cut any of it.

why malum? well when the whole au came into my head, it was at first about how hard it would be to be in love with a superhero who you know is putting their life on the line for people who maybe don't appreciate them, while also having to muddle through whether or not they feel the same way as you do. i think it would be hard to tell if someone who gives everything they have to everyone is really in love with you because how do you know they wouldn't do this for other people? anyways when that idea came into my mind i automatically went to malum. to me, as a pairing they fit the old friends to lovers trope the best and also tend to work well with mutual pining, so it seemed like the most logical fit. when i was planning to turn it into one giant songfic i thought that not all the lyrics reflected their relationship so i thought it would be cool to maybe have two parallel love stories side by side, one friends to lovers and one enemies to lovers. that threw me for a loop for a bit because i don't think of lashton when i think enemies to lovers, and so there was a moment when i seriously considered changing the pairings to be friends to lovers cake and enemies to lovers mashton (i know everyone tends to jump to muke for enemies to lovers but i was already attatched to ashton as the superhero who started first and also thought it'd be a more original concept to have enemies to lovers mashton since the difference in dynamic could be cool to explore) but in the end i just couldn't get cake to fit the dynamic i wanted for the friends to lovers plot (not that i think they don't work well as friends to lovers, i just didn't think their dynamic would fit the concept i was going for very well) so in the end i went back and looked at the enemies to lovers plot and realized how i could pretty easily make it work as a lashton story. (and who knows maybe someday i'll write a different superhero au with enemies to lovers mashton, it just won't be in the same world as this au.)

why calum as the superhero? to be completely honest i don't really remember why i came up with that idea. i just pulled up my outline (i don't like to delete ideas so it just has the things i threw out striked through instead of deleted) and when it was cake friends to lovers luke was the superhero so who tf knows. honestly it was probably just a gut reaction to what i thought fit their dynamic better, and also i tend to find michael's perspective easier to write and i think in the longfic i was planning on having the story mostly be told from ashton and michael's perspective, so it was just easier. or maybe not! my memory is like a sieve so who knows what past megs was really thinking.

which installment was your favorite to write? probably the first one, tbh. it was more rooted in personal experience than the second (not that i'm bffs with a superhero or have ever had to talk someone through seeing someone die in their arms for the first time lol) which made it easier to write and i kinda feel like it's a better written fic? like there are tons of lines in the first one i'm really proud of and while there are several in the second i enjoyed writing, (dissected frog simile my beloved) it's not as much. i mean, writing in general isn't a very enjoyable process for me so it's kinda hard to say definitively (i'm just coming out of wanting to pull my own teeth out during the second one but i def felt that way about the first one as well) but yeah. probably the first one.

i have so many thoughts about the world itself but this is getting insanely long so i'll stop here before you regret sending this ask lol. thank you so much for asking about my boys!!! i love you and hope you're doing well <3

[allsassnoclass]

I would like a director's cut for Puzzle Pieces OR the lashton christmas present one you wrote for my prompt about what other gifts you had they do

well for the Christmas one (that was teacher!lashton, yeah?) I can tell you that I did not have a good time picking out the presents lol. I low-key hate choosing gifts for fics (I have a prompt from November that includes gift-giving that I still haven’t done yet for this reason).  I don’t consider myself a very good gift-giver, so figuring out what characters would give each other stresses me out.  In the end I couldn’t come up with a singular gift that would be expensive or meaningful for this Luke for a secret Santa, so instead I gave Ashton too much inspiration and let him choose multiple gifts.  I found half of them by googling good/meaningful gifts and picking what I thought Ashton could/would feasibly get.

I’ve already talked about Puzzle Pieces a while ago here but I will say more things under the cut (spoiler warning, obviously lol). some day I will combine these two asks into one director’s cut master post

so puzzle pieces. my baby. my pride and joy.  this idea started forming back in May (I know because I was looking through my asks to Helen on her blog recently and I mentioned it).  It took a while to get to though, because I needed to let it simmer in the back and wanted to work on too close to see first.  I love soulmate aus that include platonic soulmates without specifying what soulmate is which type, and I really like the idea of soulmate aus where first physical contact produces a color, so you don’t necessarily know if you’re soulmates right away.  two things somewhat bother me about soulmate aus and one of them is that once two people discover that they’re soulmates it’s easy smooth sailing with no buffer period.  like whenever two soulmates meet for the first time and then kiss after five minutes it’s very ???? to me because you don’t know that person!!! you don’t know them!!!!! part of what I wanted to show in this one was the development of a relationship between everyone, and one way to do that was to make First Touches a big deal so the boys didn’t necessarily know they were soulmates right away with the exception of malum, but they were babies and little kids sometimes become bffs within 2 minutes anyway so I figured that was okay.  how our society would change if soulmates existed in a distinguishable way is something I've thought of a lot, and that manifested as it being a Big Deal to touch someone for the first time in this fic.

originally, way back in the day, I was going to have a different color for each pairing, but that was going to get really messy really fast, so instead I gave each person their own color that they leave on everyone else.  I talk about why I chose each color in the other ask.

two of my favorite scenes to write were the scene right after the recording studio where Ashton tells Michael about his dad and the scene where Ashton touches everyone else for the first time.  I just really like Ashton/mashton lol but I also felt like the scene in the car fixed another thing about soulmates that bothers me: love takes work!!! I really wonder how many soulmate relationships would be happy ones if we had marks to designate soulmates in the real world. I wanted to ensure that our soulmate relationships in this fic were not friends/partners because they’re soulmates, but because they genuinely enjoy each other and put work into the relationship.  revealing that soulmarks could theoretically disappear like Ashton’s dad’s did was one way to put that in context of the greater universe.  earlier in the fic I mention also that soulmarks show how easy it should theoretically be to love someone, not that you love them.  they are not a guarantee.  giving Ashton abandonment issues made his acceptance of the boys as his soulmates that much sweeter in my opinion, because accepting their marks was his way of saying that he trusts them to put in the work to love him.

I know I've mentioned this before but Michael wasn’t ace until about 4 days before I posted.  I’m pretty sure there was a conversation about ace rep in fics that I witnessed in the early early days of the club and then I looked at the (almost finished) doc and was like. hang on a sec. I could add two sentences and as its written right now this guy would be ace. so that’s what I did! because it turns out a lot of Michael’s “is this platonic or romantic” dilemma/crisis fits really well with my ace experience.  write what you know, amiright lads?

also an underrated line in this is Calum is an old, comfortable sweater, but Luke is like a favorite pair of shoes.  They both fit him perfectly.  He feels more at home when either of them are around, and although the love he has for Calum is different, he thinks he could love Luke just as much.  He thinks he might, by now. like bruh that’s the point of the whole fic! loving people differently, not less/more!!!!! also I just really like that comparison of the clothing items.  feels good feels authentic.

the first time this was referred to as an ot4 fic it threw me off because it’s not romantic between the four of them but I like that people say it’s an ot4 fic because the mashton and muke friendships are just as important as malum in my eyes, although I love malum in this dearly and think they’re super super cute.

also initially I thought it was going to be around 8k.  whenever I give myself a word count limit I think a fic will be, I exceed it.  that’s fine though I'm okay with that. it’s a lot more important to tell the story in the amount of words it needs than to either rush it or elongate it.

anyway those are the puzzle pieces thoughts for the night, tune back next time for more that I'll inevitably be able to dig up because I will never get tired of talking about this fic

[allsassnoclass]

hi hazel, for the fanfic ask 1, 2, 10 for puzzle pieces and 34? -taylor🖤

hello taylor! thank you for asking!

1. What’s your favorite character(s) to write for? I think it's Michael and Ashton, which probably explains why I write so much mashton lol. Michael I think comes easiest typically and he's very versatile in writing, but I also really enjoy Ashton.

2. What character(s) do you find the most difficult to write for? Why? these days it's any of the non-5sos people (atl, 1d, the girlfriends, etc) (actually I don't really think I've ever tried to write the gfs). I have Luke and Calum down pretty good and I wouldn't say I find either of them difficult to write for, but more and more lately any of the people associated with 5sos are difficult, or I have higher standards for "correct" characterization and such for them. roy is in a special limbo here because I have written him as a main character twice but i'm really just guessing because his thought process/how he sees the world is pretty different from me and we don't get a lot of content with him and calum together so there's not a lot to go off of there.

10. What is the line you’re proudest of from Puzzle Pieces? There are a few, but it's probably this one:

Calum is an old, comfortable sweater, but Luke is like a favorite pair of shoes.  They both fit him perfectly.  He feels more at home when either of them are around, and although the love he has for Calum is different, he thinks he could love Luke just as much.

That's the theme of the fic, baby! I also like the clothing metaphor/simile, because comfortable sweaters and favorite pairs of shoes are very different but equally as good and comfortable and wonderful.

34. Have you felt emotional while writing a scene before? What scene was it? I haven't really? Or if I have, I don't remember. I feel like I don't get very emotional when I write, I'm more technically minded than emotionally minded when I write, or I just haven't written an emotional enough scene yet.

ask me some fanfic writer questions

[allsassnoclass]

okay hello!! 2, 4, 11, 17, 18, 25, 31 xoxo bella

hello bella thank you for asking!  many questions and I can’t shut up so this one is under the cut

2. Why do you write fanfiction? Many reasons!  I’ve always loved writing since I was a little kid and fanfiction is a very low-pressure way to do that.  The characters and world are already there, I just get to play around with them.  Fanfiction is also very character-centric most of the time, and I really enjoy writing about moments between people rather than having to think out elaborate plots for Everything.  There’s also the benefit of getting immediate feedback and validation.  Fanfic is a great way for me personally to do one of my favorite hobbies and still share it with people, since writing something like a novel would require a lot more work, more formal publication, and be generally more pressure

4. Are there any writers that inspire you? mmmmmmmmmmmmm great question.  Honestly I’m not sure I would say there are other fic writers that inspire me, except maybe Helen?  I did start writing for 5sos because of her so yeah ms. @calumcest is an inspiration.  As far as novel authors then I really really love Maggie Stiefvater’s writing and I could say she inspires me stylistically.  Her figurative language is amazing and she writes really human characters that you can fall in love with but that still have flaws so I’m always trying to incorporate more of that into my writing

11. Who or what do you find yourself writing about most?  Michael lol.  He’s easy to write and for a while the vast majority of my fics were from his point of view.  As far as the what, I write a lot about healthy relationships.  A lot of times the relationships I write are almost an ideal.  It might not be realistic but it’s how I hope people love each other.  I also write about friendship I would say.  Just general love!  I write about love!!!

17. A trope you’ll never, ever write for. I’m not going to do a huge age gap or a significant power imbalance, nor have the endgame pairing be abusive.  I also will never do a fic with explicit smut.  Otherwise, I’m not going to count anything out because even nasty/problematic tropes can sometimes be twisted in a really thought-provoking way (even writing this down I kept thinking of stuff then having to backtrack because I either have written it or thought about it) (like I have done a fic with an abusive main pairing but then one of them dies and for me it was a character exploration rather than a pairing exploration)

18. Wildest fic you’ve ever written? the roylum fic lol.  It’s 1200 words of roy thinking and then like 300 words of dialogue. otherwise I feel like I have yet to do anything particularly wild

25. Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them! I have a little bit for the off-screen ‘verse, mainly because I’m still developing the prequel in my head.  That’s also where the epilogue came from!  I think I’ve done that with puzzle pieces before as well but nothing too specific there, and sometimes I think about what college mashton and friends are up to.  Basically, if the series isn’t over, I’m thinking about it.  I don’t really do that with other fics I’ve written though, it’s mostly the in-development ones (like the circus school au)

31. Do you have any OCs? Tell us about them!  Well that would be Daisy and Louisa, my girls from Off-Screen!  Eventually they will figure out they like each other and start dating.  Daisy is a visual art major with a concentration in painting and Louisa is a nursing major.  They’re cute I like them.  I think all of my fic OCs are women actually because there are too many men as the focus in this fandom (that’s why I like to utilize Halsey so much, because I feel weird including the girlfriends most of the time but Halsey is a public figure and a friend).  Kori was a fun OC to introduce in the malum fake dating fic, as was the rest of Michael’s extended family.  I took some inspiration from my own extended family for that (Bill was partially based on one of my aunts, my grandpa used to rent a personal plane and fly himself and a kid or two down to see his mom, my grandparents used to play solitaire together).  In the mashton fake dating Alexis is just Alexis idk what to say about her except that I wanted another coworker and I wanted a woman.  I think that’s mainly it for my fic OCs????  I have some for novels/plays I haven’t written (Spencer!!! Teddy!!! Alvaro!!! Patricia!!! Wesley!!!  Arima!!! Jo!!!!) but otherwise I don’t think any of my current projects really require OCs

[allsassnoclass]

hello hazel! how about 7, 10, 31 and 44 for the ask game! -taylor🖤

hi @squishmichael love to have you here!!!

7. Do you prefer to read short fics or long fics? the sweet spot for me is 4k-15k! I like short and long for different reasons, but it's difficult for me to find the time/attention span for anything over 20k. However, some ideas take a few more words to fully develop relationships or characters or worlds, so i'd say medium-sized fics are the ones i like reading the most! i'm more likely to read a short fic than a long fic, though, simply because a nice little bite-sized fic is easy to fit into the day

10. What’s your favorite fandom, pairing, or character to read fic for? it depends on my mood! and also, to an extent, who's writing it. right now i'm obviously reading a lot of 5sos fic but i also quite like 911 fics and it's a huge fandom so there's lots of good stuff to choose from. i like reading mashton but it kind of depends on the characterization of mashton, so sometimes i prefer malum (who i feel is easier to characterize and also i love them very very much. they scratch a big itch for me). in general though i'm very happy to read a lot of pairings in the 5sos fandom depending on what the premise of the fic is!

31. Of the characters you write for, which is your favorite? Has that choice been swayed at all by your followers/readers’ reactions to certain ones? i think i like writing michael in general best, and i enjoyed writing puzzle pieces michael, specifically! michael comes easiest to me, specifically as the narrator, and i adore him in puzzle pieces that version of him has a permanent place in my heart. this hasn't really been swayed by followers/readers, i'm kind of stuck in my ways lol

44. Rant about something writing related. mmmm let's see what else can I rant about. i feel like i've talked about this before when talking about how i title things but when i find the correct title while i'm writing a fic rather than scrambling for one at the end, it's the best feeling in the world. it takes such a weight off my back and honestly I just really want my titles to be good! i want them to fit the fic i want them to sound nice i want them to make sense which is why forcing myself to come up with one at the end is so difficult and unpleasant, but when the correct title naturally comes to me when i'm writing it's amazing. titles are the first impressions that people get of a fic so i want it to be a good impression!!! i wish i naturally came up with them while writing for every fic lol but for now i'm just grateful that it happens sometimes