#also i dont know if its intentional but i like how the paragraphs are kinda shaped (descending?)

[beddybites]

Do yiu have any tips on like how to attract more attention 😭 it's been a good while and it's a huge struggle of keeping motivation and not so amazing art so it's hard to sure my characters and their stories bc one thing a can say in confidence is I am a good writer I'd like to think, people tell me I have and oddly good but cryptic way of writing that keeps people enthralled, but my biggest struggle is getting them interested in the first place 😭

hi there!! i admittedly dont really know much about the world of writing and how to gain more attention there, but i can try to give tips and see what applies & sticks!

start off short & simple and build it up over time

if you start off with something big and complicated there will be more pressure to keep things big and complicated. theres nothing wrong with short and simple and mixing it up here & there (ie with art: if you only post full pieces with extravagant rendering people will keep expecting it. mix it up a bit. i try posting a variety of sketches and doodles and more detailed things— sometimes some things do better than others and thats ok!

it is 100% okay to repost/reblog your own work

if you ever see me spamming my blog with the same posts, its so i have it back on peoples feeds and on my main profile and its easier for people to find. its also likely that some ppl missed the post, and reblogging/reposting gives them the opportunity to see it!!

something something “its cringe and egotistical” WRONG!!!!!!!!!! its completely normal for creators to repost their content and it may help a lot!!

short & sweet descriptons

when you post, avoid giant paragraphs of text, especially if you’re including art in the post. people will be distracted and will see a giant post and just scroll past it

speaking of descriptions, try using trendy words and notable names

its kinda like hashtagging. if you look at my posts you’ll typically see how i will drop people’s full names + include the word “art” or “doodle” … this is because it will more likely show up on someones feed if said person looks up the same words.

ie: googling “muichiro tokito art” -> insert my post popping up because it has “muichiro tokito art” written out in the description

i admittedly have trouble providing tips as someone who doesnt rlly understand how i got noticed to begin with haha. something something imposter syndrome or whatever they call it these days… so im not really sure if anything above helps, but this is stuff i typically try to keep in mind when i post with the intent of trying to get people to see it

more importantly—

i know this is cheesy and this is easier said than done (i have this habit too a lot of the time) but numbers does not equal ur worth or talent. i know it isnt motivating and it can be so heartbreaking): but even if ur stuff doesnt get a lot of notoriety please know it doesnt define your value . this may sound like gibberish as it is 5 am as im posting this but truly… never give up on ur work!!! i promise u someone out there loves it

im more well known for my deaging & fluff content and to this day im rlly shocked it blew up the way it did. i really made it for myself. i came up with a whole alias and didnt plan on posting it anywhere bc i was so scared ppl would hate it and harass me or nobody would gaf. but eventually i was just like Man. if this thing helps me then maybe it can help someone out there too. and it helped provide ppl some joy & wonder and whimsy & made them feel seen and truly thats all i could ever want…

its difficult and its hard but i promise u… be patient and kind to yourself. it can definitely be hard sharing things around and getting that exposure you need but there are ways for sure. some journeys are faster than others and thats ok!

again sorry if this is all gibberish its super late ): but i hope this could help in some way shape or form

[morningstarofdawnx]

Reasons why I think Crocodile is highkey queer in a trans way

Hello tumblr, your boy is back to cook once again.. I will list off all the reasons I think Crocodile (One Piece) is very queer (trans specifically) and my reasonings for it (Most of these will be based on my own theories btw, some/most of them arent based on canon)

I know its already a very popular headcanon but I wanted to list off WHY its so popular and even kinda implied!

Starting off strong with the main reasoning everyone tells you when you ask them why they hc it, his secret past with Ivankov. One Piece is no stranger to cooking with their villains' backstories/general past stories (the latter being the case for Croc, don't know if we will ever get his actual backstory) and Crocodile... has not been cooked yet. The only thing we know about him is his secret that only Ivankov knows, and based on how Croc acts with this secret it's safe to assume he would not want it out there... but why exactly???? I have a theory on that

Let's say he's trans, just assume it for a sec. Remember how queer people are treated in the OP universe. Although we can give the universe the benefit of the doubt and say the queerphobia isn't that bad to the point where queer people get killed just for being queer, they are very clearly outcasted. In the Impel Down arc we see this a lot, with everyone calling the New Kama soldiers either "a queer" (in the slur way) or a "pervert" (uncalled for tbh). I dont think the main reason Ivankov made the queer paradise was because they were outcasted, but I think that may be one of the reasons for it.

Now, still assuming Croc is trans, lets take a look at why my previous paragraph matters. If we go by the theory that he went to Iva and used their HRT powers to transition, this could be really bad for him if it came out! Like REALLY bad. There is a chance he could lose a large portion of his reputation and his intimidating aura even!! Besides the queerphobia, sexism is very apparent in the OP universe as well. I feel that if word got out that Croc is trans, people would not only be transphobic but also sexist towards him.

I don't think that Croc would get disheartened by all the negative thoughts people have about him, no. That would be very OOC. I think he wouldn't give two shits! But his reputation DOES matter to him, as a man that thrives to be a very strong and remarkable pirate (and also with his dream wanting to be the king of the pirates ofc).

2. Continuing from Impel Down arc, lemme ask you all a question.. did you notice how Crocodile very suddenly got his actual clothes back in the middle of the arc? Well I have an explanation for you. According to a question Oda answered himself, the New Kama prisoners steal clothes and they happened to steal his... for some reason. Why could this be exactly?????

Okay some of you may think I'm reaching (there is a lot of reaching in this essay), but I think that they may have done it as a favor to him knowing that they may meet him someday. JUST THINK ABOUT IT! Iva has history with Croc, they wouldnt ignore Crocs clothing I would think! My main theory is that Iva stole it with the thought of giving it back to Croc themself, maybe with the intention of making Croc join them? Whooo knows...

3. Take a look at this image here.

Now I want you all to think about the villains of OP. I'm not talking about those who are morally grey, like Hancock or Kuma for example. I'm talking about Moria, Doffy, Kaido etc etc. I already mentioned the queerphobia of the universe and how they are outcasted. I think my theory on the villains of one piece not respecting queer ppl as a whole has a chance to be partially correct. Im going to base this entire section on that theory, so feel free to skip if you disagree.

Crocodile as we know, is a horrible dude. Morally Black. No thoughts behind those eyes besides determination, hunger for power and the desperation for victory. I mean look at the dude, he looks damn bored all the time with the only times he shows emotions being when he has fun torturing people! We can safely say that Crocodile is that type of villain.

Now going back to the image, ASSUMING my theory that Crocodile and his past with Iva is based on him being queer, I like to think that he is more "kind" with queer people in general. Him letting a New Kama member do his laces may just be a representation of his power and superiority over the characters, but it could also hint at him specifically asking the New Kama member to do it (which is most likely the case). Why am I mentioning this? Well, as far as I can see, the New Kama member doesn't look scared. Could this be because they trust Croc maybe? Could the New Kama members know about Crocs support through Ivankovs depiction of him (without outing him Id assume)?

Yeah okay... too far of a reach maybe. But HEAR ME OUT ON THIS!!

Going straight from that theory, let me mention the best character in the show...... BONNNNN CLAYYYYYYY!!!!!!

Mr. 2 Themself.. I always thought its really interesting how Bon didnt have a partner while in Baroque Works. For those of you who dont know, the reason for this is because Bon Clay is a very queer individual, and often describes themself as being both genders! Due to this, they specifically went to Crocodile and asked to not have a partner. The partners in Baroque Works are always 1 man and 1 woman, and with Bon being both they didnt want a partner.

CROCODILE LITERALLY HAD NO REASON TO INDULGE IN THIS REQUEST IN ANY WAY??? Why would he, knowing that he will literally LOSE MANPOWER, accept this request at all? There are 2 outcomes to this question. 1, he trusts Bon Clays abilities.. or 2. He respected Bons identity enough to agree to this request. I personally think its the latter because why would he choose less manpower over more?? Even if he trusts Bons abilities, Bon is still vulnerable working alone, and there is no reason for him to not pair them up with anyone besides the identity thing. We constantly see him respect queer characters and even know he has a past with the MAIN QUEER THEMSELF! This is especially weird because he canonically looks down on everyone and thinks everyone is worthless unless theyre useful to him. I don't think any of this is a coincidence........ ONTO THE 3RD REASON!

3. This is Lil CrocTM.

Now, I have asked many people on this and it is confirmed I AM NOT REACHING! THAT KID IS ANDROGYNOUS AF! Yes you could argue he leans more on the masc side, but nevertheless him looking so androgynous as a kid may mean something... WOW! AN ACTUAL CANON REASON AS TO WHY HE MAY BE TRANS! APPLAUSE APPLAUSE

Those are all the main reasons, some honorable mentions;

In this scene, he makes that face the second Iva mentions meeting him as a rookie.. hmm... could this be because he was a WOMAN back then?

Iva specifically says the words "revealing his past" and mentions only one weakness. If that secret was him being trans it would make a lot of sense!

2. Its said that one of the main inspirations of Croc design is Captain Hook, the disney villain. If youre a disney fan youd know that Captain Hook is a very blatant homosexual character. Not trans, I know, but still a queer character! I thought itd be worth mentioning.

Yeah ok thats basically all I have. I know there is a high chance his past secret has something to do with his scar and missing hand (a character we know of that made him like this maybe?) but I still really love the idea of him being queer in some way. Trans Croc DOMINATIONNNNNNN

[awetistic-things]

hi! i'm prof dxd autism, and i know you support self dx. i have some struggles understanding it, bc i guess,,, black and white thinking and i just,,, its very hard to make that connection, bc like, i want to support it but like theres also like, bad experiences with people claiming autism to weaponise something or all the news about fakers which might not even be true but like. im at the point where this is my view:

i support self suspecting a diagnosis, but not self diagnosis bc i think there needs to be some degree of seperation. like you can research one condition but have another, so self suspecting and accommodating is a good thing, but self diagnosis isn't because you don't have like, the full picture, and you need someone else to analyze it, so self suspect, not diagnosis. (sorry if not clear im kinda out of words rn)

but i also recognise that that view isn't really correct anymore, but im having trouble changing it so i guess what im asking is do you have any account to follow/things to read to support self diagnosis so i can change my views. totally cool if you dont want to tho. anyway bye! have a nice day. sorry.

hi 👋🏼

i can't find any specific blogs, but i do have a few things to say:

getting out of the black-and-white thinking is difficult, and i appreciate that you're trying to do so

self-diagnosing in general can be life-saving (when done right, which most of the time it pretty much is, regardless of what you see online) whether it comes to autism or breast cancer. so often, people get passed up and can't get what they desperately need due to discrimination within the medical community (and every community) so they have to take matters into their own hands

a lot of the time even when people go to get evaluated for autism, the doctor is the one who says they "suspect" the patient has autism and then don't give a diagnosis at all (happened to me three times before I got officially diagnosed) there are so many autistic people who go to get evaluated and get straight-up turned down right to their face, which usually leads them to self-diagnosing because there’s nobody willing to actually ‘analyze’ them in the first place (/nm, this reads as passive aggressive i think, but that’s not my intention, i promise /gen)

even if you are officially diagnosed there’s no telling that you’ll get any ‘analysis’ information after an evaluation (most of the time it’s just a paragraph or two) which is why self-diagnosing can be so incredible, because that’s when you get to analyze your own behaviors and traits and work through your internalized ableism so that if you do end up getting a diagnosis you’re not blindsided and have (hopefully) already accepted the fact that you are autistic

essentially what i’m trying to say is that so, so, so many psychiatrists and psychologists have internalized (or fully conscious) prejudice which heavily affects their analyzations and makes self-diagnosing so often times necessary

honestly, i think self-diagnosing is the first step in acknowledging and accepting that you’re autistic

i think many autistics who were officially diagnosed and were surprised by the fact that they’re autistic should look at it from a self-diagnosed autistics point-of-view

and by that i mean actually taking the time to forget whatever your doctor said about how you operate and instead analyze your life, because it’s yours, and nobody knows it better than you (especially from a 30 minute evaluation in a converted supply closet)

sorry if any of this came off as aggressive, it’s all genuine and i do very much appreciate you asking me this question and i hope my numerous different answers helped somewhat :)

[anakinthetrashking]

BnHA One-Shot Fic Recs (pt1)

Making some fic-rec posts has been on my to-do list for a while and I’m finally doing it, yay! Currently I have 6 word doc pages full of just BnHA recs. So I’m splitting them up by length and completion, so first up is (part one of) one-shots! Let’s go!!!

Lets start with some classic Izuku and DadMight!

Pictures, Posters and Tender Beauty by ProPinkist (tumblr: @dazais-guardian-angel ) Rating: G    Category: Gen   ~4,400 words Summary: Izuku has virtually every All Might-themed item out there, and prides himself on all of it, as Toshinori is well aware. However, somehow, the boy still decided that there was something vital missing. This is fluffy and very cute. No one truly appreciates All Might as much as Izuku does, but 1A comes close. All Might deserves all the love, and this fic truly provides!!!

Dear Mr. All Might by QuizzicalCrow (tumblr: @quizzicalcrow​ ) Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~5,000 words Summary: As the #1 hero for decades, All Might has collected a lot of fan mail over the years. Toshinori tracks down a series of letters that only now, years later, does he appreciate for their significance.  I always love the thought of All Might looking through his fan mail, even if he can’t get to all of it. This was a wonderful glimpse into that AND it was made to be so, so personal and sweet. Go have some heart-healing fluff.

Growing Pains by LordofLies (tumblr: @theangelofchildren ) Rating: G   Category: Gen    ~5,900 words Summary: Izuku finds himself changed by his encounter with the Hero Killer, but changes of a more physical kind are in store for him as he begins to truly accept One for All as his own. Once, he would have been thrilled to look more like All Might, but now those connections are as much a source of anxiety as they are of pride.Or, Izuku wakes up one morning and sees the world through different eyes. Izuku having anxiety and Toshi being there to help him through it and calm him down? Sign me UP. Its also a pretty cool take on how One for All is able to change things about it’s holder. Could this happen in cannon? Who knows.... Regardless, it was a great read!

I’ll Carry You Home by Renesvetta Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~2,700 words Summary: While training with All Might, it wasn’t uncommon for Izuku to be so exhausted at the end of the day that he unwittingly fell asleep without regard for where he was. It consequently became part of All Might’s routine to help his young protégé home. During that time, Izuku may have let loose more than one sleepy confession towards his mentor.  Yes, it is as adorable as it sounds. Its tagged with “self indulgent Dad Might fluff” which is both accurate and appreciated. In other words: Superb you funky little writer!

Simple Gifts by QuizzicalCrow Rating: G    Category: Gen   ~6,700 words Summary: One year ago, Izuku received the greatest gift he could ever imagine. Now he’s determined to return the favor for the one responsible for it all with a gift of his own.  First off, I love the idea of Izuku and Toshi quietly celebrating the anniversary of passing on OfA from All Might to Izuku. Even just taking the day to hang out with each other. It’s a really precious idea. But there’s not just fluff! Izuku finds himself in a fight, again. (cool villain quirk, too!) I love all of the small details that are in this fic (and in Crow’s other works, too!) anyway its exciting AND very heartwarming, so go read it!!!

Affectionate by Sevi007 (tumblr: @sevi007 ) Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~2,600 words Summary: Toshinori starts to show affection very easily around his students. The  reactions he gets for that are not quite the ones he had anticipated - well, not all of them, at least.  Toshi is LOVED, APPRECIATED, and 1A feels like HOME. how many times can i say “cute” and “heartwarming” on this post?? bc these are some amazing writers, whom I adore, and their writing makes my heart WARM. AND. FUZZY. i mean, even just the first few paragraphs of this one just, really sets the scene of what i like to believe the 1A dorm is (on a good day, lol). its a really nice read, so go treat yo’ self by reading it.

paint me in trust by dinomight Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~6,400 words Summary: The first mark Izuku gets is a slight brush of green across his temple. It’s the soft touch of a mother holding her son for the first time. Inko has one to match, the same shade of green staining the tips of her fingers. Hers is more noticeable; Izuku’s tends to blend into his hairline. He loves it anyways. He has to. It’s the only soulmate mark he has. (Or: how Izuku goes from just green to a rainbow, UA-style.)  Ok, so this fic sort of plays off the idea of soulmates, and does not fit in with soulmates in the usual form of the trope. First off its completely platonic. Its categorized as Gen and sticks to that. Also it doesn’t seem to be as obligatory and permanent as you would think it would be. It seems to be more of the universe telling you who has the possibility of being important in your life. I really really loved this, it was so adorable and gives you that sweet, sweet Izuku angst, before healing your heart with the power of friendship and found family!!!

The Die Has Been Cast by ChiwiTheKiwi (tumblr: @chiwithekiwi​ ) Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~5,400 words Summary: “There’s something about that kid you aren’t telling me, isn’t there?”When no answer meets him, Shouta tries again.“You know something about Midoriya’s quirk that you haven’t shared with me. Is that right?”(Or: A canon "What If" surrounding the latest manga events and focusing on Aizawa finally making a connection.) First off, this fic has spoilers for the manga, so dont read unless you’re past chp212! I loooooooove OfA reveal fics, especially when it’s Aizawa that finds out. He deserves to know!!! its kind of important!!!! This fic chooses a great moment to work off of, and does a great job with Aizawa’s character. I really enjoyed it and couldn’t keep myself from going back and reading it just now LOL

These last two are actually two-shots, but it makes it an even 10! also Izuku and dadmight, so we can continue the theme here...

Some Unspoken Thing by LittleKy Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~7,900 words (2chps) Green, Toshinori has always thought, is the color of life anew.(Or: It's time for Yagi Toshinori to finally accept that he has a son, now, in all but blood. It's time for Midoriya Hisashi to accept that as well.) YES ALL MIGHT! ADMIT THAT IZUKU IS YOUR SON! great portrayal of the characters and really hits the nail on the head for DadMight. and Izuku in this story is just the smallest green floof that you wish to give a hug. NEVER MIND ALL MIGHT, YOU TOOK TOO LONG SO IZUKU IS MY SON NOW AND IM NOT GIVING HIM BACK ( no but seriously i want to hug this fic its so cute TTuTT )

LAST BUT NOT LEAST! I See You by BirdAntlers (tumblr: @aarymk )

Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~15,400 words (2chps) Midoriya Izuku is a quirkless child, blind from birth. Yagi Toshinori is the most powerful man in the world, loved by millions. They could not be more different, and yet their loneliness is the same.   (From a pair of AU posts on Tumblr that got way out of hand; I wanted to put it here because it turned into more of a fic than a "what-if." Basically a vessel for me to vomit as much Dadmight as I can.) Hey, you! Yeah! You! Do you want to cry? Do you want to start sobbing in a public space?? Do you just want to be destroyed with words and be left there kneeling at the feet of a writer who has torn out your heart and stomped on it before they gently wipe the tears from your face? Yeah?? y oU Wan NA D IE??? READ THIS AND GET REKT.  you’ll thank me later

(under the cut is just me rambling, i kept all the important stuff up here, ur welcome)

Now that the actual recs are over I can rant here- look i really tried to slim my recs down, but i have almost 300 bnha fics bookmarked,some of them are “to read” or theyre in progress, etc but i managed to get this list sorta slimmed down? a little?(to only 58!!!) but as i was gathering this post together it felt like i dont have very many Dadmight recs on that list??? but i havent rechecked all the other fics i was just going through the oneshots. i... kinda read a lot more fics with AIzawa in it instead. it be that way. DadMight content is SO GOOD. but my fav is aizawa im sorryyyyy anyway i have another SEVENteeN oneshots to put in rec posts and that does NOT include the mulitchapter and friikin series and stuff... and like i said this is aaaaaaallllllllllllllll BnHA. batfam fic posts will come after, and then star wars, and then maybe star trek? we’ll see. i have a very specific taste in ST fics and that is Tarsus IV whump. which. i have not read in a while. when they say “that trope came from ST” for sooooooo many tropes, you WISH other fandoms had tarsus as a trope, holy crap it is TOP TIER angst fodder. if you love to write/read whump, angst, and h/c i would HIGHLY recommend that you take a bit of time and explore the content and stories there. heck maybe i will make a ficrec post for just tarsus angst. ok.

my INTENTION is to edit these posts later with little links to the other fic rec lists so that itll be easier to find. but., its me, so itll either happen in painful detail or not at all

asdjkdgh its 2:30am and i need to sleep and not be rambling incoherently again I WILL SAVE THIS AS A DRAFT. 

[microfeelings]

Well you know what they say, if you want to get things out there you... have to get things out there

So Fantasy AU with Game Grumps

Tbh i dont know how this started... It might have been something along the lines of Dan would make a great bard, and Suzy is totally a druid... and everything went downhill from there, but also, who knows how my brain works there is like 4 trains of thought at the same time and they're all roughly have the same thoughts if that makes sense? So I'm thinking of something in 4 different ways and its hard to pinpoint from wich train the idea came from... yall still with me? Cause I tend to ramble when I'm panicking (and also dont know what I'm doing)

The idea is basic dnd party doing missions all over the fantasy land and nearly dying/accidentally destroying cults in the process of getting to the big plot (WICH I DONT HAVE LMAO, remember that comic about the "oh man, two cakes" guy? This is me presenting the ingredients of the cake and calling it a day, I am so sorry, my brain is way over the place to get you something better)

So far I have three paragraphs and is like 80% rambling, I feel like a deer in the headlights. Anyways so the characters;

Arin: half orc barbarian, dont know how to describe my decision other than.... big arms. And also, not to be thirsty on main he would look so good with tusks (sidenote: I love half orcs, never played dnd but honestly i would probably only ever play half orcs). Basic adventurer, left the place he grew up with when he was of age to find himself and get stronger, also since he kinda didnt like himself he tried to get rid of his tusks and long hair, but eventually left them to grow. Always travels with a companion and that doesnt always end well. Sweet, kind and funny, he makes friends wherever he goes, but also lots of enemies (like a lot of people want him death, even demons, and Arin still doesnt understand why cause hes not the worst person ever come on) its hinted through foreshadowing (i talk like this is a fucking show) that he is a vessel for an old moon/sun god, or is the moon/sun god reincarnated and he hasnt remembered yet. And by implied I mean, I've been playing with the idea, but I dont know if I'll follow through (at least its a plot)

Dan: elf bard, of roughly 250+ years, hes got the most experience in the bunch as an adventurer but also feels out of time because he slept through 50 years straight cause he was sick, when he woke up he found out lots of people he knew had died and that kinda fucked him up. Diplomatic in a tipical bard fashion (he will fuck his way out of the mess) but an experienced swordman as well (with both a longsword and a rapier). When he first woke up he got the first job that he could manage (mercenary) where he met Brian, he later left the job because it didnt feel right with him, and started travelling on his own, he met Arin and started travelling with him cause friendship and also barbarian here to make sure you dont die in battle you squishy elf

Suzy: elf druid, keeper of a forest near where Arin lived a season, befriended him when he was younger, never left the forest cause it was her duty to protect it, but it got invaded by a group of mercenaries and it got impossible for her to drive them off (like come on, she is strong, but its really hard to drive off like 50+ people) she tried to ask for help in the nearby towns but nobody came to her aid for being the witch of the forest, until eventually Arin and Dan accepted to help her, she later joined them in adventures. Her body is covered in tattoos, and is trying to convince Arin and Dan to get one as well (pls). Her favorite forms to take are bear, snake and spider (to scare Dan)

Ross: tiefling warlock. The first person to travel with Arin when he was younger, they met when Ross initially tried to kill Arin but failed, they became fast friends and also ride or die for each other, and Ross would never tell him that his patron ordered to kill him and his initial intent was to do it, but ended up liking Arin too much to get trough with it. Loves to antagonize Dan for the sake of it and sometimes gets jealous of him (I was his friend first) wraps his tail around Arin when he gets scared/is sleepy and Arin thinks its adorable

Brian: human rogue. Part of a mercenary crew that is absolutely despicable, met Dan when he first woke up and accepted him as the only partner (he killed all the others) since Dan fell asleep below a tree near the town Brian grew up with, and troughout his life he always saw Dan sleeping under a tree and now hes awake asking for a job here? You stick with me, I promise not to stab you (too much). Since he has a wife and daughter he want to leave the life of mercenary, so Arin agrees to help him kill his own boss (A+ on the handling things boys)

And then there is Barry, who I want to be a recurring character but I never really got into GG until he wasnt there so I dont know a lot about him, and theres a bunch of other characters that are definetly a part but also there is only so much I can write here and theyre kinda more like background

I write like those old fanfic writers who are always interrupting their own work but instead of pluging in something like 'lmao im crazy' im having a panic attack

Also I feel like I need to say this, this is technically polygrumps? But like most romance in any tv show, it add nothing to the plot, I just like shipping

[checaria]

hey this is a genuine question, can i get your opinion? i like ripped xl but also in canon it states that he fits the petite wedding dress around the waist, the female clothes during the brocade thing were drawn to him, and he tricked the other monks by having his shoulders exposed. i dont think there’s a problem w/ having a fem/androgynous look to xl while still keeping him ripped, yet ppl are rlly against that but praise hc if he’s depicted as feminine. 1/2

WHEW a lot on my mind, but yeah i agree that headcanoning characters as whatever top/bottom/switch based on stereotypes is always gonna be uhhh.......skeevy, like nothing dictates a person’s preference irl 

and same!! i love that mxtx describes xl as being able to pass in the women’s wedding dress because of his petite waist, but she also specifically states that his face is unmistakably that of a young man’s (altho the makeup helped him afterwards) and that the moment he moves his arms he rips the dress LOL, i think its a neat contrast because others who dont know him are surprised at his martial strength hidden under his unassuming trash god persona

as for hua cheng, we dont really get as many details except for the paragraphs of swooning that xie lian narrates about how handsome hc is, but then again hua cheng is able to change his appearance quickly so he can range anywhere from 16yro delinquent to.....Ghost King Supreme

i think (and i would hope that!!) people like seeing ripped/top xl and feminine/bottom hc not because of surface level stereotypes, but because we don’t get much of either in canon text; its just something to explore outside of canon and fans all tend to ride one wave together when an idea gets popular

like i dont think most fans have the intent of “xie lian is ripped therefore he tops” or “hua cheng is a skinny little twink SO HE BOTTOMS”, and im giving everyone benefit of the doubt here

at least in my mind i interpreted it simply as  “xie lian is absolutely strong enough to lift hua cheng, that’d be.......kinda hot to see how that plays out in the bedroom” LOL ;; same for hua cheng...because fans already know from mxtx’s interview and the extras that hua cheng canonically tops and is literally op in bed so in my head im like “thats hot but i also want to see how things would play out if he bottomed”, and it’s not like..he Has to be feminized for that to work out

because for hualian i personally ship it in a multitude of ways, thats kinda..how they are in the novel anyway! and it's not something Dictated by their visual appearance or physical strength, though yaoi tropes are still...somewhat ingrained in fandom spaces, i think that’s kinda unavoidable when a series gets popular unfortunately

i guess i never really thought of this as a big issue, im sorry if you’ve seen a lot of hypocritical things, i hope you don’t lose too much time thinking on this, it’s not worth the strain!! please ship hualian however u wish!! 

[laurent-ofvere]

i'm sort of curious about your fic writing process. what do you start with? how do you get through tough parts? do you edit/revise? how do you know if an idea is worth writing?

WHY DOES EVERY ANSWER I EVER GIVE TURN INTO AN ESSAY IM SO ANNOYING YOU DONT CARE THAT MUCH 

1. when i first started writing fic i would start wherever i wanted, i would put down a scene that was currently in my head and then work around that. now i typically make myself write in chronological order, tho im not entirely sure why i restrict myself to it. i think its bc my writing consistency/interest has gone down considerably, and unlike before im more likely to drop something in the middle, so i dont allow myself to jump the gun bc im afraid ill write the parts that interest me most, and then be more inclined to let the fic go bc i got the fun bits out of my system. (but! i daydream the fic completely out of order, and i have notes of random lines/scenes that will happen that can span the entire thing. its all out of order and basically in gibberish code and would make sense to no one but me)

2. depends what you mean by tough parts. if its tough bc its one of those parts you dont care about/enjoy but just gotta get through, i basically do just that. its like dragging my feet but it needs to be done. if you mean tough like the mechanics of it are tough to write, ill write whatever i can and then just drop it, probably read over non related scenes and work on those, then come back with a fresh perspective and see what new ideas come to me. kinda like taking study breaks? when you spend hours going over one thing and reach a point where you’re like “i know what i know and at this point im going in circles” so you break for a while and when you pick it back up you can absorb it differently. its like that but im producing instead of consuming. also, ill occasionally just rant my head off to someone (i have a specific person for this) even if shes not online, ill just word vomit everything im thinking about the scene/situation and essentially have a long conversation with myself, and she’ll either help work through it bc we’re very likeminded on capri or ill reach a point in my yelling where it just clicks. 

3. FUCK yes i do. my first drafts are absolute garbage, if for whatever reason i send someone new a draft i give a paragraph long disclaimer like “ignore this and this and this and this and ITS GONNA BE EDITED I PROMISE” technical edits aside, the first version of my fics are like the skeleton of the story. single lines become paragraphs, small things get fleshed out, details get added etc. i add something new every time i re read, and i do the thing mentioned above with tough parts where i let it chill untouched for a while and then come back with fresh edits (slight lie, i dont leave it alone that long anymore, bc impatient and careless) 

4. i mean, how do you ever know? i wont lie, knowing that there are people who are interested and hype for it makes it worth it, but i‘d never write something i dont personally care about just bc others do, so its a steady combination. but i know its really worth writing if i truly have fun with it, if it sparks joy, if i think about it sporadically, all that. the first thing i wrote for nikandros pining over laurent was with no intentions of being posted, i just couldn’t stop thinking about it and writing those feelings out was fun and cathartic. 

[astronomifier]

Magnus Relisten Eps 11 & 12

ok, holidays are officially over so might be a bit more regular about this. Time for Dreamer and First Aid

Episode 11: Dreamer Case #0151403 Statement of Antonio Blake, regarding his recent dreams about Gertrude Robinson, previous Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute

So this episode is definitely Good. The question is if its great. And honestly? i don’t think so. I’ll explain my reasoning, but lets start with the good. First of all: atmosphere. This episode lives, breathes, and is atmosphere. It’s not scary, not in a horrifying vampire ripping into your throat kind of way at least, but it has this plodding sense of dread that’s really nice. Especially when you’re someone with an existential fear of death’s inevitability, like i am. It also has a good bit of meta-plot boosting. I dont remember if we already knew gertrude was dead or not, but if we didn’t, jon doesn’t treat it as a surprise. What is a surprise though is that she was afraid when she died, and the fact that she seems to be special to the dream-tendrils in some way, what with the red light. This is interesting, but it does bring me to the first issue with the episode: that its clearly building up new questions surrounding Gertrude Robinson for the sake of the mystery, but not really clear what those questions are? like, ok, it wants you to be asking “how did gertrude die”, but it didnt make it very clear that that was what it wanted to be asking. I don’t know, this feels even to me like a nitpick, but having interesting unanswered questions floating around is so good for a solid mystery series, and  i feel like the show has only barely been scraping by in that regard! (i should note that this kinda plays in to my broader thought, which i dont think ive voiced here, that s1 is the weakest season due to its overly episodic feel).

Anyways, second and much larger criticism: yno how I said this episode instills a plodding sense of dread? Yeah, emphasis on “plodding”. This episode is super slowly paced, and while it feels intentional, i think they took it too far. I def zoned out a bit during this listen dispite myself, and i distinctly remember doing the same the first time through. i mean the episode is only 25 minutes long but it felt to me longer than “a father’s love”, which is a full 10 minutes longer! And, I guess as a result of being shorter than it seemed, i cant really say that all that much happened in that time. I dont know what they could have fixed here, but something was a bit off in a pretty serious way.

Before i give Dreamer its score, lets talk narrator. I did really like “Antonio Blake”. His conviction in the importance of what his saying combined with his brazen willingness to lie as he feels necessary, TO THE ARCHIVE, and therefore the audience, while announcing that he’s doing it... something about it just oozes charisma??? He just really seems like the first statement giver we’ve had with solid goals and motivations of his own... Well. Okay. Trevor Herbert did too, but he’s my other favorite narrator so far, so its a pattern.

anyways, 6/10. I like almost everything about the episode, but its slowness... its zone-out ability, brings it down to fairly average. But I don’t consider a 6 bad... just... gently good.

SPOILER PARAGRAPH: I’m mostly going to focus on “Antonio”, but first a brief note on the End. This isn’t our first End episode, technically, as we’ve met Mary Keay already, but it is the first fully End-focused episode, and the first that plays into my very strong fear response to the inevitability of death. Totally a personal thing, but it will shape my responses to future episodes with the theme. Anways, “Antonio”, or should i say Oliver Banks. I really wanted to say that this is the first avatar-as-statement giver, but i realized as i write this that thats just not true? Julia and Trevor from last time are a Hunter duo! I’m not sure why this episode read more “avatar-y” than the last two, but it definitely did. Maybe its because both julia and trevor’s actions are pretty much mundane in their episodes, in a way that Oliver/Antonio’s were not. Anyways, Oliver will come back quite a few times, mostly as tarot-shop cameos, but once as the focus in a very good episode that we will get to. As far as cameos, i know for sure that he shows up in S2′s grifters bone, and i think in Prentiss’s episode too? anyways, though hes a fairly minor avatar, he’s one of my favorites. That cold charisma, and the fact that hes more often a passive observer than actively evil are i think what do it for me. Shame that his debut has issues in other places for me.

Episode 12: First Aid Case #0121102 Statement of Lesere Saraki, regarding a recent night-shift at St. Thomas Hospital, London

i remember the first time i listened to this, it was... very confusing. Like, kinda in a good mystery way, but mostly in a just confusing way. Maybe i was a bit out of it, maybe its the benefit of hindsight, but this episode is a lot less confusing-in-the-bad-way on my second listen. Still a bit confusing, though, on a lot of the specifics, but i kinda have to wait for the spoiler section. Suffice it to say that it was mostly confusing in the good-mystery way. Of course, Gerrod Keay is back! hes still no more than a mysterious figure who seems to oppose some of the supernatural, but its a nice solid connection to an old statement. Helps that this statement is perhaps the most obviously, definitely true statement we’ve had so far. I will say though... the content of this episode wasnt that scary to me? like its clearly trying to be but its not spooking me. So all it really has going for it is the mystery element which i thought made the episodes plot a bit hard to follow, esp on my first listen. So big hits to there. 

Not much to say on this episode, except that for some reason i thought on first listen that this nurse might be the same person as the nurse from “Burned Out” but I’m not sure where I got that from though. maybe the fact that last episode had a pseudonym-user as statement giver, combined with the nurse-fire pattern? regardless there is no reason to believe it was true.

4/10. Sorry Gerry, Im down on this episode. It just wasnt scary enough, and the overly strong focus on planting vague mysteries make it hard to follow unless you already know the answers. Also the narrator is boring! structural issues dragged this one down quite a bit, im almost tempted to drop this one to a 3, its only the fact that i remember being a bit more scared on first listen that stops it.

SPOILER PARAGRAPH: Dispite posing quite a few now-answered questions, i find that there is surprisingly little to say here? Its a battle between Gerard Keay, agent of the Beholding, and a Lightless Flame cultist, from the perspective of someone who knows nothing about what’s going on. Easy Peasy. Gerry even says it himself with his “better the Beholding than the Lightless Flame” comment. Why so cryptic, Gerry? a couple things of note: this is the first of surprisingly few full-on statements where the Eye is outright part of the supernatural goings on, and one of the even fewer that is not related to specifically an Archivist or an institute head, though it is still connected. I have no idea what the quiet hospital-goers or security cam footage at the end are supposed to mean. That part seems more Web than anything, but the stinger at the end says that its fully Eye-related. I dont think we ever learn what happned to hospitalize Gerry ane Mr. Flame Guy, but its probably just that they got into a fight and LF culists = fire. A.K.A. the boring answer. Still, why it seemed to backfire, not killing Gerry while injuring the cultist? that could be interesting to learn. maybe there’s a future episode here, but I doubt it. Also, do we ever learn which cultist this guy is? im sure the s4 episode where Gertrude talks to a LF cult guy mentions it, but i dont remember these folks names very well. One last note in this very disorganized example of a spoiler paragraph: I had forgotten that the link between the Lightless Flame and Agnes wasn’t immediately made clear, which is funny given how deeply connected they are with hindsight. I like it, though. Keeps things mysterious.

[tacit-semantics]

going to be annoying real fast because im incapable of writing fic and not offering commentary on at least a paragraph, and so. Gonna go under the cut tho because it’s long and also common knowledge like there’s nothing new here I just want to infodump you know how it is

this section here was actually written before the rest of this fic and was what kickstarted it, and im kinda surprised it made it in because those generally dont. More inspiration statements than anything. There's really not much to the sentence itself i dont think, or nothing particularly innovative; its a pretty common structure and one i use a lot for establishing internal rhythms. use commas to control the reading speed and you can emulate the feeling of your narrator becoming less controlled or careful w/either their thoughts or speech as the passage continues, which in turn can be used to communicate anything from excitement to apathy (as in loss of energy) to confusion, depending on the context and how frantic you get with it. Anyways this is a pretty instinctive approach because it’s got its basis in an experience that’s common enough, which is to say a decrease in the ability to moderate the speed/content of your thoughts, speech, observations, etc as a result of strong emotion

as for the content of the sentence itself: a lot of its cohesion is dependent on similar words, (two, to, half) and like mirrored numerical ideas which is where a lot of the flow comes in. half of, times two, two to two, lifetime (implied whole), so on, so on. gotta keep them mostly the same length too, which leads into the point below this one. really as far as sentences go its just like. a sentence. intended to some degree as a standalone, as necessitated from a fic like this but also like. its a sentence.

The end sentence there is intended as a contrast point; in this specific fic, it's a callback to the reality of the situation. contrast in this context in pretty common, and the mimicry in tone is intentional. It's like how you can do rule of three deadpan humor by establishing a structural and content-based pattern and then changing the content for the third while maintaining the structure. Keeps the tone the same. Also necessary for anchoring; for context this fic'll be tagged five ways to hell with every variant of 'dissociation' i can think of, but regardless of the general feeling of being unmoored, there is the matter of the momentum or the actual fucking narrative. you have to tie it back so you can move on so you can build something coherent. so on, so forth. It’s actually what I do to build panic or unease in most situations: you build it up and reel it back in and then build it up and reel it back in over and over again, and in doing so you create the image of a person so affected by the events they’re experiencing/they’ve experienced that they’re unable to reframe or rephrase things. Happens to the best of us.

Anyways, that’s not all I’ve got but that’s all I feel like writing. I do not feel good. Such is life

[spoonass69]

just saw an article titled something like why its wrong to pathologize dating language and they got the actual like definition of love bombing and trauma wrong in the first two paragraphs, and then they went on to write a paragraph about how lots of examples of what actual love bombing would be were wrong because for it to actually be that kind of thing it has to be intentional. this is stupid as hell because a good manipulator always plays stupid and doesnt outright tell you yes im doing this thing on purpose in order to manipulate you. the person writing the article also seemed to believe that things like gaslighting and love bombing are just things that narcissists do. this person also as far as i know has no degree or anything in this field, it is an opinion piece.

i would also just like to point out that people (ive noticed specifically allistic people) do a stupid amount of casual gaslighting, and thats just one type of manipulation. ive found that this word has become more mainstream mainly because it is something that is very very common. these observations are coming from someone that has been researching types of manipulation since they had the reading comprehension skills to do so.

can you guys imagine why. people on the internet. would now want to push the narrative that something like gaslight has become a buzzword, and therefore has been watered down, and then say that when people say gaslighting they really mean lying? youd think the more helpful productive thing to do is encourage people to still take the word seriously because it happening a lot and therefore being used a lot is a causw for more concern not less? wouldnt it be better just to believe everyone instead of being skeptical of everyone, including victims, especially with gaslighting since it is a type of manipulation that can make it so that you dont trust your judgement at all?

but yk. people who like gaslighting people. and don’t actually wanna help. cant just come out and say that. they have to convince others that people who say theyre being gaslit arent credible. because its harder to gaslight someone when other people can validate them. or when they can describe what’s happening to them.

idk it just kinda seems like. you guys are all. not thinking about these things hard enough. and probably just putting more people in danger. with the way people are acting towards “buzzwords” that concern mental health and abuse

[mattcursedghost]

I did not expect that paragraph. Anyways we used to talk a little but you weren't interested so I decided to leave you to it. I even remember getting upset and telling a mutual tumblr friend (someone I believe you're close to or was at that point, you reblogged from them earlier) how it upset me haha.But it's going seeing you on my dash again. I hope you're doing okay. 😊

One thing everyone knows about me is that i write paragraphs, sometimes paragraphs that people dont wanna read, its a problem i have. Also im kinda confused by this cuz if i didn't seem interested it is most likely cuz i dont believe people actually are interested in me, or my interests is to just be a good friend, or maybe i was being loyal to someone i was interested in, i think people like the idea of me but when it comes down to it they all back out, mostly all blocking and removing me after cuz they dont understand how i could find them important and how im just a weirdo for liking them, caring, or something like that 🤷‍♂️. I dont throw people away and im constantly on tumblr so i havent disappeared or anything, i dont mean to upset anyone, i dont hide anything and my dms are always open, im not really sure who this is and i think something is misunderstood here cuz my intentions are always to be a friend, if u wanna message me u can and i dont make it to where people cant.

[ihateeveryoneincludingmyself]

i don’t think anyone I know irl has my tumblr so I’m just gonna vent here.

so in May I met this girl on tinder, and we hit it off super fast and we talked nonstop it was honestly pretty overwhelming because I didn’t remember what it was like to have someone into me. she was trying to move very quickly and I’m very emotionally unavailable so I didn’t want to get into a relationship with her.

we remained friends. super good friends. she even considered me her best friend which I didn’t even know she felt that strongly until we started to fight. thought I was just some dude she talked to when she wasn’t hanging out with her irl friends.

our first fight happened when I realized how deeply she’s into the awful college student drinking partying culture. to be clear because this is something she doesn’t fucking understand, I DONT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH DRINKING! I DRINK, EVERYBODY I KNOW DRINKS!! but every week sometimes multiple times a week she would drunk text me random stupid shit like she couldn’t even spell properly and like she doesn’t remember shit in the morning you know like, actually fucking drunk. i can’t stand how people think that’s normal or okay. if you can’t control your drinking then don’t drink. if you can control, then have a couple drinks! enjoy yourself! BUT THERES A POINT WHERE YOU ARE DESTROYING YOURSELF. okay so here’s why I’m extra sensitive about this topic. my parents were alcoholics. also did heroin n shit but yeah I wasn’t allowed to live with them. and every time I see someone fucking wasted, it reminds me of them. i remember my grandpa taking me to restaurants to visit my parents and by the time we finished eating they were drunk. couldn’t even talk to them as a little kid. I lost my childhood due to alcoholism. i know this girl is just a college student partying blah blah blah but it can lead to worse and like.... seriously who the fuck wants to talk to someone who can’t even produce sentences? when you’re that intoxicated it’s simply not healthy even if I didn’t have trauma related to alcohol I would probably still be concerned. anyways, I progressively got more angry with her. i said a lot of things I shouldn’t have . i tore her apart in response to my anger. i hate myself for the way I treated her, but GUESS WHAT? she still doesn’t listen to me. still regularly getting wasted and it fucjing pisses me off because she goes around telling people that I don’t let her DRINK. LIKE SHES MISSING THE WHOLE FUCKING POINT!! IM GOING TO COPY AND PASTE EXACTLY WHAT I SAID BEFORE I GOT INTO DETAIL ABOUT THIS: I DONT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH DRINKING! I DRINK, EVERYBODY I KNOW DRINKS!! but every week sometimes multiple times a week she would drunk text me random stupid shit like she couldn’t even spell properly and like she doesn’t remember shit in the morning you know like, actually fucking drunk. i can’t stand how people think that’s normal or okay. if you can’t control your drinking then don’t drink. if you can control, then have a couple drinks! enjoy yourself! BUT THERES A POINT WHERE YOU ARE DESTROYING YOURSELF.

anyways, now as I said she still fucking gets wasted all the time,BUT SHE DOESNT TALK TO ME. but she posts about it on her Instagram story (which I’m blocked from seeing but.... I have my ways🤷🏻), she talks to other people JUST NOT ME. THAT WASNT MY FUCKING INTENTION WITH MY SERIES OF INTERVENTIONS. I WANTED HER TO BECOME MORE RESPONSIBLE WITH ALCOHOL? AND THEN SHE CAN ENJOY A DRINK AND STILL TALK LIKE A NORMAL FUCKING HUMAN BEING. GOD IT MAKES ME SO FUCKING ANGRY TO KNOW THAT SHES STILL BEING WHAT I LIKE TO CALL A GLORIFIED ALCOHOLIC, BUT SHE JUST DOESNT DRUNK TEXT ME ANYMORE.

ooh then another fight.... I was venting to an NOW EX FRIEND FUCK THAT BITCH SHE BOILS MY BLOOD JUST THINKING ABOUT HER of mine ..... AND THIS MOTHERFUCKER GOD I FUCKING HATE HER FOR WHAT SHE DID.... DECIDED TO SNITCH ON ME AND MESSAGE THE GIRL AND TELL HER THAT I WAS VENTING. AND SHE MISINTERPRETED AS ME “TALKING SHIT” WHEN I NEVER EVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT HER IN A NEGATIVE LIGHT. SOME PPL SAID “SHES TOXIC” I ALWAYS FUCKING DEFENDED HER BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH WE WERE FIGHTING I STILL ADORED HER. so yeah that put even more tension on our friendship. AND I DROPPED THE SNITCH GIRL RIGHT AWAY, I WILL NEVER FUCKING FORGIVE HER BECAUSE MY FRIENDSHIP WITH THE GIRL COULDVE BEEN SAVED IF IT WASNT FOR HER. FUCK HER. I FUCKING HATE HER SO MUCH AND NOW THEYRE FRIENDS AND COMMENT ON EACHOTHERS POSTS AND IT PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH.

anyways, like I mentioned I said a lot of terrible things to her. i was really fucking angry and I said some terrible things which I deeply regret and I tried apologizing and making it up but now already our friendship was messed up.

also, she eventually ended up getting a boyfriend and like, if I said I wasn’t a little jealous I’d be lying but I was the one who rejected her in the first place so 😳😳it’s whatever. but she told her boyfriend everything about me and this guy now hates my guts LOL . ever since she started dating the guy she talked to me less and less.

and during a short period of time when we weren’t fighting I introduced her to a friend of mine and now they talk a lot and she likes him more so YES IM FUCKING JEALOUS AND I FUCKING HATE MYSELF.

but this friend of mine she started talking to leads me to my breaking point. so you know she’s been distant because apparently every time we talk it’s a fight but I’m like BUT WHY?? and this next fight will show exactly how ITS NOT ALL MY FAULT, SHES TO FUCKING BLAME AS WELL!!

so she’s been ignoring me for a couple days after a PETTY FIGHT THAT I FELT WAS LITERALLY NOTHING JUST A SILLY LITTLE FIGHT THAT IDC ABOUT. basically she got mad because I was bullying that friend of mine about his league of legends stats 🤣 literally a fucking video game that she doesn’t like and she’s mad at me for TEASING MY FRIEND.

so I got kinda sad.... like why is she ignoring me??

she eventually responded after I sent her a looong paragraph with some identifying info so I’m not gonna show it. BUT HERES WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT HOW SHE ISNT GONNA TALK TO ME WHILE SHES GETTING DRUNK !!

okay the next screenshot has more identifying details so I’m not gonna share but basically she LIED TO ME SAYING SHE HAD NO SERVICE FOR 3 WHOLE DAYS BLAH BLAH BLAH WHILE I COULD GET PROOF THAT SHE WAS TEXTING MY FRIEND LIKE EVERY CHANCE SHE GOT . HE TOLD ME THEY STILL TALKED AND SHE WAS PURPOSELY IGNORING ME BC IM TOO STRESSFUL FOR WHATEVER. BUT SHE FUCKING LIED ABOUT IT

so basically, here’s how it’s not just my fault . yes, getting angry is my fault I could be a little less harsh. im working on it. BUT THIS GIRL HAS BEEN IGNORING ME FOR DAYS AND THEN LIES TO ME?? COME ON ISNT THAT A VALID REASON TO BE UPSET

anyways this is the last thing I sent her before deactivating my Instagram (I have her number too but we rarely talk on there). but the fact that she said we aren’t friends anymore.... broke my fucking heart. I broke down in tears. I had to stop myself from hurting myself or saying something dumb. so I ended it there.

i tried to hard to fix what we once had. yes, I’m at fault for being a dick and not being able to control my anger. but she’s at some fault for giving me valid reasons to be upset. i tried to hard to fix our friendship. but the more I try the more angry I get. she isn’t going to listen to me. she doesn’t even care about me anymore. it’s over.

ive been pretty suicidal lately. a few months ago I started cutting myself again after years and I hate myself for it. i pushed everybody away. she was the last person I regularly talked to. maybe now I can take a break from the fighting, try to get to a better place mentally, and try to get back in touch with some of my other friends, or make new friends.

idk I’m still very upset but this long ass vent that no one is gonna read helped a lot. this all happened over a few months and today was where I ended it. time to start a new chapter I guess

[charlie-artlie]

hhhhhggrrrmmhhhgggggggg aaaaaaa ok i got on in this white hell box to start slamming rvb s15 but that ep10 was so good!!!!!!! click below to watch me go back and forth on this topic for like 5or10 paragraphs lmao!!!!!!!!!

ok so lemme start with things i like which 

1). UHG??? that beach scene!!!!!!! perfect amazing perfection everything ive ever wanted???!!!!????!!!! they held hands im literally crying my hands were over my face the whole time like!!!!!!! AAAAAA so that was great

2). i........ like temple. even tho i got spoiled about him being a villain  i still thought the reveal was good and i have such a soft spot for smarmy yandere style “im gonna emotionally torture u :)” villains. it also probably doesnt help that i love and miss church so hes a fun stand in on that front AS WELL AS a stand in as tuckers new evil boyfriend now that felix is a pancake

2.5). unrelated but did we get confirm on felix being dead??? he aint dead til i see a body jussaiyin...

3). i have mixed feelings on church coming back that ill get into but church is maybe my favorite character so ultimately i view that as a plus?

4). i really put this one off cuz i was still reeling over this newest episode but all the potential grif development (and by extension red team development as a whole) that looks like its gonna happen this season has got me bittin the pillow like i kid u not im on the edge of my seat fam

ok but like. now onto the real shit. (THIS GOT SO LONG SHIT)

the one thing that is really REALLY holding me back from fully enjoying this season is wanting to know what the crews fuckin intentions are with this show. like. im gonna go ahead and put my hat on the fuckin table or whatever but season 13 was an ending. it was  good fucking ending too (and i know someones gonna go back and pull up receipts of me a year or so ago begging for a continuation season after s13 ended but dont do that pls) and to continue after an ending like that with a time skip like that makes this whole season feel like an epilogue to me? like a clean up? like there were some loose ends were tying up.

like. if theyre serious about this season and about ALL these new characters theyre bringing up then were looking at an arc here. like its gonna have to be to bring this to a proper close after all this extra shit?? they cant comfortably bring this to a close in one season

like what are they planning????whats the point of all this????

i honestly wouldn’t even  be so bent out of shape about it all, like it wouldn’t seem like such a stretch but the fact that we’re introduced to this season with dylan, who is also, largely, framed as a main character this season. who is. a new character. :/

like i get the narrative tool of using a reporter to drag your characters out of retirement for “one last job” (again, kinda framing it to be one season which worries me!) but whyyyyyy do we have to go through all this stuff with dylan and jax??????? like W H Y do we have to go through the same relationship development we’ve seen like three times already?????? jax is characteristically indistinguishable from caboose, so like???? weve seen this before!! the cold cynical “i dont need friends im just doing my job” person getting frustrated by having to deal with the idiot heart-of-gold tagalong who refuses to hate them no matter how mean or terrible they are like?? we saw it with church and caboose. we saw it later with wash and caboose. we saw it with church and caboose againnnnnnnn. we even kinda saw it with tucker and palomo!!!!! like whats the point of repeating this scene again and again!!!! we get it cynical mean assholes deserve unconditional love too i guess!!!!

like i just cant really get into it. and i dont even really mind dylan like i like her a lot more than i initially thought i would but i already can pretty much see the direction her character arch is going so im just sorta like shrug. shes gonna push jax until he leaves and then...........only then..........will she learn how much she should have valued his unconditional love.................even if he annoyed her and they didnt get along objectively in any way shape or form. but since he likes her then its her job to reciprocate even if she doesnt get anything out of the relationship at all. also she shot him. but whatever their friendship is beautiful (didnt know i had this much salt over this particular subject lmao whoops)

ok so narratively i only see two reasons to do this and im not crazy about either

1). theyre building up to draw some parallels between dylan and like wash or church or s/t but again i dont see the reasoning like why is this season framed around teacher dylan an important lesson about friendship you brought the show back from the jaws or death to give my a character arc for a new character????

2). this its more significant than it seems (i.e. theyre not who we think they are, i mean, its pretty suspicious we only have jax’s stage name rn) like theyre more significant players than we’ve been led to believe

(((also also im with grif on the whole bringing church back thing lmao. like WE DID THIS ALREADY??? there were a lot of AI why dont we ever go on an epic quest to save any of my other favs like oh idk TEX?????????!!!!!!!!!???????)))

but really tho my real and true problem is that i cant tell why theyre still making episodes. is it because theres still a story here that needs to be told or just because they can. and i know my hangup with this mostly stems from one interview i saw after s13 ended with miles and burnie where burnie pretty much said “yea if i had it my way uh i would end it here but hey it is what it is :/” and that just sorta struck a cord with me. maybe because he was a writer and one of the original people who created it i was sorta uncomfortable with taking the show places he didnt want to take it (and i could be TOTALLY off base with this assessment!!!! like i dont know how burnie really feels about this show rn he could be totally digging the new stuff this is just a personal things thats a hangup in just my own head!!!!)

ok so i think i covered pretty much everything i needed to say about this season so far if you actually read this far thanks if u gave up and skipped to the end then i have one last food for thought:

im gonna be the huge stick in the mud who says it: people are putting way too much faith in a company that is still using donut to make cheap gay jokes by actually thinking grimmons is going to become canon and im sorry that youre going to be disappointed. what we are going to get is a unsatisfying reunion and subsequent make up a la church and tucker in s12 and thats it.

thats not what i want to happen thats what i believe will happen. i am FULLY prepared to eat my own hat if im wrong. you may consider this text post legally binding

[bwicblog]

SA: i have never seen a small troll so happy in my life.

SA: I bought them ice cream.

TT: what flavor TT: if you say smTh like vanilla you are going To a(\/)Tually die

SA: why do you hate vanilla so much?

SA: I bought them what they liked best.

SA: it was butter pecan.

ID: guess what chat, i'm bored and bitchy so someone should give me a reason not to be.

ID: or a reason to be more bitchy. that works too.

DD: i think i would prefer to give you a reason to be less bitchy

DD: and in light of that it might be worth asking what you are feeling bitchy about!

DD: you can think of it as talking about your problems but also lets be real gossip is fun and bitching about yout bitchy feelings is cathartic

ID: pff well at least you're honest about why you're concerned. =:P i'm just bitchy because of some stuff that happened that i'm not about to share on the chat. for fear of the wrong eyes seeing.

ID: so sorry, no gossip!

DD: well thats unfortunate clearly i have no reason to keep talking to you DD: im joking of course i am sorry that bad things happened the fun part of gossip is getting together with friends to trash talk the people you dislike not the nature of the suffering itself DD: in the end it is my overall preference that my friends do not feel shitty DD: and as we have totally established we are at least on the first tier of friendship >:D

ID: you a trash talking pro then there daz? =:P i'll have to remember not to upset you. so you can't drag my good name through the mud.

ID: the first step of a long climb, you gotta be dedicated to this friendship.

DD: well okay to be honest i am not usually the one doing the trash talking unless it is in respect to my mechanical equipment some of which has developed an attitude as a result of the artificial intelligence frames i have installed to assist me with my work but that is more affectionate trashtalking like one might perform when calling their pet cuttlefish fat DD: mostly it is my friend trash talking but when i have issues i have to acknowledge usually it is me messing up like it was earlier with prisma and in those cases i just kind of go be by myself a bit because trash talking is fun but me crying to someone is significantly less so

DD: and of course i am dedicated or well as dedicated as i have reason to be which is to say you are fun to talk to and i can see myself doing so for the forseeable future but i am afraid i am not yet ready to lay down my life for you no matter how much colorful claw varnish you introduce me to

ID: man can you type. or is this a talk to text program. either way you're fast. and wordy.

ID: not saying its bad.

ID: before you get offended.

DD: i type very quickly but i am told i talk very quickly as well it is sometimes a problem but unfortunately i have a hard time telling when it is appropriate to stop because really i want to say all of the things that are relevant and i think theyre all important DD: also i am not offended dont worry you are only saying the truth

ID: and you should trash talk more, it's great.

DD: i dont really have anybody to trash talk though!

DD: except maybe the people on team jaycob

DD: they have awful taste that is quite worthy of trashing

ID: so far i don't think we've seen any of them around.

DD: the problem remains! 😦

DD: to clarify that is a sarcastic smiley i am not actually that torn up over the issue of not having a fight to pick with people and i am afraid i have been coming of as sufficiently ditzy lately that that may be unclear

ID: hahah, well. if it makes you feel better chat rooms are hard to guage that sort of shit.

ID: though some people put /s at the end of sarcastic remarks to indicate sarcasm.

DD: i feel like thats a little bit too on the nose sometimes

ID: also the colorful claw varnish is the best and you're really missing out by not going out and purchasing some that changes color.

DD: but its still probably better than a long paragraph explaining my intentions so i will keep it in mind!

ID: it's hella fun to run under different temperatured water.

ID: just use it when you reallllyyyy don't want someone to get offended.

DD: and oh dear well that is what we are going shopping for later isnt it! DD: there is not very much of anything at all to buy here in such a small town though admittedly the local burgers are delicious and its always more fun to buy that sort of thing in person with friends than just ordering it online for drone delivery

ID: because when they're already het up a long explanation can make it worse.

DD: why would people be offended?

ID: also yeah you probably went to the same burger place as i did with gliese and they had some fantastic burgers.

ID: because it can come off as...

ID: what's the word.

ID: that means you're talking down to a troll because you think they're dumb.

DD: condescending!

ID: that.

DD: and oh dear that makes sense DD: i think that was the issue with my apology explanation earlier as well DD: i was worried that i might be misrepresenting myself and i did not want prisma to think i was acting out of malice but really it came off like i thought he was dumb

DD: that sucks 😦

ID: yeah, it's a slippery slope of being understood and coming off as a prick.

ID: slipperier for you since you're a fish.

DD: !!

DD: what do you mean

ID: ....look, you know how stereotypes work right.

ID: the biggest stereotype for a fish for us lowbloods is that every troll with fins is a jerk.

DD: i have had little experience with socializing with large numbers of people DD: i have had much experience with watching tv

DD: and oh dear

DD: ... i guess i knew that i just didnt really think about it or how it might apply to me

ID: yeahhh. see you're in a position where you can just. not apply things to yourself and be safe doing it.

ID: where us lowerbloods have to be more wary and careful.

ID: better to assume a highblood is gonna mess you up. rather than trust one and get fucked up. y'know?

DD: ... yeah

DD: that makes sense DD: D:

DD: ... do i maybe come off like a person that would mess somebody else up though like generally stereotypes aside

ID: well i mean.

ID: if you were really devoted.

ID: some fish like to play the long con.

DD: the long con??

DD: i mean i understand what you mean i just dont understand why that would be something that you might be concerned about somebody else doing

ID: ...because i like living.

ID: and am also maybe a little paranoid.

DD: hm! DD: i am just asking because i mean yes i understand that i am a seadweller and this means i am sturdier than most lowbloods but also there are other seadwellers fully capable of hurting me too both physically emotionally socially and financially and in fact i have recently narrowly escaped an assassination attempt but i suppose i still do not see that much reason to be consistently concerned about somebody playing a long con on me DD: thought maybe that is why somebody tried to cull me so you may have a point in that respect

ID: hahah why did they try to assassinate you...? =:/

ID: is that what happened to your horns.

DD: yes!

DD: and i suppose it is because i am one of the two chief executives of a very rapidly successful starship tech company and there are some issues with you know brand competition

DD: and resentment because the field thus far has been dominated primarily by long-standing memebers of it an i am fairly young as well as the issue that well

iD: oh. yeah. cut-throat business, they don't like the new fish muscling in on things. i get it. i mean it's shitty but i understand.

DD: one of the other recent entrants into the field of helmstechnology development is qpin and they are uniquely known for their ruthless competitiveness though of course i cant strictly say that they were behind it

DD: though my co-ceo says it was likely them because the queenpin is the head and she has a lot of trouble in terms of competitiveness on account of being a jadeblood

DD: but all of that is politics and i am afraid that i am not particularly great at it and i have no idea who it was

ID: ...also jeesh i guess i should have. expected you to be working on helm shit since you're at the helm station. i'm kinda glad you're not allowed to talk about what you're developing now.

ID: but congrats on not dying.

ID: or becoming too maimed to continue working.

ID: sorry about the horns though.

DD: thank you!!

DD: i appreciate your celebration of my narrow avoidance of death : P

DD: also what is wrong with as you phrased it helm shit?

DD: i will refrain from talking about it if it makes you uncomfortable but i am afraid i dont understand

ID: you're the only person who is apparently willing to chat tonight so i'm glad you survived long enough to chat. =:P

ID: i don't like helm shit. it's like.

ID: the text version of claws on a chalkboard for me.

DD: truly high accolades

SA: nobody asked if they wanted me in the chat :/

DD: and oh my goodness well i will keep that in mind

DD: umm

ID: pris! sorry, i assumed you were napping.

SA: i'm teasing.

DD: i think maybe the assumption was that you were not present on account of earlier hads said-

DD: oh

DD: oops

ID: =:P

ID: 💚

DD: 💜 >:D

DD: do you maybe have anything that you would like to trash talk about because we have recently arrived at the conclusion that it is a worthwhile endeavor but i have nobody to trash talk and hads is being very secretive about the source of his miffedness

ID: yeah pris, give us some trash talk. =:P

SA: oh.

SA: um.

SA: ...

SA: this is. rather hard.

DD: unless of course you would like to join hads in the club of secretiveness which i assume is alternatively titled the club of the subjects of the trash talking being potentially present in the chatroom at a later date?

SA: no, I have no secret salt. I have made most of it known.

ID: yeah pris is a pretty honest guy.

DD: oh in that case what is difficult?

SA: I do not tend to hold on to animosity for extreme periods of time.

SA: It takes energy I do not have.

SA: I would rather reserve it for stopping hadean from getting into a bonus fight after Ashley.

SA: let me think.

ID: =:PPPP

DD: oh dear DD: see that statement there sounds a little bit like salt though maybe perhaps not the sort that is meant to be a source of amusement

ID: i need a post-victory fight tho pris!

SA: i think that it's very stupid that high bloods become very offended when I enter their space.

SA: they can't stand the idea i have as much money as them.

SA: that is sufficiently salty.

DD: also i think i understand that i tend to not hold onto angry feelings for very long but i in general am a lot more inclined to be sad rather than mad

ID: i'll take it! that's some salt. fuck them for getting snooty.

DD: and i appreciate the pun there though i am not sure what you mean DD: i dont find you offensive to be around at all

ID: the stereotypical fish daz.

DD: oh this is about stereotypes again

SA: it must be hard to live life with such a fragile ego that because someone is well-tailored and capable of pulling several thousand out of their wallet in cash, you must threaten them as much as possible to feel powerful again.

ID: do i gotta punch someone for you pris?

SA: you do not need a post victory fight you need a post-victory ice cream and bandaids.

ID: =:PPPP

SA: also dazzle I am regularly somewhat salty at Hadean. it is the spice of our friendship.

DD: yes seconding hads though more in spirit of concern rather than desire to actually punch anybody what i mean is that it sounds like you recently had a bad experience

DD: is that why hads is the saltlick

SA: yes but taht's also because he's salty anyways.

SA: ❤

ID: is salt a spice now.

ID: 💚

DD: <3< ??

ID: what.

SA: i did not recently have one, no. It just happens when I leave the loft. I live in West Haven, which is majority high-bloods.

ID: no. definitely no.

DD: platonic spade i suppose but i cannot find it in blue

DD: or purple or green

SA: oh no. It's not like that at all.

SA: I thought salt was a spice... is something only a spice if it grows?

ID: idk.

ID: daz is salt a spice.

DD: i am going to say yes though mostly out of convenience for the sake of making puns and less because i actually know

SA: oh.

SA: well that's as good of an answer as any.

DD: although on the topic of growing i can at least say acid is often used to spice food underwater so

DD: there is at least that

SA: that sounds like. hell.

SA: but i suppose i won't judge i eat scorpions.

ID: ...how does. acid food taste...?

ID: does acid impart a flavor?

SA: is it citrus-y, dazzle

DD: that depends on the acid you use i suppose sometimes it is bitter and other times it is more sour and unfortunately i cannot tell you if it is citrusy on account of i have never had a citrus fruit though it does not taste much like orange candies if that helps

DD: also it is often used to cook food not just season it

ID: huh.

ID: weird.

SA: you should try an orange sometime. they are wonderful

DD: more weird than eating scorpions?? :{

DD: and apparently also squirrels

ID: i like berries the best out of fruit. but they're usually more expensive.

SA: I do not eat rodents.

ID: since they spoil quicker.

ID: i eat squirrels. =:P

SA: horrid.

ID: any port in a storm pris.

DD: i will have to try both oranges and berries in that case maybe even a smoothie consisting of both 😄

SA: do not do that.

SA: Orange is a very particular flavor.

DD: i am taking this landdweller food thing step by step

DD: oh

DD: interesting

SA: citrus pairs well with other citrus.

ID: try orange juice.

ID: that's easy to find.

SA: lemon and lime, for example. Or Mango and orange.

SA: yes.

SA: orange juice.

ID: mango is a citrus? =:????

SA: ,...I always thought it was.

SA: "While both citrus and tropical fruits are grown in warm climates, citrus fruits refer specifically to the genus of flowering fruits in the Rutaceae family, which include oranges, grapefruits and lemons as well as certain other species and hybrids such as the pomelo, key lime and citron. Mango is not a citrus"

SA: now I'm mad at Hadean for telling me mango is not a citrus.

DD: i think i will just buy a pile of fruit

DD: and see which ones i enjoy

SA: and ruining sweeps of disbelief.

ID: ...i mean. mangos are too sweet for a citrus.

ID: was my logic.

SA: are... are oranges not sweet to you.

ID: not as sweet as a mango!

ID: oranges have that citrus taste!

SA: make sure you learn how to prepare them, Dazzle.

DD: you mean you cant eat them raw??

ID: yeah but some of them you don't eat the outsides.

ID: like citrus fruits.

DD: maybe i can go to a fruit restaurant

SA: just putting a mango in your mouthi s not the most brilliant idea.

ID: but you can eat the outside of a mango can't you?

SA: no.

SA: you also can't eat the outside of a banana.

SA: or.

SA: You can but it will make you very sad.

SA: I learned this the hard way.

SA: It was unfortunate.

ID: 'Answer: Although the pit of a mango isn't considered edible, some people do eat the mango skin. The skin is bitter-tasting, but the peel contains several healthful chemical compounds, including powerful antioxidants mangiferin, norathyriol, and resveratrol.'

ID: i have no idea what any of those words mean.

SA: so the short version is it will make you sad.

SA: healthy.

SA :but sad.

DD: i need to be healthier i think but i do not want to be more sad

DD: but maybe the health will be making up for it because honestly most of my sadness as of late has come from my health

SA: are you of poor constitution?

ID: i'll be honest and admit i've never eaten a mango. so i was guessing on eating the skin.

DD: not usually!!!

DD: i am just

ID; adjusting to being on land?

DD: not used to living on the land and everything is very dry and my gills hurt a lot and everything tastes weird so i am also hungry all the time

DD: and also everything is very hot

SA: you would probably be happier in a bay area.

SA: why they let you move to a desert

SA: Is beyond me.

ID: because of the station pris.

SA: yes, but... why put it there.

ID: close to a lowblood settlement.

DD: because it is a remote location where i am unlikely to be found again by the person who previously attempted to assassinate me and also because there is a psionic training station that is located in the area on account of it being a lowblood locale with a high psionic concentration

SA: oh so abducting.

DD: and that is very useful for my research

ID: easy to lure them away from a shitty town to be experimented on.

DD: i mean i am

DD: unsure i would phrase it that way

DD: ... the luring not the town thing the town is pretty shitty

ID: good thing i did it for you.

DD: oh dear

ID: you're poor and life sucks and maybe your lusus is dead and you're scared.

ID: some highblood offering you candy if you come to his station sounds pretty good.

DD: actually i believe most of the recruiting is done through online means

SA: a more polite way of saying it would be that it is often easier to accept being an pet and know you are cared for than it is to be free and struggle.

ID: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ my point remains.

DD: and the payment tends to be in caegars and i know that is not what you mean i simply think you maybe are not representing it very accurately

ID: it's still sucky to do.

ID: most of those trolls have to choose between that and death.

DD: i mean it is also kind of sucky to work public service at a cafe but

ID: ...i mean a cafe doesn't screw things in to you.

SA: being a living experiment and test subject is very different from being subject to a screaming indigo about how their latte was not enough foam.

ID: you can leave a shitty cafe job.

SA: ...do they foam lattes...

SA: I dont know.

SA: I have the all the time, and I have never thought about it.

ID: and you're probably less likely to die in a cafe job.

ID: or fry your psi.

ID: and probably get culled for that.

DD: well i mean first of all the only test subjects are the two cerulean trolls i believe and also the people that volunteer to help me out but that part is not mandatory the main purpose of this station is to prepare trolls that have been conscripted for helmservice for an easier transition upon ascension and also accept anybody that would like to volunteer for the service without conscription not

DD: testing things really

ID: yeah well i bet if you asked a lot of wrigglers why they volunteered.

ID: you'd get a lot of 'i didn't have any other option' answers.

DD: hm

DD: i guess i do not know

SA: does it not

SA; unsettle you.

ID: you sure don't! but the first step is realizing you don't know.

SA: that our ships are using an archiac biotechnical method of power when we could built a technical system or a disocnnecting system for them.

SA: My pilot training used my inhibitor to join and disconnect me from a ship without hurting me in the slightest.

SA: and yet this isn't the norm.

ID: man you also hear those stories about them chopping a helms' fronds off.

ID: since they don't need them for anything.

DD: well as a starship technician i kind of have to argue your useage of the word archaic because the biotech we have developed is currently eons ahead of our purely mechanical methods of transportation which are heavily limited by both fuel systems and speed and also i am not sure that you are hearing accurate stories about limb removal that is definitely not a standard practice and would probably be actively detrimental to the process and helmsman adjustment and biowire integration DD: as would be constantly placing the pilot into painful situations upon connect and reconnect though maybe that may be the case withoutdated systems??? DD: the point of helmsman system design is to ensure a fluid and efficient connection

ID: ...huh.

ID: i mean tbh i never really paid attention to schoolfeeding about helms since. you gotta figure that stuff is just propaganda to make you think it's great.

DD: a decent amount of it probably is but that is the case with all fleet propaganda!! which is not necessarily a bad thing to be honest if you ask me personally because focusing on the negative aspects of a situation is never going to motivate anybody when you think about it regardless of what the job it

ID: i mean the ratio of cons to pros of some jobs are a lot easier to swallow than others. =:P

DD: that is very true DD: i would not want to be a garbage person i am not ashamed to admit this

ID: and i like walking.

DD: or a fighter like sipara i am fairly sturdy but i do not like being attacked

ID: if you could not tell by my adventurer lifestyle.

ID: and you can say that i can explore wayyyy more stuff in a ship but i'm pretty sure it is soooo not the same.

DD: haha yes that is true i suppose i do not consider it much considering i am both very fond of swimming over walking and also my experience on starships as a nonpsionic troll involves not very much walking anyways

DD: partially because i am stuck in my coon trying to adjust to orbit but also primarily because there is also not much room to walk

ID: ...i guess since i've already dived in to this ball of squick i might as well ask since you'd know best.

ID: does like. your kind of psi make you better or worse or not usable for a helm?

DD: yes very much so!

DD: there is a psionic ranking system of course in terms of the amount of raw power available but also the type of psionics make a difference for example cerulean psychics and indigos are not functional for ship powering at all and varieties among lowbloods that exhibit nonphysical properties such as clairvoyance are typically not high enough on the actual kinetic energy production to be able to power a ship with any efficiency as conversion to a useable power source is often very inefficient and also takes up energy in the process which rather defeats the point

DD: for example telekinetic type psionics tend to be the most effective for helming while more psychically oriented powers are not

SA: sometimes hybridization allows multifaceted psionics but it's also very rare in natural occurance.

SA: i can pilot a starfighter with my telekinesis as long as the ship and my inhibitor are programmed to allow the link through.

Sa: But an entire ship wuld be beyond me.

SA; and for the most part starfighters rely on a psion's ability to generate shields and manipulate other variables for a quicker reactions time, but not flight itself.

DD: there are also augments that assist with that!

ID: hahahah okay can this be enough helms talk now.

ID: i've exceeded my comfort zone.

DD: that is part of what the psionic training facility that i am part of helps with-

DD: oh dear my apologies

DD: i will stop!

SA: 😃

ID: i mean i asked so it's fine.

ID: just. new convo now plzkthx.

ID: ...i mean i should volunteer a new subject huh.

ID: pris did you have dinner?

ID: both of you for that matter.

ID: miss hungry because i don't eat.

SA: ...

SA: maybe.

ID: =>:I the ice cream you had earlier isn't dinner btw.

SA: i had a fruit salad.

DD: dinner??

DD: ...

DD: oh dear

DD: i am afraid i lost track of time

DD: i was going to say i did have dinner but that feels as though it was a long time ago and it occurs to me that that may have been dinner yesternight and it is possible that part of my discomfort with my health is because i am actually very hungry

ID: i'm gonna make you both set alarms to eat. =>:(

ID: a fruit salad and ice cream isn't enough for a night pris.

SA: mrmrm.

SA: I'll be back in a bit.

ID: if you get lonely while eating call sips' mobile and i'll steal it to vid chat. =:P

SA: well I may as well call it now then.

SA: i am.

SA: go find it.

ID: woofbesat, fetch. i see how it is. =:PPP

DD: i unfortunately tend to not notice my alarms it has been somewhat detrimental my friend used to ahve somebody come pull me away from my work and i thought it was sillybut now i am realizing it was probably very necessary

ID: get one of those bracelets that vibrate as an alarm.

ID: they might work better.

DD: but also that is my cue to go find food before i keel over and die so goodbye it was lovely talking to you and also that is a good idea i should find one of those

ID: ...damnit now the chat is empty again. =>:(

VC: Not quite.

VC: I'm taking a rrest on a courrierr trip, what's everryone else up to?

ID: uh i sent all the hungry skeletons off to eat because they all forget or think that a fruit salad is a meal.

ID: so they're doing that. and i'm just sitting here twiddling ym thumbs and watching pris eat on vid-chat on another mobile.

ID: ....is it rude to text someone while watching another troll in a vid chat.

SA: i'm talking.

SA: asshole.

SA: that. that wasn't serious

VC: Oh, I don't think I've met you before, SA.

SA: Hello.

SA: I am prisma.

ID: =:P i can multitask pris!

VC: I'm Cennef. And you and Hadean apparently know each other well, I take it?

ID: yeah we're buds.

ID: pris is cool, so be nice to him. =:P

SA: cennef. it's nice to meet you.

VC: He's yellow, what reason do I have to _not_ be civil?

VC: It's not like he's one of this room's silly highbloods.

VC: You seem well-mannerrred, so I agrree in turrn.

ID: he can speak kinda highblood-y sometimes but it was just how he was raised so don't pick on him. =:P

VC: Mannerrs and phrrassing of some things isn't an exclusive highblood trrait. I harrdly would.

VC: Pherrres talks like he's trrrying to sound cerrulean sometimes and that doesn't botherr me.

ID: i mean glad you understand that. some lowbloods get so offended when you use a 'highblood' term!

ID: like saying tub is gonna turn you blue.

VC: Ha. I may not carre forr highbloods, but - oh _rreally_

VC: Using theirr language isn't exactly a sin.

VC: That's rridiculous.

ID: you've never met a lowblood who got all snooty with you over it?

ID: the 'uhm, did you mean ABLUTION TRAP?' types?

VC: I suppose I have now that I think of it, but they arren't exactly trrolls I spent a lot of time arround.

VC: My ex quads werren't like that at all, norr arre any of my currrent frriends.

ID: wise move. there's having a grudge against highbloods and then there's overcull.

VC: I rreally only have a grrrudge against _one_ highblood, but I do lack fondness forr them in generral.

SA: i overcull teal bloods.

VC: Though perrhaps it might be prrrudent to stop talking about it in case any of them do come in.

SA: they have always patronized me.

SA: 😉

VC: Pfft, what

VC: I know you'rre joking, but I don't rreally get it

ID: hahah, it's a chat thing. we joke that teals are the worst because they're in the middle so they lash out more.

VC: Ohhhh

VC: To be honest, I have only met one tealblood outside of deliverries, which don't rreally count.

VC: He was...verrry odd.

ID: that's a tealblood for you.

VC: Well, he wasn't a lawtroll orr anything. He was some sorrt of perrforrmer.

ID: ...huh. was it the dumpster troll.

ID: ...do you know what i'm talking about. probably not.

VC: ...he cerrtainly _belonged_ in a dumpsterr but otherrwise no, I do not.

VC: Mine talked like some sorrt of flowerrry idiot and called himself barrd.

VC: Is that what this dumpsterr trroll did.

ID: yes!

VC: Oh my god.

SA: why is there a known dumpster dweller.

ID: he got ceruleans mad about historical bulge piercings.

SA; what dessert should I get?

VC: _Oh my god._

ID: and they threw him in a dumpster.

ID: ...the fluffy one.

VC: For once. I am on the bluebloods' side.

VC: _What is wrong with him._

VC: Correction.

VC: How many things arrre wrrong with him.

ID: and then he started dueling them in the dumpster.

VC: Though I'd probably be -

VC: _Highbloods._

ID: until someone came and rescued his hide.

ID: it was hilarious.

VC: That's completely rrridiculous.

ID: it was. but that made it hilarious.

ID: so what are you delivering...?

VC: Sorry, I was getting back on the road. I have my phone on talk-to-text now. It's some sorrrt of book collection for this olive.

ID: you're fine. how are you traveling? and that sounds. boring.

VC: Haha, I have no clue. They could be about stunning adventurrres, for all I know. I don't usually get told the details of what I deliverrr, unless they'rre imporrtant forr trransit.

VC: I rrride my lusus.

VC: She's not exactly a hoofbeast orr anything, but she can go at a decent pace with a trroll as small as I am.

ID: heyy a troll after my own pumper. though my lusus is a variety of hoofbeast.

VC: Ohh, what kind?

ID: antelope kind. but one of the big ones. he can carry me and my stuff no problem. and we have similar rocking racks.

VC: Pfft. Do you now.

VC: I have decently sized horns myself.

ID: about time. like this chat is mostly nubhorn central.

VC: I can prrrove I am not nubhorned.

VC: Ignorre the goofy exprression, this is just what I had on frrond. Also unforrrtunately I should pay attention to the terrrain now, it's getting rrough.

ID: huh. sorry i've not got an image right on hand to share. and i'm not in the prettiest shape for selfies, so you'll just have to take me at my word. =:P

VC: Haha

VC: Well I fully expect one laterrr

VC: But underrstandable - ow

VC: I rreally _should_ stop talking, dammit

ID: your lusus bad at navigating?

SA: the fluffy one

SA: that didn't tell me anything...

ID: point the camera at the menu for me.

SA: there...

ID: uhhh. the lemon tart thingy. since you said you like citrus.

SA: okay.

SA: delicious...

ID: you're welcome. =:P

[exactlywhoyouthinkiwas-blog]

[2/27/2015 6:53:38 PM] Evan: so... [2/27/2015 6:53:39 PM] Evan: sup [2/27/2015 6:57:27 PM] YV??~: Nothing I guess. I stopped working like 2 something hours ago. mostly because a lot of these answers required too much thinking for me to concentrate on it. [2/27/2015 6:57:53 PM] Evan: haha sorry [2/27/2015 6:59:00 PM] YV??~: weh, its fine. [2/27/2015 7:00:17 PM] YV??~: i guess i should ask the same out of courtesy [2/27/2015 7:01:03 PM] Evan: The answer would be pretty similar. Not doin a whole lot at this moment in time. Jus the usual procrastinating while I should be doing Update. [2/27/2015 7:02:27 PM] Evan: How are things going for you? [2/27/2015 7:03:55 PM] YV??~: pretty much the same as last month but with 99% less anyone. exactly the same stuff just theres no one it is only me. i am the one.... who will never get any work done [2/27/2015 7:05:23 PM] YV??~: you? [2/27/2015 7:06:20 PM] Evan: Eh, not the greatest, but it's whatever. [2/27/2015 7:06:28 PM] Evan: How are you liking the silence? [2/27/2015 7:08:04 PM] YV??~: i dont know. i think its kinda annoying that people will say things about how important I am when literally no one talks to me and i just spend most of the time alone. *shrugshrug* [2/27/2015 7:08:24 PM] Evan: Ah. [2/27/2015 7:10:57 PM] Evan: I think a lot of them aren't great at socializing, to be honest. I'm pretty much the same. It's always hard to approach people you don't necessarily know that well since you don't know how they'll feel about it. [2/27/2015 7:11:10 PM | Edited 7:11:18 PM] Evan: I'd guess they're afraid they'd be bothering you? [2/27/2015 7:12:34 PM] YV??~: weh...hell if i fuckin know whats up with people. [2/27/2015 7:13:00 PM] Evan: Yeah. heh [2/27/2015 7:13:36 PM] Evan: It's been pretty slow in the main group lately, though. It seems like most people have split off into smaller, separate groups of people they're more comfortable with. [2/27/2015 7:14:09 PM] YV??~: good for them i guess [2/27/2015 7:14:54 PM] Evan: Indeed. [2/27/2015 7:15:23 PM] Evan: I just kind of wonder if there's anyone you'd still care to hang out with or if you're done with the entire community [2/27/2015 7:17:15 PM] YV??~: Weh, i didnt really come away hating anyone but im wary of jumping back into any space with most of these people lest they say things that make me end up hating my other series as well. [2/27/2015 7:17:57 PM] Evan: Are there just a few people in particular? I know there weren't THAT many involved in that particular conversation. [2/27/2015 7:21:24 PM] YV??~: eh, really anything one person can do the other can do just the same. Its either never talk openly about my work again or never people. I really dont think it would be possible for me to put a gag on all work related statements, so its easier to just forego people altogether [2/27/2015 7:22:37 PM] Evan: I don't think it would be a problem, though. It had been nearly a year before that happened, and it was a very specific situation. [2/27/2015 7:23:04 PM] Evan: Even though they misunderstood you and ended up hurting in the end, they had good intentions. [2/27/2015 7:26:31 PM] Evan: No one can predict things like that happening, but is it worth isolating yourself in case something like that happens again? I don't mean to sound pushy, but I'm kind of worried about you. [2/27/2015 7:30:41 PM] YV??~: Yeah but it ultimately is better i take cautions side. because I dont know, Ive always been alone with minimal friends and I was never 1st choice for any of them. Ive never really gotten angry of fought with people besides my siblings and considering my sister once choked me in my sleep for snoring and i could have actually killed her at one point in some fight, i think that hints at what kind of destructive anger i tend to get. While now i try to point it towards me so as not to harm others something still ends up broken or destroyed. usually art of some kind. [2/27/2015 7:34:28 PM] YV??~: im not saying thats not a nice sentiment but i guess i just wasnt made to be around  people [2/27/2015 7:35:21 PM] Evan: I don't think that's the case at all. [2/27/2015 7:38:38 PM] Evan: For all the time I've been around you, I haven't seen you hit anyone especially hard. You tend to be blunt about things, but I don't think you've hurt anyone. Even when you left the chat was relatively tame during the actual interaction. What's more troubling is you hurting yourself, and I feel like that's primarily what's being accomplished right now. [2/27/2015 7:39:03 PM] Evan: I know I've said this before and you seem to not like it, but you aren't as bad as you think. You still deserve to be happy. [2/27/2015 7:43:56 PM] YV??~: Eh, at this point im used to it. I mean i only ever get people being nice to me and complementing me and id otherwise have nothing to keep them in check or balance them out if i didnt turn the abuse up to 400 on myself. *shrugshrugshrug* [2/27/2015 7:45:07 PM] Evan: Then let me be harsh for a second. [2/27/2015 7:45:09 PM] Evan: That's stupid. [2/27/2015 7:48:11 PM] Evan: People are nice to you because they think you deserve it. No matter how terrible you think you might be on the inside, it's what you project that determines who you are. If you never act on your terrible thoughts, then how can you be considered bad? Even if you have things to work on - as everyone does - you aren't going to make it any easier by hating yourself. [2/27/2015 7:52:18 PM] YV??~: Weh, I mean ultimately i doubt anyone even wants to talk to me anyway. [2/27/2015 7:52:36 PM] Evan: I've been talking to you for the last four hours. [2/27/2015 7:53:44 PM] YV??~: closer to 4 and a half but yes i noticed [2/27/2015 7:54:14 PM] Evan: And I think you're a very unique person with an interesting perspective. [2/27/2015 7:54:45 PM] Evan: Others may not have gotten to know you that well, but I think they'd absolutely want to talk to you as they did. [2/27/2015 7:58:43 PM] YV??~: Well, I mean thats all based on other peoples opinion but i dont think many people get to interested with people who ramble for much too long on one thing. [2/27/2015 7:59:06 PM] Evan: Is that a thing you do? I haven't noticed it. [2/27/2015 8:03:11 PM] YV??~: Well I decided to answer questions that could be a short to the point answer with a paragraph. But there comes a point where, when you frequently find yourself gasping for air in the middle of a word, you begin to question whether you let other people get a word in on something youre interested in, or if its just you talking to yourself. [2/27/2015 8:04:49 PM] Evan: haha [2/27/2015 8:05:14 PM] Evan: I don't think it's as bad as you think it is. Cause there are some people that have it bad, but I've never known you to be one of them. [2/27/2015 8:05:46 PM] Evan: If anything it seems like you didn't talk much at all during the interactions we've had. [2/27/2015 8:06:45 PM] YV??~: I try not to. I usually dont have anything worthwhile to say anyway [2/27/2015 8:07:36 PM] Evan: But the point is I think you do just fine. You could have plenty of friends if you let yourself. [2/27/2015 8:10:53 PM] YV??~: i dont know. People tend not to listen to me even when i do have something to say. Even when i was a wee tot eager to be at school i only ever had one friend until 7th grade. [2/27/2015 8:23:22 PM] Evan: But people CAN'T listen if you don't talk to them. You don't have to make a bunch of friends. Hell, you don't have to make any. But you should be happy, and if being around other people contributes to that, it's absolutely worth doing. And if you play nice enough you might find some people that you really like. [2/27/2015 8:28:31 PM] Evan: And trust me, I know what it's like. [2/27/2015 8:29:32 PM] Evan: Until last year I never had anyone I considered to be a friend. There were people I talked to, and people I sometimes hung out with, but it never lasted more than a few months, or maybe the school year if they happened to be someone in class. [2/27/2015 8:30:25 PM] Evan: It took twenty years for me to make a friend, but it happened. If a social wreck like me can meet people and be happy, I think you have more than a chance. [2/27/2015 8:30:30 PM] Evan: :D [2/27/2015 8:35:49 PM] YV??~: eh. Im really tired of thinking whether or not to go back or whatever, and ive got too much stuff to get done this weekend to worry about it. [2/27/2015 8:36:40 PM] Evan: That's fine. [2/27/2015 8:38:42 PM] Evan: You don't even have to go back to that particular group. Hell, I'm not even in the main chat anymore. But you should go somewhere - find people to talk to and most importantly be happy. [2/27/2015 8:39:12 PM] Evan: Though you've spent a lot of time getting to know us fanime people. So it's certainly a good place to start. [2/27/2015 8:39:41 PM] Evan: I could also probably direct ya toward one of the smaller off-branch groups if that's more your cup. [2/27/2015 8:39:46 PM] Evan: But yeah, good luck with the things. [2/27/2015 8:42:57 PM] Evan: And I know it sounds generic as all hell, but [2/27/2015 8:43:16 PM] Evan: if you ever need to talk to someone - about ANYTHING - I'll be here.

[thestrugglezxcs-blog]

WEEK 13

It’s a new week again, pretty worried because we are still kinda stuck with no ideas and our progress is stagnant. Started off with explaining the candle idea to huei hoon on monday!

Huei’s Consultation

Can go a little deeper on what’s depression.

You all need a little more content in it.

(Root cause) You all explained what it is not but didn’t explain what it is.

Give reasons on why depression is different from sadness, how do you tell them apart.

Explanation largely ok. (for presentation)

Idea not very strong and not very original

The connections inside need to be stronger

Needs to be very real

Not unusual enough

Not strong enough to make a strong communication project

Why candle? what does it represent?

Small flame= little energy

Flame= hope, cannot see the future is bright

People will assume if we don't explain our intention properly

Why hexagon?

Every shape, form u choose has a meaning

Use compressed foam board? Don’t use wood.

Sculpt the foam board then paint then wax on the surface

A little straightforward

How to make the person look in and see themselves in depression mode on the mirror?

Ended our morning consultation and we thought a little about the form so,

Reason why we used a hexagon is because because: people with depression tries their best to meet the requirements of those without. So with all these negative words, it shapes the depressed causing them to be affected, being unable to reach these goals, hence close to breaking down.

In the afternoon, we had another consultation with Huei,

Hot glue more durable than wax

Hollow

Calculate how many boxes you all need

Whole thing doesnt need to be wax

So it can be lighter.

Pendant put on the wax.

AAAAHHHH more to go!!!! Jiayou us. Luke didn’t have any lessons on Tuesday so it was pure consultation!

Luke’s consultation

Do something that people think is normal, but when depression people look at it, it doesnt feel normal to them.Thus make them go forward.

Differentiate normal people and mental illness

Can play with optical illusion

Take a big panel and make it look 3d, outline it with luminous light

So when they look in will be second third plane.

Something to show there’s a “hole” inside

During Alfred’s lesson, we learnt to use Adobe Animate although Joy has learnt it before, she’s still slightly struggling with it’s coding and Xin Yi is also trying hard learning it.

We consulted Alfred after and these are what he said:

Make a smaller hole, if not everyone can see everything inside from far.

How are you gonna show a static fake flame?

Try to light a candle and see the flame and melted wax

Observe how the wax forms and how much wax there is.

If you want to make a candle shape, make it look legit

Now it looks like scooby doo ghost.

How to make the wax?

Symbol of candle?

Sign of ending life?

It is not a sign of strength

Need a stronger symbolism

Do a form that is so normal that we will not take a second look

Candle- lifespan

Bubble wrap- security

Where’s the empathy?

Where’s the call to action?

Didn’t really follow your objective

Where’s the part that’s gonna be fatal if left untreated?

How do you show depression if left untreated it becomes fatal?

Something thats ordinary, plain,

Requires a kind of like timer- at the end of this if somethings is not done then POOF

HOW IS THAT EMPATHY when u just look inside?

Not addressing empathy and show consequence.

Address objective or change it.

Fatal or empathy?

Felt really lost after consultation with Alfred...because we are drifting far away from our objective omg.

So we have to keep reminding ourselves of our objective!!!!!

To help people empathise and overcome depression; if left untreated it becomes fatal.

we thought of a few ideas on how we could reach the objective

1. Using back the idea of a never ending tunnel, we replace the words or quotes with daily diary entries of real people with depression till the last suicidal diary entry.

2. Combining the images with words together. Taking inspiration from Olivia Penpraze’s video documentation on her journey with depression till suicide.

3. Taking inspiration from here https://www.blurtitout.org/2012/07/02/diary-of-depression/ Images attatched to each diary entry shows his exterior normality going through depression. But his diary entries write things like:

4. Exterior: A diary that shows a fine person

5. “diary” on a stand. Users read the diary till the end to see a hole in the diary. Users then peek in to see the never ending book

6. Is it possible to use projectors instead of a never ending tunnel

So previously we screwed up our interim, and we met Huei on Wednesday for some feedback for it.

Experimentation started late, so not much development

3 areas we need improve: deck and presentation, development

Have to allow the exterior lecturer to understand better. Using the deck and the way we present. Need facts and figures to allow the listener to understand and see how we used our insights to get our objective and how we ideates.

It’s all about communication. It’s a deliverable part of a campaign.be effective to the client

Not enough testing to show that it’s an experimental project: techniques and concept

Dont throw in the whole paragraph into the slides, use keywords

Explain why we used people without depression

3 CONCEPTS: throw in sketches because they under process

Experimental not enough cos only got 1?

Experimentation hard to make out what we tryna achieve

Experimentation: how much light we need? Bright or dim? Placement of lights?

Incorporate points of research with survey

Planning is impt when planning slides.

What can i do if i think my neighbour have depression?

Photography is techniques?

How you know people will walk up to it?

Concept not super persuasive yet, and it’s a very normal idea

Try to incorporate interesting use of media: can it be something different? But it’s smth different?

Can it enable modern technology? Smth more interesting?

Interactive part depends on what the client wants to achieve, which is the user’s take away.

Can check out exhibition at STPI

Landing site connected to QR code of people telling their stories or those relatives telling their stories (realistic)

On that same day, we felt very behind time and we consulted David on our very little progress:

Diary idea,

Going inside - who will read

Too wordy

Visually passive

No shocking element, feels very far

They won’t feel scared

Need element that makes it scary

self -pity moment

They dont want self-pity from a stranger, but they rather tell you things, because they are close to you

They are fearful that you will look into their inside

They are not as opened to strangers: there is a layer of “don’t come and touch me”

Notes hidden by a weariness to share.

Selective sharing

Users should feel like they have intruded somebody’s privacy

Feels like they doing something wrong but they feel wow

Eg: go inside, full of eyes, what do you feel? Watchful of disclosing secrets. Sublime

Weary eyes, with small notes beside it (consider the ring-jap)

Sublime then makes them want to look on.

Hidden notes, secrets (scarce)

Curiosity kills the cat cfm will look in

“I dont rly disclose my depression to other”

If it’s plain? Expressionless? Eyes outside but closed?

Two eyelids - peaceful

Makes them want to question themselves

Sound - crying/talk

Interaction is visual

Secrets hidden very well. Explore with people sticking their head in.

Outside looks peaceful and normal, but the shocking thing is that we all didn’t know that they have depression.

So the depression images will be the background.

One line of the notes can do

Some disclose some “dw to let u know”

So how is this depression?

Maybe it could be a note “they won’t really tell you, till you are willing to be understanding”

But people may look at your notes first before they put their head in

How obvious shld the notes be?

Could be white post its around so they look like scales

Don’t do eyes for exterior so there can be the element of surprise

If it’s a pendant, how will they know that they can take it?

Put inside hole?

Or smth like a cocoon

Eyebags? Put the giveaway inside?

Connection between the whole thing is most important

WE HAVE HOPE AGAIN!!!!!! So excited to carry on after hearing what David said!!! And we came up with a list of stuff we can do for now.

Areas for experimentations:

test a wall of eyes, how will people react

Those with depression and how they will react differently with friends and strangers

Best way to create the most realistic and weary eyes

Best way to create a pendant: hot glue? Resin? Plastic? Shape?

More on photography, show more experiments of techniques

Test sounds on people

MIRRRRORRRR

If people will stick their heads in

Shape?

Butterfly? To represent freedom, taking a butterfly token home represents taking a baggage off?

Teardrop? To represent the tears they have shed will not be taken as a call for attention? Can put in eyebags also

Drug? Pills? Addition to the want to kill themselves?

Heart?

Bones?

Gun bullets?

Lego brick? Or puzzle? Part and parcel of their depression journey?

What if it’s a drug capsule? If the user throws it into the water the capsule dissolves, a note comes out or a message comes out?

EXTERIOR

Sheer cloth over the 2 eyes

Still hexagon?

Cylinder?

Plain w two eyes and eyebags

If teardrop, hang on eyelash?

BIGGG EYE WITH EYELASH

Peace sign twistttt

The exterior with the net

SOUND

Nobody understands me

Why are you looking at me like that?

Dont ask me anything

Im not telling u anything

Ahhh im fine dont worry

Just leave me alone

GET OUT OF HERE

*cries* why am i such a burden

Im so unworthy for anyone

The world would be much better without me

Some of what they are really thinking and some of them saying stuff they pushes people away

Went to check out STPI on Thursday!

Didn’t really get much inspiration, but it’s okay!

TGIF!! it’s another day of consultation

DAVID’S CONSULTATION

What do you want to achieve of your experiment?

Social experiment of eyes- the location determine the results

Can see from afar or out of a sudden?

Put in toilet?

Alternatives,

Individual or a group of people

Designers-right brain

Engineers-left brain

Test people of different schools

Exterior, need something to pull it etc to create the form we want

Mosquito net- drapes down but we need something to pin down

It won't flow by itself

What does the teardrop and her means?

Looks very sweet

Have u experiment if 1m is a good size?

Closed eyes- fine but like having anxiety, sweating

Remove her sweat, CTA (pendant)

Flowchart like how we will react or how others will react, if they walk away, will they get the message?

If flow chart has a lot of “walk away” then you have to change the thing that connects to the “walk away”.

What if you make the eyes outside open and close slowly

Need to have a spotlight since our artefact is being draped

Echo and reverberations are diff

Reverberations are like sounds you make in the toilet. The sounds bounce against the walls

Read up or listen to reverberations, sounds similar to echo, but it’s the bouncing actions that makes you feel like there’s echo

Heartbreak hotel song by elvis Presley. The echo feels very near, the sounds bounces a lot.

Experiment 1: We printed many eyes and stick them behind toilet doors to see people’s reaction mainly people from SD

we’ve got quite good response! Most of them felt uncomfortable or scared (yes! Our objectives). Only 3 out of 15 thought it was pretty funny because it was in SD, it’s not a rare sight to see weird things.. hmm maybe it’s time to change some locations.

So things we need to do this coming week:

Sound

weekly reflections

consultation sheets

form with stockings

resin pendant

Best way to create the most realistic and weary 3D eyes

test audio with underpass

more testings on the eyes (guys)

hot glue pendant

test if people will stick their heads in a hole

Glad we didn’t give up and were able to think of ideas together as a team. There’s not much time left, let’s hope we can finish experimenting by this week and start building it by the following week!