#also i didn't know what to name this womp

[marzipanandminutiae]

This is maybe a silly question, but how does a dance card work? I hear about them but I don't really know what they are or do.

Basically, during the 19th-mid 20th centuries, women might have one at a ball with a little pencil (usually given as party favors). Thus:

Dance card from a ball on January 11, 1887.

Before dancing started, men would approach women and ask for this or that dance with them. Women could refuse, but would then have to sit that dance out entirely so as not to appear rude- rejecting one man and then accepting another was seen as impolite. The general rule was to accept your first offer, in part because dancing didn't always imply romance. It was a social activity, and you were supposed to be a good sport and spread yourself around, so to speak. Men weren't exempt from this, either- asking ladies for as many of the dances as possible was considered good manners, for the same reason.

once one had a partner committed for a given dance, one would write his name on one's dance card. this was as much to create a memento as to jog one's memory later, it seems to me. you could also be asked to dance immediately before a dance started and write the name of your partner in afterwards; see above re: memento creation

and that's basically it

(men usually just had to remember with whom they had claimed each dance. womp womp.)

[lizzaneia-elizalde]

Yandere! closed off! ex/boyfriend x gn! lover! reader

Ughhh I tried doing angst but failed womp womp.

As you can see, this fic is more or less fantastical, but I tried to do realism, as much as realistic a yandere fic could be.

But I failed LOL I don't know how to write angst. I tried tho.

This one is inspired by an imagine that I saw on tiktok, that's also apparently stolen? I dunno.

I think this is my longest fic so far?

Yandere! boyfriend name: Lee

TW: Unaffectionate boyfriend, neglect, love bombing

Lee was a man of few words. He never liked showing emotions, nor affection.

He didn't grow up in a family of loving members. Only people who did the bare minimum in affection, and poured their "love" in giving him gifts.

Fortunately, he didn't grow up a materialistic and greedy man.

Well, he wished he was.

At least he still has something to fill his heart with, something to be wanting of.

All he got from that kind of upbringing is dampened emotions that pushed his friends away. If he had anyone to begin with.

He's one lonely man.

So Lee did what he thinks is the best for himself. And it's to be selfish.

If someone tried to get close with him, he pushes them off first before he becomes attached. When his family tried to be loving, he cringes and shies away with the most disgusted face ever. He shielded his heart at such a young age.

And it had tall repercussions because of it.

Now, that he's an adult and in University, with that selfish mindset out of the way due to maturing, he just realized he doesn't know how to connect anymore.

But he's a handsome man, so finding someone was easy for him.

In an "eenie, minie, mo" type of choosing, he chose you, a starry eyed, affectionate, and optimistic person. Someone who adored Lee, and wished to be his friend, maybe more.

Why? You always ask yourself that too.

But that magnetic pull meant that you became his, and him became yours.

He was stoic with it, just asking you straight up to be his lover without any emotions. And you, overwhelmed with happiness, just said yes without noticing how frigid he looks with it.

Being with Lee was fun at first, well, that's what you tell yourself.

You showered him with affection, kissing him, hugging him, holding his hands... You tried everything to give him the affection he never had.

I mean, he always receives it well, right?

So it means it was okay... Right?

But as weeks passed, he never returned the affection, only a cold recognition with his eyes and a grunt, maybe a shoulder shrug. The occasional side hug was even more than enough for you. Then there's the rare kiss (on the forehead) that you relished on.

It was the bare fucking minimum.

And as pitiful as it sounds, you were satisfied with it.

Are you really satisfied with it?

You wanted that same amount of affection back, or less. You just wanted a fair two way relationship goddamnit!

It's like Lee was a void, just sucking your affection and not returning it.

You understood him. Really you did!

But the way he was so unbothered and annoyed by your simple suggestions of maybe doing more than he does is breaking your already broken heart.

You were gaslighting yourself, thinking that why are you asking Lee for so much when he can't give affection a normal human can? Why are you pushing him to do something he can't? Why are you being so needy and clingy?

Why are you so desperate?

Lee was not having it either. He was always so annoyed whenever you ask for hugs, kisses, dates...

What does he really want from this relationship?

As you wept your heart out for hurting for the wrong man, you steeled it and decided to do the inevitable.

You dragged Lee to the beach for a little get together.

You wanted to see if he would remember that it's your anniversary today.

"Lee! Come on! I want to swim!" You enthusiastically said, running to the sand and giggling at how the sand tickles your soles.

As usual, Lee only scoffs and annoyingly shrugged off his backpack onto the blanket.

"I told you I'm busy." Lee muttered, annoyance riddled his face.

Lee didn't even flinch when he lied smoothly. He wasn't busy at all.

Was it really a hassle to spend time with you? In your anniversary, no less?

You cleared your throat before smiling once more, a whisper of broken unspoken promises lingering in your mind and heart shattered completely.

Maybe you could salvage it?

You approached Lee and gave him a sunscreen. He grabbed it with an exasperated sigh.

"Turn around." He seethed.

Somehow, you think this was a bad idea but you persevered and turned around.

He was harsh with it, slapping and rubbing your back like he was doing such an annoying task with a heavy heart and hand. You winced every time he digs the heel of his palm to your back, like he's delivering a message.

Why can't you leave him alone?

"I think that's enough!" You said with a happy edge on your tone, trying not to show that you were hurt physically and emotionally by what he's doing. You skipped to the waters, going underwater and letting out your tears.

The saltwater stung your eyes heavily, but it hurts less than what Lee's doing to you.

After letting out your frustrations into swimming, you decided you had enough.

With a heavy heart, you trudged towards him with a solemn look in your face.

Lee, who was just scrolling through his phone, heard you out with an angry look on his face when you called his name.

Yet, it slowly fell to obscurity, his body felt numb.

You told him how hurt you were, how him not showing affection and being constantly annoyed at you squeezed your heart until it popped, only leaving a pile of hurt.

"Lee, I love you so much that it hurts. I feel so horrible whenever I ask you to return the affection I give you because I know that you're not affectionate!" You wheezed out, your voice hoarse from all the pain bubbling over your throat, vomiting words you meant and never meant, but all was for Lee. "Was I only with you for you to absorb everything? Be satisfied with you just standing there idly, and returning the affection only in the bare fucking minimum?! Answer me!"

Your eyes search desperately for a sign of regret, a sign of guilt, but nothing.

His eyes showed nothing.

"Are you done? Then it's over then."

It was your turn to be numb, your knees weak as you slumped down, with Lee standing up. He grabbed his bag and left, not even looking back at your weeping form.

Happy anniversary, and sorry for your breakup.

Lee felt free.

Finally.

After a year of tolerating your "clingy" self, he finally felt free.

Lee regretted being in a relationship. He thought that maybe, when he gets with someone, he finally won't feel lonely anymore.

But being with you suffocated him, and everything you did was annoying him to shit.

Did he feel bad?

Eh....

Weeks passed, and when he pass by you in the hallways, trying to talk to him for closure, he just ignores you like a breeze.

People looked at him like he's the most cruel person on earth but he just shrugs it off. So what?

Lee felt awkward though, so he avoided you at all costs until he thinks it's the right time to talk with you.

And when it was finally time, he saw you with an another man, making you happy and making you smile.

The man brought his fingers on the corner of your lips and turned it upwards, and he smiled brightly also as you rolled your eyes and laughed at him.

Didn't you love him? So what's this?

Lee clearly remembers you crying for him in such a heartbreaking state.

He scoffed with such disbelief and looked away.

Then, he felt his heart hurt. His eyes widened.

No fucking way.

Now, every time he pass by you, his heart hurts and his head fills with anger as he saw you become happy with the company of others.

Why were you happy with them? Weren't he your ultimate happiness?

Why are you laughing with them? Why not him?

His desperation for you to look his way, to give him your sorrowful eyes, to give him affection that is only rightfully his, is getting into his head.

Rumors of you dating again got to him one day when he was sitting on his seat in Physics class, wallowing in anger and desperation.

You moved on? Just like that?

He gripped his pen and broke it in half.

"No! Lee let go of me!"

"I love you so much y/n please come back to me!"

"You're insane!"

"No! I'm not! Can you see? I'm being affectionate now! So please love me again!"

"No! Please! Let me go! I will not tell the authorities that you killed [redacted] and kidnapped me!"

"DON'T FUCKING SAY HIS NAME!"

"LOOK AT ME!"

"Only look at me, and say my name."

"You love me right? I love you too. There's no need for you to be shy now."

"Shy?! But all I wa--"

"Quiet! You're not going to be away from me. Not anymore. I was stupid enough to let you go, now you're not going anywhere."

"Mmf?!"

"Shh... The gag is necessary. Now, please, love me again, baby."

"Please."

"I'm desperate."

[jazeswhbhaven]

Just Another Day in Hades...(Requiem of the Survivors Event React III)

Henlo again, third post time! Make sure you check out the previous parts before continuing! ->Part 1 -> ->Part 2->

Good to go? Let's finish this~

So we're back and this is final part to my react post!! It's mostly the damn image limit that kills me. Let me have 50 images per post ugh. Anywayssss

WOMP I spelt his name wrong in another post like all the way wrong. It's bad enough Orias couldn't even remember his name lmao

I'm crying because level with me... I read his name because of the typo as "Zaddy" instead of Zadkie Sure. I mean I'll call him Zaddy ᕕ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )ᕗ (btw this is a different way of calling someone "Daddy" during sex) Now you know your admin was being horny for another angel again. I am never leaving the streets at this point and Dre has his eyes on me ready to have some words. m o v i n g o n n nn

So Orias is hyping up the angel trying to get him ready for when leviathan gets over to him. they see him from afar and have their little talk, and Zadkiel is nervous asf (as he should be) but Orias is like "you're fine :D" all while he's over there slobbering over Levi's soul again.

See. Look at him. Just confident. Also this part I'm just gonna hurry up and paraphrase so "Levi" walks up to Orias and the angel and after the two of them stare at each other BAM Orias tells the angels to attack "Levi" immediately.

Looks like they got him right???

W R O N G

After Orias ripped through "Levi's" chest and ate the orb, it didn't taste at all what he expected, and...it had the opposite affect of what he thought it would too.

Won't you look at that, Orias wasn't the only one who fucking came in with a failsafe key sort of speak. SO remember back when I said Zadkiel was staring at Levi??? Well he knew who it was because it wasn't really Levi at all but an old colleague of his named Ose that was disguised by the real Levi who only half trusted Orias's note. And as I suspected, Levi was too smart for that and if we remember that he and orias are the ones that can lie. so both parties threw everyone for a loop.

Leviathan played his cards right and he won. Foras witnessed such a thing before his eyes knowing he was probs gonna win anyway lol

And omfg how cheeky, Levi also just wanted to know what would happen if Orias swallowed the soul omg. Lol this is wild. So in short honestly, Zadkiel gave up, seems that he was under Gabriel since he said his name as his last words and the Leviathan monster pretty much swallowed everyone up. It nearly goes for Orias but Levi stops it.

Yes, even after all this bullshit, Levi sticks to his original promise that he wasn't going to do anything to Orias. In fact, he even has the monster spit out a few souls for Orias to eat.

Now see here, this whole "omg being over 21 means your so old now wow" joke is tiring because no one in their 20s looks like Orias who I assume looks like a wrinkled fucking peach under there and his hair is kinda greyed out too? which I mean I've heard of that happening but come on. lol

otherwise though it comes to a conclusion that Orias was pissed off that he was tricked even though he's the one that tricked Levi in the first place

I can't either Foras. I really can't. Orias needs the timeout chair if he's gonna act like this because omg it's almost like Levi is gentle parenting him so he can act better but I mean technically none of this is a good example of gentle parenting lol But also, Orias has a new noose on his neck and if I'm reading the room correctly, I think Levi intends on using it in it future because of how he says "your life belongs to me" and that it's not like the old one.

Orias is on a tight leash now, Levi's promise still hasn't changed, and our nobles learned more about him and us too.

CONCLUSION So for this event I give it a 9/10. One point off because Orias is being a little brat which kinda came off to me as in his big age, he was still acting like a child. Like yes, give him some grace because he was at that farm with Levi and had horrible stuff done to him and especially one that causes aging to where he may even die in another year or so and he's addicted to angel souls now and it makes him want more and more. I'm pretty sure I'm forgetting to highlight something...but I'mma be honest I'm running off fumes and I haven't slept at all SO if I do remember I'll just edit it in here. But but I hope you all enjoyed the heavy lore again, I really appreciate this that they're doing for the story because it's starting to kind of align with the main story kindish? And we get to see glimpses of how the devils are without MC around so I'm getting my piece of slice of life demon pie.

NOW though with the event done. I'm sure the next one crossing my fingers will be a Lucifer-centered one. maybe. Because they have told us before chapter updates would be every three months or so so that's a lot of waiting that I'm glad for because that means more time to beef up cards, unlock holy board stories, farm for materials. The best time for a f2p peep. btw these advanced candies are gonna fucking be the end of me, it's almost like I need to ONLY nab those during events because they get you at the end with those.

As always appreciate you all for reading my stuff, after I sleep today I'll get back to work on those requests again T^T byeee~ -your lovely admin ♥( ˆ⌣ ˆԅ)

[xshiny]

König x gn!reader prt 3

Imma pretend that the Weimar Constitution didn't happen on August 14, 1919...it's a fan fiction, what can i say 🤷‍♀️.

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

When you turn, you see a whole ass 6'10 giant man walking your way- but he's wearing traditional German royal clothes. Could this bear for a man possibly be your long lost spouse from childhood? I mean...the hood he was wearing over his face was familiar...

You didn't notice you were staring until Horangi nudge you. He gives you a smirk, but also gestures to the man who is now standing in front of us. He gives you an encouraging thumbs up to greet him.

Turning back to face the man, you stammer, unsure of what to say or how to react. Were you supposed to curtsy/bow? Did you have to get in one knee and kiss his knuckles? Should you put your hand out for a handshake? Instead, the man just chuckles at you, seeing how you fumbled with in greeting him.

"Y/n...it's been so long since I last saw you" the man speaks, and bows. You quickly bow/curtsy back. "Meine Liebe...Surely you remember me, no?" The man asks, his German accent slipping through. He takes his hooded mask off, revealing his handsome face.

Those eyes...the hair, am even the smile was still the same as you remembered it was, twenty years ago. You don't realize you were crying until the man reaches forward and wipes it away.

"Schatz...why are you crying?" He asks, and you lean into his touch. Yes. This was your long lost spouse from childhood.

"König..." you croak out, same reach up to his hands, feeling how calloused and rough they were, yet how soft and warm they held you. You haven't spoken his name since the day he left till now. "It's really you"

"Ja, das bin ich wirklich" König speaks, and pulls you in for an embrace. "I'm here, Meine Libeling"

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

A/n: Imma put this here so I can brainstorm some more 😃👍

Anyway, yeah. Womp womp chomp chomp.

Translations:

"Meine Libeling" -> "my love"

"Schatz" -> "Darling"

"Ja, das bin ich wirklich" -> "Yes, it's really me"

Also, does anyone else know his real full name? Like I found a post About it but I can't find it...😭 Wasn't it something like Kilgore Alexander or something 🤔.

[c4fin4t3d-f1sh]

Day in the Life of Me... A Therian who has Given up on Caring. (But isn't a freak about it :])

Before school: I put on my tail on my back belt loop because fuck school bullies.

Period... TEST: We had state testing, womp womp. Had to write an essay about building a town monument. Nothing exciting.

Period 1 ELA: We literally had a test break the entire period. I ate salsa chips and kinda just scrolled on Pinterest.

Period 4 Science: Our school day was out of order because of testing lol. We got our rats which we have to dissect tomorrow. I was the only one super happy (I'm a taxidermy enthusiast) and named my rat Timothy. One kid barked at me, I don't really care.

Lunch: My friends started making fun of me and calling me a furry and screaming skibidi toilet shit at me.... I ate a PB&J, strawberries, lettuce, and a granola bar.

Period 2 ELA: We were reading for debate and just doing research.

Period 3 History: We learned about the temples in San Bartolo and about H. Hurst, who was the lady who started the San Bartolo excavation groups.

Period 6 Math: We played this weird game called Rollo, and also played a jeopardy about completely unrelated stuff. Pretty fun class today ngl.

Period 7 Studio Art: Just worked on my clay tic-tac-toe board. Made some of the custom pieces in the shapes of crescent moons.

Period 8 PE (This is where it gets funny): We didn't have to change today and had free choice (luckily) but two girls started barking at me and took pictures of me while I was turned around, which kinda ticked me off? I don't know, didn't matter for long. We had to at least run a lap, so everyone ran off to the track and some girls we're whispering about me behind my back then started barking and awoo-ing at me, which I quietly refrained myself from asking if they needed a treat. The rest of class was pretty chill except some kids tried throwing balls and frisbees at my head.

Well, that's my daily life as a therian. I don't do anything weird, I don't walk around on all fours, I don't shit in litter boxes (or the school bathrooms tbh). What a shocker.

[ms-moonlight-inn]

✨✨Weekly Tag Wednesday ✨✨

Look at this shit, it's me answering one of these on the actual day it was assigned. Magic! 🪄🔮

Tagged by @blue-disco-lights, @burninface, @energievie, @jrooc, & @mybrainismelted & @guinguin1984

Name: Burned out & waiting for summer AKA Cyn

Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego? (or you): That place that keeps promising the Northern lights, but it's always cloudy af here, so we never actually get to see them. last night was supposed to be a good light show... womp, womp... thunderstorms. 

Ok, so this week we are going to snoop into your google search. Type in each phrase and tell us what the first suggestion is that google gives you!

What is the best way to…. study. LOL! Ok, Google, thanks for the generic answers that only work for the few non-neurodivergent individuals in the room.

Where can I…. watch the Celtics game. Um, fuck no. Basketball sucks now, all the new rules have watered down the sport. Also, fuck the Celtics. I'm a die-hard Lakers fan.

How old is…. Joe Biden. There ya go. asked and answered.

How long does it take… to get to the moon. Just g'head and blame my son for this, and all astronomical questions, being permanently etched into our search history.

How many…  weeks in a year. It's moo, motherfucker, moo. Also, 52.

Who set the record for…. the highest jump (@blue-disco-lights, we're all getting this question?!) (it was Javier Sotomayor of Cuba btw)

When did…. WWII start.

 

What does it feel like to… get shot. (@blue-disco-lights Mickey must've hacked into my shit, as well.) Honestly, I'm sur[rised it didn't pop up with something crazier than this.

Can you… run it. And the sites associated with this search are IT/tech sites that tell you if you can run certain software on your machine.

When you… say nothing at all. And these two vids pop up side-by-side.

Same song, different versions. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Why do… I owe taxes this year. LOL! I don't.

Is there a way… to unsend an email. The very first response is an AI generated summary of shit we already know: depends or your email provider & how long ago you sent it. Yeah, so shit, Sherlock.

How old do you have to be… to work. Not even dignifying that shit with a response.  

Where do the… Florida Panthers play. Again with stupid sports questions. i bame wifey for this. (Also, @blue-disco-lights nice Warriors reference! 😉)

What is the best time to… post on Instagram. I really couldn't care less.  

And to finish us off…. What comes up when you type in Shameless? Oh, nothing. Nothing at all...

***

I do believe everyone's been tagged on this. If you haven't please feel free to join & give a tag back.

[batesmotelofficial]

comic con diaries

Norman bates edition

..

SOMEBODY SOLD A PIN

WITH MY BUISNESS ON IT

IM FAMOUS-

...

I had to let a little nerd with a blue box hold mother while I talked to somebody

I didn't agree with that

..

Ash Williams was there

He didn't know what was good

...

I also met papa emeritus 3

Thought he was dead

Womp womp

..

Got books

Cant read

..

Got a poster

I love it

It has a cat on it

..

And vhs tapes

I don't own a vhs player

..

Mother enjoyed it

I let her walk around for a while

(Aka she knocked me out in the bathroom and forcefully took over)

..

This random named the doctor almost got exterminated by a robot

Little nerd deserved it

..

And moon knight

I love moon knight.

[youredreamingofroo]

The Family Tree of Roo

Now that I've posted pretty much the entire family, here's the family tree :) I still have some characters to make, notably: Sean, Evan and Josey I'm thinking of doing Mateo and Noah, but I'm not sure... 🤔

Clarifications that weren't obvious (or were) that I wanted to make clear under the cut, as well as mentions of death, custody court cases, and just bad parenting. Also it gets long

And if you've looked at the tags in my pinned post, you'll notice a few new names not listed in the family tree or that haven't been mentioned in Roo's story, so to clarify: The Roo-seum's intent was to show off his story, while I could've (and should've) included stories like him going to Sweden for Deli, I didn't... and that's a me thing because I actually hadn't developed that much of the story at that point, but I still don't think I would've included it in the Roo-seum, because it's about him, and his story, and also he didn't even know his siblings that well, sure, I could've included Jordy in his story, but I didn't, womp womp.

Some other things to clarify, language and origins:

Virginia is Swedish, but lived in the US with her parents, so she does not know Swedish that well. Reese is not fully Swedish, but has Swedish blood, his blood has traces of DNA from all over the Scandinavia area, and Swedish is the highest presenting. Roo and Jordy are Swedish, Jordy, for whatever reason, does not look like her parents at all, and they still aren't sure why, a DNA test proved she was Swedish, and was their child. Devan and Deli are Swedish, Devan speaks primarily Swedish, and speaks broken English, relying on (previously) Roo and (now) Jordy, however he is very passionate about linguistics (as mentioned in his post), so he wants to learn about languages, learn new languages and become fluent in English. Deli is fluent in both Swedish and English, Roo taught her most of her English and Virginia taught her some English when she visited, and Deli was able to fill in the dots for English herself. Juno is a Swede-Spaniard, she's fluent in Spanish and English, although her Spanish speaking skills are slowly becoming more and more rusty as Mateo progressively speaks more English to her.

Age, death and relationships:

Virginia and Reese met in High School, and were inseparable since than, eventually beginning to date when she was 18, and he was 20, and Virginia ended up pregnant with Jordy after one special night Virginia had Jordy when she was 20, and Reese was 24 Reese died August 5th, 1995 at the age of 31, a couple months before Roo was born, Jordy was almost 7 years old at the time, and Virginia was 29 years old Reese's cause of death is unknown (aka undetermined, haven't chosen what it should be yet) After Reese died, Virginia spiraled and began having hookups with guys, one of which was Noah Blom, who, after finding out she was pregnant, decided to stay by her side to care for the child, although regardless, Virginia was determined unable to care for the child, and Noah was to take care of Devan, Virginia co-parented on the sidelines and Noah and her continued to date. After one night, however, she completely vanished, leaving Noah, she didn't tell him anything other then that she was off for work. 9 months later, on Feb 16, 2009, she returned to Sweden, to Noah, to hand over her second child of his, Deliahna, to which he was disgusted and perturbed, he couldn't believe she held back such a lie from him, breaking up with her right then and there, however he was still required to take care of Deli, with Virginia co-parenting, and so he did (a terrible job at taking care of my baby Deli). Virginia moved to Spain after a while, to pursue something new and get away from Sweden, which reminded her so much of Reese and what she thought was the cause for her irregular pattern of depression, having another hookup with a man, named Mateo García, they separated shortly after, but it didn't take long for her to come back to him with a pregnancy test that said positive, and where he was elated, she was heartbroken, another child of hers, cursed to a life of no mother, she just wanted one child she could care for, so when it came around for the custody court case, she tried to prove that she was capable of caring for a child, but she was still not allowed to keep custody over Juno, and Mateo gladly took over parenting for Virginia while she recovered, with occasional visits to/for Juno, Mateo and Virginia didn't pursue anything, they felt no attraction to each other, but were glad to co-parent (even though internally Virginia was furious, wishing she could just be the main parent).

If I can think of anymore things that need to be clarified, I will add them later :).

[mooncrack]

A couple hours passed and it's now lunch. Your still on his mind is some shape way or form. But he is now sitting at lunch outside with his boys. Price and Ghost are smoking while Soap is just yapping around

"OooOoOoh! Did you hear about the new exchange student-! The fresh blood-!"

"Johnny. Don't refure to the new student as fresh blood."

"Shup up, Ghost nobody cares. Anyways they seem PERFECT for a little prankkkk~"

"God, you with your stupid little pranks."

"Womp womp, you gonne cry about it?"

"Guys, calm down."

"Okay, dad." Both Ghost and Soap say at the same time. But Gaz is more focused on what he said before. "They seem perfect for a little prank." Oh. Hell. No. Gaz, wants to win them over and know that enemies to lovers only happends in fiction.

"Leave them alone Soap, there nice"

"OooOoOoh~ does mister handsome have a crush on the new foreign student~?"

"I DON'T. They helped me acsualy understand math, so I'm thinking about convincing them to tutor me for free."

"Wow, they acsualy made you understand math?!? This is a moment in history"

"Oh, go fuck yourself"

"Gladly. But I guess I'll leave them alone for now. But you defenetly have a crush on them"

"Johnny Mactavish I SWEAR TO GOD-"

Meanwhile you where chilling in a corner, head phones on. Reading a book your intredted in. You haven't made friends yet, with you exspected. Your fine on your own. You have gotten picked on a couple times, for your accent, or the way you dress. But nobody here could compeat to what your old school use to say. So your at peace, just reading. Nobody seems to try and come over and pick on you or anything. Weird. Break are the perfect time for bulling. Atleast at my old school.

You look up from your book and look around. There are groups of people loudly talking, some pointing at you and giggling. Wow they don't even have the guts to come up to you.

Pussies.

Little did you know that Gaz as you've leard people called him, would shoot death glares at anybody who would get close to you to pick on you. And this just Confirms to the 141 that he is 100% inlove with you. Price had it's doubts at first, but the feath stares dom't leave any doubts. They know he has been single for way to long. To the point Soap was talking about setting him up with one of the simps. But know, they could play cupid with somebody he acsualy likes.

The 141 likes to play cupido with there m̶e̶m̶b̶e̶r̶s̶ friends. They did it with both Price and Lasswell before. And know they can do it for Gaz.

And he has picked his suter.

You.

And there not gonna ruin that for him.

Nonononono.

There going to help him.

A couple weeks have passed and you've sort of setteld in. Also this uniform if ugly and very much uncomfortable, It could be worse. You and Gaz have grown closer. No friends. More like mutuals. But he is 100% the person your the closest with. He's been kind enough to exsplain the unwrithen rules here (lets be honest every school has them)

there is also this nother boy named Philips who is from america and moved here last year. It was obvius that he was from america sinds he's loud and his thick southen accent gives it away within seconds.

But he told you about a group called 141. At first you were confused, but then he exsplained it. And color you shocked when you hear that Kyle. The guy I'm sorta friends with and help with math, is in there. Oh, so maybe thats why you haven't been picked on- damn this school is full of pussies. Back home they didn't care about your statuse. A easy victim is a easy victim. But I'm getting of track. There is aperently MUTIBUL of these kinna groups and they all do NOT get along. Maybe this is kinna the same as back home-

there is the Shadow's and the Konni's. Weird ass names. But when you ask for more info, he won't give any up, because

"Look, just stay away from any of the groups. You'll know if there apart of one of them you see them"

Bitch. Maybe Kyle can give you more info about the Shadow's and Konni's...

-------------------------------------------------------

Hallo. I finnish this in school and there was no proof reading so it's exstra shitty. And sorry it's so long, but the first draft was SO univentfull for me. Anyways, I hope y'all enjoyed and if you have any tips or sugestions feel free to comment them^^ (just don't correct my spelling)

Ps: tumblr won't allow me to comment, so hold on while I fix that

Doei!

[kaleidoscope1967eyes]

how do you think luke would be with pets?

Thanks for the ask, anon! I don't know if any canon or legends material really touches on this, which is such a shame because I think he would be so good with animals!

Luke has always been a fan of all sorts of creatures. As a little boy on Tatooine, he loved playing with and riding his friend Windy's dewback. He did have a pet of his own growing up: the Lars family owned a spotted sandhound named, you guessed it, Sandy. Even though she was an old girl, Luke would always run around the farm with her and try to teach her tricks, and she'd always do her best to keep up with him.

Sandy was extremely protective of him, to the point where it cost her life; when he was around thirteen years old, a group of womp rats ambushed him while he was tending to some moisture vaporators, and she immediately rushed in to take all the fatal blows. It was absolutely devastating, but in a rare moment of vulnerability, Owen used the situation to teach Luke about the inevitability of loss and the importance of appreciating those you love in the moment--a skill that would ultimately be very relevant to his jedi training.

On the topic of jedi training, animals are naturally drawn to him due to his strong presence in the force. Sometimes this means an entire flock of jubba birds will land on him and all start singing, other times it means large, predatory creatures will locate him very easily and try to eat him. Luke absolutely hates fighting or attacking animals. He is forever haunted by the time he literally disarmed a wampa--he was only trying to scare it away, he didn't mean for it to actually make contact with his lightsaber. You remind him that even though he didn't have a choice, he still did the right thing by giving it a chance to live.

I know I've talked about this before, but Luke would be a total horse girl (boy). He's great with dewbacks and he's great with tauntauns, so he would definitely also be great with equinoids like pulgas, orbaks, and guarlaras. Even though horses are usually extra skittish around men, they're perfectly fine around him because they can sense just how kind and gentle he is. They especially appreciate that he's intuitive and empathetic enough to know never to raise his voice or make sudden movements around them.

After noticing Luke's knack for critters, you decide to get him a pet of his own. You end up getting him a rescue tooka cat you found in a shelter at Mos Espa: it's a playful, snuggly orange tabby that's missing its right paw. What a strange coincidence, you thought, gently picking it up. Luke deserves to know he's not alone.

When Luke came back to your shared quarters on Home One and saw a kitty on his bed, he was ecstatic. He literally started crying--thankfully, you had R2 there to record his reaction. Because you found it on Tatooine, Luke decided to call it "Lars" in honor of his family. They end up doing everything together: he goes to briefings with Lars stretched out on his shoulders, they go on joyrides in his x-wing together, etc. People get a huge kick out of how close they are--"guy who blew up the Death Star crying over a cat" ends up becoming a huge meme in the Rebellion.

Tagging: (comment if you want to be tagged or you want me to stop tagging you)

@stonegoldsxcrxt

@laserbrains

@fandom-gal44

@myevilmouse

@hansonveggieclub

@lex-the-flex

@ancient-stardust

@dailydragon08 (happy birthday!)

@spacesurfing

@starobi

@starryluce

@hxney-lemcn

@lukefics

@demigoddessqueens

@micheleamidalajedi

@princessxkenobi

[jackiesarch]

— OCS AS HISTORICAL ROMANCE HERO ARCHETYPES

i’m not sorry about this one actually. drag these men through the mud. destroy them, even. call them out.

tagged by @corvosattano to just that. thank you macy. thank you for also innately knowing what they were gonna get.

tagging @unholymilf @florbelles @confidentandgood @nightbloodbix @marivenah @indorilnerevarine @chuckhansen @queennymeria @adelaidedrubman @shallow-gravy @inafieldofdaisies @risingsh0t @roofgeese @loriane-elmuerto @cptcassian and anyone else who wants to take a stab!

— THE RAKE

Oh, the rake. "Rake" is a broad term, and a lot of heroes can BE rakes, there's a certain iconic vibe to a Rake Classic. A rake FUCKS. And not in an annoying way. Like, a rake would slip out of your bed, kiss you gently, and say "I'm so glad we shared this time together" in a way that suggests you'll never see him again, but you'll still say thank you. A rake doesn't want to settle down, but he deeply appreciates women. He may say things like "I actually think women do have rights. Hell, perhaps they should even vote" because he's like... not a feminist, but a big believer in the power of pussy. He doesn't HATE love, it's just not for him. Until it is. Rakes can often fence, do a gentlemanly boxing, and perhaps duel, but they are *not* your first choice in a fight. They are probably beloved at the local brothels, both because they fuck so good and because they spend all their money there. A rake may be titled; however, he may also be a second son (womp womp). It's vERY possible that a rake has mommy issues. Give him time, and he will confide in you. Probably while telling you that is why... he cannot love. The rake may not be good at a lot of things that aren't sex. This might be his secondary crisis, and his arc might involve "Rake Gets Job?" Rake recs: "Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake" by Sarah MacLean, "The Duke and the Lady in Red" by Lorraine Heath, "The Lady Gets Lucky" by Joanna Shupe, "A Rake's Guide to Seduction" by Caroline Linden, "Indigo" by Beverly Jenkins

— THE TORTURED HERO

Look—he just doesn't wanna talk about it. The tortured hero has a dark past, which probably involves his childhood, may involve one or both of his parents dying (or: a dead wife), and will be withheld from you for at least the first half of the book. He fucks like an absolute demon (usually to make you forget about the questions you asked regarding his scars; it's effective), he may have nightmares where he says what you think is his old lover's name so you steam about it for 20-50 pages and he's like "no, that's my childhood dog, which I had to eat when food became scarce", maybe his dad didn't love him, and he is more likely to be self made than some other heroes. Though he may also be a duke whose actions had consequences. There's a *distinct* possibility that he's mentally unwell, but everyone needs love. Your one big issue is that he... may not think he's worthy of touching you with his filthy hands. Somehow, you must overcome this. Tortured recs: "My Darling Duke" by Stacy Reid, "Dreaming of You" by Lisa Kleypas, "A Lady for a Duke" by Alexis Hall, "Pippa and the Prince of Secrets" by Grace Callaway, "Duke of Midnight" by Elizabeth Hoyt, "The Duke I Tempted" by Scarlett Peckham, "A Rogue by Any Other Name" by Sarah MacLean

— THE GOOD GUY

Isn't that great for you? The good guy isn't a NICE guy. He doesn't expect sexual favors because he's nice to you; and he's so charming, he can probably get laid elsewhere. He may have a tragic backstory and a fatal flaw, but that's not going to get him down. He doesn't play at alpha male bullshit, and he may not be a duke, or a lord, or the owner of the world's first department store. But he's a Solid Guy. He will love, honor, and obey, and he will NOT! Do a nonsense. He will, however, eat pussy. He's a good guy. Good guy recs: "Unclaimed" by Courtney Milan, "Scandal in Spring" by Lisa Kleypas, "My Fake Rake" by Eva Leigh, "Unmasked by the Marquess" by Cat Sebastian

[qqueenofhades]

About Ayn Rand philosophy: you are right and you should say it: it is ME ME ME. It’s soooo weird to just discuss things with a person and then suddenly you are met with “ah but you see everything that I’ve done is FAIR and I’ve DESERVED IT, but everything that I don’t have is NOT FAIR and I NEED it”. I’m not shitting you, the other day I had to listen to a girl tell me (a person in academia) that people in academia deserve small salaries because they don’t bring money to universities. I shit you not. This is what she said. I had to stop and explain to her, that a) this is not how universities make money, b) there would be no universities without the academia, and it felt like talking to a brick wall UNTIL she remembered that her dad was in the academia and was like oh ok.. my dad deserves money. Took her an embarrassing amount of time too.

And I was participating in this bonkers conversation and suddenly it fucking hit me that she was being Like That TM because in my estimation of what kind of salary a dean should have I named a number that is higher then her own salary and of her husband and she found it unfair. UNFAIR. Like the idea that someone who has a different lifestyle from a frankly unimpressive young coder for a minor firm might get the same amount of money as her, or, gasp, more, seemed unfair to her. Because when she was deciding what to do with her life, she chose the most profitable option for her and god forbid if someone makes another choice and is happy too

But still I do think that a lot of people are straight up misinformed about the far right, or think that when they vote for a racist it won’t have a lot of consequences. At least where I am from it is very easy to see that most people don’t care or are very neutral, but don’t like “icky” stuff. And you can paint for example LGBTQ+ as something that is other and scary, but it’s hard because they are just people. Abortions are also very trivial and you have to work hard to print it as something scary.

But violence? Violence makes people uncomfortable, even those who don’t know much beside violence.

So I do believe is that people are stupid and not rational at all, yeah, but violence scares them a lot. And maybe this is why they sway towards the most violent movement, to give it what it wants just so that it would shut up.

Indeed. As a fellow person in academia who has often heard the "LMAO HUMANITIES DEGREES ARE WORTHLESS OF COURSE YOU SHOULDN'T EXPECT TO GET PAID" and other such nonsense, it's truly amazing how much people feel that everyone else is definitely out to scheme and steal from them and take what is Rightfully Theirs (and yet, somehow never seem to say this about the billionaires and other resource hogs who actually ARE sucking up everything that belongs to everyone else). It is also part of the "only people who Deserve It should access social services" or "of course I want there to be money for/programs for social services, but they need to be used only in the Right Way." Which, of course, doesn't make sense at all, but is often how they explain it away. Then suddenly whoops, they need those services too, and yet they've consistently voted to take them away from other people who didn't "deserve" them. So now they aren't there anymore. Womp womp.

I do think you have a point about the violence, unfortunately. As we have seen re: the war in Ukraine and many times before, when someone is acting in a violent and threatening way, the response seems to be just "give them what they want and hope they go away." If people still resist the violence and try to make it stop in other ways (such as, you know, fighting back) they often get blamed for not just rolling over and giving the aggressor what they want, as if the situation is their fault for continuing to resist. So yeah, the appeasement mentality still runs DEEP, even if it has never once actually worked, and only leads to an even worse situation than before.

[grandmascokebag]

Soccer balls, More Like Sock Her balls

Chapter 1

It was a brisk morning with clear skies and chirping birds. Yuji skipped down the concrete sidewalk, waving at his new neighbors as he left for school.

Wow, what a beautiful morning, Yuji thought to himself. It’s almost nice enough to make me forget my grandfather, the only parental figure I ever had in my life, dying this morning in front of me. I saw him take his last breath as his eyes clouded over and he passed on to the next life.

Welp, got no time to cry about that! Today is my first day at Jujutsu High, where I have a soccer scholarship!

Yuji walked into the gates. It’s times like these that I miss my grandfather’s ability to drive. Or be alive.

Womp womp, he cheered himself up.

Suddenly, a hot pink Corvette revved into the parking lot obnoxiously, blasting 212 by Azaelia Banks loud enough to shake the asphalt under Yuji’s feet.

“I guess that cunt gettin’ eaten. I guess that cunt gettin’ eaten. I guess that cunt gettin’ eaten.”

A boy around Yuji’s age sprinted out of the car before it fully stopped, slamming the door though it did nothing to lessen the noise.

The window rolled down and a white-haired man leaned far enough to jingle the pink dice hanging by the mirror. “Have a good day at school, sweetie!”

The boy flipped him off, not looking up as he walked over to Yuji.

“You must be the new student. Yuji Itadori, right?”

Now that he was closer, Yuji noticed how pretty he was, with long eyelashes fanning over his soft cheekbones, stylishly spiked hair, and eyes dark enough to get lost in. His eyebrows scrunched together in what looked like confusion and oh MY GOD SAY SOMETHING HE ASKED YOU A QUESTION YOU FUCKING DUMBASS.

“Um what? I mean yes! That’s me! LOL.”

“Did you just say ‘el oh el’ out loud?”

The bell quite literally saved Yuji’s ego from answering the question as it rang. “Saved by the bell!”

WHY WOULD YOU FUCKING SAY THAT OUT LOUD.

“Yeah, I guess. My name is Megumi by the way.”

“Oh that’s such a pretty name!” Good job, Yuji, you saved it

“Oh, you’re calling it pretty because it’s a girl’s name? Next thing you know, you’ll be calling me pretty in an attempt to emasculate me 'cause I’m gay, right?”

“What no I-”

"You hate gay people, right?”

“No, no I-"

“You’re calling me a twink, right?”

“No, I’M ALSO GAY.”, Yuji exclaimed this all too loud, causing everyone in the courtyard to stop and stare at him.

The silence was deafening and excruciating.

Yuji wanted to join his grandfather in the afterlife.

A girl in the crowd started laughing boisterously, breaking the tense atmosphere. As everyone slowly returned to their previous business, she approached casually, throwing an arm around Megumi.

“Yo, fatherless. Are we still on to watch the Bachelorette later tonight?”

“Personal space, Nobara. Also shut up and no, just for that comment.”

The girl rolled her eyes and Yuji felt terribly awkward. To bond over similar situations, Yuji quickly said, “My parents are absent too! And my grandfather died just this morning! Also, my dog got run over.”

Nobara looked weirded out, but Megumi looked at Yuji in a different light, his expression softening. “Oh. I didn't know that. Sorry for taking out my bad mood on you, by the way. My guardian, Gojo, is being a real bitch; I wish he died this morning”

Yuji started laughing, with Megumi joining in softly later. The girl frowned as she left. “Fucking gay freaks,” she muttered as she walked off, joining a green-haired girl and kissing her cheek.

As the courtyard emptied out, only Yuji and Megumi were left, smiling softly at one another.

Megumi quickly cleared his throat. “So, the tour?”

“Oh, yeah, right! Lead the way!”

Megumi walked through the halls as Yuji quickly hurried to follow.

“So, you’ve already met Nobara. The girl she was with is Maki Zenin, her girlfriend. They’re both on the soccer team. Originally, girls weren’t allowed to play the sport, but they hatched a plan together last year to threaten the principal into submission. One thing led to another, and plans turned into dates. It’s the romance story of the ages, or so they say.”

Megumi rolls his beautiful eyes, tinged in starlight and oh shit I should pay attention to what the fuck he's saying instead of his eyes FUCK.

“Next is the band kids,” Megumi stated as they walked past a classroom filled with discordant music and yelling.

“SHUT THE FUCK UP,” a voice exclaimed and, miraculously, everyone did.

“Yeah, that’s Inumaki Toge. He doesn’t say much, but people listen when he does. There’s a rumor circulating that he’s half siren, but the reality is that he has blackmail on practically everyone in the school. Pro tip: don’t insult him. Or his boyfriend for that matter, Yuuta Okkotsu. Though you don’t need to worry much about him. He disappeared last year under mysterious circumstances. Supposedly, he got a scholarship to study abroad, but no one has heard from him since. Oh well.”

“Wait is he like OK-”

“Moving on, there are plenty of other people in band, like useless Miwa or ugly-ass rat-faced dumpster trash fucking Mechamaru.”

“Woah, do you have a grudge or something?”

“No, why do you ask?”

“Oh, uh, no reason!”

Megumi frowned. “OK anyway. There’s a huge betting pool on when Miwa and Mechamaru will get together. They both like each other a lot; Mechamaru even joined band just for her despite being in the robotics club. Many people think that’s a sweet romantic gesture, but personally, I think he’s a pussy who should grow some fucking balls.

“Oh, look there, that’s Todo and Mai. Todo is part of the soccer team. Don’t talk to him; he’ll ask for your type of woman and wrestle you to prove his superiority. Or something. He’s annoying.

“Mai is not really any better. She is Maki’s twin sister but they couldn’t be more different. Where Maki is gruff but sweet in her own way, Mai will bully you about watching Barbie until you cry in front of the classroom on show-and-tell in first grade while everyone, including the teacher, laughs at you, even though, objectively, Barbie and the Three Musketeers is a very masculine movie centering on war and friendship.”

There was a brief pause as Megumi turned to look at Yuji, clearly having forgotten that he was there. His cheeks dusted pink as he waited for Yuji’s reaction.

“Oh, I love Barbie and the Three Musketeers!” Yuji smiled wide. “Though personally, my favorite is Barbie: The Princess and the Pauper.”

“Really! I always loved that movie too! My sister Tsumiki used to make fun of me for singing along.”

“That’s so cool that you have a sister! My older brother left me when I was seven.” Yuji paused. “We should totally watch Barbie together!”

Megumi nodded excitedly before catching sight of Mai snickering behind her hand. “We should move on.”

The boys paused in front of a classroom. A vaguely familiar-looking white-haired man with sunglasses gestured towards a big contraption of metal in front of the classroom.

“Now class, what will happen when I smash this with a big hammer?”

He swung downwards without waiting for an answer. A fiery explosion rocked the school as the sprinkler system turned on. As the students clearly panicked while the teacher laughed hysterically, Megumi turned to Yuji with a serious expression.

“This is the worst teacher in this entire goddamn circus of a school. He constantly endangers his students with his dangerous and unethical experiments, never even teaching the physics material properly, and most of his tests consist of questions about his personal life. Never take a class with this fucking clown; spending time with him increases the urge to kill yourself.”

The teacher looked up, locking eyes with Megumi. “Oh, my sweet baby boy, is that you, my beautiful son?”

He rushed towards the doorway as Megumi quickly and efficiently closed the door, hearing a thud from the other side as the man faceplanted into it.

“He’s also my guardian, Gojo. Let’s leave quickly before he wakes up.”

Megumi dragged a concerned Yuji away.

“Last stop is Professor Geto’s history classroom. He’s pretty chill. All he does is try to discreetly recruit his students into his bullshit cult, so watch out for that. And don’t mention him to Gojo; you don't even want to know the number of times I’ve been subjected to a dramatic retelling of their breakup.”

A mysterious high-pitched growling started, and Megumi grabbed Yuji’s arm in clear panic. “Close the door, close the door oh my god.”

The boys slammed the door shut and sprinted away, Megumi dragging Yuji along by the hand. Though Yuji should have been very concerned over what just happened, all he could focus on was the warmth of Megumi’s hand in his. They finally stopped in front of another classroom, Megumi belatedly letting go of his hand.

Megumi shuddered, looking vaguely sick. The bell rang again and he snapped out of it. “Well, time to get you to class. Luckily, we share Professor Nanami’s English class together. He is nice, kinda boring, and drops weird traumatic lore once in a while. He also grades harshly, so I hope you’re good at writing essays.”

“Don’t worry, I’m an expert,” said Yuji, who was notorious for failing all his essays at his previous school.

The two boys nabbed seats together in the back as a young peppy man entered, wearing a beanie.

“Hey guys! I’m the TA for this class, Ino Takuma! Feel free to ask me any questions, as I'm usually the one grading your essays!”

The class remained silent as many students snoozed in their seats.

“OK awesome! Professor Nanami will be arriving shortly!” Ino discreetly checked his phone.

The door opened as a tall and intimidating blonde man entered. “Hello, class. I apologize for my tardiness,” the man, obviously Professor Nanami, began in a monotone voice, “the line at the bakery was very long. Let's start with a classroom exercise where we go around the class and state 3 fun facts about ourselves. I’ll go first, to give an example: my name is Nanami Kento, I like sandwiches, dislike tomatoes, and I know at some point this will come out, and will ruin the trajectory of the whole class, but I watched my best friend die in front of me when I was 14. Who wants to go next?”

Wow, that was dark. I hate when people trauma dump, it’s so self-centered.

“How about you, young man?” Nanami looked straight at Yuji.

Crap, what to say? I know!

“Hi! My name is Yuji Itadori! My favorite movie is Earthworm 3, I like Jennifer Lawrence and my grandfather died this morning.”

“Good good, just like that. We’ll proceed in a counter-clockwise fashion. You next, young lad.” Professor Nanami gestured towards Megumi.

“Good morning, my name is Megumi Fushiguro. I like tea and my favorite band is kind of underground; you probably haven't heard of them, but it is Radiohead.

“Shut the fuck up,” muttered Nobara, who Yuji had not noticed was behind them.

Megumi ignored her. “And lastly, I hate Gojo Satoru.”

Nanami slowly approached the boy’s desk, towering over him, before giving him a crisp high five. “A+, Mr. Fushiguro.”

The class continued in a similar fashion until the bell rang.

Better head to soccer practice, or I’ll lose my scholarship! That would be bad, because then I would be kicked out of school and homeless because no one is looking after me currently.

******************************

When Yuji arrived at the field, he saw the white-haired man from earlier- Professor Gojo, right?- yelling at a small group of teens gathered there.

Yuji quickly jogged over, not wanting to be late for his first practice. He found a familiar spiky mess of dark hair and went to stand next to Megumi.

“Alright guys. It is seriously not that hard to come up with a good team name and no, Megumi”- the teen next to Yuji put his hand down guiltily- “Team Kill Yourself is not an acceptable option. Oh, is that a newcomer I see?”

Yuji waved excitedly before Megumi grimaced and gently pulled his hand down.

The rest of the tram turned to look expectantly at him, and he recognized a few familiar faces: the blunt Nobara, intimidating Maki, pretty Mai, broad Todo, a few nameless faces, and a mysterious man in a panda suit.

“Um hi! My name is Yuji Itadori and I’m really excited to be helping this team!”

“Well, Yuji Itadori, do you have any name suggestions?” Gojo peered at Yuji over his glasses and Jesus Christ put some contacts on.

“Hmmmmm….. Maybe…..” Yuji clapped his hands together as an epiphany struck him. “How about the Jujutsu Sorceror Team?”

There was a brief pause as everyone digested the new information with considering looks.

“Wow…” began Gojo, “that was seriously the corniest shit I’ve ever heard of. I mean, even Team Kill Yourself is better than that. Hmm… Let’s just go with Team Sock Her Balls.”

A boy Yuji did not recognize shyly raised his hand. “Wouldn’t we get in trouble with the school-?”

“Shut up, nerd. I don't even remember your name, god. Anyways, actual relevant people, let’s begin practice.”

Everyone separated out into the fields as Yuji followed Megumi, who luckly didn't seem to mind.

A harsh poke on the shoulder caused Yuji to turn around, spying Todo towering over him.

“Hello?”

“Hello, Yuji Itadori. What is your type of woman?”

“Jesus Christ, not this again,” Nobara muttered from behind Yuji.

“Ha! I wouldn't expect you to understand, though I can ask your type of man later, if you would prefer.” Todo struck a pose flexing his muscles.

“First of all, me? With a man? You must be out of your goddamn pea-sized brain, you stupid oaf. Second of all-” Nobara reared her fist back and swung forward, straight into Todo’s nose.

Todo was knocked backwards, a stream of blood erupting from his nose. From the ground, he weakly said, “Oh, you’re gay? That’s cool too. What’s your type of woman..?”, before passing out.

“Ughhhh are you serious, Nobara? Soccer is about kicking, not punching!” Gojo complained. “Yuji, take Todo to the nurse’s office; no one else will do it.”

Yuji looked at Megumi with panic before the other boy sighed and gently pointed out the directions to “Nurse Shoko”. Yuji lugged the broader boy across the field, dodging balls that almost seemed to aim at the prone body before Todo woke up and only needed a little assistance.

Yuji eventually found the nurse’s office in a secluded corner of the school. He knocked gently before Todo waltzed in, seemingly familiar with its white wall already. Yuji followed closely behind.

A beautiful woman, Nurse Shoko, who was smoking in both ways, leaned against the wall lazily as they entered.

“Oh great, it’s Todo again,” she said, blowing a puff of smoke in their general direction.

“Is smoking allowed at school?” Yuji asked, perplexed.

“What are you, a tattletale? Shut up and get back to practice, weirdo.”

Yuji returned to the field, glancing back at Shoko providing Todo tissues lazily. As he returned though, he realized practice was over.

Well, better head back to gramp’s house to pack up my things to move into the dorms here. Man, I will miss my house. And my grandfather.

****************************************************************************************

Yuji arrived at his late grandfather’s house, pointlessly announcing “I’m home,” as he took off his shoes.

“Man, I will really miss this place. More than that, I’ll really miss gramps.”

Yuji jumped as a sudden noise upstairs echoed through the supposedly abandoned house.

“Who’s there? I have a knife,” Yuji lied.

Yuji crept up the stairs, only armed with his fists and his fear. He approached his bedroom door, slightly cracked open. As he tried to enter quietly, the door squeaked so fucking loudly that everyone and their dead grandfathers probably heard.

Crap.

“Sup baby bro!” A voice Yuji never thought he would hear again.

Could it be…

“It’s me, Sukunaaaaaa.”

Wow, it really is him!

Yuji fully entered the door, dropping his fists and defenses completely. “Wow Sukuna! I never thought I’d see you again after you left me nine years ago!”

“Yeah well, things changed; I got tattoos and gambled, grandfather died and supposedly had a huge fortune hidden away, haha you know, the usual. Speaking of which, where's that old decomposing dirtbag’s will?

“Oh, you’re still just as funny as you were nine years ago! I’ll go get it from the kitchen!”

Yuji and his long lost older brother walked to the kitchen together.

“Wow, your tattoos look pretty neat,” Yuji said, trying to start a conversation as he gestured to his brother’s facial tattoos.

“Haha yeah, I got them in prison.”

“Oh…”

Mercifully, they arrived at the kitchen. “Saved by the kitchen!”

“What?”

“Nothing! Let me get that will for you.” Yuji rummaged through the drawer before finding the very important piece of paper that probably should not have been in a kitchen drawer. “Well, let’s read it together!”

The paper read:

I, Wasuke Itadori, in good health and sound mind, dedicate all my fortune to my favorite grandson, Yuji Itadori, the light of my life, when he comes of age. I hereby declare that absolutely NONE of my fortune will go to my other bitchass grandson, Sukuna unless there is literally no other option, like Yuji dying or something idk. Peace bitches!

P. S. Choso can get $5.

“Haha wonder who that Choso guy is! Anyways, did that answer your questions?”

“... Yes. Yes it seems so. It seems that I need to get in contact with some old friends… HahahahahahHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHA” Sukuna starts laughing evilly, just like he did when chasing Yuji around with a knife when they were younger. Ah, the good old days.

What could possibly go wrong?

[kevinsreviewcatalogue]

Review: Never Hike Alone: The Ghost Cut (2020)

Never Hike Alone: The Ghost Cut (2020)

Not rated

<Originally posted at https://kevinsreviewcatalogue.blogspot.com/2023/10/review-never-hike-alone-ghost-cut-2020.html>

Score: 4 out of 5

If you've read my, or anybody else's, reviews of the Friday the 13th series, you'd know that it has a very spotty track record. The first movie is hardly most people's pick for the best in the series, the fact that there were more than twice as many films after the one titled The Final Chapter than before it has made the series the butt of jokes about horror franchises that get run into the ground, and nearly half the movies in this series range from just mediocre to borderline unwatchable. In short, it's an iconic slasher series where it wouldn't take much to make a movie that's around the middle of the pack quality-wise where its installments are concerned. And given the long legal battle that plagued this series for much of the 2010s, leave it to the fans to make just such a film. Never Hike Alone: The Ghost Cut is an anthology-style compilation of three Friday fan films by Womp Stomp Films that together range from pretty good to one of the most inspired things ever done with the idea of a big guy in a hockey mask hacking people up with a machete. It's a labor of love that (being a non-commercial fan film) is free to watch online, and which I highly recommend doing.

The film starts with a music video called "Disappear", a darkly humorous opening where Jason Voorhees hacks up three teenagers who ventured into the ruins of Camp Crystal Lake to drink and screw, all soundtracked by the titular acoustic guitar song by Trevor Vaughan. It sets the mood very nicely, playing right into our expectations of what a Friday movie is and delivering exactly that, while also examining just what Jason might be like in his "downtime" when he's not hacking people to bits. The second segment, Never Hike in the Snow, started out strong by showing Jason in an environment that's new to him: the winter, chasing and killing a young man named Mark Hill through the snowy woods. It starts off strong with a great buildup to a great kill, though as it went on it became the weakest segment in the film by my estimation, turning increasingly disjointed with plots about the sheriff Rick Cologne (a returning character from Jason Lives played by the same actor, Vincent Guastaferro) comforting the victim's mother, the same sheriff having to deal with Tommy Jarvis (again, returning from Jason Lives with Thom Mathews reprising his role) as news of the murder causes him to come out of the woodwork suspecting that Jason is back, and a scene of a hapless deputy going into the woods searching for clues as to Mark's murder. Each scene was exceptionally well-shot even by the standards of a professionally produced film, let alone a fan flick, but while there were interesting ideas, especially in the scene with the mother, it didn't come together particularly well.

Fortunately, the film spent the next hour with its best part by far, its titular centerpiece originally filmed and released in 2017 and later included with the other two segments as the "Ghost Cut". This is mostly a one-man show in which a hiking influencer named Kyle McLeod ventures into the trails of the Wessex County forest, stumbles upon Camp Crystal Lake, and must fight for survival against Jason. Much of the first half is a slow burn as Kyle ventures deeper and deeper into Jason's turf, with growing clues that something isn't right, from the coyotes wailing in the distance one night to the "No Trespassing" sign he encounters to various signs of the carnage past at the long-abandoned camp. It's an effective buildup that's paid off wonderfully when Jason himself shows up to kick ass and take names. He's played here by the film's director Vincente DeSanti, and watching him, I felt something I had only rarely felt in the past watching the Friday films: genuinely afraid of Jason. All too often, Jason gets portrayed as a crowd-pleasing mascot who the film not-so-secretly sides with as he takes out the trash, rendering him less a monster than a roguish anti-hero of sorts. Not here. This movie portrays him as a mean, brutish, no-nonsense, and surprisingly cunning villain who could probably kill you with his bare hands, let alone his machete, and who you absolutely do not want to mess around with. It helped that Drew Leighty as Kyle was a guy who I could easily root for. He may be a YouTuber, but the film avoids making him an obnoxious caricature for the sake of it, with scenes of him grumbling about the spon-con deal he's doing with the company that made the collapsible shovel he's carrying. And when push comes to shove towards the end, he turns into a real-deal survivor who feels like a genuine match for Jason. I wanted to see this guy live and prevail, which was more than I could say for a lot of the people who've crossed paths with Jason, and that fact made me fear what Jason was trying to do to him that much more.

The Bottom Line

It's rare for a fan film to be this good, but Never Hike Alone: The Ghost Cut manages to be not only better than a lot of the actual Friday the 13th films, but a damn good horror movie in its own right. Even if you're not a Friday fan, I still recommend giving this one a look, especially since it's free and easily accessible.

[chill-that-ur-inmyhead]

What are three names you like that start with the same letter as your fist name? Hailey, Harry, Hannah

How old will you turn on your next birthday? 25

What are three things you like about your birth month (besides it being the month your birthday is in)? Aquarius, I like the winter weather and majority of my friends also have their birthday's around that time

…and what are three things you dislike about it? It is close to valentine's day so my ex said that the celebration would be combined (I didn't mind too much but womp womp) It's a day before my mum's birthday and I used to hate that it was usually during school time

List three celebrities that are the same height as you. Emma Watson, Selena Gomez and Jennifer Anniston (WIN)

Are you happy with your height, or do you wish you were shorter or taller? Why? I wouldn't mind being 5'6 or 5'7 but no taller

Which family member did you inherit your hair colour from? Probs my dad's side of the family.

List three things in nature that are the same color as your eyes. 👀 Grass, leaves, trees lol

Are you happy with your current weight, or do you wish you weighed more or less? No way, less pls.

If applicable, how many pounds do you want to lose? 2 stone

How many years has it been since you were last a student enrolled in school? 🏫 I am still enrolled in university but will be graduating this year :)

What was your favourite class in high school? I really enjoyed maths class mainly because I got put into a group where we could work at the same pace and it was really supportive class!

How many sisters do you have? Zero.

How many brothers do you have? Uno.

If you had a twin sister, what would she be named? Maybe Imogen since that is another name my parents liked.

How many dogs have you had in your lifetime? 🐶 Sadly zero

How many cats have you had in your lifetime? 🐈 Sadly zero

Do you prefer dogs or cats? Rabbits hehe

Where was your dad born? Hertfordshire

Where was your mum born? Leicestershire

Where were you born? Essex

Have you ever met anyone unrelated to you that had the same last name as you? Yes, very common last name

How many sister-in-laws do you have? Zero

How many brother-in-laws do you have? Zero

How many nieces do you have? Zero

How many nephews do you have? Zero

How many of your grandparents are still living? Two

Are you good at taking pictures? 📸 I try

What are three things you’ve been complimented on? My smile, my hair and my lipstick application haha

What is your dream job? Lawyer - hopefully a good one

…and are you currently working in your dream job? I am!

Do you consider yourself spiritual? Hmm I think so but not too sure

Do you consider yourself religious? Yes but in a non-traditional sense

Do you have a positive or negative view of the word “religion”? Bit of both. It offered a good community for me when I was growing up and for my family but on the other side I have seen it used in the name of hatred and that sucks.

Do you have a positive or negative view of the word “spiritual”? I think spiritual has become a term where people want to distance themselves from traditional religion. I think that is good but I do think it isn't taken as seriously unfortunately.

Who is the most spiritual person you know? I don't know any personally or we haven't had that discussion yet.

When was the last time you stepped foot inside of a church? ⛪️ Years ago and probs for midnight mass

Do you regularly attend church? Why or why not? ⛪️ Not anymore. I think worship can happen anywhere and a church is not mandatory.

Have you ever been to a mosque? 🕌 nope

Have you ever been to a synagogue? 🕍 Yes on a school trip

What is your favourite religious holiday? Christmas is pretty good.

If applicable, does your faith mean a lot to you? Yes

Do you have the same worldview as your parents? I suppose but it probs deviates from time to time

Have you ever attended a Christian school? 🏫 Yes

How often do you pray? 🙏 Not actively.

Have you ever danced in church? 💃 Sang yes but not danced

Have you ever been baptized, and if so, where and how were you baptized? 🌊 Yes, as a baby in a catholic church

How many presidential elections have you voted in? 🗳️ I do not have presidential elections in my country :)

Are you happy with the current state of your nation? We need improving ofc

How many different medications do you normally take daily? 💊 none

Which medication(s) do you hate the most, and why? Not taken enough to know.

Is your current doctor a male or female? Depends who the appointment is with but last appointment I had a male doctor.

Do you prefer male or female doctors? Why? I haven't had a problem where I think I would feel more comfortable with a woman but I can imagine that would be a reason why

How is your mental health? How has it been lately? Feeling overwhelmed with exams finishing but also the idea of the unknown for what is next.

[martamatta95]

Referring to an earlier post of mine about a possible connection between Cobb and Korkie.

This is a preview of a One shot, it's just a few fragments scattered throughout the story.

Obviously the theme has to do with it is always Dincobb 😍

-------->

"We need more men...", she whispers with some ideas.

"We're rounding them up, but it takes time", Din replies.

The Mandalorian princess's thoughts turn elsewhere, while the others go about their business. There is one who could help her, who has stayed out of all this.

*

"Good morning Foreigner", Jo greets her cordially but handling the rifle with care, "Welcome to Freetown, excuse our mistrust, but what brings you to the city?".

“I'm looking for the marshal", she says bluntly and the young woman wonders if all Mandalorians are that blunt and if Cobb gives off some sort of aroma or hormone that draws them to him like womp rats with syrup.

"For what exactly?".

"He sends Din Djarin to me with a gift. My stay will not be long as I have duties to return to".

Jo looks her up and down with a raised eyebrow, she was under the impression of her that she had told him half truth and half lie.

"Mando's friends, they're ours too", Cobb's voice gets the two women's attention.

And the Mandalorian in blue is frozen staring at him, all the while the marshal approaches reassuring Jo and beckons the newcomer to follow.

The young woman curiously notes that the determined and relentless steps the Mandalorian has taken since she stepped off the ship have become hesitant and shaky.

*

She takes off his helmet wanting to observe that face so aged with his own eyes.

He doesn't hold back. She doesn't hide her emotions from him, it's been so long. And, from the marshal's expressions, she understands that they are a mirror of each other's emotions.

"Korkie...", Bo whispers thinking he must be almost 50 now, his parents were 18 when they conceived him, Korkie Kryze was born in 39 BBY.

Counting with his parents, Korkie was 39 when his father died. He's now he's 47, the age on his face roughened by desert life, giving him more wrinkles and years than he should have.

The marshal sighs, he was a boy the last time he saw her, now he's a man.

"I haven't heard that name for a long time, ba'vodu", Cobb smiles at her and now Bo-Katan is sure of it, it's her sister's same smile

*

And that I was hoping it was just a courtesy visit, but there never was any courtesy with you. Just duty and struggle,” sighs Cobb taking a long swig of spochtka, “Why do you need me? From the rumors that reach me of your war quite a few Clan have joined Mando and his cause".

"Do you know about his role as Mand'alor?".

"I try to stay informed, I never thought the past would come back to haunt me here too. I've tried to erase it and stay away from it".

Bo laughs shaking his head, "You're a terrible liar and a hypocrite. If you really didn't care, you wouldn't be listening to anything Mandalorian news and you wouldn't have taken Fett's armor beyond your need".

Cobb opens his mouth ready to argue, but then closes it forcefully baring his teeth. Why did he always find the right spots to hit him? Even his mother had a great talent in this.

"I don't want to go back for a people who allowed a woman like my mother to die, in a sense they killed her. And the Mandalorians never change, they are always there ready to go back to old habits and violence. They don't know how to do anything else".

Bo-Katan shakes her head, "Not all Mandalorians are like that, not even yours Mando or you would never have given him Fett's armor back."

"Why are you here, aunt?", Cobb cuts short.

"Don't you know?", the red-haired woman looks into his eyes, "Many remember you and your actions against Maul and some consider you the true heir of Mandalore by birthright. They also remember other feats that you accomplished in those years and you were just a kid, imagine what you could do now".

*

Cobb grimaces and bites his tongue not sure how to answer her. If there's one thing he wants to keep from each other it's the life of Korkie Kryze with the life of Cobb Vanth.

"This belongs to you, bury it or sell it. Do with it what you will, but I ask you only one thing, think about it".

Bo-Katan gets up from his seat, not giving him time to retort, "No one knows I came here, no one knows you are alive and deeply connected with the marshal of Freetown."

She puts on her helmet and nods to him, "Glad to see you again, Korkie. I'm leaving in a couple of hours. The rest is up to you."

Cobb waits for her to come out then sigh, now knowing that she is alive and doing what she has always done: fight.

His gaze rests on the bag and biting his lip, he opens it. There within it is his condemnation and his hope.

*

Quick and accurate Blaster shots echo through the hall and then lights in some corners of the large room explode, sending glass shards and sparks falling.

A sudden silence falls between the fighting, the movements frozen in alert to await any new danger. The Nite Owls make their appearance. Din was wondering what had become of them, but something is not right.

The blue, white and silver group commando has red armor with blue decorations and the Kryze house symbol is painted all over the chest in black, on the right shoulder pad there is a familiar symbol in white.

Din has never seen this armor and probably never seen this man who leads the group of the most feared Mandalorians in the galaxy. Bo-Katan joins him, each of them wearing helmets and holding their heads up with pride.

Grogu watches him with his mouth open and stretching his fingers towards him, Din doesn't know it's for some form of greeting or a call for attention.

The fact remains that silence remains in the great hall, while all helmets and faces are turned towards the group and the footsteps of the Nite Owls echoes through the walls like the beating of hammers in a mining tunnel.

“I return after 30 years of exile, following the voices of a faint hope for our people”, the voice echoes through the room, pitched neither too high nor too low.

The distorted voice from the helmet sounds familiar to Din's ears, but he's not sure who he belongs to or who resembles him.

"And here's what I find, massiff dazzling and biting each other".

*

"I know who you are, Korkie Kryze."

The pronunciation of the name unleashes groans of surprise and whispers among the other Mandalorian, while the Nite Owls are left behind in silence, including Bo-Katan.

"You judge us, but where have you been for the past 30 years? I understand you fled after the collapse of Darth Maul's business in Sundari"

If Din was curious before the stranger, now he has a complete interest in him. He didn't know there was another Kryze out there, what connection did he have with Bo-Katan? Is he a brother or a cousin?

"That's like The Armorer, I went into exile because I wanted to clear my mind about everything that happened then. It had to process a deep mourning that circumstances didn't allow me to focus on," explains Korkie calmly, "But there have been some events over the next 15 years that prevented me from knowing the fate of my people or what was happening in the universe. I fought my way to protect people in a place where there was no justice and kindness, I pretended that the past didn 't exist and neither did the blood that runs through my veins".

Korkie hadn't hidden the hatred in those words.

"And why this behavior?", Din does not realize that he has spoken, until the man in red does not turn his visor towards him.

“I hated my people for what happened to Satine Kryze,” he says sincerely and bluntly.

*

"The reason I'm here is you, Din Djarin".

Din doesn't know why, he's faced Dark Troppers or fearsome bounty hunters and imposing creatures, but now he shivers from the weight of that gaze.

Grogu looks out from the stage stretching his hands in Korkie's direction as if he wanted to get his attention, he has never behaved like this with anyone.

The Mandalorian in red, though he doesn't stop looking at Din, moves his hand to take something from one of the pockets on his belt.

"I'm not here for that cursed weapon or to ask you for a duel", he speaks bluntly and takes a chocolate bar out of his pocket.

Grogu's eyes light up as the treat is placed between his tiny fingers, but before he grabs it the little boy strokes Korkie's hand with affection.

Din is surprised by the small gesture of generosity and even more so when the stranger in red strokes his son's head with affection. He did all of this without taking his eyes off the Mand'alor.

"We have mutual friends, Din Djarin, whom I asked about you" .

"Ashoka Tano and Cobb Vanth", he adds resolutely placing his hands on his hips, in that damn familiar posture.

*

"But I want you to know one thing", Korkie's tone is stern, "If you go astray, I won't hesitate to kill you."

There is a heavy silence between the two, Grogu is completely indifferent to the threat that his new favorite has pronounced towards his father.

Korkie huffs a laugh, "Maybe I was too harsh, killing is a bit extreme, sorry".

Din smiles back, "If our roles were reversed, I would have said the same thing".

"I'm glad to know that we understand each other, but the threat remains, I'll kick your ass if you behave inappropriately towards our people or other peoples".

"Roger it, Kryze".

“Call me Cob… Korkie”, the man in red speaks so quickly that Din isn't sure he said anything wrong.

"Call me Din, Korkie".