#also gumshoe talking rude to everyone but edgeworth stands out more

[beneaththebloodylake]

edgeworth always using plain/rude speech in court but switching to polite when hes talking to will powers lol

[moonraccoon-exe]

Consider this: FFXV x Gyakuten Saiban/Ace Attorney. Noctis inheriting Caelum and Co. from Regis, advised by long-time family friend Cor. Cor being adoptive dad to Prompto, and the whole first case where you meet Maya. Ignis and Gladiolus being Edgeworth and Gumshoe. Caligo as Prosecutor Payne. Weskham as Godot. Umbra as Missile. Just imagine that~

DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

YES

YES SO HARD OHMYGO DSAIJDJFKGDFSDKF SDOKFJ

YES OHMYGOD DEAR LORDS ABOVE THIS IS THE AU I DIDN’T KNOW I DESPERATELY NEEDED AND NOW I’M IN A…MIGHTY  N E C E S S I T Y HHGNHNFGH

*THROWS TANTRUM*

I    WANT   THIS    A     U     AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

Dude, yes so hard!!

Defense attorney Noctis! I mean, he already has the black spiky-on-the-back hair and the blue thematic! Besides the non-impressed sort of attitude at times, where the bouncy sidekick is all “HEY HEY LOOK AT THIS FUNNY THING :D” and he’s just “…eh.” BUT without being a too-serious too-dead-inside person. It fits so ridiculously good, dammit!

Veteran defense attorney Cor, I just- *fangasms* HNNNNNNNGGGGGG, YES! Dear Cor being a mentor to dear Noct, aah. Imagine that; the two standing at the defense’s side, Cor being quiet and just going with hinting Noct at what to do. “Did you hear that, Noct? The witness thinks he’s so smart that he didn’t notice he just let out some vital bit of info. You should press him, but be careful with how you word it.”

Hnghngh

Maya!Prompto. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

BUT IT FITS SO GOOD!? The happy cinnamon roll that’s too pure for this world and is always such a happy presence. Always smiling, being a hyperactive little ball of adorableness, enjoying of kids’ TV shows, and being the most loyal of companions to Noct. :’) The very loyal and happy sidekick, that remains badass in his own way. THIS IS A MIGHTY NECESSITY THAT I HAVE FOR THIS AU WITH THESE ROLES GODDAMMIT *punches through wall*

Everything fits so nicely, but Maya!Prompto is definitely the most accurate. Even when they’re sad it fits! You can just imagine the one frame where Maya has the head slightly down, eyes on Phoenix, and tears on the corner of her eyes, and see Prompto like that instead almost like he was made to take the role aaaaaah!

Ignis as Edgeworth and Gladio as Gumshoe COULDN’T HAVE EVER GOTTEN ANY BETTER.

Prosecutor Ignis, though, CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT. UNGH. To start with, Ignis in fancy suits is already fantastic enough and I need it. Now imagine him going “Objection!” and being all smug and confident about his stuff. I just…love this.

And it also fits really nicely, considering the entire “childhood friends” with Noct! :O   AAAAAH

Gumshoe reminded me of Gladio in some ways, but there were two or three parts where I was like “this is ABSOLUTELY some sort of Gladio”. I mean, Gumshoe likes puppies (he’s super fond of Missile, it seems!), he’s this big and tough looking guy but he’s really just a giant teddy bear, always laughing, and even a little naïve at times, he likes flirting with girls at times, but he’s not rude or bad with them, he has this absolute devotion to Ignis/Edgeworth…and not to forget about that time when Gumshoe arrived to Phoenix’s office asking for a job, saying he could be useful and cook, and said his speciality is “Instant noodles”. Hahahahaha!! And later on he says something about his salary being so poor that he’s been living on instant noodles for who knows how long. ABSOLUTELY GLADIO!

Caligo would work great as Payne just for the fact that they’re both annoying AND I HATE BOTH OF THEM.

B   U   T

I HAVE A BETTER ROLE FOR CALIGO.

Just imagine….it’s Caligo but he takes the role of one..

Prosecutor Manfred Von Karma.

*EXPLODES*

I mean, it would be SOOOOOOOO cool considering Edgeworth Ignis! Manfred and Caligo both are men older than Miles/Ignis, both killed a figure that was senior to Miles/Ignis, both hold a huge grudge against Miles/Ignis because Miles/Ignis did something better than them or ruined them in some way and both Miles and Ignis actually physically INJURED them, which is the reason both want revenge on the younger ones and want to ruin their lives, and both are always all “lmao I am so perfect”.

Imagine Caligo taking Ignis under his wing pretending to be an ally but really he’s just waiting for the moment to ruin him…D:

*CHIMES IN THROUGH THE WALL*

ARANEA IS FRANZISKA, RIGHT?

I mean, grey-haired dominatrix with a whip that goes around smacking Noctis and everyone but who’s just doing her job and is actually amazing at it B|

(Omg, Gladio being scared of Aranea, ahahaha)

Weskham as Godot.

OhmygOD….Weskahm as Godot….hnHNGHNGNFGNH-

*SHORT CIRCUITS*

*SHARP INHALE*

I LOVED WESKHAM AS HE IS. I LOVED GODOT AS HE IS.

AND YOU JUST MADE A MIXTURE OF THE TWO!?!?!? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

DUDE, YES!! IT FITS SO AMAZINGLY WELL AAAAAAAAAAAH

The fancy guy in a fancy vest who talks fancily. I NEED THAT.

Imagine Weskham at the prosecutor’s side. He already has the clothes. And now he has a mug of coffee (or perhaps a cup of Altissian wine), and he has that smug smile and shakes the head.

Oh boi, did you see what you just did with Godot!Weskham?

You just shipped Weskham/Cor and made it very much canon, oh my~ ewe

speAKING OF cOr thOUGH

CAN WE PLEASE….NOT KILL HIM, THOUGH? ;A;

Hnhfgnhnfgmhfg, I know in some way Mia lives even if just through Maya and Pearly and in random flashes Phoenix has, but…it’s…not…the same hgnhgfngf

I mean, it would make quite a story! Your second case as an attorney, where they killed one of your dad’s best friends and who was a dear friend to you, and your mentor, and the defendant is no other but COR’S SON HIMSELF what the fahk ohmyfgidkjgfmfd, THE SCANDAL! AAAAH!

…I just- *deep breath* I don’t have the heart to kill Cor… ;w;   Even less to make Prommy walk into his corpse…. ;w;    and be BLAMED for it… ;w;

I DON’T HAVE THE HEART TO DO ANY OF THAT, CAN WE KILL SOMEONE ELSE AND CAN COR LIVE PWEASE

When I first read “Umbra as Missile”, and partly because I was waking up and half asleep as I read it, I was like “Missile, who the hell is Missile. OhnO, surely Missile is a dog that appears later on in Apollo Justice or DD or SoJ and I haVEN’T PLAYED ANY OF THEM, YOU’RE SPOILING MEEEEEEEEEEEE oh wait no Missi- *gaASPS* MISSILE IS THE- AHAHAHA of coooooourse! HOW CUTE! C:”

Goddamit, this is the AU that’s ENDING ME and I happilly accept this end. BOTH GAMES ARE TOO GOOD UNGH MIXING THEM IS LIKE MIXING EPIC WITH EPIC, YOU GET EPIC SQUARE.

Just- imagine that. B|

It’s Final Gyakuten Saiban Fantasy XV. Also known as Final Ace Attorney Fantasy XV. It sounds- weird now that I read it, BUT IT’S THE MOST EPIC GAME/STORY YOU WILL EVER ENCOUNTER.

Noctis Wright Caelum, rookie defense attorney in the job. He likes blue and black suits and has a spiky black hair, and usually comes up with ideas as he’s on the go. He’s usually “wright” ;D

Meet his mentor! Cor Leonis, a more experienced defense attorney and friend to Noctis’ dad, an attorney retired due to health problems (now worries, he’s fine now that he gets to rest). Cor Leonis, usually coming off as rather serious and cold, but is actually a very caring and friendly ally during trial.

His son, Prompto, a rather bouncy and slightly hyperactive young boy, Noctis’ age, passionate for photography, and with rather poor comprehension of the law, BUT incredibly useful when it comes to seeing people’s lies and contradictions.

And on the prosecution’s side, we have one Ignis Scientia! With a mysterious background, Ignis is smart, calculating, sly, dark, and he’s tagged as a genius, having started at age 19/20 and not having lost one single case up until now. And his mentor, oh, yes, the man that took him under his wing when Ignis lost his father under mysterious circumstances…

Caligo von Uldor, a FUCKING PIECE OF GARBAGE.

And he grows up next to one grey haired and slightly aggressive, super sassy Aranea, who started prosecution at age THIRTEEN because she’s a bloody genius. And cheats sometimes. Because she’s still a mercenary as a lawyer but HEY I DIDN’T MAKE THE RULES.

And let’s not forget the friendly and adorable detective Gladiolus Amicitia, a guy that may come off as tough looking at first, but is really just a noodle-obsessed pet-lover flirty adorable precious angel that just wants justice and for everyone to be happy and for those he cares about to be safe. He has absolute devotion to and admires prosecutor Ignis Scientia a lot and would do ANYTHING for him… :’3

Detective Gladio likes to hang with the dog-in-training at the police department Umbra! A NICE FLUFFEEH ADORABLE LITTLE BOY THAT WILL EAT ALL THE SAMURAI HOT DOGS IN ONE GO!

And I would talk about the mysterious prosecutor Armaugh, and maybe also about Cor’s former and apparently now dead boyfriend defense attorney Weskham, but that’s- quite a long story and I’m not sure I should write it all XD

GASPS.

Bro.

Bro…

Twins Stella & Lunafreya…

YOU KNOW FOR WHICH ROLES.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

*HEAD EXPLODES DUE TO MINDBLOW*

CAN TALCOTT BE PEARLY PLEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

Yes. Simply…simply YES to this AU… ;A;

[[There’s no more under the cut other than my own thoughts. It’s not a long answer but I’ll add a keep reading here, buddy c:]]

I recently beat the Ace Attorney trilogy for the first time just a few weeks ago and I’m still absolutely enamored and in love with it. I didn’t think it would be more than just funny criminal cases, didn’t know there was an entire plot and character building and development in there, and I had of course close to not a single idea I would fall for this series SO DEEP AND SO HARD.

And now, thinking about it mixed with the GLORIOUS FFXV that is sorta special to me…

*SOBS*I CAN’T.

THIS IS THE PERFECT CROSSOVER/AU AND I’M STILL IN THAT NECESSITY FOR IT ADH AHSDAS DHA *BAWLS*

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURGH.

Thank you so much for sharing this with me. As I was playing I was trying to think of some way to mix it with FFXV but didn’t put much brain in it. But YOU, my friend, you landed it PERFECTLY and so exquisitely. URGH. Your ask was so glorious to receive and to read through because YES to everything!!!

I’M ALL THE WAY INTO IT FOR ACE ATTORNEY AND FFXV /AND/ FOR ACE ATTORNEY X FFXV ASDKJFKSDJFDS ;A;

I was so happy to receive something AA too, ahaha. I don’t talk much about it because 99% of the people follow me due to FFXV but I’d do it gladly anytime, so I’m SUPER HAPPY that you talked about it with me. BOTH GAMES FILL ME SO MUCH OF SO MANY AND SO INTENSE FEELS HFNJGNF

Now I desperately need art for this. Godot!Weskham, Prosecutor!Ignis, Detective!Gladio…URGH. IT’S ALL TOO GOOD AND THE MENTAL IMAGES IN MY HEAD ARE BRILLIANT (ﾉД`)

GODS, thank you so much for reacing out to me with this LOVELY and wonderful ask. I’M SO INTO THIS HELL AND AU AND I’D GLADLY TALK ABOUT IT ANY DAMN TIME AGAIN KALSDJKLDSFJD

Thank you so, so, so much for dropping this INCREDIBLY LOVELY ask in! I CAN’T TELL YOU HOW EPIC IT TRULY IS, AT LEAST TO ME, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

Now I’m gonna be thinking about this FOREVER

(; ω ; )

I hope you’re having a WONDERFUL day or night, buddy! (ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ

[thelibraryoflazy]

Farewell, My Prologue

Thanks to this post and youtube slyly recommending me a bootleg of The Great Comet of 1812, I wrote an Ace Attorney song parody of “Prologue.” Unfortunately I don’t have enough people and musicians in my back pocket to take a stab at recording it, but here are my lyrics and original song for reference.

Enjoy!

PHOENIX:

There’s a man carrying out a plan somewhere

And Maya isn’t here

There’s a kidnapper hiding out there somewhere

And Maya isn’t here

 ALL:

There’s a man carrying out a plan somewhere

And Maya isn’t here

There’s a kidnapper hiding out there somewhere

And Maya isn’t here

And this is all in your record

You are at the courthouse

Gonna have to study up a little bit if you want to keep with the case

‘Cause it’s a complicated kind of murder

Everyone’s got five psyche locks

So look it up in your record

We’d appreciate it, thanks a lot

Da da da

Da da da

Da da da

Pearl!

PEARL:

Pearl Fey is young

She loves her cousin with all her heart

 ALL:

She loves her cousin with all her heart

Pearl is young

And Maya isn’t here

MIA:

Mia is good

Wright’s first advisor and brightest friend

 ALL:

Wright’s first advisor and brightest friend

Mia is good

Pearl is young

And Maya isn’t here

 MILES:

Miles is trusting, an old friend to Phoenix

The prosecution, he’s just arrived

 ALL: The prosecution, he’s just arrived

Miles is trusting

Mia is good

Pearl is young

And Maya isn’t here

 And this is all in your record

You are at the courthouse

Gonna have to study up a little bit if you want to keep with the case

‘Cause it’s a complicated kind of murder

Everyone’s got five psyche locks

So look it up in your record

We’d appreciate it, thanks a lot

Da da da

Da da da

Da da da

 Engarde!

 ENGARDE:

Matt Engarde is hot

He spends his money on murder and wine

 ALL:

He spends his money on murder and wine

Engarde is hot

Miles is trusting

Mia is good

Pearl is young

And Maya isn’t here

 DE KILLER:

De Killer is precise

Hired assassin, extraordinaire

 ALL:

Hired assassin, extraordinaire

De Killer is precise

Engarde is hot

Miles is trusting

Mia is good

Pearl is young

And Maya isn’t here

FRANZISKA:

Franziska is fierce, and harsh with the foolish

Quick with a whip, and perfect at law

 ALL:

Quick with a whip, and perfect at law

Franziska is fierce

De Killer is precise

Engarde is hot

Miles is trusting

Mia is good

Pearl is young

And Maya isn’t here

 Miracles and evidence, do we still have the time?!

Our Witnesses!

 ADRIAN:

Adrian Andrews is anxious

 GUMSHOE:

And Gumshoe is brave

 ADRIAN AND GUMSHOE:

Testimonies, totally messed up

 OLDBAG:

And Oldbag’s just for fun!

ALL:

Oldbag’s just for fun!

Oldbag is fun

Adrian is anxious

Gumshoe is brave

Franziska is fierce

De Killer is precise

Engarde is hot

Miles is trusting

Mia is good

Pearl is young

And Maya isn’t here

 And what of Phoenix Wright?

Dear, bewildered, and hardly alright

What of Phoenix Wright?

Scared, determined, and fighting for time

What of Phoenix Wright?

What of Phoenix Wright?

What of Phoenix Wright?

And now for my commentary because I worked hard and want to write my own retrospective. If I could put a read more UNDERNEATH a read more, I would.

The original joke I made half an hour into an eight hour work shift was “And Miles isn’t here.” About twenty seconds later the weight of “Maya isn’t here” hit me, and I spent the next seven and a half hours trying to write this song parody and work at the same time (and worked more on it on and off for the next four days). I nearly changed course while thinking about the entire musical as a whole because the idea of disbarred Phoenix singing “I used to be better” is deeply upsetting. Since my gateway song was Dust and Ashes, I also considered going the Rise From the Ashes route, but ultimately kept on with Farewell, My Turnabout. Something about this musical and Farewell, My Turnabout just feels right to me.

I couldn’t find anything as succinct as ‘There’s a war going on out there somewhere’ so I settled for changing the lyric a few times. I considered making all four different, but I liked having the whole company echo Phoenix’s lines back to him. Also, most of my other takes were goofy. “There’s a cat making noise in a house somewhere” and “There’s a bear with a lens in it’s eye somewhere” felt a shade out of place (though the dream of sticking the line “Stuffed bear snatched up by Edgeworth” into this musical remains. Don’t let me take on this project). I also had “There’s a blackmail tape out there somewhere” which I do like but I feel that it’s a bit too specific for this intro.

I like how the name sequence wound up. Maya, Pearl, Mia felt appropriate. Mia was a tricky one to write because the names Natasha, Anatole, and Pierre are all HORRIBLE to work around, but I kept her description as good because she fits any definition of the word. Pearl loving Maya very much felt like a very sweet, natural fit. I stand by my decision even if loving one’s cousin makes half the internet think of the ‘localization choices’ of a certain Sailor Moon dub.

Miles is a grande dame of Moscow in part because I wanted more syllables to work with, but I also like having him a little earlier in the song to mark his importance. I left writing his piece to last because it deviated a huge amount from the original text and I also wasn’t sure where to begin. And yet, after all that consideration, I decided to make fun of him instead by drawing attention to how he’s ‘just arrived.’ Rude.

I considered keeping old-school because... it’s not wrong? What are you even wearing around your neck, Miles (and where can I get one)? A friend of mine who is partway through Rise From the Ashes suggested ‘fuchsia’ and while that is absolutely hilarious, I did already make fun of Miles once. Twice, if we count ‘and Miles isn’t here.’ I went with trusting for a few reasons. One is that this is the first time we see him talking about pursuing the truth. And he really, really, TRUSTS in that. He smiles so much in the scene where he first comes back? I had forgotten? Just how much? That’s not entirely relevant, I’m just overwhelmed because I watched that earlier. We also see him trusting in other people much more readily than before, and trust in general is a big deal in this case. Phoenix TRUSTS HIM?! OOPS I MADE THIS ABOUT NARUMITSU.

Matt Engarde’s part wrote itself (as did the chorus, oh my god. It wanted to be written). De Killer, on the other hand? THE WORST. I had more trouble with his part than anybody’s. It’s partly because his name is KILLER and assassin is so many syllables and good synonyms are hard to come by and I couldn’t make hitman work and the names Anatole and Pierre had the nerve to be in the line originally. But, I won. Take that!

Franziska had to be fierce. I wanted to use “Franziska is fierce and always perfect” because perfect has to be somewhere and I think Dolokhov’s original line about not being too important would be truly insulting to her (Show him how it’s done, Franziska). Unfortunately, I was having trouble with her second line, so I swapped things around a bit.

I threw out ‘minor characters’ in favor of ‘our witnesses’ so even though I think Gumshoe is good, ‘Gumshoe is brave’ is probably the best sentence I’ve ever written in my life. Adrian Andrews is anxious because co-dependant is a lot of syllables, and I think it’s fair to say she’s got a lot of anxiety. I feel, really, really bad that I couldn’t fit Will Powers in. I ran out of room.

Now you might be saying, “Objection! Oldbag isn’t fun!” And you would be right. It makes me laugh because CAPCOM thinks Oldbag is for fun. Why else would she be in so many games? I considered making the line “And Corrida is dead!” but ultimately decided to make the speaker a witness. And the tone doesn’t quite suit Will Powers, he’s a bit shy for the last rousing call. I’m sorry, WP.

And what of Phoenix Wright? Goodness, that was a near save. The stresses on Pierre don’t fit anything! I did originally want to keep the line “Dear, bewildered, and awkward’ intact by adding ‘at times’ to the end, but then when I went for ‘fighting for time’ in the other line, I switched out awkward. Writing that last bit about Phoenix made me emotional. I love him.

And that’s Farewell, My Prologue!