#also experiencing mum with my mom was indescribable
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redrattlers · 6 months ago
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feeling so emotional after the most fun wonderful and healing weekend 🥹
#i say weekend but it’s more the last couple days#slowly starting to process luke’s show on thursday and truly just feeling so much#the songs i hadn’t heard at boston calling were coincidentally the ones i was the most excited to hear and ahhh it was incredible#like place in me and comedown and i’m still your boy#i have no words#also!! motion!!#i did not expect to leave that show and have motion be one of my favourite moment of the night#it had been so long since i had so much fun in a crowd everyone was so hype<3#the pure joy i felt in that moment and how that was reciprocated by the people around me#priceless#starting line<3 still can’t believe i got to hear my favourite song in the world<3#fun fact i went to the show with my mom after my friend couldn’t go anymore#her coming to my rescue when i was starting to have doubts about going alone<3#and she loved it so much 😭#guys i love my mom#we made a whole weekend out of it and it was so nice#when i say this whole experience was so healing that’s part of it#to like have this much fun and to share that with my mom meant so much more to me than i realized#she knows wfttwtaf well and it was so cute to see her excited when she recognized a song 😭#also experiencing mum with my mom was indescribable#i just hugged her the whole time and kinda blacked out actually#so yeah!!!! this show turned out to be so much more than i could ever imagined#super happy with my experience with this tour and choosing to do boston calling and a show too#i can’t even talk about luke he was so perfect<3#more thoughts on this later when i reblog things probably
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queerchoicesblog · 4 years ago
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After The Storm
Folks, here’s the second suggestion (thanks a mill @scottishqueer) for the wlw writing project. Inspo is fleaky lately but I want everyone who sent ideas to know that I’m working on them: I’m just a bit slow to write! But I hope you will enjoy this.
A little note about this series set in the Italian Renaissance. I chose a location very dear to me and - hopefully - a bit unusual: Ferrara, the city where my grandparents lived and my mom was born. I love that place and I’ll probably go back there in August: I still remember my grandpa taking me to the Castle (I have a picture showing little me proudly sitting on a pile of cannonballs in the internal stone garden on a sunny day), the Cathedral and the palaces around town. I incorporated them all in the story.
Ferrara was also one of the capitals of the Italian Renaissance, a Duchy ruled by the House of Este, a princely family, linked with several contemporary royal dynasties, including the British royal family. They were notorious patrons of the arts and innovators (through architeractural projects like the one called “Addizione” they were precursors of modern city planning); Duke Alfonso, who makes a cameo in the story and was the third husband of the infamous Lucrezia Borgia, was a patron of Ariosto, a famous poet to whom - ironically - my high school was dedicated. So yeah, I added a personal to this miniseries.
If you do happen to like this miniseries, please consider spreading the word!
Previous series: Ancient Greece
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The rain has finally subsided. When I wake up at the very first lights of dawn, only a faint rattling against the windows can be heard, a testament to the storm an unkind wind blew from where the sea lays and roars. I cherish the feeling, the newfound sweet peace after the howling winds of the night. My beautiful little boy is resting by my side. My poor Tommaso: my little angel has been unwell for days, I have never seen him shed all those tears since the day he was born. He cried and cried until his screams of fear and pain were barely audible and none of us knew what to do. Even Riccardo, my ever-absent, ever-busy husband, worried and urged the presence of a physician with great haste, concern written all over his face. I've never seen him like that before. Tommaso is our only son, too beautiful and young to surrender to a hideous disease and leave this world. If I allow myself to dwell into these thoughts, oh that would be enough to kill me! Seeing my boy suffering was almost unbereable: his desperate cries pierced right through my heart as I held him close, impotent yet hopeful that my presence could provide him a little comfort. Mum is here, my love, fighting and suffering with you.
It's an indescribable joy and relief to wake up this morning and see him sleeping peacefully after the agony and the storm. Tommaso is afraid of thunders and dark skies, I hated the rainstorm for being so unmerciful and throwing new fears to my troubled little prince. I wish I could have blown it away like Aeolus but I do not detain such power over the natural elements.
I gently stroke his head, a feather touch: God forbid I wake him! I almost cry but I manage to refrain myself: my sobbing could disturb his heavenly slumber and I don't want him to see me crying. I'll greet him with a smile when his eyes open up again and nuzzle his belly before covering him with kisses from head to toe. Tommaso loves it and I'm sure Riccardo won't object for once, not after what we've been through. I really thought I would lose my angel.
Thankfully, Lady Death spared him or so it seems. When he wakes he looks back to his usual self, no sign of the cruel pain torturing him. He gets all happy and excited underneath my kisses and eats with a good appetite. He simply looks a bit more abashed and tired than usual but it's understandable. I'll follow the physician's advice and ask my maid to get eggs and cook one of those soups and creams I had too when I was recovering from giving birth. That will hopefully help.
Seeing him happy again makes me forget about the events and mundane meetings I have missed over the past few days since he got ill. I love attending them but it all became suddenly so meaningless when my son lost his light and health. I must remember to save a prayer and make an offering for his miraculous recovery. And I can get the report of the latest happenings at court from my dear friends. They sent notes inquiring about Tommaso and I am glad to let them know the fortunate turn of events.
They visit me the day after. I have many friends here but Maria and Virginia are special companions to me. Maria is the oldest of the group, she has two sons already in marital age, but she has been good to me since I first walked into the castle. She comes from one of the wealthiest noble families in town: she's an institution at court and it meant so much to me that she took me under her wing when I was the new girl here, the young bride of "the most skilled diplomat that has ever served the House of Este". She has her ideas and a temper, of course, we don't agree on everything but she's been a sort of mentor to me and I will always be grateful to her for that: all I know about properly living at court, well I owe it to her. Virginia is about my age, another "pupil" of Maria. I like her: she's a bit shier and meeker than our friend and she has a little boy too so I'm sure she fully understood my anguish.
Apparently, I didn't miss anything important as I guarded Tommaso with my life. Same old rivalries between dames, the yet unconfirmed gossips about the Duke marriage plans, how displeased the jealous favourite looked even if she denied her irritation. Good old court life. I comment that there is still so much going on in our fair Ferrara: the Addizione is proceeding and rumour has it, the palace the previous Duke commissioned for court entertainments, Palazzo Schifanoia, is being renewed and expanded. It goes without saying that it is bound to be a work of unprecedented beauty. I don't remember who was saying so but I know the Duke and his passion for the arts so I find it hard to doubt.
Virginia claps her hand and notes that actually yes, I missed something. Speaking of arts and artistic projects, do I remember when rumours of an external artist joining the enterprise spread? Well, it happened! Now, that I think about it, I remember...Riccardo mentioned it one night as we came back from a music gathering. Apparently, our most brilliant architect, Biagio Rossetti, the genius in charge of bringing the Duke's vision to life and into art, requested another artist to join his brigade. If I got it right, it should be a talented colleague from Florence, Sir Davide whatever...I forgot his surname. He served the House of Medici and excelled so brightly that our fair Biagio summoned him as his right hand. Allegedly, our architect - or , God forbid!, the Duke himself - is unsatisfied with how the projects are proceeding and firmly believes that a fresh set of eyes and hands will benefit the future glory of our Duchy.
"The new architect arrived - when was it? Oh yes, the day after you informed us that poor Tommaso was ill, you definitely missed" Virginia explains.
He looks nice: a handsome man, who knows how to behave himself at court, a true gentleman. I tease my friend asking if she has already put her eyes on him. Virginia blushes a little before protesting: of course not, she would never do anything like that, not to her Carlo, she's a married woman and loyal. Maria interrupts her.
"Oh stop it: as if that would be an impediment!"
"Well, ideally it is!"
"Yes, but only ideally, as you said" Maria laughs. "My young girl, you should know that everyone at court has affairs sooner or later. We'll get you a lover too one day"
"Maria, you're incorrigible!" Virginia giggles, pretending a shyness that is no longer there, replaced by a hint of mischief.
Maria just shrugs, picking up a cherry from the bowl my maid laid on the table.
"Just experienced. So believe me when I tell you we all need the thrill of a secret affair in our lives...otherwise what is left to us? We would die of boredom!"
"I cannot vouch for Maria's theory but you said it yourself, the Florentine architect is here now and he's a handsome man..." I add, winking, to join the conversation.
"You'll vouch for my theory too, dove. Give me time and I'll get yourself a lover too" Maria exclaims.
"...Before a fair lady of the court catches his eyes and bewitches his heart" I continue, addressing Virginia as I prevent Tommaso from climbing up the table on his hunt for cherries.
My friends exchange an amused look.
"Oh but he's married, Emilia!" Virginia explains. "He didn't travel alone, his wife followed him here too. We met them both"
Ah, that's unexpected! I have already pictured a handsome bachelor joining our court but that's good to hear. As much as I enjoy the company of my friends and the other dames, I have noticed though the years that new companions are a blessing. A little novelty, even if momentary at times, could have the same effect of fresh air on a hot summer day. Otherwise, we would die of boredom, as Maria said, referring to lovers. I wouldn't go that far but a new lady in town could be good news.
"Oh, nice! A potential new friend. We should invite her to join our next sewing meeting and get to know her. As well as the hottest gossips from Florence, that is! What do you think?" I smile.
Surprisingly, the expression on my friends' faces is unreadable. Did I say something wrong? Was I too straightforward? Oh gosh, I hope they didn't take my enthusiasm as personal displeasure of our sewing meetings or their company! I better get this right.
"So, how's the new lady?" I inquiry nonchalantly as I prove myself in the funniest faces I can master to make my child laugh.
I succeed: Tommaso claps his tiny hands and laughs until he's out of breath.
"Oh, don't even get me started with her!" Maria dismisses my question but I know her long enough to know she can't wait to tell me what she thinks and maybe more.
"Nothing much, she keeps to herself. Not quite the talker" Virginia shrugs.
"Ah, she's way more tolerable when she keeps her mouth shut anyway!" Maria intervenes again and I'm sure she's not done with just that.
"My my, it seems you took quite a dislike for her" I giggle, exchanging an amused look with Virginia.
"I couldn't help myself, my dear" Maria continues, fanning herself as if to cool down her mounting anger. "Another boorish yet arrogant Florentine"
"The Florentine are always so full of themselves" I concede, cradling my son in my arms.
"Then she must be the Queen of them all" Maria barks a throaty laughter. "She looks so...so high and almighty: 'oh no, I'm afraid we don't play this game in Florence', 'I don't know what it means, we don't have this word in Florence', 'Florence here and that'. Believe me, sweetheart, we were trying to be kind to her but she's impossible! She acts like royalty but she's the wife of an...architect"
She pronounces the last words with evident displease. I can't refrain laughter: she's always been such a snob! I comment that she certainly sounds like...something.
"Oh but you'll have the disgrace to meet her soon enough!" Maria exclaims. "You know that our Duke is so fond of artists, he will certainly invite them again at the next dinners and balls"
"Speaking of the ball" Virginia intervenes to prevent her from keeping ranting. "What will you wear at the Masquerade Ball next month? I ordered a most extravagant costume yesterday, I can't wait to show you-"
We spend the rest of the afternoon discussing the upcoming events at court and the latest trends, gossiping about what we suspect the other dames will wear.
Ah, I missed my friends and our conversations...
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tiredmumsclub-blog · 7 years ago
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Melanie @mothermelaniemiles from Surrey, UK 🇬🇧 is mum to 1 x boy 👶 (6 weeks old). _ _ ONE THING THAT YOU'RE PROUD/HAPPY ABOUT SINCE BECOMING A MOTHER? "Being lucky enough to actually have my beautiful son in front of me, I still have to pinch myself and just can't stop staring at him. There are a lot of struggles around at the moment for young women to  conceive and so I feel extremely grateful and thankful to have this miracle creation in my arms, it's an indescribable love." _ _ ONE THING YOU WOULD LIKE TO CHANGE ABOUT YOURSELF SINCE BECOMING A MOTHER? "I haven't been a mother all that long yet so this is hard to say but I want to ensure that I am the best mother I can possibly be for my son, without forgetting that I am also a wife!!" _ _ WHAT DO YOU DREAM ABOUT DOING MOST? "Creating a happy family and exploring and experiencing lots of new things in life with them. I would love to move to the country and live on or near a farm one day with fresh air and rolling hills and my family and friends around me." 💪😴👶💜 _ _ FIND US ON FACEBOOK INSTAGRAM TWITTER AND TUMBLR #tiredmumsclub #tiredmomsclub #thisiswhoiam #thisiswhosheis #mum #mom #mama #maman #mumlife #momlife #stronglikeamother #worldwide #surrey #mumoftheday #momoftheday #thefutureisfemale #motherhood #mumsclub #momsclub #matriarchy #mumsofinstagram #momsofinstagram #instamum #instamom #instagram #proudmum #proudmom #shootermag (at Surrey)
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