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yoonieper · 2 years ago

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BTS Dynamic Breakdown & 1k Celebration

Hello everyone! This is a semi-detailed guide to certain dynamics and some kinks I think BTS might have. These are just my own personal observations and ideas I have after stanning the group for the last 5 years! This is all purely speculation!

I approached this more like a research topic than anything too sexy so I’m sorry friends idk what happened lol (but y’all know me, there is some spice ;D)~ For explaining my points I’m using a scale me and my sister came up with years ago. It’s really dumb (once you see the name it’s even dumber) but it’s something I keep in mind to this day whenever I write smut! I guess this can clue you guys into my methodology, and maybe if you’re a smut writer as well or even if you have an active imagination like I do this might help you with any head cannons you might create!

I've been sitting on this since August last year so finally glad to have this out :') Please don't mind any mistakes or anything, finishing this up took some rushing so I promise to make things a little neater when I have more time~

This unexpectedly also turned into a 1K celebration 😧… I have lots of plans for upcoming fics and I hope to celebrate properly with you guys soon! Love you guys so, so much and thank you for all the love you’ve been showing during my time here on tumblr 🥹~ Please go ahead and leave suggestions for mtls, imagines, reactions, or anything like this post! Like I said I have some plans (hehe keep an eye out) but I’ll try and do these quick posts in between to celebrate even harder for the occasion!

THIS BREAKDOWN IS QUICK AND EXTREMELY SUMMARIZED!!! Eventually I might post a full breakdown of the scale!

Category Breakdown:

Sub (0-10%): Likes to give up pretty much all control (an extreme end). If lower than 5% likely to be associated with some type of trauma— likely to want to be submissive 24/7. 6-10% likely have some type of subspace.

Bottom (10-30%): Likes to give up control but not completely opposed to topping.

Switch (30-70%): Likely to travel into top or bottom categories depending on the situation, control is less important depending on placement, pretty flexible on the scale.

Top (70-90%): Likes to be in control, but is not opposed to bottoming occasionally.

Dom (90-100%): Likes to be in control pretty much all the time. If higher than 95% likely to be associated with some type of trauma— likely to want to be dominant 24/7. 90-94% range from typical hard doms to soft— ex masters/dominatrixes.

Kinky Island (outliers of the data): For certain reasons they do not fit the traditional format of the scale. Will go into more information in a future breakdown!

Vocab:

Point of Reference: This is the exact percentage on where you place someone on the scale. This point is used for determining their range. Consider this the “average” of their range.

Range: Sex always isn’t consistent, but there is a typical range no matter the situation. Based on “personal” data (such as possible kinks, preferences, lifestyle, partner’s data, etc), shows the likely dynamic push and pull this person is willing to undergo.

__-leaning: Whether they are on the top or bottom half of that category.

Important note:

The way to use the scale… you put the person you’re analyzing on the right side of the scale and their partner on the left. For ideal matches their points of reference and ranges should be relatively close to each other or only slightly intersect. The further apart or the more the points intersect likely indicate a incompatible sexual match.

Here’s a diagram I made for some extra help! Those marked in green are ok matches and those marked in red are likely incompatible.

Now onto the fun~

Kim Seokjin:

68%— switch, top-leaning with a range of top and bottom

Ideal Partner Range: 30-75%

Ok so honestly it was only recently that I feel like I got an idea of where Seokjin might lie on the scale. Seokjin I don’t think was as obvious for me as some of the other members but I think I got an idea now! He’s a hard guy to analyze, especially about a topic like this, he’s just harder to observe.

There are a lot of assumptions about him, that he’s vanilla per say and I would like to counter this argument. This is where the top leaning side of his range comes in. Seokjin is the type that likes to take over during casual sex. Early mornings before he needs to leave, he’ll get on top of you and fuck you so you’ll miss him all day. In very casual scenarios he likes to lead, likes to be on top. He loves the way you grasp his broad shoulders, loves your moans. He’s a very laid back top. I don’t think he would possess too many kinks that lie in the top or dom range. He is just a natural lead, but well he’s still a switch.

This is where it gets interesting. If your times line up in the day and you actually have time to just... fuck, a different side of Seokjin comes out. He has mentioned that he enjoys being choked and tied up in the casual joking sense, but the jokes had a pattern that to some point there might be some truth behind his laughs. I think if the day and time allows it he wants to be fucked. I wouldn’t necessarily say he’s a sub, his range doesn’t go that far, but I think he just wants to be played with. Likes to see how much fun you can have with his body. It may even be a way he fuels that top-leaning side of himself.

This man would have a subtle praise kink. Not as big as you think Mr. WWH would have but it’s definitely there. He finds a lot of pleasure in knowing how much you enjoy his body and how much you love him. Wouldn’t really ask you to say it, but would definitely tell you how much he loves it. I don’t think any of his kinks are too extreme. He never dips into dom or sub territory (his range again, doesn’t permit that). I think he’s more so for soft, feelily sex (that romantic shit) on a normal basis but likes to have fun here and there.

I think Seokjin would be slow getting to this point in the relationship though. He’s a lot like Yoongi in that regard, in that I think it would take him a while to even catch feelings. Even in an adorable friends to lovers scenario, he would be slow moving in trying anything with you. I think he’s modest and traditional in the sense that he prefers to wait a little while before taking that step.

I do think the dynamics would change if he was with a guy— his point of reference might cement itself in the top or bottom category, depending on his partner’s point of reference!

His ideal off day:

You spend the entire day doing cute domestic things together, like cooking and doing laundry. You take a break in between playing games and somehow playing Mario Odyssey ends in a whole debate about who’s really better at games. The match got a little too heated so you both ended up cuddling up as you watched all 11 seasons of the Walking Dead (you made it through 3).

The sun eventually sets and your cuddling session ends up getting quite handsy. You finally have enough and bring him to the bedroom, tie him up and have your way with him. You’d have your hands around his throat as he eventually fills you up with his cum.

“So pretty, you always make me feel so good…” You sigh, seeing the way his eyes rolled back in pleasure and hearing his soft sighs of relief.

◈ ━━━━━━━ ◆ ━━━━━━━ ◈

Min Yoongi:

27%— bottom, top-leaning with a range of switch and top

His ideal Partner Range: 60-80%

Oh boy oh boy, this is gonna be fun >:)

Bottom Yoongi agenda stans rise please! Yoongi to me has the lowest point of reference of any member of bts. But well it’s a little complicated lol. See the thing about Yoongi… I honestly don’t think this man can dom like some of y’all want him to. Yoongi has been a person I’ve seen written with some of the most extremist, darkest kinks given to him. Now let me rant a bit. I hope this doesn’t stem from the fact that Yoongi has this stereotype of being the “savage and cold” member because as most of you should know that ain’t it my friends. YOONGI IS A BIG SOFTY THAT JUST WANTS LOVE. This man is not the dom you’re looking for. His range I don’t think could ever really reach dom levels. He can move to a top-leaning switch but that’s only if his partner is more sub-leaning.

This man just wants to be cared for and taken care of. I wouldn’t necessarily call it a subspace but I think something that Yoongi would appreciate with a partner is just being cared for. He works hard all day long and comes home and wants to be loved. He wants to let go of all his worries and just let you have your fun with him.

Yoongi though, I don’t think he would necessarily be a subway sandwich that can go to <10%. The OSS Scale is based on control and Yoongi would like to give it, but he isn’t a major sub in the sense— especially revolving around kinks, he’s more laid back. He’s a bottom, meaning he more so prefers being in that position, and giving his partner most of the control. I will say though that he can top slightly in that sense— when needed he can step up to the plate (if you’re tired etc).

I feel like this might potentially be a deal breaker in the question of a long lasting relationship. Yoongi can top occasionally but again he prefers letting someone else take control. He wouldn’t want this to be a dealbreaker, but subconsciously, if he was with a more sub-leaning switch, he would get a bit exhausted and would not be completely satisfied as far his sex life would go.

Yoongi is another fucks with feelings type of guy, but like on crack or sumn. He to like you in order for him to have any type of sexual feelings. Yoongi in those interviews where they would be asked about romantic relationships, he would always emphasize feelings. I’ll go more into this when I do a gen relationship breakdown but Yoongi is an emotional guy.

I honestly don’t think he’ll be that interested in rough kinky sex (not to say it won’t happen). He considers sex to be an intimate thing between two people who really like each other and is more into passion than just hardcore sex. Not fucking, but a making love type guy. I feel his kinks might lean that way too. He prefers things that heighten the intimacy. Something I feel might be on that list is coming inside~ The connotation that it traditionally has, makes it that much more special when you get to that point in your relationship. Not necessarily an impreg kink but a form of closeness, passion, and trust that comes with it. High key also think he’d love to watch it drip out of you because hghhh it’s hot.

Would the dynamic change if he was with the guy? Yoongi would just become slightly more sub-leaning but I don’t believe there would be too much difference :)

An ideal day off:

Coming home from a long day of work to your loving embrace. You eat dinner together, food courtesy of you, and it’s delicious because you’re amazing. You talk and laugh the whole night and Yoongi just stares at you with so much adoration in his eyes, because he just loves you so much. Eventually you both end up back in bed and he shyly pulls you close, his hands running over your skin and gently pulling at your clothes. You pick up on the hint and straddle his lap.

“Is this what you want?” You lightly tease as he subtly tries to get your hips to move.

“Please…” He looks up at you with pleading eyes, but they trail down to focus on your lips.

And you give him exactly what he wants because how could you deny him when he looks at you like that.

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Jung Hoseok

73%— top, bottom-leaning with a range of switch and dom (possible member of kinky island)

Ideal Partner Range: 25-45%

Alright alright… Jung Hoseok. Ok so lots of thoughts have come to mind about Hoseok. This boy I think would be a comfortable top in most scenarios. I propose he might be a possible member of kinky island because like a lot of people seem to agree, Hoseok might be so kinky that it causes his dynamics to dip outside of his range.

For causal scenarios he’s a top, but bring out the box of toys it’s kinda up in the air. I don’t think he would have too much of a problem letting you try things on him and he’d let you take the reins when you asked. But I think Hoseok would look for a sub-leaning switch or bottom, so that wouldn’t really happen too often.

Anywayyy the toys. So he would not be opposed to being experimental, but I feel like in contrast with Jungkook he might be a bit more selective in what he actually ends up liking.

I feel like Hoseok can be pretty causal about sex. As you read or have read already, some of the other boys might hold sex up to a certain standard or how they can only do it with people that they care about. Hoseok, I don’t think he would be the same.

Does he like romantic sex? Of course he does, why wouldn’t he? Buuttt I just don’t think he necessarily cares about it compared to the same degree as others. This man is the perfect guy for your playboy aus alright (plus Jimin). Wouldn’t be opposed to just having causal sex— quick hook ups, maybe even a fuck buddy situation.

My man likes to have fun and being in a relationship or not isn’t going to stop him hehe. Again he still values that connection— might even long for it at times, but it’s just not necessary.

Sex with Hoseok would be pretty fun and he’d make sure to make it a blast for the both of you. He’s a cutie and I love him :3

With a guy Hobi might cement himself as a top (possibly?), but I don’t see any of his placements changing too much!

His ideal scenario:

You and him break out the “toy chest” and do your favorite things with each other.

“So how do you feel about…” Hoseok searched through the box for a good one. His eyes picked up on one towards the bottom he recognized you both haven’t pulled out in a while. He pulled it out and looked at your shocked expression.

“Too much prep time, need something a little quicker.” You say from over on the bed. Hoseok nodded, putting the 12 inch dildo back in chest.

“Alrrrighhttt, what about…” He continued to search and his eyes lit up when he finally spotted what he had in mind originally.

He pulled it out and he saw the gleam in your eyes as well. Hitachi wand it is then.

Hoseok teased you a little bit, but your begging was enough to get him to turn up the settings. Using the wand, a favorite toy of you both, he made you cum till you got dizzy and you happily took over afterward and before he knew it the wand, your hand, and your face was covered in his cum.

It surely was a beautiful sight to see :)

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Kim Namjoon

81%— top, no lean with a range of dom and switch

Ideal Partner Range: 20-35%

Ooo ok Namjoon! Let’s go with this one yall >:)

Alrighty, Namjoon to me is definitely a top no doubt about it. I will fight people on the fact that I don’t think he’s a major hard dom. Some of y’all might have thought I would put his placement higher on the scale, but I honestly don’t think Namjoon would be able to place himself that high.

He’s a lot more of a softy than what some people might expect. In his sex life it would be the same. Yes he enjoys control, but any of those contributing factors that I think would push Namjoon over the edge for a placement of dom, for the average, I don’t think he would go that high most of the time.

Top is a comfortable place for him and I don’t think he would have any particular lean. That will likely be how sex is a majority of time— whether a quickie or long drawn out sessions.

As far as the kink department goes— I feel like Joon might also be similar to Yoongi in the sense he looks for more intimacy, ways he can feel closer to you. I feel like he would be a bit particular with what he likes. Something that just came to mind recently is eye contact. I feel like he’d really enjoy looking into your eyes as he is buried deep inside you as you moan and plead for him.

I also do feel like Joon could potentially dip into switch territory… I feel like Joon is high enough as a top that there would be a bit of opposition. It wouldn’t be extreme, a bit of hesitation, but it wouldn’t be too hard to convince him to let you take the reins for once.

Joon could also dip into dom, but I feel like this wouldn’t happen often, even less than him going into switch territory. These times are for special occasions or emotions that could possibly fuel him into going past his range. Namjoon though is not a hard dom and would not be able to go that high. His range at the highest might be up to 93%.

I feel like sex for Joon is more of a stress relief thing in the more casual sense. Of course he prefers being in a relationship rather than all the hassle of bringing someone who he hardly knows every time, but my man has a whole lot of weight on his shoulders and he needs something to take that out on.

Joon’s dynamics might be a little more solidified if he was with a guy, but placement likely wouldn’t change too much!

His ideal day off:

You both had been making out on the couch. Lips hastily moved against each other and Namjoon’s hands ran over your skin, but found home right on your ass. You had no idea what happened, you both had been talking about this new book he was reading. He looked so cute in his hoodie and glasses, the minute Joon flashed you that adorable dimpled grin while he talked about something important, suddenly you’re on his lap needing this man inside.

Your desperate act at getting him close certainly worked fast, Joon was struggling to breath and his mind ran a 100 miles an hour trying to keep up with your lips and taking in the fact you were on his lap and felt so good against him.

The situation got a little too intense and Joon hastily whisked you away to your shared room. Before both of you knew what was going on he was buried deep inside you while he stared into your eyes as you cried out his name.

“I love you…” He moaned, he was getting close.

You didn’t say anything at first, instead pulling him close, needing him close.

“Love you too Joon…”

◈ ━━━━━━━ ◆ ━━━━━━━ ◈

Park Jimin

90%— dom, bottom-leaning with a range of top

Ideal Partner Range: 8-25%

Alright y’all can fight me on this BUT JIMIN IS A DOM NO QUESTIONS!!! I stand by this one yall.

I’ve observed Jimin a lot and I can not for the life of me place him in any type of submissive scenario. Like guys… He isn’t a hard dom, unless under the right conditions, but he will have your knees weak and you can’t help but fall into submission the minute he’s got you under his spell. I feel his point of reference wouldn’t be able to go too much higher since he’s near the end of the scale. 94% might even be pushing it. His range I feel would dip into top and that’s where he’ll likely reside a lot of the times during casual sex.

But Jimin, he ain’t no sub y'all I’m sorry. I've watched clips and things over the years and I would love to pull up some of them to show y’all but tumblr has a limit of how much I could post so :,(…. It’s the way he speaks, carries himself, and just things that he’s said about his ideal type that lead me to believe he is likely to take charge.

Jimin I feel like would have a lot of top to dom kinks. Something I feel pretty strongly about is him being a brat tamer.

… picture it yall.

Jimin I feel like he would be with someone with a little spice, would be the type to bite back. Probably lots of playful banter, maybe even enemies to lovers, but oohohohohohoh, the minute y’all take that step in your relationship he would love nothing more than to get you on your knees and shut you up with his cock.

Jimin wouldn’t want an obedient sub, he gets off so much on getting you to behave. Wants you to talk shit, wants you to be bad just so he can punish you later. OHHHH he would love punishments. Loves a spicy relationship, if it’s too flat he gets bored.

Jimin would have this control on you that even if you’re riding him or something I feel he would still be in control and he would get you to listen. Would make you go a certain speed and with enough *cough cough* persuasion, you would do as he liked.

Honestly for Jimin I feel like he would be able to be with a person as high as a bottom leaning switch. Switches are pretty flexible so his partner would eventually settle into a bottom role, so that’s not too much of a big deal to him. Just know at the end of the day who’s in charge.

Jimin’s more of a soft dom to me at least in comparison to hard doms, Jimin’s not too intense. Also likes to just make love here and there, when he’s in his feels. He’s a big cutie too and the best with aftercare after sessions.

Jimin would be into LONG sex sessions, especially when he’s playing with you. He likes to fuck and will do quickies when it’s a must, but loves to take his time and have some fun.

OH AND THIS BOY’S PRAISE KINK YALL!!! Gosh yep please please tell him how good he makes you feel. Would definitely ask you to do it and that reassurance gets him off so much ooooo please do it.

Jimin is also your ideal guy for your playboy aus, like Jimin ain’t a fuck boy or anything but he definitely likes to have fun. Feel like this man just enjoys sex whether that be in a relationship or not, he’ll still do it. For him, it might just be stress relief or “it feels so good” type of thing, either way it’s not too big of a deal for him when he’s feeling needy to go out and invite someone new into his bed. He’s shy, but that’s his charm, and boy, to be charmed by Jimin in person! Your clothes are off before he can even say hello!

I feel like the dynamic wouldn’t change too much if he was with a guy!

His ideal day off:

Jimin was a little shocked to come home after a night out with friends and find all the lights in the apartment turned off. Eventually he made his way to the bedroom and he was in for a major shock seeing the bed covered with rose petals and you laying there with your sexy black lingerie.

Jimin is stunned and you laugh at his reaction.

“What’re you staring at?” You teased.

“What do you mean what am I staring at…” He chuckled, already starting to take off his clothes.

“I mean what I said, you seem to be in a rush for something.” You eyed him up and down as he climbed onto the bed.

“Mmmm, if that’s how you want to be, I’ll make sure you know what I’m looking at.” His laugh was dark, he had a lot in store for you.

He tackled you in kisses and made you came so many times on his tongue as you cried out his name.

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Kim Taehyung

74%— top, bottom-leaning with a range of switch

Ideal Partner Range: 25-35%

Ok yall I’ma be honest. Taehyung is a HUGE mystery. He’s honestly the member that I have yet to have a firm placement on the scale. I would honestly love to hear your opinions about Taehyung because this is really just purely speculation (with evidence and clips if possible)!

So I think Tae’s a top, a pretty casual one too. I feel like when Tae’s in a relationship he takes this like, protector role. He falls into the top category pretty naturally, but he is easily able to dip into switch, and it doesn’t really take much persuasion whatsoever.

I feel like with kinks Tae might be a bit of a wild card. He’s another intimacy guy, but there’s something that I feel like might come out of nowhere. It might not be at all anywhere near his range, but I feel like Tae would be the type to have some sort of weird kink he needs to sit you down and tell you one day. What this might be really could be anything, but if y’all have ideas I’d be down to hear them!

Anyway I don’t have too much to say about Taehyung as I never really was able to figure this boy out so I can’t give too much concrete evidence but he’s cute and I love him~

Taehyung can certainly play the part of a playboy, but irl I don’t really see it. Taehyung seems pretty romantic and I think he’d be similar to Jungkook in the regard that he prefers being in a relationship but it’s not a necessity. Like he might occasionally go out and find someone when he’s really desperate, but I feel like he’d have the most fun with someone close to him.

I feel like with a guy Taehyung could end up doing a complete dynamic switch potentially. He would either be about right where he is now, or might even dip into bottom territory. I feel like it would really depend on his partner’s preferences.

His ideal scenario:

The whole day was occupied by hosting a gathering with your closest friends and family at your place. It was long and the process of planning it, but it had been worth it in the end being able to see everyone have such a good time.

You and Taehyung had started a little bit of the cleanup process. It was only silence now but the joyous spirit of the event continued to linger.

You had managed to clean up the kitchen before suddenly Taehyung grabbed your hand and led you back to the bedroom. You were a little confused at first but the minute you were inside, suddenly he was pulling you close and pushing you down on the bed.

“Had some much fun today…” He sighed into your lips.

You couldn’t help but smile.

“Seeing all my family have fun together… so glad we decided to do this.” You weren’t sure if he knew exactly what he said and you tried to rule it off as just a hasty confession in a moment of passion, but that didn’t stop you eyes welling up slightly.

Family…

“Feeling really good today, you wanna try that thing?” He asked suddenly and you couldn’t be more excited.

Anything with your family.

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Jeon Jungkook

48%— switch, bottom-leaning with the range of top and bottom (possible member of kinky island)

Ideal Partner Range: 45-75%

Jungkook! Hehe ok so this boy is a lot. Jungkook has the potential of being a true switch which is why I think he might be a member of kinky island. But 48% I feel is a good place to put Jungkook. He’s bottom-leaning, which I feel is the best category for him.

I feel like Jungkook would prefer subbing. This is another case that I think that if his partner wasn’t high enough on the scale, he wouldn’t be able to be satisfied. I feel like this might be even greater than Yoongi, he needs that. Jungkook’s point of reference is higher on the scale than Yoongi but this is where the major divide happens.

Jungkook to me might be the kinkiest member of bts. Jungkook would have no hesitancy experimenting, always bringing new things into your relationship. In contrast with Hoseok, I feel like Jungkook would actually have a pretty big repertoire of things that he’d be into. Hoseok’s a bit more selective, but I feel like the list might be small of things he wouldn’t be into or at least willing to try.

Jungkook’s range is A LOT more sub-leaning, stretching even farther than Yoongi. Another reason he might be an outlier is the fact that Jungkook might even dip into the sub category. He loves to be controlled, worked, and pushed. This is where Jungkook finds the most satisfaction when it comes to sex. This evidence isn’t too far fetched when you consider some of the things he’s said himself or the members have mentioned.

I do, however, still feel like he’s a switch and can go as far as top. I feel like this side might not come out as often but when it does… oh when it does. The cause might stem from something— he gets jealous, angry hate sex I feel wouldn’t be off the table, maybe he’s just feeling like a tease that particular day.

Because he loves to sub, he knows how to be the perfect top— would love to push you the way you always do to him. If he was jealous he would leave marks all over your body, making sure everyone everywhere knows that you’re his (would def get real soft afterward). Jungkook likes to top sometimes and this is why he’s not a bottom with Yoongi.

Jungkook’s kinks I feel would fall all over the scale, but a lot would be below 50%. Just something I feel like he’d likely be into is edging. I feel like I don’t need to explain that too much but yes, that’s very much his vibe. One more thing I'll talk about real quick is I feel like Jungkook would have a praise kink. It wouldn’t be the same as Jimin’s, would never really ask you to praise him but he would like it just as much as he does. Praise gets that boy going like no other, tell him he’s pretty or handsome and he’s putty, tell him no one can fuck you like he can, he’s going to make sure that’s right.

But Jungkook’s a big softy. He may be kinky but would love the soft intimate shit that has him teary eyed as he cums and tells you how much he loves you.

For causal sex I feel like dynamics might be less important to the both of you.

Lots of Jungkook’s information might be contradictory or there are too many variables in the question. His kinks, his position, there is lots of evidence that supports that he would be an outlier of the scale if this information was true. Jungkook is definitely the strongest candidate for Kinky island.

Jungkook is also a pretty big sex with feelings guy. I wouldn’t say it would be a necessity but a BIG preference for him. As most of you guys should know, Jungkook’s a hopeless romantic! Idk how someone that fine can be one of us, but Jungkook def gives me the vibe that he be daydreaming about relationship stuff on the reg (whether he’s in one or not). Super soft boy, please give him love >:O

If Jungkook was with a guy I feel like his point of reference might even cement itself in bottom territory— would definitely be looking for a top or maybe even a dom. Would still like to play around and top occasionally, but he would be more of a bottom even in casual sex.

His ideal scenario: Our boy is pretty sappy so he has two. ONE) You spend the whole day together and end up in each other’s arms just making sweet sweet love. TWO) The minute you both wake up you’re all over each other, spending the entire day trying out different things that interest you, can hardly put your clothes back on before you’re tearing them off again.

Your breathing was heavy as Jungkook rolled off of you. There was the third time today you ended up in this position. You had tried to go downstairs to get a drink of water, but you weren’t wearing any clothes and one look at your ass had Jungkook pulling you back down to the bed so he could take you all over again.

“You think I can get up this time?” You joked as you looked over at him. Jungkook looked back at you.

“I don’t think so…” Jungkook sounded just as out of breath as you were. You didn’t know whether he was joking or not.

“Jungkook, if you keep doing this, maybe I need to get you to behave. You won’t even let me leave to get water.” At the mention of the punishment, you got his attention all over and suddenly he was back on top of you again.

“Maybe I might need a better punishment and I’ll be good.” Jungkook knew what his words did to you, he knew what the words did to himself. Just the thought of you having your way with him, telling him how bad he’s been was a recipe to get him harder than a brick embarrassingly quick.

You thought about it, before you were pushing him off you and reaching for the nightstand to pull out your gear.

Maybe this time he’ll let you leave.

43 notes · View notes

covenofwives · 2 years ago

Note

Hi Coven! For the questions, how about 3, 9 + 10 for “The Blame Game”? (I think this is the most read fic on tumblr for me tbh I always go back to it)

Ah the Blame Game. I consider this my best fic yet. My classic, as it were.

3. What’s your favorite line of narration?

“Tell me who’s idea it was, or the Tickle Monster’s going to make a visit.” The Tickle Monster?! Dream almost wanted to laugh. Half over anticipation and half over how childish the threat was. A nervous giggle bubbled out his throat while George nearly screamed, falling into helpless cackles.

(this is also my bonus second fave) “Dream!” George screeched and suddenly Dream’s hoodie was yanked, near enough chocking him and pulling him back from the wall. He went to yell out, mad as he was about to break through, when he saw it. The ceiling of the room cracked and with the weak spot in the wall collapsed. Dream jumped back, pushing George with him to the back wall. The side of the room collapsed. Water rushed in for a moment before the walls caved in. It was like the room had folded in half. The opening was closed up, stopping the water rushing in, but trickles and a small stream was making it’s way in. The water had reached to their ankles, and slowly rising. “You nearly died!” George yelped. “That could have been you under that rubble!”

9. Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

Sort of, but also sort of not. The idea for this fic was locked in solid the only thing that would change of it was what exactly XD would save the two from. I had a few ideas for what adventures they could be going on before settling on an ocean monument. One idea I regret not using was Dream and George somehow sneaking through and making their way to the End Realm. They'd meet the Dragon totally unprepared but before she could kill them XD would save and get them out of there, then the fic would pretty much go on as usual. I think if I ever rewrote the fic I'd use that idea (or i'll save that idea for a future fic)

10. Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story?

Hehe. Well in full honesty it was Llama who chose the pairing for this fic. She sent me this wonderful concept in the first place and we both loved/love the XD/Dream/George pairing for fics. The simp trio hehe.

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skypied · 3 years ago

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⭐ 👀👀👀

oH mAn FuCk I have been thinking about this for hours and I am struggling to figure out something to talk about. I really wish I could talk about the long fic I’m drabbling on currently, because my mind has been on my mind that all week. It would have been easier with specific questions 😂

I think I’m gonna have to go with pretty general thoughts and some things that apply to several fics, because I don’t have any long thoughts about one specific I think. Unless I reread all to remember, and that’ll take hours, haha.

(also, this is me emptying my tumblr drafts of a lot of stuff I have considered posting but never done bc they’re all weird )

The official, my-personal-Luberto-cinematic-universe reason I so to speak always make them come several times, and/or Luca has an overstimulation kink, is as simple as being a person with a vulva who knows how hard it can be to get into it sometimes, and has experienced reading fic and the scenes being a little too short, and just beginning to get into it when they come. So I hope someone appreciates that hehehe

I am very anal and love research and stats and spreadsheets and knowing as much as possible and would honestly LOVE to put an anon poll or whatever on my fics to get stats on how many people have gotten off to them 😂 if i can’t touch hearts and parts irl, at least I’m doing it online, that warms my heart honestly.

Of all the 10s of ks of words I’ve written yet my favorite lines are always tags or a/ns like “ Today’s hyperspecific tag is: accidental marriage proposal by cock ring” and “ Not me waiting until they’re balls deep to drop my chubby Alberto headcanon in an attempt to Pavlov condition you into accepting the gospel “ and “alternate title: alberto learns the epic highs and lows of masturbation" and of course “Original Goat Characters”

Me: haha Alberto likes being bossed around in bed a lil :) My overthinking brain: Actually, as a fellow ADHDer who loves in acts of service, theres little i enjoy more than being told what to do in a clear way by someone i love. (My ideal relationship is honestly this picture of Ariana Grande with Pete Stevenson, in which I am Ariana.)

I almost always have to hit the brakes from making them have an argument! I’ve posted some of this in my cut footage posts, but like. They just are so argumentative! I can barely stop them! I really enjoy it, but sometimes it’s like “wait this is supposed to be sexy, I have to stop this now”

Not only am I always up for shamelessly stealing inspiration from a whole range of other places, I have begun stealing from myself. “Oh, wait, this is the same as in that fic, what did I use then?” but I’m hoping readers don’t know my 180k archive as well as I do and can connect the dots (only 90k are published oohhh I have way too many wips to finish)

I think that’s everything interesting I have to say for now!

Wait one more thing, esp since I posted a Cliff’s Edge snippet today.

I’m v happy about it having such good ratings on Ao3, and I know a lot of people are excited for the continuation. But I am struggling because it’s my least favorite fic. There’s kind of a cognitive dissonance for me with where I was as a writer when I started it, and where I am now. Especially with their characterizations. I can barely reread either chapter because I just... Am not very proud of them. I am pretty far along in chapter 3! But it’s so rare I am excited for it, so I haven’t worked on it in at least a month, even when I know I could finish it in a night or two... Sorry! And I haven’t started chapter4 besides two short drabbled paragraphs I had to get out.

I am writing more fishy fucking going forwards though. I’m SUPER excited about the one I did fanart of hehe, with half-transformed Luca x human Beto. Was planning to finish it off this weekend, but I’ve been so immersed in my long fic. (Which I am so excited about and am so desperate to share about, but it’s way too up in the air for that. Just know that I am experimenting and finding the right place to whump Beto into:

#skypieposts #ty bec <3!#skypiechats #skypiefics

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meruz · 4 years ago

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Aforementioned long ask post please excuse me while i try to figure out tumblr's new text editor. I’ll get into the art meme questions first and then the rest at the end.

Ok first of all thank you all for sending in questions! Giving me an excuse to talk hehe. I’ll address these in number order. Here’s a link to the ask meme for reference but also I’ll restate the question for ease of reading.

1. When did you get into art?

Super cliche answer but I don’t remember a time where I WASN’T the weird art kid! I started keeping a dedicated sketchbook when I was about 12? But here’s a page from my kindergarten journal about what I want to be when I grow up.

2. What art-related sites have you ever signed up for?

LOL this is a weird question. Not sure why so many people want to know. Anyways I definitely had a dA. more than one dA account. I used to browse oekakis when I was a kid but I think I was only signed up to some small ones that internet friends owned. What else...? Mangabullet,Tegakie, Paintberri, iscribble back when that was a thing, instagram if that COUNTs, I used to post art on livejournal and dreamwidth too. Patreon, I guess. Gumroad, inprnt, bigcartel, storenvy all for selling stuff.

In terms of resources.. I have a schoolism account that I’m sharing with friends. Used to take classes on coursera for free. I signed up to textures.com for work recently haha. I can’t remember if I ever had an account on posemaniacs. Did they have accounts...? I definitely used to visit all the time.

3. Show us your oldest piece of art you have on hand.

Alright here’s me actually logging into my old deviantart account. These are from September 2008 So I was 13 years old. I don’t have a deviantart account from before then because 13 was the required age for having an account and I didn’t want to lie about my age because I wanted people to be impressed by how young yet clearly incredible at art I was LOL.

4. What defines your artistic style?

You guys are probably more equipped to answer this than me but uh... I wanna say... Focus on colors. And... a slightly heavy hand? Like confident... not always well-considered mark making HAH...

Also I think I have a pretty healthy mix of american comics/manga influences. I feel like people who are into american comics always think my art is too manga and people who are into anime/manga always think my art is too american. And I’m taking that as a good sign.

5. Do you practice other styles/have you tried other styles in the past?

I like to think I switch it up a bunch! I mean, these are pretty different, right?

I think I’ve mentioned this before but one thing I really took away from art school is that, for an illustrator at least, art style shouldn’t be consistent. Your greatest weapon is changing the aspects of your style based on the task, the emotions and message you want to illustrate etc. So depending on the project I’m working on, the fandom I’m drawing for, whether I want something to be funny or serious or dramatic, I’ll change things about my style all the time.

One thing I don’t rly post on here is really tight polished work and that’s because I do that for my day job haha. If you’re not paying me... I’m probably not gonna color in the lines.

6. What levels of artistic education have you had?

I have a whole ass diploma LOL. Bachelor of Fine Arts in Illustration. from the Rhode Island School of Design. And I had a great college experience tbh. Besides the student loans. If any of you guys are thinking about art school feel free to e-mail or message me questions or concerns, I’ll be happy to help. Be as honest as I can be.

7. Show us at least one picture you drew or sketched recently that you did not put on a public site.

heres the wandavision kids. Uhh what else do I have...I feel like I’m rummaging for loose change here...

assorted valentines prep doodles

8. What is your favourite piece that you have done?

Well, obviously this is gonna change all the time and generally it’s gonna be my most recent piece LOL. So yeah, why the hell not. I’ll say it’s this one. I have a pretty short memory which I count as a blessing for an artist. I don’t dwell that long on older work and it keeps me moving forward.

10. What do you like most about your art?

I like that it’s something that only I would make! I had this thought fairly recently and I wrote it down in my sketchbook, it’s pretty cheesy and rambling but it felt revolutionary at the time:

So yeah. I like my art best when it’s the most me and for me. And I like it least when it feels like I’m just making something for social media or for other people’s expectations or whatever.

14. What do you like drawing the most?

Kids in baggy clothing are like my go-to LOL idk if that’s obvious. but also I like being challenged so lately I’ve really loved drawing multi-character compositions, environments, weird angles, etc.

oh i LOVE drawing the underside of shoes lol. And bandages. People that are kinda beat up.. I think it comes from getting a bunch of cuts all the time. I’m always patching myself up and I want to patch characters up too.

15. What do you like drawing the least?

mmm I try to find something to like in every drawing but lets see... I don’t like doing commissions of people’s dogs. Just because it’s normally like... a family friend and my mom volunteered me without my consent and I don’t even really know what they’re expecting me to draw and I don’t even get to meet the dog. Also I’m not that great at dog anatomy. Trying to learn though.

18. What is your purpose for drawing?

This could have a million answers! Uhhh to GIT GOOD??? But also to express myself... and also to make money... I mean it depends on what the drawing IS. I draw fanart mostly to connect to people in the fandom so if you ever see me drawing fanart please take it as like an open invitation to talk to me about the character haha.

20. How would you rank your art? (poor, mediocre, good, etc.)

Good!!! I have a lot of self-confidence primarily born out of ignorance and a short attention span. If I don’t think too hard about how many other artists are mindblowingly unfathombly good... its easy to think I’m good too! LOL

In all seriousness though, I think the opinion a person has of their art is like a crazy balancing act, right? Like you have to think you suck enough to want to get better but also you have to think you’re good enough to not want to give up. I think we’re all walking that line, I know I am! But also I’m a glass half-full type of person so. Most of the time I feel good about it.

22. List at least one of your “artspirations.”

This is a good question because I’ve been trying and failing to put together one of those “influence map” memes for like a full month now. What’s giving me a hard time is I feel like none of these are actually really obvious “““influences”““ in my art? Like it’s hard to see a lot of them in the work I make...? But idk maybe you guys’ll see what I can’t.

And these are just a couple! God there’s so many more. I could talk about other artists for ages, from all different genres of art. Daumier, Rockwell like every illustrator out there, Dana Gibson, Alex Toth, Hiroshi Yoshida, a lot of the Brandywine School. Lots of current working artists too, Karl Kerschl, frikkin Masashi Kishimoto lol, Jake Wyatt, Richie Pope, Edouard Caplain, Matt Cook, Sachin Teng, - lots of big internet artists, Sophie Li, Freddy Carrasco, Milliofish, Angela Sung... like all my friends from art school too. I could just keep going but I’ll stop for now lol.

24. Do you have a shameful art past? (recolour sprite comics, tracing art, etc.)

I mean if that’s how we’re defining shameful?? sure LOL. It’s not sprite comics but I used to do pokemon sprite recolors all the time. And I used to trace manga panels and color them... Granted this was all when I was like under 12 yrs old so it’s not even embarrassing. Can you really call it shameful when a 7 year old wets the bed or whatever? Not really. In fact some of these are cool as fuck. Look

25. Draw a picture!

Man I’m so tired now but here.

I used to get a lot of compliments for drawing people smiling lol but I don’t think I’ve drawn a lot of smiling lately.. here’s proof I’ve still got it.

OK MEME DONE. onto the rest.

I read this ask first thing when i opened my computer in the morning and it made me really emotional.. I’m so glad my sketches could help you!!

I think a lot of artists on social media talk about the struggle of making art but imo not enough people talk about the joy! Like I know it’s corny but. I really meant what I said at the beginning of that sketchbook about re-contextualizing art around process and progress > product and perfection. I think its super important..! The strength of messy, unfinished, and energetic art! For the feeling of it, for the love it!

That's crazy!!! I hope you like 'em. The whole line of x-books is really good rn imo.

Hi! I totally have the answer for digital stuff on my faq lol. But in terms of drawing on paper.. it varies! I tend to use sketchbooking and any on-paper doodling I do as a way to loosen up/warm-up or experiment. But right now my go-to aresenal is:

from top > bottom

- kuretake no.55 doublesided brush pen

- tombow fudenosuke

- muji 0.38 ballpoint

- medium size poscas

- grey tombow double brush pens

- good ol bic mechanical pencil

not EXACTly sure which inking you referring to from my sketchbook but if I had to take a guess it'd probably be the kuretake no55. That's been my main inker, lately. Great for sketching with the thin end too.

You can print out and eat my art if you like. Just please don't mass produce or re-sell. <3

Thanks! I've come to accept that my art is always gonna be sort of gestural and painty naturally. It's getting it to tighten up enough to be legible that's hard lol...

uh yeah lol I agree actually. I think yolei is great.

I assume these asks are related? LOL

1) Yeah totally true. I love David.

2) I don’t take requests, sorry! But if you want to commission me to draw Legion i would be MORE than happy to. Just e-mail me at [email protected].

<33333333333333333333333333

#ask #anonymous

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jasperwhitcock · 4 years ago

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equinox | chapter 07 –– “a cruel god, a wrathful goddess”

here is chapter six of my bella as a vampire and edward as a human fanfic inspired by an au that @bellasredchevy posted. you can read the new chapter on AO3 or here. i post updates on AO3 or on tumblr using the #equinoxjw tag. but it seems 10/10 times my tag does not work, so that is a fun mystery for me to solve.

oof... sometimes u get distracted and then ur sister gets married and then u get unmotivated & d*pressed and forget to update ur fanfic for over three months... my bad y'all... sorry for the wait hehe. i hope it is worth it. again, i'm so thankful for the comments & i read them all. i get too shy to respond, but i WILL. i just need to talk myself up first. i love u. thank u. hehe. ♡♡♡ merry christmas/happy holidays if i fail u again before the 25th. i WANT to update more frequently. my catchphrase these days is "i'm trying my best," so... i'm trying my best.

this is for the sweet anons who slide into my ask box & ask me questions abt my fanfic. and for taryn, who consistently reminds me that there are people wanting to read this seeing as she is one of those people, kim, who i am so desperate to impress that i began working on a new chapter once she started to read my fanfic, and kae, because without her, this fanfic would never have existed in the first place. i love how i'm writing this as though it's the intro to an actual book when it's literally just chapter seven. ok, i will shut up now so u can read. love u. again.

07 A CRUEL GOD, A WRATHFUL GODDESS

In great contrast to the noisy ambience of the other students in the hallway, we were silent on our walk to our shared biology class. I wondered how conscious Edward was of the stares and whispers focused on our proximity to one another, but my guess was that he was very much conscious of it. I intentionally ignored glancing in any direction that I sensed one of my siblings’ presence, although I figured it was mostly paranoia driving me to feel as though we were about to cross paths. Holding my breath to more easily walk beside Edward left my senses impaired to the ability to pinpoint their location.

I was lucky that for the majority of my immortal life, I’d managed to escape unwanted attention. But now, it seemed that precious luck had finally run out. Maybe embarrassment had been creeping up on me, maliciously building itself up all these years, waiting until just the right moment to rear its ugly head and exact revenge that immorality had stolen its favorite object of humiliation to torment. But here it was, ensuring that I was finally catching up on feeling awkward and out of step, a feeling I experienced for what seemed like the entirety of my human life. I thought once I’d been changed, I’d never feel this way again, but becoming misaligned with my family made me feel bashful to parade my defiance in their faces. I had operated better under no scrutiny as a mortal and was surprised to realize that that still held true as an immortal as well. Because though there was now never a struggle of staying upright or a risk of tripping over my own feet, that didn’t prevent me from feeling self-conscious as I walked beside Edward. Although for different reasons –– it was too mortifying to consider what my family might make of what my actions suggested about my feelings towards Edward.

And yet still, I would put up with the ridicule and disapproval of my siblings if it meant I could listen to Edward speak his silly philosophical theology, his questioning of god and existence, for just a few more hours. If I were going to be teased over Alice’s visions regardless, I might as well find out what I can about this pretentious boy before I leave him alone forever. If only to understand why his moving to this small town threatened to warp my own future so much. In losing night and in losing death, there were so very little anomalies in the endless amount of time I’d been given. So what would it hurt to allow myself to fixate on this minuscule difference in my life for just awhile?

It could hurt Edward, a more selfless part of myself reminded me. If indulging myself was playing with fire, I was being justly punished with the way flames were efflorescing the inside of my dry, burning throat.

If a god did exist, why would it make sense for such a being to craft someone like Edward with his perceptivity, and send him off to this small town, home to a secret such as ours? If a god did exist, why it would be fair for such a being to craft someone like Edward, someone who tempted me both in bloodlust and in curiosity, and send him off to this small town, home to the very vampire who desperately wished to kill him most? If a god did exist, if our kind had fallen short of heaven, I could understand why sending Edward into our path –– and more specifically, my path –– could be some kind of punishment. But what I couldn’t understand is why a god would allow someone as innocent as Edward to be endangered for the sake of bringing a sinful, undead creature to justice. It seemed the only reasonable explanation would be that a god probably did not exist.

And how could there be? I was on the precipice of falling into temptation with every step further in the hallway and every question he asked and answered. I could never not be very much aware of the fact –– especially now with his body merely inches from my side and his sweet fragrance blooming both deliciously and relentlessly in the air. And even as I impossibly withstood the lure of his blood, how was I meant to ignore the irresistibility of his mind and how inexplicably concerned I was to understand it? It seemed like a very cruel experiment of free will and knowledge –– far too cruel to allow much room for the kind of god Edward hoped for.

I frowned as I realized that this experiment wasn’t that of a cruel god’s but that of a cruel vampire, and I felt very much like a vampire as the sound of his heartbeat was so appealing that it made my mouth water.

“Do the stares bother you?” Edward spoke quietly to me as we weaved throughout the hallway. Easily distracted, his question was able to pull the more civilized parts of myself together, though this was probably also in thanks to my choosing not to utilize my sense of smell. I found it funny that at least one of his thoughts had been in a similar vicinity. But of course, the rest of his thoughts were probably free of all consuming agony and struggle. For all his curiosity about morality, to inflict this existence upon him would probably devour him in misery. At least as a human, despite whatever conclusions he may come to, there was still some hope to be had for an afterlife. This thought should have been dark and depressing, but because it made Alice’s vision seem like a complete hoax, I almost found it funny. How would Edward ever end up like me?

“Oh, no,” I swallowed the venom in my mouth. “I live for attention.” I watched from the corner of my eyes as his gaze flickered over to me, the ever present half smile appearing on his face at my joke. My answer came out so comfortably as though I was used to this, when in reality, the student body for the most part had grown accustomed to ignoring me. And, of course, there was nothing comfortable about the demanding, aching dryness in my mouth or the burning in my nostrils. “How about you?”

“Likewise,” he joked, laughing. “This is interesting –– their fascination. I understood their interest on my first day because I’d guess a new addition to the student body in a town this small is something of a rarity, but today, walking by your side is garnering even more attention. Is it a once in a lifetime opportunity to have Bella Cullen walk you to class?”

“You’re just so observant, aren’t you?” I rolled my eyes, though the corners of my mouths pulled up despite myself. “And I’m not walking you to class. I’m walking to a class I just so happen to share with you, so don’t get the wrong idea. I think they’re just surprised because they’re probably under the impression that I don’t play nice with others.”

“And do you?”

“You tell me,” I replied, pausing to face him beside a wall of lockers next to the entrance of our biology classroom. As he stopped beside me, a gust of air from a passing student walking hastily down the hallway sent his scent reeling into me at an unfortunate moment where I’d chosen to breathe in. My muscles tensed to spring, and I desperately anchored myself to the floor as my mind fell into disarray.

“Nicely enough,” Edward winked naturally as though we’d been the best of friends since his first day. The demanding thirst was intruding on my awareness, and the desperation for something wet and hot and delicious in my desiccated throat was so dizzying that his voice sounded as though it were underwater. With an effort as though I were swimming through drying cement, I resurfaced, just barely proving my dominion over the desire. I focused on his voice so that it’d become clearer, forcing myself to take another excruciating breath in and exhale the fire out. “I will say I am honored to be the exception –– to be plucked from the masses by the renowned, reclusive Bella Cullen.”

With torturous effort, I snorted as though I wasn’t fighting everything within me to keep him alive. I breathed in again heavily, allowing my body to become a pyre so that I could speak. “Alright, that’s enough. Stop saying my name like that. And you’ve lost the privilege. I am never walking you to class again,” I rolled my eyes even though my joke could very much be the truth. The bunching of my muscles, the twitching of my hands, and the fierce pain in my throat reminded me of the fact. Before he could point out the contradiction of what I’d previously clarified, I sighed. “Let’s take this quiz.”

His pretty green eyes were alive with mischief and enlightened with what must be more answers to questions he hadn’t outright asked me as he turned to enter the classroom. I followed behind him towards our shared table.

Air from the vent rushed out, thrusting the scent of his blood wafting into my face again. I paused for an indistinguishable moment as I battled agony, murderousness, monstrosity. Holy fuck. What was I trying to prove! Was it really worth this? Swallowing hard, I sat beside him as though nothing happened. My suffering was so great that Emmett could have brutally ripped my arm off, he could have beat me with it, and I wouldn’t have noticed nor felt a thing. I could have been set on fire, and it’d feel like sinking into a cool pool of water on an even cooler day. I was already burning alive, my body acting as a furnace, and I was imprisoned inside it.

Without intending to, I sighed aloud, exhaling as though it would smother the flames. It was a stupid, attention seeking thing to do. Humans sighed to expel air or express some sadness or relief or exhaustion, so when my family emitted an audible breath, we did so as a means of blending in. But to breath out in a way to clue Edward into the fact something was plaguing me… it was a stupid invitation for more questions. And these were questions I had no intention of sharing the answers to. I felt his eyes on me, but before he could say anything, Mr. Molina began passing out quizzes face down on our lab tables as students continued to pile in from lunch.

“Alright, class. Today we have a pop quiz–– oh, come on, guys, don’t groan. You will have the opportunity to make corrections after these have been graded. This is just an assessment of what you’ve retained from this unit so far. You will have the entire period to complete–– thanks for joining us, Mr. Patterson, glad you could fit my class into your busy schedule. Why don’t you take your seat? –– You will have the entire period to complete your quiz. If you finish early, feel free to get a head start on this weekend’s homework! I’ve written the reading down on the board. Aw, I’m sure you’re all moaning because you’re disappointed at how light of an assignment it is because I just know how very excited you all are to continue your passionate pursuit of studying biology. Alright, now that everyone’s settled–– wait a minute––” Mr. Molina paused, raising his pointer finger in the air, his eyes squinted in anticipation. Three seconds later, the bell signaled the beginning of class. “Begin!”

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Edward reluctantly turn away from me. In an elegant script, he wrote his name at the top of the paper and began his quiz. I turned away from him to look at my own paper, preparing myself to uncomfortably hold my breath for the next hour. The difference this made in my thirst was almost insignificant, but enough so that it gave me a tiny more leverage in my control. I smoothed out the pucker on my forehead with the eraser from my pencil, accidentally snapping the rubber off against my face.

Absentmindedly, I began to breeze through the assessment, circling the correct answers, but my mind was more absorbed in the warmth of sitting beside Edward. Aside from the affliction of doing so, it was too pleasurable to have sat beside him so often and for so long today. I enjoyed the toastiness like a lizard basking in the sun. It made me recall the muddy human memory of laying out on a blanket in my backyard beneath my beloved blue Arizona sky, hiding beneath the small shade of a book. Not the blistering heat of a summertime Phoenix sun, but the warmth of the first day of spring. But the heat of Edward’s body alone was enough to fill my mouth with venom, so I tried to refocus my attention onto my quiz.

When I turned to the last page of questions, a motion beside me diverted my concentration once again. I peeked over, turning my head slightly in Edward’s direction to see what it was. As he thought over one of the questions, his right hand was moving peculiarly as he lifted and dropped down his long fingers almost as though he were impatiently tapping each digit one by one along the tabletop. Except the movement was more exact and calculatingly random. Engrossed, I watched as his his soft, fragile skin rippled over the muscle, the tendons appearing and disappearing with every bizarre movement. It took me a moment to make the connection between the large grand piano in his home and the motion of his hands. I realized he was miming piano movements while he thought through his answers. There was something both weird, funny, and endearing about this. I smiled to myself, not having the required oxygen to quietly laugh.

I felt his curious eyes flicker over to me and watched peripherally as he raised his eyebrows. I shook my head, biting down on my lip to unsuccessfully fight the smile, and returned to completing my quiz.

I finished a moment later and impatiently waited another ten minutes or so before I could turn in my work. I tried to ignore Edward for this small period of time at least, mentally reading myself the opening chapter to Wuthering Heights. Even though the words were committed to my memory, it was still never as good as actually reading from the book itself.

Once I’d decided an appropriate enough time had passed, I stood up to walk my quiz to the completed basket on Mr. Molina’s desk. Even having waited, I was still the first to finish the examination.

“Thank you,” the teacher whispered without breaking his focus away from the crossword puzzle he peered through his glasses at. I breathed in now that I’d placed some distance between myself and Edward, gladly facing the cool, fresh air from the vent.

“Neophyte,” I whispered back now that I’d replenished my oxygen supply.

“Excuse me?” He glanced up, his slightly aged face confused.

“Neophyte,” I repeated. “Eight across, two down.”

I took in one last clean breath and walked back to my seat as he tapped his pen across the squares of the space, mouthing his count of the letters to check if the word fit.

As soon as I took my place in my seat again, Edward stood up to walk his own quiz to the basket.

I wanted to watch him, but instead I forced myself to unzip my backpack and retrieve the biology textbook.

Busying myself with the assigned chapters, deciding to actually read them so as to not feed into my invasive Edward obsession, I couldn’t help but listen as Edward too placed his own textbook on the countertop.

I heard the scribble of pen on paper as he began to write what I imagined were notes until his large hand slid the paper over to me beneath the wall of my hair spilling over the desk. Well, I wouldn’t ignore him if he was the one deciding to bother me.

You know I’m pretty certain that cheating is a violation of the student handbook, but I’ll let you get away with it just this once.

I turned to glance at his face to see if he were serious. His eyes were warm and inviting, his mouth in the same crooked smile.

I took the piece of paper and looked around for my writing utensil that had gone missing somehow. My eyes zeroed in on a suspicious, tiny pile of wood dust on my side of the desk. When had I brutalized my pencil? He held his hand out to offer his own pen, and I accepted it, carefully plucking it from his fingers without making contact.

I wasn’t cheating. You were doing something funny. And what do you know about the student handbook? You’re new.

I slid the paper and pen back to him and watched as he combed a hand through his bronze hair, reading my response. The smile grew wider as he construed the biting tone of my note.

Can I be let in on the joke? Edward wrote, turning to look at me once he was done. Again I was prisoner, though this time not to my own body. I was momentarily held hostage by the beauty and warmth of his light green eyes. I was understanding more and more the attraction the other students had for him. If I had a soul, it was as though he were staring straight into it.

I recovered, placing my hand atop the desk and then wiggling my fingers as though I were weaving my way through a very complicated piano piece.

Oh, Edward mouthed, immediately understanding. He silently laughed and placed his left hand to his forehead briefly as if to hide his face in mock embarrassment. The ink from the pen spilled onto the paper as he began to write again.

In my defense, there’s research that supports classical music puts students in a heightened emotional state, making them more receptive to information and helping them focus.

That’s very nerdy of you. I scribbled back, the corners of my lips pulled upwards.

I know. As I read the words on the notebook paper, we both laughed a little too loudly for the quietness of the room.

“Please remain silent for your classmates still working,” Mr. Molina stage-whispered from his desk, his eyes still fixated on the crossword puzzle.

It’s a bad habit. Edward tacked on to his message. I beamed. I knew a thing or two about bad habits today. I was appreciative of this silent conversation on paper; it made it easier to be beside him without needing to breathe to speak aloud.

What were you playing? I scrawled.

Clair de Lune. Edward wrote back. His thick eyebrows raised as my eyes lit up, and he continued writing. You know Debussy?

My mother used to play a lot of classical music around the house. It was one of my favorites.

It’s one of my favorites, too. Edward’s eyes were a little sad and lost in thought, and he smiled softly.

I was shocked by the change in expression and weirdly desperate to return the brightness back to his eyes. The burn in my throat was almost forgettable in the face of my concern. Almost, but not quite. He turned his head down to write on the paper again.

You said Rosalie played piano. You never learned? He turned to look at me, his expression curious. I shook my head and shrugged, reaching for the pen.

I didn’t think I had the coordination for it. While this was true for the time I was human, it wasn’t true now. Still, even though my days stretched into endless nights, I hadn’t yet devoted time to any instrument as an immortal.

Edward read the paper, his long pointer finger tracing the line beneath the words as he did so. He held his large hand out, and I dropped the pen into it.

I’ll show you sometime. Edward half smiled at me, his eyes sweet and earnest.

Knowing I shouldn’t be allowing him to think making a plans with me was an option, I reached for the pen to tell him that it was alright, but I froze as he suddenly moved to drop the pen and take my hand. Though he should have been the one hesitant and cautious as though approaching a dangerous, wounded animal, I held perfectly still as though he were the danger, and I needed to play dead for protection. You can’t play dead if you are dead, I thought to myself.

My body tensed as my hand was enveloped in the heat of his much larger palm, uncertain as to what he was doing. My muscles screamed at me as I clenched my free hand into a tight fist, terrified of myself.

A shiver rippled through him as he felt the chill of my frozen fingers, and I twitched the hand in his possession, wanting to yank it away to protect him from the iciness but not wanting to alert him with the swiftness of the motion.

He smiled mysteriously at the spasm as though he somehow expected it. I wanted to ask him what he was thinking but didn’t want to risk breathing. My control could too easily be lost. Besides, I was scared that if I were to open my mouth, I’d end up screaming.

I felt him push slightly and realized he wished for me to curl my fingers, so with great concentration and the acute awareness of his fragility, I moved my stony hand into the shape he directed, my fingers curved slightly beneath his like a relaxed talon. I didn’t like the shape; it was odd and inhuman and made me think of the violence I could cause.

But it wasn’t a claw. Because once my hand was positioned the way he wanted, he began to slowly place pressure on my fingers, and I dipped and rose them accordingly to carefully move with his. I watched as the two of our hands together played what I imagined must be the opening chords to Clair de Lune.

The disconcerting emptiness in my chest soared at the bizarre pleasure of this touch, and a weird sensation tickled my scalp, moving swiftly down my spine to my entire body.

My muscles tightened violently and then relaxed, sending a shiver to ripple through me. It was too much pleasure and too much pain as my throat ached and I leaned into the warmth.

Embarrassed and not wanting to push my luck, I cautiously pulled my hand slowly away. He lifted his hand to allow me to escape as though I couldn’t just break his hand to do so, a half-smile pulling on his lips. I pretended not to notice the goosebumps on his arms.

See? he mouthed before deciding to whisper. “You could do it.”

I forced myself to smile and then turned away for the rest of the hour, trying to keep from doing anything stupid like looking at him or killing him. I’d completely forgotten where we were.

When the bell finally rung, I collected my things atop the desk hastily. Edward reached for my backpack and held it up for me.

“Thanks,” I murmured as I dumped my books into the bag. Before I could take it from him, he slid it onto his back and nodded his head once for me to go forward.

Feeling awkward, I turned and allowed him to follow me to the door. I was lucky to walk in front of him, taking the opportunity to breath again as the vent blew out in front of my face.

Exiting the classroom, I paused for a second when I saw Emmett waiting for me across the hallway rather than his typical spot beside the wall of lockers next to our shared Spanish classroom. Even though I was well aware of the fact I’d been dangling my irresponsibility in their faces all day, I still felt as though I was being caught in the act.

Emmett’s eyebrows raised as his golden eyes watched Edward follow behind me, carrying my backpack. I crossed the hallway reluctantly towards my big brother.

“Hello,” I greeted him, avoiding his eyes. I felt smaller than ever beside him with my head down, and yet not small enough as I wished to disappear.

“Hey, little sis,” Emmett began uncertainly, though I glanced up to see his full lips were beginning to stretch into a smile that I didn’t like. “Who’s that with you?”

“Uh…”

“I’m Edward Masen,” the lanky human boy introduced himself confidently as he stopped beside me. “And you must be––”

“Emmett,” my brother interrupted, grinning as though he always so comfortably interacted with humans. This was all too weird, but he looked to be enjoying it far too much. His desire to mess with me and his confidence in Alice’s visions seemed to override the abnormality of speaking to a student so amicably. I watched as he breathed in and shot me a meaningful look. I grimaced.

I opened my mouth to put an end to this torturously awkward interaction, but Emmett interrupted again.

“It’s nice to see you made a friend,” he began, an evil glint in his eyes as he watched my face. I was confused as to where he was going with this because our entire family would come across as misanthropic to the rest of the school, so why should it matter to him. He turned his attention to look at Edward who was closer in height to him. “You know, we worry about her––”

“Okay, let’s go to Spanish,” I cut him off quickly. “Edward, can I have my bag, please?”

Without looking at him, I reached for my backpack as he offered it and threw it over my shoulder, heading down the hallway. It was a massive relief to put some distance between myself and Edward. My thoughts were clearer, and I could breathe freely.

Emmett burst into laughter, his guffaws booming in the hallway. Several students paused in fear making me concerned about Edward’s reaction to my giant of a sibling, but I relaxed when I heard Edward chuckling along with him.

“Um, see you,” Emmett said to Edward before his steady, near silent footfall followed after me.

Even moving at a lethargic human pace, he caught up to me quickly.

“That wasn’t funny,” I grumbled.

“What the hell are you doing?” Emmett chuckled, ignoring my question.

“What the hell are you doing? What was that back there?”

“I don’t know. That was weird, but not as weird as you playing with your food.”

I hissed quietly.

“Damn, I’m kidding, Bells. But seriously, what are you doing? What happened to your high and noble speech about doing the right thing and staying away from the kid? I thought Esme was about to produce real tears. It even softened Rose.”

“Ugh, don’t talk to me about Rosalie right now. She’s been giving me dirty looks all day. It makes me feel awful. I already feel bad!”

“Well, I don’t really care what you do either way so––” I looked at him questionably. “I mean, sure, I want you to do the right thing, whatever that means. I don’t want you to feel miserable. But on one end, I didn’t really mind so much what happened to me.”

“Rosalie did,” I countered.

“Yeah, Rose did,” he acquiesced quietly.

“Anyways, I’m not having that conversation. I wasn’t talking to him today to test whether or not he’s worth it. That’s… unethical.”

“So what were you doing?”

“I don’t know,” I groaned in answer.

Emmett laughed.

“You’re weird these days, Bella.”

“You’re weird everyday,” I quipped back before sighing. “I don’t know. He’s weird, too. I guess… I’m not making any decisions, at all, but if Alice told you what she told me… wouldn’t you be curious?”

Emmett thought it over. “Yeah, I think so. But I also don’t think I’d have even made it to this point,” he admitted. I winced.

“It’s kind of unfair for me to care more about satiating my curiosity and dance with the devil this way, right?”

“Well…he may not know it, but isn’t it more so that Edward’s the one dancing with the devil?”

“Yeah,” I agreed, frowning as we walked into our Spanish class. “I guess it is.”

I made the decision to avoid thinking of Edward for the remaining hour of school. I paid very little attention in Spanish, returning to the familiar mind-numbing boredom that classes had been prior to the last few days. Now that it was in stark contrast to the sudden life breathed into my time at Forks High School by my fixation with Edward, the tedium was no longer something dealt with indifferently and sluggishly. Now, it left me feeling restless, and it almost pained me how laborious it was to sit through a life I wasn’t an active participant in. It was nowhere near the pain of dealing with the excruciating thirst I had around my bronze-haired lab partner, but it almost tampered with my thoughts more knowing I’d feel less miserable if I spent this time analyzing every word Edward shared with me, every fluctuation of his tone, every glint in his perceptive eyes, every expression on his pretty face… But I was becoming too obsessive. The same hunger for adventure that made me fall in love with reading must be what was leading me to so treacherously, so impetuously dive into exploring this insignificant and yet cataclysmic difference in my life.

As though it had a personal vendetta against me, time moved even more lethargically than it ever had before, but finally, the bell signaling the end of school rang. Emmett’s eyes shot a concerned look at me as I rose from my seat too quickly, and I immediately felt embarrassed again. The cautious reminder in his expression made me feel childish as Emmett was never one to care much about bending the rules.

“See you at home, I guess,” he shook his head, giving me one last look that seemed to suggest I’d lost it.

“See you,” I mumbled, slinging my bag over my shoulder. Leaving Emmett behind to wait for Rosalie, I weaved through the crowded hallway and out to the parking lot. Students were bundling together and squealing at the chilling air as tiny, fluffy snowflakes fluttered down from the overcast sky. The floor of the parking lot was almost as glassy as yesterday as the rain from this afternoon had melted into a thin layer of icy mush. Though there was hardly enough snow for a decent snowball fight, some of the rowdier students were bundling up a pitiful pile of snow to form pathetic snowballs in their fists.

I nearly skipped to the pearly white vehicle parked beside Rosalie’s overly conspicuous crimson car which was forming a small crowd of admirers. Leaning against the trunk of the car, I watched the front doors of the school to look for Edward.

The tangle of reddish-brown hair was easy to spot because of its strange metallic tint as he strolled out of the building with Naomi, the student who’d provided him with the information about my family on his first day. He had his coat folded over his arm, revealing how form fitting his light tan turtleneck was. He truly was a very attractive boy. It was odd that I hadn’t really paid much attention initially. With his dazzling face and tall, lean frame, Edward was pretty enough that for the vampires who searched for exquisitely beautiful humans to create into even more stunning immortals, he could probably be a contender for someone to collect.

Thinking of how Emmett questioned my motives today, I quickly banished the idea of Edward as an immortal from my mind, even if it was only a hypothetical inspired by my observation.

Edward paused, asking Naomi if she could hold on to his backpack for a moment. When she grabbed it, he pulled on his long black coat, and fiddled with the collar. Recollecting his backpack, he slid it onto one shoulder, then rubbed his hands together, blowing the warm air from his mouth to heat them up. Thinking of the sweetness of the smell of his breath made me remember to take in swallows of fresh air before he made his way over to me.

As he was distracted momentarily, I watched as a stray snowball flew towards Edward’s head. I was overcome with the urge to intercept it in the event it may hit him too harshly and knock him to the pavement, but flying across the parking lot inhumanly fast twice in one week was probably not the way to go about correcting my mistakes.

The soggy snowball crashed into Edward’s hair, exploding into shards of ice and water that slid down his prominent cheekbone. I laughed aloud at his shocked expression as the curtain bangs framing his face were immediately drenched, darkening his hair into a brown color. Once he’d realized what happened, his face broke into a good-humored smile.

“Holy shit! Sorry, Edward!” The classmate who had thrown the snowball with poor aim called out.

“No worries!” Edward called back. He shook his head, chuckling as he wiped the water from his face. As he laughed, his eyes found the space where I waited and brightened seeing that I, too, was enjoying the moment.

“Hey, I’ll see you tomorrow,” he told Naomi, who was too beside herself in tears of laughter to reply.

Edward sauntered over towards me, and I inhaled deeply as a fortuitous whisper of wind blew from the tree line. I held onto the notes of crisp eucalyptus, fresh snow, and cedar wood, trying to distract my mind from the offensively mouthwatering scents approaching me.

Edward was a coordinated human, but even he lost his footing on the icy pavement. His body slid forward for a moment, but I stepped towards him to close the space between us and caught him by the elbow.

He looked up from his boots against the frozen parking lot into my eyes, startled momentarily at the swiftness in which I had appeared. Then, his full lips lifted into a crooked smile that creased his astonishing green eyes into half moons. I let go immediately and took a big step back to ensure a safer distance between myself and the warmth of his fragile body. It had been a risky movement, but somehow in comparison to yesterday, it didn’t seem to matter as much. I figured our classmates were too involved in their gawking at the details of my sister’s car or their feeble, slushy snowball fight to notice, and oddly, I didn’t care that Edward had seen. It was beginning to feel too late to keep up certain pretenses.

Although, it wasn’t too late, and it shouldn’t feel that way. I reminded myself I still had every intention of leaving Edward alone once I’d figured out what was so compelling about our paths crossing that had Alice’s visions spiraling in a confusing jumble. I took another step back slowly.

“Thank you,” Edward said, his eyes humored with another secret he didn’t seem willing to share. “You keep saving me.”

“Well, let’s not make this damsel in distress thing habitual,” I snorted, turning so that he couldn’t see the smile forming on my face. I felt shy about showcasing any comfort or happiness in his presence now that I was reminded of how fleeting this experimental friendship was, but I wondered if subconsciously I wanted him to catch me in my misery and ask me to explain, though I wasn’t certain why I wanted to sabotage myself like that. I opened my door and turned to look at him again. “You coming?”

Before he could answer, I dipped into the driver’s seat, and breathed in one last time. Well, once this was all over, I could finally stop inhaling dramatically as though they were truly my last, dying breaths. The air was mostly clean of his scent, but I knew that regardless, the heat of his body would be enough to disrupt my comfort and control. As the thought crossed my mind, I painfully swallowed back the venom pooling beneath my tongue.

Edward swerved through the crowd obsessing over Rosalie’s car and opened the passenger door, sliding into his seat. As he placed his backpack on the floor and fiddled with his seatbelt, I made sure to adjust the air conditioning so that the heat could warm Edward from the frigid Forks air. Though for me, just being in his presence made the intimate interior of the car feel as though I were again sitting by his fireplace.

“That’s a beautiful car,” he murmured. “Is it an M8?”

“Uh, it’s a BMW?” I asked uncertainly as though he’d spoken another language.

Edward grinned as though he wanted to laugh but didn’t want to make me angry. Rosalie would have loved to answer all his questions if he too had an interest in cars. Would have loved to, if she wasn’t deeply offended by my actions or if I had any intention of Edward meeting any more of my family members.

“Ready?” I bit my lip as I forced out any inconsiderate plots of murder that threatened to distract me from being a defensive driver.

“Mhm,” Edward answered.

I reversed out of the parking slot slowly, but as I looked in the rearview once I’d straightened out, I saw the fleeting image of Rosalie’s exquisitely beautiful and exceptionally angry face. I quickly readjusted the mirror to remove my sister’s reflection and sped out of the parking lot in a way that could have taken out a few unlucky students if I didn’t have above average years of driving experience.

Peripherally, I watched as Edward’s thick eyebrows raised, but he decided not to question me. Once we’d reached the main road, I slowed my speed so as not to rush through this time, even though I knew for his safety and my sanity, I should. As I drove, his right hand moved in odd shapes again against the arm rest of the passenger side door as though he were playing piano once more.

I decided to bite and use up some of my limited air supply.

“What are you playing?”

“Clair de Lune again,” he replied. Then, he began to hum the melody aloud for me as he moved his hand.

I thought to offer to play the song for him through the speakers, but I decided against it as I listened to Edward’s soft, velvety voice hum beautifully through the song, breaking the silence.

The ugly, slush-like falling of snow transformed into a falling of rainwater, and Edward’s voice was orchestrated by a lovely symphony of raindrops.

Before his voice could weave into the more involved moments of the piece, Edward stopped.

I looked over at him, curious for the reason as to why. His face was turned away from me so that all I could see was his untidy bronze hair as he gazed out the window. I pulled in front of his driveway and parked against the curb.

Miraculously, I’d made it again. Carefully, I inhaled through my nose to experiment with my control. The sweet bouquet of the boy’s blood was potent and even more mouthwatering than usual from the snow turned rain that’d wet his hair. I hadn’t considered the possibility that he could smell better than before, and I kept myself from groaning aloud as I dug my nails into my own palms. The tingling sensation in my nose was as though I’d sniffed some powerful chemical, the burning sensation in my throat as though I’d taken a long drag of a cigarette. But more painful. More demanding. Desire, need flew from my core out towards my extremities, and the beating of his heart pumping the blood through his body drummed loudly in my ears. It seemed to move through me, my frigid body almost twitching with every pulse, ready to lunge forward and crush his neck to my lips.

“What was your mother like?” He asked me suddenly, his voice soft. Edward turned from the window to face me, and I was bewildered by the intensity of his expression. His eyes were light and beautiful against the gloomy grey of the sky, and they squinted slightly as though studying my face like this information was absolutely essential. But this was not what stunned me, as I’d already seen the severity of this expression before in our ephemeral time together. It was the unexpected vulnerability of his stunning face. The more time I spent looking at him, the more I realized how beautiful this human boy really was. And it seemed a great tragedy for this beautiful boy to harbor such devastation in his eyes.

Whereas previously in his presence, my thoughts had become incoherent due to a lapse in control, now my thoughts were incoherent in distress and desperation to understand what had gone wrong and how I could fix it. I was momentarily dumbfounded, but I pulled myself together after the soft sound of a few droplets of rain against the roof reminded me that he was waiting for an answer.

“Well, she looked a lot like me, but prettier,” I began stupidly. He raised his eyebrows. “Or at least, she used to look a lot like me, and I used to look a lot like her. I don’t so much anymore.” It’d been so long since I’d really spoken about my mom, and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to laugh or cry. I knew I should have made some comment about whether or not she looked like Esme or Emmett since our story made us siblings, but I didn’t want to taint the rarity of sharing who she was with a lie.

“She was more outgoing than I am,” I continued, thinking through the foggy memories I held onto from my human life.

“That’s difficult to believe,” Edward teased quietly, his lips curving into a half smile.

I laughed, listening to the melodic sound of it, thinking of how it symbolized how very much different I was now from the human girl my mother knew.

“I was always very shy,” I smiled, before speaking up again, caught in the echoes of my past. “She was brave and irresponsible and slightly eccentric. And she was a very unpredictable cook!”

I laughed aloud again thinking of some minor explosions in our tiny kitchen and some questionable dishes. Edward laughed too, but when our laughter faded into the falling of the rain, my smile faded.

“She wasn’t perfect,” I admitted. “I think I recognize now that she was very fallible. I worshipped her when I was younger, but when I think back, I do see how in some of the ways she raised me, I was done a disservice… I grew up too fast. When she died––“ I sighed, feeling insincere and guilty about perpetuating this lie when I really should have said when I died, “––Esme became more of a mother to me, and even Rosalie’s been more traditionally nurturing than my mom ever was… But still, she was my best friend.”

“You miss her,” he murmured simply. I met his gentle eyes.

“Yes,” I bit my lip.

“How old are you, Bella?” Edward asked. “And not the formulaic, theorized version where you were born in your thirties. How old are you really?”

I tensed, wondering if he was asking this again because he’d taken note of how I didn’t directly answer this question the last time he asked.

“Seventeen,” I answered automatically.

“You don’t seem seventeen,” he responded, reproachful.

The tension left my body at the tone of his voice. I smiled again easily.

“Sorry?” I asked, biting my lip to hide the smile, unsure of how to respond.

Edward chuckled and the subtle crinkles by his eyes lit up his face. “Well, I wish you’d been given a happier, normal childhood.”

“I’m fine,” I shrugged, brushing it off. “I hardly remember most of it, and what I do remember reminds me that I probably didn’t have much chance at a normal childhood to begin with. I was terribly shy, remember.

“I did do girl scouts, though….Oh, and ballet briefly,” I admitted, unsure as to why I was volunteering so much information about myself. Wasn’t the purpose of me sitting here to uncover information about him?

“Why does that make you… embarrassed?” Edward’s eyebrows pulled up.

For an odd moment, I felt betrayed by the flush of my cheeks before I realized there was no blood rushing to my face. I blinked, bewildered by the peculiarity of this long buried instinct to become frustrated with my easy blushes when I hadn’t blushed for years. I felt self conscious as I wondered what Edward saw reading my expression to so perfectly decipher my feelings.

“I was very uncoordinated,” I dismissed his question as I fought the urge for my hand to flutter to touch my cool cheek.

“Now that truly is difficult to believe,” Edward half-smiled. “I can’t imagine I’ve seen anyone as graceful as you.”

I laughed aloud at his compliment, though I didn’t doubt his sincerity. I knew this was true of myself. It was true of all of our kind to appear fluid and effortless, but still, no one had ever applied the word to me. My vampiric poise was irrelevant and unimpressive to my family, and the very few humans brave enough to overcome their nerves to compliment me typically found their words to fail them.

“You’re very odd,” I beamed.

“What do you mean?” The bronze-haired boy asked, again wanting to be let in on the secret. While I had an insatiable thirst, it seemed he had an insatiable curiosity.

“How old are you really? Your word choice is bizarre for someone your age, you know.”

“Oh,” he laughed easily. “Well, I’m actually not seventeen. I’m eighteen. But I’ll try to strictly adhere to a more teenage vernacular, so I can compliment you in a more acceptable way from now on.”

I looked out at the dim light of the brewing storm, my smile fading as I decided that I should probably allow him to escape me before I did something I’d regret. But I knew I wasn’t resolved enough to completely leave him alone. He made me monopolize too much of the conversation, and I wasn’t satisfied with what I knew about him yet.

I sighed aloud, and Edward, too, looked out at the rain darkened sky.

“Will I see you tomorrow?” he asked hopefully, making the assumption that our conversation was coming to an end.

“Yes,” I promised reluctantly. My eyes flickered back over to his pretty face, studying the lines of his strong jaw, his chiseled cheekbones, his full lips, committing this inconsequential face to memory as I silently resolved that this should be –– and would be –– one of the last times I’d allow myself to be this close to him. Tomorrow may well be the very last.

Likewise, as though his thoughts were in the same vein, his beautiful green eyes studied my face as well, though he did so in that mysterious way of his where he looked at me as though hoping to read my mind.

He sighed, then collected his backpack. Edward opened the door, stepping out into the bitterly cold weather. A shiver ran through his lanky body, making my body tense with perverse excitement. I cringed away from the deadly instinct and swallowed against the dryness of my yearning throat.

Edward’s tall, lean frame leaned down to peek into the car.

“Goodnight, Bella,” he spoke softly.

“Goodnight, Edward,” I almost whispered, gazing into the beauty of his dazzling green eyes.

Edward smiled his half smile, and closed the door, escaping into the building torrent of rain.

I gasped in relief at his absence, then stiffened realizing how the cab of the car was still heavily perfumed with his scent. I took in another deep breath, forcing myself to confront the burning thirst again, willing myself to manage it. I sighed as I hit the gas, making Edward disappear behind me.

Both my control and the rain pour strengthened significantly as I turned onto the long drive leading to my house. I grimaced as I wondered how I’d face my family and explain the complete reversal of what I’d promised to do. I didn’t have time to consider for much longer as suddenly, a figure appeared instantaneously in the drive. I slammed my foot on the brake immediately in shock at its appearance, not wanting to total yet another car against one of my siblings.

I peered through the windshield, unable to see through the complete downpour that submerged my vehicle as though it were underwater. It was annoying for my perfect sight to be obstructed by anything, rainwater or even the transparent windshield because of my eyes’ desire to focus on the microscopic scratches.

The car violently screeched against the muddy pavement, and it looked as though we would have to bid this car goodbye until the figure hidden by the storm placed their hands out on the car roughly and forced it to a stop. The tires screamed in protest, and the metal groaned as it warped into the shape of the palms. I listened as it unnaturally bent again in a piercing moan as the figure fixed the indentions they’d created.

My windshield wipers swatted away a flood of water. Finally, I could make out my sister Rosalie, her hair dripping wet down her back like a supermodel who’d just emerged from a pool on the cover of Sports Illustrated. Her exquisite face was absolutely furious.

I gulped, feeling like a child who’d just been discovered sneaking home past curfew.

I felt uncertain as to what to do and why she’d chosen to stop me here. Surely she could wait for us to be under the cover of the garage before she chastised me. Not wanting to be drenched by the rain, I revved the engine to ask her to move aside, but the car didn’t inch forward against her strength. Beginning to feel annoyed, I revved the engine again loudly and for longer, but still, she didn’t move.

“Rose,” I hissed as I hit the brake again so that the car could roar viciously in the storm, only to be cut off by the voice of my adopted mother.

“Girls!” I couldn’t see Esme through the obscured glass behind the downpour, but even with the barrage of the rain, I could hear her lithe steps run furiously to the front porch. “Please!”

Rose’s head snapped up to look in Esme’s direction before turning to glance unhappily back at me. She stepped aside, and I sped into the garage, parking the car hastily.

I exited immediately and went to expect the damage to the front of the hood. It was only a minuscule bend from having been pushed and prodded back and forth, and I was positive Rosalie could make it look like new, though why it had been necessary to punish the car was beyond me. It wasn’t even mine.

I wheeled around once I’d heard the near-silent steps of her run, a wave of anger making me forget my guilt.

“Are you insane?!” I demanded.

“I could ask the same of you, Bella!” Now free from the obscurity of the rain, I could see in perfect detail the stunning fury of her glorious face. Her golden hair had been darkened by the rain, and it was slicked back effortlessly, like a glittering waterfall down to the middle of her back. She looked like a wrathful god, but I couldn’t find it in my stubbornness to care about how valid her anger may be.

“Okay, but did you have to take it out on the car? What did it ever do to you! You couldn’t have waited another twenty seconds to confront me? Well, you have my attention now, Rosalie, so say whatever it is you want to say!”

“You’re just unbelievable, Bella!”

“He’s not going to say anything, Rose! We already talked about this yesterday. You heard Alice! He’s not a threat to you and Emmett, so I don’t understand why you’re taking this so personally.”

“Exactly, Bella. I heard Alice. Which is precisely why I fail to understand as to why you wouldn’t understand why I’d take it so personally. After all these years of sisterhood, how can you not understand how I feel about this?”

I frowned, my forehead puckering, but still, I retained my anger. She huffed, continuing.

“If it was an inevitability, I’d understand. However, it hurts me deeply that you recognize the choice that you have. The choice that Edward has. And still, you’re willing to play with his mortality as though it were a game, when I never had that choice.”

I froze, the realization dawning on me that she was right. No matter the ways in which I tried to justify my actions or spin my intentions, she was right. Another part of my mind acknowledged that while I was aware of right and wrong, I wasn’t certain that what was right would be enough to keep me away anymore.

We stared each other down much like we had yesterday. Only today, rather than anger, her face was contorted in hurt, and mine was contorted in hopelessness.

“But… you found Emmett when he was still human…” I weakly protested, selfishly trying to highlight the irony, though I knew it was pointless as I wasn’t advocating for Edward to be changed either. That was too complicated a thought to wrap my mind around. But whatever may happen –– and I was still very much aware of the worst of possibilities –– I didn’t want my sister to hate me for it.

“He was dying, Bella,” Rosalie whispered. The anger on her face had completely faded, and in its place, pain marked her eyebrows, her full lips, her golden, sad eyes. In her sadness, she looked like a work of art, like one of those paintings of a weeping saint. “It’s not the same.”

I didn’t have a response to that, and I felt as though I was at an impasse, both with myself and with Rosalie. Because I knew the promises I’d made and broken, but I knew the promise I’d made to Edward today, and I had no willpower, no desire, and no intention to break that promise.

“You may not feel anything for him now,” Rosalie began, her eyes intently fierce as they bore into mine to warn me. Only this warning felt significantly more horrible than I’d imagined it may be, because it wasn’t made in anger, but in desperation and love. “But if Alice is right, you will. And it seems to me a horrible way to repay someone you love to steal their life, their future, their soul from them. You should leave him alone now while you still can, because once you love him… it’ll only hurt more one way or another. And you’ll have to live with that for the rest of your existence. I know I have.”

And with that, Rose turned, her face cold and sad, and she left the garage.

#equinoxjw #twilight fanfiction #twilight renaissance #twilight au #twilight fanfic #the twilight saga #twilight saga #twilight #edbella #edward cullen #bella swan #edbella fanfic

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nikatyler · 4 years ago

Photo

Adopt a Clare!

Okay, that title is a bit misleading, as some of these have a different surname, but shh. They’re all from the same legacy. They could all be a Clare.

I’ve wanted to do this for a while. There’s too many sims in this legacy and I can’t take care of all of them. Most of these stayed pretty underdeveloped and don’t even have a spouse and that’s a pity. And that’s where you come in. Would you give them a new home in your story/legacy/gameplay?

Here’s who I’d like to share:

Magnolia Clare; gen 2, daughter of Gwyneth and Vanessa. A little evil, has a special thing for robots. I’m not fully sure about her sexuality, but she’s definitely into girls.

Lantana Clare; gen 2, daughter of Gwyneth and Vanessa. Can’t tell you much about her other than she hates Magnolia. That was her most defining trait in the legacy.

Daphne Gwyneth Belle-Wolfbane; (feel free to shorten it as this is simply ridiculous - but that was the point hehe) gen 2, genetically engineered daughter of Eden and Laverne. My game made her a firefighter, but you can change that because that was random.

Romeo Clare; gen 3, son of Roxanne and Jupiter. Only wants a cuddly boyfriend and nothing else from life. I’d very much love to see if the boy’s name was Julius or Julian or even another name from the play (Tybalt? 🤔), Romeo would hate that “coincidence”. The choice is yours, but either way, this boy needs a boyfriend like crazy.

Ozzie Dream; gen 3, child of Avery and Euphoria. I can’t tell you anything else about them as I’ve never played with them. I just gave them a makeover. Also, they’re nonbinary.

Polaris Wolfbane; gen 3, son of Nebula and Orion. Same case as Ozzie, I just gave him a makeover. Half alien, half imaginary friend, even though Orion, his father, is technically a human now.

Interested in getting one (or more) of them? Cool! Just send me a message. That way, it won’t get lost. I have a few requests (rules?) though.

I mainly want to share these with my mutuals and people who actually follow my stuff. I don’t know how to word this best and I don’t want this to come off as rude, but if tumblr tells me that you only followed me a minute ago, I’ll probably be a bit hesitant about giving you the link.

Also: Please, only ask me if you’re actually going to use them in some way. It doesn’t matter when (I’m the last person who should be giving you deadlines, considering how I play and how everything takes me ages), but please, use them. Don’t just hoard them.

And obviously, don’t claim as your own, yada yada, the usual stuff.

#ts3 #sims 3 #adopt a sim #clare bpr extra

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haru-luo · 4 years ago

Audio

(”Film Festival” Call)

!Spoiler warning! : The followings contain contents for calls of Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice/Love and Producer that are yet to be released in Global server. If you do not wish to be spoiled then please refrain from going undercut.

(Note : I planned to post the call after the date but you see, tumblr is acting up again and won’t let me post the date. It keeps on showing “Problem saving post” so, it’s going to take a while before the date is uploaded. I’m so sorry, I apologize for the constant delay.)

Call - 电影节(Film Festival)

Kiro : "MC, are you home yet?"

MC : "Yep. I just opened the scoring software and rated the movie we just watched with two stars!"

Kiro : "Haha, you're so fast!"

MC : "After all, the plot of this movie is too much of a "stream of consciousness"! We watched the whole movie but in the end, I still don't get it.

MC : "I even got sleepy halfway through. I felt like I was wasting an hour and a half of my life."

Kiro : "I was wondering why there was a snoring sound beside me."

MC : "So, what did you think of the movie?"

Kiro : "Well me...I thought their poster design was pretty good."

MC : "Pff- I get it."

Kiro : "This time, when I stepped in the "trending titles", I just read the introduction before grabbing a ticket. I thought it would be a movie with a good plot."

MC : "Because most of these films are particpating in the flim festival that'll be released for the first time, the chances of "stepping on thunder" is quite high." ("Stepping on thunder"踩雷 if i'm not wrong, means "blindly adapting a trend/trending topic" I tried changing it to "trending titles" in above but I can't think of an english phrase here sorry!)

MC : "I can't but worry about the movies we have to watch in the future."

Kiro : "But on the bright side, it's actually quite exciting!"

MC : "Why do you say that?"

Kiro : "Don't you think it's a bit like opening a mystery box?"

Kiro : "Even if you're optimistic about the movie's name, poster and introduction, you can only know its true face when you sit in the movie theatre and wait until the movie begins."

Kiro : "If it's a good movie, there'll be a feeling of picking up a treasure! But if it's the opposite...."

Kiro : "Then you can only consider yourself unlucky."

MC : "Hahaha, it really becomes interesting if you're the one who says that."

MC : "Speaking of which, what movie should we watch next?"

Kiro : "A horror movie."

Kiro : "At that time, I bought the tickets without looking carefully and there were still two seats available in the front row."

Kiro : "But don't worry, Miss Chips, I'll definitely protect you!"

Kiro : "Moreover, in order not to regret our next date, I have also considered some measures."

MC : "What measures?"

Kiro : "Hehe, actually, I have already booked a highly rated restaurant near the cinema hall."

Kiro : "I've been there once before and food there is great! I've always wanted to take you out with me there to try it. Now, I've just got the opportunity."

Kiro : "That way, no matter what the quality of movie is, we'll definitely have "some other gains"!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The date that comes with this call will be uploaded later after I’m able to fix whatever this problem thing is going on! I’m so sorry!!

#does tumblr hate me? first deleting my entire victor date transcript then this..#mlqc #mr love queen's choice #mlqc kiro #mlqc call #mlqc cn #mlqc translation

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grlmoon · 4 years ago

Text

thank u for tagging me !!! @sunrisegf <33

why did you choose your URL: basically Hestia has always been an interesting and beautiful Deity to me, and i decided when i was young that i wanted to embody her warmth haha (also i love greek myth so)

any side blogs?: no no!

how long have you been on tumblr?: i’ve had this blog since 2017 but i had a small brief one before that :D

do you have a queue tag?: yes i do its “counting the moons while thinking of queue” although i dont Q things a lot

why did you start your blog?: honestly couldnt tell you, but it was during my huge PJO phase so

why did you choose your icon?: it matched my headed & is pretty :D

why did you choose your header?: the color scheme reminds me of what i think my aura looks like, tbh

whats your post with the most notes?: i have a couple cottagecore ones that went pretty big, they come and go every so often

how many followers do you have?: too many considering this is a personal blog

how many people do you follow?: a lot hehe ;)

have you ever made a shitpost?: yes,, maybe idk define shitpost

how often do you use tumblr?: everyday lolol

did you have a fight/argument with a blog once?: kinda ??? idk

how do you feel about “you need to reblog this post”?: it just depends on what it is :)

do you like tag games?: yes !!

which one of your mutuals do you think is famous?: at least half ;D

do you have a crush on a mutual?: no no no

<333444555

feel free to do this or dont !!! <333

@keihunterx @ourheartsareoldfriends @evie-leafy @nettieleaves @otembre @i-wish-i-was-a-peach

#tag game #mutuals #about me

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theonetheycallhannah · 4 years ago

Text

The Treatment of Captain Syverson-Chapter Five:Sensory Integration 1

Pairing: Captain “Sy” Syverson x OFC (Shane Benton)

Summary: A Friday full of teasing for Shane ends in a steak dinner with a blue-eyed beefcake. If you don’t finish this chapter hungry for one or the other, if not both, I haven’t done my job! Lol! (For inspo on Sy’s date outfit, think back to that one Men’s Health photoshoot Hen did and just imagine his hair shorter. That’s what I did. lol!)

Click me to catch up on the story and other stuff by Hannah!

Word Count: 4k (This date got away from me! Lol! And it’s only half over!)

Warnings: Mostly this is utter fluffy fluff, but I’m gonna put the following warnings on, anyway. Language, mature themes, alcohol consumption, borderline food worship (Shane may have a problem, I definitely do! Lol!) Also, pretty much every Sy fic I’ve read says that his given name is Logan, so...should his given name be used henceforth, that’s what I’m going with because it seems the most cannon and I like it and if it’s good enough for Wolverine...

Author’s Note: So, guys, this is crazy. First off, the reaction and love Sy and Shane’s story has been getting has taken me completely off guard and utterly made my day/week. (I’m serious. Every note makes my heart do a happy dance. A like, a reblog, a comment. It all means the world to me. Thank you for your feedback and for sharing this story.) Second, YOUR FEEDBACK MATTERS TO ME! Because initially, idk what I was thinking. I was going to skim over their first date and like…not write it…and I kept getting notes as I worked on further chapters to the tune of “can’t wait for this date!” and I thought…hmm…well, the date must be written! So, here it is, the first half-ish, of Shane and Sy’s first date. I hope it’s all you were expecting…or at least half of all you were expecting! Lol! More to come in part two of Sens Integ! (BTW, fun fact, these chapter titles are all named after treatments that therapists actually use on their patients sometimes! Lol!)

Disclaimer: Unfortunately for me, Henry is not mine, le sigh, and all mention of him, his characters, any characters from his films, or his precious doggy, Kal, are strictly for transformative and recreational use. I neither ask for, nor accept payment for the work I post on Tumblr or AO3. Unbeta’d because this is for fun and escapism.

Tags:

@onlyhenrys @cavillryarchive @summersong69 @titty-teetee @bloodyinspiredfuck @agniavateira @oddsnendsfanfics @omgkatinka@thisismysecretthirstblog

@misslaland @speakerforthedead0@tumblnewby @suavechops

Friday morning. She was up with the sun. And a bit before, really. Today was the day. Her first date with Sy. She’d taken extra care in the shower, less clumsy, thank God! She shaved her legs because she had chosen to wear a knee-length blue dress with a scoop neck and cap sleeves in wrinkle-proof Jersey knit since it would be in her tote bag all day. She was not shaving because she thought anything would happen tonight with Sy. She didn’t think she was ready.

That is, she was ready, but, only physically. Emotionally, mentally, she would need to prepare for him a bit longer before taking him as a lover. She hoped he was on the same page.

He had an appointment in the early afternoon. He greeted her with his warm “Hello, sunshine.” Following it up by telling her how pretty she looked today, causing blush to burn in her cheeks. She’d reciprocated, even though he was in his typical tee and shorts look. It was still true. They got on their usual bikes to warm up for about 15 minutes, and then took to the leg press to try to advance his strengthening.

“I’m really proud of your progress! You wouldn’t have been able to do this much weight two weeks ago!” She encouraged him.

“Yeah?”

“Absolutely. Now, we are going to do some drills next. Simple ones, but they aren’t going to be fun for you. I’ve chosen to do them on your last day of the week for a reason. You may be sore. Ice and whatever you take OTC if you must. Ibuprofen or acetaminophen. But try the ice first. It shouldn’t be too bad.”

“Okay.” He conceded, dejected.

“Stretching afterward.” She promised.

“Okay!” He pepped up. She knew he just loved an excuse to have her hands on him.

Later, as he lay on the mat, sweaty from the exertion of the drills, with her up there with him having to use her whole body to leverage the proper stretch out of his hip flexors, she felt the heavy weight of his gaze. She tried to look anywhere but those sapphire eyes below her. They were too vulnerable. She couldn’t handle that right now. Not here.

“Shane?” Dammit, he was gonna make her.

“Hmm?” She looked down at him, smile meeting smile.

“I just…” he couldn’t seem to get out the words. But she thought she understood what he was feeling.

“I know, Sy. I know.” She gently patted his outer thigh where she had been bracing her hand for the stretch, and let his leg back down, while dismounting the mat, as well.

“Well, that’s about the hour. Any questions before I let you go?”

“Are you as excited for tonight as I am?” He asked. She chuckled. She couldn’t imagine him being more excited than she was!

“Yes! Hehe! But I still kinda meant about therapy, Sy.”

“Oh, right. Are you excited to finish up with your therapy patients at therapy today so I can pick you up from the therapy clinic and take you on our date?”

“Just because you say therapy 20 times doesn’t make it about therapy.” She laughed.

“Okay, I do have a question for you, since I’m here.”

“Shoot.” She encouraged.

He stood and held her face, taking it into a kiss so devastatingly and painfully tender, she could not process what to do next. She was leaning toward fainting. But then tackling him onto the mat again seemed an attractive option. She settled for placing her hands on his waist, ready to control the situation as need arose. But after a brief moment of slight deepening, he broke away, still holding her face in his large strong hands.

“Ahem. That’s a good question. Why don’t I have you a reply later this evening?”

“Sounds good to me, sunshine.” He grinned widely, and waved a quiet goodby to her.

She walked to the doorway of the small room to watch him walk out…his gait still uneven from his injury but improving enough that she could tell he once took very…confident strides. She could almost picture it. She sighed, forgetting herself for a moment until Anita came up behind her walking her elderly patient with a gait belt and front wheeled walker.

"Is that a bit of drool on your chin, Shane?" she said quietly, but still startling the younger therapist from her reverie.

"Oh, uh, hey." she checked her chin, absentmindedly, late in getting the joke, and rolled her eyes. "Funny, Nita. Do you need anything?"

"Nope, Gladys and I are just headed to the gym for a few minutes on the NuStep to round out her treatment." Nita grinned at Shane.

"Who was that handsome young man that just left, Shane?" Gladys asked her, as women of her…demographic tended to do.

"He's just one of our patient's Miss Gladys. But I can't tell you his name. It's against the privacy policy." She explained.

"Oh, okay. Well, if I was a few years younger, I'd let ya give him MY name…and my telephone number." she smirked with pride in herself. All three ladies giggled.

"I'm pretty sure he's spoken for, Gladys." Anita broke the news to her randy patient, smirking at her coworker.

"Shame! Well, that's one lucky young lady!" Gladys hobbled on with the walker as Anita cued her not to let the device get too far ahead of her feet. Shane was beet red from the whole interaction. At least she wouldn't have to wear blush tonight.

Her day finally finished, notes done, and final communications sent, the most important (in her opinion, probably not her employer's) message of them all was next. The text to Sy that he could head toward the clinic to pick her up.

She touched up her eye makeup, applied another coat of mascara, and dabbed on some of her favorite lipstick in a deep red that complimented her skin tone. She also spritzed on a bit of her favorite Armani perfume before slipping on her dress and black ballet flats and sliding on a pair of simple hoop earrings. She'd had her hair pulled up all day in a clip, so it should be pleasantly wavy when she took it down…and with a bit of flipping, shaking out, and finger diffusing, it was.

She looked in the mirror. She was ready.

Was she ready? She examined herself in the full length mirror in the empty locker room at the clinic. The dress and the shoes suddenly seemed all wrong, both together and as individual pieces for the occasion. She looked great, it wasn't that…but…was it right for tonight? Should she cancel? Was she being ridiculous? Clearly she was, as she'd already sent the message telling Sy he could come get her. But the closer she got to being ready to go, the less ready she felt. Those butterflies were suddenly clawing at her esophagus, disrupting the bile in her stomach, and threatening to choke off her air supply. They were no longer pleasantly fluttering. She felt like she had a boot against her windpipe.

She was snapped out of the panic attack when she heard her phone go off. A message from Sy.

Your chariot, m'lady. Should I come in and get ya?

She grinned like a lunatic. How could she have considered calling tonight off?

Nay, m'lord, verily the gates be locked. I shall use the rear exit and meet thee around yonder forsooth.

Wow, you ran with that one. *laughing in tears emoji*

I have that tendency. Lol. *monocle wearing emoji*

She grabbed her bags, walked out the back door, and tossed the one that wasn't her purse into her vehicle, which was parked nearby and walked around to the front. He was standing on the sidewalk near that edge of the building.

The sun was just setting, and the light from it hit him so bewitchingly that it took away her breath. Not in the frightening way of the panic attack she'd just had, but in the nice way, like right before you surface from a deep dive and you know the sweet relief of oxygen is imminent. She assessed his ensemble with approval. Black books, sleek dark blue jeans, and a sapphire v-neck polo that even in the low light of near dusk made his blue eyes dance with vibrant intensity against his fading tan. His hair was starting to grow out ever so slightly, but it was still very close cropped. His beard, she could tell, had been finely groomed, combed, and styled. He looked…well, she'd never looked up the word "handsome" in the dictionary, but she imagined it would describe the image before her quite succinctly. And alternatively, Sy's image could be used as an illustration in the reference book, itself.

The best part, though, was the look on his face when he saw her.

She felt like he'd never properly looked at her, perhaps. Maybe he wasn't expecting a dress, or loose hair, or red lips. Or maybe it was a combo of the whole Date Shane package he was seeing before him. As his eyes beheld her, he almost looked confused. As if she was a stand-in. Or maybe an alien. Some body-snatcher. Only he wasn't frightened. She was having a hard time working out his expression as she'd really never seen it before, and particularly, never aimed in her direction. He said one word.

"Wow." It was reverent. Not a whisper. But barely a decibel above.

Again, her cheeks required no artificial pigmentation.

"Hey. You look…you certainly scrub up good, mister." she giggled nervously, feeling immensely awkward at her inability to properly compliment the chiseled image of Adonis before her. His every muscle hugged to perfection by the fabric covering it. How did you even begin to tell such perfection how perfect it was?

"You…Shane, I don't remember the last time I saw anyone look so beautiful." he frowned, as if trying to recall, then giving up with a smile, and leaning in to kiss her cheek. He lingered a moment to hug her, hold her as the day faded, breathe her in. She did the same. He was freshly showered and wearing cologne, as he often did, but it rarely hit her so solidly as it did tonight. She loved this scent. Woody, but earthy, with notes of bergamot, a kind of musky scent similar to amber, but more masculine, and something spicy that she loved. The combination exploded like an olfactory fireworks display.

The shirt was an unthinkably soft cotton (blended she thought perhaps with kitten, she could not stop touching it.) and the warmth of him radiated into her as his chest rose and fell over the course of his numerous breaths as they stood there holding each other and enjoying this feast for the senses.

"You ready for supper?" he asked, a faint but distinct rumble from his abdomen indicating that he most certainly was.

"Yes." she smiled up at him as he took her hand in his and led her to his truck. A Ford F150, the same sapphire blue as his shirt and his eyes. She was sensing a pattern, here. It wasn't the newest vehicle, but he had taken immaculate care of it. She felt shame for her own treatment of her Explorer, Bessie, which often functioned as storage shed, trash can, and sometimes, hotel, when she felt like a road trip on a shoestring budget. He walked her to the passenger side, opened the door for her, and helped her in, as the truck sat a bit higher than what she was used to.

"So, I have us a table saved at this great steakhouse just down the road. And then, it's supposed to be a nice night, I thought we could take a walk by the lake?"

It sounded perfect to her. Quiet and simple.

"Amazing. As long as your knee is up for a walk?"

"I've got all weekend to rest before getting tortured again." he smirked at her as he pulled the truck out of the parking lot and on the main road toward the interstate. "B'sides, who better to have with me if I start hurtin' than my PT?"

The emphasis he placed on the possessive pronoun, claiming her as HIS PT sent a delighted shiver through her that she blamed on the AC, which he promptly turned down.

He had his Spotify shuffling Kings of Leon at a low volume as they conversed lightly and pleasantly. Since it was an earlier model, even well equipped as it was, it wasn't quite ready for auxiliary or Bluetooth sound, so he'd bought one of those radio receivers that tune into an unused frequency and connect to your phone or iPod. She'd retrofitted her 2003 Ford Explorer in a similar fashion.

They were both caught a bit off guard when "Sex on Fire" came on, and tried valiantly to keep talking. But it was hard to hear anything but those lyrics. Singing of exhibitionism and dangerous sex acts that were definitely moving violations…and simply the sex being on fire. She was thankful, for once, that this song that she'd always found catchy without paying much attention to the actual lyrics, was now fading into the night as they pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant.

She remembered to wait for him to get the door for her, even though it had been ages since she'd been on a date or had any kind of romance whatsoever. He helped her down from her perch, giving her a gentlemanly moment to adjust her skirt before taking her hand and leading her into the building.

He opened the door and led her in by that lumbar lordosis that made everyone tremble and swoon. She was no exception just because she knew that part of your back was not actually called "the small" and she got perturbed when she heard it referred to as such.

"Welcome to Mark's, how can we help you?" the host greeted warmly.

"Reservation for Syverson." Sy piped up. She was used to being the voice in these situations. She was thankful not to have to for once. It was a small thing, but it was still nice.

"Right this way, folks." he grabbed two large menus, a mid sized one, and a small one, and led them to a cozy but still spacious two-top in a quiet corner of the dining area. The warm light was low and ambient, and there were real kerosene lamps on the tables, which she loved. It had the rustic ambiance of a cabin with all the refinement of any four+ star restaurant she'd ever been to. Not that she'd been to many.

"Here you are, the table you requested, and your menus. Have a look at them, and Katie will be out soon to answer questions and take your orders."

As he walked away, Sy pulled her chair out for her, and aided her sitting. His gentility was so refreshing to her, because it was so sincere and kind, and in no way oppressive or domineering, as some men seemed to use such gestures. Wielding them like a club rather than a feather. She was just used to seeing a certain side of him, teasing and silly as he was in therapy that this side of Captain Syverson, or as she may end up calling him one day, Logan, his given first name, if it pleased him, had taken her off guard.

"Nice place." she approved, looking around at he exposed beams of the ceiling and the iron and copper chandeliers and light fixtures on the wall. She also noticed quite curiously a copy of American Gothic by Grant Wood on one wall and The Kiss by Gustav Klimt on another. Such different styles to be displayed in one room. She really liked it though.

"It's one of my favorites. I try to come in every couple weeks or so." The fact that he liked steak on the regular was definitely a point in his favor. She loved it but rarely went out for it on her own. Eating out alone wasn't so bad, but it was hard to enjoy a steak dinner by one's self.

"What's your favorite cut?"

"Oh, I've tried most of them, and you can't go wrong." He assured her.

They had a crazy selection. Ribeyes, filets, sirloins, prime rib, all seasoned, smoked, topped and wrapped in every way you could imagine…it was like staring at the Netflix menu of steak. And much like she tended to do with Netflix, she relied on a classic favorite. After all, who goes for an obscure choice their first time at a new steak house?

"I'm keeping it simple and going for their prime rib and a baked potato."

"Ah, that's a perfect choice. We're getting some of their lobster mac and cheese to start, though. Unless you're allergic or something?" he added the disclaimer when he saw her eyes widen.

"Not at all, that sounds…"she was thinking "sexual," but decided instead on "heavenly."

Soon, Katie, a peppy, slender young redhead in black jeans she'd been poured into and a white T-shirt she had outgrown some time ago, descended upon their table with gusto.

"Howdy, I'm Katie and I get to take care of you fine folks this evening. What drinks and appetizers can I start y'all off with?"

Sy looked at Shane to prompt her to start.

"Sweet tea?" she half stated, half inquired. Katie nodded and jotted.

"Sure thing! Sir?" she thought her eyes sparkled when she looked at Sy…she couldn't blame her. But…she thought she could take her if she tried anything. She was certain there was a very sharp knife in the black napkin set-up at her right hand.

"Same for me, Katie. And we are also gonna need an order of your lobster mac to start and a bottle of your house cab."

"Fantastic. I'll be right back with the teas and wine after I put in for the lobster mac for ya, and then I'll take your meal order." she smiled brightly. Sy looked at Shane, though, as he replied "Wonderful."

~~~~~~~

Her instincts about the lobster mac and cheese had been spot on. She couldn’t contain her yummy noises of enjoyment which amused Sy to no end. She couldn’t imagine the steak any better.

About that, she had been completely wrong. It was so succulent, tender, and flavorful, she debated on whether or not the provided au jus and horseradish were even needed. They were also too good to resist, though.

Her potato, twice baked to the perfect tenderness had a salt brined skin, and a garlicky butter that just sung with the sour cream and chives. She was in food heaven, and even if that meant she was dead, it was fine.

He’d ordered the same entrée as she had, but took his baked potato…a bit differently.

“You don’t like sour cream?” She asked, nonplussed.

“Nah, I mean, I can eat it, but…it feels weird in my mouth. I prefer the au jus and butter, instead. It’s much more tasty.” He said, waggling his eyebrows.

“I guess I’ll take your word for it.” She laughed.

“You’re welcome to try mine when I get it all doctored you how I like it!”

She did, right from his fork. And he was right about it being so flavorful, but she preferred the mild, creamier texture of her own side with the savory notes of her steak.

They ate and enjoyed each other’s company and conversation.

“Ya know, Sy, I totally had you pegged as a beer man, instead of a wine guy.” She said, as she brought her own glass of the deep red liquid to her mouth and nose, inhaling the bouquet before she took her sip.

“Normally, you’d be right. With a burger, pizza, sometimes tacos or what not, definitely. But I can’t do beer with steak. It’s gotta be wine. Red. And full-bodied.” He held her gaze as he drank from his own glass. Why did he have to look at her like that when he said those kinds of words? Her cheeks were warm from more than the booze.

For desert, they shared a decadent marbled brownie/blondie a la mode. He’d had the idea to slide his chair so he was sharing a corner of the table with her, rather than looking across it at her. Purely so they didn’t have to keep sliding the dessert…not so their knees would brush against one another now and then, or so they could feel the heat radiating from one another’s bodies…but actually, exactly for those reasons.

“Last bite is to you, Sy.” She set her fork down, full to bursting.

“Are you kiddin’? My mama’d tan my hide if she knew I took the last bite from my date.”

“You’re being gallant, actually! Rescuing me from a certain belly ache.” She patted her small but slightly rounded tummy. She did like her food, and was no gym rat, after all. He didn't seemed to mind. Yet.

“How 'bout we share the last bite?” He suggested.

“Technically that’s not physically possible. Becau…”

He interrupted what was going to be an intellectual explanation of why no matter how small you cut up a bite, the remaining bit was still technically one bite, and couldn’t be shared.

“No. Shh. I know you’re smart. You got nothin’ to prove here. I’m gonna cut what’s left in half until I get a bite you’re willing to take. Okay?” She nodded.

He only had to take the fork to it twice before she conceded, also letting him feed her, feigning paralysis from the food coma. She held the fork tightly between her lips, making him work to pull it from her mouth. She looked innocent, but she was an intentional little shit.

“You're so cute when you eat.”

“Said no one ever!” She held her hand over her face.

“You are, though. You enjoy the food. Experience it. It’s like you’re…getting a story from it, or something. Like it’s…almost like it’s entertaining you, I don’t know. It’s just…beautiful.” He leaned his elbow onto the table, supporting his head in his hand as he looked at her.

"Well, sometimes I think I like food a little TOO much for my own good." she lamented, reaching for the cabernet only to have it snatched by her date. He uncorked it and dispensed a generous pour for her, and topped off his own glass, killing the bottle.

"No such thing. Like I said about the wine, full bodied is the way to go. Nothin' wrong with a little cushion." he winked at her. She could not resist finishing a rhyme she'd always heard about the desirability of curvy girls…for the pushin,' and hoped the flush in her cheeks from the wine was enough to disguise the deepening color from the current blush she was feeling thinking of Sy…pushin' her cushions…but something tipped him off to her distraction.

"What's on yer mind, sunshine?"

"I'm wondering if you're prepared to carry me on this walk we're planning, actually." It was possible to think more than one thing, after all. "I don't know how I'll ever even walk again."

"Ah, give it fifteen minutes. Finish up your sweet tea, and by the time we're done with our walk, you'll want an ice cream cone."

"Ha, doubtful." But she was ashamed to admit, ice cream already didn't sound bad. Vanilla…maybe pistachio….no, coffee! In a waffle cone…with fudge drizzle…and almonds…maybe she had a problem.

"You ready to go?" he asked.

She nodded. He flagged down Katie and gave her cash, and what one might call a benevolent tip. They left the warm steakhouse, and entered the breezy late summer evening, the humid air seeming thick with promises.

Up Next: Chapter Six-Sensory Integration 2

#netflix sand castle #sand castle #captain syverson #captain syverson fanfic #captain syverson x ofc #henry cavill #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill x ofc

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jeongjaebae · 3 years ago

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first of all ! thank you for understanding :( that means a lot to me. and dont worry ! i actually love recieving messages, its just replying drains me for some reason ??

but no thats totally okay ! everyone else in tbz are bias wreckers so im fine reading them too ! (although some sickeningly sweet changmin fluff would be nice @-@ LMAO JKJK) and yes i have seen q's recent photos ! gosh and those photos w chanhee ? two pretty best friends... and same ! and the effects in kick concept makes it feel like im a daze from the rides! uh well id like to think both ? ive been a casual listener (wanting to stan) back in no air era ! but ever since kingdom ive been "obsessed" if you'd call it ! hby ? when did you consider yourself as a deobi ? gosh.. ig e2l ?? but more as like rivals to lovers ! although, i like all those aus you mentioned. wait !! that au actually seems so interesting and fun to read ! if you were to start writing it again ill 100% read it ! even its not on tumblr !

hm, i'd like to say i would read most things ! im into magical aus to even clichés ! im sure there are more things i can list but ones i would rather stay away from are things like yandere, mafia, the alpha/omega/hybrid thing ? i forgot the actual term.. and surprisingly enough vampire/werwolves. and smuts ! nothing wrong w them just not my style yk ? anyways, on the topic of tropes! if you had to choose one trope for you to experience, which one would you choose ? -🐿

did you see the thrill ride announcement oh my gooodfkafjkda

no worries! i totally get it ahaha esp with work/school emails... ugh it's difficult replying to those 😭

hmm sickeningly sweet changmin fluff eh? i'll brainstorm LOL but changmin himself is someone so mysterious to me, like i can't seem to grasp his personality?? half the group is a mystery to me and that's probably why i haven't written all the members yet! but anyway, this is totally changmin's eraaa that boy is looking fiiiine and yes i love the bestie photos!! oooh omg what did you think of kingdom? any fave performances? i was eyeing tbz sometime between rtk and stealer era but it wasn't until i saw their mama2020 performance that i became fully obsessed, literally that performance was my oh moment hehe. and i didn't even have a bias but some random comment planted the idea of juyeon in my head and then i realized he looked so familiar for some reason? (turns out he looks like my ex crush aldkfjak.) do/did you you stan any other groups or soloists? what kind of concepts or music styles do you like? and omg e2l is fun, i've always been team bffs to lovers so haven't written enemies or rivals to lovers much but these days it's definitely grown on me!! and yesss i'll get back to writing that soulmates au eventually and the tbz version would be on tumblr dw!

ooh ok the things you listed are pretty much the things i would also stay away from LOL. kinda feel like they're difficult to write well? so kudos to those who can do it. and ooh interesting question!! TBH. i've always wanted to experience fake dating!!! i feel like this doesn't occur much irl but it would be so much fun to pretend to be together and then suddenly everything feels way too real ahhhh. what about you? aaand are you a writer yourself? 👀

#🐿️ anon #hope you have a good day/night!!! <3 #drink water!! stay healthy!!!!#ask

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bunnyinthestars · 5 years ago

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Why we should have known Alix’s importance as essentially the in-show keeper of the Love Square the second we first saw her, and how we can use her character design to predict what will happen for the Love Square

*an analysis/exploration of her character design*

WARNING: spoilers for a couple season 3 episodes, including Desperada, Ikari Gozen, and Miracle Queen. Honestly, if you haven’t watched any of those episodes yet, I highly recommend them, they’re really good

Ok so, today, as I was drawing Alix and therefore thinking about her appearance, I realized that basically her entire physical character design has elements of the Love Square to it. I searched tumblr trying to find someone who posted about this but I couldn’t, so here we go bois. Sorry if I missed anyone’s post about this, I’m still kinda new to tumblr and I’m just trying to share my thoughts with the fandom!

There are gonna be three elements of her design I talk about: her hairstyle, her coloring, and the details on her clothing.

First off, I would like to start with her hairstyle.

Her hairstyle is iconic for its uniqueness— pretty wild, short, with a pigtail on one side and loose hair on the other. BUT GUYS. HER HAIR IS LITERALLY HALF LADYBUG’S, HALF CHAT NOIR’S.

Let me explain—

If you look at the images above, you can see precisely what I mean.

On the left side of Alix’s face (when we, the audience, look at her, not her own left), we can see Alix’s bangs are parted exactly the way Marinette/LB’s bangs are, plus she has Mari’s pigtail. On the right half, we can see the middle piece of Chat Noir’s bangs that is pointed toward/in his face, plus the rest of his hair that alternatively points outward (sorry if that wording was confusing, there’s a reason i’m not a writer, it’s easier to see in the photos). ALIX’S HAIRSTYLE ALONE IS QUITE LITERALLY HALF LADYBUG AND HALF CHAT NOIR. I AM NOT OK.

Alright. Ok. As if that alone hasn’t made me lose my mind, there’s more. Before we get into her outfit, I want to just quickly address Alix’s coloring itself.

Alix has pink hair and blue eyes, and her clothes are black, green, pink, and red.

The pink hair and blue eyes can easily be attributed to Marinette/Ladybug, since Marinette’s clothes and room are majorly pink, her transformation sequence and powers all have pink backgrounds, and pink is a variation of red, which is Ladybug’s main color. Marinette also has blue eyes (and blue hair, but I don’t know if it’s blue in-universe or black).

On the other hand, the black and green on Alix’s shirt can be attributed, of course, to Chat Noir, who’s entire color scheme is black with accents of lime green. Adrien also shows hints of these colors in his design, but that’s a completely different subject.

For the rest of her look, Alix’s shorts are almost all black, except for the red decal on the back pockets, and her socks and shoes are a mix of Mari/LB’s and Adrien/CN’s colors.

To sum it up, from head to toes we have Mari on Alix’s head, Adrien on her upper torso, and a mix of the two from the lower torso down. It is worth noting that the reasons Mari’s colors are Alix’s head and Adrien’s colors are on Alix’s shirt is that, throughout the series, it is established that Mari is associated with using her head, and Adrien is associated with preferring his heart. (This has been explocitly referenced in episodes like Lady Wifi (s1) and Ladybug (s3).) Therefore, Mari’s coloring being on Alix’s head—which is what Mari is associated with—and Adrien’s coloring on her shirt being closest to her heart—which he is associated with—makes total sense.

Ok ok ok. This is the last point I have to make, but also kinda the most complicated to explain, so bear with me here.

(sorry i keep using this same photo, it just shows a lot of what i’m trying to show you guys and i’m to lazy to find another photo hehe)

In the photo on the left, if you look by her wrist, you can see a snake head, and you can see the shape of the snake body trailing around her arms. The scale print even further adds to this.

So a snake. The immediate thing that comes to mind is the snake miraculous. If you’ll remember the episode Desperada (s3), the snake miraculous was originally given to Adrien, who transformed into Aspik, but then Adrien learned that he was unsuccessful as Aspik because he couldnt be Chat Noir at the same time, and his role as Chat Noir was essential to the success of the team, so Luka became the next (and way more successful) holder of the snake miraculous, Viperion. The other relevance of the snake miraculous was in Miracle Queen (s3 finale), when Chat Noir merged the black cat miraculous and snake miraculous (Snake Noir). The colors of the snake are also the same colors of Chat Noir, but black is Chat Noir’s more primary color while green is the snake’s more primary color.

(side note: When Luka holds the miraculous, the tones of the green color shift from a lime green to a more blue-green, which shows his individuality/difference from Adrien being expressed in the miraculous, similarly to how Ryuko’s coloring is more of an orange-toned red than Marinette’s as Ladybug/Dragonbug. This isn’t quite important to this analysis, I just thought it was interesting, whoops!)

For the photo on the right, I know the photo isn’t very clear, but I just couldn’t quite find a clear photo of the red snake decal on the back pockets of Alix’s shorts. For context, in the Chinese zodiac (where the second level of the miraculous originate), dragons don’t have wings (the wings thing came from western culture), and so they look similarly to the shape of a snake because they are long, thin, flexible, and have scales. Therefore, it’s reasonable to assume that this snake-like outline in red on the pockets of Alix’s shorts could also be meant to resemble a dragon. This makes a ton of sense when we consider how the snake and the dragon are pictured together in the show, and the colors typically associated with either.

The dragon’s relevance is presented in a similar manner to the snake’s, only Marinette doesn’t try to use the dragon (excluding Kwami Buster) until Miracle Queen, when she becomes Dragonbug (and Chat Noir becomes Snake Noir). Kagami, however, is meant to be Marinette’s “rival” for being Adrien’s love interest, and Kagami is the one who ends up getting the dragon miraculous and transforming into Ryuko for the first time in Ikari Gozen (s3).

Luka is meant to be a altered reflection of Adrien, and Kagami is meant to be an altered reflection of Marinette. This is why the miraculouses that Luka and Kagami are given are also the same ones Marinette and Adrien unify in Miracle Queen, and why the color schemes are the way they are. Their roles in terms of the writing of the show are only meant to be a psyche-out Adrinette for both Mari and Adrien. The balance is almost there, but not quite. This can be seen in their own character designs, but again, that’s a whole other thing. Their roles in the show, though, are essential to bring Adrinette together. In Miracle Queen, Luka and Marinette are established as an item, and Kagami and Adrien are established as an item. In the same episode, Dragonbug and Snake Noir themselves even foreshadows the separation of Luka & Adrien and Marinette & Kagami being unified into just Adrien and just Marinette themselves. A better way of saying that is that the qualities Mari likes about Luka will become things either Adrien grows into or that she’ll find in him, and the same thing with Kagami and Marinette for Adrien, which will lead to them becoming a couple. This is why they’re included in Alix’s design, if we can agree that Alix’s design is meant to represent their journey into becoming a couple.

Man, am I tired from finding the words to explain that. Hopefully it makes sense!!

So, to summarize everything, not only do Alix’s hair and general coloring have direct traces of LB and CN, but also the snake and the dragon, who can be represented by both Adrien & Luka (snake) and Marinette & Kagami (dragon), and can be used to determine that Luka and Kagami’s roles in the show hold the key to the Love Square becoming canon.

So. Yes. Alix’s design, once I realized all this, has been driving me crazy. I MEAN SERIOUSLY. She is a literal human representation of the Love Square.

#alix kubdel #ml alix #the love square #love square #throwback to 2016 when the love square was also called the lucky charm #is it still called that?? i havent seen that at all #you know what ill just tag it anyway whatever lets be obscure #lucky charm #and yes ive been in the fandom that long even though im new to having a tumblr account no i do not know how its been so long #adrienette #adrinette #lukagami #alix kubdel theory #alix kubdel analysis #miraculous: tales of ladybug and chat noir #miraculous ladybug #miraculous ladybug analysis #miraculous ladybug theory #alix character design #alix kubdel character design #snake noir #dragonbug #wait shit is dragonbug two words or one #dragon bug #miracle queen #ml ryuko #viperion #miracle queen theory #analysis #im sorry im new to tumblr and sorry if the new to tumblr thing is a stereotype im just not good at existing

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immortalfornow · 4 years ago

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ask game!

I was tagged by @fandomfishbish, my very cool mutual (thanks, by the way! this was fun and your answers were interesting!). The rules are pretty simple: answer 30 questions, tag some people you’d like to get to know better (it’s supposed to be 20 but I am pretty new to tumblr so I probably won’t tag very many)

Name/Nickname: I go by Jordyn on the internet bc there are creeps and my real name is unique enough that putting it out there makes me nervous lol

Gender: hmm...good question. afab but going through a gender crisis lately so ???? I use she/her pronouns for now though

Star sign: scorpio :) I promise I’m not evil though haha

Height: 5′5 and I’m proud of it bc I am taller than my mom which means I am a GIANT

Time: I am in pacific standard time

Birthday: November 17!

Favorite bands: oh no I listen to so many bands I could not tell you my favorite to save my life. top 3 rn are probably mother mother, twenty one pilots, and idkhow but that will probably different by tommorow morning so don’t quote me on it

Favorite solo artist: erm probably the narcissist cookbook but there’s so many good artists idk

Song stuck in my head: all of them all the time lol

Last movie: the brainwashing of my dad. it’s a documentary on amazon prime about how the right hooks regular people and radicalizes them. it was really interesting!

Last show: atla, I think. I’m tryna watch it all so I can watch legend of korra

When did I create this blog: err sometime in late 2020 I think. I was on here earlier, but I deleted my old blog a couple years ago and 2020 just got too boring so I came back and started over and now I have this tiny lil blog

What do I post: mostly just random reblogs. a lot of stuff from podcasts, but it’s honestly just whatever I think is cool and that shifts around a lot

Last thing I googled: auskbdhieulrp my mom was convinced that there was a song called what’s up supercat so I spent half an hour trying to find that only to come to the unfortunate realization that it was actually a song called what’s new pussycat that is much less cool than she remembered and not very good at all

Do I get asks: not really bc I have very few followers but oh well

Why I chose my url: it’s my url on another site and I wanted something easy to remember lol

How many blogs do I follow: 77 bc I haven’t properly re-explored tumblr yet

How many followers I have: it’s a secret hehe

Average hours of sleep: swings wildly between 2 hours and 9

Lucky number: hmm idk but my favorite number is 9 bc it’s 3 cubed and that’s just neat

Instruments: I used to be able to play viola and clarinet but it’s been a while. I’m trying to teach myself piano right now though

What am I wearing: jeans and a black shirt bc today has been A Day

Dream job: I’d like to be a therapist and a photographer on the side. landscape photography is my little pipe dream I’ve had for ages, but I also really want to help people!

Dream trip: I have no idea!!!! I haven’t really been able to travel much so going literally anywhere would make me happy, I think

Last book I read: A horrible romance novel that my sister is really into lol

Favorite food: hmm there’s too many options

Nationality: American, unfortunately

Favorite song: hmm right now probably that bitch by bea miller bc it’s just very good and I love angry women haha

Top three fictional universes: again, my likes shift rapidly so don’t quote me on this later lol. but probably star trek would be one just bc there’s just so much possible and I think that’s really cool (though I haven’t watched a ton of it), the dndads universe bc it brings me comfort, and (assuming I can pick a game, which I have decided I can) the subnautica universe bc there’s so much to explore and its lore is so interesting. minecraft almost beat subnautica just bc I know so much random stuff about it (especially considering that I don’t really play it), but subnautica is so pretty that I had to put it on the list

What is something you like about yourself? I like how curious and open minded I am about the world. I think it enriches my life and the life of people around me, and it’s a good trait to have.

hmmm I have absolutely no idea who to tag bc I don’t know a lot of people on here. definitely @soresorelungs, bc idk much about you but you seem cool (no pressure though! you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to!). other than that, anyone who sees this and wants to do it can say I tagged them :)

#actually though @fandomfishbish thanks so much for the tag #this was great!!!#also #if anyone ever has random questions they wanna ask me I'm 100% down #just send me an ask or a dm :)#sorry so many of the answers are noncommittal but so am I lol

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seoschangbin · 5 years ago

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Hi hi, it’s ya gal Rachel! To start off, this isn't really a follow forever but more of a mushy love fest. I was going to do this back in October when my blog hit 2 years but then with everything that happened... 😞✌ figured it wasn’t the best time! But since it’s the new year, I just wanted to spread some love to start off the decade, especially towards all the lovely people who have made my 2019 a little bit happier ♡ Thank you to everyone for making this such a fun & amazing year; thank you for supporting my gifs & graphics and interacting with me; overall, thank you for making Tumblr fun again! So to all my moots and followers, I’m wishing you all a very happy and wonderful 2020!

I wanted to take some time as well to write some messages to all my mutuals - seeing you guys on my dash + all your work (if you’re a cc) is such a joy and I admire all of you very very much! Thank you for putting in the time to making gifs/graphics/fic/etc. and I hope you won’t mind if I gush about you a little, even if we’ve never spoken hehe! Under the cut in alphabetic order.. she’s a long one sorry!

@00hj | karen!! angel!! first of all, everything u make is just the cleanest cutest thing ever, i truly want your brain!.. u are such an incredibly talented gfx creator and i get heart palpitations every time i see ur work!! i adore u so much n ur tags are also so full of sweetness n purity and 😞💕 i just want to give u a hug!! + the way u always say hi to ccs in ur tags when u rb their stuff. cute!! pure!!

@01degree | joanna!! first of all... thank u for filling my dash with so many groups, some of which i almost never get to see 😌💕 ur brain being multi af like me.. chefs kiss! also! you make such clean and nice gifs please don’t ever doubt that laskjd!! 2020 joanna stops saying her gifs suck! idk how u make them so clean but legends only! bls remember to be kind to yourself this year! 💕

@1095 | nicolle!! i haven’t seen you around recently but i hope everything is okay and you’re doing well! i have to say that your graphics are absolutely INSANE i don’t know how you do it!! the colours.. how it all comes together.. amazing! ur career as a graphic designer will be a good one 😌👍 secondly your urls are always so cute nd nice!! and thirdly back to number 1.. i just love everything you make so so much bls come back to us 😖

@3noracha | falak.. ur the fandom’s gem.. the sharpening on ur gifs takes my breath away everytime + the colouring.. omg chef’s kiss!! i didn’t know you before you came back earlier this year but i’m so so glad you did come back bc u are so full of love 😳💗 you make the cutest graphics as well and are just radiate so much positivity 💞

@bamgchan | henri! still my confident car selfie king!! so glad i found you through sagey.. i love all your content (ur graphics.. always so well put together!) and the way you interact with people is so full of energy and positivity and i adore that! i hope 2020 treats you well 🥰

@banghans | ollie!! all of ur content.. ur gifs! amazing.. wonderful.. iconic thank you for providing so much hq content for the rest of us peasants 😌💕 your love for chan and jisung is also so pure n cute when u rave abt it 💞 bls stop being so hard on yourself and i love reading about how you’re always striving to be better to yourself! i hope 2020 is a good year for you 💖

@binnieseason | emily.. a loss for binnie stans that you’re gone 😔 anyways i hope to see you back sometime because you make such nice gifs + the colouring on them.. so pretty and clean.. how to be you! i hope things are okay with you and that you’ve been well!

@cb-97s | miss li! y/a novel protagonist herself!! li you’re a burst of sunshine in my day and i love chatting w u! your love for chan.. too pure 😭 every time i talk to you i’m like.. dang.. she’s real.. ppl get to see her for real! might force u to meet me irl 🤷‍♀️ also queen of gfx.. always so clean.. 😍 i know it’s been a stressful year for you but i hope 2020 brings you happiness and love 💞 love u!

@changbeanie | hi ruby! ur graphics are always so intricate n pretty + the colouring on ur gifs.. so pretty 😭💖 thank you for providing like 90% of the changbin content nd keeping me well-fed 🥰 ur always so sweet to ur anons as well and are just a lil ray of sunshine ☀️

@changbinie | jo.. what even is there to say abt u.. still can’t believe i got u into skz.. CAN’T!!! thanks for suffering w me and dealin w me wakin u to talk abt middies.. + changbin arms.. i love u a little i think (?)

@channie | hi fishy! ur one of the very first skz blogs i ever followed back in 2017.. we ancient 😌🤙 i know you’re not too active anymore but all of your gifs have like. the prettiest colouring ever idk how you do it! i hope you’ll come back to us

@elfminho | min! i love the way u tag skz in your tags.. so cute 😭 star boy!!! cute 😭 ur gifs are also lovely as well 🥰 i think ur one of the first skz blogs i followed when i starting using this blog again n i’m glad i found ur blog bc i adore u 💞

@glowsvt | grace.. my little baby! i wish i could just !! get into ur brain how lovely nd wonderful of a human you are.. have more confidence in yourself! 😣 you make wonderful graphics.. ur style! cute! and you have such a sweet and good heart!! i love when you ramble about things and always appreciate how you take the time to reach out to me despite how busy you are 💕 thank you for being a real-life angel, i hope 2020 is good and kind to you 🙇‍♀️💞

@hanjisungz | britt!!! nerd squad let’s go!! you’re such an angel, the way you treat everyone who talks to you with so much kindness and positivity makes me want to cry!! ur truly just the cutest sunbeam and just such lovely lovely human!! thank u for puttin up with my late replies and how boring i am 😭 i also adore your gifs and icons.. which you know.. but always.. chefs kiss to them!

@huiracha | marie... first of all skz AND ptg? great, amazing, fantastic combination... galaxy brain 💞 secondly, u make such SUCH nice gifs 😭 ur prob one of my fav skz ccs and all ur pretty chan comp sets.. always look forward to them! thank u for also bringing me ptg content i never see enough of them 💕

@hwang-hyunjin | agnes!! ur topaz settings r always insane and they make your gifs look amazing!! + the colouring u do is always so beautiful!! the combo rly makes ur gifs so distinctive nd pretty💞 ur edits too!! just lovely 🥰 also the fact that we’re also moots on our mx blogs.. amazing.. i love a staybebe!!

@hyunjins | godleigh???? still one of my fav gifmakers ever!! perfect colouring.. sharpening.. best brain! 💞 rmbr ur skz x prince series... still think abt it sometimes.. wish i could be half as brilliant as u! i’m so glad we started talking bc u are incredibly funny and fun to talk to and i love witnessing ur breakdowns even though they’re probably way funnier to me than they should be 😭 love that u vibe w me and we can be mean together 😭 thank u for giving me this url 😭 thank u for being my friend, u truly are like. half the reason i enjoy being on this blog 😭 you’re wonderful and i love u a lot! sorry for clowning u sometimes! i hope everything sorts itself out soon bc u deserve some peace nd happiness 😩 and i wish u nothing but the best for this year and hope that the next year will be filled with good things 💖

@ifbin | mikaela.... u know i could talk abt you forever right???? ur graphics.. bro 😭 literally my fav gfx ever on this site.. u have such a vibrant + clean style it’s so sexy 😭 literally am in love with everything u make.. every time i see it i’m like 😳💖 also you’re such a sweetheart in your tags i can’t with you... spare friendship miss 💍

@jeonginz | bri! honestly.. i think you’re my oldest mutual from when we first started our blogs during survival era #ogs? 😳 when i found out you were nctmark... mind blown... anyways all your content is AMAZING even though u dont make as much for skz anymore msdg but ur dedication to all ur sideblogs.. galaxy brain 😌

@jinlix | kelly...!! still gazing at u across the river i love love love u!! how to purchase friendship? ur just the purest snowflake and a wonderful person with the cutest tags... ur love for hyunjin.. CUTE 💞 all your graphics are so pretty and clean as well.. dragonlix gfx never forgotten.. 😳 and you’re rly just a little angel!! 💞

@kim-woojins | emma, i know that you’re gone and closed pretty much but if you come back to this! just wanted to let you know that you were my fav woojin cc and i hope you’ll consider coming back someday 💖 your gifs.. always amazing! plus, you’re such a kind person and i hope everything is okay with you and things have settled a bit! sending you lots of love 💕

@kittylixie | moon.. honestly one day i just started seeing ur content everywhere.. ur gifs are so clean and pretty and just! mwah! you’re always so quick to gif as well i don’t know how you to do it! all the stuff you choose to gif as well.. best moments 💖

@kmwoojins | sagey.... still don’t really know how i came to be following you! 😩 but i’m so happy i am because you are so pure and sweet and i adore adore adore you!! 💞 love how welcoming and lovely you are as a human and still laugh every time i think about how shocked you are about jo and i... 😌 anyways i adore your graphics and you, thank you for just being such a lovely human, you were a wonderful part of my year 💖

@leeminho-s | hi lia! i know we only became moots recently but all your gifs.. so pretty 😳 and we never have enough minho content.. thank you for providing 😫 i’m sorry i don’t know much about you yet but i just wanted to say i admire your gifs so much and hope you have a wonderful start to the new year!

@minknows | hi thien! first of all.. your name.. so lovely 😳 secondly.. the colouring on your gifs is always so pretty and good 😭❤ the sharpening too.. 😔 just!! chefs kiss to it all, would take a class on how to gif from you 🙇‍♀️

@nochous | dez!! we haven’t interacted much on this sb of mine but hehe i loved our convo on my sf9 blog.. still always thinkin abt you calling kun daddy 😭 you’re such a fun person to talk to and i hope everything is okay with you since you’ve gone on a semi-hiatus! i hope we’ll have another chance to talk soon, sending you some good energy for 2020 💗

@prodskz | hi neha! i feel like you took a hiatus sometime this year (??) where i didn’t see you on much but i’m happy to see you a little more active on here now!! u provide such nice content + for some reason i rly rly love your icon 😭💗

@realstraykids | miss em.. secret santa FATED us 😔💕 anyways i adore you, we are the core of fantastay culture and this will forever unite us 😌 i’m vibrating at the thought of their comeback 😖 ANYWAYS you are such a friendly and lovely person and i enjoyed getting to talk with u so much over the past couple of weeks 💖 you’re one of my fav gifmakers honestly your mv aesthetics swap.. as i said.. 😭 amazing iconic showstopping! + the colouring on all your gifs.. so pretty 😭

@seungminhos | to quote you. you are far too funny to be a gifmaker 😣 but then who would provide all the good seungmin content.. 😞 you’re such a force of nature on my dash and i love reading all your thoughts bc you are Funny.. and your love for seungmin + how you always want the best for him is pure!! our sporadic interactions too.. always enjoy them 💕 even though i know you’re stressed about being on here sometimes, i want you to know that you’re wonderful and i appreciate all you do to bring more seungmin on our dashes 💗 pls stop threatening to delete your blog, i would be devastated 😫

@seungminsmile | aurora!! the one time i was about to have a seungmin breakdown and went to you... hehe you’re such a cutie and very grounded person (imo!!) and you make the cutest little graphics.. the little doodles.. how do you do that!! 😳 and now that you’re making gifs.. Queen! i hope your first semester went well! 💕

@seunie | hello nia!! i know we are still new moots but you are such a pure soul.. just ur blog title.. angel! you radiate so much love and sweetness 💞 your gifs are always so vibrant + colourful as well and bring a bit of colour onto my dash just like you! hopefully we can speak in the coming year, i wish you the very best! 🥰

@skzbffie | rayana... all ur gifs... bro.... how to start a rayana religion... amazing 😍 ur gifs are always so clean + i can recognize them by the subtitle font you use.. u always choose the best moments to gif honestly how to be u! honestly ur tags are fun to read too don’t judge me i am just an admirer and fan of u 😭

@skznta | miss sierra! idk how to put it into words but you... goddess of goodness? you truly radiate so much positivity and happiness and it makes me so.. uwu (for lack of better words).. you’re so so cute over all your love for science and i’m glad we got to bond over that! the way you’re always striving to learn more + improve yourself.. u inspire me 😳 you are also an incredible cc and thank you for bringing so much joy into the fandom and my life!! i feel very grateful to have gotten to know you a little this year 💞

@thechanboys | jem.. u are a GEM... 😭 the way i got u for secret santa i’ll never get over it!! you are just such sunshine and so fun to talk to and 😳💞 if u ever wanna abandon bin for me.. 😌 my fav number one chan/bin stan..! i’m so happy you got into skz this year and i’m gonna try my hardest to get you into some other groups hehe 🤧 anyways, you are incredible, lovely, wonderful, amazing i love u jem!! 💖

@tinyjisung | bea! honestly.. we are moots on like 3(?) blogs our multi selves.. galaxy brain... i know ur more active on ur ateez blog but i wanted to write abt you here anyways because I CAN! 😌 but i love all that good san content you provide + you just seem like a very calm n fun person 💕

@virgolix | nina. you’re such a cute person filled with love and you just spread so much positivity and good energy! you treat everyone with so much kindness and it’s so nice to see 💖 and if i can rave about your gifs for a minute... they are unreal 😫 the sharpening.. colouring.. always so amazingly clean + pretty + vibrant!

@wonstal | hi hi! okay.. i adore all your content, you have the cutest colouring ever!! + topaz settings.. so pretty 😖💞 even though we started off as moots on my mx blog, i’m so glad you got into skz and ateez + will be on your sweet merry way to sf9 soon 🤞 i’m glad we’ve just started chatting a bit because you seem super fun and i’m excited to get to know you better! i hope 2020 treats you well darling 💖

@yongbells | iana.. hope everything is okay with you always and sending you lots of love! i miss seeing you on here but i hope you’re taking good care of yourself 💗 also.. gfx queen... 😖 you’re SUCH a ray of sunshine.. the way you always tell people how much you love their creations is so kind and all of your own gfx are some of the most beautiful things ever 💖 we are so blessed to have you in this fandom 😩

#rachel.txt #oh man.. this took me a while to write but i hope u guys are oke w my messages 😭#i adore u all v v much and sending u all warm wishes for the new year + new decade!!#thank u all for making this my fav sideblog #+ to my followers i love u all and wish u the best year yet as well 💖#if i missed anyone.. bls feel free to shoot me in the head #if we're moots + ur not here i missed u bc i am an idiot. bls dm me immediately so i can tell u how much i love u

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