#also canonically hot does not mean the others look bad lmao

[tojjist]

“At Least” S. Gojo

☆ genre: angst to fluff (kinda)

☆ pairings: Gojo Satoru x f! reader

☆ summary: After Geto left, nothing has been the same. Especially not your relationship with Gojo Satoru. Once you decide to move to Kyoto for good, Gojo is less than pleased. But fate does not seem to want to let you go.

☆ cw: mentions of sex, depressed gojo, not spoiler free, hopping between timelines but like i added non-canon events, smoking, drinking, getting drunk, high school Gojo being a high school boy, cussing, mentions of drunk sex but it doesn’t happen, mentions character death (from the anime), gojo satoru (yes that's a trigger warning).

☆ wc : 5.6k

☆ a/n: this has been in the doing for so long? I've been waiting to have the chance to upload it for maybe a year now smh. Also was originally written for an irl of mine lmao

“Oh my god,” you emphasize each word, pushing the wooden chair away with your knee. “Satoru, is it yours?”

His black pupils, lined with iris the color of morning skies, study your figure from behind the shaded glasses, pink lips quirking slightly upwards in approval of your attention.

“Nah, it's only staying with me for a week,” he stated, watching nervously as you strode over to him. “His owner is away for some business.”

Your attention remained fixed on the pet in Satoru's long, long arms. Your face lit up when a bark escaped the infant animal. “Can I hold it?”

Satoru watched over you carefully, pleading eyes coming in line with his blues. You make it hard to say anything other than an immediate yes, but he tries to stretch out the conversation to his best ability.

“It's 400 yen for 10 minutes,” he muttered, sarcasm dripping from his words. He earned a look of amusement from you; a small victory. He then braced himself for the next part. Satoru bent down, meeting you eye-to-eye, and noticed your breath catching in anticipation. “Or... you can shorten your skirt.”

Your face took no time to grow hot, not giving any verbal answer besides the blank expression you stare at him with. For a second, Gojo let himself think he's the victor of this little challenge he started in his head. But he soon came to realize how grave of a mistake he's made.

You're not flustered, you're angry.

“You're such a fucking pervert,” you fume, eyes glaring daggers. He dares not move, noticing the way your eyes flutter over his face.

“You're truly unbelievable,” the shorter male chuckled, making sure he didn't bump into Satoru's now-bruised arm. “What were you even thinking?”

“I thought it was funny, y'know?” He huffed in response. Gojo's fingers ran through his own bright locks as he took a seat on the wood hung up by metal chains. "Besides, has she always been this strong? Physically, I mean."

Geto stared into the reddish sky of dusk, placing himself into a swing in turn and kicking the air so the swing would start moving. "I don't know. Girls are really full of surprises.”

He never thought, not in a million years, things would come to this. Ever since Gojo's last encounter with Geto after he, well, changed... Gojo became unable to face anyone quite the same way he did before.

How did he get here? How did things escalate to this? Thinking about it, Geto had shown signs of a change in his heart and mind. It was Satoru's fault, was it not? He should have done better. He should have noticed. How could he not have? wasn't he the strongest? Wasn't that his job? How could he be so bad at everything?

How could he fail everyone like this?

“Gojo-San?”

Your feminine voice cut his train of thought. He almost forgot the situation he is now stuck in. He's been doing that a lot: losing himself in thought, mind almost immune to the outer world until he temporarily lost his sense of self. Nothing felt quite the same any more. It was like the world had lost its color.

“Sorry- What's up?” He turned to you. Gojo-san, you called him. When did you stop using his given name? What's with the '-san'? Gojo hadn't realized that losing one person was the first step, and now he found himself deep in the road of losing everyone.

And now he's stuck in the elevator with the girl he had liked for so long. He couldn't find it in himself to say anything to you, to push your buttons like he always did or joke around. When did the world become so heavy? He does not know.

“Are you okay? You seemed off.”

Your face is devoid of any genuine emotion, seemingly expressionless. But your voice is laced with concern. Gojo could only guess you didn't want him thinking you pity him or anything of such. But if that isn't the case, he wouldn't know. He's too tired to bother thinking about it.

“Yeah, yeah. I'm fine,” he smiled in assurance, “Just bothered by, well, this-” he threw his hand in the way of the control panel. The elevator doors have been stuck for almost twenty minutes now. How pleasant.

“uh huh,” you sigh, turning back around. How did you turn so cold?

When the silence stretches, you start a conversation, hesitant at first. “By the way, I got accepted as a helper in a nursery in Kyoto,” you mutter, gaze avoiding his own. “they're expecting me to start work right after spring break.”

Spring break?

Holy shit. It hit him like a truck. That’s barely a week and a half from now.

“Spring break? Why so soon?”

“That’s when the students file back in,” you mumble, fiddling with the watch placed around your wrist. You pause to read the time, then turn to meet his eyes. “I’m leaving in four days to get settled.”

“Oh…” His breath caught, “Train?”

What a stupid question. He knows. Satoru has never been unintelligent, especially in conversing. But now his unintelligence shines through as if it’s his only trait. He’s glad you don’t question it.

“Yeah, I have no other form of transport really.”

“Well, uh…” He hates himself. He hates himself for not doing anything. He hates himself for being so weak and  cowardly, for being unable to keep his friends around him, for shutting everyone he holds close out. But now, he especially hates himself for being unable to feel happy for you, or to congratulate you on the opportunity, “come visit us every once in a while, yeah?”

Your mouth remains shut, only staring at the tall man before your eyes. The silence stretches between the two of you once again, and you don’t find it in you to speak of how you feel.

“You.. you know you could have died, right? We all could have b-but you…” You trail off, thoughts splattered like a spilled pot of ink. Although you seemed unfazed, in your mind you were anything but. Haibara, Riko, and all the losses that trailed and every event that followed has been stressful and nerve-wrecking. And even in the quietness and silence of the general atmosphere, it has been nearly impossible to find peace within yourself.

“Well, I didn’t. What happened had passed. Can you change that? I doubt so. No point in ‘if’ and ‘could’ve’.”

Before you could respond,the lights flickered back on. You grow unsure if you’ve struck a nerve, but that wasn’t what you meant. Gojo’s response had nothing to do with what you said, you were sure he knew exactly what your words were meant for. Why is he so scared of confronting it?

You don’t know. You could never hope to know because you and Gojo Satoru live in different worlds, the man who was only Satoru some time ago. You were worlds apart, yet  Satoru loved to play pretend that he lived in the same world as you, even when he stuck out like a sore thumb. But he was no longer. Ever since Geto left… it’s safe to say everyone has been changing slowly, deforming from their previous lives and personalities. But Satoru flipped, like the head and tail of a coin, he got himself a new face. He turned into Gojo Satoru; the strongest. A soul unalive. A broken boy in an ever growing body. A stranger.

Two days later you find yourself still roaming the campus , searching so desperately for something. Anything. A reason to stay, perhaps? You don’t find it anyway. You have no attachment as this place holds nothing but misery. Or that’s what you told yourself over and over as you packed your things.

Your steps were graceful, walking so cautiously as if careful to not wake someone up. Your fingers find rest on the old, dusty door frame, pushing yourself into the room that hadn’t been used for a good month or so. The classroom looked the same as it always did. Except for the shadow that loomed over it; a gray shade that sent chills down your spine. Or maybe it’s just your imagination. 

Then you spot something rather out of place. You’re sure you’ve never seen it before and although you know it’s none of your business, the way it tugs at the strings of your curiosity is undeniable.

It’s red, poking out of what you’re sure is Gojo’s desk. The gloomy classroom was no fit for paper with a color so vibrant. 

Your heart skips a beat when you glimpse the seat next to Satoru’s. You do your best to avoid looking at Geto’s desk any further. You busy yourself with the task at hand, reaching out for the mysterious paper hidden in the wooden desk. Shivers run up your arm at the texture of the scrunched paper.

You attempt to straighten it to your best ability, strained by his hard work of crumbling it with obvious frustration. you can barely make out the letters of your name in the middle of the paper, outlined by a messy circle. How Gojo of him. A few lines stick out of the ‘circle’, one of them has the name of a steakhouse somewhere in Tokyo. Another has a date, reading somewhere along February. It’s near impossible to make out what the small combination of letters say, especially when Satoru’s handwriting is closer to symbols than a comprehensible language.

The thought of it was so funny it didn’t feel like him at all. Satoru never planned anything. Every breath he took was based on pure impulse. Never would it have occurred to you that he thinks through things, let alone brainstorm.

The thought makes you smile. But the realization that he never asked you out because he changed his mind or everything that happened getting in his way makes your stomach churn unpleasantly. 

You decide it’s probably for the best to never bring it up. It would only make matters worse for both of you. Life ran its course; who are you to try and change it?

“I apologize, but my answer remains. I refuse to take part in this,” you spoke in an even tone. “I have a job and a life away from jujutsu. I’ve made it clear sorcery is not a part of my life anymore.”

"That’s completely understandable,” the old man argued, his voice hoarse with age. You’re pretty sure you hear anger further straining his voice, “but your technique is quite strong. That strength could be of great assistance if put to use.”

“Thank you, sir,” you dip your head, maintaining eye contact with the decaying man. “But I truly apologize. The decision is final.”

“If you ever do change your mind, please let us know. We’d be more than happy to hear it.”

You almost let a sigh of relief escape. Finally he gave up. You end up only nodding your head in response gratefully, retreating from the old man. As soon as you're safe and out of sight, you let your posture drop, eyes rolling back in annoyance. These guys are truly as relentless as ever.

You stopped upon a familiar scent catching in your nostrils. Lifting your head up, your eyes roam around, scanning the room for your friend.

“You look troubled,” Shoko approaches you, taking the cigarette out from between her teeth. “What’s with the face?”

“How is that man even alive,” you look at her, “he’s ancient.”

Your comment earns a light chuckle from the brunette. “I’m glad I never have to get caught up in this bullshit.”

“Blissed aren’t you,” you roll your eyes as you speak. “I shouldn’t have come in the first place, I knew they were going to do this.”

“It’s alright, you’re all done now. Here-” Your friend then lifts the cigarette up, putting it near your mouth. When you don’t show any resistance she, being the bad influence she has always been, proceeds to place it between your lips. You waste no time, making quick work of the drag you inhale, bringing the familiar cloud of toxic chemicals and tobacco into your lungs. Your expression relaxes, shifting into one of relief. Shoko scoffs playfully, muttering that you’re dramatic under her breath before she pulls her cigarette from you, taking in a drag.

“Satoru’s here, by the way,” Shoko didn’t need to look at you to guess the way your eyes snap towards her. She bites back a smile. “He’s calmed down. He’d even seem the same as long as you don’t squint too hard.”

“Good for him,” you mutter, trying to seem as unbothered and nonchalant as your accelerating heart rate would allow. You avoid looking at Shoko, trying to seem disinterested. You know she’d pretend you weren’t gawking at her the second she said his name.

“He’s trying, you know. He’s just as nervous as you are.”

“‘M not nervous,” you scoff, “For god’s sake. It’s been ten years already.”

Satoru is stressed. He's nervous, as Shoko put it. He’d spent so long trying to ignore the past, pretend the past wasn’t at all. He couldn’t confront it. He didn’t want to. Satoru knows what he’s done, he's aware that he hurt you the last time you two had interacted. And that was ten years ago. He even let you leave without so much as a goodbye. How could he look you in the eye and pretend nothing has ever happened?

Gojo didn’t want to face the consequences of what he’s done. More so what he hasn’t. So many things were left unsaid in the elevator that day. They’ve been hanging over Satoru ever since, weighing his heart down and wearing it out.

What if he’s met by another woman? Ten years change a lot as is. What if the eyes that meet his aren’t yours? What if he finds himself talking to a stranger that carries around your name and features? Of all the horrors Gojo Satoru had faced in his life, nothing caused dread to pool in the pit of his stomach like this thought does.

Shoko seems to find something beyond you interesting. You don’t bother to turn to see as the brunette has always been a little in her own head. She’s probably just dozed off.

“Hey, think you can hold this for me?” Shoko muttered once Gojo crossed her sight. She stands facing you, averting his gaze. “I’ll be right back, nature’s calling.”

From his distance, Gojo couldn’t make out what the two of you were saying. He watched as your shoulders shook, presumably in laughter. Shoko then made her away from you, barely sparing Satoru a glance.

Every step he took felt heavy, weights landing on his shoulders as he moved towards you. He watched smoke emerge from over your head. He didn’t know you smoked. And even though he’s not completely sure what you do for a living now, he’s not expecting any nursery to accept a smoker in their team.

His long strides finally arrived, opting to remain a step behind you. Close enough to make his presence known.

The aura was unmistakable, almost as if it could be physically sensed. You freeze in place, the cigarette remaining a few inches from your lips. Even after he changed his perfume to one a lot more manly and appealing, and clearly grew taller judging by the shadow he cast over you, his presence still had the same strength as it did before. If not stronger. Anyone else would say it’s intimidating. But you find surprising comfort in it.

“That’s going to kill you,” his hand  reached from over your head, making sure to not cause any unnecessary physical contact. His fingers slip the burning cigarette  from your grip. You find yourself unable to make a single move in response, only watching his actions unfold.

He took a step, moving closer, dimming the light from the roll by rubbing it against the metal bars, then throwing it off the balcony. “You’re too young to kill yourself like that.”

“That bitch Shoko set me up,” You hiss, regaining your composure. “Will you look who showed up. You’re killing the ecosystem by throwing waste like this, Gojo.”

Although you haven’t glanced his way yet, You were every bit sure his mouth was quirked in the same smug smirk he wore so much when you were younger. You could even hear it in his voice as he spoke, “You haven’t grown at all, have you?”

“Oh shut it,” you chuckle. “You’re still as immature as ever. How you could be a manchild at 27 is a wonder to me.”

27… It felt so weird to say it out loud. Weren’t you just 17 a few days ago?

“Oh, how you hurt me,” he says in exaggeration, his voice conveying anything but the hurt he claims to feel. “That isn’t very nice of you.”

“That’s rich coming from you,” You say. He laughs a little, you do too. But the silence that follows is not that of a joke. He knew what you’re referring to. Maybe he underestimated your last encounter’s effect on you.

The silence speaks for itself. It’s louder than any conversation you’ve had before. What now? What have we become? Is it of any use to try anymore? Neither of you had an answer to the question that began to surface with this interaction.

The questions remain hung in the air, dimming the atmosphere around you. Was this fate’s doing? Or his karma? Gojo has always been told he’s a god, but how could he be a higher form of life when he struggled so much to hold a conversation?

He’s about to speak again when you cut him off, muttering “here-” as you push your hand down the coat you wore. Your tongue pokes at the inside of your cheek as you search for the anonymous object.

You pull out a worn out paper, grown from what could have been a bright red to an orangish shade. His eyes study as you shove the paper in his  direction, eyes avoiding his gaze at all costs.

Seeing your bashful expression made him rather curious, the contents of the wrinkled paper piquing his interest. He hesitates before he pulls the paper from your hand, half-expecting you to bite him.

The letters were scribbles, almost like they’re straight out of some cult’s ritual,  that with the wrinkles of the worn out paper making reading it next to impossible. Still, he could make out just enough to realize what this paper is. His eyes widened behind the blindfold. It didn’t take much to remember this paper, trivial as it may be.

“You found this- how did you even…?” he trails off, confused.

“I guess I did,” You confirm. He’s unsure if you’re proud of yourself for your rather… interesting discovery. It’s bold of you to pull this out ten whole years later. But he can’t deny the relief he feels that at least this means you don’t completely hate him. For once, he’s truly at loss for words. 

But he wouldn’t let a perfect opportunity like this slide.

“Oh, so you’re in love with me? You’re so obsessed with me that you kept this for so many years, what a loyal fangirl.”

Before he knew it, a weight so crushing landed on his foot. He turned off his infinity around you as a sign of trust. But he soon came to regret his rather unsmart decision. Your foot stomped and crushed his toes. It makes him groan in pain, bending slightly forward.

“Tomorrow, at Narisawa in Minato city, 5:30. I’m leaving for Kyoto in 3 days. Don’t waste your chance again, Gojo Satoru. You’re not getting another one.”

“I take it you’ve been in love with me ever since?” He leans forward, elbows on the table. “Say, did you fascinate about me?”

“Hmm..” you hum softly at his childish question, “only a little.” You show no signs of interest in his tactics as you sipped the wine in your hand. Undeniably, Gojo is taken aback by your lack of reaction. He hasn’t known you to be so reserved and smart at keeping him on edge. He couldn’t help finding your new behavior enticing.

Is there anything else you’d like to have?” You nodded your head towards the plates sitting on the table, some empty and some half-full. “Or do you wanna do something else before I go back to the hotel?”

“Hmm? Maybe I could join you at the hotel, actually. Surely it’ll be a lot less lonely with me around?”

You’re tempted by his offer, feeling the heat pooling in your stomach. He looked strikingly handsome today. Maybe you were just really lonely and touch starved, or maybe it’s the way his lips quirk as he teases you that makes your brain a little hazy, inappropriate thoughts floating through it and send jolts to your core. Yet, you set your mind on refusing his advances. You haven’t had a decent conversation since high school, for god's sake.

He keeps his eyes set on you, shining before him. You looked glamorous. He’d lie if he said there wasn’t a certain allure to  your matured looks. The years that flew by changed a lot of things about you two, but his breath still catches in his throat when your eyes meet his dreamy blues. The feelings rush back, memories clouding his train of thought. 

He’s sure he’s going to pay. He didn’t mind it at all, what a small price for getting to spend an evening with you. But you surprise him when you bring up that you had already put your card down, courtesy of having been the one to ask him out. Or maybe this was your way of telling him that you are in pretty good condition, living perfectly well without needing sorcery.

“How’s working as a jujutsu teacher?” you quip, smiling softly. “Utahime says you’ve got some interesting kids in your pack? Two special grades, too. You’re sure a favorite attraction for wonders.”

“You’re still in contact with her too?” he dodges talking about his students, not meeting your gaze. “That’s ironic. Weren’t we friends too?”

A hoarse chuckle emerges from him. But nothing about it leads back to amusement, as it was a joyless sound devoid of life. Almost as if he were mocking you. The dark lenses of the shades sitting on the bridge of his nose served as a shield. He curses himself for being so weak. He's almost thirty but somehow you’ve got him acting like he did when he was 17. 

“You didn’t try to contact me either,” you shrug, not willing to take the blame for your lack of contact. 

“You could have visited then. Even Yaga talked about you every once in a while,” he isn’t too happy and it’s showing.

“All good things, I hope-“

“Don’t change the subject,” he frowns, an uneasy edge outlining his words. “He was enough. You didn’t have to go ahead and leave too.”

“I had to move on, Gojo,” the name felt like a jab every time you used it. He couldn’t bring himself to say anything about it. This is how you drew your boundaries. Calling them by their last names gives you a false sense of satisfaction, convincing yourself that your sorcerer friends are past figures now. Mere acquaintances. 

“-I couldn’t remain hung there forever, I valued my mental health. You grew distant, the atmosphere was growing uneasy every day. I had to cut ties with Jujutsu before I couldn’t recognize myself anymore.”

“Yet you’re here now. Back to square one,” his playful tone was long gone, now replaced by an even, stern one. “Whether you moved away or called us by our last names. It’s a curse you can’t escape. you’ll always end up back in the palms or jujutsu.”

His words held some truth. You know that. But just as he refused to confront this past, you repulsed the idea of your reality. You truly want to believe that you could escape this part of yourself and live a normal life. You couldn’t come to terms with your inability. You held onto your hopes as if your sanity completely depended on it. Another thing that won’t change no matter how much you grew.

“I'll be okay as long as I refuse to interact with this world.”

Once you leave the restaurant, you find yourself wandering through the rich streets of Minato city. It felt as though the night was pulling you further into its welcoming embrace, with nothing rushing you.

“He was only thirteen,” you chuckle, arm linked in his. “It’s unbelievable how bold kids nowadays are.”

“I would’ve done the same thing, honestly,” he smirks, his gaze fixed on the stores around.

“Of course. You’ve got the brains of a thirteen year old.”

Satoru grins at your remark, pulling you into a clothes store. 

“What’s this?” you look around in confusion, noting a woman in a suit welcoming you. The place looked a little too fancy, judging by the display of the items and the lighting of the place.

“It’s a western brand,” Satoru answers. Looking over at him, you can’t help but smile a little. He looks good tonight. His fancy outfit gave the impression that he’s a model to strangers. “Louis Vuitton, I think,” He furrows his brows, trying to remember the name of the brand stores he’s been to with Nobara and Shoko.

“Prada, sir,” The lady in a suit corrected him. “Can I help you?”

“We’re just browsing, thank you.” It’s a phrase he heard from Kugisaki countless times whenever they wandered into a store. His response makes you chuckle, watching as the lady takes a few steps backwards politely.

You’re soon comfortable, searching through the expensive coats and bags. Satoru watched tenderly. Even though the ten years that passed with no contact whatsoever definitely propose a wall between you, he's glad you're able to feel free. You might nit on the same page, but you two can work with what you have.

You stride back to the “S” shaped velvet couch sat in the middle of the checker-carpet store, where Satoru sat. But he was nowhere to be seen.

You walk around in hesitance and confusion, completely aware of the lady walking always a few feet behind you. Surveillance, you guess.

You find him standing in front of the white counter, taking a black bag with the brand’s name printed onto it in golden letters from the man standing behind the counter in a white shirt with the brand's logo on it.

“Gojo,” you call him, confusion fused into your expression.

He extends his arm to you, trying to suppress any sourness at you calling him Gojo. “Let’s go?”

You nod, eyeing him suspiciously before you link your arm in his. You make sure to flash a grateful smile at the woman by the door as you walk past the reflective glass door.

You almost forgot how busy the world outside is. It felt as though the glass building of the store was sound proof. Now you have to adjust to the noise of the full streets again.

Satoru remains silent for the most part. It’s not awkward, rather just neither of you knew what to say. He expected you to ask about what he bought, which you have considered. You decide against it though as you feel it’s none of your business. You’re not too surprised anyway as Gojo has always been a wealthy man. He could buy the entire Prada chain with half of his monthly spending.

“What do you wanna do now?” He asks. “Wanna go somewhere else?”

You think about going to the club to give the night the best closure. But neither of you were dressed for it anyway. You contemplate your choices. Then you grin at him, and Satoru knows it’s best to fear what comes after

You’re well aware that he has a high alcohol tolerance. While you would be wasted a few shots in. Yet you consumed so many drinks recklessly, thinking that maybe you could beat him in a drinking game.

That’s why he’s stuck to your side now, helping your sleeping body out of his car. Satoru is glad your hotel card was so easy to find in your purse, taking it out as he gets into the lobby.

A few people eye the man, glaring at him and at the way he held you in his arms. But he couldn’t bring himself to think too much about it. His mission is to get you to bed now.

“Satoruuu~” You whine, rubbing your face into the pillow once he sat you on the white bedding. “Stay with meeee”

And Satoru is nothing if not human. Despite what everyone else says. It’s proven now that he had come to face a human flaw like this. He is weak, and you are all but practically seducing him.

“Stop crying,” He mutters. He finds himself smiling sheepishly at the unlikely scenario he found himself in. Tucking you in bed, your face hot due to the drinks you had. He really should have stopped you. “I’ll stay the night, so sleep already.”

He convinced himself it’s for the best. He should watch over you for tonight. No funny business. Deep inside he knew he was just finding a reason— any reason to stay around you for a little longer, heart yearning for the lost years. But he ignored the pathetic feeling, convincing himself it’s for your sake instead.

“But I’m uncomfortableee,” you whine again, hands running down your body. “The dress...”

Did you have to make it so hard on him? Satoru is tempted to kiss you, eyebrows knitted in the space between, eyes looking around the room for any sort of aid.

This is probably a form of invading your privacy, but he sees no other choice. He’ll have to hold it together for tonight.

“nngh..”

Your groan came with an impending headache. Your body moves against the rich covers of the bed, sunlight illuminating your physique.

He stopped in his tracks, feet bare against the gray carpet.

Your form is beautiful, one to compete with statues of goddesses. The rays of light complimented every inch of skin in all the right ways. Satoru had to physically shake his head to stop the flowing perverted thoughts in his head.

Your flinch when you catch him standing near the door, heart beating slightly faster. You thought that you’re alone. You don’t think much of it anyway, muttering a “holy shit” under your breath.

“Good morning,” he casually greets, brushing off the mutual shock, albeit for different reasons. “I made coffee, if you wanted some.”

“Oh... thank you,” you mutter, rubbing your eyes as you sit up straight. “Did you eat anything yet?”

“Not yet, no,”  he says, holding his overly sweet coffee in both palms. “Thought I’d wait until you woke up.”

“You’re a real sweetheart, Satoru,” you yawn. His name slipped past your lips before you could stop it. You busy yourself with stretching your arms. “What a doting housewife God has blessed me with”

His response is only a chuckle, rolling his eyes as he sighs on the edge of the bed. “Well, at least I wasn’t begging a man to spend the night with me”

“Huh?”

You couldn’t remember anything of the prior night. Nothing that occurred after you sat at the bar, specifically. But then you begin to realize, eyes widening at the revelation. You feel dreadfulness landing in the pit of your stomach a little too late. 

He’s shirtless, wearing only his suit pants. And even though you wouldn’t mind the sight any other day, the fact that you are in your pajamas isn’t helping at all.

“Did we...” You trail off, expression darkening. Your eyes meet his own, fear implanted in your pupils. You watch as his expression drifts from confusion to an awkward hesitance. Unsure how to break the news to you.

You don’t know what to expect, not realizing you’re holding your breath. 

“I-I’m sorry,” He sighs, gaze faltering as his eyes look away from you. Your eyes widen further, oxygen becoming hard to consume.

What have you done?

“But- don’t worry. You know I’m not some asshole...” if anything, he sounded chivalrous. “I-I’ll be accountable for my mistake. When do you want to hold the wedding?”

You gasp, face feeling hot. “You piece of shit-“ You groan as your foot reaches him, forcefully pushing him off the bed. “As if!”

He breaks into a fit of laughter, the sound full of genuine delight. “I can’t believe you fell for it,” He manages between the laughter.

“Fuck you, Satoru,” you mutter, a smile of relief breaking across your face. “I can’t believe you pulled something so childish.”

“Why are you so down?” He climbed back onto the bed, reclaiming his spot on the edge. “Are you disappointed? You know it’s never too late to just as-“

“Fuck off,” Your heart is pounding as you send him another kick, less forceful this time. “Say one more word about it and I’ll make sure you don’t make it out of this room in one piece.”

He laughs, asking you to pass his coffee. You reach for his coffee from the bedside table. Your fingers lift the glass mug to your lips, sipping at the hot beverage before handing it to him.

Your face scrunches up at the horrible taste. Too much sugar. Too much milk. It’s a lot worse than you might think.

“Your coffee should be criminal,” you push the mug his way, frowning. Satoru hums in response. 

There’s no awkwardness between the two of you, and he can’t help but cherish it. He feels content, enough to sit a little closer, at least.

Enough to lean in towards you, mouth closing over yours in an ever awaited kiss, at least.

[neuvistar]

ate marie (is it ok for me to call you that) ano po yung thoughts mo sa mga genshin dads

- pinoy anon

❝ GENSHIN PAPAS ?! ❞ childe, thoma, neuvi, wrio, itto n kaveh x fem!reader cw. some mentions of pregnancy | small a/n. hello again pinoy anon :3 ++ ofc! u can call me that, always ❕GENSHIN PAPAS… sige wait lang.. i think the best dads would probably be!!!!! (list natin yng mga dilfs guys)

𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐃𝐄

AH YES OF COURSE. THE NUMBER ONE FAMILY GUY. childe being on this list is not surprising considering the fact he’s (canonically?) a family man, he loves his siblings n u can’t tell me he wants his own children too :(( he probably has 3-4, a big family just like his own! he really does try his best to balance his occupation and his job as a husband and father, he knows what he does isn’t really what parents would do but he’s a good dad regardless :(( he makes sure his work doesn’t get in the way of his love for his young ones

𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐀

i think thoma would be one of the best fathers, i mean.. HAVE YOU SEEN HIM. he’s so sweet guys 😭☝️ i think he’s a stay at home dad, cooking delicious meals for his exhausted wife and cute little babies <3 thoma is most definitely a family typa guy… i’m calling it rn he has abt 3-4 kids (waw) :3 the first time u had given birth 2 ur first child his heart immediately melted into hot chocolate, he was SOOOO happy and so damn emotional :((( he’s such a good papa n u know that all too well, you married such a good man :,)

𝐍𝐄𝐔𝐕𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄

neuvillette again with either 4-5 little dragons who look just like him 😋 i feel like neuvillette would be a heavily sweet father who’s also strict in his own ways, all he wants is to keep his little ones safe so you can’t blame him for being so (kinda) snappy whenever they run off somewhere :(( he loves his little ones too much he doesn’t want ANYTHING bad 2 happen to them. neuvillette already treats the melusines like his own children, so it’s no doubt he gives his dragonlings the same behaviour <3 he’s such a good dad

𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐒𝐋𝐄𝐘

his entire backstory just SCREAMS “best papa” and u can’t tell me otherwise. wriothesley is somewhat unexpected but i believe he wants kids of his own, maybe 2! due to how gentle and sweet he was to the little girl in his trailer AAANNND where he protected the other children in his backstory :(( wriothesley would be such a good daddy and i know that for sure, he has a soft spot for them and definitely devotes his life 2 protecting them and YOU :(( making sure they got the childhood he never had

𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐈 𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐎

something about this big guy just makes me go “oh yeah. he’s definitely the typa guy to have kids.” ITTO… he’s just a fun dad :(( i can imagine his little ones inheriting his oni features.. his horns, etc! they look exactly like itto atp your genes didn’t even try 2 fight LMAO but anyways, itto is such a fantastic father! not as strict as others but he’s definitely fun and lets his young ones be carefree! i know for a fact one of his oni kids r an exact a copy of him :3

𝐊𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐇

like i’ve been saying for the past few weeks now, KAVEH IS SO (GIRL) DAD CODED. this man jus screams girl dad or jus dad in general n i believe in that statement FULLY. kaveh’s a busy father who tries his best to tend to your needs n his little ones! (hint, they’re all girls) his daughters look EXACTLY like him and it’s acc insane :,3 kaveh just sparks me as a typa guy who’d be a dad, he jus gives off major dad energy! since he’s sassy, i bet his daughters would be sassy too n sass him daily :3

[waiitwotworkshop]

*ahem* gaang headcanons? very specifically, transfem zuko headcanons?

YAYY

Zuko goes by Lin and everyone thinks that’s her new name so they try not to deadname her, so when anyone refers to her as zuko they all cringe and try to defend her. Only for her to be like ‘idk why you guys kept calling me Lin, we’re not in public”

Zuko is sm more sensitive abt her hair. She is crying inside when she cuts it off at the end of s1 when it starts growing back in she’s so happy. It grows back a little wavy and it’s such a cute cut that makes her look feminine even w short hair.

Somehow attracts guys while working at the tea shop. This includes jet (ugh) but ultimately they don’t go further than some weird flirting which is actually just insulting each other. Jin still has a crush on her but she doesn’t go on a date with her because iroh just assumes she’s straight(it’s debatable)

Sokka rlly likes girls who can beat him up so naturally he gets a crush. This hot girl is mean to him but sometimes laughs at his jokes he’s absolutely falling for her. And he loves to treat her delicately even though she can clearly handle herself. This is where we get into some divergence from canon (other than the obvious lmao) canon zuko would not want someone to treat him so fragile but Sokka does it so lovingly that she can’t help but love it. Like ‘omg a puddle let me carry you over it so you don’t get mud on your shoes :3’ just being such a gentleman and zuko is so in love with it because she’s never been treated so gently. Ugh just imagine him being so lovesick over zuko, like ‘yes darling, anything u say darling ^^’ this is basically canon do u see the way he treats suki lol. I just love the thought of this grumpy loser doing a complete switch when it comes to zuko.

She wouldn’t go back to the firenation with Azula because she /can’t/ her father would definitely not accept her like this so this is a hypothetical but she would hate being expected to be Mai’s bf again. And she tries to give her a seashell bc she thinks it’s nice and /she’s/ a girl and likes it so why the hell doesn’t Mai like it too. She’s definitely jealous of the girls getting attention so her and azula r just pissed together.

Zuko is 10x more nervous around katara bc she desperately wants them to be friends. She just thinks back to how Azula made friends so easily and how zuko was so bad at it/didn’t want to hang out with guys that she just tagged along like a loser. She’s so desperate to finally make her own friend that she also tags along to wherever katara is and cringes at herself every time they interact. When suki joins the gaang and three of them hang out she’s secretly ecstatic.

I will literally go on abt trans girl zuko forever I’m so happy to have an excuse to talk abt her someone please ask me more

[bigskydreaming]

My TW fandom experience:

*Everyone watches the exact same episode where Scott McCall says what if we dont kill people tho and after much deliberation, its agreed lets not kill people this episode and this is the only reason most former villains and fan favorites stick around and become the pack's new besties instead of being written out of the show due to the pack's initially proposed solution of Ready Set Murder*

Most of fandom: Well that was terrible. He's literally the worst. They should've just killed the villains, problem solved, why is he so dumb. Inquiring minds want to know.

Also most of fandom:

*writes fics where nobody cares what Scott says or thinks because they all agree, he's literally the worst, so dumb, why is he even here*

*fics remain mysteriously populated by all the characters everyone says the mains should absolutely have murdered to fix all their problems and the only reason they didnt in canon is Scott insidiously mind-controlled his friends into non-homicidal compliance*

Scott fans: .....hang on. I'm confused.

Most of fandom: What's confusing dumbass, literally why would they kill the villains that are hot and white and shippable instead of just making friends with them so that sometimes they can get married and have kids? Its called letting people change and grow, even mass murderers deserve redemption arcs. Also I dont know if you know this but murder is bad, plz read more books. LOL why are Scott fans like this.

Scott fans: Wait. But didn't all the characters want to murder that villain you made the central character and one half of the hero pair of 70% of the fics written last season? So who said what if we dont kill people tho and got everyone to change their votes from Ready Set Murder to Redemption Arc Marriage and then maybe babies?

Most of fandom: Umm, Stiles? Obviously. LMAO. Do you even watch the show?

Scott fans: Okay, but Stiles was the one who pitched Ready Set Murder. It was his plan. So who was like what if we dont kill people to Stiles, so that then he said wait guys lets not kill people?

Most of fandom: Oh that was Peter. They have a special bond. He gets him.

Scott fans: Right. So did Peter sell Stiles on the whole lets not kill people thing before he killed his niece and then like ten other people? Or was it after that.

Most of fandom: Before. No! Wait. After! Yeah, it was after that.

Scott fans: Got it. So who said what if we dont kill people to Peter to get him to agree lets not kill people which he definitely did since he definitely did not continue to kill people all the way to the end of the show?

Most of fandom: .....Deucali....

Scott fans: *squint one eye*

Most of fandom: .....heo....?

Scott fans: *squint both eyes*

Most of fandom: Derek! Right, yeah. Derek, it was definitely Derek.

Scott fans: Oh okay. Derek said lets not kill people to Peter. I'm assuming after he killed Peter, since I mean, it wouldn't make much sense for him to be all hey what if we dont kill people to Peter and then literally kill Peter haha. We can at least agree on that much, right?

Most of fandom: I don't know that we can, actually.

Scott fans: Well, let's just say that it was after he killed Peter and thus after Peter came back. Which does make sense, I guess, I mean, at least that was also after he gave his pack the Go Kill Lydia assignment for their werewolf homework....

Most of fandom: Whoa, whoa, hold up. That has nothing to do with any of this. It was a totally different situation because Derek didnt WANT to kill Lydia, he HAD to kill Lydia. She was turning into an evil murder lizard, what was he supposed to do?

Scott fans: She quite literally was not.

Most of fandom: Okay but see he THOUGHT she was, which is basically the same thing.

Scott fans: Is it tho?

Most of fandom: Yes. Look, he was like, 60% sure it was her and that's over half sure so that's a reasonable conclusion to make at that point. Anyone would have made that mistake.

Scott fans: Except for Scott. Because he's so much dumber than everyone else.

Most of fandom: Yes! Exactly.

Scott fans: So when Scott said what if we dont kill people to Derek, and stopped him and his pack from killing Lydia, because murder is bad and Derek even agrees, its not like he WANTED to kill Lydia, he just HAD to kill Lydia because she was probably an evil murder lizard and what else was he gonna do.....Scott only said and did that because he was too dumb to come to the conclusion everyone smarter than him would reasonably come to....which was that Lydia had to die, even though murder is bad and she was maybe potentially not even technically an evil murder lizard?

Most of fandom: Right. So it doesnt count.

Scott fans: But it was good that he stopped them from killing Lydia though, right? Cuz everyone likes Lydia, and also, she wasnt actually the evil murder lizard, that was Jackson, and also, they turned out to not actually need to kill Jackson to stop him from being the evil murder lizard?

Most of fandom: ....yes but no. Like yes to all of that, but he was still wrong, is the point. So no.

Scott fans: So -

Most of fandom: Look I dont think you're getting it?! OMG, okay. I don't know if I can dumb it down any further, but lemme give it one last shot. 1) Murder is bad. 2) Even hot white villains deserve redemption arcs. 3) And Scott is terrible. There. Its really that simple lol.

Scott fans: Okay. So everyone deserves redemption. Any character can be better if the other characters give them a chance. Even mass murderers.

Most of fandom: Right.

Scott fans: But Scott is irredeemable. There's nothing that can make him any better so other characters shouldn't even bother giving him a chance. Because he's terrible.

Most of fandom: Also correct.

Scott fans: Because he's always saying murder is bad and what if we dont kill people tho.

Most of fandom: YES. Finally. Now you're getting it. Honestly, what was so hard about that.

[dandylovesturtles]

Fanfic Writer Ask Game!

🎯 🦈?

🎯 Do you have a writing milestone you’re working towards?

nope. I am at the whims of my inspiration and energy levels.

🦈 Which character is the toughest to write?

in ROTTMNT I would probably say Mikey. I think it's a little easy to lean too hard into the sort of "sweet little brother" thing that a lot of fandom likes (this isn't meant as a callout, lol, I like it too) and forget that he is canonically a little gremlin who is very silly and sometimes pretty gross (I mean he's a 13 to 15-year-old boy so it tracks).

Also he probably has the least defined character arc of literally every main character in the series (including the supporting cast like April, Splinter, Draxum, and both Caseys). Leo has his struggles with his place and identity within the team as well as his growth as a leader, Donnie has his issues with feeling replaced and directly linking his family "needing" him to his family loving him, Raph is struggling to live up to the expectations of the clan and his role as a big brother, April deals with her struggles connecting with her own peers and her fear that she doesn't count as part of the fam, Splinter has a billion things going on, Draxum has a whole redemption arc (truncated as it was) and Casey Sr effectively does too, and Casey Jr. has grief and trauma. And Mikey... would probably have had a really good character arc if we'd gotten the rest of season 2 and season 3!

A lot of Mikey's episodes where he gets to really get feelsy and show his emotions are directly tied to other people's character development, especially Donnie's and Draxum's, so we don't get as much of what his deal is. The only really solid Mikey centric episode is Hot Soup The Game, which definitely brings up Mikey's frustrations with being the youngest and thus babied as a result, so that's something you can draw on for his character, but even that's more tied directly into what he wants from interactions with other people and less about what he wants for himself.

(the truffle episode is super weird... like Mikey learns not to take his friends for granted? I guess?? I wouldn't have expected him to in the first place but yeah I guess that's some character development lol)

(actually as a total side note, it does annoy me a little that when Todd is first introduced as a character in Season 1, the whole point of his superpower being niceness was that he was so nice you'd do anything for him, and even villains were unable to turn him down, which was a really good gag and made him an interesting character. Then at some point it became that Todd's niceness meant he couldn't turn anyone down and suddenly he was just kind of a doormat, to Mikey first in the truffle episode and then all of them later in Todd Scouts. I actually like the Todd Scouts episode but also you didn't have to do that to him lmao)

(actually actually even though I like Todd Scouts I would have loved a version of that episode where Splinter stayed with them in the woods and then we dealt with how his feelings were hurt by the kids being more interested in their phones than his teaching and they could have pointed out that their dad kind of waited until late in life to start teaching them life skills and IDK WE DIDN'T GET THE FAMILY BONDING CAMPING TRIP WHEN THEY GOT CAUGHT IN THE TURTLE TANK IN SEASON 1, WHY DIDN'T WE GET IT IN SEASON 2??)

cough. anyway.

yeah so I always feel bad that when I look at my AUs and stuff I always feel like I give Mikey the least. I'm so sorry, Mikey, you're just already perfect and I don't know where to take you. ;;

Thanks for the ask!

[hereforthefunnyguys]

Can you tell me what your favorite rare pair is as well as a few head canons for them? I'm starving for rare pair content of any kind.

On it boss

I did Irateshipping Fragileshipping and a pinch of Klepto/Boardshipping :>

Irateshipping (because its me):

-In a domestic situation they are that one couple that can never agree on what to have for a meal. Joey loves meat, Marik hates meat. Joey hates super spicy stuff, Marik likes it (the masochistic Yami Marik instinct pulled through lmao). Joey loves fatty foods like red meat and heavy cream, Marik can't stomach them due to being raised with a Delicate Constitution (tm). You could not pay Joey to eat most vegetables and Marik will literally just eat raw spinach out of the bag like some kind of gazelle creature. They literally can't even agree over how to make eggs. Horrible couple to ever visit for dinner btw

-That said I don't think Marik could survive in a domestic situation for very long because he'd go Insane. Like those exotic macaws people keep in cages meant for like parakeets that start biting fingers off. Even with the power of Twue Wuv marik simply couldn't survive without a massive amount of stimulation which either means A) hes going to be starting another gang or B) he is going to be bothering joey 24/7

-They have a pitbull named Brutus :)

-Joey is constantly undergoing the Walter White "Noooo I refuse to take your Pity Money ill pay back all my debts on my own like a Real Man!" and marik is just paying everyone off behind the scenes to keep joey from getting kicked out of their apartment

-Marik cannot be casual about Joey in any situation he will rant about him for the rest of existence and all time to anyone who will listen or someone he has forced to listen and whether thats a good or bad rant depends on the state of their relationship at the time

Fragileshipping:

-Most sickly sweet couple you have ever met in all of your life in private. In public? You would be lucky to even know they're dating. They hold hands and thats like It

-Yugi kept on setting them up on dates meetings when Atem was still in the puzzle and it didn't work so great because Atem has negative rizz and sits on the couch like hes fucking paralyzed. Luckily Ryou can be easily entertained if you are willing to listen to him infodump about some shoestring-budget horror film thats been banned in Bolivia for grossly indecent content.

-Ryou is Atems beautiful darling boyfriend who is the light of his life and Atem is Ryou's pet little card game nerd

-Atem has an insane obligation to make sure Ryou is taken care of whenever anything bad happens to him ever because in the back of his mind hes always worried about him turning into modern-day TKB

Kleptoshipping/Boundshipping:

-Fundamentally the basis of this relationship should technically be Yugi engaging in his baser "I could fix him" instinct but also he does kind of think YB/TKB is really funny as just his usual evil bastard self. hes permanently trying not to go Wow he's kind of hot when he's evil while Bakura frantically details doomsday plan #23 to the gang

-Bakura looking at Yugi: this thing is so stupid and obsessed with friendship and its friends with the Pharoah (ew!) and its sickeningly adorable and yeah im in love with it now. fuck

-Everyone in the world must die EXCEPT for my darling boyfriend :)

-They can mutually devour a hamburger in a matter of seconds. Absolute meat destroyers (NOT double entendre (they have put multiple shops out of business via resource consumption esp because TKB will often dine and ditch especially at chains))

-Bakura is eternally frustrated because Yugi keeps on ruining his plans for world domination but hes so cute while doing it :(

-Yugi has the same fundamental beliefs as TKB but is a lot quieter about it which both makes TKB really mad and on the other hand it is very very satisfying to hear someone say "no no i get where you're coming from" after 3000 years of eternal torment

-They are Thee scary cool goth couple

-Bakura owns snakes and they like to nest in Yugi's hair because he generates Warmth. They are currently competing with their owner for who gets maximum yugi time and unfortunately bakura is kind of losing

[castlebyersafterdark]

do you think pillow princess will headcanon is formed a little from the bleed of noah's real life being quite luxurious and comfy? the boy likes indulgence etc. or perhaps its an off-shoot off will being the sub / bottom in many byler headcanons? because i dont even see crumbs for pillow princess will in the show... in the first episode he absolutely destroyed dustin in that bike race, plus he worked hard to survive the upside down alone and whipped out a gun so hardly a maiden in need of defending. they even said he often arrives to school early to work hard for tests in s1! he's considered a good student, a hard worker by mr clarke.

or does this headcanon only apply to moments of non-danger, like everyday life? the main evidence ppl often use for pillow princess will is the s3 moment where he's standing next to el not helping with the car, but he actually does help flip it with everyone using those pole things?? that moment was probably just a super stylised s3 shot to associate el with will and twin them up in the audience's brains. the other moment is will using a hoe instead of a shovel in s4 lmao. i love that bit so i have no evidence against this headcanon there... although rather than him being lazy it always strikes me as a way of showing his character's endless misfortune and pathos: the boy cannot catch a break, he even has to shovel dirt with a fricken hoe, yk??

i enjoy the headcanon so this is all in good fun, but as always, i do wonder where people pull these ideas out of haha

Hmmm, it might. Playing with the love of luxury and comfort. I don't completely and strictly use that terminology for him, but I do kinda like on occasion leaning into him indulging in those tendencies from time to time. And there's nothing wrong with it, totally valid! *coughcoughbelievemecough* I don't think it has anything to do with implying that he's incapable of being strong or independent. But I think there is a hesitance to lean into what may be his softer canon attributes and the over-correction beyond 'stereotypes.' Not everything has to be called out as a stereotype. Some things just are. Stereotypes aren't always negative.

I think some of what you listed as anti-evidence are used as bits to lean into the pillow princess attitude. I do see him as someone who if he has his choice? No, he's not into manual labor. Shoveling dirt, doing the heavy lifting with the car, Jonathan saying "you were so bad using the hammer" while building Castle Byers, all his little eye rolls and sighs and his tendency to lounge around, how over it he looks sometimes when things are physically demanding - all could literally mean nothing, but in fandom I think sometimes there's a tendency to maybe exaggerate traits to fit whatever other trait you'd like to add. So, we're not really going to find out what he's like in the bedroom. But it's a cute and fun and hot thought to play with the idea that Will would be someone who just really enjoys being pampered and have someone else take charge and lead and do a lot of the work sometimes. Nothing wrong with that. So yeah, it's more of the non-danger moments you mentioned.

And I also don't think calling him a pillow princess means he's an inactive participant in sex, either. It's just an occasional dynamic. Just like, if you so want to for this ship - exploring a dom/sub thing in the bedroom. It's just another activity. Not strictly always. Yes, do some people almost all of the time portray a specific dynamic in the bedroom? Absolutely. Like some people only like giving pleasure, never receiving it. But I think Byler is very exploratory, they're experimental, they do it all.

So Will's not like that all the time? But yeah, in my mind there are absolutely nights where Will is in need of Mike completely pampering his boy, Will doesn't have do anything but lie there and take it, be totally worshiped and railed and maybe it's a little submissive, but maybe he's just giving himself over to total indulgence. Mental as well as physical. And it could bleed over into non-sexual situations, too. Getting really doted on, doesn't have to lift a finger around the house, letting himself be lazy. Sometimes that's what the situation calls for. Will's sweet and sensitive and he's been through so much, and I think it's easy to see his role as explored in fandom to be one where regardless of what's going on, he's very well loved and taken care of.

[sapphire-weapon]

The thing about Resident Evil, though, is that “from the beginning” can mean one of two different things. You can start from the beginning with Resident Evil (1996) on PSX, I suppose, but Resident Evil 0 (2002) is chronologically the earliest point in the series.

And, in my opinion, starting with either of those games is a bad idea if you’re coming in from RE4.

I’m going to give you two viable paths through RE, and you can choose the one that you think would work better for you personally.

If you came into Resident Evil through RE4make (and/or OG RE4), and you are only interested in seeing Leon’s story before going into the wider canon, this is the path you take:

Resident Evil 2 & Resident Evil 2 Remake (it doesn’t matter which one you do first, but you should do both. RE2make cuts some shit that’s actually really super important.)

Google search “Resident Evil 3 Leon epilogue.” It’s a single image. Just read it.

Darkside Chronicles (game)

Congrats, you are now up to date with everything (important) that happened to Leon pre-RE4, and you now have a better context for who he is/what he does in that game. From there, the canon timeline for Leon’s appearances then goes:

Degeneration (movie)

Infinite Darkness (Netflix series)

Damnation (movie)

Resident Evil 6 (game)

Vendetta (movie)

Death Island (movie) (releasing in July)

And that’s it. You’re up to date with Leon’s story, and now you can go through the rest of the games at your leisure. The good news is that Leon is in every single canon CGI movie that’s been released, so you don’t have to worry about tracking down anything other than games in order to go into the wider canon once you’ve reached this point.

If you came into Resident Evil through RE4make (and/or OG RE4), and you want to go through the canon because you’re interested in the world and not necessarily hyperfixating on Leon, I actually suggest going backwards and out of order. These are the steps that I would take in order for the series to make the most sense as you’re going through it:

Resident Evil 2 & Resident Evil 2 Remake (again: do both). Doing this gives you more context for RE4, and it introduces you to Claire and makes you aware of who Chris is.

(optional) Resident Evil: Outbreak. Nothing that happens in this game matters, and you’ll never see any of these characters again. This is the only non-essential RE title that I’ll mention, and only because Kevin Ryman is delightful and was supposed to be the guy training Leon if Leon had ever actually started work for real.

Resident Evil Remake. Ignore RE1 on PSX. It’s been erased from canon and overwritten by REmake. This now gives you the setup for why Chris wasn’t in Raccoon City when Claire went looking for him, introduces you to him, and also the rest of the recurring main cast. It will also explain to you who Wesker is; he’s the guy who was talking to Ada in the post-credits scene in RE4make (and who called Leon a dog over and over lmao).

Resident Evil 0. This tells you how Rebecca got to where she was when you meet her in REmake and finishes fleshing out STARS and Wesker for you. By the time you’re done with RE0, you’ll have a full understanding of who the main players all are and how this all started.

Resident Evil 3. Original or Remake. Doesn’t matter, really. I recommend the remake just because Carlos is hot in that version and the game is overall more palatable, but the changes that happen between OG and remake don’t really matter in the way the changes between RE2/RE2make matter.

Code Veronica X. Now that everyone’s out of Raccoon City, the next event chronologically is Claire continuing her search for Chris (and finally finding him).

Umbrella Chronicles followed by Darkside Chronicles. This is just to cap off the Raccoon City saga. Most of what these two games are are recaps of all the games you just went through, but there are extra bits in there that are important. Like, the original version of Operation Javier is shown in Darkside Chronicles -- and, once you see it, you’ll understand why RE old guard says that it’s been changed and retconned in RE4make. The rest of this list is just how the series then unfolds chronologically, because we are now caught up to Resident Evil 4.

Degeneration (movie)

Infinite Darkness (Netflix series)

Revelations 1 (game)

Resident Evil 5 (game)

Damnation (movie)

Revelations 2 (game)

Resident Evil 6 (game)

Vendetta (movie)

Death Island (movie, but not out yet, so it’s okay if you go past it until it releases lmao)

Resident Evil 7 (game)

Resident Evil 8/Village (game)

And that’s it. That is the list of essential RE canon. Everything else in this series is just a spinoff that’s there for funsies, and some of it explicitly is not canon. If you want to be a complete and utter crazy person and go through it all, feel free, but I promise you that you don’t need to know who Morpheus D. Duvall is (nor do you want to), or about that dude who fucked that spider in Gun Survivor 2 (though it is the funniest bit of RE lore to pull out and shock people with. DUDE PUT HIS DICK IN A SPIDER).

Good luck and god bless.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Haii (⁠✯⁠ᴗ⁠✯⁠)

I'm just curious on where the big schlong John thing ever started from lmao. Have a nice day (⁠~⁠‾⁠▿⁠‾⁠)⁠~♡

Hey Nonny!!

ACTUALLY, it was sort of joked about pre-S3 because of the way Martin carries John's character, but it's the show itself that actually confirmed it, in HLV:

SHERLOCK: Not bad. BILL (still looking at John): An’ I further deduce ... (Sherlock raises his eyebrows, and he and John exchange a brief glance.) BILL: ... you’ve only started recently, because you’ve got a bit of chafing. (John looks down his body.) SHERLOCK: No – he’s always walked like that. Remind me – what’s your name again?

[...]

JOHN: Er, I ... right. I should probably tell you ... (The man reaches into John’s jacket pocket and takes out Bill’s flick-knife.) JOHN: Okay, I ... (he points to the knife) ... That. (The man pulls John’s jacket open.) JOHN: And ... (The man stands up, holding the tyre lever he has just taken from John’s jeans and looking at him sternly. Sherlock looks startled. John steps closer to the man and speaks confidentially.) JOHN: Doesn’t mean I’m not pleased to see you. (The man does not look amused.) [x]

If you don't understand the context... basically John is SO used to having something large between his legs that him walking around and kicking ass for the first 20 minutes with a HUGE assed tire iron down his pants is NOTHING to this man. It's subtly implying he's used to carrying around a large and heavy package up front.

And how do we know that it’s not implying that John’s junk is small enough to fit a tire iron in his pants? Because of the “set-up and payoff” nature of these two lines within minutes of each other in the episode. There’s a reason I included the first chunk: Sherlock establishes to the audience that John ALWAYS walks “like that”, BEFORE we – and he – find out about the tire iron he’s been carrying around. This sets the precedent that John ALWAYS walks “like he’s chafing” but Sherlock deduces it’s because he has a giant dong.

This is immediately paid off with the big reveal that John has not only been carrying around his junk, but also a huge-assed tire iron too WHILE being a BAMF, and in turn surprising Sherlock because, “holy hell, wow that’s hot”. Sherlock was turned on, I like to think, LOL.

You can read more posts on my John’s Giant Junk (Masterpost) which has many fine voices in the fandom going into SERIOUS analysis about... John. Yes.

So, the TL;DR of it is that it's canon John has a giant dong, and Sherlock misjudged just how big it was and was shocked.

Take from that what you want, and enjoy, Nonny! <3

[beanghostprincess]

What do you think about ZoSan. I love them but I don´t ship them. (hidding from the many ZoSan fans)

okay so my opinion here might be a bit controversial but i'm so cray cray i'm so brave i'm such a warrior in this fandom i'm just gonna say it:

i don't really like the zosan...

(btw i don't wanna spread hate but i'm too lazy to censor the ship name and tbh idk if it also shows up in the fyp if it's said in the ask??? i talk a bit negatively about it, so don't read it if you ship them in case it might bother you <3)

i love their dynamic and i've been saying they need to fuck since, like, the moment they started fighting on screen. the sexual tension is immaculate, please, just fuck already god- half of their problems would be solved asap if zoro pinned sanji against a wall already and fucked him so hard he spoke french.

i like the fact that although they're always arguing, they understand and trust each other when it comes to serious stuff. like yeah, we fight but we are not letting this affect the crew as a whole. they're just two very proud bastards who hate admitting they don't actually dislike each other that much. their whole dynamic is great in canon!!!! love to see them. i enjoy them a lot. they need to fuck already (saying this tho does not mean i ship them to an extreme extent. i just know gays when i see them).

however!!! i think my dislike towards the ship comes mainly from the fandom. because personally i enjoy them in canon and i like the content some people make of them (god knows i reblog zosan more than it looks like), but... the 90% of the content and shippers just make them so out of character they stress me tf out. i see a zosan shipper and i never know if they're the good kind or not and i start shaking with fear. and i'm a person that believes in "ship whatever tf you want bc everyone has different tastes and i'm not that crazy to fight over fictional characters and what other people like", but, y'know, bad experiences from my past idk.

they're not even in my top 10 op ships, but they exist. they're there. they're fun. they're cool, i guess. i feel very indifferent about them and if i see a cute/hot zosan thing i'll reblog it. but i don't seek content of them, y'know (unless i'm in a very sanji nsfw mood and the horniness takes over my original preferences. sometimes i just want sanji to be topped, i apologize).

but yeah, i'm very "meh" about them and the thing that makes me not really like them is the fandom, mostly. because there are some zosan shippers out there that just....................... they remind me of kiribaku shippers saying their ship is queerbait when it's very obviously NOT queerbait and claiming them to be canon when they're obviously not canon and etcetcetc. that, and the fact that a lot of people write/draw them extremely out of character. personally, for me soft zosan (i love soft zosan bc i'm a softie) could only work after a long-ass development and they'd still act like the idiots they are. that being said, nsfw zosan works every time in every universe bc, again, the sexual tension is tangible, man. and somehow people manage to do it out of character????? lmao.

people are SO obsessed with this ship bc it's easy to sexualize and easy to write because "haha boys fucking haha fighting haha" which is uhhhhhh not my thing, really. like i do love nsfw zosan but it also has to be written extremely in character and- idk i think that it's just on me.

basically, i'm indifferent about them and when i see people so so so hyped i just don't really get it. and then there's people that actively believe that they're queerbaiting and that instantly makes me angry, which translates into not liking the ship for a while. and when i go back to being indifferent and liking some stuff of them, i just don't really care much? and then i see someone writing them ooc and i dislike them again and- that over and over and over again.

and okay this whole thing seems stupid but i've had past experiences in fandoms and tbh saying that you don't like THE popular ship is like yelling at the shippers to attack you.

but, yeah, to summarize: i'm indifferent about them. i like them in very specific situations and content. most of the shippers and ooc content make me mad (which is like, most of them). but!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the thing is: when zosan is done well, zosan is great. but when it's done out of character??? i can't fucking stand it.

i'm kind of contradicting what i said about not liking them because i do like them?? i just don't like them THAT much or to that extent and it has to be a very specific flavor?? and the shippers and content make me so mad sometimes i just stop reading fics or looking for content idk. i guess what i'm trying to say is that:

-> canon zosan cool

-> fanon zosan makes me dislike them

-> i don't really care and since this fandom is literally FULL of that ship i just have to live with it idk they're fine ig

[fish-bowl-2]

okay lmao you don't have to answer them all but im interested in your hot takes when you have time

7, 8, 9, 13, 16, 19, 21, 22, 24

😁 we need something to talk about in this micro fandom

Oh boy oh boy...

7. What character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because of how the fandom acts about them? Honestly, a bit of a hard one for me to answer because I don't really have one. I mean, there are always going to be fandom interpretations I am not into, but even so I don't really let that influence how I feel about the actual characters. A lot of those fandom interpretations don't seem to be the overwhelming majority anymore either. I feel that if I was invested in the EEnE fandom back in 2013-2014 I would absolutely be tired of Kevin, but that isn't really the case anymore. As far as I can see lol.

8. Common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about? That all the Kanker sisters (excluding May) are irredeemable and will never break out of whatever cycle they are present to at home. I mean, I'm not asking for any neatly packaged happy ending when I say that, but idk, despite my issues with their lack of development and presentation on the show, I think they are really interesting. If you want to get deep, they are just kids after all, with a lot of room for change in their life going forward. I like to think that they ALL go onto better things. Better can be open to interpretation. I do not mean any kind of stereotypical college degree manicured lawn and job type stuff. Satisfaction can look like a multitude of things. A lot of people apply this to May, which is great! But does that have to mean pushing aside Marie and Lee in the process? I personally don't think that is very fair.

9. Worst part of canon? Harassment when it is girls towards boys = funny : / Also, this is more of a fandom thing, but there are so many youtube videos where ppl are titling them stuff like "Kanker sisters RAPE Eds" like wow so edgy and funny guys how about we keep this in 2009?

13. Worst blorbofication? Absolutely Edd. No argument. I don't think that this is an unpopular sentiment nowadays either. It has been discussed to earth and back at this point.

16. You can't understand why so many people like this thing: - That in high school/college Edd will make a complete 360 change in personality and become a complete bad-boy shadow the hedgehog recolor. Granted, I do think that Edd will grow to tone down his anxiety over following rules, BUT to completely change is out of the question. This is still Edd we're talking about. Rebelling for him would be something like jaywalking or wearing shoes inside someone's house he doesn't like. It nags me a bit when people completely ignore the defined quirks and personality of a character in favor of creating a whole new oc. You can of course be inspired by a character you like to create your own, but how about present them as that? - That Edd will start to drift away from Eddy and Ed as he grows older, or the other way around and Eddy and/or Ed drift away from Edd. I don't get how this head-canon keeps popping up. The WHOLE point of the show is their friendship and that they are blood brothers and meant for each other!!! This goes beyond their diverging interests and personalities!! The actual show proved this with the movie!! "But lots of people don't stay friends with the people they knew from childhood" umm and lots of people do? I am still closest with my middle school friends then any other people I've met in adulthood. My dad doesn't talk to anyone from university but still meets up with his childhood friends. And even so, I just don't understand the appeal. Their friendship kind of IS the whole show, and doing away with that ultimately defeats the purpose for me. I find it a lot more interesting to delve into aspects like how they would uphold these connections and friendships into adulthood, when work and responsibilities makes it a lot harder to get together regularly.

19. You're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like... Ngl I can't help feeling kind of shy about being super invested in a slapstick cartoon that came out nearly three decades ago. Even when I am talking to other cartoon/animation fans, I feel a bit silly about wanting to analyze their dynamics and traits when most people casually just remember the show as fun slapstick (of course it is but I also wanna get insane about it without being seen as MysteriousMrEnter or smth lmao).

21. Part of canon you think is overhyped? "What is under Double Dee's hat, guys?" "Why have they never confirmed what is under there?" "Any one else disappointed that they never showed Edd without his hat?" Umm idc lol

22. Your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores? - Probably the connection between Ed and Double Dee. I think it is really cute. I love how so many episodes kind of have them hanging out together. I don't think people acknowledge enough how their dynamic works. It is very Autism 2 Autism, like Edd gets to kind of info-dump about whatever to Ed, and even if Ed has no clue what he is talking about, he still enjoys the company and has fun in listening and partaking in whatever Edd is invested in. - I always really dig how Nazz is depicted kind of "cool" and "sporty". Idk it could have been very easy to make her just any kind of popular girl trope, but she kind of holds her own (even if she is super underdeveloped compared to the other characters). I think it makes her friendship with Kevin interesting. - On that note, I also really like Kevin and Rolf's dynamics in their friendship. I do actually see people discuss this a bunch, but I felt like I had to mention it. I really like how the typical American Apple Pie jock is besties with the foreigner with odd customs and both are kind of at an equal footing to each other. - Sarah is insanely strong, like almost on the same level as Ed. What is in that family's genes??

24. Topic that brings up the most rancid discourse? Shipping, probably. (When is it not shipping).

[itchyeye]

Ok I will say. Hot take here but i think JM in s5 is not MEANT to be healthy. I think that’s the whole entire point. It’s never portrayed as healthy; they spend the whole time bickering and arguing and not trusting each other and being so horrifically extremely codependent it’s pointed out BY ONE OF THE AVATARS, THE LITERAL HARVESTERS OF HORROR. I think making them dysfunctional is entirely the point. The last episodes they appear in together they’re arguing about jon becoming GOD, martin is very obviously against it, and jon simply decides he Does Not Care. And i mean, in the grand scheme of things? Jon, well, he’s correct! Doom one world and not millions of others. Martin isn’t portrayed as correct here- (in ‘checking out’, Jon says he knows martin is fine with the theoretical suffering of others, but when he actually SEES it then he’ll be horrified- same logic applies to his take on release the fears vs keep em in 199) all of them are just.. people. With opinions. Not really any of them good, or the standard, or healthy in the slightest. If you’re constantly bickering with your boyfriend about the morality of consuming other people’s terror, asking him to smite people you dislike, and practically insulting him at some points.. i don’t think that’s an intentionally healthy portrayal. Jmart is purposefully dysfunctional in canon, and I don’t think it’s bad writing because of it. And it goes both ways, too! Jon can be pretty mean to Martin throughout the pod!! He insults him behind his back to vent his frustrations about their relationship! Because, hey, loving each other isn’t enough, you’ve got to Actually Make It Work. And they can’t (won’t?) ever do the latter.

Actually, another hot take: not a single relationship exists in tma without extremely jagged or messed up edges. Even the canon ones, especially jmart. Because it’s a hORROR PODCAST.

…evil murder husbands JE, though? I get what you guys mean, tbh. That may be the exception to the above rule.

Same anon as before, i just wanted to add that none of that is from a place of frustration I just want to have a discussion about s5 jmart tbh. I feel like how unhealthy jm is isn’t spoken about in the context of ‘what if it’s intentional?’ Because a lottt of people just assume it’s bad writing when. No, no, i think jonny knows what a healthy relationship looks like, and this absolutely isn’t it (and that is pointed out in-canon)

Outside of my jmart Thoughts, I absolutely adore your writing!! How you DESCRIBE things just completely sticks me in the room in a way I don’t usually experience when reading fic. I sadly don’t really have any jonelias prompts floating around up in me noggin (for NOW), but i just wanted to say that. You’re super cool! I like seeing your stuff on my dash! Sorry i’m an anon, also; I fear people may come for me with fire and pitchforks if i were to use my main lmao. You’re really great at writing their dynamic!!

hey! thank you for sharing your thoughts. i'm not really a productive person to have this conversation with though because i haven't listened past MAG 166 (I have previously said multiple times that I never got past episode 4 of s5. turns out that's incorrect! the last episode i got to was The Worms, I misremembered it as 4 episodes because the first 2 episodes of s5 take place in Daisy's safehouse, so I was counting the number of statement episodes i listened to. they were extremely disappointing so they stuck with me. the jmart plays house episodes i just blacked out i guess as a defense mechanism.)

so, i really can't weigh in on what you've said here because i haven't experienced this season and i'm not going to. publishing both to respond and because maybe other people would like to have this conversation with you and it's clear you've put a lot of thought into this understanding of the text!

what i will say though is that i don't doubt that jonny sims knows what a healthy relationship looks like. i'm not pretending i know anything about him or his irl marriage (besides the crazy and immediate chemistry he and sasha have solely as disembodied voices) but he does write a lot of healthy relationships from his statement givers. people who love and care about each other in romantic, platonic, and familial ways that feel real and three dimensional.

but i'm actually totally uninterested in what sort of healthy relationships he can write, though. i don't seek out healthy relationships in my fiction lmao i seek out interesting ones. i don't want my blorbos to talk to one another like they're on the couch at couple's therapy.

my problem with jmart isn't that it's "unhealthy", it's that it's rewarded by the narrative. i'm supposed to believe that jon and martin randomly getting together in 158/9 is a culmination of their hard work. a reprieve from their suffering. finally, after all that horror, they can end up together. it's a reward for them! it's immediately taken away and that's supposed to be the tragedy. of having had a glimpse at happiness, or having closed your fingers around it, and then it being snatched away.

it's like, have you seen the descent (2005)? if you haven't i recommend it, it's one of my favorite movies. good buried statement. if you liked Lost Johns' Cave you'll love the descent (2005). i'm gonna spoil it for you now though, so sorry if you haven't seen it.

there's a scene near the end where our sole survivor sees daylight. she crawls for like a mile with broken limbs over sharp rocks and her hand breaches the surface. she escapes into the open air. she screams in the most primal, life affirming, animalistic way as she breaths lung full after lung full of fresh air. and then we snap back to reality and she is miles and miles beneath the earth, hallucinating her salvation.

it's really really affecting. it's such a gut punch. you think, huh, we're close to the end of our runtime, i've really come to care about this person. i'm so relieved that she's getting out. i'm experiencing her euphoria at finally escaping. and then it's all ripped away from you. it's incredible!!!

that's what 158 - 160 was supposed to be. jmart in their little scottish cabin with their little highland cows was the fresh air. except ,well, it didn't taste like fresh air to me! it felt like turning around 180* and crawling back into the dark. i think jon and martin are awful for one another but more than that: i don't believe that they find comfort in one another.

one of the chief draws of jon/elias is that elias is a reprieve for jon. he's the one person in his life who he is close to that doesn't hate him. that doesn't verbally abuse him as soon as he catches sight of him. he's also the person responsible for turning him into a monster but listen, you win some you lose some. every relationship has give and take. i: isolate you from everyone you know and drag you deeper into your paranoia. you: crawl to me for comfort only i can give you. romance!

i don't see the doomed romance that people who like jmart talk about because i don't see the two of them ever enjoying one another's company. i don't see anything that they have in common. i see them sort of hunker down as s1's sole survivors but even then, martin is pulling away from jon as hard as he can. we as the audience know this is because of peter, but basira tells jon it's because his mom died (??????) and he hates him too (?????).

so, i don't think that jmart is bad writing because it's supposed to be a great relationship and it's actually really unhealthy. i think jmart is bad writing because their plot arc hinges on me believing, despite 160 episodes giving ample evidence to the contrary, that they are in love with one another. maybe it's bad love, maybe it's a lie or an illusion or a veneer. whatever. i still need to believe (i the audience, the beholder in whose eye this is playing out) that they are in love. with one another.

and i honestly can't even picture them further than arm's length apart.

um also turning around to twirl my hair thank you SO much for your kind words about my writing D: i really appreciate that, it means a lot!!! i think it's obvious i care about this podcast a lot and i spend a lot of time thinking about it so thank you for sharing your thoughts with me and for reading my stuff. you are welcome here on or off anon, i'll also happily not publish things if you would like me not to publish them.

[kallistcs]

repost and rate your muse's traits out of 10 in each category !

★  ⸻   COMPASSION: 6/10. Paris is honestly probably more sympathetic than actively compassionate, but either way his priority in acting lies more in either of these sentiments than things such as a consideration of "duty" or similar.

★  ⸻   BITTERNESS: 0/10. At most maybe a 1. Ought he be a little bitter, perhaps? Would it be reasonable he be bitter? Sure it would. Somehow, he is not.

★  ⸻   HAPPINESS: 8/10. Circumstances notwithstanding. Paris can find joy even where he perhaps ought not, but he's lighthearted at his core and nothing can suppress this for long. In a no-war situation he'd be hovering somewhere between 8-10/10

★  ⸻   POLITENESS: 7-9/10. It all depends on who you are, really, and the circumstances. Paris' default approach, whether polite or not, is mild-mannered, so unless he's going out of his way to get insulting, a less polite approach might be missed.

★  ⸻   MORALITY: 5/10. Given Paris is capable, able, and willing to break rules/concepts such as is held basically sacrosanct (xenia), if that is what is needed. Mostly to avoid doing something in a way he would not like, though it might cause less offense in general. Modern reincarnation would bump this up to an 8, I'd say, given changing cultural mores and values and such. (Now, since my interpretation and the events/actions I acknowledge actually ignore a number of more "immoral" things he does in certain versions, maybe that number should be lower. On the other hand, the attack on Sidon/the king is construed as more xenia-breaking and since no version actually gives a full account of this, no way to know how it was presented. I ignore it because it really doesn't jive with his priorities/actions/personality in the Iliad.)

★  ⸻   CHIVALRY: 7/10. Part of several other qualities and even deliberate methods (like seduction), but also genuine.

★  ⸻   PRIDE: 1/10. I mean. At best that should be a 2/10. Paris has little pride, given how he's fine with with being talked to and about, as well as looked at, in terms of his reputation and actions.

★  ⸻   HONESTY: 7/10. He doesn't generally lie, but he is perfectly capable and willing to lie by omission, or lie outright, if it should be necessary.

★  ⸻   BRAVERY: 3-4/10. /flaps hand at canon. But given that he's also capable of being on the battlefield - and at the front of it! - with little complaint even in a sticky situation (Book 13), I'm not shuffling his score down to a 2.

★  ⸻   RECKLESSNESS: 5/10. Recklessness in combat situation is (generally) lower. In other circumstances, however...

★  ⸻   AMBITION: 4/10. Not really ambitious - it's more, perhaps, that in the few things he does devote himself to gain he will do his best to get. (Sure, choosing "the most beautiful woman in the world" is its own sort of ambition, but if he was really ambitious he would have chosen either Hera or Athena, and make more of an attempt to not let his cowardice hold him back on the battlefield.)

★  ⸻   LOYALTY: 8/10. Paris does leave Oenone (though the way I conceive of this is more complicated than little loyalty to the relationship), and loyalty alone can't win over his faults to prompt him more consistent and strong participation in the war. But he also doesn't leave/give up on Helen even when the situation (and the relationship) gets as bad as it does (setting aside if he even could), and he also doesn't leave Troy.

★  ⸻   LOVE: 10/10. This is part of what he is, after all. A huge, massive, part, to a fault since ideally it should be weighed up by some other virtues to make this a virtue, too, instead of a partial fault.

★  ⸻   SENSE OF FAMILY: 8/10. Like the comment for loyalty above, Paris isn't flawlessly motivated by this. But on the other hand he also does stay and fight, and Hektor is the one who can either shame or persuade him to do what he "should".

★  ⸻   ATTRACTIVENESS: 10/10. Lmao. It might not be his only excellence but if this boy wasn't hot there might on the one hand be less trouble (might - considering some versions of the Judgement makes clear Aphrodite could/would make him attractive/beloved to all anyway), but on the other hand he'd not even have this to fall back on as something viewed positively (and negatively).

★  ⸻   AGILITY: 9/10. One of Paris' physical strengths and definitely what he relies more on in battle than strength itself.

★  ⸻   SEX DRIVE: 10/10. Lol. Lmao, even. Could put an infinity symbol instead of the ten - would probably be more correct! Paris' sex drive is of course part of the problem, aside from his romantic side and ability to be seductive.

[quodekash]

OKAY it took me a few days but ive finally finished the second msp our skyy episode (i finished it two days ago lmao) and here are the thoughts i had while watching. good luck, this is gonna be a mess (and likely will need multiple parts as per usual) 

bro they werent kidding about multiverse of cuteness, that was on point 

“no weakness. i only find cuteness. hes so damn cute” IM FREAKING OBSESSED WITH THESE PARALLELS WHAT THE HELL 

omg tinn is standing literally right there what the hell thats hilarious 

OMG THEYRE GONNA DO THE SCHOOL SLEEPOVER THINGY GHREBGHSB 

“ask him to join you for a late night walk, invite him to go swimming” bro i swear por’s watched the series for the original universe or smth bc he really knows everything 

KAJORN 

MY BOY 

HELLO 

i love him 

YEEEEE JORN HUG DISTRACTIONNNNN 

he really just wants a hug 

he just wants others to be proud of him 🥺🥺 

man im so glad my msp hyperfixation is coming back bc ive desperately wanted to pull jorn apart and analyse him but i lost motivation to before i could so hopefully i finally will in the coming weeks 

OMG DRUNK TINN I FORGOT THAT THIS PART WOULD HAPPEN 

(i would like to take a moment to point out sounds face in that screenshot. thank you that is all.) 

PLS I LOVE HIM, HES SO PRECIOUS 

OMG-- 

(i would like to take a moment to point out yo’s face in that screenshot. thank you that is all) 

the way tiw is standing there smiling sweetly and fidgeting with the hem of his shirt bc his boyfriend is in the room and is witnessing how stupid his friend group is so hes nervous but also he loves his boyfriend so much and cant keep his face out of a smile- im sorry i love them too much 

AND THE WAY POR SEES THE SITUATION ESCALATING AND HE MAKES A FACE AT TIW AND GESTURES TO THE BOTTLE AND TIW GRABS THE BOTTLE GBRDFHGBDRJHB 

the attention to detail is astounding 

i love them all so much 

“this is sake we add to the soup. tinn was worried you guys wouldnt believe it, so he took a little sip. just a tiny sip.” (im sorry i just have to point out the way he gestures the tiny sip- ghdgbhf its so sweet and tiny and I WANT TO HUG HIM AND PINCH HIS CHEEKS AND HGBREHB) 

“come on. who would be stupid enough to believe that?? he could’ve just emptied the bottle. theres no need to drink it.” fiNALLY, someone with BRAIN CELLS 

ah what a lovely frame 

(LOOK AT THE WAY FOURTH IS STANDING, ITS SO TINY, SO PRECIOUS, HE IS BABY) 

(no i dont care that he’s literally 20 centimetres taller than me, HE IS BABY) 

“let’s just disband” yo with the disbanding again 

i should make a list of how many times yo suggests disbanding 

ive made a list of pat and disbanding 

i need to rewatch the os2 episodes and also see if win still asks a lot of questions or if its sound this time, and whichever one it is, im gonna write down all of the questions like i did for win and im gonna analyse it 

wait hang on would yo being the disbanding guy affect potential for patjorn?? cos my main piece of evidence for them is the disbanding thing, but phat isnt the ‘we should disband’ guy anymore so.. ??? 

wait hang on 

WAIT HANG ON 

IS THIS WHAT I THINK IT IS 

WAIT WHAT 

OH MY GOODNESS 

HOLY BAJOOLIES 

HOLY FREAKING IN THE NAME OF OUR LORD AND SAVIOUR OISHI ICE TEA WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL 

I SHIP PATJORN, BUT I NEVER THOUGHT THEYD ACTUALLY DO IT 

WHAT 

awww 

IM LITERALLY CRYING THIS IS TOO FREAKING SWEET 

HEEEEEEEELP 

GUYS YOU DO REALISE WHAT THIS MEANS RIGHT??? 

lemme break it down without yelling 

all the ships in canon happen in this universe as well. all the characters still have their same personalities, and therefore (presumably) would still have the same feelings as they do in canon. 

and here, jorn says he plays the bad guy and pressures the music club so that theyre serious and then win hot wave and then can date. 

what this means is, in canon, pat still has his isaan accent. pat still does the little “oh” thing. jorn still plays the bad guy and pressures them a lot. 

the only differences: 1. pat has glasses, which honestly just feels like more reason for jorn to like phat (”the way his glasses frame his face and make his big round eyes look slightly larger”). 2. pat is constantly suggesting that they disband. 3. jorn seems to want the band to stop being a thing, rather than pressuring them to do better and practice harder, but that’s presumably because in the canon universe, its not really common knowledge that the band cant date until after hot wave, whereas in this universe the characters seem to know without needing to find out from an external source (which is probably for plot convenience for time’s sake, but shut up it works), so, chances are in canon jorn just isnt aware that there are other options and thinks they have to leave the band in order to date. 4. definitely other things i just cant think of them rn 

what im tryna say here is all the evidence points towards patjorn being possible in canon as well as this universe. i will break this down further in a future post but for now i need to get on with this commentary 

HIS SMILE 

HIS HAPPY LITTLE SMILE 

HE MAKES ME SO HAPPY 

“from now on, we’ll help music club win hot wave, so i... i mean, so you, kajorn” lmao nice save buddy. real subtle there. 

OMG POR’S GRIN 

HIS EVIL LITTLE GRIN 

EVEN PATJORN IS JUST GOOD NEWS FOR TIWPOR 

THIS ENTIRE THING- everything is just leading towards tiwpor. this has just become a tiwpor series 

and im so happy about it 

HIS SMILE 

I LOVE IT WHEN HE SMILES 

HE DOESNT OFTEN SMILE 

HES SO HAPYYYYYY 

HE MAKES ME HAPPY 

GEIURKJBSG 

I LOVE HIM 

their “to the music club! yeah!!” IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY THEY MAKE ME SO HAPPY I LOVE THEM ALL SO MUCH 

THEY ARE RUNNING 

AND JORN IS WITH THEM 

JORN IS PART OF THEIR GROUP NOW 

HES PART OF THE SQUAD 

HOLY HELL 

THERE ARE TIMES WHERE I LIKE THIS UNIVERSE MORE THAN THE CANON UNIVERSE AND THIS IS ONE OF THOSE MANY MANY TIMES 

jeez i was expecting to dislike these episodes and im ending up enjoying it as much, if not more, than the actual series. how did this happen. 

it’s literally been two days since i finished the episode and started writing out the thoughts i had while watching and im only 8 and a half minutes through the episode. this may take a while. 

yayyy tinngun 

OMG SOUNDWIN 

“no way. i wont exhaust myself for nothing.” mood 

lmao 

omg taking advantage of the leg thing i love them so much (ft tiwpor in the background) 

I LOVE HIM HES SO CARING I LOVE HIM SO SO MUCH 

i love them 

i love them so much 

ive said it too much but its just so true 

i love them with all my soul 

TIWPOR BEING BOYFRIENDSSSSS 

guys i love them so much i love them so freaking much 

and their dainty little jog? UGH I LOVE THEM 

“nice shirt.” “i know, right? my boyfriend bought it for me. you should ask your boyfriend to buy one for you.” “im wearing what my boyfriend bought for me.” “no wonder it looks just as nice.” I LOVE THEM SO MUCHHHHHH 

ALL OF THE SHIPS 

ALL OF THEM ARE GETTING SCREENTIME 

AND ITS LIKE ACTUAL SCREEN TIME NOT JUST TINY CRUMBS 

IM SOBBING I LOVE THEM SO 

oh 

oh no 

now yo is lonelyyyyy 

im sorry yoooo 

SOMEONE GET NOOK IN THE BUILDING, PLEASE, IM BEGGING YOU, YO NEEDS HAPPINESS 

THEYRE PHAT-ING HIM AND MAKING HIM SAD AND LONELY 

NOOK NOW, PLEASE AND THANK YOU 

never fear, the oishi ice tea is here!! 

we’ve got the oishi ice tea, you know what that means? 

it’s time for a cute gay moment!! 

i smell a sponsorship. 

i also smell tinngun about to be cute and gay. 

the oishi ice tea is always the answer. 

(if you know exactly what posts of mine from the past im referencing here, you get a cookie and a high five bc damn. if you’re curious as to what i mean, merry christmas, merry christmas, and merry christmas) 

“it serves you right for bullying me. i deserve a good thing.” YES YOU DO, TINN, BEST BOI 

i ran out of images again (i suspect this will be another four-parter, perhaps five, who knows) 

(also a little note here, i put all my our skyy 2 commentary under the same tag and its always the first tag of the post, so if you tap/click on that one youll find the rest of my commentary on the episode (if you want to)) 

[exantivancrow]

hi again! 👀, 💘, 🧸 for any OC(s) you'd like? :3

hi laya! i got rohan as requested but i've been thinking about my og blorbo keala lately so she's on here too with the other canon ocs. ty for the ask!! sorry it got really long lmao.

does your oc believe that they are attractive? do they use that to their advantage?

rohan never noticed appreciative stares because they only lasted as long as it took to see his brand. on the surface, he was kind of busy, but zevran taught him how to use his body as a weapon in more ways than one.

nicholas is hot and he knows it. he uses it as conflict deescalation. he'll make a joke when his friends personalities clash, he'll distract the guard/nobility from a target so they can escape, etc. other than that, norah might kill him if he tries to use his "feminine wiles" on her one more time. it doesn't' work. stop flexing your biceps. (in the background, varric is banging his head on the table).

cody doesn't personally find herself attractive? but she knows other people do, and totally abuses this power. when she was a barkeep, it was to get better tips and politer customers, as herald to earn more favor, and as cody, it's solely to win friends and influence cullen. cullen has no power in their relationship, his girlfriend is too pretty and rewards him for good behavior, he's completely useless.

keala is attractive but doesn't pay any attention to it at all, and frequently forgets, so no, she doesn't use it.

is your oc a good flirt? are they charming?

rohan is incredibly charming in an innocuous kind of way! and he's not a good flirt in the way that his method of flattery involves telling people that they way they use that knife is really sexy. which really only works on zevran.

nicholas is very charming, and a great flirt. when it comes to women, it's the follow-through he has trouble with. he doesn't know how to take it any further. the bigger problem is once he gets with fenris he doesn't know how to turn the charm off. stop hitting on him! his boyfriend might glare you to death!

cody is an incorrigible flirt. she's terrible at understanding the difference between being friendly and flirting, so most people think she is when she's not. but also, all of her inquisition friends have been on the receiving end before. from cassandra to solas to bull to rylen, she flirts, and they all know she only means it playfully. she and bull are pretty bad about it, but she and rylen are actually worse. they're both solely teasing cullen. he's tired of both of them.

keala is charming in an unintentional way. she's just so earnest about how nice you look today, that you can't help but be endeared.

into public displays of affection or are they more reserved?

rohan will never really get over the idea that it's not safe to show affection. don't let anyone know that you have a weakness, a soft spot. that being said, he will still show affection just in a reserved way about it. brushing against zevran without real intention or purpose. acts of service. eye-fucking, yknow, the usual. things he can get away with in public.

fenris takes a while to open up to public affection. nicholas respects his boundaries about it. when it comes to the hightown market? a brief hand brush or caress is fine. when it comes to their friends, a casual kiss or grope is fine. when the agregio comes out, one will be lucky to avoid having to bleach one's eyes.

cody is as openly affectionate as she can be while still being professional. she has a public image to maintain or josie will kill her and then thedas is doomed, so despite wanting to pinch cullen's ass on the practice yard, for the good of thedas, she cannot.

keala is very openly affectionate! facial kisses, holding hands, or delrin's personal favorite, coming up behind him when he's not in full plate, and wrapping her arms around his waist and pressing her face into his shoulder blades.

[jack-kellys]

You know I want hunted stuff

ok this is from when i was asking ppl to send me aus to speak on

hi claire im in class so here's whats next for hunted tbh...it is sitting in my docs...promise

so we left off on jack needing an alibi that isn't just katherine describing their last hookup. right. so basically jack and davey are going to spend the evening together, since davey wants to help jack clear his name (and davey needs jack's name out of the NYPD's mouth so they can have no suspects again). it'll eat up the time bewteen 7pm to 12am, which was around the time of death for the first victim.

charlie doesn't like davey claiming to be the best forensics guy so he's like fuck this, i need to meet this guy, i'm hanging out with you guys. charlie will instantly regret this decison.

what u have to understand about both jack and davey is that.. they are both bad people. like ok obviously daveys a serial killer so he's bad, but he's also ruthless with others when trying to do what he believes is "right", he's obsessive, snappy, curt, unkind. pretty scathing.

and jack! oh he believes himself a good guy for leaving the force in the dust, but he had been in it, he had fallen victim to copaganda. and he's narcissistic, egotistical, hot-headed, competitive, snarky, and closed-off and kinda mean. they're both like. bad!

and charlie has to be at this fucking alibi session. while jack and davey bicker and jab and sneer and oh my god, i'm leaving, good fucking luck to you both.

and then jack and davey are left alone, perhaps a few adult beverages in. what possibly could occur.

but everything in this is a strategy, right. what does the other gain at another's expense? what is the other's expense? they're both kind of detectives so they actively look for how to make the other tick.

ill get back to it at some point, but its like so far removed from canon that it feels like writing a novel whenever i open the doc LMAO