#also can we talk about how bloody good of a title that is? like cmon now

[perfectly-clear-from-here]

I refuse to believe that tranquility base hotel and casino was released a solid 5 years ago- *rubs eyes* HUH? THIS BLOODY MASTERPIECE HAS BEEN ACTUALIZED FOR HOW LONG NOW?

[captain-ed-tucker]

The True Maniac

You are the chosen one, they say. You are meant to be the savior of the world, they say. All those words, they are my company every day, day after day, they follow me, stalk me, haunt me everyday of my life, it's almost insane. Wait...it IS  insane. Funny you should say that really cause ya know, I knew this gal the other day who had a hot ass and gosh she was cute and I could go on and on...oh...oops...I went on one of my rants again. I'm sorry. I'm rude. I should start again. My name is Johnny Lawrence and you are probably one of the voices and people that come through my head each and every day, you all keep me company, it's kinda sweet, but in a creepy way. But I'm the step son of Sid Weinburg, he's the CEO of Texaco and Time Warner, yes, that guy on TV that asks you for more subscriptions, that creepy greasy guy is my step dad, funny you should ask why the bloody hell am I related to that guy in the first place. Ah, it's a long story really, I hope you have patience cause I'm probably gonna ramble and ramble and go off on maniac induced episodes where my thoughts might not connect with my words and my stories may seem more fantastical than usual, it's all up to you to whether to believe me or not, I don't care if you don't, nobody has believed me in a long while.

You still here? Wow. I'm suprised, most voices and people tend to go away after awhile, you are creepy as hell, after my imaginary dead brother York, who by the way never existed, nor was ever born. I hope for the sake of my story, no York was ever born in San Francisco, it's highly unlikely, but hey, you never know.

Oh and by the way, I lost my girlfriend becuase of a BLIP, lost my title for the All Valley Championship cause I was concussed and dizzy and hallucinating, only to be fucking crane kicked in the face. But hey, at least I have a job as a Rad Tech and am living on my own, so ha! You can't call me a basement dweller since I live in a apartment all by myself overlooking the ocean and ninety percent of the time, I see tourists hanging out there taking selfies and making out like it is some sort of lover's nest. Ugh, I guess I get what I pay for...literally...I got this place on the cheap side with the help of AdBuddy since I could barely afford it on my own and rent is fucking up my savings, like C'mon, stop fucking me up here damn it! And not to mention the fact that my REAL step brother's trial Ryan Weinberg, who has been accused of sexual harassment at the workplace and I was named as a witness, my step dad wants me to lie on the stand...can I do that? I mean... that just feels so wrong, very wrong. Tell me I'm not the only one that I'm feeling this way, cause I have no idea what to do next.

Oh...great Jed is here, wait just a minute while I talk to him.

"What are you doing here?"

"Oh Johnny, just here to deliver your latest mission, the details will be soon revealed as you go."

"Don't you think this is not the right time?"

"Oh but it is."

"Oh and by the way, you will have a handler, she has a certain Jai sais ne qoui about her. You will know her when you see her...DON'T FUCK THIS UP!"

Okay...now Jed has left and I'm still stuck with you. You have this intense, scruffy look about you...I can tell you really are a curious person, you aren't like the others before...that's interesting. Most have tried to change me, give me orders or tell me that I'm chosen or some bullshit...some of those days I'm convinced of that bullshit and actually believing it, the scariest part is not hearing a lie, it's believing the lie and perpetuating the lie. I get up and head to my apartment and flick all my pills that are there to "fix" me...you can't fix what is broken and I am broken.

I also find the package for Neberdine Pharmaceuticals and Biotechnology. Odd...they never send me anything, I haven't even heard of them at all. It is scary and creepy though, I wonder if the FBI is watching me, I might close the curtains and I should...you think I could be watched...right? I...I feel like everything has eyes and cameras and ears and mics and all the tech in the world to enhance interrogate me before I have a chance to defend myself...wait...the phone is ringing...I have to pick it up, just wait here ok?

"He...hello? Who is this?"

"This is Neberdine Pharmaceuticals and Biotechnology research institute inc. Speaking, we are here to speak to you becuase you have been chosen as a "Hero" Candidate"

"Well...what DOES a hero candidate do?"

"Well we have them do experiments that others normally do not do and we treat all sorts of problems, including prostate problems"

"Popcorn problems?"

"Yes popcorn problems."

"Thank you...I'll consider it."

I hang up the phone in utter confusion and now you are looking at me like I'm an idiot! STOP STARING AT ME JOHN KREESE! STOP!

END OF PART ONE

I get up and, oh...fuck, you are there again, well done you asshole, you are still with me. Oh well, I don't have time to yell and holler at you, I have to get ready and go to work and then head over to my parents house, my brother is celebrating his engagement to Adelade and they are going to announce a wedding date and it all is amongst this scandal of his sexual harassment of a clerk. I have no ideas what I feel or where I stand anymore.

Work is a boring affair as you can tell, you're already doing your kiyakis and forward thrust punches and I'm busy as hell scanning patients and I have lots of paperwork, not to mention the decontamination process I have to go through every day just for health purposes so I'm not literally emitting X Rays by the time I leave the hospital.

Getting rides on the tube to my parent's mansion is very expensive for now since my budget has been tightened becuase I went on a mania induced spending spree and I racked up so many charges and fees from gambling with the furries and casinos are never happy to see me, I never understood why that was the case.

Regardless, I have to call on an AdBuddy and he soon comes over and inserts funds into my account, but in exchange, I have to view a bunch of ads that are read aloud by the AdBuddy and one of them is about Neberdine Pharmaceuticals and Biotechnology. Neberdine is everywhere...the pattern is the pattern, there is a larger force at work here and I'm sure of it. I know it, I can feel it at work, it's a bit mysterious to others, but not me, I'm the only one who understands how this works at all.

I can see you have cleaned up real nicely for the occasion and I thank you for that, I have to admit Sensei, you really look handsome in a suit, it really suits you...get it? Hahaha! Oh...I see you don't get the joke? Oh...ok, oh well then. I then go in and hand my coat to the butler and head up the stairs through the foyer and then meet my parents, my step mom and my step dad, both are looking regal tonight since their oldest firstborn is celebrating his engagement again since my "Incident". I hate to admit it but the nieces and nephews are the only reason I even bother show up to family functions at all, I hate this fake, plastic family filled with Barbies and Ken's, I want something more than this Kreese...but what is it I want?

Soon my brother Ryan is busy singing and wooing Adelade and she's smiling and tearing up and all that sappy shit, I wonder if she's marrying him for the money, I would hate for that to happen to Ryan, I had my own experience with Ali Mills and it didn't end well at all.

Soon the adults want to play balderdash but honestly, I feel suffocated and I wanted out of here as soon as possible, the fakeness was getting to me and I can hear them begging me

"Aw cmon! You used to love balderdash"

"Balderdash is fun!"

"Really? What's wrong, play with us!"

"Please play with us! Just one round! I promise!"

At that, I just can't stand it anymore, there is a roaring fury in me that explodes and I yell at the top of my lungs

"BALDERDASH IS STUPID! IT'S BULLSHIT!"

One of my nieces burst out in tears and I can only look on in guilt as as my other brother Andrew glares at me angrily, great...another brother that hates me...fun. I storm out and I see you following me, why do you follow me? Leave me alone, just let me get a smoke, at that moment I can see one of the dog shit cleaners whirr by, it's a small machine the height of my ankle and it sucks in the shit and sprays the sidewalk clean and I walk past and go home...I have to do this, this is everything I will do, to sign up for the trial and to cast you out for good, you had a great run but you need to fuck off.

I arrive at a grey concrete bulding with narrow Rainbow stripes running up the side and I can see the sign of the bulding is in Japanese and I enter and a Japanese woman coldly greets me and hands me a clipboard filled with paperwork, judging on the amount I have, I'm gonna be here a long time just filling out papers. Fuck my life. Another guy next to me adds "Ooo five bombs eh? See that? That's where the money comes from." Sure enough, there are five bomb logos printed on it and I add

"Is it safe?"

"Hell no! The more dangerous, the more money! That is usually how it goes."

I look down at the form and then sign it and turn it in and the intercom says

"Johnny Lawrence to intake exam room four"

The Asian woman bows before me and I bow back and I sit down in the chair, I'm apparently going to be strapped to a lie detector machine. The blood pressure cuff is slipped on my arm and a pulse ox device is placed on my finger and a galvanic skin response device is placed across my chest, she then asks me to tell her how I feel when I see a series of photos. I can hear the clicking of the machine as the metal needles move up and down the paper, leaving trails of red, recording my reactions and my responses and she starts with the first photo which is a bottle of pills and I reply

"Poisoned"

The next picture is of a family, sitting around a table and enjoying a meal and I reply

"Suffocated"

I then see a ink blot and I reply

"Confused."

The test goes on and soon she says "I want you to turn your attention towards me as I ask you this final question." And I look up into her expressionless eyes and I hear a ding and the green light next to me lights up and she said "Congratulations, you have passed the test, you are now in the ULP Phase III trial." She bowed at me and I bowed one last time and I left the exam room, perplexed at what was the final question. I sit down, holding my badge that is labeled with the number 1 on it and as I look up, I see a man I never thought I would ever see again in the flesh, Daniel LaRusso and he is yelling at a test protocor screaming "This is bullshit and you know it! PATRICIA LUGO!" And he storms off after the woman that handed me the clipboard, I don't know what does he want with her but FUCKK!!! HE WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE HERE! DAMMIT!

End of part Two

I get up for the day and I stretch the kinks and massage my knee, fuck, that knee has been giving me so much chronic pain for so long, I have resorted to opiates to at least bring the edge down, it doesn't help much with my life, I don't have a job becuase I'm labeled a "Drug addict."

I'm a drug addict for trying to relive chronic, never ending pain from the shattered knee, it's the same knee that suffered a devastating injury at the tournament and yet I managed to defeat Lawrence, Chozen worsened the injury and when I worked in construction, an accident shattered the knee and now I have to put it in a brace so it doesn't cave in on the weight that I put on my knee.

I slip on the brace and grab a stack of magazines and some cash and walk to the nearby store and ask for some cigarettes, the clerk asks me how I am going to pay and I snap

"I'm gonna pay with an AdBuddy."

"No AdBuddy payments accepted here."

I groan and pull out what little change I have and I slam it on the countertop and then he hands me my cigars and I light them, soon I feel a bliss sink over me as I limp back to the shared apartment I have with the others and I run to my room...I NEED THAT PILL! I want to suffer in a way that my knee can never give me suffering, this is the suffering that makes me scream and want to tear out my soul and I have begged for death so many times, but really, I am alone.

San Francisco is a boring as hell city, I moved here when my mom died seven years ago, I gave up hoping for healing, my opioids and my cigarettes were all I ever needed now a days. I swipe the drawer open and open the bottle. The pill is shaped in the letter "A" and I sigh, this is my last pill. I say

"This is it, you are my last pill, then it's fuck you forever."

I then sit on the couch in the cramped and messy living room and I grab the remote control and mash the pill up and snort it all up and gosh...I'm in it.

I wake up hours later, I'm in tears yes, but I am alive, this pain reminds me that I am alive, that I am breathing and that I am fighting, that I'm still awake and that I'm still ok. But I have to pay someone a visit, someone I haven't visited in forever, someone that I haven't spoken to in forever.

I then go to my wallet and yell at my roommate

"Who stole my money?"

"Well you haven't paid your share of the rent in two months!"

"MAYBE IT'S BECUASE I HAVE CHRONIC PAIN AND I CAN'T WORK! I'M ON DISABILITY!"

Oh wow...way to go you son of a bitch, you had to screw that up. Well then, let's try another tactic, the puppy brown eyes and some pleasing.

"Well can I at least have twenty bucks?"

"Well then, fine take some. Calm down junkie!"

Oh Fuck you bitch, like you had your knee kicked in and your knee crushed by some careless truck driver who was high on No-Doze to realize you were nearly under the fucking truck.

I snatch the bill from her hand and I go to my cousin Louie's home, as usual, he is in his A-Void pod, that antisocial idiot hates everybody, well I need his money and I need it now, I'm a man on a mission and nothing is going to stop me. One problem, he changed the combination to the safe and I grunt and I head out to the backyard and i find the pod and press the button and say

"Hey Cousin? How are you?"

A mechanical click and then he replies

"Fine."

I snort

"Your yard looks like a fucking mess."

And it literally is a fucking mess.

"Oh um...what's the combination to the safe."

Another click and a whirr and he replies

"I changed the combination to the safe."

"Thanks for the information Captain Obvious. So what is it?"

"Your birthday."

Really? Fuck you.

"I brought you something to eat."

"Applejacks?"

"Yea."

I slam the cereal on the table top in the dining room which looks like it has seen better days, I step over rubbish and junk from the good old days and I then enter the combination and then I grab the money and then leave, funny how my cousin used to be married until his wife was shot to death while coming back to work, I guess in a way, he can't move on from his loss like I can't move on from mine.

I stand at the bus station, ready to buy the bus ticket to Newark, but as soon as I want to enter the bus station, I want the A pill, I want it so badly, I can't resist the urge and I mutter a "Fuck you" and run off. I'm so ashamed and angry, I am weak and pathetic, that's all I'll ever be.

I approach my friend Kamreon who is playing chess with a foul mouthed furrie and the man is winning and Kameron is my source of these pills, I know that he can get me to them, I know so. I approach him and I ask

"I need more A pills."

"I can't, these pills are really hard to procure! These are from my dad's work!"

"Then how do I get into Neberdine?"

"Sign up for a study, help my dad make millions, for all I know, you could be testing deodorant for a week."

Fuck no, I am NOT going that route, to just end up testing deodorant, no way!

"Gimme a name Kameron! Any name!"

I slide over a one hundred dollar bill and he sighs and gives in before replying

"Patricia Lugo, and can I say something as your friend?"

"Yeah?"

"You sound like a junkie."

I roll my eyes and reply

"I am NOT a junkie!"

And I run off to a store that can dox that woman and give me something to work with.

End of part three

I soon arrive at the doxxing shop and a bored Asian man looks up at me and asks

"What can I do?"

I look to the side before scribbling onto a notepad and hold it up to the Plexar glass barrier and the unamused looking man adds

"Can't read your shit writing."

I roll my eyes before adding

"Lugo. Patricia Lugo of Neberdine Pharmaceuticals and Biotechnology."

A few clicks of the keyboard later and a click of a mouse and he continues

"Patricia Lugo was arrested for disorderly conduct and public intoxication, had her arrest records wiped by ZipDox in order to get the job at Neberdine. But, ZipDox's records can be easily unscrubbed and that's why I call ZipDox, ShitDox. If you want more, you gotta pay us more than she paid ShitDox to get her records scrubbed. I'll say...500 dollars, and you get a free calendar as a frequent customer."

I sigh and slip the Bill's under the glass partition and he hands the calendar over and then adds further

"Patricia Lugo lost custody of her daughter Usnavy after the arrest and her daughter goes to Hunter College. I could have her daughter kidnapped, I know a few guys with a white van."

I shake my head, I don't want anybody hurt, that's the last thing I want, for anybody to get hurt in my search, my quest for the A pill. Nobody should get caught up in my quest for me to drown myself in self-misery and self-pity. He then adds

"It also says she has a FriendProxy appointment at the Bonsai Gardens."

"I'll be there."

"Ooo interception. Sneaky I see."

He smiles snidely and I pay up and leave and then I cancel her FriendProxy appointment and get a lapel pin with a FriendProxy logo on it and then I stride over to the gardens, they remind me again of someone I lost, someone I cared about, someone who meant so much to me in a fatherly way, the bonsai trees remind of him so much, it is really painful, and suddenly, she comes over and embraces me, breaking me from my thoughts and she says without a second thought.

"Remember when we met here? At this same place?"

"Oh yeah...oh yeah, all the beautiful Bonsai trees. They remind me of so much."

"I wonder what are you talking about? I was talking about the moment we met? Remember when we also went to Chinatown and we went over the Golden Gate Bridge?"

"Oh yeah, and I remember when we went to see my uncle Liam."

"Now who the fuck is Uncle Liam?"

That question brings my thoughts to a screeching halt as she continues:

"Honey? Are you ok? What are your ratings? You do not seem compatible at all."

I'm fucking pissed off, I'm not compatible with anyone and to hell with that bullshit talking lady! All she seems to do is yammer off on a tangent that I sure as hell do not talk about. Before I can stop myself, I cut her off and say:

"Listen up, I'm here to fuck your life up, I canceled your FriendProxy appointment and I'm here to ruin you forever."

She is taken aback and shocked, she seemed a bit stunned by what I was saying and I'm not sure how to react to that as she slowly digests the information and she adds

"What are you talking about."

And what am I talking about? I haven't a fucking clue at all. Perhaps it's the drugs or the energy that's fizzling out but I feel so ashamed and embarrassed, I have no idea how the hell am I supposed to get her to funnel me at all, I quickly walk away to a hall overlooking a pond where koi fish swim around and I see her again and she says

"You know, you remind me of my daughter. She's just like you. Why?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why are so you desperate to join Neberdine?"

[zombiegurllll-blog]

No title part one.

I wrote this fan fiction a few months ago. I'm still working on it, it's definitely a work in progress! Leave me any kind of feedback on here, facebook, or if you have my number text me! 

Year 2019

(Castiel appears to be sitting in a park on a bench. Watching people pass by, It's lightly snowing. Children are playing, screaming.) 

  This, this story begins in a weird place. I told Dean and Sam this is the worst idea they've had so far. I even went to heaven to ask God and the Darkness if we should do this. I needed guidance, we all do. After...after the boy's mom came back from heaven things slowly started to fall apart. Soon after we found out Slayers still exist. The boys were not aware of their existence, I myself, thought they all died out. Once Buffy had awoken all of the last existing slayers to help in the good fight, we in heaven were under the impression they all died off in the apocalypse. I had no idea they fled to Italy. They have a small commune, not many of them are left; it's quite fascinating in a way.  As far as I know Buffy is still the head slayer, from the information I gathered from God, she's tough. Buffy died saving the world twice. She's the real reason Dean and Sam are alive. If it weren't for her and her fearless friends this world would have ended before the Darkness tried to end it. It would have been taken over by a vampire they called ¨the master¨. This woman is an important play in this. We need her to help save the world one last time. Right now the boys are trying to find crowley. He is the only one whom can contact her and not die. Whoever this Buffy girl is she has a very powerful witch on her side. This witch goes by the name of Willow. I've heard many of stories about Willow, she almost ended the world once. As far as any of us know she's the most powerful witch in existence. I am positive they will help, if not, I don't know where we stand without them. 

Italy 

Buffy - I haven't seen Willow in a few days. She went out into the woods and poof! After Willow came back from witchy rehab it hasn't been the same. I know she still feels guilty for turning Dawnie into a huge horse thingy. But obviously Dawnie is over it. Her and Xander are...a...¨thing¨..ew...gives me the creepy, crawly, wiggins. Dawnie isn't even a giant anymore, Angel! Willow turned her back to norm. Maybe she still kicks herself in the butt for it. Im worried. 

Angel - Buff, I'm sure she will turn up, she always does. Hell maybe she's on her  way here OR did you ever stop to think maybe she's looking for Oz? It-

Buffy - Wait, WHAT!? Do you and Spike know where she's at!? It sure sounds like you do Mr. cryptic! 

Willow (in the background) - Don't tell her I'm here Buffy can't know!  Angel, we have to find these Sam and Dean guys before they find her! It's too important. 

Angel - Buff, Spike and I will find her. When we have more intel we will call. When have we ever let you down? We've always had your back. 

Buffy - OH? When you left town to move to L.A.? WHEN SPIKE TRIED TO MURDER ME? 

Angel - Buffy...stop. I promise you we will find her. I have to go. You, Xander and Dawn will be fine. I'll call you when and if I find Oz and Willow. Then we can go from there. 

Buffy -

Okay, we'll try our best here. Hopefully we get this done, I really dont want Giles or Faith knowing. They have enough on their plate the way it is. If they check in with you please play stupid. 

Angel - Okay Buff, I'll talk to you soon. Bye. 

Willow - Do you think she knows you're lying? Are we going to tell Spike yet? We need to find Oz A.S.A.P. He wasn't at the commune helping rebuild. His wife hasn't talked or heard from him in weeks. I'm worried Angel. 

Somewhere, L.A. 

Dean - I just don't get why Cass thinks some super human girl is going to save us. Also, WHY do we have wolf-boy wonder here tied up? Isn't he some good-vibes, yoga, fruitarian weirdo? I thought he could control his crap? 

Sam - Dean, he can. It doesn't help that he doesn't believe us. We're the only two living humans who met God personally, remember? Castiel did say and I quote ¨Dean. This is a bad idea.¨ then i'm positive he called you an ass-butt? 

Dean (scowling, looking over at Sam) 

Sam - I'm just saying dude. Now that we have wolf-man, we need to find crowley. 

Dean - Yeah, well just remember asking Crowley is YOUR idea, NOT Cass s! 

Oz - You guys fight more than Buffy and Spike. Are you sure you re brothers and not together? 

Dean & Sam - SHUT UP!

Back in L.A. 

Willow - I did have an ¨odd¨ dream last night. It was way too real. Maybe we can figure this out somehow? It might be the reason why my mojo is wonky. 

- out of nowhere crowley appears - 

Crowley - Well, hello boys and girls. We need to have a little chat, yeah?

- Willow and Angel both jump to their feet in shock. -

Angel - Willow, get behind me. Who the hell are you?

Crowley - Names Crowley, king of hell. Moose and my ex bestie are on their way here with their new pet dog. They need your help. 

Willow - Someone kidnapped Oz?! There better be a good reason for this, Mr. King of hell. OOoooooh. 

Crowley - Oh love, calm down, little miss red riding hood. We all need each other right now. This is very serious stuff. 

- Angel steps forward - 

Angel - So is this. 

- Angel goes into full vamp mode - 

- Crowley rolls his eyes. Moves his hand, Angel hits a wall - 

Crowley - HELLO, KING OF HELL OVER HERE. I'm a bloody demon! A little vampire isn't going to intimidate me, Angelus. 

- Angel looks up with a confused look - 

Crowley - Ah, yes...I know all about you. Just like I know about miss red riding hood witch of the century over here. You would have given mother a run for her money. We should have recruited you when we needed to put lucy back in his cage. 

- Angel and Willow look at one another in confusion - 

Angel - Lucy?

Crowley - Lucifer. Hes currently trapped in a cage that we put him in. You really need to brush up on your history, seriously.

Angel - So, you're telling me every apocalypse we've all been fighting the good fight but on different grounds? You? A demon? 

Crowley - Ah. About that I - 

Willow - I know all about Sam and Dean. They wer - 

Crowley - Moose and his mini me are the least of everyone's worries. 

Angel - I need to call Buffy.

Crowley & Willow - NO! 

Crowley - You big softy. Let's go running to miss teen U.S.A. everytime we're in a jam. You're off your rocker. 

Willow - I agree with this guy. Buff is kind of ask questions later nowadays Angel. 

Crowley - So are moose and his side kick. Cass needs to meet all of you, then her. 

Willow & Angel - Cass??

Downtown, L.A.

Dean - So this Angel guy. Who is he?

Oz - Not someone you want to mess with. Also, he's a vampire. About...a thousand years old by now, or older. 

Dean - A thousand years old or not I'm still watching my back. You can't expect me to trust the other one either. Blood suckers. 

Sam - Dean, dude, cmon. You need to grow up. 

Dean - I'm just saying! We cant trust everyone, and you out of all people should know that!

Sam - We'll be fine. We still have God on our side. 

Oz (scoffs) - YOU know God?

Sam & Dean - Yeah, he used to live with us. 

Oz (smirks, bobs his head & looks at both boys) - Cool. 

Italy 

Xander - Any word about Will?

- Xander paces. Dawnie has her arms crossed, pouting. - 

Buffy - I know Angel is lying. He knows where Will is. Maybe they're trying to find Oz, or...EW. Stop it, disgusting. 

Dawn - Buffy, you're acting completely nuts. What's your deal? OOOOO, still in love with Angel? 

- Buffy snaps her head over to Dawn - 

Buffy - DAWN. SHUT IT. 

Xander - WHAT HAPPENED?!?!

- Phone rings in the background. Xander answers in a panic -

Xander - Hello? Angel?! Did you find Will?

Willow - More like I found him. 

Xander - Willow! What happened to you? Why did you leave?!

Willow - I can explain all of that later. I found out Oz is missing, well, kind of. Its a really long story. You, Dawn and Buffy need to come to L.A. Get on the next plane out here, its important. 

Xander - Could you atleast tell me whats going on? You're being just like Mr. cryptic over there. 

- Angel in the background, scowling - 

Angel - I heard that, Xander. 

Willow - Xander, I - 

Xander - I get it. We ll see you soon Will. 

Buffy - So? What did Will say?? 

Xander - Shes with Angel, you were right. We need to go now, all three of us.

Back on the road  

- Phone rings -

Dean (rolling his eyes) - It's crowley. Im guessing it went well and no one died. 

Oz - Huh. That's surprising. I thought Angel would have tried to kill him. Whata softy. 

Sam - Crowley is the king of hell. It would be hard for anyone to actually kill him. To kill demons like Crowley you have to burn their bones. Otherwise he'll just come back. (sam sighs) 

Oz - Huh, brutal! 

Dean - So, how did you become wolverine anyways, kid?

Oz - Kid? I'm older than the other of you. While you were getting your diapers changed we were saving the world. 

- Sam scoffs while Dean chuckles and grips the wheel tighter - 

Oz - Ah, nothing to say Scoffs and Chuckles?

Dean - LISTEN, WE - 

Cass appears 

Cass - DEAN, that's quite enough. 

- Everyone in the car jumps - 

Dean - CASS! I thought we talked about this?

Cass - Dean, this isn't the time. We need to find the slayer. 

Oz - I don't know how Buff is going to handle all of this guys. Im pretty positive she's going to try to kill you. 

Dean - Well miss america is going to have to get used to it. 

Sam (rolls his eyes) - Dean, stop dude. 

Dean - Just saying! We all have this ¨mission¨ to uphold. Blondie better be on board or I'll chop her friggin head off! 

Cass - You will do no such thing. God and the Darkness are watching very closely. 

Oz - Guys, stop fighting, save it for later. Trust me you'll need all the energy you can get. Anyways, there's angels motel. We re here. 

- Angel looks out the window. -

Angel (in a sullen voice) - They're here Will. 

- Willow looks up at angel in shock while Spike enters the room. He leans against the doorway with his leg crossed behind the other, arms folded, smirking - 

Spike (smirking) - Hey, red. 

-Angel & Crowley both turn to see spike in the doorway. They roll their eyes-

Angel (scoffs) - Where the hell have you been? I thought for a second you were gone for good. 

Spike - Sorry to burst your bubble, Angelus. 

Crowley - Who the hell is the blondie boy band douche? 

- Angel scoffs while holding the bridge of his nose. As he's shaking his head at Crowley Angel is pacing. - 

Spike ( in an angrily raised voice) - Does this british twat know who we are?

Crowley (rolling his eyes) - Great...here we go again. 

Somewhere flying over L.A. 

Xander - Buff, I hope you have a plan. Do we even know what we're walking into? 

Buffy - Kick ass, ask questions later. 

(Buffy winks & head nods)

- Willow returns to her seat, looking around nervously. Buffy and Xander look around confused - 

Buffy & Xander - Will!? What're you doing here? Wheres Dawn?

Willow (in a calm sullen voice) - I zapped her back home, it's too dangerous. Someone is watching us. All I know is it's a demon. Not the cuddly kind either. 

- Buffy starts to dig through her bag. As she digs a man puts his hand on her shoulder. - 

Lucifer - Oh darling, those wont work. (He smiles & winks at Buffy)

- As the scooby gang looks around they notice time is at a stand still - 

Buffy (in a stern/angry voice) - I would remove those paws before I do it for you.

Lucifer - Ha! What anger you hold, little one. So I take it Im early to the party. 

Willow (looking ahead) - I...know who you are. 

Lucifer (putting his hand on his face while his arms are crossed) - Oh really? And who's that m´dear?  

Willow (still looking forward as her eyes turn pitch black) - You're being pretty cocky for a demon. 

Lucifer (scoffs & chuckles) - Ah, so you haven't met Samantha & little Dean berry yet I take it. 

Willow, Xander and Buffy (look at one another puzzled) - Who?

Lucifer - Well, well, well. Interesting, this should be fun. (smiles and chuckles to himself)

Back at Angel Inc. 

The boys, Oz and Cass have been on the road for countless hours/miles. They find themselves frustrated. As they finally arrive to the motel emotions are at a all time high. 

Dean - Okay, so let me get this straight...Spike and this angel guy are actually vamps? Cordelia is basically a floating guardian spirit, Buffy is the head slayer, Willow is super witch, Dawn was the ¨key¨ given to Buffy to protect for the rest of her life, you're a wolf-boy wonder and out of all of this Xander is the only human other than Buffy's old watcher Giles, which is nowhere to be found? 

Oz - Well, yeah. In a nutshell. 

Dean (rolls his eyes, scoffs) - GREAT. Every single last thing we're against NEEDS OUR FRIGGIN HELP. I didn't sign up for this Sammy. 

- As they enter the hotel loud noises/voices and the sound of things breaking get louder - 

Spike (screaming & punching angel) - WHERE IS BLONDIE? WHAT DID YOU AND RED DO?!

- Angel gets up, collects himself - 

Angel - Spike, I told you - 

- Spike punches angel in the face again - 

Spike - Wrong answer, angelus. 

- Crowley rolls his eyes and quickly realizes Willow vanished -

Crowley - Hey! knock it off! Have you lost your bloody minds?! We re at war! Also, has no one noticed that red riding hood is gone?!

- Sam and Dean break the front doors open - 

Dean - HONEY, WE'RE HOME! 

Crowley - Ha, I was wondering when those two block heads would show up. 

- No one in sight. The hotel is empty, silent and warm looking - 

Dean & Sam - Wow...

- Oz pushes ahead into the hotel - 

Oz - Not every vampire lives like an animal. Or what? You've never been in such a nice place? Ha. ANGEL! Its me, Oz! I brought - 

- Angel walks down the stairs -

Angel - Company, I see. Hello Oz. 

- Cass appears behind angel, he puts his hand on angels shoulder - 

Cass - Hello, Angelus. We need to talk. 

- Angel and Spike both look at Castiel in disbelief as crowley appears as well - 

Crowley - Ah, yes, my little blood suckers, you're not the only angel in the room, Angel. 

Spike - Why have we never met before? Who the hell are all of these blokes? Does this have to do with Buffy? 

- From the garden - 

Lucifer - Oh this has a lot to do with more than just her. 

Crowley -  Oh bollocks.

- Crowley fades out. Sam & Dean shift around. Dead looks over his shoulder - 

Dean - So, daddy let you out?

-Lucifer scoffs. He starts to shake his head - 

Lucifer - Dean, dean, dean...how good of you to bring my favorite chew toy, again. 

-Lucifer steps out of the darkness - 

Lucifer (with his arms up & open) - SAMMY! How bout it? Let's be a team again!

Dean - NOT A CHANCE, LUCY.

Lucifer - Oh Dean, where's the fun in that?

Cass - Lucifer! Brother, leave them alone. 

- Lucifer send Dean & Sam flying across the room. He starts to back away from cass- 

Lucifer - Now Castiel, lets talk about this. Don't do anything rash.

- Cass pulls out his Angel sword. Spike & Angel both are baffled, they start to back up & instantly shift into vampire mode - 

Spike - I think this one is on them mate. We need to stay out of it. 

Angel - Agreed. 

Lucifer (over hearing S&A) - OH! So no one wants to help their old pal out, huh? FINE, have it your way. 

- Lucifer turns to Sam & Dean - 

Lucifer - See you boys soon. (winks & fades out as Cass lunges at him.)

- Cass collects himself. Everyone looks around at one another - 

Dean - I - 

Cass - DEAN. Shut it...this isn't the time. 

Spike - So, What the bloody hell was that!?

- Buffy, Willow and Xander arrive, Cordelia & Doyle both appear in the background - 

Cordelia - So, hi everyone. We can explain. 

- Buffy, Angel, Spike, Willow, Xander & Oz look baffled - 

Dean, Cass, & Sam - Who the hell?

- Cordie & Doyle are standing side by side, hand in hand. Doyle bows his head -

Doyle - Ladies & gentleman. 

Angel (with tears in his eyes) - Cordelia?

- Cordie runs over, wraps her arms around Angel. then kisses him - 

Cordelia - Oh Angel...Ive missed you so much. 

- Buffy scowling in the background with her face red - 

Buffy - SO. THIS is what you've been up to? Great choice. HA.

Cordelia - Buffy, seriously? All of you are what? In your forties now? Angel doesn't love you like that anymore, this isn't high school. 

- Buffy scowls even more, folding her arms - 

Buffy - I might be getting older but ill still kick your ass, CORDIE. Don't tempt me. 

Dean - Whoa, whoa, ladies. We have bigger fish to fry. You can fight over Edward cullen later. 

- Dean laughs to himself, looks at Sammy & gives him a thumbs up - 

Sam - Dean, stop. 

Cass - Dean, Sam is right. Now that we're all here - 

Cordelia - Castiel, right? Angel of the lord?

Cass - Whos asking?

Cordelia - Other than what just happened you're the real reason Doyle and I are even here. We all need one another right now. I believe Lucifer wants our powers. Everyone in this room, even you Xander, are important in this fight. We need everyone and - 

Doyle - Hey, wait. Where's that Crowley bloke? We can't do this without him, mates. 

Cass - I'll go find Crowley. He's still terrified of Lucifer. All of you need to talk this out and get along. God and the Darkness are depending on us. 

The scooby gang - GOD?

Dean & Sam - He's real. And real pissed. 

Buffy - How can we believe you? How do you know God?

Oz - Buff, these guys know a lot. They're hunters, born & raised. God lived with them. It's a long, rad, but long, story. Theyll tell you all about it.