#also apparently to like cowboy romance you must like cowboys

[sscrambledmeggss]

toxic character trait is that i have to be a correct hater. if i am a hater i’m not just going to blindly hate something. i will read/watch/listen to something i know i’ll most likely dislike because i need to *truly know* if i dislike it or not (i cannot listen to a song i decide i dislike too many times, because i might brainwash myself into liking it).

like colleen hoover novels?? not my cup of tea, i still read three of them just to make sure, because i don’t know want to just blindly dislike something i *think* i’ll dislike. i have to have a solid case, it’s like i’m preparing for court, but it’s actually just stating my opinions online. like what if i actually like it, what if i was just letting myself think because it’s not something i’d usually like, i’d dislike it? what if i’m just holding myself back from enjoying something because others dislike said popular thing? etc. people like them for a reason, and it is nice to try to find the reasons they do. like if i’m going to be a hater, i need to be certain that i *am* a hater. if this makes sense.

[wannab-urs]

Outtakes - Non-smut Vol 1

AO3 | Kofi | Main Masterlist | The Spreadsheet Masterlist | Vol 2

Hi friends! Sometimes we want fics that are SFW or we just want to make ourselves sad or we need a little pick me up. I'm here with a list of fics that have no (explicit) smut as of posting! They may have smutty thoughts or mild allusions to smut, but those are marked in the warnings!

I know, me, posting non-smut fics.... but they deserve love too! Note that while many of these are rated T, they are posted on blogs that are 18+ so MDNI <3

Summaries and tags are, in most cases, provided by the author - please be sure to read them as some of these fics may have content you do not wish to read.

Updated 5/24/2024

Whiskey, Dark and Deep - Jack - @prolix-yuy

Summary: In the short time you’ve known Jack Daniels, he’s disappointed you three times. Warnings: M, violence, blood, injuries, gunfights, so so so much yearning, full on cowboy tropes.

A bearable weight - Javi G - prolix-yuy

Summary: New Years Eve is the holiday of new beginnings, and you take a leap to see if Javi might be one of them. Story Warnings: T, plenty of sweetness, more ridiculousness because I can’t help myself, some lightly spicy kisses.

One Hundred and Fifty Seven - Din - @theidiotwhowritesthings

Summary: Din fakes his death for some reason. They leave reader behind thinking he’s dead. Months go by and he returns but reader is like super not okay. Say she’s been super into spice because then she can see Din when she’s high. Anyway, happy ending but loooots of angst please! Also, can it be a bit between him returning and reader being okay with him being back?” Warnings: angst with happy end, drug use, drug addiction, mentions of death, brief canon violence, self loathing, anxiety, self doubt, boba adopts reader b/c i couldn’t resist

In an instant - Joel - @mishasminion360

Summary: Happy Birthday, Joel Miller... Warnings: Um…..😳🙄 (ed. note: I hate to spoil the story, but since this list is intented to help people avoid triggers, I must; Major Character Death (reader), angst, loss of pregnancy)

It would be - Din - @fuckyeahdindjarin

Summary (aka prompt I gave myself): ‘It would be easier if you just married him.’ Warnings: angst, jealousy, fighting, pining, yearning, no use of Y/N

Just Keep Breathing - Javi P - @swiftispunk

Summary: javi finds it harder and harder to keep up with the more physical aspects of his job. reader offers him some love and words of comfort. warnings etc: BODY REPRESENTATION <3 (reader is described as having thicker thighs, a belly, and crow’s feet), smoking + smoking related health issues, hurt/comfort, back massages, fluff, angst, bein in ur 30s/40s, established relationship. probably bad spanish (please correct me). NO USE OF Y/N.

Every Pilot Needs a Wingman - Frankie - @kikis-writing-world

Summary: You have been pining quietly over your neighbor for months. He hasn’t noticed, but apparently his friend has… Warnings: Smutty thoughts - grey sweatpants should be their own warning. Fleeting mentions of masturbation and sex toys. Swearing. Santi gives the reader tips on how to impress/pick up Frankie, I don’t know if that might come off as shady or triggering to people so I want to mention that.

A girl walks into a bookshop - Ezra - @oonajaeadira

Summary: Set a couple of years after the events of the film. Ezra owns a bookshop. You walk in. Warnings: The coziest, softest romance. They do work up to intimacy, but it is sequestered in it’s own chapter–the “Interlude”–which can be skipped without losing any of the story. 

Breathe Through It - Joel - @tommysversion

Summary: you have a panic attack. Joel helps. Warnings: Descriptions of mental health conditions (namely PTSD, but can be read as any anxiety based disorder with panic attacks) / graphic description of a panic attack / some adult language/ references to past trauma (nothing explicitly described but inferred).

A kiss before dying and in death we combine - Joel - oonajaeadira

Summary: When Joel becomes infected, you make the decision not to leave him alone. Warnings: Blood and wounds. Bodily character death. Loss. Love that hurts. Sex of course, but blurred to the edges. Playing fast and loose with the cordyceps and how fast it grows.

102 - Frankie - @tieronecrush

summary: every week, you and frankie meet up at the same spot at the same time to catch-up and share a coffee. you’ve been his best friend for years. through thick and thin, always there. thing is, frankie’s been in love with you for nearly as long as he’s known you and hasn’t worked up the courage to tell you. warnings: no use of Y/N, post-film timeline, au where frankie doesn’t have a kid, use of pet names (solecita, mi mejor), high school level spanish (mostly swear words), unrequited love, self deprecation, alcohol use/drunkenness, smoking

Safe in my arms - Ezra - mishasminion360

Summary: Ezra harbors a secret hatred for his absent arm, but his feelings come to a head when his newly acquired handicap fails to do the one task he vowed never to fail in: keep you safe from harm. Warnings: Language; light angst; feelings of insecurity; body dysmorphia; brief allusions to smut; hurt/comfort; fluff.

Leave Off Your Wandering - Joel - oonajaeadira

Summary: An area native, long-term resident and shepherd in Jackson, you prefer quiet and isolation and the company of sheep. It seems this new resident Joel Miller and his young ward might share your interests. Warnings: M (possible canon violence and language. most likely non-explicit sex further down the line.) (ed. note; no smut as of chapter 2)

Peace - Joel - swiftispunk

summary: jackson era, post-tlou. you and joel discuss what it means to die. warnings: angst and fluff, discussions of death and dying, discussions of sex but nothing too explicit, age difference implied but not specified (joel is older than you but the number of years is not relevant), established relationship. NO USE OF Y/N.

This is me trying - Joel/Ellie platonic!! - swiftispunk

summary: jackson. a flashback on a film reel sparks a memory. joel tells ellie how it feels. warnings: angst, discussions of child loss, discussions of grief and death, ig fluff

Epiphany - Joel - @jksprincess10

Summary: Your new neighbor is a war veteran with a lot of scars. (1k words) Warnings: AU where Joel is in the military, age gap, PTSD, anxiety, insomnia, allusions to smut, suicidal thoughts, sad ending. Beware!! 

Significant - Din - softlyspector

Summary: Din has been calling you riduur for months. You finally find out what it means, and get a little more than you bargained for. Warnings: pining, absolute FOOLS in love, bit of grumpy x sunshine, lil angsty, possibly incorrect lore, fluff, lots of Mando'a (translations for the Mando'a at the end

A pile of cards - Javi P - @undercoverpena

summary: it’s become a tradition. he presents you with a birthday card so you can collect his words, while he collects the expressions you share as you read them. warnings: javi through the seasons, narcos season two/three spoilers. cute, fluff. happy ending.

Fire - Din - jksprincess10

Summary: None Warnings: fluff fluff fluff, mutual pining, idiots in love, this is pretty short, mando still has the crest, canon divergent.

Honeyed - Joel - softlyspector

Summary: You hate being touched, but you might be willing to put aside your discomfort for a tattoo from Joel. Warnings: slow build, no outbreak tattoo!au, reader has issues with touch and is mostly touch adverse, tattoos and getting tattooed (the reader only has one tattoo that is described in any detail), description of a past abusive relationship and a bad experience getting tattooed, insecurity, anxiety, loneliness, implied undefined past trauma with men, Joel gets to have both his daughters in this, you can decide if this is game joel or show joel

The Art of Healing - Marcus Pike - @northernbluess

Summary: Marcus Pike was feeling lost—unfulfilled and unmoored. After a failed marriage, heartbreak courtesy of his ex-fiancée and relocating to D.C., Marcus knew that he needed more than the FBI. Seven years later, Marcus has traded in Special Agent for Doctor and is now a clinical psychologist specialising in art therapy. He combines his two loves of art and psychology, spurred on by his experience in art crimes, FBI psych courses and his own time in therapy. Josephine is referred to Dr Pike, having just been discharged from treatment for an eating disorder. While Dr Pike is fresh to his new career, he is knowledgeable, warm, kind and attentive. Over time, as she bares her soul to him, he falls for her and the bond between them ties both their heads in knots. As her therapist he knows it’s wrong but he begins to feel incapable of separating his feelings from his work. Before long neither can truly live without the other — if only she knew that. Warnings: (warnings will be specified in each individual chapter, however, please read these carefully) Art Therapist!Marcus Pike, eating disorder, therapy, mentions of disordered eating patterns, hurt/comfort, slow burn, lots of pining and tension, angst, age gap, strained familial relationships, so much softness and feelings, eventual smut (ed. note: no smut as of chapter 5 and worth the read up to that point)

The Man That I Love - Joel - @lumoverheaven

Summary: None (ed. note: Joel is an idiot who doesn't know what he has until he almost loses it). Warnings: None (ed. note: angst)

Not Strong Enough - Joel - @beskarandblasters

Summary: Fem!Reader and Joel are in an established relationship, having met shortly after the events in Kansas City. They’re living in Jackson, Wyoming together, post Salt Lake City with Ellie. Things are going well until an incident happens during patrol and Joel questions whether or not he’s good enough. Written in third person. Warnings: angst, feeling inadequate, canon types of violence, swearing, bar fight, Joel is an asshole :/

Do You Love Me - Dieter - me

Summary: here is a fluffy (by my standards) little drabble in the A Ghost of You universe. Can be read standalone Warnings: There's just some kissing and no mentions of anything bad because I'd never do anything bad to D, would I?

Thunder Buddies - Joel - me

Summary: Joel comforting reader who is scared of thunderstorms Warnings: descriptions of a panic attack, Joel being adorable, cuddling, cuteness, a distinct lack of angst or smut - which is really weird coming from me.

Wash Day - Marcus P - @secretelephanttattoo

Summary: Some completely self-indulgent romantic fluff about Marcus Pike washing your hair. Warnings: none

Personal Best - Marcus P - secretelephanttattoo

Summary: This picture of Pedro holding a dog inspired me to write a fluffy meet-cute for Marcus Pike & Reader. I'm feeling 90s romantic comedy vibes, I don't know if I'll write anything more on this but we'll see if people like it. Warnings: none

Context and Perspective - Marcus M - @elvenmother

Summary: The newest member of the Heroics has gone missing and as one of the better-known Villains on the scene, you are blamed. Then your sidekick goes missing. You must go after the Heroic’s leader to try to get them back and clear your name. Warnings: Swearing, mentions of injuries, mentions of blood

A Very Furby Christmas - Joel - @proxima-writes

Summary: it’s christmas eve 1998 and joel miller thinks everything is perfect. well, until his brother admits he didn’t get sarah the one present she wanted - the furby. now, joel has to go out on christmas eve to find the year’s hottest toy that’s been sold out for months. turns out, you’re on the same mission. and you’ve both found the last furby in town. Warnings: pre-outbreak, no use of y/n, holiday/christmas fic, the last toy trope, no smut, age gap - not explicitly specified but joel is 31 and reader is mid-20s, the great miller gingerbread construction competition, operation get sarah miller a furby, some kissing.

The Haunting of Dieter Bravo - Dieter - @idolatrybarbie Summary: "ghosts aren't real, except when they are." Warnings: referenced substance abuse, mentions of alcohol, dieter is sober, one song-based joke (please get it plsplspls), reader is gender neutral, a good ol' haunting tale.

The Locksmith - The Thief - oonajaeadira

Summary: A Thief you’ve known for years and have conflicting feelings for brings you a gift. The gift is a not only a puzzle in itself, but part of a larger mystery, one only you can crack. Warnings: reader is an adult, reader is AFAB, no physical descriptions of reader

A Piece of Cake - Frankie - idolatrybarbie

Summary: It's been a long time since you've seen Frankie Morales. Warnings: Angst, discussion of addiction, mentions of cocaine, alcohol consumption, bowling

The Parents That Are Left - Joel - @frenchiereading

Summary: There weren't many patrol partners Joel Miller tolerated: his brother and Iris. On a cold January day, Joel pays her mother a visit and finds out you can bond over anything. Unfortunately. Warnings: canon-typical violence and language, heavy angst, talks/mentions/descriptions of death and dead bodies, heavy discussions/thoughts of feelings/grief/guilt, suicidal thoughts, alcohol consumption, Jackson-era Joel, no reader, no y/n, OFC, not a single ounce of romance

For the Love of Horror - Dieter - @coulsons-fullmetal-cellist

Summary: Dieter and you watch a scary movie. Warnings: No use of y/n, horror movies, euphemisms, fluff, suggestive language

Stages of Grief - Joel - @bonezone44

Summary: After a tense interaction with a family member who raised you when you were little, you spiral. Joel talks you through it. Warnings: Gender neutral reader, familial trauma, angst, grief, neglect, trauma, childhood emotional/physical abuse

The Riding Lesson - Jack - @bluestar22x

Summary: When you are hired at a ranch as a trail guide, the owner asks the foreman to teach you how to ride Western style. Warnings: Suggestive thoughts, sexual tension, equestrian terms

Frankie and Din - Frankie/Din - @avastrasposts

Summary: a one-shot with our favourite pilot, sweet Frankie and our favourite space boy, broody Din based on the line; "Go on then, space boy, fly this.” Warnings: none

Light Only Shows You Where the Shadow Are - Max Phillips - oonajaeadira

Summary: The only thing that can get rid of a minor jerk is a major jerk. Warnings: Non-consensual attention (not Max), stalker behavior (when there’s trouble, Max always seems to be watching from nearby), vampire violence.

It's always been you - Dieter - @alwaysmicado

Summary: After a year of dating Dieter Bravo, you are forced to face reality. All good things must come to an end, right? Warnings: angst, age gap (unspecified), swearing, brief mention of p in v sex, brief mention of disordered eating and suicide, mention of black eye, toxic relationship, drug use, reader's coping mechanisms are unhealthy

John Wayne - Joel - @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin

Summary: twenty years after the world ended, you find yourself face to face with Tommy Miller. The brother of the man who was your boyfriend at the time of the outbreak. Warnings: talk of attempted suicide, child loss, grief, angst

illicit affairs - Joel @chaotic-mystery

Summary: it’s my take on what illicit affairs means. Every time I listened to it I imagined Joel, specifically dbf Joel. I hope the swifties go *easy* on me and pls don’t say anything if you didn’t like it. Warnings: angst. And more angst. Swearing, forbidden relationship, arguing, fwb, alluded age gap but not specified. Use of nicknames (kid, baby……don’t look at me ok I didn’t do IT), reader is not physically described, no use of y/n.

Stay Close to Me - Jack - @alwaysbethewest

Summary: You're a rookie agent sent to work undercover with Jack as a married couple!Fake/undercover marriage! Statesman casefic! Warnings: A little romance, kissing, coarse language, very mild peril and hurt/comfort, and a splash of alcohol. Reader is a junior agent and has some muscle but otherwise no physical/age descriptions. As with any good Kingsman fic, my first step was to disregard half of canon, so this is either pre-movie or an AU.

To Know the Light - Din - @burntheedges

Summary: to go in the dark with a light is to know the light. Warnings: fluff, a teensy bit of angst, introspection, winter, food mention, reader has no description, gn!reader

O, Christmas Tree - Dieter - @covetyou

Summary: As PA to Dieter Bravo, you were used to the strange, unusual and downright weird. What you weren't used to was taking in a shipment of - what? And how many? Warnings: sex toys (so many butt plugs), Dieter being a menace to his PA, no smut, pure silliness.

In Fiction - Dieter - @sin-djarin

Summary: Dieter comes to bed. Warnings: Established relationship, mentions of self doubt, no physical description of reader, no dialogue, no use of y/n.

The Serpent Under It - Dave York - @brandyllyn

Summary: Dave is very good at his job Warnings: Canon typical violence. kinda dark yo, soulmate AU

I'll Leave a Light On For You - Max Phillips - oonajaeadira

Summary: Max has reservations when it comes to love, and for very good reasons. Warnings: Angst. Character death. Allusions to the atrocities of war and its lasting effects. Max is a vampire. Traumatic soul memory. Me assuming I know anything about French culture of the 1930s.

Cocoon - Joel - secretelephanttattoo

Summary: A short ode to Joel's coat. / a bath with Joel Warnings: Angst and intimacy. 1 reference to blood and allusion to canon typical violence (nothing is described)

Home - Frankie - @dancingtotuyo

Summary: Frankie always comes home to you. Warnings: fluff, angst, girl dad!frankie, recovering!Frankie, references to drug use, references to violence, trauma, healing.

Negotiations - Max Phillips - prolix-yuy

Summary: Max Phillips never found marketing to be all that helpful. Hell, running an ad on Facebook was easy enough. But then you walked in the door and he knew he had to have you, in all the ways he could. Warnings: T, descriptions of male and female bodies, some fantasizing and suggestive themes.

sweets for my sweet; sweets from my sweet - Ezra - @tinytinymenace

Summary: you are a cook at an exploration camp and one of the miners asks you about Earth and brings you a treat Warnings: Brief mentions of planet death (RIP Earth) and strained family dynamics but on balance this is soft.

Caught Kissing Santa - Dave York - @wildemaven

Summary: Alice saw you kissing Santa Claus Warnings: reader is married to Dave and stepmom to his kids, mentions of food and drinks, non-religious Christmas celebrations and Santa beliefs, alluding to sexy time but no smut, kissing, mentions reader is wearing pajama pants, fluff, soft Dave, one use of ‘good girl’.

Unwind - Dieter - @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin

Summary: Dieter helps you unwind when you get your period after an already long day. Warnings: established relationship, reader menstruates, drug use (marijuana), reference to past drug use, reference to bad horror movies, Dieter being our favorite trash panda, sweet, fluff, domesticity

One Night - Marcus P - secretelephantattoo

Summary: You get one night with Marcus Pike. Warnings: Implied/referenced smut but nothing is explicitly described. Smoking and alcohol. Angst because they only have one night together. Marcus is a flirty menace. House party nostalgia. Heavy petting in a stairwell

Lovesick - Joel - prolix-yuy

Summary: You've been greedy for Joel for too long. Warnings: descriptions of wound care and blood, allusions to dubcon due to drinking and drug use, no actual smut

---------------------------------

Happy Reading!

[ramblingoak]

The Cardinal’s Bride, Chapter 1: Heading West

~ A Romantic Adventure in the Old West: After being forced into a marriage with Mr. Saltarian by your father you are sent west to his estate in Nevada.  Along the way you end up meeting one of the cowboys you have always fantasized about... ~

~~ Please visit The Outlaw Brides Masterpost for later chapters and to read more stories from this world ~~

Thank you to @tasty-ribz for the wanted poster!  For some more amazing fanart check out: @meowsaidmissy (1 / 2), @snail-shell2335  here, @vahvco here, @ghulehgwen here, @rabidghoul here, @nocterish here, @enjoy-my-swearing​ here, @blacktie-whitenoise (1 /2), @z-xmyers (1/2/3/4), @foxybouquet here, _simpera_ on instagram and valkyrieinpink on twitter.  Also a huge thank you to @kissingghouls for all her help and emotional support.

Cardinal Copia x Female Reader ~ slow burn romance, adventure, violence, nsfw, 18+ only mdni, 2k words ~

He could remember the heat of the flames against his skin…the shouting…the screaming. 

He could remember everyone scrambling to escape…crying for their friends and loved ones.

He could remember seeing people for the last time…not knowing if they died from a bullet or the fire.

He could remember his face…watching from the edge of town…smiling…proud of himself.

He remembered these things every day…they ate away at him like a disease.

But most of all he remembered how much he hated him.

And how good it would feel to get his revenge.

~~~  ~~~  ~~~  ~~~  ~~~  ~~~  ~~~

“You will marry Mr. Saltarian and that is the final word on the matter.”

Your father’s voice echoed in your head as you looked forlornly out the stagecoach window.  Miles and miles of dry land had passed you by.  No longer were you surrounded by the fertile fields of your home, Missouri was far away at this point.  You were getting closer and closer to your fate.  Closer and closer to a man you had never met but would soon be calling your husband.

The comments about “dear Mr. Saltarian" started a few months ago.  You heard about how wise and handsome he was.  How he had a large estate in Nevada that was beautiful, but needed a woman’s touch.  That his job as a bank owner afforded him every luxury one could imagine.

But mostly how Mr. Saltarian needed a wife and how it was going to be you.

You had chosen not to comment on any attempts your parents made to talk about the man.  There wasn’t a point anyway, you had been told for years now that they were looking for a good match for you.  You couldn’t live with your parents forever and you didn’t want to, but why couldn’t you find someone that you loved?  Why did it have to be this man, miles and miles away from the only home you had ever known?

According to the whispers you had overheard from your father’s butler and a few of the cooks it was because of money.  Apparently your father had gotten a loan years ago from Mr. Saltarian and had been unable to pay it off.  Now he either must sell his business and your home or find some other way to repay the man.

“Luckily for the boss his daughter is pretty and unwed, that’ll be payment enough won’t it?” 

You had turned and ran back down the corridor as their laughter echoed behind you.  Flinging herself into your mother’s arms you had begged her to talk your father out of it.  Begged her to let you stay and find someone you loved to marry and let you have a chance at being happy.  She had remained stiff and quiet in your arms for a few moments until you finally had stopped sobbing, little hiccups escaping you as you tried to control yourself.

“My daughter, most women do not have the luxury to choose who they marry.  You will learn to love Mr. Saltarian just like I learned to love your father.”  Your eyes searched her face, looking for any sign of remorse for what she was doing to you but it remained impassive and blank.

You had finally resigned yourself to your fate, to be unhappy and basically sold to a man you barely knew.  He hadn’t even come with the associates and stagecoach he had sent for you.  There were six men in total, two drivers and four others that looked more like thugs than bank employees.  You watched as they had loaded the few trunks of belongings you were allowed to bring.  They were dressed all in black and remained quiet throughout their preparations.  

When a few of them started to check their weapons over before you all left you couldn’t help but look scared.  You’d never seen so many guns in your life, the only gun you’d ever seen up close was a small revolver your father owned.  These men had revolvers at their hips and rifles in their hands.  One of them noticed your wide eyed stare and chuckled. “You’ll be thankful we have these if we run into any bandits on the road.” 

The man that seemed to be in charge walked over to your father and mother and started speaking to them in a low voice.  You didn’t hear everything he said but he mentioned having to watch for a particular group of bandits on the way to Nevada.  He mentioned that Mr. Saltarian was worried about the stagecoach being attacked and you possibly being kidnapped.  What have your parents gotten you involved with?

Even though you were scared you couldn’t help a small thrill from racing through you at the mention of bandits and even the possibility of being kidnapped.  As a refined, sophisticated young woman you were supposed to show interest in delicate activities such as knitting, embroidery or just sitting quietly and looking pretty.  But you had always loved stories of the lawless west.  Tales of cowboys and bandits filled your head when you sat prim and proper in church.  When you laid in bed at night you often imagined what it would be like running into a ruggedly handsome gunslinger.

You especially thought about this while you touched yourself.

As the guard spoke more it was apparent that there was one person in particular that Saltarian’s men were worried about: The Cardinal.  You had heard of him before, his exploits often made the newspaper headlines and you had seen his wanted poster in the window of a few local businesses.  There were usually a few of the other members of his gang nearby as well, the papers had taken to calling them Ghouls.  The sketches they made of the Ghouls were frightening, they looked almost demon-like with their faces hidden behind silver masks.

But the one of The Cardinal didn’t frighten you at all.  Even with many sketches showing him to have odd, discolored eyes.  A white eye that people speculated was given to him by the devil himself.  You weren’t ashamed to admit you thought him handsome.  He wore what looked like black kohl around his eyes, making them even more mesmerizing.  The posters showed other ways to identify him, he usually had a mustache and sideburns and he often wore a long dark red duster.

No one knew his real name, or that of any of his Ghouls.  The rumor was that he had grown up in a church (and a devil worshiping one at that) if you believed some of the gossip.  Some people said he was unhappy with his place in the church and had murdered most of the upper clergy.  Others said the nearby town had finally had enough of the evil church and burned it all down one night, with many of the members still inside.  Either way it was said The Cardinal was one of the few surviving members and that he rode through the western lands with his Ghouls committing evil acts in the name of Lucifer.

You shook your head and brushed your hands down the front of your traveling dress.  It was a dress your mother had made specifically for your trip.  She had chosen a fabric that was white and blue and to you completely impractical for traveling in the dusty west.  It had already gotten stained while you were able to stretch your legs during the short stops the guards had allowed.  You did like that it had pockets though and you snuck your hand into one to grip the folded piece of paper you had slipped in there.

While the dressmaker and your mother had been speaking you had drifted to the shop window and seen one of The Cardinal’s wanted posters.  You snuck a peak back at the two women and glanced briefly out to the street before pulling the poster off the window.  It seemed such a silly thing to do, but you figured if you were being forced to marry a boring bank owner like Mr. Saltarian you should allow yourself a small thrill.  Something to look at when lying alone in the dark in your new home.

Your daydreaming ended when you heard a commotion outside the stagecoach.  One of the two guards that sat across from you stuck their head out the window to speak with the drivers.  You saw the other two guards that were on horseback ride by quickly, the horses kicking dust up as they sped off.  The men had their guns out and the sunlight glinted off the metal.  Your heart started pounding in your chest, what was happening?

All at once both drivers started shouting and you could hear loud popping sounds out in the distance.  You rushed to look out the window but one of the guards shoved you back into your seat.  “Stay down!”  The man turned and looked out the window and you could easily see the fear on his face.  The popping sounds started again and were beginning to get closer.  One of the guards aimed their rifle out the window and started shooting.  You couldn’t help but yelp and throw your hands over your ears at the loud sound.

The stagecoach suddenly veered off to the left and the momentum flung you and the guards to the side.  You were able to grip the window while the guards ended up on the floor, their rifles falling from their hands.  You looked outside and your mouth fell open as you saw numerous figures on horseback in the distance, quickly gaining ground to the stagecoach.  You couldn’t tell how many there were through the dust in the air, but the guards with you were obviously outnumbered.  You didn’t even see the two that had been on horseback anymore.  

As the group got closer one rider broke away and quickly started gaining ground on you.  One of the drivers leaned out from his seat in the corner of your eye and you yelped when he started firing at the rider.  You watched as he leaned to the side and his horse quickly maneuvered out of the way.  He then pulled his own gun out and fired off a series of rounds towards where the drivers were sitting.

The man was focused on where he was shooting and didn’t seem to have noticed you, but you couldn’t take your eyes off of him.  He brought his horse closer to the side of the carriage and you saw the group of riders behind him split with half going around behind you and the other going closer to the front, getting closer and closer to the drivers.

Abruptly he turned his head and your mouth fell open at what you saw.  Two familiar mismatched eyes looked into your own.  The other features you saw were familiar to you as well, a mustache and sideburns.  Over his shoulders was a dusty dark red coat flapping in the air as he rode next to you.  You brought your eyes back to his and a sudden grin flashed over his face and he winked at you before pulling away and riding around the back with his other riders.

A hard grip on your arm shook you out of your trance and you were pulled back into the carriage as the guard reloaded his rifle.  The drivers were shouting again and you could just make out what they were saying over the commotion of hooves and gunfire.  It was something you didn’t need to hear though, you already knew who was out there.

“It’s The Cardinal!  He’s found us!”

Go to Chapter 2: La Principessa

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[hermesserpent-stuff]

Can we get a side story of kinda when peter and his high-school friends went ice skating only with Montana and the other enforcers with quinten there watching peter trying to fidger out the girl problem he has and watching peter try and flirt with them and Montana and dan give him some advice, teasing, and a little push maybe. And maybe the new sinister 6 show up only instead of mysterio fighting its doc ock and the enforcers and quinten have to cover for peters disappearance. Also angry cowboy.

Uhh so i dont do romance. And I dont really want to write giving girl advice cause thats not my cup of tea either. But!! I am fascinated with the idea of ice skating and having gwen interacting with all these nerds. And then dealing with some of the six showing up. Prompts tend to get bent a lot if they arnt loose due to my writing style. 

Peter scrunches his nose as they enter the ice skating facility. Montana had said something about going to hang out with Quentin and the Enforcers and had invited Harry and Peter to come with him. Gwen had overheard them making plans to go to the rink and Peter had invited her to come along. Montana and the other Enforcers had been only mildly surprised at the addition but were friendly enough. Peter shivers again, Montana’s jacket cutting the cold a bit. But he is still feeling the siren call of sleep at the edges of his mind. Montana seems to notice and drops another coat on him while they are lacing up their skates. 

“Ive roughed in some west virginia during the heigh of ski season with just a cotton shirt. Ill be fine for a few hours.”

Montana says before finishing his laces and going to look for Quentin who was supposed to have come before them. Gwen apparently had been skating multiple times before so she ends up helping Harry and Peter figure out how to walk over to the edge of the rink. Dan and Ox help them keep balance The trio pause as they catch sight of Quentin leaping, spinning, and then jumping into Montana’s arms in excitement at seeing the cowboy. Montana glides backwards and laughs a little before swinging Quentin around and putting him back down on the ice. They skate to the edge of the rink. 

“Greetings. Another friend of Peter’s?” 

Quentin offers a hand to Gwen who looks a little suspicious but shakes it.

“Uh, Gwen.”

“Quentin! Nice to meet you. You skated before?”

“Yep.”

“Figure, hockey, or just sliding around.”

“Hockey.”

She says squaring her shoulders.

“Fun. Different kind of skating than what Im going to try and teach Harry and Peter. But your welcome to learn with them!”

“Will we learn to spin?”

Harry asks, looking really interested.

“Oh, most definitely, but first you must learn how to move across the ice. Dan, you have more experience on ice than Montana, right? Will you be willing to be a third set of eyes?”

Dan nods even as Montana lets out a huff. Quentin touches the cowboy's arm.

“You know Im not trying to be mean. You were my first choice. We just have three instead of two. “

Montana gives a slight nod. Quentin lights up and then claps his gloved hands together.

“Alright! Time to get started. First! We learn to fall. Then we learn how to go forwards.”

Quentin spends some time showing them how to fall, get up, and move across the ice. Ox watches on from the sidelines. They then start on simple spirals, with one leg straight in the air as they glide forward. Each teen has an adult. Peter with Montana, Harry with Quentin, and Gwen with Dan. Harry laughs when he succeeds and then hits the wall. Quentin helps him rise and complements him.

When they move to spinning, Peter finds himself loving the feeling and being able to control the speed by moving one foot. It felt a little like flipping. After teaching the group a few other tricks, Quentin has them start free skating to practice whatever moves they want. Montana skates beside Peter and then speaks. 

“Want to try something cool?”

“Oh? Sure!”

“Keep your legs together and stiff. Hold your arms out like a T and fall back into me.”

Peter does so and Montana grabs his underarms and starts spinning. Peter lets out a loud giggle, enjoying the sensation. When they stop, he sees Quentin doing the same move with Harry. Gwen looks on a little suspiciously but Dan offers and she also accepts. Peter skates around a little more before stepping out to sit. Gwen soon joins him.

“So that's… your uncle Montana?”

Peter smiles. 

“Yep! He’s from my mom’s side. But honestly. I call all of them uncle. They’ve been really good to me.”

She bites her lip and looks out at the ice where Harry has gotten Quentin to show him another trick. 

“Peter… I'm pretty familiar with a lot of my dad’s cases. Hard to ignore stuff sometimes. And… Well, I'm just going to say it. I'm pretty sure your uncles are well-known criminals.”

Peter blinks. Ah, she seems less okay with this than Harry.

“I know.”

Gwen shoots him a slightly scandalized look and Peter ducks his head a little. 

“I mean. I know sort of. But they don't do anything while I'm with them and they don't hurt me.”

Gwen frowns and Peter suddenly feels a flash of defensiveness.

“You don't have to hang out with them if you dont like them.”

“Peter, that's not what I'm saying.”

“What are you saying? Are you asking me not to interact with family? Or are you saying you're going to call your dad on them for teaching us to ice skate?”

Peter rises, not wanting to deal with this conversation right now. 

“Peter, they are wanted men.”

“And? The world isn't black and white Gwen. If you have something to say spit it out.”

“I just don't think it's safe.”

“They are literally some of the safest people to hang out with in New York. Have fun or don't. I'm going to go hang out with my fun and loving uncles.”

Peter turns and gets back out on the ice, moving as quickly as he can. He shoves the conversation away from his thoughts and sucks in the cold air. Montana shoots him a concerned look but Peter waves him off. He moves over to Quentin who is twirling with one leg up in the air. The illusionist slowly comes to a stop and blinks.

“Hello!”

“Show me how to do that please.” Peter wants his mind off Gwen. Too much stress. Quentin starts showing him how to get his leg up while twirling. But then there is a loud crash and explosion. Oh. Yikes. Peter hisses as his face hits the ice. Quentin hunches over him, looking out at the now screaming civilians. Peter also peeks out. Montana and Dan are next to Harry, keeping him steady. Ox is next to Gwen holding up a bit of wall that had collapsed and keeping it off of her. Apparently, there is a bank next door and apparently, some of Peter’s villains had decided to break through the shared wall to escape the police. Peter pokes Quentin and whispers.

“I've got to change.”

Quentin rises from the ice and lifts Peter with him, making a beeline for the edge of the ice. They duck right behind the wall and Quentin helps Peter untie his boots.

“Run to the back room and change. I'll tell your friends you went out the back way that I'm about to lead them through.”

Peter nods in thanks and bolts to go change and hide the clothes. 

When he comes dashing back out, he sees Quentin guiding the group towards the back. Gwen is resisting. 

“What about Peter?”

“I got Peter to run out the back earlier. He’ll probably head to the nearest safe place. Now move, Rhino’s no fun when he’s working.”

Spider-man sails over their heads and lands a firm kick to Ock’s chest. It seems that Ock, Sandy, Rhino, Electro, and Vulture have come out to play. He absently notes that the Enforcers and his friends have made it out as he dodges and kicks. He slides onto the ice and uses some of the movements he had just learned to maintain his balance. It is a little harder to stick to the slick surface, but he manages. His enemies have a much harder time so he tries to keep them inside of the rink. He flips, slides, and fights, using his webs to sling across the surface of the ice and then swing into his enemies at a much higher velocity. He sails through the air and downs Vulture into Electro knocking them both out. He uses Rhino against Ock and manages to knock out Sandy with one of the new webs he had been developing. 

He dodges away now that the job is done and grabs his clothes to change. He finds his family and friends a few streets down and ducks down behind a nearby dumpster. He crawls out and Montana is the first to notice him.

“There you are, kid.”

“Hey. Sorry for running, but…”

“Nah, I told you to get to safety. You did good peter.”

Quentin shoots him a pleased smile and ruffles his hair.

“Guess we’ll have to skate some other time”

Dan says with a huff. Montana chuckles. 

“Yeah. I suppose that's true. Though I am a bit mad we had to cut it so short.”

Peter glances over at Gwen who looks like she has been building up the courage to do something. She touches Ox’s arm and looks up at him.

“Um. Thank you. For saving me from that wall.”

Ox puts a hand on her head gently and speaks.

“Fawn friend.”

Gwen gives the man a quizzical look and Montana speaks up.

“That means he was happy to do it. Wouldnt do for youngsters gettin’ hurt on our watch. Especially not Peter’s friends. So, hot chocolate?”

Quentin makes an excited noise and tugs on Montana’s arm. The two lead the way out. Peter falls in step with Gwen while Harry chats with Dan.

“Hey. I'm sorry I sort of blew up on you. But… My uncles are good men, just not necessarily law-abiding ones.”

“I think I understand a little better now. But I still worry Peter.”

“They won't hurt me.”

Not really. Peter believes this with every bit of his heart and soul. 

“I can believe that.”

[whateverthedragonswant]

Dean is bi-coded, you can’t change my mind

Not to blast this on main but you cannot convince me that Dean was not written as biromantic and/or bisexual. There were way too many things thrown at us in the story line, too many acting choices and editing choices made that can explain it away as hetero & a dudebro just being a dudebro. If anyone disagrees, then can you please explain to me:

Dean’s consistent romantic coded arguments with Cas & Sam seeing how strongly it affects Dean when he & Cas are not getting along, when Cas has left or is missing/incommunicado/in trouble, when Cas dies, & then Dean’s turnaround when Cas came back in season 13x06?

Dean’s widower-like grieving arc in season 13 when Cas died?

This look right here while Cas is burning:

Dean’s reaction to Aaron hitting on him & his disappointed reaction when he finds out Aaron was only covering his tracks?

The commentary between Ben Edlund & Phil Sgriccia on the episode Aaron hits on Dean, talking about that scene in the bar (while it makes for a comedic moment, why is it referred to as Jensen perfectly “playing down the middle”? And why the “potential for love in all places”?) 

The whole “don’t have relationship problems with people you aren’t in relationships with” (meant romantically) & yet every time we turn around, Dean is having relationship problems with Cas?

Men consistently hitting on Dean throughout the series (again, yeah, this can happen regularly but why does the show/the writing keep choosing to repeat it? It may have started out as a joke but it then became a recurring theme)

Dean’s “You two fight like brothers” to Jesse & Cesar & then his reaction when he finds out they’re actually husbands? Especially in contrast to Sam’s reaction when he hears the same thing (it’s been established that Dean is not homophobic, Jesse & Cesar aren’t hitting on him, so why the discomfort? why write it/direct it/act it/edit it that way?)

the current copies of the script of the episode where Charlie knows Dean has gone through a breakup recently & the production schedule labeling a “breakup” between Dean and Benny that are currently circulating around right now?

Dean pushing away a chicken statue in the chicken restaurant when the waitress is talking about sex in response to what Jack said? (I’m asking why they actively put this moment in when it had no bearing/context on the story/scene at hand)

Why the siren in season 4 who apparently shows itself as the perfect mate to their victims turning out to be a guy and not only that, but they bond over things before Dean gets poisoned? (yes, this was also meant to showcase the growing chasm between the brothers & they need to hash their issues out but they could have easily done that with a female-presenting siren, too, so why highlight what Dean is missing rather than Sam?)

Why Dean’s physical reaction to Cas cleaning up in season 8? (Jensen could have played that completely differently had he been told to, so why not only shoot it that way but also keep the shot in?)

Why Dean’s bond with Cas being contrasted with his bond with Amara, and not just to highlight good vs evil or light vs darkness? Why did they choose to place Amara in the same season that Cas is possessed by Lucifer (and not just for the story reasons they presented) & away from Dean most of the time?

Why the shot of Amara’s hand over Cas’ heart and then she is able to not only connect to Dean but also shows him the mirage of a bleeding and injured Cas?

Why the “summer romance” with Crowley when Dean was a demon & the minute he & Dean “break up”, a sad love song (“Hey There Lonely Girl”) is playing in the background while Crowley looks at a picture of he & Dean in cowboy hats on their phone? A moment we then see later paralleled with Cas & Dean in cowboy hats in 13x06, at which point someone must have taken a picture of Cas for him to use in 15x15 for the crossroads demon?

Why Dr. Sexy?

Why Belphagor!Jack mentioning Dean’s looks after watching a hetero couple walking down the sidewalk & then a possible gay couple walking down the opposite side?

“Why do you always want what you can’t have?” What is it that Dean wants that he can’t have, women in the show tend to throw themselves at him as if he’s rice and they’re the white, plus he’s shown as faithful (in season 6 when with Lisa) when he’s in a serious relationship so what is it again that he can’t have exactly? And why choose to have Pam say this line?

Why the episode with Lee in 15x07? (I know Lee was meant to contrast with Dean, showing how Dean’s road could have gone had he given up after Chuck and everything, but this is also after Sam & Eileen are getting chummy and Dean is happy for them but is in a “bad place”, his words in 15x08, due to Cas leaving & Chuck; plus, again, lighting - pink & purple)

Why Sam’s casual unaffected demeanor to MLM & the contrast we see in Dean in those situations? (again, Dean is confirmed not to be a homophobe & not all of these situations are where Dean is being hit on/asked out so why the reactions?)

Why the lighting (pink & purple) in Heaven/Naomi’s office that was never seen before or since, during the scene where Cas is beating Dean in 8x17 where an “I love you” had been originally been scripted for Dean to say (before they changed it)? Where Cas chooses Dean (& Sam) over Heaven? (yes, he made that choice, the Angel tablet gave him power to break the connection completely, but watch it again, he made the choice before touching the tablet, when he drops the angel blade; also, I’m not sure what order they shot those scenes in but if they shot the Heaven scene before the Dean & Cas scene, is it possible they didn’t change the “I love you” yet and that’s why the lighting is there? Though I think they would have changed it in post, but not unless they wanted it to be there? Something to think about)

I know that some people like to point out that Cas is actually an angel that is without any gender, in a male vessel, but take away the points relating to Cas and you still have others left (and I’m sure I forgot some). So again, not to blast on main, but unless someone can explain this in dudebro terms and make it convincing, Dean is bi.

There’s no way they didn’t throw that into the story intentionally. Maybe it didn’t start out that way, but by the last season, it had changed. There were too many things thrown in there, too many hints, to discount. 

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. 

[ljones41]

"The Deconstruction of Dr. Jack Shephard"

"THE DECONSTRUCTION OF DR. JACK SHEPHARD" I have a confession to make. I must be one of the few fans of the ABC series "LOST" (2004-2010) who did not dislike the series' lead character, Dr. Jack Shephard. Before anyone makes the assumption that he is a favorite character of mine, let me make one thing clear. He is not. But for some strange reason, I never disliked Jack.  I still do not.

Throughout most of the series’ run, many "LOST" fans had consistently ranted against Jack’s faults. Mind you, he was not the only flawed character in the series. In fact, most of the major characters seemed to possess some very serious flaws. Jack Shephard seemed to be one of very few characters that had drawn a considerable amount of ire from the fans. I do not know why he was been specifically targeted by these fans. But I cannot help but wonder if the combination of Jack’s role as the series' lead character and his flawed personality had set fans against him. Now, someone might claim that my last remark sounds ridiculous. As I had earlier pointed out, most of the major characters are also seriously flawed or have committed some serious crimes. Extremely flawed characters like John Locke, Jin Kwon, Michael Dawson, Kate Austen, Miles Strume, Ana-Lucia Cortez, Charlie Pace, Sayid Jarrah, James "Sawyer" Ford, Sun Kwon, Boone Carlyle, Mr. Eko, Juliet Burke and Shannon Rutherford. Hell, the list was practically endless. And yet, the only other character who had received as much criticism or hate as Jack was Ana-Lucia Cortez. Why? Well, I have my theories. Both Jack and Ana-Lucia had assumed leadership among the castaways at one time or the other, due to their personalities, circumstances and professions. Ana-Lucia assumed leadership of the Tail Section passengers that crashed on one side of the island and remained stuck there for forty-eight (48) days. Since Day One of the Oceanic 815 crash, Ana-Lucia had stepped up and utilized her skills as a police officer to save lives and make decisions when no one else would. Jack, a spinal surgeon, did the same with the surviving passengers from the Fuselage Section on the other side of the island. In one early Season One episode, (1.05) "White Rabbit", he seemed willing to back away from the role of leader, until John Locke convinced him to resume it. Jack remained the leader even after Ana-Lucia and the remaining Tail Section passengers joined the Fuselage camp by the end of Season Two’s (2.08) "Collision". And it was not until after his departure from the island in the Season Four finale, (4.13/4.14) "There's No Place Like Home, Part II" with Hugo "Hurley" Reyes, Sun Kwon, Sayid Jurrah, Kate Austen and Aaron Littleton (the Oceanic Six) that he finally relinquished the position. Recalling the above made me realize something. Human beings – for some reason or other – expect leaders to know everything and always do the right thing. Always. And without fail. Humans seemed to have little tolerance toward the imperfections of our leaders. This certainly seemed to be the case for fictional characters who are leaders. And many fans of "LOST" had harbored a deep lack of tolerance toward Jack and Ana-Lucia’s personal failings. In the case of the former L.A.P.D. police officer, many fans had complained of Ana-Lucia's aggressive personality. They also accused her of being a bitch. In other words, being aggressive and hard – traits many have claimed are more suited for a man - is a sure sign that a woman is a bitch. And unlike other female characters on the series, Ana-Lucia lacked the svelte, feminine looks prevalent in productions such as the 2001-2003 "LORD OF THE RINGS" saga. Actually, gender (and racial) politics may have played a role in the fans' opinion of Jack. His main crime seemed to be that he did not fit the image of a heroic leading white male character. Physically, he looked the part. Unfortunately for Jack, he had failed to live up to those looks. He made the wrong choices on several occasions – choices that included his decision to continue Daniel Farraday's plan to set off the nuclear bomb Jughead in the Season Five finale, (5.16/5.17) "The Incident". It is interesting that many fans had dumped most the blame upon Jack’s shoulders regarding that bomb. And he was partially to blame. But those same fans had failed to remember it was Daniel Faraday who had first insisted upon setting off the bomb to reset time back to the day of Flight 815’s crash – September 22, 2004. And they also failed to recall that Dr. Juliet Burke's decision to set off the bomb for her own reasons was the final action that led to her death. Many had accused Jack of failing to be a proper parent figure to his nephew, Aaron Littleton, during his three years off the island. And at the same time, many had praised Kate Austen for pretending to be the boy’s mother. I found this rather perverse and a little disgusting, considering that Kate had set in motion the lie about her being Aaron’s mother. Jack (along with the remaining members of the Oceanic Six) was guilty of supporting Kate’s lie. But instead of criticizing both for lying about Aaron and keeping him from his Australian grandmother Carole Littleton for nearly three years, many fans had criticized Jack for not being an effective father figure to Aaron and praised a kidnapper like Kate for being a good mother. Ah, the ironies of life. Many fans had accused Jack of being emotionally abusive toward Kate. And yes, they would have every reason to criticize his behavior in episodes like (1.11) “All the Best Cowboys Have Daddy Issues”. But Kate’s own behavior in episodes like (1.12) “Whatever the Case May Be”, which featured her constant lies and attempts to manipulate him and others, occasionally triggered his temper. If one character is going to be criticized for the situations I have previously described, the other character involved should be criticized for his or her own questionable behavior. Some of Jack's other mistakes included sanctioning Sayid’s torture of Sawyer, failure to organize a genuine search for the only child passenger from Oceanic 815′s Fuselage Section, the kidnapped Walt Lloyd, instigating that ludicrous search for Walt’s dad Michael Dawson and communicating with Martin Keamy and the other hired mercenaries aboard the S.S. Kahana. Yet, he had received more complaints about his relationship with Kate, along with his tendencies to get emotional and shed tears than for anything else. Once again, many “LOST”  fans managed to prove that we still live in a patriarchal society. It was okay for female characters to shed tears in very emotional moments, but not male characters. Especially if that one male character happened to be the series’ leading character. Jack's penchant for tears was not the only sign of how some fans can be hypocritical. I have written articles criticizing some of the series' other characters. Most of my articles have criticized Kate Austen. I will be honest. I used to dislike Kate very much. However, my dislike of her has finally abated - somewhat. Most of my dislike had stemmed from her past flaky behavior and especially from the fans’ tendency to excuse her mistakes and crimes . . . or pretend that she had never done anything wrong. However, Kate was not the only character given this leeway. James “Sawyer” Ford had murdered three people – one in Australia and two on the island - within a space of two to three months. Yet, many fans had made constant excuses for his actions. I never disliked Sawyer.  But I have complained about his flaws, mistakes and crimes on numerous occasions. When I did, many fans had pretended that he had done anything wrong. And to this day, I still find this frustrating. Sometime back in Season Two or Season Three, actor Matthew Fox and the show’s producers, Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof, made it known to the media and viewers that they were doing something different with the Jack Shephard character. They took a superficially heroic type – a brilliant surgeon that assumed leadership of a group of stranded castaways – and deconstructed him. In other words, they slowly but surely exposed his flaws and took the character to what could be viewed as the nadir of his existence. Jack eventually climbed out of that existence by the series’ last season.  But certain fans on  many "LOST" message boards and forums made it clear this was not a path they had wanted Jack to take. Instead, these fans had wanted – or demanded that Jack behave like a conventional hero. During most of Season Six, Jack had managed to avoid indulging in self-destructive behavior. He also refrained from displaying any inclination to pursue a romance with Kate. The worst he had done was engage in a temper tantrum over his discovery that the island’s spiritual "man" Jacob had been observing and possibly interfering in the lives of several castaways. Another personality change I noticed was that he had passively allowed others to take the lead without questioning their decisions. I must be honest. I never liked that particular period in Jack's emotional makeup.  It made him seem like a mindless moron. Did Jack finally become the hero that so many had demanded, when he saved the island in the series finale?  Apparently, those responsible for the Emmy nominations believed he had. Why else did they finally nominate Matthew Fox for a Best Actor in a Drama award, after the series' final season. Mind you, Fox had been giving outstanding performances since the first season. But when Jack finally became a likable and somewhat conventional hero, they deemed Fox worthy of an Emmy nomination. Dear God. Personally, I never did care about Jack Shephard's status as a hero. Nor did I really care for his passive behavior in Season Six. But I did hope that he had  finally discovered some inner peace for himself. And I believe that he did during the series’ final moments.

[cha-melodius]

💖🍆🎃🤯🤡🥺 for fanfic ask game! (Sorry for all the emojis and if there are any repeats, feel free to ignore them if there are any!)

This string of emojis sure looks like a party 😂😂😂 Here goes nothing!

💖 What made you start writing?

The very first fanfic I ever wrote? I have no idea, lol. I have no clue how I even got into fandom back then, on the early days of the internet. Then I didn't write anything for like 20 years, never even considered it even when I was pretty involved in internet fandom stuff later. I did sometimes think of scenarios for characters when I was trying to fall asleep, and one day I realized I was repeating one scenario in my head a LOT and maybe I should just write it down lol. Somehow I knew about AO3 even though I wasn't a fanfic reader at that point, either. So that triggered me to pick it up again, though I was still really erratic about my writing until several years later.

🍆 Do you write the spicy stuffs? If so, what's your most popular nsfw fic?

The majority of my fics are not explicit, although the long ones tend to include some sex scenes. The most kudos'd E fic I have is one in which the sex scenes are part of a looong fic, Do You Promise Not to Tell?, which is a CaraDin fic, then after that Love is a Losing Game, in which was incidentally the first time I ventured into Napollya smut.

🎃 Do you write fics for certain holidays? Which is your favorite holiday inspired fic?

Apparently I write Christmas fics, lol, or at least I have for the past couple of years. I guess I should think about what kind of crazy Christmas-themed AU I should write this year. Honestly it's very hard to choose between the two of them, You Must Be A Christmas Tree (You Light Up The Room) and The Makings of a Perfect Christmastime, I love them both so much.

🤯 What's a genre you struggle with as a writer (ex. romance, action, etc.)?

Hmmm. I don't know, human drama? Like, the kind of stuff that's just interpersonal relationships, where there's a lot of just talking. I'm definitely more of an action or romance tropes writer.

🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

I can never think of these in the moment, so I went with one from my most recent fic: “Want to lick the bowl?” Napoleon prompts, smirking as he rips Illya out of his reverie. “I am not a child, Cowboy,” Illya scoffs. Although— he really does want to. As if he can tell (he probably can, goddammit), Napoleon’s smirk deepens. “Suit yourself,” he says with a shrug. 

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?

Illya peeking over Napoleon's shoulder while he's cooking. I am weak for it, as is quite obvious from my fics. Also X character refusing to leave Y character's hospital bedside, and confessions after near-death experiences.

Whew, that's all of them, and none were repeats amazingly! Thanks for asking!

[hms-chill]

Hii! I see you've read RWRB (which means you obviously have impeccable taste) and was wondering if you could recommend any more LGBTQ+ books? Thank you!!

OH MY GOD I HAVE SO MANY!! It really depends on what genre you’re interested in and what you like; I’ll sort of try to break it down that way (and not just rec every gay book I’ve ever read lmao)

General fiction:

 Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Saenz is about two Mexican boys growing up in El Paso in the late 1980s and the writing style is absolutely incredible. It was the first Gay Book(tm) I remember and I spent months of 2012-2013 trying to find a copy and it was 100% worth it.

Simon Vs. the Homo Sapien Agenda by Becky Albertalli. We know it, we love it, I wanted to include it anyway.

The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzie Lee is a historical fiction (leaning on fantasy) romp about a boy in the 18th century going on his grand tour with the best friend he’s in love with; the sequel stars his aro/ace sister. Bi lead, Black gay love interest, and a sequel about the importance of girl friendships.

I’m on page four of Gail Wilhelm’s Torchlight to Valhalla but I love the writing style and the fact that it’s a lesbian book from 1938 that apparently ends happily almost made me cry so there’s that.

anything by Virginia Woolf, but especially Orlando, which is a love letter to her girlfriend.

Soft Place to Fall by Ba Tortuga is a fun gay cowboy romance; it’s dumb and sappy and predictable and fantastic.

Sci-Fi / Fantasy

THIS IS WHERE I THRIVE this is my wheelhouse so sorry if I get carried away lol

anything by Sarah Gailey. Their Upright Women Wanted is about queer librarian spies in a futuristic wild west. The American Hippo series (River of Teeth and Taste of Marrow) is about queer hippo wranglers in an alternate 19th century. Magic for Liars is a murder mystery set in a magic school, perfect if you’re trying to ditch She Who Must Not Be Named but still want your fun magic school itch scratched.

Nottingham by Anna Burke is a lesbian retelling of Robin Hood; I’m still working through it but I’m pretty sure all the merry men are queer women and I couldn’t be happier about it.

Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas is absolutely fantastic; it’s got an entirely Latinx cast with a trans lead and a ghost love interest; 15/10 almost made me cry.

Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo has that casual queer rep that I absolutely adore. Like yeah sometimes you need a book about Being Queer but sometimes you also need a heist where the badass gunslinger casually goes “oh yeah not just girls” and steals a tank, you know?

This is very I’m A Child Of The Late 90s/ Early 2000s but Tamora Pierce was huge for me growing up. She clearly stuffed as many queer characters into her world as publishers would let her, and recently she’s confirmed fan theories about even more queerness (ace/aro characters, trans readings, etc) in her work.

Ursula K. Le Guin’s The Left Hand of Darkness was published in 1969 and treats gender as a fluid thing; I haven’t read it yet but it’s on my bedside table and I’m very excited to get to it.

Poetry

all of it straight people don’t get poems

Badger Clark was a gay cowboy poet; I love his stuff so much. “The Westerner” made me absolutely feral and “Others” gutted me.

Wilfred Owen is best known for his work about WWI, but “Maundy Thursday” and “How Do I Love Thee” are absolutely incredible.

Whitman wrote poems about being gay and was one of the more iconic queer voices of the 19th century, at least in literary circles.

Byron was an icon and also incredibly queer.

Sappho is the iconic one; Anne Carson’s translation of her work (If Not, Winter) is fantastic and the one I’d personally recommend.

Classics

If you’re down to read between the lines do I have some books for you

Stoker was gay (and wrote thirsty letters to Whitman), and no one can convince me that Dracula is a straight book. Arthur and Quincey were dating thank you for coming to my TEDx talk.

The Iliad is long and complex but also Achilles and Patroclus wanted their ashes mixed when they died (fellas...)

anything by Wilde but especially A Portrait of Dorian Gray.

Les Miserables has a character who “admired, loved, and venerated” another man, and who “took great care not to believe in anything” but said other man (fellas...). There’s also an entire page about how the lead has never felt any form of love other than familial (fellas... is it aro to spend a whole page talking about how you’ve never loved anyone).

I haven’t read Moby Dick but I know there’s like three pages about how much the narrator loves his crewmate (fellas...)

Nonfiction

A lot of people are scared of nonfic but I’m gonna let you in on a secret: you don’t have to read the whole book. Pick and choose chapters that interest you, put it down for a year, whatever. Nonfic’ll be there for you.

Portrait of a Marriage by Nigel Nicolson is a look into his parents’ open relationship and his mother’s relationship with Virginia Woolf; it’s a gorgeous exploration of the various ways that love and marriage can be flexible and it changed how I look at relationships.

A Queer History of the United States by Michael Bronski is a good intro to queer history.

We Are Everywhere by Matthew Riemer and Leighton Brown is a great look at the Stonewall Era and the time after especially, and it’s full of incredible pictures. They also run @/lgbt_history on insta and 10/10 for that.

Love and Resistance: Out of the Closet and Into the Stonewall Era by Jason Baumann is fantastic too; it’s got pictures and short descriptions of what’s happening in them. Maybe not a first place, but if you know the general scope of the queer rights movement it’s a fantastic thing (or if you don’t and you’re ready to google lmao).

My Dear Boy or anything else by Rictor Norton is incredible. My Dear Boy is a collection of gay love letters; he’s also got books on queer culture in 18th century London and queering the Gothic. You can find a lot of his stuff online here and My Dear Boy specifically here.

If you want more/ something more specific, don’t hesitate!! I work in a library and I’m always finding new gay stuff and I love it.

[litwitlady]

The Fix, Part One

The hour is late. Last call looming on the tip of Maria’s tongue. Alex is hunched over the bartop, spinning his empty tumbler in circles across the sticky, splintered wood. Little rainbows dancing as the light refracts.

Behind him, Michael is tucked into his favorite booth. Every so often he dares a glance at Alex’s back. Hoping to catch him peering over his shoulder. But so far, nothing. So, he’s scarring the already scratched table with his keys – dragging the jagged edge over and over along the soft lacquered wood. Knowing Maria will not be pleased.

But he can fix the table. He can fix anything. Anything except him and Alex.

Not that he’s tried. Best he’s done is make things worse.

A song comes on the jukebox. Some summer love song sung soft and slow. Sweet, candy-pop voice melting around the love-drunk lyrics of a second chance romance. Michael rolls his eyes, pockets his keys, and grabs his hat to leave.

And that’s when Alex decides to look back. Michael’s breath catches.

He strides to the bar, cowboy bravado firmly in place. Straddles the stool next to Alex and tosses his hat onto the bar. ‘Come here often?’

Alex huffs out a bitter sounding laugh. ‘More often that usual lately. But you know that already. Been here every night I’ve been here.’

‘Yeah, well. The Pony is practically my home. You normally have better things to do. Better company to keep.’

‘Better company is now long gone company.’ He pulls out his wallet and throws a few bills on the bar. Sets his whiskey glass on top. ‘But I bet you knew that too.’

‘Word gets around. Townies like to gossip.’ Michael darts his eyes to Maria. She’s paying them no mind.

Alex snorts. ‘So does the local dive bar owner, apparently.’

‘Don’t be mad at DeLuca. I’d already guessed anyway.’ He runs the back of his finger along Alex’s jawline. ‘Your barely there stubble gave you away. Thought the military didn’t allow such homeliness?’

Alex swats his hand away. ‘Took a few days off. Corner of my roof caved in under all that rain last week.’

‘Wait, what?’ Michael sits up straighter, concerned. ‘Why didn’t you call me? I would have fixed it for free. And better than whatever half-assed fix Hal Rivers managed.’

‘Hal Rivers is a certified contractor.’

Michael scoffs. ‘Hal Rivers is a no-good grifter. I’ll stop by this weekend to check it out. Or better yet - tonight. Right now.’ He drops his hat onto his head and hops off his stool.

‘Guerin, it’s nearly two in the morning. I’m going home and I’m going to bed. My roof is fine.’ But he doesn’t move from his stool. Just stares up at Michael from where he still sits.

It is late. And he’s tired too. But Michael falls back onto the stool anyway. Facing Alex. Knees lightly touching. ‘Please can I check? Just a quick in and out. I promise.’

Alex rolls his eyes and sighs. ‘In and out.’

They walk out of the bar together. Maria watches them go and smiles to herself. Shoots a quick text to Isobel with a delighted update.

Outside the night is clear. The stars numerous and bright. Moon hanging low and full over the distant mountain peaks. Only a few cars remain in the dirt lot this close to last call. Michael and Alex are parked on opposite sides. Neither speaking as they separate.

It’s true that Alex’s roof has been perfectly repaired. It’s also true that Michael is well aware that Hal Rivers is no con man. But what’s equally true is that neither one of them cares about the roof repair in the first place. There’s a game afoot. And that game must be played.

To the end. To the beginning. Only time will tell.  

They park beside each other in Alex’s driveway. Michael follows Alex to his front door, silent and trailing a few steps behind. Inside, the lights click on and Alex shrugs off his jacket. ‘Spare bedroom. Don’t dally, Guerin.’

Michael heads back alone and gets a text from Isobel as soon as he opens the bedroom door. Just a single sentence.

You better wake up next to Alex tomorrow morning, Michael.

He shoves his phone into his pocket, swearing at her under his breath. Maria, too. It’s clear now that they are in cahoots. Probably have been for some time. He hates when Isobel meddles. But what he hates even more are the newfound unbidden images that are looping through his mind.

Alex panting, sweaty and naked beneath him. Hands fisting at clean, cotton sheets. The soft way he always moans when Michael laps at his nipple. Heels crushing into the mattress as toes curl in on themselves. The sex-drunk, bed-tousled look of him on the rare morning after.

‘Are you done?’

Michael startles, crashing out of his daze. ‘Um, not yet.’ What he lacks in eloquence he makes up in brevity. He cuts his eyes to Alex who is leaning in the doorway – half-naked, jeans slung low on his hips. Belt nowhere to be found. Michael smirks at him. ‘You’ve always been such a tease.’

Alex quirks an eyebrow. ‘And you didn’t come here to check on my roof.’

At least now it’s all out on the table.

‘I bet you haven’t eaten. I’ll make you a sandwich.’ Alex nods towards the kitchen and leaves. Expecting Michael to follow. Which he does. Stomach already growling. He doesn’t know how Alex knew. Alex has just always known exactly what he needs. Since they were seventeen.

Michael hops up onto Alex’s kitchen counter and watches him work. ‘As much as I love shirtless sandwich-making Captain Alex, I’m pretty sure I don’t deserve this. So what gives?’

‘I’m guessing you got a text a few minutes ago. From Isobel?’ Alex spreads peanut butter and jelly onto four slices of breads.

‘And you got one from Maria.’ He laughs. ‘They aren’t very good at this.’

‘Subtle, no. But we are alone together.’ He cuts both sandwiches into triangles and hands two slices to Michael.

They eat silently. Both considering what they want from their current situation. Michael can’t help but drag his eyes over Alex’s body. A body he knows so well, each soft curve and taut muscle memorized in the curl of his fingers. He wants to take Alex to bed. He wants to stay the night. He wants to stay the rest of his life.

‘Is that what you want?’ Alex sets his sandwich aside and slinks between Michael’s thighs. ‘You want to ignore all the fucked up shit between us and let me fuck you over my dining room table? Right here, right now.’ He slides his hands around Michael’s hips and licks his lips. ‘Is that what you really want, Michael?’ 

All he can do is shake his head.

‘Good. Because it’s not going to happen.’ He turns back to his sandwich.

The tension is so thick it burns. ‘I want to talk. That’s what I want.’ Michael slides off the counter and moves to stand next to Alex. ‘What do you want?’

Alex grips the edge of the sink, triceps flexing, and sighs. ‘I want you to crawl into a time machine, travel back to open mic night and make some better fucking choices.’ His voice isn’t just laced with anger, it is drowning in his fury.

‘But I can’t do that.’ He can fix anything. Anything except him and Alex.

‘Then I want you to leave, Michael.’ He pushes off the counter and disappears from the kitchen, bedroom door slamming behind him.

Michael stands alone in the moonlight. Fists clenched and tears threatening. He can fix anything. Anything. Anything. Anything. But not this.

[metalandmagi]

Summer 2019 Anime Worth Watching

Summer is here, and with it brings another new season of anime! In case you’re feeling lost and want to find some new shows to pass the time, here’s some of the anime I think are worth checking out...because some really good shows tend to fly under the radar. I think there’s some genuinely interesting stuff this season, so hopefully you’ll find something you like too. 

I also have a Winter list and a Spring list and a fall list now!

And here’s my master list for 2020

New Shows!

Given: A *cough* BL *cough* romance anime in which tsundere highschool guitarist Ritsuka Uenoyama is on the verge of losing his passion for music when he stumbles upon the sleepy-eyed Mafuyu Sato who constantly carries a guitar around that he doesn’t know how to play. Drama and musical shenanigans ensue. This was by far my most anticipated show of the season, because I happen to have read a few chapters of this manga and liked it a lot. The only reason I stopped was because I wanted to hear the music in this music oriented story...so naturally the anime makes me very happy. Not only is it sweet and cute with great animation, but it’s also hilarious. Sato is also basically a human incarnation of a lost puppy, and you just help but fall in love with him and the other characters! AND NOW WE HAVE TWO GAY MUSIC SHOWS THIS SEASON! 

Dr. STONE: An action adventure anime that takes place 3,700 years in the future after the world is struck with a mysterious phenomenon that turns the entire human race to stone. Our protagonists: the genius, scientific minded Senku Ishigami and the muscle-y comic relief Taiju Oki, must find a way to rebuild civilization and turn humanity back to normal using the POWER OF SCIENCE! It’s fun, good looking, and way more interesting than I thought it would be. I’m not very attached to the main characters yet, although it’s still early. I’m mainly sticking around for the plot, the comedy, and the answers to the crazy amount of questions I have after watching the first episode!

Fire Force: An action/drama where super powered fire fighters must protect Tokyo from people who are spontaneously combusting while our hero Shinra must find out who started the fire that killed his mother. More than anything, I’d say this show is definitely worth watching for the cinematography and action because almost every second has been high flying dynamic animation that really grips you. It reminds me a lot of Soul Eater, the story and characters have a lot of potential, and you know an anime will be good when the girls have muscles too!

If it’s for My Daughter, I’d Even Defeat a Demon Lord: Can you tell it’s based on a light novel? A slice of life set in a fantasy world where an adventurer named Dale stumbles upon an adorable lost little girl in the woods, who happens to be branded as a criminal. So of course Dale basically adopts her and tries to find out how she came to be with him. It’s basically fantasy School Babysitters without the tragic depth to it (but there’s room for potential). Yes, this is definitely the most wholesome show of the season, but it’s to be expected considering it’s basically Japan’s latest attempt to get people to have more babies. Personally, the most interesting aspect of this show is the fact that Dale and his “daughter” can’t speak the same language. Unfortunately, the light novel ends up pulling a Bunny Drop...so I sincerely hope the anime doesn’t try the creepy romance factor. So for now, if you feel like puking up some rainbows, give this one a try. 

To the Abandoned Sacred Beasts: An action drama where, during a civil war, one side used “forbidden technology” to enhance their soldiers and basically turn them into badass monsters. The only problem: the soldiers who were turned start to lose their humanity and end up killing humans for the fun of it. Now our protagonist must hunt down his fellow soldiers and kill them before it’s too late. Honestly, this show has some pacing issues and can be a bit stilted in terms of its character interactions, but what kept me watching was the last 5 minutes of the first episode. I was so not prepared for the roller coaster that was the first episode’s ending, and now I’m extremely intrigued. Besides it’s made by MAPPA so I would at least give it a couple episodes to see if it’s for you.   

Vinland Saga: The story of a young boy named Thorfinn’s journey to become a great warrior and while the adults deal with going to war. IT’S THE ONE WITH THE VIKINGS!!! It basically feels like a darker, grittier viking version of Moana. I’ve heard literally nothing but praise for this manga for so many years that my hopes skyrocketed as soon as I heard Wit was doing the adaption. And it has definitely lived up to the hype so far! It’s a great action historical drama to fill the void after Dororo. The only problem is no one will watch it because it’s on Amazon Prime.

Kochouki: Wakaki Nobunaga: A fun brightly colored historical anime about the famous warlord Nobunaga when he was a young teenager. I honestly don’t know what the tone of this anime is going to be from here on out, because it’s going to go from “fun thieving shenanigans with pretty boys” to leading people into battle, but it got me interested. I know putting Nobunaga in an anime isn’t exactly original, but this one seems like a fun ride...and it looks gay as fuck. 

And I have to shout out some that haven’t premiered yet...just in case...

Try Knights: This one doesn’t come out until the end of July, but you bet your ass I’m going to be watching it because it’s an original anime about PRETTY BOYS PLAYING RUGBY! And I have a feeling it’s going to be very... different from the other resident rugby anime All Out. 

Yokai Ningen BEM (Humanoid Monster BEM): Okay, this one’s not out yet either, but the trailer had a really cool vibe to it, so I’m including it anyway. It’s a remake of the 1968 anime in which a group of yokai who look like humans fight crime in the big city. If nothing else, the music is cool, and it’s made by Production I.G, so why not?

*UPDATE* The first episode finally dropped, and holy crap I’m so into this. It’s basically Durarara mixed with Psycho Pass mixed with Bungo Stray Dogs. The first episode has me completely hooked!

Next seasons and continuations!

As always there are some leftovers from the spring season that are continuing into the summer that I highly suggest!

Carole and Tuesday: The musical sci-fi anime directed by Shinichiro Watanabe wherein a rich runaway named Tuesday meets a streetwise girl named Carole, and the two decide to start a band together. Now Carole and Tuesday must rise to stardom in a world dominated by android created music. It was by far my favorite new show of the spring, and if you can find a way to watch it (because it’s still not available legally anywhere aside from Japanese Netflix apparently) I wholeheartedly recommend it. It’s got the best and most diverse music I’ve seen in an anime in a long time, an interesting setting (apparently it takes place in the Cowboy Bebop universe!?), and very well rounded fun characters. And I'm dying for a soundtrack release with all the songs!!!!

Fruits Basket 2019: Yes, the remake of the classic 2001 anime in which a girl moves in with a family who can turn into animals from the zodiac is getting a full run. And thank God because I just can’t say goodbye to it after only 12 episodes. It is so stunningly beautiful in both animation and story subjects that I don’t know what I would do without it. The characters feel so much more fleshed out, and I feel like I learn a lesson about life each week even though I already know most of what’s going to happen. If you never watched the original because thought you were too “cool” to watch a shoujo anime, give it a chance. Because if you think it’s just a generic love triangle romance show, you couldn’t be more wrong. The reboot is so good at portraying different kinds of love and how the presence of love and family can change lives AND IT’S JUST SO FREAKING GOOD! 

Demon Slayer Kimetsu no Yaiba: In case you missed Ufotable’s newest project, this is a shounen anime that follows a young boy named Tanjiro and his sister Nezuko who has been possessed by a demon and their journey to turn Nezuko back to normal while fighting demons along the way. I still feel like this is a pretty basic shounen anime story wise, but I really like the characters, especially the villains. It has some of the coolest fighting/power mechanics I’ve seen in awhile, and the animation is very cool and different!

Ace of Diamond act 2: Our favorite shounen baseball anime is continuing into the summer. And I have very mixed feelings about this season so far. We are getting some fun new characters and some great scenes with the team, but the games are very...choppy and rushed. Apparently this is how it goes down in the manga, and we’re in for some good Sawamura development...but it’s still touch and go for me personally.  

That’s it for now. Most of these are available on Crunchyroll, except Vinland Saga, Carole and Tuesday, and Kochouki: Wakaki Nobunaga. Since Try Knights and Yokai Ningen BEM aren’t out yet, I don’t know where they will be available legally. 

See you next season!

[averylainey]

A Second Date

Clementine and Louis have a second date to continue getting to know each other better.

“I hate you,” she jested. “I love you too.” He smirked. “Even if you do have a weird thing for cowboys.” “Damn it, I do not! You’re never gonna let this go, are you?” “Absolutely not.” 

~  AO3  ~  FF  ~

Clementine grit her teeth and dug her nails into her bed sheet as a sharp pain shot up her leg. She  raised her head slightly and looked to the foot of her bed where Ruby was busy dabbing the limb with a wet cloth to clean it. The redhead insisted on cleaning it every day until it scarred over. It was already a miracle that Clementine had survived the amputation; Ruby didn’t want to test their luck with an infection. She gave the other girl a sympathetic look.

“I’m sorry, hon. I know it sucks, but it’s gotta be done,” Ruby said, rubbing the injured girl’s other leg in a futile attempt to soothe her. 

“I know,” Clementine grumbled, squeezing her eyes shut and resting her head back against her pillow. Of course she was grateful to Ruby for looking out for her, but God, did this suck.

It had been a little over a week since she returned home, and her recovery was going a lot more smoothly than anyone expected it would. The color had returned to her skin, and she was able to stay awake for the better part of most days. The pain was still overwhelming at times, but with the help of painkillers and emotional support from the other kids, she was able to push through it. 

AJ had been particularly attentive-- not that that was at all surprising. He spent most of his time by her bedside when she was awake, keeping her spirits up and making sure that she had everything she needed. He wasn’t beside her today, however. This was the first day he had left the walls of the school since they came home. He had initially been reluctant to go too far away from her, as even though she was improving, he was still terrified that something would go wrong. He was still terrified that he’d lose her. But that morning, Clementine was finally able to convince him not to worry-- that she wasn’t going anywhere, so he hesitantly agreed to go hunting with Aasim and Louis. 

When he headed out, leaving her alone in her room, part of her regretted telling him to go. Having him around kept her from thinking too hard about her condition. She tried her best to suppress it, but she couldn’t help the grief she felt over the loss of her leg. She knew that her disability would make life a lot harder from here on out; there were so many things she’d probably never be able to do again….

A light knocking at the door brought Clementine out of her thoughts. She propped herself up on an elbow and called out, “Come in.” 

The door opened and Louis stepped in. 

“Hey,” he greeted her with a grin and shut the door behind him.

“Hey, you.” She smiled affectionately at him then raised an eyebrow when she noticed that AJ wasn’t with him. “Where’s AJ?” 

“He wanted to help Aasim get a rabbit ready for dinner,” he told her then glanced at Ruby, who was still busy tending to Clementine’s leg. “Uh, I can come back later if you want.”

“No, it’s ok.” She stared down at her leg and frowned before meeting his eyes again. “Honestly, I could use a little moral support.”

Louis mirrored her dejected expression and walked the short distance to her bed. He crouched down beside her and took her hand in his.

“I’m so sorry, Clem. I--”

“Hey, I said I need support, not a pity party,” she interrupted.

He dropped the rest of his sentence with an amused exhale and squeezed her hand. “Right. Sorry.”

“So… how was hunting?” Clementine asked, wanting to shift the conversation away from her plight.

“Pretty good. We caught a couple rabbits, and I showed AJ how to reset the traps.”

“That’s good.” She chuckled before adding, “Guess you’ve replaced me as his sidekick, huh?”

“Hey, he’s the sidekick,” Louis joked, earning another light laugh from the girl. Of course, the sight of her laughing brought a grin to his face, as it never failed to do. 

Clementine looked lovingly at him for a moment before extending her arms to him for a hug, which he happily gave. 

“Thanks,” she mumbled into his shoulder.

“For?”

“Just, y’know... being here. It helps.”

He pulled slightly out of her embrace and kissed the tip of her nose. “I’ll always be here.”

A soft giggle from the end of the bed caused the pair to separate. Ruby had finally finished cleaning the girl’s wound and was looking fondly at them. They both blushed and lowered their eyes; they had almost forgotten she was there….

“Y’all are too cute,” Ruby remarked, shaking her head. She noticed the redness on their faces and gave them a small reassuring smile. “You don’t have t’ be embarrassed. It’s real sweet how close you two have gotten.”

Ruby picked up a roll of bandages and turned her attention back to Clementine’s leg. 

“I’m a lil’ jealous,” the redhead admitted, still looking down as she began to wrap the fresh gauze around the limb. “Not, y’know, of either of you specifically,” she quickly clarified. “Just of what y’all have, I guess.”

Ruby paused and looked back up to them. They were staring at her expectantly, apparently waiting for further explanation, so she continued:

“I used t’ read those sappy romance books the old English teacher kept in her desk and wish I could experience somethin’ like that,” she continued and smiled sadly at her hands. “I stopped a while ago, though, when I realized it wouldn’t ever happen.”

“Well, how do you know it won’t?” Clementine cut in gently. 

“I dunno… Not a lotta people left... And I doubt any of ‘em would like me.”

Clementine was surprised to hear that she felt that way. Did she really not realize that Aasim had a massive crush on her? He wasn’t exactly very subtle about it….

“You don’t know that. Maybe somebody does,” the brunette hinted.

She looked to Louis, who had his hand over his mouth in an attempt to hide the huge knowing grin that spread across his face. He dropped his hand and opened his mouth to speak but was stopped short by a light tugging on his wrist. He glanced down to find Clementine gripping it then shifted his gaze to her face and gave her a questioning look. ‘Don’t,’ she mouthed, knowing exactly what he was planning to say. As much as she herself wanted to just tell Ruby about Aasim’s crush too, she knew that they shouldn’t. It wouldn’t be fair to either of them. Louis pouted but obeyed and stayed silent.

Ruby raised an eyebrow at their behavior but chose not to question it.

“I don’t think so,” she sighed as she tied off the fresh bandage on Clementine’s leg. “Well, think I’m all done here.” Ruby stood and wiped her hands on her pants. “Anything else I can get’cha?”

Clementine shook her head. “I’m ok. Thanks, Ruby.”

She gave a little nod in response and turned to leave the bedroom. Clementine and Louis watched as she exited the room and gently closed the door behind her. They stayed quiet for a moment, listening to the sound of her footsteps down the hall fade away.

“I can’t believe this,” Louis quickly broke the silence, shaking his head in incredulity.

“I know, right?” Clementine agreed. “She really has no idea.”

 “I gotta tell her.” He turned to Clementine. “Come on, you shoulda let me tell her. This is too perfect.”

“No, he needs to tell her.”

“But he won’t, Clem. It’s been, like, a year.”

“Just... give it a little more time. He’s not very good at hiding it; she’s gonna find out eventually.” 

Louis crossed his arms and quirked his brow at her, clearly unconvinced. Noticing his skepticism, the girl continued:

“What if someone else told you that I like you?” she asked. “Wouldn’t that have kinda ruined it?”

“Honestly, I would’ve just thought they were fucking with me.” He stared at the door and frowned, pausing to consider her point for a minute before sighing in defeat. “...I guess you’re right.”

“Of course. I’m always right.”

He smirked at her. “I’m still gonna keep harassing Aasim about it, though.”

Clementine snickered. “That’s fine; you should. Just don’t tell Ruby anything.”

“Deal.”

Louis looked down in thought for a second. He sat down on the bed beside her and awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. “So, um...anyways... I actually came in here for a reason,” he said.

“Oh? What’s that?”

“Well, y’know, I figured you must be bored laying in here all day, so I thought, ‘Hey, what better time for our second official date?’” He pulled his deck of cards out of his coat pocket, set it on the bed between them, and looked to her with a hint of anxiety on his face as he waited for a response. 

She gave him a soft smile. “That’s a good idea. I am pretty bored.” 

Louis smiled and let out a breath of relief, which Clementine took notice of.  

“What? You thought I was gonna say no?” she asked as she sat up and rested her back against the wall.

“I mean, not really, but”-- he shrugged-- “you never know. Maybe, in the last thirty seconds, you realized you actually hate me.”

Clementine rolled her eyes. “No such luck,” she joked before focusing on the deck of cards sitting on the bed. “So, did you have a game in mind?” she asked the boy.

“Oh, uh, yeah. Y’know, I still don’t really know a lot about you, so I thought we could play the game we did the night you first got here. Remember? Highest card asks a question?”

“Yeah, I remember,” she confirmed. “Is War the only card game you know?”

“Of course not; it’s just the easiest. I know Golf, Spades, Cribbage, some that I made up...” As he listed off card games, Louis split the deck in half and handed half of the cards to Clementine. “I also know how to play Poker, but I hate it.”

“Why?”

“It’s boring.” He paused before mumbling, “And Violet always beats me.”

The girl chuckled. “Really?”

“Yeah. She’s impossible to read. I think she’s secretly a lizard-person,” he said, somehow keeping a completely straight face.

Clementine burst out laughing. 

“Don’t tell her I said that,” Louis added, as he laughed along with her. 

“Don’t worry; I won’t.” The girl’s smile faltered. “She… doesn’t really talk to me anyway.”

Not wanting to ruin the mood, Clementine quickly changed the subject. “So”-- she held up the stack of cards Louis had given her-- “are we gonna play?”

Louis nodded and gave the cards in his hand a quick shuffle. They each drew a card from their respective stacks and flipped it over; Clementine won with an eight of diamonds. 

“You win,” Louis said. “What do you wanna know?”

Clementine looked up and thought for a second. She couldn’t think of anything particularly creative to ask, so she just asked the first question that came to her mind:

“What’s your favorite color?”

“Damn, we’re already starting with the real hard-hitting questions, huh?”

The girl smiled and rolled her eyes in response before looking back at him expectantly. 

“It’s green,” he told her. “What’s yours?”

Clementine raised an eyebrow and smirked at him. “Hey, I thought only winners got to ask questions,” she teased.

“Ok, new rule then: losers can ask follow-up questions.” 

“Fine,” she chuckled before answering, “Mine is pink.”

“No way. You’re lying.” 

“What? What’s wrong with pink?”

“Nothing!” he laughed. “I just wasn’t expecting that. I thought you were gonna say something hardcore like black or blood red or something.” His expression softened. “That’s kinda cute-- that it’s just pink.”

The girl snorted, trying to hide the slight blush that crept onto her cheeks at his words. “If you say so.”

“Wait, what kind of pink, though? Hot pink?” Louis suddenly asked. 

“Ew, no.” Clementine wrinkled her nose at the thought of that obnoxious color. “Just regular pink,” she specified.

“Ok, good,” he chuckled and took the card she had drawn out of her hand, stacking it with his and setting it to the side. He motioned for her to draw again for the second round. “After you.”

Clementine drew another card from her stack and flipped it over: six of spades. Louis followed and produced a three of hearts.

“I win again.” The girl smirked at him. 

Louis shook his head and said flatly, “You’re cheating.”

She scoffed. “What? How do you even cheat at this game?”

“You stacked the deck.”

“It’s your deck!” she laughed.

“Alright, fair point… I got my eye on you, though.” He winked at her. “What’s your question?”

This time, she already had a question in mind. “Where are you from?” she asked. “Before you came here, I mean.” 

Louis smiled and answered, “Baltimore.”  

“That’s cool; that baseball guy I met was from there,” Clementine shared.

He raised his eyebrows. “No shit? What was his name?”

“Javier Garcia.”

“Wait, seriously? I’ve met him.”

Clementine’s eyes widened. “Really? When?”

“Yeah. Well, kinda. My grandparents used to take me to the baseball games in the city sometimes. He signed a ball for me. I think I still have it somewhere...” He shook his head and chuckled to himself. “I can’t believe you met Javier Garcia and didn’t tell me.”

She giggled at his enthusiasm then shrugged. “You never asked.”

“Alright, you gotta tell me everything now. How’d you meet him?”

“Well… I, uh…” Clementine sighed, slightly embarrassed of how she had acted back then. “I almost shot him; then, I tried to rob him.” 

Louis snorted. “Really, Clem? I mean, I knew you were edgy, but damn.”

She rubbed the back of her neck and said sheepishly, “Yeah… I was going through some shit at the time… He was pretty cool about it, though.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. He was a pretty cool guy in general,” she said and placed her card atop the other discarded ones. “He’s kinda like you-- little less dorky though.”

“Dorky!?” Louis clutched his chest and feigned offense.

“In a good way!” she quickly added with a laugh before switching focus to her stack of cards. She held them up and asked, “Round three?”

“‘Round three?’ You’re really gonna act like you didn’t just insult me like that?” He continued pretending to be offended as he drew another card. Before Clementine could respond or even draw a card herself, he blurted out, “I win.” and revealed that he had drawn an ace. 

“Not necessarily,” she protested. “What if I get an ace too?”

“I’d be very shocked.”

Clementine picked the top card off her stack and lifted it up in front of her face so that he couldn’t see it. She smirked. “It’s an ace,” she told him.

Louis looked at her skeptically and peeked over the top of the card to see what it really was. “That’s a four, darling.” 

The girl sighed and dropped the card. “Fine... I guess losers do deserve to win at least once.”

“Exactly,” he agreed before asking his question: “What’s your favorite kind of music?”

Clementine smiled; that was such a him thing to ask. She pursed her lips as she considered the question. Music hadn’t really been a part of her life like it had Louis’. When she and AJ were living on the road, they avoided it for the most part; it was unnecessary noise. She had probably heard more music in the past month at the school than in all her years on the road. 

“Honestly, I don’t know. I never really had the chance to listen to much music before I came here,” she admitted. “Sometimes me and AJ would listen to some rock CD in the car; I guess that was pretty cool.”

“Rock? That makes sense.”

Clementine shrugged and moved to draw another card, but Louis interrupted her:

“Wait, you’re not gonna ask what mine is?”

“I already know what yours is.” She smirked at him. “It’s obviously super girly pop music.”

“Ah, shit! How’d you know!?” he joked. 

“Gut feeling,” she joked back as she grabbed the next card off her stack.

She drew a Jack, beating Louis’ draw of a nine.

“Yes!” Clementine pumped her fist in celebration of her victory. “I have a good one this time.”

“Oh boy,” Louis said, slightly worried. “What is it?”

“What’s your biggest irrational fear?” she asked.

He eyed her suspiciously. “Um, you’re not trying to get ammunition to use against me are you?”

“No!” she laughed. “I’m just curious.”

“Ok...” Louis sighed before answering, “I’m terrified of wasps.”

“Wasps?”

“Yeah. I hate them. A couple years back we found a wasps’ nest under the lookout tower. I wouldn’t go outside for a week.”

“Are you allergic to them or something?” the girl asked.

“No, they’re just… fucking demonic, y’know?” he replied as an involuntary shiver ran down his spine at the thought of the wretched insects.

Clementine giggled. “Yeah, I guess they kinda are.”

“I’m glad you understand,” he chuckled then raised an eyebrow at her. “So, what’s your irrational fear, then?”

 “Oh, I’m not scared of anything,” she responded matter-of-factly.

“Everyone’s scared of something.”

“Not me.”

 Louis pouted. “Come on, I told you mine.”

She stared into his pleading eyes for a moment before groaning and giving in. “I guess I’m kinda creeped out by mirrors,” she confessed.

“What? Mirrors? How could someone as pretty as you hate mirrors?”

“Ha ha,” she replied sarcastically before explaining, “They give me a weird feeling... like they’re watching me or something.” She shuddered. “I don’t know how to explain it; they’re just creepy.”

The boy gave her an amused look. “Not gonna lie, that’s… a pretty weird fear. Was not expecting that,” he said.

“Hey, don’t judge me.” 

“I wasn’t.” He held up his hands. “There’s nothing wrong with you being scared of mirrors. In fact, if you want, I’ll go smash every mirror in the school for you right now.”

Clementine snickered. “I think I’ll be alright.”

“Ok, if you say so.” Louis picked up his stack of cards, preparing to draw for the next round, but before he did, he added, “If you ever change your mind, though, lemme know. I will do it.”

“I’ll let you know,” she promised. 

The pair each drew another card, and this time, Louis won with a seven of clubs. He held his card up to his lips as he considered whether or not he really wanted to ask the question he had in mind. Clementine cleared her throat and raised her wrist as if she were checking an imaginary watch, teasing the boy for taking so long to ask his question. So he decided to just go for it: 

“Alright, I gotta ask… And I’m not judging, ok? But...” Louis reached over her and picked up a book that had been laying on the opposite side of her bed. He held it up in front of her and asked,“What the fuck is this?”

“Oh God.” Clementine could feel her face begin to burn when she saw the cover. It was one of those cringeworthy western romance novels with a shirtless man in a cowboy hat on the front. The terrible thing was mixed in with a stack of a few books that Ruby had given her a couple days prior. The girl tried to explain herself:

“It’s a book Ruby brought me to read when I get bored. She gave me a few different books, and-- and I already read all the others. So y’know, I thought reading it would at least be better than staring at the ceiling. I--It’s super dumb. I swear I’m only reading it to laugh at it.”

Louis smirked at her babbling. “Right. Sure.” 

“I promise!” Clementine really wasn’t lying. The book was horrible-- probably the worst thing she had ever read in her life. It was almost impressive how bad it was, and that made it hilarious to her. But of course, Louis wasn’t going to let her off that easy.

“So what’s it about, then?” he asked as he scanned the pages, stopping when his eye caught a particularly cringeworthy passage. He smirked at the girl beside him and began to dramatically recite it:

Annabelle watched with wide eyes as he dismounted the horse, his bare six-pack glistening in the afternoon sun. God, he was sooo hot. He took off his cowboy hat and ran his fingers through his hair before turning to her and smiling. “Howdy, baby. I have come back for you,” he said in his deep, sultry voice.

Clementine lied back and buried her burning face into her hands. “Please stop,” she laughed. Of course, he ignored her and continued reading:

“Oh, Bill. I knew you would.” She ran into his arms and kissed him passionately. He tightened his hold on her and pulled her to the ground with him. He tenderly stroked her-- 

Louis cringed. “Oof, that’s a little inappropriate,” he mumbled to himself and quickly flipped a few pages ahead until he found a different section to read. “Here we go.”

Luckily for Clementine, before he could start reading whatever awful new passage he found, the dorm door opened and someone stepped inside. Louis lowered the book and turned around to see who it was. He smiled when he saw that it was AJ.

“Hey, little dude!”

“Hi,” AJ greeted the older boy then raised an eyebrow when he caught sight of Clementine lying back with her hands covering her beet-red face. “Uh, what are you doing?”

“I’m just reading Clem her favorite book,” Louis replied nonchalantly. 

“It’s not my favorite book! I hate it!” the girl blurted out. 

“Oh, stop lying, Clem. Your secret’s out; you might as well own it.”

“I hate you,” she jested.

“I love you too.” He smirked. “Even if you do have a weird thing for cowboys.”

“Damn it, I do not! You’re never gonna let this go, are you?”

“Absolutely not,” he laughed, planting a quick kiss on her cheek. 

“Lou, I swear to God when I get out of this bed...” Clementine playfully threatened.

“I’ll go into hiding,” he chuckled and stared down at the book in his hands. Something suddenly occurred to him. “Wait, so Ruby gave this to you?”

Clementine nodded. “She did.”

“I wonder if this is one of those sappy books she was talking about.” He mindlessly flipped through the pages then slipped the novel into an inner pocket of his coat and flashed her a sly grin. “I’m gonna show it to Aasim-- tell him to take notes and act it out for her.”

“Great idea,” she snorted. “You can torment him instead.”

“He is pretty fun to torment.” He grinned mischievously then glanced at the door. “...I’ll be back.”

Clementine watched as Louis stood and rushed out of the dorm room, his coat flapping behind him. She chuckled to herself as she heard him running down the hall. She loved that idiot.

“...I don’t get it,” AJ suddenly said. “What just happened?”

“Don’t worry about it, kiddo,” Clementine chuckled. “He's just being a dork.”

End Note: Thanks for reading! ♥

[clarste]

Sorry if you've been asked this explicitly before, but what are your thoughts on Penguin Logistics, specifically in comparison to the other organisations/factions in Arknights? I recently started and managed to grab everyone within a few pulls, except Sora (and I guess Mostima, unfortunately.) and I think they're easily my favourites. Would love to hear your thoughts. Cheers.

No one's ever asked me that, but they probably should have since I've gone all-in on Penguin Logistics ever since I pulled Exusiai and Croissant early on. I then proceeded to never pull any of the others, forcing me to buy Texas and Sora in the shop and much later dump all of my accumulated gacha currency getting Mostima. Anyway, my goal in life is to use the entire team and also max them all out. PL4life!

Anyway, my initial impression of them was that they were the cast of a 90s anime like Cowboy Bebop or Bubblegum Crisis (...Tokyo 2040). Like, they're an eclectic band of hyper-competent misfits working for a small company operating at the edge of the law. “Penguin Logistics” itself sounds like a euphemism for being, like, smugglers or something. "We'll get your package where it needs to go, no questions asked." Then Code of Brawl came out and I was totally right except they are also very dumb in a funny way. Like, they accidentally got into a turf war with the mafia, but apparently that's just business as usual.

Anyway I want to talk about each of them individually now so apologies if this starts rambling.

Texas is pretty clearly the main character of Penguin Logistics, and you can tell because she's the hub of their whole relationship wheel on the in-game chart.

She's also kinda Spike from Cowboy Bebop, although less laid-back I guess. She's a former mafia assassin on the run from her past, but her past won't leave her alone. Incidentally, "mafia" in this case refers to the various wolf families from the fantasy Italy equivalent in this setting, although they make some interesting comparisons to wolf packs in the profiles. However, Texas's family is dead, which should make her a "lone wolf" that will supposedly never have another place to belong. Except PL itself is proof that that's wrong.

Theoretically she’s just the team’s driver, but because PL is always getting into ridiculous anime fights she’s also good at that part too, using dozens of little... lightsabers(?) that she throws around willy nilly. It would probably look super-cool to see in action, except this is not that kind of game so we’ll just have to wait for the anime or whatever. It’s noted in her profile that her fighting style shows that she unconsciously sees as the only purpose of a weapon as being to kill, and heck, she’s right.

She's cool-headed, adaptable, and the serious one you can always count on, but she's not above getting into friendly(?) brawls just to take out her frustrations out.

Her name comes from the extinct subspecies of Texas Wolf.

Next up is Exusiai, the angel who loves nothing more than guns, god, rock and roll, and apple pie. In that order. In other words, a stereotypical American. Even though she's from the fantasy-Vatican. Basically she's a cheerful, friendly, laid-back person who never really fit in back home where people are expected to be more serious and orderly. Not enough to be, like, shunned or anything but she's always been a weirdo. All angels have guns though, that’s like standard issue. She wishes she could have more though.

She's also super religious, but interestingly never brings it upon her own. I feel like she probably realizes how uncomfortable it can make people who don't share that religion to suddenly bring up Jesus all the time in casual conversation. Like, she's not ashamed of it or anything, but she won't shove it in your face either. Personally, I find that a pretty cool characterization for a fictional religious person.

Which is also sort of a hint that beneath her goofy exterior she's a thoughtful, deliberate person who doesn’t let anyone in by accident. Texas notes that they're exact opposites in this respect. She also has an extremely interesting relationship with the next person.

Her name comes from the Greek word for the order of angels in Christianity often translated as "Powers."

Mostima... where to start...? I guess first of all she’s a fallen angel, apparently because she pointed her gun at her own kind under MYSTERIOUS CIRCUMSTANCES. Probably related to the whole war in Kazdel thing, where many of the other MYSTERIOUS CIRCUMSTANCES in this game took place. Long story short, stuff happened in the war, she pointed her gun at another angel, Exusiai’s sister is dead under mysterious circumstances, and Mostima gave up her gun and now wanders the world delivering long-distance packages for PL. But that’s mostly an excuse for to be alone as much as humanly possible. She can also use time magic because I dunno why not. MYSTERIOUS.

She’s friendly enough, talkative even, and has a hobby of visiting new places and trying out the local food, etc, but her real defining trait is that she just doesn’t need other people. She’s explicitly aromantic, saying she has no interest in love, but she also has no need for friends or family or apparently coworkers either. Because of the way the world is, she spends most of her time driving through the endless wastelands between cities, with nothing but a truck, some packages, and her thoughts. There’s something... romantic about that (in the other sense of the word), but even she admits that the romance of watching the sun set in a desert with no one else around for hundreds of kilometers gets old after a while.

I feel like I should note that she has a very “best friend of her big sister” relationship with Exusiai, by which I mean she’s known Exusiai since Exusiai was a kid and to her Exusiai will always be that kid. Also Exusiai only joined PL in the first place to hunt her down and get answers about her sister’s death, but Mostima just laughs it off and leaves town for another year or five. 

Her name is probably a corruption of Mastema, a rather infamous fallen angel in mythology.

Croissant is... well, to be honest everyone past this point is more of a minor character. Which is actually a weird thing to say since none of these people are actually major characters in Arknights, but I guess these are less important people even within the group?

Croissant’s gimmick is that she’s always trying to make money by selling stuff. I guess she’s a merchant? But not, like, a formal one who runs a shop, she just gets her hands on stuff through her connections and sells it. But in like, a friendly down-to-earth way, it’s even said that she lives paycheck to paycheck. She’s a girl trying to get by with a second job, I guess is what I’m saying.

Team-wise, she’s the muscle of the group, being a minotaur and all. She lifts the heavy packages and also smashes things with her MAGNETIC HAMMER which I don’t know why I find that name so amusing. Gameplay-wise her special move can knock all the enemies around her halfway across the map and I smile every time she does it.

Her profile notes that she’s really just living her best life as a normal-ish person, and that helps make everyone around her feel normal, and that’s important in a setting where half the people around you are dying of magical cancer (no one in PL is Infected though).

Her name comes from the French word for Crescent and also a type of Pastry. Leaning more towards Pastries in my opinion.

Sora is an idol singer. Because, to be perfectly honest, what ragtag band of misfits is complete without an idol singer? She can’t really fight, but I guess Texas must have saved her life at some point or something because she bullied both her agency and PL into letting her work there part time. And also she is obsessed with Texas. I guess saying it like that makes her sound kind of annoying, but she really isn’t, she’s just an earnest girl chasing her dreams.

There’s also this interesting thing where a lot of her basic information is censored by her agency in order to protect her privacy (”do not dox the idol”). Even including her race. She presents as a wolf, but her promoted E2 art has her as a rabbit, which raises some interesting questions that don’t really get answered.

Her name comes from the Japanese word for Sky.

Lappland is not really part of PL, but she’s PL-adjacent enough to be worth mentioning here. Basically she’s an old acquaintance of Texas from back in their mafia days, and she’s obsessed with hunting her down and... fighting her? Killing her? But in, like, a sexual way? She’s kind of a crazy psychopathic killer. Maybe. She can also be very calm and polite when she wants to be, although with a taste for gallows humor. That just makes her scarier because you don’t know when/if she’ll snap.

There are two kind-of explanations for her being like that: A) her family is dead and she has no “pack”. As a wolf, the stress of living without a pack is supposed to be maddening. B) She’s infected with Oripathy (magic cancer) and there are crystals growing in her nervous system. Which... can’t be good. The answer is probably a combination of both.

But the most important thing about Lappland is her base skill and how it interacts with Texas. Basically, in your base there are various jobs you can assign people to and different characters get different bonuses for them. Most people in Penguin Logistics get bonuses for working the Trading Depot, for obvious reasons. Lappland gets a “bonus” where if she’s in the depot at the same time as Texas, she loses morale slower but doesn’t actually get any bonus to productivity. Meanwhile, Texas gets a bonus to productivity when Lappland is around, but loses morale way faster. In other words, Lappland is slacking off and making Texas so uncomfortable that she works twice as hard just to get the job over with so she can leave. This is their relationship as defined by game mechanics.

Texas also has another bonus where she loses morale slower if Exusiai is there, which completely cancels out the penalty she gets from Lappland. In other worlds, Exusiai being there too calms her nerves enough that she doesn’t feel the need to immediately escape.

Oh yeah, I forgot to talk about Emperor, who’s the owner of Penguin Logistics. He’s a world-famous rapper wearing a Tupac shirt and also literally immortal.

[strangeandforlornbooks]

best books with morally ambiguous narrators!

all y’all’s problematic faves and villains! :) also included are third person narrators but in books with morally ambiguous leads/themes 

Sci-fi

Scythe by Neal Shusterman: in a future free from pain, disease, and war, people can live forever. ‘scythes’ are given the power to decide who lives and who dies to preserve the balance. sad and kinda gives of hunger games vibes, if you like that.

Neuromancer by William Gibson: basically invented the cyberpunk genre. strange and removed protagonists. (a team of computer hackers have to face off against an evil AI). you kind of dislike everyone and suddenly you’re crying over them. one of those trippy sci-fi classics.

The Sirens of Titan by Kurt Vonnegut: very beautiful and very very sad (same author as slaughterhouse five). the richest man in america has to face a martian invasion. more about free will and bad people doing good things than a plot that makes any kind of sense.

The Man in the High Castle by Philip K Dick: set in an alternate universe where the germans and japanese won world war two. not really like the tv show at all- it’s not an action story, and there’s not really the hope to somehow fix the world that drives a lot of dystopia stories. instead its about how people survive and connect to one another in a hopeless society.

The Scorpion Rules by Erin Bow: a supercomputer convinces the leaders of the world to keep the peace for hundreds of years by taking their children hostage and obliterating any city that disobeys. what happens to the hostage protagonists when war seems inevitable? lots of morally fraught decisions and characters slowly losing their identity. (plus a fun lesbian romance)

Cryptonomicon by Neal Stephenson: a brilliant mathematician and a dedicated marine fight to keep the ultra secret in world war two. fifty years later,  a tech company discovers what remains of their story. one of the most memorable sequences in the book is a japanese soldier slowly becoming disillusioned with his nation and horrified by the war even as he continues to fight.

Blade Runner by Philip K. Dick: another one of those sci-fi classics that’s not at all like the movie. there is a bounty hunter for robots, though, as well as a weird religion that probably is referencing catholicism and a decaying society with a shortage of pets. kind of a trip.

Wilder Girls by Rory Power: girls trapped in a boarding school on an isolated island must face a creeping rot that affects the animals and plants on the island as well as their own bodies. the protagonists will do anything to survive and keep each other safe. very tense (and bonus lesbian romance whoo)

The Fifth Season by N K Jemisin: three women are gifted with the ability to control the earth’s energy in a world where those who can do so are forced into hiding or slavery. some veryyyy dark choices here but lots of strong female characters.

Historical Fiction

Fingersmith by Sarah Waters: two victorian lesbians fall in love as they plot to betray each other in horrific ways. lots of plot twists, plucky thieves, gothic settings, and a great romance.

Quo Vadis by Henryk Sienkiwicz: a powerful roman soldier in the time of Nero plots to kidnap a young woman after he falls in love with her, only to learn more about the mysterious christian religion she follows. very melodramatic but some terrific prose. 

All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr: a blind girl in France and a brilliant German boy recruited by the military struggle through the chaos of the second world war. ends with a bang (iykyk.) very sad, reads like poetry.

Boxers by Gene Luen Yang: graphic novel reveals the story of a young boy fighting in the boxer rebellion in early twentieth century china. the sequel, saints, is also excellent. beautifully and sympathetically shows the protagonist’s descent into evil- the reader really understands each step along the way.

Fantasy

Three Dark Crowns by Kendare Blake: three triplets separated at birth, each with their own magical powers, have to fight to the death to gain the throne. lots of fun honestly

Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo: everyone in these books is highly problematic but you love them all anyway. a ragtag game of criminals plan a heist on a magical fortress. some terrific tragic back stories, repressed feelings, and revenge schemes.

The Dark Tower series by Stephen King: idk how to describe these frankly but if you can put up with King’s appalling writing of female characters they’re pretty interesting. fantasy epic about saving the world/universe, sort of. cowboys and prophecies and overlapping dimensions and drug addicts galore.

The Amulet of Samarkand by Jonathan Stroud: lots of fun! a twelve year old decides to summon a demon for his cute lil revenge scheme. sarcastic demon narrator. lighthearted until s*** gets real suddenly.

Elegy and Swansong by Vale Aida: fantasy epic with machiavellian lesbians and enemies to lovers to enemies to ??? to lovers. charming and exciting and lovely characters.

The False Prince by Jennifer Nielsen: an orphan boy must compete with a few others for the chance to impersonate a dead prince. really dark but very tense and exciting and good twists.

The Grace of Kings by Ken Liu: fantasy epic. heroes overthrow an evil empire and then struggle as the revolution dissolves into warring factions. interesting world building and three dimensional characters, even if they only have a small part.

Circe by Madeline Miller: the story behind the witch who turns men into pigs in the odyssey. madeline miller really said, i just used my classics degree to write a beautiful gay love story and now im going to write a powerful feminist retelling because i can. queen. an amazing and satisfying book that kills me a lil bit because of the two lines referencing the song of achilles.

Heartless by Marissa Meyer: the tragic backstory for the queen of hearts in alice in wonderland. a little predictable but very fun with a compelling protagonist

A Song of Ice and Fire (Game of Thrones) by George RR Martin: ok I know we all hate GRRM and rightfully so but admittedly these books do have some great characters and great scenes. they deserve better than GRRM though. also he will probably never finish the books anyway....

A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket: not really fantasy but not really anything else either. plucky, intelligent, and kind children fight off evil plots for thirteen books until suddenly you realize the world is not nearly as black and white as you thought. 

Classics

Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier: gothic romance!! a new wife is curious about the mysterious death of her predecessor in a creepy old house in the British countryside...good twists and lovely prose.

A Separate Peace by John Knowles: not really morally ambiguous but one awful decision suddenly has awful consequences and certain people are haunted by guilt forever.... really really really beautiful and really really really sad. boys in a boarding school grow up together under the shadow of world war two.

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy: while imperial russia slowly decays a beautiful young woman begins a destructive affair. a long book. very russian. the ending is incredibly tense and well written.

Lord of the Flies by William Golding: I think you know the plot to this one. the prose is better than you remember and the last scene is always exciting.

And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie: one by one, the guests on an island are slowly picked off. one of Christie’s darkest mysteries- no happy ending here! very tense and great twists.

Contemporary

The Secret History by Donna Tartt: inspired the whole dark academia aesthetic. college students get a little too into ancient greece and it does not end very well. lovely prose but I found the characters unlikable.

Honorable Mentions

The Dublin Saga by Edward Rutherford: has literally a billion protagonists, but some of them are morally ambiguous ig? follows a few families stories’ from the 400s ad to irish independence in the 20s. beautifully captures the weight and movement of irish history.

Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfer: how morally ambiguous can you be if you’re, like, eleven? a lot if you’re a criminal genius who wants to kidnap a fairy for your evil-ish plan apparently!

Redemption by Leon Uris: literally my favorite novel ever. the sequel to Trinity but can stand alone. various irish families struggle through the horrors of world war one. the hero isn’t really morally ambiguous, but the main theme of the novel is extremely bad people suddenly questioning their choices and eventually redeeming themselves. sweeping themes of love, screwed up families, redemption, and patriotism.

The Lymond Chronicles and House of Niccolo by Dorothy Dunnett: heroes redeem themselves/try to get rich/try to save their country in early renaissance Europe. if I actually knew what happened in these books I'm sure it would be morally ambiguous but its too confusing for me. in each book you spend at least a third convinced the protagonist is evil, though. lots of exciting sword fights, tragic romances, plot twists, and kicking english butt.

Bonus: Protagonist is less morally ambiguous and more very screwed up and sad all the time

The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt: you know this one bc its quoted in all those quote compilations. basically the story of how one horrible event traumatizes a young man and how he develops a connection to a painting. really really really good.

Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro: hard to describe but strange... not an action novel or a dystopia really but sort of along those lines. very hopeless.

[kalboykiyay]

At Ease

So, I wrote this as a birthday present to myself. I don’t remember half of what I typed and as per usual, I didn’t check for grammar or spelling errors. I’m pretty sure that this fic falls into the Sharp Cheddar Gang because I refuse to give up my romance.

A couple of things to mention, as with all of the pre-Warriors fics, I must mention that this takes place before Cowboy gets his Stetson (Jeez, I should probably organise these fics chronologically, huh?) and I headcanon his pre-Cowboy name to be Harris. Also, the character Adelay doesn’t speak, so she communicates mostly in ASL, and I’ve done my best to italicise her dialogue. though, I hope you enjoy this and constructive criticism is appreciated.

If there was one thing Harris knew about A.J., it was how easily she flustered whenever she was uncomfortable, or startled, or embarrassed, and that didn’t take much. Adelay gave her a light-hearted hug last week, and her face immediately turned bright red. Of all of the members of their friend group, she seemed most comfortable with Adelay, having known her in middle school, but there wasn’t much difference in how she acted toward her overall. He couldn’t tell if she despised affection or if she just didn’t like being touched. She was nice enough to everyone, but it was obvious she still felt outta place within the group, despite them all having been friends for the better part of a year at this point. 

So, it came as a surprise to him when she agreed to go to the festival they were having at the beach that Saturday.

“I have nothing to do on Saturday, so sure why not? I’d love to go. Of course, I would have to ask Nikola, but I’m sure he’d be alright with it.” She was distracted by something, so she didn’t catch his surprised expression.

“Alright. Cool. We’re all meeting up at Juka’s house that afternoon. Do you know how to get there?”

“Yep. It’s on the way to my house actually.” She grabbed her bag off the table. “I’ll see you then.”

“Yeah, see you then.” He said, watching her walk out the door, suppressing his urge to smile. 

 -----

“You sure she’s actually gonna show? I’m still surprised she actually agreed to comin’ today.” Noah said as he flopped down on the couch and put his feet up, before opening up a bag of chips.

“I hope she wouldn’t bail. She doesn’t seem the type,” Harris said. “It seems like she might at least let someone know unless it was an emergency or she couldn’t reach them.”

“I’m pretty sure she would say something,” Juka said walking back into the room. “Noah, get your feet off the couch!”

Noah moved his feet back onto the floor. “Alright, don’t kill me,” 

There was a knock at the door which Juka went to answer. Noah put his feet back up out of spite. “You get my feet of the stupid couch.” He mumbled under his breath, causing him and Harris to burst out laughing. 

He put them back down when she started walking back, A.J. and Adelay in tow. “We can leave in a moment, I just realised that I don’t have any flowers, I’m gonna grab some,” She said before turning back to Noah. “Don’t put your feet back on my couch.”

“Juke, I’m hurt that you think I would do such a thing! You’ve got nothing to worry about!” 

“Yuh huh.” She headed upstairs and the moment she was gone, he put his feet back up for a moment, causing A.J. to laugh slightly. 

“You’re gonna get yourself into some serious trouble!” She told him. 

 “Nah, she don’t mean it. She don’t care as much as she acts like.”

“I get the feeling she’ll kill you just because she can,” Adelay signed, “I mean, she’ll say it’s because your feet are on the couch, but this stems deeper than that.”

Noah was about to reply when Juka walked back in the room. “Let’s go, children.”

“Yes, Mom.” Adelay got up off the floor immediately. “Finally, we can leave since Juka started moving her ass.” 

“Hey, I saw that!” Juka called out as Adelay went outside, the rest of the group following.

-----

The walk to the beach went by quickly; everyone making conversation on the way. 

“Hey, A.J. You ever been here before?” Noah asked her.

“To the beach?”

“To the festival.”

“Eh... Nikola used to take me when I was younger, but I haven’t been in years.”

“Any real reason?” 

“He works a lot these days, so we don’t go much anymore. Plus, I rarely have time to go, because of my schedule.” She shrugged. “This is the first time I’ve been able to go in years. Do you all go a lot?” 

“My parents usually take me and Harris, or sometimes his dad will take us, but my parents are out of town, and I think his dad is workin’,” Juka explained, to which Harris nodded.

The beach was pretty crowded, so they knew that the lines to get food would be very long. There were people and tents everywhere, if there were any more people, someone could easily get lost in the crowd. “It’s way more crowded than it usually is… I think there was half this amount last year and the year before.” Harris looked around at the crowd, “You can barely see the sand anywhere.”

“Yeah, it’s almost annoying. Though I did hear a lot of the other kids at school mention that they were going, so it wouldn’t surprise me if it’s just a bunch of high school kids here... I want some caramel corn. Anybody willing to walk over to the stand that sells it with me?” Adelay queried, moving out of the way of an oncoming group of kids. 

“Yeah sure, I’ll go.” Harris said.

“Do you think they’ll sell kettle corn?” A.J. asked, her voice quiet, though it was likely because it was already so loud at the beach.

He thought for a moment. “I don’t see why they wouldn’t. Come on. Juka? Noah? You two comin’?” He asked, looking back at the pair.

“No thanks. Be careful not to get lost!” Juka told them.

“I’m gonna hang back too,” Noah agreed as the three walked off to find the stand.

The three made their way through the crowd, not seeing the popcorn stand anywhere. “You sure it’s this way, Elle?” Harris questioned with a raised brow. “I can’t see over anybody.” 

Adelay gave him a shrug in response.

“Did you see it, A.J.?” Harris turned to look at her, or at least turned to look at where she was before. “A.J.?” He looked around him but she was nowhere to be found, “Oh, shit. Elle, we lost A.J.!” 

Adelay looked at him before looking around. "That's not good. Come on." 

The two walked through the crowd, Adelay grabbing his hand so that they wouldn't get separated. They searched everywhere, behind the tents, near the stage the band was using, and around the restrooms. Their clothes and faces were covered in sweat. Adelay said she needed to go to the restroom anyhow, so  Harris waited for her.

Harris found himself getting frustrated with the ordeal. Anything could've happened to her. We didn't even notice she was gone. What if she got trampled by the crowd or something?" He pushed that thought from his mind. He wasn't fond of the idea that she had gotten herself hurt, or any of the people he cared about getting hurt for that matter. Then, he noticed something out of the corner of his eye. He turned to it, and sure enough, it was a smaller person wearing a maroon Cordovan hat.

"A.J.!" He tried waving to get her attention. A.J. turned around upon hearing her name, trying to navigate the crowd. When she turned, Harris let out a sigh of relief. Once she got closer, it was apparent that she had found the popcorn stand, carrying two bags of kettle corn and one bag of caramel corn.

"Where did you guys go? I told you where the stand was! It wasn't-" Before she could finish her sentence, Harris gave her a tight hug, almost without thinking. She froze, shocked for a moment before trying her best to hug him back. The back of his head touched her face and she knew her face would start turning red any moment. Despite this she felt comfortable in the embrace in a way she couldn’t put into words if she tried. The pair released each other; her face now slightly reddened, though it was more prominent on the cheek that his head had touched. Adelay walked out a moment later.

“A.J.! Where were you? You know how worried we were about you?”

 A.J. simply handed the caramel corn to her. "I bought you this."

"How much did this cost?" Adelay wondered, looking at the bag.

"Don't worry about it. Consider it a gift." A.J. smiled.

"What's the second bag for?" Harris asked.

"This is for Nikola. He loves kettle corn a lot. The first bag is for everyone here, so you're welcome to have some."

The three returned to the table; Juka and Noah not noticing them return. “Damn, how long was that line?” Noah looked at them with a confused expression. 

“It wasn’t that long, surprisingly, not that these two would have any idea,” A.J. said with an amused look. “They got lost. I bought three bags of popcorn, because if you buy two, they give  you a third one for half the price, so I got one for Nik!” She said holding up her bags with a bright smile.

“I specifically told you all not to get lost!” Juka gave them a look. 

“We didn’t get lost. We lost A.J.!” Harris responded. 

“Well, I wasn’t lost. I actually found what we were looking for.” She looked at him, shaking her bags to prove her point.

Juka chuckled softly. “Yeah, alright. Let’s hurry up and see if we can’t get a good spot. I kinda actually want to go watch them perform.” She stood up. ”Can I have some of that caramel corn?” 

Adelay opened her bag and allowed Juka to take a small handful out. The group then headed over to the area where the band was performing as the evening sky set in. Noah kept stopping to buy snacks along the way.

“This thing comes around once a year, and I like festival snacks, so I’m buying everything and you can’t stop me.” he said, stuffing another candy box into his backpack. There’s something missing though…” He looked around before he found the tent he was looking for, “Oooh… Hey, I’ll catch up with ya later, bye!” 

“Wh- Noah?!” Juka called after him. “Only this kid! I get the feeling he needs to be supervised.”  

“Nah, he’ll be fine! Let’s go.” Harris turned back to the area where the band would be performing, the other three following behind.

They stood watching the band perform an upbeat song, everyone around moving their feet or waving their hands and generally having a good time. Even A.J. seemed to be getting into it, her hand on her hat to keep it from falling off as she danced with Adelay she shook the bags of kettle corn with the other. 

Juka and Harris laughed at her energy. Harris leaned over to her, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say that’s a totally different person from the person who showed up with us. Maybe we still haven’t found her yet.” 

“Maybe, her voice does seem a bit deeper than earlier!” Juka shot back as Noah walked up with an ice cream cone. “Found you and it was definitely worth it to go back. I have ice cream.”

Juka looked at him incredulously, “You found an ice cream stand and didn’t say anything? Take me to it! Please.”

Noah feigned annoyance. “Alright alright! Harris, you comin’?”

“Yeah, I’m down for some ice cream.”

“Elle! A.J.! You guys want to go get some ice cream?” The two in question turned to the trio.

Adelay’s face lit up. “Yes, always!” She ran up to the others in anticipation.

“No, thanks! I’ll watch the band and save our spot!” A.J replied, turning back to watch the band. 

“Alright, let’s move!” The other three laughed and started walking.

Harris looked back at A.J. briefly. She stood watching the performance, her right hand hanging onto her bags of kettle corn  “On second thought… I should stay… We probably shouldn’t leave anybody by themselves, right?”

“Oh, good point. I’ll bring you back a cone, You want chocolate-vanilla swirl, right?”

“Yeah. Thanks, Noah!” He said as he made his way back to where they’d left A.J. She’d been so busy watching the band, she hadn’t noticed that he’d come back. “Hey!”

She looked mildly surprised at his return, but she didn’t seem upset by it. “I thought you went with the others to get ice cream.”

“I changed my mind. Noah’s getting me some. I didn’t want to leave you by yourself.”

“I mean you could’ve. I wouldn’t have cared much.” She said, fixing her glasses.

“I’m assumin’ you don’t want the company then?”

“It’s not about that. The company is nice, and I’m grateful that I have it. I’m just used to not having it, so I’ve grown accustomed to not complaining about it, and I learned not to ask for it. It’s easiest to distance myself rather than constantly needing company.” She tilted her head slightly, as if in thought.

Harris didn’t have a response for that, but he didn’t like the empty feeling it gave him. He couldn’t imagine not being able to hang out with his friends, or just refusing to ask people to hang out. He couldn’t count how many times he’d call Juka to ask her to come over when they were younger, but for him to just not spend time with her... It sounded… lonely. He thought about what he could say next, then he found what he thought was the best response, but it could just as easily be the worst one if the implication upset her. “Well, I can’t speak for the others because they’re usually pretty busy, but I wouldn’t mind if you called me up to go have fun sometimes.”

She looked at him for the first time in their conversation, a bit taken aback. “I’d be on board with that.” Despite her initial expression, Harris didn’t miss the way her face lit up afterward. She looked back at the band.

Harris noticed it then. She wasn’t flushing. In fact, her face was pale as ever, not even showing any signs that she could be the least bit uneasy.

‘Well, I don’t only turn red when I’m flustered or uncomfortable. I have sensitive skin, it turns red at anything touching it. Plus, I’m fairly pale, so naturally I’m more prone to getting red skin pretty easily.” He must’ve had a confused expression because she clarified. “You said that aloud.” To which he gave a hum of satisfaction. Thinking about it, when they stopped hugging earlier, her face was slightly redder on one side than the other. He hadn’t paid much mind to it though.

“Not sure why I’d be flustered though. I don’t feel uncomfortable around you. If anything, I feel more comfortable with you and Adelay than most people. You’re easy to talk to and your naturally relaxed and cheerful demeanour makes you a fun person to be around. It’s relaxing; it’s like… letting go of tension I didn’t know I had.” 

Harris turned away from her, feeling his own face start to heat up. He didn’t know what he expected her to say, but he certainly knew that it wasn’t that. He couldn’t come up with a response, but A.J. didn’t seem to mind and he was grateful that she didn’t notice his face turning red, or maybe she just didn’t care. After his face returned to normal he looked at the band again, enjoying the comfortable silence that listening to the music brought. He felt a slight warmth near his right hand, looking down and noticing that A.J.’s hand was close to his own. He couldn’t tell if she moved her hand closer on purpose or not, but he didn’t know if he wanted to question it. He grabbed her hand gently, causing her to look down at it, before interlocking their fingers in response and looking back up at the band. He’d taken her hand before, but it was different this time and both of them were aware of it. For all they knew, it could’ve been a reaction for the moment and they’d never speak of it again. Of course, neither of them wanted that to be the case.

-----

Juka, Noah, and Adelay were finally heading back to where Harris and A.J. were. “Man, everyone wants ice right now. Do people really eat ice cream at night?” Noah asked, taking a lick from his cone.

Juka looked at him, dumbfounded. “Noah, is that an actual question?”

“Yeah, why?”

Juka and Adelay shared a look. Trying to keep from bursting into laughter and just as Juka was about to explain, Noah realised.

“Oh, wait! That’s a stupid question! And now I don’t even remember what I was trying to ask!” He sighed as the two girls covered their mouths with their hands. “Anyways! I hope they’re doing okay.”

“I’m sure, they’re fine. I don’t think they’d get into too much-” Juka looked over, noticing where they were standing, immediately noticing their interlocked hands. “Trouble…” Noah and Adelay followed her gaze. 

“Huh. I wouldn’t have picked up on that.” Noah said, walking towards them. “Harris, I got your ice cream! Be careful, it started melting on the way here, sorry.” 

Harris and A.J. turned around; Harris taking the ice cream cone with a grateful smile.

Adelay walked up soon after, the four immediately making conversation.

Juka hung back a bit, shaking her head in amusement. “Lookin’ back, I really shoulda seen this comin’.” she laughed before joining the group.

[thejustmaiden]

I'm not against SessRin as the ship itself, rather I'm against the idea of it being canon. I wouldn't even care if InuYasha was of a more mature genre. Yes, the trope is very popular even in hentai, yaoi and yuri. However, all of these genres are explicitly for adults - the type of audience that are well capable of seperating between fiction and real life, knowing what's wrong and right. Yasahime's still cleary targeted at a younger audience - kids that can still be easily affected by fiction.

Hey, nonnie! I really appreciate the ask. Apologies for the slight delay. 😊

I read what you had to say, and I think you bring up a very valid point that I don't see being discussed enough quite honestly.

Because you're right, Inuyasha is geared towards a younger audience. That explains why it was the very first anime for many of us growing up.

Ironically enough, some of you who like me stayed up late to catch it on TV remember that Inuyasha came out on a network called "Adult Swim" of all things. haha (I gather that had more to do with the occasional foul language than anything else.) Cartoon Network- what Adult Swim is known as during the daytime- shows children's programs and Inuyasha wouldn't have been exactly appropriate on there either.

Now let's take a quick look at the other anime shows I remember that would come out on the line-up along with Inuyasha. Cowboy Bepop and Ghost in the Shell are the first two that come to memory. If you aren't familiar with those, readers, I encourage you to look them up and see how they're described in comparison to Inuyasha. They both tackle some pretty dark and heavy adult themes. Inuyasha, on the other hand, is based off a shonen manga aimed at young teens, boys specifically.

I'm not personally familiar with the yaoi and yuri genres myself, but from what I do know, a lot of their stories center around sexual romance and homoeroticism. Inuyasha may include some romance, but by no means does the author insert explicitly sexual elements into her story. Fans who are mature to handle that kind of content can if they so choose to-- bring on the fan fiction and fan art! But can the series itself be justified in doing so? Well, I hope not since the average Inuyasha viewer is only just a teenager.

You're correct, fiction is capable of influencing and shaping how some kids learn to view and make sense of certain events. I'm going to give you a real life example here. Keep in mind, readers, that this is an extreme case that obviously wouldn't apply to everyone or every situation. The purpose of recounting this tale is to demonstrate that young minds are more vulnerable to the influences around them, be them real or imagined.

Years ago there used to be this internet urban legend called "The Slender Man." In 2014, these two 12-year old girls (so roughly the same age many of us started watching Inuyasha) became obsessed with this fictional character and wanted to prove to everyone he existed. In order to do that, they made up their minds to kill one of their classmates to please him. They ended up stabbing the victim numerous times, but she somehow miraculously survived. The two girls who were found guilty of this crime ended up being admitted into mental health institutions. Please feel free to read up more on this yourself. It sounds creepy, I know, but how the community came together to support the victim and her recovery was a touching ending to such a horrific story.

Like I already mentioned, this was an extreme case that almost resulted in murder. Death, however, isn't the only bad outcome that can occur. Child abuse in all its complex forms is a serious outcome, too. It should go without saying that no child watching Inuyasha should accept the idea of a young girl (like themselves but maybe younger) being pursued later once she's "old enough" by the same male authority figure who was her main protector during their travels. You could tell Rin felt legitimately safe and happy for the first time in a long time while in his company. I also like to wonder if that's because Sesshomaru reminded her of someone she knew before her family was killed. But who really knows? After all, kids are very trusting by nature. Let's be honest, the happy-go-lucky Rin would've followed just about anyone who saved her! It just happened to be Sesshomaru, which of course I'm grateful for. So tell me again, why does this protector-ward dynamic they've got going on need to turn romantic?

Seriously, why are viewers expecting a romance to happen anyway? It's not like we have been given any solid indication to suggest that these two are destined for it. Allow me to explain why I believe that is. Sessrin fans anticipate a romance in their future despite the lack of foreshadowing, because this trope IS popular. (But only in series geared towards adults- like you said, nonnie.) In other words, it's been so engrained in our minds that it's a completely normal direction we should come to expect a relationship between an older man and a young girl/woman to take. So even though it hasn't been hinted at much if at all, it's apparently bound to happen regardless.

A young woman who decides to be with an older man isn't the issue here, BUT there's a fine line and at times the stories we tell will tread that line and test its boundaries. Case in point: shipping Sesshomaru with "Adult Rin" although we've only met and gotten to know her as a young girl up until now. In many instances, adult!Rin supposedly only has to mean she's old enough to bear children. If it was the norm for a girl to have kids at 15 or 16 in Feudal Japan, then that must mean we should not only tolerate it but celebrate it too, right?

Yes, fiction is a creative outlet to explore and push the boundaries from time to time, but we must be careful of what messages we're sending and who the target audience is. Would it really be wise to portray in a positive light a teenage girl getting pregnant with one of the people who helped raised her's babies on a show for teens? That's not my idea of a wholesome family lesson I'd ever want to teach my kids or have them learn elsewhere.

What we're essentially doing is telling the young Inuyasha viewers that it's totally normal to sexualize and romanticize a young girl's future without her say. That it's okay to speak for her and decide that's what her character would want even if we haven't met this adult version of her yet. What about Rin's hopes and dreams? How about we wait to see how she is as a grown-up first before we come to such big conclusions. Wouldn't you say you're jumping the gun a bit, shippers?

Nobody is saying you can't picture it, alright, but to claim it's the only obvious progression- because evidently there must be one for some reason?- of the relationship Rin's formed with Sesshomaru is absolutely absurd. If that's the case, then basically all the other "who's Sesshomaru's baby mama" theories are just as plausible as yours if not more so.

Also, guys, we really ought to stop stating that Sesshomaru will never have the capacity to care for another human being besides Rin like it's a fact. I'm aware that to many the appeal of this ship is that she was the first one to break through that icy exterior of his, so that must translate to a love that transcends and what not. If she wasn't a child he guarded like his own first and foremost, then this ship could have potential. That's not the case though, so moving right along!

Right, so who says his affection towards humans has to stop at Rin? Why can't the mom- if there is a mom- be some new character? That's really not reaching- yes, even for Sesshomaru. Knowing Rin, she's probably the one who introduced them! Plus, it's not like we don't have other canon sources that already show us Sesshomaru coming to the aid of humans. He has saved and protected Kagome on a few occasions that we know of so far, as well as Kohaku. And no, he didn't just protect him because Rin asked him to. Perhaps that was why he did at first, but please give Sesshomaru credit where credit is due. He is not the cold heartless demon we once believed him to be. How else do you think he is capable of activating Tenseiga's powers? Yeah, no, Sesshomaru grew to care for that kid, and Kokahu wouldn't have stuck around him for as long as he did if he didn't believe Sesshomaru didn't have his best interests at heart. Well, in Sesshomaru's own special little way that is. 😆

I got a little sidetracked- my bad! I suppose it's all relevant when you think about it. Alrighty, nonnie, I hope I adressed your ask the way you wanted. Please feel free to drop by again! 🖖

Reminder: Do not plan to engage in discourse on this blog if you are going to be disrespectful. The views I'm expressing aren't "an attack," so there's no need to get defensive and aggressive. I've even had a few Sessrin shippers themselves tell me I make valid points and that I do it in an upright manner. So if you don't believe me, then maybe you'll believe them. Thank you!

[stockwellarchives]

Have you watched all the “must-watch” picks and want to see more? Want to have more fun watching his stuff? This list is what I’d consider good or fun to watch, but not great. The catch is, either I only like certain aspects of the film/episode or I don’t think it’d be everyone’s cup of tea.

List below cut:

Home Sweet Homicide: the other comedy Stockwell did as a child. It’s pretty fun to watch, but the humor is way more in the dialogue and doesn’t have a mix of physical comedy like The Happy Years does. 

Deep Waters: I think the shots of Maine in this film are gorgeous. Also, Stockwell played quite a few orphans or misfit children as a child, and this is one such role. And as usual for many films from his childhood, the focus is more on the grownups than on his character.

Cattle Drive: Stockwell plays a little shit in this movie, and it’s great. He’s this spoiled rich kid who accidentally spends too much time away from the train, and ends up traveling with a bunch of cowboys for a while, learning not to be so spoiled along the way. I’ve seen it described as a Western version of Captains Courageous- it’s a shallow plot, but it’s fun.

Any of his Wagon Train episodes: Stockwell delivers some pretty good performances in all four of them, including a pre-Compulsion episode which is impressive. In particular, look for “The Will Santee Story,” since that’s the only thing he starred in with his then-wife, Millie Perkins, and I think that’s the best of the four.

Sons and Lovers: Stockwell loves D. H. Lawrence and was willing to be paid less than usual since he also loved the book this movie was based on. Also, for fun, you can see him play another Oedipal role pre-Battlestar Galactica.

Alfred Hitchcock Presents “The Landlady”: Glasses! Stockwell almost never wore them in roles when he was young, so this is a rare treat. I also like the Roald Dahl short story this was based on.

Dick Powell Show “The Geetas Box”: This was a pretty silly episode (sure, knock out the vault guys just to steal their truck and break in), but it’s a fun one to watch.

The Twilight Zone "A Quality of Mercy": Stockwell is fine in this. Let’s get that out of the way. What’s not fine is the yellowface part. Controversy addressed, it’s also interesting to see him sort of Quantum Leap long before playing Al.

Burke's Law (1960s) "Who Killed Lenore Wingfield?" Stockwell is only in a few scenes, but he’s playing a comedic role- a pre-1980s rarity, even if his character’s an idiot. This one is harder to find, unfortunately.

Rapture: Do you want to see a young Dean Stockwell soaking wet and vulnerable in the rain? Do you want to see him looking extremely pretty? Are you willing to overlook that he’s befriending and romancing a teenage girl even though he’s in his late 20s? Then you should go watch this!

The Dunwich Horror (1970): This movie is terrible, but I love it for Stockwell’s performance. Being a Lovecraft fanboy, he went all out for his performance. He had an artist friend paint on him, taking four hours, for one scene and copied some occult gestures from another friend, just for this movie. Beware: do not, I repeat, DO NOT watch the 2009 version. I regretted it.

The Werewolf of Washington: Another “bad movie, good Dean Stockwell.” The director had no idea what he was doing, but Stockwell dedicated himself to his role and it absolutely shows. 

Tracks: I group this, Human Highway and Crash together as “the plot is meh-to-weird, but you get to see Dean Stockwell hanging out with his friends, and it’s really different and/or something else compared to anything else he’s been in.” Well, Crash isn’t that different, but Tracks is still the best thing he’s been in with his best friend Dennis Hopper, other than Blue Velvet.

Greatest Heroes of the Bible "Daniel in the Lions' Den": I’m not going to lie. I love this for Stockwell’s costume, and the extra glittery black costume alone. That is all. (Plus he gets fed to a lion!)

Banzai Runner: Stockwell plays a rare leading man role, and he’s great as the cop who chases down banzai runners drag-racing down the highway (which was apparently a legit issue in early 1980s California).

Nowhere Man "You Really Got a Hold on Me": Stockwell basically takes over the episode. His character is a more cynical version of Al, but he’s great to watch.

Max Rose: Stockwell’s character is hinted at throughout the movie, and he has one scene towards the end that he’s really good in. Otherwise, the movie overall isn’t as good.

If you’ve seen and liked “Annabel” and/or “The Programming of Charlie Blake,” here’s more disturbed roles Stockwell was good in:

Johnny Staccato “Nature of the Night”

Checkmate “The Cyanide Touch”: Stockwell seems more on the edge of disturbed in this one, but it’s still fun.

Paper Man: It’s a computer-centric science fiction horror movie. Not bad for 1971!

The F.B.I. "End of a Nightmare": Stockwell’s character is a little silly in the beginning, but he’s great at the end. 

The Twilight Zone "Room 2426"

Stargate SG-1 "Shadow Play"