#also also i love your klav comments

[ilatians]

having not played passed aa 2-3 i dont know a ton about some of these lawyers yet and Athena Cykes being the strongest is making me WHEEZE i have absolutely no context but I’m inclined to believe you because girl looks RIPPED

Ace Attorney Lawyers Ranked By Their Abilities in Physical Combat

Winston Payne: I’m pretty sure the average Tumblr user could kill Winston Payne with their bare hands.

Sebastian DeBeste: Look, the only reason why this wimp ranks higher than Payne is because he is so sopping wet pathetic that there is a significant chance that his opponent will just start feeling bad about kicking his ass and punch themself in the face instead.

Klavier Gavin: While Klavier is a physically fit young man who is known to keep his cool in extreme situations, he is also a giant law-abiding nerd who has never thrown a punch at anything that isn’t an inanimate wall. It probably wouldn’t be that hard to shove this guy into a locker.

Miles Edgeworth: Look, Miles is an even bigger locker-worthy nerd than Klavier. Anytime anyone, friend or foe, suggests a violent solution he just gets freaked out and begs for them to follow procedures. And no AA Lawyer is more easily thrown off his rhythm and startled than he is. He might have some bulk under the magenta and frills (or at least some impressive leg muscles from climbing 12 flights of stairs every day for like seven years), but he has no idea or will to actually use them in a fight. However, he did try and stare down a man who was aiming a gun at his back that one time and managed to keep his cool throughout all of this.

So like, he’d probably talk a big game and try and intimidate his opponent into not engaging - but if that won’t work he will get his ass thoroughly whooped. And then he’d try to sue them, which is what his threats were about all along.

Apollo Justice: Actually a considerable step up in power-levels from the previous ones. Apollo might be smol, but he is Done With Your Shit and this gives him Strength. Not to mention that one time he successfully tanked an explosion. His famous Chords of Steel can also serve as a tactic to confuse or weaken his enemies.

Kristoph Gavin: Although he is primarily known for his schemes and poisoning, he did kill a man with a single blow to the forehead with a bottle, showing he does have some decent upper-body-strength to use in a fight. And being known as ‘the Coolest Defense in the West’ means he can keep his calm even during hectic combat. But he’s also very pretentious and his constant pontifications might just be the perfect opportunity for someone to smash his face in.

Blaise Debeste: Okay, look, is Blaise a scary tall man who successfully stabbed a woman to death with a candelabra and constantly carries around a deceptively-powerful lighter and has like, implied, motorcycle gang background? Yes. But also I think anyone who encounters Blaise Debeste face-to-face is overcome with such bloodlust rage that it might give them an edge in the battle against him.

Mia Fey: Mia ranks fairly high on the Battle Scale considering the one time she was faced with a violent altercation she just tried to escape and it… didn’t end well.

However, in the two times we get to play as her it’s also clear that she wants to Punch. All of the Things. While Apollo is fueled by being Done With Your Shit, Mia has righteous anger - so I think in a situation where she is actually prepared to do battle she would be able to throw a few decent punches. Also assuming we are talking about Mia while she was still alive, there’s also her Spirit Channeling powers to account for. While we’ve never seen them on screen, Maya told us they are “first rate” and I believe her. Maybe she could channel the spirit of a great warrior to try and get an edge in combat?

Manfred Von Karma: While he also has the same Bloodlust-Inducing-Factor as Blaise, and he does seem less physically fit even though they’re about the same age - I feel like his cane could do more serious damage than Blaise’s lighter. And he has that dangerous fucking Stun Gun on him to easily neutralize opponents. Plus, he did tank that one gunshot he got in the shoulder. Manfred’s opponents might have Rage on their side, but also you cannot underestimate the power of his sheer Spite.

Godot: On one hand, Godot has shown an ability to keep his cool in very dangerous situations. He can smash a coffee cup with his bare hands and barely react, showing that he’s decently strong and resilient to pain. And he is yet another proud (?) member of the exclusive “Lawyers With a Body Count Club”. And while stabbing a waifish, 155cm college student (and part time-poisoner) in the back isn’t exactly the most epic demonstration of battle prowess in the history of Anime Lawyers - he did it (and moved the body and doctored the crime scene and prosecuted in court) while tanking a knife slash in his face, showing his pain-resilience once again, as well as general tenacity that would also be useful in battle. Also, he can summon an infinite amount of hot coffee mugs at will, which must make for a decent improvised long-ranged attack.

On the other hand, his health is also heavily implied to be deteriorating and that he’s basically dying over the course of the final case… possibly due to all of that physical exhaustion. If a fight goes longer than just a single backstab, I feel like these health complications are gonna harm Godot’s performance.

Phoenix Wright: Okay, so this is actually the hardest one to place. I keep flip-flopping on where to put him, especially compared to Mia, and Apollo. Because unlike most other lawyers currently ranked below him, he is a disaster when it comes to being on the offensive; Phoenix Wright is a total wimp who has never returned a punch in his life. However, he is also almost supernaturally durable, unbelievably lucky and deceptively strong. If a solid iron door, a raging freezing river and a speeding car didn’t manage to take him down, what chance does a fellow human, even a more combat-capable one, have???

Calisto Yew: She’s not even a real-lawyer! She’s a Secret Spy who successfully pretended to be a Lawyer for years! She’s got a gun, she’s got a knife, she's got crossbow bolt as hair decorations, she probably has some combat training from her time in Interpol… While she’s clearly more specialized for espionage and infiltration, and not as physically strong as Lang, she’s still got an impressive advantage over most of the regular people who went to Law School. In fact, her skill with barefaced lies and manipulation might also be a skill she could use in a fight to catch her opponent off-guard.

Nahyuta Sahdmadhi: Nahyuta is, in fact, one of the few AA Lawyers to canonically participate in what I would unambiguously call a ‘fight’ (rather than a ‘murder’), when he single-handedly disarmed and apprehended a Defiant Dragon rebel in the sorta-canon ‘Spirit of Justice’ Prologue video.

Like, that rebel guy probably isn't the world's greatest warrior, but the Defiant Dragons have been around for enough time to give their members at least some basic self-defense/combat skills… more so than the average lawyer on this list at minimum. And Nahyuta very easily crab-stomped him. Showing that he has strong nerves, some amazing reflexes and the martial art skills to knock a man unconscious with a single blow. Not to mention the seemingly supernatural skills with his prayer beads, which he already uses as a sort of ‘weapon’ in court. Also that... thing he did to Apollo's bracelet that one time.

Nahyuta might be just straight-up Magic, that's pretty OP.

Franziska von Karma: Look, Franziska might not have official martial-arts, guns, or Literal Magic Powers - but what she does have is sheer determination and force or personality. Franziska von Karma has been intimidating grown men since she was a 149 cm tall 13 years old with a riding crop (I mean, one of those men was Miles, but still…..). She had once whipped Phoenix Wright into unconsciousness in a temper tantrum, and like I already mentioned that taking him down is quite a feat. She is also very resilient - while the shot to her shoulders was designed not to kill her, being up back on her feet doing investigation stuff a day after is still very impressive! Her whip might not be as dangerous as a sword or a gun, but she will not relent until she defeats you.

Simon Blackquill: Let me just give it to you straight, Simon Blackquill is 1.88 meter tall, he owns a katana and a trained attack-hawk (giving him both short range and far range advantage), he can break solid metal chains with his bare hands, he can cut your hair halfway across the room with a feather. Not to mention how he could probably use the whole psychological manipulation in battle to intimidate or goad his enemy. There’s not even a lot of funny or interesting points to bring up, he is literally an action movie character who just happens to also be a lawyer.

Athena Cykes: Athena Cykes is the strongest lawyer. One day, she’ll be stronger than whales. I believe in her.

[journalsouppe]

APOLLO JUSTICE!!!!! AHHHHHH!!!! What i would literally give to have a true AA4 sequel. I wholeheartedly believe if Yamazaki's team could ignore aa4 canon to make 5 & 6 then Shu Takumi should absolutely be allowed to ignore any 5&6 canon to make an aa4 sequel. I'm dying out here pleaseeeeee

The Phoenix sticker is from Peachcott. The Klavier sticker is from Ayabit from the Turnabout Cinema zine. The Apollo and Trucy stickers are from astarsor.

Writing typed below!

rating: 9.8 played: Fa 2023 port: 3DS favorite? Y replayable: Y recommend? Y series: Ace Attorney

Comments

THE JUDGE PAINTING

apollo's such a dork <3

ooo i like the perceive function

i love the music

DONT SAY THAT TRUCY T_T

there's so much going on in this investigation

wow i love how uneasy i feel even after the trial ended

LMAO I FORGOT ABOUT THE PHOENIX SEX PHOTO

i dont think y'all want your panties back...

klav's a bill and ted fan i see lol

LOVE mr eldoon's design 10/10

klapollo meet cute moment LMAO

oops ^^; i accidentally wrote a 600 word essay about the first case

i like how apollo cried over trucy

IT'S JUSTICE TIME??? T^T

i like klavier's hands a normal amount

alita must have some dirty fucking feet

the animations are so smooth

apollo being jealous of klavier at the concert and thinking he's cool LMAO

apollo is WHIPPED

trucy is KILLING it in court, she really is nick's daughter

klavier's shoe print *skull emoji*

out of pocket shiny forehead comment LMAO

lamiroir has similar vocal tones as malon!

THE PENIS FIRE AND KLAV PUTTING IT OUT IN THE BKGD

the smile and hair twirl klavier LMAO

why am i doing this music recording thing T^T

i dont like looking at daryan T_T

letouse kazuma moment lmao

capcom loves the face down death with writing on the ground huh LMAO

wtf is the judge talking about

i love all these scientific tests with ema! :)

i love the snackoos SFX

klav does not miss an opportunity to take a short at apollo's big forehead LMAO

APOLLO YOU DUMBASS

faking blindness is crazy

I KNEW IT WOULD BE DARYAN'S VOICE

klav's office is so much more normal than edgeworth's

WAIT IS IT GRAMARYE AND NOT GRAYMAYRE??

THE ANIMALS??

i love apollo and lamiroir goofing on klav

similar tech opening to brc

WTF WAS THAT KRISTOPH JUMPSCARE T-T

LORD DADDY???

oh he's insufferable

HOLY SHIT THAT'S WHY VERA IS STARING AT KLAV??

"rip off" phoenix is so real for that

are they injecting magnifi with piss??

im curious why kristoph would do this to phoenix

he just left his daughter???

tf is going on

T^T THE KRISTOPH ZOOM IN

why does klav have that egg from dragon tales

apollo understands me with mascots

this is so gay omfg

daryan not liking trucy means he goes even more into the shit book than before

apollo the journaling king

the x-ray function is a really fun addition

BABY TRUCY

omg phoenix with out the ugly hd redraw

GUMSHOE

he said it!!! he said 'ace attorney' lmao

i love and hate that i have to present the journal page

why does the screen shake when mr misham speaks T_T

THAT SCAR IS FREAKY

siblings omgggg

Summary:

I love this game so much. I love it so much that I am heartbroken knowing that AA 5 & 6 butchers the story it setup and I'm considering not even playing them unless AA7 is announced. I love all the main characters so much, the whole story was so well built and I can def see the influence the story had on DGS. Apollo is such a good protagonist, he's relatable but also so unique. I love seeing his character progression in the game: a new attorney who is easily manipulated to a confident and determined attorney who trusts in his own judgement. I LOVED Klavier oh my god. I love how much he respects Apollo and although he doesn't hesitate to tease him, he doesn't bully or abuse Apollo in any way. They both have a mutual admiration and rivalry where they try to play as fairly as possible. Klav doesn't maliciously withhold or change evidence, but he does spend hours reviewing his arsenal and thinks of all the counter arguments the defense could bring up. I really like Apollo's ability, it continues the mystery and mysticism from the original trilogy but with new mechanics. I adore Trucy so much. She honestly might be my favorite AA character. She's determined, strong willed, and above all -- extremely silly. I couldn't of asked for a better character to be Phoenix's daughter. I also LOVE the sibling reveal at the end but gdi if only they actually figure it out T^T T^T. I think Apollo and Trucy's dynamic is probably my favorite Defense and assistant dynamic. This who game was so fun, I know 4-3 is not everyone's favorite and it is a little all over the place but I also enjoyed it and loved the premise. There's so much to say, I haven't even talked about Nick and Kris - what an incredible feud, what a genius development for Nick. I cannot recommend this game enough, I am so obsessed with it and cannot wait to make art <3 <3.

[dullahandyke]

and now part 3 of the case 4 liveblog! during this one mam audibly commented on how much i was writing in my note book lols

ok yiss we're back boyssss it's been like a week? wowza

ah. i had forgotten i was still dealing with the garridebs when we left off. :grimace:

yeah i don't like dealing w them can we leave pls

sholmes music is banging tho

oh no susato do Not look to these fucks as an example of a romantic couple

SHAMSPEARE SPOTTED

hi shamspeare i like your vibe

god the costume jewelry is a sight to see in the 1900s tho. boy who gave you a sceptre

hiiiii natsume it's been too long... i also like your vibes

sholmes eavesdropping... girl weren't they speaking japanese????

love love love when susato turns to look at me. are you seeing this shit naruhodo-san

can't get over natsume's sopping wet pleading face

'natsume's room s cursed' are we sure that's not just a gas leak

i like sholmes's thing about belief it's v sweet

ASOUGI FLASHBACK!!!! hi asougi :)

sholmes's trout dinner.... pov dinner date w herlock sholmes he leaves you for a doohickey

love susato's fist pump sprite.... patron saint of 'we are so fucking back'

20th feb.... huh that's tomorrow. contemporaneous playthru stays winning

'do all literary people take things so literally' first off youre one to talk ryuu second off autism on autism violence????

christ bvz's cracking out the wine early

bvz you're not doing yourself any favours by toasting to the victim's death

also i love susato's description in the profiles.... a huge help to ryuu always <3

also nice to have a non0murder case for a change. usually have to go to the audio cds for that

christ they really did give us precious little evidence from that investigation huh

boooo bvz don't waste good wine like that

ok predictions: blunt knife tip + lack of actual death = green is in on a plot to frame natsume

literally where would we be without susato. god bless

also ryuu appreciation he's so cute. little shaking sprites... his kind cow-like eyes have bewitched me

bvz's blue eyes unnerve me... get him some brown contacts. or at least dark grey

ryuu going back to nervous sprites... dw my boy it will be ok

YES SUSATO THREATEN THAT VAMPIRE BITCH!!!

also donut lips juror 5... :frowning2:

love ryuu's little wall slam. him klav + mvk are a holy twinity

fairplay leading the jury is also for sure some 'get natsume found guilty + we'll find you innocent' deal

yes ryuu know your rights do the examination <3

gregson in the background of the courtroom during the summation examination... lol

banging music continues to be banging

juror 2's freakishly tiny mouth irks me... girl how do u eat

ryuu should have called juror 2 a racist idiot to her face

ryuu why did you think asking garrideb abt natsume's character would workout

u can tell i don't play new games by how impressed i am by the animation of ryuu pacing as the camera follows him. real movie magic right here

surely juror 5 would've seen natsume if he jumped the trench tho... bvz what's the plan

booooooo once again bvz is way less cool without the cloak

points. the lovecore fucks have been spotted

also according to jules, your man was originally irish so in my mind he continues to be such

points at roly. autistic as fuck to be chewing his chin strap

'patrolling the beat is the most demanding work in the world' clearly someone's never been in the tumblr trenches

if i knew the beates irl i'd literally die from romance repulsion but patricia gets a pass for being cute. she needs to divorce that cop and get herself a real man (me)

society if this game treated fat women with even an ounce of respect

disliking the persistant domestic abuse jokes(?) this case... so uncomfy

the beats theme does not... feel fitting. for either courtroom or investigative scene

love ryuu's confident smirk... he's so >:)

bvz you need to get susato tossed so damn badly

'one of britain's guiding principles is tolerance' lol. lmao even

bvz's scowl sprite looks like 'eat yo sandwich bitch! the fuck you looking crazy for

LEGSLAM

i can so vividly envision juror 2's instgram it's awful

my god a third abusive wife... i have a feeling it's abusive wives instead of husbands bcos abusive husbands are more likely to be taken seriously/not treated as a bit joke and i dont like it

[sucker-for-shifters]

For Day 6 of GtWAC:

Authors, share your favorite tags you’ve found on your work.

~~~

I actually haven’t gotten any tags on my Tumblr works, but I’ve gotten a few comments on my AO3 works, so I’ll use a few of those instead.

"THIS MADE MY HEART MELT AAAAAAAA"

"I can't- I- dhdjdgdjsh [Sobbing and Doe Eyes emojis] this is so cute oml...... I love the interactions between Apollo and Klav...... <333" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA /pos" "OH MY GOD???? HELLO????? NEW FAVE CHAPTER????????? YELLING!!!!!! Apollo comforting Klavier [4 doe eyes emojis] helping despite not rlly understaning but just knowing Klav needs help im just WAAAAAAAAHHH Brb rereading this bc i love this sm"

"OUGH THIS CHAPTER WAS SO GOOD HELLO?? HOLY SHIT the setup for [I'm not spoiling this. You can read the fic yourself if you want to. Also, play Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney. This fic has spoilers.] and AAAAAAA you're so talented; I love your work, absolutely jaw-dropping and elegant writing!!"

~~~

And just because, I'll include the fic that all of these comments are from. Here's the link for it on AO3.

[7clubs]

1-5 for the otp asks, any ship

gonna split these amongst a bunch of ships i enjoy (though expect a lot of sebfran/yumimei lol)

1: Klapollo mostly, side comment narumitsu & yumimei

3: Narumitsu

4: super super rarepairs (courtris, langris, cammy/shih-na)

the rest are yumimei xP

1. Who most initiates PDA?

(Klapollo) Klav... he is soooo needy he'll butt his head in if he has to... and absolutely a big part of it is that he likes to annoy Apollo a bit specifically and see his cute pouty face and get a diet slice of that lover's quarrel because Polly's embarrassed to be seen affectionate in public but he likes it when Klav rubs his crown/hair on him. muah and also Klav likes to lean on him to subtly (?) tease him for being cute and short.

(Narumitsu and Yumimei are both very private lmao but for the latter when they go for the hand-hold it's pretty much in unison)

2. Any sleep habits either had to get used to?

(Yumimei) they are BOTH blanket thieves. bedtime is war.

3. Hot and Steamy or Soft and Tender? (Narumitsu) Both are good... why must we choose... Can't Edgeworth tenderly kissing his knuckles not be laced with a side of the most charged and wanting look in the eyes... And vice versa but we don't do that on this blog.....

4. How did they first meet?

Most of my main ships have canon meetings so like. I guess we have to go for the deep dives. and a bunch of them even (That said I think it'd be cute if Seb and Fran actually briefly met as kids at some stuffy party both MVK and Blaise attended but don't remember it…)

(Courtney/Sister Iris) In the detention center when Iris is doing a little community service and Courtney is like wait... are you lost... because she's just so gentle looking and Iris says some wild shit like ah no I'm truly here to atone for my sins and some fraughtness in my soul but because Courtney is Like That Too Kinda she's like. I'll take your word for it.

She looks into the news archives later and learns Iris is an accessory to manslaughter or something and wonders why the fuck Edgeworth seems to be involved in every case she researches

(Shih-na/Cammy) Yew was sitting disrespectfully on Alba's desk doing her Shih-na makeup and getting powder all over his forged documents or something and Cammy walks in all sleepygirl to deliver a report and sees Calisto/Shih-na/whatever like half done and goes wow... pretty woman.... and Yew looks at her back and thinks wow... tits...

(Lang/Iris) at the narumitsu wedding lol

5. What is their love language?

(Yumimei) Talking, truly listening to each other absolutely... the thing that brought them together as friends. But Fran is also a big gift giver while Seb is a big initiator of things like physical affection and suggesting dates because it's how they let Fran know they're obsessed with her and she knows Fran loves it. teehee.

[hibiscus-ships]

Howdy Jenni!!

You're so so sweet, thank you for your kind words on my chess art ft. Tex and Jim I appreciate you so much!!

Speaking of games, what kind of games do you and Klavier like to play for game night :D??

Skipper @tex-treasures

Hi Tex! I'm glad you liked my comments! :3

Klavier learned how to play chess and checkers from his brother Kristoph who beat him at either game 98% of the time, but still. He has taught Jenni how to play both. Both Klav and Jenni also like playing Settlers of Catan, and Jenni was surprisingly able to get him into playing DND???? Klavier unironically loves DND though, he is That Guy who will bring one of his guitars along to a session so that he can roleplay as his bard character more effectively. It's beautiful. 🌺

[crackmadhi]

Day 30 - Accepted

Saturday, 5 May 2012 – Age 13 Aura opened the apartment door and threw her keys on the drawer next to the door. On it was a mess out of various clothing pieces neither of the siblings had put away. She grumbled to herself already feeling that it would be on her to take on that task.

Lazily she slandered into the kitchen where Simon leaned onto the counter watching her as she entered. His hands were hidden in the black hoody, he was wearing and his long bangs hid part of his eyes and the weariness in them.

Worried Aura frowned and got closer to him watching him taking a deep a breath and a small shiver going through his body.

“What is it? Did you knock up a girl or what?” she half-heartedly joked but swallowed any more comments instantly, as she saw him flinch strongly.

“I have something to tell you.”

He swallowed nervously with his voice even and smooth. Aura nodded and crossed her arms in front of her chest. This was unlike him.

“You told me to think outside the norms and let myself live outside of these buckets and… I- I looked stuff up because you know so much of it and I wanted to know more and… I read about something and I felt like it described me quite well, but I wasn’t sure if this was just a moment thing so I waited, because it could change quickly, because I’m a teenager and hormones and stuff but- But it’s been almost three months. And it doesn’t change. And so, I guess it might stay like this for a while, so…”

He stopped and looked to his sister like a fearful deer.

“It’s fine. I’m not gonna shout. I won’t be mad”, she said and stepped towards him uncrossing her arms.

He bit his lips, fear glistering in his eyes yet he opened his mouth and finished: “I think I’m asexual and aromantic.”

Confused Aura looked at him. He started hyperventilating and she softly laid her hand on his chest, slowly breathing in and out with him. Slowly he recovered and she tilted her head and let out a laugh.

“And I thought you were going to tell me something dramatic and world-changing.”

Simon’s well broke down and he started to sob: “You’re not disappointed?”

“What for?” she asked him and took him in her arms.

“For- for not being able to fall in love?” he stammered looked up to her. “For maybe never bringing home someone? For just… being like this?”

“Oh lord”, she said and cupped his wet cheeks, “what would I care about the people you bring home or do not bring home? You never question the women I bring along, so why do you think I would do that with you? I don’t care if you’re are ace or aro, or both. I don’t care if it’s forever or a phase. It’s you and you’re just fine as long as you’re happy with yourself! And if you say you are aromantic and asexual and you felt like this for several months already, then that is awesome! You’re awesome!”

And beyond the tears there finally came his smile back.

Trembling he put his arms around her and cried in her chest. He was relieved. She didn’t hate him. She didn’t police him. She just…

“Hey do you think you might be agender as well? Then you’d be a triple A!” Aura teased and he snorted in her chest.

Tears, now from laughing, in his eyes he looked up and said with a smirk: “You’re horrible.”

Saturday, 30 June 2046 – Age 47 Simon put the salad on the table and walked back into the kitchen to see if Nahyuta needed help. As he entered, they walked towards him with the soup in their hands and nodded towards the bread on the counter. Simon understood and went to grab the bread before he followed his partner.

Once in the living room Penda immediately called for her brother.

“Tuma! Lunch! Now!”

Simon glanced over to Nahyuta and they exchanged an amused grin. The boy promptly came in and stretched his arms. He might have lain in bed until now, reading a manga or two and maybe also flick through some psychology books. Maybe a little strange for a soon twelve-year-old, but then again not so strange considering the people he lived with.

“What are we having?” he asked with a wide smile directed to Nahyuta and hopped on his chair.

They didn’t even bother answering, as Tumaini did it himself and commented on the soup with contentment. Enthusiastically he held out his plate and asked Nahyuta to give him some soup. The followed order and went on with Simon’s plate next.

“Thank you”, he said low-key and watched them giving themselves a ladle.

“I can take it myself, thank you!” Penda said and motioned for the ladle.

Nahyuta handed it to her and she served herself and then they all could finally dive in. Simon was eating the slowest, waiting for the soup to cool down a bit and watching his two children happily. Penda was rushing a bit more than usually. She wanted to go to meet up in the library with her learn group in an hour and she hated it to be late.

“It’s the 30th of June”, Tuma mentioned at once and eyed up to both grown-ups.

Nahyuta eyed Simon and then turned to their son: “Yes, that is correct. Are you reminding us of your birthday on the 3rd? We didn’t forget that, don’t worry.”

Tuma shook his head and glanced up at Penda with an eye roll, which she answered with a shrug.

“I know you won’t forget my birthday! You never did! I mean because it’s the end of Pride month. I just remembered and we haven’t done a lot besides visiting the parade. Are you sad because of that? – He looked to Simon – You always seem to enjoy it so much and I feel like we didn’t celebrate it that much this year…”

Simon grinned. The second year Tumaini and Penda had been around, the little boy had cross knotted him and Nahyuta bracelets in their respective flags’ colours for pride month. It had come absolutely unexpected for them and Simon wore them everyday until one tore apart and Tumaini made him a new one.

That was four years ago and every year after that he had thought of something small to do for them during this time. And quite honestly? That gesture from a little boy, who had grown up around two homophobic and transphobic parents, meant a lot to Simon. It was even nicer since Penda had started to properly help him with it two years ago, when she had bought the food dye and made cookies in the colours in the non-binary and aromantic colours.

In these moments, Simon felt warm. He felt at peace and at home. There had been a lot of hardship in his life. Naturally, not everything was tied to his identity and it didn’t have to be quite frankly.

It usually just made things harder to not quite fit in a sex- and amanormative society as an aroace dude.

And yet, by now…

He was fine with it. He was fine because he didn’t have to fight everyday to get acceptance and kindness for himself. He was fine because he had support and could give support to the lovely person next to him, who used they/them pronouns for almost 16 years now. He was fine because he had his people around him and a family he had never expected to have.

He was fine not celebrating Pride excessively this year because he didn’t need celebrating his identity. No, he could live his identity every day of the year and that was a privilege he knew to cherish more than anything else.

It was why he still loved pride month a lot. It was for the people, who needed to celebrate their identity at least during this time, because they couldn’t live their identities. Because they were rejected by their families, laughed and stared at and couldn’t be vocal about themselves. Or didn’t want to be open about it, which was fine too.

Pride month was for the people who he used to be like. And of course also still for him but he didn’t need this focus anymore and in a way he had his own Pride at home every single day when he came home and was accepted by his qpp, daughter and son.

  “I’m happy as it is. But if you want, we could make a pan cake for uncle Klav. He might be moved to tears like last year, yeah?”

 Heeeey! This is the end! I didn't manage to reach my goal and post a chapter everyday, but I'll add the missing ones in the next days^^ It was just too damn hot and I've prewritten this chapter a while ago, because it is meant to end a circle. We started with Denied and end with Accepted and I hope that's a journey all of us can go through one day^^

Anyway. Thank you for sticking around, please leave a comment if you got the time, take care and have a wonderful day.

Link

[violetprosecutor-a]

[ TEXT: ] i dont think i ever properly thanked you for the gifts??? callie loves the toys, and the coat is really nice too. it fits perfectly! also, this cd.. this is all your solo work so far, right? i actually really like it. the third one is my favourite, i think? it.. i dunno, speaks to me on a personal level or something? is that weird? anyways, thanks again. it was really nice of you to think of us, klav. i appreciate it. [ IMG SENT: a picture of Apollo's cat with one of said toys. ]

     another day, another case laid across his desk. a particularly gruesome one this time, his phone vibrating actually startles him out of reading the autopsy report for the third ( or fourth ) time. he sets the folder down to grab his phone, thumbing the messages open with no small amount of curiosity.

     his face breaks into a smile at apollo’s comment about the music. ah, apollo would never realize he played the part of a muse, would he? not unless klavier told him outright about it.

     the photo of the cat makes his smile softer. oh, how sweet.

     ( sent to: herr forehead ) i’m glad it fit!! i asked trucy about your size, but i wasn’t sure, so i’m glad i got it first try. give callie plenty of kisses for me, since i can’t. allergies are awful. : (     ( sent to: herr forehead ) i have a few songs in the works too for next time. maybe i’ll send the files to you first, if you enjoy them that much.

[crackmadhi]

This is me?

Saturday, 10 November 2029

Simon Blackquill shall be damned for his uncannily accurate ability to read people. No one had ever been able to see right through Nahyuta before.

This whole day had been nothing like Nahyuta had thought it to be. When he had entered his partner’s apartment, he had not been planning to go shopping with the wannabe samurai. But then, of course, he had to ask Simon why exactly he was always wearing the old Cosmos Space Centre hoodie and the same washed-out trousers at home.

“That’s all the casual stuff I have. I’ve got nothing else to wear”, had been Simon’s answer.

Unbelievingly Nahyuta had stared at him since he had still hoped that Simon was only joking. However, there came no dark chuckle from the Twisted Samurai and thus Nahyuta decided that they had to buy Simon new clothes. After a short argument, Nahyuta had overruled Simon’s excuses and called a cab.

They went to the place Klavier and Nahyuta had visited before together. It was a nice, a bit exclusive store, where they sold many different kinds of clothing, and Nahyuta was sure that Simon would find something he would like.

Yet somehow, the whole thing turned out to be much more difficult than Nahyuta had imagined it would be. Firstly, why on earth was a man, who did not care a whole lot about his appearance, so picky about the style of his new clothes? In half an hour, Simon managed to look at eight different black hoodies and not wanting to try on a single one of them.

Nahyuta did not understand it. This was not like Simon. Yes, the man was stubborn at times and could be a real dick about minor stuff that annoyed him. However, as soon as he realized that something was necessary, he usually turned his gruffness down and cooperated more or less smoothly. There had to be a reason for Simon’s odd behaviour and Nahyuta started to look for exactly that reason.

When he found it, he slapped himself internally for not noticing it sooner. A salesperson had been helping them thorough their whole time here. She had brought them different shirts and trousers for Simon to try on. Nahyuta had found her very helpful so far, but Simon did not share that sentiment. Nahyuta had noticed before how uncomfortable and awkward Simon was in conversations with strangers outside the courtroom and the prosecutors’ office. The Samurai hated talking with them but did not want to be rude and tell them to leave.

Now, Nahyuta had to tell the woman to leave, since his dearest Simon could not bring himself to do it himself.

“Please excuse me ma’am”, he said to the salesperson, “but I think we will manage on our own for now. But your help was very much appreciated.”

The woman nodded understandingly and left. Immediately, Simon grew more comfortable and actually went back to an aisle, where he had seen a sweater with NASA prints on it.

Nahyuta did not comment on it and left Simon alone. He wandered around the store and looked at some pretty, white pullovers. After some time, he found himself again in the women’s section. He did not know why, but he had always liked to look at those clothes. There was something strange about the more feminine and plain pieces that fascinated him.

He had always wanted to look at them for some longer but had never dared to do so under Ga’ran’s constant monitoring. And as representative regent of Khura’in he had to be even more careful of what to say and do. One false step and it could cause a nationwide scandal.

Bitter he turned around to look for Simon. But his worry for the man was quickly forgotten, as a dress caught his attention. It was an empire dress with a white top part and a maroon pleated skirt starting under the bust. It was such a simple design but Nahyuta could not look away anymore. It almost hurt him to just look at it. He wanted to feel the fabric, touch the lanced white neckline.

What was that thought just now? Nahyuta shook his head vehemently to snap out of it. He could not have such thoughts, he told himself and walked away from the aisle. He had to find Simon anyway, there was no time for such ridiculous things.

To his surprise Simon was not too far away. He stood in the aisle next to Nahyuta and looked at some unisex long-sleeves shirt. The Samurai looked up and waited for the other man to come closer.

Silently Simon eyed him up. Then, he discreetly pointed at the little basket in his hand and said: “I think I have what I need. Have you seen something for yourself?”

As he had said the last phrase he had looked up to the dress behind Nahyuta. The one he had stared at just shortly before. The one he wanted to try on so badly. The one he could never have.

“No. I don’t. Let’s pay”, Nahyuta said coolly and turned towards the checkout.

But Nahyuta did not come far. He realized that Simon was not following him, and he had to turn back and see what the man wanted from him.

“Simon - “

“Let me be clear”, Simon interrupted him without hesitation, “you stared at this dress for like the past five minutes and are telling me now that you do not even want to try it on? You like clothes, shopping for clothes and trying clothes on. And I pretty sure that this one would suit you very well. So, what’s the deal with it?”

This could not be happening. He could not have this conversation with him right now.

“Firstly, Simon, I did not stare at it. Secondly, I don’t even like clothes that much. And thirdly – “

He did not continue further as he saw Simon’s unconvinced expression. He did not believe him at all and Nahyuta knew that he would not be abele to convince him otherwise.

“I cannot prove that you stared at it, but I definitely saw it. And you definitely love fashion. Only yesterday you talked with Klav about the importance of accessories for a whole hour. Try to deny it, but it won’t help. Please, tell me what’s the real problem.”

Nahyuta did not react to the comment outwardly. This situation was not something he wanted to deal with, but he was unable to dodge Simons question any longer.

“Look, I just can’t wear a dress. I should not even think about it, okay?”, Nahyuta said smoothly and looked away.

An even deeper frown appeared on Simon’s face. Without further ado, he turned away from Nahyuta and went to the next salesperson he could find.

“What the fuck is he doing now?”, Nahyuta thought cluelessly, as he watched his partner talking to the woman.

Suddenly they went somewhere, leaving Nahyuta behind. As he started thinking about just leaving the store and acting as if all of this had never happened, Simon came back and told him plainly: “I’m done. Let’s go.”

Before Nahyuta could interfere, Simon already started to walk and left him no other choice than to follow him.

As soon they were outside Nahyuta asked him gesticulating furiously: “What in the Holy Mother’s name were you doing in there? What was this about?”

Without paying too much attention to the monk Simon stated firmly: “Well, at first I asked the saleswoman in which size I should buy the dress. I knew you’re a 38, but I had no idea what that was in the woman’s chart. So, I asked her, she told me and brought me the dress in the right size. Then I paid.”

“You did WH - “

“Shout and cry as much as you like. I saw you staring at this thing for five minutes and I saw the expression in your face. You don’t have to keep it, but I want you to try it on at least once. You don’t have to show me, just try it on, when we get home. Alright?”

As Nahyuta heard the low, worried voice of the samurai he remained silent.

And so, they returned to Simon’s apartment. As soon as Simon set his bags on the floor in the living room, he placed himself on his couch and let out a relieved groan.

“Too much peopling, my panda?”, Nahyuta smiled as he petted the samurai’s hair.

The exhausted huff coming from the tall man was answer enough for Nahyuta. Lazily he started to put the bags away and made some tea for the both of them, while he was at it. He brought the tea into the living room and took some sips of it.

After some seconds he caught Simon staring at him. He saw the wish to speak in his eyes. He knew that his unusual behaviour did not go unnoticed by his partner and that Simon wanted nothing more than helping him overcome his demons.

But Simon was also a considerate man. He knew that this was not turn to talk and so he kept his mouth shut and did not react, as Nahyuta grabbed the bag with the wicked dress in it and entered the bathroom.

And here he was now. In a dress in front of Simon’s toilet. It was bizarre and improbable, yet it was the truth.

And secretly, Nahyuta had to admit, he was grateful. The fabric was softer than he had believed it to be and he could not help himself and admire the white top part. It was a high neck neckline and the laced cloth looked elegant, and yet simple. The long sleeves emphasized the gracious curves of his arms and he did not start to dare looking at the high waistline of this dress. It was too perfect to be true.

Warily he took a deep breath. What was he doing? He could not wear a dress. Well, he should not wear a dress, to be precise. There was no way that his mother would accept this. Or the khura’inese court for the matter of fact.

“This is ridiculous”, he muttered in khura’inese and collapsed on the toilet seat. Helplessly he let his hand run over the deep red fabric of the skirt. It made him smile. It made him happy. Maybe, only maybe, it was okay to forget for a second that he should not wear this dress. Slowly he stood up again and started to spin a bit until the skirt started flowing. He quickly realized that this was indeed the best thing he had ever done, and he knew he would not stop doing it as long as he wore this piece of clothing.

And then he felt the urge to show Simon. He wanted to show him how he looked in it, to see his face while he was spinning and smiling. And maybe he could also close the zipper on his back, he himself was unable to reach.

Unsure Nahyuta bit his lip. He was uncertain if his train of thought was still making sense or his common sense had been lost in the maroon wrinkles of his skirt.

But was there something to lose really? If he was honest to himself, there really was nothing bad coming out of this.

“Simon?”, he asked through the bathroom door.

“Yeah?”, came the muffled response.

“Would you like to see it?”

A short few seconds of silence.

“Sure. I’d love that.”

Nahyuta let out a relieved breath, which he had not noticed he had been holding. Exiting swiftly, he made his way into the living room. There he found Simon sitting on the couch and playing around with his smartphone. The older’s eyes immediately jumped over to Nahyuta. For some split seconds his face remained stoic and unfazed. Then it lit up. Nahyuta could genuinely see how Simons eyes started to sparkle. The simple but pure delight radiating from him was almost touchable.

“Said it would look good on you”, Simon stated and stood up.

Nahyuta rolled his eyes but did not comment it. Instead he started to spin for a bit, since the living room offered him way more room to do so than the bathroom did.

“Wait, stand still for a sec. I'll close the zipper”, Simon stopped him, walked over and pushed Nahyuta’s plait to the side.

A bit taken aback Nahyuta froze in his movement, while he felt Simon's hand on his neck. It was just a quick moment, Simon had obviously done that more than one time in the past, but Nahyuta enjoyed the touch. There was something about Simon's movements that was special to him.

Suddenly the hand disappeared, and Simon stepped in front of him. Lightly he nudged Nahyuta’s shoulder while he observed the monk thoroughly.

“It obviously doesn't fit ideally in the chest area. There is too much fabric or too little breasts. But otherwise it's a surprisingly good match”, Nahyuta stated calmly while Simon was still staring.

Momentarily Simon stepped back and locked his eyes with Nahyuta's: “True. You did choose wisely.”

Then he went back to the couch and sat down. He did not take his smartphone but did not attempt to talk anymore.

It did not bother Nahyuta, though. He was happy for now and spun around some more, enjoying the feeling of happiness and cosiness in his own body.

Not that he usually felt bad in his skin. He liked his body all in all most of the time. He was rather content with it. He had always looked good, it was just… something he could not quite place, and right now he did not care for it at all. Right now, he felt great.

And the he suddenly heard the doorbell ringing.

Klavier. He had said he would come over.

Immediately Nahyuta ran back in the bathroom. While Nahyuta was occupied with panicking, Simon stood up to open the door.

He was somewhat annoyed with Nahyuta’s terrified reaction, but he was unable to change anything about his paranoia.

Simon pushed the button to open the front door and waited until Klavier had reached his floor to let him in.

“Oh, hello Herr Samurai! How kind of you to let me in”, the blond man said jokingly as he entered.

“You’re welcome. I do not grant entrance to a lot of people, if you must know”, Simon said shaking his head.

“Ja? Is that so? So, I am a chosen one?”, Klavier asked and smirked deviously.

Dramatically Simon threw his hands in the air and commented exhausted: “That’s one way to put it. You know you’re horrible, right?”

“Why would you say that to your beloved guest, panda? Is he not the one, who will always enlighten your day?”

Both prosecutors looked to the corridor, where Nahyuta was standing. Simon was impressed how fast the man had managed to change into his normal clothes. Yet he was not too happy about those two men being together right now. In the right mood, they became real energy suckers, and that was the last thing he needed right now.

“Are these shopping bags?”

And with this Simon’s fate was decided. Immediately the two men started bugging him into showing them his new clothes and Simon had no other choice than playing along.

“I love these comfy meet ups”, Klavier stated after they had put away the remains of their Chinese takeout.

Nahyuta giggled at that and sat down on the couch next to Simon. Relaxed he looked down at Klavier lying on the floor and responded: “I love them as well. It is always a joy spending time with the two of you. It’s very relaxing.”

Simon agreed with a hum but said nothing further. Calmly Nahyuta minimized the distance between him and his samurai. Tenderly he started to nestle Simon, to what the other responded instantly with snuggling the monk next to him.

For a while the three men stayed like this in silence. It had been a long week and sometimes it was just nice to be quite with one another. There was privacy in this stillness.

“Oh, and… The dress in the bag in the bathroom… Mind to tell me whose it is?”

Nahyuta shot up and startled Simon rather badly. Klavier sat up and gave the monk a confused look. Fast he checked in with Simon, who looked anything but happy with the turn of events.

“Yuta, please. Everything is fine”, Simon started but his words fell on deaf ears.

Panicking Nahyuta had stood up and started pacing around behind the couch. He did not want to talk about this. He did not want Klavier to know. Nobody should know about this.

Mumbling he drove through his hair: “How could I ever agree to this? I should never have gone in that aisle. I should have stayed where I belonged and – and – “

“Whoa, whoa!”, Klavier interfered. “Stop right there! There is nothing wrong with wearing dresses the last time I checked. I didn’t want to initiate a crisis, I was just curious whose dress it was. Let’s calm down and talk this through, if you’d like to, of course. This is a safe space and there is no one here who will judge you, Nahyuta. You’re safe.”

Warily Nahyuta looked over to the two men observing him anxiously. He knew that they would never judge him for something so insignificant to them. But to him it was not insignificant. To him it was a one of the most terrifying things he could imagine. And he did not even know why.

“Please. I’m worried. Don’t keep it to yourself like I always do. Don’t destroy yourself. Please.”

Of course, Simon would say that. And of course, it would work. How could it not, when Nahyuta could clearly see the honesty in Simon’s eyes.

He sighed and walked back over to them.

“I apologize for freaking out. I – I wasn’t prepared to face this matter just yet. Or ever, to be clear.”

“Ah, it happens to the best of us”, Klavier said with in a relieved tone. “I could have asked nicer or asked not at all. I’m really sorry for stressing you out. I’d like to avoid that in the future, but in order to do that… Well, I need to know, what was the problem… so…?”

As Klavier had spoken, Nahyuta had come back to the couch and was now sitting next to Simon as before. He was still a bit antsy and was uncertain how to address the matter properly.

“You don’t need to be precise. You don’t even need to say anything right now. If you want us to stop talking about this, you can tell us that as well. We will wait until you’re ready”, Simon told him softly.

Nahyuta smiled faintly at Simon’s words. The samurai had said this so easily, but he knew precisely how hard it would be for the other one to be left in the unknown. There were very few things that made him more anxious than not knowing the truth. But for Nahyuta he would endure it. He would not press or investigate any further, until Nahyuta would give him the thumbs up to do so.

And with Klavier it was exactly the same. He could trust them.

“It’s alright Simon. I trust you. And it’s probably a good thing to talk about this, anyway. I just don’t know where to start. There’s so much and I can’t think straight. It’s all fuzzy and woolly.”

Klavier scratched his chin pensively. A start was what they need, huh? Maybe he could offer him one.

“Maybe let’s just start with looking at the core of the problem. Why did you panic when I found out that you’ve worn a dress? How about that?”

Nahyuta bit his lip but agreed: “That might be the most logical step. I’m can assure you that it didn’t stress me that you found it out, but generally the thought of people knowing frightens me. I don’t want people to know.”

“Good start”, Simon comments dryly. “Now, this raises the question, what frightens you about that thought. Are you afraid of the people’s reactions, that they might judge you? Are you scared of what they might say, of what they might think of you? That it might change how you would be treated? Is it one of these or something completely different?”

Nahyuta had listen carefully to Simon’s words and know he realized something.

“I…”, he started but stopped to restart while looking at Simon intently, “In a way it’s all of this. To some extend at least. But the thing I’m the most scared of is what it would mean for my social standing in Khura’in. There I am some sort of symbol, the son of the revolutionary, the man who suffered through this all with them. I’m supposed to be strong, unwavering, always certain of what to do. They do not need somebody who’s questioning their own choices. I can’t be vulnerable. I can’t allow myself to question who I am. And when I wore that dress… I – I…”

Staring at his shaking hands Nahyuta broke off.

Immediately he felt how a big hand comically lightly was laid on his shoulders. He did not need to look up to know what kind of look Simon just gave him. He did not want to see it. Then another pair of hands, easy to recognize due to the cold metal rings on the fingers, was placed on his arm.

“Guys, please”, Nahyuta begged not wanting anymore of this.

“Of course”, Simon said shooting a look towards Klavier signalling to let go of the man.

“Hearing you say this… It makes me think…”

Nahyuta dared to look up. Something pensive and worried raged in Simon’s eyes.

“Think what? Go on.”

“It sounded like… Wearing that dress… made you look different at yourself? That it made you doubt yourself? Or am I interpreting this wrong?”

Nahyuta burst out in laughter. Not in a happy or hysterical way, no. It was a loud, humourless sound that scared the hell out of Simon and Klavier.

With his hands he tiredly rubbed his face and tried to figure out what to tell Simon now. He was not sure if he understood it entirely himself. So how was he supposed to explain it to his friends?

“You are indeed wrong, Simon”, Nahyuta said after a while smiling cluelessly. He still had no idea how to tell them, but he was beyond the point of caring. He wanted to get this out of his system. Whenever they understood or not, for him it was all the same.

“For the very first time I just felt like myself. Not great, not perfect nor beautiful. I just felt… me. That’s it. I never even knew that I sometimes didn’t really see myself in – in the reflection. I didn’t have the time to care about this! I had to rescue my sister, play my aunt’s perfect little pawn. There never was time for this. There never was time for me…”

Nahyuta paused. Did that even make sense? He did not think so.

“You are making sense Nahyuta”, Simon said compassionately as if he just had heard his doubts.

“Come again?”

“You’re talking about your emotions. And emotions are not bound to logic. That’s why the appear to be random and unpredictable at some times. And that’s fine! Actually, I think you’re on to something. Don’t stop now! Go further. Tell me how you felt in the dress. I mean beside feeling like yourself, if you understand.”

Nahyuta stared at him sceptically. What was there to find, really? Hastily he glanced over to Klavier, who only shrugged.

Well, what did he have to lose?

“I felt comfortable. Safe, in a way. As if it brought out who I am. I never knew that a simple piece of clothing could do that…”

A smile formed on Simon’s lips. Subtly, so Nahyuta would not see it, he exchanged a glance with Klavier.

This turn of events was not what the former rock star had expected. And he was not sure what Nahyuta meant, but judging from the satisfied grin on Simon’s face, it was something important. He was curious where they were heading with this.

Simon sat up straight and nudged Nahyuta in the side, so he would look at him. When Nahyuta looked up he found a rather smug looking Simon smiling at him.

“You really looked happy with yourself. It was a form of happiness, or maybe even more contentment, I normally cannot see in you.”

“Really? You could see that?”, Klavier asked doubtfully.

Simon nodded complacently, as he ignored Nahyuta shaking his head in disbelieve.

“Trust me. Everybody could have seen that”, Simon claimed and crossed his arms.

In a flash Nahyuta stood up. Perplexed Klavier stared at him, as he dashed through the living room to the bathroom door. Before he could even think of phrasing a question Nahyuta growled without looking back: “We’ll see that soon enough. I’m positive that you’re bluffing, reversed panda.”

With that Klavier and Simon were left behind.

Carefully Klavier leaned back and squinted at Simon. What was he doing?

“You were provoking him to do this, weren’t you?”

“Yes, I was”, Simon confirmed smiling shamelessly.

“What do you think is going to happen now? What’s the deal?”

“Well, he wanted proof. And he will get it.”

“You mean that I will see that he looks outwardly content?”

Simon stood up and turned towards his bedroom. Slowly he shook his head. He did not think that Nahyuta would gain happiness solely through the acceptance of others. He needed to find it within himself…

“I’m not even sure if I really saw that”, Simon admitted gripping the door handle of his room. “But I think he’ll see it, when he actually gets the chance to see himself.”

Then he disappeared in his room and Klavier felt like a fool. Why again did he choose these overly cryptic and dramatic people to be his friends? He growled and massaged his temples, while waiting for one of them to return and make him feel less of an id-

“Klavier, I’ll come out now, so please… be kind?”, Nahyuta cried insecurely through the door.

Klavier laughed, stood up and turned to the bathroom.

“You already came out to me, remember? And I was very kind to you”, he teased stemming his hands on his hips.

“Klavier!”

“I’m kidding, ja? I’ve already seen men wearing dresses. I was in the show biz, and stranger shit than this is happening there, trust me”, he reassured him in a soft voice.

A muffled “okay” echoed through the door, before it opened and Nahyuta stepped out. Klavier had imagined that the monk would look good but boy had he underestimated his natural beauty.

“Hallelujah, I say! That’s quite a look you’ve got there”, Klavier smiled excitedly.

Nahyuta played unconsciously with his hair. A shy smile stole his way on his lips and he responded calmly: “Thank you. Would you close it in the back? I can’t reach the zipper.”

“Sure thing!”, Klavier agreed immediately and rushed over to close it.

Just as earlier Nahyuta started to spin around. And as he did so, Klavier could not deny that there was some sort of glow around the man. Something that probably had always been there but was normally hidden within him, safe from the eyes of the public. Safe from the eyes of his friends and family. Safe from even his own eyes.

Smooth footsteps tore him out of his thoughts and he saw Simon carrying a big mirror. The mirror, they had bought for him, when they had gone shopping for furniture. They never had had the chance to hang it up.

Carefully Simon carried it further into the room, winked in Klavier’s direction and then called for Nahyuta.

“Hey. Over here. Thought it might be nice to get a full look at yourself, hm?”

Unsuspectingly Nahyuta turned around. Simon was there. He held mirror meant to be hanging on a wall.

And suddenly he saw his reflection. His full reflection. He saw himself. He saw his hands move towards chest. He saw his eyes widen in surprise. He saw his feet move over the floor as he stepped back.

It was not someone who the people recognized as Nahyuta Sahdmadhi. Not what they said him to be. Not what they wanted him to be.

It was him. He suddenly saw, what the people always said they saw in him. He actually saw himself and it was… good. It felt right. It was right.

“This… this is me?”

Calmly he lifted his eyes towards Simon. The man looked worried. It was not all days that you would see a man staring numbly at his reflection in awe.

“Yeah”, he gulped quizzingly, “this is you.”

Quickly Nahyuta glanced over to Klavier, who was just as dazed as Simon was.

He affirmed without being asked the question: “Ja, this is you.”

Turning back to the mirror. Looking at the reflection. Seeing the person, he was. Yes, this was him.

Nahyuta smiled.

“I think I just met myself for the first time in a long, long time.”

He looked up and saw a very affectioned Simon smiling proudly at him. From behind a hand patted kindly his shoulders.

“That’s quite the reunion, hm?”, Simon said, laying the mirror on the floor and slandering over to the men in the dress.

Simon pulled Nahyuta gently in a hug. The latter did not complain. He felt the safety radiating through Simon’s touch. And he also felt the reassuring look from Klavier.

He loved his friends. Here he was actually free. Here he actually got the chance to find and be himself.

Lowly he whispered in Simon’s sweater:

“This – This is me.”

Link to the story on ao3:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15896139