#also Sherlock you're smarter than that!

[thekittyfox2999]

Okay- I can't vote on it (probably a good thing) and since no one asked, here are my opinions as a purely acd canon fan who hasn't seen most of this in years (and also has only read devils foot soo) :

Sherlock is okay. But I feel like he's missing something... neutral +1. (they did him dirty with the "sister, i have a sister" first meeting thing as well as the gay connection)

John feels like a confused sopping wet cat i left outside for too long. Not in that he is aggressive, but he's simply pure confused main character energy. But hey- most of Freemans roles boil down to the awkward loser love interest, sorry.

Molly. Don't like her. She's so dumb. The speculation fanfiction scene where people think she was in on Sherlocks fake death and they kiss makes me feel icky. Also, boring.

Greg is fine. I don't have anything to say, except for that he is probably the closest to his canon counterpart(s)

Jim makes me laugh and he has an energy that I find fun. His actor (sorry mate, forgot your name) put so much effort into the role and I understand why someone would fear him. But he doesn't strike as much fear as his canon variant. I believe the script writers simply took a day off with his personality. I like him, but he could have been more intimidating.

Mary... was she the spy? Oh well. She lacks interesting personality and I felt bored watching her and John bond in S1E2. She is only in the way to prevent actual fans making Sherlock and John make out. (Same goes for most of these women)

Mycroft!! My guy! He's my favourite. From what I remember from my rewatch, he is mysterious, chill, calm and sounds great. He is the best of the bunch. He is great. I love him.

Mrs Hudson!!!! I love her. No comment.

Anderson. Legit don't remember if he has any big role other than getting yelled at by Sherlock. He's fine I guess.

Sally. She has personality. Legit don't know what to say. Uhm. She seems the most normal and sane in S1E1. Other than that, a little annoying.

Irene. I have a problem with her. And it's that they legit reduced her to have zero brains. How couldn't she have known Sherlock was using her to get into the office that one time to then later have a flashback about his dog. She feels so off from the actual Adler. They both knew it was a ploy!

Fuck you- anyways.

Top three are Mycroft, Mrs Hudson and Jim.

Drops mike and lights the kitchen on fire.

[married-to-google-translater]

So if this don't bother you, you would write about William and Sherlock with a y/n as smart as them but incredible lazy

You don't bother me <3

Sherlock Holmes

You really intrigued Sherlock.

You two met each other at some fancy party.

Sherlock recognized your intelligence right away, but not you as a person.

He would think that with those intellectual gifts you would have recognition.

However, Sherlock was wrong.

Probably the first time in years.

Sherlock would spend almost all of his time with you.

You would talk about a lot of things and have a good time.

When Sherlock got back home he would start investigating you more.

Watson might think you're some level of criminal...

Sherlock was so passionate about his research.

The first meeting will definitely not be the only one.

Eventually, friendship would lead to dating.

Good luck with Sherlock, you're going to need it.

You two would have intelligent conversations every now and then.

Sherlock might try to bribe you to help him with his detective work.

The success rate of this would be variable lol

William James Moriarty

William met you on the first day at the flower shop.

At first he was just going to get some seeds for Fred's garden.

However, things had not gone as he had planned.

You two would get into a really interesting conversation.

William noticed right away that you are smarter than you look.

However, this could cause problems for him.

At first this was William's explanation for observing you.

However, soon you two would start dating.

William would probably never directly reveal his plans to you.

He would quietly ask you about it.

If you show the same spirit, William could reveal his plans at some point.

This would also provide an interesting challenge.

William would try his best to be as unsuspicious as possible.

Every day he would be grateful for your laziness.

One Sherlock is a solid opposition, but two Sherlocks would really be too much.

[pitviperofdoom]

Tell me about your Mycroft on Enola Holmes opinions please! I also have opinions about his characterization in the movie :) they’re not nice opinions but I otherwise enjoyed the movie

Yeah overall I enjoyed both Enola Holmes movies but this One Thing made me mad and I'm gonna bitch about it under the readmore.

I spent every scene he was in wanting to eat glass, his characterization made me so angry. It's almost impressive how they utterly failed to make Mycroft Mycroft-like at pretty much every possible angle.

Is Mycroft Holmes a misanthrope? Absolutely. But that doesn't mean he's an angry, hostile asshole who treats everyone like shit, it means he avoids people. Like here he is going out of his way to be unpleasant, as if Mycroft Holmes has ever in his life gone out of his way to do anything. This man has computer brain and lives at a club where he can sit in a corner and not talk to people because he can't be arsed to participate in polite society, and you want me to believe he's wringing his hands over his sister not participating in polite society? No sir I am not buying what you're trying to sell me.

Mycroft with a young lady in his charge would basically be Mr. Bennet from Pride and Prejudice--he'd be shutting himself away with books and puzzles and occasionally laughing at the antics from a safe distance.

Honestly the final nail in the coffin was when the maid character flat out told Sherlock that Mycroft didn't have the same spark of genius as him and Enola, he's basically a weird angry OC at that point because Mycroft's entire character is "smarter genius than sherlock, but lazy."

I also have a couple of minor gripes about Sherlock's character: First, Enola tells him that he can deal with the "hoits and toits" while she takes care of the common people, when in the original stories Sherlock's whole thing was taking cases from regular people with problems that the police either couldn't or wouldn't address. Second, the part in the first movie where Enola gets slapped by the school headmistress and immediately runs to her brothers and they blow her off? You're telling me Sherlock Holmes wouldn't take one look at her and know someone just hit her, or that he'd let it slide if he did? The man who told Violet Hunter in the Copper Beeches that Rucastle's job offer was shady as hell and he wouldn't allow a hypothetical sister of his to take it? That Sherlock Holmes???

Rest of the movie was fine though. And the second one was good because Mycroft wasn't in it.

[user-needs-new-hyperfixation]

Hello, can I ask what do you mean "in canon it's impossible for Sherlock to settle down with a woman"? Like, as a fan of Holmes and always read the books since middle school, I'm kinda confuse here, I don't mean anything negative. Sorry, do you think Poirot (from Agatha Christie) is also queer?

Maybe because I grew up with very religious mother and lived in anti-LGBTQ country, I'm kinda slow in picking up subtext. Like until now I'm still kinda confuse with my friend who have ships from any fandoms (but I still love to hear and read her headcanons or fics about those characters)....

I really agree with you, I've seen many Holmes' adaptations (cartoon, tv series, manga) but Yuumori is clearly the closest to Doyle's works. Do you think the mangaka also love to read Holmes' books?

Story time! (Welcome to "Hyper answers asks like an old lady going on an hour long barely-on-topic tangent at the slightest prompting.)

I totally get where you're coming from, I was raised in like...knockoff Southern Baptist churches. Growing up, homosexuality was presented to me as a sexual perversion incapable of involving real love. It's kind of silly, but it's true: a ship was a big part of changing that for me. I read Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle as a teenager, and Kurogane and Fai had something that was inescapably romantic and beautiful but never strictly sexual (tho the potential is certainly there). Between that and an online community of LGBTQ+ adults who were incredibly patient and kind towards me even when I was suuuuper ignorant, I started to open up towards queer relationships as...well, just relationships. Relationships that can encompass sex and also encompass love and friendship and communication and partnership and all those other things I'd been taught were exclusive to monogamous straight people. And then, even as terrified as I was, I was eventually able to face the fact that I'd always had crushes on girls just as often as crushes on guys. So yeah, there's a reason Kurofai is my ship of all ships, the actual One True Pairing for me. Because it cracked open a door just enough that I could slowly lever it open the rest of the way. There seem to be quite a lot of anecdotes like this: women enjoying BL/mlm ships is often seen as fetishy (which can certainly be part of it) but for some reason I can't fully articulate it also seems to sometimes be a means for girls and women to explore their own not-straightness.

ANYWAY. SHERLOCK HOLMES. Tbh I'm not gonna go too in-depth because I would bet good money that there are a bunch of scholarly articles on Holmes' queerness. People have probably done their doctorate theses on this! Much smarter and more well-read folks than I have already covered the topic. For me, it really boils down to: he never outright expresses sexual or romantic interest in anyone (we must resist the urge to assume his respect for Irene Adler is romantic just because he is a man and she is a woman). He's almost certainly on the asexual spectrum. But when he does exhibit symptoms one might associate with romantic and/or sexual interest (particularly romantic, imo), it's always towards men (usually Watson, of course). For example, notable flirt John Watson saying that Holmes blushes at his compliments the way a girl does is...suggestive.

The whole thing is complicated by Watson being (in my opinion at least) an unreliable and sometimes downright petty narrator. He keeps going on spiels about Holmes being cold and heartless, only to turn around and describe him greeting his friends warmly and being emotionally moved by music and baby-talking puppies and charming old ladies. It makes Watson sometimes come across as one of those allo people who are so unable to conceive of a life without romantic and/or sexual desire that they start dehumanizing those who don't experience it. Alternatively and maybe more charitably, he just has a big ol' crush on Holmes, is understandably alarmed by it given the time period, and gets bitchy and defensive when he feels it might not be reciprocated.

But ultimately...do I think Arthur Conan Doyle sat down at a desk in the late 19th century/early 20th century and was like "I am going to write some ace queer representation for the tumblr girlies (gn)"? Obviously not. 😅 I do think he might have set out to create a character who very deliberately did not need to have the otherwise almost obligatory straight romantic side-plot. Holmes is never in any way set up as having a life headed towards marriage and children, in spite of how typical that was for the time. The companionship he does express a need and desire for comes in the form of another man. He's "lost without [his] Boswell." He sneakily buys Watson's practice out from under him so he'll be free to move back in and go on more adventures with him. He threatens violence when Watson is hurt. Etc etc. I think it's very fair to interpret it all through a queer lens, the quibble would be more in whether that queerness ever manifests sexually.

I definitely think the Yuumori creators have not only read ACD but also other fiction based on the stories, possibly even including some very old pastiches like this one. I love how seemingly nerdy they are about it haha! The series is full of easter eggs and callouts to other Holmesian works.

As for Poirot, I know very little about the character beyond a few episodes of the show I watched as a young'un, but that is not the mustache of a straight man (I'm joking I'm joking I have absolutely no opinion on that one! 🤣)

Thanks for the ask, and for actually reading this ramble if you got this far! 😅

[idiopathicsmile]

hey I loved the third episode of world gone wrong!! the perfect mix of silly and serious, and the character dynamics are perfect <3 I have one question! did you have anything in mind for what malik's poem might have been? what's his style, what kind of a poet is he?

hi! thank you so much for this ask! i love writing for this show and the third episode of World Gone Wrong holds a special place in my heart because i think it's the first time you the audience fully realize just how ride-or-die the two hosts are for each other.

what a great question! in the case of the snippet of poem you hear on the show, it's sort of written as a loose carl sandburg pastiche. it's an interesting challenge to write a character who is canonically a talented poet because while i do write poems on the rare occasion a poem-shaped idea grabs me (and in fact that particular quote on the show i cannibalized from a longer piece i'd written a while back), i don't write much poetry and i have more confidence in my skills at pretty much every other form of creative writing.

it's a similar challenge to writing a character who is much smarter than me. like, in a words-based medium, how hard can i dance around the conjuring of sentences which must create the illusion of something that is by definition beyond me? (different writers grapple with this in different ways. for an example of how maybe not to do this, see bbc sherlock in its later series.)

but the thing about faking intelligence is, as you sit there at your computer, writing the words, you're free to do research on topics your character knows well. it is hard to fake creativity and skill. so at this point, i'm only really comfortable showing something malik has written if it's a joke. i'm a lot more confident in my punchlines than my poetry.

we did talk a little about malik's writing amongst the producers and the actors. slam poetry definitely came up at some point. i also think that since malik's work often centers questions of identity and performance and the self, he is very comfortable doing pastiches across a wide variety of styles if that helps make his point. on some level, a lot of poetic style is a kind of performance, i think.

idk, this is one of those aspects of the show where i'm really excited that other writers will be able to play with these characters in the future. it is my hope that at some point we'll get to hear more of his work.

@worldgonewrongpod, you are also welcome to weigh in here!

[data-expunged-0]

Apex Predator

Yeah, this is a rewrite of that shitty pred!tommy fic that I wrote a while back.

Anyways, this fic contains soft, safe vore, mentioned fatal vore(don't worry nobody dies in this), angst, and vague threats. Don't like, don't read.

Also, THIS IS ABOUT THE CANON CHARACTERS, NOT THE CREATORS For those of you who can't tell the difference, canon Dream, or c!Dream, is the one who was tortured in a prison. Content creator Dream, or cc!Dream, is the one who does 3v1 Minecraft manhunt rematches every other day.

You scrambled through the forest as Sam chased after you, rain pitter-pattering on the muddy ground. "Just stop running already! Quackity and I just want to talk!" You knew damn well Sam was lying. If he 'just wanted to talk', then he wouldn't have his trident out.

The event was clear in your mind. You owned a home near Quackity's casino in Las Nevadas, and Quackity had called you, asking you to come to his office one last time to have a 'friendly chat.' He then threw a weird, cyan splash potion that shrank you to a fraction of your height and ordered Sam to kill you.

You couldn't outrun Sam. You knew you couldn't. He was far faster than you could ever be. But that didn't mean he was smarter.

Well, he probably was smarter, but he relied on some sort of thermal vision to find keep track of where you were going. He was never much of a tracker, so he had to be tracking something that wasn't scent, since the gas mask would throw that off. Your eyes darted around the forest floor, desperately looking for something you could throw at him or something. You then spotted a puddle of mud.

I saw a guy do this in a toothpaste ad once, you thought to yourself as you covered yourself in mud. You grimaced at its weird texture as it partially dried, but it was either that or getting caught by Sam.

Sam slowed to a stop near you, looking around and sniffing the air. Eventually, he walked right past you, continuing his search. You breathed a sigh of relief once he was out of earshot, but then you heard footsteps. Loud footsteps. And... crying?

Suddenly, Tommyinnit burst through some nearby foliage. From what you'd heard, Dream was messing with Tommy while he was in exile. By the looks of it, Dream had taken things too far.

Unlike Sam, who relied on thermal vison to see you, Tommy spotted you almost immediately. "Reader? Is that you? What are you doing here?" "I- long story."

Suddenly, you heard paws impacting against the muddy ground. Sam was coming back. He'd probably heard you and Tommy talking. Tommy could tell from the fear in your eyes that you needed to hide.

Tommy went through his options in his head. He could shove you in his pocket and run, but Sam would hear him. He could put you in his hoodie pocket, but Sam would hear him and his favorite hoodie would be ruined. There was only one more option, but you wouldn't like it.

"Reader, I have an idea on how we can get out of here, but you need to trust me." "Okay. What's the plan?" "There's no time to explain. You're completely sure that you trust me?" "Yes! Now hurry up!"

Tommy grabbed you with both hands, and you immediately regretted telling him to hurry up. He haphazardly shoved you in his mouth, licking the mud off your clothes and face as you tried not to scream, desperately hoping he wasn't going to do what you thought he was.

Those hopes were immediately crushed as his tongue guided you to the back of his mouth and towards his throat, you bit your tongue until it bled to keep yourself from screaming.

You slid down his esophagus and into his stomach with a wet plop. There, you cried as quietly as you could, hearing Tommy talk to Sam.

"Tommy, have you seen Reader anywhere? I was just looking for them." "Nope. Sorry, big man."

Sam sighed, then walked away. Tommy tried to find a spot next to the tree that wasn't muddy. He sat down, resting one hand on his stomach.

"Alright, so I've got a bit of explaining to do." "No shit, sherlock! What made you think that was a good idea?!" "I dunno, man! I was just..."

Tommy sighed. He didn't really have a good answer. He just knew it would be safe somehow. Neither of you really cared how. Tommy sat under the tree, purring as he started to doze off...

[mzannthropy]

Okay, so I've just rewatched the parts of Enola Holmes with Sam Claflin and:

Mycroft had a point about Enola looking like a mess at the train station (she fell off a bike)

this version of Mycroft is so cartoonish it hurts, but not knowing what a tennis racquet is was going a bit too far--you overdid it, writers (reminder than in canon, Mycroft was smarter than Sherlock)

he's right to be concerned where the money he was sending his mother was going. As far as we can tell from the film, he has been doing it for 10 years and until now has not questioned her

"I'm not the villain here." That's right, you're not, you're a plot device.

if it's really his house, then he has a right to say it is his house

Enola drew a caricature of him--quite appropriate as that's what he was

Enola presents Mycroft as much worse than he is, bc she perceives him that way--Sherlock seems to like him and gets on with him okay

Mycroft calling Sherlock "little brother" must have been fun for Sam, as that's how he refers to his younger brother Joe, who is also an actor (though Sam also has two older brothers!)

it looks like Sam enjoyed this role, so at least he had fun, if nothing else

[oldmanmuffins]

Moriarty the Patriot.

Recommended for anyone who wants to eat the rich with very pretty boys. Be gay, do crimes.

Content warnings: In the first few episodes there is violence against children. It is mostly off screen but worth mentioning. The show is not brutal, but there is violence throughout that isn't bloodless/fantasy.

What it is: Fall 2020 crime drama following professor Moriarty of Sherlock Holmes fame as he takes on the british aristocracy. You will see there are two seasons, but it's one continuous piece with the big finale being at the end of the second season and a seamless transition from one to the next. In the way of a lot of anime it mostly stops shy of being explicitly gay, but that's clearly how its meant to be read.

What is it trying to do? Eating the rich is the spirit of the show. The British Aristocracy are our main villains and we're not interested in a nuanced take on the matter. Moriarty is our antihero protagonist and stays true to form as a criminal mastermind with no compunctions about using violence. Our other interest is a cast of mostly pretty male characters. Its mostly for eye candy rather than romance, though we do have a Moriarty x Holmes fated canon ship growing throughout. Mystery solving takes a back seat. The mood here is more raucous, a bit like the Robert Downey Sherlock with a bit more camp.

How ambitious is it? Not very, we're mostly here for a good time. The show is very visually dependent so the art needs to be above average to work. Since we're borrowing Doyle's characters, there's some effort at making them seem smart and the crimes be mysterious, but its brazenly perfunctory. Theree is a challenge in managing the tone and keeping things entertaining. We will be killing people so the tone is going to be a bit dark. At the same time, we want some of the killing to be fun and satisfying. If its too dark, we're going to feel miserable. If its not dark enough, we're not going to be on for the ride.

How well does it succeed? I had a blast. The show sets the hurdles low so it can sashay over them. I've not historically been a bishonen connoiseur but the characters are ridiculously pretty. Moriarty looks like the blonde reincarnation of Sebastian from Black Butler. Sherlock makes people want to do crimes just so they can be caught. I also enjoyed a lot of what was done with the background art and remember pausing a few times to look at details.

The villains are comically evil and them being brought down is satisfying every time. Hating on aristocrats is a perfect mood for the 2020's so its good catharsis. The violence is made palatable by a pervasive over the top edgy asthetic and by how blunt the show is about what its doing; if the show tried to be smarter or more reserved, the illusion would shatter.

The pacing is good. We start with a few serial-style mini arcs, but quickly start working our way into a larger continuous story with ever-increasing stakes. Things also get progressively more fantastic. The early episodes feel more grounded in reality and in Doyle's literary world, but by the end anything could happen and you're ready to gleefully accept it.

Its just a romp. It manages to be dumb fun without making you feel dumb for having fun watching it.

[terramythos]

Guards! Guards! by Terry Pratchett Reading Notes

Full Review Here!

-I've never read anything by Terry Pratchett outside Good Omens (ages ago) 

-Discworld has always been on The List so I followed the general "just pick one" recommendation 

-no chapters :0 here's hoping I organize these notes in a coherent way 

-probably just rando page breaks tbh  

-ok putting a characters drunk rambling in the narration is pretty good. Like drunkenness and blurring state of mind etc 

-oh boy. Footnotes 

-"all this was untrue" oh good. *proceeds to describe something more insane* oh GOOD. 

-... oh no, it IS funny. 

-God the back and forth of nonsense pass codes 

-oh my god the punchline being not just that but they're at the WRONG secret society 😭 

-and the switch to just ordinary pleasantries. With the dramatically grim tone otherwise. Help 

- nooooo another person was at the wrong one. Boomerang-ass joke 

-youve done it, you've broken down megalomaniacal villains to their bare essentials! 

-ok it dawned on me their titles are their professions. Lmao. Brother Plasterer literally a Plasterer. 

-thunder rolled... a six 

-the sword being unique because it's not obnoxiously prophetic/magical 

-"it's a terrible thing to be nearly sixteen and the wrong species" brother, ain't that the truth 

-wait. This is the premise of Elf. Hello? 

-damn, dwarves a bunch of nonbinary kings I guess 

-I like that the word "king" is nonliteral, at least in the way we would think it, but by technicality fits the prophecy shit or w/e 

-"You have to know all the laws to be a good officer" ooooog 

-oops! You're a dragon now 

-thieves threatening to strike lmao 

-"do not let me detain you" brooo lmao 

-thieves having state sponsored organized and licensed crime with annual quotas! So like. The actual cops, not The Watch 

-ok I'm not the only one seeing the poop jokes right. "Back to front way of living." "Sergeant Colon." Vimes enters the story basically in the sewer. 

-If The Fantasy Noir Aesthetic Was Not Obvious Enough Here Is A Magic Glowing Sign That Is Flickering Random Letters 

-nicotine elephants graveyard? Where did he come up with this shit lmao 

-there are a lot of boomerang jokes 

-oh boy them giving Carrot a drink. Like hes not a biological dwarf but. Uhhh 

-ok this has a lot of good bits. But one of my faves wasn't actually a joke. "There were some types of sobriety that you just couldn't budge." So true bestie 

-is the Patrician also the Supreme Grand Master? 

-ok probs not based on that line. And wouldn't make sense based on the SGM's motivation 

-sybil ramkin token chick but also. GIRLBOSS 

-i don't often say this but the sex jokes are really good lmao 

-there are so many good lines that I have to hold myself back but. "A group of swamp dragons was a slump, or an embarrassment" 

-"and then they realized." What a transitional statement 

-"it dawned on him that he was very probably a flawed character" like hello? 

-okay, I like the contrast between Vimes' alcoholism and the SGM saying "I can give it up any time I like" about summoning the dragon. 

-though side detail, It's interesting we havent actually seen him control the dragon from his perspective 

-a little funny that the currency is just dollars 

-"the curious incident of the orangutan in the nighttime" we getting Sherlock Holmes references now 

-the implication it isn't a "real dragon" but it's effect seems to be. Is the SGM transforming into one 

-one thing I like but didn't necessarily expect is there's sobering seriousness throughout the story 

-and sometimes the serious bits are told like a joke. You know? 

-all the innuendo with vimes and ramkin is so fucking funny dude 

-vimes sympathizing with the swamp dragons 🥺

-"in another few hours, the sun will rise"-ass line 

-oh the use of typeface 

-fucking MORPHIC RESONANCE, Terry?! 

-oh good to know New Orleans and Rio are Discworld-canon. 

-halfway point of the book and there's a bookend with a rainy night 

-I like that vimes is way smarter than he or the narrative give him credit for cause he's also Just Some Guy 

-oh i like that the summoning goes both ways. Uh oh! 

-ok is this an extended balls joke or am I extremely immature 

-my totally batshit theory: the watch guy who died (Gaskin) is the Supreme Grand Master 

-im so ffxiv brain poisoned but "noble dragons don't have friends. The nearest they can get to the idea is an enemy who is still alive." IF you know you know 

-Lady Ramkin is so fucking cool she just grabbed the horses out of the mist and dragged them back what the fuck 😭

-you know shit about to get real when the Death typeface shows up 

-t-time travel is it? 

-the number of times this printing has typoed Vimes as "Vines" 

-the story has made many comparisons about the dragon's behavior being "practically human", but when we got the dragon's perspective it was more that it had an intelligence that pre-dated anything anthropomorphic so I'm not sure what to think on that 

-the giant fucking dragon hanging from the ceiling like a bat is pretty funny though 

-Oh This Is An Allegory For Capitalism. I See. 

-well this took a turn from light hearted fantasy-flavored ribbing to uh. Kinda horrific! I'm a little impressed tbh 

-oh my god WONSE was the Supreme Grand Master. That just hit. 

-ok well played, he was kind of a prick, and way over qualified for a SECRETARY position 

-and he got that extra characterization for seemingly no reason 

-... AND his flat denial about the dragon being back and his anger at Vimes for it. This makes a lot of sense. 

-I guess you could make the argument "wolf in sheep's clothing" since his surname is literally Lupine 

-The Poop Jokes Are Back, But No One Is Laughing Now 

-okay the previous scene makes it seem like the dragon is coming up with this horrifying arrangement itself. And now we learn it's really Wonse trying to make it "better". 

-but my honest and genuine surprise at the dragon REALIZING this, and its actual HORROR at how horrible people can be by nature. WOOF. 

-so I guess that's the "almost human" connection cause. No it's not. That's just how people read and projected it. 

-"we [dragons] never burned amd tortured and ripped one another apart and called it morality" like hello??? This is so dark all of a sudden 

-I guess the comedic tone elsewhere lets Terry sneak this shit in and make it stick especially hard. 

-^ this is nothing but praise, to be clear. I've read a lot of "silly-humorous but with darker moments" work but this might be the best example I've read so far. 

-did we need a canon explanation/justification of Vimes being an alcoholic? 

-ALTHOUGH. isn't that like. Lack of natural alcohol an actual thing? Am I insane? I swear I've heard of that before. 

-like I'm sure missing natural dopamine production which means I do need to take stimulants to function but I'm not sure if that's comparable 

-not to over analyze this but that sort of implies drinking doesn't even make him drunk unless he has way too much which adds some interesting context to previous bits. 

-in before it was literally just a joke 

-If You Somehow Didn't Figure Out It Was Wonse We Are Spelling It Out Here 

-oh shit he said the line 

-I am just shocked that the one token female character is the designated sacrifice, lol. At least she's a GOOD character 

-I will be a little annoyed if she's just a damsel in distress for vimes, considering she just charged six guards with a broadsword and only lost cause one of them tripped her 

-ok the bit about the Patrician and the rat unlocked a forbidden memory of me reading like one chapter of a YA novel in the Discworld series when I was like. Ten 

-i don't remember what it was called lmao 

-one bit I liked in the arrest scene is it was very trope-referential, like literally naming what a hero is supposed to do in a scene like this. But unlike say 90% of adult animation, it actually like. Made a joke of it. "There IS no fireplace!" 

-like the bar is low but YES! JUST BEING AWARE OF THE TROPE ISNT A JOKE! YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING WITH IT! THANK YOU! 

-"never build a dungeon you wouldn't be happy to spend the night in yourself" ok Patrician kind of based actually 

-the sudden strange implication (?) that one can see a thousand miles away with how the Discworld is structured? It might have been metaphorical 

-i love the whole bit about million-to-one odds always working (like the cliche), but then the rank rethinking the actual odds as way better, so now they have to do something to make their odds of success worse 

-the fucking bit being they don't make the million to one shot at the dragon but DO make the million to one chance of surviving being hit by its flame. My god. 

-oh my god errol is farting flame to fly??? Like a rocket? INSANE. 

-ok is that one Tumblr comic about the wolf  needing to get lucky only once literally from a line in this book. I guess there might be something they're both referencing that I just don't know 

-oh my god the twist of the dragon being female. I guess I take the comment back about Lady Ramkin being the only one. Lmao. 

-Shrek moment? 

-i like that explaining Errol's weird behavior and how he like. Decides he has to. Court her? I guess? That's pretty funny. 

-ok I basically chalked and dismissed The Patrician as just like, a Lawful Evill Ruler type but he has a fun amount of depth. 

-ok I like the echo of "Guards! Guards!" as the title line summoning the protagonists this time 

-ive resisted saying it but I have to now. Carrot autistic king 

-Vimes telling the Patrician to shut up. Character growth 

-"killed by a... metaphor" ... "looked like the ground to me" RAW ASS LINE 

-ok this was earlier but I forgot to note it. I like that textually we know Vimes doesn't choose swords because he associates them with heroes. And when he decides to go to the palace for Wonse, he asks for Carrot's sword. 

-"is that you, Brother Doorkeeper? METAPHORICALLY, it said." RAW ASS LINE!!!

-ok. The whole monologue about all of humanity being evil like. Man if that isn't how I feel, sometimes. It's a little cathartic to read. Evil not because they say yes, but because they don't say no. Yeah... 

-is this the first time we've heard Vimes' first name? Book almost over? 

-CASABLANCA? Fucking Casablanca? 

-well that was pretty good! I'll need to think and organize my thoughts 

[ninjakittenarmy]

https://www.tumblr.com/ninjakittenarmy/753655920758784000/astonishes-me-that-the-guy-who-who-exposed-two-of

Having a petty grudge against a show and its creator while also trying to pretend you "respect" them so people don't recognize how much you're lying tends to do that to a person.

Like it's just exceptionally hard to believe he actually cares or respects the series despite his Twitter posts claiming to do so, because it's just nakedly obvious he's doing that to maintain his image of being "respectable" and "intelligent".

And the other reality is that he's frankly, at least from my perspective, a person who tends to go after the low-hanging fruit. Sherlock, Fallout's Bethesda-era games, RWBY...these are all things that had controversial reputations, which made them easy fodder to be looked down on, and thus easy to build credibility on.

It's telling that when he tries to talk about something that isn't as easy of a target (some of his political views are complete nonsense if you understand anything about civics or geopolitics) or is infinitely more complex and doesn't easily slot into the low-hanging fruit section of things, he sounds like a complete tool and idiot trying to sound smarter than he actually is.

I’m not entirely sure about the Sherlock stuff since most fans of that show seem to agree with his take on it, but other than that yeah, it’s mostly rage bait and honestly, I can’t get over how he used the “the show betrayed Monty’s vision” line when Miles and Kerry have been helping plan the story since day one and have been basing the show off Monty’s own notes he left behind. HBomb prides himself on his research. He usually delivers. But he didn’t do his research here, and it shows.

[rauhallinen-hauki]

i don't think anyone is going to read this but if you somehow find this post and happen to be a f//ury road fan and/or dont want technically-but-not-really-spoilers for furiosa then please keep scrolling. im just rambling ok

i got tired of eyeing thru my peripheral vision all those click-baity article headers that go "furiosa is good but not nearly as good as f//ury road" or "furiosa is a shit movie and f//ury road is much better", all boiling down to "furiosa is a movie that is different from f//ury road". which doesnt really say anything.

so i went to see furiosa. is it considered bad because it is somehow worse than f//ury road, or is it considered bad because it is... you know, a good movie (like those of the original mad max trilogy that are also considered bad by modern standard)? i wanted to find out. you can always walk out of the theater if its a bad movie. or you can be positively surprised. i tend to "go blind" into these things anyway

and to my surprise, i actually liked it. and i can see why its flopping: unlike f//ury road, it doesnt throw shit at the screen every damn second, it has actual, good pacing that never feels like it drags on, well-choreographed action, dialogue that doesnt feel forced. its a good movie.

a decent movie??? in the capitalistic, soulless hellscape of the entertainment industry that is 2024??? un-fucking beliveable. (in a good way)

i loved how much more quieter and smarter it was compared to f//ury road. more psychological instead of over the top annoying pointless action 100%. i also like how they got more creative with the vehicles without going too over the top. since im a motorcycle hoe i was specially fond of the bikes and the prevalence of them compared to f//ury road. in fact the only mayor issue i have with this movie (that isn't really the movie's fault and more of a stupid dare-i-say-marketing decision) is that they just had to edit scenes from f//ury road into the credits sequence. because hey, isnt f//ury road the MAIN story? don't you remember how good f//ury road was?? don't you want to go rewatch the much more popular and critically aclaimed f//ury road in case you're dissapointed with this prequel story???

like no shit sherlock, i think everyone who went to see this movie knew that it was a prequel to f//ury road, even if they hadn't seen it. and the thing is, even while being tied to f//ury road's storyline, this movie stands on its own. you know, kind of like how the original mad max trilogy works? like damn just let furiosa be its own thing if youre going to market it like that ffs. but again, its just a dumb thing at the end that you can cut out

so the tldr is sometimes its good to take a gamble. you win some you lose some but thats the way life is anyway. i happened to win this time. i went to see a movie without expectations knowing full well it could end in massive, f//ury road-flavored dissapointment, but instead got to see a good movie. not a masterpiece to me, but a good, still passion-driven movie nevertheless. and that is rare nowadays

anyway as a last note i find it funny and also sad how the general concensus is that furiosa's flop means that the mad max series is going to end. to me it would be fantastic, because it means that we dont run the risk of another shitty f//ury road-esque movie (and i just want closure. just let another good post apo film series exist please im desperate). but this also means that we won't be getting more movies going in furiosa's style

ok thats it back to thirsting over 80s harleys and kawasakis

[saminthea]

Anyone else completely obsessed with the new Enola Holmes movie? Like I was fully expecting a fun, pseudo historic pop feminist romp and instead I got...

"Hey big companies are corrupt and *will* straight up kill people for profit. And also the system is really ill equipped to deal with that kind of corruption, the best and often only way to instill change is through worker's collective action."

Which is like. Good soup!

On top of that the Holmes' mom is part of a group that destroys property in protest for women's rights, and it's treated like, morally quirky at worst? Most media with these types of characters pull the "you're just as bad as your oppressors for resorting to violence" bs. But here it's just "yeah, that's Mom lol!"

Also basic no think bonus points for actually including dark skinned black women. Lots of modern 'diverse' historical fiction has a lot of trouble with that.

Also can I just gush about how much I *adore* this iteration of Moriarty? She's so well portrayed with that perfect "smarter than everyone in this room, life's a game, let's play" vibe. She's suave and soft spoken and so obviously delighted by having found a 'worthy' opponent in Sherlock. I can't wait to see her again.

Also it might be the lingering middle school Sherlock fangirl in me but when they introduced Dr. John Watson I just about *screamed*.

Overall, A+ movie. Thoroughly enjoyed myself and I didn't even have to turn my brain off to do it.

[dangertoozmanykids101]

Now.... You would not be surprised if he betrayed you - BUT you would also expect that he had a plan. He definitely wouldn't just leave you to be killed. Would he?

No. Of course no not. You two are a team! After he secures the prize, he'll use some masterful and elaborate plan of distraction, then slip you out through the backdoor easily during the chaos.

When he did just that, you would have preferred that he cut the rope digging into wrists and ankles, but instead he just threw you over his shoulder and ran.

A rescue is a rescue. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth, and don't whine to a god about comfort during a life saving rescue - even if he was the cause for your capture.

That point is debatable, of course. No doubt the two of you will spend hours and hours and hours arguing the details at some point. Best leave that for another time.

Loki finally sat you down on a large fallen log. Immediately you remembered that your pants are gone - taken - and underwear was the only protection of your modesty below the belt. This fact was painfully clear as the rough damp bark scraped against your tender bottom and upper thighs.

"You didn't really think I'd leave you, did you?" His eyes sparkled with glee from a successful escape while his chest heaved only a little. That and a wet shine to his forehead were the only clues that he had jogged for a little over a mile through the woods with you over his shoulders in a fireman's hold.

"You let them shoot me with a poison dart!" Your speech was still slurred and your mouth droops on one side, but it was your best attempt at a venomous remark. You wince as Loki's hand reached up to wipe some drool off your cheek with your shirt. You relax and allow him after only a few moments of trying to challenge the stern look in his eyes.

"You're fine. My plan worked even better than I expected. They became very careless once they thought they were smarter than us. You are quite a yummy consolation prize," he leaned in to deeply sniff your hair. With a low growl he licked widely across the side of your neck and nipped your ear. His hands gripped your hips tighter when you jumped with a little squeak of surprise. "I hadn't expected them to be as preoccupied by your capture as they were, honestly."

"Ouch. What's that supposed to mean?"

His face shifted to your other ear, burying his nose even deeper into your hair, just moaning slightly, showing no intention to answer you.

"Are you going to untie my wrists and feet please?" Lifting your hands up, you tried to shove your bound wrists between his head and yours to bring his attention to the more urgent matter of escape.

Yet he still ignored you. "Did any of them touch you?"

"Well, yeah. They tied me up! Duh! And I lost my big heavy sweat shirt." You were beginning to feel chilly now wearing only a thin flimsy pastel pink tee-shirt. "... and obviously my pants too." A chill ran up your back and across your shoulder blades; you couldn't help but shiver.

Loki's head pulled away the second you said yes. He immediately began examining you - his hands gently but systematically gliding over your entire body. His face showed concern - worry even. "You sure you're not hurt?"

"No, I'm fine. The girls just brushed my hair really while the men just sat and stared between me and the phone - waiting for it to ring maybe? Were you supposed to call?" Fortunately he appeared too distracted checking you over to catch your little white lie. Loki didn't need to know what else happened.

He's fingers grazed over your breasts and your nipples responded immediately. Loki of course didn't miss this little pop of excitement. A wicked smile grew over his face. The look he gave you looked even more hungry than a starving wolf with no food.

"You're feeling quite chilly."

No shit Sherlock.

@caffiend-queen @nildespirandum @so-easy-to-love-me @deceitfuldevout @nonsensicalobsessions @muddyorbsblr @the-haven-of-fiction @latent-thoughts @talklokitome @emeraldrosequartz @boredbrooder @mooncat163 @alexakeyloveloki

[joanquill]

Smart!Reader Headcanons

What William and Sherlock would be like with someone cleverer than them.

Sherlock Holmes and William James Moriarty

Okay, when William and Sherlock found out someone was on the same level of intellect as them, let alone SMARTER, they were very intrigued.

These men are competitive. You will not change my mind.

From a game of chess, solving mysteries, and answering riddles, they are relentless when challenging you.

It's kind of cute, actually, like a couple of kids who found a new playmate.

But sometimes it feels like you're an older sibling dealing with your younger brothers :)

Speaking of older siblings, Mycroft and Albert were just as astounded when they knew about you.

Mycroft's not as competitive as Sherlock, but he has challenged you to a match here and there.

And Albert was just intrigued with you, sharing wine here and there, and you're always his plus one at balls, saying he now has someone to talk to about things other than statuses and wealth.

Are Will and Sherl tiring? Sometimes.

Especially when Sherlock makes himself at home in your own house, excited to solve a mystery with you, or William is already inside, waiting for you to hear your thoughts on a book he's been reading over a cup of tea.

How do they get in? Sherlock picks the lock, and William has a spare key for some reason.

They like bringing you around during cases and hearing your opinion.

When you solve something before them, you can see in their eyes how much they admire and respect you.

But they play it off, saying they knew the same time you did and give you their compliments.

As rumbunctious as they are, you were also glad to find people who were like you.

[silentauroriamthereal]

Let me know if you're sick of this topic by now, but I saw a post about Sherlock and Irene and it reminded me how confused I still am about ASIB. What was the point of making Irene a lesbian if they were going to make her fall in some way for Sherlock? It seems like the whole point is to showcase John's feelings for Sherlock, which is insane considering what we know about the writers. And I'm not sure what to make of Sherlock's reaction, both to her and to her supposed death.

Hey! Sorry this took me a second (lol) to answer! I'm not at all sick of discussing any of this, ha!

So first, we have to consider that Steven Moffat, who wrote this episode, is a misogynist. I could write you a whole entire essay about that, but to summarize, he writes women *very* differently from the way he writes men. Every "strong woman" character he's written (to the extent that I've experienced, at least) tends to exert her strength through violence. Irene literally hurts men to extort them for information for her terrorist boss. Being on the "side of the angels" doesn't matter if you're sexy or cute or female in general. Irene was fully down to sell out her entire country to save her own skin and was working directly for the man Sherlock and John spend several series actively opposing. But Irene is a woman, so it doesn't count. There are dozens of other examples - Molly slapping Sherlock in a moment of "strength", in some misguided sense of entitlement that told her she had the right to demand an explanation for Sherlock's drug usage, and while I don't even want to wade into the steaming heap which is Moffat's writing on Doctor Who, I'll just point out that their darlings, River Song and Mary Moffat, are both assassins. I never did understand the complicated reasoning behind River Song's "need" to kill the Doctor, and Mary never once even offers a reason for choosing a career path in murder for personal gain. She also never exhibits any sort of remorse for any of it, including all the parts that affected her "beloved" John, like lying to him endlessly, abandoning their infant to protect herself, comparing him to a dog, denying him permission to go somewhere without her, and also trying to murder his best friend. It only makes sense that a canonical lesbian would be powerless to retain her sexuality in the face of an attractive, intelligent man. Because that's how sexuality works!

So that's reason #1. Reason #2 is that Sherlock shows his "humanity" in weakness: by making mistakes. His "mistake" in this one was, apparently, slightly falling for Irene, despite knowing that she worked for Moriarty, despite knowing that she was a lesbian, despite knowing that she absolutely betrayed him, and despite not actually being interested in her in a sexual way at all. John literally left the house (in a jealous snit) to let them be alone together, and Irene was all over the notion of them having sex, yet Sherlock spent the entire time lost in case reflections, and only snapped out of it when he realized that John had left. I don't know if they were trying to underscore his eccentricity or something, but that's partly where the weakness (or laziness, but same difference) in their writing comes in, that it's not abundantly clear to us after all this time. Series 2 aired in 2014, and here we are, eight years later and still going, "so yeah, wtf??" They use Sherlock's "weakness" again in failing to deduce Mary's past, along with his miscalculation about Magnussen, etc. Every time something bad happens from series 3 onward, it's definitely Sherlock's fault, and everyone else in the world is smarter than he is, all of a sudden.

Better writers would have made it much clearer that Sherlock was intrigued by the intellectual puzzle that Irene posed, that he'd kept her phone as a bit of a trophy for having outwitted her (which again is misogyny; Irene Adler outwitted Sherlock in the original ACD), and not had him "mourning" after her supposed death. I mean, Sherlock was visibly upset when the woman in TGG was killed as he listened over the phone. There's reason to think he might have been upset to learn of another person's death, someone he had met and sparred with. But it was always ONLY Irene who made things sexual or implied intent, never Sherlock. It's bad writing, honestly. I think they really like the idea of making Sherlock some sort of Bond who can woo every woman within 900 meters, but also that he's a dork with no social skills, and the mix sometimes works well and sometimes really doesn't.

I don't know if that was coherent at all, but that's the five cents my brain rummaged around and found. :P What do you think?

[creativepromptsforwriting]

Hi!

Any dialogue ideas between two really smart people (Sherlock genius type) who are stupid when it comes to the other? Some sort of love-hate relationship, so insults kind of thing.

Example:

"Wow, I never thought you'd be stupid enough to try and do this"

"Well, you're here with me, so that makes you stupid too"

**A plus would be people's reactions upon seeing them be like this

Hi :)

Two smart and also stupid people in love

Coming right up! (I already liked your own prompt so I’m also putting it on the list.)

"Wow, I never thought you'd be stupid enough to try and do this.” "Well, you're here with me, so that makes you stupid too.”

“Is it really that hard for you to admit that I’m clever?” “Yes.”

“You’re saying that you’re only attracted to someone’s brain, but I totally caught you checking out my butt.”

“I still beat you that time at chess.” “You’re never going to let me live this down, right?”

“You’re smarter than you look.” “Is that a compliment for my intelligence or an insult for my looks?”

“You’re both so smart and yet so stupid.”

“How do I know if they like me like that?” “You would think that with your IQ you could figure this out on your own.”

“You must be the reason for global warming because you’re hot.” “Actually, it’s primarily because of too much carbon dioxide in the atmosphere.” (old prompt)

Have fun!

- Jana