#also I meant to add a “read more’ break thingy but I didn’t know how

[heartpascal]

I'M EVEN MORE DEVASTED NOW 😭 (i just watched the new mandalorian ep and i'm not gonna say anything anymore) AND THEN YOU POST THAT 😭 I AM SO DEPRESSED AND DEVASTATED 😭

i'm gonna add more to that thought and what if— joel or tommy was awake?

"Look at me, kid. LOOK AT ME!" "Open your eyes, please!" "NO!"

AND MARIA NO! MY MOTHER! 😭 HER BEING IN DENIAL AND TELLING TOMMY TO TELL HER THAT IT'S NOT TRUE! MY HEART 💔🥀 AND WHAT IF LIKE THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO HAVE DINNER TOGETHER AFTER THE PATROL AND IT JUST GOES— MARIA ASKING WHERE SHE IS AND TOMMY JUST—

"Don't you dare say that." "Tell me it's not true. Tell me it's not fucking true, please!" "...Maria."

I AM DEVASTED! JESSE! 😭😭 (he's probably gonna see her soon but we ain't gonna talk about that) ELLIE AND JOEL 😭 joel and maria just lost another child and i can hear that one song going "i told you once, i can't do this again, do this again, oh." AND THE WHOLE FAMILY JUST AVENGING HER WITH TOMMY GOING FIRST 😭 I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! 😭

songs that makes me devasted about this:

• as the world caves in - matt maltese

(i can absolutely see this as the title name if you ever expand on it and just know it's gonna break my heart 💔)

• hold on - chord overstreet

• you said you'd grow old with me - michael schulte

• fourth of july - sufjan stevens

(am i bringing this back? yes, yes i am. specifically; "the evil, it spread like a fever ahead. it was night when you died, my firefly." and "the hospital asked, 'should the body be cast?' before i say goodbye, my star in the sky.")

• walked through hell - anson seabra

• remember me - coco

• sorrow - sleeping at last

• touch - sleeping at last

• it's quiet uptown - hamilton

(this song is making me fall apart—)

THE LAST OF US PART 2 SPOILERS

i am currently just putting that as like a blanket warning and then gonna do keep reading thingys so hopefully people who don’t wanna see don’t see!! ( THIS WAS BEFORE I WROTE… ALL THIS. )

omg yes shhh i’ve only watched episode 1 of season 3 so far oopsies. i have so little time for mando AGH i wish i had more >:( but i also neglected sm homework last week oops so my own fault really

no because if JOEL was awake? and he watched that happen? i genuinely don’t know what he’d do. there’s two options, one of which we heard of after sarah died, and the other being he goes mad for revenge. (let’s pretend abby didn’t use like. a fucking shotgun on his leg and it was recoverable, shhhhh)

TOMMY. he’d be so torn. i don’t know what he’d do either!!! they would just be so fucking despondent. like what is even the point if r is gone? what are they meant to do now? and if he had to watch? if he watched, and wasn’t able to do anything? can you imagine the pain he’d be in after locking eyes with r, wondering if r would ever forgive him for this? tommy would absolutely blame himself. would blame himself for letting reader on patrols at all, for helping abby, for trusting this group that they didn’t know, for doing nothing when reader needed him to do something, anything, the most

you saw how tommy reacted in part 2 when abby threatened ellie, how he fucking yelled and screamed at ellie to leave. can you imagine how much he would yell and scream at abby to just leave reader alone, to just stop, please, don’t do this to her, she didn’t do anything

can you imagine how tommy would react if he found out why abby did it? how joel would react? how ellie would react?

lets think about this for a minute actually, because ellie would NEVER forgive joel. she wouldn’t. because she already hated him for what he did at the hospital, she was just barely coming to forgive him for it, and now not only did he take that away from her, but his actions also led to reader being killed. joel would never ever forgive himself, but neither would ellie.

hell, if joel went to seattle for revenge, i don’t think he’d be coming back no matter the outcome. it has to be said. what does he have left, anyway?

my dear, sweet maria. she would be so torn after her initial denial, because god does she want to avenge reader, she wants to tear them all apart for what they did to her, but then there’s this baby who needs her. tommy would be long gone, by then, anyway. she couldn’t orphan her child. but what about you?

and the blame she’d have for joel, too, if she found out?

joel would be having the absolute WORST time.

your dialogue for maria’s reaction is so so accurate too, and you can really see tommy just looking at her, saying her name, because there’s nothing else he can say.

and when tommy and maria’s son grows up, and he’s wondering why his dad left, and he doesn’t understand because he can’t remember reader. he doesn’t remember her looking after him, only has the names on the chalkboard that’s still set up on the mantle of the home he shares with his mother only. because maria wouldn’t welcome tommy back after he left. couldn’t. a part of her resents him for not saving r too, although she’d never say it out loud.

i wanna talk about jesse more but this is already long i’m sorry HAHAH so i will move on to my favourite thing. SONGS!!!

as the world caves in — i’m an awful person for immediately thinking about how joel’s world litch rally caved in (via the golf club to r’s head…) OK BUT FOR REAL NOW. i love this song. it hurts so bad. for all of them, the world had already ended. they’re living in post apocalyptic times for gods sake. but this… this is worse. this is their actual world falling apart before their very eyes.

i cant talk about hold on because i think i will actually break down in sobs and cries. but agreed. that song hurts so bad

you said you’d grow old with me — these lyrics hurt particularly bad if you relate them to jesse i think. and ellie actually. “we had plans, we had visions, now i can't see ahead” i’m crying and sobbing. they’d both be so empty. they wouldn’t know what to do with themselves. and they’d remember so many things they forgot to tell reader :( “you've got your peace now, but what about me?” SOBBIIIIINGGG. actually look at all of these lyrics because they all fit so well and they ALL hurt.

fourth of july — may i just also add “what could i have said to raise you from the dead?” because it makes me sad. and as you SHOULD bring this one back. it hurts. also the repeated “why do you cry” hurts so bad because not only will all the characters be sobbing but also r didn’t want to die :(

walk through hell — all of you go and look at EVERY single song lyric here. because ouch. like i’m in pain rn listening to this

remember me — “remember me though i have to say goodbye” yelling crying screaming sobbing. and also “remember me each time you hear a sad guitar” joel coded joel coded joel coded. he never got to teach r how to play even though she wanted to learn (shhh) and that would haunt him forever i think. or however long he lived..

sorrow — OUCH. all of this just hurts and then you have this especially joel coded line “slowly, then all at once / a single loose thread / and it all comes undone” sobs he lost everything. also i think this song really fits with how like. lost and unsure everybody would be going forward like “i feel out of focus / or at least indisposed” TBE MORE I LOOK AT THE LYRICS THE MORE I COULD PICK OUT THAT FIT SO WELL. howl you know what you’re doing. i should be mad. i should be.

touch — “all i want is to flip a switch / before something breaks that cannot be fixed” need i say more? no. i needn’t. but i will. “predicting god as best he can / but god i wanna feel again”

it’s quiet uptown — howl im gonna need you to stop using hamilton against me please and thank you. but this song is maria coded. THERE I SAID IT. it’s maria coded! “you hold your child as tight as you can / and push away the unimaginable” her with her son after tommy leaves too. she’s so stuck on the fact that she couldn’t protect r that she worries she won’t be able to protect him either. she can’t lose a third child. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY. “i spend hours in the garden / i walk alone to the store” TO READER’S STORE!!! TO THE POTTERY SHOP!!! imagine the pain maria would feel when all the flowers outside have wilted away, unreplaced, and then she has to throw them away. she’s alone. she’s so alone. i’m in pain. with everybody off avenging r who’s their to mourn her? everybody forgets about your shop soon enough, except for her. she cleans the shop, sends her son to be looked after by someone she trusts, only for a little while. she can’t manage long. AND THEN THE SECOND PART IS TOMMY CODED. “if i could spare [her] life / if i could trade [her] life for mine / [she’d] be standing here right now / and you would smile and that would be enough” …… i’m going into hibernation actually. howl HOW COULD YOU.

[ice-rift]

Ok so while rewatching Pinky and the Brain this scene in the episode “Snowball”, caught my attention. It’s in regards to Brains short stature and the fact he hardly grows at all from how he looks here as a adolescent.

I understand that Brain’s short stature is supposed to help show that Pinky who is tall in stature is his comedic foil. However Pinky is not the only mouse taller than Brain. All other mice (female and male) are taller than him as well.

I was curious to see if there could possibly be a scientific answer as to why. Now the things listed here are representations of health scares and experiments that had happened in the past.

DDT and ALAR are banned pesticides and Canal No5 (which is a play on Chanel No5) and Snipple (which represents Snapple) were at some point all tested on lab animals. Chanel No. 5 perfume was tested on the account of allergens being present within the perfume. Snapple was tested based on it containing aspartame, a dangerous food additive. And ALAR was supposedly linked to cancer. However this short little essay is going to be focusing on DDT. Which was banned in 1972 due to its adverse effect on wildlife and humans.

DDT is an “EDC” Aka an Endocrine-disrupting chemical. The endocrine gland releases hormones in the body that regulate mood, growth and development, reproductive systems, and the way our organs and metabolism work. However because Brain as an adolescent was exposed to DDT there is a good chance that it disrupted his endocrine system. NBCI’s article on delayed and early puberty states: “It has been observed that adolescents who have been exposed to the estrogenic insecticide DDT and then adopted internationally display early or precocious pubertal timing.” Which means due to Brain being exposed to DDT at a young age he could have had early puberty and a growth hormone deficiency. “Children with early puberty are at a risk for accelerated skeletal maturation and short adult height” according to pediatrics.aappublications .org. The short adult height is due to bone growth stoping too early in life. Leading to the adolescent never reaching their full height. Having the endocrine gland disrupted could also give him a growth hormone deficiency. This can also create problems with metabolism. Which would explain why he is a bit chubby. This deficiency would also cause short adult stature. Here is a graph showing how early puberty affects adult height when starting over six years old and under. In both treated and untreated cases.

So due to the fact that this would remain untreated Brain’s short stature, that makes him smaller than the average male and female mouse, is most likely due to his early exposure to DDT. Another reason that this is the likeliest answer. Is that in the episode “The visit” Brain’s parents are normal sized mice as shown standing next to Pinky.

This demonstrates that Brain’s short stature is not hereditary and must be from an environmental factor. Which in this case is DDT. Due to the fact it effects his endocrine gland. Leading to early skeletal maturation and a growth hormone deficiency which wouldn’t allow him to grow properly. Hence the shorter than average adult height.

[shozaii]

Hey! I love your writing! It's so cute. 💖 Can you write a HC about s/o and Todoroki, Bakugou, Shinsou and Kirishima first time? (It's the first time for both of them) I'm already excited to read aaa You can add another character if you feel like to.

(a/n): hello! ahhh thank you🥺❤️ i hope you enjoy them!

ps; i’m assuming it’s their first time dating don’t come for mE KSJSJS

requests are still open!💜

masterlist

•••

first time!

warnings: aged up characters! and slight nsfw!

•••

kirishima❤️

can we,,, talk about this,,🥺

eijirou would be the happiest man on earth when he finds out you have feelings for him.

you had no experience of dating, so what do? you wanted to tell your feelings but then you were freaking out

i have this feeling that he thinks nobody could ever fall for him (WHICH IS FALSE) but you proved him wrong🥰

and yes, he has feelings for you too! cue him being alone in his dorm, dancing to the cutest love songs that reminds him of you jsjdj

so it’s late at night, and he called you out to have a little chat with you

you knew the chat was something else AHA

and so there you two were, outside the dorms, in the cold night. when he saw you, he smiled his usual toothy grin and signalled you to come over.

when he confesses, your heart pounded so hard you could hear it

“i’ve been waiting my whole life to say this! i get it if you really don’t want to-you know... but before i lose my chances, might as well get it out,right?”

and before he could finish, you pulled him into a hug, burying your face into his sweater.

you two are the cutest couple alive. mina takes tons of pictures of you two (sometimes sneakily)

kaminari constantly teases you two, sero feels like a proud dad😳

and when you two train, it’s like you two were made for each other. even your quirks make the perfect combo!

he texts you whenever he’s not able to see you

it’s his first time dating someone so he promises to be the best boyfriend to you! he takes you out on dates, buys you your favorite candy, gifts you tons of kisses

he knows you love his hair down so on most dates, you’d see that a lot!

he’s fine with holding hands in public because he feels this manliness in him surging😤❤️

he always gives you little pecks on your cheeks and you do the same. he just didn’t know how he was going to kiss you on the lips?? he wanted it to be special so he waited.

the time came, when you two were in his room, slow dancing with the lights dimmed out. he was nerVoUs and you were too.

that’s when he went in for it.

his kisses are slow and passionate. he doesn’t want to rush because when he’s with you, time is limitless. imagine the whole world revolving around you were just stars in the night sky. fireworks from a distance.it was momentary bliss, to be honest.

he looks you in the eyes and asks, “you okay with this?”

you blushed. “yeah.”

he holds your cheek, leaning in as your lips fit together perfectly. he even smiles in between kisses because he’s just so happy🥺💕💕💕

you two end up in bed and go ‘???how did we get here???’

then you resorted to laying down on the bed. you laid on top of him, leaving a few more pecks on his forehead before settling in.

you can never go wrong with a boy like eijirou🌸

todoroki❄️

most probably the boy to be shook when he found out he had feelings for someone.

especially the someone being you. his intentions could never go wrong. i mean,,,look at you. a masterpiece from heaven itself.

right in front of him, blessing his sour days.

probably started around the time after the sports festival. he couldn’t help but notice your cheerful self in class. how you smile at your classmates. the little gestures that made them happy.

it made him happy too.

and you loved talking to shoto too! he was really quiet at first; but it was you who knew how to break the ice apart(no pun intended)

he told midoriya about it, sweating.

“well, todoroki. i’m sure your feelings wouldn’t lie to you! follow what’s best for you.”

he smiled. he knew his decision that very moment.

love is a new feeling to him- since his childhood days weren’t the best. and when he felt it, his emotions were all over the place.

you too, were astonished. you knew from the beginning of school days, you had fallen for him. so what were you about to do? leave it behind? find a way to let it out?

shoto also prefers to admit it to you personally. so he did it right after school finishes-while everyone was heading back to the dorms.

“y/n. i need to talk to you for a second.”

“sure! what’s up?”

he’s pretty straightforward, so he’d say it immediately.

“i like you. a lot.”

“ah! i like you too! that’s-“

“no. i like like you. um, feelings.”

you paused. well, it was obvious. you two were alone, he was blushing.

oh my god my crush just said he likes me.

paniK

it was mutual!🥰 a few were shocked to find out that you both were in a relationship. some people described you as polar opposites. others already knew that you had a crush on him, wink wonk

shoto has never really gotten physical affection for a long time, so it takes a while for him to settle in. but that doesn’t stop him from being with you almost 24/7

he learnt that he loved being kissed by you on the forehead. it was such a simple yet deep reassurance that you were there for him.

he loved kissing you on the cheek🥺❤️ he finds your cheeks so squishy and adorable. he also loves ruffling your hair during your cuddle sessions.

he loves loves loves it when he hovers over you while you’re on his bed-looking like the angel you are, and he starts leaving the trail of kisses from the cheek, slowly to the lips. it was a feathery peck. he was afraid that you didn’t want it.

but looking into your eyes, it was a plead for more. he closed in the gap between you two. your hands wrapped around his shoulders, and his hands landed on your waist.

momentary bliss part 2

sometimes you two communicate through each other’s eyes. no one else gets it😌

your quirks are a match made in heaven. it surprises aizawa on a whole new level.

he learned beforehand about a few of your favorite things so he decided to get them for you.

would max out endeavor’s card for you

long walks in the park, mall visits-anything you want, he gives.

somehow you always made him feel so special. and he was so glad his first time was a blessing.

bakugou💥

“i don’t have feelings! now quit it!” he says while literally blushing in front of the bakusquad. yeah i definitely see that happening.

blushes so red but wipes it off as if he’s got a fever. damn bakubake🥺

you didn’t know what he meant, feelings for who?

and that was because you had them for katsuki. like, a whole lot.

he may be an angry pomeranian, but he’s your favorite pomeranian😌❤️

everyone is so confused. how did you- a wonderful human being, so delicate and graceful, had fallen for katsuki??? nobody knew, and nobody judged.

because they knew, it was you who was falling in love🥺 so they were supportive.

remember that one dance the bakusquad and uraraka did when they got through the exam? that was exactly what they did when you told them about you liking him

i mean,,, that boy looks at you from afar during class. he chooses to watch your quirk develop during training. he goes quiet when he sees you.

like cue him screaming at both kaminari and sero. then you come in, and he goes all silent. he doesn’t say a word. just this peaceful look on his face

you know, the soft face bakugou makes when he thinks?? that one. only you had that switch

alright, he’s had enough. he’s gonna square up, walk right up to you, and say, “yeah i like you. what about it?”

easy right?

no. he was a trembling meSS. it was his first proposal thingy!! being nervous is normal,duh.

screams into the night, thinking of the words to tell you. he messes up and the whole world (namely the bakusquad) go crazy on him.

he’s gonna do it. and so the next day was a fresh start for him. walked up to you.

god, were you a glimmering beauty.

“what is it? you seemed a little riled up lately. you okay?” you asked, genuinely concerned with his face.

“ilikeyou,” he mumbles. and you go, “huh? sorry katsu, can you please-“

“y/n i have feelings for you! hear me?”

you were just there, like :0

“i don’t do stuff like this. just get it over with if you don’t feel the same.”

“hey, hey! i r-really like you too! i was just finding a way to let you know... but i guess i didn’t have to.”

“ha, well look who won,” baby boy smirks.

dude he’s so happy his heart was doing somersaults

he didn’t mind if your relationship was a secret or not; you were his anyway. but it was for a little while. he made sure you felt comfortable

the little dance comes along again from the four of them

you two love training together! he makes sure you’re doing it right and he allows you to correct him too. only you🤭💕

i’d like to think that he would stop calling you names like dumbass, or idiot. maybe it would turn to baby or babygirl. babe. hottie. sweet names for his s/o

dates with him are wholesome. carnival, a little cafe, movies. he takes you to the beach during sunset if you’re feeling down

then he gets you these gifts you could forever cherish😭

would definitely hold hands with you. tough guy game🥺👉👈

so far, he loves it when you ruffle his hair. heck, he doesn’t care at all when you do it in front of anyone. he just gives this stupid grin which says, “look at my baby.”

flusters when you hug him out of nowhere,though🤪

when nobody’s looking/during school hours, he gives quick pecks. nothing more, nothing less.

kisses with katsuki are rich in passion and devotion. you know what he means with every one he gives you. the first time he kissed you probably happened during a warm cozy night in with him, in your room. he wouldn’t ask. it was just like a surprise.

“babe.”

his heart beated faster than a race car. you replied, “hm? what is it?”

pecks your lips and pretends like it was nothing. you smirked, holding his chin.

“what? i just..tried? don’t look at me like that.”

“but you didn’t say for how long.”

“clever.” he said as you brought his face near yours.

you had to admit, you weren’t so brave. but seeing this boy blush after his usual screamo days boost you up. so you did it. you sealed it off with a kiss. this time, a longer one.

you breathed in his light caramel scent- now lingering on your clothes as he pulled you in his embrace. his fingers slowly intertwined in yours.

momentary bliss part 3 (god i love these so far)

all in all, i would forever believe his s/o is the only one who can see his soft side. katsuki makes sure to treat you well like never before❤️

shinsou💜

very, very nonchalant about his feelings for you

but he had to control the way he almost tried to swoon around you oh my god

you two have conversations as usual, it’s nice talking to him. he opens up to a whole new version of him that you rarely see.

he had no idea you had a crush on him too sksjdkd

this man is so stoic, he technically holds it all in when talking to you. (which of course, is the cutest thing in the whole world)

hitoshi may have actually been worried about the things people have told him. how they might have talked behind his back. avoided him because of his quirk.

but when it came to you, it all changed. you weren’t running away. you didn’t flinch at his sight. most of all, you were just being you.

like shoto, i don’t think anyone would expect him to fall for you or vice versa. hence, when they found out, it would be a surprise🥰

mans gotta plan this whole thing for weeks because you’re too perfect to lose😤

your classmates had to make you talk to him just because you were so shy hhhh

he texted you one day, wanting to meet you. you were freaking out, but still prepped for what was about to be the best day of your life

the sun was slowly setting. you meet him in a park nearby. he was standing next to the lamp post, looking through his phone.

he looked so good in his dark blue flannel, with his white t-shirt and black jeans. his hair was tucked back with a headband.(he was already handsome, so take this😤💜💜)

“sorry, had to call you out like this.”

“no, it’s fine! what’s up?”

deep breaths..! “um, y/n. i find you really-i just... argh what am i doing..? i really like you and-“

he placed a hand on his neck. “i don’t know how to put it to words. but i absolutely want to be with you. for a really long time. it sounds weird, but you mean so much to me”

your vision was blurry. you didn’t realise that you were letting the feels hit so easily

“hitoshi, i get it all.”

“you...do?”

“because i feel the same as you.”

this cute grin (inherited by aizawa) when he heard those words. “come here,” he said, pulling you into a hug.

and so it began, a beautiful relationship.

you two shared so much with each other. it was like watching puzzle pieces fit in perfectly.

he listens to every problem you have and you do the same. it’s always equality in the house. one never goes down or up. it’s always together🥰

10/10 would train with you to develop your quirk. he wants you to join the journey

pda is fine with him, holding hands should do! might as well surprise you with back hugs🤪 and then he lifts you, spins you around until you beg him to stop.

only you can take care of his sleep schedule.

sometimes he comes to school without any sleep and you blow up

“what did i tell you?”

“i had six cups of coffee. no big deal.”

“how-“

he shows you pictures of his cats😭😭💜 he has so many

he is the cat himself so he likes to nuzzle up when you both cuddle. and it’s a must for you to run your fingers through his soft locks😌

when he’s the big spoon, prepare yourself for some wholesome content.

praises you 24/7, tickle fights, boops your nose, little naps

hitoshi enjoys kisses on the neck too! whether it’s height difference or not,,, he reaches for the neck because this boy KNOWS your sensitive spots.🤭

when he goes in for it, he wants it to be a memory.a priceless, flavorful one he leaves with you which is hard to forget.

fun fact: kiss him on the jawline and you’re already making him weAK

but if it’s a subtle one, he would go for the face. any parts of it-cheek, forehead, bottom of your lips.

one fine day he just has you against the wall and you’re just standing there, a blushing mess.

“close your eyes.”

“w-why..?? are you about to steal kisses from me,toshi?”

“maybe, kitten. but you have to tell me if you trust me.”

you closed your eyes, and he cupped your face with his hands. he brought your face up to his, slowly connecting your lips. the last thing he’d want was to scare you

he felt you smile in between the kiss. you didn’t hesitate, didn’t pull away. in fact, you were more than happy by just returning it. his hand travelled down to your thigh, bringing it up to his waist.

his head was dizzy with euphoria. you were such a good kisser, damn. when he let go, both of you were breathless.

“i do trust you,silly.”

yES IT WAS momentary bliss part four babyyyy

hitoshi defines a godly amount of,,,heat. just,,,he’s hot. and cute. perfect.

(a/n): ayee i did it!!! slight nsfw/nsfw work is reallyyy not my thing so i hope this was a fun read!!! jekskd fun fact scenarios are my fav thing to write🥰

[nightswithkookmin]

Was Jk shading Taehyung during his New Years wishes to him at GDA? Twitter people are reading a LOT into it, saying that Jk is still salty at Tae and vice versa. They seem pretty chill to me. Why do people always find reasons to believe there is Vminkook drama?Is there a reason to think they aren't repairing their freindship?

VMINKOOK...

First of all, why would JK shade Taehyung? What are they fighting about, I wonder. Has anyone known JK to be the passive aggressive king slash shade throwing one in that trio? Because, not me...

I don't see him as the, 'those two are hanging out now followed by a slight head tilt,' kind of person. The 'Jimin wants to come but JK is keeping him from coming,' the 'well, you ignore me anyway so I couldn't tell you were on a mission' kind.

Or even the, 'my friendship relationships are gold to me and it's important for me to nurture those connections' knowing damn well the elephant in the room has a possessive streak and he himself has been on record, allegedly, stating he has one same age friend and all his friends are hyungs- so what is JK to you then Jimin?

Then the whole, 'texting is not a great way to build connections and is a barrier to effective communication' -words spewed in full cognizance of the fact JK is a bad texter yet prefers texting to talking on phone anyway- that is what I call shade. Not sure what was in the water that day, but chilee Jimin was all over the place in that Be Behind video. Lmho.

I think everyone, including even the semi-rational Tuktukker, know damn well what JK meant by that statement and what had prompted it- but leave it to them to circumvent.

Ah, V hyung... we used to have a special bond. When we were trainees, we had such great chemistry. V used to be the easiest hyung to talk to, now it's awkward.

Where is the shade in this? I don't think at all that he is or was in anyway shading Tae or any one. To shade would imply he has stock. He don't.

I hate when people talk about Tae Kook as if there is something wrong with their bond. There isn't. It is what it is. It's just not what their shoppers make it out to be. They are looking for depth where there is none. The fact of the matter is Tae Kook lacks depth to their dynamics. We know it, JK knows it, BigHit knows it. No amount of bullying Jimin or Jokers will add that missing depth back to their relationship. Sorry.

'He is still salty,' honey he was never salty about anything to begin with. They tried it! Making it sound like JK wants Tae to change in order to relate with him again. He don't.

Why would JK be salty about Tae's growth? Why would he object to Tae's growth?

Because that's what it is. This whole Tae Kook tensions is not about them fighting, it's about them growing apart. Tae grew the fuck up and JK can't relate with him or treat him the way he used to when they were young.

And if these self absorbed, legally blind shoppers looked beyond Tae Kook for a second, they will know it's not just JK complaining about Tae changing and becoming different as he grew up.

Tae used to be the easiest hyung to talk to and bully because they were closer in age and Tae allowed for such familiarity between them. Similar to how, Jin and Jimin allows for a certain degree of familiarity and informality between them and Jk.

While Tae allowed and was open to this level of closeness and informality between them, JK apparently held on to the gates, only scraping the surface of it and inhibiting the depth that could have been to their dynamics.

Was Tae content with that dynamic? No. Did he communicate that to JK? May be he did but JK wouldn't let his guards down. Tae failed to breach JK's emotional boundaries and years later he would express this sentiment openly to JK in their conversation in Soop.

Whereas, JK admitted to Jimin's successful breach of his emotional walls when he recounted the story of their rainy day fight- let me not hear any one compare Jikook to any of JK's ship in BTS, I whoop your ass. D!

This is the intimacy that is missing in Tae Kook. When you are close to someone, you not only feel at ease with them enough to express your thoughts freely with them, you are comfortable enough with them to be yourself, be different, to antagonize them without the fear that your differences and outbursts will sever your bond or lead to irreparable damage to your bond.

Fact is, in as much as JK felt close to Tae in the early days, he harbored a fear that being fully himself enough to be 'opinionated' and fully honest in his self expressions towards him, would break their bond.

He clearly didn't trust their bond was strong enough to handle all of that. That's the intimacy you find in Jikook. The trust. They are both unapologetically themselves with eachother because they trust in their bond.

Which means they share a lot but are also very opinionated with eachother, clash and assert themselves with eachother. And I know the kumbaya fake woke Jokers hate to hear it, but Jikook are strong not because they don't fight but because their bond withstands the test of a fight as Tae explained in his conversation with JK in Soop.

He was able to get closer with Jimin and Jin by being openly assertive with them- going against Jimin in the dumpling incident and all the times they fought, directly confrontational with Jin over their dance choreo but with JK he had always been scared to open himself in that way with him for whatever reason- I won't bother speculating on. It's their ship, they should do the maths.

May be he learned his lesson. He's learned not to fear conflict, to be assertive without fearing he would be punished for it, to be less passive aggressive as he was before and express himself and his feelings more openly over the years.

But it took him closing himself off to get there. Always looking in photos as if Yeontan ate the last brisket. Exuding melancholic vibes.

Young Jk equally didn't have a positive view on conflict and conflict resolution and I think he knew his place as the youngest and did not want to be as opinionated or assertive against them and so, as he explained to Tae in Soop, he opted to keep a safe distance emotionally from everyone- not just Tae.

When JK talks about we used to have a special bond, all he means is they used to be mischievous, get in trouble together, be brats, chat shit under their breaths behind their hyungs- partners in crime and as I like to call them, be the evil power duo of BTS.

They literally shared one brain cell lol, and conspired a lot. Their bond was unique only in that Tae was a rebel at heart and a bit innocent or immature as RM and the others would say.

Ship wise, Tae used to be on his side. He was protective of him and and looked out for him when they were young- that's of course before he started passive aggressively exposing JK's relationship with Jimin on VLives, incessantly shipping Jimin with Suga, dragging JK's ass away from JM's car so he could ride with him and all of those harmless moments that to anyone with little understanding of Tae's character would assume Tae didn't support JK's relationship.

And even after Soop, he put JK on the spot when he tried eye fucking Jimin through the view finder during their dynamite MV- he knew what JK was going to do. He's seen him do that a countless times to Jimin- HE KNOWS.

There is a reason JK gave him that look in the Dynamite shoot interview when he thought Tae was intentionally trying to expose him holding hands with Jimin behind Suga.

As much as these little things may be irritating to Kook, I don't think Tae gotta kiss his ass too. Jk can be messy sometimes with his Jikook agenda.

Of course they dynamic would change if Tae changed too- which is what Jimin and everyone says of Taehyung. He is very reserved and mature now. He is not the same childish, immature, reckless teen JK or Tuktukkers used to know.

He grew faster than either JK or JM had hoped and they both miss that part of him. Tae said he wished he could get a time machine and show Army the 'Chimchar' he was back in the day. The only way Taekook can be real is if we all hop into a time machine and go back in time to change the trajectory of events.

Tuktukkers need to let go of their old ship, that ship is dead and embrace the new ship brewing in its stead.

Jimin have said occasionally, that side of Tae pops out but he is very different from who he used to be when they were young. Which explains these outbursts of moments and interactions reminiscent of their past bond but that's all that is.

Why do these people insist on infantilizing Tae and holding him to his past?

That comment at GDA wasn't shade. But it was an inside Joke I feel. Like I said, when JK talks about their past history and bond, to me it's reference to a time period where Tae was on his side and was mischievous. To me it's code for 'I miss when you were less uptight and strict.'

He brought up when Tae gave them leeway and was lenient with their schedule during the making of Be- a sentiment all the members expressed in the Be behind video when they praised Tae for giving them much room in their schedules.

It was the same thing he said during his speech to Tae at GDA after bringing up the whole past bond thingy. He wanted to express appreciation to Tae perhaps because the loose schedule Tae had created had given him much time to go home and give his man a blowjob or go house shopping with him- who knows.

The way he kept looking at Jimin while saying that... yea. I'm going with that. Lol.

That loose schedule definitely put Tae in JK and JM's good graces.

My take away from that moment though, is- JK's agenda to give Tuktukkers hernia🤣

Lord I'm dying. I laughed so hard my ribs hurt. Pray for me. Lmho.

Chilee JK.

Dude is on a mission to run the entire Taekook gay, Taekook married propaganda campaign into the ground. What guts me is, he knows what Tae Kook is. I bet he went online after that Tae Kook Vlive to watch Tae Kook compilations. He's been on a mission to obliterate that ship since. Lol.

I mean I won't put it past him. Probably looked up Yoonmin while he was at it and showed Jimin analysis videos of him moaning in Suga's bedroom🤣🤣🤣🤣

Would explain why he was laughing when he saw Yoonmin in the comments during the VLive and why Jimin looked like he wanted to eat us alive. Lmho.

Oh Tae touched my peepee? You bloody moaned in Suga's bedroom how about we call it even?

ROTFL.

I joke but I mean, this is the same dude who took an online personality test after Tae read his results to him in Soop- he definitely watched those Tae Kook compilation-Y'all laugh else I'll shoot you. Lmho. I can't be the only one who finds this funny!

He knows what shipping is, he knows how statements like that would be construed by the fans- and the fact Jimin had spent an entire interview and behind scenes openly disavowing his glorified friendship connections... I smell a renewal of commitment somewhere.

Don't mind me. I play too much sometimes.

There is nothing wrong with Tae Kook's friendship. If anything, it seems JK feels very appreciative of Tae in recent times which is usually a good sign between them because for Vminkook to thrive they all need to make space for eachother and for the pairings amongst them to thrive- Vmin, Taekook and Jikook.

I hope this helps?

Signed,

GOLDY

[slxyangel]

Handcuffs (Duff McKagan x Reader)

Summary: Hii! I was wondering if you could write something about Duff and his girlfriend have been fighting on tour. Everyone is annoyed with the fighting, so Axl handcuffs them so they can’t run away and avoid their problems. Thanks. This was requested by  @julessworldd​ and I finally had time to get round to writing it. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Wordcount: 2.1k.

Warnings: Some swearing and that’s essentially it.

A/N: The name of the fic sucks super super bad, but I swear it’s funny; tell me your thoughts on it :) Also, get ready for a lot of Duff, bc all of my requests rn are about him. I might leap them with some other works I have in mind *wink, wink*.

REQUESTS ARE OPEN

Masterlist: https://slxyangel.tumblr.com/post/189625800403/masterlist

Waves.

The boat is drifting from side to side.

A lot of waves.

Like, a dangerously fucking lot of waves.

What the hell.

Wait, these are not waves.

This is you being carried around in God knows what to God knows where.

And now you are almost violently left (or, more accurately, thrown) in a bed. You open your eyes to see several arms, probably more than two, probably less than six, toying around your recently awakened figure. Seriously, what the fuck?

As you try your best to figure out what is going on, what was going on before you were tossed around under yet to clarify circumstances, and what apparently will still be going on for a while, you identify your captors by their features. Fibrous arms, tan skin, callous hands and a mop of dark curly hair? Pale, tattooed arms, twinky frame and red strands of straight hair? Obviously, it has to be them, it couldn’t be any other people on the planet.

And the milliseconds it takes for you to draw their names in your head are enough time for the skinny diabolic peanut to handcuff your right wrist. Then he backs off, along with his accomplice, just a few steps. Well, not that they have much more space to back off inside a tour bus.

Obviously, it has to be them. It has to be Axl and it has to be Slash. And it has to be the two of them together.

You turn your incandescent eyes from their main objective to the place where your no-longer-free-hand is tied to something else. And that something else turns out to be another hand. Another hand attached to Duff.

- OBVIOUSLY, I’M GONNA FUCKING KILL THE TWO OF YOU.

And this time you say it out loud.

Like, so damn out loud that your boyfriend, now turned into an annoying physical extension of your arm, wakes up from his most definitely no longer peaceful sleep. And when he does, since you are in a tour bus and the place is small and the space is used to the millimeter, he bumps his head against the cupboard strategically placed above him. His blow raises general laughter among his bandmates, who are all around to see the spectacle you two are surely about to give. And when you see Slash waving a tiny metallic key with a mischievous smile, your anger tells you that Mamma didn’t raise no disappointer.

- GIVE ME THAT KEY.

You sit up and stretch your free arm towards the guitarist, but he doesn't give you enough time and immediately puts the key in his mouth, just enough to bite it with his front teeth and show you what he is doing. He can’t hide his smile, or he doesn’t want to. He finally closes his lips around the metallic thingy and it disappears from your view. He hasn’t swallowed it. He hasn’t swallowed it, right??? I mean, he might have, cause it’s Slash. But holy shit tell me he hasn’t.

- This last week with you has been a fucking nightmare -- Axl speaks with voice clear as a day, he is enjoying. Thoughts of the cruelest methods of revenge start pacing your head --, and for “you” I mean you two lovebirds. What are you? Fifteen years old? You can’t be running around yelling at each other, then go with the silent treatment and then come to the rest of us bitching about how the other has pissed your ass so much, this has to end. And since some of these cowards -- now he points at the members of the band who are not handcuffed to your wrist -- were brave enough to complain the same way I am doing right now but not enough to put an end to it, I took matters into my own hands. Well, yours, more exactly. And I’m not gonna take the cuffs off until you talk it out and solve your problems like the adults you clearly aren’t.

- Oh, now that’s surprising -- your answer comes off bitter -- I didn’t know the “adult” way to solve things involved handcuffs.

- Well, you can take them off now because I don’t need this shit to talk to my girlfriend -- Duff finally opens his mouth. He sits up in the bed, right beside you, not that he has many more options. His free hand is covering the spot of his head he just hit with the furniture --. Though now that I mention it, maybe she does.

- Excuse me??? So I am the one running from the problem here??

- See? I told you all she was bitchy.

- YOU TOLD THEM I’M BITCHY?

- Yes he did -- Slash answers your question before Duff has time to, but his words sound weird.Good thing he mustn’t have swallowed the key.

- Slash, we’re trying to solve a problem here -- Steven adds, also looking at the panorama -- so shut the fuck up.

- Sorry mate, she asked.

- Well, sorry to break it up to you  but I’m not the one who’s ignoring her boyfriend here, in fact it’s pretty much the other way around -- your intervention is directed to the general public, since they seem to be so aware of the issue because of someone’s loose tongue. But that someone takes the hint.

- So now I am ignoring you???

- No, now you aren’t ignoring me because you have a fucking handcuff and you can’t run from me like you usually do.

- Oh my god, do I run from you??? -- Duff sounds genuinely shocked. This bastard knows how to play his part in front of the guys, but it won’t wash, not with you.

- No he doesn’t -- Steven adds, always being the advocate for love.

- Yes he does -- that’s Slash, always being the advocate for chaos.

- SLASH!

Now he doesn’t even bother to defend himself, he did it on purpose, he is fucking enjoying. Lowkey, you find that funny, but he obviously hasn’t contributed to the plot for the sake of a solution, but for the sake of drama. I mean, the guy is only missing a bowl of popcorn and the 3D glasses. On the other end of the spectrum there’s Izzy, who hasn’t opened his mouth a single time and looks like and unbothered wine aunt. Like, literally, he has a glass of wine in his hand. And now returning to the point that keeps us here…

- I don’t run from you, babe.

- Ooohhh don’t use the babe card on me right now because we are arguing and I might as well stab you in the eye, Duff.

- Jeeeeeesus, I don’t run from you -- the bassist backs off before your eyes start going up in flames --, I don’t know, I have stuff to do. But you can always talk to me.

- No. I can’t because YOU NEVER HAVE TIME.

- BECAUSE I’M ON TOUR!!!

- OH so since you’re on tour you don’t have time to talk to your girlfriend but you do have time to fuck her??? -- There is a general snort. Well, at least no word from Slash, which is kinda disappointing.

- Holy shit -- Duff has opened his eyes so much it looks like they are gonna jump from his skull and leave the place rolling -- don’t give these fuckers one more thing to pry about because. They. Clearly. Don’t. Need. It. -- He shots deadly glares to each of his bandmates.

- Well, you were the one telling them I am bitchy. For which, by the way, you also have time.

- Jesus Christ how the hell did I think this was a good idea????? -- Axl starts regretting having put handcuffs on both of you, and you don’t blame him.

- Then take off the cuffs -- you suggest, slyly.

- Slash won’t give me the key.

- I wouldn’t have worded it better than that -- the guitarist finally puts the key out of his mouth, but he doesn’t give it away. It must be tiring to try to intervene in someone else’s argument while trying not to choke on metal.

- Then this is what you get for being such a brat -- now Duff is the one calling him out. Good, at least there is one thing you two agree on --. Now, honey, I’m sorry. I never meant to ignore you, but I didn’t notice you were upset about it or anything until this past week. I know things shouldn’t have escalated the way they did,  I guess I was just overwhelmed by everything and I ended up projecting stuff into us two.

- Duff… -- that was so sweet. You actually never thought he would back off so easily, especially since you had been so picky with each other for some time now. -- It’s fair, I’m not mad at you. Actually that’s on me, because I am the one who hasn’t been clear about her feelings lately. I don’t know, I have been feeling a bit off, but I never got round to talk to you about it, because I see you have so much going on around, and so much to do, and so much pressure, but at the same time you are living your dream and you look happy and you deserve to enjoy it. I really didn’t want to be the one to pop the bubble worrying you with my stuff, and I just thought it would eventually vanish. But it didn’t, and I made you pay for something you are not to blame for.

- Babe -- he uses the word with feet of lead this time, just in case your reaction to it resembles the one you had before. But no, now he can definitely use the babe card -- please, I need you to know that you can always talk to me about anything. Always. No matter what. That’s what I’m here for. -- now his handcuffed hand holds yours, and his other hand travels to your cheek. The touch is so tender, so concerned that you can’t help but lean into it and close your eyes for a moment. You hadn’t realized until now how much you had missed that. -- But I need you to tell me, please. I can’t guess what’s going on out of the blue, so please, please, always tell me. I really don’t want us arguing like this again, especially if it has a solution, so let’s communicate from now on. Okay?

You nod against his hand. In the end, it turns out that you only needed to talk, to have a conversation instead of throwing things at each other to see who hits harder. In almost perfect synchronization with each other, you two lean in for a hug. Well, better said, a semi-hug, because let’s not forget that you are handcuffed and basically can’t move your arms. But who cares? You love him so much you feel your heart is gonna burst out at any moment and, now that you finally have him around you, you don’t understand how you were able to live without it for a WHOLE ENTIRE WEEK. Insane.

From your place between Duff’s hair and the scent of his neck, you hear Steven saying “Told ya. Pay me” and Slash responding with a huff, before he slaps what you presume is a banknote in what you presume is the drummer’s hand. So the fuckers have been betting on whether you would or wouldn’t fix things.

- So you fuckers have been betting on whether we would or wouldn’t fix things? -- Duff reads your mind and speaks your words as you two separate from each other. He shakes his head and smiles -- That’s really really ugly, and you really really never disappoint.

- Thanks dude! -- Steven smiles back and Slash doesn’t seem to have anything else to say now that he has a lighter wallet. He even gave the key to Axl -- I just believe in love.

Duff moves his hand up and exposes it along with yours so that Axl can unlock the cuffs. Instead, the vocalist hands him the key and says “You’ve earned it”. Your boyfriend takes the metallic piece and frees your wrist before he frees his. Then, he grabs the handcuffs and the key, he puts them in his back pocket and, winking at you, says:

- If any of you was expecting to have these back, they can go choke on a fork. They are mine, now. For the inconvenience and for the celebration.

[grelrik-da-bozz]

starco, something to think about...

Ok, so it has been almost a whole week and I’ve been celebrating about this ‘final’ they brought to the horrible curse that was cast on Marco and star almost 4 years ago.

It really is good to see that the one most affected by the curse (Marco) is finally free of that... disgusting situation he was in, but since we are talking about Disney, and considering what we have seen during the third season there is a huge possibility that they will spoil everything and come with a “we loved each other before the curse” scenario, even though there were no signs at all (specially from Marco) that there was anything but friendship between them.

Now about this bad transition we have three direct responsables!

The first one being the curse of the bloodmoon itself as it was the direct thing to affect Marco's personality and interfer with his decisions after being cast on both Marco and star, they both acted differently, slightly at first and almost unnoticeable on star but on Marco it was... quite obvious specially in season 3! But there were times in season 2 when you were all like “wtf? why did he do that?” Running with scissors is a good example. Follow me on this ok? Marco decides he doesn’t want to return back home as he has a different life in Hekapoo’s dimension (making star useless as now the one who has his attention in the ‘adventure cool section’ is H-poo) but then star asks him “What about your parents or your friends... or... me?” we see Marco do something quite particular... that in this last episode (Curse of the Bloodmoon) had a special sound and now everything is different! Marco had decided already, he was a 31 years old man, had made up his mind, but the curse forced him to change it. And I honestly hated that part of the episode! How come star decided to casually forget mentioning Jackie She should have said “What about your parents or your friends... or... Jackie... or me?” (some people have argued that star had feelings towards Marco before the bloodmoon but most of them base that presumption on the book*).

Now, the second direct responsable is star, for not accepting Marco's advice when she decided to go see what Tom had prepared for that party, even though Marco had already been right many times before about things related to the outcome of how bad everything could be if she continued using magic, doing what she considered right, following her own ideas, etc. and that only because of the Mary sue powers they ended up a-okay. (Honestly she should have at least said "Marco has already been right sometimes I should listen to him this one time, I mean, he is my friend.”) But no, she didn't, and do you wanna know why she didn’t listen to him? Because star is a strong independent “warrior” princess and that makes it all fine, right? I mean as long as a girl says that she is a strong and independent woman it doesn’t matter how much damage she broughts to anyone, we have to see it as positive. So yeah, sarcasm aside, a huge chunk of responsability falls on her shoulders**.

Finally the third responsable for how badly the curse developed are both “the plot” and Daron & the team that helped her, we all have heard some couple of things about the show, starting from the fact that Daron was already quite sure of how she wanted the show to be, she had more or less worked on it in her head since she was... how old 14? 13? More or less a teen age for sure, and therefore had been munching on that bone every once in a while for the last 15 years! Also is worthy mentioning that she said a couple of times that she had changed things during the course of the years but the idea was there, as solid as it could be and with steps she wanted to follow, now, following her trajectory so far and knowing a couple of her works we know she, for some reason, liked to add some drama in her stories***. And also she seems to be more or less on board the “social/genres/let’s-break-the-stereotypes train” although that could also be Sabrina Cotungo, who, by the way, got promoted to director for Season 3 (promoted might be a bad term as what actually happened is that the other two guys in charge of directing the show in Season 1 & 2 left after they finished), therefore took care of some of the importante decisions for the third season and apparently is the one to blame for it to be so... shity, Now I wonder if she was in charge of the story boards in the episodes where there was social drama issues...  Anyway, returning to the topic of blamming the horrible development of the bloodcurse and the third group of responsables, Daron (as far as we can asume) had this idea of Marco being a really tough subject for star when love was in the middle, I wouldn’t be surprised if she actually had planned for her to fall in love with Marco but that she would also suffer about it cause he had eyes for other girl! The thing is they developed in more than one episode the story for that to happen, they made Marco a really brilliant co-protagonist and many felt quite nice with him finally getting to get the chick he wanted, many out there celebrated it, of course there were also starco-fans who hated it, but the thing is we can’t deny the way they two got together was good! ponyhead helped Marco and Jackie to break the ice, to finally have him telling her she was his crush, accidentally of course but she did, star helped as well, but at the end of the episode we had a strong hint that she liked Marco, that was only a hint, something that star had not really gave her mind too much time to think about, she wrote in her diary something about Marco, how she felt about him and didn’t want him to read it because obviosly she probably wrote that she felt something strange, like butterflies in her stomach when seeing him. She was more or less oblivious to how strong her feelings where and I feel like the real issue here is that star was never meant to end with Marco, I feel that Daron wanted her to suffer a little for Marco and then turn the page, to return back to Mewni and continue her life, sad, angry with herself, but ready to give her heart another chance to find a good guy to love.

*: For those out there who don’t know about it, every cartoon of the last decade (perhaps even a little more than a decade) has done some thing(s) like that before, bringing something special or that expands the lore and that exist only in a type of merchandise that you have to buy in order to read and know. MLP, Adventure time, etc. It’s not something “new” that SVTFOE has and in all of those mentioned cases they had been clear about one thing: the book/magazine/comic IS CANON but it is a SEPARATE CANON, they are not interconnected, even if the author says so. Lauren Faust for example! She had said before some things about specific ponies, ideas she had or things she had planned for some moment in the story... but the show has pointed at other direction. So yeah, we can respect the book but we can’t really take it as 100% interconnected canon. **Ok, I have to point something else about this star issue, yes, she is not the only one responsable, some could argue that Tom is the ‘main responsable’ there, but to anyone other there wanting to say that I’d like to know your answer to this: Did Tom plan involved star and Marco dancing? The answer is a huge NO, yeah he is the one who wanted to dance with star, something bad cause he would have never told her that her sudden change on feeling about him was due to the curse, but it was something he had thought for what he believed was the best, he had never thought about Marco being his friend at the time nor did he planned for them to have their souls linked. And,  as people suggest star was already a little bit in love with Marco before the curse so, that would explain why those feelings were slowly increasing in her heart for the latino boy, but then there is a little something I wanna talk about.  Star managed to finally overcome her crush on Marco and decided she wanted to start dating Tom once again, after she tried to dress him like Marco, overcame her addiction to his musk, etc. She returned his hoodie and closed the portal... they could have ended it right there, Marco could have returned just casually and for some episodes, fighting Meteora and stuff. ***About the drama that Daron had done in some other projects she did before SVTFOE, we have at least a couple which are the most well-known ones. There is this short animated thingy where the girl is captured by some folks, they take her away and her “boyfriend/husband/lover/whatever” takes it on his shoulders to go and rescue her, when he arrives and is all ready to break the ‘bad guy’ it is revealed it actually is a Bad girl, a MILFy looking bad girl who acts all sassy with him and in a matter of seconds they are kissing right there in front of the “princess”. The short clearly points to the idea of “hey girls, never expect a boy to free you from a dangerous situation, free yourself and punch his face because you are strong and independent”… you probably understand my point, is not a bad lesson but I feel some other Disney princesses did it a lot, lot better. So anyway, the idea is clear, the ‘main character’ who casually  looks quite similar to star. The second short I remember is this one  where this girl is cutting with scissors some pieces of cloth that other two girls pass her, to work, she is pretty much daydreaming and ends up being fired, her dreams are all like stuff from the 70s you know, way too colorful and stuff (this short is all drawn in black and white) which is fine, but the design and others… makes it feel odd. (Personal opinion). The third one is probably the most famous one, this young girl leaves her house after her older sister tells her to stay away while she sees the pictures of her ex, which seems to be dating someone else, the young girl (has a lizard as her pet, she talks and hears the pet talk) enters a pub and drinks some beverage she steals and has some kind of alusination and gets scared, fortunately the older sister’s ex recognizes her and acts as if he had been looking for her to help her out of the situation, taking her back home and… that’s it. As you can see two of these three shorts have things in common, a protagonist daydreaming with what seems to be ‘magic in her imagination’ which is what we know star was going to do  (she didn’t have magic, they suggested Daron to make the magic real minutes before she presented the story board for the pilot)  and secondly there is some naughty thing going on as both the blonde princess and the older sister seem to “like” their couple/ex while they are kissing/dating someone else.

[calliecat93]

ST: TNG S5 Watchthrough Episodes 14-17

(Trigger Warning: The episode Ethics contains the theme of suicide. While I will try to not go too in-depth, as it is part of the episode I will be discussing it. If this topic makes you uncomfortable or is triggering to you even in the slightest, please skip the section of the watchthrough. Thank you)

Conundrum: So we have us an amnesia episode. Who’s the poor individual who gets hit with it? Everyone! Yes, some weird scan thingy causes everyone to lose their memories. They still know how to perform their jobs and all that, but otherwise, they remember zilch. I’m kind of mixed on how they did it. Overall, they are intelligent and calm about the situation, which on the one hand feels unrealistic. You’d expect far more panic and tension if you suddenly found yourself on a ship among people you don’t know. On the other hand at this point even without their memories, they’re probably used to weirdness like this (the S4 episode Clues had a similar thing happen) and it’s kind of refreshing to see people handle a situation without becoming paranoid assholes. Also… they make some kind of awkward Troi/Riker/Ro love triangle. Troi has some familiarity with Riker due to their past, which makes sense… but why add Ro to the mix? The only time they really interacted outside this episode was Ro’s intro, where Riker was a hypocritical asshole who made her take her earring off. They really don’t seem to agree and I guess the writers went ‘well they argue… so it must be love’! Which… no, going with this with Ro makes zero sense and it really makes it feel like Riker is playing both women, which both feel OOC for him, and even taking amnesia into account makes him look worst. Why does S5 want me to hate Riker? Otherwise, it was fine. Just kind of eh. Again we kinda sorta did this plot already (differently but still) and it doesn’t become hard to figure out who the one behind this is when you realize that they’re the only one getting prominent screentime who isn’t a pre-established character. Still, it’s just alright, but yeah that love triangle nonsense, while by no means the worst I’ve ever seen, really was unnecessary. 2.5/5.

Power Play: In this one, Troi, Data, and O’Brein get posessed on an Away Mission (Riker almost did as well, but it flew away before it could posess him). They take Ten-Forward hostage which includes Worf and Keiko, and later Picard. This had to be fun for Marina Sirtis, Brent Spiner, and Colm Meaney since they ge to act all evil… though Spiner’s already done it with Lore, but still XD So it was fine. It was tense and had some disturbing moments like Posessed!O’Brein forcing himself on Keiko. Dear God I hope the Enteprise has a counselor (aside from Troi since she was partially involved in this) cause neither of them deserved that. It was also scary to see Data acting like… well, Lore pretty much. Seeing Riker, Crusher, Geordi, and Ro trying to figure out how to save them without anyone getting killed was also interesting, it’s the first time we’ve seen a hostage situation like this in a ST show (Space Seed in TOS kinda counts, but that was an entirely different scenario and was more ‘hostile takeover’ than ‘hostage situation’). That’s honestly all I’ve got/ IDK, S5 has just been painfully average thus far where none of the episodes have been particularly bad, but only like… three so far (Ensign Ro, Disaster, Unification) have kept me interested. Maybe that’ll change here soon bu it’s just like ‘…it’s fine but I feel nothing otherwise’. 3/5.

Ethics: I again point to the trigger warning above. The episode contains the theme of suicide (though it is NOT carried out) so if this topic at all is uncomfortable/triggery, please skip this section. So what happened? An accident has left Worf paralyzed. Crusher has called in a neurologist while Worf, believing that he can no longer be a warrior in his condition, wants to be killed. Needless to say, we’re dealing with some heavy stuff in this one. We kind of have a similar thing going on as in Half a Life where Worf wants to die as according to his Klingon beliefs, his life is over since he is paralyzed. He asks Riker to help commit it as he’s his friend and naturally Riker is appalled at this. Picard breaks it down for Riker and that while we don’t understand it we should respect it… but again we’re talking about assisted suicide. I get what Picard is saying but just… no. The episode makes it clear that we’re supposed to be conflicted, however, and in the end, Worf decides against it due to both an experimental procedure and because Riker uncovered that Alexander would be the one who’d have to assist in the suicide if Worf did it. Needless to say, Worf ain’t letting that happen. It does make Worf’s feelings clear, however. His anger, his fear, it’s very hard to watch Worf in such a state. The neurologist, Dr. Russell, offers him a procedure that may work… but it’s a procedure that is still in the experimental stage and turned down by Starfleet Medical. Needless to say, Crusher’s not exactly happy with the idea of using a medically untested procedure on one of her patients… but to be fair, Worf has refused all other treatment and the use of implants and with suicide the only other option, I can see why Russell would be willing to offer. But at the same time, it does come across her just using this as an excuse to use said treatment which also has plenty of risks on said patients life/further well-being, and Crusher telling her off repeatedly is very satisfying especially at the end when Worf almost died due to her, and she seemed more concerned with noting it than what her actions caused and said that Crusher was jealous. Yeah, Russell sucks. It does bring up a lot of medically ethical questions, however: is it right to use an experimental procedure on a patient when all other options have been turned away or are available? Especially when said patient is suicidal or when it comes to said patient's beliefs? I side with Crusher at the end of the day especially since Worf is very lucky to have survived/recovered his mobility afterward, but the questions are still ones to point out. Then there’s poor Alexander whose on the verge of losing his father and Worf not wanting him to see him like he is and… God yeah. Just as I complain about the lack of impactful episodes, this one comes in. It’s a very tough episode with everything going on with Worf, the theme of medical ethics, and it’s heavy on the emotions. IDK how well I can say that the episode portrays it, but it certainly hit hard and brings up a lot of questions for the viewers. It certainly reaffirms how much I love Crusher XD 4/5.

The Outcast: /sighs/ Okay… how to go about talking about this one? In this episode, we meet a species of aliens that don’t use gender identity, and if they show signs of identifying as male or female, they undergo ‘treatment’. One of these individuals is Soren, who identifies as female and falls in love with Riker. So… there are many things that this can be associated with, but this was made as a gay rights episode. Now… let us remember when this was made. S5 was airing during the early ’90s. This was not a good time for gay individuals. We were very much anti-LGBT+ in those times and the AIDS epidemic where they were scapegoated as a public menace still being rampant didn’t help. In many ways, doing this episode was a bold move and I can respect them for at least is trying to tackle the topic seriously. If there’s any franchise that you’d expect to tackle these kinds of issues it would be this one. But the question is does it hold up 30 years later? Well… unfortunately, no. First, if they really wanted to get the gay rights message across… why was Soren played by a female actress? Maybe it was the only way they would have been allowed to do this, but because of it, it keeps a heterosexual angle that causes the message to be lost. We also don’t have any regular/reccuring characters as queer which would be pretty important to have in this episode. Considering that TOS took the risk with making PoC equal to white people at a time it wasn’t at all welcomed, TNG not doing so with LGBT+ individuals is rather unfortunate to put it nicely. Not to mention it sticking to standard male/female stereotypes as the norm when breaking them down to Soren, as well as Worf’s sexist/bigoted comments. That’s no even going into other identities such as transgender and non-binary. I’d really like to know what they think of this one considering the themes. As I am a bi/demisexual cis woman and this was meant to be a gay rights episode I will look at it as such and from that POV, the episode does not at all look great in a modern light.

Maybe I’m just far too nice and should be harsher on this, and I’m not gonna lie I’m horrible at addressing these things so I apologize if any of this came out wrong. But between this and The Host, it’s clear that the show was ill-equipped to handle LGBT+ topics. But at the same time, back then even considering addressing the topics in any way would have been risky. I do believe that there was a good faith effort and maybe in some ways, it helped when we improved later. It’s always hard to say if people should tackle topics they don’t understand or not. Naturally, it’s rage-inducing when they get it wrong, but it can also open the door to getting people to learn and to improve. Maybe this was needed in the ’90s and they did it the best way that they could, and maybe the fact that we can look at it and go ‘we know better’ is a sign that we’re better than when we were 30 years ago… or again, I am far too nice/too much of a doormat and I give the benefit of the doubt way too much. People who are more knowledgeable/know how to address this far better than I have here have likely done so and I’d encourage others to read more into those perspectives. Regardless, the episode overall is okay I guess. I certainly felt horrible for Soren at the end as she’s taken to undergo ‘treatment’ and Riker trying to help her get out of it. Her speech, wanting to just be treated as a person and not be treated as horrible due to who she is during the trial did really hit me and is why I think that the show did mean well. If she wanted to identify as female and be with Riker, she should be free to and then how she was forced to conform to her society’s views at the end when Riker tried to save her, it’s just... hard to watch. I wish that the ending was more optimistic/hopeful but I can’t say that the message wasn’t loud and clear. It very much reflected society at that time, and in many ways it’s still relevant today concerning how society treats those deemed outside the norm. But it also has issues due to the execution as I already mentioned, and I can only hope that Modern Trek (Discovery, Picard, soon SNW) and whatever they do in the future are/will be better at handling these kinds of themes because there’s no excuse to get it wrong in today’s time. 2.5/5.

I hope that I addressed things properly concerning the last episode. But it’s now done. We have nine more to go for the season. Let's see how it turns out.

[b0blegum]

Always Have Been, Always Will Be (a request)

Author: b0blegum

Pairing: Idol!Wonho x Idol!Reader

Rating: G

Genre: Fluff

Status: Completed

Another requested one shot. This time, i really tried so hard combining the duet thingy with the fluffy scenes. I changed the plot too many times until i finally found this one. I hope you’ll enjoy reading this as much as i enjoy writing this xo

The building you just stepped into was really crowded. A lot of people coming in and out. So many people wearing ID cards and so many teens wandered around in group– probably trainees.

These sights were one you can’t have in your company. Yours was a small one, newly founded, so not many people would want to risk their life to auditioned in such agency. So, how about you?

You didn’t actually really wanted to be an idol, but one day, a man who you often see sitting at the coffee shop next to your school, approached you and asked you for an auditioned. First, you ignored his offer, but then he approached you again after a month and a month later and another month later. He’d always ask why you didn’t show up at the auditions. So to shut him up (well this is kinda rude but you just didn’t feel like auditioning), you finally went into the private audition.

You remembered clearly about that day. It was raining and you didn’t bring an umbrella. All your hair and clothes were soaked in rain and your make up were all washed up. You spent almost an hour at the agency’s bathroom to did retouch and drying your hair with the hand-dryer and that resulting in you coming late into the audition. They told you that they’ve finished and that you should just come to the next audition.

Sighing you looked at your reflection through the glass door and thought that God maybe didn’t want you to be an idol. Until you heard someone at the back, saying your name and approached you.

“Come on, quick. We got 15 minutes to hear you sing.” He said before leading you into the already-emptied practice room.

It was 4MINUTE’s Crazy you were dancing to and yes, you were dancing it like crazy too. Your eyes changed right after the song started and you began to move like a beast until the very end of the song.

The judges, of course wouldn’t be expecting such beautifully crazy performance at an audition, but then there you were, astonishing them with just one song and made them shook their head while giving you a long ovation.

Okay, back to this building you currently at. It was home for a group called Monsta X. The rising boygroup who debuted through the show No.Mercy and why were you here?

“Wow, you’re… early.” You greeted the man in grey hoodie who just stopped whatever he was doing after he saw you coming in.

“You, too.” He smiled. “I came early because there’s a part I want to add to end the song.” He said, walking to the plugged in iPhone and played the song while you were taking off the coat and getting ready to join him.

The man started to spin and moved intensely following the song.

“You really want me to do that?” You asked after he was finished showing you that particular part. “You’re crazy, Wonho.” You shook your head and began to follow what he just did.

Your finger acted as if it was pulling up the length of the dress to reveal more of your thighs while you leaned back to him and swayed your hips to him. His hand would locked in your waist as well as his eyes on yours.

“How’s that?” You pushed away yourself from him. He tilted his head and smacked his lips.

“That’s great, but something’s still off.” He almost whispered. Without waiting for your answer, he began to dance to that part again and again until you suddenly began to join by walking flirtily and grabbed his waist while singing your part in Coming of Age by Park Ji Yoon.

“Arched back.” You ordered when you thought was the proper time for him to do that while you gesturing as if you’re grabbing the hair on the back of his head.

With his body still arched back, your fingertips were tapping his stomach up to his shoulder lightly until you grabbed the collar of his hoodie and pulled you closer to him. “How was that?” You asked while both of you still in that position.

“You’re crazier than me.” He chuckled as he tried to caught his breath.

Both of you were so caught up with the dance that none of you realised that all of Monsta X members were coming in one by one to watch you and Wonho’s little performance.

“Oh, God!” You exclaimed as you saw Minhyuk’s reflection from the mirror.

“Wow, (y/n)! You should feature in our VLive video! You’re so great at dancing.” Minhyuk’s eyes widened.

“You’re that good to the point where I felt like I was pinned on the couch with my eyes glued on your move.” Shownu added. “Jooheon and Changkyun was outside where they watched you through the windows with their mouths wide open.” He laughed.

“Really, (y/n). The world needs to recognize you! You’re really amazing. Really!” Jooheon flooded you with compliment.

You blushed and smiled to them while mouthed thank you.

Finally, the day has come. The TV in your waiting room is showing you the situation of the area where a big stage is set and hundreds of chairs were provided for the stars and honorable guests and also a wide space for the fans to watch their idols performing.

“The crowds are no joke.” You shook your head after taking sip of your favorite blackcurrant drink.

“You’re gonna kill the stage, (y/n). Don’t worry!” The member of your girlgroup trying to put you at ease because in less than ten minutes, you’re about to go backstage and get ready to perform a dance break with Monsta X’s Wonho.

“Yeah, but I hope his fans won’t kill me after that dance.” You crossed your fingers and looked up as if you’re praying to God.

“Come on! How intense that dance could be? Maybe a bit of hug and hips swaying, right?” Another member jammed in.

“But this is Wonho i’m doing with. You know almost everyone sees him like he’s a sex God. Everything he does is ten times hotter, you know.” You fixed the tightly fit dress that hugged your curved perfectly.

“(Y/n)! Stage.” You heard your name is being called and you immediately checked your look and began rushing outside after telling your members to wish you good lucks.

You heard shouts from behind the stage, mostly girls shouting Wonho’s name– obviously. The lights were dimmed and you could see from the gap of the curtain, 80% of the crowds are holding Monsta X’s lightstick.

“You’re ready?” A voice shocked you from behind. It was of course, the sex God himself.

“Yeah. I think I am.” You cleared your throat and stood up straight.

“Okay, great.” He tapped the top of your head and you were of course a bit taken aback by his sudden unnecessary action. “I hope i won’t ruin the stage.”

“Nope. Nope, we won’t.” You replied, trying to calm yourself down.

“Yeah. How come a girl as good as you will ruin the stage? That won’t happen.” He smiled.

When the lights were completely shut, you and Wonho got on the stage, standing on where both of you should be. You at one side of the stage, while he was at the other.

It was when the breathing sound was heard that both you and Wonho was shoot with the spotlight and the crowds immediately lose their minds.

You began singing because the first verse was your part. Wonho and you were walking towards each other with an intense gaze shot onto each other’s eyes. His brushed back hair made him look thousand times hotter and the suits he wore, damn, that made you almost forgot your lines.

When it’s the part where you should be walking in circle with your arm on his waist and his arm on your waist, he looked and smirked at you.

“You’re so beautiful in that dress.” He mouthed. You almost choked and stopped singing, but thankfully you made it to not ruin the song.

The performance continue and now was the time where you’re going to ‘grab’ his hair to make him arched back before pulling him really closed to you.

Wonho loosened his necktie before you grabbed his hair and when he’s arched back, he purposely took off his suit jacket.

You looked at him, surprised, because all of these weren’t on the script.

You pulled his loosened necktie and Wonho helped you by pushing himself really– really close that his nose would touch yours.

The light slowly dimmed along with loud shouting and applause. Wonho covered your face and his with the suit jacket and slowly brought his lips closer to yours.

He’d kiss it gently and softly for seconds before he broke that kiss and gave a small peck on your cheek.

“Great job, (y/n).” You didn’t see it, but Wonho was smiling when he said that.

You stepped off the stage with confused mind. You and him was never done such things at rehearsals and that he always looked like he didn’t have any interest in you, at all.

So, why now?

“Wonho,” you called his name as you both walked to the waiting room. “What was that for?” You carefully asked.

“What do you mean?” He casually replied, unbuttoned the first two buttons of his shirt.

“That… the thing you did on the stage.”

“On the stage? I was dancing. I thought you knew because you were, too.” He acted innocent.

“Not, that! You know exactly what I meant.” You sighed. By now, you could feel your cheeks turned crimson red.

“We sang, we danced, we…” He stopped and smiled at you. “Yeah, I remembered!” He grabbed your hand.

The corridor you both were at now was full of staffs and idols that were waiting for their time to perform, but Wonho seemed like he didn’t care, while you already tried to let go of his hand subtly.

“We kissed.” He smiled.

“I can’t believe you said that aloud.” You whispered, realising some of the idols turned at you and Wonho when he said the word.

With red cheeks, you pulled him into your waiting room, which now was empty because both members and the staffs were already behind the stage.

“Yes. Th– that. The kiss.” You stuttered. “What was that for?”

Wonho smiled and looked at you. Slowly his hand moved to put the loose strands of your hair behind your ear.

“I like you.” He confessed.

You blinked rapidly by his sudden confession.

“I’ve always liked you.” He continued. “Ever since I saw you at your first music show.” Wonho sat himself on the couch. “I saw you performed from behind the stage and  asked the staff who was the girl on the stage, the one who wore light blue sweats with suspenders.”

“That was long time ago.” You said in a really low voice. It was when you just debuted with your group and for the record, you didn’t even remember the outfit you wore at that day.

“I really wanted to get to know you. To get closer to you, but knowing that you’re a rookie group, I told myself that I should better wait.”

“Wait?”

“Yeah. Rumors often attack rookie groups and I don’t want that happened to you and your group so…” he smiled. “Thank God I finally got this opportunity.”

“But that was… four years ago?” You chuckled. “Don’t lie to me. No one would hold on for so long just for someone. You’re silly.”

“You might not believed that and it’s up to you, but I am serious. I am seriously in love with you, (y/n).”

[oblivion-time]

OT’s writing in 2017

I saw people having this thing as an ask me these questions and I’ll answer them thingy, so I decided to answer almost all of them and make it into a post! Sort of a 2017 rewind of my writing in this year. I suck at leaving short answers, but hey, my rambling can be enjoyable at some point! ^-^

Favourite fic you wrote this year

I gotta say Love Me Again, Husband just because I had so many ideas and thoughts about how I wanted this fic to turn out. It’s always so much more fun when you know what you want to do with it and writing on it was never boring just because there were no fighting scene. That’s why it because the length it did. Too many ideas, stubborn me refused to not include them and too much fun working on it.

Least favourite fic you wrote this year

The Wolf who Huffed and Puffed. Definitely. I had a vague idea what I wanted, but I just think the more I wrote on it, the more the plot fell apart and it became what it is. I finished it around in... Marsh/April, but it was just so shitty I so didn’t want to post it, but some people seemed to enjoy it so, I posted it for them. (And I would post the last chapters of it this year just to be done with it, but I don’t want to post it during Resbang season. I want to respect those who have the posting date)

Favourite line/scene you wrote this year

ALDENTE NOODLE LEGS!!! Technically I came up with it during resbang season 2016, but I used it in my Corpse Party AU and I’m just in love with the line! Every time I get to describe weak legs, I use aldente noodle legs.

Total number of words you wrote this year

This was so not my writing year. The spring season and summer season was completely dry for me. I barely wrote anything because of a lot of personal problems that kept me busy. But my total is 235′316. My resbang totally lifted the number and a lot of it is stories I haven’t published yet and some ongoing projects I haven’t quite yet finished.

Most popular fic this year

I don’t bring in numbers on my work, that’s one thing for sure. The fic I publish during resbang season will always bring in the most readers. Aside from my resbang this year, Death Child surprisingly did quite well on both AO3 and ff.net. I thought I sort of cheated on the climax and it was a mediocre fic, but people seemed to really like it

Least popular fic this year

I would say Ripple Effect. When I wrote it I knew people wouldn’t like it consider the whole fic is just Soul wasting away and dying and all the angst, but I had the idea and I felt like working on it, so I did.

Longest completed fic you wrote this year

Love Me Again, Husband

Shortest completed fic you wrote this year

That is published, it’s Ripple Effect

Longest wip of the year

It’s got to be my Corpse Party AU. I’ve written around 33k of it so far and it’s nowhere near finished.

Shortest wip of the year

It’s a story I’m working on now. I’m not going to spoil much, but I can say the story revolves around a complicated timeline. It will be a short one-shot, but it is just a practice run to get me back into the game of Corpse Party. Mark my words, my Corpse Party AU will be finished in 2018!!

Fandom you enjoyed writing for the most this year

Soul Eater. Duh.

Favourite character to write about this year

Soul. Definitely. He was so much fun writing in Love Me Again, Husband because Maka is so secure and strong and even if losing your identity in the way he did, she would be more determined and sure than Soul would me. We know Soul has a past and he has some problems revolving around his identity, he was the perfect candidate for a brain trauma like that and highlight the complexity and difficult of regaining a lost identity. With the whole fic I wanted to shine light on the difficulty to regain a lost identity because I think the movie (The Vow) romanticized that part quite a bit and toned down the harshness on the person’s mental health. I really wanted to show people that and Soul was too perfect for the job. But in other cases, I just love writing about Soul since he has such an interesting life since he’s so human with his flaws that makes him human.

A fic you didn’t expect to write

Milkshake. It’s just such a dumb idea I had that I knew I should just skip on writing, but I just enjoyed the thought of their first meeting and how they shared milkshakes I just couldn’t help myself.

Something you learned this year

When I write, I write pretty fast. When I’m meant to write “from”, it often turns to “form” instead. It’s like 99% of the cases it turns like that and I know when I read through the fic, I need to pay extra attention to those words.

fic(s) you completed this year

The Wolf who Huffed and Puffed (I finished it this year, I just haven’t posted it all)

Love Me Again, Husband

Death Child

Ripple Effect

Cardcaptor Sakura AU

Milkshake

Fics you’ll continue next year

My Corpse Party AU. It was meant to be finished this summer before Resbang, but some personal business prevented me from doing so. My timeline complexity fic will also be finished next year if I don’t complete it tonight or tomorrow, which is unlikely.

Current number of wips

Two. Corpse Party AU and the timeline complexity fic

Any new fics to start next year

I have a fic I wanted to write for resbang two years ago instead of Chase of Tales so that one I definitely want to write this year! I also will post the one-shots for my Circus and Reality fic and wrap it up. I would also love to rewrite some of my older stories since a few of them are really good ideas, just the execution of it was terrible so I would love to do that and show to myself how much I have matured as a person and in my writing compared to then.

Number of comments you haven’t read

I read all the comments! I haven’t missed a single one!

Most memorable comment/review

It has to be the comment on my Chase of Tales fic. I am highly offended by the tiny amount of kudos given to this fic! I only became even more frustrated each time I read a chapter, pressed "kudos" and saw the same infuriating few words pop up time and time again: "You have already left kudos here"

It’s comments like these that reminds me not always numbers and comments reflect on how well the writing and plot is. I know A LOT of people who get stuck on how many comments they get, how well the comments are written or how many kudos it gets to the point  it almost crosses the line of “I worked hard on this so I’m entitled to a lot of recognition and praise.” Numbers doesn’t mean shit. It’s your own feelings about the work that counts. Does it boost my ego when I get comments of people who like what I made, yes it does, but do I write to just get comments and praise? Absolutely not. Then I wouldn’t have kept on writing.

Events you participated in this year

Resbang and SoMa Week 2017 are the only two events I can remember attending.

Fics you wanted to write but didn’t

It’s an angsty fic. The idea was Maka and Soul loved each other in university, but they had to break up because they were going in different directions and moved to different places. They would run into each other during different times in their life, and it would always be something to prevent them from being together, but in the end when they are old in an elderly home, they would coincidentally be placed in the same home and there they could finally be together. If anybody feels up to writing it, feel free to use the idea! If someone decides to write it, please tag me, I would love to read it!!!

Favourite fic you read this year

This is the year when I didn’t read a lot of newer fan fics and I’m going to be a little narcissistic, but I really loved rereading my story The Face of the Beast. The idea is so good and I really enjoyed how it turned out even if there are some parts I would’ve changed.

No but for real, two fics that I always enjoy going back to and rereading are Moving on and Letting Go by Fantasy Fan Girl and Repairing a Broken Soul by Narusaku1357. When I started reading fics, those two I read early on and I simply enjoy going back to them and reading them since I genuinely enjoy them. Not to forget Repairing a Broken Soul is legit and totally a classic. It’s a fic everybody should read.

A fic you read this year you would recommend everyone read

Check the answer above! You will not regret reading those two fics.

Number of favourites/bookmarks you made this year

Oh geez. I’m really bad at leaving favourites and kudos. I read all my fics on my app on my phone and... well... I just add them to my library. I’m shitty when it comes leaving kudos, favourites and comments.

Favourite fanfic author of the year

My favourite will always be Tatsu-Ah-Rei. No competition. No one can ever touch the originality combined with the Soul Eater universe in such a way they do. I so love Eat My Soul (it’s a great one! READ IT! But I warn you, it isn’t completed and it ends just at the most exciting scene and at the climax). There will never be a fanfic writer as good as they are in my eyes.

[lifes-a-dick]

The Pilot (a wholock meta)

[I wrote these thoughts after watching Doctor Who ‘The Pilot’ last week and meant to post this. This is really just for myself so sorry in advance if I don’t make tons of sense here. I would say I’’m gonna write something about each ep but I usually don’t stick to what I say I’m gonna do haha so anything could happen]

Oh jeez where do even I start? The Pilot (!). Called as much supposedly because this DW episode can be watched by people new to the show. But me thinks that’s not all there is to it. There’s the flight of the dead and Girl on the Plane from TFP, the “Landing” as johnlock going canon ...and there’s also a Sherlock Pilot. Planes are ships. Pilots are the ones in control of that ship. It crashes, or it lands safely. There’s no planes in this DW episode (there are spaceships tho). But there’s a ‘ship’.

So Bill and Heather are John and Sherlock, obviously yes? But the mirroring works so both Bill and Heather are constantly both John and Sherlock for different sort of threads of the subtext. Heather even has a black coat and scarf in the pic above but then shortish blond hair like John. 

Like @jenna221b said the “defect” in the eye that Heather wants to “fix” is sentiment (nice one), while Bill thinks it’s beautiful (“it looks like a star”). Sherlock thinks this is his weakness that needs to be fixed. But John sees that in him and loves him for it. 

But were you not also reminded of Ben C’s eyes and his heterochromia?? I was. Her eyes were blue and green and gold. It would reinforce the Sherlock mirror. I wouldn’t put it past them because I’ve seen other character mirrors in other DW episodes given the names and traits of ben, martin and amanda because Moffat uses johnlock mirrors in SO many episodes that he must run out of ways to code them.

Heather was coded as suicidal - she in fact DID take her own life. I didn’t see this the first time. DUH! “Everywhere I go I just want to leave”. Then the puddle gets her and she does “leave”, because the puddle gives you what you want. 

I have a feeling that the episode name is a sherlock clue on an extra level. What if it’s also about the Gay Pilot?? I think we’re seeing John and Sherlock where they were at the beginning of their journeys 

(what if this doctor who season somehow takes us through a johnlock romance arc somehow with different mirrors every time?? Might not happen but would be neat. Bonus for any clues about what the heck sherlock s4 was). 

Sherlock in ASiP wants to “leave” like Heather does in this “Pilot”, taking the cabbie’s pill gambling his life on a 50/50 chance. And John with his gun in his drawer, contemplating it for a moment at the beginning of ASiP. By TLD Sherlock’s gotten to the point where he realises, possibly even surprising himself, that he doesn’t want to die. That’s the end of his character arc though. But here we see Heather willingly let the puddle invite her in, just as Sherlock brings the pill up to his mouth in ASiP.

Maybe this is the significance of the chips. In TLD Sherlock gets chips for Faith because she’s suicidal, and Bill “Serves chips”. She keeps people from taking their lives. Sort of foreshadowing John’s arc, and how John saves Sherlock from that by giving him a reason to live (thats what boyfriends do, they feed you up).

We also have the “can I show you something?” “God, yes!” between Heather and Bill. Another pilot reference.

Heather’s last thought was of Bill, so once this evil alien puddle thingy had taken her, she pursued Bill to the farthest reaches of the universe (please stop me thinking of that johnlock fanvid and the song lyric “anywhere I would have followed you”).

And what the hell happens next is confusing but there’s a little metaphor in there and maybe a HLV and a TRF reference too (the Fall and Fall 2.0).

Bill: Oh my god, I understand. Doctor: You what? Bill: The last thing she said to me. She promised she wouldn’t leave without me.

In T6t we hear all this business about Sherlock’s vow. That it was apparently to protect Mary. It’s a TRICK! Word play. And Sherlock never actually said that before T6T began. T6T was Mary as storyteller, twisting Sherlock’s words to fit her own evil narrative. What he did say that I talked about here , was that he would always “be there”. Just that, that’s it. He promised he wouldn’t leave. 

(this gets cooler if you think about EMP starting when Mary shot Sherlock because Sherlock’s vow he made at the wedding was ONE OF THE LAST things he ever said to John before the day of CAM tower) Bill about Heather: “The last thing she said to me. She promised she wouldn’t leave”

The Doctor tells Bill that she needs to release Heather from her promise, to let her go. So she does. They sort of...break up? 

You have to let me go. You have to let me go. I will. I will. I really liked you. I really liked you.

In TRF Sherlock sort of breaks up with John before he jumps from the roof by telling John he was a fake. To maybe somehow attempt to release John from what was between them. But of course it didn’t work very well. And then there’s this parallel too...

Then Bill and Heather grab onto each other.

Doctor: Don't, don't! Bill, let go! Bill, listen to me. Whatever she's showing you, whatever she's letting you see. It's a lure, it's a trap. She's making you part of her, and you can never come back.

So what the hell happens here exactly? I have one idea that’s a bit trippy.

This brief kind of random scene is full metaphor for queerness, and the two opposing ways it is viewed: from the outside in, and from the inside out.

It’s also about John’s fear and internalized homophobia.

From the outside, those who fear it and are against it see it as something dangerous and terrifying, something that spreads and infects and marks you forever. 

From the inside queerness is beautiful, good, and human.

Bill hesitates then grabs a hold of Heather, subconsciously drawn to this “danger” in front of her. We think she’s in danger because in that moment we the audience are seeing queerness from the outside in. But Bill isn’t in danger at all as we find out a moment later. Heather transports her to another world and Bill is sort of filled with a feeling of ecstasy. She doesn’t look scared, she looks happy.

Bill: I see what you see. It’s beautiful. 

But on the outside the Doctor is terrified and thinks she’s in danger.  Doctor: Whatever she's showing you, whatever she's letting you see. It's a lure, it's a trap. She's making you part of her, and you can never come back.

Bill mirrors John here, wanting to enter this world with Sherlock but feeling afraid, with the voice of his internalized homophobia telling him he’s being lured and trapped. That’s why Bill lets go, because she’s afraid. It’s suddenly Sherlock and John reaching for each other again, but that distance between them coming into focus and ripping their hands apart.

Bill: I saw it all for a moment ... everything out there. She was going to let me fly with her. She was inviting me. - But I was too scared.

Check out Moffat’s specific and meaningful word choice bolded above. Out there (out of the closet). Fly (because falling’s just like flying). And a reminder that John’s afraid. 

So often with villains or monsters in DW, they simultaneously mirror something beautiful and something threatening. It’s the danger of those things that we long for but which could also hurt us. It’s a truth that will either kill you in trying to uncover it, or will set you free.

(there’s loads more i know. @jenna221b covered a lot of it. i just wanted to add these few details. thanks for reading. Here’s a Bill x Heather fanvid I found)

[angelicaphelion-archive]

Soulmate Tattoo AU

I wrote a soulmate au thingy abt my ocs so it’ll have the first paragraph and the rest will be under the cut

AU: The first sentence you hear from your soulmate is tattooed on your wrist.

CHAPTER 1 - The System

Getting the tattoo was completely optional. Some got it, some didn’t. Before getting it, the system would pass tests and scans to really know if it was your choice or if it was a relative or a friend who forced you to get one. Those who wanted it got it. They seemed pretty content with it and hoped to find their soulmate soon and near. Others who didn’t want it we’re also content with that decision. They we’re very capable of living without knowing what their soulmate would first say to them, or even without a care about who that soulmate was. Needless to say, aromantics and asexuals were very content about it being a choice.

For some, though, it was more tragic than that. Some who wanted it got nothing in return. A blank wrist where there should have been words. That usually meant that they would never meet their soulmate, either because they would die before meeting them, or because their soulmate would die before meeting them. Most people that had this result went into mourning and some even committed suicide. For others, sometimes, the words tattooed on their wrist were tragic: “You’re not going to make it” or “See you in the afterlife.” After those words appear on your body, you’d rather be already dead.

Nobody knew how the system worked, except of course those who built it. It was never wrong though. Magic or very advanced science of probabilities, it was hard to tell.

Asking to see someone else’s tattoo was quite common. It wouldn’t usually pass as rude; it was more like a subject of conversations for those meeting each other for the first time. It would also make things quicker. Sometimes, people we’re lucky, sometimes not. Sometimes, it would lead to an unfortunate and rare mistake.

Some planets banned this system because it created chaos and confusion throughout the cities and towns. Like I said, it’s a choice, but some people took it too seriously. Those planets we’re fine without this system after a few rotations around their star.

Me? It was a teenage mistake. Fooling around, wanting to know if that crush was the one. It wasn’t. It never was. All I got were those stupid words: “Bet you didn’t see that coming.” Also, note for whoever is reading this, don’t ask to see someone else’s tattoo while on a date. It usually never ends well.

I’m the only one on my crew that has one. I mean, we’re three, but still. Faheema decided against it and Aethull’s planet was never introduced to this system, and honestly, he couldn’t care less about finding a soulmate, or anyone to date, really. I can respect that. Some days, I completely regret getting that tattoo. If only I had known what I would do as a job. I would be way better off without knowing.

But it’s too late.

 CHAPTER 2 - The Attack

“So, do you ever wonder who has the other half of your tattoo?” said Faheema, breaking my moment of thinking about it. He usually never brings up the subject, which raises up the question: What if he can read my mind? This would be highly unlikely.

“-Nope, I say casually. And I don’t want to talk about it.

-Right, teenage mistake, sorry.” apologized Faheema.

He then went back to staring at the space before us, being the co-pilot he is. It was a good thing he spoke, though, because I really needed to be brought back from my thoughts. I stretch and say: “Take the commands; I’ll go for a quick walk.” He nods and takes my seat as I go outside the cockpit. I walk around aimlessly a bit and find Aethull in the kitchen, experimenting with food from my home world. He basically takes whatever he can find and tries to make them taste good together. Sometimes it works; sometimes it’s a complete disaster. I’m sure he’ll become a great cook for this spaceship someday.

After talking with him a bit, I go back to the cockpit and take back the commands. Then I notice something odd.

“-Have you been monitoring the radar? I ask, as I spot something following us on the screen of the device.

-No, why- oh. Faheema says, looking over. Um... It’s probably nothing?

-Let’s hope so.”

We continue our route but the thing following us still appears on the radar. Sometimes it stays back, sometimes it gets closer. It’s clearly not attacking, but not abandoning us that easily.

After a while, it gets really close. Then the attack begins. A first impact hits our ship and Aethull comes rushing in the cockpit.

“-WE’RE BEING ATTACKED, alarmingly screams Aethull.

-THANKS, CAPTAIN OBVIOUS.” I answer as I try to navigate away from this ship.

A second impact, this time more damaging than the last. Alarms start going off, but nothing life-threatening... except our fuel and electricity levels going down. They hit the tanks. They easily catch up and I know. I realize. They’re pirates. They’re going to board our ship. Something hits our ship, but doesn’t damage it.

That’s our signal

“Find a weapon to fight back. We got pirates attached to the ship.”

Both Aethull and Faheema nod and storm off to find something. Sure, this ship isn’t for attack or boarding, but it can’t be empty of weapons, right? Meanwhile, I go to my quarters and find the laser gun I first brought. I can hear more alarms everywhere, and lights go on and off. I creep silently around, waiting to find and attack those pirates.

Then I feel something hit my head and I fall to the ground, unconscious.

 CHAPTER 3 - The Alternate View

Knim rounds them up.

“-Is this it? I ask.

-Uh... yep, they answer, unsure if it’s a bad thing or not.

-Only three of them? I ask again

-Yeah.

-Shit, this’ll be easier than I thought.”

While waiting for them to wake up, I look around this ship. Classy, but not extremely modern. It could sell well. I also look at the crew members. There seems to be an android and a human, but the other? Probably an hybrid of some sort. Only the human has a wrist tattoo but don’t really care about looking at it. I also have one, and it seems sarcastic as fuck: “Oh, no, totally not...”

“-Actually, Knim, how hard did you hit them? It’s taking long.

-Um... w-well, they start, nervously.

-I’m just joking, I could wait for an eternity, for all I fucking care. I just want to ask them a few questions, or just intimidate them. Who the fuck cares.”

After a few hours, they started to finally wake up. The last one to awaken was the human.

“-Bet you didn’t see that coming, I say.

-Oh, no, totally not... we didn’t see you follow us for hours...” says the human sarcastically.

Then it hits me like a fucking train. I quickly look at the human’s tattoo.

“Hmph.”

I look at Knim, signaling I want to talk to them privately. Once we’re out of this room, I start talking like crazy.

“-Holy shit Knim we have matching tattoos I mean their phrase is quite common but combined with mine? Holy fuck Knim we just captured them, they can’t be my soulmate, that’s fucked up.

-Wait... are you sure? Enquires Knim.

-Well the phrase written on their wrist clearly was the first one I said to them, and the phrase on mine clearly was the first one they said to me!

-Hm... It’s possible! I mean- uh... unless it’s not what you want to hear? Then it’s imp-

-Holy fuck Knim, have you seen them? A fucking hot mess, that’s what they are.

-If... you say so?

-Fuck yes, I say so. Um. Ok, I need to calm down, I say, taking a deep breath. I still need to ask them questions.”

We both go into the previous room and I know. I know the robot heard something. I can see it in their sensors. I doubt they told anyone, though, because the two others look partially defiant, partially scared. I sit on a chair and try to focus on something else than their smug look.

“-So. What is this ship for? I ask calmly.

-For none of your business, says the human.

-Please, try to cooperate. It’ll be way easier this way.

-It’s for research and alien knowledge development,” says the robot, looking straight at me.

The human sends them a sharp look, and the robot only stares back smugly.

“-Ah. Thank you very much for your collaboration. See, I thought about something, I start. We’re at war with the Aegis Council and-

-We won’t collaborate with you pirates, says the human, sharply and direct.

-Let me finish first, I continue. We’re at war with the Aegis Council and we only need a bit of information about some alien species. Nothing serious, we’ll contact you when needed. Also, you won’t get attacked by pirate ships anymore, throughout the whole galaxy. Is that a deal?

-No- starts the human.

-Yeah, deal, cuts off the robot.

-What the fuck, Faheema?

-Well, it’s a good deal. I don’t see why you’d oppose to that. We get immunity from pirates simply from doing the job we’re supposed to do.

-Yeah, Alex, starts the hybrid. It’s not bad, it’s actually very good. If the only reason you don’t want to do it is because you’re intimidated, that’s fine, but we still gotta do it.

-I’M NOT- Urgh, fine. Let’s do it, says the human (who’s apparently called Alex)

-Good! I say. Since we’ll be working together, my name’s Kai. Kai Morgan. My second-in-command is Knimsoeo Toxxarc, but call them Knim.”

I look at Knim for them to undo the bonds of our former prisoners while the others introduce themselves.

“-I’m Faheema, says the robot.

-And I’m Aethull, adds the hybrid.

-...And I’m Alex, captain of this ship. He’s my co-pilot, he says, pointing at Faheema, then pointing at Aethull, he adds, and he used to be our prisoner. So do we just-

-Did you find your soulmate? I mumble.

-I’m sorry, what? asks Alex.

-What? Oh yes. I’d need your number- I mean- The number for the station you use so we can contact you.”

While they’re giving me the information, I look at Faheema. I know he knows and he knows I know. I approach him.

“-Faheema, could we talk in private for a moment, I try to say as menacingly as possible.

-Why can’t we do it here? he asks, smiling like a child.

-No, I say sharply. Come on.”

We go in the next room.

“-Promise me you won’t tell him, I almost plead.

-Tell him what? says Faheema, still trying to look clueless.

-Come on, I know you know. Luckily, he still hasn’t picked on the clue yet and it’s a damn miracle. I don’t want him to find out just yet.

-Hm... alright.

-Promise.

-I promise

-Thanks,” I finally say.

We go back in and me and Knim finally go back in our ship and leave theirs.

 CHAPTER 4 - The Clue

“Hey, Alex, don’t feel too down, it was a good deal.”

Alex stares at me and then looks back at the glass.

“-Hey, I know you don’t want to talk about them but uh... I noticed the pirate captain had a tattoo, I say.

-So? he asks. Lots of people get a tattoo.

-I know... I just thought it was interesting. I didn’t think pirates would even get one.

-Maybe he got it as a teen, or before he became a pirate, for all I care.

-I also noticed he tried to ask for your number?

-He clearly meant the ship station number.

-Are you sure?

-Faheema, what do you want to get at?

-Nothing! I’m just pointing stuff out. I’m not telling you anything important, just details I can’t help but notice.

-Hey, what did he talk about when you were alone?

-Oh, you know business stuff. Just... business.

-Alright.”

That’s it? He still won’t get the fucking clue? Does he pretend not to know only to piss me off or is he really that clueless about love? I’m a robot, not supposed to feel any emotion, for the gods’ sake! I thought humans we’re full of emotions and all, but apparently I’m less clueless than the one sitting next to me.

Then, suddenly, he looks down at his wrist. He looked and knows this line, but he still looks at it.

“FUCK.”

Finally. He realized. I knew he couldn’t be that clueless.

“-Sorry, but what the fuck did you say his tattoo was?

-I didn’t mention it, I say slowly, but it was ‘Oh, no, totally not-’

-HOLY FUCK FAHEEMA WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME DIRECTLY GODS HOW COULD I BE SO BLIND!”

Aethull storms in, clearly disturbed.

“-I heard... screaming? What’s happening?

-He realized Kai was his ‘soulmate’, I whisper in his ear.

-Holy shit. Really?”

I nod and look back at Alex. He’s clearly having a mental breakdown.

“-It’s not that bad, you know?

-What the fuck do you mean.

-Well they could be really ugly or be really shitty, but instead you got this kinda-awkward pirate dude.

-Yeah, adds Aethull. I mean, he’s kinda hot, I can’t deny that.”

Alex glares at the both of us.

Hey, at least he got the clue.