#also I could probably clean this up but I need to go!

[angelfic]

dick grayson x reader

warnings — dark-ish manipulative themes, violence, dick is practically partaking in self harm on the streets. a/n; dick grayson is a little manipulative like we have to face facts here in the same way he’s a fuckboy. this is accurate dick characterisation on steroids kinda… argue with the wall

manipulative!DICK GRAYSON who purposely gets hurt so you feel bad for him and suddenly forget what you were mad at him about.

dick hates it when you two argue, especially because it’s mostly only over the small stupid things. it doesn’t happen that often, but it always affects his performance during patrol.

the only thing on his mind when he’s punching the living daylights out of some criminal on the street is what could you possibly be thinking about right now? are you still mad at him? you’re probably pissed. in his head, you’re throwing darts at a picture of him pinned up on the door and it’s stressing him the fuck out.

not only does this make him a little extra violent, but he also can’t help letting these thugs sneak in a terribly aimed punch or two which, under normal circumstances, they’d never be able to land.

it’s like the part of his brain that concerns you is working a little faster than the rational part, because immediately he’s thinking about how you’re going to patch up the cut on his cheek with your cute little pink band-aids and he’s not going to complain about it once.

he looks a little deranged in a fight because suddenly he’s grinning as he’s beating the shit out of this goon who is now more terrified of him than he was before. because this isn’t just nightwing, the vigilante. it’s an adrenaline junkie whose breath hitches a little when he gets hit, but he’s not winded in the slightest. it’s almost like he enjoys it.

when it gets like that, they try a little harder to fight back and the knives come out. dick’s eyes practically light up when they start slashing around. they think they might have a change against him when dick let’s them take a swipe at his torso, but once they’ve made no more than a superficial cut, he’s grabbing their arm and twisting it until the knife clatters to the ground and they’re wondering how the hell they thought they could win.

the high he’s feeling doesn’t come down once he’s neutralised the threat. in fact, he’s feeling even more jittery when he’s sitting outside the window to your shared apartment, lightly tapping on the window.

he gets a little worried again when you glance over at him, and then at the clock before sighing deeply at the time. you’re still annoyed, but it’s okay. he anticipated that.

you open the window, barely sparing him a glance before walking away.

“it’s late, dick. i could have been asleep.”

“i’m sorry,” he replies, his voice a little breathless when he sees the little pyjama shorts you’re wearing with the hearts on them. you mistake this for him being in pain, which in fairness, he is.

dick has to stop himself from looking too happy when you furrow your brows and rush over to him. “you’re bleeding.”

“just a scratch,” he downplays it, letting your gentle hands help him through the window and onto the couch. he doesn’t resist one bit, allowing himself to wince with each movement.

when you’ve grabbed the first-aid kit and you’re patching him up, his eyes don’t leave your face for even a second. he hates seeing you upset over anything, but he can’t lie. he’s practically giddy when he sees that your expression has changed swiftly from irritation to concern.

you ask him what happened and of course he shields you from the vigilante life, because he’d die before putting you at risk. so all he says is that he’s sorry, he was just distracted tonight.

“i’m sorry,” you sniff, cleaning his cuts and bandaging him up. he doesn’t even need you to be the one to apologise, he’ll gladly say sorry first if it’ll stop you being mad at him. “we argued before and now you’re hurt and—”

he reassures you it isn’t your fault and that he’s the one who’s sorry for upsetting you in the first place and then you’re kissing the bruise on his face and he’s enjoying the way it stings, because your lips are brushing against his skin and all he smells is your vanilla body lotion.

you don’t see the way his lips are twitching into a small, satisfied smirk when you cuddle up next to him and tuck your head under his chin, careful to avoid pressing on his injuries. you feel him relaxing, but you don’t know it’s because he’s gotten exactly what he wanted.

he really doesn’t want you blaming yourself, but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy the way your hand was running through his hair.

“promise me you’ll be more careful, dick. i don’t want you getting yourself hurt this often anymore.”

“i promise i’ll try my best, baby,” he murmurs, voice low and warm as he traces circles on your thigh. he chuckles at the way you pout at him. “it’s not like i do it on purpose.”

a/n cont.; this is darker than anything else i’ve written but i literally couldn’t help it i thought abt this ages ago and then saw this on tiktok and it was like id been possessed:

[fixyourwritinghabits]

Editing Part 4: Worldbuilding Pass

Next up, worldbuilding! We're tackling this before structure, because you don't want to get too far into the weeds, realize a critical component of your story is wrong, and then throw your computer out the window in frustration.

Anyway, when it comes to worldbuilding, there's a lot of moving parts. There is no right or wrong way to worldbuild, but my preferred approach is to worldbuild as the story goes along. Any method works, and you can check out the worldbuilding tag for more. In editing your worldbuilding, you want to think about:

Trimming Front-loading/Info Dumps

When writing fantasy/sci-fi, getting down how the world works can take over the story. In first drafting, this is fine! But when you're trying to clean that draft up, it's better to weave this information in as you go.

Need to explain how the giant mechas guarding the city operate? Maybe your main character is trying to steal some precious alloy from one, giving you opportunity to explain how they work and how society feels about them. Have a magic system that relies on singing tunes? Show that off by having students practicing, or dueling rivals taking it too far.

You probably know by now that the thing you should avoid the most is "as you know" dialogue dumps - characters explaining concepts to each other that they both clearly understand. Another, weaker version of this is the "magic class" trap, where things are explained to the main character and the reader. A classroom environment is fine, but pair worldbuilding with action - demonstrations get out of hand, spells go wrong, etc. Make it fun!

Your World Needs Clear Rules (Sorry)

Listen, this is the part I hate. I have a WIP with the word "Rules" in the title and I'm still figuring out what those rules are. Argh. But the sooner you know the rules, the easier editing will be. The more clear those rules are to the reader, the more impactful breaking them will be.

If the rules of the world (you can't use warp speed too close to a planet's gravitational pull, the same type of magic cancels each other out) and the consequences of breaking them are clear, the pay-off will be satisfying for both you and the reader.

Use Your Environment to Your Full Advantage

You've no doubt heard 'make setting a character' and that's evergreen advice. Some of the best books out there are those where it feels like you could step through the page and into a real place, be it your childhood middle school or Narnia. Getting that feeling, however, is more than just describing a place really well.

Mood - How does the location make you feel? Does a dark, cramped room leave the characters with a feeling of dread? How would that feeling change if it was an overstuffed library with comfortable chairs?

Weather - Beyond the 'dark and stormy night' descriptions, weather impacts our daily lives and is often overlooked. A rain-drenched funeral scenes seems like it's the way to go, but how differently would that scene feel if it was a sunny day with birds singing?

City Versus Countryside - These books are a great reference for description, but also take a step back to compare how different situations would feel both in the setting and to your character. Quiet can mean very different things depending on where you are. A morning fog in the countryside might feel comforting to someone used to it, but to someone new to that environment, it might feel creepy. Think about both your environment and how your character reacts to it based on their backstory.

The Empty Room Problem

This is always a big challenge when moving from the first draft bare bones basics to fleshing things out. How much description is too much? (As a note, it's always okay to overcorrect - you'll have a chance to fix it later!) This post from @novlr has a lot of great questions - but you're still going to narrow it down to the most important details.

Escape the Movie Setting - You cannot describe the room like it's a movie set. Trying to do so is going to be overwhelming, and important details will be lost in the attempt. If you were to describe your room or your favorite coffee shop and could only highlight four or five details, what would you focus on? What gives the reader the essence of the place rather than a list of things that exist there?

Establish the Essentials - Is this your first character's first time in this room? Is it going to be key to several plot-important scenes? Some big, sweeping details when entering - how big it is, what's in it, where the windows are, how it feels, etc - are good to start with. Your character can briefly admire a full bookshelf in the first scene, and then study it in more detail in the second. If you have one scene in this place and spend too much time describing it, you're going to make your reader think it's more important than it is.

Engage the Senses - Does an old room smell musty? Does the coldness of the woods have a sharp taste? Does touching a shelf bring up a lot of dust? How does the lighting in the room make the main character feel?

Getting down the description of a room or setting is not something you'll nail in one shot, but if you approach each scene asking yourself "does this feel like a real place or a white room?" you can narrow down what's missing.

[juviabrainrot]

LET'S GO TO THE FAIR !

PAIRINGS ... d.kaminari, h.sero, e.kirishima x fem!reader

a/n: it's fair season! (at least where i live) and i got the idea to do this. also we're not gonna talk about my tiktok ban crashout but that shit was literally 14 hours i am so dramatic idc. this also isn't proof read (again!!! are we surprised) ALSO ignore how sero's is probably longer than the rest of them bc idk he's bae and needs that extra little ramble

requests are open!

d. kaminari

ik damn well this man is trying to do all the fair games and loses at nearly all of them

and yes, he did win one game at the very least! (it was the one where you have to squirt water into the whole)

for his prize, he got a minion plushie and was mad because when you guys had previously passed, there was a pikachu plushie but it was gone by the time you came back

he only wanted it so he could give it to you since it was "basically his twin", but it's ok because minions are TOTALLY better!! (imo, fight me idc)

you both decided to go on the zipper and halfway through the line, he started getting scared because of the plethora of screams

with lots of reassurance, you two got on there and it was... something!

he screamed like a baby and started crying for his mom at one point

"I'm too young and handsome for my death to happen like this!"

after, he acted nonchalant and like he wasn't just bawling his eyes out

for some reason, he really wanted to go on zero gravity and pretended to climb the walls to take a pic and send it to sero

"wait catch my good side I want to look mysterious"

h. sero

definitely snuck his penjamin in

his plan was to go to the fair 2 days: - day 1: get high af and eat literally every food, play games, and go to the petting zoo - day 2: ride all the rides

literally the first thing he did was go to the corn dog stand and tore up an XL corn dog

next, he attacked a turkey leg and got the juices all over his mouth

did he know? no. did you let him walk around with them decorating his mouth for a while? yes

he was starting to get a little stuffed so he got himself a fresh squeezed lemonade to share and you both walked around the fair grounds

you walked past the basketball stand and he was convinced that he could shoot the hoop with perfection, but ended up bashing the ball into the front of the hoop and it came back and hit him

he gave up and pouted a little so he decided he wanted to pet some goats in the petting zoo

was about to cry when he saw the miniature ponies because he wanted to take one home

made sure no one was around, whipped out his pen and asked the horse if he wanted a hit

before you were about to leave, he decided he wanted to split a funnel cake with you but could only eat four bites before he gave up and left the rest to you

on day two, he bought the unlimited pass for you both and wanted to go crazy on all the rides

the first ride you went on was the thunderbolt and you accidentally crushed him because of how fast it was going + literal air force

forced you to go on the pendulum ride 4 times and the fireball 3 times

went into the fun house and pretended to be a hamster on a hamster wheel in the spinning tunnel, and accidentally kicked a kid that was trying to get in

e. kirishima

like denki, he was also trying to do all the carnival games, but there's one difference - he was actually getting prizes

his favorite game was the hammer and bell one since it showed off how strong he was

started winning so many prizes for you that you had to give some to little kids because you physically couldn't hold them all

you both walked through all the crazy popup shops and got weird/cringe matching shirts ( I am so sexy that even life gets hard / I am life)

he also ate a chicken leg and held his face out with a smile for you to wipe it clean

held your hand the whole time as you walked around and you became one of those cringe couples in the lines even after you swore you wouldn't

he wanted to go on quite literally every ride, even the kiddie rides

his favorite ride was definitely the fireball and rode it 5 times

took loads of pics in the photo booth and put one of the strips in the back of his phone case

ended the night with a romantic ride on the ferris wheel and took tons of pictures to post, some of them you didn't even know he took

©juviabrainrot - please do not copy/repost any of my work on any platform <3

[thefrontmanscockwarmer]

Ruined

Player 001 x reader [SMUT]

Masterist <- Comment on this post to be added to the tag list

Note: takes place during season 1, bc the marble games seemed so prefect for him. Also remember that Korea currency is LESS than American currency.

“Come on (y/n)” young il pulled at your jacket sleeve. You asked him to wake you right as you had to get up for the next game.

“Ughhh, I don’t wanna” you whined.

“(Y/n)(l/n), get out of this fucking bed or I swear to all things earthly, I will drag you by your fucking hair”

“Mmm, you’re gonna pull my hair?” You smile.

“(Y/n) let’s go, come on” he says. You reluctantly get up, dragging your feet as you did so. Scowling at him as he scowled back at you. “Don’t look at me like that”

“Like what?” You yawn and stretch

“Like you hate me. I’m your husband, you like having me around.” You and In Ho joined the games as an opportunity to have fun. Fortunately, this was right before the VIPs formally arrived. You and In Ho were just having some fun.

You passed Oh il Nam, remembering that he also joined the game, he was the that extended the invitation to you. The 3 of you had a one way ticket to freedom town after this game, as the next one was surely a matter of actual life or death (it was the glass bridge).

You and Young il split up to find 2 other players to be partnered with, as it would validate your ’deaths’ following il Nams steps.

You faked a loss at marbles, allowing yourself to get “shot”. You were allowed out of the game room and into the hallways on the outside of the isolated room. Tracking through the hallways you walked into yours and In Hos shared room.

Jumping into the shower and letting the past few days wash off of your skin. You took care of your basic needs, scrubbing your face and hair, removing the dried blood that was caked to your neck. Sighing with relief that you were finally clean. You put on your black silk robe and roamed your way into bed, setting up your skin care routine as tea boiled.

You comfortably sat reading your book, face mask on, tea setting to a perfect temperature when In Ho walked in.

“Hi honey” you said as he threw himself onto your thighs. “How’d your game go?”

“I hate my job.” He declared loudly. You played with his hair as he gripped your thighs, tightly. “You know not having you these past few days has been driving me crazy…” he trails.

“Shower first. I do not want 5 day old ball sweat anywhere near me. You’ll screw up my Ph balance” you say, eyeing him. He sighed dramatically. “Don’t be such an actor, go shower. You can indulge in me later.” Another dramatic sigh.

“Fine.” He said before kissing both of your thighs and getting up “You are so spoiled” he told you as he looked down at you. You smiled widely.

“Oh am I?”

“Yes, you are. Laying in silk sheets, in a silk robe, a ₩50,000 face mask, I bet, reading a book sighed personally by the author that I got you, and probably the most expensive tea someone in Korea could buy, laying in a ₩20,000,000 bed in a trillion won building” he lists. “With me, a man whose net worth is over ₩6 billion.”

“Ohhh my goodness, yes I’m so expensive” you feigned sadness.

“I’m gonna go shower. Care to watch me?” He teased, holding your dainty hand in his.

“Only if carry me to the bathroom” you say. He drops his head with a smile.

“Of course” he picked slid the blanket back, and picked you up, carrying you to the bathroom and gently setting you on the counter. He stood off to the side so he could look in the mirror, some blood was caked onto his collar and he had a streak that ran down his neck and onto his shirt.

He stripped as you watched him, his bare body being scanned by your calculated stare. He chuckled as he stepped out of his boxers.

“Like what you see?” He said with a cocky smirk. He stood between your thigh coming in for a kiss.

“I will after you shower” you say laughing as you pushed him back. He held your hand to his chest and kissed you quickly. Smiling as he moved away before you could slap his shoulder. He entered the shower, you could deny, he was gorgeous. The way water dripped down his abs, and how his hair stuck to his head.

“Use the exfoliation scrub, In Ho” you remind him. “You haven’t showered in like a week.”

“Yes, my love, I’m aware.” He replied, grabbing the container and showing you. The water turned off and he opened the glass door, wrapping a black towel marked ‘his’ on it. A wedding gift from your cousin. You stared at his body, his cock slightly hard and visible through his towel.

“Now, I love what I see” you say as he wraps his arms around, pulling you toward the end of the counter. He lays a kiss on your lips as he presses himself against you. A light hum left your lips. He chuckled into the kiss. Trailing down your neck to your collarbone, sucking and marking you as his.

“Am I allowed to indulge in you now?” He whispered, playing with your clit. He wasn’t asking, he was telling. Not having him for days was driving both of you insane, you were surprised you both made it that far without running off and fucking in a corner.

“Please do, Mr. Front man” you moaned, moving your hand to drop his towel. He wasted no time in pressing his cock into you. You moaned loudly as he did, he groaned into your mouth as your tongues danced together.

“God, I needed this” he says between kisses. He thrusted inside you, but differently than you expected. Not rushed, not rough, but in a love making, I miss you sort of way. “Fuck I love you” he said in your ear before attacking your neck.

“In Ho, I’m close” you whined.

“So am I. I’m so close (y/n)” he replies breathlessly fucking into you. He sped up, racing towards your climax, his threatening to burst. You heard a voice in your room.

“Oh, In Ho. Where are you?”

“Fuck, fuckkkk” he drawled quietly. His orgasm ruined, he looked at you before looking away wanting to avoid your of obvious frustration. Denied an orgasm, and it wasn’t even apart of the sex. He pulled his dick from you, a whine of dissatisfaction left you.

“Babygirl, don’t be upset with me” he said pulling on his towel. Grabbing his mask on the counter. “It’s my boss” he said leaving the bathroom. You followed behind him to see Il Nam standing in the center of your room.

“Ah, Ms. (L/n)” il Nam bowed. You retuned the bow.

“How are today, sir?” You ask. You had already seen him, but you knew better than to interact, you could see that he had a poor soul on the hook for failure.

“very well today, I am getting ready to go to the hospital and live my final days.” He exclaimed. There was no evidence of sadness in his voice, almost like he was happy to be gone. “Watch of Player 456, he has goodness in his heart. I hope he wins.” He says to you before turning to your husband. You turned away from the an walked towards the big screen on the far end of the room, turning it on to watch the rest of the players, Player 456 was shedding tears as he walked back to the common room. You faintly heard conversation:

“I am ready to go, In Ho.” The old man said. “Please meet me in my quarters when it is time to leave” you walked over and said good bye to il nam, vowing to visit him at the hospital when he was all settled in. he gave a gentle kiss on the cheek. In Ho held onto your waist, allowing you to remove his mask.

“I’m assuming there isn’t time now to finish what we started.” You stated lovingly.

“No, my dear, im afraid not. We are officially interrupted and our pleasure for the moment is ruined. I have to work” he says looking deeply into your eyes. You could tell he wanted nothing more than to continue the love making you were both so excited for, but work called.

“Come say good bye before you leave, wont you” you tell him, kissing his shoulder. He placed a kiss on your forehead.

“ I will. And, I’ll be back to finish what I started with you” he winked before letting go of you and disappearing into the closet.

[the-teufort-nine]

Please sir, a horny one for defense to complete the set!

Defense Classes | The Final Three Mercs' Horny Headcanons

NSFW Below!

Heavy:

<3 Listen: this guy grew up in a terrible environment, and then lived with his Mom and sisters before he eventually left to go support them, so he's never really had a chance to have some 'alone' time until he was living away from home.

<3 Pretty pent up, so when he does finally get a chance to jerk it, you better believe he's taking advantage of it.

<3 Like Soldier, he's a pretty private guy. He likes to kiss or hold his partner, but anything beyond that is kept behind closed doors.

<3 Pretty quiet at first, but gets loud after a while, but only if he knows that he's not gonna be heard. Likes to make his partner be noisy tho. ;)

<3 BIG guy. Loves to see his dick give his partner a tummy bulge. Cums sooo much that his partner probably ends up looking pregnant, which usually gets him hard again.

<3 Super into cute outfits and lacy things, but also really likes it when his partner wears his shirt as a nightgown.

<3 Another aftercare king. Will literally research how to be a better lover if he feels like his partner isn't getting enough care (a baseless fear, this man is perfect)

Demo:

<3 You know how alcohol, in high quantities, can negatively impact your sex drive? Yeah, Demo's body is so reliant on alcohol that it actually swings back around and boosts it.

<3 Jerks off usually once a day, for most of the week. If he has a partner, though, he likes to go on for as long as possible, since his job doesn't afford him a lot of personal time.

<3 Likes to give almost more than he likes to recieve. Getting his partner to cum usually gets him off, too.

<3 Loud when he's drunk, loud when he's getting his rocks off. Doesn't even try to hide it.

<3 Really likes to make out with his partner while he's fucking them, kissing along their neck and running his hands across their body. Big thigh and tummy guy, I could see him doing thigh-fucking.

<3 Likes themed slutty outfits and crop tops. Also loves stockings.

<3 Sleepy snuggles post clean up is a must. He's not a smash 'n dash typa guy, he want's to be close to his partner for as long as he can be.

Engineer:

<3 Honestly? This man needs to jerk off wayyyy more than he does.

<3 He's so absorbed in his work that he usually forgets to take care of his needs, and that ends up affecting his mood and performance.

<3 When he finally does take a break, he's gonna put the Gunslinger to work. I know that thing has a vibration mode; I feel it in my bones. That, or he'd make a custom-built sex toy.

<3 If he's got a partner though? Yeah, say goodbye to the very concept of walking. They're getting lured into his workshop and bent over the nearest surface ASAP.

<3 B R E E D I N G K I N K. Want's to be a dad sooo bad, and nothing turns him on more than imagining his partner being nice 'n round with his baby. Him being so pent up means that he's gonna be dumping loads of cum into his partner, so if he can get them pregnant, he will.

<3 Heavily into praising his partner. Will call them every sweet Southern name in the book while he's pounding into them. Utilizes the Gunslinger to make his partner cum as much as possible, leaving them overstimulated and twitching by the time he's done.

<3 Mostly keeps his voice down, but is known to yell or curse when he's cumming. Works very hard to make his partner scream, in a good way, of course. ;)

<3 Believes in the cowboy hat code. If you wanna get him away from his work, just steal his hat and put it on your head. He'll get the message.

<3 Cleans you up afterwards and practically worships you. If you can manage to ask for something, he'll get it for you right away.

[thatanimewriter]

ENIGMA.

➳ request: hihi! It's one of my first times submitting an ask, so sorry if it's not specific enough!!😓 for HSR, could you do a Honkai Impact 3rd Elysia reader? Like, loves humanity, friendly, sweet, flirty, etcetc. Also rather mysterious and keeps to themself at times! If you could include Sunday, Dan Heng IL, and/or Aventurine it would be great! :) Could be describing how they first met and first impressions of reader or something. Thank you <33

➳ character/s: dan heng (il), sunday, aventurine

➳ warnings: mention of food (aventurine), astral express reader (dan heng), assistant reader (sunday, aventurine)

➳ notes: thank you for the request, i love these boisss, decided to go with first impressions up to the point where they like you

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 / 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭  / 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐬 / 𝐰𝐢𝐩 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

── 𝐃𝐀𝐍 𝐇𝐄𝐍𝐆.

he didn't know someone like you could exist, it felt like a lie

was initially a lil iffy about you when you first joined the express, but warmed up to you

isn't used to how nice you are, though he appreciates it

initially started noticing you when he found you sifting through the data bank

bonded over a mutual interest and once, you made him his favourite tea and visited him to share new info about said interest

kinda wishes he had your same love for life, but he worries you'll get yourself hurt

you did once, and he'd never felt such a need to give you a hug and hide you away like a dragon protecting its hoard

maybe that's something he needs to reconsider-

── 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐘.

he thought you were remarkably sweet that it made him suspicious you wanted something from him

hides his face with his wings from you too often to count

he can't cope with compliments when they're from you

probably thinks you're a little bit naive with how much you love people and have trust in humanity

but also glad you haven't been irrevocably ruined by trauma

likes that you also take time for yourself among all the socialising

you organise all of his papers when he's out on errands with robin and he comes back to everything where he wants it

he will often leave your favourite snack on the desk as a thank you if he knows it's messy and you have to clean

── 𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐄.

flirts back hardcore that you no longer seem flirty to others

he doesn't really think much of it, just copies your energy

loves that you'll always bring him food for his break because he forgets-

also wishes that you weren't involved with the ipc, because you're just too nice for them

eventually starts treating you more as a friend because the thought of you being used by the ipc gives him the ick

knows he's in danger when he could still feel your body against his when you hugged for the first time 5 hours ago

finds himself wondering whether you're truly like that or if there's something hidden beneath that

guess he has to get closer to you to find out...

[linics]

comforting bllk characters

featuring : i. rin, m. reo, m. kaiser

a/n : hi so ummm im back .!!! did you guys miss me ?? anyways my writers block was HORRIBLE but im recovered now i think. let’s ignore how ooc kaisers probably is because its based off of fics ive seen + edits. i’ll redo it later.

i. rin

as i referenced in the one where they comfort you, rin would be very closed off emotionally. even so, he’s like a fucking book with how he behaves.

it doesn’t take you long to realize just how much the u-20 game affected him. as much as he tried to turn his annoyance into motivation and actually doing something with it, sometimes it would become too much. whether that looks like him overworking himself or lashing out, it’ll always show through.

the most you could do is make sure he stays safe during it. showing up to the field at weird hours, ruining your sleep schedule, just to give him more water and a ride home considering he ran all the way there.

“why’re you here?” he’d scoff, panting slightly from all the work.

“woke up early, thought i’d stop by,” you lied, yes, but it was fine. he didn’t need to know you’d set at least 10 alarms to make sure you’d wake up and stay up.

he didn’t respond, so you just handed him a large water bottle. it was a spare, but it also was the biggest you’d had, so it’d have to make do.

“thanks.” he mumbled, his voice barely audible. the cold barrier that’d been there slowly flexing and melting away.

he wasn’t someone that you could just befriend instantly. every time the two of you hung out, you’d have to prove to him that you were there to stay. it was gradual.

most people gave up after the first couple of times when they realized they were practically back to where they started. that was except for you.

after taking a few sips of the water, he hands it back to you, not wanting it to interfere with his training. you grabbed it from him, then wandered over to the sidelines.

“where are you going?” he asked, though, if you paid enough attention, you’d notice he was anxious. very anxious.

“just over here, i don’t want you to hit me..” you said calmly, trying to lighten it slightly. you were careful to not wander too far from him.

he didn’t say anything to you afterwards, but you noticed the tension loosened again.

even though he wouldn’t let you interfere — which you have tried — he’d still let you care for him. maybe he knew it was because you’d get anxious and blame yourself if he didn’t let you help in some way.

m. reo

he would be anxious. i don’t care if this is ‘out of character’. for the most part, yeah he doesn’t stress much because he hasn’t had much to worry about. but the second he gets stressed out, he stresses, a lot. and because he hasn’t been exposed to much stress, he’s absolutely clueless on how to cope.

he’d be laying in bed — at his desk now? nope, he’s pacing. point being, he just can’t sit still, and god, he won’t stop babbling about nonsense.

“reo.” for the hundredth time, he’d cut you off completely. this was coming from the guy who felt it was rude to type when other people were typing, so you let it slide.

“and then — oh yeah, did you say something?” finally, some recognition.

“come sit down in front of me,” you pat the bed, clearing off the blankets so he could just crawl in. he did just that, sitting in front of you, his back facing you.

“like this?” he was always so hesitant with you. but you just responded in a hum of approval. you carefully started combing through his hair with your fingers, occasionally grazing his scalp and briefly massaging it. his hair was silky and clean.

he became quieter, his muscles slowly relaxing and calming.

“so, you wanna tell me what’s wrong?” you spoke quietly, careful to not ruin the calmness of the moment.

“it’s nothing big—” you stopped in your movements as he said that, and he knew that meant you were displeased.

“okay, okay, fine..” he mumbled.

m. kaiser

okay so.. i feel like now’s the perfect time for me to say i have not gotten to where he is in the manga. um! so what i planned to do for this is write how i think he acts, then correct it later on whenever i do catch up. i think i get him a bit though ?? currently i see him as a self destructive possibly alcoholic man. who takes after his dad who was abusive and an alcoholic, mom wasn’t in the picture. no clue how any of that relates to soccer but sure! i’ve heard a lot that he hits himself / chokes himself as a way of coping (after doing some research it’s for ideas. okay.) so that’s the route we’re gonna take with that. no clue if it’s true or not.

he really didn’t get it. no matter how much he tried, he couldn’t figure himself out. how was he supposed to understand others and beat others if he couldn’t even understand himself? he needed ideas—

was it illogical? yes, absolutely. did it work? also yes.

adrenaline from anything could be put to use to benefit. so, he did the thing he’s done for ages. maybe he’s began to rely on it for too long so he reached to it for the smallest things, he didn’t really care, though.

it worked, and until it stopped working, he wouldn’t stop abusing his body for his brain. it was nothing more than a vessel, anyways.

“kaiser.” even through your voice, his choking movements didn’t falter.

“just fuckin’ stop for a moment-” you were the only person he really let talk to him like that, even though it wasn’t often that you took advantage of it.

it worked enough for him to stop, just for a moment and catch his breath. it’s not like he wanted to pass out, anyways. the second he let go, you grabbed his hands.

“what is it?” he huffed, his voice groggy and rough.

“don’t do that. ‘what is it?’, you know exactly what it is.” it wasn’t uncommon for you to be mad at him or mildly rude, but even keeping it up for this long was abnormal.

“it works, well, it would’ve, if you didn’t disrupt me.” he rolled his eyes.

“that’s not the point and you know it.”

“then what is it?”

there was a silence for a few moments before you just decided to ask outright.

“what do you need help with this time?” you were still a bit petty, but you just hoped he wouldn’t pay too much attention to it.

“doesn’t concern you.”

“i’ll make it concern me. tell me.”

“why would i do that?”

god, was he always this annoying?

“okay, fine, whatever it is, i won’t interfere. how about you tell me, and if i can’t think of a solution by tomorrow, you can do whatever this is.”

there was another long silence as he considered it. it was appealing — all he had to do was tell you, and you could do all the work. the backup was there and it was exactly what he wanted. there wasn’t much time left in the day anyways.

“fine. tomorrow first thing.”

[lostinlovingrevery]

He's Definitely Obsessed With You: Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Just Kiss Already

Plot: You and Logan are finally beginning to navigate your relationship and your new lives together. Logan is carrying dark secrets, and finally opens up to you.

A/N: Oh lordy I'm finally done with it. It turned out so fluffy in the beginning and angsty in the end. It'll get better! (Then worse)

Warnings: Mentions of war, past history of violence, anxiety, a bit of jealously, a bunch of fluff towards the beginning, angst near the end, mentions of a past assault (not logan or reader) Logan just needs a hug, so does reader. Also logan is probably not super accurate to his character..?

Word Count: 7470

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Years of aching for someone you weren’t sure cared about you the same you did for them was forgotten about the moment Logan came back into your life.

The comfort and safety you always felt in his presence resumed, the admiration of the man you grew to know for over a year in a jungle had only grown stronger as you watched him adjust to a new life and do it with grace. Perhaps it’s because he’s done it before, he knew the drill. Yet still, you found yourself falling for him all over again. You knew him as Logan Howlett, soldier. While you both shared a closeness, there was still a war, there was always an air between you that prevented anything further developing. The most that would happen between you would be conversations of the future, lingering touches, and side glances. Now you could know him as Logan Howlett, friend. Although that’s not necessarily what you’d call your relationship.

Things were unspoken between you.

You found yourself truly looking forward to going out now, because he was going to be there. Although you didn’t go to the wild parties that Rose likes. That wasn’t Logans style and honestly wasn’t yours either, albeit you did it to please Rose and told yourself that it was a good idea even if you ended up dreading the whole ordeal anyway. You and Logan found yourselves doing more…Domestic activities. Movies, festivals, dinners, lunches, the local bar, even the gym. 

“You wanna go see the Exorcist tomorrow night?” 

Logan turned his attention away from the drunken people very badly singing karaoke at the small stage the bar had. The karaoke machine was a new addition to the lively bar, adding more atmosphere to the place that was already unique in it’s burnt orange and brown color scheme, neon signs, and pop art littering the walls. You were sitting in a booth together, his arm draped loosely around you. He quirked his brow in questioning. 

“The Exorcist?..” He asked, then smirked. “Ain’t that a movie about demons and all?”

“Yeeesss.” You respond with a singsong voice, meeting his eyes. He sipped his whiskey, not breaking eye contact from you. 

“No.” He says after firmly setting his beer back on the table. He licked his lips of the droplets of whiskey left on them, and you couldn’t help but stare and think, ‘I could clean that up for you’

You think a lot of things about Logan now. You don’t plan to stop. At one point you would’ve felt guilty to think something of a friend. You and Logan could not be considered friends anymore.

“Why not?” You asked in a whine. “I wanna see it! It looks good! My friend Marie says it was cool!”

“It’s gonna scare you. Just like that last movie.” He says. “Then I gotta listen to you whine about it. You’re gonna call me and complain about being too scared to sleep. Then neither of us will get any sleep.” 

“So?” You grin. “There’s an easy solution to that.”

“Is that so?”

“You just come stay with me after, and then I won’t be too scared. Your presence will scare off all the bad guys.”

Logan raised his brows up. “Yeah? Where am I gonna sleep then? Your couch?” He leans in, and you felt a deep crimson blush burning at your cheeks under his flirty stare. “Not very comfortable.” 

“Maybe you wouldn’t have to sleep on the couch.” You say, and you could feel your breath hitching at the idea. Logan smiled, but it wasn’t his usual sweet smile he gave you. This was something darker and more…lustful, that you were beginning to see more often when you two talked. Lately, all your conversations turn to something flirty, indiciating the rising tensions between you. 

He opened his mouth to say something, but Rose interrupted.

“Alright! Here you go, me and Adam got refills for you guys.” She says, as her- and Adam, who was the leather daddy you seen her makeout with the night Logan came home. Apparently he’d made enough of an impression on her to keep him around. You and Logan separated, occurring to both of you just how close you’ve gotten in the booth. He never removed his arm from your shoulders though, his hand gently squeezing the shoulder it was resting on, as you gave him a side glance, noticing a hint of pink on his ears. 

Things were very unspoken between you.

The way your relationship has developed since he returned was something you thought you would only dream of. 

You got to see more of that playful, boyish charm Logan had that you saw hints of in Vietnam. The charm that made you always crave to see more. Not that you couldn’t love his broody self as well. Each had their own perks that made you smile, where you couldn’t help but think ‘he’s so cute.’ The way he’d tease you, not in a mean way, more loving as he pokes fun at things such as your outfits, though you’d see the sliver of desire come across his eyes when you come in with those high-waisted jeans and low cut top, highlighting your figure for him in ways he didn’t get to see with your army scrubs. You watched him open up to the world. He’d gotten a great job at the local lumber mill, and even fixed his cabin up a bit, considering it was left empty for years while he was gone. He decorated, got new furniture and everything. Rose implied it was to impress you but you think he was simply just trying to…Make a home for himself after being gone for so long. 

He was taking up hobbies like boxing, which you certainly enjoyed watching, as you’d go to the gym with him occasionally in attempts to committing to your own workout (news flash, you aren’t very successful). You weren’t exactly a fan of the fighting, you didn’t like seeing Logan getting punched, but lord the intense concentration on his face, how his brows crease as he scowls at his opponent, the way sweat covered his body head to toe after brawling for an hour. You may not have understood the appeal of fighting each other. A male thing, it must be. You watched the boys in Vietnam do the same thing, practicing boxing and wrestling and all, although that was probably more practice than a hobby.. You did understand the appeal of observing. At least, observing him. 

You watched Logan as he quickly dodged and punched his opponent, effectively knocking him back. A few more swings and it was a knock out. You couldn’t help but smile to yourself, shaking your head as you still didn’t understand the whole appeal. Male ego? Still, there was a certain…attraction to seeing how powerful he really can be. You knew that he was actually holding back when he boxes. If he applied his real physical strength- the mutant aspect to his strength, the other side would be down in seconds. Instead, Logan used boxing as a way to focus on his own movements, teaching him to be quick on his feet and defensive.

Logan was watching you as you were distracted with your gym bag, taking a heavy drink of water from his bottle, he took in your outfit, the way it hugged your body and curves, you had worn a workout outfit before, shorts and tank top and it was driving him wild as he kept an eye on you while you were running on the treadmill. Seems like no matter what you do, or wear, you always drive him crazy.. Grabbing a towel, he patted his forehead and hands dry, as he walked to the otherside of the ring where you were, perched on a bench. He nodded to his opponent, a coworker from work, before climbing over the ropes and hopping to the ground. You always waited for him to finish up when you went to the gyn with him, and the both of you would go to lunch together after. 

“Enjoy the show?” He grinned. You rolled your eyes. 

“Enjoy the senseless punching each other? Totally.” You scoffed, but it was merely teasing. You were glad to see him enjoying himself. You stood up from the bench, going to grab your bag, but he picked it up for you instead, stepping close to grab it, his chest bumping your shoulder and you turned to look at him. Your eyes met and you felt that familiar electricity run between you both.

He looked down at you and the look he gave you felt like he wanted to eat you alive. It led to a warm feeling that sunk low in your belly. You noticed Logans nostrils flared and his eyes darkened. 

“You sure you didn’t enjoy that sweetheart?” He says in a low voice, “Watching me?” 

He lowered his head down towards you, and you felt like your heart was in your throat. You saw his eyes flick down to your lips. You swallowed but before you could say anything-

“Hey Logan, good job today man-” 

Logans coworker and sparing opponent came up behind him, smacking him on the back and starting conversation, forcing Logan to step away from you, the heat of the moment evaporating. Although you saw him glance at your while his friend talked, and there seemed to be the lingering look of desire, excepting softer. Yearning. 

You knew though it wasn’t always happy for Logan though. You knew of the nightmares he’d have, the fits of panic. There was things he didn’t tell you. You didn’t ask. You knew if and when he’s ready to talk, he will. 

You found yourself happy with Logan, the way things are. You had felt such need for him for so long, and now that he was here- you surely thought you’d be desperate for his love and attention. Simply though, you enjoyed the time with him. Things didn’t feel…rushed. Maybe it was because in Vietnam, you constantly wondered if you would wake up to an attack, or a bomb, or something. You savored the small joys, like a warm Coke, or music on the radio, or just being able to laugh with Logan. Now though you’re able to enjoy those not just because you don’t have to worry about threats on your life, but because now you know that you and Logan had the rest of your lives to understand each other, for something to work out on it’s own time. It had be a couple years since he came back, and you both moved towards something steadily. 

1975, Alberta, Canada

You were working your shift at the hospital. The hospital had just built a new wing- an emergency center, and you were one the lucky nurses to get transferred over. Apparently your history of being in Vietnam made them think you’d be a wonderful addition to an emergency wing where being quick on your feet, and attention to detail was important. 

Of course they were right but you would have liked to had a choice in the matter. 

Especially since they decided you were to be the charge nurse as well. Without asking. 

Now you were bombarded with all sorts of new duties. Stuff that you didn’t even know existed in doing. Honestly, you believed that this was just the Chief of Staffs way of dumping stuff he didn’t want to deal with on you. You had medical forms to fill out, request forms to put in, and patients to worry about-

Huh, that felt like deja vu….

You were out in the main lobby, acting as triage for now. They were quick in putting you in charge of nurses, supply and drug lists, and various other adminstrative work, yet not quick in hiring more nurses to help you out. Anytime you complained, your boss would remind you,

 “What an absolute honor it is for you to even have this job, with all the womens rights going on. Those ladies would kill to have a job like yours! I mean, i’m sure you wouldn’t be able to find a job THIS progressive at another hospital…” 

What a dick.

“Hey honey,” You heard Rose behind you, and you turned in your chair and gave her a sneering smile.

“Well hello-” You greet sarcastically. “Hows life on the 3rd floor?”

“Whew! Someones bitter.” Rose chuckled. “It’s great, actually. I get breaks, lunches, and all I gotta do is assist the doctors with no extra responsibilities. No uh, administration work, or lack of staffing, or y’know, dealing with someone who shoved something up their ass.” She bragged.

You scoffed. “You got it completely wrong. I’m very happy here. Mind you.” You rolled your eyes. 

“Yeah, you totally look happy.” Rose crosses her arms, an amused smile as she looked down at you in your seat. She looked up, and an even more amused look came across her face. “Although I think your day is about to get better.”

“What?” You blinked, before turning to see who she was talking about. 

You would be embarrassed by how fast you smiled and got up from your chair, but honestly you could’ve cared less. 

Logan had walked in, wearing those jeans you loved on him, a jacket resting over a flannel, and a white t-shirt. He does like his layers, but in snowy Canada- you needed it. He spotted you, and smiled as you both approached each other in the lobby- which was fairly empty, meeting in the middle. 

“What are you doing here?” you asked. 

“You going on lunch soon? Figured I take you out, since you’ve seem so stressed lately…” He smiles. 

“Oh-” Your shoulders slacked. “That’s sweet, my lunch was an hour ago though…” You pursed your lips together, “Sorry.”

“Oh, well, how about a break then? I’ll…get you a candy bar or something.” He says, a small shrug of his shoulders, his smile fading into something more genuine and close. You perked up.

“Yeah, that actually sounds good, I can take a break. Wait for me outside, I’ll be right back.” You hold your hand up, turning to go back to your desk and say goodbye to Rose. She was watching you guys in amusement as you walked back to her, grabbing your jacket off the back of your chair, and your pager off your desk, and shooting her a Don’t you dare say anything look. If you thought she was riding on you hard before Logan came back, she got ten times worse. She says the tension between you two was practically unbearable. You have no idea what she’s talking about.  She gave you a knowing smile and you rolled your eyes, turning around and pulling your jacket on as you walked back towards the entrance, letting another nurse know you were going on break and to page you if anything is needed. 

You met Logan outside, where he was currently banging on a vending machine with his hand. You smiled at the sight, this tall lumbering man, scowling at the machine. 

“Yknow you need to give it money first?” You called out to him, and he lifted his head and smirked. 

“Ate my quarters.” He says. 

“Watch- and learn.” You wink. You reached into your jacket, pulling out a few quarters, sticking them into the coin slot, you pushed in the slot- but not fully, as you reached into the vending slot, able to pull it open just enough to grab the candy bar- and pull back the coin slot, your quarters still in place. You pulled the quarters out, and held up the candy bar in victory as you tilted your head, and beamed victoriously. 

Logan chuckled warmly. “Ain’t that stealing bub?”

You mock gasped, “Me? No way.” You say, holding your hand out, you gave him the quarters. 

“I was supposed to get you the candy bar yknow.”

“You did.” You say nonchalantly as you opened the wrapper, breaking off a piece to hand to him, before biting into the candy yourself, humming happily at the treat- much needed after the day you’ve been having. “Thank you-” You add as you chew. He shrugged, eating his piece of candy you shared with him. “So, anything exciting going on today?” You asked.

“No, just watched tv.” He says. “Started reading that book you suggested.”

Your eyes went wide and you smiled big, “Really? What you think?”

“Pretty good so far, I’m only on the first chapter though.” He shrugs. He glanced around, clearly thinking about something. “You wanna go to Reillys tonight?” 

“Reilly’s? Sure, I’m in.” You nodded, taking another bite out of your candy bar. “You want me to see if Rose and Adam-”

“I always actually thinking just me and you.” 

Your heart fluttered. 

“I mean, I know we do stuff all the time but…” He shrugged. “Just…Something, so we can talk.” 

“We’re talking right now…” You tease gently, rocking your body back and forth, but the blush on your cheeks told Logan you thoroughly agreed with the idea of going out, just the two of you. 

“Different kind of talking.” He says. “The kind where you wear something pretty, and I buy you a drink.” 

You couldn’t hide your giddiness at his words, letting out a small breath as your blush ran deeper, you looked up at him and nodded. “Yeah, that sounds nice…” You say tilting your head. 

He looked relieved for a moment, before returning to his usual demeanor, as he leaned over you, looking down at you like he was going to eat you alive. “So it’s a da-”

Your pager went off, and you groaned. “Sorry.”

“They can’t survive 5 minutes without you, huh?” He grumbles.

“Apparently not.” You turned your pager off. “I gotta go, but thanks for the candy bar Lo-” you hold up the empty wrapper, you reached for his hand, wrapping your hand around his, and squeezing it. He squeezed it back. “So tonight?”

“I’ll pick you up at 7. Sound good?”

“Great.” 

You began to let go, but he lifted your hand up, kissing the back of it as you watched him, his eyes making contact with yours, before finally he let go. You bit your lip, trying to hide your fluster, quickly turning away to go back into the hospital, as you felt butterflies go through your body. As you tried to go back to work, you couldn’t stop thinking about what you wanted to wear tonight. 

The day went by slow as hell- mainly because you couldn’t stop watching the clock. You got off at 4, giving you nearly 3 hours to get home and get ready to go out. 

The entire time you wondered if this was the start for you and Logan. After 5 years, becoming such close friends, sharing intimate moments, and shared connections in a similar past- you couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. Logan was the person for you. You denied that idea a long time, purely just a person who cared deeply for the people you found closest to you. Now though, you couldn’t deny the rapid flutter of your heart. You thought back of all the ‘close call’ moments you had with Logan. Moments where you nearly kissed, admitted your feelings- usually moments that got interrupted by something or other. You always took that to mean that maybe it just wasn’t your time yet, but you felt a charge with Logan today. The way he came all the way down to see you at work, to ask you out tonight when he could’ve just called you when you got off, because he knew your hours- surely he had been thinking about you as well.

When you got home, you tried your best to keep your cool. You didn’t tell Rose initially- but your nerves started to get to you. What if you were overthinking it? What if you dress up to nice and give off the wrong impression? Rose though, could read you- the way you were nervously pacing around the house as you anxiously cleaned real quick before you got ready. 

“What is going on with you?” She asks, following you to your room, as you pulled open your closet and started searching your outfits. 

“I- Nothing!” You say, but you start blushing, and cover you face. “Okay, I think Logan asked me out tonight, and he said something about wearing something pretty but I don’t know I uh…” You bit your lip. “I’m wondering if I took it wrong.”

“Okay, hold up- time out. Logan asked you out?!” Her voice pitched up as she stepped into the room.

“I don’t know! He said he wanted me and him to go out to Reillys- just me and him, to “talk”, and then when I pointed out we do that all the time and he said the kind of talking where I where something pretty and he buys me a drink.” You explain, all in one breath as anxiety wracked you. You didn’t know why you were so nervous, it was Logan, one of your best friends, you didn’t need to be nervous over him but you were.

Rose stared at you like you were insane. “Okay, first, breathe.” She says holding her hands up. “Second of all. It’s a date.”

You sigh as you took in a breath. “I don’t know what to wear it’s- been awhile.”

“Oh, I know.” Rose looked you up and down. “Could’ve had some practice while he was still gone but noooo.” 

“Rose-” You whined.

“Alright calm down- Lets start with whatchu got in that closet of yours.”

You and Rose spent the next hour trying to put together the perfect outfit. She convinced you to wear a black, satin slip dress, something that complimented your figure perfectly- while still remaining neutral enough- seeing as they were all the rage and often seen worn in bars anyway. She helped you with your hair and makeup, complimenting your features while keeping a more natural look. Rose herself was all about the wild makeup- flashy colors, paint as much as you could, but since this was a possible “first date”, she agreed something more natural and light was appropriate. You picked your colors that complimented your skin tone well, and did your hair in your favorite style. You thought you looked pretty nice- but nerves still crept at you.

You were no strange for looking nice, but you really haven’t been on a date in years. It wasn’t like you didn’t know how flirt- considering you and Logan been flirting for over a year since your reunion. You wondered if this was what it was between you and Logan, would things be different? How is this going to impact your relationship? 

Rose noticed your sudden lackluster demeanor, her hand going to your back. 

“He’s gonna love this.” She smiles warmly at you. “The man is TOTALLY obsessed with you already. This is gonna send him through the roof! Lookatchu!” she coos.

You giggled, shaking your head. “Thank you.”

“I’m just so glad to see my girl finally growing up.” Rose says, with fake emotion in her voice as she pretends to wipe a tear from her eye, it made you laugh more- helping you ease your nerves. 

You opened your mouth to retort her comment, but the landline started ringing. Wondering if it was Logan, you quickly went to answer it. 

“Hello?”

You heard a man asking for your name.

“This is she?” You respond, a little confused.

He said your name again. “It’s Frank.”

“Frank?- Frank Jones?” You say in surprise, as the doctor, a man you considered your mentor years ago from Vietnam, came to your picture. “Wow, it’s been awhile, how are you?”

“Uh..Fine. Listen, you okay?” 

“Yeah…” You say slowly. “Why?”

“Nothing, nothing. Just checking on you.” He says. “Did you ever end up going to med school?” 

“Well, no I just hadn’t really-”

“That’s fine. Listen, be careful, okay?” 

“Frank, what are you-?”

“I know you and Logan Howlett are friends.” His voice suddenly toward low, and warning.

You blinked, as you looked at the phone in confusion. Your brows creased, as you felt something weird turn in your stomach. 

“You…Know Logan?”

“I can’t stay on long. I’m just calling to check on you. You need to be careful, especially around Howlett. Don’t get involved in anything.”

Before you could respond, the line went dead. You stared at the phone as you heard the beeps, turn into a flat line, before you hung up the landline. Rose looked at you in questioning. 

“That was…weird.” You muttered. 

“Who was that?” 

“A doctor I worked under in Vietnam.” You look at her. “He was really cryptic though, and he knew me and Logan were friends, I don’t think I ever told him about Logan. He told me I needed to be careful.” 

Rose raised a brow, then crossed her arms. “Okay, I was excited, now I’m scared.” She says. “Why would this guy conveniently call you when you’re about to go on a date with him?”

You shrugged, chewing on your lip. Since Logan had come back, you knew he was carrying something, a weight on his shoulders. He never told you what though.  All you knew was him being apart of a operative CIA team and he left it. Anytime you two talked about Vietnam, or anything regarding it- he’d get this haunted look on his face, like he was going to be sick. So, you never forced him to talk about it. Sometimes it would just come up, it being an impactful part of your life- something you still try to find meaning in today, understand what it did to you and your future. There was a time you never wanted to think about it, but then there’s times it’s all you wanted to think about. Logan though, seemed to never want to go back to it. Whatever he’s done, whatever he’s seen, it was enough for him to want to forget. 

You wondered if Frank Jones knew something about it. Was it bad enough that he had to warn you? You never felt unsafe with Logan. He has been nothing but respectful and safe- not just to you, but the people around you. Rose has stated multiple times that just having Logan nearby has made her feel more comfortable as well. 

“Are you okay?” Rose asked, putting a hand on your shoulder, you looked at her, and nodded.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll..talk to Logan about it later. Or maybe try to find Franks number, call him back or something tomorrow.” You say. She nods.

“Maybe I should go with you…” She says. You saw the worry on her face. Rose was never the type to be fearful or shy away from anything. You smiled.

“It’s fine.” You say. “I’m just going to enjoy the evening, right?” 

Rose forced a smile, but you could tell she now seemed hesitant to let you go off alone. Before you could say anything else, you both heard knocking your door. 

“That’s probably him-” You say, as you attempt to shrug off the weirdness of that phone call. You went down stairs, immediately stopping at a mirror to check your hair and makeup- Rose following you, before you went to the front door and opened it. 

You were a bit taken away by how nicely dressed Logan was. So, this is a date

He was wearing a clean white button up dress shirt, tucked into dark blue jeans, and his typical leather jacket over the shirt. His hair was slicked back, and he looked a mixture of nervous- and excited to see you. You noticed one arm behind his back.

Any worries you had originally went to the back of your head as you took in his handsome figure. It was that you never seen Logan dressed nice- but he was dressing nice for you.

Logan seemed to have the same reaction to you, his eyes trailing over your body, and you see his jaw tense up. 

“You…You look beautiful.” He says softly. A deep blush came across your cheeks, and you took a deep breath to regain your composure. 

“Thank you,” you say politely. “You don’t look so bad yourself?” You smiled, giving him a knowing look. He chuckled, looking down at himself, almost as if he was embarrassed.

“I got you these.” He says, dropping his arm from behind him, and pulling out a bouquet of flowers. “I…Thought you’d like em.” 

They were Peonies- your favorite flower. You remembered months ago walking past the local flower shop with him, and you had gushed over how beautiful they were. Honestly, they made you think of him- the way they start as all closed, before slowly opening up as they become exposed to warmth, the sun, and water. It's what you think of Logan, the way he was always closed up in himself, only to finally begin to open up, as you watched him blossom from the quiet and reserved soldier, to a man finally accepting a life full of joy and possibly…love.

You were surprised, he remembered, and even went out of his way to bring you a bouquet. 

“Lo- they’re-” You laughed softly taking them. “They’re beautiful! Thank you!” He nodded in acknowledgement, you turned back to the house, “Let me put them in some water and we can go-”

“Here girly, I got them, you go on.” Rose came to the rescue, grabbing the bouquet. “Hi Logan.”

“Hey Rose,” Logan nodded politely to her, sticking his hands in his pockets casually. “How are you?”

“Fine.” She smiles. “Go on you two, go on your date.” She urges. Still blushing- a warm heat spread across your face, you turned back to Logan. “I won’t wait up!-” You heard Rose call out as you shut the door behind you. He smirked, taking his hand out of his pocket, and reaching for yours.

“Ready?”

When you arrived at the bar, you both agreed for opting to the small table towards the back, allowing you a little privacy in your conversations in the bar, which was packed as usual on a Saturday night. Logan was a complete gentleman, pulling your chair out for you and pushing it in as you sat. 

“What would you like to drink?” He asks, 

You gave him your order, and he left to go up to the counter to get them. You sat at your table and waited, you took in the atmosphere, adjusting your dress a few times and playing with your hair. Your eyes turned to the counter, where you saw Logan standing, palms pressed to the counter- clearly waiting for your drinks, but something you noticed.

His head was turned, talking to someone. A lady who looked to be around your age, with dark hair that went past her shoulders. She was absolutely beautiful, and she was looking at Logan in a way that twisted your stomach. 

It was no secret that Logan turned heads, and before it never really go to you- perhaps because you knew you were just friends at the time, that you didn’t have a right to be jealous (although it had struck your mind). Logan had never entertained anyone though, and no one has ever approached Logan while you guys were out together- although you definitely seen the stares. You honestly had never considered other women flirting with him- or him flirting with other women, because you yourself had not flirted with anyone- except him.

Maybe this time it was because you two were actually moving forward. Although you couldn’t say that with certainty. You just did not like the eyes she was making towards Logan. You couldn’t see his face, and his body language was fairly neutral, but you felt a small irritation in the fact that he was even talking to her. 

Get a grip, it’s a bar, people talk.

You saw her laugh, flipping her hair a bit, and her hand went to his forearm

Oh for gods sake. 

The bartender brought the drinks, and he grabbed them, a polite nod to her before turning back to you. You felt a small relief that he wasn’t sticking around to talk to her- whoever she was. 

“Here you go.” He handed you your drink, then moved to sit next to you. You smiled up at him, before turning to sip on the straw, before glancing at him again.

“Who was that girl you were talking to?”

Real smooth.

“Hm?” He looked up at you as he took a drink from his whiskey, he leaned back in his chair. “Oh, I don’t know. Some new person in town.” 

You forced a smile and nodded, and Logan seemed to sense your slight tension- a noticeable change when just a few moments ago you were happy and joking around. He leaned forward towards the table again, and he grabbed your hand, holding it on the table as he looked at you.

“So, how was the rest of your day?” 

You relaxed at his warm tone, the way he started a new conversation. You answered his question, and you both fell into a deep conversation- the way you normally do. Not just about your days, but you would turn towards anything. Recently, it was the politics happening in the States, where mutants were being treated as if they were some sort of criminals. Some folks in government were trying to bring back the bill over mutant regulation, the same bill that had been shot down over a year ago. It bothered you- and worried you greatly that mutants were still getting flack in a time of great social change. Canada hadn’t seemed to address any issue of mutants, possibly because there’s no actual “problem” to address, and maybe it made you a little more thankful that you moved to this country. Something in you though, your heart tugged at the thought of those people getting mistreated. 

Logan though, always knew the right thing to say- to put your mind at ease. 

During the night, Logan complimented you, not just your physical looks, but the type of person you were. He always had a hand on you, usually holding your hand, but sometimes he’d reach out- a soft smile on his face as he’d cup your cheek. His thumb rubbing softly against your skin, making your eyes want to flutter shut. 

There was a new energy charging between you, as you both began to feel open to something newer between you, something more romantic. 

You never noticed the dark haired woman again, even as she sat at the bar counter- staring and watching you both continue on your night.

After, you and Logan strolled through the town, admiring the night life and people watching. Logan, normally keeping an arm around your shoulder, had one around your waist, keeping you close to him. You laughed, and you flirted, you teased each other. You felt warmth in you, the way he kept you so close- almost protectively. 

It was getting late, and you both knew that it was getting close to the end of the night, but there was something burning in you. The phone call from earlier had creeped its way back into your head. You didn’t want to ruin the mood, especially since Logan had dropped his arm from your waist, to grab your hand. You needed to ask though, because you knew if you didn’t and you never found out what it was about it’ll probably come back and haunt you later.

“Hey, Lo?” 

“Hm?” 

You stopped, and he stopped with you. You were standing on an empty street, one of the smaller neighborhoods of the town, not too far from yours. It was quiet, peaceful, one of the times you could really appreciate moving to this small town- all because of him. You purse your lips together, unsure how to tell him what happened. 

“Something wrong bub?” He asked, looking at your concerned face. He brought a hand to your chin, examining you as if he was trying to read your mind. 

“Something weird happened, before you came to pick me up.” You begin. “I got a phone call from an old colleague, someone who was in Vietnam. Doctor Frank Jones. Do you know him?”

Logans brows creased, and shook his head. “Not familiar with any doctors. Just you.” He smiled. You nodded, eyes darting away from him, feeling regretful now that you even brought it up. 

“Well he knew you.” You say. “Or…I don’t know maybe he doesn’t…” 

His smile dropped and he stepped closer, dropping his hand from your chin. “What did he say?” 

“He said he knew that we were hanging out, together I guess. He…Told me to be careful. Around you. Then he hung up.” 

Logan frowned, his brows creasing together. You saw his jaw tense up, as he looked up from you, looking around the empty neighborhood. 

“Do you know why he would say that?” You asked softly. Logan looked back at you.

For a moment, he looked angry his lips pulled tight as his eyes narrowed- but then his expression softened, and he looked just plain upset. “I….” He swallowed. “I’m not fully sure. I suppose I can guess though.” 

“You can..guess?” You asked. 

“Look…I…If he was in Vietnam then maybe he knew about me. About the team I was apart of.” He says. “I didn’t want to tell you this. I…I didn’t want you to look at me differently. To be scared of me.” 

“Lo.” You put a hand on his chest. “I could never be scared of you. You being secretive from me though…That scares me.” 

He brought his hand to yours, squeezing it gently, before pulling it away. “After you left, me and Victor got into some trouble. He went after some girl in one of those villages. He got stopped by the commanding officer- not the one you knew, we had a new guy come in. Victor killed him.”

You gasped. “What- are you serious?” 

“It gets worse.” He says. Guilt flashed across his face. “I…Tried to defend him. He was my brother, the only family I got. We’d been serving together for years and I just- thought it’s what I needed to do but… They sentenced us with a death squad. Well, you can guess what happened.” 

You stared at Logan with wide eyes, unbelieving of what he was telling you. He never said anything once, about any of this happening in the letters you communicated back and forth and that…hurt you more than anything. You knew Victor was a bit of a wild card, the man hit on you more times than you care to remember- Logan usually coming to your rescue for that. For him to do something to hurt someone innocent- and then to kill a commanding officer? You didn’t know what to think, as you looked back up at Logan. 

He was clearly struggling as he talked about this. Now you knew why he never wanted to talk about it, why he went silent- with the look in his eyes like he was seeing ghosts. It wasn’t just Vietnam that happened, but that. He opened his mouth, taking in a breath as he spoke his next sentence.

“Obviously it means that they figured out we were mutants, and couldn’t die.” He continues. “We got approached by this man, some kind scientist in the military. He was working on this project- and figured that me and Victor were perfect. He saw our strength, our- mutation. Thought it would be helpful.”

“The operative team you were on.” You say. He nodded. 

“Team X. At first it was just stuff around Vietnam, then we branched out to other countries. Just classified missions, breaking into communist parties, getting intel- sometimes we’d take out a few bad guys but then it just got worse and worse and…The team was becoming brutal. The things they were doing. I couldn’t do it.”  

You reached for his hand, and he looked down at where you were holding him. Then he looked back up at you.

“I thought maybe I was doing something good.” He says quietly. “Helping the country, ending wars. I hadn’t known anything other than violence until you showed up. You made me want to be better and…I just became worse.” 

“Lo-” You stepped closer. “No- No, it’s….” You searched for your words. “You’re not a bad man Lo. You just…Got dealt bad cards. You left, you knew these things were wrong. That’s important. You keep going everyday trying to be better and do better- I know you do, I see it.” 

“That doctor, whoever called you. I didn’t know him. He was right though. You should be careful.” He says gently. “I wondered if I should have even come back when I left the team. I knew you were here, that you had been waiting for me and I didn’t want to disappoint you.” 

“I’m not scared of you Lo.” You say softly. “I know you would never hurt me.” 

“I came back for you.” He says softly. You looked into his eyes, and he looked away, shame on his face- as you brought your hand up to cup his cheek. You leaned forward, softly pressing your lips against his. You gave him room to pull away, but he returned the kiss back. 

Despite everything he just told you, you couldn’t bring yourself to be angry- not at him for not telling you anything, and not for the things he told you he committed. You knew it was something he had been clearly carrying around, a deep guilt he held inside himself- guilt being an emotion that you knew yourself all too well, a feeling that any soldier feels when they come home and you weren’t even a soldier. Guilt may have been his cross to bear, even if his intentions were good, honorable even- and it led to bad things. You knew that it was going to take time, for him to work through this and while you couldn’t heal him or fix him, you could support him- hold his hand and push him to keep going. It was just yet another casualty of war, a man, led to believe he was doing the right thing- only to realize it was all the wrong thing after all. 

You had spent years wondering about your own actions, you wanted to help people, that’s why you signed up. Though you wondered; did you just become another number, another reason for the fighting to keep going? Did your participation support the violence when all you wanted to do was stop it?

There was only thing you knew. It was all in the past. 

The war had been over for 2 years. 

It was time to move on. You didn’t know how you deal with the moral dilemma of knowing the things you done, how do you make up for it? 

You did know that you were glad that you and Logan both made it. Standing there tonight. Perhaps it wasn’t the most romantic conversation- but as Logan pressed his lips to yours, eager and almost demanding, his hands grabbing your hips and pushing you against him- you could feel it. The relief he felt as if he just admitted his sins to his god. You knew Logan Howlett was a good man, that all he wanted to be was a good man. 

Maybe that’s all that was important in the end. 

You parted from you kiss, lost for words- and your breath, and he leaned his forehead against yours. 

“I’m sorry.” He says, his grip on your hips tight, as if he was afraid to let go.

“You should be.” You say. “That kiss was overdue.” He let out a small laugh, knowing that it’s not what he meant- but he could be sorry for that too. You brought your hands up to cup his face, your fingers softly scratching at his beard, making his eyes flutter shut. “We’ll work through this. Okay?” You say softly. “You don’t have to bear this alone anymore.” 

“I don’t deserve you.” He mutters softly.  

“On the contrary, I been waiting for this for awhile. You owe me.” 

He smirked. “That so?”

“Mhm.” 

“I’ll make it up to you.” He says softly, pulling you closer against him. You wanted to kiss him again, but you could tell what he really needed, was a hug. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, leaning into him- hugging him tightly, and he responded with the same, burying his face into your neck. 

You’ll be alright.

[lostintransist]

Fallen Angel | Cat Distribution System

Part 1 | AO3 | *This is a story told in scenes and can be read in any order though is listed in chronological order on the masterlist.

A jaw-cracking yawn split your face. You were lying on the couch in the living room waiting for the sun to rise. It had been a late night at work. You had to stay later than normal for the scheduled deep cleaning. The clock showed 6:27 when you rolled to a stop outside the house you shared with the guys.

You had scheduled yourself off tonight, knowing you would need the time to recover. Today’s goal would be to stay awake for as long as possible. Scrolling through your apps, eyes bleary you hear a sound from further in the house that you aren’t familiar with. Sitting up you find a fresh-faced bleach blonde clicking down the hall in clubbing heels.

Vaguely you remember Kyle mentioning that he would be going out with some friends last night.

“Oh!” The blonde stops short at seeing you. Probably the bags under your eyes making you look like a zombie.

Curiosity satisfied, you shift to lay back down.

“When Kyle mentioned he was in a polyamorous relationship I didn’t realize that included with a,” her lip curled up and away from her teeth as she bit into the word like a rotten peach, “woman.”

Did this bitch just…?

“And when Kyle mentioned he was going out to get his dick wet he didn’t mention it would include dragging a mannequin home.” You glare up at her from the back of the couch.

Johnny appears from the kitchen, muscles on full display as he scratches at his chest under his sleeveless workout shirt. Blondie’s gaze raked up and down Johnny’s form appreciatively.

Now you weren’t a jealous person but if you could hurl yourself over the furniture before Johnny caught you would have thrown her out of the house yourself.

“How copy?”

Bless that man and his instant understanding of the tension in the air like nitroglycerin on a bumpy road. He crossed the room and settled in behind you on the couch, placing a kiss on your head.

“Fine. The trash was just taking itself out.”

The blonde’s mouth popped open as she gaped at you.

“No one likes day-old fish, now out,” you flick your fingers to the door.

She stamps her foot and makes a noise of shock.

“How did someone like you,” nasty emphasis on the word you, “End up dating men like him and Kyle?”

Johnny tensed, ready to fight your battles.

“You ever hear of the cat distribution system? Well, sometimes it assigns things other than cats, like me. I got assigned to five of the hottest military men in the county and you?” Dragging your eyes from her toes peeping through with chipped polish to the dark roots coming through on the top of her head, “Wouldn’t get picked even as the last bitch at the shelter.”

With no good rebuttal to that, because there really wasn’t one, the blonde saw herself off and slammed the door behind her.

Turning you find Johnny, slack-jawed staring at you.

“What?” You ask him, concerned.

“I didn’t know you had it in you bonnie.”

“To be a bitch? Course I can. I also haven’t slept in rolling up on twenty-four hours so that doesn’t help.”

He pops both hands onto your cheeks and gives you a kiss that leaves you blinking back into reality by the time it is done.

“Do you have a degradation kink I didn’t know about Johnny?”

“Yes.” This reply comes from Kyle.

He looks no worse for wear after his night with the bitch you threw out. He looked remarkably put together for someone who had a nighttime visitor actually, with hair laid down nice, a maroon shirt, and dark wash jeans.

“Ah fuck off Garrick!” Johnny snapped.

“Where did your last girlfriend go, Kyle? I really liked her!” You whine as you lean back into Johnny.

“France.”

“Well, can’t you convince her to come back and join the polyq? I’d happily sleep with her. Your one-night stands are not nice to me.”

Johnny tugged on your earlobe.

“I’ve got dibs next bonnie.”

“I know you do. All I’m saying is I don’t think I’d need to be ovulating to let her peg me.”

Kyle barked out a laugh as Johnny dropped a smiling kiss to the top of your head.

Johnny murmured his love for you into your hair. Kyle crossed the room to drop a kiss on your lips.

“I love you, sweet girl. I’ll reach out and let her know you’re interested.”

“You don’t need to do that but at least stop bringing home dates that don’t believe you’re polyamorous maybe?”

Johnny piped up here, “Yeah Kyle, maybe you should start kissing any of us before you leave with a girl.”

“You just want more kisses, Johnny,” Kyle teased him.

“Fuck right I do,” he leaned forward.

You can’t help but smile as you watch Kyle and Johnny kiss. They love each other, and they love you, and you love them. This house held so much love you swore it had to have settled into the walls.

Gary appears, rubbing sleep from his eyes. He glances over the kissing men and your relaxing position on Johnny. The weight of his body settling on yours, head resting on your collarbone as his arms wrap around you makes the moment that much sweeter.

You drop a kiss to his forehead, “Morning Gary.”

You get a grumble of sound as a reply.

Movement draws your face back to Kyle.

“I’ve got some errands to run this morning. Can I get a kiss for the road?” His plush lips are quirked in a small smile.

“Of course!” You chirp, the hand closest to him lifting to his face while the other stays resting on Gary’s back.

Kyle leans forward, the hand he uses for balance sliding under the neck of Gary’s shirt.

His kisses taste faintly of Johnny and Gary’s sighs against your body tell you he was appreciating the contact as well.

When Kyle pulls back from the kiss he drops one to your forehead, one to Gary’s hair, and finally one to Johnny before heading for the door.

“So you missed it, Gary, apparently our girl here is interested in getting pegged,” Johnny sits up a bit to lean around and look at Gary.

You slap at Johnny’s thigh.

“You quit that. I said I was interested in getting pegged by Kyle’s last girlfriend, not that I was interested in getting pegged in general.”

Gary pushes up on his hands to stare at you. Unable to bear the interested confusion in his gaze you cover his face with your hands.

“All of you need to stop being mean to me!” But you can’t help but laugh even as you say it.

Masterlist | Fallen Angel Masterlist

@lilynotdilly

[laseracronym]

NSFW Alphabet (Aizawa Shouta)

(NSFW obviously, Demi/Ace-Spectrum!Aizawa, fem!Reader, chubby!Reader)

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Sleepy (no surprise there) and cuddly, very soft. He'll help you clean up, get you anything you may need in that moment, and then he'll pull you into his arms and close his eyes. His voice is a groggy murmur, speaking with you in his half-asleep state, not bothered if you want to talk for a while, but not exactly trying to stay up for it, either.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He likes to watch his hands press into your soft flesh, the way you look so delicate against his scarred body. He likes to brush his stubbled jaw along your tender neck, the lightest of shivers he gets from you after doing that.

He favors your waist, which he likes to grab and give a soft squeeze while passing you in the house. He likes your thighs, how they clench around his head as he goes down on you, like you need him there. He likes your upper arms, running the back of his knuckles up and down them as you spare a few moments to talk in the morning. Your body is so soft, it's precious, decadent, he's in awe that he's allowed to touch you.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He likes cumming inside of you. It hits on some sort of primal need in him that he's never experienced with a previous partner. Just you.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Midnight made a joke that you should try wearing cat ears in the bedroom and Shouta hasn't stopped thinking about it.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He has experience, enough to know what he's doing and what he likes. But he's found with you he has a bigger sexual appetite and he's found out even more about himself than he has with previous partners. He's greatly expanded his knowledge.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He likes positions where he can see your face and watch your expressions, where he can crowd in close to you and be flush up against you.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Not necessarily either. He's soft with you, more open, he's not so stoic that there's no room for laughter in the bedroom.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He doesn't really trim any of his body hair, down below included, if it really bothers you, he'll probably do some basic maintenance.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He's all about the intimacy when it comes to sex with you. Before you, sex was scratching an itch, with you, sex is another expression of his feelings for you.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Occasionally jerks off in the shower if he feels the need, very disinterested about it. He's gotten into mutual masturbation with you, he loves watching you play with yourself, the way you react to him watching you.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Body worship. He could spend hours appreciating your body if he could, running his hands over your soft curves, pressing kisses to your sensitive skin. He also loves eating pussy, your pussy specifically. All of his most intense desires revolve around you.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

The bedroom or the living room couch, because the post-sex nap spot is right there and ready to go.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You do. Sometimes you'll do the most innocuous thing and it'll just cause desire to bloom in him. If you look to him, express your want for him, your need, he reacts instantly.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He's not a fan of pain play, especially inflicting the pain. He might be willing to try bondage with you but he refuses to bring the capture weapon into the bedroom. It's a tool for his job, and he doesn't want to bring that into his intimate life.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He loves giving oral, he could spend the rest of his life buried between your thighs. There's nothing more intimate and satisfying than giving you pleasure in this way and he's made sure over the course of your relationship that he's damn good at it. Honestly, he doesn't even need to be reciprocated, this could be the extent of your activities for the night and he'd be a happy man.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

It varies, he's very much willing to go at your desired pace. He gets a lot out of the pleasure he gives you, so if you want faster, slower etc that works for him as well.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He doesn't prefer them, he likes taking his time.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He's open to new ideas but slow to voice his own curiosities. He can take risks if properly motivated.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Shouta's pretty much a one and done kind of guy, but he makes it last. He spends a lot of time on foreplay and he's pretty good at holding off on his own orgasm. He makes sure that you're satisfied.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He doesn't have any toys for himself but he likes to use toys on you and he likes watching you use toys on yourself. He likes getting you new toys and helping you shop for them, and helping you test them out, of course.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He can get in a teasing mood sometimes, but he caves so easily when you whine and beg.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Not too loud, lots of rumbling groans and cut off swears. He checks in with you a lot, wanting to know how you feel, what you need.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He's somewhere on the ace spectrum, maybe demi. He's desperately attracted to you, and it's because it's you. He'd never thought much of the curve of a person's waist, but the curve of your waist will often catch his attention. He doesn't really question it, he doesn't spend a lot of time pondering labels. He's happy with you and that's what's important.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He's got a thick cock of average length, not much of a grower, what you see is what you get. He's got a lot of body hair, you'd think he has some sort of werewolf quirk, and a littering of scars all over from his dangerous job. Rugged. He's muscular, of course, after all the training, but he's got a little bit of softness to him still. He's not strict with his diet and his exercise isn't to achieve a particular form.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He's got a moderate sex drive, but even on nights where he's not in the mood to receive pleasure, he can readily be spurred in the mood to give it.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Very quickly, and eagerly. It's one of his favorite parts of the whole ordeal.

(Let me know if you want to see me do this or the SFW Alphabet for other MHA characters. Feel free to drop me an ask for headcanons or drabbles.)

[pigeonwhumps]

Bruises

Everything taglist: @painful-pooch @i-eat-worlds @a-funeral-romance @rainydaywhump

Whumpuary day 21: bruises | "who are you?" | immortality

After being isolated and treated as a punching bag for far too long, Whumpee runs to the only place they hope they might be able to find safety.

1.7k

CWs: bruises, isolation, team whump, arguments, used as a punching bag, abuse, touch-starved

Whumpee knocks on the small metal door weakly, hand dropping to their side after three small knocks. They stand as upright as possible, hand on the wall to help, arm trembling under the weight, and hope it's enough.

The door opens after what feels like both a minute and an eternity, and Caretaker's there, seemingly unchanged after all this time in her ink-covered dungarees, hair braided and pulled back. She blinks at them, at their bruises and blood, at the patched drawstring bag over one shoulder and their scruffy, dirty clothes and shoes. They blink back, almost too tired to be embarrassed. Almost. How much of a mess must they look in her eyes?

"Whumpee?"

"You said once," they croak, "that if I needed someplace to crash then I could, no questions asked. Does that offer still stand?"

A million emotions flash through Caretaker's eyes at once, and Whumpee can't hope to make out what they are. Then she nods and steps aside.

"Honestly I was more thinking at home, it's more comfortable there, but sure. I have an armchair and snacks. Come on in."

Whumpee ducks their head and limps inside. They'd be happy naked on a cold metal floor so long as Whumper's not there. And she's not, would never be, because the whole reason Caretaker made the offer in the first place was because she didn't trust Whumper, didn't like her. It was why they fought.

She has every reason to say 'I told you so' and probably just as many ways to realise that, but she's not.

Caretaker's studio is nice. The old warehouse it's a part of isn't disguised entirely, old pipes and brickwork visible. Her rented space contains a sewing machine, cutting mat, screen printing press, inks and fabrics and threads of all colours and types, everything Whumpee would expect to see here, had they ever bothered to visit. They clutch the corded handle of their bag tightly. It's their most treasured possession, and this is where it's from.

Caretaker waves a hand in the direction of the armchair. "Get comfy. There's the sink if you need it, and the toilet's at the end of the hall. I'll be back in a few minutes."

Whumpee nods gratefully, waiting until Caretaker's left again before cleaning their hands and face, changing into fleecy pyjamas and curling up on the armchair, Teddy in hand. They avoid looking at themself while they do all of this, their appearance not something they want to dwell on. They must be making the furniture dirty, surely, but Caretaker told them to sit so she can't mind too much.

That makes a change. A change from being somewhere where they apparently matter less than everyone else, everything else, where they're so easy to dismiss that–

They swallow a sob, swallow it right down, keeping their emotions clenched tight inside. Caretaker doesn't need to see this, especially not when it's all their own stupid, naïve fault. Can't see what's right in front of their face sometimes, she said, and she was right. The bruises and cuts all down one side of their body from the last time they were dragged across the floor are proof of that. Fucking hell.

They close their eyes.

Next thing they know, someone's shaking their shoulder, setting their body throbbing. They snap their eyes open as Caretaker's hand withdraws.

Ow.

"Sorry. You still sleep like the dead. You also look like hell, so I've brought you a cup of tea, a pot noodle and some biscuits. Relax. You don't have to tell me what happened, I meant that, but I have some plasters and stuff if you need them?" Whumpee shakes their head. They're not going to use everything of Caretaker's when they can't even replace it, this is already way too much. "Okay. Well, drink, eat, sleep, whatever you need to do. I'll– I'll be here. This time. Okay?"

"It wasn't your fault last time," Whumpee whispers. They'd walked out on Caretaker, not the other way round.

Caretaker hums non-committally, in that way that means she disagrees but doesn't want to risk starting an argument, and Whumpee sighs, sipping at their tea with shaking hands. Chamomile, their favourite. They don't want an argument either. Everything has already hurt more than enough recently.

They eat half of the pot noodle without taking a breath. Then they force themself to put it down and look up at Caretaker, who has a concerned frown on her face as she works, sketching in her book.

"You were right. She was awful."

Caretaker looks up. "Whumper?"

Whumpee nods. All those awful things they'd yelled at Caretaker, because they were stupid and starstruck and couldn't see what was right in front of them. And they can't even excuse any of it, because she was right, entirely right, and she's just let them right back in like the last thing they saw wasn't her looking so completely crestfallen.

"I'm sorry, Caretaker. I was horrible to you and you just... you're too good." Too good for them, too good for this world.

She smiles bitterly. "I wasn't entirely innocent in that fight. You always act like I'm either one or the other. That fight was awful, on both sides, but we're here now. Water under the bridge. Okay?"

"Okay."

"For the record, I did hope I was wrong."

Whumpee nods and dives into the remainder of their pot noodle. Better eat now, while they can. Caretaker goes back to drawing at her standing desk.

After a while, they take a sip of their tea. "It was okay at first. Good, even. She was my mentor. I did what she said, I learned, I got to socialise with her and the rest of her team. I helped. It felt good. But then she... I don't know when it started but..."

They trail off. They don't know when Whumper started using her as a punching bag. It wasn't immediately, but then the tasks got harder and the punishments got harsher and Whumper got angrier and they were isolated and then there they were, a convenient punching bag and... other things. Worse things.

"I couldn't tell. Who would I tell? How would I tell? She threatened me. Threatened you. But I– I– it hurt so much, Caretaker."

"She's the one who left you like this?"

Whumpee nods. It's not the worst they've been, but they don't say that, not trying to garner unmerited sympathy from Caretaker. It's their own fault.

"I'm glad you got out of there."

"She's not the reason it hurt so much."

Caretaker cocks her head in concern. "Her team?"

Whumpee nods. Stops to take a long drink and sinks into their seat, wrapping their arms around themself. This is a lot to think about.

They don't know why they're talking, but they are, and that means thinking about it. About what happened, about everything. And that hurts. It's embarrassing, too, they should've guessed. Caretaker did.

They thought the team was just oblivious. Now they're not so sure.

"My first complaint... it didn't... I made everything worse even when I chickened out. Whumper knew I was going to, even though I didn't. And then I tried again through proper channels and it... Team Leader... he already knew. He asked me to... I showed him! And I got suspended when I wouldn't withdraw it. And Whumper... she... I was stupid, I stayed, I thought I could survive it, I thought I'd be fine but she... and now I'm just a coward. What if she hurts someone else? Or if she makes good on her threat against you? I thought she couldn't but..."

Caretaker stares for a moment and then grins cockily. "Come on Whumpee, you know what I used to do for a living, I'll be fine."

"Don't. Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Stop acting like it's all fine. It's not, and you don't know that it'll be okay! This isn't an assassination and even if it was you remember how we met! Stop trying to– to– stop lying to me!"

Whumpee takes a deep breath, trying to calm themself. They're not being fair, they know that. She's trying to help. They just– how can she pretend it's all okay when it's so very not?

"Sorry."

Caretaker shakes her head. "I'm sorry. Maybe I'm being a bit flippant. But I will be okay. I'll make sure of it, I promise."

"You'd better."

Whumpee shifts, wincing. Curling up so tight hurts, tugging and pushing at the bruises and burns and cuts, but it's safer. No way to kick your chest in if they can't get to it.

"Are you sure you don't at least want painkillers?"

They shake their head. No drugs. No forced weakness and compliance. No weird hallucinations. No... god knows what. Not today.

"Okay. Try to sleep. If I'm not here when you wake don't panic, I just need to sort some things."

Despite the matter-of-fact soothing layered on top, Whumpee knows that tone of voice, all impending action. And they know what she's planning to do. They look Caretaker directly in the eyes.

"Don't do something you'll regret, Caretaker."

She looks taken aback for a moment at their sudden fierceness but then gives a toothy grin, like a predator that's scented blood.

"Oh, who says I'd regret it?"

"I mean just don't– don't get yourself hurt. She's dangerous."

"I know that. So am I." She must see something in Whumpee's bruised and battered face because she softens, tucking her pencil behind her ear and crossing the room to crouch in front of them. Broadcasting her every move, she presses a soft kiss to their forehead. "It was my job for thirty years. It's just a relief to find someone that I'm happy to use my skills on."

Caretaker rests her hands on their upper arms and they lean into the touch, despite the pain at the pressure. Tears prick at their eyes. This warm closeness without malicious intent... it's been too long.

"If you get yourself captured or killed I will bring you back from the depths of Hell and skin you alive for doing that to me. So don't. Is that clear?"

"Yes, sir." Whumpee glares half-heartedly. "I promise."

[widowshill]

— And do you or do you not have difficulty remembering such simple instructions? — Only during thunderstorms, sir.

THE SOUND OF MUSIC (1965) / DARK SHADOWS (1966)

[ennabear]

finished melvika now it’s time to write some heartbreaking angst 100k words no happy ending

[ghostzzy]

every day i post about how i don't want to work. well. today,

[cryolyst]

~

[bibleofficial]

i’ve been using those toe spacers for my tailors bunions & it’s like damn …. yall rly just walk like this ??