#also! there’s this word we obviously borrowed from german and we use it for small objects which we don’t really know the name for

[colourmeblood]

From the ask game :

7. three words from your native language that you like the most?

May I add and why? (Loving how they sound is a perfectly acceptable answer)

Three different words came to my mind and they are definitely among my faves from my native language. Please keep in mind they’re not useful though 😅

1. Nietoperz (a bat) - aside from the fact I tend to be, well, batshit crazy about bats, this word actually comes from old Slavic for “night flyer”. I totally understand it why for example French or German include the word “mouse” in their words for “bat”, but I do find “night flyer” both more badass and cuter, if that makes sense

2. Kombinować (to think of solution/to make your way through something/ to come up with a smart solution) - translations are a veeery big stretch here ‘cause there is no exact or precise word in other language, really. This word can also mean that you come up with a solution that is smart but not always safe or fair 😂

3. Dziabąg (it can mean any small/weird/unidentified creature, I use it synonymously as “little devil” and for example I’ve called my cat like this on multiple occasions)

[yoimeta]

Hi everyone! I noticed recently that the "KAZAKHSTAN 101 OR HOW TO OTABEK" post seems to have been taken off of tumblr? The author's whole blog seems to have been wiped. Do you know if this is archived anywhere? Is there a mirror, say, on Ao3?

Hello!

Thankfully, I managed to find what I believe is the original post. Here it is! The post is archived in plain text under the cut.

Hope this helps!

- Ji

Source: @sawyer-aik

KAZAKHSTAN 101 OR HOW TO OTABEK

THERE YOU GO YURI ON ICE FANDOM.

Disclaimer: this is in no way a fully comprehensive guide. This is just me trying to put together basics for people who are unfamiliar with Kazakhstan/Kazakhs to start their writing/research.

I am an ethnic Kazakh female, citizen of Kazakhstan, Almaty, bisexual, upper middle class, currently in college in the US. My experience is in no way representative of all kazakhs and Kazakhstan citizens. However, I think it’s pretty close to Otabek’s.

This is really, really long and kinda convoluted, but if you can bear it –– welcome!

Name: Many people have talked about Otabek’s name. This is how you shorten it –– “Bek”, “Beka”, or “Beks” if you wanna be really familiar and laid back.

Kazakhs don’t have middle names, we have patronymics. They are formed like this: the father’s name + ‘uly’ if the child is a boy or ‘kyzy’ is the child is a girl. For example, Otabek’s childrens’ patronymics would be Otabekuly and Otabekkyzy.

About Almaty and almatinians: Ok I’m so happy Otabek is from Almaty, I really don’t know much about life in other cities or rural areas. Almatinians rarely do. Comparing Almaty lifestyle to the rest of Kazakhstan is the same as comparing NYC to the rest of America –– it’s not representative of the quality of life in the country, like, at all.

Almaty has 2.5+ million population, and it grows every year. It’s a cultural and economic centre of the country. Apples originate from Almaty (!!!), hence the name from “Alma” –– apple. Almatinians are usually stereotyped as fast, brash and snobby –– kinda like New Yorkers, right? Almaty is much more tolerant and progressive, and also more ‘Western’ than the rest of the country in terms of mindset. Almatinians kinda look down on non-Almatinians, and really dislike the capital Astana because of all the funding and attention it gets.

Almaty has a great ethnic diversity –– main groups are Kazakhs, Russians, Uygur, Koreans, Germans, Jews, Uzbek, and many more. Though stereotypical jokes are generally acceptable, outright hate and discrimination against an ethnic group is not tolerated. Many foreigners visit here for business –– mostly Americans, Western Europeans and Chinese.

Almatinians love: coffeeshops, mall sales, cool cars (Hello Otabek’s motorcycle), smoking hukkah and vaping. They are usually concerned with status and try to show off their wealth. You can see people of all kind of different style and background in Almaty, fashion shows are held there, contemporary art and indie-music congregates there, along with all kinds of fancy ass crowd. It is a really interesting and kinda exhausting scene, especially if you are young and wanna have fun.

Language, culture, food, etc.

As an Almatinian Kazakh, Otabek is definitely fluent in both Russian and Kazakh, and probably has a very good grasp on English. He is a master of shala kazakh. Shala kazakh is a magic language that only city Kazakhs are privy to. It’s basically a wild mix of kazakh, russian and some fashionable english slang thrown in there. It’s usual for me to start a conversation with “OMG bro” and then kinda pull my speech together, substituting kazakh and russian words with each other and pepper it with “cool”, “ok” and other english exclamations. It’s not grammatically correct and is kinda lowbrow, but we all do it. Yes, even our parents. This is how Otabek sounds when he is talking to someone from home. Terrifying.

Nuclear family: City Kazakhs usually have two or three kids. That’s less than people have in rural areas. Children are important in Kazakh culture because they carry the family’s bloodline and history, especially boys. If you headcanon Otabek as having brothers and sisters, you are probably right! His family should be at least sort of wealthy to afford all the expenses of having a professional athlete for a child. Otabek has an expensive bike and his clothes look high-end –– he is definitely not poor.

Family in general. Kazakhs are close, VERY CLOSE to their family. Mind you, family is not just parents and siblings but also your grandparents, aunts and uncles and like all 173 cousins and nieces and nephews. Everyone is ridiculously involved in your life, always there with advice and complaints. You stay connected to your parents when you move out, when you get married, when you have kids, when you DIE. When Otabek misses the weekly skype dates or check-in phone calls, HE IS SHAMED SO HARD. Do you know grandma is worried about you, think about how old she is! Otabek’s relatives brag about his achievements like they moved him up the career ladder personally, with their own two hands. There’s nothing Otabek can really do about it tho he gets annoyed

Food: city Kazakhs have a very diverse cuisine. Traditional kazakh food is like 50% batter and 50% meat and takes long ass time to prepare so we reserve it for the holidays. My family loves fish, russian dishes such as borsht and blini, Uzbek lagman, Korean kimchi tho we try to avoid pork. And it’s not like we choose one day as a “Russian cuisine day”, we just kinda??? Deside to have some borsht today?? Almaty has lots of different restaurants, almatinians love sushi, pizza and pasta, shashlyk, all kinds of experimental foods and trying new things. Kumys –– mare’s milk –– is one of the things you should try in Kazakhstan as a turist, but I know many kazakhs who have never had it or don’t like it. They say it’s really good for you tho.

Holidays: ethnic Kazakhs in Kazakhstan celebrate: birthdays, New Years, Eid al-Adha which we call Kurban Bairam, Independence Day on December 16th and Nauryz on March 22nd. Young people kinda have get togethers on Halloween because it’s fun and a reason to hang out. Nauryz is one of my faves, it’s a pagan holiday of coming of spring and new life. On Nauryz, Almaty is adorned with flowers, yurts and giant swings are set on the city square, people wear traditional clothing and dance and play and eat a lot. My family also ended up celebrating Eastern Orthdox Christmas and Easter because each year our Russian friends invite us to hang out and celebrate with them, lol.

LGBTQIA+

Main principle is “Don’t ask, don’t tell”. General conflict avoidance protocols are in place. I personally know like 3 LGBT friendly hubs/clubs in Almaty. Nobody explicitly says “gay clubs” but people just kinda know what and where those are. There are get togethers and meetings you can attend to meet people, you can hang out with your significant other in public, hug, hold hands and no one would probably say anything. Colleges and universities are generally safe places, many of my friends are out in their college and don’t face any trouble. PDA will be frowned upon, but all PDA is generally frowned upon in Kazakhstan, even hetero. Feminist and sex-positive initiatives try to educate the populace and break the status quo, and are doing really well but the government’s disposition is homophobic. If your family is religious or traditional, they probably wouldn’t go as far as disowning you, but will probably pressure and guilt-trip you. LGBT+ youth generally plan to move somewhere else or just not settle. All of this is Almaty situation tho. Being LGBT in rural area is much more dangerous.

THE BEST PART: VOCABULARY

Ok this is what I find to be the easiest way to explain Kazakh to English speakers: think Turkish but written in cyrillic, with words borrowed from Arabic and Russian.

Endearments:

zhanym, жаным: my soul. Zhanym is everything to a Kazakh. You can use it for your family, friends, SO, I called my laptop zhanym today. It can be flirty, it can be serious. If you need Otabek to be affectionate with someone, use zhanym.

ainalaiyn, айналайын: really hard to translate but something like my precious?? Usually used towards small kids, but also if a Kazakh finds something really cute.

altynym, my golden baby. I love this one for obvious reasons, lol, hi, Otabek.

Mahabbatym, махаббатым, my love +

Suiktim, сүйіктім. my love, my dear. Kinda old fashioned but really romantic. I can see Otabek using this, but he will be teased and called an old sap if he does.

Kazakh have a lot more endearments, but most of them are for children.

Basic interaction and exclamations:

Iya. Ия. Yes.

Zhok. Жоқ. No

Rakhmet. Рахмет. Thank you.

Keshir. Кешір. Sorry.

Salem, Сәлем. Hello. A familiar greeting.

Sau bol, Сау бол. Literally “Be well” but actually means goodbye. Pretty familiar too.

O Kudai, О Құдай/O Allah, О Алла! Oh my god, obviously. Used in all kinds of different situations.

Oibai, Ойбай! How does one explain oibai. When a friend jump scares you, when you receive bad news, when you check your bank account –– oibai!

Abai bol, Абай бол. Be careful, is what your mom tells you when you go out.

Expletives and Swear Words. Yeeaaah the juicy stuff.

Zhyndy, Жынды. Crazy. If someone is being stupid or inappropriate, you call them zhyndy. When you tell a dumb joke at the familty table, mom smacks you upside the head and hisses “Ooooi, zhyndy!” When Jean-Jaques is acting a fool and makes out with his reflection, Otabek rolls his eyes and mutters “Zhyndy”.

Akymak. Ақымақ. Idiot. When someone is just dumb and not worth your time.

Ittin balasy. Иттің баласы. Child of a dog. It can be as harmless as “you pup” and as offensive as “son of a bitch” depending on the situation.

Kotindy kys. Көтіңді қыс. Squeeze you ass. God I love this one. When someone being an obnoxious wannabe, tell them they should squeeze their ass and check themselves.

Jean-Jaques: I am gonna be the King of the Grand Prix!

Otabek: Kotindy kys.

Shygasyn ba?! Шығасың ба?! You wanna go bro?! Ohh, someone is gonna catch these Kazakh fists.

Sigil. Сігіл. Basically go fuck yourself.

Sheshen ahmy/Sheshen sigem. Шешең амы/Шешең сігем. Your mother’s c*nt/Imma fuck your mother. REALLY FUCKING OFFENSIVE. Say this to a Kazakh if you have a death wish.

——————————————————————————————-

AND THEEEEEEERE YOU GO.

Again, this is just the basics. Do more research and talk to as many Kazakhs and Kazakhstani people as you can. We are a different but usually an interesting bunch. Thanks for your attention, Sawyer out!

[picturesoitlasts]

books

 Rules: In a text post list ten books that have stayed with you in some way. Don’t take but a few minutes, and don’t think too hard - they don’t have to be the “right” or “great” works, just the ones that have touched you. Tag ten friends, including me, so I’ll see your list.

I was tagged by @genericpseudonyms - It’s always difficult for me to pick ten books only 

1. Atonement by Ian McEwan I love flawed characters and Briony Tallis is SO flawed. It’s about the power of a narrative - whether it being a daydream, being lost in thoughts, different people’s perspectives on one and the same event - and also the power of creation that comes with it. I like to reread it at different stages of my life to see how my own perception of the story changes. When I discovered it, I was 17, reread it at 20 and once again when I was 25 and writing an essay on it for university. I guess it’s time to pick it up again this year. 

2. The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera

Keeping that one from Gen’s list. I remember so much of the outer circumstances regarding it: I bought it at Shakespeare & Company in Vienna in the summer of 2014. It had been on my to-read-list for a while. I loved this odd combination of complexity and, well, lightness, both explored in thought. And I remember how I sat there, on my parents’ couch, reading it and thinking “it’s so tragic, why am I not crying?”. And then, at one point pretty much towards the end, it all hit me and I started sobbing uncontrollably. I remember my dad asking what was going on. Eventhough a wave of emotion had overcome me, I could not find words to describe my feelings or thoughts and all I muttered was “the dog just died”. 

3. Great Expectations by Charles Dickens

Great Expectations is my favourite amongst the classics. Obviously, there are many more to read, but I don’t think that there will ever be one as important to me as Great Expectations. I discovered it in 2012 when I took a seminar on Charles Dickens, whom I have a love-hate-relationship with. Great Expectations certainly is the best thing he’s ever written, it’s so different from all his other works. To me, it is so incredibly real. Pip is my all time favourite character in literature, he’s so deep, so flawed, he seems like a real person to me. And in his development I do find so much of my own.

4. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

The first one of the classics I ever read, at 15, at the library even. Soon afterwards, I bought both the German and the English version because I simply wanted to put it on my bookshelf. I don’t think 15 year-old me would believe me if I told her how much this book would pop up in her later academic life. 

5. Life After Life by Kate Atkinson 

I love me a good bildungsroman, the stories about personal development of a character, their growth, their education. Basically, I love to follow their life journeys. Life After Life focuses on Ursula’s life. Or rather: the plural thereof. Reincarnation, rebirth, whatever you want to call it, it’s carried out extraordinarily by Kate Atkinson. I love the subtle changes to the reborn Ursulas, I love the historic context, I love how Atkinson switches between English, German and a little French, seemingly without effort. The German title - usually German titles end up being super corny - is perfect: Die Unvollendete. That means the unfinished, the incomplete. And isn’t that what life is all about? No matter how many chances we get, will we ever be complete?

6. Wild by Cheryl Strayed

Did not expect much from it, got everything. I read it when I was living far away from home, abroad, for the first time. At that time, I was all alone. I had only just arrived in Vancouver, did not yet know a single person there. But I had created a rule for myself: don’t hide in your room. Since I’m a small-talk hating introvert, it’s not easy for me to meet new people. So what I did, was take my camera, my notebook, a pen and Wild and I would explore the city by myself, Éponine-style. While I sat there, the waves of the Pacific Ocean at my feet, reading this book, I learned how much - if we really want it - we can change ourselves. It’s hard, of course it is hard. It is probably the hardest thing a person can do. But while I sat there, reading these words, I felt encouraged. (Also: the film is okay, but the book is the real deal. I also liked the Gilmore Girls take on it.)

7. The Princess Diarist by Carrie Fisher

I read that very recently and it helped me so much. For some time now, I’ve been struggling with my own mental health in a way I hadn’t thought it could ever happen to me. I’m working on it and it’s already getting better, and it’s probably cheesy to say, but The Princess Diariest was vital in that development. Carrie’s openness, showing the whole world her vulnerability, sharing with us her most personal thoughts - it was simply so inspiring. Reading it, I had a pencil with all the time, underlining and borrowing her words for my own diary, letting it all sink in and use writing as a means to develop, sometimes to finish, thoughts, instead of letting them drive me crazy in mind.   

8. Der Trafikant by Robert Seethaler

A German one! Or, more accurately, an Austrian novel. How did I find out about Der Trafikant? Well, I’m kind of in the movie version. It will hit cinemas in late 2018, so if you want to see me in my pretty 1937 and 1938 outfits, you probably should watch it:) Acting as a Nazi sympathiser on camera, I obviously wanted to know if the story was worth doing that. The story is worth it and so much more. It is often promoted as a love story. I would say it is one. Love (unrequited love, though) is a vital part of it, but I’d say even more vital are friendship against all odds, and doing what is right, instinctively even, during a time when most people didn’t do anything. I found so much of myself in the young protagonist (always wanted to compare myself to a 17 year old boy), it’s scary. I am so happy I got to be a part of this film, obviously because it was awesome being on set and everything, but mostly because it introduced me to this gem of a story. English version is The Tobacconist if anyone wants to read it.

9. Alias Grace by Margaret Atwood

I love Margaret Atwood. So which story do I choose? I go with Alias Grace. Once again: thoughts! I love to look into the minds of characters. And Grace and Simon are simply awesome to look into. The way Atwood subtly explores power, violence, sexuality, intelligence, psychology - it’s just superb. I also very, very much recommend the Netflix adaptation.  

10. A Long Way Down by Nick Hornby

Read it as a teenager, keep rereading it at different stages in my life, just like I do with Atonement. When I talk about it to people they’re always like “oh, it’s the story about suicide”. No it’s not. It’s about life. Choosing life. All the reasons to live. That’s why I think this story is so beautiful. And Nick Hornby manages to make you laugh, even though he’s addressing very serious topics. People usually like to compare me to Maureen. As a teenager, I always liked to compare myself with Jess (the only teenager, of the four protagonists, obviously). During my last reread on New Year’s Eve (yep, that’s what I did) I finally gave in and now I openly admit that the person I can identify with most is JJ. Which is sad. Because I always thought, he’s quite depressing and whiny. But well, here I am. (I still think I’m not all that whiny.) I just hope that there won’t ever be a time I can relate to Martin.

There we go. That kind of ended up being longer than I expected. 

I tag: @astoryinred @tomorrowatdawn @littlebonnieparker @soldierofdemocracy @thephantomoflesmis @textsfromumbridge

[fayrinferno]

Okay, long time no Esca shitposting, right?

This time about the names of the characters. You know what name intrigued me the most? Goau. Because what kind of a name is that and why would you choose it? In Japanese it’s written just “Goou”. And after years it hit me a few days ago; it was probably meant to be a variation of

João. 

Which is Portuguese mutation of John. You know, Gaean and Portuguese and all that? I’m gonna go with that. So yeah. King John.  

More “shower thoughts” under the cut (I think we had a post about this already, but I cannot find it).

Actually, there is a whole category of those names in Esca, I mean, existing foreign names changed up a bit. One possible reason is how Japanese warps foreign words because of not having the necessary sounds to transcribe them exactly. But I like to think they kept the misspellings intentionally. Like GRRM and his Jon, Samwell, Brynden and so on. Well-known names changed slightly to make the universe more fantasy-like. Because you don’t really want those ordinary Johns there, you want your characters to be unique and memorable, you don’t really want to find their names on Facebook (or earlier, in the phone book).

Balgus

Obviously derived from Vargas. A Spanish/Portuguese surname.

Folken 

Well, that one is hard. Volken (pronounced the same way) means “the people” in Germanic languages and as such I suppose is a rare surname used both as Volken and Folken. Of course, variations of „Falcon“ and „Vulcan“ are also possible inspirations. Or it’s just made up, let’s not absolutely disregard this option.

Allen 

This one is pretty much clear. The possible meanings for this name include “handsome” and “noble”. Of course.

Celena

Serena, and „serene“ is also the meaning.

Merle

Well, it is an existing name, too, but I wonder about the choice a little. In original it’s „Meruru“. And what I found interesting are these repeating „R“ sounds the creators chose for catgirl characters. Naria and Eriya’s names were originally „Naru Naru“ and „Beru Beru“ (see the pattern?). I supose it would be transcribed as Nal-Nal and Bel-Bel then. There are even some instances in other anime, wonder about that, lol. Maybe it should be associated with the purring sound?

Van

Here, I would not be too sure with the knee-jerk Vaughn. Mostly because it sounds and is written differently in Japanese (”Baan”). Funny thing, Baan in Arabic is a girl’s name meaning „tall & slender“, literally after a type of tree. Or a Sikh boy‘s name meaning arrow/god’s hymns. But personally, I don’t  think either of these was intended, I mean, Google did not exist then. And „Vans“ are not uncommon in Japanese pop-culture, like the protagonist of Gun x Sword or FFXII. With a small variation, because they are both written like „Vaan“ (not „Baan“). And yet, none of them got transcribed as Vaughn either. I rather think this name was created rather than borrowed and the Japanese find it somehow cool-sounding or something...

Eries

... Which is similar to „Aria“ (Eries‘ middle name). Japanese just love the sound of that, apparently. Seriously. It’s a manga, an anime, a Japanese magazine, a Japanese singer, a Japanese company producing guitars and a couple of anime characters as well, of course. To be fair, it’s also the transcription of the name Aliyah or Alia, but I think where the Japanese first came from was probably just the musical aria. Eries itself is probably related to Elise/Alice.

Millerna

I think this one may come from “Milena”, a Slavic name meaning “beloved one” (it exists in my language as well but I think one of the reasons it’s not too popular - besides being kinda old-fashioned is it just sounds too similar to “female lover”). Mila Kunis was born with it, for example. Also, there was a Queen of Montenegro with the same name; you may find it interesting that she had given birth to nine daughters (and three sons).

Marlene

Actualy a blend of Mary and Magdalene. Did not know that.

Mahad & Chid

Mahad is an Arabic name, meaning „great“. Since they chose Arabic, I tried to find an Arabic name similar to Chid (or Shid, as it is written in original), and only found „Shahid“, „witness“ (he is more like “proof” though, haha).

Dornkirk

Only thing that comes to my mind is Dunkerque/Dunkirk. „Kirk“ is usually related to church, anyway.

Dilandau

Honestly, no idea. But this made me snort.

[samdukewieland]

Stuck Inside Media Diary Week 2

New week. New movies I had never seen before. Only one was on the DVR so now it’s just like a glorified streaming guide and for that I apologize. There were three movies this week that I had seen before, but I’ve decided, because rules are important, that I won’t re-watch a movie until I watch a new one. Does this matter? No. But it has made me realize that I might be exposing my ass in the upcoming weeks, because we all lie about saying we’ve seen some movies when we actually haven’t. Not the case for this week, but it’s impending.

Sunday, March 29

Warrior, O’Conner 2011 [as of now this is available on Amazon Prime]

As a person who doesn’t really care about MMA or UFC or boxing or bum fights or bare knuckle brawls I went in under the impression that there’d probably be some kind of barrier in my way of enjoying it, despite knowing its esteemed reputation for being man-weep canon. Any movie that opens and closes with a song by The National is fairly transparent about the type of movie its going to be, despite having an extremely yolked Tom Hardy as one of the main characters. My first cry came at a very unexpected moment, especially because Frank Grillo had a significant role in making that happen (though I will say, I had no idea Frank Grillo was in this movie and about midway through I thought “man, that guy kinda looks like Grillo, but he’s kinda small and has a fashion mullet”). However, I’m a cryer, so I don’t want to set the expectation of you will cry at this you piece of shit! but you might and it’ll come out of a good place, because this movie doesn’t trick you into crying by manipulating you into it (okay, it does at one point, but it involves Moby Dick, so again, it’s kinda unexpected). It opens with “Start A War” and ends with “About Today,” a top 5 sad boy song by The National and I’ll be damned if I didn’t listen to it once a day all last week.

Better Call Saul 

“Sunk Costs”, “Sabrosito”, “Chicanery”, “Off Brand”, “Expanses”

John Getz hive, assemble.

Monday, March 30

Working Girl, Nichols 1988 [as of now this is available on HBO]

Sometime in college, I think in a detective fiction class I took, we talked about knowing a reference to something before knowing what it’s either paying homage to or directly referencing. For example: the first time I read The Long Halloween (which is a Batman comic by Jeph Loeb) I had no idea that basically everything involving Falcone is just ripped from The Godfather, because I had never seen The Godfather at that time in my life; literally the first page of the book is “I believe in Gotham City.” Or in Django Unchained when they go to Mississippi and the title card moves across the screen just like it does in Gone With The Wind (Tarantino movies are generally just long homages and references to other things, so if you need another example, just look to really anything he’s ever worked on). There’s probably a German word for this feeling of recognition and I just don’t have the energy to look to see what it would be, but I felt it while watching Working Girl in two regards. 

The first was that I didn’t realize that School Of Rock is essentially just Working Girl and when you have a realization like this, you feel kinda dumb, because you just assume everyone figured this out before you did. The second was that Joe Swanberg has tried to model his movies after Mike Nichols ones like his life depended on it and he just can’t or rather hasn’t. Also I’m not a person who was alive in the 80s and I’m sure there’s some modern day equivalent (potentially her daughter) who I defend out of some weird sense of contrarian obligation, but what’s uh, what’s going on with Melanie Griffith and her as actor?

Better Call Saul 

“Slip”, “Fall”, “Lantern” [Season 3 finale]

BCS season 3 really stepped up to the heights of Breaking Bad and I think I might like it just a little bit better than it? I haven’t watched Breaking Bad in long time, I find it pretty difficult to re-watch (it’s very fire works factory for me) so I’m sure there are some BB highs that I just don’t remember fully, but that BCS can juggle being three different shows all at the same time and do it excellently really has me taken aback. It’s like watching the Coen Brothers jump from genre to genre and not be worried about the end result.

Tuesday, March 31

Say Anything..., Crowe 1989 [as of now this is available on Hulu]

I’m unabashedly in the can for Cameron Crowe, which is a semi-embarrassing thing to admit, but whatever. I saw Aloha in theatres and watched We Bought A Zoo when it was on FX once (in real time too, so that means with commercials-this was also the only time I’ve seen We Bought A Zoo, but I think I’d do it again); you can’t hurt me. I think I kept my distance from Say Anything... for so long, because it was one of those things that I’d be annoyed at because it’d resonate with me too much, because feeling that is kinda hacky and embarrassing, but if there’s one thing that Cameron Crowe movies put an emphasis on of importance on, it’s being sincere. And I sincerely loved it (hot, HOT take). Thanks to Russillo for recommending it on Simmons’ podcast last week.

Better Call Saul

“Smoke” [Season 4 premiere]

Wednesday, April 1

The Graduate, Nichols 1967 [as of now this is available on Amazon Prime]

Sucks that this movie has been used by a certain type of dude who use it as a blueprint for their life and how they view relationships. Other than that, good job everyone. [I definitely thought it would be clever to watch this after watching Say Anything... because I just assumed Ben Braddock walked so Lloyd Dobbler could run-I was kinda right, whatever]

Hot Rod, Schaffer 2007

While April Fools Day means nothing to me I do try to watch a comedy on the day, because...eh, why not. Hot Rod is maybe a perfect comedy and I think I could spend hours talking about it. I don’t know how there hasn’t been some kind of programming that’s been done around The Lonely Island and their catalog, because it seems very obvious. 

Hot Rod with Digital Shorts played before and after and then Wayne’s World

MacGruber and you play MacGruber shorts before and after and then whatever grotesque 80′s action movie you’d want, maybe Commando

Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping with Lonely Island music videos before and after and then This Is Spinal Tap

The Unauthorized Bash Brothers Experience sing-a-long followed by The Lonely Island pilot and  either a collection or the entirety of I Think You Should Leave

maybe this is all a lead-up to Palm Springs, a movie I have’t seen and know very little about other than they produced it and Samberg is in it

Thursday, April 2

The In-Laws, Hiller 1979

I wrote it as my letterboxd. “review” , but this thing’s 1979 funny until they go to South America and then it is actually funny. Falk is just gangbusters.

Better Call Saul 

“Breathe”, “Something Beautiful”

Friday, April 3

You Can Count On Me, Lonergan 2000 [as of now this is available on Amazon Prime]

I say this as a very big fan of his, but! Timothée Chalamet, consider yerself on notice for borrowing heavily from the Mark Ruffalo school of acting. Also, I get it now with Laura Linney, who I’ve liked before, but thought she might kind of be overrated by some people. Also, Matthew Broderick made this after Election (and also Inspector Gadget), so quite the infidelity streak for Brody, probably not a double feature.

Better Call Saul

“Talk”, “Quite A Ride”, “Piñata”

Saturday, April 4

De Palma, Baumbach & Paltrow, 2015 [as of now this is available on Netflix]

The definitive documentaries for the directors of this friend group are basically perfect in their own ways. That this is just De Palma talking about himself and his career and movies, sometimes being incredibly critical of his own work and others. He seems pretty self-aware, probably the most of that group of directors, while still coming across as incredibly cocky. De Palma is perfect for Brian De Palma. However, if anyone wanted to make a 10 hour documentary on Scorsese, Spielberg, Coppola, De Palma and Lucas in this style or it’s just the 5 of them interviewing each other moderated by like Fincher or someone, man....I could really go for that. (I mean if Michael Jordan can get one, why not these guys?)

The Other Director Documentaries

Spielberg, 2017 (HBO) [Interviews and retrospectives about Spielberg’s career, with personal highlights. It’s essentially Spielberg in a nutshell: big, flashy with a lot of time on particular moments that are more important to him than they are to you]

Empire Of Dreams, 2004 (Disney+) [Ostensively this is about Star Wars, and it’s made by a company-man, it says so much about Lucas, a man who hated how institutions told him what he could do so he unintentionally created one that has copied what he hates]

Heart Of Darkness: A Filmmaker’s Apocalypse, 1991 [A truly wild ride, tells you everything you need to know about Coppola]

Italianamerican, 1974 [While a new documentary about Scorsese is probably what I covet most, he’s a pretty open book about his controversies and he’d probably enjoy talking about other people’s work more than his own-catholicism’s a helluva thing]

The Godfather Pt. I & The Godfather Pt. II, Coppola 1972 & 1974

I don’t know if I necessarily endorse watching both of these back-to-back; I guess I’m glad I did it, even if the motivation was mainly to just see if I could. Obviously these movies are important and good and are about so much more than just gangsters and thugs, but a lot of the time it just feels like eating vegetables for me. I did not grow up in a household that emphasized the importance of The Godfather so maybe that’s part of it, but I’m definitely not as dismissive of these as I used to be (though part of that could be the mental Stockholm Syndrome Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan and Sean Fennessey have given me). Once I finished Pt. I, I felt like I could re-watch it; once I finished Pt. II I felt like my eyes were melting out of my head and onto my hands (this could be because I had just watched 377 minutes of a story). I will probably never do it again, unless it’s the weekend after Christmas and AMC is just going for it-at least then I’ll have intermissions every 20 or so minutes telling me to go shop at Target.

[tipsycad147]

Garden Gnomes

By shirleytwofeathers

Origin: Teutonic

Emblem: Mushrooms, especially fly agaric or fly amanita

Plant: The presence of galbanum (freula galbaniflua) allegedly invites the protection of gnomes.

Iconography: The standard garden gnome depicts an older male with a long beard and peaked red hat. He wears a big belt over leggings, a blue tunic, and boots. Sometimes they wear gardeners’ aprons.

The name “gnome” stems from the Greek word “genomos” which means “earth dweller”. They are said to be one of the elemental spirits defined by Paracelsus, as representative of the Earth Element.

Gnomes are subterranean spirits now most associated with garden statuary. They resemble tiny people. Paracelsus described gnomes as two spans high. (A span is the width of an outstretched human hand,) Unlike dwarves or kobolds, gnomes are not mine or cave spirits but tend to live beneath human gardens. They have a reputation for emerging at night to do a little helpful garden work. Garden gnomes allegedly bring luck.

Gnomes tend to be quiet, private, taciturn spirits, but they respond well to gifts and offerings. They can be persuaded to become loyal allies, guardians, and helpers. Female gnomes may be especially taciturn; they are rarely depicted. However folklore indicates that their are entire gnome communities with male and female gnomes of all ages. Gnomes maintain good relationships with birds, rabbits, foxes, hedgehogs, and squirrels.

Originally, gnomes were thought to provide protection, especially of buried treasure and minerals in the ground.  Gnomes were regarded as good luck charms by our ancestors and would often be found living in the rafters of barns where they would help watch over livestock. They are still used today.

Garden Gnomes vs “Actual” Gnomes

Modern garden gnomes are based on the legendary “Gnomes” of myth, mysticism, and fairy tales. Gnomes have historically been described as small (from a few inches to a foot or two in height) stout beings who live in Nature – usually underground. European magicians and other mystics considered gnomes the most common and important elemental spirits of the ‘Earth’ element (the other three classical elements being: ‘Water,’ ‘Fire,’ and ‘Air’).

Gnomes were said to wear conical hats and to be able to move through the earth itself as easily as we humans walk upon it, yet if any of these underground dwellers were caught out in the daylight it was said that the rays of the Sun turned them into stone.

Sometimes gnomes were said to have magical powers to protect or punish people – or to reward them with happiness. Gnomes are also said to be guardians of secret underground treasures – especially gold! Even in modern times gnomes are said by some –such as the highly influential mystic Rudolph Steiner – to be involved in the hidden processes of plant life. In fact many farms, including prize-winning wineries, follow principles based on these beliefs.

Garden Gnomes Today

More modern descriptions of gnomes usually emphasise their bright red pointed hats, solid coloured clothes, and the long white beard of the typical male. Though sightings of female gnomes are rarely reported, gnome women are generally thought to be beard-free.

The name ‘gnome’ is said to come from the Latin word ‘gnomus’ which is thought to possibly come from the Greek word ‘gnosis’ meaning “knowledge” (i.e. of hidden treasure), but is more likely rooted in the word ‘genomos’ meaning “earth dweller”

A garden gnome adds a bit of whimsy and a connection to the old world, where farmers believed the good luck charm could help their fields yield more produce and protect them from thieves, pests and other problems. They were also thought to help gardeners in the night, which we all could use!

The earliest gnome statuary was produced in Thuringia, Germany, in the early nineteenth century and was based on German folklore. Gnome statues potentially welcome and attract real gnomes, as well as Flower Fairies or other benevolent spirits. The earliest statues were carefully wrought, hand-painted terra-cotta and were exceptionally popular.

By the 1960’s, cheaper plastic and resin versions were mass-produced. The old terra-cotta ones are now extremely valuable and are family heirlooms. Garden gnome statues tend to evoke very visceral responses. Some people adore and collect them. Others loathe them so much that they feel justified destroying or removing other people’s property.

Gnomes are the subject of modern entertainment as well as old folktales. The animated children’s television show The World of David the Gnome was highly unusual in that it depicted both male and female gnomes. The gnomes in J. K. Rowling’s Harry Potter series are garden pests, not helpers.

Some Handy Garden Gnome Trivia:

Gnomes are banned from the Royal Horticultural Society Chelsea Flower Show. We think that’s a crying shame, personally.

There are three categories of mass-produced gnomes: Worker gnomes, who always carry tools like fishing rods, shovels, or hammers; at-ease gnomes who typically carry a pipe and cultural gnomes who have a musical instrument in hand. Rock stars.

Gnomes have a life expectancy of 400 years.

Their main enemies? Mean humans who destroy the environment and trolls – obviously.

Male gnomes always wear red caps.

The world’s oldest garden gnome, called Lampy, has been living at Lamport Hall in the UK for 125 years and is worth a cool £2 million, or €2.4m!

In the 1980s, the Gnome Liberation Front stole gnomes and sent the owners photos of them from landmarks around the globe.

Gnomes are generally vegetarian and eat foods like nuts, mushrooms, peas, beans, potatoes, applesauce, fruit, berries, tubers, spices, vegetables, and preserves for dessert.

They like to drink mead dew made from fermented honey, fermented raspberries, and spiced gin as a nightcap.

Gnomes kiss by rubbing noses. They also use nose rubbing as a greeting equivalent to human handshaking.

Forest Gnomes:

There are gnomes that live in the forest in the Philippines.  You can tell where they live if there’s a hill of dirt that’s a bit higher than everything else. And when you go by them, you’re supposed to be really, really respectful and say:

“Excuse me. I’m just walking by. I don’t mean any harm.”

Even if you’re not doing anything, or no one said anything, or you’re not sure. You’re just supposed to do it. If you don’t, there could be blow back as per the following:

“There was a story on the Philippines news channel, about a kid who had huge swollen lips. You could hardly see his eyes. He was speaking to reporters and he said that he was walking by the hills and his friend told him that you’re supposed to say sorry and he said, “No, I’m not. I don’t care. I don’t believe in that stuff.”

Then the next day he woke up with a tumour on his face. Not so much as a tumour, but as his lips were super swollen. It looked like someone blasted air into his lips. Like super Botox.”

Walking Gnomes

The following story is very interesting in the fact that this is one of the few stories from Mexico where inanimate objects, that are not haunted, come to life. The Mexican culture does not traditionally include creatures such as gnomes but instead, it consist of larger creatures and ghosts. This is because the country did not originally have gnomes until places, such as the United States introduced them to there.

“In Mexico they believe that garden gnomes come alive at night. The proof they have of it is that my grandma used to own gnomes and her neighbours used to own gnomes in Mexico. And the garden gnomes the next day would be found in different places and a lot of stuff was broken and sometimes my mom and her sister would wake up at night, and they would hear things, but when they looked outside, they would never see the gnomes there. So there’s that story that they become alive at night in Mexico.”

“Recently I was talking to one of my cousins who told that story to some friends whose parents were also from Mexico. And this friend told my cousin that he actually believes that story, because one night the garden gnomes were not where they had placed them. They found them inside the house one night in the house and they were rolling in the hallway. Since then, they got rid of the gnomes, or at least they tried to. They threw them away but the next day they were in the same place they had put them before.”

The Secret Lives of Garden Gnomes

From Neopets.com, here’s a story about what Gnomes do at night. I’m pretty sure this is a made up story, but I thought it was fun, and who knows? Maybe it isn’t altogether fictional. You be the judge:

The reason Garden Gnomes come alive at night is because they don’t want anyone to see them moving around. This is pretty practical, considering the fact that if any regular person saw them talking and moving, they’d want to put them in some sort of abnormality museum!

But what do garden gnomes do at night? Well, I was watching out my window at the gnomes in my garden one night, and I saw one, a Bruce gnome, have them all line up in a row as he paced back and forth in front of them, a small twig in his hand like he was the instructor of a military camp.

He was telling each gnome which direction to go in order to pick up free food. You see, garden gnomes thrive like ants. They all go off to find food that people may have dropped accidentally or on purpose, and sometimes they even venture into houses and borrow food with no intention of returning (also known as stealing, but they take such small portions most people never even notice).

After retrieving food they rush back to their home centre (which is usually a tunnel in the ground leading into a large, dug out room, since gnomes are not claustrophobic) and report to the leader, in this case the Bruce gnome. He then tallies their lot and tosses the foot morsel into another room in their tunnel, where they store their food. They act sort of like chipmunks, storing food and hunting for it, of course, gnomes are not carnivores though.

And, to their enormous pleasure, when they have collected a lot of food, they sit down at have a feast! Yes, a feast! It’s a feast of little sweets, candy peas, popcorn pieces, and sometimes even whole flower cakes (although they take more than one gnome to carry). But besides eating, what else do gnomes do? Well, I’m glad you asked.

You wouldn’t suspect this, but when they have leisure time, gnomes enjoy swimming. They are very pleased to find a Neogarden where someone owns a pond. They jump right in, clothes and all, and swim and dive around in the cool water for hours at a time. And when they want to dry off, they take a large leaf and wrap themselves up in it, drying off quickly.

Aside from swimming, gnomes also enjoy crafts. They may take green blades of grass and weave adorable little baskets or even blankets. They can also take pieces of bark off of trees and sticks and carve them with sharp stones into little sculptures. Gnomes are very talented in the artistic field, and if you see a stick carved into a Meepit, you know who did it.

Aside from swimming and crafts, another thing gnomes enjoy is sports. They might play their own version of soccer by kicking around a rounded stone, or even play basketball by throwing a rock into a hole. This not only provides exercise, but gives them lots of time together to just have fun.

But when they aren’t playing and having fun, what do they do? Throughout the whole day, they sleep, and at night they either have fun or look for food, so there’s only a little bit of time left for something else-note-taking! This is sort of like their education, which is actually an education of…what else? Neopets!

Note-taking is when gnomes grab their oversized pencils and paper, which they “borrow” from Neopets, then marching through the sleeping pet’s house and going to their bedroom, where they climb up on the bed and observe the neopet’s sleeping habits. They are trying to find out where Neopets came from. Maybe all Neopets evolved from Myncis!

Another sort of educational activity that gnomes practice is counting. It isn’t counting like 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, though, no, no no! It’s counting in a different way. The gnomes version of counting may be why your plushies eye was missing when you woke up.

Gnomes will trample in when you are catching some Z’s (it seems all of their educational activities are while Neopets are slumbering) and then they will be assigned a number (by there leader, the Bruce gnome) and then they shall go “counting” which, in other words, is another type of stealing. They have to pick up ten, for example (or however many their number is) trinkets, like plushie eyes, toothpicks, or buttons, and bring them back to their tunnel, storing them in a safe place. What they do with them I do not know, but I suspect they might make furniture or something of the sort using what they found.

One last thing I found out is that gnomes are a fan of bright colours and patterns. In the early morning, I saw them getting ready for bed and they were wearing long pants and long sleeved shirt PJ’s of hot pink, bright purple, lime green, and sunny yellow colour. Some had stripes, some had polka dots, and some even had swirlies! Gnomes are very interesting, no?

Now you know what gnomes do when you aren’t looking, what their secret life is all about. If you look out your window at night, you might be able to see them moving and hear them talking in their high pitched voices. But be warned-if they see you watching them, well, I won’t go there…

Sources:

House and Garden

Encyclopedia of Spirits

Love To Know

Folklore USC

Just Say Gnome

https://shirleytwofeathers.com/The_Blog/powers-that-be/garden-gnomes/

[lilyswritings]

Hold On To Me

Author’s note: Okay so this fic spawned from a few different requests I got, but in the end I kind of ignored the requests and did my own thing?? Sorry guys. But anyway, ever since I saw Wonder Woman (the day it came out lmao) and then the two other times since then (bc I’m trash) I’ve been developing this idea and yeah. Hope you guys enjoy!  Also! Please listen to ‘Heart’ by Sleeping At Last, as that’s the song I listened to while writing and it kind of fits! 

Summary: You joined this godawful war alongside your brother and his best friend. As a female pilot, already under stress due to your gender, the war became too much, ripping away everything you loved - but Steve was always by your side. Then he disappeared, and you had nothing left. So when he turns up out of nowhere with a stunning warrior goddess by his side, there are mixed feelings that arise. But you cannot let yourself get distracted by feelings that may or may not be reciprocated - there is still a war to be won. 

Part One / Part Two / Part Three 

Steve Trevor x Reader

   The first time you met Steve Trevor was back in 1916, the year you’d been assigned to British forces. You were waiting for your brother to return from a flight, so that the two of you could celebrate the fact that you’d finally been assigned a mission, and your pilot’s license - an incredibly difficult feat, due to the fact that you’re a woman. You were stood in the middle of the large hangar when something hurtled into you. 

   The two of you were sent sprawling, your flight suit barely giving much protection from the concrete floor of the hangar. Groaning, you sat up, pulling off your helmet in order to be able to think properly, your eyes catching sight of the blonde man scrambling to pick up some of his papers - your eyes also caught sight of the small Captain badge on the lapel of his jacket.

   “I’m sorry I-” The man started, but stopped when he saw your face. “Oh.” His comment simply made you roll your eyes - since you’d gotten your pilot’s license, men seemed to always have the same reaction to you; incredulity and amusement at the thought of a female pilot.

    “Here.” You replied, holding back a snarky comeback (this man was your superior, technically), while handing him some of the papers he’d dropped. It was then that you took in his appearance - handsome face, boyish blond hair, bright blue eyes... 

    Nevermind that. He took back the papers, still staring at you, and you rolled your eyes and took the bait. “Can I help you with something?” You tried desperately to sound polite.

    “Nothing, just - have we met?” He asked, and you furrowed your brow. “You remind me of someone.” You opened your mouth to reply but stopped when you spotted someone jogging towards the two of you.

   “Andrew!” You shouted, heart swelling at the sight of your brother who promptly barreled into you, pulling you into a smothering hug and lifting you off the ground. 

   “How was the first day of official flying?” Your brother asked, finally letting go of you and pushing his hair out of his eyes. He then paused as he noticed the man besides him, glancing between the man and you. “So you’ve met Steve, then.” When his words were followed by silence he laughed, gesturing to the blonde man.

   “Steve, this is my little sister, Y/N. Y/N, this is Steve Trevor, a good friend of mine.” Although you rolled your eyes at the use of ‘little sister’ rather than just ‘sister’, you nodded at him.

   Your eyebrows raised as you remembered the letters your brother had written you about his previous missions. “So this is Steve, as in ‘saved your life from the Germans’ Steve?” You asked, and your brother nodded and clapped his friend on the back.

    “The one and the same.” He said, and you noticed the admiration in his eyes as he looked down at Steve.

    “Well then, glad to finally meet you. Thanks for keeping an eye on my flyboy of a brother.” You said, outstretching your hand to shake Steve’s.

    “It was my pleasure.”

    The pub is already a mess. You have never been a heavy drinker - far from it, actually - but due to the harrowing letter you’d received, telling you to assume the man that meant the most to you in the world was dead... A few drinks couldn’t hurt. Besides, it gives you an excuse to look after- Oh Christ, where’s he gone now-

    "CHARLIE!” You shout over the noise filling the bar, watching the Scotsman be picked up by the shirt and punched repeatedly. You shove your way through the crowd, planting yourself firmly in between Charlie and the fist that was hurtling towards him. Instantly, the owner of said fist stops, narrowing his eyes at you.

    "Out of the way, girlie." He growls, finally letting go of Charlie's shirt. You roll your eyes, lacking the energy or willpower to fight this man and turn to tug your friend over to your table - when the brute reaches for your arm. You respond by whipping around and kneeing him in the groin, watching him fall to the ground with a clenched jaw as a hush falls over the bar.

    “Didn’t think so.” You mutter, pushing your drunk friend over to the table where Sameer was sitting a few minutes ago, only to stop dead in your tracks. Your eyes widen, face turning white - and ironically, once could say it looks like you’ve seen a ghost. It takes a couple seconds for you to realize your feet have started moving, but when you do you’re hurtling towards the American man standing next to Sameer.

    “STEVE!” You shout, abandoning Charlie and engulfing Steve in your arms, breathing him in. He wraps his arms around you, squeezing you tightly, and you barely hold back a sob at how real and alive he is. “You were dead.” You mutter, your eyes blurred slightly by unshed tears.

     "I'm so sorry, I would have contacted you if I could have.” He mutters into the crook of your neck, squeezing you once more before letting you go.  “Y/N, this is Diana Prince. She pulled me from my sinking plane.” You turn and widen your eyes immediately, taking in the definitely-not-British woman standing by Steve.

    “Diana, this is Y/N, the best damn pilot around.” You shake your head despite the small smile on your lips, glancing back at Steve, who you still can’t believe is alive. 

    “He’s exaggerating, but hi. Y/N Y/L/N, at your service.” You hold out your hand and she shakes it, her grasp incredibly strong, and you watch as a twinge of confusion passes through her expression as she glances between you and Steve. “What?” You ask, and she pauses.

    “Why are you not out fighting right now?” She asks, her accent continuing to mesmerize you, and you frown slightly. 

    “I, uh... I’m no longer in the forces.” You state, your gaze falling to the floor, but Diana persists. 

    “If you are such a great pilot why would you leave?” 

    You sigh, glancing at Steve who has a solemn expression on his face. “I guess... It wasn’t meant to be.” You reply, deciding to leave it at that. “So, Diana, what brings you to jolly old-” You’re cut off by the butt of a gun being shoved in your face.

    “Not so tough now, are you?” The man slurs, and out of the corner of your eye you see Steve lunge forwards, but stop when Diana steps in front of him. With amazing speed, she shoves the man back, pulling the gun out of his hand and kicking him, sending him flying across the bar and into a pile of chairs. Then she hands the gun to Steve. Silence, and then-

    “Steve, can I borrow you?” You don’t wait for an answer, grabbing the arm of his jacket and tugging him to the side. “Okay, I need answers,” You start. “First, you go undercover as a German pilot, which I found out because Etta told me, not you; then every single person you work for tells me you’ve gone M.I.A. and that I should just assume you’ve died - which I do;”

    You watch his expression turn solemn but continue. “Then, you show up with a really oblivious foreign woman who looks like she fell from heaven, and can disarm a man in about four seconds flat, with absolutely ZERO explanation!” You shout, and he grimaces, rubbing the back of his neck.

    “Look, it’s a long story-” His reply makes you scoff, jaw clenching. 

   “Steven Rockwell Trevor don’t you ‘long story’ me after making me think you’re dead.” He rolls his eyes, glancing back at the group, where Sameer is very obviously flirting with Diana and Charlie is nursing yet another drink. 

    “Fine, okay? Her name is Diana, she pulled me out of my sinking plane after I crash landed on her hidden island full of Amazonian warrior women where she happens to be the princess, and she came with me because she believes can end the war by killing the Greek god Ares.” He explains, and you narrow your eyes. 

   “Hm. Okay.” Is all you say, and he raises an eyebrow. 

   "What, that’s it? You believe me?” He sounds incredulous and you smile slightly. 

   “You promised me you’d never lie to me. I trust you, Steve. I don’t fully believe it, but I believe you’re telling me the truth.” You state, expression softening as you look up at him and meet his cerulean eyes. “If anything I’m just happy you’re alive.” 

   He chuckles lowly. “Yeah, me too.” Steve mutters, pulling you into another small hug and turning back to the table. You sit next to the newcomer, eyes darting over Sami and Charlie, and turn to her.

   “Diana Prince, huh?” You ask, and she nods. “Welcome to the gang.”

[iammarylastar]

Warning: racist content, violence and blood.

Chapter 4: Troubles

“Awww! What a gorgeous baby you have there! Boy or girl?”

The lady of the immigration service who was in charge with them couldn’t stop babbling, a wide grin taped on her face.

“She was meant to be a boy. She’s a she!” Stefan showed off, his precious baby girl in his arms.

“What a drop dead gorgeous lady! How old are you Princess?” She dropped her pen to reach out and stroked the fatty calves of the wiggling baby girl.

“She will hit 6 weeks in a few days. She was born on board!”

“She is a beauty! Congratulations and ̀ welcome to Australia!” She nicely said. Australian seemed to be very nice and welcoming people.

“And what’s your name, little angel?”

“Miss Lizzy Gibson! You’re not paid to talk rain and good weather with migrants but to register them.” Her boss coldly called her to order.

Blushing furiously to be scold like a child, the young woman adjusted her glasses up her nose, grabbed her pen back, cleared her throat and asked, a serious frown between her eyebrows:

“OK. Name?”

“Courtney.” Stefan proudly announced, lifting the tiny girl up to tickle her chubby cheek with his nose.

“Well. Your first name Ma'am?” She conscientiously wrote down the precious information.

“Mieke.” She answered, making the woman stop writing.

“Jewish?” She quirked an eyebrow.  The woman nodded shyly but kept her eyes straight on hers.

All the Jewish people who disembarked here in Sydney usually looked exhausted, frightened and lost, averting their gaze down to the floor, trembling in fear to be beaten to death or worse while confessing their religion. They’d often lost everything : family, friends, house, honour and dignity.  But not those two. Three. The young couple seemed happy and blessed, together with that cutie pie the man held lovingly against his chest.

“You?” She asked the man, suddenly hit by his stunning blue gaze, her mouth getting dry before such an handsomeness.

“Stef… Stephen.” He hesitated. And got obviously uncomfortable. Weird.

“And where are you from?” Her job was also to find out traitors or Nazis. Her hierarchy’s instructions were to send any suspicious case to the upper stage, where strong men would roughly get the truth out of them.

“London, England.” The woman firmly uttered.

That made sense, their accent sounded European’s. Most of the candidates to exile came from this troubled part of the world.  The man, as handsome as he looked, was still acting suspiciously, nervously stroking and patting his newborn’s back, shifting from one foot to another in a too fast pace.

Nonetheless, she couldn’t resolve herself to denounce his strange behaviour, promising him and the whole family to the hell of policy questioning, demand in custody during what could be a months-long investigation.

“And I guess you lost your identity papers… whilst the destruction of your house?” She started, her long, meaningful look inviting Mieke to complete the story.

“Yes. An air raid destroyed all the area where we lived. These two suitcases are all we have now. And her.” Mieke spoke, subtly shoving back in her pocket the false documents she had been fiddling for the beginning of their encounter. Covering her husband’s hand with hers, stroking both her man and child, she threw a begging stare at the woman.

“I’m so sorry to hear about such a tragedy. Thanks God you’re safe. And your daughter will have a good life here.”

“Again welcome to Sydney Mr and Mrs Courtney. I wish you the very best, for you and miss… Jesus I forgot to note it!”

Stefan opened his mouth, the woman obviously misunderstood what he had said, but Mieke cut him off.

“Brittany. We thought it could be a nice reminding of where she’s from. It’s out little Bree.” She lied with such self-assurance Stefan thought for one second it was true.

Plus he liked how it sounded. A hint of Brandt, a hint of their past. The perfect name for their baby girl. The perfect mix of their past to start to build their future. A brighter future for them all.

“Owww! How beautiful name you’re wearing darling!” She rambled in awe again, while writing the name down the precious paper. She checked all the items were filled then stamped the three copies, and handed one to Mieke.

“You have me disturbed from my task, little doll. Sorry I can’t resist to kiss her, may I?”

She was already up her chair, walking around her desk. She stopped near Stefan, waiting for permission. He nodded though he felt like she was playing tricks to take his daughter from him and throw him in jail for misspelling his name or caught in the act of lying.

He relaxed a bit whilst crossing the genuine shiny gaze with which she looked at his offspring. Lightly patting the baby girl’s back, she attacked her chubby cheeks, stroking and kissing every pieces she could.

“Ohhh little princess you’re so adorable!” She glanced at Mieke, both women had a large grin taped on their faces. Women. ..

“I’m already fond of her! ”

“Miss Gibson! ” the boss barked from behind them.  “Contact with migrants is totally forbidden, so have I to remind you the consequences of disobey an order?”

Startling, the woman squeezed quickly Stefan’s hand and rushed back to her desk, apologizing to her grumpy boss, her look on the floor.

Sitting down, she gathered the papers spread on her desk, mumbling to the couple.

“Sorry, I couldn’t help it. Was worth the reprimand.” Then spoke louder the usual speech  “Welcome to Australia Mr Courtney. The authority will study your case and you’re waited next month with wife and child to finalize your identity papers and immigration file.”

She wrote down the date and time of the appointment on a squared paper and reached out for Mieke to take it. Miss Gibson winked at the couple, placing her forefinger on her lips to seal whatever secret she wanted to keep from her boss’ ears.

*

Stefan grabbed then yanked at Mieke’s wrist, making her face and bump into him. Stealing her lips in a searing kiss, he pinned her roughly against the wall of their new flat.

Gasping for air, Mieke whispered whilst being nipped and licked along her neck.

“Stefan, what’s that for?”

Not that she was complaining, but it has been a long, stressful day and she craved to test their bed.

They had walked across the whole town, seeking after an address miss Lizzy had scrawled in the back of the appointment note.

128 Kookaburras Street, Sydney. Ask for Cora. Good luck. Lizzy Gibson.

They had finally reach the street, exhausted and soaked in sweat, Mieke’s arms burned and hurt for holding miss Courtney, Stefan’s shoulders and hands dead for lifting the two luggage for miles. Both had worn their heavy woolen coats all the way, under the hard sun of the Australian summer.

Cora was Lizzy’s cousin. She lived in a small house which had an extra tiny flat to rent next door. She was as in love at the first sight with baby Bree as Lizzy had been and more than happy to have that lovely couple as neighbours.

The two floors furnished flat was cozy, there was just a kitchen and a water closet downstairs and a bedroom upstairs. No bathroom here but she nicely offered them to use hers as often as they needed. Plus a free babysitter whenever they want or need to entrust the little girl.

Bree was soon asleep, they manage to make a crib with a blankets and a big basket they borrowed to Cora. Time to settle down and enjoy their new home.  Mieke would happily crash down their bed and sleep for the next three days.

The way her husband grinded against her thigh made her realize they could test all their new bed’s potential.

He grinned against her skin, teasing her:

“I just can’t wait to start our honeymoon babe. ”

“Honeymoon?"  It must be the Australian thick air, they’ve been married for 6 months already and had enjoyed a long, sensual, suave and Earth-shattering honeymoon in London.

"I’ve never got to make love to my new wife.” Lifting her up swiftly from the ground, he walked her towards their bedroom, which he intended to fully take advantage of.

“Come here, Mrs Courtney, let’s have some fun in there.”

*

Unfortunately, all the money they had saved wasn’t worth that much then.  Untoward side effect of an economy being in war. Marvin provided a job on the docks to Stefan, they needed arms to unload the cargos down the ship. After only three days of getting up at the crack of dawn and lifting too much heavy stuff till sunset, Stefan had to forfeit, the wound on his stomach hurt like a bitch and he got fever, which had Mieke worried to death.

Marvin worried too and strictly forbad Stefan to come back to work. He promised him to find a job more appropriate, like truck driver or foreman but in no case he would want to see Stefan lifting heavy boxes.

That stubborn German insisted to leave the bed and have his job back. He had to afford the rent and refused to see Mieke forced to leave their daughter to work herself to death.

“I’m not the one who’s dying for working my ass off.” She snapped at him when he wretchedly fell on the floor, too weak to stand up straight.

“Stop scolding me woman. You’d better bring your little ass here and give me a hand to get up.” He laughed when she wiggled her ass before his nose, pretty sure it could help him to get better.

Pulling on his hand, she managed to have him up, letting him lean heavily on her shoulder. Stefan stumbled back, hooking his arms around her waist, making them both tumble on the bed. He rolled over her, hissing from some pain coming from his abdomen.

She laughed out loud when feeling his not-weak-anymore member which was grinding against her belly.

“Let me practice you once or twice. It will help to recover faster.” He teased in her ear, biting on her neck.

“Word.” She just uttered, before being kissed roughly and hearing her panties torn and thrown to the side.

* They got up early that day. They were expected at the Immigration department to get their official Australian documents as political refugees.  They were registered as English citizen and with a job and respectable situation, it won’t be long before they got their Australian citizenship. Technically, Courtney  -damn her name is Brittany now- could be considerate as an Aussie, like they say Down Under, the boat she was born on flew the Australian flag. To tell the truth, none of them really cared. As long as they were together, a roof over their heads, happiness filling their plates.

New name, new start, new life.

They celebrated that day by having one of the best sex they’d ever had,  laughing between their sighs of pleasure, him tickling her sides while she was purposely leaving marks on his neck.

Had he been aware it was the last time he was making love to his wife, he would have made it last longer. He would have been more careful to record her slightest moans, the feeling of her lips on him, the softness of her skin and curves. Every line of her beautiful face.

Wails coming from the crib forced them to get out of bed, and get ready for their appointment.

Knock, knock.

Stefan quickly put a shirt on and walked downstairs to open the door to this unexpected visitor. Probably Cora, their neighbour, who was used to bring them extra veggies or bottle of milk she had. Or someone turned angry by their loud screams of their latest ecstasy. He chuckled at the thought as he grabbed the doorknob.

“Mr Stephen Courtney? "  Two men all suited in seriousness and black uniforms were standing on the threshold, papers in hand.

"Yes?”

He thought Australian authorities were so kind to bring them the documents at home. It would keep them from a long walk across the city; Rain was beginning to fall, and he wouldn’t want Courtney  -Bree, he wasn’t used to call her that- to be soaked and grumpy. He drew a filthy smirk on his face; he could put the baby back in her bed and Mieke back to their.

“Does a certain Captain Stefan Brandt mean something to you, Mr. Courtney?” The man asked.

His heart stopped. His mouth got dry. His grip tightened on the knob, his knees getting weak for a second.

“No.” He curtly replied.

Mieke popped up behind him, and stopped the baby talk she was singing to Courtney. Bree.

“We were talked a German SS officer by the name of Stefan Brandt had arrived by sea with wife and kid, and tries to hide behind false name here in Sydney.”

Despite the stabs in his guts, Stefan  -Stephen!- stood up straight, poker face.

“I’m sorry I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I’m afraid I can’t accept your answer Mr. Courtney. The sailor who spit out the information was pretty clear: a tall dark blond male with blue eyes and a damn pretty brunette who gave birth in the ship to a lovely baby girl, about 6 weeks ago. How old is your baby girl Mr Courtney? If I’m not mistaken, you told the immigration service lady she was born on board.”

Connor.

This stupid Irish was almost dumb with an empty stomach, but completely unable to hold his tongue after three drinks.

Stephen clenched his teeth, and didn’t answer.

Staring coldly behind his shoulder, the man continued :

“Does that pretty lady of yours know about that?”

“No. She doesn’t.” He cut him off.

“If I may, I’d love to hear it from her.” He insisted, one step forward.

“No, you may not."  Stefan stepped back to protect his wife and child.

"Now if you would excuse us, we’re expected.” Stefan grabbed Mieke’s hand, interlocking their fingers together. No. Nobody would divide them.

The man stiffened and reached his arm out, preventing them to walk further out.

“I’m sorry but you’re not going anywhere. You’ll follow us to the police station where we’ll proceed to an official interrogation. I’d like to clear some things up about who you are. Or who you pretend to be.”

Mieke crushed her husband’s hand, holding her breath. No. Not that curse again.  She bit her lips which were going to whisper her husband’s name. She wouldn’t risk making a mistake and jeopardize his chance.

“Baby…” she tried.

The tense filled the air around them and Brittany started wailing, her cries getting louder despite her mother’s attempt to calm her down. Losing battle.

The man in black grinned devilishly. “Think wise, Mr. Courtney or whatever your name is. We ’re empowered to use the force if necessary and there are things nobody here is willing for your wife and your adorable child to witness. Aren’t we?”

Stefan clenched his teeth, jawlines sharp. He could feel Mieke trembled. Following these guys was the smartest thing to do, they had repeated their story again and again, to be ready for a moment like that. They had just pictured they would be settled in an office of the Immigration Department building, not here, on their own household. He nonetheless couldn’t resolve himself to let go off the knob he was pulverizing.

No. He won’t leave his house. He won’t leave his wife. Or his daughter. No way. He won’t allow anyone to jeopardize his family, his happiness. He couldn’t stand to figure out his baby girl growing up without her dad. Never let his devastating childhood happen again.

The man was not known to be patient. He was the head detective of the Sydney police department, in charge with the possibly ‘alien enemy’ cases. He was very skilled to detect the cheaters, he got nose for lies and inconsistencies in the stories that are a complete fabrication. He could worm the truth out of the toughest guy, beating up those rats was his favorite part of his job. He had some Nazis or deserters on his list of prides, and was craving to add this one. As cute as his little family seemed, he wouldn’t fool him. A German wuss and a Jewish princess, he shivered in disgust. He would never allow bad blood invade his country. Australia deserved the best of white, honest people.

The cries of the ashamed mixed-blood baby started to piss him off and the brazen faced standing still in front of him wrecked his nerves. He was the law, he was mandated by the Australian government to take that man for questioning. He had to submit to his authority.

“Please, follow me.” He ordered.

Stefan didn’t even move a finger, but tightened his grip on Mieke. He glanced at her, to snap once again to her gorgeous face, which was wasted by terror. She was clung to her screaming daughter, petrified by the situation.

Couldn’t they just be happy? Left alone, just the three of them?

“Now!” The man barked, grabbing Stefan’s wrist.

Game over.

“Don’t fucking touch me!” Stefan yanked at the man’s grip. He knew he was wrong -oh yes he was- but he saw no other options.

Though the man was short and skinny, he was quick to strongly punch Stefan in the face, then in the guts, obviously used to fight.

Mieke screamed as she witnessed his husband crashing down the floor, grunting loudly as he wrapped his arms on his stomach.

She jumped forward to grab his husband, the baby roaring out in her other arm.  The man bluntly pushed her backward, purposely crashing a foot on Stefan’s hand as he poorly tried to roll on all four.

“Bastard!” He growled between his teeth, the taste of blood invaded his mouth. “Stay away from her!”

The man bent over his face, pressing his heel harder on Stefan’s hand, eliciting a loud rumble from the back of his throat.

“Are you giving me orders, Mr. Courtney? Do you think you’re allowed to open your mouth? I gave you the opportunity to talk lately but you just screwed it up.” He lifted his heel just enough to crash it violently back on Stefan’s hand.

Stefan howled in pain, curling his knees under his chest in a desperate attempt to stand up.

“Down!” He yelled at Stefan, kicking violently in his side again. “You’ll stand up only when I decide you could.”

“No!” Mieke screamed out, kneeling down near him.

The man kicked her roughly in the shoulder, making her fall hard on the floor. Tightening her grip on Courtney not to let her down, Mieke shrieked both in fear and rage.

“FUCK YOU!” Stefan shouted , tugging at the sleeve of the man who was threatening his family.

“Don’t you dare!"  The man lost his nerves and hit Stefan like his fist was a hammer, again and again until his knuckles got red.  Stefan could only glance at Mieke who was soaked in tears, hugging Courtney safely against her chest, rocking her to make her stop crying.

Then the man started kicking relentlessly on Stefan’s belly, smirking at the crack of his ribs. Gasping from a flash of pain, Stefan threw up, breakfast and blood, while hearing in the distance, his brain getting dizzy and confused:

"And consider yourself lucky I won’t throw your Jewish wife and spawn in a camp. They’re all full of rats and black beetles. I don’t want to add more garbage out there.” The man said in his ear, throwing a threatening glance to Mieke.

“Mieke…” Stefan weakly whispered.

The man viciously smirked in contentment.  He had warned him, he was the law. He had power of life and death on strangers, mostly traitors to their countries. He doubted for a second that the guy was a soldier, a captain. He was so weak, despite his large frame and bulging arms.

The woman was still crying , the baby screaming for her little life.

“Shut the fuck up!” He growled at the two females, walking across Stefan’s body, a threatening fist over his head.

Mieke crept back against the wall, hiding her baby girl with her arms. The palm violently hit her face, making her head jerk to the side. Crouching down, the man wiped the tears that soaked her face, letting trails of blood, Stefan’s blood, on her bruised jaw.

“Look at you, poor lamb. Sometimes I feel like the Führer is right. Jewish aren’t better than those dirty natives. You’re even not able to find someone strong enough to protect you.” Narrowing his eyes to scrutinize her face and swollen cheek, he snorted.

“What a shame, you’ve got a damn pretty face. Stay hidden until the bruises disappear and then you could hook a bit to save money.  Pretty Jewish princesses like you make good whores on the docks.”

She averted her eyes from his disgusting lustful stare and locked Stefan’s beaten face. Clenching her trembling jaws not to let a sigh or a sob out, she silently cry watching the waste that was her husband.

Stefan couldn’t move a thing, turning his head to witness that bastard hit his wife was already a miracle. Tears flowing down his face, blood slipping out from his cut mouth, he made a lame attempt to reach out his hand towards her.

“Mieke..” he barely whispered, bubbles of blood spitting from his mouth and nostril.

“DAMMIT! This vermin is hard to knock down!” The man left Mieke to face the nearly unconscious body of that so-called Mr. Courtney.

One last kick in his abs, one last punch on his jaw, one last heart-rending scream from Mieke calling his name covered by his daughter’s cries. Then nothing.

Black out.

@tigpooh67 @jaicourtneyseyes @kenziKen @bookwarm85 @beautifulramblingbrains @jaihardy @badassbaker @pathybo @jojuarez

@singingpeople @pernilleals @beltz2016 @captstefanbrandt  @writingismyhappytime @kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995 @jaihardi @ashtotes @muremlinchen @anditcametopass

@societalfailure

@red-diary

[nebris]

In the future, will the English language be full of accented characters?

Here's something to think about as you sip your latté (or your piña colada) while listening to Beyoncé (or Mötley Crüe): Just how important to the English language are accented characters? And will they withstand the test of time?

We've included accents in some words for a long time; after all, we like to steal words from languages such as French, Italian, and German. But they're not an official part of the English alphabet, partly because they weren't so easy to type or typeset, and partly because … well, they're not English, are they? But the letters w and j and q weren't English originally, either. Nor was the apostrophe. And the letters þ and ð were English until we got rid of them. So is the accent on its way out, or is it seeping in?

Technology has long influenced our use of letters in language. For example, English has always had the sounds we now spell with the letters th, but we used to be able to write them with þ and ð. When printing presses arrived from Europe, their sets of type didn't include those characters, so those characters disappeared. On the other hand, it wasn't until more recent centuries that English speakers (and writers) found it useful to have an official distinction between v and u and between i and j (before then, Julius was just another way of writing Ivlivs) or decided we had a use for the letter w that came from Europe. And we didn't really need q, but it looks so ... Latin! So, the sets of type for our printing presses included those letters.

In other words, we adopt letters for a handful of reasons: usefulness, aesthetics, and because, well, we simply can. We abandon letters when it becomes too difficult to write or print them out.

The apostrophe has a similar history. It was invented in Italy, introduced into French in the early 1500s to indicate a dropped letter (something French does a lot), and then borrowed into English later in the same century to indicate the same kind of thing: I'm, 'tis, can't. It also indicated a dropped e in the possessive, so Shakespeare's play Love's Labour's Lost was originally Loues Labour's Lost because the e was dropped from Laboures but not from Loues (remember that u and v weren't separate characters yet!). But the idea of using an apostrophe before s in all singular possessives — and after s in all plural ones — caught on over time, partly because it helped make some useful distinctions, but also because it made the speaker seem smart. And it was part of our sets of moveable type.

So what about accented characters? If English didn't steal words from everywhere, we probably wouldn't have much use for accents. We could use a mark to distinguish between, for instance, the noun and verb forms of protest (prótest versus protést), but we've gotten along for centuries without it. The New Yorker, probably unnecessarily, lets readers know typographically that it understands how to pronounce coördinate. But when we need to distinguish between rose and rosé, divorce and divorcé, expose and exposé, or resume and résumé, accents start to look very attractive.

They also have a certain exotic charm. As Emmy J. Favilla says in her BuzzFeed style guide A World Without "Whom," "I'm partial to using accent marks any chance I can get, because they are cute." Benjamin Dreyer, copy chief of Random House, makes his opinion clear in Dreyer's English: "Sojourning in a chateau can't be nearly as much fun as sojourning in a château." We have a lot of weird silent letters in English spelling (as in people, isle, phthisis) for no other reason than to display where we pillaged the word from, so we're certainly going to want to keep that extra soupçon of éclat on the façade of jalapeño. Otherwise we would look naive — sorry, naïve. It's no accident that so many accented letters are found in food terms; we take savory delight in what seems exotic.

And yet we just don't see them as truly essential. We no longer put the circumflex on rôle or hôtel. We often implement accents incompletely, rendering carménère (a type of red wine grape) as carmenère, Ångström (a very small unit of measurement) as Ångstrom, and résumé as resumé. And sometimes we add them where they didn't even exist in the source: latté, for instance, from Italian latte, which has no need of the accent because in Italian you always say the e; maté and animé likewise add an accent as acupuncture to rouse a final e that we might otherwise treat as silent, though the source languages had no such need.

Certainly they can be fashionable. The double-dot crown named variously the diaeresis and the umlaut (a name taken from the sound change it signifies, just like accent) is especially popular in branding, where it almost never indicates any difference in pronunciation. Branding expert Nancy Friedman maintains an ever-growing collection of decoratively umlauted names, starting with the band Blue Öyster Cult, progressing through Häagen-Dazs, on through Freshëns and Yogen Früz, and on to Söfft, Melōränge, and iögo.

But, as Friedman has pointed out, "The diacritical marks may make for spiffy logos, but they have a downside: They don't show up in the web address, and they're rarely reproduced in newspaper stories." In fact, accents are against the rules for newspaper stories: The Associated Press Stylebook says flatly, "Do not use any diacritical or accent marks because they garble for some users."

Obviously not everyone agrees with this. The New Yorker would not coöperate with anyone who wanted to take away its precious diaereses. The Chicago Manual of Style, the leading guide for many book publishers, plants its flag squarely in the accent camp: "Words, phrases, or titles from another language that occur in an English-language work must include any special characters that appear in the original language." And, technologically, Chicago is more with the times than the AP: We are not on typewriters anymore; Unicode has made a huge variety of accented characters widely available, and even smartphone users have the means to add every accent you'll find in almost any European language.

But as long as accents are for words "from another language," they're not really part of English. And that means accented characters aren't officially real in this language. At least not yet.

In the end, though, the gatekeepers of orthography are the editors. And the views of future generations of editors, who not only enjoy good typography, but tend to believe in getting things right, are more likely to favor the accent. And those who flatly scorn them risk being passé.

https://theweek.com/articles/843837/future-english-language-full-accented-characters?utm_source=pocket-newtab

[docholligay]

News Of The Day

So I told you the Patreon was off for March (and it is. It’s automatically set to go on hiatus, and Patreon assures me you will not be charged, and, if it is, I will call and have it all refunded.) This is because, in this year of me and Jill preparing to settle down and have a baby, I am going to Europe. I’ll be gone between March 6th and March 31st. 

Doc, that sounds like the worst possible way of settling down. Let me explain. No, there is too much, let me sum up. 

When I was a girl, going to Europe was my dream, and it was a dream that was like going to the moon--I come from a relatively poor background on both sides, particularly when I was young. No one in my family had been to the east fucking coast when I was a girl, I saw the ocean for the first time when I was 18 and only because I made it happen. But Europe, you see, was never going to happen, no matter how many avenues I tried, I was still a girl from the middle of nowhere who, regrettably had never been born into wealth. 

I was talking to my boss about how it was something I’d always wanted to do before I had a baby, and I was sad that it was pretty clear that wasn’t going to work out. Jill had wanted to send me, but we just couldn’t make it work. It was a thing she really longed to do for me before we had a baby, but the truck broke, and we need a new water heater--the banal things of life. It was disappointing, but it was a dream I was going to let die.

 My boss is a complex man, a rich white dude who nonetheless has a sense of compassion and generosity that occasionally strikes like lightning. So he gave me the money for plane tickets, train tickets, and a month off (unpaid). If you’re going to go once in your life, he said, try to make it count. SO I AM. I was originally going to go by myself, as I don’t have much trouble doing that, and actually enjoy a certain amount of solitude. I live in my head a lot. But ever since my Mom divorced my Dad she’s had a pile of money and weeks of vacation sitting there doing nothing, so I invited her to come along, and I thought she was going to cry with excitement. 

The Patreon has been an amazing help, and is going to cover my bills while I’m gone. But since it’ll be off that month, and for some of you who have always wanted to toss a couple bucks my way, but don’t want the month to month thing, I decided to set something up specifically for this trip. I want to add that I don’t expect anything--y’all have done enough for me, frankly. And I’ll still be able to borrow money from Mom to make it work, so you’re not ruining my life. Basically, I’m just asking you to help me out with a lifelong dream I’m getting out of the way.

 But there’s rewards! SHINY, FANTASTIC REWARDS. I’m not just asking for money, I want to do stuff for it. And when I say any character, I mean it. (Though, if I’m totally unfamiliar with even the property, you’re taking your life into your own hands) Want a postcard from Bill Cipher? PRETTY SURE I COULD KILL IT, ACTUALLY. A letter from Bastion? The most soulful beep and boops you’ll ever read. Usagi goes to the Paris Catacombs? DONE, WITH LOVE AND TENDERNESS.

 So here’s the breakdown:

 Any level: a photo post thanking you personally with a picture of me doing the thing!

 Tier One: a postcard of the country, from either me or your favorite character! Mailed from Europe.

 Tier Two: a two page ficlet of your fav character experiencing whatever you got me, or a two page letter from me about it. Mailed from Europe. Example of how I write about food here.

 Tier Three: I buy you a small souvenir from said locale, and wrap it up with a letter from your favorite character or me. Mailed upon my return, I can’t figure out the post offices THAT well.

 Tier Four: don’t do this, but if you want to, convo me first and we’ll work something out.

 How to do this, if you want to:

 Message me with what you want to sponsor and your email address. I’ll send you a request via paypal! And let me know which character(s) you’d like your letter/postcard from! 

Again, I have no expectation of anyone doing this, so no worries. I thank you anyhow! You’re all amazing. This is a dream I never thought I would fulfill, and all of you have had no small part in making it a reality. I wish I could tell you how much it means to me, and I look forward to all the new shades of adventure we’ll have together.

 THERE’S A LOT OF FOOD. I TRUST YOU ARE FAMILIAR WITH ME.

 Things that don’t cost anything are, obviously, not on here, so if you’d rather have a photo shot of say, Saint Chappele, and you get me a glass of wine, we can totally work that out.

 London, England

 Tier One

 A pint in a pub! [$5, two available] I feel like this needs no description, and yet. Mom and I are actually making an informal tour of East End pubs for Very Important Research Purposes. Lena wants you to buy me a drink. 

 Fish and chips on the street [$12] Fish and chips is one of those things that’s iconic, and it may be terrible (lol just kidding fried food is amazing) but I feel honorbound to finally have a proper try at it.

Bubble and Squeak and other Breakfast Atrocities [$15] Occasionally, I plan something just for the secret knowledge. I need to know what the hell bubble and squeak tastes like. You need me to know what the hell bubble and squeak tastes like. So I found a traditional British place to show me! 

Highgate Cemetary Tour [$15] There’s something that seems right about me wandering around in a park dedicated to the most beautiful ways of representing the mortality of humankind, do you think? 

 Oysters and Bubbly [$15] Ever since I read Tipping the Velvet, I feel like this is a quintessentially British thing, and I love the sea saltiness of oysters and the prickle of bubbly.

 Tour of Winston Churchill’s War Rooms [$20] Help me get tips for the underground bunker I’m going to need to build when the gays declare war!

Tier Two

Tower of London and Crown Jewels [$30] All my favorite things! Murder, torture, imperialism, and tacky jewelry. 

Afternoon Tea at the Ritz [$50] This is an exceedingly fancy little adventure, with delicate teacakes and a goddamn harpist, and I’ve always wanted to do it. I will FINALLY get to wear my special occasion dress.

Paris, France

Tier One

Glass of wine in a cafe [$7, five available] Again--when in Paris, drink like Parisians do. I would say Amelie wants you to buy me a drink, but I think we all know that’s a bold lie

A trip to the boulangerie next to our place [$12]  I am well aware than in Paris, you can throw a rock and hit a bakery, but I’m still charmed by the idea that we have one so close.

Tour of the Paris Catacombs  [$20] It’s a tunnel full of beautiful death. I belong here.

Fancy French chocolates [$20] There’s so many fine French chocolatiers, and we found a few near our place! This will get us a couple fancy chocolates to eat by the Seine

Lunch at a bistro with wine [$25, two available] There’s almost an overwhelming amount of food that looks good in Paris, and I am taking suggestions, but we found this little place that basically looks like cave that serves wine, and I’m all into it.

Tier Two

Lunch at Disneyland Paris at BILLY BOB’S WILD WEST BUFFET [$34] There is no way you don’t want me to share with the class French Disneyland’s understanding of the American West.

Dinner at a slightly nicer place, but also with wine [$40]

Tier Three

Day at Disneyland Paris [$70] One of my life goals, however shallow, vain, and foolish, is to go to every Disneyland/world before I die. This will make it two down and two to go and I think we all want to see my girlish excitement.

Tier Four

Cooking Class in Paris [$95] A cooking class with a professional chef! ANd we get to go to the market and selct stuff and make a four course meal and I have never taken a cooking class in my life so I am thrilled.

Zurich, Switzerland

Tier Two

A TRIP TO THE BIERGARTEN DOWN THE STREET WHERE NEITHER OF US HAVE ANY CLUE OF THE LANGUAGE BUT BY GOD I HAVE A PHRASEBOOK [$40] (beer and food both) 

Munich, Germany

Tier One

Tour of BMW factory [$9] YEAH ME AT THE BMW FACTORY. I am completely overwhelmingly excited for this, and you want to hear about it.

Drink at a swanky rooftop bar [$16] Yeah this is A COCKTAIL, but we’re mainly going there to be Kaiohs for a moment in time, so I promise to savor it. Any excuse to wear my fancy dress!

Traditional Bavarian Food with a traditional Bavarian [$20] I confess I have no idea if I can even eat traditional Bavarian food, but by god I know the German word for pork and I have no fear.

Trip to Neuschwanstein Castle [$22] This also includes the little castle next to it! IF YOU THINK I’M NOT GOING TO MAKE AN EICHENWALDE JOKE, STOP YOURSELF RIGHT THERE.

Tier Two

Dinner at Hofbrauhaus: Sauerbraten of Alpine Oc, Dampfnudel, and a beer yes I already know what I’m ordering shut up [$31] Remember when I was liveblogging Bake Off and I said “Wtf is a dampfnudel? THEY HAVE THEM HERE. I WILL FINALLY KNOW.

Zagreb, Croatia

Tier One

Swanky cocktail at Hotel Esplanade [$12]

Drinks at THE HOBBIT PUB [$14] Oath assures there are many magical Croatian liquors that I have never tried, some of which may have me believing that I am, in fact, Gandalf by the end of the night.

Tier Two

Room service for swanky Sailor Moon Night [$30] There’s two here in case someone wants to buy food for Oath, too. or there were, but Jet’s bought Oath’s and told em to get my fucking own. 

Dinner at Traditional Croatian restaurant [$33] I admit to having pretty limited knowledge of what Croatian food actually is, and assuming Oath isn’t just playing a massive trick on me and we’re actually performing some sort of fear factor for her amusement, we’re going to find out!

Wine Pairings for the fine dinner! [$55] The wines are specifically selected by a sommelier for each course, I’ve never had anything so fine and I can’t wait for the shade it brings to each course. 

Tier three

12 course plated dinner in a fine restaurant  [$77] You may have noticed a theme of doing Shit I Can’t Afford In America. Y’all, I am so excited for this, it’s the kind of meal one might find at the 400 dollar level or higher in the states. I have never, ever been able to afford something like this, and I am so excited.

Tier Four

Rental of a box at the Croatian National Theatre for Swan Lake [$100] Getting dressed all tony for our private box! Please believe that I am trying to get some tiny opera glasses, to complete the effect.

Night in a 5 star suite for Swanky Sailor Moon Night [$220] Oath and I, in a fancy hotel suite, Kaiohing it up and watching Sailor Moon over various Croatian liquors. THERE’S WIFI IN THE HOTEL YOU KNOW YOU’LL BE MISSING MY DRUNKEN POSTS BY THEN.

Tallin, Estonia

Tier One

SOUP BUFFET [$5] I love soup like I love few things on earth, and in Estonia it is apparently a THING, and we’re going to a great soup buffet for lunch

Soup and Pie at a restaurant owned by an adorable Russian couple [$6] My friend recommended this place to me specifically, because she knows any place I can get pie and soup is a place I love.

Drink a Western bar called “Tombstone” [$5] I MEAN COME ON

Tier Two

Trip to a whiskey and cigar bar [$16] A glass of whiskey and cigar is something I am going to be missing HARD by this point, I assure you

Tier Three

Dinner at Medieval merchant restaurant [$72] I’M GONNA EAT BEAR. This restaurant is the intersection of history and food, which you may note as one of my favorite things, and the meal we’re getting has a COUPLE kinds of game I’ve never experienced before.

I am also taking suggestions! And remember, I have meetups planned in London, Munich, and Paris! So let me know if you’d like to come. 

Again, thank you so much for even bothering to read all this! I love you all!!

[gguktastic]

Never let go.

I wrote this fic inspired by Nazi Germany and The Holocaust (I actually did research, people) and did research on what actions were actually crimes back then. Obviously, a German marrying a Jew and having some Sexy Times (ahem) with one is illegal, because it makes the child a, well, a Mudblood, if you will. It was also illegal for a German to support and give refuge to Jewish people in Nazi Germany. I hope @danhowellficsandimagines likes this fic that I wrote, and I’m hoping to be picked as their new admin! – Genre- Fluff. Pairing- Dan Howell x Reader. Narrator- Phil Lester. Setting- Nazi Germany. Warnings- Death.

–

The snow sprinkles down from the sky and onto the cold, hard ground. It looks hypnotising, and it is- I’ve been sat here, staring out at the snow for almost half an hour now. I am captured by its beauty, the pure, white snow falling to the gravel streets.

I nestle back even more into the crease I have formed on the backrest of my armchair, which was formed by the countless hours I sat in it, back pressed up against the rest, so that a spine-shaped crease had been formed into it. The gentle flames in the fireplace warm my cold feet, it’s steady crackling a lullaby. Breaking out of my hypnotised reverie, my attention is caught by a familiar laugh.

I sit up straight. Was it her?

'No, it couldn’t be,’ my mind whispers. 'She’s already gone, she’s never coming back.’

Being a 70-year-old, I had long ago learnt never to pay heed to what the tiny voice inside my mind said. Again, not caring what the little portion of my mind that was realistic said, I slowly rose out of my armchair, and set off in the direction of which the merry, twinkling sound of laughter came from.

Her laughter could brighten up the darkest room. The merry, tinkling and pleasant sound of her laughter put the wind chimes to shame. Her eyes, one could get lost in them. The way they would dance and twinkle in the light, they easily rivalled the beauty of the stars. Her hair made silk seem like the most coarse object on Earth.

It was such a hard job being her brother, having to protect her from the hormonal teenage boys that always tried to take her into their bed for one night, which they would then boast about to their friends.

I open the door to the her room, faded photographs tacked to the walls. It smells like her, her vanilla shampoo, which I would often use after running out of mine. I remember her always teasing me when I did borrow her shampoo for smelling like a 'woman’. I smile, remembering her mischievous grin as I groaned, exasperated.

I look around the room almost thrice, not trusting my eyesight to see her on the first go.

She wasn’t there.

Not even in the fourth time, she still wasn’t there.

But I heard her laugh come from here, didn’t I?

'You’re going crazy,’ said the little voice inside my head. 'You’re a loony old man. She’s gone, and she’s NEVER COMING BACK.’

I have had it. I sit down, heavily, on her made bed, and, as the first few tears fall down to the dusty, wooden floor, I don’t try and staunch their flow.

I start to sob.

I lay down on her bed, holding the fleece blanket close to my chest. I looked around, thousands of photographs flying past my gaze, when a particular photograph made me reach closer and pluck it off of the walls.

I felt like an intruder, disturbing the dust settled on it, and for ruining the shrine that I now treated her room as. I wiped the photograph on the leg of my trousers.

It was her, with Dan. She was grinning at the camera, her braid having come partially undone. Her left hand rested on her swollen belly, her right hand entangled with Dan’s who, for once, looked genuinely happy. I was going to be an uncle in just two months, [Y/N] and Dan parents.

Suddenly, I fall into a reverie as the dam restraining my memories breaks open, those moments swirling around in my head, begging to be remembered once again; to be cherished once more.

I oblige. // “Phil, go get the door,” [Y/N] mumbles, immersed into the plot of a new book that I had just bought her the other day, teeth slowly chewing on a honey-roasted cashew nut. It had been raining heavily, I wondered who could have knocked at this time.

“No, it’s your turn. I opened the door this morning when the postman came with a delivery for you, so it’s only fair you get the door now,” I say, immersed into the story of the newest sports scandal.

“Please, Phil,” She says, making me look up at her. She was pulling her 'please-do-what-I’m-asking-you-to-because-I-am-so-adorable’ face, under which my will crumbled. I sighed and got up from my armchair, the back rest beginning to mould itself into the shape of my spine because of the countless hours I spent sat in it.

I was, to say the least, immensely surprised to see a bloodied, 20-something man standing outside, shoulders hunched, his arm bent at a seemingly impossible angle.

“C- could you please grant me shelter? J-just for tonight, kind sir,” he says, his chocolate-brown eyes boring into my eyes, a kaleidoscope of colours, begging me to say yes.

“I- sure, come inside,” I say, opening the door wider for him to enter. His eyes turn from pleading me to being graciously grateful for my kindness. As he limps inside, the old floorboards creak, distracting [Y/N].

“Who was it, Ph- oh, oh my God!” She cries out, seeing the bloodied and injured man. She springs up to her feet, briskly walking towards him.

“Oh, dear, what has happened to you? Oh, you poor thing, come, have a seat,” she says, gently pushing him towards the armchair she had been seated at, him stretching out his feet onto the ottoman.

“Phil, please go and make some chicken soup for him, I’ll be right back,” she says, voice laced with concern, and ran up the stairs, taking them two at a time. There is a moment of silence, in which all we could hear was the opening and closing of drawers upstairs, when the young man breaks the monotony.

“Your w-wife?” He asks, voice husky. I grin at him.

“She’s my sister, dummkopf,” I say, and he chuckles.

“I’m sorry, it’s just that she’s very beautiful, and immediately thought that she was taken, because that’s what happens every time, doesn’t it?” He says, glancing towards the staircase. My gaze hardens, and my fists curl into a ball.

“Now hear me,” I say, my tone colder, grabbing his attention. “Whatever your name is-”

“I go by Daniel, but you are welcome to call me Dan.”

“Okay, so listen here, Daniel, we have granted you our hospitality, but that doesn’t mean that you try and take advantage of it by trying to get my sister into bed with you and then to boast about it to your friends like a typical German fellow. My sister is a respectable-” He interrupted me for the second time.

“I’m a Jew.”

Three words. Three words were all it took for my mouth to drop open. Without saying another word to him, I dashed up the stairs. My sister was kneeled down by the chest of drawers in my room, probably looking for some aid supplies for Dan.

Breathless, I said to her- “He’s a Jew.”

She froze. Then, without even looking at me, she said- “I don’t care whether he’s a German, a Jew, or even Adolf Hitler in disguise, we are going to protect him.”

Saying so, she walked down the stairs, various aiding supplies in her hands, soon disappearing out of my sight.

I could’ve never won that argument. I shouldn’t have even started it. // It’s been three years since Daniel James Adar Howell knocked on our door, that stormy night in the July of 1939, begging for shelter. In these three years, everything has changed.

For one thing, [Y/N] and Dan are married, meaning my beautiful sister is no more [Y/N] Adalicia Lester, she is [Y/N] Adalicia Howell. Her husband, Dan who, for the neighbours, was Daniel James Adalard Howell, was undoubtedly a bit scared of me, meaning he stayed well behind his boundaries when around me.

I had somewhat started to detest Dan after I saw him kiss my sister as she carried on her regular check of how his wounds were healing. She had just been about the bandage a small cut on his left cheek when he swiftly moved his face, cupping her cheeks with his abnormally large hands, and placed his lips upon hers. To my bitter surprise, [Y/N] kissed back. Later, as I sat reading the newspaper, they both walked up to me, hand in hand, and told me of their relationship. A year later, they got married. Another year, and [Y/N] was eight months pregnant, her and Dan preparing to be parents, while I was determined to be the best uncle a child could ask for. // “Phil, you’re finally here! Come, I want to have a whole family photo with you, Dan, and little Baby Boo here,” she said, patting her swollen belly with one hand, while she tugged me along to where the photo would be taken with the other. As soon as we took our places, a blinding flash went off and, when it subsided, all we could see were men in uniforms of the Nazi Party. I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling someone push me, praying that this was all a hallucination, but when I next opened my eyes, I was sitting in the back seat of a black car, my wrists cuffed behind my back. I looked out of the tinted windows, and saw a sight that broke my heart.

My beautiful sister was pushed to the ground, but was held up by Dan before she could fall. It was Dan’s turn to take a blow, and he fell to the ground, a large bruise probably forming on his jaw from where an officer had punched him. [Y/N]’s carefully applied eyeliner smeared onto her cheeks as her face quickly turned red and blotchy from sobbing. She was being harshly pushed into a similar car, one like I was in, but the officers were stopped by some women taking a stroll on the near path, who appeared very upset after witnessing the harsh way the Nazis treated a heavily pregnant lady. The women talked to an officer and then, probably understanding the situation, gently helped [Y/N] into the car, and gave her what appeared to be a sad smile from what I could see. Dan was pushed into the same car soon after. // Three hours of waiting later, I was finally told that I had been sentenced to 15 years in prison for assisting and providing refuge to a Jew. I was almost ecstatic at the news - I wouldn’t be sentenced to death! Perhaps, after a good argument we could prove Dan to be German. [Y/N] too would escape with 15, or, if the court was very severe, about 20 years of prison time if we failed to convince them of Dan’s nationality. If we did fail, Baby Boo would just have to grow up without knowing his true, biological father. I would never let them take my [Y/N] away from me. Never.

But that night, when I was served dinner in my cell, I heard a piece of news that split my soul into a million pieces.

“Did you know, that [Y/N] girl, who used to help cook food for prisoners when she was a little one, is being sentenced to death for marrying a Jew and being pregnant with his child?”

“When is the execution?” Someone asked.

“Tomorrow morning,” a third voice replied. “ The Jew was going to be sent to the Auschwitz concentration camp, but when he heard that his wife was being executed, he pleaded the court to let him die with his wife.”

“It’s a shame that the baby has to die, don’t you think?”

“Yes, it sure is. Poor thing didn’t get to pick its parents, did it? It isn’t it’s fault.” The voices slowly faded away as the guards walked further down the hall, but my the sound of my heartbeat grew louder, its pace quicker. I stopped the judge as he slowly walked past my cell, probably looking at the new faces he had pushed behind bars.

“Sir, am I allowed to attend the execution tomorrow?” I ask. Realisation dawned in his eyes and he nodded.

“You are her brother, no? The girl who married a Jew?” He asked, and I nodded in response.

“Ah, it is so unfair, even my daughter was executed for having an affair with a Jew, so I understand how the heart aches. Normally other prisoners aren’t allowed to watch their fellow prisoners’ execution, but for you, I’ll make a special exception. I’ll send a guard to wake you up at 3 in the morning, that’s when they will be led to the guillotines. Remember to look away when the guns are fired, it helps,” he said, kindly smiling at me, and walking away. I slumped back against the wall; there was no way I could stop this now. // My tears froze on my face as the cold air whipped my face mercilessly while [Y/N], along with Dan and Baby Boo, was marched to the elevated podium on which they were to stand.

They talked in hushed voices all the while the shooters marched into the compounds, and I read their lips form words I’ll never forget.

“[Y/N], I love you and Baby Boo. You know that, don’t you?” Dan had said.

“Dan, darling, I want you to hold my hand. Now, when the guns fire, when we die, every time, I want you to be there with me and Baby Boo, holding my hand.” [Y/N] had replied, as the shooters nervously got ready to shoot on the count of five.

“Never let go,” he said, as he tightened his grip on her hand, the ghost of a smile playing on her lips.

“Never will,” she said, as I looked down at my shoes.

The deafening sound of a hundred bullets followed and, along with Dan and [Y/N], the remains of my soul, too, crumpled, collapsed, and died. // They say that letting go of a person’s memories, the moments you shared with them, after they die, makes it easier for one. But I, oh, I will never let go.

–

I worked damn hard on this. Also I am so proud of myself for the title YAAASSS.

[thefilmfatale]

Moonlight (2016) [Movie Review]

Never has a movie been so quiet and yet so profoundly moving as Barry Jenkins’ Moonlight, the critically acclaimed adaptation of a play by Tarell McCraney. The coming-of-age story, about a young black man discovering his sexuality as he grows up in a broken home amidst a rough Miami neighborhood, is uniquely intimate yet at the same time achingly familiar. Moonlight immerses the audience in the experience of a boy beleaguered by questions about who he is and how he fits in the world, opening a window into a young life filled with neglect and isolation, but also hope and tenderness. While Moonlight’s story is, admittedly, hardly new, what’s absolutely certain is that no one has told it quite this way before. Jenkins steers this story gingerly and gracefully, assuming a protective, almost steward-like role in ensuring that Chiron’s story unfolds in a respectful yet evocative way. And he succeeds. Moonlight is quite the moving masterpiece, pulling viewers in with its commanding performances, haunting score, and arresting cinematography.  

The story of Moonlight is told in three acts, each corresponding to a stage of Chiron’s life: childhood, adolescence and, finally, adulthood. We begin with Little (played by Alex Hibbert), who appears on screen with his perpetually pursed lips and somber expression, fleeing from a horde of rambunctious boys who chase him all the way from school into a ramshackle housing project, where he seeks refuge. Little (whose nickname was given to him by his peers because of his diminutive stature) stumbles around the decrepit apartment, observing the remnants of its former occupants: crumbs of furniture, broken liquor bottles, and drug needles. In a short sequence, Jenkins vividly paints the picture of the world Chiron (Little’s given name) lives in: a neighborhood plagued by drugs, violence, and absentee parents. But while the film touches on these big picture issues, its focus is ultimately on the child caught in the middle of this storm. This painstaking attention to our protagonist’s plight is what firmly grounds Moonlight, allowing it to address serious problems like poverty and the dangers of drug use in a subtle yet provocative way that is never sententious. But at the end of the day, what makes Moonlight compelling is its subject matter: growing up as a gay black man, something we’ve never seen on screen before. There’s tremendous responsibility in taking that on, yet Jenkins rightly opts for a subtle touch, not a heavy hand, in unpacking this story.                 

Little meets Juan (played by House of Cards’ Mahershala Ali), a drug dealer with an imposing demeanor and a heart of gold, and forms an interesting bond with him. With no father figure around, Little is drawn to the paternal doting that Juan shows him, although he never says as much. The boy says very few words in the film, despite Juan’s prodding. But when he finally breaks his silence, his words reverberate through the film in such a powerful way. There is a particularly poignant exchange in the film where Little quietly asks Juan, “What’s a faggot?” To which Juan, shifting uneasily in his seat knowing the weight of the question just asked of him, slowly replies, “A faggot is... a word used to make gay people feel bad.” It’s perhaps the simplest yet most succinct definition of the slur I’ve ever heard, and that scene exemplified a master class in how to talk to a child about the complicated, ugly matters of the world. The thoughtfulness in Juan’s response and the fact that he indulged a child’s innocent question about something so controversial shattered the stereotypes many hold about the types of people who become drug dealers. There was a humanity in that depiction, a rejection of the tired, one-dimensional trope of the boorish thug we’ve seen so many times on screen before.      

Little’s relationship with Juan enrages his mother Paula (played by Naomie Harris), a working mother who also nurses a drug habit. She reacts to Juan bringing her boy home with anger and suspicion, knowing full well who he is and not wanting her child to be wrapped up in drugs like she has. While viewers will quickly realize the hypocrisy in this, Moonlight is careful in the way it chooses to paint Paula. Instead of dismissing her as one of those mere neglectful parents, Jenkins instead chooses to make her a symbol of the insidious effects drugs have on the people we love. One moment Paula is protective and nurturing of Chiron, the next she’s like a woman possessed, clawing at her teenage son’s pockets for money so she can buy more drugs. Paula is a woman whose self-image is wrapped around her being a mother, but her addiction hijacks her control. It’s absolutely heartbreaking to see a child witnessing their only parent - the one who is supposed to care for them unconditionally and provide unflinching support - slowly come undone. Moonlight highlights that sense of betrayal that we feel on behalf of the children who have to go through ordeals like these, but never in a way that seems cloying or hyperbolic.

Naomie Harris portrays Paula with the brilliance of a true artist, completely disappearing behind the sunken eyes and broken spirit of a woman with a history too tragic to even begin to unravel. Harris’ performance was one of complete abandon. The audience saw how much she surrendered herself to the material. The way her eyes flew open wildly as she spat profanities at Chiron, or the way her hate seemed to envelop her completely...Jenkins borrows a bit from German expressionism in his use of lighting to portray the duality of Paula’s character. One scene shows Paula standing in the middle of a hallway bathed in red light, her face contorted into an expression of complete disdain. It seemed to me that this was Jenkins’ way of relating to the audience what it feels like to be on the receiving end of an addict’s wrath. Harris commanded the audience’s attention and really served as the emotional tip of the spear for the film.  

In the second act of the film, we meet a teenage Chiron (Ashton Sanders), who is struggling to navigate the battlefield that is high school. Chiron is constantly hectored about what is perceived to be his effeminate manner. His classmates leer at him, while he elicits the unhelpful pitying glances of his teachers. At this point in the film, the audience has an inkling that Chiron is going through some pretty conflicted feelings in his quest for self-discovery. He knows he’s different; hell, everyone in his school treats him that way. But Chiron lacks clarity in the way many kids who are unsure of their identities experience every day, and it’s tearing him up and driving him deeper into his shell even more. But there’s a bright spot in this cruel chapter of high school: Chiron has a friend in Kevin (Jharrel Jerome), whom he’s known since he was a child. Kevin has a soft spot for Chiron, acknowledging his awkwardness playfully instead of being mean-spirited like the other kids were. In the beginning, Chiron seems to be envious of Kevin’s confidence and popularity. But this quickly dissolves into a sense of admiration, then into a shy crush.

A scene that exhibited Jenkins’ masterful restraint as director was the beach rendezvous between Chiron and Kevin. Since it was a pivotal point in the film - precipitating Chiron’s sexual awakening - this could have gone so many different, more sensational ways. Jenkins chose to treat the scene tastefully and tenderly instead, positioning the camera behind the actors so that the viewers weren’t participants in this act of intimacy but, rather, wallflowers. With the use of deliberate editing and careful mise-en-scène, we became witnesses to a pivotal, tender moment instead of a mass of ogling, peeping toms. It’s decisions like these that cemented Jenkins as an  auteur with a very distinct point of view and a subtle, but provocative touch. Few directors have exhibited the restraint necessary in telling intimate stories like these. Jenkins is one of them.  

The sweetness of the beach encounter is almost instantly snuffed in the events that follow. Chiron gets into a school brawl that sends him to jail, a story that is unfortunately all too familiar for young men growing up in neighborhoods like these. We are transported to nearly a decade later, where we meet an adult Chiron (now dubbed Black, the nickname Kevin gave Chiron). Black is a completely transformed Chiron. Gone is the lanky, awkward youth, replacing him is a muscled man sporting a golden grill, driving around in a fancy car. Black is the new Juan, and he’s now running the streets of this small Miami town. Prison time obviously contributed to this transformation, but viewers know the hardening of this once meek young man was due to a betrayal from Kevin. In Black we see the cyclical nature of life in these streets, how children of drugs go on to become drug dealers or drug users, passing through the revolving door of poverty and misfortune. And on and on.

Black gets an unexpected call from Kevin, who is now a chef at a diner a few miles outside of town. Kevin apologizes for being involved in the brawl that sent Chiron to prison, and it seems like too little too late. There’s so much tension in this scene, you could cut it with a knife. Black is a mixture of confusion, hurt, anger, indignation, but in tried and true Chiron, he is speechless at this surprise reconnection. Kevin is unchanged, the same ebullient and self-assured person Black knew in his younger years. But Black...he’s not the Chiron he used to be. He’s changed now; he’s more imposing, commanding attention and even fear. But hearing from Kevin makes Black feel like that awkward, mumbling teenager again, unsure in his own skin and always struggling to find the words. Kevin extends an invitation to drop by his diner and Black jumps at it, driving miles to see his childhood friend. The way this interaction plays out is full of gentle tenderness. It’s in these few final scenes that Jenkins reminds the audience that while Moonlight is at its core a coming-of-age tale about the troubled childhood of a gay, black man, it’s rooted in a love story that spans ages. We instantly feel that tinge of unrequited love as we watching Black and Kevin gaze longingly across the table at each other to the jukebox tune of Barbara Lewis’ “Hello Stranger”. Watching this scene beautifully unfold was a reminder that there isn’t anything out there quite like Moonlight.

It’s no easy feat, to tell a story rife with so much emotion and turmoil, and yet Barry Jenkins accomplishes just that with Moonlight. In a single story, he managed to highlight the struggles of the impoverished, the drug-addled and the world weary, all through the lens of a young, black gay man. Moonlight addresses important social issues, but what makes it effective is that it’s firmly rooted in a deeply personal story that everyone, regardless of race or gender, can relate to. All men can relate to that feeling of growing up with images of masculinity shoved down their throats; men grow up learning to bottle their emotions because they are told men don’t cry, or men don’t express themselves because that’s what women do. Anyone who’s ever grown up with drugs as a constant in their household can attest to the pernicious effect they have in destroying families and dooming children to a life of poverty and crime.

Moonlight takes all of that on, yes, but at the end of the day, it is best summarized in the scene where Mahershala Ali’s Juan is teaching Little how to swim. The water is harsh at first, even unforgiving, but as soon as Little trusts his body enough to let go, he starts to float. A child with the world seemingly on his shoulders, feeling completely weightless in the vast ocean...floating was a gift. The swimming lesson was an act of compassion from someone who understood what it means to be young and unsure of your way. It was a temporary reprieve from the burden of carrying secrets or nursing old wounds. Moonlight is a jukebox melody dedicated to those out there who are still waiting to float, a song for the black gay men out there who are still trying to find their way. It’s for the gay men and women who never saw themselves in any images on television, who grew up without fathers who could answer their gnawing questions, who have yet to experience the weightlessness to be free to be yourself.

[hermanwatts]

Guns of THE LAND THAT TIME FORGOT

By

Chris L. Adams

I love movie props; it seems like I have always had a fascination with the bits and bobs utilized by film crews to create that aura of reality on the business end of a camera.  There’s something about the things worn or carried or held by the actors that is almost magical.  I find myself studying the sets and props nearly as much as I watch the action and listen to the dialogue.  Who wouldn’t love to own a coveted pair of Dorothy’s red slippers, or have a vintage 1977 Stormtrooper helmet sitting on a shelf?  Many Burroughs fans enjoy seeing props from ERB movies when they come available; I’ve seen several items in recent years from the movie, John Carter that I’d love to have sitting next to my stacks of Burroughs novels.

The costumes and props are essential, really, to effectively tell the story that the writers, actors, directors, key grips and gaffers, etcetera are trying to convey.  Without them, it’s just people talking.  But stick a fancy costume on one, a sword in the fist of another, or toss a cool-looking, vintage currier’s pouch over the shoulder of someone walking along looking otherwise normal?  Now we’re talking.  Now, it’s getting interesting.

Original production props are able to put us in touch with a movie in a tactile manner that one doesn’t experience just by watching the movie.  Watching Glen Larson’s 1978 Battlestar Galactica series with an original, life-sized suit of Cylon armor standing in the corner would make for a far different experience than that of sitting in the living room floor in your pajamas watching with a coat rack in that same corner, am I right?

In a continuance of the theme I utilized for my article in ERBAPA #143, ” A Message in a . . . bottle?” –where we examined the German gas mask canister utilized by Bowen Tyler–I thought it might be interesting to dive into the prop guns utilized in filming the 1975 film, The Land that Time Forgot.  Although the film is replete with the brandishing of arms and the spitting of rapid-fire lead into various rubber dinosaurs, there aren’t as many different models as one might think.

[Note that I won’t be discussing the sub’s torpedoes in this article as they would be considered more a projectile than a firearm.  Although, technically, I suppose the torpedo tubes might be considered barrels!  Still, we won’t dive into that, although it sounds fun.]

The Deck Gun

The biggest gun brought to bear in the film is obviously the submarine’s deck gun.  Deck guns on submarines were mostly intended to shoot down aircraft (spotter planes were the bane of subs in the days before the invention of sonar) and therefor are typically of an anti-aircraft design.  But, they were also utilized to defend the sub when top-side from enemy vessels, or to finish off a wounded, enemy ship–saving the limited number of torpedoes in the sub’s arsenal for bigger fish.

But in the case of the U-boat U-33, we see this weapon being used in a role that might be unique to the movie adaptation of the story written by Edgar Rice Burroughs–that of blowing away a pair of horned and frilled Styracosauruses that should have long been extinct.  It’s an unfortunate scene, actually, given that these herbivores weren’t threating anyone and is probably akin to shooting elephants with Howitzers.  Good, ole Hollywood, though; gotta love it.

In researching this deck gun, I find that there are some movie-gun nerds who believe the cannon used in the film was an actual German 7.7cm L/35 Flak 16 anti-aircraft gun, built by the firm, RheinMetall who are renown for many famous firearms designs.  But I’m not so sure.  To me, the barrel on this cannon looks a bit too long, although the conical pedestal looks right.

Still others posit that it was instead a British 3″ 23 Caliber deck gun that was used in the film.  This makes more sense to me, as the film was shot in the famous Shepperton Studios of England.  It seems more likely to find a source for a movie gun of this sort in the same country where the movie was being filmed, versus a rare piece from a different country, in this case, Germany.  But not impossible, I admit; it’s feasible that a museum loaned a German L/35 to the studio.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to run down any solid information on this piece.  The scenes of the deck gun in the movie are either too dark or too far away for me to be sure.

The Burp Gun

Germany has the distinction of being the first to field a “burp” gun on a battlefield with their famous Bergmann MP-18 (Machinen Pistole Model 1918).  The design of this early submachinegun was so ahead of its time that its influence can be found on models up into the 1960s.  When Hugo Schmeisser began his ground-breaking design he chose what was, at the time, a relatively new cartridge which had only been around since 1902–that being the 9mm Parabellum (9×19) of Luger fame (more on the Luger later).  This cartridge has proved to have a greater longevity than even the Mp-18 as it is still with us today, being the most popular cartridge, I’d say, in the entire world.

The choice of placing a submachinegun that wasn’t fielded until 1918 in a film that takes place in 1916 is, of course, an anachronism.  But, this is Hollywood we’re talking about (I use that word figuratively; literally, I’m referring to the entire movie industry).  For those who know of the MP-40 (Machinen Pistole Model 1940) they might recall that this equally famous machine pistol was used in the opening scene of Indiana Jones, which takes place in 1936 — four years before the MP-40 was introduced.  Movie magic!   Still, it looked cool–which was the goal, after all.

Note the “snail drum” magazine sticking out of the side of the Bergmann.  This was actually borrowed from the Luger (yes, that name keeps coming up, and we’re getting to it–I promise!).  This is a 32-round magazine developed for the P.08 “Artillery” Luger to give it a bump in round count.  It was actually quite brilliant to adopt both the Luger’s magazine and cartridge during the development of this little sub-gun.

The Revolver

As the British wait near the sub’s hatch, Bradley can be seen holding a revolver whose name is steeped in British tradition–the famed Webley top-break revolver.  Referring again to Indian Jones, most might recall that Indie was fond of these British top-breaks.

The Rifle

The U-33 is also fitted out with an arsenal of Mauser Gewehr 1898 rifles.  It is an example of one of these work horses of the German forces that Bowen Tyler brings to bear against everything from t-rexes to cave men.

A shame, that last!  Mausers are nice rifles; built with that old-world style craftsmanship you just don’t see nowadays.  I’d love to scour the cliff tops of Caspak for Bowen’s rifle, and set it next to his German gas mask cannister, should I happen upon it.

The Luger

Finally!  There are many various models of the Luger pistol, some rarer than others.  The four-inch barreled “Infantry” model is perhaps the most common, while the “Navy” model is on the scarcer side, most of these latter possessing a six-inch barrel.  Somewhere in the middle of the scarcity barometer we have the famed “Artillery” model which had an eight-inch barrel and came standard with a removable butt-stock/holster combo and is often found with the aforementioned snail drum magazine (which had its own leather holster).  It is this latter with which we find the crew of the U-33 armed to their veritable teeth.

In the movie, these were all equipped with the standard 8-round, wood-bottom magazine instead of the 32-round snail drum as seen below.  Note the board stock, with attached holster.  This is kicking it old school, folks.  They just don’t make ’em like this anymore.  I’m guessing that the studio was able to round up a couple of these for the film after not having any luck scavenging up Naval Lugers, which would have definitely been more accurate.

Although still a rare bird, P.08 Artillery Lugers are found in many-more times the quantities of the Naval variety (the Model P.04).  Below is an example of what the crew of the sub would most likely have historically been armed with.  Alas, these are so rare because so many of them went to the bottom.

Thank you all for allowing me to ramble about my fascination for military history and small arms.  Hopefully, this has replaced some of the mystery with a little bit of historical knowledge.

Guns of THE LAND THAT TIME FORGOT published first on https://sixchexus.weebly.com/

[68ejgppd-blog]

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[nadiafayrosemelham-blog]

I’d like to say I’m generally a lucky person. Nothing too misfortunate has ever happened during my 23 years of existence, I try to stay an honest and good human as much as possible, I don’t tempt the devil too often, and I’m a big believer in karma. What goes around comes around right? I’m basically a Buddhist.

Let me just go back to the first sentence of the last paragraph there, where I’ve written ‘I’m generally a lucky person’, and finish this sentence with, in Cambodia I was NOT a lucky person! My Buddhist belief is slightly wavering as I sit on my plane that can’t leave Cambodia quick enough, and think to myself… surely I’ve don’t nothing TOO dramatic to deserve THAT?

At the same time, I’ve recently adapted a new life motto thanks to one of my favourite people in life, the inspirational Lisa Wiltshire. It started out a few months back as ‘live a life worth writing a novel about’ and currently stands a little closer to ‘live a life worth writing a series about’. So on the other shoe (not currently wearing shoes because who keeps their shoes on during a flight), I also believe everything happens for a reason! Very firm firm believer in that one, not questioning this motto at all!

So let me tell you about my memorable trip to Cambodia. I’ll also point out that I’ve used the word memorable, because memorable is a word you use when it wasn’t great, and it wasn’t shit, but you just won’t ever forget it!

It started very innocently with my time in Siem Reap. I took a visit to the Angkor Wat Temples which are absolutely amazing, and wandered around the night market in the evenings. It was drama free and very chilled. I think the starting point in my series of unfortunate events begins with my night bus from Siem Reap to Sihanoukeville, where I was then due to board a ferry to the picturesque island of Koh Rong.

The night bus was a weird hotel bus where you literally share a single bed with a stranger (word of warning you could NEVER travel SEA if you are overweight.. sorry to crush any hopes and dreams but there are just too many tight spaces to deal with and it ain’t gonna happen). I was lucky enough to be put next to a nice young Canadian gal and we both pretty much slept the whole way. At one point I woke up to the bus driver changing the front tyre (NOTE: I think this could be where the series of unfortunate events begins). Not sure how long we were there for but obviously a while as the bus arrived late and I managed to miss my ferry to the island.

I headed to the Buva Sea Ferry office to get on board the next, and seeing as Asia is just organised chaos anyway, I chicken scratched the ferry time off my ticket so I didn’t have to pay more. I had already mentally blamed the receptionist from the hostel for this if anyone was to question my ticket. Soon enough I was on the list for the 11am ferry and was waiting eagerly by the pier. By 12.30 a substitute ferry finally rolled in to take us to the island, as apparently seas were too rough for our small speed ferry.

Sitting front and centre in the ferry, I was dreaming of the white sandy beaches I would soon be lounging upon. As I gazed ahead into the blue sea, I could see waves the size of Africa, which were soon met with the sound of the motor cutting. One giant wave came over the front of the boat and under the front doors into the cabin. Straight after the first wave, a second GIANT wave came rolling over the front of the boat, in through the windows, and absolutely SOAKED the front two rows including lil’ old me. Just to clarify I’m talking a tsunami style wave, and a whole ocean of water inside the boat.

Now has anyone ever told you to make sure you keep all your valuables close to you when travelling? Of course they have, it is absolutely drilled in to you by anyone who cares, and yes of course I had all of my valuables with me including my new MacBook Air and my IPhone 6. I quickly headed straight to the back of the boat where I pulled out my laptop and phone. Water pouring out of both, I wiped them down with a cloth of some sort but my hopes had pretty much been washed away with that wave.

After arriving to the island I managed to buy 2 kilos of rice off an elderly woman for $2, based on the promise that I would eventually return it to her to use for her cooking. Needless to say I was not eating at her restaurant during my stay in Koh Rong. I briefly attempted to save the electronics but the laptop was 100% fried, and the phone only half touch responsive. I held out hope that I could get the phone fixed when I eventually landed in Phnom Penh.

On the ferry, I met a few other girls who were also headed to a secluded hostel on the island called ‘Suns of Beaches’ which was apparently so super chill that you had to take a long tail boat to get there. After climbing off the ferry slightly defeated by the rough ride, we soon found out that there were no boats running to this part of the island due once again to the rough waters. So now I’ve got a fried laptop, a phone that barely works, I’m feeling like a broken woman from the rough ferry ride, AND I can’t get to my hostel (which I’m secretly happy about because I don’t want to look at another boat). I was the first to cut my losses, and soon enough we all decided to check into a hostel in the central area of the island.

We went out for a few drinks to soothe our souls, and eventually headed to bed in our dorm room. I buddied up with a lovely German girl, who I will here on refer to as Germany, not in a racist way, but just because I like that name (her real name was Mirjam). She would be my new partner in crime over the coming days. The first hour of attempted sleep in my dorm bed involved itching, rolling around, applying insect repellant, and giving up on the cause. The following hours of my night involved finding a late night restaurant to sit at and make use of their wifi (on Germany’s iPad that she had so kindly let me borrow because remember my electronics hate me). By the time morning came around I had lodged my travel insurance claim, googled fancy hotels to stay in, had finished my book, and managed to photograph the sunrise! Maybe things weren’t so bad after all!

That day Germany and I enjoyed the gorgeous beaches, and found a double room next door that was clean and perfect for $10 a night. On our 3rd day Miriam convinced me to hike to Suns of Beaches (the hostel we were meant to be staying at), which was about an hours walk from the main village. The first 45 minutes were so beautiful that I wouldn’t even call it a hike. We were just wandering along the beach bare feet with huge backpacks on our back.

In the last what should have been 15 minutes however, things took a turn for the worst. We came to the final section of the hike where you walk through a trail in the jungle. Part way in the trail split in two, and as we stood there wondering which way to go, Miriam said left and I said right. Left we went, as I’d decided I didn’t always need to be right (excuse the pun)! The path started to look super dodgy and I questioned the decision endlessly as we pressed forward under Germany’s lead. After climbing over fallen trees and manoeuvring over boulders we came to a second path, which also split both left and right. Once again Germany chose left, and I chose right. Germany pulled out her frozen map and convinced me once again that left was the way – don’t trust a German with a broken map.

As we wandered down the dry path, about half an hour later we sighted a wooden hut in the distance. That must be it we shouted for joy! But as we neared closer it was actually just a locals house surrounded by chickens, stray dogs, week old garbage and with an entire family perched up on the front verandah. We tried to ask for directions but needless to say, we were soo far out of the tourist zone that their English was definitely not permitting. We stood there for about 10 minutes while a pre-teen boy gave us false hope, staring into his phone in a manner that turned out to be aimless. ‘Maps’ I said pointing to his phone, hoping he would pull up a google map and show us where we were, but that would have been wayyyy too good to be true. He just shrugged his child sized shoulders and gazed up at us with lost eyes.

At this point I took charge as I looked around with no sign of anything marine. ‘We’re going back to the second fork in the path and headed right’. Miriam hesitantly followed me back along the long path we had wandered, and we continued to the right. Did I already point out that we’re in Cambodian heat carrying our entire life on our back? Well we were… but soon enough we came to the waters edge, and simultaneously to a sign that read ‘SUNS OF BEACHES’. Thank the bloody lord for that!

Stumbling up to the hostel check-in area, we told the young Scottish chap we were there to check in and stated our names. Miriam had been emailing them on our behalf during my unplanned technology cleanse, and she had informed them know we would be arriving. Good ole Scotland sat perched up behind the counter and exclaimed ‘I’ve got one bed for Miriam, and no beds for Nadia.’ Ohhh.. perfect! So you’ve got no beds then? ‘Nope, no beds tonight. But your welcome to sleep in a hammock for free. Or go head to toe with Miriam!’ Oh wonderful, the curse of Cambodia continues.

That night we went swimming with the bioluminescent plankton once the sun had set, and watched the water light up around us as we splashed about. What a gorgeous sight it was, and one of the reasons I was determined to go to the island. Once bed time arrived we ended up settling for the head to toe option, and arranged ourselves on the bottom bunk. At about 4am I awoke feeling pretty ‘shitty’ if ya know what I mean, and vomited my life away. Each hour I awoke to visit the bathroom, then resumed head to toe positioning. Of course I had managed to pick up a bug or gastro or whatever it wanted to call itself as it slowly consumed me from the inside.

When morning came I took the first long tail boat back to the main village area, where I would stay a final night back in the double room to sort myself out before the traumatic ferry ride back to the mainland. That morning I’d put on fresh clothes in an attempt to make myself feel wonderful, and tried to convince myself I would make it through the long tail trip without pooping my pants. After heading down to the boat, I soon discovered it was anchored 30m out to sea, and we had to wade over to it with our bags above our head. By this point I really would not have been phased if I dropped my entire bag in the ocean. In fact I probably would have just left it there if I had. But nevertheless I made it to the boat with my fresh clothes soaked and my belly hating life, and my bag made it too.

Soon the boat took off and I realised that once again, I was actually sitting at the front of the boat. Wonderful! I warned the lad next to me that sitting there was probably a terrible mistake as I was currently a series of unfortunate events, and he laughed it off with a slightly scared look left on his face once he realised how serious I was.

I made it back to the main village, and again waded through the breast deep water with my bags above my head. I checked back into the double room and came across the pals I’d made a few days ago, ready to entertain them with my stories. Andrew (aka. England) got a real kick out of my misfortune, and showed me a little sympathy by allowing me the share his laptop and indulge in a movie for some entertainment in my sick state. He fetched me water and noodles, and kept me entertained with his dodgy English humour. Did I mention that on this afternoon I also managed to disable my phone by tapping excessively at the screen to work and entering the pin incorrectly one too many times? So my phone now says ‘connect to iTunes’, but I can’t do that because my computer is fried isn’t it! So the comforting thought of still having the contents of my phone is now shattered as I realise I will have to factory reset the phone after fixing the screen. WHAT-IS-TECHNOLOGY?

The next day I sat at the dodgiest pier of the four on the island with my stomach feeling just as dodgy. England had come along to send me off, and we joked about how the tiny boat that looked like it held two people at the end of the pier would be my boat. Safe to say that god damn boat was indeed my Buva Sea Ferry. On board I climbed, or rather leaped as the boat bounced around everywhere, and stood there trying to calculate which seat would be best to sit in, in the case of another rogue wave.

The boat took off and I can 100% say it was the most outrageous experience yet. It would be no exaggeration to say that I would pay a lot of money at Sydney Harbour to experience that same boat ride. The only difference is that I would receive a life jacket and a seat belt, and the boat would be labelled ‘The JetSpinner’. I sat there gripping at the handles tighter then mum used to grip the car handles when I was a learner driver, and thinking to myself, it’s been a nice life! I think I made eye contact with every single person on that boat, just to check if they were filled with the same fears as I was. My previous dramatic ferry ride had taught me that when the motor cuts, it is NOT a good sign, and by the time I could sight land in the distance I think the motor had cut about 16 times and we had become proper airborne at least 5 of those times. There were 2 vomits, 12 shaken passengers, and 24 wobbly knees onboard.

I sat at the cafe I was due to be collected from, and recovered from the experience whilst mentally preparing for my bus ride ahead. As pickup time came close I confirmed with a few too many waitstaff that I would definitely be getting collected from that cafe. A feeling in my belly told me things were not improving, and I asked one final person about the pickup, who responded ‘Oh, the driver has already been and collected everyone!’ Of course he bloody has! With a few minutes to spare, I hopped on the back of a motorbike and headed for the bus departure point, where a phone call had been made to ask the driver to wait for me. Finally I was on the bus, and NOTHING ELSE COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG.

I made it to Phnom Penh, where I continued to suffer gastro from my Koh Rong visit. I took my phone to the night market where it was fixed within 15 minutes, and then managed to lock myself out of every bank account and email account I own by entering incorrect passwords. Touch recognition on iPhones is a blessing and a curse, as if I would remember the 9 million different passwords I’ve got for each account.

To be fair apart from the above, Phnom Penh was mostly drama free – and I was soon headed to the airport to take my flight to Indonesia and leave this cursed land of Cambodia! Very conscious of how my luck had been panning out, I decided to leave for the airport excessively early. I sat, waiting for the check in counter to open, and when it did, I jumped in the line. After about a 40 minute wait to the front (and after feeling very content in the line about my luck improving), I was faced by a Cambodian man. He asked for my departure flight details from Indonesia and I informed him I was yet to book a flight, but was only staying a week or so. The kind sir proceeded to tell me that he was unable to check me in for the flight until I had a departure flight FROM Indonesia. So let me just clarify this for you quickly… I’m due to fly Cambodia to Indonesia, with a layover in Malaysia, and this dude cares about my DEPARTURE flight from INDONESIA?…. Excuse me, but why on God’s earth do YOU Cambooodia, care when or as a matter of fact, IF I ever leave Indonesia?

I’ve learnt mostly by observation that you will get absolutely nowhere by arguing or back and forth-ing with anyone in Asia, so I accepted defeat and stepped to the side in order to book my flight leaving Indonesia. I had one hour to book the flight which seemed easy enough, but of course with Nadia’s lucky this wasn’t the case. I could feel myself floating further and further up shit creek with a dodgy airport wifi connection and a ticking clock staring me in the face. Time passed and the check-in line slowly disappeared. I literally had 4 minutes left to check in, and I looked at the Cambodian man with the saddest puppy dog eyes you’ve ever seen in your life, thinking to myself he is for sure a dad or an uncle or at least has a bloody soul! He took a look at my eyes slowly filling with tears from the past two weeks, and said ‘Well, you did TRY to book a flight so I’ll check you in. But just make sure you book a departure flight before you get to Indonesia or you might have trouble.’ I thanked him one too many times not really knowing what the hell for, and sprinted to my gate to get on that god damn plane.

I was pretty much the last person to board, and I could see my row up ahead with two people filling the seats next to mine. In front, row 25 sat entirely empty from A through C, and I said to myself “Fuck it!” I sat in that row all by myself and spread out across the three seats absolutely stoking the blazing fire that was my fate whilst the wheels smoothly lifted off the tarmac. I could practically feel the Cambodian curse being lifted as we ascended further into the air, and I could finally rest easy.

Summary of unfortunate events:

Bus arrived late to Sihanoukeville and missed my ferry

Managed to board a later ferry involving tsunami waves, wet bums, and fried electronics

Couldn’t get to secluded island hostel due to rough seas

Bed at substitute hostel filled with biting bugs = sleepless night

Got lost in the Cambodian jungle with no ocean in sight in attempt to find original hostel

Caught a gastro bug after swimming with the plankton in the lush Koh Rong water

Bounced around for an hour on return ferry ride to mainland as surrounding passengers chucked up and winced around me

Missed pick up to deliver me to my bus to Phnom Penh

Just about missed my flight out of Cambodia due to weird Cambodian airport regulations that I still don’t understand

(Hold tight for my next post, to see if the Cambodian curse really had been lifted, or if it was just the altitude playing havoc on my senses.)

[anakirie-blog]

American Voices Project

                                            By: Ana Kirie 

State of Greece Entry 1: 1945

Mr. Mechales immigrated to the US in 1945. He wanted nothing more than to escape the poverty stricken country at the time and to be able to live a good and respectful life. During this time in Greece there was poverty, lack of jobs and political unrest. In addition, this was occurring at the end of World War II, the year after the Germans left the country in bad condition. The year 1940 was  know as the axis occupation of Greece. Nazi Germany had invaded Greece to assist their ally’s, Italy, also being at war with them. During the year 1945, when he immigrated to the US, it was the end of World War II, where islands were surrendered.

Immigration Entry 2: The Journey 

Immigrating from Greece to the US came with hardships but also brought prosperity as well.  His extended family was also very happy about his decision to move. Traveling with his mother and Father, he adds others “wished they could come along with us.” Coming to the US with “no money and just the clothes they had on”, they lived with an aunt, uncle and three cousins in a 3 bedroom flat on the north side of Chicago. Upon arrival he adds that he, “totally did not speak any English at all. He was the only one is his high school that was not able to speak English.

Occupying Forces of Germany Entry 3: Survival and Conditions

During the time Mr. Mechales immigrated, the county of Greece was in bad condition. He says, “The German army pretty much overwhelmed the entire European continent. Greece then of course was subjugated to Germans, and how we were able to survive in an atmosphere of hunger and total desolation.” In these extreme conditions, to be able to survive and keep striving  to accomplish your personal goal is something to be mentioned and shows the importance how er should commend  the Greek immigrants for their accomplishments.  

The Transition Entry 4: Beginning 

Before leaving Greece, Mr. Mechaels was schooling as a freshman in high school. When he came to the US, he was placed in sophomore year. He says that ,”in a space three to four months, I learned how to speak English and was able then to be a part of the division in my class just like any other person in that particular school.” The only help he received during this major transition was a family on his father’s side with a few other family members, but no help from any of the Greek Orthodox churches or the vast network of Greeks. Asking if the majority of Greeks he had first met here were helpful during this time, he responds, “I would say that they- I can’t say that they were not helpful, but I know one thing, they were very busy to help out, because it was the end of the war, there were people coming back from the war in Europe and the majority of the people were very busy with their families. Other immigrants were treated about the same as the others but in a way distant.” Having to learn a entirely new language and adapt to your new everyday surroundings can either make the transition from countries difficult or as smooth as can be expected. 

His American Dream Entry 5: Living The Dream

My theory is that Greek immigrants were very successful in living the American Dream. From my perspective, growing up in a family where my grandparents were immigrants and being surrounded by the Greek culture my entire life, all I see is prosperity.

Mr. Mechales agrees by saying, “From my experience I would say that it is very true. Greek immigrants are successful in living the American dream.” Also including that there was a very high percentage of Greek immigrants that came during the major wave in the 1960’s that achieved success. Everyone he knew that came over during this wave that did well. Mr. Mechales is also a very successful CPA with his own firm. Asking the question of how he manage to get there and the path he took to his success he answers, “First of all, through a lot of education to get to that point. Second by being in the position of knowledge to develop certain type of client all that like the way that I conducted the bi practice of CPA. Not only is being a CPA of yours own firm a major success for himself but not unusual being your own boss in this culture. “Some of them chose the path of owning their own businesses. Many Greek immigrants have been successful in the real estate business. In the construction business. In the trucking business. There some Greeks who are very successful CPA’s and now there are others who have been successful as attorneys. The ones that have been very successful in one particular business, is the restaurant business.  Greek immigrants by far have excelled in the restaurant business.”

Entry 6: It’s What They Knew 

“Call it a Greek immigrant story, diner version. Many Greeks who came to this country from the 1920s on found jobs in restaurants, coffee shops and luncheonettes in New York City; it’s what they knew.”

_http://www.nj.com/jerseysbest/2015/11/njs_best_diner_why_are_there_are_so_many_greek-own.html _

Greek Immigrants Entry 7: Successful or Not 

“I don’t know of any Greek immigrants that have not been successful.” As mentioned before, the Greek immigrants were very successful in living the american dream. He mentions that some had chosen the path to work for others, then having their own business. He says that, “It’s not in the Greek spirit to work for others. The Greek spirit says  that it is best for the for the Greek to be its own boss.” 

My family being super rich in the Greek culture notice this success for the Greek Immigrants. Wether its eating at a Greek restaurant  or having coffee after church with all the older people, we are faced with hard evidence that the community, mostly immigrants in this case, have done very well for themselves.

A Success Story Entry 8: Carvel Ice Cream

In 1910, a man named Tom Carvel (Athanassios Karvela) immigrated to the U.S. At 26 years of age and traveling with family of 8, including himself, was falsely diagnosed with a fatal condition and ended up in Westchester, New York. With a startup of $15, that was borrowed by his fiance, he decided to start selling ice cream out of his truck. After having a flat tire and losing electricity, he took his business to a parking lot outside of a pottery store. After selling his entire stock and using the pottery's stores electricity for 2 years, he decided to buy the store and make his business more permanent. That small shop in 1910 today is a well know brand that does very well and is one of our nations largest ice cream franchises. 

Entry 9: It’s A Fact

“According to a report from the Fiscal Policy Institute’s Immigration Research Initiative, using data from the U.S. Census Bureau, there are 75,000 Greek immigrants in the U.S. labor force. And of those, 16 percent are small-business owners. This tops immigrants from Israel at 13 percent, Syria at 12 percent, and Iran at 12 percent.”

https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2014/08/which-us-immigrants-end-up-becoming-small-business-owners/431241/

Entry 10: Current status 

In the big picture, Mr. Mechales has achieved his american dream and currently still is. Still having this most accomplished business he began, he fulfills his own beliefs that the Greek spirit is to be your own boss, and not to work for others. Not only did he receive good education when he first got to the US, but being able to adapt to the area and learn the English language quickly, were obviously beneficial in getting him to where he is today. He is proud of how he got to where he is now and the life he lives in this country. 

Words Cited:

Vasilogambros, Matt, and Stephanie Stamm. “Which U.S. Immigrants End up Becoming Small-Business Owners?” The Atlantic, Atlantic Monthly Group, 27 Aug. 2014, www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2014/08/which-us-immigrants-end-up-becoming-small-business-owners/431241/. Accessed 3 Oct. 2017.

Genovese, Peter. “N.J.’s Best Diner: Why Are There so Many Greek-owned Diners?” NJ, New Jersey On-Line, 29 Nov. 2015, www.nj.com/jerseysbest/2015/11/njs_best_diner_why_are_there_are_so_many_greek-own.html. Accessed 3 Oct. 2017.

“Italian and Greek Immigration.” U.S. Immigration and Migration Reference Library, edited by Lawrence W. Baker, et al., vol. 2: Vol. 2: Almanac, UXL, 2004, pp. 455-483. Gale Virtual Reference Library, go.galegroup.com/ps/i.do?p=GVRL&sw=w&u=winn16583&v=2.1&id=GALE%7CCX3436800034&it=r&asid=5c634e699ab7be12afc261578f7a0a2f. Accessed 15 Sept. 2017.

Pappas, Gregory. “Famous Greek Immigrants: Tom Carvel: Inventor, Innovator, American Icon and Ice Cream King.” Pappas Post, Gregory Pappas, 23 Mar. 2015, www.pappaspost.com/famous-greek-immigrants-tom-carvel-inventor-innovator-and-american-icon/. Accessed 2 Oct. 2017.