#almost finished and it’s exciting and also a little silly but im proud of myself

[minimujina]

the stimmies and the shimmies !

hi i wrote a self-indulgent drabble about kuni (wanderer) where u do some happy stimming and he wants to know why!!

ᴄᴡ. written with a neurodivergent reader in mind, but anyone can read and relate as stimming is not at all exclusive to neurodivergency :] i do not at all wish to encourage harmful stereotypes or put this behavior on a pedestal—this is simply a silly happy drabble building from my own personal experiences and i wanted to share it for anyone to enjoy!!

ᴀ/ɴ. happy flappy happy flappy flip flop flappy pap :D also this actually turned out to be really cute and doesnt only have to do with stimming—its very fluffy and funny and i really like the dialogue!! not super proofread and im very proud of myself for not hoarding this in my drafts for months!! im really happy that it only took me an evening to write this!! WEEEE

“…why are you flapping your hands?”

you stopped moving abruptly, staring at the wanderer with a blank face, expression unreadable.

it took you a moment to get the words out (because he was staring at you expectantly with his arms crossed, and that was rather intimidating), but you managed to squeak them by after some self-encouragement.

“well… im happy.”

kunikuzushi seemed to scrutinize you for a moment, and you were afraid that this had only given him another reason to dislike you. ��happy? why would you be happy? i hate happy people.”

(…that’s what you imagined he would say.)

though, you obviously didn’t know him perfectly well, because what he said next was far from the venomous reply you’d feared.

he simply hummed, gaze softening a bit. “alright then.”

alright then.

you had finished your happy flapping due to the interruption, no longer feeling the urge to happy flap, but you still felt calm and content, and maybe even more so thanks to his almost… sweet response. sweet for him, at least.

the expression on his face made you feel a bit warm all of a sudden—he wouldn’t stop looking at you. it wasn’t hard to tell that his eyes were boring into your own even if you weren’t meeting them yourself. you felt like a little pot of boiling water under his gaze. a little soup. a soup of happy and confused feelings. happy soup.

what was it that had made you so very happy, kunikuzushi wondered? he kept replaying the past couple minutes in his head, trying to remember what had occurred just before this, but the only pictures in his head were of you, all bouncy and flappy and so very pleased.

perhaps he should’ve just asked you, he mused.

perhaps he would just ask you.

“what made you so happy?” he inquired, as blunt and flat as ever. but you knew him just enough to know that he would never ask such a thing if he didn’t really care—and the tone of his voice was irrelevant. he always sounded rather uninterested with anything.

you grinned, meeting his gaze. it looked as though you were holding yourself back, buzzing with a chained excitement again.

“kuni, i was happy because of you!”

a most incredulous expression crossed the wanderer’s face.

“me?”

what could kunikuzushi have done to make anyone so happy?

he studied your smile, your hands, your eyes—and he could not figure out how he could possibly be a reason that all of those lovely features of yours contained such absolute joy.

you nodded confidently. “do you want me to explain?” you could tell from kuni’s horrified expression that, firstly, he did not really believe you. and secondly, he held a deep-seated loathing for himself, which was why he could not believe you. he could not accept that there was anything good about himself.

“knock yourself out,” he murmured, still seeming dazed.

you motioned for him to sit next to you, looking like you would start jumping up and down at any second. seriously, why were you so happy?

“i was just thinking about how far you’ve come, kuni,” you began. you already looked like you were in the middle of one of your long spiels that the wanderer was so often obliged to listen to. “and it makes me really happy.”

he had to hold himself back from scoffing—not because he thought anything bad about you, but because he thought badly about himself.

“remember when nahida first made you come work with me in the nursery?” you grinned. “you were so mad. it was hilarious.”

kunikuzushi averted his gaze to the ground with a grumble, suddenly finding his shoes very interesting.

“okay, i was not mad.”

“yes, yes you were! oh my archons, you were so grumpy, kuni! you-”

“no, you are so delusional,” he retorted. “i was just-”

“grumpy?”

“no.”

“ooohhh, yes, kuni was feeling a bit grumpy, i think. you were a little grumper.”

the wanderer opened his mouth to retaliate—but he faltered, a new hint of amusement smothering his gaze.

“…you are incredibly annoying, did you know that?”

in any other situation you would’ve taken that very literally, but the faintest of smiles itched at his lips, and you knew for certain that that was his way of conceding.

you probably should’ve stopped there, but something inside you just couldn’t continue in life without saying this one last thing.

you feigned pity with a pout, widening your eyes and clasping your hands.

“...did nahida forget to give you a juicebox that day?”

kunikuzushi thrust his hat onto your head, shoving you and your hysterical laughter aside. if you could’ve seen from under the big ass hat, his glowing cheeks and sheepish grin likely would have sent you into a fit, and the wanderer just couldn’t have that.

“i am so funny,” you cackled, very obviously pleased with yourself (but you were still trapped under his hat, so your voice was very muffled, and it was much more difficult for him to take you seriously this way).

“yeah, yeah. whatever helps you sleep at night, flappy.”

“flappy?” you knocked off the hat with one sweep, an incredulous smile dancing on your lips. “you jerk!”

“yes, i know.”

“oh, you are so mean,” you grumbled, though your expression said the exact opposite.

“i’m well aware, flappy.”

“you just make me wanna—wanna—oh, why i oughta-”

“oh, please, do tell!” kunikuzushi drawled, resting his chin in his palm.

when you couldn’t seem to say anything at all, mouth agape, he closed it for you—pushing your jaw up with his pointer finger—grinning smugly like he always did.

“as auntie nahida says,” the wanderer murmured, “if you have nothing nice to say…don’t say anything at all.”

and with that, he grabbed his hat from the floor, exiting the nearly empty nursery with a dramatic flourish that was so characteristic of him. you were left sitting there for a few minutes, aghast at what had just happened, until you came to your senses.

you did a bit of happy flapping after that.

thank you for reading :)

[conivolos]

pokes head in here. hello coni. pls throw your fics at me i want to read them. what are you most proud of. what are u working on right now. what do you want me to read. i want it all hand it over. (i am being genuine but also silly sjdfklsdj what are u writing i am so curious :eyes:)

adsjaksf hiya!!! :D

and yeah!! i do have a couple of wips i want to rant about kajfhkjah

the first ima shout about (it also might be my favorite but shhh) is a 3rd life renaissance faire au :D its currently treebark and dogwarts centric and is quite literally full of half formed sentences and contextless dialogue, but theres three pages of worldbuilding and plot and im really happy with it so far :D, rens the king of dogwarts (the kingdom the faires set in), and the dogwarts army are, well, the knights of dogwarts. and you know martyn's creeper prank? he makes goose noises instead cause its hilarious and it still scares the crap out of everyone but scott asjkjafh. and ima stop there i dont want to reveal any more cause spoilers askjfhas

another wip is post-canon joel's empires s2 finale!! he is regretting a lot of things and theres three more joels than usual. its likely going to be multichap and full of angst (if i can actually make angst without adding puns into it asjksajfh) with a happy (?) ending :D

a third im hyped about is a waterpark au of sorts, based off of ethos old turf war minigame, The RipZone!! its mostly mycelium resistance centric, purely because i have more of a grasp on writing them than the hep. im not quite sure where to plots going for this one, but i have just enough planned out to be insane about it askdjfaskjfh. theyre highschool ago and its set in australia, at the end of the year, so its the beginning of summer and schools just let out (prime waterpark time babayyy)

and the last is another limited life coral kids fic woooo!! the working title is 'whats your favorite constellation?' and i feel it captures the vibes im going for surprisingly well. its barely written and im hoping it wont be as long as the last lmao, im thinking only about 1k words, and it also wont be explicitly romantic. im playing off of the concept of giving each winner being assigned / associated with a symbol (sun, stars, moon, etc.), and the general fandom confusion on what to give to martyn. and wait i wrote a lil synopsis thing for this like two days ago hold on

'centred on scott and martyn, ties tower has just (or is being) constructed, scott's built them a base, the chaos of bread bridge hasnt quite begun. and, while laying on their beds under the sky, scott talks about the stars above them, lamenting about a past life. martyn and scott discuss the dilemma that is the death games. scott doesnt want to win again and they wonder if martyn's going to win this time. martyns not sure if he wants to (he does). they mostly talk about the stars though, and their favourite constellation. its supposed to be nice and calm, fairly reminiscent of the calm before a storm.'

i edited it a bit, but i reckon its still got the vibes down pretty good :D

oh and also, the fics im probably most proud so far are htgth, really the podcast au in general, and surface of the seas :D

i chose htgth / the podcast au quite a few reasons! theyre the first works i ever finished and published, and, excuse my ego /hj, but, im so happy with the way i got the bad boy's voices to fit really well!! i was (and still am honestly) shocked on how well i wrote them!! (also i really like htgth cause i set myself up some plot points im excited to build up on whenever i get back to writing it akhkfasjhf)

and surface of the seas, partly bc im just really proud of myself for writing that much ksfksajdfh. i think i mostly like it cause the little narrative comparisons and bits of lore just scattered around it :D also when i was almost finished, tying up the loose ends n stuff, it was at around 3-4k and the word count just kept going up its funny now but it was quite daunting when it was happening askfjhahfs.

oh and also maybe ive lost a piece of me, almost purely because of the puns :D

[clownnstuff]

1. Many things. writing something with some sort of romance. I normally dont write romance, my go to is horror and silly stuff. Ive also tried writing visuals, meaningful diolouge, and foreshadowing. Little things tht just makes my story enjoyable to both read and write

2. One that ive actually posted, but i have a few other ones i might post next year

3. I like to write suspence and not that much diolouge. I used to write heavy diolouge (as most starters do) by ive practiced to get better. Taht's another thing, i like to take breaks from my big projects to practice with smaller ones.

4. A lot of artists and authors on tumblr. I never would've started writing without them.

5. Fnaf (specifically the dca)

6. Me and the dca 💕💕💕💕 /hj

7. Dca (my gfs fr 🫀🫀)

8. This was my first time ever writing a fic, so yeah.

9. Liminal. Im really proud of how its doing and what will soon come.

10. Liminal

12. Its hard to beat writers block sometimes. But im working on finishing it.

16. Almost anything by Will Wood. He's my go to artist. If not then ill make a playlist based off my fic (songs vary)

18. Liminal. I want to change the name, but i know it's a little late. However, its not popular so i dont think a change would be that harmful. I want to give it a meaningful name, but i also really like liminal. So, ya know.

19/20. I have written quite a few circle stories where the start of the book is the same as the ending but they have 2 different tones or meanings. Its so satisfying to me.

24. When i first started liminal it was more of a freeform story. I would build off whatever i had written. But by chapter 3 or 4 i took a secon and actually came up with a story line and future events that'll build the story more.

25. I would write out my chapter on pen and paper while at school and then i'd go home and type everything out onto the computer.

28. I make shorter stories just for myself or a friend group. Or read

29. Probably a lot of people. Idk if i should tag or not so ill just name them. Naffeclipse, Bamsara, strawbubbysugar, and pillowspace.

30. Finish liminal and post some fics ive started and am really excited for.

(Also on christmas i will post a ton of chapters of liminal tomorow for christmas)

ALT

fic writer asks

What’s something new that you tried in a fic this year? How did it turn out and would you do it again?

How many fics did you work on this year? (They don’t have to be finished or published!)

What’s something you learned about yourself as a writer?

What piece of media inspired you the most?

What fandom(s) did you write for this year?

What ship(s) captured your heart?

What character(s) captured your heart?

Did you write for a new fandom or ship this year?

What fic meant the most to you to write?

What fic made you feel the happiest to work on?

What fic was the most satisfying to finish writing?

What fic was the most difficult to write? Did you finish it?

What fic was the easiest to write?

What were your shortest and longest fics this year?

Rec a fic you wrote or posted in 2023

What were you go-to writing songs?

What were your go-to writing snacks?

What was the hardest fic to title?

Share your favorite opening line

Share your favorite ending line

Share your favorite piece of dialogue

Share an excerpt from your favorite scene

Share the final version of a sentence or paragraph you struggled with. What about it was challenging? Are you happy with how it turned out?

What’s something that surprised you while you were working on a fic? Did it change the story?

What did you use to write? (e.g. writing programs, paper & pen, etc.)

If you had to choose one, what was THE most satisfying writing moment of your year?

Did you do anything special to celebrate finishing a fic?

How did you recharge between fics?

If this were an awards show, who would you thank?

What’s something that you want to write in 2024?

[pepprs]

HI so… per my last post today i did nothing but play video game ♥️. i havent done a wobbledogs post in a couple weeks in bc i got an ear infection and then my wifi adapter broke lol but here are some dogs i have loved recently... (im leaving a lot out bc.. there have been SO many since my last post. but these are like my favorite favorites over the last couple weeks)

this is vasthy! idk why i love them so much i just think she looks rly cool. a lot of the dogs she’s related to look kinda similar but.. idk she specifically just rly grew on me :D

this is PIGLET and they are just a happy little guy!! i wasnt expecting to love him so much but their pinkiness just makes me so happy and i love his little eye shape (it’s charlotte’s! in fact i may be wrong but he might be descended from her now that i think abt it? which would be funny bc of charlottes web lol charlotte and then a pig….) and also he was always just super friendly w the other dogs lol. i just loved having him around. an all around good guy

this is BEAK!!! i dont have many good pictures of her and u cant really tell from this one but she is my first dog who got honest to goodness horns out of nowhere…. and she has a UNICORN HORN at that! ive tried to keep horns on her offspring but i havent been successful yet and its rly frustrating lol but i will work on it

this is beanie! i think she’s piglet’s descendant somehow.. just an all around cool pup who loved holding dirt in her mouth <3

this is dumbo (named for those GIGANTIC wings) and he is the wobbledog equivalent of the get stickbugged meme lol. he had a difficult life bc as he got older he had trouble walking around bc his body got so long and his wings were so huge and his legs couldnt support him. so he would just do a lot of flips to move around and get stressed out all the time and i caught him in some funny poses (like the one pictured) but.. overall he did not have a good time. but i like him a lot and i wish i had done more to make sure he wasn’t in distress all the time

this is FLOCKA my absolute beloved!!!! (i FULLY meant to name him floppa after the meme bc of his coloring like the big cat… but i got it mixed up w flocka and by the time i realized my error "flocka” had already grown on me 💀💀💀) he only had 1 leg and he had a rude personality so instead of getting stressed he would get really angry.. and he absolutely STOLE my heart bc i started watching him rly closely and learning what would stress him out and removing the stressors before he could react to them badly! i was rly excited and proud of kinda coming up w a language to interact w each other... like he couldnt grab food a lot of the time so i would move it to this specific spot against his forehead that he would always get it from and things like that. idk i just love when dogs have like a unique personality or way of doing things that stands out and then i feel like i bond w them lol (throwback to charlotte 🥴) but thats flocka!

and THISSSSS is wammawink (solid green body, lighter red face... yes named after the centaurworld character 🥴) and her daughter wiggly (yellow hearts on green body, darker red / pink face)!!!!! wiggly is my first ever worm dog and bc of her i have completed every single achievement in the game except for one wing angel and i am SAURRR excited. wammawink only has two front legs (i kinda cheated by finding a dog code on the discord that i figured would give me a good chance of having offspring with 2 front legs 😭 but i nabbed her as soonas i saw her) and i had a TON of dogs w only two back legs to try to pair her with... it was actually soppy from one of my earlier posts who was the other parent to wiggly so that was rly cool since i loved them so much! i also am very amused / pleased that wiggly looks SO much like bambi.. like the same coloring and everything except bambi’s face is brown, same face shape and eye shape and pattern, etc.... so true of her <3

AND FINALLY!!!! LAST BUT NOT LEAST!!!!! IS MY BABY BOY CUB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am OBSESSED with his nose and as soon as i saw it i knew i couldnt let him go. look at his little paws i am SICK!!!!!! look at his EARS! HIS EYES! HIS SNOUT!!! WAUGHGHGHGGHH!!!! BABY BOY BABY!!!!!!! the pictures dont convey it (also all of these are from before he was an adult bc i was so focused on getting a worm dog when he grew up lol.. as an adult his ears and nose turned into a light purple and im still not used to it) but cub is absolutely fucking LARGE. he is maybe my biggest dog ive ever had. he was already a pretty big puppy and he maybe tripled in size as he grew up to the point where he can’t really sit inside the den now without having to bend his head. also this was more exaggerated when he was a puppy / juvenile but when he flies his wings kinda.. jerk him backwards and all over the place and splay out his hind legs? and i am SO obsessed w it its the cutest thing ever in the whole world. i love himmmmm 💓💗💝❣️💖💞💗💓💞💝💖❣️💓💓💞💗💖💝❣️💓 (also he literally picked up the fucking VACUUM and was flying with it in the first pic. icon behavior)

[sukirichi]

— LOVE LETTER FROM ANON ; 💌

this is from an ask i received. i copy pasted and replied here as a text post since i can’t put “read more” on anon asks and it’s quite long hehehe. to the anon who sent me this, i give you loads of my love, thank you so much for everything !!

[ the ask ]

hi lovely,

i just read earned it and i have a couple things i’d like to say to you if you don’t mind. before i start, i completely understand if you don’t want to share this ask or even read at all which is fair. but if you do decide to read it, i know that one person such as me cannot change the decisions a writer had made such as discontinuing a series but i hope that this allows you some sense of peace or happiness towards your creation and end of earned it. i’m actually writing this is my notes before i send it to you so that’s how you know i truly mean it. buckle up baby!

i’d like to start with this; i just read and finished all the remaining chapters of earned it. i don’t know how to say this without sounding arrogant or cocky which truly isn’t my intention here, i promise so i’ll just say it as is. i swear to ever loving god, i’ve scoured the entirety of tumblr, ao3, fanfiction.net, wattpad, everything and anything, and it still isn’t very often that i find works like these, far and few between dare i say. ive looked through almost everything i could get my hands on to read in the jjk fandom and dear god, do you manage to keep on surprising me. i’ve read majority if not all your works along with following you on ao3 and tumblr, and i must say. i truly am so fucking impressed. completely and absolutely fucking floored if you will. the amount of plot twists and pure emotion you managed to put into this is only something i can dream of ever creating.

i cannot lie, it truly my hearts to think that people gave you so much shit over this to which ended in you deciding to discontinue along with your lack of interest which at least, is understandable unlike the hate. i literally cannot comprehend how people would be unhappy with the outcome so far after reading it since it was beyond fucking magnificent in my eyes. it kept me on my toes the entire time whilst never managing to bore me once and as someone with adhd, thats fucking hard to do, i’ll admit it. props to you. and as much as i want to grovel and beg for crumbs, something, anything to know about how it ends, i know that that will most likely accomplish nothing to both you and i so decided to just say this.

thank you for writing this. thank you for not only writing it but dealing with the experience of unwanted and negative criticism to the point you had to stop and discontinue it whilst also being generous and amazing enough to keep it up so other people could still read it. i really hope your proud of earned it and how it turned out so far, because if i were you, i’d be so bloody fucking proud i wouldn’t know what to do with myself.

my friends often tell me i overstep my boundaries and i really hope i aren’t doing that with this but i just really, truly, wanted to express my genuine appreciation and thanks towards your writing and towards you as a writer that puts out content, not to mention for free!!!!, for people like me. i also don’t want to seem as if i’m glorifying earned above all your other works, because that’s not what i mean. your writing is just… just fucking chefs kiss. sorry, my brains starting to run out of words at this point but oh my god. thank you for letting me experience the experience of earned it even though there was no proper end. i’d rather have that than nothing at all. and maybe i misread this entire thing, maybe you are goddamn proud of your work, which you fuckinf should be considering the pure quality it is. once again, chefs kiss!!

i just… i don’t know what to say anymore. your writing, quite literally, has made me completely fucking breathless in a good way of course. anyways, i hope this wasn’t too much of a ramble and at least managed to make you smile or something. have a lovely day sweetheart!!!! <333 :*)

OMG ANON PLS FORGIVE ME IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME DAYS TO RESPOND TO, I DIDN’T WANT TO GIVE YOU A HALF ASSED RESPONSE SO I WAITED TO GET MY MENTAL ENERGY BACK TO A HUNDRED PERCENT SO I CAN SEND BACK MORE LOVE TO YOU WHOLEHEARTEDLY !! FIRST OF ALL UHM… 

you really made me speechless with this one, you have no idea. I’ve lost count of the times I’ve reread this and teared up a little bit because you know… I’m so shocked like I really have no idea what I did to receive such a sweet message because I’m just writing silly fanfics when I’m feeling it yknow? Or at least that’s what it seems like because it turns out I have a huge impact on others and I’m able to make people happy like I’ll never EVER get used to that feeling and I mean that in a good way !! Like I’m in a constant state of disbelief that people are this affected by my content and I’m just… 

I’m so thankful truly PLEASE can I give you a hug I’m so happy sobs sobs sobs

also baby, thank you sm for this again AAAAHH. I’m not sure if you really mean ‘Earned It’ the mafia! gojo series or ‘Reckless’ the CEO gojo series though ?? Both are discontinued but Earned It was discontinued bcos my dumbass killed Naoya there and he was my favorite so I lost the motivation and it was all my fault SOBBSSS. as for Reckless though, yeah I’d say it was mostly the hate I got for it that demotivated me into continuing it :// but if this ask is meant for Earned It, then yes thank you so much for the kind words as well, though I didn’t really receive hate for it so no worries !!

and aaah anon im…I’m at a loss for words lmao but the part where you said where you would be proud if you wrote it, that’s really…LIKE IDK it just hit me bcos oftentimes I look at something I poured my heart into, but then I’d have days where I’d be like YIKES that wasn’t a good one. its so easy to forget the effort we put into something when we’re affected by external factors. and yeah even though I really don’t want to continue either series anymore, thank you for leaving me the important note of being proud of myself <33 

although the series (earned it) wasn’t really something I’d properly executed and planned for, I do remember being passionate over it and feeling truly excited to update. even if it didn’t end out the way I wanted it to, it’s still something I poured my heart on and that’s magnificent on its own, so I’ll be prouder of myself from now on <33

no worries bb you are not overstepping any boundaries at all !! believe me when I say this ask truly do means a lot to me – more than you’ll ever know. messages like these are what keeps me going, as feedback is important to writers, but most of all it’s the genuine support and sincerity that gets to me. 

I’m truly humbled and grateful right now. thank you for this again and again and again.

THIS MADE ME MORE THAN SMILE !! there’s a lot of things I’m struggling with even if I don’t publicly express it, but messages like these will always have a special place in my heart. I’m sincerely grateful for everything, and I’ll continue writing here and sharing my works!! It’s supportive people like you that make these moments worthwhile. I’ll never forget this message anon AAAAH I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THANK YOU THANK YOU YOU HAVE AN EVEN BETTER DAY OR NIGHT, you have me weak in the knees for this

OKAY BRB SOBBING IN HAPPINESS

[gamegrumpiess]

Don't Forget About Me PART ONE?

Its been a fucken minute. I've been working a lot really. Trying to get my place together since I moved and what not. I have free time again! So here you go. Also! If you want me to continue this, let me know!

Dan x Reader

Warnings? Might be a bit sad, but nothing worth crying over.

You can request some shit!

(y/m/n) - your mom's name

(y/l/n) - your last name

(h/t)- home town

~~~~~~~

~1992~

Young Danny's POV

"Dan! Dinners ready!" My mom yells from downstairs. "I'll be right there!" I pause my game and make my way down. It's been freezing in my room lately, New Jersey winter really taking a toll on our house. The heater isn't installed yet, though I wish it was. I only have so many blankets.

"Dana, Leigh, there's new neighbors across the street. They've been here for about a week, I met the woman and her fiance last night, but her kids weren't home. I think it'd be a good idea to welcome them all. After dinner we'll all go down together. Is that a good idea?" My mom and dad have always been really nice like that. I feel wave of anxiety rush over me, it's not that I don't want to meet them, I just feel weird going to their house just to introduce ourselves. Dana nods her head and goes back to eating her soup, so content with her life. I'm not looking forward to this...

After we all finish eating, my mother tells us to get ready and look decent for the neighbors. What would 'decent' be? A regular shirt with jeans? I'll be in my jacket so I guess it really doesn't matter. After I get myself together, I walk downstairs to see Mom and Dad waiting for me and Dana. "Alright, let's go guys!" Dana comes out of her room dressed and ready as well. "I'm ready!" She yells with her childish voice. At least she's excited, because I'm not.

*ding ding dong ding*

A woman opens the door with a smile. "Oh, hello Debbie! What brings you here?" My mom smiles back at the woman, "I thought we could all come welcome you to the neighborhood!" The woman looks shocked a bit before she opens the door wide and invited us all in. "So this is my husband, call him Avi, my daughter Dana, and my son Leigh. He likes to be called Daniel, though." The woman smiles and shakes my dad's hand and mine. Dana has gotten a little bit shy, so the woman kneels down to her height. "Hi Dana, I'm (y/m/n). I work with kids your age all the time! You know, we have a pet turtle, his name is Cheesy. Would you like to meet him?" Dana's eyes light up at what (y/m/n) said. She nods her head frantically as the woman points to a glass talk with rocks and a little bit of water. "He's right there. Go ahead and talk to him!" As Dana runs to look at, what I assume is Cheesy, the woman turns back to us. "My fiance is at work right now. But my daughter and son are here. Y/N!" (Y/m/n) yells upstairs. "I'm coming!!" A little voice yells back. A girl came downstairs into view. She looks my age, but I haven't seen her at school, is she new? "This is my daughter, y/n. My younger son, Jacob is taking a nap in his room. Shes been working on her room all day." My mom smiles at y/n, "hey y/n! How old are you? Do you go to school here yet?" Y/n looks down, clearly a little shy. "I'm 12 years old... I don't go to school yet here, I'm new, I kind of don't want to." She states truthfully. She's only a year younger than me, but she seems very mature for a 12 year old. Then again, I'm kind of mature for a 13 year old.

As time goes on, y/n and her mom start breaking out of their she'll a little bit. Ms (y/l/n) says they just moved here from (h/t), she left her husband a while back and met a man who lived here. So I guess the man who lives here now isn't y/n's and Jacob's actual dad. Something about that is really sad to me, I have both of my parents. I can't really imagine what it's like to only have one in your life. "Is y/n going to go to the same school as Leigh?" I knew that question would come up. And turns out, yes she will. I'm not really complaining. At least she'll have one person she knows. I'm not entirely popular at all, but at least she won't be alone. Y/n looks at me and smiles. She really does have a sweet smile.

~later that night~

"Debbie, she's out there again! Poor kid, I hope she's okay." My dad calls out to my mom. "She's out there almost every night. Do you think she's okay?" I get curious and look at the time. 10:18 pm. Who would be out this late? Sure, it's a Saturday, but it's so cold outside this time. It's probably going to snow soon. I walk out to my mom and dad to see what's going on. "Who's outside?" Mom points out the window and I look out to see a figure sitting in the empty driveway across the street. "Almost every night, y/n just sits on the cold driveway. Her mom works graveyard shifts a lot. I wouldn't doubt it if she's home alone, poor thing." My mom puts her hand over her heart and looks down, her motherly instincts kicking in. "Leigh, could you please go out there and see if she's okay? She's always out there for hours at a time." I comply to what my mom says, mostly because I don't want to disappoint her by saying no. Also, I'm a little curious as well as to why she's out in the cold so late.

Y/n POV

Space is so cool. I've loved the stars and planets since I was a baby. On the nights when my mom is working, Jacob stays with my stepdad at his place. He's only 5, I get it. At this point I'm used to being alone. It's not a bad thing. I like it. When I was younger my dad would always leave me by myself so he could work. I was old enough to take care of myself though, little 7 year old me. I would do this back then as well. Sit outside and look at the sky. Even on days when the sky would be covered by clouds, I'd still stare In wonder above.

I hear a door close across the street and a skinny boy huddled up in jackets walk out of it. I hope he's not coming here, I'm not good with boys one on one. They make me feel awkward. Plus, he's a good looking boy. That makes it way worse. "Y/n, right?" He's standing right above me. I smile slightly, "Yeah, that's right. Aren't you cold?" He's very skinny, probably doesn't have body heat of his own like me. Im on the thicker side of the wall when it comes to looks. I'll probably always will be, but that okay. "Yes I'm freezing. But I saw you out here and I thought I should ask if you're okay."

I look up at him, "I'm okay. I just like looking at the stars. I'd rather be out here looking at the sky than in a quiet house." I tell him truthfully. "Are you home alone?" I nod and smile. "Yea, my mom works at the children's hospital and my little brother is with my stepdad at his house. I dont go because my stepsisters don't really like me. Which is fine, I don't really like them either." He sits down by me, criss crossed and hands in his pockets. "Are you okay on your own, though? My mom is worried too." His mom? Why would she be worried about me? I guess I am out here a lot. "Tell your mom im fine, and thank you for worrying. I appreciate that." He looks back to his house and then to me again. "Do you want me to sit here with you for a bit?" I smile again, "Sure. Just don't get frostbite in my driveway." He laughs and I join in as well.

~1997~

Y/n POV

I've known Dan for almost 6 years now. Since that night he'd be sitting on my driveway with me any chance we could. He's grown up a lot, but so have I. I'm proud of him, really. He just graduated high school, the only thing is, he's leaving for college. I still have 12th grade left. It sucks, my best friend is leaving. In the 6 years I've known him, I've grown to have a massive crush on him. He's gotten a lot taller, his hair has grown more, he's just this tall silly nerd. I'm not one for cliche cheesiness... But I really do love him. The times hes had girlfriends, it's been pretty painful. There's been more than a few nights when I'm on the driveway alone, or I'd have to eat lunch with Joe and Dylan alone because he'd be out with his girlfriend at that time. I'd be in pain, but I would never let it get to me. If he's had other girlfriends, it's clear he doesn't like me like that. And that's fine, I'm okay with just being his friend. As long as he's in my life at all I'm okay.

But he's leaving.

Dan's POV

My last night here in New Jersey is tonight. The flight for Boston leaves tomorrow morning, early as hell too. I'd have to go to bed soon if I really want to catch it. My room looks so empty... All my memories of growing up are in this exact house. I went to go see Ms (y/l/n) earlier today and say goodbye before she went to work, even said bye to Jacob. Y/n wasn't there, (y/m/n) said she was at band practice. I told her not to worry, I'll probably see y/n tonight since I usually sit with her in her driveway at night. Luckily, it's not cold anymore. Summer weather keeping me cool enough to not wear shorts, though. I walk out and see y/n sitting where she usually sits. Except now with a cat in he shirt to keep the cat warm in the cool weather. She looks up at me and waves, and I can't help but smile a little and wave back before starting to walk over.

If I had a choice, I'd take her with me. She's my best friend, I don't want to leave her alone. Joe and Dylan are leaving as well, she'll be alone at school and she'd have no one to sit with at night in her driveway. 6 years spent with her, and I wouldn't want to change it for the world. She's a really good friend.

"Hey.." she says, careful not to wake the cat in her lap. "Hey, I'm leaving tomorrow morning.. I wanted to come say bye to the cat." I say jokingly. She rolls her eyes and nudges my leg as I sit beside her. "Shut up, Dan. I can't believe it, you're going to college." I can't help but agree. I shake out my hair a little bit. "Yup. I really want to be a musician, but my dad said hed pay for my college if I go into advertising. I really don't want to, but I cant pay for myself on my own." She pets the cat again and shrugs. "Soon enough, you will be a musician. You'll have thousands of fans, be on stage rocking out like you've always wanted. You'll have people recognize you in the street wanting a picture and an autograph. You'll be so successful, as long as you put your passion in it." I can't help but smile at her. That is my dream, always has been. "It's gonna be weird without you guys. Senior year... I have one more year before I leave too," she looks at the sky again. "It's kinda scary. I won't be a kid anymore. Growing up in general is scary." I grab her shoulder and look in her eyes. "Hey don't talk like that. You're gonna be a great voice actress like you've always wanted to be. You might even become a singer too. You have to put passion in it too. You'll be in all your favorite anime shows, and video games. You can do it too. Don't forget that." She looks down and nods. "I will. Hey promise me something though." I look at her and encourage her to go on. "Don't forget about me. I know you're gonna grow up and find all the success in the world, just don't forget about this time in your life. Our friendship, who you are. Don't forget, please." I give her a sad smile and lean in to hug her. "I could never forget about you. You're one of my best friends. Don't worry. I'll keep in touch as much as possible, I promise." She smiles and hugs back. I start to walk back to the house when I hear her call my name again, "Dan!......." I turn back to her and she looks down before looking back up to me. "Be safe out there." She stares at me and I nod. "You too, y/n.."

To be continued?~

[tasyoungreckless]

may these memories break our fall. – Nashville secret sessions story

“Is that Kara?” she asked loudly over the music as she grabbed my hands and twirled me around. I was stumbling on the pillows below my feet but grasped her hands so tight. All I could do was aggressively nod and hope she couldn’t see the tears forming in my eyes in the dark, candle-lit room.

I have read dozens, if not hundreds of Taylor meet and greet stories. I have cried out of love for her and happiness for my friends and sadness that it wasn’t me. I have felt so close to meeting her and insanely disappointed when it didn’t happen. But the feeling I had on October 25? The feeling like my dreams were coming true but that I was also maybe going to pass out? That feeling was worth it. It was worth everything to me. So, here’s my story. It’s been a long time in the making. (I’m leaving out the stuff from before because it was just getting so long, but I got my message on tumblr from TN on Saturday and my call on Sunday. i bought flights Monday and my mom insisted on flying from DC and meeting me there to make sure it was all legit, even though she couldn’t come with).

OKAY SO once we got to the secret spot, I saw people I recognized and made lots of friends waiting (hi everyone!!!) We got checked in, did security all that jazz. We finally got to her house and mingled outside and ate. There were chick-fil-a nuggets (which is so funny because a few months ago I messaged Taylor to come to my Fourth of July party and all I said was “Come to my party. We will have chick fil a nuggets” LOL. on brand) and sushi and the REP cookies and M&Ms. Not a lot of people were eating much but you BET YOUR ASS i was chowing down. 

They let us into the room where we would listen to the album and I got a spot slightly to the left of where Taylor would be sitting. The floor was just covered in blankets and pillows and it looked like a huge slumber party was about to go down. 

Before we knew it, Taylor walked in with Abigail and of course we all lost it. I think you have all seen what they were wearing by now, but god they looked like angels. Taylor looked exactly like I imagined and yet so different too. It is such a strange feeling seeing someone you have always seen in pictures in real life. Someone you see virtually every single day. I teared up because I just was so so excited and felt like it wasn’t real life. 

So obviously y’all know what is next and that is she played us all of reputation. The album blew me away. It’s not like I was surprised, because I knew it would be good, but like it was just SO good?! And so cool to watch Taylor and Abi, Tree, Andrea and Scott singing along and doing these little dances. All of us were just JAMMING on the floor listening along.

I thought it was really incredible how Taylor made eye contact with every single person in that room. Every single one. Multiple times. It didn’t matter where you were sitting. She looked at you and sang to you and smiled so big. I love her. 

It was when we got to Look What You Made Me Do that she decided we could have a little dance party to shake out our legs and take a break. Someone dimmed the lights and since we all knew this song, we were able to just sing (scream?) the lyrics together with our idol dancing along our side, which was a dream. She was towards the middle of the room, so I made my way over there to dance near her. 

Before I knew it, she reached out to grab my hands and looked me dead in the eye. “Is that Kara?” she asked me, trying to get closer to see my face. It was like a million butterflies were released in my stomach at once. I was in shock. I was so happy. But I was speechless. I nodded and we danced to the bridge. It was literally at the “I’ll be the actress starring in your bad dreams” part, which was my tumblr bio. SO ON BRAND. SO PERFECT.

So we heard the rest of the songs and they continued to blow us away. Before long, we had finished the album. She was so honest with us about each song and I absolutely love her for that. She trusts us so much it is unreal. And y’all are not prepared for how good this album is. i CANNOT WAIT

OKAY OKAY NOW THE FUN MEETING HER PART

At first they called a few people by name to go first, but then they let everyone else just go whenever they wanted. A bunch of people seemed to want to wait until the end, but I knew my nerves would only get worse. I watched her meet some people from the corner, which was so incredible. It is honestly almost as exciting as meeting her yourself. You get to watch how she interacts with each person and takes her time. She also looks them dead in the eye and listens so intently. She never rushed anyone. It was beautiful.

OKAY SO FAST FOWARD TO MY TURN HERE WE GO

“Kara!!! Oh my god I’m so happy you’re here!” she said as she quickly walked toward me with her arms outstretched. I hugged her so tight trying to keep the tears back.

“Thank you SO much for coming!”

“Are you kidding, thank you so much for having me!”

We pulled away from the hug and I was looking right in her eyes, slightly looking up because she’s so tall. She said something along the lines of “I’m so glad we are finally meeting. You’re so lovely!” and I just sort of laughed and said “Oh my god Taylor, my mom isn’t going to believe you said that” (referring to her knowing my name and such).

“But you are Kara! You’re so lovely and sweet. Like you’re amazing, tell her I said that!”

oKAY SO YOU KNOW IM DYING ON THE INSIDE BUT TRYING TO STAY COMPOSED. MY LEGS WERE SORTA SHAKING BUT I WAS DOING BETTER THAN EXPECTED. 

I tried to keep myself together and tell her how much I loved reputation and just said “Taylor, the album is amazing” and she smiled, but she looked a bit distracted as she was looking at me and sort of interrupted and just said “Kara you’re even more beautiful in person. Like you are so naturally beautiful! Like you aren’t even wearing makeup and you’re so pretty?!”

excuse me WHAT. In my head I’m laughing as I know I’m definitely wearing makeup but that a lot of it came off when I cried earlier and that I don’t wear all that much in general but like WHAT I WAS SO SHOOK LIKE SHE CALLED ME BEAUTIFUL ??? THE FUCK 

All that I could muster up was a “Oh my God” and “thank you so much” as I wrapped my arms around her neck again and she pulled me in for a hug (and yes she smells so good like a vanilla goddess).

So after she SHOWERED me with compliments that my poor heart couldn’t handle, I knew I had a few things I could talk about with her. I told her about studying abroad in London last semester and she asked what school. I explained my program through my home university and told her about how I interned in SoHo. I joked because I told her I knew she was there at the same time, supposedly undercover, and said that we probably ran into each other on Oxford Street. She said how amazing it was that I had that opportunity. We talked about other places I traveled and I mentioned going to the Canary Islands for spring break and said “how casual” and she laughed and nodded. I just said how much I loved London and that city life. She said something along the lines of “That is soooo amazing. You’re getting to see the world and have these opportunities! I’m so excited to see all you do, Kara. I’m so proud of you!” she said, giggling.

....this woman....is proud of ME....im proud of YOU you queen WHAT 

I think I said “thank you so much for saying that” and hugged her again. I needed a second to think of the next thing to talk about so I asked her if we could take our picture. She said of course and pointed to the mantle behind us that had Grammys and Moonmen and a bunch of her awards on it. “Do we want to hold a Grammy or something?”, but I hesitated and said “well..” and she asked “or did you have a pose in mind?” and I just said “Can we just act we’re best friends having the night of our lives because that’s basically how I feel right now” and she smiled and said “of course!”

So we turned towards the camera, which was probably the only time I looked away from her during our entire time together, and we hugged super tight and I smiled bigger than I probably ever have before. I CANNOT WAIT TO SEE IT BUT IM NERVOUS 

She turned back to me and I still had a few more things to say and ask. Something I thought about during the session was just a silly question for her. “So I’m in college and like I just need to know what’s your favorite drinking game?” and she laughs and says “Oh God, my favorite drinking game?!” as she turned away to think about it. “Well I will play any of them and I love playing them…and I sorta think that’s the problem…” and she smirked at me. I NEED TO GET DRUNK WITH TAYLOR SWIFT ONE DAY OKAY LIKE WHAT 

I was feeling like my time was running out so I hugged her again and she said “It’s so cool meeting you. Like I sort of feel like I’m just your older sister…just like stalking you on the internet” and my jaw kind of dropped. “I love seeing your life online and I’m sure we will talk there!” and I just said “That means so much to me. Thank you so so much” and we hugged again.

“I’ll see you on tour and of course online,” I said. She smiled and said goodbye and that it was nice to meet me. I turned to leave and looked behind my shoulder and just said, “love you!”

It was the most surreal experience ever. I think i blacked out like i can barely remember it anymore, but wow it was so amazing and the fact that she KNEW ME AND RECOGNIZED ME made it even more incredible ? i never expected that in a hundred million years. 

AND TO TOP IT ALL OFF SHE STALKED ME AFTER AND LIKED SIX OF MY POSTS ABOUT THAT NIGHT INCLUDING DANCING WITH ME AND RECOGNIZING ME. LIEK WHAT THE FUCK SHES SO INCREDIBLE AND I FEEL SO SO LUCKY. PLEASE DONT GIVE UP YALL I NEVER EVER SAW THIS COMING

From the bottom of my heart, thank you Taylor and thank you Taylor Nation. I didn’t think things like this could just happen to people like me ? I’ve never felt that special or deserving of things like this, but you’ve proved that we all deserve this opportunity. I love you so so SO much. I’m still not sure how it happened, but oh my god am I glad it did. I will never forget this as long as I live. 

See you on tour and online, big sister. 

[auroraphilealis]

Heaven Scent Chapter Eight

Heaven Scent | Dan Howell rarely leaves the house unless he has too, too socially awkward to function normally around other people, and generally making his only friends through Louise, a sweet beta who took him under her wing a few years back when they were both still in college. It’s no surprise, then, that the omega has yet to find a mate, despite craving one rather a lot. It’s not until he attends Louise’s birthday party and gets accidentally-on-purpose set up with an attractive alpha named Phil Lester who smells absolutely heavenly that Dan starts to fall into a proper romance, complete with courting and scenting and the like. | Phan | Mature | A/B/O dynamics (Omegaverse fic), Fluff, Getting Together, Eventual Smut, Courting | 7,465 Words this chapter

Disclaimer: In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil.

Hello my friends! Ahhh, this is the final chapter of Heaven Scent, and I can’t believe it’s ended up quite as long as it appears to have :O In three weeks, I’ve managed to write 57K words, and to top it all off, this is the first chaptered fic I’ve completed on my own in at least 4 years, if not more, so… to say I’m proud of myself would be a complete and utter understatement.

Thank you to everyone whose supported this story since day one, when I first started writing it, and when I first started posting. It’s meant the world to me to have people so excited to see a story that defies the norm of what this trope usually is. Thank you as well to every person who has left a comment, or messaged me to show me their support and to tell me that this is the first time they’ve enjoyed this trope, as that is all I’ve ever wanted to do with this fic.

I’m so sad to see this ending, but all great things must come to an end, I’m afraid. I hope to eventually do a semi-sequel including some mpreg, for those who are interested, but I do start school again in 3 days, so I can’t promise when or if that sequel will appear <33 Still, maybe look out for it <33

This chapter does contain smut and sexual situations, so please read the second half in particular with caution. I promise you’ll know when it’s coming.

(Ao3) (Previous)

Chapter Eight

As promised, Phil texted Dan the entire time he was having his heat.

At first, it was silly things like “i forgot to find the rest of my underwear, im gonna have to do laundry every day now”, and “i know you told me not to forget anything but all my most important things are all in your flat :’(,” both of which made Dan laugh and his heart clench up in happiness to know that Phil’s entire life had pretty much already migrated into Dan’s flat.

After the first few hours, though, while Dan was in-between flare up’s and munching on power bars, they become more sentimental and funny, more similar to what Phil used to text Dan back at the very beginning of their relationship mixed with corny love struck texts that reflected their emotions from tonight. They were everything Dan could have ever asked for and more, and they truly made this heat the best that Dan had ever experienced.

From: Phil Lester <3

i miss you already :’( do you miss me?

From: Phil Lester <3

part of me wishes id stayed, but im glad were waiting

From: Phil Lester <3

look at this dog i saw on my facebook feed. when are we gonna adopt? :’D

From: Phil Lester <3

i found this jacket you might like and i might have already bought it, oops

From: Phil Lester <3

the new youtube red short film im editing -- we have to watch it together when its out, okay??? i think youll love it!!

From: Phil Lester <3

thinking of you :’(

The last one came with an attached photo of Phil’s face, smiling delicately at Dan like he was unsure if he should be sending it all, and yet it made Dan feel warm to the core on the second afternoon of his heat. He hadn’t realized just how badly he’d needed the picture until he was staring at it, fingers fisted around his cock while his core fluttered around nothing and slick dripped from between his legs.

Dan could feel his insides aching as he sunk his fingers back into himself and dropped the phone, flinging his head backwards on a ragged moan as he pressed in deep and gave himself everything he wanted. There was an abandoned vibrator at his side that he’d given up on in preference of pretending his own fingers where Phil’s, and he felt so fucking good that he came almost instantly after pressing against his g-spot, collapsing backwards into a pile of pillows that smelled like Phil.

Phil, Phil, Phil, he was all Dan could think about, and he gasped and moaned as he writhed in his nest, soaking in the fact that everything smelt like alpha. Never before had Dan felt so good, and while he was a mix of exhausted and bored when he wasn’t in the midsts of heat waves pressing into his tummy and begging Dan to get pregnant, he was also content, because for the first time in his life, Dan had a partner to think of while he went through this.

Not to mention, when he was finished, he had a standing date with Phil to finally have sex, something he couldn’t stop thinking of.

How many times now had he rutted against Phil’s cock and felt the outline of the alpha, hot and long in his jeans? How many times had he pressed in close and felt that bulge, body reacting in desperate want to have it inside already? Phil’s mouth was pure heaven on Dan’s lips, and he couldn’t even begin to imagine how it was going to feel everywhere else, but he wanted it. He wanted it more than he wanted anything in the world, and as the image of Phil biting into his scent gland, bonding him, sunk into Dan’s mind, he came with an explosive call of the alpha’s name, knuckle deep into his core once more, and hand fisted tight around his dick.

Dan didn’t know what was better, the image, or the sensation, and he gasped as he rocked into himself, desperate for Phil, soaked in sweat and slick, wishing the alpha was there to clean him up.

The memory of him would have to be enough for now. Dan just knew he couldn’t wait until he could finally have the love of his life in every way.

 On the fourth morning after Phil had left Dan’s side, Dan woke up exhausted, but okay. The heat cramps had dissipated, and the desperate arousal that had made his skin thrum for the past three days was finally gone. His cock was soft and limp against his thigh, and while his insides throbbed from being used and abused so much, the slick had pretty much stopped, and he wasn’t clenching desperately around nothing anymore.

He was, however, covered in slick, and fully aware that the entire walk-in he’d sequestered himself in smelled like nothing but heat and omega pheromones. Dan was willing to bet his entire flat was tinged with the scent as well, but while Dan knew he was going to have to get up eventually and clean the whole mess up, he was mostly just relieved.

Heat’s were amazing, don’t get Dan wrong. He actually really enjoyed them, and while spending a heat with a partner was always going to be better than spending it alone, Dan had yet to meet an omega who actually complained about their heat when they came less often than seven-ish times a year. Sure, they were long, often boring, and sometimes painful, but the chance to take time off and feel flushed with pleasure for three days wasn’t something to gawk at. Most omega’s enjoyed the time to feel extra pleasured, and when it came time to get pregnant and have babies, most seemed to feel euphoric.

Dan couldn’t wait to one day experience that, but not until he and Phil were ready.

No, Dan was relieved that his heat was over because it meant he’d finally get to have Phil back in his home, and he’d honestly desperately missed the alpha since he’d been gone.

Dan’s body was sore, he was tired of living off of protein bars and water, and he wanted Phil home, but he didn’t so much mind that he’d just spent three days essentially pleasuring himself to the mental image of Phil.

The fact that Phil was going to be the one pleasuring him the next time, though… well, that was enough to get Dan out of his nest and cleaning up.

The nest went first. With his heat over, and his hormones back to normal, Dan didn’t crave the safety of the little den any longer. He pulled it apart, sheets first, to start setting them in the wash with a special, slick dispelling soap. Then, he made two more piles by the washer and dryer; one full of the duvets he’d used up, and another full of the clothing he’d eventually need to return to Phil, as well as his own that he’d need to hang back up.

Once that was mostly taken care of, Dan took the more non-cloth like items such as his teddy bear, and his toys, into the bathroom to manually clean of his scent. The teddy bear, Dan knew, would have to air out for the most part, as he’d used it for nearly every single one of his heats in the past, but it hardly mattered. If it was left in the bathroom, it shouldn’t bother anyone too much.

His toys, on the other hand, needed to be properly washed and sanitized before Dan put them away, and his fingers were deft and quick against the malleable plastic. He’d cleaned them a thousand times in the past, and he had no desire to linger over them now when he had something much more pleasant coming for him tonight.

Just the thought made Dan grin and groan a little, low in his throat. He’d lived off the image of Phil fucking him for three days, now. The idea of it finally happening was making him wet, and he had to tighten his legs a bit to prevent the slick from getting everywhere.

On the upside, it didn’t smell quite as arousing as heat-slick did, and reassured Dan that he was most definitely finished with that part of his life for now. No, any arousal Dan felt now was purely his own, and not instinct. He couldn’t wait until Phil got home.

 By the time Dan had finished cleaning and airing out his apartment, a second load of duvets in the washer, it was nearing six o’clock. Phil didn’t tend to get off and home until closer to nine, but Dan hadn’t yet texted him it was safe to come back to Dan’s, and his heart was racing in his chest at the very idea of it all. He could feel his insides sopping with slick already, desperate for something Dan had been waiting months to have, and he scolded himself a little for getting overly excited.

What if Phil had changed his mind? What if he wanted to wait a little longer before they had sex? Dan could and would understand that, never wanting to push the alpha past his boundaries, but he needed to get his body under control before he lost his mind completely and demanded Phil come home and fuck him already.

Settling back on the couch, Dan finally relaxed and picked up his phone.

Phil had been texting him all day, the same as he had the past three - little nonsense words about what was going on, and pictures of things that had reminded Phil of Dan. There was even another selfie of Phil frowning at the camera, captioned with how he reacted to his coworkers being absolute idiots, and it made Dan laugh and sigh happily as he fingered his phone in his hands.

Phil Lester was everything that Dan had ever wanted, and he still couldn’t figure out how he’d gotten so lucky.

To: Phil Lester <3

De-heat-afied the flat. Come home? :(

From: Phil Lester <3

home? :’D

To: Phil Lester <3

well, you said it yourself. you practically live here now. so yeah… come home

From: Phil Lester <3

be there in twenty minutes

There was no mention of their plans in the quick five minute conversation. They didn’t discuss what Dan was hoping was going to happen. They didn’t talk about missing each other, or the I-love-you’s, or anything else that had happened since the last time they’d seen each other, and yet, it didn’t seem to matter to Dan.

Phil had called his flat home, had joked about it being something more to him than just Dan’s flat, and had spent a good portion of Dan’s heat complaining that all of his things were at Dan’s. Phil had promised to be home nearly three hours before he normally got off work, and that… that was everything to Dan.

Just knowing that Phil already considered Dan’s home, home too, and that he’d missed Dan enough to leave work early, that was everything to Dan, who couldn’t seem to stop it when he started to purr and fell backwards on his couch to lay against the cushions with stars in his eyes. His heart was beating frantically in his chest, aching in a way that made Dan want to burst with how much he loved Phil Lester.

Never… never in his life had he felt so treasured and so wanted. It didn’t matter, in that moment, if they had sex that night. It didn’t matter, because Dan already had everything he’d ever wanted.

 Ever the gentleman - or just a dork, Dan wasn’t sure - Phil knocked on the front door when he arrived.

Dan knew it was him because he’d be able to pick up Phil’s scent from anywhere by now, and he rolled his eyes at the sound because Phil had long since been given a key, but he didn’t complain as he stood and hurried to his front door, desperate to see his alpha again. His fingers were slippery on the doorknob, but he managed to pull it open, and was taken by surprise when the first thing he saw was another huge bouquet of wild flowers completely obscuring his view of Phil.

“I - what?” Dan stuttered, blushing a deep red at the notion of getting flowers again, like they were back in the beginning days and Phil was still trying to court him. He could feel his breathing had picked up, and he couldn’t help the smile that tugged at the corners of his lips, nor the way he seemed to melt into himself a little. It was such a silly, unnecessary gesture, and yet Dan was living for it.

“Phil,” he whispered, as he reached out to take the bouquet at the same time as Phil chuckled at him. His fingers tightened around the purple paper that was wrapped around the bouquet as he pulled it in close, for one second completely captivated by the scent and sight of the flowers. Then, he turned his gaze completely towards Phil, only to be faced with a look of complete and utter self-satisfaction painted across his features.

Dan was certain that he probably looked entirely enamoured.

“I hate you,” Dan muttered, and dropped the flowers to his side, taking two steps forward and pressing in close to nuzzle into his alpha. Phil chuckled again and wrapped his arms instantly around Dan, like he couldn’t help himself, and buried his face in Dan’s hair. “You didn’t have to,” Dan added for good measure as he inhaled deeply, taking in the scent of his alpha and wishing desperately to bury himself in him entirely.

“I did,” Phil murmured in response, his hands soothing against Dan’s back, scenting him unobtrusively. He breathed deeply against Dan’s hair, like he wanted to saturate Dan in Phil, and then pressed a kiss delicately to the top of his head. “I wanted to give you something special because - because I missed you,” he added, laughing at himself and hugging Dan a little tighter for a moment. “Can you really blame me?”

Dan chuckled as well, and shook his head, eyes a little wet as he pressed his face against Phil.

“No. I can’t. I missed you too,” he shot back, and sighed when Phil rumbled in response, the sound pleasant and warm as it soaked into Dan.

He’d missed this so much, more than he could say. He could spend hours just cuddling with Phil, wrapped up in his scent, and the long three days apart had felt like an eternity when Dan had spent the entire time imagining Phil was with him, in bed. Dan hadn’t even gotten to experience that yet, and it had been amazing. He couldn’t imagine what it would be like when…

His face grew a deeper red as his body started to react in tandem with his thoughts.

Dan shifted against Phil, trying to hide the fact that he was growing hard, only for Phil to draw him in closer and inhale deeply.

“I think we should get inside,” the alpha rumbled, his voice all deep and husky, the way it only ever seemed to get when he was taken slightly by instinct, when he was hard and wanting for Dan. The sound made Dan shudder and mewl, pressing in closer to Phil despite the fact that the alpha had suggested otherwise, and he pressed tentative, needy kisses against Phil’s chest.

“We probably should,” Dan agreed after a second, mind a little hazy.

He tried to pull back from Phil, but for a moment, the alpha wouldn’t let him go. His hands tightened around Dan, holding him closer, and then relaxed completely as Phil sighed. Not wanting to test the limits of Phil’s self control, Dan hurriedly stepped out of his arms, and turned on his heel to head straight for the kitchen, some part of his brain still very aware that he had a bouquet of flowers in his hands.

The sound of his front door shutting behind him was eerily reminiscent of the time Phil had showed up at Dan’s house that second time, and when the alpha’s footsteps carefully followed Dan into the kitchen, he felt a shiver rush up his spine.

Dan didn’t want to rush into this though, and while he was trembling with want, he turned, dropped the bouquet on his counter, and stared up at Phil with needy eyes.

“Alpha,” he managed, swallowing thickly when this made Phil’s pupils dilate. His hands were in fists at his sides, like he was trying to control himself, and it was like dynamite in Dan’s veins. He could feel himself beginning to grow wet, to throb with desire, because he hadn’t once seen Phil lose control in Dan’s presence just yet.

Dan wondered if Phil was just finally at the end of his rope, and couldn’t help throbbing in reaction to that.

Phil inhaled deeply, and shut his eyes.

“Look,” Dan insisted, “I know you said - before my heat, you said you’d only been waiting for the right time, but I don’t want to rush this. If you still aren’t… aren’t ready, that’s fine, Phil. When we said after, I didn’t mean it had to be immediately after,” he explained, trying to maintain his breathing and not make it anymore obvious just how desperate he was for the alpha. He’d been waiting so long, though, ready and willing to be taken and marked and claimed. His veins trembled with it, heart beating erratically in his chest. All Dan wanted was to know what Phil was like, what he tasted like, how he’d treat Dan…

He moaned before he could stop himself.

“Dan,” Phil gasped, sounding just as desperate and willing as Dan. “I want this. I want you. I’ve wanted you since day one, I just didn’t want to screw things up. Please… you’ve been all I’ve been able to think about since that night. I need you to tell me now if you’ve changed your mind. I want… I want to finally have this with you.”

His eyes were sad, and though his hands were still clenched into fists at his sides, like he was holding himself back from pouncing on Dan, he seemed to be trying to pull himself together, reign in his desire so that he could do what Dan wanted, what Dan needed, whatever that might be.

The sight of Phil’s self restraint… it broke Dan, and he launched himself into the alpha’s arms without a second thought.

For a second, Dan wondered if this was all because of his heat. Did he smell of pheromones? Were they screwing with Phil’s head? Had he not gotten rid of the scent quite enough, or was he still in heat? But no, as Dan inhaled deeply, mind dizzy with his want for Phil, he became very aware that there was next to no heat pheromones in his apartment, and those that were there, weren’t enough to drive either of them as crazy as they seemed to be just then.

Dan’s mouth came down on Phil’s, and he whispered out a soft, “I’m ready,” that seemed to be everything both male’s finally needed to break the long standing truce they’d held for months, now. Dan mewled, Phil growled, and suddenly, Dan was completely and utterly wrapped up in long-limbed alpha.

Phil’s mouth was warm as ever. Despite the way Dan could feel Phil rapidly losing control, he kissed just as sweet and as passionately as he ever had, licking and sucking at Dan’s mouth and nipping gently at his lips. When he pressed in deep, he did so in a way that felt all consuming and heated, and yet gentle at the same time. His hands embraced Dan’s body and pressed Dan close, but he didn’t crush them together the way Dan had known partners to do in the past. He just cradled Dan close with a pressure that made Dan feel wanted, but not suffocated, and kissed him until Dan was absolutely aching for more.

They were both making ridiculous noises. Dan couldn’t seem to stop purring on and off, little mewls and sighs escaping his throat, all while a rumble took up in Phil’s chest and echoed inside of Dan’s body. Dan’s hands buried themselves under Phil’s shirt, finally feeling safe enough to touch skin he’d ached to see for ages, all while Phil’s hands seemed to stutter up and down Dan’s back, unsure where they wanted to land.

It felt wonderful, and as Dan grinded his hips forwards, only to find Phil’s answering arousal there ready to meet him, he wanted nothing more than to take this to the bed.

So he did.

Dragging his mouth from Phil’s with a loud gasp, Dan pulled back against his touch, and felt a zing go through him at the ease with which Phil let him go. Phil’s eyes were half lidded and dark, the blue something different now, overblown with black and such a thin line it made it look even more intense. His mouth was wet from Dan’s kisses, and his hands were shaking at his sides, hips undulating slightly.

He looked absolutely wrecked, and the fact that Dan had done that to him, made him ache with need.

“Come on,” he insisted to Phil, taking his hand in his and tugging him hurriedly into the bedroom.

There were new sheets on the bed that didn’t smell like Phil anymore because Dan had washed them, but neither male seemed to care as they entered the room, eyes only for each other. Dan kept tugging at Phil’s hand, turning him until the alpha was doing what he wanted, and then pushed the male back against their bed until he was splayed out with his legs spread and hanging off the edge of the bed.

He looked so good like that, that Dan couldn’t help but to stop and stare. He’d wanted this for so long, wanted to have and see and hold Phil like this, eat him up and feel him intimately against Dan, and now that he was getting just that, Dan wasn’t sure where to start.

“Fuck,” he mumbled, “Phil. You look really hot like that,” he gasped, and found himself stepping forward instantly. Phil chuckled in response, smiling at Dan, and reached out with shaking hands to take Dan into his arms.

“Thanks,” he grumbled, voice so fucking deep and hot. “Now come here. I wasn’t quite done kissing you,” he teased.

How was Dan supposed to deny a request like that?

Without hesitating, Dan stepped forward and crawled onto the bed with Phil, pleased when the alpha scooted back so his legs no longer dangled off the side, and shifted his own legs to bracket on either side of Phil’s hips. Phil’s hands came up to press under the edge of Dan’s shirt, for the very first time touching Dan’s actual skin, and Dan purred as he leaned in close for another kiss.

Their lips pressed together just as needily as before, but it was the progression of Phil’s hands that really got Dan going. He rucked up Dan’s shirt without a care in the world, his hands so cold and yet hot against Dan’s skin, painting circles into his flesh and skating up his back to feel the outline of his shoulder blades. Phil had touched him a thousand times in the past, but never quite like this, never flesh on flesh, and when his hands skated back down to count against the bones of Dan’s spine, he shivered and moaned into Phil’s mouth so loud, Phil actually groaned in reaction.

“You sure your heat is over, Dan?” Phil wondered, disconnecting their mouths to laugh at Dan, “Cause you are… really, really reactive,” he added wonderingly, eyes sparkling and lips quirked in mischief. Dan leaned forward to kiss him hungrily again, his own hands moving to ruck up Phil’s shirt, exposing the alpha’s belly and sides, and tucking just under his armpits.

“I’m sure. I’m always loud,” he teased Phil when he pulled away from his lips, only to stare in wonder at the dark, dusky peaks of Phil’s nipples and the tangle of chest hair now exposed to him.

Phil’s chest was red, flushed with desire as he shuddered under Dan’s touch, who sat up on Phil’s hips to press his hands all over Phil’s exposed body. His bum rested just over the alpha’s straining dick, but Dan did nothing in reaction to it, merely smoothing his fingers around nipples and chest hair, plucking at plump skin, and watching the way Phil’s body reacted under his.

Phil never once took his eyes off of Dan, watching the way he touched, and licked his lips. Dan’s own gaze kept flicking up to Phil’s, until Dan couldn’t take it any longer, and he leaned down to bite a mark into Phil’s chest, just under his ribcage, sucking hungrily and claiming the alpha as his. He felt his scent shift to permeate over Phil’s skin, and groaned at the way Phil growled at him, fingers coming down to tangle in Dan’s hair. Dan merely sucked and bit harder, eyes closing in wonderment at the fact that he was finally getting to do this, and shifted to ruck his shirt up enough that he could pull it completely away when he pulled back from Phil’s rib cage.

He did, tossing his shirt over his shoulder and watching the way Phil’s eyes instantly moved to his exposed skin to trace over his chest.

“I want you, Alpha,” Dan whispered, “Want all of you. Want you to mark me all over,” he groaned, reaching down to press his hand against the bruise now forming on Phil’s stomach, and gasping at the way Phil growled and rolled his hips up into Dan’s ass in response. His cunt clenched around nothing slick beginning to dribble down until Dan could feel that he was getting soaked, and he groaned, throwing his head back in a way he hoped would be enticing.

“Take me, Alpha,” Dan said again, hoping this time, Phil would get the message.

He did.

While there were so many things Dan wanted to do with Phil, so much time he wanted to spend pinning the alpha to his bed, rutting down against him, and riding the cock Dan had been craving for so long, he wanted this even more - Phil taking control and making Dan feel like heaven had come to Earth early. The alpha flipped them, pressing Dan into the bed, and surging in to kiss Dan all over again.

His hands burned as they skated over Dan’s ribcage, playing at the waistband of his pants, and smoothing back up to tweak at Dan’s sensitive nipples. His own chest wasn’t quite as flat as Phil’s, filled with more fat to make room for breasts that would form should Dan get pregnant, and Phil seemed to love the swell of them, pressing the flesh up and into his palm as he groaned into Dan’s mouth. His hips rutted down into Dan’s, pressing their cocks against each other through their pants, and making Dan’s body shudder for more.

He could scent the smell of slick taking over the room, sweet and heady, as could Phil, as he pulled away from Dan’s lips and snuffle at his neck. His hands moved from cupping at Dan’s small breasts to instead rub between his legs, where the slick was pouring free, and rumbled against Dan’s neck.

“Shit. I forgot - how warm, and wet omega’s get,” he gasped against Dan’s neck. “You’re so beautiful Dan, and you smell amazing,” he groaned, nuzzling in close once more before his lips came down to suck around Dan’s scent glands.

Dan arched into the touch, moaning loudly, and rutted his body down against Phil’s searching hands as the alpha came so close to bonding them. He didn’t bite, however, not the way Dan had imagined he would - instead, he sucked, and licked, and kissed at the small spot until he seemed to have coated it in his scent so thoroughly he might as well have bit down, and then pulled away to hum against Dan’s mouth, nose rubbing gently along Dan’s.

Dan opened his eyes to find the alpha was staring at him with such need and love in his gaze, Dan nearly melted.

“Wanna bond with you one day. Wanna mark you for the world to see… but not today,” he explained, and kissed Dan leisurely one more time.

His hands had moved from between Dan’s legs, to his thighs, were he massaged the clothed skin through Dan’s sweat pants, and smoothed his fingers against him. It felt so good that Dan shuddered as Phil kissed him, licking into his mouth as gently as he always did, before pulling away.

“But I’m going to mark you in every other way,” Phil continued after a moment, the words gravely in his husky voice, eyes dark. They sent a thrill through Dan who threw his head back and moaned as Phil leaned in close and nipped at his collarbones, proceeding to decorate Dan’s chest in light hickeys and bruises that made Dan’s core tingle. He didn’t know what was throbbing worse - his dick, or his cunt; all he knew was that he wanted more.

Phil’s mouth came around Dan’s nipple, and it was better than he’d ever imagined. Phil suckled at the swell of Dan’s almost-breast, needy and wanton as he kissed and bit at it, tangling his tongue around as if he were searching for something more than just breast. The mental image of Phil suckling at Dan’s milk-wet breasts while he was pregant made Dan groan and spend pre-cum from his dick rutting up as Phil chuckled against him.

Then, he pulled back from Dan’s nipple to suck at the skin around it, marking Dan as his, before trailing further downward and marking Dan’s stomach as well.

As Phil moved, mouth hot and hands burning against his skin, Dan couldn’t help feeling like he was going to go crazy. Phil was better than Dan had ever imagined he could be, more slick and warm than anyone else Dan had ever had. He mouthed along Dan’s bellybutton, tongue fucking him there, and giving Dan a taste of what he could do, and then he was nibbling at Dan’s hip bones as his fingers played with the waistband of Dan’s pants.

Meanwhile, the alpha still hadn’t taken off his shirt, and Dan growled as he sat up and pushed the tease away from him.

“Strip,” he demanded, as his own hands pushed at the waistband of his pants, his boxers, slipping them free from and releasing the full scent of his slick into the air.

Dan could see how it was effecting Phil as the alpha clambered off of Dan to do as he’d been told, stripping first his work shirt, and then his belt from his jeans. For a second, Dan could imagine Phil tying him up with that, and then the moment was gone as Phil struggled with his jeans.

Dan reached down to stroke his hand over his cock as Phil undressed, eyes on nothing more than the great reveal of the alpha cock he’d been waiting for, and then it was there, far more glorious even then Dan had ever imagined it could be. It sprang free of his boxers as Phil scrambled out of them, hard and heavy as it bobbed between his legs, only a bit bigger than Dan’s omega one.

Alphas were always just a bit bigger, more than average, to accommodate for the knot that would settle at the base of their dick, but Dan was by no means small. In fact, he was proud of the fact that his own dick rested pale and thick against his tummy as Phil hungrily climbed back over him.

What he wasn’t expecting, was the way Phil instantly delved in to take Dan’s cock into his mouth, pleasuring Dan in a way he’d never quite experienced before - cool fingers pressed between the lips of his cunt, playing lightly with the flaps and the slick there as his mouth worked diligently and hotly over Dan’s cock. His tongue swirled over Dan’s tip, and his throat constricted around his dick as he took Dan as far as he could, fingers making Dan’s core ache with need where they played.

Phil was inhaling Dan’s scent deeply as Dan groaned underneath his touch, bucking almost wildly against Phil but trying his best to keep his body sated and still.

Dan was amazed he could want so much when he’d only just finished his heat, but he didn’t complain as Phil pressed a teasing fingers inside of Dan at the same time as he pulled back from Dan’s dick and grinned up at him.

“You taste better than I ever imagined,” Phil rumbled, “Better than anyone I’ve ever had. My mate,” he continued, leaning in to slurp up Dan’s cock all over again. Dan gasped, and groaned against the words, the sensations, as Phil pressed the finger in deeper, exploring and taking all that Dan had.

He felt so good, so much better than Dan himself, better than any toy, but it was his words that got Dan.

Phil pulled off his dick again with another hot pop.

“I wonder how good your slick will taste,” he said, and ducked in close to close his mouth around Dan’s cunt and suck.

It was… not something Dan had quite been ready for. He’d considered the chance that his alpha would want to put his mouth there as well as Dan’s cock, had considered that his alpha might give him everything, but Dan hadn’t truly expected so soon. The sensation of Phil’s mouth sucking at his cunt, lapping at his slick, all while his finger remained pressed inside of Dan… it was the best feeling Dan had ever experienced, and he wasn’t ashamed to admit that he came almost instantly when Phil pressed his tongue inside as well and slurped at Dan’s body, swallowing all that Dan had to give in the most obviously pleased ministration ever, rumbling in a pleased way.

Dan’s cock shook, and he came, gasping as cum dripped all over his abdomen while his cunt clenched up and scent a rush of slick down and out of him, straight into Phil’s mouth.

Dan shuddered as pleasure overtook him, crashing over his mind and making him cry out as his hips shook. Phil, meanwhile, didn’t stop pressing in deeper, sucking at all Dan had to give him, arching his finger and pressing against Dan’s walls in a way that made him feel like he was never going to stop coming.

His face screwed up, and his legs tensed as he came, Phil groaning for more and likely throbbing below Dan.

Dan wanted so much more.

By the time Dan had come down from his high, Phil was still fingering him lightly, but his mouth had moved from Dan’s cunt to his stomach where he was lapping gently at Dan’s skin, clearing him of spunk and rumbling happily. He had a pleased smile on his face, cock red and hard between his legs, but he didn’t seem to care for it at all as he moved his mouth to Dan’s dick and suckled gently at the head.

Dan let out a whimper at the sensation, and reached down to thread his fingers back through Phil’s black hair.

“Alpha,” he gasped, forcing the alpha’s gaze back onto him. “Fuck me. Now,” he demanded, watching as Phil reacted to the words in what seemed like slow motion. His expression turned from pleased, to dangerous, like he was losing his control, like he needed Dan as bad as Dan needed Phil.

It didn’t even matter that Dan had just come. He wanted Phil, and he wanted Phil now.

The alpha flat out growled at Dan’s demand, and shifted up on his knees as the finger inside of Dan started to work in earnest. Dan mewled at the way it felt, and grinned up at Phil in satisfaction, stretching his body out to show himself off completely. He arched his neck to set the alpha off more completely, and groaned when it caused Phil to press a second finger in needily.

“Fuck,” the alpha groaned. “I can’t wait to be inside of you, omega. Dan, god, you look so good,” he gasped, and leaned in close to nip at his neck.

He nuzzled it, licking over it again, as his fingers worked to spread Dan for him, even though Dan didn’t need it. He didn’t say a word, certain Phil was bigger than Dan was fully expecting, sure that Phil knew what he was doing, and waited as his body ached with pleasure, ready to come all over again.

“You’re cunt is so warm, Dan. So fucking warm. I forgot how good this could feel… I’ve wanted you so long,” Phil rumbled, mumbling the words against the shell of Dan’s ear, licking at the skin there and making Dan shudder all over again. He gasped at the words, arching his body up to Phil’s, and reached out with rough fingers to force Phil’s head close and kiss him.

“I’m ready,” he gasped after another minute, words muffled under Phil’s tongue, which was becoming far less composed as he usually was. He seemed unable to be as gentle as he wanted, and kissed and soothed at Dan’s mouth in apology. “Fuck me, now, Phil,” he continued, and laughed when a groan punched its way out of Phil’s throat in response.

The alpha didn’t hesitate. He pulled his fingers free from Dan’s body, and shifted so his cock bobbed between his legs and so close to Dan’s cunt, that his body clenched down at the thought of it. Dan was biting his bottom lip, and Phil was staring at him with eyes so bright and full of lust, it was amazing he hadn’t sunk all the way inside just yet.

Of course, that’s when Phil decided to take Dan completely by surprise when he said, “I love you, my Daniel,” before kissing him once more.

This time, his lips were not quite as heated. His touch was calmer, somehow, contrasting completely with the dark of his eyes mere seconds ago, but Dan didn’t even care. Somehow, this was better, so much fucking better, and even as Phil seemed to begin to lose himself again to the lust so obviously boiling over, he was gentle as his cock head nudged at Dan’s entrance and pressed inside.

Being fucked was… amazing. Being fucked by an alpha, was always particularly special.

Being fucked by Phil was like the beginning and end of the world.

He sunk in slow, cock pushing Dan’s body open, mouth panting against Dan’s lips. His chest was sweaty but perfect against Dan’s chest, flush to him as he worked to get his hips flush to Dan’s, groaning a little with each new inch Dan took. He didn’t rush, and he didn’t push, and he didn’t overwhelm Dan, but at the same time, he totally did.

Having sex with one’s mate was… more than Dan could have imagined.

There was just something about the intimacy, the care Phil put in his every movement, something about the fact that Phil had wanted to wait until just the right moment, that made everything about this seem almost otherworldly.

By the time Phil had settled all the way in, Dan knew he never wanted it to end.

“Phil,” he was gasping, the name chanting from his mouth over and over, and over again. “Phil, I love you,” he gasped at some point, the words lost to Phil’s mouth as he gasped against Dan, hips shifting but doing their best not to move just yet.

Their bodies fit together perfectly, a symphony seeming to rise in Dan, purrs escaping him and his heart beating fast in his chest. Phil was rumbling against him, scenting at his neck, licking over his skin, teasing with his teeth like he wanted to bite, but he didn’t.

There was a ringing inside of Dan’s ears, and then Phil whispered, “Mine,” all over again, and started to move.

Dan’s body surged upwards into Phil’s at the first drag of hot cock inside of his warm walls, his core singing as Phil’s body drove in and out of him. Phil was growling at Dan, mindless, hands clenched into Dan’s sides, fingernails biting into his skin, marking Dan all over again. His teeth were bared against Dan’s neck, little huffs escaping him as he moved, all while Dan keened and mewled, wrapping his entire body around Phil’s and drawing him close.

They moved together, as best they could. Dan’s movements were frantic, Phil’s bordering on out of control, and yet it was perfect. Everything about it was perfect, wonderful, amazing, and Dan’s heart sang as Phil held him and fucked him.

One hand sank between their bodies at one point, playing with Dan’s cock. Phil’s thumb stroked over the top, at the slit, pumping the foreskin up and down to give Dan more pleasure, and then Dan felt it - Phil was panting, his body seizing up, the fast but tempered paced he’d been setting falling apart in what seemed an instant. Something… something was nuding at Dan’s entrance, growing, popping, and Dan realized it was Phil’s knot.

The alpha was going to knot him, and the idea of it left Dan brain dead.

“Please!” he cried, body seizing up on his own desire to come, “Knot me, alpha, knot me!” he begged, body surging down on Phil’s cock, begging the knot to press inside, to push past the lips of his pussy and sink straight into him, locking them together for a few moments at least.

Phil grunted in response, licking desperately at Dan’s neck, and then he pushed Dan’s head to the side and bit suddenly and surprisingly into Dan’s shoulder.

The sensation stung, wasn’t anywhere near where Dan wished it would be, and yet he knew that Phil hadn’t been able to control himself but hadn’t wanted to make a mistake. While Dan mourned the loss of bonding pheromones that should have flooded him, he was pleased to know that Phil wouldn’t allow a night of passion to take the choice away from both of them, even if he knew they both wanted it more than anything.

The right time. They were waiting for the right time, not the first time they had sex, not Dan’s heat - the right time.

Phi’s knot suddenly popped in, and Dan cried out as his body was stretched further still. Phil’s cock practically exploded inside of him, hot cum filling him up, and Dan groaned at the sensation, body craving it as his cunt bared down to take it all, squeezing every lost drop from Phil’s cock.

Phil’s hips seized up, pumped twice more, stilled. His hand stuttered over Dan’s cock, and Dan came too, spunk once again painting its way up his chest as he gasped, fucked down on Phil’s cock and stilled too.

Phil collapsed on top of Dan with a gasp.

His teeth released Dan’s shoulder.

Dan nuzzled at the top of Phil’s hair, and thought, I could live with this, with a giddy little chuckle.

He never wanted to let Phil out of his life.

 Afterwards, once they’d cleaned up and Phil had crawled into Dan’s bed stark naked to spoon against his back, Dan asked the question he’d been waiting a month to ask.

“Move in with me,” he said, voice soft, quite, a little hoarse. He was purring, the same he’d been pretty much since Phil had knotted him, pretty much since Phil had come into his life, and he didn’t even care that the words had come out more as a sleep demand.

Phil chuckled against his neck, and nuzzled in close, wet hair brushing against Dan’s bruised and aching shoulder.

He pressed a kiss against the nape of Dan’s neck, and sighed.

“I pretty much already have. I don’t see why we couldn’t make it official.”

The words made Dan grin, and he patted at Phil’s hands where it rested on Dan’s hip.

“Good. Cause I never want you to leave me again.”

Phil chuckled again.

“Never,” he promised and sealed it with one last kiss against Dan’s scent glands.

One day… he’d bite into that as well, and they’d be mated, forever.

Dan couldn’t wait.

But also, there was no hurry.

[sweetnestor]

You Look Happier | Chapter 4

university au, teamiplier + jack

platonic/romance/angst/(smut at one point but it’ll only be on ao3)

previous chapter

One of the things Jack and I had in common was that we were our best selves when it came to making videos. We brought it up during a session with Helena, then she required we do this as a trust exercise. I wasn’t exactly reluctant, but I was nervous about what would come up in the middle of this particular video.

Jack and I sat on the couch in the living room, camera and lights on us. Depending on how this went, this video would be going on YouTube, so we had to treat it as such. It was also going to be viewed by Helena, who was going to go in depth at our next session.

“Hey, it’s Bella!” I greeted. “Today, I’m doing something that a lot of you requested, which is the best friend tag! And as of… last year, my best friend is…”

I gestured to Jack, and he put his arms up in the air.

“It’s me.” He smiled before putting his arms back down. “Y’know we first met around this time last year?”

“Really?” I asked, surprised. “Jesus Christ. Actually, that brings us to the first question: how and when did we meet?”

“Ah, it was a bright and sunny morning,” Jack began, “in nineteen fifty four…”

I giggled. “Yeah, basically. Feels like we’ve been friends for a lifetime. It was last year, first day of the spring semester, Mark introduced us.”

“You were so shy,” Jack said fondly. “Aw, that car ride was-”

“Quiet and anxiety inducing,” I finished with a laugh. “But I thought you were really kind.”

“Aww.”

Next question: what’s your favorite memory together?

We sat there and thought about it. Jack was the first to speak.

“I liked the time we went to The Tube,” he said. “Where we drank a lot and someone had to come pick us up.”

“Oh yeah,” I said. “That was fun. I think I like… that time I was sad and you let me do your makeup.”

I was starting to understand why Helena made us do this. Remembering little moments made me feel a huge rush of affection for Jack. My heart was already swelling.

“Describe each other in one word,” he read off my phone.

We looked at each other in thought. I wasn’t sure what to expect from this prompt. What was I to Jack?

“Welcoming,” I answered, deciding to go first this time. “You always treat people the best you can, and you always try to make everyone comfortable. I don’t know, the energy you give off is always kind and warm. You’re just full of good vibes.”

Jack was smiling ear to ear. “I think Helena was right to make us do this.” He paused and then faced the camera again. “My word for you is passionate. You care so much about everything you do. You’re so passionate about your viewers, LGBTQ rights, mental health, makeup.”

The moment was sinking in. But to keep myself from crying, I read the next question.

“What’s one thing you don’t know about each other? Here we go, it’s time to get deep.”

There was another moment of silent thinking, though I knew what my confession would be. I had thought about it plenty of times, and Jack seemed like the only person I could tell.

“Um, I fart a lot in my sleep,” Jack said jokingly.

I chuckled. “I knew that already.”

“Well, I guess you know everything about me!”

“Okay, well I can’t tell them,” I began, gesturing to the camera, “but I’ll tell you.” I hesitated. “You’re probably not gonna believe me.”

“What is it? Just tell me.”

“Santiago isn’t my real last name.”

Jack was silent at first, looking like he was trying to see right through me. He let out a small laugh in disbelief. “No way.”

“I’m serious,” I told him. “I swear, honest to god. I legally changed my last name to Santiago a little bit after moving out of my parents’ house.”

“So what was your real last name?”

“Sanchez,” I said, and then added, “I just didn’t want to be tied to them anymore. Plus, it’s a super generic Mexican last name, and I didn’t really want to be generic.”

“Yeah, I get it.” Jack nodded. “Wow… Bella Sanchez.”

I chuckled at the sound of it. “She’s dead, I don’t know her.”

The next few questions were just guessing each other’s favorite whatever’s. Those were easy and left plenty of room for banter.

“Three things I always carry with me?”

“Easy. Phone, car keys, and whatever lipstick you’re wearing that day.”

“See? This is the kind of man I need! Okay, what nicknames do we have for each other?”

Jack giggled as he sat up. “Let’s see, you were Bella, then Bellers. Then fuckin’ Baller. Nervous Ball, Tiny Ball.”

“You give good nicknames,” I commented. “I have none for you, though.”

“I have enough for the both of us.” He took my phone and read, “Strengths and weaknesses.”

This was definitely going somewhere else. I should mention that Helena picked out the questions for us. She obviously had specific things she wanted us to bring up.

“Bella Santiago. Strength: sharp eyeliner. Weakness: people,” Jack announced, still joking around.

“Well you’re not wrong,” I said. “Let’s see, for you… I think your strength is… remaining humble. Like, you’ve made it so far, you’ve accomplished so much, and none of it has gone to your head.”

“Aw… can I change my answer?”

“And a weakness…” I paused, actually stumped for once. “Hmm…”

“Confrontation,” he admitted. “That’s a tough one.”

Helena was going to have a grand ol’ session with us, that’s all I knew.

“Last question,” Jack went on as he took my phone, “what do you admire most about each other? Oh, that’s easy. Well, you talked about it on your channel, but uh… you were in a very bad situation when you were, what? Eighteen? And you took the initiative to pack everything up and start a new life. You found a way out, even when you thought you couldn’t. And that’s very admirable.”

I let out a strangled, whiney noise. I wanted to cry at his words. Not knowing what else to do, I hugged Jack from the side in a somewhat silly way. “I love yooouuu!”

When I let him go, I took things seriously again. This was proving to be therapeutic.

“The amount of empathy you have for other people is something else,” I told him. “Like… you really can put yourself in other people’s shoes and you can feel what their feeling. I’ve told you some shit about me and we both ended up crying.”

“Your pain is my pain,” he said. “But I think that’s because we’re friends and we’ve also been in the same situation, with the breakups and all.”

“That’s true. But still. Even in your ‘Try Not to Cringe’ videos, you’re still feeling what the other person is feeling, and you’re trying to understand the situation.”

“I’m just being a decent person!”

“But you do it so well! I don’t know, you’re a good role model.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that.”

I looked at him, then at the camera. “What’s one thing you hate about your best friend? He can’t take a fucking compliment!”

Jack laughed. “Well, neither can you!”

“I know…”

~

That video went up before our next therapy session. Our followers went absolutely wild over it. It was sweet. Made me smile for a little bit.

I did cut out certain parts, though, like my last name reveal. Thankfully, instead of people speculating over it, they made it into a meme instead. Not only that, everyone seemed to like us solely as friends, so I was glad I didn’t have to stress about that anymore. I could see the internet as a safe place again.

Another thing I noticed was my subscriber count. I was dangerously close to one million, and it scared me. It was such a big number. It was intimidating, overwhelming.

I took a screenshot of my live subscriber count and tweeted it out with the caption “lmao.” My heart began to race as my mentions filled with responses. Then one particular notification made my head spin.

CrankGameplays quoted your tweet: “Go subscribe!!”

I wanted to reply in all caps, but I was even more nervous about the backlash. I mean, he brought to attention the fact that we knew each other. That, and he told his followers to subscribe to my channel. Strange, a gamer promoting a beauty guru. Not the first time it’s happened, but it was still bizarre.

“Ahh!!” I yelled out when the number on my screen rose dramatically.

Jack was currently in the shower, so he wasn’t here to talk me down from my oncoming anxiety attack. He did scream back in response, though. It was starting to become a regular occurrence within the apartment.

999,028. I wanted to shit my pants, and I tweeted about it. 999,057. I wanted to throw up. 999,102. Jack finally joined the show.

“Did I miss it?” he asked excitedly as he barged into my room. “Did you hit it yet? Man, I should have brought party poppers or something!”

“Almost there!” I told him, anxiously picking at my nails.

Jack came over and sat next to me on the bed. He pulled out his phone and opened up Twitter. Not long after that, I had another notification of another quoted tweet. The live count rose rapidly right then, and I began flailing my hands around hysterically.

“Ahh, what the fuck?” I exclaimed.

999,921. I opened up Snapchat. I recorded the screen and let out a stressful noise. Jack screamed along with me as the number got higher.

I nearly burst into tears when it got to one million. Jack jumped onto the bed and cheered. I quickly tweeted out a thank you in caps lock, my hands shaking from all the excitement.

“WTF THE FCUK IM NT CRYIGNG YOU AR E TE AMO ❤💓💖💗💘💙💚💛💜💝🖤💕💞”

Suddenly, Jack tackled me in a side hug, nearly knocking me off the bed. “I’m so proud of you, Bellers.”

I couldn’t help but think that I literally could have been dead in this moment. I could have been dead for almost six months, and I wouldn’t have been here to see this. Life is wild.

~

Later that night, I was able to see Ethan. I did have to pick him up at the office, though… and I had to park somewhere down the road. I felt like a stalker fangirl, waiting for my YouTube crush to come out of the building so I could kidnap him.

Ugh, crush. I felt like I was sixteen, stricken with lovesick emotions. My chest was constantly warm, and my stomach was always full of butterflies. I had Cupid’s arrow in my ass, and now I couldn’t see anything except the hearts circling my head, and the guy who gave me all these gross, mushy feelings.

Those feelings intensified when I spotted him leaving the building. Just seeing Ethan a distance away made me grin like an idiot. He spotted my car and walked over, holding a balloon in his hand. When he got closer to the car, I looked towards the building, just to make sure that none of his friends/coworkers had followed him. It was short, but I didn’t see anything. I turned my attention back to Ethan when he got in the car.

“Hey,” he greeted, “I got you this.”

He struggled slightly to pull in the single purple balloon. It only made my heart sing more.

“What for?” I asked.

“‘Cause you hit a milestone today,” he told me.

I blushed. Thank god he couldn’t see me in the dark. “That’s sweet.”

Ethan pushed the thing into the backseat before I drove off. Today, we decided to go up to Hollywood Hills. It was better for us to go at night because there were far less people, and neither of us were busy at this hour. I had to have him navigate though, because neither of us had been up there before. Thankfully, we got there without any extra difficulty, aside from the usual traffic.

It was quite a walk up to where we wanted to go. There was a specific view we wanted to find, and honestly, I was not a hiker. But this was mainly Ethan’s idea, and I was willing to do whatever he wanted, despite the underlying bout of nerves.

“Is this high enough?” he asked when we reached a certain landing.

I looked out at the view. It was all black with many dots of light. I wasn’t one for heights, but since the elevation was blocked out by the darkness, it wasn’t as scary. The stars in the sky were covered by the busy, neverending lights of the city. My legs were sore, and I was out of breath, so I nodded in response and went to sit on a nearby rock.

“How long have you lived out here?” he asked me as he walked around the cliff.

Uh oh. Interrogation time.

“Two, almost three years,” I replied.

“Oh, you’ve probably seen a lot of the city, haven’t you?” he guessed.

I chuckled, and rubbed my hands together nervously. “If you count my skill of handling traffic from driving so much, then yes.”

“Wait, really?”

“Yeah, I don’t really get out much.” I could tell this was going to bring on an awkward pause, so I quickly added, “but what about you? Are you liking it here so far?”

“Yeah, absolutely,” he said. “I, uh, I miss my family a lot, though. It still feels weird being so far away.”

“Aw, I know,” I said, even though I really didn’t. “You get used to it. At least you really get to value the time you do spend with them.” Again, I didn’t know the feeling, I just heard that from other people.

“Oh yeah, I loved this last Christmas,” Ethan said, pacing around some more. “Did you get to see your family over the holidays?”

Oh god, why did he ask that? I couldn’t stop the awkward tension from arising.

“No.”

Before I could explain further, Ethan stopped in his tracks and interjected, “Oh! You mentioned at homecoming… uh, I’m sorry, we don’t have to talk about that.”

“It’s okay,” I reassured. Although, I did cringe at the mention of homecoming. I had to give him the gist of my family thing. He had to get an idea of all the emotional baggage I carried. “I have been living on my own for…” I counted on my fingers. “Six or seven years. My parents didn’t exactly like the idea of their daughter being bi, so as as soon as I turned eighteen, I left and started fresh.”

Ethan took a minute to process all of that. I could tell I made things awkward with that bit of information. There go my chances.

“Oh, I didn’t know that was the case,” he said. “I’m sorry.”

I waved it off, as always. “It was years ago, it’s no big deal.”

He nodded and continued pacing. “Were you scared when you first moved?”

I was grateful for the subject change. “Absolutely. I cried a lot when I moved out of my parents’ house, and I cried more when I moved here.” I paused. “Are you… how have you been since you moved?”

Ethan hesitated. “I don’t know how to put it. I miss my family, but I’ve also been so busy that I don’t really feel it all the time. And I miss my friends too… But YouTube is all I’ve wanted to do, and everything is taking off, so I shouldn’t be sad, right?”

“You can be sad,” I reassured. “Like, you’re far from your hometown and all your friends, it only makes sense. And chasing your dreams comes with a lot of sacrifices.”

“Yeah…” he hummed.

I was eighty percent sure I said it to him at homecoming, but I was thinking about it again: how lucky was he to have a family so good to him that he’s genuinely upset to be far away from them. I didn’t really envy him for it, though. I could see why he was feeling like this.

“D-Do you need a hug… or something?” I mumbled, but he caught it anyway.

A little smile began to etch on his face. I half meant it as a joke, but as soon as it was in the air, that was all I wanted to do. The look on Ethan’s face said the same thing, and he opened his arms.

It should have been a quick, jokey-joke hug. But as soon as I was wrapped up in his arms, I didn’t want to let go. I was supposed to be comforting him, but I felt so light and warm. His hand went down to my lower back, which sent intense feelings of heat and electricity throughout my body. I felt weirdly comfortable, and that was so rare.

Then, a bright, blinding light shone on us.

_______

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