#almost a year later after this show came out and I’m STILL finding details I haven’t seen before

[completelylusingit]

( You can see this, he cannot. )

// co-written with @nanaboo-pumpkaboo! thanks for joinin me this was alot of fun

A knocking echoed off of the door, with the dark silhouette of a man standing there visible from the light shining on his back. He waited patiently, head tilted down, hands clenched together.

‘Please don’t freak out, act calm, you don’t want to scare her’ he thought to himself, waiting.

Ceramic clinked onto the counter, an older woman lifting her head at the noise, sighing and walking out of the kitchen. “Hold on, I’m coming!” 

Walking to the door, a zorua at her heels, she pulled it open, freezing in place the moment her eyes fell on the man behind it.

“Howdy, Ma’am.” He said, biting his tongue. It hasn't been easy walking up to people and going ‘hey! I’m alive!’

“It’s uh, been a bit, sorry for the worry.”

Her brows furrowed, and it took a moment to collect herself. “..Grimshaw? But you- How- Is this real?”

“It is real, I. . . had help, getting out and coming back.” He could practically hear the playful hum of the very being that orchestrated his revival and escape, but he should really let her come to terms with the fact that he was here before he really got into the how.

For a moment, she just stood stunned, before scolding him, “Sir you worried us all sick, and the state you put my son in-” She took a breath. “I- Either way. You look like you haven’t showered in a year, and could certainly use some good food in you after- arc knows what-”

She stepped to the side, and gestured slightly aggressively. “Come in, come on.”

He took a deep breath, nodding his head. She was right to be angry, he didn’t want to worry any of them, he fully expected things to have gone better than they did, the least he could do was accept her showing of generosity.

“Thank you Miss, I appreciate the offer, I didn’t want to leave you or your family waiting so long but the walk here was quite far.” He followed her signal and stepped inside, he intended to ask about Lus but later, his mother must have had it rough this past month as well.

“I do hope your family has been well, regardless.”

“Honey, just call me Nancy, and..” she looked away from him, expression dropping slightly, “well I appreciate the well wishes.” 

Stepping around Vulpix, she made her way into the kitchen. 

“You’re lucky I hadn’t put the leftovers up yet, are you okay with combusken? There’s mashed potatoes too.” She called back into the hallway, pulling down a plate and a glass. 

“Thank you Nancy. That sounds wonderful actually, I uh.” joking about his state of being didn't seem like the best choice right now, Nancy was still probably getting used to the fact that he was alive after all.

“I appreciate it, sounds a lot better than what I’ve been grilling on the way here.”

After she’d put the leftovers on the plate and filled the glass with water, she brought it back out and handed it to him. “I worked hard on that so you better appreciate it.”

“Come on, don’t just stand around in the hallway.” She gestured for him to follow and led the way into the living room.  

He took hold of the plate and the glass, making his way into the living room, finding a place to sit down and dig in.

“Trust me, I will, I hold these gifts in my heart much longer than you may think, hope your tupperware came back clean enough by the way.” He was careful with how he ate, not wanting to spill anything and not wanting to horrify his host a second time with ravenous eating habits.

“Thank you again.” 

Leaning against the arm of the couch, she tipped her head with a bit of a smile. “No problem, honey, and don’t worry about the tupperware, I usually don’t get them back, it’s fine.”

She paused for a moment. “..How long has it been? Since- well. I’m not sure exactly what I’d call it. And- why are you here? For any reason?” 

“Nearly a month, it was almost March when-” Might still be a touchy subject, he tilted his hat downwards. He’d keep the details vague if it came up.

“It’s been a bit, I’ve been letting people know I’m alive, I was just in Nuvema last week to let my family know. She- my mother, she really let me have it with how much I worried her.” It really was one hell of a walk thinking about it, just about as far from Anville as you can get.

“I still have others to tell, once I’m done here. Ideally y’all would have known sooner.” His fork clinked against the ceramic as he chopped up the food to eat it.

“I’m not sure how we would’ve, I don’t know what happened but Lus.. well. Anyway, I can see why your mother would act that way!” She said a bit exasperated, “If either of my kids died I’d-..” trailing off, she looked at the floor. “..Well. I don’t know what I’d do.”

She smiled a bit sadly, “That’s just how it is as a parent.” 

“You've done a good job with your kid, I can see where he gets his heart from.” The air was getting a little tense, he was admittedly worried about Lus too, but at the very least her phrasing was finally some confirmation that Lus was still alive. He gave a sigh of relief.

“Can't be easy, I'm sure every parent could write a book how hard it is.”

She sighed. “Dragons above I could. He certainly has a way to worry me.”

“Just hope he's doing alright, with school and all.”

The conversation continued on to other things, the noise drifting upstairs. 

Laying on his bed, Lus perked up from his phone. That was weird, nobody was supposed to be over today. Sitting up, he listened closer. It was definitely talking though. 

“It’s okay, Dusky. Stay here, bud.” The little purrloin rolled onto his side, meowing. Lus pet him between the ears before getting up to investigate the commotion. At the top of the stairs, he called down.

“Mom! Who are you talkin’ to? Who’s there?” 

She called back, “Hold on a second, baby!”

Well that was just great. 

“Oh he's here? Is it break already? I knew it was soon but I didn't know the date.” he recognized the voice, and an entire feeling of relief washed over him.

Nancy smiled, “Oh, yeah. He.. came a little early for spring break.”

The old stairs creaked under Lus’s feet as he came down. It was late as shit, who could possibly be over?

Okay, Mom was in the living room. He could see her from the bottom of the stairs, but that was it. He crossed the hall, came to the threshold and- 

Stopped dead in his tracks. 

“Hey, uh kid” that man sounded like him, he sure looked like him, that man placed down the plate and glass and even stood up like him. 

He took his hat off and placed it where he was sitting, there in Lus' living room, was Silas.

“Long time no see.”

For a long moment, Lus couldn’t move, he couldn’t even breathe. 

How- But- Did she lie? No, there was a funeral. He was- and yet- He was dreaming. He had to be dreaming, none of this was real. That had to be it. 

He just stared, wide-eyed, his breathing picking up.  “I- What?”

“It's a long story, I had help getting out of that fancy hole they dug for me, but I'm out, and I'm here.” He could see the kid's breath was picking up. It was understandable, but he had to keep him from fully freaking out.

“Deep breaths kiddo, are you alright?” 

His hands lifted to his face, breath shaky, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. “I- Is this- Fuck- No it can’t-” 

He closed his eyes, rubbing his face. When he opened them again, he couldn’t look away. “Is it- It’s really you. Right? Holy fuck- It’s really you.”

“It's really me, I'm sorry for the fright I gave you and your mom.” It hurt to see Lus get so teary eyed, he could only imagine how rough he'd had it this last month. But he was gonna try to make it up to him.

A smile spread across his face, he couldn't help but laugh a little, very happy to see his friend again.

“It's, really good to see y'all.”

Okay yeah Lus started crying properly. He took a step forward, unsure of what he was allowed to do. 

Covering his mouth with his hand, he choked back a sob. "I- I- fuck I missed you."

“Ahhh don’t do that you’re gonna make me cry too kid!” Silas stepped towards Lus as well, arms outstretched. 

He practically fell into him, burying his face in his shirt. Fuck it hurt, but not in a bad way. He couldn't speak anymore, he just cried.

Silas held onto Lus, practically lifting him off the ground, laughing or what sounded like laughing. Lus might’ve even felt his hair get a little more damp as Silas hugged him.

After a moment he started laughing too, from the absurdity of it all, from the fucking relief. Lus looked up at him and smiled, for the first time since he saw him. His voice was still choked, tears running down his face, dampening Silas’s shirt, but once he could get his breath back, he tried anyway. 

“They couldn’t keep ya down, could they? They fuckin’ tried, and here you are!” 

“Ha ha! Yeah, here I am. They’re gonna be pissed when they figure it out.” He set Lus back down onto the ground, giving him a chance to breathe. Silas wiped his own eyes with his sleeves.

“Let ‘em be pissed! I don’t care.” Lus buried his face into his shoulder, voice muffled. “I’m just.. You’re here. That’s all I care about. Never fuckin’ do that again.”  

“Don’t worry buddy, I’m not doing anything that fuckin’ risky again. Things are gonna start getting better.” He patted Lus on the back, and for once in the many times he’s said that, he was sure of himself.

Taking a step back, Lus wiped his face. Arc he must’ve looked awful, but who cares. After taking a moment to breathe, he looked back at him. “So.. how long have you been..?” He gestured slightly with a hand. 

“Uhh, I think I dug myself out, what? The night of the 9th? It took so long to get here cause I have just been trying to let everyone know I made it out of that hole.” He paused, ‘should I really bring up I stopped by his campus to look for that thing? Best to leave that part out.’

Lus’s eyes widened, and Nancy, who’d been off to the side, gasped, speaking up for the first time since he’d come down. “Wait they- you were really buried? But how then- Oh twin spirits.” 

While after a moment, Lus spoke quietly, “Shit- has it really been that long? Why didn’t- Oh fuck.” He ran a hand over his face. 

“Ah, yes that uh must sound rather strange, I have a good expli- what. What happened to you?” His eye darted to Lus' scar, and all that relief he had felt was replaced with worry.

“What? Oh.” Lightly he ran a finger over the bandage still on his forehead, wincing slightly. “Well, uh..” 

Glancing over at his mom a few feet away, he lowered his voice. “Uh- well, something happened back at my dorm, but- I’m fine I made it out, it’s fine. Scary as shit, but- it’s okay.” 

Yeahhh neither of them were gonna believe that. 

‘Made it out’ he looked to that bandage, and thought back to those messages when he was buried, to the fox from a month ago, to that figure close by Silas barely caught sight of at the front door.

“Kid, it's alright, you can tell us what happened.”

“No, it’s fine, I don’t want y’all gettin’ worked up over this. I can handle it.” He gave a bit of an uncertain smile, “I promise.”

Taking a glance at his mom, she was fidgeting with her sleeve with the opposite hand, but he could tell she wasn’t sure what to say.

“Alright… but, you know we worry for you, yeah?” 

“Yeah, yeah I know-” He glanced back at him, catching a flash of white out of the corner of his eye-

And he nearly screamed.

[taybatwo2]

G3 Hissfits Review Part 1

Guess what came in today??? My Hissfits three pack!

The box is large, 22”x12” and was 75 bucks…which is a lot (25 for each doll) and Entertainment Earth wanted another 20 for shipping (so I might have preordered a cute little 3.75” Clone Trooper Rex figure to get free shipping).

These dolls had their stock photos dropped a bit over a year ago and I guess were just sitting in a warehouse while Mattel figured out what to do with them????? I dunno why they took so long to come out, but I’m glad they were not all canceled and disposed of.

It has some little Skullettes detailed around the outside of the box.

Here is the corner illustration done by Darko.

The back of the box. That’s a huge illustration and looks really cool. It has some of their accessories hidden about and Amped Up Frankie’s accessories in the far left-hand book shelf. Perhaps they’re all playing for the Monster Ball?

Here is the UPC for anyone who needs it. These are supposed to be available on misc. sellers/shops: like Entertainment Earth and Big Lots and NOT Amazon, Walmart, Target or even Mattel Creations. Which seems like an odd choice (I wonder what their reasoning was behind it?).

Here is a close up of their blurb on the back of the box. I do find it funny that Toralei was known to be REALLY bad at singing in G1 and G3 just RAN the other way with that.

Here are the ghoul’s with the plastic removed. There was A TON of rubber bands holding them all in. They look good in the package, but there is so much plastic waste.

more under the cut

Close-up of G3 Meowlody’s face while still strapped down. Meowlody has white hair (I remember who is who by: turning her name’s first letter “m” upside down and it looks like a “w” for “white hair”).

Mine has her eyes slightly printed up too high, some white paint dropped across her right eye, and her left cheek stripes have some paint missing (you can’t tell from his photo).

She has the biggest grin out of the werecat twins and Toralei. Her heterochromia is opposite of her twin and she has purple leopard print eyeshadow. Her hair feels like saran.

My Toralei looks pretty good, but has a small lip smudge on her upper lip. I love her eyeshadow!!! Even her bright pink lips have grown on me. Her leopard rosettes are a mix of purple (Meowlody) and pink (Purrsephone).

She has almost-neon orange hair (with black, baby pink, and purple streaks). I’m pretty sure it is all saran.

And my FAVORITE, Purrsephone (turn her name’s first letter “p” upside down and it looks like a “b” for “black hair” and that’s how I remember this is Purrsephone). I like her sculpted eyelids, her full upper lips, her hair color blend *mwah!* Mine does have a spot of red paint on the bottom of her cat nose. She has pink leopard spots on the opposite side of her face as her sister.

I’m also certain she has saran hair.

They come with a ton of little accessories “to help them get ready for the show.” Even merch to sell after the show too!!

After spending about 30 minutes freeing everything from their prison and running a metal comb through their hair (they will need to be washed with water, Dawn dish soap, and some conditioner…maybe (carefully) straight iron their hair later).

I forgot to take a full body photo of Toralei before I started removing pieces. Whoops!

Here is her crown piece. It wraps around both ears and should still hold its place fairly well even after I removed the plastic stays and rubberband (it was really wrapped around it) holding it in.

Here she is without her golden crown. I might like it better off.

Her eye make-up is her two cousins’ mixed together. Oh, by the way G3 Purrsephone and Meowlody are G3 Toralei’s cousins, not just her beasties.

The leopard print reminds me of SDCC DC Super Hero Girl’s Cheetah.

Her tail tambourine (I love how clever they were in its paw-like design) also stays on her tail pretty well.

Here are her plastic dress pieces. They have some nice details to them (lots of studs, chains, and the Hissfits cat head logo) and as always, could look even more elevated with some paint. Be warned that the gold chest piece instantly wants to keep detaching itself from the skirt and shoulder pieces after you remove the rubber bands.

I LOVE her gloves (look at the little printed seams and how they make it look like there are seperate holes for her fingers). My Core G3 Toralei will be stealing them. Mine even come off by sliding over the hands (you do not necessarily need to remove the whole hand to get them off).

Here are her MASSIVE boots. They are slit all the way down the back and have some colored in details. I’m not sure if I like purple AND pink AND red being Toralei’s new colors, but these shoes look great.

Here are the bottoms (chains on the ball of the feet and a cat scratching post making the heel).

A better look at her saran hair blend. It’s really growing on me. I was just going to clean her up, steal her stock and resell the base doll. But I am heavily rethinking it.

Here she is in her outfit sans all the plastic bits. It is all attached. The main shirt/shorts have a sparkly foil look to them and her skirt has a lovely gold to magenta foil print.

And the back. Now let’s jump ahead to look at some differences between the werecat’s bodies.

Toralei has the exact same body mold as G3 Clawdeen, and the werecat twins have the same body as G3 Cleo (sans the bandages).

They didn’t give the werecat twins sharp toe claws like Toralei and Clawdeen. :( Booo!

Their ears look a bit different too (Toralei has notches in the bottom of her ears and Purrsephone/Meowlody don’t).

And for funsies. Here are all the G3 werecats’ body types for comparison (I’m still in the middle of micro-braiding my Catty’s hair, so ignore her bad hair day).

In part 2 I’ll delve more into the werecat twins.

[count-alucard-tepes]

Our favorite phoenix, Marco🦅 wins the poll!

🌶️Headcanons🌶️

He dates all ages and all races, if he finds you interesting, he’s gonna be all over you and he’s so smooth about it too.

He loves his partner to be in charge in their relationship and in the bedroom. It’s a turn on.

He likes tall (OP standards) and thicc partners, men or women, big boobs, thicc thighs and big ass…you’ve caught Marco’s attention.

The drapes do not match the carpet😆😉

Marco is never single…he’s always got someone on his mind, on his D or something. He’s just not the type of guy who is single single if you know what I mean.

Fanfiction for our cutie Marco🦅

A note was left on Marco’s quarters door that he would be out for a few hours but he didn’t give too much details as he was off to get his hair done. His grey hairs were finally showing and well he need to get a hair cut too.

He got to barbershop the Whitebeard pirates frequented and greeted everyone as he walked in with a big smile.

“…the usual then, Marco?”, the owner asked with a smile.

“Yes…my age is finally starting to show”, he said teasingly.

“…you still look like the young man who walked through my doors 20 years ago…take a seat and I’ll get you a hot towel”, he said gently before disappearing in the back.

Marco took a seat and relaxed for a bit before the barber came in and wrapped a hot towel on his face, “…I got one of my best to take care of you today…try not to burn them”, the barber said playfully.

Marco chuckled in response, “…I’ll try not to”.

His face with still covered with the towel when someone else would come and draped a cape over him.

“…okay, so I’ll be doing your hair today, I’m Y/N by the way”, they said as they ran their fingers through his hair slowly.

“…that’s a beautiful name, I’m in your care”, he replied as he enjoyed the feeling of their fingers running through his hair, it made him relax even more.

Y/N smiled a little as they looked down at the man with his face wrapped in a hot towel, “…so just the roots and a haircut?”, they asked gently.

“Yes and a shave later on…”, he replied.

“…got it…I’ll be right back”, Y/N said as they went to get some product and their tools.

Marco waited patiently before he would feel them start trimming his hair and shaving it to his usual style.

The towel was then removed and it took some time for his eyes to adjust before he slipped on his glasses just so he could see Y/N. His jaw dropped a little as he looked at their reflection in the mirror in front of him.

“…is the length okay or do we want to go shorter?”, they asked as they ran their fingers through his hair again just to show him and make sure he was satisfied.

“Y-yes…it’s perfect”, he said as he gulped a little.

Y/N smiled and nodded, “…I’ll start with your color then”.

During the entire process, he couldn’t take his eyes off Y/N. They really peaked his interest.

“So, Y/N…you’ve been doing hair for a while then?”, he asked out of curiosity.

“…not really but it’s something I’m good at so I thought starting a career in it wouldn’t be a bad idea”, Y/N replied gently with a smile.

“Yes, you’re very good if you get to work here…the owner has quite the interesting clientele…”, Marco said with a weak smile.

“…a very interesting clientele”, Y/N replied with a smirk.

He chuckled in response, “…are you from this island?”.

“Born and raised…”, Y/N replied gently as they began his close shave.

“…hmm…you must know where to get the best meals then”, he murmured, trying to be as still as possible so that they didn’t cut him by accident.

“I do…it’s not too far from here too”, they said gently, “….maybe after I’m done with your hair, I could take you there…it’s almost my lunch break anyway”.

“Oh yeah? That sounds fun…”, he said with a smile as he internally grinned even more.

Once his hair was all done, he thanked Y/N and paid the owner before waiting out for them so that they could go for lunch together.

Y/N came out in no time and walked with him to local restaurant that apparently had the best food. They ordered their meals and some drinks.

“…so I’ve heard you’re from the Whitebeard pirates…is he really as cool as everyone around here says he is?”, Y/N asked as they sipped their drink.

“Oyaji? Yeah, he’s amazing! You should meet him sometime…he comes here every now and then”, Marco said with a big smile, clearly very fond of his father-figure and captain.

“…I’ve always been a little nervous…don’t want to be too bold or rude with someone like that”, they admitted.

“…he likes bold people, so just be yourself and tell him you’ll do his hair for free”, he said teasingly.

Y/N blushed at that and then laughed at the realization of what he just said, “…and you’re certain I wouldn’t get killed for saying that?! You’re the worst”.

Marco chuckled in response, “…alright, let’s not say that then…I might have to save you if you do”.

Y/N smiled a little in response, “…you might just have to…”.

He looked into their eyes and leaned in a little more, “…hey, are you free next weekend? We’ll be visiting the island…and I’d like to see you again”.

He needed to shoot his shot before he lost his opportunity!

“Yeah, we could go dancing…I hope you’re light on your feet”, Y/N said with a smile.

“…you have no idea…it’s a date then”, he said with a smile.

((I live for Marco fanfics!😍))

[revanchistsuperstar]

Think I got a delayed emotional reaction to OFMD season two because I just started crying HARD listening to This Woman’s Work on the way home from the gay bar tonight. Weepy sad faggot details beneath the cut:

I’ve already said mentioned sort of not explicitly in the tags of a lot of posts what I’ve been going through the last few months but this is a fucking boiling point so let’s get into it.

I kissed a random man at the club tonight. He was gorgeous. He ticked every box I could think to have ticked. Otter, but a bit (lot) fruity. We were at a bear bar, I saw my friends do an awesome drag show, I was having a wonderful, happy time. Got flirted with and desired by a random man, the only thing I as a gay trans man have ever wanted. Almost was like “please, just take me home and fuck me” but he was off to another club and I didn’t feel like comitting to the bit as they say. Because here is the sad truth.

Ketan is the only person I’ve been able to see myself with for months. I love him. I hate that I do, but I do. He kissed me like I literally have never been kissed by a man before, this cisgender gay man, kissed me like I was the most beautiful, desirable man he’s ever known. We’ve known each other for

Eight years.

I’m absolutely not monogamous. I’ve had feelings for other men during the time I’ve had feelings for Ketan. This crush came on when I was still with my ex fiancée, I’ve felt this way for YEARS.

But the mother fucker had to kiss me, make me feel worthy of something for the first time in my life, say “I know,” when I told him I’d felt this way about him for years and kiss me again harder after our lips pulled apart that first time, keep kissing me that whole night over and over and over, and then pull a 180 and suddenly become too scared to talk to me ever again and tell me he was heartbroken and he couldn’t deal with this, when he was the one who came on to ME, because I as a gay trans man am so convinced every cis gay finds me repulsive I’ve never even made a Grindr despite desperately wanting to be dicked down most every day and night.

He had to say “you should have told me how you felt. I still might have done this but I would have been prepared” but then completely ghost me for an entire month.

He had to refuse to discuss it to the point that seven months later I still am so fucking confused I don’t even know how to explain to our mutual friends what the fuck happened.

And now here I am. Kissing a random, beautiful man but thinking of him. Thinking about how insane I went when he wasn’t talking to me at all, how I nearly lost my job because I was so suicidally depressed I would wake up every day and have my first thought be “I don’t want to be alive.”

I should be hoping, but I can’t stop thinking.

The fucking OCD mood.

This weird part of me keeps thinking “you two are meant to be together in the end, just be patient, this is the love of a lifetime and nobody has ever made you feel like this before, you two literally can talk to each other with just looks, every single damn thing about your lives is a mirror of one another, this is fate, this is a higher power doing this” but the rational part of me is so, SO fucking upset and hurt STILL and I hate both of these parts of me and I just don’t know what to do besides cry and dare to hope this might work out like it does on TV.

I miss you so much, Ketan. You’re literally only a few hundred feet away, posting “dinner for one” on your IG story, and I’m so much of a coward I can’t even text you and tell you what I feel.

And there has to be a god damn fucking tv show starring my COUSIN who LOOKS LIKE ME making it easy to project with a song that I’ve loved for years and just cuts to my core because it could be about US and I’m driving home from the club when I should be so over the moon that I got to kiss some dude who was so beautiful I’m just crying instead and…

Ketan I miss you so much. Why the fuck is this so triggering and so hard.

[smokeybrandreviews]

Love Struck

It’s been a while since I've had an manga recommendation worth writing about. I feel like I've been neglecting that aspect of my blog, mostly because finding the time to actually sit down and write out something on these things is kind of a pain right now. Life has been getting in the way pretty regularly because of course it would, which is kind of frustrating because this blog is kind of how i wind down from life you know? It’s this, movies, and games. Those are how i relax. It’s an odd thing to say when I'm basically critiquing and generally hyper-focusing on stuff enough to write a relatively detailed breakdown about it but, you know, neurodivergence! Either way, there are a few manga that have caught my attention and i finally have the time to sit and gush about them. Prepare for a deluge if manga recommends in the coming weeks because i have a ton of them. To start off, i want to talk  a little bit about Eiyuu to Kenja no Tensei Kon. Now, this blog is chock full of Isekai recommends because there are just SO many Isekai out the right now. A lot of them are trash, can’t eve begin to front about that, but there are a few gems in there.

Technically, Reincarnated • The Hero Marries the Sage ~After Becoming Engaged to a Former Rival, We Became the Strongest Couple~, isn’t an Isekai but it still hits all of those tropes. It’s more a Reincarnated type story, but even those are just Isekai tropes without the inherent Isekai triggers. Still, the strength of this particular take on those tropes, is the fact that they are just thematic in nature and take a backseat, almost immediately, to the characters, themselves. Eiyuu is about the Hero of the human Kingdom of Altein, Reid and the Sage of the Elf Kingdom of Vegalta, Elria, who clashed against each other in many battles before passing away, then being born again into a brand new world a thousand years into the future. They retained their memories, and insanely overpowered abilities, but have never lost that competitive nature or yearning for peace. A millennia later, the world they left behind, that world of malicious strife, has finally found rest and these two were given the opportunity to fully experience that peace they so longed for, so many years ago. This story isn’t about our two protagonist continuing their friendly rivalry. It’s not about two, wildly overpowered, people trying to change the world. No, it’s abut two friends, who happen to be the strongest in history, finding each other after crossing time, itself, and rekindling that intimacy into something more. It’s basically a slow burn romance comedy that just happens to star a reincarnated Hero and Sage. That’s why i love it so much.

Now, I'm a sucker for this content, straight up. I love fantasy. Eiyuu is set in a fantasy world. I love romance. It’s very obvious this narrative is going toward that direction. I mean, the name has “Married” right in the title. The thing is, though, this sh*t i adorable! Like, the characters, themselves, are an absolute delight to read! That first chapter, alone, was more than enough to hook me and that’s rare. It usually takes three or four to really get me to commit but no! That first chapter told me exactly who these characters were, where they were going to go, and how the world, itself, functions. I read those scant thirty-one pages and was immediately captivated by the narrative presents. Like, i needed that next chapter, immediately. All credit has to go to Fujiki Washiro for that. Cat came through and promptly showed his skill but giving us, as readers, so much in so little space. thirty pages is nothing and yet, here i am, spilling my guts about his story. That makes since considering their bread and butter is in the light novel. Reincarnated doesn’t have a light novel counterpart but, considering how deftly it’s written, you wouldn’t know it. I’m curious if this earnest way of telling stories is found in their other works, like Holy Swordsman's Magic Sword ~Because I became the master of a lonely and healthy demon sword, I will do my best to love it~ ? Might be worth looking into later. Now, I'm a sucker for solid writing but i have the aforementioned light novels for that. What sets manga apart from those i the art and i can say that Eiyuu has some of the best I've seen in a while.

The very first thing i noticed, in that very first panel, was the use of movement. I know that sounds absurd because it’s a static picture but, if you know anything about comics, there ways to make that happen and Nishi Riku really understands how to execute them. You can absolutely see those energy waves crashing around our protagonist while those magic formulas do their thing above. It is everything a splash page, a taste of what’s to come, should be but it doesn’t stop there. The action sequences are fantastic and feel properly devastating. You believe the damage done or the force of impact going forward. There is weight to these character designs and a realism caught up in this fantastical world. I love the whimsy and how the levity in the script is capture with Riku’s lines. There are legitimate examples of deadpan humor which are conveyed in a very direct, very theatrical, manner. This is particularly impressive considering that, you know, it’s conveyed through a goddamn comic book! This is all the more impressive when you take into account the this is Nishi Riku’s first work! Like, i can’t find anything else they’ve done! What?? How did this gem of an artist go unsung for so long?? Actually, i take that back. They have one credit under their belt, Oda Nobunaga to Iu Nazo no Shokugyou ga Mahou Kenshi yori Cheat Datta node, Oukoku wo Tsukuru Koto ni Shimashita, but that’s credited under Nishirikyuu so maybe not?

Listen, i love this book so much. Eiyuu to Kenja no Tensei Kon is one of the few manga i read, for which i track updates. It’s just that good and I'm just that hooked. Never mind that it’s premise is a bit derivative and smacks of Isekai tropes, the character work, world building, overall writing, and exceptional art, more than make up for it’s overall tropiness. It rivals Chillin Different World Life Of The Ex-Brave Candidate Was Cheat From Lv2!, Ryuu to Ayumu Nariagari Boukensha-dou ~ Youzumi toshite S-Rank Party kara Tsuihou Sareta Kaifuku Majutsushi, Suterareta Saki de Saikyou no Shinryuu wo Fukkatsu Sasete Shimau ~ !, Nito no Taidana Isekai Shoukougun, Tensei Shitara Ken Deshita, Isekai Shikkaku, Kajiya De Hajimeru Isekai Slow Life, and Isekai Mokushiroku Mynoghra, as day-one favorites. The second these things drop, i am all over them and they have yet to disappoint. The other titles i just mentioned are both excellent and worth a read but they have a few chapters on Eiyuu. My darling fantasy romance is only four chapters in but it’s split into parts, so that count is more realistically at six or seven. We’re still waiting on part two of chapter four. I hate when they do that but it does keep you on edge for however long it takes for an update. Reincarnated • The Hero Marries the Sage ~After Becoming Engaged to a Former Rival, We Became the Strongest Couple~ is an exceptional read and i highly recommend giving it a shot. You won’t be disappointed!

[smokeybrand]

Love Struck

It’s been a while since I've had an manga recommendation worth writing about. I feel like I've been neglecting that aspect of my blog, mostly because finding the time to actually sit down and write out something on these things is kind of a pain right now. Life has been getting in the way pretty regularly because of course it would, which is kind of frustrating because this blog is kind of how i wind down from life you know? It’s this, movies, and games. Those are how i relax. It’s an odd thing to say when I'm basically critiquing and generally hyper-focusing on stuff enough to write a relatively detailed breakdown about it but, you know, neurodivergence! Either way, there are a few manga that have caught my attention and i finally have the time to sit and gush about them. Prepare for a deluge if manga recommends in the coming weeks because i have a ton of them. To start off, i want to talk  a little bit about Eiyuu to Kenja no Tensei Kon. Now, this blog is chock full of Isekai recommends because there are just SO many Isekai out the right now. A lot of them are trash, can’t eve begin to front about that, but there are a few gems in there.

Technically, Reincarnated • The Hero Marries the Sage ~After Becoming Engaged to a Former Rival, We Became the Strongest Couple~, isn’t an Isekai but it still hits all of those tropes. It’s more a Reincarnated type story, but even those are just Isekai tropes without the inherent Isekai triggers. Still, the strength of this particular take on those tropes, is the fact that they are just thematic in nature and take a backseat, almost immediately, to the characters, themselves. Eiyuu is about the Hero of the human Kingdom of Altein, Reid and the Sage of the Elf Kingdom of Vegalta, Elria, who clashed against each other in many battles before passing away, then being born again into a brand new world a thousand years into the future. They retained their memories, and insanely overpowered abilities, but have never lost that competitive nature or yearning for peace. A millennia later, the world they left behind, that world of malicious strife, has finally found rest and these two were given the opportunity to fully experience that peace they so longed for, so many years ago. This story isn’t about our two protagonist continuing their friendly rivalry. It’s not about two, wildly overpowered, people trying to change the world. No, it’s abut two friends, who happen to be the strongest in history, finding each other after crossing time, itself, and rekindling that intimacy into something more. It’s basically a slow burn romance comedy that just happens to star a reincarnated Hero and Sage. That’s why i love it so much.

Now, I'm a sucker for this content, straight up. I love fantasy. Eiyuu is set in a fantasy world. I love romance. It’s very obvious this narrative is going toward that direction. I mean, the name has “Married” right in the title. The thing is, though, this sh*t i adorable! Like, the characters, themselves, are an absolute delight to read! That first chapter, alone, was more than enough to hook me and that’s rare. It usually takes three or four to really get me to commit but no! That first chapter told me exactly who these characters were, where they were going to go, and how the world, itself, functions. I read those scant thirty-one pages and was immediately captivated by the narrative presents. Like, i needed that next chapter, immediately. All credit has to go to Fujiki Washiro for that. Cat came through and promptly showed his skill but giving us, as readers, so much in so little space. thirty pages is nothing and yet, here i am, spilling my guts about his story. That makes since considering their bread and butter is in the light novel. Reincarnated doesn’t have a light novel counterpart but, considering how deftly it’s written, you wouldn’t know it. I’m curious if this earnest way of telling stories is found in their other works, like Holy Swordsman's Magic Sword ~Because I became the master of a lonely and healthy demon sword, I will do my best to love it~ ? Might be worth looking into later. Now, I'm a sucker for solid writing but i have the aforementioned light novels for that. What sets manga apart from those i the art and i can say that Eiyuu has some of the best I've seen in a while.

The very first thing i noticed, in that very first panel, was the use of movement. I know that sounds absurd because it’s a static picture but, if you know anything about comics, there ways to make that happen and Nishi Riku really understands how to execute them. You can absolutely see those energy waves crashing around our protagonist while those magic formulas do their thing above. It is everything a splash page, a taste of what’s to come, should be but it doesn’t stop there. The action sequences are fantastic and feel properly devastating. You believe the damage done or the force of impact going forward. There is weight to these character designs and a realism caught up in this fantastical world. I love the whimsy and how the levity in the script is capture with Riku’s lines. There are legitimate examples of deadpan humor which are conveyed in a very direct, very theatrical, manner. This is particularly impressive considering that, you know, it’s conveyed through a goddamn comic book! This is all the more impressive when you take into account the this is Nishi Riku’s first work! Like, i can’t find anything else they’ve done! What?? How did this gem of an artist go unsung for so long?? Actually, i take that back. They have one credit under their belt, Oda Nobunaga to Iu Nazo no Shokugyou ga Mahou Kenshi yori Cheat Datta node, Oukoku wo Tsukuru Koto ni Shimashita, but that’s credited under Nishirikyuu so maybe not?

Listen, i love this book so much. Eiyuu to Kenja no Tensei Kon is one of the few manga i read, for which i track updates. It’s just that good and I'm just that hooked. Never mind that it’s premise is a bit derivative and smacks of Isekai tropes, the character work, world building, overall writing, and exceptional art, more than make up for it’s overall tropiness. It rivals Chillin Different World Life Of The Ex-Brave Candidate Was Cheat From Lv2!, Ryuu to Ayumu Nariagari Boukensha-dou ~ Youzumi toshite S-Rank Party kara Tsuihou Sareta Kaifuku Majutsushi, Suterareta Saki de Saikyou no Shinryuu wo Fukkatsu Sasete Shimau ~ !, Nito no Taidana Isekai Shoukougun, Tensei Shitara Ken Deshita, Isekai Shikkaku, Kajiya De Hajimeru Isekai Slow Life, and Isekai Mokushiroku Mynoghra, as day-one favorites. The second these things drop, i am all over them and they have yet to disappoint. The other titles i just mentioned are both excellent and worth a read but they have a few chapters on Eiyuu. My darling fantasy romance is only four chapters in but it’s split into parts, so that count is more realistically at six or seven. We’re still waiting on part two of chapter four. I hate when they do that but it does keep you on edge for however long it takes for an update. Reincarnated • The Hero Marries the Sage ~After Becoming Engaged to a Former Rival, We Became the Strongest Couple~ is an exceptional read and i highly recommend giving it a shot. You won’t be disappointed!

[rexlottie]

🚨OFFICAL STEVEN APARTMENT LAYOUT🚨

206 page pdf with set photos, concept art and episode stills from moon knight, absolutely gorgeous stuff!!!!! The cairo set is CRAZY

[abybweisse]

Hi there! I recently finished reading the Black Butler manga for the first time and I’m completely blown away!!! One thing I’m curious about and would like to know from a long-time manga reader: When did people start to seriously theorize that Ciel had a brother? I binge read the manga in less than a week and all of the foreshadowing/clues went completely over my head, so I would love to find out what made people start to get suspicious and what kind of theories started to pour in! 👀

Wow, that's a lot of reading in less than a week! I would have missed a bunch of little details, too, if I had tried that! 😯

When did 2CT start?

Well, I didn't join the fandom until sometime in 2015, and some people were already talking about various hints that there was probably a twin brother. @kurotwins and @akumadeenglish who are both not active here anymore (at least not on those blogs) we're talking about it, as well as some others I'm not as sure about. Apparently, the Japanese chunk of the fandom didn't really debate there being a twin; it was sort of accepted very early-on. It might be a matter of translation issues, like "sons" translated to "son", etc.

Anyway, I recall reading a bunch of their posts, and then I started paying more attention to a scene in ch1. Chlaus shows up with the packaging for a game called "Mouse3" by "Ninkyodo". Well, that's a parody of Mother3 by Nintendo, which was released in Japan on April 20, 2006. Unlike the previous two versions of the game, Mother3 never got localized as part of the EarthBound series. Which is why Chlaus tells our earl the "game" was so difficult to find in Italy. Of course, that packaging contains the drug evidence that our earl needed to show Scotland Yard. To put Azzurro Vanel (and potentially the Ferro family) away.

The irises are used in both Victorian flower language and Japanese flower language to mean a few different things, but one meaning they share in common is something along the lines of "I have a message for you." Well, that message is the game packaging shown on the very next page.

Mother3 is about mirror twin boys who deal with tragedy soon after their birthday (9th or 10th). Their mother is killed by a monster, and their father is so distraught about her death that he goes into a rage and end up in jail for a while. Soon after the dad gets out of (escapes from) jail, he finds out the older mirror twin had gone off by himself to kill the monster, but now he has gone missing. Everyone is searching, but no body has been found. However, the player of the game can see Claus' broken body at the bottom of a cliff. It's understood that he's dead. The main characters still don't know, though. Not for another three, almost four, years. After losing his wife and being unable to find his older son, the father becomes kind of useless. Notice that the guy in Kuroshitsuji is Chlaus, and the older twin in Mother3 is Claus.

Three years later, Lucas (younger mirror twin) is about 13 years old, and he sets off on his own quest for revenge, along with the loyal family dog, Boney. The rest of the game takes place during this one year, then it ends just before his next birthday. The last thing Lucas has to do before he can "win" is defeat his own older twin brother, who had died, been turned into a Fascinating Chimera, and had been pitted against him.

So, I started coming up with my Mother3 theory for Kuroshitsuji back in December 2015. Back then, I was already theorizing that not only is there a twin brother, but he's a mirror twin. The missing twin is older, dead, reanimated, and will pop up again as an adversary.

Soooo, idk how long some version or other of 2CT has been around, but a very specific version of it came to me (and became very serious to me) in December 2015. And it's canon now: mirror twin brothers; one lives while the other dies; the dead one is reanimated; they end up having to confront each other.

Even Sebastian gets to parallel the roles of both the loyal family dog, Boney (under contract) and the Dark Dragon who must be given your "heart" to follow your will (as the demon who demands a soul as payment).

That's why I'm so into my Mother3 theory, which started out kind of small and grew and grew... because the similarities don't stop there. Not even close. Numerous characters and plot lines have strong parallels to Mother3 characters and plot lines, while a few are better paralleled in Mother and Mother2. The timelines are essentially the same between Kuroshitsuji and Mother3, too.

Maybe check out my "Why I theorize" post and my "Masterpost 1" for more on that, to get more into it. There are several masterposts and addendums, plus a few more masterposts on the way... eventually. When I first started posting about it, I didn't expect it to be such a big finding, but here I am, still talking about it! 😆

[tuulikannel]

Akabane Karma in the official character book, p. 3-4 translation

(pages 1-2)

Here’s the last two pages for you! In this part, some of my translations are very different from the other older translation. The other one’s via Chinese, though, so that might of course cause some issues. I’m relatively certain of most of my translations, though there are baffling parts too. It’s perfectly possible (if not likely) that I have some mistakes here too. If you spot anything, please don’t hesitate to tell me!

Also, a reminder, this book came out after vol. 13, which reaches up to the school festival. So in a sense, parts of this is old info. 

Karma behind the scenes

As he is quite aloof, Karma is perceived as a little unapproachable by everyone. What kind of connections in the class does someone like him have…?!

 

Shiota Nagisa (addressed as Nagisa-kun) [though we do know this changes later]

They became close during the first year, but after the suspension in the second year they became a bit estranged.* Karma’s home is strange due to his parents’ hobbies, and Nagisa is the only one who has seen it.

[*That’s what it says, but… I thought they were estranged already before the suspension. And it was by Karma’s choice… but at this point in the manga we haven’t yet learned about that, so perhaps either Matsui hadn’t thought out all the details yet, or then he didn’t want to reveal it to the readers quite yet.]

Terasaka Ryouma (addressed as Terasaka)

With Terasaka, it’s easy to know what’ll come out when you poke him, as if you were holding him on your palm. Resonates from being hit, and the sturdiness is great.

Okuda Manami (addressed as Okuda-san)

Karma finds Okuda the kind of girl you can talk with about anything. She is also strangely not scared, which removes Karma’s wariness and the walls between them.

Isogai Yuuma (addressed as Isogai)

Isogai is worried about the dangerous Karma and voices it, but Karma himself is bad with the kind of kindness he shows.

Kanzaki Yukiko (addressed as Kanzaki-san)

Unexpectedly: gamer Karma. Having confidence that he can do almost anything better than others, one day he plays against Kanzaki who is said to be a master, but he doesn’t win.

Sugaya Sousuke (addressed as Sugaya)

Karma is still a little feared within the E class. Therefore, there are many classmates, like Sugaya, who would want to make retorts and tease him, but who take a step back.

Nakamura Rio (addressed as Nakamura)

They have conversations daily, at random places. They’re both vulgar and intelligent, and the conversations might move from extortion to world economics in three seconds.

Sugino Tomohito (addressed as Sugino)

Karma is introduced to many friends through Nagisa. With Sugino’s straightforward sporty character, even the hotblooded Karma speaks normally with the Nagisa & Sugino set. 

Asano Gakushuu (addressed as Asano-kun)

The exchange of cutting remarks is for them a declaration of fighting intent. There isn’t any indication they’d become friends, but they are both competitive, hate to lose and they also can get themselves stirred up, so they are perfect rivals.

Matsui-sensei's behind the scenes data

His parents are free spirits who’ve made a killing in day trade. They spend most of the year away from home, traveling. “Do it as soon as you think it” and “Anything goes as long as you don’t bend the core” are their pet sayings. They might not be at home, but they’re pronouncedly reflected in Karma’s personality.

[The manga panel is from where he says he likes his name and that sometimes children inherit their parents’ weird tastes.]

It might be weird to describe his parents’ personalities like this, but it’s solidly hereditary.

[lower left] Because he is provocative, quick to resort to violence, and the daily fights don’t cease, he is wary like a wild animal. His usual aloof attitude is to hide his wariness and also to keep the opponent from becoming wary.

[lower right] Karma makes tenuki* moves in assassination training in order to reach Karasuma’s weak spot. But Karasuma is better than that!

*tenuki, a move which is not a direct counter to the opponent’s last move​.

[And, done! Huh. This was actually pretty hard at times. ^^;; As I said, feel free to correct any mistakes you might spot. That includes, btw, also ones with English.]

(masterlist of my translations)

[father-time-and-baby-new-year]

happy 200! i’m so glad to see your blog grow, it’s one of my favorites and i adore all your writing. i’ve never cried so much and i love the kind of unsettling feeling you write in your fics, it’s perfect in the category of yandere and dark content. in particular, i loved your drabble about shigaraki mourning over a dead reader and i’ve reread that one too many times to count haha! as for asks for headcannons and drabbles, it would be amazing to see that with bully!eren especially since he was such an awful person to the reader. i’d love to see him suffer honestly, but if you don’t want to write it, that’s completely fine! once again, i’m so proud of you for hitting 200! that’s such a huge milestone and hopefully, there will be many more in the future! :)

SYNOPSIS: bully!Eren has to navigate the world without you.

Pairing: Bully!Eren x Fem!Reader

A/N: I can't even explain in words how much I CHEESED at this message like my grin was ear to ear. can't explain how many times I read this. It singlehandedly made my day anon, and to repay you for my happiness....here is some angst. this is a slightly different route than the shiggy one but I hope it still suits you <3

TW: mentions of death, past dubcon/noncon, mentions of trauma, bullying, alcohol addiction, drunk driving, abusive behavior, revenge porn, nonconsensual photography/videography, mentions of infidelity, angst, so much of angst, violent behavior

WC: 2.5k

It's not like Eren had been doing a lot of soul-searching. He's not delusional enough to label his half-assed epiphany of "maybe I'm a shitty person" as soul searching.

It's just the conversation with his very sick mother burned holes through the back of his mind. Carla had asked about you and why you don't come by the house anymore. How she missed baking with you in the kitchen, and how you sweetly smiled whenever you would see soft creamy peaks form in the meringue.

Eren felt like he was swallowing needles as he assured his mother with false truths, that nothing was going on and distance between childhood friends is natural, and if it means so much--ok ok he'll bring you over.

He stays until he sees her chest slowly rising and falling into a gentle asleep. He touches the tip of his ears, unsurprised by how hot it was.

Eren, when you tell a lie, the tips of your ears turn red.

You're not at school the next day. Or the day after that. Or the day after that.

Guilt is not an emotion he feels often but the events of the past weekend replay in his mind. It was just a dumb party that Floch threw, and he was surprised to find you cornered by a trio of thee dunderheads. Like a distorted fairytale, he swept you away from the bad guys like a knight in shining armor, to only shove you in an empty room and demand compensation for playing hero.

Fuck, with that big mouth, you would think that you'd know how to suck cock.

Use your tongue stupid slut. If you use teeth, I'll shove this dick in your ass without any prep.

No, I don't care, you're taking all of it.

There's a video on his camera roll. How could he not record it? You're sobbing, mascara running down your cheeks, looking so beautiful and ruined with jizz smeared at the corner of your mouth. He was brutally fucking your mouth, making you take all of his length.

Breathe through your nose dumb whore. Or else you're gonna run out of air.

You were pleading with whatever garbled sounds you were constricted into producing.

Breathe through your fucking nose. This is for your sake. Otherwise, I don't mind face fucking your lifeless body. You'd be more useful that way anyways.

Eren is conflicted with muting the video because he can't stand to hear himself like that. But he didn't want to miss out on your pitiful whines.

He remembers the distraught expression on your face when he was finally done with you. He tucked himself inside, and sneered, "I've got a girl coming here. Get lost." You looked so fucking distraught. Why? All he did was make you suck his dick. He didn't even fuck you.

He should have. Eren thinks grimly when he stares at your empty desk on the first day you didn't show up to school. He's gotten off to the video more than enough times than he can count over the weekend, and he was aching to see your pretty face twisted into a terrorized expression when he flipped up your skirt to grope your ass.

Kindly, Eren decides he'd allow you to have a rest day. But the second day, Eren pays a visit to your house finding it dark and locked, like no one was home and hadn't been there for a while.

On the third day, you're declared missing.

Your incompetent workaholic mother who finally came home and decided to give a damn reported you missing to the authorities who had scratched their heads because as far as they knew, the pivotal 72 hours were up.

Paradis was surrounded by forests. No one wanted to say it, but they were all thinking it. If you got lost in there, chances are you wouldn't make it out.

Eren wasn't always this admired and fawned over. He had his fair share of behavioral issues that frightened people (not you though, not then at least, not when you were children, and you still came back every day to play).

But when he channeled that anger into sports, there was somewhat of a star in the making, especially for some small-town boy. He was becoming extremely popular, and that's nice and all, but at the end of the day, he has a mother whose health was taking a sharp decline. He was constantly under stress, stress that he took out on you.

Where did his favorite stress-ball go?

It's all fucking surreal. Having detectives in the school. Not that there were many students to question (because christ, did you even have any friends after Eren turned everyone against you?).

Eren was questioned. He can't help but mirthfully chuckle. Maybe this was your grand plan, maybe you were able to finally sort out a mountain of evidence against him. If you were going to fuck him over, didn't you want to see it happen with your own two eyes?

The dark-haired boy wishes that was true. If you had gotten your revenge, would you be here? No, revenge isn't the right word. If you got any justice for what he made you suffer, would you come back?

Hi, I'm Detective Hange. I would like to ask you some questions today. You're Eren Yeager, right?

Yes, that's me.

How do you know ___?

We were childhood friends. We're uh, we're not as close anymore.

When was the last time you saw her?

Friday night at Floch's party-

-Floch Forster right? There were a number of kids there from your school.

Yeah. It was a big party. She uh, doesn't usually come to parties but she was there that night.

You were the last person to be seen with her. Other kids have said that they saw you and her entering a room together, and then only her leaving the said room.

[Sigh] Yeah we sorta...hooked up.

I thought you said you guys weren't close anymore.

You can be not close to someone and still hook up with them.

But you guys were close once right?

Yeah. Once.

The dark-haired boy asks if he was under any suspicion. The detective waves their hand in a dismissive gesture, “If her diary tells us anything, it’s only that she really liked you.”

Were detectives even allowed to divulge that sort of information? Eren doesn’t know but the stray detail that they offered off-handedly made him feel like he was swallowing needles.

At that point, Eren honestly still doesn't believe you're gone. You had a habit of running away, even when you were little kids, but you always came back.

Still, he participates in the search parties with a renewed vigor, even going alone in the forest with a flashlight on most nights.

And he's just so fucking tired. The darkest crevice of his mind almost wishes you were dead because this ignorance was just agony. Almost. Because he still clings to the feeling that one day, he’ll stroll into class and find you in your seat in the back of the class, looking out the window like some cliche shojo manga protagonist.

There are folders and folders on his phone. Albums. The most recent one is dedicated to your crying face as you were choking on his dick. Earlier albums are composed of creepshots of your panties, of that obscene o-face, of your skirt flipped up and your ass cheeks, pictures of your cleavage, videos of you thrashing as he dunked your head into toilets like a villainous middle school bully.

Pictures of your neck covered in hickeys, your naked breasts, ass cheeks striped with red after getting spanked, your leaking cunt, just endless and endless media dedicated to pieces and pieces of your body like you were never a whole person.

The earliest ones though tell a different tale, from off-guards to your drooling face as you napped in the middle of the day.

He has a favorite picture. Your eyes are watery from the cold, snowflakes stuck between lashes, nose and cheeks flushed red, and you're smiling. Smiling right to the camera. Right at him.

"Eren, are you taking a picture?" You asked, bouncing in place, giddy that it was finally snowing.

"Not of you, shut up. Get out of the way." His voice is gruff but not harsh.

You laughed and jumped into frame anyway, and the bright streetlamp behind you made you seem like you were wearing a halo.

He wishes he had more pictures of you being...yourself. Because now your crying face displayed over countless pixels haunt him. But like a fucking degenerate, he still jerks off to all the nudes he coerced from you. Sometimes he cries when he's jerking off which is probably the most pathetic thing he's ever done. This is what you've reduced him to.

He hates the sound of his own voice.

Breathe through your fucking nose. This is for your sake. Otherwise, I don't mind face fucking your lifeless body. You'd be more useful that way anyways.

Eren goes through the motions of life without really feeling like he's in the moment. Seasons change and time flies. His mother dies, and his withdrawn father dies a year later. He proposes to Mikasa because it's something he was always supposed to do. She loves him unconditionally, so even when he doesn't put any effort into the relationship but proposes, she says yes hoping he'll change and be a good husband.

He doesn't go to his parents' funerals because they're already dead. What's the point. He doesn't visit the candlelight vigils in your honor either. After tearing his ACL again and a somewhat traumatic injury, he kisses his pro-football career goodbye. To be totally honest, he's relieved. Because he had gotten quite bored, and maybe he was looking for excuses to quit the entire time. It's not like you'd be cheering on the bleachers anyways.

Mikasa has an affair, more out of a desire to see her fiancé feel something for her as opposed to any burning lust. But when she asks him if he's ever cared at all, with tears springing out of her eyes, he's just calmly drinking his fifth of whisky.

The dark-haired man doesn't even look up, "Let's break up."

"Is this about her, huh? Fucking get over it already Eren. She's GONE. And you have some big fucking audacity moping about her death like you weren't making her cry in the bathroom stalls every fucking day you piece of shit."

"Get out."

"You know what, I bet she killed herse-"

SMASH

The dark-haired woman doesn't finish her rant because the whiskey bottle smashes on the wall next to her head, sending glass everywhere and staining the carpet amber. She's unharmed, knowing it wasn't Eren's intention to hit her but Jesus Christ, what a monster.

She packs her bags and leaves the town like she should have a long time ago. All her friends had left years before and she stayed behind because that's where Eren was. She thanks her lucky stars that they didn't marry.

It's funny because he had always imagined himself being the first to move out of their small town, but he's the one staying. He can't leave this place. feels too tethered to ever leave. Every diner and liquor store is saturated with memories of you. He remembers buying cigarettes and exhaling the smoke to your face to piss you off in empty parking lots.

Maybe he stays in case you'll come back.

Eren's days consist of alcohol-fueled hazes. He doesn't know how his liver is still functioning. He doesn't know he's still alive after crashing his car into a tree when he was drunk out of his mind. He was on his way to get some more vodka.

He barely recognizes himself in the mirror anymore, not that he looks at himself much. His hair is long, nestled around his shoulder because he couldn't be bothered to cut it, dark circles under viridian eyes, and a perpetual stubble on his jaw.

His parents had left quite a sizable inheritance so there's no need to work but he's good with his hands. Likes crafting up birdhouses and cabinets, and occasionally does odd jobs around the neighborhood, never charging the elderly.

He's under the sink, tinkering with a wrench against the pipes when he hears the old lady coo at him.

"We're so lucky to have you Eren. I'm surprised a handsome young man like yourself doesn't have a special lady. The girls must be lining up at your door!"

The dark-haired man winces, and offers no comment, knowing that that the older lady was susceptible to long tangents.

"You know, we're getting a new neighbor." Eren grunts as a response. "They're young, I've heard. Isn't that exciting? Oh my, Eren! I think they're gonna be living in the house right next to yours..."

He tunes out the rest of the conversation because doesn't really care. He just hopes his new neighbors are quiet.

It's Sunday noon when obnoxious noises of moving trucks and people wake him up from his deep slumber. Eren's annoyed to wake up despite the fact he's probably been sleeping over 15 hours. He oscillates between getting too much sleep and getting none, his sleeping habits completely dependent on his dreams.

His nightmares are too visceral, visions of your corpse asking him if he'd enjoyed hollowing your soul with his teeth.

His dreams are achingly sweet. You in your prom gown, shining so iridescently like diamonds were sewn into the silk. He's dancing with you, holding you close, and then after you guys go to your favorite diner and gorge on burgers and milkshakes.

There's a peal of distinctly feminine laughter that stirs up Eren's senses. He's so pathetic, was the mere sound of a woman laughing getting him excited?

He sighs. He thinks of the whore he's frequently visited because of her resemblance to you. Hair color, skin color, face shape--with enough alcohol, he could really convince the person beneath him, was you. Maybe it's time to give her a call, but she's gotten so fucking needy and he hated how her voice didn't match yours.

The green-eyed man peers from the lace curtains, irritated by the brats playing on his lawn. A full family next door? Great, just what he needs.

The friendly knock on his door breaks him out of his daze. He contemplates whether he should answer but on the second more muted knock, he lets his feet guide him.

He turns the knob.

And Eren Yeager completely shatters.

Because it's you isn't it? You're the person standing in front of him? He can hear what you're saying but he doesn't really register it, soaking in the cadence of a voice he had long forgotten because all he had were pleading whimpers and frenzied moans stored on his cell.

He's shaking. Is he dreaming? He's dreaming, right? He knows it's you. You're older, far more beautiful than he's ever seen you. You have a different hairstyle, wearing clothes he would have mocked you for, and there's this joyfulness within you that makes you glow.

There's a mess of emotions electrifying in the pits of his stomach from euphoria, anger, and dread. He could feel his skin growing clammy like he was about to vomit at any second.

"Hey, are you all right?"

Doe eyes full of concern peer up at him. He voices out the syllables of your name like a desperate prayer.

You tilt your head to the side, "How do you know my name?"

[zaceouiswriting]

The sweet and The jock

Character: Sweet Pea x male reader

Universe: Riverdale

Warnings: None

The hallways were filled with laughter. One guy in a letterman jacket running behind another one, holding a little book. Making fun of the guy behind him, telling him that he was slow, but at least he had a good throw. If not, he wouldn’t be on the team. But no one sounded it like he was making fun of him, but more to annoy him.

„Come on man, give me the book back!“, the slower guy cried after the faster one. But he just stopped, seeing his friend so far away from him, he opened the little book.

The moment, the slower one saw this, he panicked. Ran faster than before, to get to his friend before he could read it. But it was already too late. 

„Bro, for real?“, the one reading the book, asked the other one. He immediately comes to a halt. Looking at his friend in terror, but he just read the book more closely now. Not really acknowledging his friend anymore, „Bro this is sick! You need to show me how to do this!“

The faster friend, finally told him, closing the back and giving it back. „Are you for real right now?“, he asked in utter disbelieve. And the faster, slightly taller one, nodded excitedly with his head. „Yeah, I felt warm and fuzzy reading your poems. Especially the one with the warm summer. The love you had found there under the walnut tree. Amazingly written and so detailed without needing many words.“

He did not realize what he was talking about until his friend looked at him with an open mouth. „What’s going on bro?“, he asked to stay face, but the cat was out. The good thing was, nobody was around and his friend and he, both now knew a secret of the other so that no one would ever find out.

As they turned away, a looming shadow vanished in the darkness of a classroom, which neither of them had seen. Not aware, that somebody had heard them, they went on their merry way, joking and laughing together just a moment later, as if nothing ever happened.

The two friends, became closer, the smaller slower one, and learned a lot about each other. Man things nobody knew about him. He was distraught as he learned that he was a natural in everything he does. He learned violin in a matter of months, at the same time as piano. Not once did his grades dropped beyond the best and he was an excellent athlete.

For things he needed years to learn, his friend was able to grasp in a short amount of time. „How do you hide it this good?“, he asked him at some point.

His friend smiled at him. „I’m also a natural in acting. But I must say, I love the jock life. Nobody really thinks that I can do anything and for this, they never expect something from me, besides being dumb, making rude comments, and being a prick all the time,“ he laughed as he told him the advantages of being like them.

Again neither of them saw the shadow looming around a corner. Only this time, taking a video of the two, as they talked, clearly audible what they were saying.

It didn't take long, for this person to make their move. As you the next morning came into the school. Opened your locker something almost fell out of it. A tape recorder, with a note attached: „If you don’t want me to leak the video, this audio tape is from bring…“ Before you were even finished reading, you already stormed off.

Your locker still open, you stomped in the direction of a classroom, that for a few weeks now is occupied by a new club. Almost ripping the stupid door out, as you barged into it, you immediately looked at the guy with the beanie.

„Jughead, what the hell is this bullshit?“, you cursed at him, as you threw the recorder and the note into his lap.

He was perplexed to see you there but did not say anything until he looked down at his lap. „Someone is blackmailing you, I guess?“, he told you nonchalantly. But it only made you more furious.

„I don’t get blackmailed. I get blackmailed by one of your members! Do you see the way it is written? I have never seen this type of writing before, your guys came here. Not only that, in the rest of the message are so many errors, that I needed to stop before a fucking blood vessel would explode in my brain!“

Jughead looked at you funnily, as if he tried to understand what was happening. „Either, you find you did this, or I promise you, I will make all your lives a living fucking nightmare! I will loosen my grip on the team I have and will let them run a rampage.“

With that, you stormed off again. Slamming the door so hard, that a part of it broke. Not realizing, that someone else now has you in his line of view. Looking at you closely from afar, not letting anything get by.

From this day on you, put space between your close friend and yourself, just to make sure, that nobody would find out. You did not want to be seen as anything other than a dumb jock, even though your teachers knew better. But they also knew better, than tell anyone.

Nothing seemed different in the days coming, at least not for you. That was until while practicing, one of the serpents walked onto the field, just after you had thrown the ball. „Look out!“, you screamed at the guy, just before the ball hit him in the head. You ran to him as fast as possible, while he was already surrounded by the rest of your team and your coach.

It took, the guy a while until he could sit up, without falling again. The coach ushered everyone except you away, so you could bring him into the nurse's office. But the guy was taller, more muscular, and heavier than you. But despite the difficulty, you brought him into the school.

A good while before the nurse's office, the guy out of a sudden, walked normally, pulled you into an empty classroom, and closed the door behind him.

„What the fuck?“, you breathlessly exclaimed, as he was looking you up and down. „I followed you the last couple of days and-“ Before he could finish his sentence, you already had your fist clenched ready to punch him, but he was faster than you, which you never had before. He pushed you back until you landed safely on a chair, bewildered you looked at him

„Jughead found the guy. You were right, he was one of us. How you did it, with only his writing is impressive. Here is the recording. Don’t worry, he will never do something like this again.“ 

Relive washed over you, as you finally had in your hands, what you knew could destroy your image. Before you could thank the guy, he looked down onto the floor. „I watched the footage,“ he told you sheepishly. Even scratching the back of his head. „I heard you telling your friend, about your ex-boyfriend. Must say, did not believe it even after hearing it, but after following you for a couple of days, I accept it. And wanted to ask you, if you maybe want to go to Pops with me?“

You were flabbergasted as this guy, first told you, that he invaded your privacy, followed you like a creep, and now wanted to go out with you? On the other side, he was extremely handsome. His black hair and dark mysterious eyes, let you feel a lot. And he was a gang member. So life most likely would never get boring. Still, you acted like you needed more convincing. As he just stood there, saying nothing you made your way out, without giving him an answer.

You were able to see his puppy dog eyes before you left the room. „Seven in the evening, wear your serpent leather jacket. I will be waiting in a corner booth.“ Not waiting on any response, you immediately left the room, taking the memory out of the camera and stomping on it. Only after seeing it in little pieces did you pick it up and threw it away. Just for you to run out, throwing the camera somewhere and getting back to practice.

But your mind was full with this guy and the audacity he had, talking to you like that, after everything he did. You liked him, maybe even a bit too much already. Maybe you could even train with him. The right statue was already there, he only needed some coordination training. Still better than your ex-Conner, whose religion was more important than your love.

[Masterlist]

[nationalharryleague]

Two for the Show

Summary: Jeff plans for Harry’s new opening act to be more than that. 

Genre: Famous Fake Dating! 

Word Count: 17.1k!

Pinterest Board

A/N: Hey babes!! This is something I’ve been working on since December now and I’m so fucking proud of it and how it turned out!!! It’s the longest thing I’ve ever written and I’m so so so excited to hear what everyone has to say!! Giant thank you’s go out to the incredible soph (@theharriediaries​) and Lu (@meetmymouth​) bc this never would have come to fruition without them and their help!! Please let me know what you think!! More of my writing can be found in my masterlist!! Happy reading y’all :)

***

Keeping appearances in the public eye is a delicate balance.

If Y/N was being honest with herself, everything Full Stop Management had ever suggested to her had worked, and very well. When they suggested her music took a more pop direction, they set her up with a team of fantastic producers and her music sales and popularity skyrocketed. And when they set up an appointment with a celebrity stylist to figure out her signature style, it worked; they turned her into the 1970’s inspired goddess she had always dreamed of being. Even the hours of media training that she had been put through worked, helping her learn how to bob and weave even the most intrusive of interview questions.

But this time, she thought they might be going too far.

“Jeff,” she began with a sigh and a doubtful shake of her head, “I don’t know about this one.”

“It’s just a few months before and during the tour,” explained the man sitting across from her at the long conference table. “You’ll be seen in public a few times to drum up publicity for the tour and your album, maybe do an interview or two together, and some light PDA.”

His expression was honest and earnest. In the time he had represented her, he had never done anything to her that didn’t help her succeed. It was not hard for her to believe that he just wanted what was best for her and her career.

But something kept holding her back.

“I just got my heart broken in the most public way,” she said softly, absentmindedly fiddling with the base of her ring finger where an engagement ring once sat. “Isn’t it a little too soon to be seen jumping back into a whirlwind romance?”

“I don’t think so. If anything, it will make James look even worse than he already does after what he did to you.” She had to admit the idea of a little revenge did perk her ears up a bit. “And it doesn’t hurt that Harry is so universally loved and known for being such a good guy.”

That was another reason she was skeptical of this entire plot. This was Harry Styles they were talking about; Harry fucking Styles. She had only met him once or twice while working out details for her to be the opening act for his upcoming tour, but she had been a big fan of his and idolized him since she was a teen. Just meeting him threw her inner 16 year old self for a loop, let alone trying to pretend she was in love with him.

In all honesty, it probably wouldn’t be too hard on her end once she got over being starstruck; she wasn’t so sure she still wasn’t kind of in love with him, or at least the version the public saw.

“Listen,” Jeff began again, his voice taking on a bluntness, “no one cares about the opening act. No one bought tickets to see you; they’re there to see Harry.” His words stung but she knew it was the truth. “But if they think you are a part of Harry’s life, they care about you too. And they will keep on caring about you after they leave the show.” Her apprehensiveness must have been clear on her face when he put on a gentle smile. “He’s a really nice person. I promise.”

“I know,” she breathed, a small pout finding its way to her lips. “Fine,” she conceded after a moment, throwing her hands up in the air dramatically to signal surrender. “I’m in.”

A triumphant grin spread across his face. “Thank you. I’ll go call Harry and tell him you’re down.” She watched as he got up from his chair and came towards her, pressing a brief and friendly kiss to the top of her head. “You won’t regret this, Y/N.”

“I better not, Azoff,” she chuckled while shaking her head slightly.

Soon she was alone in the conference room, basking in the light from the floor to ceiling windows that sat before her.

“What did I just get myself into?” she mumbled quietly to herself.

***

The answer to that question came two weeks later when she was sitting across a table from the Harry Styles at a small outdoor brunch spot in LA. Their meeting place was strategic, a small restaurant, not too flashy so it didn’t look like they were seeking attention, but outdoors where anyone could see. It was only a matter of time before he was recognized, and the sighting was almost guaranteed to be trending on Twitter only minutes later.

She couldn’t say that she wasn’t nervous. The inside of her mouth had been chewed raw and the bags under her eyes showed she had been having trouble sleeping in the nights leading up to their first appearance together. By the end of the day, she would most likely have countless articles written about her and possibly have millions of angry fangirls coming after her; even though their “relationship” wouldn’t be officially confirmed for a few weeks.

If all went to Jeff’s plan, she would become an A-lister overnight.

She stood in front of her closet for over an hour, trying on and taking off outfits before finally settling on her favorite pair of bright red corduroy flares and a crisp white textured halter top. She paired the outfit with a new pair of heeled leather boots. They were a flashy pair that were split down the middle, bright yellow on one side and white with yellow stars on the other, hoping Harry would appreciate the bold colors.

She meticulously did her makeup, sure to match her lipstick color exactly to the shade of her pants; and spent far too long in front of the mirror fussing with her hair, praying it would lay the way she wanted it to.

She knew that she was going to be photographed in some way shape or form, and with the fashion icon himself. She had to look good. He had been on the cover of Vogue for god’s sake.

When she finally arrived at the cafe, Harry sat quietly across from her. He looked casual, or as casual as Harry Styles gets. A yellow t-shirt, that was tight enough to look as if it was painted on, showed off his muscular chest and arms. His iconic tattoos illustrated his arms and she hoped he wouldn’t notice as she covertly tried to examine closely. He uncomfortably ran his palms down the legs of his high waisted denim flares that had been paired with his signature pearl necklace and ratty, but well loved, white vans.

And she couldn’t forget his rings. His signature gold ‘H’ and ‘S’ looked back at her as he gently grasped his flute filled to the brim with a mimosa, bringing it to his pink lips that were surrounded by the short stubble he had been wearing lately.

The pair sat in a slightly awkward silence, both seeming to down their mimosas quickly just because it was something to do with their hands and could occupy their lips so they didn’t have to talk.

To say she was panicking, wouldn’t be too much of an over exaggeration. She was sitting across from one of the world’s biggest stars, and as one of his biggest closeted fans. The things he could do for her career were astronomical and it was hard to ignore that, but she also had a hard time getting over the way his hair seemed to fall into perfect tousled curls and his dreamy green eyes.

She had been in love with him (or at least the idea of him) since she was 16. She couldn’t help it.

But the bottomless mimosas helped to break her anxiety, and apparently his as well, as they both began to feel a slight buzz.

“So how did Jeff end up talking you into this?” Harry eventually broke the silence, the alcohol lowering his naturally shy inhibitions just enough to kick off their conversation.

She let a playful eye roll take over her face before she began. “Oh Jeff,” she said jokingly, letting out a long sigh. “I was convinced somewhere in between ‘it’ll make your ex look bad’ and a stern ‘no one ever cares about the opening act,’” she chuckled, while sarcastically wagging her finger in the air, dramatically re-enacting his scolds.

He sucked in a breath through his teeth, letting out a dramatic ‘ouch.’ “He’s not always gentle, is he?” matching her chuckle.

“He knows where to hit you where it hurts,” she laughed, while nodding in agreement. “How did he convince you?”

“Coincidently, he also took a low blow involving my ex. I believe his words were ‘You wrote an entire album about her and haven’t dated anyone since and it makes you look kind of pathetic.’” He dramatically used air quotes and did his best impression of Jeff’s American accent. She couldn’t hold back the giggles that erupted from her.

“Oh my goodness,” she let out through slightly buzzed giggles, “you definitely win.”

From that point, their conversation began to flow more easily, easing her anxiety as she learned he was generally easy to talk to. He laughed at her jokes, and she laughed at his. He really did have the calming and disarming quality that people always said he had, like could melt down any walls and convince you to be honest with him, even if you didn’t really want to be. She was shocked to find that she wanted him to genuinely be a friend to her so badly. He was just so nice and such a good listener.

Their conversation took a turn when Harry’s super power of knowing when his picture was being taken kicked in. “Give me your hand,” he said to her, diverting from the pleasant conversation they had been having about their families. “Don’t look but there’s someone across the street taking photos of us.”

His instructions brought her back to the reality that they weren’t really friends and that all of this was for show.

She brought her hand up to meet his, strategically resting on the side of the table that faced the street, giving the camera the best view. The cool metal of his hand full of rings felt good against her skin that had been baking in the hot LA sun and he passed his thumb over her knuckles with faux affection.

She couldn’t help but feel a dishonest weight pulling on her heart. She knew everything was going to plan and this was all for the best, but it also felt slightly wrong. She played with her small heart shaped earring to distract herself from the sinking feeling.

“Harry,” she began, knowing the people across the street were out of ear shot. Her voice brought his attention from her hand back up to her eyes. “Does this feel wrong to you at all?”

“How so?”

“It just feels dishonest, like we’re lying to millions of people, our–well, mostly your fans.” She couldn’t help but correct herself.

His eyes softened at her words, like he was taking in the innocence she still held onto after only being in the industry for a short time, compared to his decade in the spotlight.

“I try not to think of it as lying,” he spoke slowly after a moment of thinking. He nodded along softly to punctuate his words. “When you think about all this as lying, it starts to weigh pretty heavy on you as a person. I try to be as honest as possible in my music and daily life, but that’s not always what people want to see. They want a show that will entertain them, and it is our job to give it to them.”

“I see,” she mused.

They sat together for another hour or so, allowing their small mimosa buzz to wear off enough for them to drive the short distances to their homes. The pair eventually found their way back to a comfortable conversation, but Harry’s comment about being in the public eye still weighed on her.

Suddenly, she wasn’t sure if all of this was worth it. Y/N was a master at dodging a question and turning the charm to 10 when it was needed, but she wasn’t a liar and she definitely wasn’t an actress. She hoped she (or Jeff) hadn’t bitten off more than she could chew with all of this.

Harry eventually walked her back to her car that was parked a few blocks away, and while she was sure he was doing it for the cameras, she didn’t doubt that he would have done it even if they weren’t there. He just seemed like that kind of guy to her; caring and trustworthy.

“Thank you for a very nice date, Harry,” she said, winking and chuckling along with the extra emphasis she put on the last word.

“My pleasure,” he smiled down at her. He moved along with her as she walked to the driver's side door, opening it for her like a perfect gentleman. The two stood close, his body hovering over her’s as they stood inside the open door. Her heart rose to her throat as he leaned down to her and pressed a gentle kiss to her burning cheek.

Y/N  looked back up at him with rosy cheeks and a tightlipped bashful smile. She watched as he walked backward carefully, taking her hand that had been locked with his until he was too far and let it fall back to her body.

She situated herself in her drivers seat and was ready to leave when she heard a knocking on the passenger side window that startled her. Harry had bent himself over and was motioning for her to roll the window down. When she did, he leaned himself in, an honest look in his eyes.

“Before you go,” he said gently. “A word of advice from someone who had been in the public eye for a long time,” he spoke with a tender yet serious tone, eyes locking with hers. “When you go home today, don’t go on social media. People are mean, and it’s just going to hurt.” She nodded along with his words and watched as he pinched his bottom lip. “And when you inevitably can’t resist, text me if you need to talk about it.”

***

They must have done a good job putting on their show because within an hour of her returning home to her apartment, they were all anyone was talking about. Their names were trending worldwide #1 on Twitter. Streams of Y/N’s debut album were up by 800%, and even Harry’s streams had taken a considerable jump. Y/N had gained 40,ooo new followers and views on every interview she had ever done were steadily rising.

All was going according to Jeff’s plan.

Harry’s words circled her brain for hours. “Don’t go on social media,” she heard him say over and over again as she paced her apartment, only stopping to look at the phone sitting on the kitchen counter every so often.

She had taken a shower, done her hair, tried to watch TV, cooked herself dinner, and even tried to sit down and write a song; it all got her nowhere fast. The unknown was eating at her inside.

Y/N broke when she heard the small ding signaling she had gotten a text message. She had all but sprinted to see who it was, reunited with the outside world through her touch screen. Unsurprisingly, it was from Jeff; the message sent to her and an unknown number she assumed to be Harry’s.

Good job, kiddos., was all it read but there was a photo attached to the message. Her heart stopped while she waited for the photo to load, cursing her slow wifi in the process. After a few breathless moments, the photo came through.

It was a screenshot from the website of one of the biggest entertainment magazines in the country. A picture of him kissing her cheek was the front page of the website.

Harry Styles and Y/N Y/L/N Rumored To Be Music’s New Power Couple Ahead of Tour

She was honestly speechless. This was huge.

She would like to say the sheer shock blurred her judgement, but the curiosity just got the better of her. Harry’s words repeated over and over again in her head, telling her not to, even as her finger connected with the icon of the little blue bird.

She was the most talked about topic in the entire world, her name hovering in bold letters on the trending page. She did everything she could to not click on her name, but her fingers did it all on her own.

The first few tweets were nice. Someone said they liked her style and that they looked cute together as a couple. Another said that they had always enjoyed her music and that they were happy for them.

But as she scrolled, it became harsher and just mean. People commented on her weight, said she couldn’t sing, and criticized her personality as seeming fake and forced. Her eyes were locked on the screen, unable to look away, as her heart began to break and few tears began to roll.

It took one final, and the most painful, tweet for her to consider deleting her account completely. She swiped out of the app fast, but the words were still burned into her brain.

Y/N is using Harry, just like she used James before he got rid of her and found someone better.

The words knocked the wind out of her, pouring salt on an open wound that had yet to heal.

She also had the little blue bird for that heartbreak as well. When she opened the app two months ago, the first thing she saw was pictures of her (former) fiance, James, with his tongue down some girl’s throat. At the time she had been devastated, her heart broken beyond repair.

It felt like no one else in the world could understand the way she was feeling. If she was in this position because of another person, they must get it too. The text to Harry was already sent before she had time to think it over.

I looked and I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry that I didn’t listen.

His response came only seconds later.

Don’t be sorry. It’s hard not to. Are you alright?

She had to think about his question, unsure if she knew the answer. Tears were still running down her face and she felt like she was a target the entire world had decided it was open season on. Logically, she knew these people never thought she would see these awful things, but it didn’t excuse the hurt she felt when she did.

I don’t know. I just don’t understand how people can be so cruel.

She felt like she was bothering him, even though he had offered to be there for her. He wasn’t her best friend, or a close confidant; he was her fake publicity boyfriend. He had real friends he wanted to talk to or maybe even a real girlfriend underwraps somewhere. Her body was wracked with guilt as she thought it over.

People are just mean on the internet, okay? They think they can say whatever they want without repercussions. I’m so sorry that you are being targeted because of me.

Before she got a chance to think through a proper response to him, her phone dinged with another text. It was from Jeff again.

Really good job, kiddos.

Y/N was confused. They hadn’t done anything else but be seen together today. Her sick sense of curiosity got her again before she opened Twitter again and looked up Harry’s name. He had tweeted for the first time in six months only a few moments ago.

@Harry_Styles: We treat people with kindness.

***

The next time she saw him was two days later at yet another public meet up Jeff had arranged for them. Unfortunately this time, she had become just as famous as Harry seemingly overnight, the flames of her new found fame growing even larger after he had sent that tweet.

While the fame had grown, the hate had calmed since his statement, which most had taken as an official declaration of their relationship. Now, that was not to Jeff’s plans.

She had to fight her way out of her apartment complex, wearing a pair of massive dark sunglasses with circular lenses and shielding her face with her hands the best she could. But she did have to admit that the electric orange fabric of her jumpsuit probably didn’t do much to help her blend in and avoid the attention of the paparazzi that had now found out where she lived.

Harry was sitting at the table by himself facing the back of the cafe when she arrived, two cups of coffee waiting before him to be drank together placed delicately on the table. He had his head down, buried in a book, before she startled him with a hug from behind. Her cheek connected with his warm neck where she buried her head into him and she took in his dizzying cologne.

She felt him jump beneath her as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pressing a dramatic and cheesy kiss to his cheek, feeling his light stubble prick her chapsticked lips. “My hero,” she joked, trying to bring at least a little humor to the man who had just about jumped out of his skin at her touch.

It felt like she was crossing a boundary, and she was pretty sure she was, but she just needed to thank him and a hug felt like the best way to do that while in a semi-crowded coffee shop. Also, playing up that they were madly in love didn’t hurt.

“Jesus Christ,” he breathed, a hand flying over his chest in surprise to feel his racing heartbeat. “You scared the shit out of me.” Once he settled for a moment, his arm moved across his chest to rest on her arm. His touch was gentle and soft, holding her there gently like he didn’t want her to release him from her grasp. She tried not to think about it too much as she slipped her arms off of him, making her way to the seat that was clearly meant for her across from him.

“I’m sorry that I scared you. A little jumpy today?” she teasingly questioned.

“Hey, watch it,” he playfully threatened. “I believe you called me your hero about thirty seconds ago.”

“I guess I did,” she quipped over the mug she was bringing to her lips. It was sweet but not too sweet, with cream but not too much, and still piping hot; just the way she liked it. “I don’t think it’s too far off,” she smiled before turning back to the coffee. “Good coffee,” she mused. “Just the way I like it.”

“Good. I texted Jeff for your order,” he informed her, the gesture being so thoughtful and sweet she could have melted into a puddle right there and then. “And I think ‘hero’ might be a bit much,” he tacked on.

“Don’t be humble, Harry.” While her voice was still light and held a jesting tone, she meant her words. “You made the entire internet leave me alone, for the most part,” she clarified as there were definitely some nasty messages still floating around Twitter, “in five words.”

“It was the least I could do,” he said while shaking his head slightly, seeming to deflect her words.

“You could have done absolutely nothing.” She reached across the table and grabbed his hand in hers like they had staged at the cafe a few days earlier; but this time, it was an honest gesture, not one for a role they were both meant to be playing. Her words were serious, punctuating each with a gentle nod of her head. “I mean it. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” His eyes held the same truthfulness and honesty she hoped she was mirroring in her own. “I know all of this,” he paused and gestured between them with his free hand, “is for publicity, but I consider you a friend. It was hard to watch it all go down like that. You’re a good person and you didn’t deserve all that. I had to do something.”

There was a warmth that flooded her chest. He called me his friend, she thought to herself, fighting back a big toothy grin. She had been under the impression that all of this was just work for him, something he was doing just to drum up publicity, with no personal connections at all. But him calling her a friend meant so much to her. It meant she was not alone in all this terrifying and overwhelming attention.

“I’m glad you think of me as a friend,” she said, still holding back her smile. “You’re my friend too.” He matched her close-lipped smile that had fought its way onto her face at her words.

They sat in silence together for a few moments. Harry returned to his book and Y/N answered emails; but their hands stayed connected across the small table. This silence was very different from the silence on the day they first met. It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence that sat on your tongue, begging you to break the quiet; it was peaceful and safe.

Their silence was broken when a young woman wearing a jittery smile and nervous eyes approached their table. Her voice squeaked out a mouse-like “Hi,” towards the both of them, bringing their eyes up to meet hers and instinctively breaking their hands away from each other.

“I’m so so sorry to be a bother,” she began, cheeks red and hot. “But I’m a really big fan of both of you and I would never forgive myself if I didn’t say hello.” She rambled excitedly, mostly looking at Harry, as she held her slightly shaky hands up to her chest.

“Hello,” Harry said with one of his million dollar smiles. “What’s your name?”

“I’m Emma,” she breathed.

“Well, it’s so nice to meet you Emma.” He spoke gently with her, clearly sensing her anxiety, extending his hand for her to shake. “Thank you for all of your support.”

Y/N watched closely as he spoke with her. He spoke to her like she was the only person in the room, giving her his whole undivided attention, and repeatedly thanking her as she flooded him with compliments about how his music and message of kindness meant so much to her. She was so entranced that she nearly didn’t hear her own name being said as the girl turned towards her.

“I love your music as well,” she grinned, clearly more comfortable after her short conversation with Harry. “And your jumpsuit is just incredible.” Her nervous giggle was contagious, Y/N releasing one as well at the compliment as her cheeks heated slightly. She was shocked she even knew any of her music, clearly being the less popular of the pair.  

“Thank you so much, Emma. It means a lot.”

Emma took a few quick selfies with the both of them (that would be everywhere within a few hours), said goodbye and went to leave the two, but not before she paid them one last compliment. “You two are really cute together. I’m rooting for you.”

Both of their cheeks warmed as they looked back at each other. They were quiet for a moment, unsure how to respond, before Harry turned his attention back to the girl with a coy smile. “I am too,” was all he said.

***

The next three weeks passed in a blur of tour rehearsals, fittings, and public meetings with Harry. And then all of a sudden, it was the night of the first show.

Y/N had never been so nervous in her entire life. She would be the first face seen by just over 19,000 people, tasked to warm up the crowd and prepare them for Harry, which was enough pressure. And then there was the chance that they all hated her guts.

She stood behind the curtain, listening to the loud and inpatient crowd as she paced back and forth. She white-knuckeld her guitar, trying to keep her violently shaking hands from being too visible to the crew around her. Her stomach swirled and her palms were clammy, constantly having to rub them on the pants of her icey blue jumpsuit. It fit her like a glove, the wide legged pants and slight shoulder pads, creating a perfect hourglass silhouette; the only thing she was confident in at the moment was how good she looked in it.

Her heart leapt out of her chest and she almost hit the ceiling when a small voice appeared over her shoulder, whispering “You’re going to do great,” in her ear. If her heart wasn’t about to give out before, it was now. She swung around to face him, almost hitting Harry with her guitar, letting out a small breath of relief when her eyes met his own. They always seemed to calm her down a bit.

“I’m kinda freaking out, H,” she anxiously babbled, using the nickname he had told her to call him. “This is the biggest crowd I’ve ever played in front of, and they probably all hate me because they think I’m dating you, and I have to make sure I do a good job so they start listening to my music; and I just…” she trailed off for a second, uncomfortably scratching the back of her neck, “I just can’t let you down.”

His face softened at her words, seeming to take pity on her. “Y/N,” he began, resting his hands on her shoulders and looking so deep into her eyes she felt like he could probably see her soul. “We picked you to open because people love your music and the way that you perform. You just have to go out there and do what you do best: sing your heart out and put on a good show. It’s only 25 minutes. I know you can do it.”

Every word that left his lips was laced with honesty and encouragement; just enough for Y/N to relax her furrowed brow and give her lip a break from her constant chewing. “I can do it,” she softly repeated back to him, still not breaking contact with his striking green eyes.

A stage manager passed by them, running to some other important task, but not before tapping her shoulder. “You’re on in 30 seconds,” he spoke, just as she heard the roar of the crowd begin, signalling the dimming of the lights in the arena.

“Go kick some ass,” he winked, stepping backwards from her and releasing her from his grasp. “I’ll be watching.”

Walking on stage, she wasn’t met with ‘boo’s that had plagued her nightmares, or mean looks from the audience, or rotten tomatoes thrown from the crowd.

They were screaming in excitement, screaming for her.

From the second she started playing, the crowd had her back; the ones that knew the words to her songs sang them along with her, and the ones that didn’t, happily danced to her voice. Before long, the smile she had forced onto her face was genuine, and her set passed by with ease. When her 25 minutes were up, she wasn’t sure if she wanted to get off the stage.

She took her final bow as the crowd roared, running off of the stage into the wings, looking for one person in particular. And when she found him, she threw herself into Harry’s open and waiting arms. “I told you that you were going to do great!” He spoke excitedly into her ear and he held her close to his body, his arms wrapped around her waist tight.

She liked the way it felt to be in his arms.

Pulling away from him, she saw the massive grin that he wore for her, noting how adorable his dimples were and how the excited look in his eyes made him look like a little kid. But there was more to his face than excitement, he looked proud.

“They were so nice to me, and they knew my songs, and they were screaming so loud for me, and it just went so well. I can’t believe it!” Her previous anxious chatter had become an exhilarated rambling and she felt on top of the world.

“I can,” he grinned, looking down at his watch quickly. “I have to go get changed.” If she wasn’t so amped up, she might have noticed the disappointment that flashed over his features. “Promise me you’ll watch the show?”

“Pinky swear?” She stuck up her little finger in the air.

“Pinky swear.” He kept their pinkies locked for a moment too long, then released her hand and ran backstage to get dressed.

She kept her promise and watched with excitement as the building shook when Harry took the stage.

She had never heard something quite so loud, sure her ears would be ringing when she snuggled into her bunk on the tour bus that night. Watching him perform was mesmerizing; he knew how to work a stage in every way and make every person in the arena feel like he was singing just for them. He was larger than life while performing and his little dances and mannerisms only got more pronounced the more comfortable he got on stage. He messed with Mitch, who she had only met a few hours ago (he was very nice), and constantly praised Sarah on the drums behind him, while he looked over to Adam and sent him smiles often.

Everyone in the building came for a show, and boy, did he give them one. It was amazing to watch. There was a reason she was a fan.

Bouncing off the stage, full of adrenaline and in a post-show high, he came to find her. It wasn’t hard, as she had never left her spot on the side of the stage, unable to rip her eyes away from the man before her.

“Oh my god, Harry! That was incredible!” she said with delighted amazement.

“I’m glad you liked it.” He was smiling down at her with a big toothy grin, a hand running through his sweaty hair and pushing it off his forehead. “They only get better from here.”

***

He was telling the truth. The shows only got crazier and more exciting as the tour went on, and so did their “relationship.”

About five shows in, Jeff had Harry given her his “H” ring to start wearing. Harry didn’t seem too phased by it all even though she thought it might be too much, saying “it’s like a friendship bracelet.” But it was too big for her fingers, not because she had small hands, but because Harry’s were absolutely massive. She wore it on a chain around her neck from then on and made sure to always be seen playing with it.

Fans took notice and loved it.

A little after that, Jeff sent them off to get matching manicures. Both had a melting rainbow of oranges, pinks, and browns on their fingertips, which looked amazing in the paparazzi photos of them walking around with their fingers intertwined.

The fans loved that too.

But when she “accidentally” posted a photo of Harry on her story, the entire world lost it’s shit. In the photo, he laid sprawled across a bed in only a white hotel robe that was creeping dangerously high up his thigh. He looked sleepy and slightly sweaty, in a post-fuck haze, and clothes that looked very similar to ones she had been seen wearing in public only days before were strewn across the floor. The caption read “I love getting to love you.”

The photo had strategically only been up for about 30 seconds, but by the time it was deleted thousands of people had seen it and screenshots had been taken. They quickly circulated the internet, creating a bit of scandal. But more than anything, people began to love the two of them together even more. Harry looked genuinely happy in the photo, and for most of his fans, that was all that mattered.  

They were creating a fairytale love story for an audience, but she would be lying if she said she wasn’t enjoying her role. She quite liked being his “girlfriend.”

Harry and Y/N had a way of clicking as they grew closer–quite literally as they were crammed together on a tour bus most of the time. They seemed to be able to finish each other’s sentences and always beat the other to the punchline of a joke. The pair had begun to pick up on the other’s mannerisms and habits; Y/N always teasing that Harry was going to rub his nose off one day if he kept rubbing it while he was thinking and Harry always knowing when she got enough sleep by whether or not she had put on eyeliner that morning. They swapped playlists back and forth in their bunks as they tried to doze off and always grabbed a cup of coffee for whoever had decided to sleep in the next day, now knowing the other’s order by heart.

There was only one thing she didn’t know about him that she longed to discover: what his lips felt like against her own. She could never think too hard about it though, or she may just explode.

He had become a calming presence and was currently helping her keep her cool, even though she knew the pair of interviewers across the table were getting ready to grill the pair for every detail they could get. His hand had settled on top of her knee to quell it’s nervous bouncing, but remained after she had stopped, even though no one could see his touch under the table. She watched as his thumb ran itself back and forth along the leg of her flashy orange and yellow patterned overalls and she had a hard time pulling her gaze away when the radio host across the large table began to speak.

“So Harry,” the bald man began. “Fine Line has been one of the biggest albums of the year and I just have to say I love it. It’s truly incredible.” She listened as the man continued on to sing Harry’s praises, going on to list his grammy nominations, sold out world tour, and other accolades. She couldn’t help but smile as she watched his cheeks tinge pink with the praise. She knew anyone watching would pick up on her adoring look and people fawn over it, but she knew her gaze was nothing but truthful.

“Thank you very much,” he said shyly, shaking his head slightly as he spoke into the microphone suspended in front of his face. “You’re too kind.”

“Stop being humble,” she teased him, playfully tapping him on the arm. “All of his music is fantastic,” she said turning her attention back to the man across from them, “especially Fine Line.”

“And there’s Y/N, being the supportive girlfriend,” the man chuckled.

“I support him in everything he does,” she smiled back, not having to embellish the truth at all. “He is an amazing talent and I think Fine Line shows that.”

It wasn’t hard for her to gush about him. It was actually quite easy. She absolutely adored him, as an artist, a friend, and the focus of her affection. She felt an equal warmth in her cheeks as she watched his get even pinker with her compliments.

“That’s actually something we wanted to ask you about,” the blonde woman sitting next to him piped up, a mischievous glint in her eyes that sent nervous butterflies flying around Y/N’s stomach. “One of the songs on Fine Line, Cherry to be specific, actually features the voice of Harry’s ex, Camille. How does that make you feel as his new girl?”

Y/N did her best not to gag at the woman’s question, gritting her teeth as she plastered on a polite smile. “Well, I think Cherry is a really great song and her voice at the end adds a lot,” she spoke as smoothly as she could, refusing to let on that the question rattled her. Harry’s light squeeze on her knee signalled to her that she had answered the question well.

“It’s also been three years since the song was written,” Harry cut in. “Things are obviously a lot different now.” He connected their eyes for a second while he was leaning back into his seat, sending her a short smile, but she knew him well enough to know it was genuine.

“Oh, definitely,” the woman eagerly agreed. “You’re in a great new relationship with a beautiful girl on your arm.”

“Y/N,” he emphasized her name as the woman had referred to her as a possession of his for a second time, “and I are very happy. Thank you.” To an onlooker, he was calm. To her, he was visibly uncomfortable by her words.

Y/N began to notice a clear pattern as the interview went on. Harry was asked exclusively about his music and the tour, while Y/N only became relevant to their interviewers when they wanted to mention their relationship.

When the man asked Y/N if she felt uncomfortable playing to Harry’s mainly female fanbase every night that are “so obviously jealous of her,” something snapped inside of her, sending all her hours of media training out the window. “I’m not uncomfortable at all,” she said curtly. “His music is great and he puts on an awesome show. I don’t think the audience’s gender really has anything to do with the music.” She watched the man’s face fall before she decided to go on. “And I would like to think that at least a few of them are there for me too. You do know I make music too, right?”

An indignant smirk found its way to her lips as the man stammered out, “yes, of course.”

“Okay. I was just wondering since you have only asked me questions about our relationship since we got here.”

She knew Jeff wouldn’t be happy, but at the moment, she couldn’t care less. They may not have really been dating, but the interviewers didn’t know that. All of their dismissal of her and her career was 100% real.

She had been so worked up that she didn’t even realize Harry’s hand had left her knee until it found its way to rest on her back. She leaned into his touch as he rubbed her back softly while she crossed her arms in front of her.

The interviewers looked at the two of them across the table, jaws both lying on the floor. It was quiet until Harry nonchalantly spoke. “She has a point.”

The last few minutes of the interview passed in an awkward blur that felt suffocating. She felt like she could finally take in a deep breath once they were in the back of a massive SUV being driven away from the studio.

“Jeff is going to have my head,” she mumbled under her breath, nose stuck into her phone as she scrolled Twitter to see what people were saying about her outburst. But before she could read any opinions, Harry's tattooed arm blocked her view as he gently pushed her phone down onto her lap.

“Look at me,” he murmured, beckoning her attention to the other side of the back seat. When she connected her eyes with his, his usual calming aura took over her, softening the stressed crease between her brows. “It’s going to be okay.”

“Harry, I just blew my career up into smoke because I couldn’t deal with a rude interviewer,” she huffed at him.

“No,” he disagreed softly, moving the hand that rested on her arms to interlock his fingers with one of hers. “You stuck up for yourself to people who were ignoring your work and whittling you down to your relationship.”

“But it was rude.”

“It was necessary.”

The car ride to the venue for that night’s concert was quiet, but Harry never let go of her hand, brushing his thumb over her knuckles in a comforting touch. She wasn’t sure if she ever wanted him to let go.

***

It was the early hours of the morning by the time the pair returned to their tour bus and went to crawl into their bunks.

Her performance had gone well and Harry was mesmerizing (as always). He was truly hypnotizing to watch while he performed and she hadn’t missed watching him yet, even as they drew close to the end of the tour. It was the best part of her day and she would miss it dearly after the last show.

She was almost asleep, curtain drawn and cuddled under a pile of blankets, when her cell began to ring. Her heart sank, knowing only one person who would know when she had a sliver of free time (even though it’s debatable if sleeping counts as free time). She was going to get scolded like she was a little kid in the principal's office and she knew it.

“Hi Jeff,” she answered with a sigh as she pulled the curtain back and slid from the bunk, the cold air of the tour bus nipping at her legs.

Her gaze was met by a snuggled up Harry wearing a concerned face across from her in his own bed. He never closed the curtain, not even when she asked politely to muffle his snores, always saying something about how it made him claustrophobic. He sent her a tired smile and mouthed “good luck,” extending a hand for a fist bump as she passed. Knocking their knuckles together put a brief smile on her face before she buckled in for the chewing out she was about to get.

Harry watched her intently as she paced up and down the front of the tour bus as she spoke to Jeff, too far away for him to listen in. Her face gradually turned from anxious, to surprised, to something that would have probably been happiness if she wasn’t so tired.

“Alright, thank you for everything.” She spoke softly when she finally returned to be within earshot for him. “Goodnight Jeff.”

“So?” he murmured groggily at her, brows raised in question at her.

“People loved it,” she said shocked, like she didn’t fully believe it herself. “They think I’m some kind of badass for shutting down a sexist. Which is, like, a lot,” she spoke with a disbelieving chuckle, unable to find the right words in her groggy state. “I don’t really know what to make of it.”

Harry seemed to spring up from his spot in his bed, smacking his head on the top of the bunk in the process, prompting them both to dissolve into a puddle of giggles.

“Don’t get too excited for me,” she laughed. “I cannot be the reason that you hurt yourself and have to cancel a show.”

“I was just too excited to say ‘I told you so,’” he smirked, now rubbing the side of his head through his curls.

“Cocky bastard,” she sarcastically murmured under her breath while dramatically rolling her eyes.

She watched with confusion as Harry left his bed, and after a short and frantic search for his pajama pants so he wouldn’t “offend her eyes,” he moved towards the front of the bus. Her eyes trailed him as he bent down to the small mini fridge and pulled out two beers.

“We have to celebrate.”

It was 2 AM and she had been so ready for bed after a long day. But she knew she could never say no to him. She thanked god that they had a day off tomorrow.

After retrieving her massive and lovingly worn Grateful Dead sweatshirt to protect her from the chilly air, she nearly ran to the front of the bus. His painted pink fingers moved with skill as he popped the bottle caps off with one of his rings, handing it to her and gently nudging his bottle against hers.

“Cheers,” he murmured softly as he looked down at her with a kindhearted smile.

“Cheers,” she seemed to whisper back to him, a flutter in her stomach reminding her how badly she wanted to reach out and connect her lips to his. Instead she slid into the small booth across from him, taking a long sip from the bottle as she watched him do the same.

“I want you to know that I was really proud of you today,” he said as he put his beer down on the table. “Rude interviewers are never easy and you handled it like a champ.”

“Thank you, H,” she nodded, suddenly bashful and unable to make eye contact with him. Her cheeks burned hot as she put all her focus into tracing the rim of the bottle with her finger tip.

“Hey,” he called for her attention and her eyes snapped up to meet his. “I mean it, Y/N.”

“I know you do,” she gently nodded at him. “I’m just really happy they didn’t ask about my ex,” she chuckled as she took another sip. “That would have gone very poorly.”

“Oh yeah, I was a little annoyed they brought up my ex but not yours,” he teased. “Not fair if you ask me.”

“Well, then I’m glad no one asked you.”

“Can I ask you?”

“What?”

“About your ex.”

She should have been prepared to talk about it with Harry at some point. Half of this plan had been devised to get back at James anyway. She should be able to talk about it by now, especially with someone she had grown so close to.

“I guess so,” she shrugged, trying to seem casual like the mere mention of him didn’t still hurt her heart a little bit. “What do you want to know?”

“As much as you’re willing to tell me.”

He looked soft like this, eyes slightly sleepy with a tenderness in them as he looked back at her. His hair was unruly and puffy and he was wrapped in the powder blue blanket that lived on the tour bus’ couch. She would have told him anything that he ever wanted to hear if he kept looking like this.

With a deep breath, she began to recount everything that went down.

“I met James while I was still working as a waitress. I recognized him from his movies and started a conversation, and then–to my surprise–he asked me out on a date. I had been in LA for three weeks and this insanely famous actor is asking me to go out with him, so I obviously said yes.” She paused to take a swig of her beer, before mumbling under her breath, “I should have said ‘fuck no’ to that.”

A smile ghosted over her lips as she listened to Harry’s laugh across the table. She swore that laugh could cure cancer.

“But I didn’t,” she continued. “He introduced me to the right people and helped me make the right connections in the industry, which I guess made me feel indebted to him. Does that make sense?”

“Of course,” Harry nodded, eyebrows furrowed and listening intently.

“I should have broken up with him after I signed with Jeff and the label, however awful that sounds. But he just always knew the right things to say to make me feel special and like I was the most important person in the world. Even after I found out he was talking to other girls, he was somehow able to talk himself out of it.” She shook her head as she recalled it. “You wanna hear something fucked up?”

“Always,” he said with a gentle smirk.

“He proposed to me using lines from a romcom he was working on.”

Harry nearly spit out his drink. “Holy shit, you’re kidding!”

“I wish. I didn’t find out until I went with him to the premier a few months later and the proposal scene sounded surprisingly familiar.”

“What a dirtbag.”

“I know, right?” she laughed. “Then a few weeks after that, he got papped with his tongue down another girl’s throat. That finally knocked some sense into me and I ran for the hills.”

“Fuck,” he sighed as he finished his beer. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” she breathed. “I don’t even feel hurt by him anymore, ya know? I just feel angry at myself for trusting him.”

“I understand but it’s not your fault he was a piece of shit,” he said as he rose from his seat and traveled to the mini fridge once again. “Another?” he asked, holding the bottle up about his head.

“Fuck it,” she shrugged. “Sure.”

She watched him skillfully pop off the tops again using just his rings, making a mental note to make him teach her how he did that, before he flopped back down in his seat.  

“At the risk of sounding like a Facebook mom, ‘you grow through what you go through,’” she chuckled, taking another long sip as she finished her first. He matched her high pitched giggle across the table and she nearly drooled beer down her front from smiling so wide.

“Amen, sister,” he agreed, raising his beer in the air.

“Oh, that was awful.” She shook her head as she descended into giggles. “Please never say that again.”

“Noted.”

“Anyway,” she began again after another sip of her drink, “I was well prepared to get my heartbroken by untrustworthy men after you, Styles.”

“I’m offended–tell me more,” he spoke quickly, his signature narcissistic smirk settling onto his features.

“I need you to know that Zayn leaving was my first real heartbreak.”

“Were the rest of us chopped liver?”

“You weren’t Zayn, I can tell you that.”

“Ouch!” He let out a loud belly laugh.

“Put yourself in my shoes for a minute, H. So first, the hottest-”

“Rude-”

“-I’m speaking. So the hottest one leaves, and then the rest of you are all like ‘we’ll be back in 18 months,’” she mocked him in a high pitched impersonation with a wave, “and then 6 months later you all mysteriously have solo careers.”

“I do not see you complaining about my solo career now, ya fame leetch.” He spoke with such humor and charisma, she couldn’t have even wished to be offended by his joke.

“Absolutely not, sir,” she said sternly, giving him a dramatic salute. “Deepest apologies from the fame leetch.” The two collapsed into giggles, laughing until their sides began to ache.

“Wait, I have a question for mega superstar Mr. Harry Styles of former One Direction fame,” she announced.

“I believe that’s me,” he bowed his head and raised his hand into the hair. “Shoot.”

She barely could get the question out, laughing too hard at her own joke. “Is Taylor Swift a good kisser?”

“Oh god,” he exasperatedly threw his hands in the air, chuckling while rolling his eyes dramatically before grinning wide as he thought over his answer. “I don’t kiss and tell,” he finally smirked.

“Wait, I have another!”

“Watch it, smart ass.”

“You think I’m smart?” she teased as she feigned flattery. “Have you ever heard of a song called ‘English Love Affair?’” He narrowed his eyes at her, a knowing smirk crossing his lips as he shook his head at her. “Also, when do I get to meet Gemma?”

“I’ll consider it when you stop bringing up her sex life, perv.”

“We’ve been dating for a few months now,” she teased as she continued to prod, emboldened by the liquid courage running through her veins as she was now half way through her next beer. “I think I should be allowed to meet the family soon. They seem delightful.”

“They would love how you have decided to rip into me like this,” he said with a cheeky smile, dimples on full display.

“Rockstars have to get knocked down a peg every once in a while.” She sarcastically shrugged. “Consider it a favor.”

She couldn’t help but think about how right this felt. Their back and forth flowed so smoothly, the banter falling from their lips without effort. Their laughter joined together in a delightful melody and she imagined they could go on this way all night.

Spending any amount of time with him made her so fucking happy; and time spent teasing each other over beers caused her to nearly explode with joy. How much she was enjoying herself was too hard to put into words.

He was safe and he was kind and he made her laugh no matter how bad his jokes were.

He was her best friend.

And for the first time, she was willing to admit that she was in love with him.

“Harry,” she hummed softly as their laughter died down to a comfortable silence. “Thank you for everything. You’ve changed my life forever and I can never repay you.”

“Just remember me when you get famous.”

“Oh shut up, I’m being serious,” she playfully scolded before letting her tone drop back into honesty. “You’re a very good person and I’m eternally grateful for you letting me be your opening act and then agreeing to this whole relationship charade.”

“I didn’t ‘let’ you be anything, Y/N. I picked you myself.”

Her brows furrowed in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“I listened to your album when it came out and fell in love with it,” he shrugged, his casual tone contradicting the surprised raise of her pulse. “When I found out Jeff also managed you, I knew I had to have you on the tour.”

Y/N was honestly stunned. She had always assumed that the tour was Jeff’s doing, a careful arrangement pairing Full Stop’s new up-and-comer with their most famous and established talent. Being offered the tour had been the biggest opportunity and honor she had ever been presented with; but she had never considered Harry himself being behind it.

“Oh,” was all she could manage to get out.

It was now his turn to be confused. “What’s so surprising about that?” he asked, reading the shock on her face like she was an open book.

“I just,” she stammered, trying to find the words in her slightly hazy state. “I never would have thought you knew who I was or listened to my music.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know,” she trailed off. “You’re you, and I’m just... me, I guess.”

He didn’t respond right away, just looking at her intently and slightly amused, sea glass eyes boring into her with a pink lip held between his teeth.

He scanned her frame, from the way her hair sat messily on top of her head and the way the massive sweatshirt swallowed her body enough to where she had pulled her knees up to her chest underneath it. Her shoulders were slumped slightly, making her appear smaller as she held her legs close to her torso and her eyebrows were knitted together in worry, slightly nervous under his intense gaze.

She downed the rest of her beer in an attempt to forget his intense attention. It didn’t work.

“You really don’t know how incredible you are, do you?” he finally asked, the corner of his lips twitching into a small smile.

She felt her whole body burn with his compliment, wanting to shrink into herself and disappear completely from his view. She finally shook her head slightly in an attempt to deflect his words, breathing his name under her breath as if to scold him for being too kind.

“You are,” he insisted, ignoring her objection. “You’re so talented and your music deserves all the attention that it gets. I am honored that I get to play a part in helping expose the world to you and what you have to offer.”

“Thank you.” Her words came out as a whisper.

“You’re welcome, love.”

His pet name made her stomach turn in a nervous excitement and a wide grin involuntarily came to her lips.

“I like it when I make you smile like that.” His words only made her beam further. “You look very pretty when you smile.”

“Stop it,” she said softly, cheeks burning hot and having a hard time making eye contact with him.

“Stop what?” He feigned innocence as he lightly teased her, smirk still prominent on his features.

“Are you flirting with me, Styles?”

“Just practicing.”

His words rang through her mind long after they had left the table and crawled back into their bunks for the night. She wished she could see inside his head to understand whatever thoughts were running around his brain.

But for now she could just peak at him through the gap she had purposely left in her curtain, wondering if she ever popped into his dreams as he slept.

He was always in hers.

***

There was a sadness mixed in with her usually thrilled mood as she took the stage for the last show of the tour. While there was an element of relief as she looked forward to some well needed rest, the adrenaline and joy of being in front of a crowd was something that she would miss dearly. She had grown into a real performer over the last two months as they zig-zagged across the US and this period of time would have a special place in her heart long after it had ended.

But there was another reason why she was so sad to see this chapter come to an end. As far as she knew, a staged breakup was not far away and the thought of being without Harry was heartbreaking. He had become her person and soon their feux falling out would be on the front page of every magazine. She wanted nothing more in the world than for their relationship to be real, but it would be forced to end before it had even truely started.

She got choked up as she sang her final song that night, letting a few tears escape as she took in the thousands of people singing her lyrics back to her, flashlights swaying in the air to the beat of the music. Taking a move from Harry’s own playbook, she took her mic and directed it to the crowd to sing as she cried. The vibrations of the drums and bass behind her nestled it’s way into her bones and the chorus of singing voices in the crowd surrounded her in a bittersweet melody.

The past two months she had been on top of the world, and as soon as this song finished, it was the beginning of the end.

She took her final bow, watching as the small tears fell forward onto the dusty stage below her. She waved and blew kisses to the crowd, then nearly ran off the stage looking for the only person she wanted to see.

Harry was right where he always was, just out of view behind the curtain, holding his arms out for her to fall into.

“Awe, babe,” he hummed sympathetically when she settled her head onto his chest, surely ruining his crisp white t-shirt with her now wet makeup. “It’s okay. Final shows are always tough.” He rubbed her back gently, in a soothing rhythm.

He smelled so good. He smelled like home.

She tilted her head up to connect her glassy eyes with his. “I just don’t want this all to end.” She knew she wasn’t just talking about the tour.

“Neither do I,” he said as his lips curved into a devilish smirk that sent her heart into palpitations. “That’s why I have one last surprise for you.”

“Oh, Harry,” she sighed while wiping the remaining tears off her cheeks. “What have you done?”

“You said you liked surprises!” he defended.

“Not surprises in front of 20,000 people!”

“I promise you’re going to love this one, okay?” His voice was softer now, encouraging and supportive. “You’re going to come out and sing an extra song with me during my set,” he revealed.

“Sing what?”

“That’s the surprise.”

“Do I even know the words?”

“You definitely know the words,” he chuckled.

“I just finished sobbing. I can’t go out there like this.”

“You can fix your makeup. I believe in you.”

“What am I going to wear?” she asked, grasping at straws at this point, doing anything she could to get out of this.

“I had Lambert put something together for you.”

“Of course you did.”

She peppered him with a few more questions, but he had a smooth and charming answer to every single one. He had thought every detail out, and as always, she couldn’t say no to him.

“Fine,” she finally exasperatedly agreed, immediately met with his excited and dimpled smile that she had fallen head over heels for.

“Perfect,” he breathed. “I have to go get ready and so do you. I already put everything you need in your dressing room, okay?” She nodded, still biting her lip anxiously. He held her by her shoulders, lowering his head to match their eye level as he leaned in close, before he spoke. “You’re going to have fun. I promise.”

“Pinky swear?”

“Pinky swear.”

Seconds after they locked their little fingers together, he pressed a quick and protective kiss to her forehead that set her whole body ablaze before running off in the direction of his dressing room. She remained stunned and frozen in her spot for a few moments trying to process what it felt like to have his lips on her for the first time since that very first day they had met.

There was no audience to perform it for or an act to keep up behind the curtain. He kissed her because he wanted to.

She was finally snapped out of her daze when a stagehand bumped into her by accident, prompting her to begin the short walk back to her dressing room. But the ghost of his lips remained on her forehead, an incessant tingle placed there by his touch.

The dress she found waiting for her was one of the most beautiful gowns she had ever set her eyes on. Made of a light purple chiffon, the wrap dress’ long sleeves and floor length skirt flowed freely. A belt cinched the wispy fabric close to her waist and a deep-v exposed her neck and chest. But the most dazzling part of the dress were the red sequined hearts that dotted the fabric and reflected the light of the dressing room like a million little mirrors.

Slipping into it, the light fabric was soft against her skin, opaque enough but still slightly sheer to let light through and show off her legs and the bright red shiny pumps Lambert had left for her. She felt the most beautiful she had ever felt in this dress, boosting her confidence and quelling her nerves about whatever the hell Harry was planning.

“One minute to curtain,” was announced in an ominous voice over the arena’s backstage speakers as she finished fixing her makeup and she all but ran to make it back to the stage in time. She only had one more chance to watch him perform and she refused to miss a second of it.

Harry dazzled as the lights focused in on him, his deep blue and fully sequined suit reflecting the light and turning him into a human disco ball. He stood close to the edge of the stage as the beginning notes of the first song began being played by the band, but he made no move towards his mic stand to sing. His eyes were closed and his arms were outstretched to the audience, taking in every scream, every tear, and the thunderous shake of the building; but also giving himself to them.

Then the show began. As usual, he was electric, but tonight was like he had turned himself up to eleven. Every note he sang was full of his heart and every dance move was done with his entire body, even his bad jokes seemed funnier tonight.

She was so mesmerized she almost forgot about his ‘surprise.’ Almost.

“Since tonight is unfortunately our last show,” he pouted. “I thought I would do something special,” he spoke to the crowd as they roared, but quickly connected his eyes with her’s in the wings. By the smirk plastered on his face, she knew she was in for it.

“I recently found out that someone very close to me was a very big fan of…” he trailed off as he dramatically pretended to search for the right words, “my previous work.” He finished with a smirk and his words prompted the loudest reaction since he had been on stage.

“Now, I told her that she would be coming on stage to join me tonight, but I didn’t exactly tell her what we would be singing and I haven’t performed this song in a very long time, so cut us some slack if we mess up. This is very unrehearsed.” He kept sneaking glances back to her, as her eyes grew wider at the stunt he was currently pulling. “But I know for a fact that she knows all the words. I listen to her sing them in the shower quite often.” He wore a cheeky dimpled grin as he looked back at her once again.

The building was shaking due to the suspense he was creating, and looking down at her hands, she realized she was to. She gripped hard onto the mic a stagehand had just shoved at her, pleading with her hands to stop their tremors.

“Now, I would love it if you could all give another warm welcome to one of my favorite people on the planet, Y/N Y/L/N!” He turned his body to her for a final time, extending his hand out for her to take. Her legs felt like jello as she walked out into the bright lights towards him, interlocking her fingers with his as a way to keep her on her feet.

The audience’s screams were deafening at seeing the two of them together and she thanked god she had her earpieces in to protect her ear drums or they would have surely burst. She could only imagine the articles that would be written about this and the thousands of tweets that were probably already being sent.

“I’m gonna kick your ass,” she mouthed at him threateningly, but she couldn’t even get through the sentence before his dazzling smile began to quell her anxiety.

“The look on your face is 100% worth getting my ass kicked,” he answered smoothly before turning his attention back to the audience. “Everyone, sing along if you know the words,” he commanded their attention. “This is Ready to Run.”

Her jaw dropped and the crowd roared as the band behind her began to play the first few chords of the song she loved and knew so well. She had admitted it a few days ago that it was one of her favorites of his ‘previous work,’ but apparently he already knew that from the few showers she had taken on the tour bus.

“There’s a lightning in your eyes I can’t deny,” he began by himself, her brain still too shocked to jump in yet. He sang the first few lines to her with a giant grin plastered on his face, hand still holding tight to hers. His eyes had a playful glint in them that seemed to say ‘just have fun.’

“There’s a devil in your smile, it’s chasing me,” she finally began to sing, Harry fading his voice out so she could take the next few lines by herself as he admired her.

He did have a devilish smile, but it was one she loved with her entire heart. As she began to sing, she felt her muscles begin to relax into the song she had sung to herself so many times before, letting her body begin to bounce to the growing rhythm as her dress flowed around her.

The stage vibrated as Sarah beat her drums to introduce the chorus. “This time I’m ready to run, escape from the city and follow the sun,” the pair sang together, eyes still locked as their voices combined into the most perfect tune. “Cause I wanna be yours, don’t you wanna be mine?” they continued the lyrics. She felt herself meaning the words leaving her mouth more and more as they went on. She did want to be his, she couldn’t deny that. “I don’t wanna get lost in the dark of the night.”

Her apprehensiveness eased further as the music picked up and the hook went on, finally allowing herself to have a bit of fun. “Wherever you are is the place I belong,” they insisted towards each other, leaning in close before Harry grabbed her hand to dramatically spin her, the beautiful shining fabric of her dress splaying out around her. The next line was mumbled through giggles by both of them, but their laughter only added to the perfect moment they were having.

They danced across the stage together like there weren’t 20,ooo pairs of eyes watching them, both singing their hearts out to each other. It began to feel like they weren’t even there. It was just Y/N and Harry, serenading each other to one of her favorite songs.

“There’s a future in my eyes I can’t foresee,” she sang to him to start the second verse.

“Unless, of course, I stay on course and keep you next to me.” Harry grabbed her by her waist and pulled her into his side as he sang the words, prompting more giggles from her. She loved the way he smiled so wide as he sang, never breaking his eye contact with her and emitting pure joy. His eyes looked honest as he sang, like he meant every word just as much as she did.

The pair made their way through the rest of the verse and second chorus, flawlessly moving around the stage like they owned it. Y/N selfishly decided to let him have the bridge all to himself, needing to hear the way his beautiful voice hit the high notes. “This time I’m ready to run,” he sang passionately, executing the downward moving riff perfectly. “I’d give everything that I got for your love,” he pointed across the stage towards her, beckoning her back close to him. She quickly skipped to him at his request.

Like she had blinked, the song was already nearing its end.

“Cause I wanna be free and I wanna be young, I’ll never look back now I’m ready to run,” they belted the last lines out to each other. The band fell quiet on their last chord and the crowd exploded, but their noise fell on deaf ears as the pair stood so close their heaving chests were almost pressed up against each other. His eyes stared down into hers and she watched as his eyes flickered quickly down to her lips.

The world ceased to exist when he pressed his mouth to hers, even if it only lasted a second. It was nothing more than a peck, but it was everything to her. Her body igniting with heat and eyes full of shock, she looked back at him in simultaneous confusion and adoration, before realizing they had been staring at each other for too long. She needed to get off the stage so he could continue with his show. She walked back slowly towards the wings, letting the hand he had still been holding fall to her side. She waved and smiled to the crowd the best she could in her clouded mind.

“Thank you everyone!” she shouted into her mic as she moved out of their view. She shoved her mic into the first set of hands that would take it as she wobbled her way over to a table with water bottles. She nearly choked as she tried to suck one down, hoping it would ease the dizzy feeling he had created with his lips. Her lips burned just as her forehead had earlier in the night.

He had kissed her. He had sang a love song with her and then he had kissed her. She couldn’t decipher if that kiss was a confirmation that he shared the same feelings for her or if it was just another act for the cameras. But his mouth felt so right against hers. They fit together like a pair of puzzle pieces. She tried to suppress the optimistic hope that rose in her chest, but it began to swallow her whole.

When she heard his next song begin, she made her way back to the spot that had become hers at the side of the stage. She watched him perform the rest of the show in a loving haze, doe eyed and hypnotized, lips still buzzing from his contact.

He gave it his all. By the last song he was out of breath, drenched in sweat, and looked like he was about to pass out at any second. The crowd applauded for minutes after he left the stage and they were still cheering when she finally caught sight of him again. His curls were stuck to his forehead and his skin was shiny and flushed. He was panting, still trying to recover from his workout of a finale show; but he was beaming. His smile seemed to turn him into a beacon, emitting a light and positive energy that drew everyone backstage towards him.

She was so transfixed on Harry as he thanked the crew and accepted congratulations from all around that she just about jumped out of her skin when Jeff slinked up behind her and whispered ‘boo’ in her ear.

“What the fuck, Jeff,” she chuckled as she caught her breath, resting her hand on her chest and feeling her racing heartbeat.

“I just wanted to congratulate you on being half of the best fake couple out there,” he teased. “That kiss was perfect. People are losing their minds over it.”

“Oh,” she said softly, feeling every emotion she was distracted from while watching Harry rush back into her. Her heart sank as she remembered all the questions that continued to haunt her since she got off stage. “Thanks,” she murmured, plastering a smile onto her face. “I’m glad we could make you proud.”

“If you two could convince me, you can convince anyone.” Jeff walked off moments later, leaving her to sit in her confused thoughts as he disappeared into the hoards of bodies waiting for their minute with Harry.

She knew that she didn’t ‘convince’ Jeff of anything on her part. Everything she did with Harry was authentic and truthful. Including the thrilled grin that appeared on her face when she finally made eye contact with the exhausted man across the room. She gave him a shy wave that he sheepishly returned, biting back a shy smile. He pointed in the direction of his dressing room and mouthed “meet me in 15.”

She could never say no to him.

Fifteen minutes later, she was knocking on the large wooden door that had a single piece of paper that read STYLES haphazardly taped onto it. When it finally flew open, she was met by a soaking wet Harry with a towel hanging dangerously low on his hips. Her eyes trailed down his body without permission, taking in the toned torso that was decorated with his beautiful tattoos. Her eyes hovered over the two ferns that sat on his pelvis, too fascinated with the dark ink to pull her eyes away just yet.

She had obviously seen him in various states of undress before. They lived together on a tour bus without much space to exist with privacy, but this was different. He wasn’t rushing to get dressed or quickly changing his outfit. And he wasn’t moving away from her gaze at all.

If she hadn’t been so entranced by him, she would have noticed he was looking her up and down in the exact same manner.

She had changed since she had seen him last. The skin-tight black velvet romper she had brought along for the afterparty now fit her snuggly and held her every curve. The dark fabric was tight and appeared almost painted on, a rainbow racing stripe making its way down either side of her chest. The short shorts of the outfit exposed nearly all of her legs and the deep neckline put much of her chest on display as well. It’s long sleeves were her favorite part, as a strip of fringe dangled from below her arms any time she moved.

“You look great,” Harry finally choked out, his voice pulling their eyes back up to the other’s face.

“Oh, thanks,” she said, slightly awkwardly. “You too.”

“Well, I’m hopefully not going to the after party dressed like this,” he chuckled before stepping aside and ushering her into the room.

His dressing room was much larger than hers and she settled herself on the brown leather couch in the corner as she waited for him to get ready, sneaking glances up from her phone often. She chuckled as she watched him spend far too long fussing with his curls in the mirror, but was quickly distracted by the way his back and arms flexed when he reached up to muse his hair. Once he was satisfied with the way it fell, he disappeared into the bathroom at the back of the room. When he emerged, he was finally dressed, allowing her to take a deep breath and to focus on something other than his bare skin for the first time since he had opened the door.

The black satin suit was simple for him, but the tight white tank top that sat underneath hugged every muscle in his torso. She knew as soon as he got in the hot club, he would lose the jacket, and she would be devastatingly distracted once again.

The narcissist took one final look at himself in the mirror before turning to her and extending a hand. “Ready, darling?”

“You just spent 15 minutes exclusively on your hair and you’re asking me if I’m ready?” she teased as she took his hand, weaving her fingers between his as they exited the room together.

He leaned down close to her ear as they walked down the now mostly empty hallway, lips brushing over the hollow of her ear as he spoke. “I could have done it faster, but you were so obviously enjoying the show.”

“Relax yourself, Magic Mike,” she muttered indignantly, but hung her head in a way she hoped he couldn’t see how flustered he made her. Was she really that obvious?

They walked hand in hand out to the parking garage, now caught in a back and forth about whether or not Harry could be a male stripper. He said yes. She said no, although she did admit at one point that he worked his mic stand like a pole.

“Hey Jeff,” he called when they finally reached the parking garage where Jeff and Glenne had been waiting for them to head to the club. “Do you think I could be a stripper?”

“I think people would pay a lot to see it, but they may be disappointed in your dancing skills.”

“Come on,” he playfully whined. “I have some moves.”

“You have one move,” Y/N cut in with a chuckle, “and it’s the wiggle.” She brought her hands up near her chest, tilted her head back while dramatically biting her lip, and swayed her arms by her sides, earning a chorus of laughter from the people around her.

She hadn’t even realized she had done the move without releasing Harry’s hand first, dragging his arm into her dance as well, until their manager commented on it. “You know, you two don’t have to be holding hands all the time and keeping the show up back here,” he said with a slightly suspicious quirk in his eyebrows.

Her smile had been in the process of fading, like they had been caught doing something wrong, before Harry answered smoothly. “We know. Just practicing.”

There were those words again. Just practicing, she thought over to herself. But was he practicing anymore? How many flirty comments, heartfelt compliments, and warm touches did it take to cross the line of practicing to the real thing?

She wasn’t sure about Harry, but she knew that she wasn’t just practicing anymore.

She knew that the way they sat nearly on top of each other in the large SUV on the way to the club felt more than friendly. And the way he hadn’t stopped touching her in some way since they left his dressing room insinuated far more than something with business-like intentions. And the way he looked at her everytime he caught her eye the entire way to the club, always with a bright smile and adoring gaze that she always returned, pulled at her heartstrings far more than they should have if this was all an act.

A sloppy and cheeky grin settled almost permanently on his features after he had a few drinks in him, his arms moving in a lazy and fluid manner as she took in his many tattoos that he had exposed when he ditched his jacket (just like she knew he would). His butterfly was visible through the tight ribbed fabric of the white tank top and the little birds that peaked out from underneath seemed to be inviting her even closer to him in her now inebriated state.

All she wanted to do was to connect her lips with his as she watched him make conversation with someone from his management, entranced by the way his perfect mouth moved as he spoke. She once again craved the shocks of electricity that were created between them at the contact and could not stop thinking about it no matter how hard she tried. The protective hand that had settled onto her hip and continued to hold her close to his body just wasn’t enough anymore.

The pair had been drinking far too much; martinis turning into vodka sodas that had turned into straight tequila shots. She believed it was tequila shot four that did her in. The last thing she remembered was licking the line of salt off the back of her hand, downing the shot, and being entranced by Harry’s eyes as she bit down on the slice of lime he held carefully with his jeweled fingers.  

***

The next morning, Y/N woke up in a hotel room that she didn’t recognize with a pounding headache and a swirling gut. It felt like she had been hit with a truck and she could barely pick her head up off the pillow.

She had so many questions about what had happened the night before. Where was she? Who let her drink that much? Whose clothes was she wearing? But most of all, what the hell happened after that fourth shot?

But she realized the worst was yet to come when she heard soft snoring coming from beside her. She knew that snoring well. It was the snoring that kept her up half the night for the last two months and the one that had almost driven her to suffocating her bus-mate in his sleep; the snoring that matched the crumbled black suit she just noticed in a ball on the floor.

It took every ounce of strength in her body to pull herself from the pillow and turn around in the bed to have her suspicions confirmed.

There he was.

His dark long eyelashes were fluttered down across the tops of his cheeks and his hair was going in every direction, skin clammy like his body was trying to rid itself of all the poison he had ingested the night before. The crumpled comforter was pushed down his stomach, his bare skin holding a sheen that helped define every dip or curve of his muscles and the tiniest bit of the band of his boxers peaked out to assure her that he at least wasn’t fully naked next to her.

Why were they in bed together? And why did he look so good? Oh my god, she thought as a possibility dawned on her. Did we sleep together?

“Harry,” she murmured softer than she intended, voice scratchy and mouth dry. The soreness at the back of her throat clued her into the copious amounts of screaming she must have done last night. He didn’t stir at her gentle coaxing, the light streaming through the windows making him look angelic as it covered him in a blanket of soft light while he continued to sleep.

It was a hard nudge to his chest that finally made him open his eyes, immediately releasing a groan she was sure she made when she regained consciousness too. He looked at her puzzled, still rubbing sleep out of his eyes as he propped himself up on his elbows. He took an equally confused look around the hotel room before looking back at her. She watched as the gears slowly turned in his head until his eyes opened wide and he spring up into a sitting position to mirror hers.

“We didn’t,” he whispered hopefully. “Oh my god, did we?” he asked, a look of horror crossing his face that matched her own.

“I have no idea,” she anxiously replied. “I was hoping you would know!”

“You don’t remember anything?”

“The last thing I remember was doing tequila shots with you.”

“I remember those.” He rubbed his eyes hard like it would somehow jog his memory. His eyebrows knit together, buried in thought as he searched his brain for a timeline. “I can follow the night up until we did karaoke.”

“We did karaoke?” she repeated incredulously and was met with a somber nod. “Do I even want to know what we sang?”

He shook his head slowly, shame clear on his face, before he finally mumbled. “We did ‘It’s Raining Men.’”

“Oh my god, no,” she whined, holding her head in her hands and rubbing her temples. There were surely videos of them sloppily singing on top of a bar circulating online and she wasn’t sure how Jeff would be able to spin that one in a positive light.

“Where’s your phone?” he asked, a hopeful glint in his eye as he reached for his own. “Maybe there’s something on there that can clue us in.” It took her a moment but she finally spotted it on the ground in the corner of the room. She said a silent prayer that it wasn’t dead or broken.

Forcing her heavy limbs out from under the covers she made her way towards the device, but not before she heard a confused sound coming from Harry. “How did you get my clothes?”

Looking down at herself and taking in the red lettering that read But Daddy I Love Him across her chest, it clicked that the t-shirt and baggy basketball shorts were his. But how they hell did she get into them?

“I think we’ve established at this point that I don’t know anything that happened after about midnight, Harry.” Her words came out laced with slight frustration. She hoped he knew she wasn’t annoyed with him, just their situation.

“Just a question, princess.”

She ignored his quip and began to search through her texts, call history, and photos, hoping to find anything at all that could help trace their steps through the night. She found nothing but a few selfies of them still at the club. One was the pair casually smiling, the next was one of him kissing her on the cheek that made her skin warm, but the final one made her snort out a laugh.

“What’s so funny?”

“I have a picture on my phone of you with two martini olives shoved up your nose,” she spoke through hysterical laughter. “Definitely birthday post material if you ask me.”

“Let me see,” he demanded with an adorable scowl.

She passed her phone over to him, still letting a few chuckles fall past her lips. “I’m gonna change your name in my phone to ‘Olive Nose Styles.”

“You're cruel.”

“You’re the one that put olives up his nose and then posed for a picture!”

“Whatever,” he grumbled, turning attention back to his own screen to continue his investigation. “There’s nothing of use on my phone either.”

The two flopped back on the bed, staring at the ceiling in the frustrated confusion. There was so much of their night that had gone up into smoke, completely unaccounted for with no clues as to what they did. Each traced their steps over and over again in their heads as they hoped desperately for a single detail that would lead them down a path to bigger memories, but it never came.

“Are we going to have to call Jeff and ask him what happened?” she finally murmured.

“I think so.”

“He’s going to put us both in client timeout, isn’t he?”

“We’re probably already there,” he groaned as he picked up his phone and hit Jefe Jeff-e in his contact list, putting the call on speaker and resting it on his still bare chest. The man on the other end picked up almost immediately.

“Morning Sleeping Beauty, I was wondering when I was going to hear from you.”

“Hi Jeff,” he groggily started then stopped, searching for the words that would make this all less uncomfortable. “Y/N and I have some questions about last night.”

Jeff let out a strained chuckle. “Yeah, that doesn’t really surprise me after last night’s bar bill.”

“Um,” Harry hummed, stammering but unable to form any real words.

“You sing about sex for a living,” she hissed at the man next to her before yanking the phone off his chest. “Jeff,” she started, taking over the conversation for them both. “Do you know if we slept together?”

“Probably not. You both were pretty unconscious when I put you in the hotel room.” His words prompted a massive sigh from both of them, looking to each other to share a relieved smile.

“Oh thank god,” they mumbled in unison.

“Jinx,” he smirked under his breath, prompting a ‘shut up’ from her.

“How did I get into Harry’s clothes?”

“I stopped by the tour bus when I realized you two probably shouldn’t be trusted not to roll out of your top bunks. I got you some clothes to sleep in before we took you guys to the hotel.”

“But why Harry’s?”

It was Jeff’s term to get squirmy. “I felt weird going through your things.”

“But you were perfectly fine with going through mine?” Harry asked, only half joking.

“Absolutely,” he deadpanned. They were all quiet for a moment before Jeff began again. “You two really don’t remember anything else that happened?”

“Everything after about two is unaccounted for,” she confessed.

“Oh,” Jeff chuckled. “So, you don’t remember when you stuck your tongues down each other’s throats on the ride home?”

Fuck.

Her eyes raced up to Harry’s from the phone she had been staring at like it held all the secrets of the night before. His easily readable features displayed all his emotions that surely matched hers. His pupils had grown in surprise, taking over nearly all the green in his wide eyes, and an embarrassed blush tinted his cheeks in a red hot flush that had reached the tips of his ears. His eyes flashed to the blank wall in front of them, running a stressed hand through his curls, like if he wasn’t looking at her, he would be able to focus better on the newly revealed information.

She couldn’t say that she didn’t relate. Her mind often went blank when she looked at him too. But right now, it was racing, occupied by anxious thoughts and intense emotions she couldn’t quite place, but felt with her entire being.

Her inevitable downward spiral was interrupted when Harry stiffly cleared his throat. “Uh,” he started, scratching the back of his neck uncomfortably. “We’ll see you later.”

“Sounds good, love birds,” Jeff replied, a clear snark apparent in his voice. Neither of the pair dignified his teasing with a response, Y/N quickly ending the call.

Silence hung heavy in the air and she let her eyes hover over the phone for too long when she settled it down on the bed, unwilling to connect her eyes with his just yet. Harry always had a way of staring into her and revealing all her cards to him before she even knew them herself. She wanted to hold them close to her chest for a moment, protecting the heart that longed for him more than anything else in the world.

There were no words exchanged between the two for a while as they silently took turns in the bathroom and occupied their hands and thoughts by their phones. They walked on eggshells anytime one neared the other. A tension like this hadn’t existed since the very first day they met, the first day they had begun to pretend.

Maybe that's why Harry was being so quiet. Maybe he never wanted to cross that line of pretending like she did. Maybe she had been blinded by his generally friendly personality and tricked herself into thinking there was anything more than a charade between them. Maybe last night really was just a drunken mistake, no matter how much she wanted it to be more.

“Maybe it’s a good thing that we don’t remember what happened last night,” she finally murmured from the opposite end of the room. She rested the side of her still heavy head and muscles against the wall, arms crossed in front of her as if they could keep her safe from the tension they had created. Her fingers nervously played with the hem of his t-shirt she was still dressed in.

“Why is it a good thing?” he almost immediately responded from the chair on the other side of the room he had settled himself into, running his hands along the satin pants of last night’s outfit he had put back on during their awkward shuffling around the room. He had even put physical space between them since they found out what happened, causing her heart to feel as if it was teetering on the edge of disintegrating.

“Well,” she stuttered, refusing to look at him and continuing to pick at her nail polish. “We’re just pretending so it would be weird if we really remembered it.”

“I don’t think it would be weird.”

“I don’t know,” she tried to maneuver her way around his response. “It might just be embarrassing to think about it.”

He let out a long and frustrated sigh, running his hands down his face. There was so much going on behind his eyes and she wished he would say something, anything, to break down the wall that hadn’t existed between them in months that was slowly reappearing.

“Do you regret it?” he asked bluntly, the abrupt question shocking her body to attention. “Do you regret any of this? Any of us?”

Did she regret drinking too much? Yes. Did she regret making out with him in front of their manager? Yes. Did she regret denying her feelings and pretending they didn’t exist for so long? Of course. But, did she regret falling in love with him? Never, not even for a second.

“No, I don’t,” she let out with a gentle shake of her head, no louder than a whisper.

“Neither do I.”

The words had barely left his lips before he crossed the room and crashed them into hers. The same fire she had felt on stage returned ten times over as his lips moved smoothly over hers, every neuron in her body lighting up like a switchboard. Her fingers reached up to curl into his hair and pull his lips impossibly closer to hers as her heart hammered in her chest with a passionate love she had kept under wraps for so long.

He tasted like the spicy peppermint toothpaste the hotel stocked in the bathroom and smelled like the tiny bottles of shampoo that rested on the side of the bathtub; but there was so much else about him that was completely unique–wholly irreplaceable and indescribable. He was just Harry.

Teeth clashed, lips were bitten, and hair was pulled as they took in every sensation the other created. His lips had been the only thought that captivated her mind since they were on stage the night before and her return to them did not disappoint. If her head wasn’t dizzy and her lungs not screaming at her for air, she would have stayed in that moment forever

When they finally disconnected, they stood against each other in a heaving and disheveled mess of heavy breathing and adoringly dazed smiles. She swore she could feel the pounding of his heart under her fingertips that rested on his chest.

“That was nice,” he eventually murmured down at her through heavy breaths, a love drunk grin finding its way onto his swollen lips.

“Yeah, I agree,” she hummed breathlessly, her anxious thoughts quiet and calm for the first time she could remember since she met him.

“I’m kind of disappointed I don’t remember doing that the first time,” he chuckled softly at her, shaking his head lightly in embarrassment with his pink tinged cheeks on full display.

“That’s okay. We were ‘just practicing’ then, right?” A giggle left her lips as she used the words against him. The same words he had used every time they let a glimpse of their true affections for each other slip past their guarded and friendly facade.

His dimples were exposed when he smiled a giant grin and let out a knowing huff, piecing together that she had caught onto his trail of excuses. “Yeah, just practicing,” he repeated softly, before his tone turned sincere and genuine. “I don’t want us to pretend anymore.”

“Good,” she said softly as her fingers slid up his neck to beckon his lips back down to hers. “I never was.”

“Neither was I.” She watched a soft smirk appear on his lips as they hovered over hers. “Do you want to keep not practicing?”

“Depends,” she quipped, lips brushing over his as she spoke. “Am I better kisser than Taylor Swift?

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING!! REBLOGS AND FEEDBACK MEAN THE WORLD!!! 

An extra for our babies can be found here!

[perhaps-in-anotherdream]

[CN] Victor’s Glass Boat Date (Eng Translation)

⌚Warning⌚ This post contains detailed spoilers for a date, 玻璃船之约 , that is yet to be released in the global server! ♡

[Translation Under The Cut]

┈┈ ◍♡◍ ┈┈┈ ◍♡◍ ┈┈

—

[Note]: Link to the video – YouTube || Bilibili

[T/N]: If you can, you ABSOLUTELY MUST, MUST, MUST follow with the video. Or you really are gonna miss out BIG TIME. (✯ᴗ✯)

-

—

✧ [SECTION 1] ✧

MC: Sunscreen, sunglasses, where did I put the hat I bought the last time....

Ding!

A crisp e-mail alert sounds, and I spring up from the side of the luggage almost reflexively.

My heart already leaps to my throat the instant I see the sender’s name.

—— Here it is! After waiting for four work e-mails, eight billing e-mails and sixteen spam e-mails, it finally came!

I draw in a deep breath and nervously click on the e-mail.

MC: [reading in English] “Dear Ms MC, I’m sorry that your subject failed, but if you have new subject, you can post again....”

My gaze rests on the word “failed” for a long, long time, my heart slowly sinking to the bottom along with it.

I did not get through.

This is a biennial professional development course personally taught by the national treasure, Director Stanley Anderson.

As long as you submit the subject of your film in the director’s work mailbox, you can have the opportunity to participate in his ten-person mini sessions.

Therefore, countless students, teachers, actors, and producers around the entire world have crowded for this learning opportunity.

I didn’t get selected two years ago. This time I figured I’d had a lot of experiences and prepared for a long time too, but the result still turns out to be....

I close the e-mail in a daze, and sit on a chair in trance, staring sheepishly at the unpacked luggage.

MC: Was I being far too confident in myself? But when I showed it to my peers, they all said it had a great shot....

MC: There’s still half a month to go until the closing date for registration, and I can still re-submit. But in half a month’s deadline, do I have enough time to think about a new theme....

MC: Sigh, I was actually planning to wait till Victor comes back and tell him....

Victor: Tell me what?

MC: !!!

Stunned, I turn my head to look back, and find that Victor has been standing at the bedroom doorway at some point.

Seeing him looking at me with a slight tilt of his head, I hastily pull out a smile at him.

MC: When did you come home? And how come you didn’t make any sound at all?

Victor: I called out to you from the living room when I opened the door, but didn’t get any reply from you.

Victor: Surprised? What’s with that guilty look on your face?

MC: N-no, I’m just a little baffled. After all, you’re usually working overtime at this time.

Victor: In order to catch up with a certain someone’s long-awaited vacation tomorrow, I’ll of course complete all my work in advance.

With that, Victor loosens his tie and walks into the bedroom. He sweeps his glance at the suitcase on the floor, and then at the laptop on the bed.

Victor: What about you? Have you completed all your work?

MC: I....

As though by some curious coincidence, I nod lightly as I open my mouth to speak.

MC: Of course, I’ve completed everything too.

—

┈┈ ◍♡◍ ┈┈┈ ◍♡◍ ┈┈

—

✧ [SECTION 2] ✧

Anna: Don’t be too sad. There’s still half a month to go! Perhaps you’ll get a sudden spark of inspiration in this half month?

MC: Mm....

Anna: Have you talked to your omnipotent CEO Victor about this? Has he said anything?

MC: No, I haven’t. I couldn’t figure out how to tell him yet.... Well, Anna, I know it in my heart.

MC: We’ve just arrived at the hotel, and we’re gonna tidy up first. I’ll talk to you later!

As I hang up the phone, Victor who is half-squatting in front of the luggage across from me, also raises his head.

Victor: Is there any problem at work?

MC: Ah no problem! It’s just that Anna was suddenly looking for me to chat about some miscellaneous stuffs, that’s all.

MC: By the way, how did the omnipotent CEO Victor get in touch with this kind of private beach?

Victor’s eyes narrow slightly, carrying within them an unfathomable flavor.

Victor: Since I already am an omnipotent, shouldn’t it be easy to get in touch with a private beach?

Victor: Instead, how about we focus on a certain someone who’s hemming and hawing on a tangent to change the topic, much like she usually does when she messes up a proposal.

MC: No! Not at all!

Victor: You’re talking too fast.

MC: ....

Victor: In an unprecedented manner, you’ve stuffed a laptop, two film-related reference materials in the luggage, and even brought a notebook....

Victor: Tell me, is there any work left to be done?

....he really hits the nail on the head far too accurately.

I pout, dawdle to Victor’s side and start breaking my fingers as I count.

MC: I’ve indeed completed all the tasks. Next month’s proposal, the income and expenditure statements, and the stockholder’s opinion.... I’ve reported them all to you before we set off.

MC: As for bringing the materials....

MC: It’s because I’ve got some unformed theme ideas for a film. I was planning to gather inspiration during the trip, and then sort them out after we get back~

Victor: Owh? You’ve become this diligent now?

MC: Aren’t you happy that I’ve become diligent?

Victor ticks the corners of his lips slightly upward as he props up his upper body, tucking his thumb into my clenched fist.

His dry finger pad brushes slowly over the lines of my palm, as if to smooth something out for me.

Victor: If a certain dummy became a little more forthright, I’d be even happier.

MC: Really? Then I’m gonna be frank with stating my demands––

MC: After we finish unpacking, let’s go surfing first. Then we’ll go swimming and sunbathing. I heard that there are whale-watching boats and glass boats available in this Platinum Sea....

MC: Finally, let’s go for a super sumptuous seafood feast!

Victor: ....

Victor pinches my palm, not too gently but not too strongly either. I don’t know if it’s because I was going off a tangent to change the topic, and he feels helpless as a result.

Victor: Other demands can be satisfied, but sea crabs are off the table.

–

[Tidbits]: In case you don’t know, there’s a call named “Sympathy for Allergy”, which accompanies Victor’s “Discovery Date” – MC gets allergy from eating crabs, though she didn’t know she had crab allergy~ :>

[T/N]: Damn THESE WRITERS! This call was almost 3.5+ years ago! ('-'*ゞ

–

He stands up and puts the empty luggage in the hotel cabinet. Gazing at his tall and straight back, my fingers slowly curl up again.

He specially completed his work in advance so that he could accompany me on vacation. I don’t want to disappoint him.

After all, currently I’ve absolutely no idea how to choose an outline for this kind of thing. I might as well take rest first. I can write it after we get back from the vacation....

Right, there’s still time to do it perfectly.

I read this to myself over and over again in my heart as I walk towards Victor.

—

┈┈ ◍♡◍ ┈┈┈ ◍♡◍ ┈┈

—

✧ [SECTION 3] ✧

[T/N]: If you can, I’ll very, very, VERY highly recommend following with the video for this section; especially the hotel scene. HIS VOICE AJSJSFVSHDJSD 🥺🥺🥺

—

The early morning sea breeze still carries the slight chillness of the night, a few rays of the first sunlight flowing out from the seams between the heavy layers of clouds.

The small whale-watching boat sails along the wave currents towards the deep sea arena, reminiscent of a white foam swimming in the turquoise blue waves.

Surfing in the shallow sea on the first day, and sunbathing at the beach on the second day were both completed successfully without a hitch. So, I hope today’s plan to look for whales in the deep sea arena will be a success too. .

Everything about this holiday is incomparably wonderful, except for the wordless and uncommunicative gradually looming deadline—— 12 days to go.

I inhale a deep breath, the fresh air carrying with it a slightly salty flavor. Deliberately not letting myself think about that day, I turn my head and support myself on the railing of the boat, my eyes nervously roving over the sea level.

MC: Can you see it.... VICTOR, IS THAT A WHALE?

Victor: Those are the wings of a seagull.

MC: WHAT ABOUT THAT ONE IN THE DISTANCE! ISN’T THAT A WHALE!

Victor: That’s the reef.

MC: ....

Victor looks at me, releasing stifled laughter twice. Then, he takes me by the shoulder and turns me in the other direction.

Victor: [laughs softly]  Look over there.

MC: But there’s nothing there.... WOW!!

Before I can finish speaking, I feel a raging current crashing into the whale-watching boat, immediately followed by a colossus of a creature leaping out of the sea level.

It flips in a graceful radian over the sea surface, and then swirls into the water again.

The splashing water droplets are reminiscent of rain pouring in mid-air. The resplendent morning sun penetrates through the water mist, circling a hazy rainbow over the sea.

It’s a sight that lasts only for a few brief seconds, but it’s enough to be etched deeply into one’s heart.

—

I still can’t stop thinking about the scene I saw in the morning until we return to the hotel in the evening.

MC: Ah! It was really too spectacular. The only shame is that it lasted such a short time, I didn’t even have enough time to fish out my phone and take photos....

MC: I heard the crew members say that we were very lucky, as some whale-watching boats stay for several good hours and may not even get to see the whales~

MC: By the way, Victor, how did you know at the time that there would be whales there?

Victor: Half observation and half intuition. The boat had been inclining slightly in the opposite direction, suggesting that something huge must be affecting the flow of waves not too far away.

MC: I see.... hey, your phone seems to be ringing?

Victor grunts a “hmm”, takes his phone and says a few words in a low voice. Then, he looks up at me.

Victor: There are some matters at LFG that need to be handled. I’m gonna have to borrow your computer to send an e-mail.

MC: Sure, just take it.

Unconcerned, I turn around and head towards the bathroom to remove my makeup. Just as I finish washing my face, I don’t even get the opportunity to wipe it dry when Victor’s voice suddenly rings out from outside the door——

Victor: MC.

Victor: Did seeing a whale today make you think of any new theme?

This sentence emerges from nowhere. Perplexed, I poke my head out of the doorway and am met with his serene eyes.

MC: What theme....

Victor: The subject selection for Stanley Anderson’s film.

He turns around the computer as he speaks. And there on the screen is my e-mail interface.

It’s only now does it dawn on me that my account was not logged out and that Victor would see this rejected email as soon as he clicked on the interface.

And given how bright the “omnipotent” CEO Victor is, I’m afraid he’s already thoroughly understood the reason for all my prevarications over the past few days.

Victor: Why didn’t you tell me?

MC: I.... I didn’t tell you because I thought I’d still be able to come up with something in time.

MC: As you can see too, this rejection e-mail is only temporary, and there are still more than ten days to go before the genuine deadline.

The more I talk, the more anxious I become. I can’t help walking up to him in quick steps.

MC: I’m really thinking about new theme ideas, and I’ve gathered inspiration too. I....

Victor: [gentlest of the gentlest tones to ever exist^∞]  I wish you could become a little more frank. [sighs extremely softly]  Dummy.

All of my incoherent explanations are entirely blocked up by these words from Victor.

His voice seems to posses an extraordinary magic. In a split second, compared with being pierced with panic and restlessness, the desire of wanting to break the embankment of my vulnerability to him grows stronger instead.

MC: I....

I throw myself into his arms. The tip of my nose rests on his shoulder, and the undried water patches on my cheeks brush against his shirt.

MC: ....I can’t think of anything, Victor.

MC: I wasn’t being lazy, I didn’t want to procrastinate, I thought I could figure out....

MC: There are only 12 days left. The more I think about the time, the more my mind goes blank, and the less and less courage I have to open the document....

The tip of my nose is incredibly sour from the repeated entanglement of the past few days, and every word carries a bitter taste of grievance.

MC: I’ve been preparing for a long time for a theme idea and it didn’t even come through. Would something I think up at the last moment really be any better than before?

MC: With so many people in the world competing for this course, how can I be sure that I will be one of the luckiest ones?

MC: And then there’s....

Victor: What else?

—— I didn’t want to tell you about my failure during the holidays; what I wanted to share with you was my good news.

I’m unable to say anything. I can only shake my head vigorously, and hug him a little more tightly.

Amid the silence, Victor’s kiss lands softly on my forehead, allowing me to release all my anxieties in his arms.

Victor: Asked the dummy to be a little frank, now that was too frank again.

His hand combs through my hair, and cups my cheek.

Victor: I told you, you don’t need to suppress your emotions in front of me. You can be not strong and you can not do well.

MC: You did  say that....

—

[Tidbits]: They’re both referring to Rainy-day Date, where MC had a very similar meltdown~ :>

—

Victor: What happens if you don’t pass this time? Is there still another opportunity in the future?

MC: That will have to wait until two years from now....

Victor: So there’s still another opportunity in two year’s time, right?

I rub my wet jaw against his palm and slowly nod.

Looking at me like this, Victor raises his eyebrows and speaks in a feigned serious manner.

Victor: Judging by the current perspective, [MC’s Company Name]’s operations aren’t likely to have any major problems in two year’s time;

Victor: LFG’s scale is also expanding at a steady pace, and we can always be the backbone of [MC’s Company Name];

Victor: You will also have more experience and first-hand knowledge, and will be able to come up with better theme ideas;

Victor: As for the old director, I’ve the impression that he also participated in the amateur equestrian competition this year. Unless....

MC: ....no unless, the old man is in quite good health!

I subconsciously make this snide remark. And as soon as the words are out of my mouth, the boulder that has been originally weighing down on my chest seems to disappear in an instant.

The corners of Victor’s lips also lift in response, his knuckles scraping across my cheek.

Victor: So, the consequences of failure are not as terrible as you might think.

Victor: Or do you think Stanley Anderson is scarier than that “evil capitalist” Victor back then?

MC: Pfffttt....

I finally giggle and raise my head at him.

MC: In comparison, you were scarier back then.

—

✧ [SECTION 4] ✧

—

Early the next morning, I’m already sitting upright at the desk, with my computer and notes open in front of me.

MC: Since I’ve already confessed to Victor, there’s no point in procrastinating. I must get something written today!

MC: The direction of collecting the materials should be a little lifelike.... but too much life isn’t eye-catching enough, is it....

MC: An accident in your life? Superpower intervention to shatter the serenity?

MC: But is there a bit too much of such genre.... It feels like not just movie and TV productions but also games like to write in this direction now.... AHH!

As I’m racking my brain, the ends of my hair are suddenly lifted. The slight tickling sensation gives me a start, and I turn my head and see Victor.

MC: What are you doing! I’m working hard!

Victor: I’ve been staring at you for twenty minutes, and the amount of time you’ve spent tapping away at the keyboard wouldn’t count to no more than thirty seconds.

Victor: Working hard?

MC: ....

MC: Cough, weren’t I pondering conscientiously....

Victor: Get changed.

MC: Eh?

Victor smiles. His long, slender finger, which has been twirling around the ends of my hair, follows the strands upwards, tapping my head gently with his knuckles.

Victor: If your conscientious pondering is being bored in the room and being lost in thoughts, then why not come out in the sun with me?

Victor: The holidays aren’t over yet, are they?

—

I originally thought that Victor would take me to the beach to relieve boredom and then go back, but to my surprise, he brings me to the small pier.

Looking at the boat in front of me, my eyes widen in astonishment.

MC: This is.... a glass boat?

The almost transparent boat floats on the sea surface. As your line of sight passes through the hull, you can even see the fine white sandstones and swimming seaweeds underwater.

Victor nods, extending his hand to me.

Victor: If you want to be in a daze, just be in a daze here.

Snow-white seagulls sweep overhead as the nimble boat floats on the sea waves.

The crystal clear seawater ripples from beneath the boat. The bright and beautiful sunlight maps the shimmering waves in a crystalline resplendence – reminiscent of beads of silver sown on the surface of the sea.

At first, I was being too cautious and didn’t dare to move. But now I wish, if only I had eight eyes, I could take in the scenery up and down, left and right, all at the same time.

MC: No wonder this private beach is called the “Platinum Sea”.... so dazzling.

I turn my head to look at Victor, and my gaze just so happens to crash right into his eyes behind his sunglasses.

MC: ....cli-ick.

Victor: [laughs softly]  What are you clicking?

MC: Clicking the moment here right now, Victor really  is too handsome. I couldn’t resist taking a picture of him with my eyes!

With that said, I half rise out of my seat and throw myself into his arms.

The gentle waves surround us, combining with the steam whistle of a ship and soft chirping of gulls in the distance. And the closest sound that can be heard is the overlapping heartbeats of the two of us.

MC: Are we just gonna bask in the sun like this?

Victor: What else?

MC: I’m just a little surprised. I originally thought you were gonna supervise and urge me to stop wasting time, but I didn’t expect you to waste time with me....

Victor: According to the state you’re in right now, it won’t make any difference whether it’s eleven days or one day from the deadline.

Victor: The change should lie in the MC with a direction of collecting the materials and the MC without a direction of collecting the materials.

MC: Pffttt.... yes!

MC: So would you like to hear my thoughts during this time?

Victor: I’m all ears.

I start from that theme idea that didn’t pass. Then, I tell him about my preparation, my train of thoughts, my references....

The tiny glass boat is reminiscent of an isolated island in the sea, and Victor is the only one who knows about all my failures and setbacks.

MC: By the way, have you seen any movie of Stanley Anderson?

Victor: I’ve seen the famous ones. My favorite is “The Underwater Tangerine”.

—

[T/N]: I’m not exactly sure how to translate the name of this movie «水中橘子» cause it’s not a real movie LOL. Another completely different translation of this due to multiple meanings of “水” would be “Orange Drink”/“Tangerine Beverage”~ 🤣 But I decided on “The Underwater Tangerine ” because of what Victor says~ ｡◕‿‿◕｡

—

MC: I like it too! What a big brain, and the language of the camera lens was particularly brilliant!

Victor: What I actually liked was the dark humor in it, fantasy with a dash of reality.

MC: Speaking of which.... before I thought that the themes of Stanley Anderson’s films are all fantasy related stuffs, so I wanted to adapt to his taste....

MC: But now, does this not seem to be working anymore?

MC: Should I still play to my strong points, and write something more realistic for the theme?

MC: In fact, that’s what’s worrying me now. I feel like that student who can’t figure out the pulse of the teacher who’s setting up the question....

Victor: Since you can’t figure it out, why don’t you present “yourself” well?

MC: Present myself.... what do you mean?

Victor: I remember when you sent in your show proposal last year, you attached a brainstorming idea about a short film – “A grandmother looking for space aliens”. It was pretty good.

MC: That was just something I wrote randomly....

MC: And I remember you calling me immediately back then! The annotation you made was, “Pay attention to the cost”!

Victor: From an investor’s point of view, there is a risk of profit in your material. But purely in terms of a movie script, it is quite interesting.

MC: Humph, it’s too late to compliment me now!

I grunt indignantly, but my heart swells with jubilation at this belated affirmation from Victor.

MC: Victor.

Victor: Hmm?

MC: Why are you always so calm and rational? Aren’t there times when you can’t think of a solution and procrastinate on work?

Victor: I’m no god. Of course I have those moments.

MC: Really? And how do you resolve such circumstances?

Victor: Before, I used to cook. The process of cooking the ingredients was like sorting out the situations at work, and I felt a little at ease when it was done.

Victor: Later.... I found an even better method.

MC: What’s that?

Victor: Giving you a call.

MC: How come I didn’t know that.... when did you call me to talk about this matter?

Victor: [softest of the softest voices ever] ....dummy.

As his hand caresses over the nape of my neck, he gives it a pinch helplessly.

Victor: How do I let you know....

Victor: Just by hearing your voice chattering continuously on the other end about some trivial matters, I feel that none of those problems really seem to be problems anymore.

MC: Just like as we’re right now?

MC: As I’m talking to you now.... my childish thoughts, my ill-formed fantasies, is telling you about them going to make you happy?

Victor lowers his head to lock eyes with me, the lights stirring within his deep eyes are full of tolerance.

Victor: Exactly as we’re right now.

The gradually warming sun shines on my skin, making it slightly hot. Yet, what bestows me with strength even more than the photosynthesis is his determined and deep voice.

I blink. Then, I wrap my arms around Victor’s neck and give him a kiss on the cheek.

MC: Let’s go back. This time, I truly have an inspiration.

—

–°–•–°–•–°–•–°–

📞• Call and Moments: Here! 

[T/N]: Listening to the call is very important btw! :>

—

┈┈ ◍♡◍ ┈┈┈ ◍♡◍ ┈┈

[hush-writes-preg]

As the months fly by my visits become more and more frequent. Sometimes we don’t even make love, I just talk about my cravings and how the babies are doing. You find out my name is Alex and I’m carrying your twins, and more so, that I’ve been developing a strong crush on you. By my due date, I’m more waiting for you than I am seeking you out. I’m so heavy, I can barely walk half the time, but I still make my way to your train as often as I can.

Even though I’m about to pop, will you still have me?

-🚂

My apologies for the delay, Train Anon!  Life got a little crazy there for a while, but I wanted to be able to give this the attention it deserves. ❤️❤️❤️ So here you are! 

(Previous asks in this series: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3)

I've never regretted working on long-distance trains, for I haven't really been interested in settling in one place for long when I could be reveling in the freedom of travelling wherever the rails might take me instead.  I lived for my job, for the casual relationships, for no one but myself, honestly.  And for years, that was good enough for me.

But I was starting to wonder if that was enough. 

I guess I had you to blame for that, Alex.  I'd never planned on being a father, but that hadn't stopped me from fucking you bareback more time than I could count, until the day you showed up with a faint baby bump and an unspoken question.  Would I continue our liaison, or would I switch lines and leave you behind as nothing more than a pleasant memory? 

I hadn't answered when we parted ways yet again, but I think the sight of me waiting for you in the dining car a few weeks later was all the answer you needed.  

We still found plenty of excuses to make love during your visits, but we found a surprising amount of time to talk, too.  I learned so much more about you than I ever expected, and you even shared details about your pregnancy with me.  You told me about your odd cravings and your ultrasounds as you curled up against my side during late evenings spent in your cabin, and I couldn't help but feel like there's something more going on.  That your feelings for me were changing, but instead of being spooked by the thought, I found myself… strangely content.

When you showed me the first sonogram of our twins (!), I was left speechless.  We made those two little beans on the photo, and they were growing larger and larger inside of you every day.  In some ways it didn't seem real.  What were we going to do about them once they came?  What would we do about whatever-this-was between us?

But you didn't ask those questions, so I didn't try to answer.

With your due date on the horizon, I almost expected you to disappear again, but you still managed to show up with your fetching waddle and enormous belly.  I was reminded of the first night we met-- the way your eyes had glanced over me with barely-concealed heat, and the way your clothing had clung to curves exaggerated by your advanced pregnancy.  So shy yet so needy, but still eager to be touched and pleasured.  After helping you take your bag to your cabin, I asked you if there was anything else I could help you with.

You smiled and nodded, your fingers tentatively moving towards the buttons on the shirt straining to contain your pregnant belly, at least until I pushed them away and took over.  I wanted to unwrap you myself.

So unwrap you I did, easing you out of your clothes and helping to settle you back on the bed with much more care than we usually took.  My mouth kissed a path along the dome of your abdomen while my hands caressed and stroked, moving lower, lower, lower, until finally I could close my lips around your arousal while my fingers nudged inside.  You tasted like heaven, the sounds you made sounded like music, though sadly your bulging middle kept me from seeing your face.  But I didn't mind as long as I could feel you tremble and jerk against me, until I finally sent you soaring over the edge with a clever twist of my fingers and flick of my tongue. 

When I eventually arose from between your orgasm-limp thighs, licking the flavor of you from the corners of my mouth, I realized how absolutely shattered you looked.  Like you couldn't believe that I'd want you like that, especially then, when you so close to giving birth. 

But the sight of you nude and spread across the bed with our babies shifting within your womb was the closest thing to divinity that I figured I'd ever see, and I wanted to worship at your altar. 

So worship you I did well into the night, losing myself in the wonder of your body as I showered you with attention and praise.  I lost count of the number of times I felt you fall apart in my arms as the train gently rocked us.  And the memory of you clenching around me as I spooned you and entered you from behind that last time felt like it would be forever engraved on my soul.

It's getting harder and harder to let you walk away from me, Alex.  But I'll keep working on this line, so if you ever decide to return, know that I'll be here, ready to do my best to take care of all your needs.

[famej]

Whose Costume’s the best, Rurin?

Leviathan x Reader

« Mirror , mirror, tell me who’s going to make Levi happy tonight, rurin ? »

You turned on yourself, holding your wig and hat to prevent them from falling.

When you came to face the mirror again, you pointed at your reflection and winked.

« Yes, it’s me, rurin! »  you sing sang, half giggling at your own silliness.

But wasn’t it the whole goal of Halloween?

The cosplay in itself hasn’t been that hard to make, thanks to Asmo who volunteered to help you. Not that Levi wouldn’t like to do so but surprising him was your ultimate goal of this year’s holiday.

It was surprising that you haven’t thought about dressing up as Ruri-chan before but hey! It takes time to elaborate a surprise in order to make your beloved demon happy.

And to perfect your attire, you’d brought an Azuki-Tan backpack, the detail, which makes the difference.

On that note, you glanced one last time into your mirror and smiled, content and excited.

« Yosh! Let’s go Rurin! »

While leaving your bedroom, you kept wondering what kind of costume Levi would be wearing and what would be his reaction.

Just imagining his adorable face, all red while he tried to hide it from you but being all excited to see his beloved Ruri-chan at the same time…

You could already feel your heart melt.

After reaching Levi’s bedroom, you checked one last time if everything was in its designated place  then knocked on the door, calling out :

« Levia-chan, it’s me! Do you mind if I come in, rurin? »

You refrained a giggle at your little imitation and listened carefully to what was going on on the other side of the door, which clearly sounded like hurried footsteps coming toward you.

A few seconds later, the door bursted open, revealing the avatar of envy; wearing an adorable goldfish onesie.

Speaking about fishes, his eyes almost bulged out of their sockets

« Aw Levi, you’re so cute dressed like that Can I take a picture, rurin? »

For a long moment, he didn’t move an inch, nor displayed any kind of reaction. You were seriously starting to worry.

« Levi? »

You waved your hand in front of his face to try and provoke a reaction.

And after a few additional instants of stillness, a thread of blood poured out of one of his nostrils, down to his chin.

With widen eyes, you cupped his face, inspecting him worriedly before you looked around the room for something to wipe his nose.

The moment your eyes fell upon a tissue box, you were about to reach for it when Levi seemed to retrieve his senses and grabbed his forearm to prevent you from moving.

You turned back to him with a questioning look, finding your demon in his flustered mode, face completely red, eyes trying to focus anywhere but on you.

“I just want to wipe your nose” you said, using your other hand to take a tissue and start to dab at the blood.

Now that his face had recover his original state, the shyness still showing.

“How about we go down to the living room to grab something to eat, it will surely make you feel better?”

Again, Levi’s hand pulled you back toward him.

“Can we…stay there? Please…”

You glanced at the open door briefly.

“But…The party, you were so eager to show off”

Leviathan, still holding your arms, walked around you to push the door close again.

And for the first time since the last few minutes, Levi’s orange eyes found yours, showing no more signs of shyness.

“I want to stay with you, only…I don’t want the others to see you dressed like that.”

It was now your turn to blush under the weight of his words.

His hand slid from your wrist to intertwine with your own.

“You’re mine” he stated, eyes never wavering but blush clearly betraying how affected his was by his own sayings.

“Yes I’m yours, Levia-chan, rurin”

Levi blinked and another round of blood poured out of his nose. The next second, you felt his hold on your hand loosen before he collapsed right on the spot.

[reversemoon255]

MGEX ZGMF-X20A Strike Freedom Gundam

So I started working on this guy at the end of November. I didn’t finish it until December 31st. I ended up doing a daily art challenge over on the bird, and that ended up taking up almost all my free time considering my work hours double during December. However, I’m glad I finished it before the year rolled over.

The Good: This was a fantastic build. The interior frame was a ton of fun to build, there are a bunch of small mechanisms, interesting parts layering; just a stellar experience all around.

To aid in the build process, it actually came with a small, cardboard “Multi Stand” to hold your in-use sprews. I ended up using it for all the plated and painted sprews.

Speaking of the painted and plated, the number of interesting materials was very cool, and something you don’t get to see if you stick to just HG or standard MG builds. The stickers were metallic foil, there were raised metal stickers as well, there were a full four sprews that were either fully painted or chrome plated in gold. It was honestly one of the things that drew me to this kit.

The layout of the runners was also very well done. With a few small exceptions, almost every part was either undergated or gated into a place that would be covered later by other parts. I had to quickly become very adept at shaving parts with a knife rather than a file.

I was a little bummed that I had to cover up all that gold with armor, and found myself wishing the armor parts were clear so I could see it all better, but after it was finished I was impressed by just how much gold showed through. While I still think I’d prefer clear armor, I’m not upset with what we got. Oh, and it comes with a tiny Lacus and Kira. I don’t care, but maybe you will.

The Bad: I only really have three issues with this kit. The first is the bits: the bits are not designed to be displayed. They have no way of accepting any type of stand adapter to hold them up, and the kit itself has no added display piece for them.

Second is the articulate hands. They’re actually very well articulated (I managed to get a very good snapping pose out of them), but the fingers pop off all the time. All the time. It’s a bummer, since they’re required to use the Beam Sabers.

Lastly are the metallic raised stickers. They just don’t stick well, and if you flex them at all they may stick worse. You also don’t really need most of them, since the armor covers a lot of them up. You just need the chest ones, which get held in place by the vents, and about 3 on each knee. I didn’t end up needing to add glue, but you might.

The Details: Because of how this kit is meant to be built, I only added panel lining. I specifically avoided lining the gold plastic because I’ve had issues with gold plastic degrading over time when ink is added. I did add it to a few tiny “hole” spots, like the head vulcans, but that’s it. I did use all the included standard stickers, though didn’t use the decal stickers they included. I find they can make a kit look too cluttered or marred, and they tend to peel or fall off more easily than normal stickers. I’ve found I prefer building kits without them unless there’s a standout interesting design.

Overall, even though it took me forever to build (which it shouldn’t have), it was probably the coolest build I did in 2022, and a great way to cap it off. It is a very expensive kit, but I do think it’s worth it if you can swing it. It’s an amazing build, a fantastic final product, and is meant to be straight built if that concerns you.

BTW, Fun Fact, I’ve brought up that I play Gundam Breakers Mobile a few times. Strike Freedom is the most common non-custom build to run into. Like, you’re more likely to run into one than a painted custom. Guess it’s popular.