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sunoopsis · 8 months

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meow :3

6) macy's - written (1.1k)

warnings! : mention of suicide (jokingly), unnecessary yapping by me im sorry

Woken up by your alarm, your day was forced to start… You had to get out of the house by 9:15, any later and you’d be late. You sat on your bed, trying to regain your consciousness. Last night, you went to bed overjoyed from your small, but meaningful conversation with Jaemin. Fun fact, you tend to overthink in the morning. Sometimes, its a blessing, other times a curse. Your topic of overthinking this morning was Yizhuo’s message. Something about best friends, romance and Jisung not having the right to comment on it. What did it mean? Maybe it doesn’t concern you.. Oh, but what if it did?? Maybe you shouldn’t think so hard about something so unnecessary. No, seriously! You wasted 15 minutes thinking about this! That's, like, 5 more minutes than you normally waste! Before you can think about the topic again, you get up and wash your face, do your skincare, normal morning stuff. Now, you have very few tasks left, doing good!

You went back to your room and packed your bag. You packed your uniform instead of wearing it. Normally, back in middle school, you always wore tights and a shirt under your uniform, so you were super-protected. But, wow.. The high school uniforms were just TOO pretty to ruin by wearing something underneath. Last week, your team had a half-practice, which was just to set the basics for the team and get to know each other. And last week, you just wore your uniform as is, just with short-tights. You realized that it was actually pretty uncomfortable, soo… nevermind! You decided you’d just change when you got there. Because of this decision, you just wore a short-sleeve and sweatpants and headed to the kitchen.

You shot your team’s groupchat a text asking them their coffee preferences then treated yourself to some cereal. By the time you were done eating and brushing your teeth, everyone’s orders were transferred to your notes app. Finally, you put on your rollerblades and headed out. Since you lived quite close to the school, you and your brother skated to school and just kept a pair of shoes in your lockers (skating to school? wtf is this, cardcaptor sakura??). You took a little detour to the nearest cafe and ordered everyone’s coffees. Clutching the bags of coffee, you continued your way to school. Some people’s orders, you had already memorised from earlier years. Like Yizhuo’s(duh), and the captain, Minjeong’s.

Your team had 2 consistent captains. It was either Minjeong, or it was you. Whichever one of you guys was the senior, that is. You had a lot of respect for Minjeong, she’s very passionate and hardworking, she’s also a very dependable leader, she’s always been like that, for at least 4 years. You felt quite thankful for the Koreans in your school. Jisung, Minjeong, Jaemin…the list goes on. You’re thankful, because its not usual for Koreans to attend an international school. Ugh, are you really overthinking again?! Well, I can’t say I’m exactly against it, check the clock! Its 9:15! Can you believe it? Normally, you’d barely be out of the house by now, I’m proud of you! I’d love to explain the rest of your day in detail but.. Saturday wasn't actually supposed to be this long.. Because this chapter is about sunday… sorry.

Good morning! You slept half an hour more than yesterday, impressive how you limit yourself, I’m jealous! Mark’s friends will arrive around 10 am. That means here's an hour until you get to see Jaemin again~ but it also means an hour until you have to work on your project… Its fine! You're quite prepared. You have all the supplies ready, plus 5 seniors to help you! (actually 4, but unfortunately you had no idea donghyuck wasn’t coming. but its fine cuz his help probably would’ve been useless.) You went on with your normal routine, wore something cute (not too cute cuz then you’d be overdressed), and went downstairs. You were greeted by your brother and annoying news.

“Good morning, (n/n)! Bring whatever you have prepared for the project here, its better for you two to work here.”

how unnecessary…

“What? why?” you were obviously confused, as you had no knowledge of this beforehand?

“Because then, Chenle doesn’t get left out, plus you get to see Jisung, yeah?”

(translation : I’m gonna keep an eye on the both of you and don’t forget Jisung is here so you don’t focus on Chenle too much)

You hesitantly threw him a thumbs up and went to get the stuff. Sometimes, you’d wonder… why the hell was your brother this overprotective?! Did he want to be the only popular-with-the-opposite-gender Lee? Or does he have some really confusing but genuinely good intentions? Yeah that mystery’s got a lot of time until its solved…

You waited patiently, occasionally gossipping with Mark to pass time. Time passed, and passed… And everyone slowly started arriving. Jisung came first, who you ended up spending time with until the second guest, Chenle arrived. Obviously, after Chenle arrived, you two were redirected to the table, And you started working. Both of you were so invested in your work that you didn’t even notice the others coming in at first. Time went by as you worked your hardest. Did you argue a lot? yes. Did you ask Mark and Renjun for help like a million times? yes. But did you get half of the project done in 3,5 hours? oh absolutely. You were impressed with yourself. Normally, if you were paired with Yizhuo (like you constantly have been for the past 9 years, with some exceptions), you barely would’ve gotten anything done. Considering that, maybe Chenle wasn’t so bad, after all.

You excused yourself around 15 minutes before 2pm, barely before they had left. You dressed nicely, of course! You were meeting up with your best friend, and there was a 90% chance of jaemin seeing you… When you went down to get out, they’d left, just as you’d planned. You dressed in a casual, but fashionable style. Simple tank top with a design and a tennis skirt. Normally, Mark isn’t quite fond of you wearing tennis skirts in crowded places, since he’s afraid of others thinking its a regular miniskirt, but you were just feeling like taking risks today :3c

You arrived at the mall around 2:10 pm, all that was left was to wait for Yizhuo to arrive. Your plan was pretty simple. Treat yourself and Yizhuo to (a very late) lunch, and then look around to find and surprise your brother. Well, you… only managed to get half of the plan done.

because your brother was at macys and you fucking despised macys and would rather kill yourself than enter one ever again.

jeno is a vulgar lottle man plz forgive me im writing these half awake

no bc truly what were mark and chenle doing in macys😭😭

masterlist

not really a taglist but taglist: @thisisnotjacinta

#chenle smau #nct dream smau #nct smau #nct dream #zhong chenle #absolutely despise macys im sorry

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0ldzia · 10 days

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Venting because that’s the only thing that helps me.

TW: euthanasia, pet loss, cancer, sad stuff in general

As I put my hand on your chest, feeling your heart when it was giving me your last heartbeats I felt the price of love being torn away from my heart.

(800 words)

———————————————————————

Backstory: my dog was diagnosed back in January with cancer, the tumor was located near his bladder and it was not possible to operate (99% that he would bleed out) and even though it all started few earlier, it was terminal and without any chance of remission, recovery or any of that stuff. I saw him shake once, got concerned and went to vet the next day but it was already too late and there were no earlier symptoms at all. It’s so frustrating because we lost before even starting. We decided to start chemo in pills which is the softer version to stop the tumor growth and make his life a bit longer, and it did. It gave him 9 more months of quality, painless, happy life. He was only 7 years old, it was my first dog that I dreamed of my whole life, I saw him at the animal shelter and he was at our house not even a week later. Sparky was so inteligent, a bit sassy, smart, loving, calm, such a distinct and expressive personality, I wasn’t even aware that was possible for an animal. I never experienced love for a living creature like this, once in a lifetime bond. My family spent all their and thousands and thousands to give him the best care thought his life in general but especially in his last months of life. As everyone expected the time had come and we had to euthanize him when he got worse because nobody wanted him to suffer. He got worse two weeks ago, everyone did all they can but the meds and treatments were not working anymore. On Saturday he visibly lost all his will to live and was done fighting (which i couldn’t never be mad at him for, he was so brave for so long, my perfect angel, the tumor was his only ever flaw) There is an infinite amount of things I can say about him, my feelings and this situation but I will limit myself to this.

I willI will share my conversation (or rather a monologue I had with my friend about this).

My friend: Buff... how hard, I couldn't [put an animal down] do it, so you were brave

Me:

it was more my parents decision but i agreed to it

honestly when i saw in what stage my dog was that day

i was thinking about this situation months ahead and i always thought

i could never agree to it

but when i saw him

how weak and sick he was

there was not a doubt in my mind

i hope you will never be in a situation like this

when you see your pet like this

and the look they give you

when they look deeply in your eyes like saying: I love you, now it’s my time.

(i am crying typing this btw)

i made that decision with a (of course) veeeeery heavy heart

but you do [make that decision]

and i repeat i wish you that NEVER happes to you

but i can guarantee you if you were in my position you could and would 100% do it

and everyone (except some psychos) would

he was not eating by himself for days (forced feeding) taking sooo many meds

had the energy to move but not the will

stopped cleaning himself

my dad was wiping his private parts with wipes

[Sparky] literally was so done with life he pissed himself inside the house

having IV daily for hours

heavy breathing, heart pounding faster than normal, having slight shakes despite being on a lot of medication

when it was already decided and my dad went to get the vet to come to our house

two hours before procedure

i was sitting with him in my garden

when i basically carried him in

his head on my lap

and he just gave my that eye to eye look

“i love you, it’s my time to go”

this shit is the hardest, most painful and saddest thing that ever happened to me

and i will never go a day in my life without thinking about him

his paw print forever tattooed on my body

i feel like the saddnes is rotting my body and my mind away

I will love you and cherish forever our time together my perfect boy ❤️‍🩹. Even though I’m not religious, everyday I am one step closer to meeting you again and that keeps me a going a little bit more. As I put my hand on your chest, feeling your heart when it was giving me your last heartbeats I felt the price of love being torn away from my heart.

#venting #coping #cancer #pet loss #please end my suffering #just kill me at this point #almost #poetry #obviously mental problems #i have being vulnerable

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umichenginabroad · 30 days

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Week 14: Love Day <3

Čau everyone!

Tune in for a week of family-filled fun! That’s right, my mom, sister, and step-dad came to visit me this week. It’s our last full, so I’m happy to be spending it in Prague. And I’ve spent enough time here that I have a list of things I’m excited to show my visitors.

Fun fact of the blog: The 1st of May is actually Love Day! The Czech version of Labor day, after the end of the communist rule. According to legend, lovers are supposed to gather under a blossom tree and kiss for endless beauty throughout the year. There was a whole festival around Villa Gröbovka, our school building, that my sister and I stumbled upon when I was walking her through my daily routine. It was decorated so beautifully and pink. The vibes were super lively and girly, and we ended up staying for a bit receiving free chocolate, drinks, and even some lipstick!

Fam in Praha!

This week my mom, sister, and step dad came to visit! Just in time to help me pack up a majority of my stuff for home lol. I taught them the basics of Czech manners, such as greeting people upon entrance with a “dobrý den”. I also showed them my favorite spots in Prague, including Petřin, Vyšehrad, L’Osteria, Crème de la Crème, and the Saturday farmer’s markets. They shared my love for the city and found it to be beautiful, lively, and historic.

Finals Week

Balancing visitors and school is hard when literally all you want to do is revel in your last few moments in Prague, but duty calls. Tech Ethics was the worst, we had to prepare a group report that ended up being 22 pages as well as a 15 min presentation. Fortunately I got this done early in the week and didn’t need to think about it much longer. We had a couple assignments for our Leadership class including our “Pitch” presentation where we mock pitched IFSA to interested students. We also had to turn in our leadership development plan, something we should’ve been working on throughout the semester but I lacked all motivation to do so. Early next week we have our Challenge Project Presentation Panel which is our ‘capstone’ project equivalent. My group is almost finished with our presentation but I independently compiled a document of our recommendations for search engine optimization for their website so that they could actually implement our ideas after we leave. The project wasn’t too technical overall, it reminded me more of consulting, but we were expected to be experts on the topic and to do said research you needed to have a pretty strong understanding of how search engines work. Lastly, we had our database final exam which was cumulative, but open notes, so it wasn’t that bad. It felt good to be done with the bulk of my school work.

Now for some ins and outs.

Ins:

Peacocks! The Wallenstein Gardens have beautiful normal and white peacocks just walking around the garden. There are also bees (controlled), owls, and tons of fish in the ponds. Overall beautiful, a must see in the city.

Love Day: I just think Love day is a beautiful, inclusive concept we should bring over to the states :)

Outs:

Finals: To be honest, I’m sick of school by now and want to enjoy my time with my family and the last few days in Prague. However, the show must go on.

Thanks for checking in with my adventures in Prague! Sending love back home.

Na schle,

Reese Liebman

Computer Science and Engineering

Institute for Study Abroad (IFSA) CS Tech Career Accelerator in Prague, Czechia

#UmichEnginAbroad #IPEcsPrague #ReeseLiebman #IPEWinter24 #CzechRepublic

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girltomboy · 1 year

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Lately

I have been having such a hectic and beautiful time lately! My bf came to the city this weekend (well, he got his errands done on Friday, but we still spent the weekend together) and stayed with me while I worked from home on Friday, then we napped together and had sex, got high, went to visit our friend and his sister at their new apartment. I'm not totally crazy about it & about their new setup. My friend's room doesn't have any privacy because it's a living room, his sister has a more active life than him and is on the go a lot, he can't play video games while we watch anymore (that was a half joke) but he seems content so maybe a change wouldn't be so bad. His sister is pretty cute too. My bf thinks she is too loud but she's kind of a normal girl, I see through her and she is a sensitive and child-like soul- her Cancer moon shining through her Aqua sun in detriment. Anyway, we took a long walk on Friday and then we got home and watched our regular stuff. It was sooooooo nice to cuddle with him. I missed it and I miss him and I took so much time with him for granted last year. Saturday we stayed in, it was pretty gloomy outside but we managed to sneak a walk in the forest nearby towards the evening. Then we stopped at an outdoor gym and had some fun on the machines. Then we just chilled at home again. And on Sunday it was really overcast, cold, windy, the works. I wanted to go for another walk, but we wasted time until it was already evening and we had to make a trip to the train station so he can buy his ticket. And this morning we woke up together and he almost missed his train. 🙄 Thankfully he didn't, but he was really close. Hope this makes him more time-aware in the future, we even had a little argument before he got here, also time management-related. But anyway, what's important is that he got home safe.

Today I went to the office again, had fun with M- we make work bearable together. Afterwards we went out for dinner and drinks and chatted a lot. It's so nice to have a friend like her. I'm grateful for us and the friendship we nurtured in over a year. We laugh a lot and she's really sweet and honest, it's really the kind of friendship everyone genuinely needs. She's texting me cute stuff about our friendship right now, and how grateful she is that all we do is laugh our asses off at nothing while the weather gets grayer and darker everyday and the people get sadder. Also, we went to buy cigarettes and tried a small shop in the city center. The girl at the counter asked us if we were high school freshmen and we just exploded with laughter. She looked pretty young too, so we asked her back, and she was just 18 🥺 and apologized for the "confusion" lol sweet thing!! Anyway we had a really nice time tonight. I called my bf to say goodnight and my belly is really full but my heart is fuller. I'm alone in my apartment but I feel so loved and blessed that it makes me feel less lonely rn ❤️ Tomorrow is movie night with my work bestie, we are seeing The Exorcist 2, and I'm not excited about the movie because I've read horrible things about it - not even horror-wise, just lame. But I'm excited about the fun we're gonna have anyway

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maccasmccartney · 2 years

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Shameless post about Paul at Glastonbury and how great he is incoming!…

I want to start off by echoing what has been said by the vast majority of us who cannot believe the immense performance that Paul can do at his age. It has to be said because it just isn’t normally done, it feels almost superhuman, and to me, he is.

I was extremely lucky to be in the crowd on Saturday at Glastonbury, wishing I didn’t have a bladder and not being able to feel my legs after standing for 4 hours waiting for his set to start. But it’s Paul, and I would never pee again if it meant I could be at the front, waiting for him to perform.

I was right at the front and we were all jammed in together, literally couldn’t move. A small part of me was scared of the reception he would receive, because last time Paul’s voice was televised was the olympics/golden jubilee, and it was slated. But I was proved totally wrong when Paul started singing. His voice sounded stronger than it had been in a while, and the crowd were so warm and welcoming straight away, the words to ‘can’t buy me love’ just flowing from everyone’s lips as though they were engrained in their hearts. I knew then, the crowd was right there with him, and this would be a special night.

And this is a crowd of mixed ages but predominantly young people, who wouldn’t know some of the wings or solo stuff, but they were grooving right along with the rest of us, and that made me happy they were so respectful of Paul.

There was some surprises in the set list, ‘Juniors Farm’ being one of them that I freaked out when he started playing. One song I never expected to hear live was ’Spite of all the Danger’. At that moment I felt this was something monumental, the staggering history of these songs, Paul and The Beatles’ journey. It was a feeling that was part nostalgia, part keening loss of George and John and the passage of time.

It was also one of the most unexpectedly emotional of Paul’s gigs. When Paul played ’Here Today’ you could hear a pin drop as everyone drank every word Paul was singing, almost as though noise would severe the connection Paul was having with John at that moment. Same thing with ‘I got a feeling’ with John’s voice. When Paul said ‘“It’s like we’re back together again.”’ I was moved but also surprised at his emotional bluntness. Paul was never anyone to let his emotions show, but I can see that has changed now, which is lovely to see.

Let me tell you, I’ve never heard ’Get Back’ and ’Live and Let Die’ played to such an enthusiastic crowd, rocking out to ’Helter Skelter’ like they were at a heavy metal concert, this a song from nearly 50 years ago! It really makes the songs, and for nearly 3 hours, I could not keep the grin from my face.

I started my morning shift on Glastonbury farm after 3 hours sleep, a bounce in my step despite it being 5.30 in the morning. The sun was shining and everyone I spoke to that day were telling me how great Paul had been. I do feel like I’m protective of Paul, which is silly because his legacy is already cemented. But I feel a surge of pride regardless, his performance was a triumph, hailed as maybe the greatest performance ever. Perhaps it is because I feel he only ever deserves love, well he got it from me and thousands of others that night.

#paul mccartney #Glastonbury #the Beatles

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luci-in-trenchcoats · 3 years

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If I Fell For You (Part 3) - A Moment

Summary: Jensen is away from home for a few days but isn’t having the easiest time being away from the kids for the first time since the accident. When he returns home, he has a gala to attend on Saturday night but a kiss on the cheek and slip of the tongue will snowball into the reader and Jensen sharing a moment...

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x nanny!reader

Word Count: 6,100ish

Warnings: language, death of a spouse, death of a parent, anxiety, self-worth problems, referenced past harassment

A/N: I love this part so much for so many reasons. Please enjoy!

________

“Hi Jensen,” you asked Monday night when your phone rang. “How was your flight earlier?”

“Same old same old. I just got out of work,” he said with a yawn. “Gonna grab a bite out with a friend. Kids eat dinner okay?”

“We had honey sriracha glazed salmon with brussel sprouts and roasted red potatoes.”

“Really?”

“They had kraft mac and cheese and I had Taco Bell.”

“See this is why I like you,” he chuckled.

“I’ll try the salmon again tomorrow. I was gonna make it but they didn’t have any at the store,” you said, opening the fridge and taking out a pint of ice cream. “Hey can I have what’s left of this mint ice cream?”

“Sure. Pick some more up for me sometime before friday please,” he said. “Also, Taco Bell? You do realize we live in freaking Austin right. There are literally hundreds of places you can go that have better mexican food.”

“Yeah but fake cheese tastes good,” you said. He laughed and your stomach rumbled. “I so should have gotten more than two tacos.”

“You in the kitchen?” he asked. You hummed and you heard him let out an oof in the background.

“Yeah. You alright?”

“This bed in my hotel room is comfy,” he said. “But I was starting to say, go in the drawer at the end of the counter by the table. There’s only five hundred gajillion take out menus in there. Order a treat for yourself. It’s on me.”

“Jensen. I can get my own dinner.”

“True but you’re on call 24/7 until I get back.”

“Well in that case I bet you got a menu for a fancy steakhouse in here somewhere,” you teased as you picked up one for a tex mex looking restaurant. “Does this place really have quesadillas this big?”

“You must be looking at the menu on top. I almost ordered from there last week actually. The food’s great. They do delivery too. Just buzz the guy into the gate when they get there.”

“Any recommendations?” you asked, taking out the menu and flipping it over.

“Quesadillas are good. Loaded nachos are amazing. I’ve literally never had a bad thing from there,” he said. “To be honest I’d rather be getting that than where I’m going tonight.”

“Why’s that?” you asked, reading through your options, surprised to find such good prices.

“I have to wear a suit,” he said with a sigh. “After being poked and prodded all day I literally would rather just eat crap and watch food network.”

“How long have you known this friend of yours?” you asked.

“Twenty years, why?”

“Then you guys knew each other when you were young. It’s not too late out there. Call him, see if he’d rather get some crap food, a six pack and just catch up on his couch or in your room. I’m pretty sure he’s more looking forward to seeing an old friend again than the food,” you said.

“You make very good points. I should pay you more,” he said.

“You pay me plenty and barely let me spend a dime of my money on myself,” you said. “I don’t need more.”

“You got that fancy computer though.”

“You literally have the exact same mac in your office.”

“You moved in like three boxes and two computers,” he said.

“An ipad is not a computer,” you said.

“Debatable.”

“Well I like to draw sometimes and it’s easier on an ipad when you’re laying in bed,” you said.

“Are you any good?” he asked.

“No.”

“I bet they’re really good,” he said as you rolled your eyes. “I see you draw with the kids sometimes and those are good.”

“It’s a hobby is all,” you said, leaning back against the counter, your stomach grumbling again. “Anything else you want me to grab at the store? I’m going to hit it tomorrow while everyone’s at school.”

“Nah. Get the usual stuff,” he said. “The kiddos in bed?”

“Yeah, got the last one down about fifteen minutes ago,” you said. He hummed and you heard the sigh in it. “I got a video of them playing earlier I’ll send you.”

“Thanks. It’s my first night away from them in a long time. Normally I’m able to come back same day. I was kinda hoping they’d still be awake to say goodnight.”

“They’re safe and sound dad. We’ll call again after school tomorrow to talk like today,” you said.

“Yeah,” he breathed out. He was quiet and you pulled the phone away, taking a deep breath.

“You okay?”

“I haven’t been alone like this in a really long time.”

“I know. You check out your backpack yet?”

“No. Why?”

“You didn’t bring a jacket with you so I put that yellow hoodie that’s always on the hook in there in case you got cold.”

“That was Dee’s hoodie.”

“I was pretty sure it was,” you said. You heard him shuffle around briefly before he hummed, much happier that time. “I thought you might like to have a piece of...something-”

“I really don’t pay you enough,” he said quietly. “Thanks for putting this in there. I need something from home more than I realized.”

“Well put it on, call up your buddy and have some fun tonight, Ackles. Nanny’s orders.” He laughed and you felt that twinge in your stomach again, your eyes quickly closing.

“I will. Hey you mind if I call again tomorrow night? I don’t have any plans and sitting in a hotel room by myself isn’t very fun.” You smiled and felt heat in your cheeks, quickly thinking it away. He wanted company for a few minutes was all and you were friends. It was completely normal to talk with friends on the phone everyday.

“Of course. As long as you get a dinner in at some point that’s more than fine with me,” you said. “We can talk about The Bachelor!”

“Oh God no,” he groaned, chuckling after a few seconds. “I’ll settle for Grey’s Anatomy.”

“This Is Us?” you asked.

“Supernatural?”

“I haven’t watched that yet. I’m working up to it,” you said.

“Work faster woman. I only know legit everything about that one,” he chuckled. “But probably not a good idea to watch that one until I get back and you're not alone. First episode is kinda scary.”

“Oh well thanks for that,” you said, watching the clock tick by, knowing it had to be almost seven out there. “I’ll let you go. Have fun tonight Jensen.”

“I will Y/N. Promise.”

Friday Night

“Arrow,” you said after she’d flung her pasta bowl all over herself, covering her hair and face. She sniffled and you forced a smile. “Okay. How about a bath after dinner?”

Fifteen minutes later JJ and Zeppelin were in the movie room watching a cartoon while you had Arrow in the kids bathroom, scooping up some water over her head in the tub.

“Well hello ladies,” you heard behind you. You jumped and spun around, glaring for a moment before you recognized Jensen.

“Just me,” he said, backpack still on his shoulders.

“Daddy I got ziti all over my head,” she said.

“You did?” he asked, dropping his bag and taking off his jacket, kneeling down next to you. You got the last bit of sauce off and squirted some shampoo in her hair, Jensen watching you with a smile. “How was your day?”

She told him all about breakfast and daycare, playing with a few toy boats with him while you rinsed out the soap. You did a bit of conditioner before getting it out as well and putting the spray nozzle back.

“I got the rest if you wanna get the dryer ready?” he asked you, reaching for the soap. You swapped spots with him, Jensen washing her up while she kept talking about her day. By the time he was all done you had the dryer out and plugged in, Jensen picking her up and wrapping her up in a big bundle of towels before he set her on the counter. You went to work drying her hair, Jensen draining the tub and finding some pajamas for her.

“Do you want your hair up or down, sweetie?” you asked. She tried gathering it up and you grabbed her soft scrunchie perfectly fine for sleeping in from the counter. You put her hair up in a soft little bun, Jensen making an adorable sound when he returned.

“Aw, you look so cute, baby. I’ll be right there alright?” he said. She hopped off the counter and got dressed, rushing off downstairs when she was all done. “Survive the day?”

“Somehow we always do,” you said, gathering up the towels. “Kids are in the movie room.”

“Thanks. I’m gonna shower but we’re all good for the night,” he said. “Thanks for watching them this week.”

“You gotta go do your job,” you said. “You working on a movie or something? You never said.”

“Uh gonna be in a show called The Boys,” he said. “I’m gonna be one of the superheroes so I gotta go out and get my suit made all special for me every so often.”

“You’re gonna be a supe! That’s so fucking cool!” you said. He grinned and you blushed, shaking your head. “I’m so sorry. That was so not appropriate.”

“I don’t see any little ears around,” he chuckled. “You like the show then?”

“Yeah. It’s great. Like no other show consistently makes me go what the fuck did I just see. That’s so cool you get to be a supe though. Are you a one off or like a main character?”

“I’ll be very present in the next season. Gonna deal with the seven, all that,” he said. “I’m gonna be Solider Boy.”

“I can see that. You have that all American boy thing about you.”

“It’s my adorable face,” he teased.

“Well remember to not stay up too late. You have the gala tomorrow night remember?”

“Yes mom,” he said as you walked out. “Get the kids some takeout for dinner tomorrow and yourself.”

“Sounds good boss,” you said. “Night Jensen.”

“Goodnight, Y/N.”

The Next Night

You froze from where you were mixing up some brownie batter with JJ at the kitchen counter as Jensen popped downstairs. He was in a gorgeous black suit, a maroon pocket square and no tie going on, his hair scruffier looking than normal.

He started to laugh and you realized you were staring, your cheeks feeling hot as you went back to stirring.

“Mmm, you guys save me a brownie or two for when I get home?” he asked, leaning over and dipping his finger in the bowl of cream cheese frosting.

“We’ll spare one for dad,” you said, Jensen going back for seconds. “Ah, ah. No.”

He dipped his finger in and got another fingerful, kissing the top of JJ’s head and the twins at the counter.

“Be good for Y/N guys!” he called as he rushed out.

You whistled and he jogged back, catching you holding up his phone from the counter.

“Thank you,” he said, taking it and pecking a kiss on your cheek. You looked up at him and he froze. “I am so sorry. I…”

“It’s okay. Go have fun and be all charitable,” you said. He shoved his phone in his pocket and ran out, JJ scratching her head.

“Dad’s kinda weird sometimes,” she said.

“Yeah, he is. But so is everybody,” you said. “Let’s get this in the oven so you guys can pick out colors for your frosting, hm?”

“I really shouldn’t. But I really should,” you said to yourself, plopping your second brownie of the night in a bowl and sticking a scoop of ice cream on top. You carried it over to the couch and lay back, watching TV on the big screen as you heard the door open. Jensen came into view a minute later, taking his jacket off and groaning as he washed up at the sink. He went to the tray of brownies on the counter and picked one up with a big sigh. “Fun night?”

He jumped and whacked his head against the cabinet above, hissing before he spun around.

“You okay?” you asked. He nodded and left the brownie behind, pushing his sleeves up before taking a seat on the other end of the lounger.

“Y/N I’m really sorry about the kiss on the cheek. That was so inappropriate. You’ve kinda implied that there was some stuff that’s happened to you at other jobs you found over the line and I’m really truly sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I wasn’t...I forgot you’re my employee for a moment. I really am sorry.”

“Jensen if I had a problem with it or you or your behavior I would quit on the spot. I don’t let myself get pushed around anymore. You were happy and busy and you pecked a kiss on my cheek, not reach a hand down my pants. It’s really okay. You’re way too hard on yourself.”

“Are you sure?” he asked.

“Positive. It’s barely ten which means you left as soon as you could. You’re supposed to be out having fun,” you said.

“I was kinda freaking out that you hated me,” he said.

“Dude you gotta relax,” you said. “Have a brownie and some ice cream.”

He got up and after a minute took a seat at the other end with a bowl of his own, smiling as he got a taste.

“This is fucking awesome,” he said.

“I know,” you said, Jensen smirking. “Do you feel better now silly boy? I promise that if you ever do anything I find inappropriate I will promptly kick you in the balls.”

“I can agree to that,” he said. He ate for a moment, watching the TV and laying back. “Do you ever like, want to go do things with your friends on a Saturday night? If you do that’s totally cool. These aren’t normal hours anyways.”

“Being a nanny eats up a lot of your social life,” you said. “Kinda got kicked out of my friend group after I broke up with my ex anyways.”

“Well they sound like they suck,” he said.

“Yes, they do,” you said. “I don’t mind so much. I meet plenty of new people through work. Only person you can depend on is yourself and I don’t tend to let myself down.”

“That’s a very lonely way to go through life,” he said.

“It’s not easy to make friends in your thirties,” you said. “Maybe for someone like you who travels and meets new people a lot and stuff but you have like, real friendships. You know?”

“Well we have a real friendship, don’t we? You’re friends with Jared and Rob and Ruthie and Rich,” he said. “I don’t trust just anybody with my kids. That’s real.”

“Yeah,” you said, taking a bite. “So when’s your friend free?”

“Hm?”

“Blind date guy. Maybe he could be a friend if things work out,” you said.

“Oh yeah. He uh, he actually got a gig up in Canada so you might need to wait like a month or so. But he’s excited to meet you,” said Jensen.

“Can I have his number?” you asked. “Or do you think that’d be weird?”

“No, not weird. I think he just kinda wants to do it old school if that’s okay. Meet you first and go from there.”

“This friend of yours better be like super hot,” you said.

“If it’s a problem-“

“I can respect him wanting to do things like that. But I’m gonna want a firm date soon,” you said.

“I’ll make sure to get you one,” he said. “I’ll get it down tomorrow, promise.”

“He better not mind me eating like this either. I ain’t a salad on the first date kinda girl. He’s gonna need to keep up with my eating while were at it,” you said. He snorted in his seat beside you and ran his hand over his face.

“I will keep that in mind. I have occasionally had dessert first truth be told,” he said.

“This is why I like you Ackles. You get my sweet tooth,” you laughed.

“It’s a good thing your dinners are healthy cause I swear I haven’t consumed this many baked goods in months,” he said. “The kids love it and my stomach loves it though.”

“I’m gonna need to start working out though if I keep this up. Oh hey is it okay if I do laps in the pool in the mornings? I’ll be super quiet and stuff.”

“You don’t gotta ask,” he smiled. “Like I said when you started, you got free reign to use the pool, the gym, whatever, aside from my room. You a swimmer?”

“Not really but I hate running and supposedly it’s a good workout or something,” you shrugged, eating another bite of brownie.

“Anything in the gym you’re free to use. I know you must get a little bored sometimes when I’m gone and the kids are,” he said.

“Not bored per say. Ordinarily I would do more chores but you have like a cleaner and a landscaper and you just...give me more time in the day than I’m used to is all. It’s actually great though. It gives me plenty of time to come up with ideas for the kids and stuff.”

“Well as long as you’re taking breaks and your lunch do as you please,” he said, his spoon scraping the bottom of his bowl.

“Now that’s just sad.”

“I really should get another one of these,” he said, sucking the spoon.

“It’s really the only choice you have,” you said. He laughed as he hopped up, skirting back into the kitchen and fixing up another brownie and ice cream combo.

“Hey you want more, Dee?” he asked. You popped your head up and he spun around. “I’m-“

“Don't apologize, Jensen,” you said. He tapped his fingers against the counter and took a deep breath, putting his back to you.

“That’s the second time tonight I’ve done that,” he said.

“Jensen. There’s nothing wrong with missing your wife.”

“I’m still sorry.”

“You don’t...talk about her much.”

“It was...she wasn’t…” he trailed off. He sat down on a barstool and you got up, walking over and hopping up on the counter beside him. You set your feet in the stool next to his and paused before you put a hand on top of his head and ran your fingers through the short strands. “This shouldn’t have happened to her.”

“Death is the price for living. Pain’s the price for caring. Doesn’t mean it’s not worth it,” you said. You started to move your hand away when he turned his head.

“Don’t…” he said, easing when you played with it gently again. “That’s always calmed me down since I was a little kid.”

“Someone should take care of you every once in a while you know. Your parents, siblings, friends. Everyone needs a break.”

“I had a lot of help at the beginning. I don’t need a whole day. Just a moment here and there,” he said quietly.

“It’ll be okay, Jensen,” you said. He nodded and you played with his hair a few moments, watching his shoulders ease. This time when you pulled away he smiled up at you. “Better?”

“Yeah. Thank you. That’s not in your job description to do that sort of thing.”

“Well I think your wife would want somebody to watch your back, even for only a minute or two,” you said.

“You don’t have any brain aneurysms I should know about, do you?” he chuckled.

“No. That what happened?” you asked, a single nod coming from him.

“She was sleeping. Not a bad way to go I was told, you’d never even know,” he said. “Not a fun thing to wake up to in the morning though.”

“My dad had a mass at the back of his head. It was that same kind of thing where one second it’s fine and the next everything’s different deal. It was inoperable. Then he goes and dies from a car accident of all things before it got bad. My mom had a hard time with that.”

“You said she had a boyfriend later on right?” he asked.

“Yeah. I know you’ll be okay, Jensen,” you said. You ruffled his hair and he smiled, a soft look on his face. “Pro tip too from someone who’s been there, kids with a single parent turn out just fine.”

“Do they ever wish they had another parent?” he asked.

“They wish the parent they still have around is happy again someday. They won’t understand until they’re older that it’s a different kind of love between parents. But they’ll know it’s a little different and they’ll hope dad feels better too. Your kids are tough. They’ll be okay too.”

“Thanks, Y/N,” he said. You hopped off the counter and washed up your dish, sticking it in the dishwasher before you went to leave for your room. “So I gotta ask. Who takes care of you?”

“Me?” you asked, pointing to yourself. He shrugged and smiled, your gaze going past him. “I’m all good. I don’t need somebody to take care of me.”

“Liar,” he said softly. “You know my friend tells me everybody needs to be taken care of sometimes.”

“That’s the difference between us Jensen. You’re not like me.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he scoffed, his face scrunching up suddenly.

“It means you’re not on your own and even if you feel like it, it’s only been a little while. You’ll be okay. I’ve been taking care of myself since I was a kid. I don’t need anyone to take care of me.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it.”

“You haven’t lived my life and I haven’t lived yours. Don’t try to tell me that I’m not capable of-”

“It’s not about what you’re capable of. You said pain is part of life, it’s the price for living. You’ve had more than your fair share-”

“Lots of people have it a lot worse.”

“Don’t compare your pain to someone else's. They haven’t lived your life,” he said. You rolled your eyes and started to walk away, Jensen out of his seat and catching up with you in the hall. “You can be taken care of too you know.”

“By who? My non-existent circle of friends? My crappy ex? My mom’s ex boyfriend who’s got his own wife and kids? I am perfectly fine managing all of this by myself. I’ve been doing it for years.”

“You’re so frustratingly annoying,” he said, running his hand over his face. “Me. I’m talking about me. You just...you took care of me tonight. The least I can do is show you the same compassion.”

“No,” you said.

“No? Why not?”

“Because taking care of me turns into you walking into my shower without my permission and you being a dick and this going away and I don’t want you to be those things so no. We’re getting too friendly. Please leave me alone tomorrow.”

You left him in the hall and went down to your area of the house, shutting the door after you. There was quickly a knock and you growled, ripping it open.

“What?” you snapped at him.

“I am not going to hurt you or be a dick to you or whatever else you think. You need to realize in the real world, not everyone is an asshole.”

“You’re the one not living in the real world then, Jensen. Everybody’s an asshole.”

“Fine. I’m an asshole. But I’m not leaving until you say I can take care of you tomorrow. Two minutes is all I’m asking for.”

“This is my part of the house.”

“And technically I am outside your door,” he said. “Why are you so resistant to somebody doing something nice for you?”

“Because I don’t wanna get used to it,” you said. He stared and you shook your head. “You’re attractive and an actor and kind and funny and it’s not a matter of if you date again but when and when that day comes, we ain’t gonna be sitting on the couch eating ice cream anymore. Please do not invite me to anymore outings as a friend. I’ll attend if required as a nanny but this between us is done.”

“For the record, the only one around here that thinks of you as just the hired help is you. My children are completely like their old selves. I feel more like my old self. You seem happier than when I met you but for some reason, that’s a big problem to you. I do not understand that.”

“Leave or I resign and move out first thing,” you said. He crossed his arms and lifted his chin. “This is my formal resignation then. The company will-”

He moved quickly and you weren’t sure what he was doing at first but soon you realized he was hugging you, your hands resting against his chest. You swallowed and he didn’t move, your forehead resting against him.

“What are you doing?” you breathed out.

“When’s the last time you got a fucking hug?” he asked.

“The kids-”

“Not the kids.”

“I don’t remember,” you said quietly.

“Then you are overdue,” he said. You let yourself reach your arms around him and return the hug, breathing deeply, a small bubble in you rising up. You tried to push it down but it came back harder and you were fighting back tears before you knew it.

He could feel when you lost that battle, hand rubbing up and down your back. There was a soft shushing in the air and after a few minutes you felt better. You lifted your head but didn’t look at him, Jensen squeezing you in his hug again before it eased.

“You know you’re not allowed to quit on me...like ever,” he chuckled. You let out a small laugh, Jensen smiling at you when you forced your head up. He wiped off your cheeks and you let out one last sniffle. “You’re not alone. I promise you’re not. It’s not the quantity of people you have in your life but the quality and I’m sorry but we are friends and there’s nothing you can do about that so I’d just accept it now.”

“I’m sorry I was such a bitch.”

“You were scared, not a bitch,” he said. “I wish I could make you happier is all.”

“I wish I could bring back your wife for you,” you said.

“One of those is a lot more possible than the other,” he said. A small smile crossed his lips before he ducked his head down, shoulders heaving back before his head raised. “Y/N, can I confess something to you? I hope...I hope it doesn’t bother you but if it does, you don’t have to continue working for me. I’d still like to be friends regardless.”

“What’s wrong?” you asked, Jensen looking past you.

“My single friend I was going to set you up with? He doesn’t exist.”

“Oh.”

“Cause he’s kinda me.”

“Oh,” you said, staring at him, a lot of his previous behavior starting to click into place. “That’s…”

“I know,” he said, stepping away and rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s weird and douchey and I’m sorry. I like you and I was trying to see if you would ever go for a 42 year old actor. I left out the widow and kids part but...I’m sorry.”

“When did you like me?” you asked quietly.

“The whole time?” he said, laughing nervously to himself. “It’s kinda snowballed since we met. I never in my life thought I’d like someone again. I didn’t want to like you. I hired you because you were the best candidate and I knew the kids would be in good hands but everyday it’s there, even more, and I know this is so inappropriate on so many levels and I’m really starting to ramble here but you make me think maybe your mom had a point and people are allowed to have...more than one…and sometimes the way you talk to me and treat me and look at me...”

He swallowed as you stepped in front of him, taking a quick breath.

“I will keep working for you and I’ll be your friend...and you can make me dinner tomorrow,” you said with a smile. “We’ll see where it goes from there?”

“You’re not...weirded out?” he asked.

“By your age, you’re my boss or the cheeky lying about a fake friend?” you said.

“All of the above.”

“Age doesn’t bother me. You have no idea how to be a boss, no offense, and the friend...I don’t blame you for wanting to test the waters first,” you said. “But I expect honesty from here on out.”

“Absolutely,” he said.

“Good,” you said.

“You do like me right?” he asked. “Like you don’t feel obligated or-”

“I like you Jensen. Why do you think I was trying to push you away before you got too close? I didn’t want to be hurt.”

“Give me a chance to not,” he said. “We can have dinner and see how it goes from there.”

“Normally the best course of action,” you said.

“But maybe with a few more hugs from now on,” he said. “For the both of us.”

“That’d be okay with me,” you said. He smiled and you returned it. “I guess I’ll see you in the morning then.”

“I guess you will,” he said. He turned to go when he spun back on his heels. “Or we could go back out there, eat way too much dessert and hang out?”

“Yeah,” you said with a smile. “Give me a minute to wash up my face.”

“Take all the time you want. I’m gonna change into something more comfortable anyways.”

He left and you washed off your face in the bathroom, drying it off and taking a deep breath.

You did like him. There was something calming about him to you and you enjoyed his company, even if it was just the two of you having a quiet cup of coffee in the morning.

But he was an actor. And kinda famous. And a widow. And had three kids.

“But your face is cute,” you said aloud, looking the mirror. “Gah, of course you have to be like...into me. Nutjob. He must be a nutjob. That’s it.”

“Y/N?” you heard him saying and you smacked yourself in the face. “Are you talking to yourself?”

“Uh, yeah,” you said, stepping out and seeing him in the hall sporting a pair of pajama pants and a t shirt. “That was fast.”

“Well I didn’t go through an eight step skin routine too,” he chuckled.

“For your information, my routine is only three steps,” you said, walking past him and waggling your fingers.

“I didn’t realize I was living with such a savage,” he said. You laughed and went back to the kitchen, making up another dish of brownie for him while he went over to where he kept his liquor. “You a bourbon kind of girl?”

“Is there any other kind?” you said.

“Touche.” He poured out two glasses and slid one over while you passed his bowl to him. “So what’s this three step routine? Do I need to up my game or what?”

“I think I need your routine, not the other way around,” you said.

“Nah. I like looking at your face more than mine. Trust me.”

“Oh. How long you been holding back those kinds of comments?” you teased.

“Longer than you’d think,” he said, sharing the bowl with you. “Feel okay now?”

“Yeah. I can’t remember the last time I cried,” you said. “Especially in front of someone.”

“A good cry session has never hurt in my experience. I’ll do it for work and stuff but normally I’m not much of one. Aside from the past six months I mean.”

“Are you ready to try this?” you asked.

“Yeah. I know I am,” he said. “I’m positive of it.”

“How can you know that?”

“Because you make me happy. You make me...want to do stuff again, believe in all the romantic...if I wasn’t ready, I’d feel guilty. But I don’t. I just know that maybe some people get more than one chance and maybe I’m one of them.”

“I know you are, whoever it ends up being,” you said.

“Are you ready to try this?”

You took a drink and bite of ice cream, pushing the bowl back.

“I miss my family,” you said. “I miss being happy. I’d like to...have someone that could take care of me for a moment every once in a while. I might mess that up sometimes but I’m willing to try.”

“Me too,” he said. “I’d expect some screw ups on this end too. I’ve been out of the dating game for a long time.”

“I’m sure it hasn’t changed all that much,” you said.

“Well I’ve never dated with kids and as a widow,” he said.

“I’m just in this for them to be honest,” you laughed.

“I see how it is,” he said with a smirk.

“I don’t think it’ll be as hard as you think,” you said.

“I hope not,” he said.

“Do they know? You want to date?”

“JJ does,” he said. “She’s little but she understands that it doesn’t mean I’ll never love her mother any less. She’s been strangely okay through this whole thing aside from the first few weeks. She helps her brother and sister out more now.”

“As someone who was that kid, minus the siblings, I know they’ll be okay. She’s a great kid. I’ve met plenty of spoiled brats. Yours are not.”

“Well that might just be the second best thing I’ve heard tonight,” he said.

“Whatever was the first?” you teased, eating a spoon of ice cream.

“Oh I think you know,” he said, stealing the spoon back. You smiled and heard some feet run around upstairs before the stairs creeped and a little head ducked down into view. “Arrow. It’s bedtime sweetie.”

“I had a accident,” she said. “Sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry for, honey,” he said. “I’ll be right back.”

“Want help?” you asked.

“Sure,” he said. He scooped up Arrow on the way up the stairs, setting her down in the kids bathroom. He got some clean pajamas and you found a pair of pull ups, Arrow pouting at you.

“I don’t need ‘em,” she said.

“Your brother wears them. I wore them and your mommy and daddy wore them. Everybody wears pull ups when they’re your age,” you said.

“Just tonight,” she said, stepping into them. Jensen walked past with the mattress liner and she was dressed by the time you heard the washer going off in the distance. You walked her back to bed, Jensen slipping in past you and tucking her in. “Night daddy.”

“Night sweetie,” he said, kissing her temple.

“Night Y/N,” she said.

“Night night kiddo,” you said, giving her a tiny wave before you left, Jensen flipping off her light and pulling the door shut.

“Come here a second,” he said, nodding and you saw him head towards his room. The double doors were open and you stepped inside, Jensen going past the bed and over to a set of french doors. He pushed one open and waved for you to follow, showing you out to a rooftop balcony.

“Wow,” you said, a set of chairs, a table and a lounger out there along with a whole lot soft string lights. “I didn’t realize you had this up here.”

“Kinda a place to go unwind, relax,” he said. “I disappear out here sometimes. Been out here a lot at night lately.”

“Thinking about what?” you asked.

“You,” he said. “I talk to Dee about you sometimes as crazy as that sounds.”

“Doesn’t sound crazy at all,” you said.

“I just wanted to say...this area isn’t off limits anymore. Nothing is,” he said.

“She asked you out, didn’t she,” you said with a smile. He rubbed the back of his neck and blushed. “You’re cute.”

You leaned up and kissed his cheek, heading back towards inside.

“Come on, Jensen. Before the ice cream melts on us.”

_______

A/N: Read Part 4 here!

#spn #supernatural #jensen x reader #jensen ackles #jensen ackles au #rpf #jensen series #rpf series #jensen ackles x reader #spn fanfic #jensen fanfic #jensen ackles fanfic #supernatural fanfic

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myloveandlifeinlajolla · 2 years

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It’s good to know that this still helps some people/Being MIA / Update

I haven’t been on Tumblr for some time. Honestly, life is just so busy that it’s hard to find the time to sit and write.

A little update then. My sisters are doing great. My youngest is still taking classes remotely from La Jolla and says she has no desire to go back to NY. . She lives at the La Jolla house with my grandparents. I think she really enjoys hearing all the stories of dad and mom. She get’s questions all the time about boiys, classes, why don’t I date, all the usual stuff. The Coronado house we bought for them is just a rental now and dad keeps it. My mIddle sister is going around Europe right now and has been having a blast. We went out for a week to visit her. I have completely forgot what it’s like to travel. Como and Niece were so amazing. It was a much needed break because I have been living in a book for the past year. My first year went well but very tough. It took me a while to get my head back into study mode. And honestly pulling 6am to 1am days get’s very old very quickly. I used to drink quite a bit of tea but I have been living off of coffee, cappuccinos, and yes the total basic pumpkin when its out. I am finding I like living in the bay area much more than visiting. There is a small cafe I like to study at but it’s a bit of a drive/walk called, cafe Trieste. There is something amazing in this city for everyone. The big festivals are fun and a great way to experience parts of the city. Dad is moving his boat up here and has found a new passion in road-bikes and crossfit. I can’t say I mind I haven’t seen his legs look that good in a long time and the lifting has totally boosted his libeato. Ugh... rar it’s been fun for sure. The business has been amazing right during the last 2 years. I guess that’s a good thing that came from covid. And, it forced me to make a concrete move on my career.

The new house is just about done it’s stunning and I never thought I would go for an older style house but I fell in love with this one. The floors are white oak, there is wainscoting everywhere, The kitchen is amazing, Anyways, that’s done. Were moved in. Dad has the top floor pretty much to himself. (and me). His study is absolutely amazing and I find myself using it alot more than him.

Dad and I are still great. We are not nearly as careful as we were in San Diego. Here people assume that I am either his trophy wife or and escort. I don’t really hang out with people from school and I’m not a party animal as much as I used to be; only when Catie comes up. IT was fun we took Catie out when she came to visit and Dad knew she knew but it was like the first time that he didn’t pretend anything was going on. He greeted her like normal and then he came back to the loveseat and sat back right next to me and put his arm around me and let me put my hand on his thigh....wow there big steps! He’s been working out doing HIIT, Crossfit, and riding and it has made him really fit I didn’t mind when he lost his abs because honestly so did I but now his shoulders are huge, his lats look like he’s been swimming again. His calves look like his legs swallowed a grapefruit. Ugh it just makes me want to jump his bones everytime were together. The sex has been incredible, I have been joining him in the shower again like I haven’t since my college days and I’m not saying I have the motivation for a bj every morning but he definitely gets alot more of them. He’s still super soft in bed and sometimes I still have to take charge but man he’s still got it. There was one Saturday i woke up early (for me) he was in the shower and I was still sore from the last night but I went in and started my thing and he came, then had me on the bed again which was great but I was still oozing from last night and he just straight re arranged my guts, I swear I could feel him under my stomach. I came so many times, I oozed all day! Let;s just the move has been great for our sex life and relationship.

The other day I had the privilege of talking to a new follower.

myloveandlifeinlajolla Hi, and thanks for the reblogs. I love yours as well. I try to say hi to everyone that stops by. Anyways, have a good day!

- Oh wow, that is so kind of you 🌸🫧 Thank you for being so open and honest and sharing glimpses of your life with such clarity. That truly means a lot and somehow makes a lot of difference! It‘s encouraging to read your story and I am grateful that you speak up about it. Thank you so much being!

myloveandlifeinlajolla Are you involved in it?

-No, I‘m not. Coming from a different niche. I have experienced what many people call child abuse. And while there are some effects that have been causing long lasting damage, which definitely have been frightening and scarring me emotionally, there were plenty of moments filled with immense pleasure even as a young child. What I perceived to be the most traumatizing was the social mindset and tabooing of sexuality in children. As there is no open and public discussion about it, there is no opportunity to integrate a healthy sexuality into a young persons life, causing all sorts of dilemma and everyone pointing the finger at the other. It‘s truly agonizing to me to watch this happen, as this leads to preventable harm being caused. Children are humans too and denying that won‘t eradicate their sexuality, even if it is different from adult sexuality. You sharing your story opens up a discussion about different forms of sexuality in a non-judgmental way. I‘d love to see this happen more often, which is why your blog has got such an important impact on me. Deeply appreciate you for that

myloveandlifeinlajolla I am so glad I can help. If you want to talk to me about this stuff Id love to hear your story.

myloveandlifeinlajolla It's so complicated. Everyone is slightly different and I understand the desire to protect younger children because honestly most have no idea what they are doing, have bad judgement etc... Take me for example If i knew we going to end up like this I would have been active as early as I could . like I knew what kissing was and that's sex was a thing adults did who loved each other. I had a very elementary understanding of the concept. I'm not sure if my understanding would have changed with more conversations or exposure to it.

-Oh I would love to stay in touch. It means a lot being able to talk about such matters openly! I haven’t introduced myself yet, I‘m Shelley 🌸

-I‘m quite busy at the moment which is why I can’t fully jot down my story now. It‘s difficult to do as well, because I‘m struggling with memory barriers. My flashbacks are incoherent and rather physical (so next to no visuals and no clear story). It’s happened inside the family including stepfathers (I had more than one). What I do remember clearly is that I had quite a flirty relationship with my last stepfather. We would go on dates (dinner, movie night, I smoked my first cigarette with him, he promised me to take me overseas). That was in full awareness of my mother. I loved him. I was in love with him. I still dream of sleeping with him. We did not have sex in those days of my teenage years and I cannot recollect for my life if it was him I don’t had sexual encounters as a child or someone else. I am mourning missed opportunities I could have had with him, but I also build myself anew. I brokered contact with him at 17. I’m 23 now. I‘m yearning for his touch as much as I am relieved to have started a life of my own. It‘s no clear lines, I cannot tell what is right or wrong. I‘ve been coming to terms with the fact that essentially I was in a three way relationship with my mother and stepfather. Watching them have sex as a child. Was it dreams that involved me in those encounters or was it real - I honestly do not know. But I did feel pleasure at times. I cannot tell whose hands it were that introduced me to my clitoris. That tingling sensation, the overwhelming pleasure that made me addicted and ready to submit to whatever would promise me such a feeling again. There were chocking hands and bathtub water. A red penis to be swallowed. I know not many believe in that, but I was fully capable of squirting and causing huge wet spots after hours of being brought to the edge as a child. All of this also made me an outsider among my peers, because I soon figured out I could not talk about such things. Either because I was seen as a dramatic liar or because it would disturb and harm others.

-I‘m sorry for some of the unfitting words. Autocorrect wanted to have a say as well 😅

-I so lace what you have been saying in your second message! It really is complicated! I can totally see the desire to protect a young being as well! I‘m just wondering, if that is possible by completely sheltering and isolating them from sexuality. In my journey to understand my life I have stumbled across a book called Emotional Flow: A Holistic Approach To Healing Sadism. I’ve found some view points in that book to be quite thought provoking, as it was mentioning other cultures in which children as young as 3 years old, that also grew up uns village, were being allowed to live in seperate shelters with other kids their age. It would be totally normal for them to explore and engage in there sexuality. At their pace. Among their age. The book stated that apparently that village had a crime rate next to none. I do not know, if that is true, or a bit skewed, but it would be interesting to explore. It goes on to mention that in our society that would be difficult to introduce as so many are quite rigid, which is also a sign of unhealed wounds. But the author mentions that there are sage ways in which adults may even engage sexually with very young children, if they were only shown how to properly do it without causing the pain, which is what is traumatizing. I also do not know how ideal of an idea that is. But again worth talking about. In this sentiment I am not surprised at all to hear you say that your relationship with your father was on your mind so early. Please know there are people out there who can meet you at your level without any judgement or overindulgent reaction. Would love to hear from you again. Sending my love out to you 💕☘️🐬 -I so agree with your last message*

myloveandlifeinlajollawould you mind if I posted our conversation? I always keep people anon.

-No, would not mind at all :)

#myloveandlifeinlajolla #myloveandlifeinlj #lajolla #san francisco #daddy #daddy/daughter #hot daddy #consanguinamory #what's your story

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jayfortheday · 2 years

Note

this might just be a tradition for mostly black people but sundays/saturdays are cleaning days and you get woken up by loud ass gospel music. it’s an experience aged up eli with his black wife and kids and the reader is living up to this tradition and instead of gospel it’s just metallica in eli’s expensive ass speakers. she makes him gets up and clean even though he doesn’t want to. trying to flirt his way out of it until the kids come in the room “momma said clean or else” and he picks the easiest task and gets thumped. “eli.. clean or you’re gonna be in the dog house” insinuating they won’t be having sex for a whole and the kids are standing behind her like “do what she says”

Not Getting Out Of This (Eli Brooks)

Pairing: Eli Brooks x Black!F!Reader

Word count: 597

Description: On Sundays, Eli gets woken up by loud music, and his wife, Y/N, makes everyone clean the house

Tags: fluff, domestic, aged up, kids, hint at smut

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eli jolted awake to the sound of For Whom The Bell Tolls blaring through the speakers downstairs. The sound of rapid knocking on the door only added to his sense of alarm.

“Come on, E!” You called from the other side of the door. “Time to get your lazy ass outta bed, we got stuff to do!” Eli groaned in response, taking the pillow out from underneath his head and pressing it against his ears to stifle the sounds. “We’re makin’ eggs downstairs, you’re gonna have to hurry up if you want some.”

Eli listened to the sound of your footsteps receding before snuggling back into the bed. He loved you so much, but he hated waking up this early. If he could help it, Eli would never wake up before noon. He pulled the blankets up over his head, trying to let the screaming music become background noise.

Downstairs, you were busy making scrambled eggs, the only type your kids would eat at the moment.

“Hmm, dad still isn’t up,” you commented, looking down to the youngest, sitting at your feet.

“Yeah,” she giggled. “Dad’s lazy.”

“You’re not wrong, baby,” you agreed, a smile crossing your face. “Now go get your brother, I’m almost done with the eggs.” Your daughter nodded happily before trotting into the living room.

“And poke your dad while you’re at it,” you called out. “You or your brother, just one of you!” You turned off the burner, plated up the eggs, and set them at the table.

Another knock on the door once again pulled Eli from his drowsy state.

“Dad!” A small voice called from the other side of the door.

“Come in, sweetheart,” Eli yawned, sitting up and stretching out his arms. The door opened and a little boy entered the room. “What’s up, bud?”

“Mom said you gotta come downstairs, she made food. She also said that we have stuff to do, so you gotta come down,” the boy said, closing his eyes, thinking to make sure he remembered everything he had to say.

Eli rubbed some of the sleep from his eyes and groaned as he turned to step out of bed.

“Alright, alright,” he sighed, walking towards his son and taking his hand. “Let’s go.” The pair descended the stairs, arriving at the table and sitting down.

“Well well, look who finally decided to start the day,” you chuckled as you saw Eli leaned back in his chair, still half asleep.

“I wanna go back to sleep,” Eli groaned, wrapping an arm around your waist when you walked over to set a plate in front of the kids.

“Normally, I’d let you, but not today,” you said, reaching up to run your fingers through his hair.

“Can you really say no to this face?” Eli joked, looking up at you with tired puppy dog eyes. “After all I did for you last night?” Your face blushed as you remembered exactly what Eli had done the previous night. You playfully smacked his hand, glancing up at the kids who were watching the two of you.

“Not even that can get you out of this, Brooks,” you laughed as you walked away from him. “Now you can help me today, or you won’t have to worry about doing stuff for me for a long while.”

Eli groaned and gave you a half-hearted frown.

“You know my weaknesses too well,” he sighed, standing up to join you in the kitchen.

“What’s your weakness, dad?” You heard your daughter ask from the table.

“Uhhh,” Eli hesitated. “Don’t worry about it.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Hope you guys enjoyed! Despite having parents, I have no idea how parents interact with their kids. I also didn't give the kids names with the idea you could name them, so it was awkward referring to them in the story, oops

Also I’m trying to phase out of my break to slowly releasing some stories so I should hopefully have some stuff out again soon

Also I literally just called out of work sick for the first time at this job, I feel like absolute shit 🫠

#eli brooks #eli brooks x reader #the girl next door #fanfic #fanfiction

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liberty-barnes · 4 years

Text

Just Breathe

Tom Holland x Female!Osterfield!Bisexual!Reader

Summary: Childbirth waits for no one, not even the Oscars.

Warnings: fluuuuuff, pregnant reader, mentions of childbirth, good press articles, BISEXUAL READER WOOOHOOO

Word Count: 1.5k words

Estimated Reading Time: 6 minutes

A/N: heeeeey look @peterspideyy @parkersbliss that crazy idea i ranted to you about like six months ago finally got done! i can’t believe i did it... this feels too good to be true, is the world gonna end or something?

Masterlist

"I don't think this is a good idea."

"Me neither."

"Please, just stay here."

You looked up to your brother and husband, frowning as you smoothed your hand over the soft black fabric of your gown.

"I am not missing the Oscars, Tom. I've still got two weeks until I'm due, it'll be fine."

You sat down on the bed and looked dejectedly at your shoes, then proceeded to throw puppy dog eyes your brother's way until Harrison had no choice but to kneel and help you put on your comfortable trainers. There's no way you're putting on your heels at 37 weeks of pregnancy.

"But what if Baby decides to come sooner? You could go into labour at any moment!"

You rolled your eyes and only raised your arms so they could help you out of bed.

"You guys are being over-dramatic. Nothing's gonna happen. We're just going to the Oscars, we'll have a good time, and hopefully, I'll leave with a little statue under my arm."

With that, you waddled out of your hotel room, ready to get into the limo.

---

"(Y/n)! It's so good to see you! You look radiant as always!"

You smiled at Kaitlyn, an interviewer you knew and trusted and rubbed your belly comfortingly.

"Thank you, I feel like a whale, but Baby'll be here soon so it's worth it."

She smiled and asked you a bunch of questions about your movie and how you were feeling about being nominated for Best Actress.

"But anyway, how far along are you now?"

"I'm a little over 37 weeks, they should be coming soon. Tom and Haz were actually really apprehensive about me coming here since I'm so close to my due date."

She smiled and looked over at the two men, obviously on edge.

"Well, I wish you all the best and I sincerely hope you win."

You hugged her goodbye and posed for a few more pictures before being led inside by your husband.

---

"And now, for the moment you've all been waiting for..."

Everyone watched with bated breath as Brie Larson, last year's winner, got ready to announce who would take home the trophy.

"This year's winner, and taking home the Oscar for best actress in a leading role..."

Tom took your hand and you squeezed it tight, ready to applaud one of the other amazing actresses on their win.

"(Y/n) Holland, for her brilliant performance in Two Sides of the Same Coin!"

You felt like your heart was gonna beat out of your chest, run to that stage, kiss Brie, then promptly burst to flames out of sheer, unadulterated enthusiasm. Tom was hugging you and whispering how much you deserved it while your brother gently guided you to the podium. None of them would ever allow you to go up there on your own. Always one in front of you in case you trip forward and one behind you to catch you if you fall back.

Overprotective much?

As soon as you reached Brie, you hugged her tight (or as tight as you could with a human baby house separating you), taking the award while the two boys hugged her too.

"Holy Louis Tomlinson in a crop top."

The audience laughed, most of them already familiar with your strange One Direction inspired expressions.

"Wow, I didn't actually think I was gonna win this, everyone had such amazing performances. I-It's an honour, really. Two Sides of the Same Coin was a project very near and dear to my heart, so I'd like to thank the amazing Drew Barrymore, who wrote and directed the movie."

The room erupted in cheers and the woman smiled at you from her place on the front row.

"Bisexual representation is something we don't get very often, and when we do, it's always misjudged. So thank you for showing the world what bisexuality really is, and for giving me a chance to live out my dreams of kissing lots of people. This idiot tied me down too soon."

You pointed behind you at Tom, hearing his appalled squeak along with Harrison's guffaw of a laugh.

In other news, the baby was starting to inconvenience you slightly. Baby had been going crazy since last night (not that you'd tell the boys) and the Braxton-Hicks were killing you, but it only got worse now.

"I'd also like to thank my amazing costars, Zendaya, Bella Thorne, and Owen Patrick Joyner, it was awesome to make out with you all..."

The crowd laughed while you felt something trickle down your legs.

Oh.

OH.

You'll never live this down, that's for sure.

"Uh, before I finish can one of you idiots call the car and get them to come to the exit please and thank you? Now as I was saying-"

"Wait, why?"

You turned to your brother and smiled innocently.

"Oh, my water just broke."

The crowd cheered.

Tom screamed.

Harrison fell to the floor, unconscious.

You sighed.

"New plan, can anyone try to wake my brother while my hus-"

You looked at Tom, frantically doing small back and forths between you and his best friend, unsure of what to do.

"-While someone else calls the car because both of them are apparently useless."

"We need to get you to the hospital!"

His terrified scream could be heard all through the room, even with no mic.

"What? No! I need to finish my acceptance speech, then go back to the hotel to shower and maybe take a little nap and then go to the hospital. My water just broke, Thomas, we have time, calm your tits."

You turned back fully to the mic, facing the hysteric faces of the crowd, very entertained by the exchange.

"Now as I was saying, I want to thank the amazing team that worked on this movie, you're all amazing and it was such a good experience. I'd also like to thank my family for always being there for me and supporting me and Haz in our acting careers. Thank you to my brother, even if he's unconscious right now, he'll just watch it on Youtube later, for literally forcing me to go to the audition. And lastly, I'd like to thank my wonderful husband, who hopefully hasn't passed out yet, for always supporting me and being my biggest rock through everything. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to deliver a baby, you know, just normal Saturday night stuff."

---

An Oscar in hand and another... down her legs?

(Y/n) Holland sure gave the Oscars something to be entertained by on this last Saturday. The wife of fellow actor Tom Holland looked radiant in her custom-made Valentino dress, looking ready for a night of fun.

(Y/n) was nominated for this year's Best Actress in a Leading Role award, alongside Meryl Streep, Margot Robbie, Cate Blanchett, and Tessa Thompson, but the Oscar went to her from her brilliant performance in Two Sides of the Same Coin. But it was during her acceptance speech that things got... slippery.

At 37 weeks of pregnancy, the Holland baby was ready to come at any minute, but apparently, theatrics run in the family. The actress was in the middle of her speech when she felt her water break, pausing in her talking to request a car be called.

You'd think her husband, Tom, and brother Harrison Osterfield, overprotective as they are, would be fully prepared! Unfortunately for them, and fortunately for our entertainment, they were not. Harrison went unconscious after hearing the news, dropping to the floor and earning himself a minor concussion, much to his sister's amusement

[image1-harrison-ice-pack.png]

@ynholland: "Don't worry, when you go into labour, I'll be with you every step of the way." Said Harrison Osterfield, then proceeded to pass out, get a minor concussion, and miss the whole delivery.😂 Good job, little bro👍

And just when you thought she couldn't get any better, she finishes her acceptance speech with: "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to deliver a baby, you know, just normal Saturday night stuff." We have no choice but to stan this iconic queen!

But for the news you've all been waiting for, Oscar Robert Holland (yes, the middle name is a homage to Robert Downey Jr. himself, we're not crying, you are!) was born just twelve hours later. Tom let know through a beautiful Instagram picture that he is in fact "perfectly healthy and loved by everyone already".

[image2-tom-and-oscar.png]

@tomholland2013: I present to you, my best creation to this date: Oscar Robert Holland. Thank you all for your prayers and kind messages, our boy is perfectly healthy and loved by everyone already❤️

But of course, Uncle Haz wouldn't stay behind.

[image3-haz-and-oscar.png]

@hazosterfield: Since I know you've all been worried sick and desperate to know how the baby is... I'm doing just fine, it's just a minor concussion :) Oh and my godson's great too.

And just to prove that the Osterfields are indeed the royal family of comedy, we leave with this wonderful picture posted to the happy mum's very own Instagram.

[image4-yn-and-oscars.png]

@ynholland: Guess I was so good they gave two Oscars instead of one ;)

-Written by Kaitlyn Storm

so anyway, Two Sides of the Same Coin is a movie idea i got a while ago and should maybe try to write one of these days but oh well or something. anyway, i’m not gonna rant about it here cause it’d be too long but i hope you enjoyed this and don’t forget to like/comment/reblog if you feel like it!

-Love, Miah

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

Taglists: (if your name is striked through it means for some reason tumblr wouldn’t let me tag you)

PERMA TAG

@adriannajackson123 @theamazingtomholland @inlovewithmobtom @andycanbeemotional @officiallyunofficialperson @lost-in-the-stars03 @jeezkiddo @a-singleboat @wunder-13 @highlydisfunctional1 @ellyseveronica @inthecornerchair @harishaanne @anjalika03 @lozzypoz321 @mendes-marvel @sovereignparker @bubbles-the-powerpuffgurl

MARVEL ACTORS

@sarcasticallywitty15 @agentnataliahofferson @onelovesr @agentnataliahofferson @parkerpetertingle @juliebean247 @frustratingpaperclip @tacobacoyeet

HOLLAND & CO.

@sarcasticallywitty15 @agentnataliahofferson @onelovesr @agentnataliahofferson @zeusmyster @parkerpetertingle @juliebean247 @joyleenl @quaksonhehe @clara-licht @frustratingpaperclip @tutuabby28 @tacobacoyeet

LGBTQ+

@quaksonhehe

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miraculous-trinity-leo · 3 years

Text

Tᕼᗴ ᑕᕼᗩOTIᑕ ᗩᑎᘜᗴᒪ

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)

Chapter 3: Au Revoir Gotham My True Home

•—–—–·†·–—–—•

Marinette explained what happened and that she didn't mean to cause trouble, she didn't know why the bats were looking for her (author to audience... it's because she looks like one of his bat kids gone rouge.) When she asked how they knew the Bat was looking for her, she found out that Selina was actually dating the Bat... So Marinette was very surprised at that, her family talked about it and a few days after her birthday she'll be going to Paris, France with Selina to be with a family friend of hers. Marinette was now really thinking she was cursed, but she made sure to take it in stride and spend as much time with her friends and family as possible.

"Doan wawhry suguh, we'll make sure tuh visit as much as possible, yuh can even visit us durin' summuh and wintuh break." - Harley held back the tears as she hugged Marinette, Bud, Lou, Ivy, Selina, Ed and even Frank joined in on it.

……… ………

Marinette was out with her friends still not sure how to tell them, she started with the obvious.

"Sooo... tomorrow I turn 10... the double digits." - Marinette

"Soon you'll be one of us!" - Garfield gave Marinette a side hug with a big smile, god he made it harder to tell them

"So what do you want to do? We can celebrate, tomorrow and the day after that, and the day after that, heck we can celebrate for the whole week while we're at it!" - Garfield

Rachel noticed the sad smile Marinette had as Garfield continued talking.

"Is there something you need to tell us?" - Rachel's words stoped Garfield in his tracks, he then looked at a slightly teary Marinette, and he felt a slight tinge of pain in his chest.

"I- um, I'm moving this Saturday... I'm sorry I really don't want to, but- *hic* I-" - Marinette was cut off by Garfield giving her a hug, he rubbed small circles on her back as she let out a few sobs. Rachel patting her shoulder to try and comfort her.

After they were like that for a few minutes, they decided to get ice cream

……… ……… ………

"I'm sorry." - Marinette eating her chocolate chip ice cream

"It's not your fault Mari, besides, we can officially say we have a pen pal in Paris." - Garfield with his chocolate mint ice cream trying to lighten the mood, managed to get a chuckle out of Marinette.

"We can still video call, or text you. And your parents said you can visit on summer and winter break." - Rachel just starting her strawberry ice cream

"But what if I need a friend to talk to when I can't sleep? Or if I need a movie buddy? Or gaming buddy?" - Marinette

"There are online multiplayer games we can play you know." - Rachel

"Yeah, and I'm sure you'll make friends over there really quickly, I mean you already know a few other languages, including French, so there isn't any communication problems." - Garfield

"I wish you guys could come with me..." - Marinette almost done with her ice cream

"... Didn't you say you always wanted a hamster, maybe one that's unique, like a the rare Green Gotham Hamster?" - Garfield with a mischievous grin

"Selina's family friends own a bakery, so no pets allowed. Sorry Rare Green Gotham Hamster, I'm afraid you're staying native to Gotham." - Marinette said patting his shoulder.

"Wait they own a bakery?! As in you can be on a sugar high 24/7?! Take me with you!!" - Garfield

……… ……… ………

Soon it was time for them to go home, when Marinette got home, she continued packing what she would need, making sure that her Siren plushies where safely secure, and then went to eat dinner.

The next day she made sure to get up early, Garfield and Rachel knew where she lived, and wanted to make sure everything was ready for them, setting up the games they would play into the night, and the movies they would watch after that.

She then went to the Gardens to greet her Mom and the plants, doing the usual routine of checking all the plants, complimenting and watering them. During which a sleepy Harley walked over giving Ivy and Marinette a morning kiss before going to make her coffee.

At breakfast she didn't see her Aunt yet, she assumed she was robbing someone rich again.

……… Over to Catwoman ………

"Come ta mama." - Catwoman mumbled as she used her claws to cut the glass surrounding an old elegant purple sapphire that belonged to one of Gotham's founding fathers' wives.

……… Back to Marinette ………

About an hour after breakfast Garfield and Rachel came over, holding Marinettes' rapped presents, they started the day off with trivia games, which they called the MIQ (which can mean either Marinette Isley-Quinzel or in this case Memory Intelligence Quiz) which Marinette and Rachel came to a tie followed by Ivy, then Harley, and Garfield. They then moved on to board games, Marinette decided to play The Game of Life rather than Monopoly (because lets be honest, who has ever finished that game in the time of a signle day? An extreme speedrunner... maybe.) while the adults got the cake ready. Surprisingly Garfield won, he got the acting career, a sports car, a nice old fashioned mid modern house, a wife, and 3 kids... Marinette got the fashion designer career, got a motorcycle, and a small, but nice victorian house, a husband, and one kid... and Rachel got the scientist career (because science is just simplified mortal magic), a delorean car (and even said "Since science is magic I can make it fly, so technically, I don't need roads where I'm going."), a modern cabin in the woods, single (she didn't want a significant other to interrupt her magic science) and got a pet bird.

Once Selina and Ed came over, they began the party, playing games like DDR, Ultimate Mecha Strike 2, and Racing games.

When it came time for Marinette to blow out her candles, she wished that everything would be okay, and that she will be able to come back to Gotham permanently, and blew them out.

She then got to open her presents, she started with Harley's, and got a custom baseball bat that was a dark steel blue, with a light grey handle grip, and it had the words "Quinn For Da Win" on it, putting a smile on her face, when she opened Ivy's gift she got seeds of her favorite flowers to plant over in Paris. She then opened her Uncle Ed's gift, which was a small watch that had special A.I., it had a cover over the inside screen that would flip open to reveal another screen. The cover was silver with a blue question mark, and when it opened, it showed the time, and the location you where in, it could also act as a GPS, and a phone (it could even play music AND had an incredible battery life span). She then moved on to her Aunt Selina's gift, finding a small purple sapphire in the shape of a cat paw, surrounded in silver. She then opened Rachel's gift, it was a travel mug that said "Coffee lives in my veins." (Marinette started drinking coffee recently) which made Marinette laugh, and then she got to Garfield's gift. When she opened it, she found a handmade charm bracelet, it had animals that she really liked around it, and there was one that was a small tiger, with it's eyes and nose having a light green peridot stone, to represent the first day they met. She put the bracelet on her right rist and thanked Garfield for it, and gave everyone a big hug.

She spent the rest of the day playing with her friends, having a wonderful time, and getting a massive sugar rush from all the cake they had. When it came time for dinner they were running low on energy, but were back to normal after Harley snuck some coffee into their food... The only thoughts that went through Garfield and Rachel's minds where "That's why Mari drinks this stuff..."

After dinner they played all kinds of video games, and ended it by watching Back To The Future. They fell asleep some time after 2am.

……… ……… …….

The next morning they all had breakfast and then spent the day playing parkour tag over roofs and playing I spy games. And at the end of the day Marinette gave her friends a big hug, before heading back home. She spent her time with her moms, Uncle, and Frank, playing more boardgames and discussing what she should do to make friends...

"Just be yawhself, we love yuh fawh who yuh are, and I'm sure everyone in Paris will love yuh too... if dey doan, den dey most likely have a massive defective reject of a brain." - Was Harley's opinion

"Riddle the f-ck out of their brain, if they can solve all of them, and like you for you, then they are worthy." - Which was Ed's opinion

"Use a chemical based compound from the magnolia flower, combined with three tulip petals, one rose petal, and pollen from a lilac to create a befriending potion." - Ivy's words made everyone silent before Ed spoke up

"... Harley if you're being mind controlled blink." - Ed deadpaned, which had Marinette cackling

"I'm not bein' mind controlled, also yuh nawhmally say ‘blink once or twice’ not just ‘blink’ I could blink at any random interval and yuh woun't know what tuh tink, and here I thoughtcha were a genius." - Harley with her head on Ivy's lap as Marinette starts wheezing.

"I think y'all broke her." - Frank just pointed to Marinette as she was still cackling and wheezing while in the fetal position.

That's when Selina walked in...

"What the hell did you guys do to Kitten?!" - Selina dropping the bags she got from some high end shop, and after they made sure Marinette was still alive they continued their game... and Marinette may have actually written the list of ingredients for that position, but only as a last resort. When it was time for them to sleep Marinette spent the night with her moms, like she use to when she was 4.

She got up early to make sure everything was ready, she had her sketch book in her backpack, as well as some pencils, ear buds, snacks and a picture of her with her family and friends. She decided to wear her new watch and charm bracelet as she finished checking her bag, she then went into the garden to say goodbye to all the plants, and to give Bud, Lou and Frank one last goodbye. She had about 3 hours before her and her Aunt were to head to the airport, and she spent that time with her moms, almost never leaving their side.

……… ……… …….

As the plane took off she looked out the airplane window, saying goodbye to Gotham, until her next visit home....

•—–·★·–—•

Chapter 3 complete, also just in case I didn't describe her B-day gifts good enough, here's what they look like (꒪꒳꒪)

Hope you're all having an amazing day, staying safe and rockin' all positive vibes,!BUG-OUT! 💮🐞💮

〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜Tag List〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜

1st Place★: @jumpingjoy82

2nd Place★: @myazael

3rd Place★: @solangelo252

@fandom-trapped-03, @zorua-adorable, @blueblossombliss, @thefangirlwholiterallydies, @woe-is-me0, @lady-bee-fechin, @jayjayspixiepop, @kashlyn, @toodaloo-kangaroo, @buginetye, @our-preciousss , @vroomtaka, @alessialeone6997

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ashintheairlikesnow · 3 years

Note

Seconding the 'mob guys watching over Chris for Paul's suggestion!

CW: References to murder/mob organization stuff, references to parental death, grief, referenced past whump of a minor

Every Tuesday at 9 am, just like clockwork, Sean Malley lumbers into a coffeeshop nestled into the corner of a flat featureless strip mall. Contrasting to the pale concrete nothingness of its surrounding, the little coffeeshop is painted a warm, rich brown along the exterior, with heavy platers spilling over with purple and yellow flowers every few feet until Sean reaches the door.

It’s a welcome bit of individuality along this ring of small strip malls and larger big-box stores kept out of the city proper by a pile of zoning laws too draconian to fight. He’s been coming here for ten years now, more or less, and has seen the little coffeshop through its earliest days struggling for business right to now, where he feels reasonably certain he’ll be dead long before they close this place for good.

He moves inside, the light immediately warm and slightly dimmed. The scent in the air of freshly roasted coffee beans and baked goods. The cannolis they sell came from him, Sean’s proud of that - his wife had a favorite recipe and he’d given it to them after she passed, hoping for one batch for the service. They’d just kept making them, having one ready for him when he popped in, and... well, they’ve sold them ever since. Even call them Christa’s Cannolis, handwritten in cursive on a little placard. She’d have been tickled pink, he thinks sometimes, to see it.

One of his knees comes and goes as it pleases these days, giving his step a bit of a shuffle-scrape. He’s smiling, though, and humming as he goes.

Life is good for Sean Malley, all things considered.

Truth be told, he hadn't actually expected to live this long. Keeping close to Conor and his family had paid off in the early days - just as his instincts had kept him safe when the Garden erupted in in-fighting, too. When the Clean-Up happened, during the Garden’s most vicious in-fighting, Sean had seen half the men he’d watched start as snot-nosed dumbasses taken out one by one, clearing the way for Conor’s fucking grandson to make his play for power.

Those kids who’d run lookout gigs and then moved on to guard duty or work with the cargo coming in... one by one those kids-turned-adults, with families of their own, had been removed from the picture. Fifteen, all told, a bloodbath stretched out over six months - sixteen, of course, if you count how Paul’s murder went all wrong.

The one comfort had been watching Conor’s grandson lay the groundwork for his own comeuppance the whole time - promising favors for loyalty and then killing the ones he’d promised those favors to. That’s no way to start yourself as leader, and... well.

Trash had been taken out, in the end. Riley Higgs had gotten rid of the poison - and the poison’s friends - and his crew’s a damn sight better than Conor’s grandson’s people had been.

Riley, for one thing, understands that an organization like the Garden works, in the end, on trust. On being a family.

Don’t kill your family without a good damn reason, now do you?

Now Riley... he had a good reason. And Sean had made sure Riley Higgs knew a few very important facts that kept him on the man’s good side, and very much alive when the dust settled.

Even if he had did have to live with a bum knee. And back. And his hip’s started twinging every time it rains...

"Morning, Mr. Malley!" His favorite barista calls out, giving him a wave from behind the counter. She's a pretty thing, just cute as a button. Probably in her late twenties but when you’re as old as Sean is, everyone looks like a child playing pretend.

Still, it always brings a bit of sun in the old man's day to see her bright pink hair before he ever takes his seat. He always tells her she should move on from here, do something with her life other than serve old men their coffee and watch them while away the hours.

But I like it here, Melody always replies, giving a little shrug of her shoulders. I like our regulars, too. Besides, this place pays better than the job I’d get with my actual degree.

"G'morning to you, Melody!" He calls back, moving to have a seat in his usual spot, sinking gratefully into the plush armchair by the bookshelf in the corner. His favorite coffee table book, a heavy thing full of photos of World War II, is already laid out on the side table next to it, bookmarked where he’d left off last week. "Busy day, today?"

Melody is already heading his way, coffee in hand just how he likes it, one of Christa’s Cannolis on a small plate in the other. Sean’s doctor has been on him about cutting out sugar, and he’s done it just about everywhere else, but he still has his cannoli on Tuesdays. Christa had been so proud of herself when she’d mastered that recipe...

"Not really,” Melody says with a shrug, breaking into his thoughts. “Just the usual morning rush and a couple college kids, wandered outside but they left their drinks, I figure they’ll come back. One of 'em looks like he got mauled by a real weak bear."

Sean feigns surprise. "Oh, does he now?" He takes a sip of his coffee and sighs happily. "Not too hot. You had it out already, didn't you?"

"I saw your car pull into the lot," Melody says, giving a little it's nothing gesture. “I knew you’d be in, so I kept an eye out for you.”

"You're a doll, Melody, and this place would be lost without you." He presses the twenty-dollar bill into her hand, and when she protests, he shakes his head, adds another ten, and closes her hand firmly around the cash. "Take it, take it. I'm an old man on my own, who've I got to spend it on, huh?"

"You're not that old, Mr. Malley," Melody sighs, an old song and dance between them. “You’ve got grandkids who could use it, too, you know.”

"Ha! Trust that my grandkids never want for anything, Melody. Besides, live the life I've lived, and sixty feels like eighty-two. Go on, then. Cilly'll be along in a bit."

He sits back to drink his coffee as she heads back behind the counter, watching through the front window the cars that pass along the highway, the scattering of people getting in and out of their own vehicles in the parking lot. It's a perfect, and perfectly normal, Tuesday morning. Just like any other.

A perfectly normal Tuesday where one creature of habit makes it a point to get a quick look at another.

A flash of red catches his eye, and he frowns, watching a bright red Northern cardinal alight on the bench placed outside the shop, preening one wing briefly and then seeming to look towards the lot.

Sean follows its gaze, silently chastising himself for being so utterly taken by a simple bird, but... Northern cardinals are more or less unheard of around here, especially in the city. This one seems to cock its head in his direction.

"Someone," He mutters to himself, "is a bit lost."

There's a peal of laughter, as the door opens, the little bell on top chiming to announce them, and there they are.

Two young people walking inside, heads tilted together. One of them has thick, wavy black hair, one of those haircuts the younger people like so much now, shaved on the sides but long on top. The younger guys in the Family wear their hair like that now and then.

Sean thinks he liked it better when everyone kept things neat and tidy, but times change, and the Garden can't stagnate just because an old timer's got opinions. Riley’s take is he’d rather is people look like they could be anybody anywhere, and Sean has to admit the kind of haircut he’d like to see would stick out like a sore thumb.

Both of them are wearing all black head to toe, the black-haired one in a tank top and baggy pants, a large yellow lightning bolt on a cord settled just below their collarbone. Honestly, if he gets past the hair thing, they’re cute as a button, too.

Really, though, he’s not here because of them.

He’s here to get a good look at the young man walking in beside them.

It’s funny - it’s been nine - ten? - years since he last saw Paul Higgs alive, the day before he and his sweet Ronnie were gunned down in their own home in the night... but tears still prick at the corners of Sean’s eyes when he see the ghost of Paul in his son’s narrow face.

There’d been a joke when the little one first came into the world, that somehow Paul and Ronnie had put together a child where her genetics simply skipped out entirely. He’d been a little clone of Paulie from the start, and he’s different as a man than he’d been as a child lining toy cars up at their feet in the warehouse on Saturdays when Ronnie needed a break.

Sean pulls his phone out, idly scrolling - his daughter had helped him to get Facebook and a couple other things besides, including some kind of app that had his favorite card games. He pretends now to be fascinated by something he sees, but in truth he pulls his camera up and starts recording.

“It, it, it could change everything,” Paulie’s boy is saying, breathlessly excited, hands moving through the air in a blend of gesture and general happiness. “You see? Everything! Make it, it, it-it safer, make... make things better.”

“I know, I know,” The other one replies, deep voice warm and thick with love, and Sean sighs, missing his Christa now more than ever. He consoles himself with a bite of cannoli. “I already told you I’m in, Chris, okay? I’m going to help you. You don’t have to sell me on it.”

Tristan ducks his head with a shy smile, and boy if he isn’t Paul’s spitting image in that, too. Paulie hadn’t smiled much, not like his kid does - maybe that’s what he got from Ronnie - but in a smile like that, well... you could see where he got it from. If you’d known Paul, of course.

Which the kid didn’t, not anymore.

“It could, um, be dangerous though.” They’re barely audible now as they go back to where they left their still-steaming drinks, sitting down on a nearby couch. “Nat’s worried. And, and, and you know Jake-”

“Chris, you could walk across a crosswalk when the light starts blinking and Jake would still worry about you,” The other one teases. Sean knows their name, but right now it won’t quite come to mind, lingering on the tip of is tongue, never quite landing. “It’ll be public, yeah-”

“Telling everyone who... who, who I am.” Tristan starts tapping his fingers on his pants, a peculiar finger-twist-tap-tap-tap gesture that Sean once knew as well as anyone, when the boy was small. But it’s the words, with a hint of nervousness lining them, that get his attention. “The... the whole world’s going to, to, to to-to-... to... to know about Tristan Higgs.”

Now that gets Sean’s attention. He cuts the video, sends it to Riley, and starts a new one. It takes work not to sit up, or drop his cannoli, or in some other way give himself away.

He knows, then?

How?

Sean looks down at his phone, looking over the scar on Paul’s boy’s forehead, the only remaining evidence of what had been much more visible the first couple times they’d seen him out after it happened. Sean and Cilly had figured maybe a fight - people get into them, really. Paul wasn’t exactly gentle as a lamb, and why would his boy be?

But now... he wondered. His instincts told him the two were related, and of course he knew from the time they’d worked with WRU pretty closely under the table that those memory things they did sometimes failed. Sean had done a fixer job once for someone whose pet had recovered memories too fast and killed a servant in a panic...

“Oh, Paul,” Sean murmurs. “What’d your boy do, hm?”

“I’m, I’m going to to to t-... to tell everyone who I am,” Paul’s boy is saying, leaning forward and taking the hands of the other one in his own, squeezing them tight. “I’m... will, will, will you come with me? When, when I... so someone’s there?”

“What? Holy shit, Chris, go to the Olympics? With you?” They inhale and exhale, blowing some hair from their eyes, and smile. “You should take someone who knows more than I do about all that stuff, Chris, take Jake, or-”

“Jake has has to stay here. To, to protect the house. But... will you come with me?”

Sean cuts the video, sends it to Riley, and this time adds a message.

Olympics are in Chicago this year. What’s Paul Jr. planning?

He feels eyes on him and glances up to find Tristan looking over at him, an expression of uncertainty on his face. Sean’s been watching him for years, popping up in places, the way you sometimes see the same faces at the corner store, the mom-and-pop, a coffeeshop like this one. Now, he watches Tristan look him over, knowing he’s familiar but not knowing why. Part of him, with a pinprick of an old, old grief, wishes Paul’s little boy would recognize him now.

Most of him knows it’s better if he doesn’t.

Tristan looks away, and goes back to talking, but his voice lowers and now Sean can’t quite pick up what he’s saying beyond a few scattered words. He gets a couple photos of the lovebirds with their head together, sipping coffee, and sends those on to Riley, too.

Job done, he settles back to finish his cannoli and drink his coffee. Tristan and-... Laken, his name suddenly supplies, only an hour after he’d started trying to remember it - get up and leave, Tristan’s arm around Laken’s waist.

Good for the kid, Sean thinks, with a smile. By this age Paul had an elementary school son running around, but you know, it’s good to take your time on these things, and it’s nice to see that all the shit they’ve had to stand back and watch still wraps up nicely into Paul’s boy living a pretty nice life indeed.

His phone dings just as Cilly enters - right on time at 10, like clockwork - and he glances down to open the message from Riley.

I’ll get one of our guys to look into it. This might give us the out on the business I don’t want to be in I’ve been looking for. Kid looks good, looks like Paul. Family genes run deep.

Sean greets Cilly, even older than him but a sight more spry, and glances out the window. The bird’s gone from the bench, of course. The day is bright and shining.

In Laken’s car, they’re halfway back to the house Laken shares with their roommates when Chris suddenly sits straight up. “Mr. Malley,” He breathes out, green eyes widening.

Laken jumps - he’d been silent, preoccupied and in thought - and nearly jerks the car into a curb. “Damn, Chris! You scared me. What’d you say?”

“The old guy, in, in, in the the the the-the-... the coffeeshop, who kept looking at, at me.” Chris rocks forward, hands on the dashboard, his eyes staring ahead but not at the road, they’re looking far ahead... or behind himself, back in time and not space, when and not where. “His name’s Mr. Malley. I, I, I knew-... my dad knew, my, my, my dad, my dad-”

He winces, the headache splitting him apart, and Laken hits their turn signal, pulling into the parking lot of a generic fast food place, swinging into a parking space and turning to look at him.

“Chris? You okay?”

Chris’s face has gone pale, cold sweat breaking out. It still happens, sometimes, and when they lean over to touch his shoulder he flinches back from them, instinctively.

Laken exhales. “Okay. Ride it out, Chris. Let the memory go if it’s hurting, it’ll come back to you. They all come back now.”

“No! No, I, I, I want-... Mr. Malley knew my dad, I went to-... work, with, with him sometimes, his his his wife babysat me, I... I know him. I knew him. I knew-” He turns to look at them, and they fight the urge to try and touch him again.

Not yet.

“Do you... do you think, think, think he knew me?”

Laken swallows. “I don’t think so. Wouldn’t he have said something, if he recognized you? If he was your dad’s friend? Are you absolutely sure that-”

“Yes, I’m, I’m sure. I know it was him. I, I, I know, he, he, he gave me me me Dinotopia books... for Christmas one year...” Chris jerked in a breath and let it out again, hands going up over his head, folding himself in half until his forehead rested on the dashboard, pressed to the cool molded plastic. “He, he, he, he came to their funeral, he hugged me, he said, you’re too young to to to to have to lose so much, and everyone said-... everyone said stuff I hated but but but not him, he said, he said-”

“Chris, please, don’t hurt yourself doing this-”

“He said grief gets worse before it gets better, and and and and he said-... he said... he said don’t let anyone tell you that R-Ronnie’d want you to to to be strong, she’d want you to scream your head off if you want to, your dad’d be proud if if if if-if... if you told us all to go to hell, and... and and and and it felt like he was the only person who who who knew them at all that day, everyone said, said, said stupid things but not him, not-... not him and not Mr. Cilly, not-... not my Aunt Jo, not anybody, but he-”

Chris chokes on a sob and when Laken throws their arms around him he melts into it this time, crying against their shoulder, the two of them uncomfortably arched over the center console and the gear shift.

“It’s okay,” Laken whispers, running their fingers over the slowly growing fuzz of his hair. “It’s okay. Let it ride, Chris. It’s okay.”

“He, he, he was my dad’s b-b-best friend-... Why d-didn’t he, if he saw me, why wouldn’t he-... I s-see him all th-the the the time, why doesn’t he know who I am?”

“Maybe he’s like Akio,” Laken says, and feels him trembling under their touch. “Maybe he’s always thought you were dead.”

“I w-was,” Chris whispers “When I, I, I was Baldur. When I was training. When... when I... was good. I was dead.”

“Chris-”

“I was dead,” Chris says, and they kiss his head, helpless to think of anything else to do. “When my p-parents died, I died, too. Mr. Malley made m-me feel like I I I wasn’t. Why didn’t he kn-know me? Why didn’t a-anyone know I was alive?”

“I don’t know, baby. I don’t know.”

“Hurts,” Chris whispers. “Why, why, why didn’t anyone help me before she she she-... before I was-... why didn’t anyone help me?”

Laken’s own eyes burn, and they draw circles on his scalp with their fingertips. “I can’t answer that,” They say, low and soft. “I’m sorry. But you know you have people who can and will help you now.”

For a while, Chris’s only sounds are sobs, and Laken can only make soft soothing nonsense noises and feel like shit that it’s not enough.

“Ev, everyone knew she-she hated me,” Chris whimpers, and sounds younger than he ever has, and Laken wants to throw a punch or scream and they can’t do either, only sit in the car and glare at people who look in as they walk past. “Everyone.”

“Chris-”

“Everyone knew, why, why, why why why didn’t they stop her?”

Back in the coffeeshop, Sean and Cilly are in the midst of an argument about a baseball game that happened 30 years ago when his phone rings. He holds up one finger and picks it up, lifting it to his ear.

“I have a job for you,” Riley says, with his cheerful hint of brogue. Funny, to remember that this part of the family only came here a few decades ago. “It’s a job I know you’ll enjoy.”

“Watching Paul’s boy is my retirement gig,” Sean says amicably. “You know I don’t do the dangerous stuff any longer, Mr. Higgs.”

There’s a silence. “I’m going to do some looking into what you sent me. But in the meantime I need to give you a job, and you’re going to do it.”

“And why is that, Mr. Higgs?”

“Because you’re going to want to do this.”

“What is it, then?”

Another pause.

“I want you to find Joanne Botham.”

Sean thinks of the dour, angry woman who had ignored Tristan in his funeral suit, gathering mourners around her while she sobbed over Ronnie’s loss, Ronnie’s own son alone on a couch staring off into space until Sean himself had sat down and told him, don’t let ‘em say your mom’d be proud of you bein’ stoic today, kiddo. Ronnie’d want you to scream if you felt the urge.

The kid had looked at him like he’d been given water in the desert, a starving man offered a bowlful of broth. Mr. Malley?

People will say a lot of real stupid stuff to you today, Sean had said. His eyes had gone to Joanne Botham, and Ronnie’s sister’s icy glare when she looked at her own nephew had made his blood run cold with anger even then. Likely in the future, too. But you just remember Paul and Ronnie weren’t saints. And they’d never want you to be, either. I’m sorry for your loss, Tris. No one on God’s earth has loved their kid like yours loved you. Should’ve seen his face when he told us your mom was pregnant with you. Could’ve lit the world with all the sunshine there.

A clap on the back, a whispered thank you, and that had been the last day Sean Malley had ever seen Tristan Higgs alive.

Until, of course, Riley had told him there was a boy living in a pet liberation safehouse who looked remarkably like Paul. Until, of course, Riley had shared that he’d known Tristan Higgs was alive all along. Until, of course, Sean had been told he couldn’t make a move because WRU was protecting all the players who had stolen his friend’s kid.

Until... now.

“Mr. Higgs?” His voice drops, and Cilly sits up, alarmed at the sudden change in tone.

“You heard me. Find Joanne Botham. I have a feeling we are about to get the opportunity we’ve been waiting for.”

The phone goes dead on the other end, and Sean slowly sets it down, finishing his second cup of coffee in a gulp. Then he looks at Cilly, and starts to smile.

“Riley’s got work for us,” He says, and when Cilly’s eyebrows raise he doesn’t wait for him to ask for more. “Don’t worry. You’re going to like it. Finally get to do what we should have done ten fucking years ago.”

---

Tagging: @burtlederp , @finder-of-rings , @endless-whump , @whumpfigure , @astrobly @newandfiguringitout , @doveotions , @pretty-face-breaker , @gonna-feel-that-tomorrow @boxboysandotherwhump , @oops-its-whump @cubeswhump , @whump-tr0pes @downriver914 @vickytokio @whumpiary @orchidscript @moose-teeth @nonsensical-whump

#whump #speak out arc #chris the strawberry blond romantic #emotional whump #grief tw #referenced parental death #referenced past whump of a minor #referenced murder #memory loss #memory recovery #recovering whumpee #caretaker and whumpee #hi made myself cry during chris's part towards the end wheeeee

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catboyshinsou · 4 years

Text

jazz from heaven

pairing: aizawa x gn!reader

warnings: stress mention, panic attack mention, crying

word count: 1800

summary: after a stressful week, reader drives to aizawa’s apartment at 2am for comfort

Footsteps echoed in the never ending staircase, mocking you for your late night visit. Quick, shaky breaths left you as you reached the top floor. You had always hated the position of his apartment, in the middle of the city and on the top floor. It made going in and out easier for hero work since he could use the roof to enter and leave without making too much of a fuss. After climbing the mountain of stairs that was understandable but in this very moment, you hated that he lived here with every fiber of your being.

It was a quiet saturday morning. For once the streets were empty, even the high end villains would be sleeping by now. Everyone was asleep but you. You had made your way to your boyfriend's apartment at 3am and hoped for the love of everything that's holy that he was awake.

Of course as a teacher and pro, he was bound to be awake to grade or just coming back from patrol. It was the weekend of course and you'd normally hope

he was getting some rest but now you needed him awake. Just awake enough to give you a hug.

You knocked on the door, the sounds echoing in the halls. One, two, three.

You chewed on your lip and pulled on your fingers while you waited for an answer. Maybe it was too quiet? Maybe he was sleeping?

With a knot in your throat, you stood in front of the wood door, sniffing quietly. The week had been rough, today being the worst it's been in a while. You hadn't seen Shouta in a week. UA gave him more work than he usually had, especially since he was a homeroom teacher again. Of course you guys had kept in touch through texts and calls but right now you needed the real thing. You didn't want to be the clingy s/o, even if you've wanted to come by every day this week.

On Monday, when customers had yelled at you all day long you just wanted to sink into his arms.

On Tuesday, when weird guys chatted you up on the street and didn't leave until you dared to call someone.

On Wednesday, when you met old friends and they pointed out how much happier you seemed back in the day and how much you've lost your smile.

On Thursday, when you overthought yourself into an extensive panic attack in your bedroom.

Friday had been the worst. You almost immediately started bawling once you got home from an extra shift at work, barely being able to hold yourself for a couple of hours until the tears stopped. The next thing you could remember was being on your way to his place.

Your phone lit up the dark corridor, blue light shining onto your face. 'hey, it's me at your door’

Footsteps approached, dragging themselves over the wood floor. After a few seconds of unlocking the rather old door, Shouta opened and gave you an unamused look.

“It’s 2am, y/n.”

He had a towel throw over his shoulders, his damp hair falling on it. The usual hero jumpsuit was nowhere to be seen, his pink sweatpants instantly catching your eye. Paired with a washed out and too big shirt, he looked about bed ready even if you knew he wouldn’t be sleeping for another hour or two. Warm air came from behind him, you smelling the shampoo Mic had recommended him a few weeks ago.

“I know… I’m sorry…” You breathed out while walking into his apartment. Your eyes glued to the floor, a shaky breath escaped you as you took off your shoes.

The pro’s eyes softened. His confusion turned into concern, reminding himself that your late night visits usually had a reason.

You stood back up and took another deep breath. Guilt washed over you when you remembered that you showed up at Shouta’s door at 2am, when he was probably exhausted and just wanted to go to bed. Your cheeks burned as he walked past you into the living room, one of the only light sources except from the bathroom behind you.

Shouta had just gotten done with the last grades, the pile of graded papers neatly next to his mug of tea and all of his work stuff. He wanted to finish school stuff up, even if patrol had worn him out, so that he could completely relax on the upcoming weekend.

“Sorry for not calling more, I’ve been really busy with school…” He walked past you and put away the stacks of paperwork, so that the cat didn’t have her fun with them if she came home overnight. “Kids can be such a pain, I don’t know why I agreed to be a homeroom teacher.”

A few cars passed by, slow jazz coming from another apartment. It was a faint sound but just enough to push you to the edge. Lights flickered when you took another step into the apartment, as if you had just disrupted its peace.

He huffed as he turned off the lights and got back to you. You who was still awkwardly standing in the corridor as if this was your first time at his place. You pulled on your fingers and just watched him put his stuff away.

“Everything okay?” He stood in front of you now, a hand on your cheek and soft eyes looking into yours. Even if he wasn’t the most expressive with his own emotions, he had mastered yours. Something was wrong, even if you probably didn’t want to think about it. You probably still would either today or tomorrow but he didn’t want to inquire more.

With a gentle tug, he pulled you into his arms and pressed you close to him. His warmth surrounded you while he patted your head. Tears streamed down your face, silent sobs escaping you. You started shaking as the sobs got more violent, Shouta just holding you and stroking your back.

“Oh, y/n…”

The tears soaked into his black t-shirt, your arms wrapped around him as you heaped. Keeping your low as low as possible, it was still 2am after all, you felt his steady breath against you. It made you feel safe, as if nothing could happen to you anymore.

Shouta didn’t know why you showed up to cry. But after working with a lot of different people, including teenagers and kids, he knew that this wasn’t the appropriate time to ask. What you needed was a no judgement zone and comfort.

With the last tears flowing, you started regulating your breath again. Your boyfriend noticed your deepening breaths, holding you even closer.

“That’s right, just deep breaths…” With a low whisper, he gave you kisses on your forehead as you did just that.

You sniffed and took a shaky breath as you buried your face in his shoulder. With a tightened grip on him, you just took him in and waited for the uneasy feeling to leave your system. You still trembled, trying to hold back the tears that dared to spill again. It was enough crying for today. In fact, you had cried enough for a lifetime this past week. Shouta was probably exhausted too, he didn’t need more to worry about.

Of course, he noticed your struggle. If one of you pulled another closer, you would practically merge so he felt the way you trembled and how your breath still wasn’t regulated. In moments like these, he wished he could do more. Somehow make you realise that everything would be okay and you could let it out here without being a burden to him. But he could only hold you like this while reassuring you in every way he could.

“Do you want to go to bed? A tea before?”

You shook your head and let go of him. Your head banged and your eyes burned. With the collar of your shirt you wiped away the trail of tears on your cheeks, the fabric irritating your eyes even more.

“Let’s go to bed then…” He tugged you into his bedroom and opened his drawer to give you something warmer to sleep in.

The room was neater than you expected. How did he find the time to keep everything so tidy if he was barely home? His laundry was folded and stacked on his bed, the school stuff on his desk with his laptop. The only other mess here was his bed with half torn off sheets and different pillows and blankets all over. You smiled at his little chaos before plopping onto it.

“C’mon, wear that.” He tossed one of his sweaters at you, which you somehow caught before it landed in your face. “It’s gonna be getting colder.”

Without questioning him, you just changed into it. The fabric felt soft on your skin, you could tell it was fresh out of the machine. It smelt like fabric softener, the one that only he had because he ran his errands in those 24/7 shops after patrols and those were somehow the only ones that carried this brand. You couldn’t pinpoint what exactly it smelled like so it was just Shouta. One of those things you would always connect with him like cats and pink sweatpants.

You looked over at his desk, an extra picture frame of what you guessed was his new class on it. It was too far away for you to see the individual faces but they seemed like an interesting group already.

Shouta sighed and let himself fall next to you. “Wanna talk about what happened?”

With a deep breath you shook your head and rolled over to face him. Your head still ached, you couldn’t speak if you wanted to. Your throat hurt, the knot completely tying off your words.

He took you into his arms and pulled the blanket over your shoulders. “Want me to talk?”

You nodded into his chest and took another deep breath. This was what you had needed over the week. His presence, his touch, his voice. They were natural tranquilizers for you, reassurances that everything would be okay.

“Nezu gave me class 1-A, can you believe that?” His hands were on the nape of your neck, his thumb caressing behind your ear. “I had them do a fitness test on the first day… I watched them during the entrance exam and I just wasn’t fully convinced… Remember the kid I told you about that just got in through rescue points? And the one that only got in with villain points? Yeah, they’re both in my class and it’s more than obvious that they don’t get along well… They’ve all got interesting quirks, it’s a pretty colourful group and I’m... interested how they’re gonna train them...”

Both of you started getting sleepier with every word he said. He ended up slurring his words as he yawned before silence fell. There was still the jazz playing from somewhere outside, cars passing by occasionally. You hicked a few breaths but Shouta made sure to hold you closer and whisper reassuring words when you did.

“Can I stay here for the weekend?” You croaked right before falling asleep.

“You’re always welcome here, y/n…”

#bnha imagines #bnha writing #bnha x reader #aizawa shouta #aizawa x reader #aizawa imagine #aizawa fluff #aizawa x you #aizawa comfort #comfort fic #bnha comfort

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