#all my profits that don't go into bills are going into saving up for some medical work i need done
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bluestar22x · 2 days ago
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Same goes for not being married yet. Even if you do actually want to get married, it takes two for that. You can't get married if you have no one to ask or be asked by. And you can't force anyone to date you let alone marry you.
I get the still lives with their parents thing a lot and the marriage thing, that's why I added it. But I went to college, the job didn't work out and my current job isn't enough to pay most available rents (note that my college job paid even LESS than my current one so don't think college degree means money - employees at McDonalds get more money per hour ($2.75 more in fact) than I got from a job needing a bachelor's degree).
Ok, I could go on my own and pay rent, I want to someday, but the only rents I see available right now are either trash or would suck up all my money and I'd have nothing in my savings, no back up for medical bills, etc. It's a lot easier to survive when you don't have to worry about rent. I can pay everything else and I have some side money to actually enjoy my life and take a vacation here and there. And my parents get help around the house in return.
If I had maybe 3 more dollars an hour I wouldn't worry about rent costs and be so picky (please, give me a raise, I'm begging!), but I am at least $300 short a month for the half decent rents to be affordable (and why should I live in a rat infested rental when I can live in a clean house my parents willingly offered?). Rents aren't supposed to take up over 60% of your monthly salary. It's not sustainable. Yet so many low income people are forced to rent these old places that are like $1,000 a month or more and I don't even know how they are up to code. They are in rough shape and ready to catch fire (so many apartment fires in town because the rents and their electrical wiring are ancient - and even getting new electrical wiring doesn't seem to stop these electrical fires from occurring - which has made me paranoid about anything built before 2000). They pay rent then can't afford hardly anything else, even other essentials. Then their unit burns down and they lose everything. Including their cats.
Either decent rents need to be $600 a month max or salaries have to increase by a few dollars or so (I'd say the trouble is more with salaries - house ownership costs is not all that better than rental costs - but if you raise salaries small businesses will close and large ones will just cut employees - because the large ones are only concerned with maximizing profits and small businesses are barely hanging on).
Can we stop using "still lives with their parents" or "unemployed" or "doesn't have a drivers license" or "didn't graduate high school" as an insult or evidence that someone is a bad person? Struggling with independence or meeting milestones is not a moral failing.
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vurelly · 2 years ago
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Well, I'm back and the shop's re-opened! All stickers are up, all keychains are for sale again, and the watercolor prints are available for sale again!
This blog's certainly gone way past just my artwork and i certainly advertise more for my shop now than I post art, but running my shop leaves me with the same feeling of satisfaction now that posting art does, so I'm having fun with it.
Per usual, everything is up for pre-order in my shop here!
Btw, my manufacturer did accidentally send me three extra Sun keychains on accident so if you manage to snag one of them your order should be sent out this month rather than next!
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scarletwinterxx · 1 year ago
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but i loved you harder - jaehyun scenario
hello ~ so this one is a request and coincidentally i was writing something for Jaehyun. I too am deep in my Yuno feels (i don't think ever recovered honestly😂) hope you like it!!!
if you have a request or scenario you want me to do, just send me a message I'll see what I can do😊💌
For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.
All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.
(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)
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"Dude, I said no. She'll be so mad at me if I do"
"It's for our funds" Johnny insists
"But-"
"No buts, once we reach like $100 I swear I'll cut the line. I have faith in you"
At this point Jaehyun can't say anything that would stop Johnny. He's thinking about bringing in his last card but he'll save it for the last minute so for now he says yes.
Come the day of the festival, word got around that Jaehyun was going to do the date booth so ofcourse the line was long by the time he arrived there. Johnny right in front calling even more students to join while Haechan stands beside him collecting payments.
"Oh here's our star of the day. Okay so who's up first?" Johnny was answered with tens, maybe 20 or more screams from the crowd. Jaehyun shoots a shy smile before going behind the booth.
It's only the fifth girl before he heard the shouting from somewhere in the back.
"JOHNNY J. SUH I SWEAR TO GOD YOU BETTER RUN" Jaehyun hears you before he could see you. He then looks at Johnny, seeing the nervous look on his face and an even more scared Haechan beside him.
"You're on your own, hyung" Haechan mumbles, hiding behind the 6 foot tall guy.
The girls at the very front and the one Jaehyun was just talking to turns their heads towards you, seeing what the commotion is all about.
"What the heck is this?" you ask, eyes blazing.
"A booth"
You stare down the guy taller than you, giving him a chance to change his answer. "Oh come on, it's for our frat funds. And Jaehyun said yes" Johnny says
"Well" Jaehyun interferes making the three of you look over at him, Johnny shoots him a look while you glare at him. He knows the anger isn't really directed towards him, but you can be very scary when you want to be.
"I doubt that, this whole thing has yours and yours name written all over it" you point at the double AA and triple AAA brothers
"How much do you need to raise?" you ask "Like hundred dollars" Haechan answers
You pull something from your back pocket, a crisp hundred bill before putting it inside the jar Haechan was holding.
"There, done. Show's over people. You, let's go"
"Yes ma'am" Jaehyun gets up from his seat, not needing to be told twice. Following behind you.
When you were a few booths away, he catches up with you. Pulling you back by you arm.
"You're not really mad at me, are you?" he asks
"Depends"
"Hey, I swear I told Johnny no. I was gonna tell you about it but honestly I just wanted to watch you rip at him" he tells you with a smile, his dimples showing.
Just like that you feel some of the annoyance and anger melting away. When you don't say anything back, Jaehyun takes this chance to step closer to you. Holding both of your hands in his.
"Don't be mad, please?"
You roll your eyes at him, all is forgiven already.
"I'll buy you ice cream?"
"WIth two scoops?"
He smiles, intertwining your fingers together before leading you towards the ice cream stand. "Two scoops of cookie dough with extra chocolate drizzle just for you"
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"You can't still be mad at me"
Currently you, Jaehyun and Johnny are sitting outside a cafe just to hang out. Even though Johnny gives you headaches half of the time, he is a very good friend of yours.
"You'll be surprised with how long I can hold a grudge" you answer back
"I gave your boyfriend back"
"Exactly, he's mine so stop using him for profits" you bite back, Jaehyun listens quietly beside you. His arm resting behind your chair.
"We got that pingpong table from the car wash benefit we did last summer, we're trying to get a pinball machine next" Johnny says
You do remember that frat event. You've never seen so many girls and some guys line up for a carwash done by a bunch of frat boys. Yuta definitely put on a show, Jungwoo also had fun being the adrenaline junkie that he is following whatever Yuta was doing. Mark and Jeno were more shy about it but had one of the longest line.
And Jaehyun, well safe to say you made him wash your car a few times until the line behind you got tired of waiting for their turn. You were debating whether to cut their water supply line but you know Taeyong would scold you so you didn't.
"Go find someone else" you grumble
"Okay then let me ask you, let's say you're in a cafe inside with another friend and this other friend got cold. Jaehyun's the only one who got a jacket, is it okay if he lends her his jacket?" he asks you,
Jaehyun smirks from beside you, waiting for your answer.
"Do you enjoy having your head attached to your neck?" you ask Johnny
"Come on, will you?"
"Of course not! Did your mom not raise you to always bring a jacket in case it gets cold?" you sassily ask back
"I don't see you bringing a jacket around" Johnny counters
"That's cause I have a Jaehyun. She can get her own boyfriend to borrow her jacket from, but until then have fun being a human popsicle"
Jaehyun smiles, his hand absentminded drawing circles on your back as he listens to you.
It's endearing to him really. To some it might sound like you're too much, too jealous, maybe even insecure but Jaehyun knows it's the opposite. And if he's being honest, he's way worse than you. If sees a guy even looking at you for a second too long he's right behind you hovering, a silent warning to back off.
When in public together, if he's not holding you he'll always be a step away. At parties he would be attached at the hip with you, even going to the bathroom to guard the door for you.
If positions were switched he'd be livid too if he sees you in a dating booth smiling at a random dude. Only he can make you smile, only he can make you blush and laugh and moan.
Shaking his thoughts away, he looks over at you still arguing with Johnny. Noticing the breeze got a bit colder since the sun is setting, he shrugs his jacket off to put it around you
"Oh my god, I cannot with you two" Johnny says as he watches the two of you. Slipping your arms through the sleeves, immediately smelling Jaehyun's perfume around you.
"Like I said, I have a Jaehyun"
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It's finally the end of a long week, you invited Jaehyun over your place to cook dinner and have an indoor date to end your week together.
The two of you love cooking together, when you first started dating you used to cook for him and bring him packed lunches. Then one time he invited you over to cook dinner for you. At some point cooking became part of date night and it's now one of your favorite things to do with him.
While Jaehyun stirs the noodles on the pan, he feels you hug him from behind. You stand on your tiptoe to kiss him on the jaw, earning a smile from your boyfriend.
When it's just the two of you, you're more clingy towards him. In contrast with your strong personality around his friends, you're more soft spoken and gentle when it's just him around.
"Your birthday is coming up, what do you want to do?" you ask him
"Do you want to go on a date? It's valentines"
You shook your head, stepping to the side to look at him. Jaehyun peaks down at you, "You don't want to go out?"
"If that's what you want, we can celebrate valentines some other day. I want to celebrate your birthday" you tell him.
Jaehyun smiles at you, rubbing his nose against yours before giving your lips a quick peck. He can't get too distracted since he's still cooking. He burnt something before when the two of you forgot about the ramen you were cooking and got busy making out on the kitchen counter.
In his defense he craved you more than the ramen.
"Well if that's the case. What I want for my birthday is to go on a date with my favorite girl"
You smile at him, "Anywhere or is there somewhere you want to go to?"
"Can I plan it?"
"But it's your birthday"
"And I really want to take you out on a date, give me your day and consider that the best gift you could give me"
You look at him, he looks back at you waiting for you to fold. When you roll your eyes at him he knew he won.
"Fine but I'm getting you another gift, you can't say no!"
The two of you enjoy dinner, cleaning up afterwards before putting on a movie you're not really going to watch.
You'll give it to him, a record time of 4 minutes after the movie starts before he pulled you on his lap to kiss you breathless.
"That's a record" you mumble when the two of you broke apart to catch your breath
"What?" he asked, still dazed
"You made it past the opening credits" you giggle, tangling your hands behind his neck to pull him closer to you until he's a breath away.
"I was trying to see if you really wanted to watch the movie" he smirks, holding your hips down against his
"Liar, you would've distracted me whether I wanted to watch it or not"
"Okay you got me there, but what can I do. I just want to kiss my girlfriend all night and all over. Am I not allowed to do that?" He smiles before capturing your lips again, then he's leaving a trail of kisses along your skin. From your lips to your cheeks to your jaw down your neck. His hands now under your shirt to grip your waist.
"Yuno Jeong, believe me when I say this you are allowed to do all of that to me whatever it is you have in mind right now"
"You, you're all that is in my mind right now"
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ironstrange1991 · 1 year ago
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Just As Good As I knew It Would Be
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Pairing: Defender!Strange x SexWorker!Reader
Synopsis: It was supposed to be just another night with a new client, but Defender Strange was unlike any other and he definitely had other plans.
Word Count: 10k
Warnings: Descriptions of sex work, one or two use of the word 'whore', hickeys and lovebites, oral sex with male and female receiving, protected p n v sex.
A/N: This was planned to be a one shot, but I can easily see this story continuing, so it's up to you guys. Also, I was literary falling asleep over my laptop when I posted this so any typos or grammar errors I will fix tomorrow.
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When the weight of his body left you and rolled to the side on the bed, you sighed in relief and also turned to the side, taking a cigarette from the package on the bedside table, lighting it and taking a long drag. It was still one o'clock in the morning and you had a client scheduled for 2:30 and before that you needed a long shower to get rid of all the sweat stuck to your skin.
He was a nice guy, plenty of money to spend since he paid for an hour with you almost every week. He was lonely and with the sweat problem you could understand why. You just couldn't remember his name. Andrew? No, Andrew was the one from last night. Nice guy, a little clingy but nice. Would it then be William? Fuck, it didn't matter anyway, you never called them by their names for that very reason.
Madam Elise always said that there was no other way to permanently lose a client than to call them by the wrong name. It's easier to call them all by the same pet name, she always says, and that's what you do. They were all Baby, for you. And they liked it very much.
"I would like you to stay the night with me." He murmured stroking your arm. "I like to think I'm more than just a client to you."
And didn't all of them like to think that way? You had to stop yourself from rolling your eyes and took another drag from your cigarette.
"You're too good for this job. I can give you the stability you need..."
"Okay, baby, let's get one thing straight once and for all." You interrupted him, putting out your cigarette in the ashtray and getting up. "I'm not interested in a relationship. Certainly not with one of my clients. And I don't need a man to save me from the life I live because, surprise! I like this life.”
He remained silent, watching as you got dressed and when you finished putting on your shoes he stood up, took out his wallet and took out a few hundred bills.
"Baby, I don't deal with money. I thought you had paid at the club."
He nodded "I did. This is extra."
You smirked, taking the money and putting it inside your bag. "You spoil me."
He smiled. "You deserve it, Y/n. When will we see each other again?"
"Madam Elise takes care of my schedule. But from what I know, it's full until next weekend."
He seemed extremely disappointed.
"But I'm sure she can fit you in some night for an extra fee."
"Money is not a problem." He stated cupping your cheek and threatening to kiss you, but you were quick to pull away from him.
"Then I'll see you next week. Take care."
"My driver will take you back to the club." He informed.
"Thanks, baby. Have a good night."
...
Madam Elise was busy taking care of the Absinthe's accounting after the doors closed. It was already past 3am and the girls were leaving. The night had been very profitable, everything had gone normally, without any mishaps and the girls seemed happy.
Throughout her life, Madam Elise worked at night and with her own effort founded the Absinthe Nightclub, which today has the status of the largest and most renowned nightclub in New York City. No less than 25 girls, 12 dancers, 3 singers, and an entire band worked for her, not counting the waiters, bartenders, security guards, secretaries, suppliers and everything else. It was a big business that she commanded with mastery and love.
However, that night, she was tired and could hardly wait to finally leave the place and go home. She was closing the register when Aline, her personal secretary who helps her take care of the girls' schedules, came to her excitedly.
"You won't believe who called asking for Y/n."
"Whoever it is, her schedule is full until the end of next week." Madam Elise answered nonchalantly, but Aline didn't seem any less excited and handed over a sheet of paper with a name and telephone number written on it.
"That's what I told him, but he didn't seem to mind waiting. He asked us to come back with an all-night date."
"A whole night?" Madam Elise asked surprised. "Does he know her price?"
"He mentioned that money is not a problem." Aline responded, smiling as if just talking to the man had already turned her his biggest fan.
"Why Y/n? Did he ask for her specifically or did you recommend her?"
Aline shook her head "He asked for her and only her. It must have been someone else’s recommendation."
"I highly doubt it." That was all Madam Elise responded to Aline's speculation. "Call him tomorrow, schedule him for the night."
Aline looked at her as if she had said the most absurd thing. "Should I reschedule everyone else? They won't be happy."
"No, but they will accept it. Y/n has already captivated them for life. Now a new client like this one..." She stared at the name scribbled on the sheet of paper. "This is a customer we still need to captivate."
Aline nodded, but continued standing there as if she wanted to ask or say something.
"What is it?" Madam Elise asked impatiently.
"Does madam think he will come here?"
"Don't be silly, of course not. A man like him has an image to maintain. She will go to him."
...
When you woke up the next day, the sun was coming in from behind the gaps in the heavy curtains in your room and it was already past 2PM. The routine of sleeping when it was almost dawn and waking up in the middle of the afternoon was the least rewarding part of the job, but it was something you had to get used to.
You had a very chaotic routine, but you couldn't think of another way to live. Your work has provided you with a beautiful apartment and all the luxury you could have dreamed of, and most importantly, freedom.
You didn't depend on anyone but yourself and contrary to what many might think, you didn't feel used. In fact most of the time you felt like a pop star, with men lining up to have a special appointment with you.
After taking a shower and spending a long time on skin care, you went down to have breakfast - which was actually always afternoon coffee - and took the opportunity to take a look at your schedule. There were two new customers you were excited to meet. One of them was a jazz singer, the other was a politician. A deputy, if you weren't mistaken.
"More coffee, ma'am?" Karen, your maid asked gently.
"Yes please."
Karen had been working for you for a little over a year. It was actually Madam Elise's idea for you to have someone to take care of the house and you, but you suspected that Karen also did a second job: spying on you for her. You would be eternally grateful for everything Madam Elise did for you, but sometimes the woman was too controlling and a little scary. Not that you cared, it wasn't like you had anything to hide.
"Karen, remind me again how you met Madame Elise." You asked, still looking through the names on your cell phone’s notepad and taking a bite of your toast.
"It's been so long, dear, I don't even remember exactly, but I think it was a few years a go when I worked at the nightclub" The old woman responded evasively.
"Hmm" You were sure the last time you asked she said they met each other at a job interview and not once she mentioned she worked at the Absinthe.
"Oh, I almost forgot it! Madam Elise called and asked you to call back as soon as you woke up. She said there were changes in your schedule for the night."
"No, come on! I was looking forward to meeting the deputy." You murmured, finishing your coffee and already calling her.
When you arrived at the Absinthe to get ready, it was already past 6PM and you still didn't know who the special client was that made Madam Elise cancel and reschedule everyone else. She refused to speak on the phone and emphasized that you should spend some extra time taking care of yourself because this client deserved the best.
So you took a bubble bath with some special bath salts, were extra careful with your skin care, using your best oils and creams. Your hair, which you had decided to leave loose and straight, you ended up wrapping in curlers and clips so that you could finish it when you arrived at the nightclub, as well as your makeup, which Madam Elise made a point of saying on the phone that she would do herself.
"I don't know why so much suspense." You said as she finished preparing your skin with foundation.
"You'll understand when you get there." She answered.
"How about this one?" Sofia, one of the new girls who worked with you asked, holding a hanger with a very short strapless red dress.
"No. Too much." Madam Elise replied.
"How about this other one?" Sofia asked showing off a long black dress with an extravagant slit.
"Too much, Sofia. What part of elegant and discreet don't you understand?" Madam Elise responded sharply.
"It would help if you say who the client is." Sofia complained.
"That's what I'm trying to find out." You said taking advantage of Sofia's complaint. "Oh, I got it, He is a rockstar, isn’t he? Don't tell me it's Bono!"
Sofia stared at Madam Elise, waiting for an answer.
“It's not Bono. And he's not a rockstar. He's better than that."
"How about this one?" Sofia showed off a rose midi dress that looked like something Kate Middleton would wear to one of her official events.
"Perfect!" Madame Elise exclaimed, finishing applying the third layer of mascara to your eyelashes.
"Please don't say it's the president. He's too old." You whimpered.
"Don't be silly, Y/n." That's all she replied.
"Older men make the best clients." Sofia reflected as she hung the dress on the chair next to you. "They are kind and don't usually last long. Not to mention they pay extras."
"Girl, You're learning fast!" You praised.
"Learning from the best." Sofia said giving you a wink and you two giggled.
"Perfect. Now let's let this hair down." Madam Elise said as she took the clips out of your hair and used a comb to straighten your curls. She finished with a setting spray and only then let you look in the mirror. The whole thing seemed too much to you, but you didnt say anything.
"Now finish getting dressed. A car is waiting for you outside. The driver knows where to drop you off."
"Yes ma'am."
Surprising you, Madam Elise leaned over and gave you a small kiss on the cheek in a rare display of affection.
"Good luck, my darling."
...
When the driver stopped in front of the old building, you couldn't help but think he had gotten the address wrong.
"Are you sure we're in the right place?"
"177A Bleecker Street. That's the exact address Madam Elise gave me. Do you want me to call her to check?"
You shook your head "No. It's okay. Thank you." You said, opening the door and getting out of the car.
"Should I pick you up in an hour?" He asked.
"No. He paid for the night." You informed, closing the door.
You walked up the steps slowly, somewhat intimidated by the oppressiveness of the place and trying to convince yourself that this was really happening, but when you approached the door, it opened on its own and you were overcome with the realization that you were about to spend the night with none other than Defender Strange himself.
As soon as you entered, the door closed behind you and you stood in the empty entrance hall somewhat disconcerted and not knowing what to do next. It took what seemed like an eternity until you were greeted by a baritone voice.
"Hello. I'm sorry, I was sure the woman I talked to this morning told me you would arrive at 9pm" He said going down the stairs and coming towards you. He was dressed exactly as you had seen him on TV or in the newspapers. Black and red robes, boots and hair tied in a ponytail, but gosh, the TV and newspapers didn't do justice to his beauty. Defined jaw, sharp cheekbones, plump lips and beautiful blue eyes. The man was gorgeous.
"I'm sure Madam Elise wouldn't get confused with my schedule. You must have spoken to Aline, her personal secretary." You said, feeling your cheeks turning red from the strange situation and also from the way he glared at you.
"Well, I have no reason to complain if her mistake gave me more time with you." He smirked, extending his hand for you to hold and bringing it to his lips. You knew that if it was any other man doing that you would roll your eyes at how cliché and ridiculous the gesture was, but with him all you could think about was how elegant and gentle he was. He just seemed so calm and kind.
"I'm sure you already know me, but let me formally introduce myself. Doctor Stephen Strange, or how my friends call me, Defender Strange, but you can call me Stephen."
You smiled "It's a pleasure to meet you, Stephen. I'm Y/n, but of course you already know that."
His smile widened "It's a pleasure to meet you in person, Y/n." He kept your hand in his. "Come, this is my house." He said gesturing ahead and taking you to the lounge and you found yourself analyzing every detail. The place was beautiful. It definitely wasn't to your taste, but it had a certain charm. Everything looked ancient, from the extravagant chandeliers to the reddish wooden furniture, everything seemed to have been there for many, many years.
"It's very nice." You said, still dazzled by every detail that was visible to you. The place was huge. "Do you live alone here?"
"Yes. I am the master of this Sanctum and therefore I live here. It is old and makes strange noises at night, but you learn to like it over time." He seemed to analyze your expressions carefully.
"But it must be lonely living alone in such a big place." You insisted, still amazed by the size of the place and you had only seen the foyer and the lounge.
Stephen smirked "It's rarely empty and work takes up most of my days, so I don't have time to feel lonely."
"Hmm."
"Please, sit. May I offer you something to drink?"
"Sure." You said, sitting on the beautiful victorian sofa.
"Wine? Maybe something stronger?"
"Wine is great."
He nodded. "Make yourself comfortable. I'll be back in a moment."
You did as he asked and as soon as he left, he returned with two glasses and a bottle of red wine which he opened and poured.
"I'm curious" You said, taking the glass he handed to you. "How do you know me? I mean, Madam Elise told me you asked for me specifically."
He smiled and took a long sip of wine.
"It's a long story. The short version is that a friend of mine told me about you."
"Is he a client?"
He chuckled, "I don't really know. I'm just glad he lead me to meet you."
You sipped the wine slowly, savoring the sweet on your tongue as much as you were savoring the enigmatic company of the man in front of you. However he downed the last of his wine and stood up.
"If you allow me, I need to finish a few things before I can dedicate myself entirely to you. Please, make yourself at home. Choose something for us to listen to, if you like music. I have a large collection. I'm sure something will please you."
With that he walked away, disappearing from sight and leaving you alone in the huge lounge.
You did what he suggested. You refilled your glass and ventured into the huge shelf of music in front of you, which to your surprise were not CDs but LPs. You got distracted reading the titles. He had a little bit of everything, from classical to pop music, including R&B and Hip Hop, classic rock and industrial metal and other things you didn't even know.
You opted for Bon Jovi and left it playing at a pleasant ambient volume and distracted yourself by scrolling through your Instagram feed for what seemed like a long time.
When he returned, he was no longer dressed in his sorcerer robes, but rather in dark jeans and a gray shirt. His hair, however, was still tied up in a ponytail and you found yourself thinking that any man in the world would look ridiculous with that hair, but not him.
"Bon Jovi. Good choice."
"A little cheesy, but I like it." You confessed. "I don't think I've ever met anyone who had so much physical music in the days of streaming services."
He chuckled. "Let's just say I'm old-fashioned. I'm not given to technology."
"No, just magic, I presume." You teased, getting up and approaching him, deciding to take the initiative. Men usually liked you to take the initiative, but with him you weren't too sure, but you had already waited too long and to be quite honest, you were eager to finally start the night.
"Are you going to show me some tonight?" You asked in your most seductive voice, and he let you snuggle into his arms and leaned his face against your hand when you touched him and finally, finally, he kissed you. A soft kiss, as if he was tasting a forbidden fruit, but you were eager to deepen the kiss, eager to finally claim him as one of your most valuable conquests.
His lips were thick and soft, his tongue tasted like wine and something else you couldn't identify and the touch of his beard on your face was delicious.
You couldn’t remember the last time you were this turned on by a kiss, but you could feel the slick between your legs. However, he pulled away gently when your hands threatened to unbutton his shirt.
"I can show you one or two things, but I'd like us to have dinner first." He said. "We don't need to rush, we have the whole night ahead of us."
But you had no intention of stopping now, not when your lips were finally on his mouth, down his chin and then his neck, nibbling his ear lobe. "I'm not hungry. Not for food at least." You whispered in his ear and watched him swallow thickly, but he grabbed your hand and pulled you away gently.
"I must insist."
You nodded a little confused, but let yourself be pulled into what soon turned out to be the dining room. The table was set and the food smelled wonderful. You hadn't really noticed that you were hungry until now, but it shouldn't have been a surprise since you had barely eaten all day.
He pulled out the chair for you to sit down and confessed. "I bought the food from my favorite Italian restaurant. I hope you don't mind. I would have cooked, but I didn't have time."
But he knew how to cook. Noted.
You smiled reassuringly, "It's great. It's more than I expected to be honest. Men don't usually serve me dinner. It's usually the other way around, you know?" You chuckled.
He poured your glass and his and then sat down too. "Men rarely know how to value what they have."
You felt your cheeks blushing and disguised it by taking a sip of wine.
"Well, they pay two thousand dollars for the hour." You said finally trying the food. "Wow, this is delicious."
He smiled satisfied and only them allowed himself to start eating too. "I'm not talking about money. For me, having the company of a woman, whether I paid for her or not, is always a privilege.
You stared at him and then gave in to your curiosity. "I wonder why a man like you needs to pay for a woman."
He didn't seem surprised or bothered by the question. He chewed slowly and swallowed, wiped his lips on his napkin and took a sip of his wine and then said simply. "I don't have to pay for women. But I had to pay to have the woman I wanted."
You felt your stomach fluttering at those words and something about the way he glanced at you and said it made you blush, and you smiled shyly. "I hope I'm worth it."
...
After dinner you convinced him to take you on a small tour of the house and your admiration for the place only increased with each new room that was presented to you.
"This is the library." He said, opening the two wooden doors and indicating for you to enter. He entered right behind you and waited in silence while you swept the place with your eyes.
 It was ancient and beautiful, like you expected the library of an old castle or something to be like. So many shelves of books that went from floor to ceiling and small ladders supported on the shelves so that people could get books from higher places. There were also small desks scattered around the place and a larger one in the left corner with a large wooden and leather chair. Some books, paper and pen and a pair of reading glasses on top of it.
"It's my second favorite place in the house." He reported proudly, "It's also where I spend most of my time when I'm not on a mission."
You nodded, walking slowly down one of the corridors and trying to read the titles of the books. Most of them were written in other languages. "Which is the first?"
He smiled getting closer and when he spoke again his voice sounded dangerously close to your ear "I'll show you."
You felt your skin prickle and that didn't go unnoticed by him. He held your shoulders and got close enough for you to feel his body pressed against yours. His fingers slowly pulled the strap of your dress and only then did you notice a tremor in his hands, but before you could ask yourself what had happened to them, he started to place little kisses on your shoulder and little by little he raised them to your neck and you completely forgot what you were thinking.
The little kisses went up to your ear and he nibbled your earlobe and exhaled heavily as if he had been holding his breath for a long time and your body trembled with the sensation of his warm breath.
Without holding back, you turned to face him and pulled him into a kiss and your lips collided with a passion that surprised you. His tongue invaded your mouth and dominated yours easily and your fingers were quick to unbutton the buttons of his shirt, while his fingers unzipped your dress and the two of you desperately undressed without your mouths separating for even a second. Suddenly the idea of ​​being apart from him seemed absurd and you were surprised by the overwhelming passion that took over you. It was as if the two of you were live wires that had finally touched and were now joined by an electric current of passion and lust.
When your dress was lying on the floor and your hands managed to free him from his pants and finally free his cock from his boxers, you pumped him a few times reveling in the realization that he was as big as you needed him to be. He rested his forehead on yours, closing his eyes and indulging in the touch of your hand and you cupped his face and pulled him back to your lips.
"I've waited for this for so long." He rasped in your lips, wrapping his arms around your waist and lifting you off the floor. You locked your legs around his waist, and he carried you to the largest desk and quickly finished undressing you, but made a point of keeping your high heels on.
He kicked his shoes away and did the same with his pants and boxers, leaving him gloriously naked for you and you watched in fascination as he moved his fingers and a condom materialized in thin air. He opened it quickly with his teeth and put it in with a certain desperation and finally entered you.
You both moaned at the sensation and you held yourself on to the edge of the desk as he thrusted against you with a certain desperation that was surprising and at the same time delicious. The sound of your bodies slamming against each other mixed with your moans and echoed through the empty library.
Your head fell back and he took the opportunity to bury his face between your breasts and took one nipple in his mouth and then another.
"Fuck..." You cursed out and then bit your lips to contain your moans, but they kept escaping as he fucked you so good and with so much passion and you suddenly noticed that you weren't forcing a positive reaction to please him. If anything, you were surprised with yourself, at how he was making you feel.
Your hand grabbed his hair and pulled him back to your lips and he kissed you passionately, thrusting his tongue into your mouth with the same desperation with which he thrusted his cock inside you. Fast, intense and delicious.
He broke the kiss only to run his lips down your neck and pushed you gently so that you lay down on the desk and pulled your hips closer to the edge and with a hand flat on your lower belly he returned to thrust into you and the variation of the position made him hit your g spot with calculous precision and your mouth went agape.
Men didn't usually find your g spot and didn't even bother trying, always desperate to achieve their own pleasure, but he was different, somehow he was different from everyone else.
"Stephen... You're going to make me cum."
You confessed surprise at how the knot seemed to tighten in your stomach. "Do you want me to cum, baby?"
He didn't respond, too involved in his own pleasure, but he put a hand between you touching your clit and rubbing his fingers there in slow circles and that was enough of an answer for you and your body responded to the stimulation quickly pulling you to the edge.
You came hard and he came soon after.
When he finished, he pulled you to meet his lips and something about the sweetness of that kiss made your heart flutter in your chest in a way you hadn't felt in a long time, but you were too caught up in all the sensations to pay attention to what they meant.
It was you who broke the kiss to breathe and he gently pulled out and quickly got rid of the dirty condom with a flick of his fingers and ran his hand through his hair, tucking the strands that came loose from the ponytail behind his ear and then smiled seeming a little embarrassed.
"This wasn't how I imagined." He said and upon noticing how that sentence could be interpreted in a wrong way he ran to explain "I thought I could get to the room. Give you a little comfort at least."
You stood up and approached him, cupping his cheek gently. "Believe me, you gave me something much better." You said letting out a small chuckle and pulling him back to your lips and something between his little moan and how his hand hold you closer to him made you feel like he was melting for you.
"Now will you show me your favorite place in the house?" You asked giving him your cutest smile and he nodded smiling.
"Anything you want."
The two of you got dressed in silence, but the silence wasn't awkward, in fact it was full of smiles and glances, and you found yourself thinking that you didn't remember the last time you felt like that, like you were on a real date rather than being with a client.
Either way, you pushed those thoughts to the back of your mind, remembering very well Madam Elise's words: No matter how incredible a client is, never forget they are just that: a client. Because they will never forget that you are a whore.
You sighed, letting the silly smile on your lips slowly die.
Stephen led you up the stairs and you walked behind him down a long hallway until you stopped in front of a large door, but before he opened it he turned to you and gently informed, "Many of the artifacts you will see in this room are magical and their value is immeasurable. I must ask you not to touch anything."
"Geez, I'm not that clumsy, Stephen." You defended yourself giving him your best smile.
"Please" He insisted.
"Okay, no touching." You promised, showing your hands to him and holding them behind your back dramatically. He smirked and then nodded opening the door and the two of you slowly entered. He snapped his fingers and the lights came on so you could actually look at the place.
It was a large and spacious room full of pedestals with vases and other objects on top, some were protected by glass, others were not. Everything seemed so old, from the heavy amber curtains and the gold and burgundy carpets to the cabinets and book shelves, the paintings on the walls and the ostentatious chandelier in the center of the ceiling. There was a fireplace surrounded by two loveseats and a fluffy dark brown rug. On the floor, next to the rug, there were some books and a forgotten tea cup.
But all of this was nothing compared to the beautiful round window that gave a beautiful view of Greenwich Village. "Wow, this is beautiful."
You approached the window to take a look outside where cars were rushing past. You had already seen that window from the outside, not to mention they sold postcards of the city with the front of the Sanctum Sanctorum printed on them, but being inside, observing the outside through that window was something else entirely.
"I usually come here when I need to think or just disconnect from my sorcerer problems." He explained, approaching you from behind and wrapping his arms around your waist. "This window is special, it allows me to see more of what is in front of me."
You raised an eyebrow "Is this some wizard code for something?"
He chuckled in your ear making your body tingle and then pointed to the window "This pattern is the seal of Vishanti, I don't expect you to know what it means, but it is very important and protects the Sanctum from various types of threats."
You nodded, looking at the intricate symbol in the window, but more precisely looking at him, so serious when he was talking about his work and so beautiful with that long hair, the gray strands just made him even more attractive and the beard, those cheekbones and the eyes...
"The window of worlds allows me to see other realities and dimensions. Some are pleasant to look at, benevolent so to speak, so you can easily get lost while watching them, others are dark and frightening, but it is my job to observe them and assure that everything remains in its natural state, without interference in our real world."
You smiled shyly admitting, "It's hard to combine the things you're explaining with the term real world. I live in the real world, this is… something else."
He let out a small laugh and then buried his nose in your hair and inhaled deeply, "You weren't real to me until tonight."
You turned to look at him "You talk about me like you know me."
He sighed, closing his eyes when your hand cupped his cheek, but before you could ask anything he pulled you to his lips and you felt your entire body shaking with that kiss, your heart pounding in your head as you gave in to the certainty that there was more than just sex involved tonight, even though you knew it was crazy, you couldn't help but feel that way. He was different, special and it wasn't because of who he was or the things he could do - magically speaking - but rather because of the way he could turn you into a puddle of goo with a look, a smile, a touch of his trembling hands and that kiss.
He was the one who broke the kiss first and before he could pull away, you pulled him to your lips again kissing him one more time. He smiled satisfied pulling away, but made sure to keep holding your hand and gently directed you to the rug next to the fireplace.
You watched him get rid of his shoes and did the same, letting your sore feet be caressed by the softness of the rug.
"I usually meditate here." He said, picking up the cup from the floor and disposing of it with a movement of his hand. "And I read. It helps keep me grounded. It's where I can have privacy, besides my room, of course."
You nodded, sitting on the carpet and reaching out to pick up one of the books, but he quickly took them out of your reach and returned them to the bookshelf.
"I'm surprised I can touch you, since everything here is sacred." You teased watching as he sat next to you, his hands automatically pulled you close and his fingers played with the strap of your dress pulling it down and placing little kisses on your shoulder. With his other hand he started to unzip your dress on your back and you felt your skin prickling.
"I am not sacred." He explained, searching for your lips and kissing you hungrily "Actually, I'm very human..." He continued kissing you, but his hands helped you get rid of the straps of your dress, letting it fall to your waist and undressing your breasts to him as he held one of them in his hand, pinching a nipple "...with human needs that I want you to satisfy."
You intertwined your fingers in his hair when his lips went down to your neck and he began to suck on your throat. He stopped and admired his work and then continued making sure the mark stayed.
"Y-you... can't..." You tried to warn him in vain when you finally noticed what he was doing, but he covered your lips with his index finger and continued until he was satisfied.
"What can't I do?" He asked with a cute smirk on his lips once he was satisfied with his work.
You swallow thickly feeling drunk, even though all you had drank that night was three glasses of wine.
"Mark me." You finally managed to say and his smirk turned into a grin.
"Too late for that, baby. Skin is very nice and soft, can't help it." And as if to prove what he was saying, he lightly bit the spot just below your ear and then sucked on the skin, eliciting a moan from your lips.
You couldn't tell what he had, but he managed to mess with you in a way that you couldn't understand, you could either think straight or formulate a coherent sentence while he had his lips on you. He made you melt, all your self-confidence and control seemed to melt before him.
"What's going on inside this pretty head of yours?" He asked, biting your chin and sticking his tongue in your mouth in another breathtaking kiss.
You hummed into his lips and tried to formulate a response when he finally broke the kiss.
"You. Right now, there is only you."
He smiled proudly, "Yeah? But there's another place I'd rather be at the moment."
You bit your bottom lip and waited for him to tell you.
"With my face between your legs." He rasped in your ear "Would you like that?"
God yes, please. But you just nodded letting yourself be manhandled as he laid you down on the fluffy rug and finished taking off your dress and panties. Your legs hung to the sides and he didn't wait to dive between them, lapping his tongue into your folds to make you even wetter than you already were.
He used his fingers to open your folds and licked your clit lightly with the tip of his tongue making your entire body tremble, your hands searched for something to grab and stopped in his hair, grabbing his ponytail, but you policed ​​yourself to don't pull.
"Oh fuck... oh yes, yes..."
He hummed approvingly at your reaction and the vibration made your body shake. Without waiting any longer, he took your clit between his lips and began to suck slowly and then increasing the pressure and you saw stars.
You loved oral sex, but the men you had sex with never cared enough to waste time pleasuring you like this, after all they were paying a lot of money, it was understandable they preferred to receive rather than give, but Defender Strange was different from all of your other clients, he was actually taking pleasure in giving pleasure to you and he was wonderful. You couldn't remember the last time you had your clit sucked with such dexterity, if anyone had ever managed to reach that level of excellence, that is, and your clit suckers could only do so much and were nothing compared to the real thing and Stephen, oh god, Stephen was even better than the real thing. He was perfect.
You could feel the knot inside you threatening to break, your legs shaking under the grip of his hands and the next thing you knew you were tugging at his hair, the hair tie came loose in your hand and you finished getting rid of it letting his soft locks fall like a curtain of dark brown and gray.
Of course he could feel you were close, your body was shaking, your breathing was faster, your wet, neglected hole was clenching around nothing and your moans were getting louder and louder, but then he stopped, brought his hand down to his hair moving them away from his face and stared at you with those blue eyes and a satisfied smile on his lips that somehow took your breath away.
"Please... don't..." You could barely speak.
"I don't want you to cum yet." He confessed and then crawled on top of you "You're so delicious, you know that, right?"
You pulled him to your lips instead of responding. The taste of your cunt in his mouth was so obscene and so delicious that you couldn't control a moan. He chuckled between your lips letting you control the kiss for the first time that night. Your fingers tangled in his hair and you couldn't resist, you pulled just a little to see his reaction and to your surprise and delight he moaned, a loud and unmistakable moan.
When your lips parted, he glanced at you and you took the opportunity to caress his face, tracing the outline of his beard with your finger.
"You're so beautiful." You confessed "You're even more beautiful in person than on TV."
He let out a little giggle and you could see a light shade of pink fill his cheeks and you thought it was adorable.
He kissed your lips softly and held your chin between his thumb and forefinger "You're beautiful. You have the most beautiful pair of eyes I've ever seen and your smile... it does things to me."
You smiled shyly with the way he was glancing at you and then watched as he seemed to go somewhere else in his mind for a second but soon after he smiled back. "Where have you been all this time?" He asked.
You weren't sure what to say, so you just pulled him to your lips again and kissed him, feeling a strange sensation in your stomach. His lips moved down your chin and he touched your lips with his thumb, gently forcing them apart. You took his digit in your mouth and sucked on it, teasing him to which he smirked.
"I want your mouth now." He asked, taking his finger out of your mouth and replacing it with his tongue and kissed you hard.
You cupped his cheek and asked, "Tell me how you like it."
There were many things you could do with a man's cock in your mouth and you mastered that art masterfully, but with him you were insecure, you couldn't read him and while that was frustrating, it was also what made it all the most exciting.
"Do you ask this of all your clients?" He asked, looking genuinely curious.
You shook your head "No. Usually I know what they like right away, but you... you're different."
He seemed to like your answer. He rolled onto his side and lay on his back on the carpet. "You can start by undressing me and then you can take good care of me."
You sat down next to him and let your fingers run down his chest, playing with the buttons on his shirt.
"Do you like being taken care of?" You checked.
"Very much."
You unbuttoned his shirt, pulling the fabric aside and placing kisses on his chest, lowered your hand to his belt and bit your lip, noticing his hard on contained inside his pants. It twitched with the lightest of touches from your fingers and you couldn't help the proud smile on your lips. You moved to straddle his legs and unbuckled his belt and pants and with both hands you pulled down his pants and boxers, moving to take them off completely and throwing them in a pile on the floor.
You went back to straddling his legs and finally laid your eyes on his cock. You had felt him in your hands and felt him impaling you, but it was the first time you were looking directly at him and god, it was beautiful. The curvature that let it lean towards his stomach and the veins bulging around it combined with the fat, pink head made your mouth water. He was pulsing and leaking from the head and without holding back you bent down and licked the slit to collect the precum and it tasted so good. Salt and sweet at the same time.
"I can take care of you." You purred. "Just tell me exactly how you like it."
He bit his bottom lip to hold back a moan when you finally took him in your hand, holding him tight.
"Slowly. There's no need to gag on it, just take as much as you can. And I will love if you suck my balls, lightly, I'm very sensitive there."
You listened carefully. All you wanted was to please him.
"Can I make you cum in my mouth?"
"Fuck, yes" He replied and his cock twitched in your hand.
"But there will be another round for me, right?" You confirmed, smiling mischievously.
"As many as you want." He promised.
Your mouth was salivating to have him, but you started slowly, just giving little cat licks on the head and running your tongue down his entire length while your eyes remained fixed on his. If there was one thing that was certain about all men, it's that they love it when you suck their dicks while looking at them with big dull eyes. Defender Strange was no exception. He bit his lip to try to suppress a groan and his hands grabbed the fur on the rug.
You contained a giggle watching his reaction and continued with your work, lowering your tongue to the base and then taking one of his heavy balls in your mouth. You sucked slowly and then took the other one and repeated the same process while your hand moved up and down, slowly pumping him.
"Oh fuck, it's so good." He praised you and you felt that strange feeling in your stomach again, quickly realizing that you liked hearing him praising you and trying your best to have more of that.
You moved your lips up, placing small wet kisses along his entire length and stopped at his frenulum, licking it lightly with the tip of your tongue. For most men, the frenulum was the most sensitive part of their cocks and gave them the most pleasure when stimulated, however it used to be neglected most of the time by women, but you weren't like all women, you knew how to pleasure a man and there was nothing you wanted more than to pleasure Stephen. Not only that, you wanted to be the best he ever had.
You alternated the licks with light sucks on the delicate area and he began to writhe beneath you, moans began to escape his lips and you noticed how his baritone was even sexier in that context.
"Oh, right there, f-feels so good. J-just keep doing what you're doing with your tongue." He asked and you hummed satisfied, flicking your tongue in his frenulum and with one of your hands you began to massage his balls, giving them a light squeeze. With the other hand you continued pumping him at the base and he started to pulse in your hand and you knew that if you didn't reduce the stimulation he would cum before you even put him in your mouth, but you didn't care, you wanted to see him cumming like that, you wanted to prove to him that you were that good, so you increased the stimulation on his frenulum, changing the light licks for a more efficient suction while still using your tongue, but now not quickly, but like a kiss, slowly and with more passion.
"You're going to make me cum if you keep this up." He rasped bringing his hands to your head, but he didn't push or pull, he just grabbed your hair in a ponytail to move it away from your face and allow him to have a good view of what you were doing. Men were visual creatures.
"Do you want me to stop?" You asked, stopping to make sure, but he shook his head vehemently.
"Please, don't stop. Just keep working your tongue like that."
You did as he asked, but stopped pumping him and let his cock fall heavily onto his stomach, using only your mouth to stimulate him and your hand on his balls.
You licked, sucked, kissed his frenulum and started all over again until his grip on your hair got stronger, pulling at the roots and with a loud moan he came on his stomach.
"F-fuck yes. Oh shit... oh baby..."
You couldn't contain the smile on your lips when you saw him in that state, you were so proud of yourself, and you hadn’t even put him in your mouth. The man was so sensitive to touch, you wanted to ravish him so much.
You crawled on top of him and he cupped your cheek, still panting, but there was a wide smile on his lips.
"How did you do that?"
"I barely did anything. You are very sensitive."
He smirked, "Or maybe you're just too good with that tongue. No woman has ever made me cum like this." He confessed.
You felt your cheeks blushing and that was also an effect of him over you. You weren't shy, but when he looked at you like that and talked to you like that you felt yourself melting. Instead of saying anything, you kissed him softly, but then went down your lips to his neck, licking, biting, sucking on his pulse point and continued moving your lips down to his chest, taking one of his nipples in your mouth and sucking and pinching the other. He moaned softly and you felt him twitching in your stomach, his cum running down his sides, making your skin and his stick together and making a mess, but you couldn't care less.
He was soft now, but not completely and as soon as the stimulation on his nipples intensified he began to harden again for you. The man had a lot of stamina and you could only be grateful for that because you couldn’t wait to have him inside you again.
"R-ride me." His voice sounded shaky above your head. You brushed your hair away from your face to look at him and he cupped your face with both hands "Ride me, baby. Use me. Wanna see you getting off on my cock." He asked and you felt your heart pounding on your chest. You nodded and kissed him.
"Condom?" You asked, trying hard to reason. He moved his fingers and a condom materialized between his index finger and his middle finger and he handed it to you. With another movement of his fingers his shirt disappeared, and he was completely bare for you.
Opening the package, you took his lips in a hungry kiss and your hands went down to meet his cock, pumping him slowly, but with a firm grip on your hands, making him moan on your lips.
You dedicated yourself to putting the condom on him, but first you bent down to put him whole in your mouth. His hands automatically grabbed your hair as he hardened until it was rock hard in your mouth as you bobbed your head on his length, finally giving him the oral he deserved.
"S-such a delicious mouth. So f-fucking perfect... I knew you'd be so fucking good to me..."
You couldn't shake the thought that he spoke to you as if he knew you and that it wasn't just because a friend had recommended you to him, it seemed to be something more, but at the same time you also knew that something in him was awakening a different type of attraction and that you were probably only seeing things where nothing existed because you were too involved, so you tried hard to push away those thoughts and dedicated yourself to giving him the best blowjob, using your tongue the entire time, swirling it along his entire length while taking turns going up and down and using a little suction on his head. You knew it was going well because he continued praising you between moans that grew louder and louder, however he held your chin and gently took his cock out of your mouth.
"As incredible as this is, I really want to cum with my cock inside you this time." He explained. "And not before you."
You smiled nodding and finally – reluctantly - put on the condom. Part of you wanted to fuck him raw, but in your profession, that was never an option.
Moving to straddle him, you directed his cock at your entrance which was dripping wet and let yourself sink into him feeling him stretch you deliciously.
You had seen dicks of all sizes and learned to get the best out of each one, but you couldn't be a hypocrite or lie and say that size doesn't matter. Yes, it matters a lot, and you were so grateful that Defender Strange was this big, providing you with the perfect amount of stretch and with that perfect curvature that found your g spot with surprising ease. All you had to do was lean forward a little, resting both hands on his chest and that was it.
"Oh y-yes baby... right there."
Stephen groaned in satisfaction, both of his hands grabbed and squeezed the fat of your waist, his eyes fixed on yours the entire time.
"Hit that sweet special spot uh? I can feel it. Feels so good, so fucking warm and wet... shit... squeezing me so tight."
You bit your lip, moving your hips up and down, turning it sensually every time you went down, letting his pelvic bone and hair massage your clit, providing shocks of pleasure that felt like electric currents running through your entire body.
"I love seeing you riding me like this, so fucking gorgeous" He purred "Come on, baby, need more, fuck me harder."
You increased the pace until you were both panting, the sensuality giving way to the tireless search for your release that you knew wasn't too far away. You couldn't help it, he was so perfect, everything about him exuded sex, the looks, the moans, the dirty words of submission taking you to the limit and at the same time making you hold on to the edge because you didn't want it to end, you wanted to let that continue forever.
However, he seemed to understand that you were stalling because he wrapped his arm around your waist and sat down leaving the two of you in a lotus position and began to move you faster on top of him, thrusting his hips against you to increase the intensity of the thrusts.
Getting carried away by all the sensations and feeling the knot threatening to break, you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and grabbed a handful of his hair tugging at it with more force than you should have while the movements of your hips on top of him became faster and more desperate.
"Do it again." He urged in your ear, his baritone little more than a whisper.
You pulled his hair again, even harder this time and his head fell back and you felt his cock throb inside you. A part of you loved that and without him asking you did it again and again and took advantage of the fact that his neck was on display for you and started sucking it hard, biting it and sucking again until it left a purple mark. Satisfied, you grabbed his chin and pulled him to your lips, sticking your tongue in his mouth and being surprised by the way he let himself be dominated and when he let out a sweet moan in your mouth and his dick throbbed again Inside you, you knew he had reached his limit.
You sunk your teeth into his shoulder, feeling the wave of pleasure and euphoria wash over you as the knot broke and you came hard on his cock and with a loud, animalistic groan he came soon after, his cock pulsing and spilling into the condom. God, how you wish it were your walls that he was painting white.
That thought alone should have been enough for you to question your sudden involvement with that man, but at that moment you didn't want to reason, you just wanted to feel.
...
You were still lying on the rug, staring at the ceiling in silence and immersed in your own thoughts. Although your head was still spinning, your breathing had finally returned to normal, and the reason seemed to be coming back to you because you were suddenly too self-aware of everything that had happened that night.
Stephen had left you for a few minutes and you could hear him cleaning himself in the bathroom. You should also get up and get dressed, but your legs felt like jelly and you couldn't find the will within you to do so.
When he came back and laid back down next to you he was dressed in gray sweatpants and his hair had been pulled back into a ponytail.
"Don't you think sex is a weird thing?" You said, verbalizing the confused thoughts in your head. "I mean, you say things you would never say if you weren't aroused, you do things you can't imagine doing under any other circumstances."
He smiled thinking for a second. "I think it's called intimacy."
"Yes and no. Personally, I think intimacy is different. It's when you feel free to continue talking after sex is over and how you feel about it."
"Like now?" He asked.
You didn't respond, instead you sat down and faced the fireplace.
"I have a list of things I don't do or don't let people do to me." You admitted it.
"What for example?"
"Hickeys" You replied holding back a smile "As you can imagine it's not smart of me to arrive at the appointment with my client marked by the previous client."
"And why do I think you weren't reluctant enough when you realized what I was doing?"
"Because I wasn't." You sighed. "I also don't usually kiss my clients. I mean, it's not a rule, but I avoid it if possible. It makes me uncomfortable."
He sat down, seeming to watch you closely, but didn't say anything.
"Talking about personal things, like I'm doing now, is also on my list." You hugged your legs and rested your chin on your knee giving him an apologetic smile. "You left me disconcerted."
He smiled touching your knee and with his other hand he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear and then caressed your cheek.
"I'm not usually like this with other women. Although I enjoy it, I rarely let myself be in a position where I'm not in control. I think it's safe to say that we both did things tonight that we don't usually do, and I don't know about you, but I really liked it and I really hope you liked it."
You sighed, feeling that strange feeling in your stomach again. "That's the problem, Stephen. You shouldn't care what I like or don't like."
"But I care." He replied chuckling dryly. "Is it really that bad that I care?"
You shook your head trying to think straight. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have started this conversation."
"You can tell me whatever you want." He said moving to kiss you, but then stopped and decided to confirm, "Is it okay to keep kissing you?"
"I don't know." You admitted with a sigh, but surrendered and threw yourself into his arms anyway.
He let out a small giggle when your lips collided, but then he took control of the kiss, kissing you like that was the only thing that mattered to him and god, he was such a good kisser. One of the reasons you hated kissing your clients was because they were terrible kissers and also because you thought it was too intimate. But with Defender Strange neither of those things applied.
When he finally got tired of your lips, he stood up and held out his hand for you to do the same. "Come on, let's go to bed."
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Reblog please! Leave a comment if you liked it. Interact! I will love to read all of your comments and opinions. It inspires me to keep writing!
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luvtonique · 2 months ago
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I haven't quite mentioned this in a while because my financial situation hasn't quite been as dire as before, but I think it's something I aught to bring up again.
Couple years ago I made a GoFundMe to help me get out of California, a state that's been crippling me and my family for decades now, and I've been living in poverty with my mom and brother on a surplus of about $500 spending money every month after bills.
This here's my GoFundMe.
When I created it, I had $5000 worth of PayPal debt and the interest was costing me $570+ a month because of how many years I hadn't paid it off. As of this post right here, the $4140 raised from that and some commissions I did along the way paid that off completely. I have not allowed it to hit $200 credit debt and have fully paid it off every month since. I haven't had outstanding credit debt and haven't had interest accrue at all in over a year now thanks to those donations saving me from that debt and my own hard work to never let it happen again.
I'm currently saving for a car. I want to get a nice van that will help my family greatly. We currently have two town cars, very small with not a lot of storage space, and that means that moving will be very difficult and a lot of trips. So I'm trying to put away about $4000 to go and get a van. That'll also help my mom move furniture to and from her workplace (an antique store) so we can get our house cleared of its Hoarder-Level-Clutter and make some profit off selling junk we don't need anymore.
Once I have the van, I'm saving to move to another state and create a base of operations in a cheaper place, and then I'll be helping my mother and brother sell this house so they can move out with me and buy their own place.
If anyone would like to donate, please, it's been lifechanging already and I've stayed true to my plan so far, nothing has changed.
I'm still working on my game, Melodi, and that isn't stopping any time soon, but that is gonna take a LONG time.
Here's a lil sneaky peek at that:
If you could reblog this, I'd appreciate it. Thank you, I love you.
~Jay Tonique (Formerly "Lil Miss Jay." Yeah, the Lil Miss Rarity guy.)
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weebsinstash · 2 months ago
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Not to freak anyone out but if you haven't started stocking up on canned goods and pasta and putting meat in your freezer you need to be doing that as soon as you can before the tariffs take full effect and inflation starts happening. Even as someone who saw this coming, even I've only been able to do so much. And I mean this for everyone because any problem that affects America affects the entire globe.
I'm always kind of short on money since I've moved because it's still hard for me to learn to manage it and emergencies or big purchases keep being necessary (and also because apparently someone in my department is transferring so they straight up changed my hours without even asking even though they know I don't have a car so I have to take lyft every day now) but I've literally been doing my best to stock up on canned goods and cheap pasta and things like that and today or tomorrow if I can I'm going to try and stock up on Allister's prescription food, which also isn't cheap and only lasts about a month, and he also has two daily medications that also need refills 😭
Do not be mistaken: an economic recession is coming, and it will eventually lead into an economic depression. Trump and his cabinet are doing this on purpose. Do you guys remember how during Covid, a bunch of mom and pop shops were forced to close and the ultra wealthy made literally record breaking profits as they caused inflation and were then able to buy up all this available real estate or buy out their competitors? That's what the GOP is doing right now. That's why Republicans in the Senate are literally refusing to raise taxes on the wealthy. Everything that is happening right now is to intentionally crash the economy and create the biggest transfer of wealth since Covid and the 2008 recession, except it'll be worse this time, because the MAGA administration is also intentionally isolating us from our allies and completely overhauling every single agency with the power to stop them
I'm honestly extremely worried. I have to forward money out of my paychecks a lot. Sometimes, most of my paycheck is gone before it hits and I barely make rent or have to be late a few days. When I had to suddenly move to escape my abusive home situation, which even now I reflect on all the traumatizing things that have happened to me since I was born and I don't really speak to my mother anymore, the sudden move without any help drained my entire savings account, and since I've had to pay Allister's monthly payment plan (luckily I was able to lower another bill) sometimes I'm really living in a razors edge over here. My tax return is already gone, not that it was very much. When it gets warmer I'm literally planning to build up strength to ride my bike to work so I can ride in the dark and get the overnight bonus for the few hours I can since they took away the original overnight shift I was hired for and now I make significantly less money
Everyone, good luck to whatever happens next. Maybe if we're lucky he'll ruin the economy and the world so goddamn bad another foreign government will step in, or maybe Republicans will grow some spines and help Democrats impeach the bastard, but seeing how they literally vote yes for every single goddamn thing that is happening, we may very well be captives in a country about to completely go to Hell
We're kinda extremely fucking cooked, my dudes
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itstheghostofmypast · 1 year ago
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MOOT GAME: " make up a trope for your moots and their biases. doesn’t need to be romantic. can be crackfic/funny/anything you want ^ㅇ(๑>◡<๑)ㅇ^ "
Okay- so, first of all, thank you so much Anon, for this ask and I'm sorry I responded to late, but I had to take my time with this one.😭💖.
So here it goes, (i know i said i'd do two biases, im sorry guys, i love yall too much and i get too invested the word count was killing me)
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1) @edenesth
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Park Seonghwa- Rivals to Lovers
Here me out, he owns an old book shop across the street, he's been there longer than you too. This was his turf, his town, his people, people who loved to read in his cozy library, with its olden print books, worn out pages, read through by generations of the same family.
All was great until one spring she shows up, with her whole pastel plus minimalistic vibes, all with the cutesy trinkets and plants, with warm lights- he noticed some books too, but they were only for show- in conclusion it was a horrid place.
A horrid place where most teens would go to after school now, no longer going to his bookshop, where they'd gossip, read novels or mangas, or even look at pretty pictured magazines (the safe kind, mind you he kept nothing nasty). What's worse was that the older folk began to go there, too! Especially because of how nice she was to them, so polite and so pretty and - ANNOYING.
He even went to 'inspect' the place, with a sour mood and an ill intention, though he was greeted with a burst of sweet aroma, one that had his stomach growling and his inner foodie, begging him to pick at least one of the many pastries or have a cup of steaming, delicious coffee. What came next was worst, her, with her gentle smile and angelic features.
"Hello! Welcome to Spring Avenue, how may we help you today?"
"You're taking my traffic."
"I'm sorry, I don't understand."
"Of course you don't."
With that he had walked out, starting a cold war, between the two. Ironically, she was a pacifist, never a fighter, but boy, did he piss her off, he knew all those buttons that would have her steaming like a hot latte.
The war had begun;
It all began when he put a " 10% off sign on Mangas, Fashion Magazines and Manhwas" that took a god chunk of her traffic.
In retaliation, she launched a "Friendship campaign, any customer that brings a friend gets a cake slice free."
Spend 2 hours reading here and leave with a borrowed book/novel of your choice."
"Buy a coffee and get a cookie free."
This continued throughout the season, so did their rivalry, to an extent that led their divided customers sense the tension. And like usual, highschoolers are escapists and this little feud of Seonghwa and her's was a problem they'd like to avoid, from her cafe they could see their beloved bookshop owner Seonghwa scowl at them, and if they were leaving the bookshop, the kids could feel the uneasiness in her smile that she give them once they'd pass her by.
"Congratulations, you're in loss." She sighed, closing the file, earning a scowl from the cafe owner, "Hey, I'm just here to check your bills, loss, and profit stuff, don't shoot the messenger."
"Alexia, come on." She whined, this was her dream, she'd put in her life's savings for this, "What should I do, Lexi?"
"Gosh, maybe not give out stupid discounts four times in a month?" Alexia sighed, rubbing her face, leaning back to stare at the bookshop across the street, "San said he knows the owner, maybe you guys could do a collab, instead of trying to each other's traffic."
"Who's San?" She asked her best friend, slash account manager and Public Relations officer- wait, was she dating!?
"Oh- uh- hey would you look at the time?" Alexia got up, grabbing her disposable coffee cup and bag, "Tell you what, you ask the bookshop owner dude about this? Okay? I'll get back with the details on Monday!" She called out as she walked towards the door, ignoring the cafe owner's questions about this San, "BYE LOVE YOU!"
That's how she found herself standing Infront of his bookshop that evening, still debating if she should go in or not? Was this idea even worth it, the guy was rude, annoying, stupid, incredibly handsome and sweet with kids and- the hell.
"Can I help you?" His deep voice came out of no where
She almost jumped out of her skin, only to turn around and spot the man she had been hating for the past ten months, standing there in all his angleic glory, with that ugly sweater and that overly comfortable scarf, not to mention his hair, his undercut had grown, quiet well too, perhaps he really was blessed with good genes.
"I uh..." she trailed off, pouting to herself, thinking of how he'd react, maybe he would make fun of her, or insult her or even go as far as to tell the town about her poor business management skills.
"Are you still open?" his question had caught her off guard, staring at him quietly wanting to see if this was a trick, only it wasn't, for when she nodded, he had looked around and then asked if he could...get a cup of coffee from there.
Of course she had said yes, why on earth would she say no to a customer, she needed the business. Unfortunately, that one cup of coffee, turned into two, then three, well- not as unfortunate as she would like it to be.
The two, mind you, who still didnt like each other, began to learn a lot about each other. He learnt how she was genuinely a sweet, caring and gentle person, her persona was indeed not fake but very real, this is who she was. She on the other hand, learned that he had inherited this business from his family, and he was an avid reader- sort a geek, a cute geek, a cute geek that could eat a whole chocolate cake with three mugs off coffee like it was nothing.
It wasn't until the third week of him visiting her cafe, that when he had stepped out to go there, he had bumped into her. She had almost fallen, but he was quick, gripping her wrist and pulling her into his chest, only to laugh when she mumbled an excuse, though he was glad she couldn't hear how his heart was hammering against his chest, wanting to stuff itself in the breast pocket of her coat.
That day she had asked him if she could check out his book shop, because she had been looking for old English bakery recipes and she couldn't find it anywhere, not any store around or online. Of course he had taken her to the right isle, in the right section in no time, this bookshop was his life and collecting and sifting through books was his passion, that day he had seen her passion, she had sat there, on the floor the entire night, reading book after book, mumbling to herself as she noted down recipes. He had sat next to her, helping her jot down notes, bringing her coffee- well not as good as hers, but good enough. At one point he had even ordered them a late night snack, well snacks, because he's a growing boy. He had closed the shop with the two inside, even pulled out a blanket and some cushions from the lounging area so she could comfortably work- she was a passionate girl and ironically he had realised something that night, only it turned into a full blown epiphany in the morning.
Next morning she had woken up right next to him, her head on his shoulder, his arm wrapped around her as the blanket was draped over the two, they had fallen asleep while reading- oh my, he really was pretty up close.
Though the two pretended nothing had happened, nothing had changed, however, everyone around them had noticed, the highschoolers would giggle when he'd come to her cafe for a cup of coffee, or how the older folk would pat him on the back when she'd step into the bookshop calling him out for help, with her little, "Hwa?"
Neither really knew how it happened, but one night while closing up he had waited outside for her, telling her he'd drop her home, even though she lived close by. Slowly this had become part of their routine, he'd often talk about the latest manga or an issue to the Star Wars comics or whatever on earth he'd talk about, but she'd always listen. Always smile and laugh at his jokes, while he'd readily accept any test recipes she'd try, telling her that his stomach was like a blackhole.
But when do the two get together? Simple, on New Years Eve, when he had to close his shop but she had decided to leave her cafe open, wanting to cater to all those who were celebrating the arrival of the new year with their loved ones, she knew Seonghwa had to go home anyway and she didn't want to spend the night alone since her family was out of town. What she did not expect was a few minutes before the strike of midnight, the cafe door chimed open as she turned to greet the customer, only to freeze at the sight before her- Seonghwa entering with a bouqet of origami flowers, smiling at her as he slowly walked to her;
"I- I know you don't like plucking flowers or bouqets, so I made you these."
"You...made these?"
"Ofcourse."
"W-why?"
"I...because I..." but before he could finish his sentence his ears picked up the count down, causing him to quickly place the flowers on the counter and as soon as the fireworks rang in her ears, it was as if she could feel the burning warmth in her body, taking a second to process how his lips were on hers, his hands cupping her face as her hands instinctively went up to grip his coat, pulling him even closer. Who knew that one day she'll end up opening a cafe that also served as a bookstore, who knew that one day, her little, evil, handsome rival bookseller, would be the New Year's kiss she never knew she needed, the man she never knew she needed, the lover that she was blessed to have.
2) @yessa-vie
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Jeong Yunho- Neighbors to Lovers
No, she was not the new tenant, he was, and for some ungodly reason he was also extremely ill-prepared to live alone. Like any other weekend, she was leaving her apartment to go to the cafe to sit in peace and finish her novel, but God had other plans. She had opened the door to come face to face with a tall, good-looking man, though the smile he wore scared her- he was one of those extroverts.
No, he was not mean at all, nor was he the manipulative kind, Jeong Yunho really didn't know how the pre-installed dishwasher worked, that's why he had come to her that fateful weekend, about to knock on the door but she had beat him to it, opening the door before he could, earning a sheepish smile in return- who knew his neighbour would be so gorgeous, who knew purple could look so good on someone?
"Hey, I- I moved in across the hall, apartment 19, lol, I guess we're neighbours, huh?"
She had only nodded meekly at his question, pulling her satchel closer to her person, not because she didn't like him, no, but because she wasn't much of a talker anymore, not so confident either and also- because regardless of how good looking this stranger was, he was still a stranger.
"I'm Yunho- Sorry to bother you, I know you must be going somewhere, but I- I uh- I wanted to know if you know how to operate the dishwasher?"
That's how she found herself in his apartment, leaving the maindoor wide open, so she could escape if something were to happen, but to her surprise he was just a regular idiot, one who thought the dishwasher was a rack used to dry the dishes- men.
That night Yunho met an angel, one who seemingly had her life planned out, held together well, while he was still trying to build something out of his- data analyst or not, living alone was not the easiest thing to do, yet, she seemed so nonchalant about it.
Overtime however, she noticed how he would come over to ask her for help often, sometimes it was the 'fridge isn't working right' other times it was the 'how much water do you add to rice while boiling it?' Honestly, she would've told him to piss off if it were anyone else, but it was her polite neighbour, her sweet polite, new neighbour who would pass her by in the corridor every morning, smiling at her and wishing her a good morning- even if she wasn't a morning person.
Ironically, he continued to ensure they cross paths, only because he wanted to get to know her, to talk to her, he really needed a friend, and since moving here meant Mingi and him could no longer hang out 24/7, he really needed another person to talk to, someone who was not Hongjoong from the finance department.
Ironically, she did not protest or tell him to get lost, instead she's quietly help him whenever he'd approach her, giving him a shy smile then going back to her apartment. That purple door tempting him to go back and knock on the old wood, wanting to know what Narnia like secrets she hid behind.
She let it be, truthfully, she wanted fo befriended him, but during these little adventures, she realised she had begun to neglect her book, the same book she had a deadline for, the same book she had been working on day and night, and now this puppy pops up and takes all her attention?
So what does she do? Simple, she starts to create some form of distance, leave before he'd be awake, come back home later too, also even if he did come to knock on her purple door, she wouldn't be there to answer it, so technically she wouldn't feel guilty right?
Wrong, instead God had punished her with a severe writer's block, one so bad that she had missed two of her deadlines, and according to her publisher, she was on her last chance. That's how she found herself at the very cafe where she would find solace, now on the verge of tears, staring at the laptop in pure agony, maybe this was payback for leaving him unattended and ignoring him or maybe she was never meant to be a writer.
A fresh cup of coffee was placed next to her hand, causing her to quickly pull back and look at the stranger, only her panicked eyes met a softer, more timid gaze, a gentle smile gracing her presence.
"Hey... you looked like you needed the juice." He smiled, gesturing towards the chair, as if asking for permission to sit down next to her, to which she nodded.
"I uh..." she paused. Should she even be asking him how he's been? Does she have the right to do so, or are they just neighbours- well, at this point, two strangers living across each other.
"I read your books by the way," he began, giving her a gentle smile, as he felt the way she had tensed up, honestly, initially he thought she was like that because his presence made her uncomfortable, but he soon realised it wasn't him, but she usually was this tensed all the time, this nervous and unsure, which made no sense to him because she was one of the most well functioning person he had met in the city, and he was glad to have moved in next to her, "It's great, the plotline is amazing and the details- you really captured the essence, I particularly liked the world you created, honestly, when I moved here I thought everyone wore those 'blockers' too. To not...feel stuff you know," he turned to look at her, only to catch her staring at him, a small chuckle escaping him when she cleared her throat, averting her gaze, "You were the only one who was nice enough to help me, even for the stupidest of tasks...it means a lot."
She stared at him in awe and disbelief. She had been trying to avoid him for almost a month now, couldn't he tell? Or was he just playing dumb- I mean he totally could be dumb, he didn't know a toaster comes with settings, just thought the numbers were there for the appeal.
After that the two began to "spend time together", it was strictly casual mind you, nothing personal, though he would drop by more often than usual, sometimes after work, sometimes on the weekends- to have dinner with her, he'd bring dessert, or to watch a movie with her, he'd bring the snacks- no, nothing domestic at all.
Or so they thought, because a few months in, he had come over by swinging the door open, yes he had the keys and she had his keys, only to find her standing there all dressed up.
"Where are you off to? What about movie night?"
"Oh no..." she gasped, "Yuyu, I forgot to tell you I had a date tonight." A date? Why? With whom?
"Wait, why?"
"What do you mean why?"
"Why would you go on a date when we- I mean...isn't it weird? Shouldn't you be more focused on your book, instead of this temporary romance?"
"Temporary romance?!"
"W-wait, I didn't mean it like that. It came out wrong-"
"Out."
"W-what?"
"I said get out!"
That happened a week ago, she had been avoiding him for a whole week, she had been ignoring his calls, his texts, his knocks- no he didn't barge into her apartment, it took him a great amount of time to get her to open up to him and he idiotically clowned himself. So he decided to go to the next thing, go to the official reading of her book launch.
He waited there at the back, listening to her intently, taking in each word, who knew he would ever fall in love with, her neighbour, the same girl who had helped with the dishwasher, brought him dinner at night, spent time teaching him the usual ropes of living alone- who knew the very same girl had changed the plot of the book, basing it on her life, expressing how the shy, depressed protagonist, who thought dying her hair purple would make her feel better, realised that the only thing that would make her feel better would be a companion, a tall, handsome man, with a heart of gold- it was not that she needed a man, no, she just needed a friend, and she had finally found one, the inspiration to her writer's block, the Chandler to her Monica, the- HE DIES!? 
He gasped, appalled at the way she had ended the story, where at the end, on his deathbed the man tells his beloved how she never needed him, but he needed her to function, to live through each day- bloody hell.
He waited for them to leave when he finally approached her, somewhat upset-no, he was very upset, as she stopped cleaning up to look at him, raising a questioning brow, "What?"
"I can't believe you!"
"Funny, Jeong, I should be the one saying that."
"What!? You killed me!?"
"What?"
"I come here to declare my undying love- no I come here to tell you how much you mean to me and apologise for never asking you out but getting upset when someone actually asked you out and you KILL ME IN YOUR NOVE?"
"First of all, I accept your apology, secondly, the protagonist was DEFINITELY NOT YOU, I made him up WAY BEFORE I met you."
"Oh..." he stared at her then looked around the almost empty bookshop, maybe he should just leave-
"So...Will you ask me out properly now or...'l"
"Move in with me."
"Too fast."
"Was worth a shot." He smiled when she let out a small laugh shaking her head at his antics, "Take me to dinner, Yunho." She smiled watching him lean closer then pause, as if asking for her permission,  "Can I...?" His question was answered when she gripped him by the lapels of his coat, pulling him closer to crash her lips against his, smiling when he wrapped his arms around her, pulling back only to press his forehead against hers,
"We move into my apartment..."
"What? Mine's great-"
"Yunho, have you seen the window and the balcony on mine?"
"Your apartment it is boss."
3) @jaehunnyy
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Choi San- Bestfriends to Lovers
Idiots, these two were complete idiots who were utterly in love with each other but were also too blind to realise that - why? Simple, because both feared that confessing to the other may ruin the long-held, deep bond.
A bond that had developed at the ripe age of childhood, middle school, to be more accurate. The day he had come to school, bored out of his mind, staring outside the window, wondering if he could jump on the closest tree to escape this prison. What he had not expected was an angel to come and sit beside him, well technically, the teacher had made her sit next to him, and he hadn't noticed her until she poked his shoulder lighter, causing him to jerk back and gasp, earning a few chuckles from the glass as the teacher just sighed in defeat.
"Wh-Hello."
"Do you need help with that?" She asked, pointing at the math equation in front of him. He looked at his notebook and remembered that's what they were supposed to me doing- damn that was a lot of daydreaming.
"Yeah, I guess...do you... know how to solve it?" He asked the new girl, too afraid to make eyecontact.
"Here, I'll show you." Turning to face him, she pulled his scribbled notebook closer.
"I'm San by the way."
That day onwards, a nice and quiet introvert at the back of the class finally began to crack open. From time to time, you'd hear him whispering to her, talking about some anime or a film. Often, he'd be telling her about his cat, Byeol, and how pretty she was. During break you wouldn't see San next to her for the first five minutes, no, he'd be sprinting across the campus,jumping down the stairs to go to the canteen to get her something to drink with her lunch, or a sweet snack, regardless of how many times she'd say 'it's fine.' During self study hours, she wouldn't be studying, no, she'd be busy tutoring her athletically gifted friend, he was...a little dumb, but that's okay, he was hardworking and she'd tell him she'd help him where he'd get stuck, explain and tutor where needed- especially in math.
As they grew older, he grew into his body, his self-esteem issues slowly subsiding, his feelings for her deepening, yet, never enough to tip the scale, at the bring of an edge but never enough to flow out he had to keep it all under control, because that's just how San was, patient and calm, he would never take a step if there was an ounce of the doubt when it came to how she felt about him. Though watching her spread her wings into the beauty she was, well, was somewhat problematic for him. Especially when she'd come to him, smiling like that, greeting him with the gentle voice of hers, asking him if he liked her haircut.
"What do you think?"
"It's...very nice."
"Just very nice?"
"You'd look pretty to me even if you were bald."
Conversations like these would have her heart hammering against her ribcage, and she'd pray to God that he couldn't hear it. She'd pray for it when he'd be walking home side by side, his shoulder bumping into hers, or his hand brushing against hers, when he'd take her bag from her, clicking his tongue at how heavy it would be,
"You trynna' build muscles like me?" He'd ask, though he was still very fragile, he'd only started going to the gym when he noticed how the 'basketball team captain', had decided to ask her to 'help tutor him too', though she had politely declined.
"Hmm? Of course not, Advanced Math books are just big like that..."
"Why do you do this to yourself, dove?" A nickname she had gained over the time, one used only by him.
"Because I wanna teach one day, I love teaching, I want to make sure people realise subjects aren't difficult or they aren't dumb, it's just that they're not taught properly."
Yup, he was smitten, on his knees, begging for her please ( he was also an idiot).
Ended up in college with her, though in a different major, like hell the now 'mountain of a man', no longer the kitten-like fragile boy, was going to major in math- business was a way better option.
This wasn't a bad situation, though they rarely had a few classes together, she'd still make time to see him, to text him as soon as class would end, but he'd already be standing at the exit, waiting for her with a coffee in hand and a dimpled smile, reserved just for her.
In no means was Choi San an extrovert, but somehow along the line he had met one, who later claimed that his MBTI had changed to an introvert too, though he doubted that notion- Jung Wooyoung.
Boistorous, noisy, obnoxious but a genuinely nice person at heart, Wooyoung was his companion in his major's classes, he was also the first person to know about San's little secret, since San trusted him enough to know, though Wooyoung assured him he had figured it out as soon as San introduced him to her as his "bestfriend".
"You're an idiot." Wooyoung snorted, taking off his shoes as he walked into the 4th years tiny apartment.
"What? Why?"
"You really think I didn't know?"
"How did you kno-'
"You can be bestfriends with a girl since childhood, unless a) one of you confessed to the other and got friendzoned but still chose friendship or b) neither of you confessed but are secretly crushing over the other."
"Wow, should've been a psychologist instead of a business major."
"What can I say, Sannie? I am a man of many talents."
Things progressed like this for a long time, Wooyoung watched from the sidelines how the two would basically act like a couple that was not a couple- almost everyone at campus thought they were a couple and Wooyoung was basically the third wheel. Not that he minded, and San appreciated him for that, he was glad Wooyoung's relationship with his dove was platonic- borderline sibling-like.
But Choi San was a fool, one that Choi San, at the fresh age of 25 wished that perhaps he'd be able to take the next steps, but something at the back of his mind held him back, were his personal desires as important as this friendship?
Which is why he stood there watching his best friend get ready for her date, her date with Wooyoung. After a conversation he did not like, but what could he say? He was too afraid to even confess, and well, Wooyoung wasn't a bad guy, and technically, he was his friend.
"I'm gonna ask her out, Sannie." The brunnet sighed, before taking a sip of his coffee, humming at the bitterness, perhaps this bitterness was sweeter than the bitter taste that had developed in San's mouth at the statement.
"W-why?" The bigger man with the fragile heart whispered.
"Because...I like her...I'm sorry but...I gave you time, so much of it and...I just wanted you to be the first one to know...if she says no, we'll all still be friends, but if she says yes...San, I won't hold back."
That had led to her first anniversary with Wooyoung, then the second and finally a day before their third anniversary San had texted the couple how he wouldn't be able to make it to their anniversary party because he had work that day and he wished them the best.
What he did not expect was someone knocking on his door at 2 am, opening the door to find a tear stained Wooyoung, only for him to punch the taller man in the face, watching him stumble backwards then wipe his eyes and sigh, "I swear- if you weren't such a great guy, I would've stabbed you."
"What the F*CK WOOYOUNG?"
That night was the first time he had seen Wooyoung cry, cry about how when she read the message she had become a mess, one that even Wooyoung couldn't fix, begging him for forgiveness how she made a mistake, how even though she was happy with Wooyoung, her heart belonged to someone else, someone who she thought she could move on from since he never confessed, since he never liked her back the way she did, and though the text was a confirmation of that, she couldn't bear lying to Wooyoung, to give him only half the love of what he deserved, knowing he deserved someone who would teach him the true meaning of love, because she was a teacher with only one student in mind, the idiot of a man- Choi San.
That night San couldn't sleep, not a wink, he processed the words over and over again, so did she like him? Should he confess to her? Now? Wouldn't that make it awkward? Or should he wait? Would that be a mistake?
Though his questions were answered in the morning when the doorbell rang at 7 am, making the sleepy man sigh as he stumbled to the door with blurry eyes, opening it still half asleep, only the slap he received woke sobered him up quickly,
"OW- WH- WHY ARE YOU JUST LIKE WOOYOUNG!?"
"SHUT UP! DONT TAKE HIS NAME! I HURT HIM BECAUSE OF YOU!" Never in the many years of knowing her, had she raised her voice like that.
"I-"
"NO! LISTEN TO ME!" She yelled before shoving him inside so she could continue yelling inside, "I like you- and you- you d*ck you could tell him you liked me but you couldn't tell me!? All those horrible dates you watched me go to, but you couldn't stop me?! You knew you liked me yet you let Woo ask me out!?"
"I- I didn't wanna ruin what we had..."
"San, I- what if I had married Woo? Huh? Then what? When you already had half my heart, I-"
She couldn't finish her sentence though, because the next thing she knew, he was smothering her with all that pent up love, his lips pressing against hers with a ferocity she had ever seen in her gentle Sannie, wanting to claim what he was too scared to touch before.
He only pulled back when she lightly pushed him back, gasping for air, looking up at him all flushed and pink, her swollen lips just enticing him even more,
"W-what was that?" She breathed out.
"Never say you're marrying anyone but me, I would've ruined the wedding even if it meant being thrown out."
"You're an idiot Sannie."
"No, I just had a teacher who could teach me math, but couldn't teach me how to love properly - guess she was learning too."
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sweetfirebird · 3 months ago
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More Things You Can Do
aside from protesting
There are a lot of boycotts going on right now. I have seen calls for an official day (February 28) of no shopping and others that are extended avoidance or limitation of using: Target, Walmart, Whole Foods, Amazon, Airbnb, Tesla, Meta, CNN, Fox News.
I've also seen boycotts, individual and collective, of businesses like Sephora or CVS, which voluntarily rolled back their DEI. (So did Disney, btw) But while boycott is a power you can flex (and save yourself money in the process), I think it's easier to list some places that have NOT caved on their DEI and/or who are even actively supporting it: Costco, Walgreens, Ulta, Lush, Penzey's, King Arthur Flour, Bob's Red Mill, Albertson's grocery stores (includes Safeway), Apple and more
Delete any Meta apps you aren't using/don't need. This includes Threads, Instagram, Facebook, Messenger, and whatever stupid VR thing they try next that will fail. If you do need to keep using them (small businesses, unfortunately, still often do), you can still keep Meta from profiting from you by going into your Privacy Settings and turning off any function that allows them to collect your information for ads. Meta does not make this easy to find, btw. And you are going to end up with weird ads, but just ignore them.
Go into all of the Meta apps you use, find the Privacy Center, under Settings, I think, find Ad Preferences or Common Privacy Settings. It's then going to make you click on more things, like Manage Settings. And then you can turn off settings like "Use your information to show our ad partners"
Then you have to find the other settings to turn off other companies sharing your information with Meta jfc
Here, John Oliver explains it better
Switch from Chrome. (I have to use Chrome to pay my electric bill, they won't let me use another browser. Dicks. But for everything else, I use Firefox or Ecosia) Firefox isn't Google but also Firefox lets you add extensions to block tracking or ads and I have one up to help limit Meta's information scraping anyway. And it's free! Switching only takes minutes!
Use Mapquest --Mapquest is not referring to the Gulf of Mexico as anything but the Gulf of Mexico.
If you are into these sort of podcasts, The Meidas Touch is openly critical of Trump and Musk, and just ousted Joe Rogan from Spotify's top spot.
This one is difficult for trans people right now but everyone, yes everyone in America, get your IDs in order and up to date. They are going to try to push some Voter ID shit too (where they haven't already) so take the time NOW to get your paperwork in order. Go request (or order through the mail) a certified copy of your birth certificates from the county where you were born. Going in means you only pay the County Clerk fees. Through the mail usually means you will have to have something notarized as well. (Hell, anyone who changed your surnames when you got married, maybe get a certified copy of your marriage license too.) Get a Real ID. Get a passport if you can afford it. Passports also require a certified copy of a birth certificate. If you have a valid passport, it will work in place of a Real ID but get both if you can. American passports are good for ten years (for adults).
Also, and this sucks, get your affairs in order. You could get hit by a bus or something, and you want to make sure your death is handled *how you want* and your loved ones get what you feel they should, regardless of your gender and how many roadblocks the govt is going to try to throw up in your way. Protecting Trans Bodies in Death and Making Your Death Plan (videos from Caitlin Doughty). Also and I know I keep harping on this, MAKE A WILL. MAKE IT LEGALLY. Look up your state's requirements for such a document or hire someone to do it for you. (Sometimes credit unions or regular unions will offer this as a service. LegalZoom also exists if that is more your jam.)
Fun stuff (cuz sorry about the death stuff!)
Got Spotify or Tidal or even Youtube? Start making playlists of POC and queer artists, and make them public. Search for BIPOC and/or queer podcasts and video essayists.
Personally, I've been putting on all the booktuber videos about ditching Kindle and just letting them play in the background while I do tasks. Someone is out there on Youtube speaking the truth? Like and Subscribe! (It helps them get visibility and shows Youtube there is an audience, and if it worries you... it's not permanent. You can unsubscribe later if you want.)
Like books by BIPOC and/or queer people?? Recommend that shit. Check it out from libraries even if you've read it before!
Be Kind. Be kind to people and to yourselves. Participate in boycotts and remember they can mean *totally avoiding* a store, or, if there is no alternative for what you need, then *spending far less* there than you normally would. Shop local. Shop small. Spread correct information as best as you can. Remember that Black lives matter, that trans lives matter, and that way more people on our side than they want us to realize.
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lola-babylon · 2 years ago
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Running the numbers on Brendon, Ryan, and owning the Panic! at the Disco legacy
Some people are a bit upset that Brendon Urie continued performing as PATD after Jon & Ryan left, or after Spencer & Dallon left. One of the primary criticisms you see floating around is that, by using the Panic name for his solo career from 2015-2023. Brendon was profiting off of Ryan's legacy as the main songwriter on the early albums.
Let's dig into that, especially the "profit" bit.
I've seen jokes about Ryan Ross working retail now cause he's broke. We don't know what Ryan does with his days and it's none of our business unless he chooses to share that information publicly, but AFYCSO alone has been certified 4x Platinum in the US, having sold 4 million copies. Ryan, being the main songwriter on the album, would one hopes receive a decent income stream for the royalties and has no need to work a job he doesn't want to pay the bills (recording contracts are usually a Kafkaesque nightmare, but hopefully they had a decent contract where the artists get a fair share of royalties, that it isn't all chewed up by record companies).
But if you look at the album sales over time, this is where it gets interesting.
(well, interesting to a stats and facts wonk)
Here's the Recording Industry of America's certification record for AFYCSO - you can check for yourself here
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The album went platinum, meaning sales of a million copies, in 2006, a year after it was released. It took another 9 years for the album to double that figure, selling 2 million copies by 2015 and achieving 2x platinum. But then things took off, with AFYCSO reaching 4 million sales by June 2023 and the resulting 4x platinum certification.
But what stands out here is this - AFYCSO was released in 2005. And fully half of all sales of AFYCSO took place after 2015.
2015 was the year that Panic became a solo project of Brendon Urie's. It also marked the start of the period of some of the band's highest sales since the early days, including their first number one charting album, a second number one album, and (Jebus, please save us from) the single "High Hopes". And Brendon toured extensively - musicians used to tour to encourage people to buy their albums; now that most music is digital musicians rely touring as their largest source of income, which is one of the reasons why a ticket to see Led Zeppelin on their 1975 U.S. tour cost $31 adjusted for inflation to 2023 dollars, but seeing any decently sized musical act in concert these days will set you back well over $100 and that's just for starters.
(I told you I was a stats wonk).
Anyway, through all that work, Brendon was using the Panic name, sure. Was he entitled to? That's not my point here. What he was doing was keeping the Panic name in the public mind, entertaining old fans and winning new ones (not my thing, but again that's not my point) and in those years, those fans purchased 2 million copies of AFYCSO, and as the main songwriter on the album Ryan has received the largest share of the royalties from those sales. Ryan earned and was entitled to that money, of course, but would AFYCSO have sold two million copies between 2015 and 2023 if Brendon had retired the Panic name and continued as a solo artist?
Let's be realistic. No.
When people heard High Hopes or any of the other post split music, they were hearing a Panic at the Disco song. If they liked it, they'd look up the artist Panic at the Disco, find the band's earlier work, and buy/stream it. If they'd heard High Hopes as a Brendon Urie song, and looked up the artist Brendon Urie, is it likely they'd have followed the bread crumb trail, learned about this now defunct band called Panic at the Disco Brendon used to be in, and bought that band's stuff too?
We could go back to 2004/2005 and debate whether Panic would have made it as big as they did back then without Ryan's songwriting skills and determined online hustling of the band. Or without Brendon's vocals and stage presence, or Spencer's creative vision for their image and live performances. Or without that they were all so young, they were just crazy brave enough to put their all into the band when if they'd been only a few years older, they might have been worried about the future enough to stay in or go to college, or train as a hairdresser or whatever. Or for that matter whether they had all that, and the right sound at the right time, and made the right connections, oh and they weren't exactly bad looking. There's so many reasons bands do or don't make it. Just talent is never enough. Trying to work out which parts of Panic's early success were due to the respective talents of Ryan, Spencer, and/or Brendon nearly 20 years on is like trying to unscramble an egg (even Brent paid a role, through the loans his parents provided to help pay for the band's practice space and van for the early tours). But it's unrealistic to say Panic was a success solely because of Ryan or that Brendon trampled all over that to get to the top solo. Either way....
Brendon Urie continuing as Panic has been, financially, very benefical for Ryan. Brendon continuing with the Panic name has meant AFYCSO was from 2015-2023 the first album of a very successful currently touring act, and not a footnote to Brendon Urie's career from his now defunct first band (I don't see it that way at all - this post is about album sales and money, not artistic integrity). And Ryan has received the royalties from albums that would never have been sold if PATD officially disbanded in 2009 or 2013 or whatever.
And whilst Ryan has been at home restoring antique cuckoo clocks or whatever he chooses to do, Brendon's been missing his family, home, and dogs, getting up at 4am to catch flights, living out of suitacses, answering inane interview questions, sleeping on tour buses and wondering what country he's in today - and, indirectly, making Ryan money. If Ryan only cared about money he probably would have continued on with Panic past 2009, but I'm sure the royalties he's received since 2015 haven't been a burden either. I'm not saying Ryan owes Brendon anything, he doesn't, and Brendon only lived that life because he loved it, or thought the performing bit made it all worth it (along with making a bunch of money for himself).
This post has focused on AFYCSO, though of course Ryan also gets royalties from Pretty. Odd, which has had a long overdue reappraisal from audiences who realise it's really fucking good. (I'll use the correct punctuation this once, but there was no way I was going to add an exclamation point every time I typed the word panic). Anyway, crunching the numbers on one album was enough. But Brendon didn't profit off of Ryan's legacy by continuing as Panic. It's been very profitable for them both.
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Wormville: Gen 1: Business Bounty
This ficlet was a challenge, and in the end, I don't think I passed. I wanted to show some of the ladies interacting, and I aimed not to have said interaction revolve around being lovey-dovey or trying to drop the other's panties down. However, in the end, my idea couldn't be done without a sprinkle of both, since it's a couple of Romance Sims we're talking about who have been all over each other ever since they were teenagers. Anyway, enjoy this slightly yuri-flavored piece of poor business planning.
The Sims featured are Beatrice Jilleni and Hannah Devir, with a small name drop of Bennett Jilleni, Felicia Devir and Elphius Celwitch.
Other than that, I also took the liberty of name dropping the Jillenis' house, Hard to Describe.
No content warnings apply. There are slight suggestive undertones at the end (how much suggestive depends on your imagination), but still completely SFW.
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I unfortunately didn't have time to go pose the Sims, so as an apology, please have a Hannah thematically located in front of some clothing.
“This is all the money I have,” Beatrice plays with the pen in her hand.
“And with mine, we have enough for the building and the start-up.”
“Now, what about Nico? Have you talked to him?”
“Yeah, and I have the permit.”
“Sweeeet,” Beatrice laughs with relief, leaning against the wall with the phone speaker in hand.
“Dance studio, underway!”
Beatrice's confused silence is the only response at first, and she shifts awkwardly.
“You mean a clothing store…?” she asks.
She hears a hesitant chuckle. “What clothing store?”
“My clothing store.”
“Wait.”
Beatrice slides into a chair and puts one leg over the other, frowning. “Hannah, can you come here?”
No response.
“Hannah, are you there?”
Silence.
“Hannah!”
Beatrice gets up and hangs the phone speaker back on the wall. She then returns to the table and looks at her calculations once again. For ten minutes or more, she just sits there, feeling her anxiety slowly amp up.
Suddenly, the door swings open.
Hannah Devir confidently struts in. “Hey, love. You summoned me?” she purrs and walks up to Beatrice to pull her into a kiss. The other woman doesn't resist. On the contrary, she leans in and embraces Hannah.
When they finish their greeting, Beatrice raises her eyebrows. “So, would you explain what you meant with the dance studio?”
“I meant what I said. I thought we were opening a dance studio together. And we are, right?”
“I thought that we were opening a boutique, with handmade clothes and a thrift section…”
That gives Hannah a pause. She scratches herself behind the ear. “I knew you wanted one of those, but I didn't think you meant the place we're buying!”
“And what else would I mean? I don't have the money to open two businesses!”
“And you tell me that now.” The dancer dramatically throws her hands in the air and lets them swing along her hips. “All after I got so excited that you wanted to help me finally get the studio going.”
Beatrice frowns. “And I do! I think it's a great idea and that you should deffo do it. I just thought that we'll open the shop first, make some more cash and then use it for the studio.”
“What if we did it the other way around? We could sell snacks and set membership fees, and make enough dough for your store.”
“How many members will you have? Five? And even with all the snacks in the world, the studio still won't be profitable.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“I had to develop a sense for such things when I was still the Beldine heir.”
“Okay. Maybe you're right. But the studio needs much less money flowing into it from the get-go.”
“That won't matter when we won't generate any more money. The amount we save will be lost in bills in three months.”
“Does everything need to be about money?”
“Do you understand that I want my shop, right? And I can't just afford it with my pretty eyes.”
“You could afford the world with those,” Hannah chirps. “Can't you ask the Beldines for a bit of help?”
“I can't, and I don't even want to. I saved up the money by myself, and I thought that with you, we can make it without going into debt.”
“...and you don't wanna sacrifice your dream only so I can have mine. I see.”
“You're making me sound like an asshole, while you're doing the exact same. You won't even postpone yours for like a year.”
“Maybe working together was a bad idea from the start.”
“Hannah…”
The dancer sits down at the table and slumps. “I'm sorry, love. This is a lot. I really lived for starting the studio with you. I thought it was gonna be so much fun.”
Beatrice sighs. “Now I feel bad.”
“It's not your fault. I'll probably wait for some time to have all the cash just by myself.”
“Giving up easy, hm?”
That is when a mischievous look breaks through Hannah's melancholy. “Or maybe I'm just playing on your heartstrings?”
“Be careful. That's a game for two.” Beatrice gives her a foxy smile.
Hannah returns it, but then gets serious again. She takes a break, like if she needed to really consider her words. When she speaks, she makes a direct eye-contact.
“Do you think we'll be able to hang out like before even though our… project bombed?”
“Love…” Beatrice smiles and shakes her head a little. “We've been through so much worse. And we've always stayed together.”
“Wait. You’re right. We have stayed together. And I think,” Hannah suddenly straightens her back, “I mean, I wouldn't actually mind selling some clothes behind my studio. Or in front of. Or below. Or above it.” She beams.
“I thought you would hate it, so I didn't even bring the possibility up!” says Beatrice and the metaphorical twinkle in her eyes is almost real. “We can just fuse it! And we'll save money on having it be only one building!”
“Your shop will also drive more members to my studio. And after dancing their asses out, everyone's gonna want to rest their bones just hanging around and picking some new fits!”
“Okay, okay, now we need… holy fuck, we need to do so many things…” Beatrice laughs. “We're lucky I haven't been able to really get an architect yet, so we don't have to totally redo the commission.”
“Too bad about Elphius, huh?”
“Yeah.” Beatrice manages to pull back on her excitement and frown. “How's Feli holding up?”
“Working herself to death to cope,” Hannah lets out a long sigh. “It's tough on her, but she's a fighter.”
“Maybe Ben and I should swing by tomorrow? We could pop a bottle of wine and chat away. It could cheer her up.”
“You can already bring some stuff over to make the moving easier.”
“But we'll definitely hire a nanny and leave the kids at home. Maybe Naomi would like to come here for a sleepover?”
“That sounds good to me… I might even wear something really special.” Is there a hint of blush in Hannah's face?
Beatrice bites the side of her lower lip a little. “And you definitely mean a nice dress, right?”
“Perhaps… perhaps something subtler, more secret.”
“And I could dress up, too…” The socialite looks up from under her eyelashes. “Would you do me a favor and help me choose?”
The corners of Hannah's mouth curl even more upwards, but then her smile disappears. “Fuck, I can't. Sorry. I'm having a job interview in an hour. We'll have to make up for it tomorrow.”
“Oh well. It's back to the paperwork for me, I guess.”
“Alright. I'm gonna go. But first… come here…”
And with one last kiss, Hannah leaves Hard to Describe.
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blackmageeljin · 3 months ago
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You know, I've had it happen a lot where I am comically so many different minorities that if I ever try to go to a minority specific group for one they are uncomfortable with the other. Like.
I am too disabled for the trans support group to be comfortable with me.
I am too pagan for disability groups to be comfortable (bc we all turn to our religions but they get weird about mine)
I'm always too a b c for x y z. But today had to be the worst one
Which was being too poor to fit in socially with the other pagans I found.
Literally, I don't know what I'm supposed to do anymore. The level of poverty i live in is astounding. We just went a month without running water in the house. No working plumbing. No flush toilets. We went to a nearby campground to use public showers. Our house doesn't have heat outside of a few rooms. (This by the way, isn't what broke the plumbing, the pump house itself broke from global warming dropping the temp to record lows in a mild weather area). We are on SNAP. We live in a house full of holes with broken windows and countless problems bc it was the only thing we've could possibly afford.
I'm sure a lot of people think the animals we keep are a luxury but it's really not. Especially our chickens now- the feed for them is much cheaper than the eggs they produce, and in spring and summer they can forage for even less. It's not luxury pet chickens (tho I love them dearly) it's being so poor we have to put the work in to raise our own chickens to save what we can and ensure we have something to eat because we can't afford the luxury of the convenience of a grocery store.
There have been times we wouldn't have had food if we didn't have extra eggs from our chickens.
We literally did not have water to drink or cook with.
We spent days huddled in one corner of one room with half the animals for warmth.
We still have to worry about whether or not we'll have enough money to pay bills. Bills for things like medications and doctor visits that can save life.
Literally I risked suffocating because we couldn't go to the ER. I waited for my wife to get home to drive me to the doctor who happened to have a soon opening with my throat swollen shut from an allergic reaction.
People don't get what it's like to really struggle when the idea of something like a house without plumbing to them is 'something that hasn't happened Ina century's, even though there are people living IN THIS COUNTRY TODAY who just, don't have those luxuries even if they have a physical house or shelter that make them not 'homeless' from a legal standpoint.
Half the time my wife just tries to make due eating what they give her at her teaching job so she can save money for the restrictions I have to my diet for medical reasons. And then I feel guilty and terrible.
People don't get how different it is when you agonize over guilt about wanting to buy a single thing that sparks joy to stave off the depression at THE DOLLAR TREE because you're not sure if that'll be the dollar that makes the difference. Struggling to 'pull myself up by my bootstrap's and make money selling things but having to buy materials and constantly agonizing over the smallest profit margins because I need to be able to afford to fucking eat and buy medicine.
So when everyone else in a group is just, so utterly clueless, and even when you talk about not having water, or your broken windows, they all sit around and talk about how affordable the 20 dollar bead necklaces they sell are or how they 'don't really make much' while having their floors completely replaced in their house. How they would never stoop to buying such a 'terrible, run down cursed house' that is a)more expensive than the one you live in and b) A REALLY NICE SUBURBAN RANCHER WITH LIKE, SOME SLIGHTLY WEIRD ARCHITECTURE AND A MINOR BASEMENT FLOODING ISSUE???
And even after sitting there trying to express I was uncomfortable, or how some people don't have an option, I get pretentious answers about 'being too sensitive to energy to live in a house like that's which is really just salt in the wound because I have been literally *trapped in horrible domestic situations I could not escape* but sure fam, sit there and tell me 'its just a joke bro' while you continue to shame anyone for wanting to live in a mildly disgruntled house during a major housing crisis. There are ways to say 'i would never want to live there because I knew the people who died in it and didn't like them' without making broad sweeping strokes about 'why would anyone ever want to live in such a dump?' no one fucking does Susan, but some people have to, so shut the fuck up and stop rubbing affordable housing in the face of your friend who makes probably not even a 16th of your monthly income.
And that's somehow harder than being not able to eat sometimes. It's feeling like if you're ever honest people think you are begging. It's about people laughing at something where you are the butt of the joke or just don't even exist and feeling so god damn alone and isolated and helpless. It's knowing every friend you might make might eventually decide the class gap is just too uncomfortable and leave or worse- rub it in your face and salt in the wounds.
I'm tired
And I really appreciate having sinks and flush toilets.
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nicnacsnonsense · 2 years ago
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📖 👀
Perhaps I can interest you in a Gravity Falls one, just to mix it up a bit?
Cheating a little here because I have written some of this one, but I don't know when I'll be back to it, and I do really want to share. It's sort of my Science Dad AU meets the A Better World bit from Journal 3.
(Anyone who doesn't know The Whole of Us/Science Dad AU, it a fic where Dipper & Mabel are Ford's kids from a one night stand that he didn't know about until he had a pair of five year olds dropped on his doorstep. Stan is called in to help Ford with taking care of them and Stan & Ford reconcile. Beyond that it roughtly follows the major story beats in the first part of Journal 3, with a lot of family fluff and trauma healing thrown in. And of course they get a happy ending of beating Bill before Ford falls in the portal.)
The plot of the fic was that a more canon-typical Ford shows up in the Science Dad universe in the same way that canon Ford does with the Better World excerpt in Journal 3. But really the plot was just an excuse to tour the future of the characters from the Science Dad AU, so here are the highlights.
The Institute of Oddology exists, though built around the Pines' house. It's still nearby in Gravity Falls, just not right on top of their home. Ford is the Director of the Institute, and Fiddleford -- who still has a happy relationship with his wife & son -- is the Head Researcher.
Dipper also works at the Institute, and he's acually the one who comes to fetch Ford after security takes him in. He used to be a researcher too, and he still keeps his hand in it, but his actual job title is Head of Public Outreach. He makes YouTube videos. Dipper's Guide to the Unexplained started as a little side project and ended up gaining so much traction that it's his full time job now. He's like the Bill Nye of Oddology. And the Institute funds him doing it, because it encourages interest in their still very new field.
Mabel lives in Portland and is the head of a non-profit that she founded to help combat child abuse and help victims of it. It's called "The Lucky Ones" because she refers to herself & Dipper as two of the lucky ones because they were saved by their dad. It's both a reminder that there are more kids out there that aren't so lucky, and a mission statement that they are going to save more kids and make more lucky ones. She is happily single and lives with her adopted daughter Pacifica (another one of the lucky ones) and their pet pig Waddles.
Ria still dies; I'm so sorry! But before she dies she makes Stan promise he will be there to look out for her son, keep his asshole biological father far away, and be a dad for her baby the way he was a dad for her. Soos still lives with his abuelita, but he calls Stan dad and has since he was four years old. (And he also still works for Stan of course).
Stan works at the Museum of Oddology (And Gift Shop!). This is technically a separate business from the Institute because they didn't want Ford to be Stan's boss, but it is partnered with and adjoined to the Institute. Stan and Ford also have a boat, and every other year or so they go out on a months long research expedition together, just the two of them. That's actually where they are when this fic takes place.
There's also a running joke in the story where any time someone sees Portal!Ford for the first time, they very first thing they say is "You're not Ford/my dad/my grandpa/etc." It's meant to show how close they all are that despite the two Fords nominally looking identical, everyone can immediately tell that this Ford is not their Ford. Except Stan. They do a video call to the boat and Stan immediately, without any forewarning or knowledge of the situation, smiles and says, "Hey look Ford, it's you." Because obviously Stan knows this is a different version of Ford than the one on the boat with him, but as far as Stan is concerned any version of Ford is still Ford and Ford will always be his brother.
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diagnosed-overthinker · 7 months ago
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Just saw a pro-nuclear post and I have an opinion and no one can stop me cause its my blog:
I am against nuclear power, but not for the reasons you think.
I agree with the science that proves that on basically all metrics nuclear is safer and more environmentally friendly. I know that it is easy enough to transport and store nuclear waste safely, and I know it isn't sci-fi luminescent green goop in barrels. I also acknowledge the advances made in reactor tech that make our current day reactors much safer and efficient than those from last century.
Nuclear power works and is a viable source of base load power. I do not contest this. The reason I am against nuclear is because of the possibility of exploitation by the private sector.
Nuclear power may start off government-owned, but corporations with interests in the field WILL lobby for privatisation. This has happened before with fossil fuels, especially in own country. Once nuclear is privatised, safety standards will drop, prices will go up, and we still won't be able to afford electricity even though massive savings were made. Who made those savings? The corporations of course. And they won't be sharing them with you.
For this reason I am a big believer in personal solar energy production. Governments investing in solar companies will not lead to the same kind of privatisation that nuclear and fossil fuels experience. This is because it's much easier to set up a plant to make solar panels than to get a Uranium mine. Not to mention the fundamental difference between solar and nuclear: solar is a one-time purchase, nuclear is a subscription. A good solar array will last you 25-30 years with minimal maintenance, whereas you have to pay energy bills every month for nuclear power.
This isn't to say solar is perfect. It doesn't work at night or when it's cloudy, and thus can't act as base load power. I acknowledge that we will need some nuclear power, but I also believe that the media push towards nuclear isn't nuanced enough and will lead to another age of dependence on corporations. We should dispell the myths about nuclear, but also keep in mind that nuclear is the next vehicle for corporate profits at the expense of the consumer.
I don't deny the issues with sourcing silicon for solar panels, and the problem of mining companies exploiting and abusing local populations to extract every dollar they can from the Earth. These problems are present in all our energy production however, and to discard solar but not nuclear or coal for this reason is dishonest.
TL;DR: I am against nuclear because of the threat of privatisation by corporations, and I believe encouraging the use of solar is much better than using purely nuclear.
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aelfgiure · 11 months ago
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I stumbled out into the garden, clutching the papers in my hands and trying not to howl, to scream in rage and loss. After surviving the heart attack, going through the rehab, working my ass off to pull my life together again, the bank had decided to really fuck me over. Fuck me over so hard I didn't know if I could ever recover from it.
Foreclosure. I'd had a few months where the mortgage payment was late, but I'd always paid, damn it! Even when it meant that I lived off foraged stuff, or the occasional bag of groceries from the food pantry, I paid them. Damn them! I fell into the 'nest' I'd made of willow withies to curl up around my hurt and just cry. After all I'd survived, all I'd done to keep it together and keep my home, I was about to lose it all, forever.
There were no savings. I'd just started bankruptcy proceedings because the medical bills were killing me all over again, paying off the damn things would take me multiple lifetimes, so I gritted my teeth, and bit the bullet, knowing my credit rating would be utter shit for the next seven goddamn years. That was when Wells-Fargo swooped in with the totally legal 'expedited foreclosure', so they could evict me before the bankruptcy hearing and resell the house to someone with money, probably a broker or an investor, damn them to hell. Once again, someone was going to profit off my pain and loss, and I was screwed.
"Tss, tss, tss, friendling. Why tears? Why weeping?"
The soft, silvery whispers got my attention, and I wiped my eyes so I could focus on the TRUE owners of the property, not that they thought of it that way, ever. They swarmed over me, crooning and shushing, and if I was reading their tone and body language correctly, they were concerned. They hummed and whispered and talked, faster than I could follow, maybe it was a language that I didn't know, hard to tell with the Good Folk.
"I'm so, so sorry, my good friends," I managed to smile a little. "I'm sad because I'm going to have to move away."
It was getting weird. More of them kept showing up, more than I'd ever met before, and they mood was somewhere between sorrow and anger.
"WHY?"
Um. Okay, that was the hard part. How do you explain modern banking to a group of Beings who don't do banks, or modern, really? I did my best. I had the paperwork right there, after all, so I translated the 'lawyer talk' into real talk, did my best to tell them about the laws that gave the banks the right to take the house back. Even after all I had done, all I had gone through, they were going to take my house and evict me, because they could.
The crowd grew, and that was getting disconcerting because this was a much bigger group than I'd met before, and they were all talking at once, to each other. Some of them understood what was going on, so they were explaining it in terms the others could comprehend. This was getting intimidating; they were all getting worked up in a way I'd never seen before. The hissing and whispering kept increasing as their mood turned angry.
Then silence.
The one who had introduced himself to me first, as I sang and weeded my garden, pulling out the noxious invasives and encouraged the violets to grow and take over, Good Fellow, came up to me. They touched the paper, then gently, softly, touched my head. I held my breath because this had gotten waaaay out of my experience and pay grade, but at this point I was beyond fear. I thought.
When Good Fellow exploded in rage, yeah, that was a moment when I thought death was going to have to assemble the bits before I could get hauled off. Somehow, I was on my knees, babbling and crying, apologizing to them.
"I'm sorry! Oh, Good Neighbor, I'm so, so damn sorry, I tried so hard and I'm sorry I failed-" I barely knew what I was saying, didn't dare to look up at them because that level of anger was nothing a human could endure.
"Hush, gardener. I have no wrath towards you." They touched my shoulder, guiding me back to the withy nest. "Go make tea, bring it here, and wait. Quickly, now!"
Huh. I dashed inside and made my favourite tea, the one with all the spices and dried fruit that tasted like a summer afternoon. I put together the best tea tray I could do on no notice. You can bet there was NO iron anywhere near that tray, and only the very best of what I had available. Not that I knew what was going on, but when in doubt, make it the fanciest setting you have. Especially when dealing with a gang of pissed off fae.
Setting up the tea things soothed my soul, as always. The moon had just started to rise, and the lightning bugs were dancing across the yard, among the herbs and flowers. Almost midsummer, one of the holy days of the year, one of my favorites. If it hadn't been for the circumstances, it would've been a wonderful scene, the tea party in the garden, under the moonlight.
The fae kept up their commentary as I set the low table, arranged the refreshments and tea things, some of them gathering flowers to deck the table, and the chair, and my hair. It was sweet, just like so many other times I'd served tea for them here, and yes, it made my eyes water a bit, knowing that I wasn't going to be here for them.
This time, their sudden silence was like an indrawn breath. Good Fellow poked me in the ribs, whispering to me, "best to kneel now, gardener. The Nobles are here."
It was a rushing of wind, almost like an echo of a great procession, with horses and strange hounds and beasts beyond description, and the Lords and Ladies of the Faery Court filling my cottage garden, a scene both awesome and terrifying. My heart was straining, and I tried to keep myself calm, figuring if I died in front of the Nobles they might consider that a bit rude.
"So you're the mortal gardener Goodfellow mentioned. Look up at Us, human child."
The voice was utterly inhuman and I couldn't have disobeyed it if I wanted to. Silk was rough in comparison, honey sour and bitter compared to that voice. It was birdsong and thunder, and sweet budding flowers and the ageless depths of creation, all at once.
The Queen and King of Faery were there, looking down at me. I can't describe them, because there are no good words for it. Just that they were ancient, and Noble, and they held all things within them for good or ill, and as long as I live nothing will ever compare to the way they looked down at me, with care and compassion far beyond mortal comprehension, and even affection for me, for this dying scrap of life giving them their due obeisance. Had they asked it, I would have done anything for them, without a second thought or a moment's delay.
Things got... strange then. Time does weird things around the Fae, and it's worse, a thousand times worse around the Court and the Queen and King. I know I served tea. I know there was conversation, and a discussion about the foreclosure, and the banks and all. There was a moment when They took a hair from my head, wrapping it around Their finger, so They could actually come inside my house to see how I lived, and there was much questioning about everything, touching and tasting and examining it all. It was like a dream, but one of those dreams that feel more real than being awake and where everything has meaning.
I woke up in the garden, in the nest. The sun sparkled on the dew as it rose, the sunrise full of joy and promise. I was bewildered for a moment, trying to remember how I'd gotten out here, and saw that I had been wrapped in a cloak of strange, beautiful material, stuff I'd never seen before. Unlike the rest of the garden, I wasn't covered in dew, I was dry, and warm.
"hssst!"
Goodfellow grinned at me, and waved me towards the house. "Do you go in now, and wait. News is coming!"
Well, you know the rest. The collapse of the major banks, the prosecution of the CEOs of most of the financial institutions. The way the world changed, profoundly and strangely. It's been an adjustment for everyone, even me.
But I still get to serve tea in my garden.
Some fairies have taken residence on your property, and have grown fond of you, as much as those with such alien morals can. And they are not happy when the bank tried to foreclose on you.
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msfbgraves · 2 months ago
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Et Tu, NPO?
OK. Now I am pissed. I trusted you, Dutch public broadcasting. I did. Silly me. I understood that 75% of your streaming was by subscription. And I decided not to go for that, because you are publicly funded already. So I decided to be content with the content you graciously let us watch without additional payment. I am cheap but I know that beggars can't be choosers.
But now, halfway through a decent enough Dutch/Belgian sci-fi series, you randomly put two of your episodes behind a paywall. That, and the only British series that wasn't yet.
You are public broadcasting. What are you doing seeking rent? I don't care it's like, €5 for a month. You've already raised taxes for the bazillionth time.
So alright. Over the course of a few months, I am sure I can raise €5 that I otherwise would have spent on something mindless. I am fucking determined now. Royally pissed off. I'll reduce my water bill, walk to work for one day, find it in me to cook, sell something online I couldn't be arsed to hawk before for like 20 cents of profit. But this is coming out of your bloody tax payments. You're not getting extra money out of me, not even €5, that I would not otherwise have spent.
Yes I know that is petty. But you started this.
I am getting so sick of living in a society that has started to see me as nothing but a resource, instead of a citizen. If you don't have the money to provide streaming, fine. Don't. But this...don't flatter yourself, it's not Apple TV either. But the government is always like: "We have to pull through this together" when they fuck up, yielding ever more to corporations and taking ever more from citizens, and no, it isn't the €5, I'd have spent that on parking or some such nonsense. It's simply that there's a whole new political party promising a "New Social Contract", but it's like we're being bled cut by cut by tiny cut and it's... There's something malicious about it. Who are all these "sacrifices" for, if we're still not paying our nurses? Are these €5 meant to lure Matthijs van Nieuwkerk, a famous talk show host who was cancelled for being a notorious bully, back? I know that guy does not come cheap!
But fuck if you're getting more money from me. It is a fifty minute walk to the beach. I usually take the bus. Two walks and I'll have that money saved. Don't think I won't, either. What in the fresh hell? You're not getting extra. If you want money from me, you can tell me why and you can give me the time to reflect on whether I am willing to shell out for you. But baiting me with a story and then saying: oopsie daisy, this was a trial you did not know you were signing up for 😇🤡💩, that's pulling a Bezos. I've already paid you. Your sole mission ought to have been advancing the public good through media. Have a little integrity, you are about to ask me to fund the war against Putin "because we're all in this together". This is not how you get people to look for extra shifts to be able to afford a war bond. Not if you're screwing people over for €5.
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xxdoubledaisyxx · 2 months ago
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The presence of deadly force
Airport security whorecunt thinking she is bad approaches me and says with her "badness": This is federal property you can't do that here.
Deadly force present threatening me to not take recyclables from federal property. There you go. The government is evil and attacks people who want to recycle and make whatever money we can without having to pay income taxes to the evil ones.
They take violent actions to prevent poor people from finding any means of income provided to us by people who do in fact care. This is illegal, but the people who care are weak and afraid of people like Trump because they don't believe he is fake, like I know he is. He will not be able to do anything to hurt you and will be sold out by every last evil person in the world to save themselves and pin as much of the blame on him.
They are bad people and need to be exterminated and replaced with good ones who will know how to prevent employees from offending the Lord and having the Portland airport cursed to death.
It is my intention to find all the people that own the airplanes at the Portland airport, deal with them like any common bandit trying to take over a valuable civil resource, and then manage the airplane industry myself after I take all of their money and planes with violence killing every last one of them with military forces acting of their own free will and no command from me.
We will find the people who own the airport, and end their lives immediately, and then take all their stuff and make the airports work efficiently again.
Doesn't that sound nice?
How about we do that to all the rich people who think money will protect them from God.
I don't begrudge you your Black Person armor which allows you to raise your Black card and suddenly have all the world open before you with a racial interested group of militant criminals willing break any law or violate any right to help Black card carriers with no respect for civil dignity or human rights of non-Blacks.
As a white person who is poor, I cannot hire an attorney. They have to be appointed to me after I am arrested, or already set up a scheme to profit of government inefficiency like a VA attorney.
Any sort of justice or civil complaints against injustice like the threats from mindless, evil whorecunts at the airport thinking federal ground is sovereign apart from state ground in Portland, are impossible to white people who are poor.
There is no way I could possibly get help because everyone is lazy, apathetic, and truly not-racist. Black people made problems a zillion times worse by mobilizing as a militant race group, and now there are absolutely no civil liberties left for anyone else because Black people betrayed everyone by pretending like they were victims and lying like malingering fake Christs.
Jelly, me? Naw, you just don't know how privileged you Black people are to have embarrassed yourselves so much to complain and cry the way you did while being totally oblivious to the problems happening in the world that are more important than your self-pity and inadequacy as criminal failures.
I generally do not belong to anyone. That's what it means to be a master. I have no affiliation, no ties, no obligation, no responsibility, nor any sort of oath to adhere to for my power.
I would never join a race identifying group of my skin color the way Black people do.
I suppose that's what makes white people different.
You think I have privilige? To be a disabled vet unable to work and having to find some way to survive for 5 years while the USA government does everything they can to make that claim process inefficient, painful, and slow. To be given just enough money to not pay any of my bills except maybe a few small ones before they shut off utilities, and have everything inaccessible to you because of cost while they mock you for being grumpy or stressed without any joy in life or way to socialize because it's too expensive.
Naw... that's not privilege. You people don't know the value of a dollar.
Well... let's see I'm about $200k in debt, my credit score dropped about 250 points, My bank accounts are zeroed, all my credit cards maxed so that they are now useless, and all life savings have been expended.
Family? People like me are never loved by family. A brother will give me money but not because he loves me, because he is my brother and not evil. That's all. What's your excuse Uncle Sam?
What good is it to help me live another month in shelter if they are just going to evict me the next month?
Naw... I'd rather break something important and stop the entire world to solve my problem because it is more important than anything else considering the way circumcision is still around, a selfish and vile abomination that can wait always last and never be helped.
What I find unthinkable is that they haven't sent an agent to untangle this situation and have me back in normal life in five minutes. It'd be extremely easy considering that the mistake is unforgivable and must be corrected. You will understand if you think about what is at stake if you don't.
The problem only gets worse because they are avoiding that which is only further evidence of what the problem is.
Seriously. Why is there not an agent who could have helped me transition back into civilian life if I was such a problem as to have been declared a terrorist and have the entire department of defense mobilized to strike down any people who are friendly to Nick Bylotas.
Whatever. I can fight my own battles, unlike you, United States of America.
Okay... deep breath. Black America... the problem you are suffering is not racial, it is injustice because politicians do not want to play by the rules of Democracy because they are afraid of betraying the people who bought them.
That is an injustice problem in America because of ignorance that has occurred because that very same government chose to omit traditional subject matter from public education that would have prevented this lapse in common sense and civil responsibility.
Thus... Black America... the world is not racist against Black people. We are not. Do not let anyone let you believe otherwise or they are trying to get under your skin where you want them for some reason. I don't know, maybe a demon trap of some sort, or a sexy game, it doesn't matter. The point is, that America is the center of the World on purpose. This was the plan all along and why Freedom and Democracy is so important here. That's also why attacking the problem with a racial offense is not going to help.
I humbly recommend you mobilize for another expression of human passion that is more appropriate to the dignity of American citizens.
Your mistake, as well as the mistake of women, is forgiveable and normal. The mistake of the USA government is not.
All that matters is how you grow in wisdom from what you learned about the passion of the last decade if you expressed your own in some way that left you reconsidering your life choices. I did. I totally changed once I left the military because I made the same mistake.
A forgiveable one does not need attention, an unforgiveable one does, because that is how what is unforgiveable becomes forgiveable.
The idea of thinking of Gentiles and Jews in a playful story sense as animals or background characters helping is what it means when Jesus says you will not be forgiven if you betray the spirit. You aren't supposed to use the way of the story to be mean to each other in an evil way, which is what makes circumcision a problem different than any other.
That is why that is evil, and things like tattoos and piercings are not. Those things can be evil, but the problem is not ever anywhere near as significant or dangerous as circumcision when a generation forgets and the next generation suffers for the sins of their fathers.
To address those unforgiveable sins is to apologize for the mistake of judgement and then move on, and sin like the abuse of the way of the story as I mentioned is a sin against God that is not ever forgotten. It comes back cyclically in a mysterious way ever more painful and distressing until finally the sinner cannot take anymore and seeks forgiveness simply to stop suffering what is unnecessary to suffer and ceaseless!
If you enjoy pain, then seek pain in pleasure, not sin. Seek pain in discipline, not power. Seek pain in art, not love.
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