#all in all I've been doing really well these days

[slytherinshua]

꩜　EMOTIONS OVER LAUNDRY　( 최연준 )

genre hurt/comfort , parent au , husband!yeonjun x fem!reader   cw they have a newborn daughter , mention of struggling to conceive , yeonjun crying , small mention of postpartum/newborn anxiety , not proofread   wc 917   request 🥟 anon for yeonjun + folded laundry for the 3k event   note still in my txt era so bad and also yeonjun :( our healing i love him so much he would be such a good dad </3 i've been listening to love sailing by cha eunwoo the entire time while writing this and i am NOT okay it's 3 am and i may cry   net @kstrucknet @moadiarynet

You didn’t expect to come home to see your husband crying while folding laundry. At first, you thought something must be seriously wrong. Yeonjun was always fairly emotional, but you hadn’t seen him cry since you gave birth to your baby girl Yejin two weeks ago. He wasn’t one to cry over little things, and the tears only started falling when he was stressed or upset or overwhelmed with emotion. Seeing his red nose and puffy eyes sitting in the middle of the living room floor took you off guard. 

“Honey, what’s wrong?” You were holding your newborn in one arm and shrugging off your jacket with the other, eyes glancing over your baby’s face once again. 

The new mother anxiety was something you had somewhat anticipated and prepared for. But just how anxious and paranoid you were over your newborn child still surprised you. It was like if you took your eyes off of her for more than ten seconds, something horrible was bound to happen to her. Your mind was put at ease to find her still sleeping soundly in your arms. The walk around the newbourhood in her stroller had tired her out, and carrying her back inside did nothing to wake her.

Your husband looked up at you with fresh tears in his eyes and a pout on his lips, sniffing quietly. You walked over to where he was sitting, gently transferring Yejin to her newborn rocker where she could continue napping safely. Then, you turned to your husband and raised an eyebrow as if to reiterate your previous question without verbally stating it again. 

“It’s nothing, just…” Yeonjun trailed off with a sigh, a light pink baby onesie on one of his hands. The garment was so small compared to him. Even the small stacks of neatly folded clothes looked tiny, although it was nearly half your daughter’s wardrobe. 

“She’s so small,” Yeonjun whispered, another tear rolling down his cheek. Immediately, you understood exactly where all the emotions were coming from. It happened to you a few times as well when Yejin was particularly cute or you remembered just how long you and Yeonjun had tried for a child, all the struggle it took to get to this point. It was all worth it for her, your perfect little bundle of joy. Even looking at her brought a smile to your face. Even though it had been hard, for her, you would do it all again in a heartbeat. 

“And—and, I was folding her clothes, and they’re all just so small, just like her. And she’s so, so cute, and she’s really ours. It doesn’t feel real that she’s finally here. Sometimes I think I’ll wake up one day and realize this was all a dream, like we’re back a few years ago still trying for her,” Yeonjun breathed, words mumbled in his choked up voice. 

You shifted closer to him, brushing a hand up and down his back as he leant into your touch. With how often Yeonjun had comforted you and wiped your tears away during pregnancy, now it was your turn to do the same for him. 

You had taken it hard back then. Every negative test, every piece of false hope, every month that went by without progress; your husband was there to comfort you through it all. He stayed firm and strong when you weren’t able to. You knew he had been holding back his own feelings on it for you, not wanting to show how much it affected him too. You’d be blind to not see how much it was hurting him as well. He had always wanted a family just as much as you had, and you knew just how happy he was to have finally been able to start one. 

It was just an emotional journey. 

Yeonjun fully rested his head on your shoulder, warm tears dripping onto your shirt. You didn’t mind. You just continued to stroke his back, reaching out to hold one of his hands and giving it a reassuring squeeze. Yeonjun couldn’t stay strong forever. Although it had been two weeks since you came home from the hospital, it felt like today was the first time you truly got to relax and breathe. Caring for a newborn was nonstop, and you were both running on sleepless nights and parenting anxiety. You worked through it like you did anything, though. As long as you had each other, you were sure things would turn out okay. 

“I’m sorry,” Yeonjun whispered after minutes of silence. “I didn’t mean to get so emotional all of a sudden.” He pulled back from the hug and sent you a small smile, assuring you silently that he was okay, that those small moments of comfort were all he needed. He carefully folded the small onesie he was still holding and placed it on top of the stack of other similar ones. 

Leaning over the baby rocker, he smiled brightly at his daughter. Still sleeping soundly without a care in the world, wrapped up in a soft yellow onesie. Her hands were balled into little tiny fists, so small that they could barely wrap around Yeonjun’s thumb. 

He brushed a few fingers over Yejin’s head and soft wispy strands of hair. It was peaceful watching her sleep, and a feeling of reassurance washed over Yeonjun. He was her dad, and he loved her more than anything in the world. He’d sacrifice everything for her— his perfect little angel. 

txt taglist (bolded could not be tagged): @kangtaehyunzzz,, @eternalgyu,, @90steele,, @ddeonudepressions,, @cham3li,, @wolfmoonmusic,, @98-0603,, @weird-bookworm,, @candewlsy,, @blossominghunnie,, @amara-mars,, @wccycc,, @seunghancore,, @ujisworld,, @sobun1est,, @bananabubble,, @talkingsaxy,, @sxmmerberries,, @talking-saxy,, @nicholasluvbot,, @cupidslovearrows,, @50-husbands,, @hursheys,, @stannwjnss,, @gong-fourz,, @nonononranghaee,, @forever-atiny,, @stantxtforabetterlife,, @loserlvrss,, @lexeees,, @cupidslovearrows,, @hyukabean,, @nicholasluvbot,, @i03jae

[princesseilish]

Heyy babyy, been missing u and I have a request that i've been thinking about actually and you're the only person that came to mind. (Always thinkin about u)

Probably Billie saying goodbye for the tour and reassuring her daughter or probably y/n leaving to run some errands and having Billie all the responsibility with the two kids.

You choose cause I can't make up my mind actually :/

(imissyousomuch and iloveyouwifey💋)

LULLABY

Billie Eilish x Fem!Reader

Warnings: crying, fluff, no use of cursing, that’s it? i think?

Synopsis: Billie is leaving for her first show, for tour, and she has never been away from her daughter for that long

A/N: Hii my love, i miss you too, like more than you’ll ever know

The night before Billie left for her Hit Me Hard and Soft tour, Rosie was inconsolable. The little girl, usually so full of energy and speaking in hyperbole, was now a sobbing mess, clinging to Billie like her life depended on it.

“Mommy, don’t go,” she hiccupped, her tiny hands gripping Billie’s hoodie, refusing to let go.

Billie, sitting on the edge of their bed with Rosie in her lap, sighed softly and kissed the top of her daughter’s head. “Bug, you know I have to, but I promise I’ll call you all the time, okay? And I’ll be home before you even know it.”

Rosie wasn’t convinced. Her big brown eyes, already puffy from crying, welled up again as she buried her face into Billie’s chest. “But—but what if I miss you too much?”

Y/n, sitting beside them, gently rubbed Rosie’s back. “You’re gonna miss Mommy, and that’s okay, baby. But I’ll be here, and we’ll do fun things while she’s away. And she will call us every day.”

Rosie sniffled. “Can I sleep with you tonight?”

Y/n and Billie shared a look. It had been a while since Rosie crawled into their bed—she was getting older, becoming more independent. But tonight? Tonight, she needed them.

“Of course, bug,” Billie murmured, lifting Rosie up and laying her between them.

That night, Billie softly hummed a lullaby, just like she had since Rosie was a baby. It was second nature at this point—the soft, familiar tune drifting through the dark room, soothing her little girl into sleep. Y/n watched as Rosie finally calmed, her little hands tucked under Billie’s hoodie.

But now, Billie was gone. She had already played a few shows, and it had been two weeks since she left for Québec. And ever since then, Rosie had been… off.

At first, y/n thought it was just normal separation sadness. But then she started noticing the signs—Rosie was restless, struggling to fall asleep, waking up in the middle of the night and wandering into y/n’s room with tired, teary eyes.

And then, one night, when y/n walked by Rosie’s room, she found her daughter curled up in bed, her little lip trembling, eyes squeezed shut.

“Baby?” y/n whispered, kneeling beside the bed.

Rosie peeked one eye open, barely holding back her tears.

“What’s wrong, lovebug?”

Rosie hesitated before whispering, “I can’t sleep, Mommy. I can’t… without Mommy’s song.”

And that’s when it hit y/n—Billie’s lullaby. It had been part of Rosie’s nighttime routine for years, and now, without it, she couldn’t settle.

Y/n felt a pang of guilt. She hadn’t realized how much Rosie needed it.

She sat on the bed, brushing Rosie’s curls back. “Baby… why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

Rosie’s tiny hands played with the edge of her blanket. “Didn’t wanna make you sad.”

Y/n’s heart broke.

“Oh, my love,” she murmured, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “she would never want you to go without your lullaby, okay?”

Rosie sniffled. “But she’s busy.”

Y/n didn’t hesitate. She grabbed her phone and quickly dialed Billie, praying she wasn’t too caught up in something.

It only rang twice before Billie’s tired but warm voice came through.

“Hey, baby.”

Y/n sighed in relief. “Hey, love. Are you busy?”

“Not really, just chilling after soundcheck. Everything okay?”

Y/n turned to Rosie, who was already scooting closer to the phone. “Bug, someone wants to talk to you.”

Rosie hesitated before whispering, “Mommy?”

Billie’s voice immediately softened. “Hi, bug.”

And just like that, the dam broke. Rosie’s little lip quivered as she curled into y/n’s lap, gripping the phone with her small hands.

“I miss you,” she whimpered.

Billie let out a soft breath. “Oh, baby, I miss you so much too.”

Rosie sniffled. “I can’t sleep.”

Y/n heard Billie shift on the other end, as if sitting up straighter. “You can’t?”

Rosie shook her head before realizing Billie couldn’t see her. “No. I need Mommy’s song.”

There was a brief pause, then Billie’s voice came through, gentle and soothing.

“You want me to sing it for you, bug?”

“Please,” Rosie whispered.

And without hesitation, Billie started humming the lullaby. The same tune she had sung to Rosie since she was a baby.

Y/n watched as Rosie’s body slowly relaxed, her tiny fingers loosening their grip on the phone. Her breathing evened out, her eyelashes fluttering as sleep finally took over.

Billie kept humming, even after Rosie had drifted off completely.

Y/n brought the phone back to her ear, keeping her voice low. “Thank you, baby.”

Billie sighed. “I hate being away from her.”

“I know,” y/n whispered. “She loves you so much.”

Billie was quiet for a moment before she said, “I’ll record it. The lullaby. So if she needs it again, she won’t have to wait for me.”

Y/n smiled, warmth spreading through her chest. “She’d love that.”

They stayed on the phone for a little while longer, Billie listening to Rosie’s soft, steady breathing.

And even though she was miles away, in a different city, in a different time zone—Billie was still right there where she belonged.

[ghost-askblog]

(Please read <3)

hey everyone! its been a bit hasn't it...

i've still been popping in here and there and i'm honestly so glad this whole hate train fiasco has finally come to a much needed close (for the most part) and watching all of these new ask blogs flourish since then has been so insanely heart warming for me. i'm so glad to see you all doing well!

during my break i've come to terms with just how much i really needed it and feeling the weight of everything off my shoulders whether it being the overwhelming feeling of obligation to get to everyone's asks and make everyone happy really got to me in the long run more than i'd like to admit. story of a people-pleaser's life, i suppose.

it makes me so happy and honestly fucking gobsmacked to this day to be reminded that this amazing community got revived by just a weird cod obsessed freshly turned 18 year old highschooler that simply wanted to have fun and make friends with people of a like interest. crazy how life works, innit?

during this period of taking time to myself and reflecting off of what really happened i've decided not to continue this blog for the sake of myself and my own mental health. in spite of this i'm still so insanely grateful of how much love and support i have been getting even during my hiatus and for that i love you all sooo so much <33

i'm not going to completely disappear, and i certainly won't stop using tumblr (for the foreseeable future, anyways.) and i highly encourage you to have fun and interact with many of the other ghost ask blogs that came to be during my break, or just any new blogs in general that decided to join this silly little community of like-minded individuals that just want to have fun role playing their favorite characters in the cod community.

if you'd still like to interact with me, then please feel more than welcome to do so. i won't be tagging my main outright but just know if you find it, it's there for you.

most importantly, i want to thank all of the original ask blogs that derived from mine, especially after my spike in popularity that honestly shocked me as well. damn near 1k followers in a span of 2 months is baffling already as it is, especially to someone like me that didn't have much of an internet presence as it is.

and with that said, hi! i'm francis, better known as fran, and i'm the young fella behind this blog! i recently turned 18 in october and i'm finishing my final year of high school. i love my friends so so so much and honestly i wouldn't even be nearly where i am if it wasn't for them. i'm currently involved in a dual-enrollment program to get my associates degree in criminal psychology and my favorite color is red! i am a huge video game and movie geek, having rewatched the entire marvel timeline more times than i can count, as well as having a love for indie and thriller/horror elemented story games. (fnaf, tlou, mouthwashing, resident evil, silent hill, just to name a few)

this has been so much fun, and i thank you all for staying with me this long. i'm eternally grateful❤️

—this was fran, signing off with a brand new video game in hand and a good long exhale of relief.

go follow these guys they're fucking awesome

@askthemactav @shadow-5-05 @shadow-2-08 @itsvargen @krueger-acc @brav0six @ask-private-141 @konigisking @justradiospirit @ask-corporaltwins-141 @verytiredmedic @callsign-king @shadow5-7 @captain-after-dark @lieutenant-banks @b1gm0n3yb1gg3rc4n3 @callsign-cups @alejandro-ask @el-perro-rabiosa @callsign-kits @price-askblog @keegan-askblog @generalshepherd-askblog @gaz-askblog @ask-alex-keller @valera-askblog @ask-roachsanderson @jeanzoriley-cod @ask-gaz @ask-soapmactavish @ask-phillip-graves @johnprice-asks @ask-philgraves @ask-lieutriley

oh, and to all of these rp blog tags? allow me the grace of being your 🧟‍♀️ anon (iykyk)

[eddiemunsonspantschain]

The key is... - E.M

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Reader

Word Count: 7.5 k

Warnings: Extreme pining, kissing, handjob, oral (m&f recieving), spit kink, Reader swallows, choking, not fully proofread and edited (Sorry)

Description: Eddie and reader attend a key party

Dividers from @strangergraphics (I follow your main, hi! hope you don't mind me actually tagging you on this)

Tags: I know I've been MIA for a long time so idk if anyone wants to be tagged or not but @corrodedcorpses @wroteclassicaly

The concept of a key party almost felt ridiculous. The only time you had heard about something like this was in tv shows and movies. Usually for older people too. You and all your friends were in your early to mid-twenties. Something about the party felt juvinial too. A handful of your friends dragged you there, promising it would be fun.

As soon as you got there you searched out the drink station. If you were going to even attempt this, you needed a drink. After grabbing the traditional red solo cup, you poured yourself a drink and took a large gulp. You cringed at the barely cold alcohol, the ice you tossed in not having time to really cool the drink.

"Ahem,"

You turned, shoulders sagging at the person in front of you. Heather grinned, holding a large glass bowl full of car keys. She gently shook the bowl at you, making the metal keys clink against the glass. "Don't think I idn't notice you try and hide in here. Keys, please!" she giggled, holding the bowl out to you. "It's required for the party. You know the rules. I made sure everyone knew the rules."

"Heather," you groaned, trying to give your best puppy dog eyes, but the young woman shook her head.

"Re-qui-ered," she shook the bowl again. "Look, even if your key gets picked and you head out with someone, you aren't required to do much. Remember the rules I laid out. At minimum, a little date! At most... well, that's up to you two." she giggled, a gentle smile on her face.

"A little date? Why?" you questioned, wondering why that was even made a requirement in the first place.

"Yes. And you both have to corraborate that you at least went and did something. I decided that cause this is a Valentines Day key party after all," Heather explained, "I assume since you're here that you don't have a Valentine."

Your shoulders sag. "You're right. I've never had one before, honestly. I... hate the holiday. Hence, this," you admitted quietly, holding up your cup before taking a swig again with a wince.

"You aren't the only one here who's said that to me. You never know. You might like who you get." Once again, Heather shook the bowl. "Keys?"

You sigh, reaching into your jacket pocket and fishing out your keys. A skull keychain was the only thing adorning your keys. You dropped the keys into the bowl. "There, my ticket is in."

"Perfect!" Heather held the bowl with one hand, using her other to mix the keys around so yours disappeared into the pile. "We'll be starting soon. Report to the living room in about thirty minutes!" With that, Heather turned and disappeared to harrass other party goers for their keys.

Just as Heather promised, thirty minutes later everyone still there participating was called to the living room. There seemed to be some keys missing from the bowl, probably people who paired up before the drawing even happened. The mix of people in the room was interesting. Young adults from all over Hawkins from different cliques from back in school, even some individuals back from college for a time.

"Hello everyone! Thanks for coming to my little get together where I hope some of you guys get together!" Heather grinned with a wink. "So, the way this goes is simple. A volunteer comes up, picks out a key, and they go with the key owner. At minimum, you guys go on a little date. Can be to grab a bite to eat, a skinny dip in lovers lake, or hell even just a walk together. At most, you can do whatever you both want to each other. Consensually. Don't be a prick." Heather explained, looking around the room. "Okay, who's going first?"

"I'll do it." Steve got up from his seat, not to anyone's surprise.

"Shocker, Dingus." Robin laughed, shaking her head at him.

Steve approached the bowl, sticking his hand in and fishing around as he looked up at the ceiling. He pulled a set of keys out, a tiny heart keychain hanging from the ring alongside a large flower keychain of a daisy. He turned, showing the keys to the room.

A small voice spoke up from the couch. "Uh, those are mine..." Chrissy held her hand up. She set her beer on the coffee table, standing up and scooting past her friends to Steve.

"Ready to head outta here?" Steve asked with a smile, handing the girl her keys back.

A light blush dusted over the strawberry blonde's cheeks. "Yeah, yeah!" she nodded, grabbing her purse and jacket before the two left for the night.

"Perfect! Who's next?" Heather grinned, shaking the bowl of keys.

A few more people picked out keys, making the pickings smaller and smaller. Then there were no more volunteers. Heather looked around the room and hummed. "If no one is gunna volunteer then I'm gonna start calling people out," she warned, surverying the remaining partiers. After a moment of silence, she decided it was enough. "Munson!" Heather grinned, holding out the bowl. "Come pick."

Everyone looked at Eddie. A few party goers whispered and snickered to one another. You rolled your eyes. You guys had all been out of high school for a few years now, yet it seemed some people couldn't grow up. For a moment, it seemed like Eddie was going to wuss out. Instead, he tossed back what was left in his cup before setting it aside. He walked up to the bowl and stuck his hand in. Clinking was heard but you weren't sure if it was the keys moving around or his rings hitting all the other metal.

Eddie finally picked his keys, turning and holding up a set of keys... with a skull keychain on it. Heather looked at you and grinned, the others glancing at one another for a moment as they didn't know whose keys they were.

"Robin, don't tell me these are yours." Eddie laughed, eyeing his grinning friend.

"Oh no, those have car keys on them. I don't drive, remember? Guess again!" Robin laughed with a shake of her head.

"Actually, those are mine." you spoke up, stepping away from the wall and towards the metalhead. You held your hand out patiently for your keys.

"You up for this?" Eddie asked, dropping your keys into your palm.

"Rules are rules. Let's go?" you turned, heading towards the door.

Now, you weren't afraid of Eddie. You never took anything anyone said about him seriously. It was all just judgemental bullshit. He didn't fit the mold they wanted, so naturally they thought something was wrong with him. You never did. A nerd? Sure, but there wasn't anything wrong with that. You found it cute, actually. Especially when Robin would tell you about their latest 'nerd-scapades' as she called them. Eddie did make you nervous though. He's handsome. Incredibly handsome, adorable, hot. It was never something you thought about persuing though. You assumed you weren't his type and that if he had any interest, he would have made a move. It wasn't like you both didn't know one another. You did through your mutual friendship with Robin from band and with Nancy on the school paper when you all attended together. You had also spoken to him yourself before, when he checked out books at the library in high school. You had helped with sorting book returns and had talked about books with Eddie before.

As soon as you both got outside, Eddie headed for his van. You followed behind him since your friends had driven you all there. "I can drop you at home." Eddie finally spoke, making you stop in your tracks.

"What?" Was he serious?

"I said, I can drop you off at home. Your friends drove, right?" Eddie looked at you, a brow raised.

"Well, yeah, they did but what about our date?" you asked, now even more confused.

"Oh, that," Eddie chuckled, "I figured we'd just make something up. I take you home, we tell Heather that we... I dunno, watched a movie or something and that's it. No biggie."

"No biggie?" you scoffed, hands finding home on your hips as you stared at him.

"Shit, I said something wrong didn't I?"

You felt a pang of irritation. "Look, I know I'm no Chrissy Cunningham or Heather for that matter, but if you really didn't wanna go on a date with me at least say so?" you turned away from Eddie, heading towards the direction of your house.

"That isn't what I meant!" Eddie called out to you, but you kept walking. You heard his boots crunching on the asphalt as he ran to catch up to you. "I assumed, okay? Will you stop walking?"

"You know what they say when you assume..." you murmured, trying to ignore him.

"You make an ass out of you and me," he finished.

"That's how it goes but this time, just you."

"Bunny, please."

You stopped in your tracks and turned to look at him. "Bunny?" you ask.

Eddie smirks, feeling victorious he got your attention. "Yeah, it's cute." he shrugged, "Will you come back to the van?"

You stared at him for a moment, silence stretched between you. "I want french fries." you demanded, starting back towards his van. You heard him following after you and when you got to the van you climbed into his passenger seat.

The van itself was messy, but then again so was your car. Similarly to yours, Eddie had random receipts and other papers tossed down onto the floor of the passenger side. A couple random items tossed around the center console ranging from a pack of cigarettes to a couple of loose dice. As Eddie climbed in to join you, the whole van shook with the force of him closing his door. "Fries, huh?" Eddie asked and you nodded.

"Fries and a soda. It's all I ask, then you can take me home if you really want to," you answer, buckling up. You didn't flinch as Eddie's music blased through the stereo once the car was on, watching him turn the dial down anyway before pulling away from Heather's house.

The diner was a little more busy than usual, probably considering the holiday. You slid into a booth across from Eddie, not bothering with the menu. Eddie didn't pick one up either. A waiter was there quickly, asking what you both wanted.

"A Coke and some fries, please," you ordered with a small smile.

"A burger combo with a Coke," Eddie ordered, a set of straw being dropped onto the table once your orders were scribbled down and then the waiter was gone. "Surprised you don't have a date already." Eddie finally spoke up after a few minutes.

You picked up your straw, starting to strip the paper off of it when he spoke. "You need someone to like you to have a date, Eddie." you chuckle, balling up the paper from your straw and flicking it towards him.

Eddie reached out, flicking the paper ball back at you. "I'm sure plenty of people like you, bunny." he murmured.

You raised a brow, making binoculars with your hands and holding them up to your eyes.

"What're you doing?" Eddie laughed.

"Oh, I'm looking for the people who said they liked me. Cause I sure as hell can't find 'em." you said, looking around the diner like that.

"Well I know one for sure." Eddie shrugged.

You dropped your hands, brows furrowed as you looked at him. "Who?" you ask, but he shakes his head. "Eddie!"

"I'm not giving it up that easily." he laughed, "you at least are getting food with me, that's a start. I expect this information to gently be coaxed from me."

"You're a dork."

"Yes, I am." Eddie grinned, "Tell you what, you come back to the trailer with me to watch a movie, like I said we were fake going to... and then I'll tell you."

You watched him for a moment, tilting your head to the side. "What's in it for you?" you ask, just as your sodas as placed down. You stick your straw into the sugary drink and take a sip, savoring it more than the cocktail at the party. If you could call it that.

"You'll find out." Eddie murmured, taking a sip of his drink.

It didn't take long for you both to eat your food. You would've thought Eddie hadn't eaten all day the way he inhaled a burger. You finished your fries in a timely manner before trying to pay for the food. Eddie protested, trying to snatch the bill from you.

"You're hosting the movies and, I assume, drinks and snacks for it. So I'm getting this!" you argue, slipping a few bills into the leather folder and holding it away from Eddie's reach.

"I don't have much at home, so we'll stop at a gas station or something. Brat." Eddie mumbled, but a soft smile was spread over his lips.

You both returned to his van, only driving a few minutes before stopping at a convenience store. You immediately gravitated to the candy aisle. "Eddie, what's your favorite?" you call out to him.

"Anything chocolate, but also red licorice!" he called back from somewhere in the store. "Favorite drink?" he called back.

"Cherry Coke!" you call out, grabbing a bag of M&M's. You also grabbed some Red Vines, Milk Duds, gummy bears and stovetop popcorn.

Eddie came around the corner of the aisle, carrying a bottle of cherry Coke for you and some Sprite. "Think we got a good enough spread?" he chuckled, eyeing your full arms.

"Yes, yes I do. We're gonna have a sugar rush." you laugh, heading for the counter. You sat all the candy down, nudging Eddie when he stopped beside you and put the sodas on the counter. The clerk started to ring them up, eyeing the assortment of candy. You looked around, taking in all the advertisements.

Eddie reached into a bin beside him on the floor, flowers sticking out of it for the holiday. He pulled out a singular wrapped rose, placing it on the counter. The candy and soda was bagged up, Eddie handing a few bills over as you grabbed the bags. You pause, eyeing the flower. Eddie picked it up, before taking your hand and tugging you outside. Your palm and fingers tingled where you and Eddie's skin touched, making your hand feel warm.

He unlocked the van, opening the passenger door for you. You set down the bags on the floor of the passenger seat, turning back to Eddie as the rose was presented to your face. "No girl should go on a Valentine's date and not get a flower," he murmured.

The rose itself was struggling to stay alive. Who knows how long it had been there. The petals weren't perfect, a bit of brown to them, but you didn't care. Your cheeks warmed as you took the flower from him. "Eddie," you murmur, stepping closer and wrapping your arms around his middle. You laid your head on his chest, trying to ignore the feeling in your chest and the slight burning in your eyes.

Eddie froze, feeling his heart thud hard and fast in his chest. He prayed you couldn't hear or feel it with your head on his chest. He wrapped his arms around you, tempted to say 'it's just a flower, bunny'. Then he remember you telling Heather you'd never had a Valentine before. He didn't mean to snoop. He had just wanted another beer. It just felt funny how he had said the same thing to Heather not an hour ago when he had gotten to her house. He rubbed your back for a moment before loosening his hold. "C'mon, lets get to my place." he held the door open as you let go of him and slid into the van again.

The trailer was cozy, in your opinion. As soon as you were in there, Eddie was running around trying to clean up. You ignored him as you surveryed all the hats and mugs on the wall. You eyed the fold up bed in the corner, no doubt for his uncle. You moved into the kitchen, ignoring Eddie running around you as you started to unpack everything, leaving your rose on the counter. The bottles of soda got slid into the fridge and you took the paper off of the stovetop popcorn. You found a large bowl to dump the popcorn into and started to cook it up on the stove.

"If the phone rings, don't answer it." Eddie joked from behind you as you heard more empty cans clink into the garbage can.

"Oh? What's the wrost that could happen?" you played along, wanting to see what he'd say.

A warmth pressed against your back and it took you a moment to realize Eddie was pressed against you. His hands slid onto your hips and you felt his hair tickle your neck as he leaned in. "Because there might be a psycho on the other end with just one question: what's your favorite scary movie?" Eddie murmured into your ear, trying to impersonate the Ghostface voice.

A shiver ran through you and you reminded yourself to shake the popcorn as it started to pop. "Personally?" you answer, turning your head to look at Eddie. You hear his breath hitch when you do, your faces barely an inch apart. You'd hardly have to lean to kiss him if you wanted to... and you kind of did. "I do love Scream. Billy and Stu are very hot, but Saw has a special place in my heart." you grin, glancing down at Eddie's full lips before tearing your eyes away and looking back at the stovetop.

"S-Saw, huh?" Eddie swallowed hard, trying to remember how to breathe and not just press you against this counter and mark up your neck like you decided to go necking with a vampire.

"I like the gore and the concept. Obviously, the first one is the best, but the third has a special place in my heart too." you go on, finishing the popcorn. You carefully unwrap it, dumping the popcorn into the bowl and scooping out any unpopped kernals you come across.

"Which Scream is best?" Eddie asked, gently squeezing your hips before letting go.

"The first, of course. Can't beat the original. And Stu is absolutely alive."

Eddie scoffed. "A TV fell on his head, bunny."

"So?" you laugh, turning to face Eddie. "He could just be horribly disfigured."

"Would you still find him hot then? Even if he looked like a stitched up mess?"

"Mm, yeah. He's got personality. Funny, eccentric. It's hot. Reminds me of you, really, when you're joking around with Hellfire."

Eddie put his hand on his chest, a sly grin spreading across his face. "You callin me hot, bunny?"

You pick up the bowl of popcorn and grab the candy. "Pour us some sodas, stud." you laugh, heading to the living room. You set the bowl down first before sitting down to open up all the candy.

Eddie came back with two glasses, setting yours down first before his. He sat down next to you, keeping a respectable distance as he grabbed the remote. Seeing as how you both had similar taste in movies, you decided to trust Eddie with his possible picks. He settled on My Bloody Valentine. "Feels appropriate almost," he commented, sitting back on the couch and tucking himself in the corner at the arm of the chair.

"It does," you answer, picking up the popcorn. You slide your shoes off, tucking your feet under you as the movie starts. Through the movie, you offer the bowl of popcorn to Eddie who snags handfuls. Occasionally he leans over to grab candy too. He eventually picked up the package of Red Vines and sits back with them.

You suddenly decide the way you're sitting is uncomfortable. You move your drink closer to Eddie's and grab the M&M's, taking the bowl of popcorn with you as you slide closer to him. Eddie side eyes you, but says nothing as you move his arm to tuck into his side with your legs laying on the couch towards the spot you just abandoned. You set the bowl of popcorn on your lap and the M&M's at your side.

You continue snacking, surprised that Eddie says nothing about you deciding to cuddle up to him. He just wordlessly grabs a couple kernels of popcorn. After a few minutes, you reach over and swipe a Red Vine from the packet. You stick one end into your mouth.

"Theif." Eddie murmurs and you giggle.

"It's just a Red Vine, Teddy."

Eddie's cheeks flare red at the nickname. "It's my Red Vine." he argues back, trying to ignore the butterflies in his stomach.

"Sharing is caring." you counter, taking a bite from the Red Vine now. You hold up the rest to him. "I'm sorry," you playfully pout at him. Eddie leans in, taking a bite from the licorice.

"Finish it," he tells you, "and be thankful!"

"Thank you, sir." you grin, wiggling back against him.

The movie ends, and by then most of the popcorn is gone, your soda is finished and you both made a dent in the candy. You pull out your cherry chapstick, applying some to your lips to fight off the chapping the cold has been trying to do.

"I gotta use the bathroom, be back." Eddie told you, wiggling out from under you. You sat forward, watching him go. You set the candy and popcorn back onto the table and get up. You start cleaning up, pausing as you walk around to go into the kitchen. Ahead of you is a doorway, cracked open but you can tell it's Eddie's room. You hum, biting your lip as you think about it. You set down everything in your arms onto the counter top and start towards his room. Someone's room could tell you a lot about them. How could you resist?

You gently push the door open, sliding into his room. It's messy, but you expected that from a guy. A couple clothes sat around the laundry hamper as opposed to being inside of it, the walls were covered in posters and a large 'Corroded Coffin' banner that he clearly made. The desk was covered in notebooks, dice and small figurines. You thumbed through the open notebook, skimming over campaign notes for a D&D session. Books were scattered all over the room, from the night table to the dresser. You glanced at the night table, seeing a worn down copy of The Hobbit, an ash tray and an alarm clock.

You turned, stopping at the large mirror on the wall. You wandered over, eyeing the electric guitar hung up in front of the mirror. It didn't have the body shape you were used to seeing on a guitar. The paint job was a speckled red and black. It suited Eddie for sure. You reached out, intending to just run your fingers over the strings.

"Don't even think about it."

You jumped out of your skin hearing Eddie directly behind you. "You're fucking quiet, Jesus Christ!" you breathe, looking back at Eddie.

He had a serious look on his face. "No one touches her but me, bunny." he told you, "and you're snooping. I never said you could come in here." A smirk pulled at the corner of his mouth.

"You never said I couldn't," you countered.

Eddie grabbed your hips, pulling you away from the guitar. "Snooping around is snooping around," he answered.

"What? Got somethin to hide?" you teased, "I didn't even check under the bed yet! I bet there's dirty magazines there." You giggle and try to power over to his bed, but Eddie tightens his hold on your hips.

"Hey! No, bad girl." Eddie laughed, now wrapping his arm around your waist.

"What? I wanna know what you're into," you tease, yelping as you suddenly are lifted off of the floor.

Eddie tosses you onto his bed. "You're such a brat. Maybe I shouldn't have brought you here," he joked, pressing his knee onto his bed.

You roll over, trying to blow your hair off of your sticky lips from the chapstick. "Liar, you've had fun with you." you accuse, pointing at him.

Eddie hums, crawling onto his bed and on top of you. His left forearm holds himself up as he hovers over you, your legs tangled together. "I have had fun with you here," he admits, reaching with his right hand to pull your hair away from your lips.

"Thank you," you murmur, unsure if you mean for the compliment or helping get your hair away from your mouth.

Eddie's fingers skim your cheek before his hand gently cups it instead. "You're welcome," he murmurs, watching you.

You reach up, gently pushing his bangs from his eyes. You slide your hand down to his jaw, then his neck. You knew maybe going here was a mistake but you had been curious about the whole 'I know someone who likes you' thing. You were never the type to have a bunch of prospects in that region. You focused a lot on school, then work. You hardly were approached unlike your friends who had multiple prospects. So you were curious, but it also was dangerous since you like Eddie, too. Especially now that you got to spend time with him. It was dangerous. This was dangerous.

"Eddie," you whisper, unsure if you wanted to ask him for the information he had or ask him what you both were doing. Cuddling was one thing. Eddie looking at you like he wanted to kiss you was ano-... oh. Oh.

You gently pull at the back of his neck, trying to urge him down. Eddie complies, leaning down and pressing his lips to yours. It barely took you tugging at him for him to comply. You shivered as your lips moved with his, feeling the tingling and warmth that you had felt earlier when you held hands. Eddie groaned quietly, deepening your kiss. Your free hand moves to his chest, gently rubbing there before moving your hand down to his stomach. Eddie can't help the butterflies at your touch. You slide your hand up under his shirt, feeling the sparce scattering of hair leading down into his jeans before moving your hand farther up his stomach.

Eddie breaks the kiss with a gentle click of your lips. "Jesus Christ," Eddie breathes, "you taste like cherries. You and fucking cherries," he breathes a laugh.

"I like it!" you giggle, "Don't tell me you don't like it."

"I love it," Eddie mumbles, pressing his lips to yours again. His kiss is firmer this time, hungrier as he teases his tongue against your cherry flavored lip. You happily oblige, parting your lips to taste his tongue. At the first brush of his tongue, you try not to laugh as he tastes like mint. No doubt having scrubbed his teeth while he went to the bathroom, maybe in preparation for this. You moan, moving your hand from his neck into his hair. You gently tug, pulling a moan from him too.

You pull away this time to catch your breath. "It's you." you murmur, "The person you know that likes me. It's you."

"Fuck yeah, it's me." Eddie breathes, stealing a kiss again. "I almost died when I pulled your keys from that fucking bowl."

"So you did know they were mine?"

"Yeah. I've seen 'em before." he admitted, pressing gentle kisses to the corners of your mouth.

"Why didn't you ever-"

"I was scared, bunny." he sighs, nudging his nose against yours. "We barely talked in high school. His right hand gently brushes over your waist. "I've had a stupid crush on you since I went to check out Lord of the Flies from the library."

"So years? Eddie!" you scold, laughing as he whines and presses his head into your neck.

"I'm fucking pathetic for you, bunny. I've been a pining fool." he admits, pressing open mouthed kisses to your neck. You moan, dragging your nails over his belly.

"You should've said something forever ago, you idiot boy." you pout, tugging on his hair again.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know," Eddie mumbles, lifting his head to kiss you again. Your fingers dip back down, sneaking into the waistband of his jeans. "Jesus, fuck-mm," Eddie moans, reaching down to grab your wrist. "Dangerous game, bunny. Hold on,"

"Whyyyy?" you whine, "I wasn't doing anything!"

"I will fuck you, if you stick your hand any farther into my pants. I promise you." Eddie sternly said, watching you. Your eyes widen.

"I-uhm-you," you ramble, not sure how to wrap your head around that.

Eddie grinned. "Made you go dumb and I haven't even gotten to taste this pussy yet, damn."

Your brain malfunctions more. "Talking to me like that doesn't help." you tell him, gently pinching his stomach. He wiggles at the contact and laughs.

"Good to know you like the thought though," he wiggles his brows with a laugh. "I won't fuck you tonight, not unless you ask me very nicely."

"Teddy," you purr, seeing his smug expression fall into an almost patheitcally horny one. "Let me touch your cock, please?"

"Jesus Christ," Eddie breathes and you realize he had been holding his breath. "I don't know if I'm gonna survive."

"You will. I'll give you CPR," you giggle, trying to shake your wrist from his hold. Eddie lets your wrist go and you let go of his hair. You go for his belt, easily getting it undone. You pop the button and pull down the zipper. "Last chance to stop me," you warn.

"Never. Fucking never. Please touch me, baby, please." Eddie groans. You push his jeans and boxers down, reaching around to get them off his ass too. Eddie shifts so you can have better access to him as his erection hangs heavily between you. It's red, leaking gently at the tip begging to be touched. You sit up a bit, gathering some spit in your mouth before slowly spitting the wad into your palm. "Fuck," Eddie moans, turned on just watching you spit into your palm.

You wrap your hand around him, slowly stroking and getting his length covered in your spit. "Got plenty more spit where that came from." you told him, giving his shaft a gentle squeeze. "I'd wanna get it all over this though, taste you."

Eddie's free hand was gripping the mattress under you both, shaking as you stroked his length. You sped up, watching the way his brows furrowed in pleasure with his eyes squeezed shut. You loved how you had him in the palm of your hand. Figuratively and literally. "Your h-hands," Eddie whimpered and you grinned.

"Teddyyyy," you coo, giggling at his whine. "Have you... done this before?"

Eddie's cheeks flared red. That bit of confidence earlier melted away a little bit. "I-okay, mm fuck, I-I've not, uh. This, I've had this, but..." he trails off and you try not to get too excited at the prospect of being Eddie's first.

"So no one has taken this cock, huh? You spoke so dirty earlier I thought maybe you'd had your pick of groupies at the Hideout." you swipe your thumb over his tip and his hips twitch forward at the contact.

"I know how to talk, sweetheart. Seen enough--nevermind--to know," Eddie grabbed for your wrist again as you gave him a squeeze at his base. "Lemme fuckin think for a second, J-Jesus," he choked out, "I've had handies, been blown once... didn't last long. And yes, I've had sex before. Just... not often."

"I like it," you shrug, deciding to do as he needed and stopped stroking him so he could think. "I think it's cute that you can talk."

"I sound like a loser admitting all this." Eddie groaned, letting go of your wrist to cover his face with his hand.

"A hot loser," you giggle. "You've got a few options here. I can either keep doing this til you cum on my stomach, I can blow you ooor we can go all the way."

Eddie felt like he was being boiled alive. He felt hot all over at the options you gave him. What was the right answer? He had no fucking clue. "I'm not gonna last long in any of these situations." he admitted, "and I really, really wanna taste that pussy."

You let go of his length and pat his side. "Switch," you instruct, trying to wiggle out from under him. Eddie does as you say, laying back on his bed and watching you. You tug his jeans and boxers down off of his legs while Eddie tugs his shirt off. You hum, crawling over him to touch the tattoos on his chest. You're straddling him, leaning down to kiss the tattoos exposed to you.

"God, what a view." he groans, watching you on top of him.

"Just wait," you laugh, sitting back up. Your shirt goes next, followed by your bra and you swear Eddie's eyes might fall out of his head from how widely they're open and staring at your bare chest. You work your jeans off next, Eddie helping you tug them off but you swat at his hand when they go for your panties. "Watch it or I'll tie you up," you joke, but Eddie's eyes slide to the other side of the room. You follow his gaze and laugh seeing a set of handcuffs. "Next time," you promise.

"Thank fuck cause I would lose my mind if I can't touch you right now," Eddie chuckles, watching you slide down his body. He groans at each soft kiss you place on his chest an stomach. "Baby, please," he begs, even though he doesn't need to. You trace your tongue over the thick vein running along the underside of his cock, watching him intently as you get to work. Your tongue swipes up the bead of precum forming at his tip, humming at the taste of him before wrapping your lips around his head and gently sucking. Curses leave Eddie's lips as he watches you, reaching a hand down to tangle in your hair. You whimper around his tip, sliding down to take more of him into your throat and start bobbing your head.

"I-I'm not gonna last, babe," he warns, gently tugging on your hair. That admission just makes you up your efforts, bobbing your head faster as you take more and more of him into your throat. Your name falls from his lips as your work him down, going unto your nose is tickled by the patch of hair you admired earlier. At the same time, you moved your hand to stroke and play with the weight under his length, feeling him jump at the touch to his balls. You giggle, making yourself gag on him as you pull back up to catch your breath. "You okay?" Eddie finds it in him to ask after seeing you gag.

"I'm fine, baby." you reassure him, kissing his tip. You shift to sit up more, letting him see your bare breasts again as you jerk him off.

"Fuck, I died. I'm fucking dead and in Heaven. No one take me back," Eddie moans, eyeing your tits as your hand works him.

You giggle, shaking your head at him. "Enjoying the view?"

"So fucking much. Please remind me to fuck your tits one day,"

"Happy to." you hum, leaning down to dribble spit over his length. You get back to work, shifting down again and swiping your tongue over his balls before taking him back into your mouth. You start slow again before building up speed as your suck him off. Before you know it, Eddie is tugging on your hair, hips canting upward as he moans your name. You pull back a bit just in time for his seed to spill over your tongue instead of choking on it. You moan at the taste of him, jerking him off to milk him for all he's worth. You collect it all, lifting your head and opening your mouth to show him what all you have.

"Swallow it." Eddie growled, watching you shut your mouth an swallow it down. You open your mouth again, sticking out your tongue to show that you took it all. You let go of him, crawling up his body.

"You're hot when you're demanding. I won-eep!" you barely get to finish your sentence before Eddie is flipping you over onto your back. A searing kiss is pressed to your lips before he's disappearing down your body now. "Eddie," you groan as he spreads your legs.

Eddie presses a kiss over your hole through your panties, groaning at the scent of you. There's a wet patch there already, unable not to get wet hearing her whimper and moan for you. He reaches up, tugging your panties down and getting them off your legs. He tosses them behind him uncaringly but you laugh as it gets caught on his deodorant on his dresser.

He wastes little time, licking a stripe up from your entrance to your clit. Your breath catches in your throat at the sudden feeling and then he doesn't stop. Eddie laps at your cunt desperately, moaning into you as he does so. He moves your legs onto his shoulders, holding onto your thighs as he eats you out like he was starving. He had wondered for so long what you tasted like. Spent many nights thinking about it as he fisted his cock to the thought of you like this. Eddie's tongue swirled over his clit, losing the sounds it pulled out of you as he did so. He wrapped his lips around the sensitve bud, sucking gently. He coats his finger in your juices before gently prodding at your entrance. He slowly pushes his finger in, moaning against you as your walls suck him in desperately.

"F-Fuck, Eddie." you moan, reaching for his hair. You just had him in your mouth, so you know his size, but his finger swill burned as it stretched your neglected walls. His fingers were thicker than yours and it had been a long, long time. It made a feeling stir in your belly as you wondered just how much his cock would stretch you. Would he even fit? You bet he could make it fit. As he curled his finger, you shot up and gasped, crying out his name as he found that spongy spot inside you. Eddie chuckled against you, kissing your clit.

"Found it," he grinned, adding a second finger into you. He moved his free hand up, pressing down on your stomach to make you lay back down. You obliged, watching him as he fucked you with his fingers and lapped at your clit with the tip of his tongue. "Look at you, taking my fingers so good. You gonna cum for me, bunny?" he cooed before swirling his tongue over his clit. "Can't believe you're letting me do this, fuck, I could live here forever if you let me. Will you let me, baby? Please?" Eddie babbled into your cunt as he fingers you faster.

You felt the coil tighten in your belly, knowing you'd be crashing over it soon. You watched Eddie, whining at the sight of him grinding into the bed. Was he hard again already? Just from eating you out. "Y-You can live there, Eddie, please. Make me cum!" you whine, tugging on his hair. Seconds later as Eddie suckled on your clit again, your orgasm washed over you. His name moaned out loudly in the trailer and you prayed that his neighbors were dead asleep by now. Eddie fingered you through your orgasm, moaning against your clit. He pulled his fingers free and you whimpered at the loss of them, gasping when that stretch was replaced with his tongue as he devoured all that you gave him. He groaned into you, detaching his mouth with a line of flui going from your to his lips. Spit or your essence, you weren't really sure at this point. Eddie licked his lips though and crawled up, cock at attention again. It made you wet seeing it. How much he wanted you. Panting, you reached for him. "Sweetheart," he cooed, trying to grab your hand.

"No, can't believe you got hard for me again." you murmur, tracing your fingers down his length.

"What can I say? I've waited a long time to have you spread out here..." he admitted.

You reached down between your legs, collecting what you could of your wetness that came roaring back. You reached out, stroking Eddie. "C'mon, baby," you cooed as he bent down to kiss you. You stroked him slowly, lazily at first. Eddie groaned, gently thrusting into your fist.

"Fuck, I can't believe you." Eddie kisses you again, one hand raising to wrap his hand around your throat. You whine at the feeling, stroking him faster as his fingers squeeze the sides of your throat. "That's it-fuuuck. Got yourself all over me and I haven't even fucked you yet. Bein so good to me, wanting me to cum again." Eddie babbled, pressing kisses to your cheeks and nose as you worked his length.

"I want it. Want you to paint me, Teddy," your whine, choking on your gasp as he squeezes again.

"Open your mouth." he growls and you do as he says. He leans over you, spitting into your mouth. "Swallow that too." He demands and you do as he says once his hold loosens a little on your throat. "That's my girl, fuck. Bunny, baby, please," He gasps as you speed up your hand. It doesn't take long before Eddie is rocking into your hand, moaning your name as he spurts white ropes all over your stomach, even getting it on your chest. He lets go of your throat, pressing kisses there. You let go of his softening length, whimpering at his kisses.

Eddie leans up, watching you as a grin spreads over his lips. "What?" you ask, reaching down to swipe up some of his cum from your breast and bring it to your mouth.

"God, you're so fucking hot." he groans, giving you a kiss.

You hum, feeling sleep tug at you. He definitely wore you out and it made you wonder how worn out you'd be if he did fuck you. Eddie kisses your face. "M tired," you mumble to him and he chuckles.

"Hold on, not yet. I'm sorry, babe." Eddie kisses your forehead and climbs off his bed. He disappears for a bit, returning with a wet rag and a glass of water. "C'mon,"

You huff and sit up a bit, taking the rag from him and cleaning his mess off of you. Eddie pulls on a fresh pair of boxers before rooting around for a t-shirt. He walks back over, handing you a t-shirt before taking the rag to toss into his hamper. You unfold the shirt, pulling it over your head and down your body. You rub your eyes, frowning at the mascara that comes off. You know you should go pee and try to wash off the makeup. You move to stand but Eddie stops you. He points to the glass of water. You take it, taking a few gulps before setting it aside. Once he's satisfied, you go to the bathroom and pee before trying to wash your makeup off with soap and water. A bit of black is still smudged aroun your eyes but it's better than nothing.

When you get back to his room, Eddie is laid in bed waiting for you. His TV is on, playing some late night show as he waits for you. You admire the view before finally walking over and crawling into bed. Eddie grins, pulling you close and holding you. "Hi," he murmurs.

"Hi," you mumble back, pressing a kiss to his chest.

"Can't believe this is happening right now," he whispers and you can't help but laugh.

"I can hear you." you tell him, rubbing his belly.

"Oops, was just thanking God real quick, sorry." Eddie laughed, kissing your head.

"You're a dork," you mumble.

"I am."

"But you're my dork now. If you wanna be, I mean," you mumble shyly.

You feel the bed jostle. So you open your eyes to see Eddie fist pumping in victory. You laugh, Eddie joining you as he realizes he's caught. "Yeah, I do wanna be." he answers, tilting your head up to steal a kiss. "Get some rest, bunny."

"You too, Teddy," you mumble against his lips before wiggling to settle down and sleep, dozing off to the soft sounds of the TV and Eddie's quick beating heart, the metalhead following soon after.

[bts-trans]

250215 Weverse Translation

Jungkook’s Post ❇️ with J-Hope's Comment 💬

아미 건강하지요? 요즘 날씨가 풀린 것 같다가도 또 추워지고 꼭 제 마음을 보는듯한 느낌입니다 오늘 날씨는 유독 을씨년스럽네요 아직 멀었다만 이쯤 되니 스스로에게 지분대는 날들이 많아지는 것 같기도 하네요 여러모로 생각이 많은 밤입니다 가끔 상상으로 아미들과 제 모습을 ��� 사진에 담곤 합니다 순간 입가에 번지는 미소에 기분이 참 좋습니다 반면 이제는 상상뿐일까 하는 회의감이 들 때도 있습니다 물론 그 회의감조차 의심하고 상상보다 더 아름다운 추억을 쌓을 겁니다 물론 그만큼 제가 노력해야겠죠ㅎ 아미들을 생각하는 마음과 여태껏 제 이야기를 쓴 연필의 주인은 여러분인 걸 결코 잊지 않고 있습니다 그렇기에 제가 어떻게 해야 되는지 잘 알고 있다는 말이죠 알면서도 뭔가 조급하고 기대되고 조금은 불안한가 봅니다 그래도 몇 자 적으니 상념에 잠겨있진 않아도 될 것 같아요 그냥… 끔찍이 여러분들 생각한다 뭐 그거만 좀 알아달라는 거예요 딴 건 바라는 거 없습니다 ㅎ 고맙습니다 글 봐줘서 오늘도 보고 싶습니다 여전히 기다립니다 건강 잘 챙기세요 여러분 사랑합니다

JH: 으른이 됐구나 쨔이케이.. (https://weverse.io/bts/artist/3-192517255)

ARMY, you're in good health, right? The weather these days feels like is gotten better but then it gets colder, and it really feels like its following my own emotions The weather today is particularly gloomy It's still a while away but I think, now that I'm at this point, I'm having a lot of days where I feel perturbed It is an evening full of thoughts for me, in many ways I sometimes picture myself with you guys in one frame A smile spreads across my face in that moment, and I feel quite happy I sometimes find myself suspicious, wondering whether I'm just imagining that only half a year remains now Of course, I then doubt that suspicion itself, and I know that we're going to make memories even better than my imagination. Of course, I have to work hard and make sure that happens heh I never forget my feelings towards you, and I never forget that you are the the ones holding the pencil that has been writing my story And so, in other words, I know very well what I'm supposed to do. And yet I feel kind of impatient and eager and even a little bit anxious, I think Still, now that I've put some words to paper, I don't think I have to get lost in my ruminations I just…I am so painfully always thinking about you, okay, that's all, I just wanted you to know that, that's all I'm asking for heh

Thank you for reading this

I miss you today too

I'm waiting, as always

Please take care of your health, everyone

I love you

JH: All grown up, JayKay��

Trans cr; Aditi @ bts-trans © TAKE OUT WITH FULL CREDITS

[houseofanticipation]

I put you in the basement at first. Obviously. I can't just give you free rein of the house, not when you still believe there's a life for you outside it. No, you stay in the basement, and because I don't have you trained yet, you stay chained to the wall. This is probably about as frustrating for me as it is for you. You don't like being chained to a wall? Imagine how tiresome it is for me that I have to come all the way downstairs every time I want to rape you.

When some of the fight has gone out of you (it may be as short as a week or as long as several months, depending on how willful you are), I let you roam the basement freely. There's not a lot to do down there, but at least you can pace if you want, and I'm sure it's a relief to have that cuff off your ankle. At this point you're probably still planning to escape eventually, but you've realized you need to be smart about it. You need to wait and bide your time. Be a good girl for me and let me get complacent, and eventually I'll slip up.

Of course, what you're telling yourself each day you wait is that some amount of rape is acceptable. When you hear me coming and get on the bed preemptively, so I don't have to beat you down. When you spread your legs for me instead of trying to resist. When you touch yourself beforehand, just to make yourself wet enough that it's a little less painful when I force myself into you without lube. With each little act of acquiescence, you're telling yourself, I choose this. I have weighed the options, and this rape is what's best for me at this moment. I think you'll be surprised by how much that sentiment can build up.

One day, a few months after I unchain you, I leave the door open. Not by a lot, not enough to be obvious, but you notice. It seems like an accident, like I got careless and forgot to make sure it latched on my way out. You wait until you think I'm asleep and then you make a break for it. I let you get as far as the driveway before I stop you. And when I use you that night, believe me, it is brutal.

In the coming weeks I "forget" the door more and more often. Maybe the second time it happens you really believe you've just gotten lucky again. But by the third time you see the game: I don't bother with the door because I'm not worried about you escaping. I'm stronger and faster and smarter than you, and I know when you're going to try to escape before you do.

My favorite little trick comes a few weeks later. At that point I've stopped bothering with the door entirely, and you no longer try to escape every night. You're biding your time again, waiting for the crack in cage, only this time the cage is bigger, and it's harder to tell where the walls are. But on this night you do try to escape (you think you've figured out my sleep schedule), and you make it all the way down to the road. You flag down a cop car as it drives by, and explain breathlessly to a horrified officer that you've been held captive, raped, beaten, that the man who did this to you lives right up there on the hill, that any second I'm going to wake up and notice you missing, and you need to go now. The officer calls for backup, puts you in the back seat of his car, and proceeds to drive you right back up to my house, where I'm waiting for you.

As a bonus for helping me out, I let him rape you right there in the backseat of his car.

It doesn't take many games like that before you stop trusting anyone at all. You walk half a mile down the road to my neighbor's house, he gives me a call the second he sees you coming up the driveway. A long-haul trucker picks you up in passing, and he takes you to a local dive bar where he and his buddies can have their way with you while you wait for me to come pick you up. All it takes is a few well-placed friends to make you believe I somehow know everyone in the world, and they're all going to give you up the moment you ask for help.

So you stop asking for help.

You're tired of the punishment. You're tired of the brutality. Better some rape than cruel, brutal rape. Isn't it? You stop trying to escape. You stop resisting. You come when I call, you suck when I tell you to suck, you swallow when I tell you to swallow. And in return I keep you comfortable, well fed, taken care of. Not such a bad trade off, really.

I know I've won when I can go on vacation. I'll just leave one day for a long weekend. I don't bother telling you where I'm going, or how long I'll be gone. You wander the house, maybe even go out in the yard, but you don't try to run. There's a little voice in the back of your head telling you this is all a trick, I want you to run, I'm out there waiting for you to break the rules so I can hurt you worse than I've ever hurt you before.

You decide not to risk it. Better to stay here, where it's safe.

[averagepossumenjoyer]

"Tag nine people you want to get to know better" thing. (I'm not against such things, on the contrary, I would like more of them, I don't know, for some reason I've been very sociable lately.)

Tagged by: @macaron-jester

Favorite Color: Purple. It's always been purple. Idk why.

Currently Reading: "Five books of the lives, heroic deeds and sayings of Gargantua and his son Pantagruel". We are currently studying medieval literature in lectures, and I decided to start with this one from the whole list. But I like it and I didn't regret this decision at all. I think I'm going to be obsessed with medieval literature in the near future anyway, I think I'm going to be too interested in this topic the more I start studying it.

Last Song: Hush -- Deep Purple. It's been about an hour since I listened that song on my playlist, lol.

Last Movie: I watched a lot of movies during the holidays, but I remember that the last ones were "The Mask" and "Shrek the Third".

Last Series: Honestly, I'm not a fan of series just because I'm too lazy to watch them, although sometimes I really want to. But at the same time, I've often felt gusts of nostalgia lately and I've been watching some animated series because of the memories and the fact that they sometimes inspire me. "Adventure Time" was one of them.

Sweet, Savoury, Spicy: Sweet things can't be without savoury things, just as savoury things can't be without sweet things. They are complete opposites, but at the same time they exist in harmony. I can't choose one thing, I need this damn balance every day, sorry.

Craving: I usually don't eat for half a day, so when I get home, I'm ready to eat anything. But sometimes I think about cinnamon bun, garlic bread, or ciabatta. Or schnitzel with pickled cucumbers. Or about cranberries in sugar. I'm not picky about food.

Tea/Coffee: Once upon a time, I couldn't live without tea. Now I can't live without coffee.

Currently working on: That's where the fun begins. A comic that I plan to release either on October 31st or November 24th (I even thought about rescheduling it to December.). It's actually a long story, because I want to do it probably from 2021 or 2022, (I even have some kind of storyboard of some moments from then and one concept art or something like that. Actually, that's not all, there are more such things, it's just what I have access to now) but then I lacked the skills, 2023 was a big shock and disappointment for me, which caused me to be in a kind of stagnation for a long time, and in 2024 I may have recovered from that year, but I was just exhausted. I think this year I will finally create what I wanted and I will have to start in the near future to make it.

I'm currently making concepts for the main characters, and so far 3/8 of the main and minor ones are coming out. There are a lot more secondary characters as well as the main ones, but I can't show some of them in the way I would like. I can't post the finished part now because I want to show them all together.

Sometimes I open FL Studio, but for this I definitely need to catch the moment when some annoying melody starts playing in my head. A couple of days ago, I didn't have time to save that kind of the melody. But maybe I'll recreate it someday if I remember. I used to have a guitar and I could play the first half of "Killer Queen" before the chorus according to some tutorial. Basically, I'm just drawing, rather than doing music thing.

Beware of this, y'all, more than half of my subscribers! But I'm not insisting, I'm just suggesting.

@flowuraa @c00kietin @artsandstoriesandstuff @bvannn @owlthatnestslow @hyperiinked @lavendercheesecake @ridiculouslyaverageguy @tobyfoxfacts

rules: tag nine people you want to get to know better

Tagged by @indrid-hot - thanks a bunch!

Favorite Color: A nice, warm, sunny orange - but also honestly most other colors of the rainbow and then some.

Currently Reading: The Tevinter Nights Dragon Age short story collection.

Last Song: L'appuntamento - Ornella Vanoni

Last Movie: Ah, gosh. HM. I haven't watched anything that's not a TV show in a while. I semi-voluntarily caught the last fifteen minutes of Scrooged over the winter holidays I guess?

Last Series: Last series I watched any part of is, as always, "Emergency!" because I will never not be stuck in 70's paramedic hell. If we're talking new-to-me shows, a friend's making me watch Grey's Anatomy (early seasons) once a week, probably because observing my growing despair about the characters' poor life choices is fun. I don't even normally watch medical shows, and yet here we are lol

Sweet, Savoury, Spicy: Savory if I had to pick

Craving: Some good spaghetti with olive oil and obscene amounts of lightly toasted garlic.

Tea/Coffee: Yes please, lol

Currently working on: OH BOY WHAT A QUESTION.

Spinning: Gotland on my spindles (4-ply, one single per spindle, for funsies - except I accidentally mixed up which bits of fiber go with which single on which spindle, so that'll be fun to sort out...), 7oz/200g of red Merino on the wheel (for a crochet hat, followed by 9.5 oz of red and black Merino for a woven scarf). But also 24.5oz/700g of grey Merino. And cotton on the supported spindle. And I've got some laceweight viscose on the mini turkish spindle that I should really work on...

Crocheting: Half a dozen things, including a lacy collar that needs buttons and blocking, a gigantic star-shaped wrap-around shawl, an incredibly boring granny square top for my little sister, and too many others to count.

Art: The Emergency! tarot as the eternal never-ending WIP; I also have some Dragon Age Veilguard related plans revolving around the Grand Necropolis and irl Catacomb Saints and I'd love to get some DA-style tarot cards done for all my player characters.

Writing: I still have a couple unfinished fanfics that need another chapter, as well as two deeply self-indulgent OC/Emergency! crossovers that friends are making me write, and I also have some Dragon Age stuff in the works - though if anyone will ever see that is another question entirely.

Music: Practicing various stuff for LARP; also slowly chipping away at Hozier's Work Song because my partner asked nicely.

With no pressure, I will tag: @geminyde, @caseyscraftycorner, @swords-n-spindles, @alpacazappa, @rosesonneptune, @rose-of-pollux, @zooarchaeologyatdinner, @kalikatze aaaaand I can't decide on a 9th person to tag so whoever wants to do this: You're It!

[captain-huggy-bear]

The New Guy

Pairing: Kiefer Sherwood x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Sexual innuendo

Summary: You have an interesting first interaction with the new Canuck, Kiefer Sherwood.

Notes: Request from @toasttt11: I went with a close friend of Quinn rather than sister because that way more people can relate but I hope this is the kinda vibe you were after for this :)

A short little one, but hopefully funny/silly

Totally happy to take requests/ideas/prompts at the moment in my ask box :)

Writing Masterlist

You've seen more trades than you can possibly comprehend in your time as Quinn's best friend. Witnessed the way everyone grew solemn as a friend and teammate had to leave suddenly to somewhere else, sometimes right before a game, sometimes in the off season. Saw how difficult it was when they were opponents, rivals rather than teammates for the first time in years. But, also the excitement when someone new came in and no one was more excited for this particular acquisition than Quinn.

Your best friend had pushed so hard, so much for the team to get Kiefer Sherwood and it meant that the day of his official signing, official joining, Quinn was abuzz, or at least as abuzz as Quinn can get, which meant slightly less haunted than usual. Some of the usual stress of being captain having been lifted from his shoulders with the prospect of a new teammate to help them win the Stanley Cup.

"He's going to be so good for the team, Y/N. We need a solid enforcer, someone to make big hits." He'd been ranting on and rambling all day about how good Sherwood would be for the team and it was starting to dull the shine, just a little. You couldn't help but roll your eyes as the two of you walked through the corridors of the arena.

"You've only said about a thousand times." You're happy for Quinn and the team, of course you are. The excitement palpable as you stop outside the locker room. You can't even deny that you are a little excited yourself to meet the 6ft tall forward, a new teammate for Quinn usually meant a new friend for you...it helped that he was handsome and that meant another face to ogle at when you were in the stands watching the games. You liked having a little bit of eye candy in your day, not that you'd tell Quinn that. He'd probably complain that you were a HR incident waiting to happen.

"Hey! I mean it. This is our year!" Quinn smiles at you in such a genuinely hopeful way that you really hope he's right. Being captain has meant he takes every error, every loss onto his own shoulders. You really hope Sherwood and the team prove Quinn right, for Quinn's sake more than anything else.

"He better be nice, that's all I'm saying, if he treats me like a coffee girl I'm going to enforce him." You cross your arms over your chest as if you might fight someone, quite hilarious when you consider the sorts of men you're surrounded by on the daily. Still, you're determined not to be undermined or treated like just a pretty face, casual workplace sexism was not something you were going to allow. You hoped this new guy wasn't one of those hockey players. You'd dealt with your fair share in your life and couldn't stand them.

"What does that even mean?" Quinn huffs out a laugh at you, shaking his head at you because he loves you, but fuck, you can be so weird sometimes. You remind him a little of Luke. A little weird, a little strange but in the best sort of way. Endearingly bizarre.

"It means he'll get shoved into the boards." He might be 6ft and 200lbs but you're pretty sure that with the element of surprise you could get Kiefer Sherwood into the boards if he annoyed you enough. Maybe even onto his back on the ice with a well aimed stick to the ankles.

"Y/N." Quinn seems to disagree, it's quite insulting actually, the way he looks at you like you're mad. Like your smaller stature makes it impossible.

"You don't think I can do it? I've shoved Luke into the lake before."

"Lukey is a bean pole and loves you, so he let you." You're actually quite hurt that Quinn is convinced the Luke let you shove him into the lake when you know that you did so on your own merit and skill.

"You think I can't shove Kiefer Sherwood into some boards? You think I'm weak!"

"Y/N." Quinn's gaze shifts behind you, just over your shoulder but you don't take much notice of it. He's probably looking at one of the arena workers.

"This...you're supposed to be my best friend. I could take him! I could definitely take Kiefer Sherwood!" You're actually a little hurt that Quinn doesn't seem to think you're capable of taking Kiefer Sherwood in a fight. Even if he's probably right. Sherwood could probably toss you like you're a doll...an appealing thought depending on the circumstances behind it.

"Y/N!" It's the urgency behind Quinn yelling your name and the way his stare is directed above your head, mixed with the hint of a laugh that tells you you're about to be terribly embarrassed.

There's a beat of silence, your shoulders tensing, mouth pursing in realisation.

"...He's right behind me, isn't he?" Quinn nods in confirmation, holding back a laugh as you briefly close your eyes, trying to swallow the embarrassment that you can feel rising in you like a wave. Not the best first impression you've ever made.

You turn to look behind you once you've composed yourself. Kiefer Sherwood is there, leaning against the wall with one shoulder, arms crossed and smirking at you. He looks frustratingly handsome, perfectly rugged and dishevelled from the dimples around his smirk to the dark curls that seemed to fall perfectly around his face. He looks...big too. The only accurate way to describe him, broad shouldered, solid, like he's immovable and perhaps you'd overestimated your ability to fight the man. Perhaps Quinn was right. But, you're certain you could take him...just maybe not in a fight.

"You can shove me into the boards any time you want, princess." The way he looks at you, all dark half lidded eyes and long lashes, makes warmth flood through your entire body, but mostly ending in your face. You're certain your cheeks are on fire with how warm they are.

"Kief, don't flirt with my best friend." You want to tell Quinn off because Kiefer Sherwood can certainly flirt with you if he wants, especially if he looks at you like that. You did not need the overprotective best friend act right now.

"But, she's cute." His eyes don't leave you even as he responds to Quinn, like he's still talking to you.

"Kief."

"Alright, alright..." He pushes off of the wall, practically sauntering over to you, stopping a few feet short, respectable enough to give you space, but there's nothing respectable about the smirk he's still sporting. "Still think you could take me?"

"Oh, definitely." There's absolutely no mistaking the way you lower your voice, the coy tone to it, the fact that you most certainly don't mean in a fight. It has Kiefer throwing his head back with a loud, rumbling laugh while Quinn all but hisses at you like a scolding parent.

"Y/N!"

Yeah, you think you might like the new guy...maybe more than you should.

[nuttyhatter]

For the past few days I've been reading Transformers' fanfiction. Am I in the fandom? No. Was I reading about Optimus and Megatron? Yes. Should I be Ashamed? Yeah, probably, but that's not the point.

The point here is that I learned that in the past, Optimus was Orion Pax and Megatron was D-16. And then I remembered an episode of an animated serie I used to watch in Cartoon Network where Optimus lost his memory and he seemed to get along with Megatron and belive what he said. Then I think I stopped watching, either because they always repeated the same episodios or because I got bored, I don't know.

I'm also confused about Megatron's past. D-16 was a miner. But I also read about him as a gladiator and the name Megatronus instead of Megatron is also thrown around.

Orion Pax was an archivist I believe, which I understand as a sort of librarian.

Where am I going to with all of this?

You'll see, I want to know if there is a fic where, when Optimus loses his memory and becomes Orion Pax, he is a complete and absolute menace. He is still an archivist, sure, but he has a Past, he has Lore. He was not the cool and collected hero and soldier he is today and he was not some quite and shy young mech. No, he was chaotic. Trouble followed him and when it didn't, he went looking for it.

I can't decide if I want the past friendship with Megatron to be a part of whatever this is or not.

But lets say it isn't, let's say that Megatron is just as confused as everyone else.

And what about Autobots and Decepticons? Easy, Orion would have no idea what those are. And he wouldn't care. He would only care about how cool flying seemed and then be absolutly exited about being able to do it himself (assuming he can, I don't even know where in the saga I am putting this). He'd want to race the Autobots in the ground and the Decepticons in the sky.

BUT he would not trust any of them. Why? Because they all kept calling him Optimus Prime, insisting that's who he was. Prime! As if he'd ever become part of that system!

In the meantime, he is balancing the despair of the news about the destruction of his home world and everyone he knew with the excitement of a new world plus the loneliness and confusion that came with the later.

For Megatron, you'd think things were ideal since his greatest obstacle was out of the way, right?

Wrong!

There was one thing Megatron could have never imagined, never expected or even suspected, and that's just how much the other Decepticons liked Orion Pax.

Orion was funny, he liked to spar and he fought dirty. He made jokes and teased them and he was not afraid of any of them. He was not stupid and understood that all of the Decepticons had a past, they all had done horrible things, but for some reason that wasn't a deterrent. Sure, the mech didn't trust them (and those trust issues should be adressed, but the Decepticons were no better so...), but Orion was always up for a good sparring session or just fooling around. The mech was also odly well-read in the weirdest of topics from history to medicine, mythology and weird facts about games from Kaon (why? and how?).

And Orion was that odd kind of friend that didn't tell you shit about himself, but for some reason you wanted to tell him everything about you.

And what about the Autobots?

Well, they obviously missed their leader, but the ones that really had a problem were the younger ones because why was Opt-Orion so friendly with the Decepticons but didn't even speak with them?

Orion was avoiding them and he would keep that up until those Autobots stopped calling him Optimus.

Orion would go here and there and some times help the Autobots and others the Decepticons if any of them were in actual troubles because he was still a good person who cared about others while trying not to do so.

Just... Orion Pax accidentally uniting the remaining Cybertronians by being his lovable, reckles, and complicated self.

And there is megop, apparently...

[akawifeyy]

A DATE AT SEVEN, I DREAMED OF HEAVEN | fic (LN4)

description: after dozens of failed attempts, you finally cave in to your best friend's pleads to let her set you up with somebody.

tropes: blind date, love at first sight, cousin's best friend!fem!reader

face claim: none

trigger warnings: suggestive content, swearing

| note: this is an au i've had in my mind for agessss omg

You were so fed up with the toxic culture of online dating apps that you finally gave in to your best friend Isolde's request, letting her set you up with someone. A blind date was not something you would normally do – it was out of your comfort zone and definitely risky. Perhaps it would be worth it, though. You trusted Isolde, that she wouldn't lead you astray. But even the people with the best intentions could be proven wrong.

According to her, he was cute and funny. A good conversationalist, loyal. "A lot to handle at once, but he's like a puppy. He'll grow on you." The words were somewhat comforting, yet the jury was still out on whether it was a good match. You had been thinking about it all week, staring into space and dreaming about meeting him, the perfect man. 

Today was the day. For lack of better words, it was showtime. The hour was nigh, proving that your delusions would be upheld or shattered. You stood outside the cafe, tapping your foot impatiently as you scrolled through your Instagram feed. You had tried to find your blind date, but he wasn't following Isolde.

It could have been anyone. The guy in the beige trench coat walking his dog, or the man with dyed blue hair and two piercings standing at the crosswalk.

But no, it wasn't either of them.

A tanned, curly-headed man sauntered up to you, his hazel eyes scanning you like he was making sure you were the right person. "Hey, you're Y/N, right?" he asked.

"Yeah, are you my date?" You grinned, blushing as you took in his appearance. Damn, your friend had done a good job. He was exactly your type.

The man outstretched a hand. "I'm Lando. Nice to meet you."

You took the handshake, heat flooding you at the contact.

After pulling apart, Lando opened the door to the cafe, ushering you in first and trailing behind you.

The cafe itself was cozy, with warm lantern lights hanging from the ceiling, and various flora tangling itself throughout the stucco brick walls. The hostess brought you to a comfortable booth in a quiet part of the restaurant, and Lando let you sit down first before striking up a conversation.

"So..." he started, a smile growing on his lips. "You're friends with Isolde, hm?"

You nodded. "Yeah, we've been friends since year one of uni. How do you know her?"

"We're cousins," he confided. "Sadly."

You cocked your head to the side, trying to determine if he was joking or not. "Why is that a sad thing?"

"Everyone thinks we're siblings, and then when we tell them we're not, they assume our parents cheated." He hummed under his breath. Now that you were thinking about it, Isolde and Lando did look an awful lot like one another. They had the same unruly brown hair, tanned skin, hazel eyes. No wonder people were confused. "That's not really a conversation for the first date, is it, though? I'd like to know more about you."

You shrugged one shoulder. "Has Isolde not told you anything about me? I'm surprised."

Lando tapped his fingers against the table, thinking. "I mean, she told me that you went on dates with lots of guys that didn't work out. And not to fuck this up."

You laughed. "Sounds like Isolde."

"Well, want to enlighten me, Y/N?" Lando asked eagerly.

You looked down at your nails, which were painted a soft blue color. Isolde was training to be an esthetician, so she practiced on you frequently, something you weren't complaining about. "I mean, I love to read and write."

"What kind? Poetry? Epics?" he pushed, digging for more information. "I'm sure you're cool, now prove it to me."

You rolled your eyes jokingly. "I write poetry sometimes, but mostly just short stories. Nothing publishable, they're not that good." You ignored Lando's exasperated huff, and continued. "As for reading, I like romcoms and thrillers. I know, they're both opposites, but they're my favorites. Do you like to read?"

Lando shook his head. "Nope, I'm not a reader. But I don't mind you talking about the books that you're reading. Girls talking about their interests are single-handedly the most attractive thing I've ever witnessed."

"And how many girls do you usually have to talk to about such matters?" you inquired.

"I'm not a player, if that's what you're getting at," Lando said, his eyes wide. "I've had a few girlfriends, but none of them worked out. I'm not a cheater. If I'm talking to one girl, that's it. No one else matters."

You pursed your lips. "That's nice."

"It's basic decency," he corrected you sternly. "As for my hobbies, I like to game and drive cars."

"Like... sports cars?" you waited for clarification, confused.

Lando blinked, taken aback. "Y/N...Isolde didn't tell you?"

Panic flooded you, as you thought that you'd missed some important clue as to who he was. You were utterly oblivious. "No?"

"I'm a Formula One driver. For McLaren."

Oh. "Really?" you said quizzically. "She didn't tell me. She was probably respecting your privacy, and left that detail up to you."

Lando inclined his head. "That's nice of her, but I feel like a muppet. Do you watch F1?"

"Not really, I've watched a few Grand Prix, but I don't know much." You swallowed roughly. "Is that a dealbreaker?"

Lando frowned. "No. It's all the more reason to buy you paddock passes and show you what you're missing out on."

The waitress came by, and you ordered a few drinks and a small meal. You kept talking, slowly becoming more relaxed with one another. Lando informed you about his golf obsession, and you teased him, calling him an old man. In retaliation, he stole the cherry from your drink like a quick, cunning monkey, and you laughed so hard you couldn't breathe.

Isolde was right: Lando was amazing.

When you finished drinking and eating, Lando immediately offered to pay, but you pushed back, protesting loudly. "Let me split the bill, please."

"I have more than enough money for the both of us. It's the respectful thing to do," he reminded you.

You scowled at him, but gave up the fight you knew you were losing. "Fine."

You gathered your belongings, entering Lando's number into your phone, and bid him goodnight. Lando had given you a quick kiss on the cheek, thanking you for the date, and your body had bloomed with warmth at the sensation. "See you soon?"

"Yep," you beamed.

You knew this was just the first of many dates, and the start of a romance for the ages.

─── ୨୧ ─── THE END ─── ୨୧ ───

[stilljuststardust]

I don't know. What should I do? 😭 If you were in my place what would u do?..

I'm literally so lost. Right now. Like I feel like I'm in a slump, rut, a cycle of "read Tumblr posts, try, fall, repeat" how do I break free from this???? I genuinely just want to shift. Or live my dream life.

God I'm so done. Ever since I found out abt void (or got into reality shifting) I've put hold on life ever since, it'll be almost an year, I really don't want to keep living like this, it's like god. I can't. I just want to leave this reality. I'm so done. I want to enter void state. I just. God. Oh my god. I can't. I've idolized these things so much I know but these are my only saviors. I do believe all of this is real, but I don't trust my own ability, I know, I've been trying for so long, am I even trying at this point? I know i should give up, but how? I just can't keep living like this, it's hell...

Hello love, turn off your phone.

1. Save what you need to

Find a handful of concise posts that center you and remind you who you are and what you are capable of/remind you that manifestation isn't actually hard

Screenshot them, save them, print them out, whatever you need to but save them in a way that doesn't require you to reopen Tumblr. Maybe make a google doc with them/any links to videos or subliminals that you ground yourself with

2. Address your phone addiction

I fell down a rabbit hole on dopamine addiction a couple months back and I've learned a bit about it. If you want to stop overconsumption you have to stop doomscrolling.

Don't put your phone by your bed. Do not let the first thing you do in the morning be checking your notifications and scrolling.

"think of it as a lemon that you're squeezing the juice out of right? ...at the very beginning you can squeeze very little and you can get a lot of juice out of. But at the very end you need something very very powerful to squeeze out the remaining juice. So the more dopaminergic the task the less dopamine you need to engage in the activity " - DR K

The problem is your phone releases INSANE amounts of dopamine. It's this flashing color crack box that immediately spends all of that dopamine and because you used it first thing you need extremely dopaminergic activities or you can't focus.

Other extremely dopaminergic things include: video games, pornography, seeing people you hate attempt to bleach their hair, gambling, etc.

If you're trying to kick your phone addiction there's a couple things to remember:

You are going to get through the first day and think "I'm doing so well what's a TikTok break going to hurt" DONT FALL FOR IT. Your brain is lying to you. If you were good at moderation you wouldn't be trying to kick the addiction in the first place

It's ok to be bored. You have to accept being bored. It's good for your brain. Be bored.

Do not quit because you tripped up. The best advice I've heard for addiction is not to treat it as "I have to have an unbroken streak" this leads people to go on benders because of small slip ups because they "ruined it anyway". Instead think in percentages. You made it through 6/7 days. That's still an improvement and yes the goal is 7/7 but you are getting there if you keep your discipline.

3. How your day should look

Wake up and take a couple minutes to affirm and saturate your mind. This is basically bragging to yourself about how much you have it and it's yours. Affirm things like "oh my god I just woke up in my DR" or "Oh my god I shifted"

Do the shit you need to do. Don't put it off. Why should your life here have to stop??

Whenever you think about the things you want remind yourself that you already have it and it's yours. Think about it as if you have it. Do saturation sessions throughout the day if you want to.

Stop searching for a new method, advice, whatever, think as if you have already manifested it instead of spiralling into "I don't have it. this next post will help me have it" Do. Not. Think. About. It. As. If. You. Don't. Have. It.

Actually stick to it. Yes even if it takes longer than you want.

Great video on saturation that you should watch: click here

What you're doing wrong

What do you mean you've put your life on hold? Please do not do that. There is no reason to. If you ignore the obvious downsides to neglecting yourself and your life, you should know that isn't helping your manifestation at all either.

Right now you're suspended in a waiting state. You're entire life revolves around "I have to figure out how to do this", "I haven't done this yet so I can't focus on anything else"

What is that telling your subconscious? That it's not here and that nothing can change.

The point of LOA is to think as if it's already here. If you put everything on hold until you have it the only state you are thinking from is "it's not here". If you were thinking from the state of having it you wouldn't be doing any of that. "I can't do ____ until this manifests" you just affirmed that it hasn't manifested/you have not shifted. Not only are you frozen in the physical world but the internal one.

"I know I should give up but how" who told you to give up? I don't think you should do that. Why would you give up on something you have?

Both manifestation and shifting work the same way. You think as if you are there or that you have what you want and the physical world has to change to fit that. Has to.

These things are not your saviors. These things are not things. They are not outside of you. It is not a magical ability you need to tap into, it is something you are already doing. Your assumptions choose what your physical world looks like 24/7. It doesn't turn off that is just how you work. Your reality has ALWAYS shifted to match your mind. You aren't harnessing anything you are just realizing your own potential.

I know it sounds absurdly simple, that's because it is. You are creating your reality. Create. Sit down and think as if it's here. Bask in having it.

Do you know what the void state is? It's you. It's your consciousness. Are you consciousness ? Then you can enter. The reason you aren't experiencing it now is just because you are telling yourself that you are your body. You are not your body. You are the consciousness. Void state is just a return to self.

It is ok to focus on yourself and your life. You are going to be ok. You are going to shift. Please please take care of yourself

Links (please)

Watch this if your forgot who TF you are (fave YouTuber at the moment)

Your only limiting belief

Robotic affirmation timer

[thezombieprostitute]

The Prey

A/N: Follow up to The Hunt. Entirely written on my phone.

A/N2: Reader is big, tall and female.

Warnings: Implied smut, Implied violence, Self-deprecation, Stalking. Please let me know if I missed any.

🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒

It feels like you've been on edge the entire week. Like you're being stalked, but every time you look, there's no one there. Figuring you could use a break you decide to eat at your favorite place for dinner. You're sitting in a booth at the pub, reading a book and eating some dinner when a man you don't know sits across from you.

"Damn you're cute," he says.

"No I'm not. And I really don't appreciate lying."

He gives you a confused look, "what do you mean?"

"I am, objectively speaking, unattractive. The way you said I was cute indicates a feeling of attraction and, let's be honest, that's not possible."

"You don't even know me but you really think I'm that shallow?"

"Look, it's not your fault society dictates attractiveness. Maybe it's just not something you ever had to deal with because you are very much an ideal. You've got beautiful eyes, a physique that is tall, muscular and healthy. And it just makes me wonder what's wrong with you that you're not already taken and you're slumming it with someone like me."

"Slumming it?" he asks incredulously.

"Yes," you nod. "All my curves are disproportionate to each other, too much here, too little there. I've got chin hairs and regularly get acne. My eyes are, at best, normal and boring. And let's not even get started on my hair. It's also a fact that men do not care for women as tall or taller than them. I am, objectively, physically unattractive. So when you call me cute, I have to believe you're lying."

"You are very weird," he shakes his head.

"I am," you agree. "Then again, you're the one who interrupted my dinner."

"Just trying to give you a compliment," he groans as he gets up.

"And all you accomplished was interrupting my reading."

You pick your book back up and pretend to read. Your eyes follow him as he heads back to his buddies. Your suspicions are confirmed when you see him hand some cash over to one of his buddies.

It's not the first time bets have been placed at your expense and it won't be the last. It's always a game of getting the ugly girl's hopes up. String her along and then break her heart while leaving her with the tab.

Maybe you'd have been nicer about it if you hadn't been so on edge lately.

Across the bar you don't notice Kraven watching you. It took all of his strength to not step in and punch the bastard so hard he'd never breathe right again. And when you kept talking down about yourself he quietly growled with rage. When you're his mate, he'll make sure you never feel less than gorgeous.

And you will be his mate. He's been following you, trying to find flaws, reasons to walk away, but he can't. You've picked up on him following you, indicating an alertness beyond most humans. Despite obviously being upset, you still helped anyone and everyone at the library without them even guessing you weren't feeling well, indicating your suitability for raising offspring.

And when you tried to release some of that stress in the privacy of your apartment? He breathed in the scent the next day when he broke into your apartment. It was all over your panties that now reside near his bed. It isn't quite "bitch-in-heat" but it still gets him going.

But first, he's going to follow those assholes who messed with you and make sure they never do so again.

Soon he'll have everything needed for your new home. He's determined to show his quality as a mate, as a provider, by building you a dream den. It'll have everything you've ever wanted and needed. Perfect for raising your children.

The only thing you might not like is his rule about no outside contact. At least not until you're fully his. But he's sure it won't take long. You're incredibly smart, kind and you'll know it's meant to be.

🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒🌒

Tagging: @alicedopey ; @delicatebarness ; @hederasgarden @icefrozendeadlyqueen ; @irishhappiness ; @kmc1989; @lokislady82 ; @ronearoundblindly

[bwat5-blog]

The Price Of Mercy, And The Weight Of Guilt: Caitlyn Kiramman

**SPOILERS FOR ARCANE**

How Do We Get Here:

Twenty-three year old Caitlyn Kiramman stands in the dark ruins of a Zaunite cannery. In the last few days, she has been beaten, shot at, blown up, abducted nude from her childhood home, and terrorized. Jinx, the person responsible, stands across from Caitlyn at gunpoint:

Jinx moves Caitlyn fires Vi shouts to stop and Caitlyn does, ordering Jinx to drop the gun Caitlyn raises the gun when Jinx doesn't comply and Vi begs- "Wait! She's my sister" Caitlyn keeping the gun on Jinx responds- "Vi, she's too far gone" Jinx lowers the gun. Caitlyn looks to Vi who begs- "no no no" Caitlyn still doesn't shoot. Jinx takes advantage of her indecision and attacks, seizing the weapon and brutally knocking Caitlyn unconscious.

And when Caitlyn is back on her feet, what is the cost of her mercy?

The death of her mother

The deaths of two other councilors

The maiming of two more (one paralyzed from the waist down)

The destruction of the council chamber

The memorial attack- You and I know Jinx wasn't involved but I stand by what I've always said, there's no way they don't think Jinx played some role after what she did

The unavoidable Piltovan response for what Jinx did coming down on Zaun

And we also must consider the crimes Jinx had committed up to that point that Caitlyn as someone who wanted to protect people would be considering as well:

She knows Jinx played a part in Silco's Shimmer operations

She survives Jinx's theft of the stone in which six enforcers were killed by Jinx using a fake childs voice, lighting a building on fire and blowing it up

She survives Jinx's attack on the bridge in which the admittedly corrupt Markus and several Enforcers were killed

Jinx infiltrates Caitlyn's childhood home and takes her while she is naked in her bathroom. She dresses her in her Enforcer clothes and takes her to Zaun. Recent sources from the Artbook seem to confirm she was held for a whole day. And there is some evidence to suggest Jinx tortured her although that is much more speculative

In The Aftermath:

It is with that in mind we can begin to discuss the subject of Caitlyn's guilt and how it impacts her story in season two. Now obviously, the immense trauma of all of those events I listed has a massive impact on Caitlyn, and we have to keep some things in mind regarding all of that:

She is an adult yes, but she is still quite young. Only twenty-three when all of that down and still only twenty-four by the end of the show She essentially has zero time to process/grieve/recover. There is clearly some degree of a time skip between the beginning of S2 E1 and the end, as statues had to be built, and we see progression in Salo and Shoola's healing in particular. But it really doesn't seem like very long. And it's hardly like she was resting. She is providing testimony on what she saw and went through, and taking over the leadership of her family. Despite the astounding felonious stupidity needed to arrive at such an idea, no. Caitlyn's wealth and privilege growing up did not somehow give her an emotional resilience to pain and death. In fact it makes it harder for her in this moment because she had never experienced such things. You cannot be used to a pain you have never felt. This is not complicated. Caitlyn's faith and belief in the system she always believed in has been completely destroyed:

That Caitlyn truly believed the Enforcers were a force for good before all of this is not debatable by anyone discussing this show in good faith. There is plenty of proof supporting this that I don't feel the need to go and pull right now. For any of you "she should have known" folks- Nope. She'd quite literally never been to the Undercity. And we see how the Enforcers behave when Topside repeatedly. No masks, smiling, waving, happy and cheerful. Caitlyn quite literally had lessons from the Sheriff herself on shooting, who spoke to her about protecting their people. We see her belief being chipped away little by little during her meeting Vi and Ekko both. They both make allegations against the Enforcers and logically and reasonably Caitlyn would have no reason to believe but after some resistance she is quiet and listens, processing. This all culminates on the bridge. Markus, who has not been nice to Caitlyn but is still the leader of The Enforcers confronts her and Ekko. She puts her trust in Markus, telling him they have prove and insisting Ekko show him. And then it all comes violently apart as Markus shoots Ekko, and the enforcers with him do nothing when he prepares to shoot Caitlyn.

SUMMARY: In a very short amount of time Caitlyn has her entire reality violently ripped away by the destruction of 4 fundamental parts of her foundation:

Security- Jinx violating the sanctity and safety of her childhood home by taking her at her most vulnerable

Stability- Her mother is violently taken from her leaving a massive hole emotionally and in society that she is expected to fill

Innocence- She is exposed to a tremendous amount of violence she is completely unprepared for

Faith- the system of law and order she dedicated herself to and believes in is ripped away from her and almost kills her

And she has no time to deal with any of it before the violence continues. No time to heal, to grieve, to rest. Ambessa orchestrates the attack on the memorial and we are off to the races. But first, we need to discuss my entire point with this, the impact of Caitlyn's guilt.

Obviously, Caitlyn does blame Jinx. I'm not going to bother with examples because they are beyond obvious. She also hates and is legitimately terrified of Jinx as well which is beyond expected given all that has happened. But I think what is even more damaging for Caitlyn is that she blames herself. We see this reflected in many ways:

1. The last lines of "I can't hear it now" as I pointed out yesterday:

 "I watched the door close for good Cause I couldn't keep it open"

Like I and several others have pointed out, these songs take us into the minds of the characters with their words and tell us important parts of the story (HINT HINT to all of you who complain about missing detail then proudly proclaim how you skip the songs)

This song takes us into Caitlyn's mind in the aftermath of her mother's death. All of the lyrics speak to her characterization in an important way but this topic look at those last two lines. This is essentially her goodbye to her mother, and she doesn't swear revenge. She doesn't proclaim her love. She blames herself.

She had to say goodbye to her mother, because she failed to keep her safe when she could have...

2. Talking with her dad

This one is much more obvious of course. But we get this very sad scene of Caitlyn talking with her father in S2 E1 after the intro song.

Caitlyn is sitting on a couch reading letters of condolence when her father sits next to her, clearly disheveled and not doing well. They are sitting quietly for a bit before Caitlyn tells her father "I had the shot", staring at the floor with glassy tear filled eyes. Her father doesn't say anything in response, just closes his eyes and accepts. Then when he gives her the Kiramman key, she says "I don't deserve it".

3. Talking with Vi

Her conversation with Tobias leads directly into this one. She and Vi share a touching embrace and Vi apologizes to Caitlyn, admitting Powder is gone and insisting if Jayce will fix the gauntlets Vi can take care of this herself with no one else being hurt. But Caitlyn refuses:

"No... No more rogue missions. No more reckless plans. My mother was right. My arrogance led me to take on more than I could handle, and she paid the price".

Again very plain and to the point. With all that has happened and all the factors that played into this situation, she is holding herself responsible.

She failed her mother...

She could have stopped Jinx and didn't...

She doesn't deserve the legacy of her family...

Her mother died because of Caitlyn's arrogance...

SUMMARY: So again sorry to sound like a broken record but I feel like I'm rambling a bit so this helps me to!

Caitlyn has lost her entire foundation for how she views the world in a rapid and extremely violent manner

Her arrogance lead to her mothers death and even given the chance to stop it she still failed her (she believes)

She doesn't deserve the role of leading House Kiramman but has no choice (she believes)

Not related to this (at this point) but its worth mentioning for consideration into her emotional state. Obviously, her relationship with Vi and by extension Vi being Jinx's sister DRAMATICALLY complicates Caitlyn's feeling in all of this

Losing Herself:

** Note it should be obvious moving forward Caitlyn would consider "If I'd stopped Jinx there wouldn't be a memorial because my mom wouldn't be dead" type of scenarios. You get the point. So I'm not gonna mention that kind of thing every time just new stuff**

So we know the memorial attack was orchestrated by Ambessa to exacerbate the conflict between the cities, in hopes of weaponizing Hex-Tech. But specifically we are looking for how this continues to show Caitlyn's guilt is impacting her.

In the aftermath of the attack, Caitlyn is understandable extremely angry and upset. She and Vi are talking and Vi tells her "You have to find a way to call off the invasion" regarding the Council's plan to send a full Enforcer invasion into Zaun to hunt Jinx. Caitlyn angrily says she has no idea how and she has no idea how to fill the hole left by her mother. She and Vi talk and comfort one another, and Caitlyn forms the idea for the small task force, with Vi agreeing to put on the badge to be with her and assist.

Remember:

Caitlyn partially blames herself for this entire mess to begin with

She doesn't feel she deserves to lead her family. To be who her mother was. because she failed her.

The woman she loves tells her SHE has to figure this out. And in Vi's defense she is not blaming or trying to make things harder for Caitlyn. Caitlyn has the status and the family name and all and is realistically their best chance at finding another way. Let's take a look at some other lyrics from I can't hear it now-

"Just tell me how to keep breathing while pretending I'm not drowning"

So Caitlyn turns to what was left behind by her mother. She discovers The Grey. And rather than a massive invasion of heavily armed Enforcers who won't care a lick for Zaunite lives, Caitlyn proposes her plan. A small, targeted team of people, hunting specific targets that are a danger to Zaun and Piltover alike. Using something that will prevent as much bloodshed as possible.

Because it isn't that it DOESN"T matter that she is shoving down her trauma trying to be what's expected of her, that using The Grey in this way is a perversion of her mother's work for Zaun, or that the woman she loves is wearing the badge of her parents killers to stay by her side. Its that it CAN'T matter.

Caitlyn had the shot

Caitlyn failed her mother

Caitlyn has to fix this

**SIDE NOTE BEFORE WE CONTINUE: No. Caitlyn did not make Vi become an Enforcer and I have zero clue where some of you are getting that. What I mean when I say it can't matter to Caitlyn in this state is that I think it's something that when she has had time to heal, and reflect, and just be for a bit, it will be something she wishes she hadn't done. She loves Vi deeply, and asking her to put on that badge and hunt her little sister isn't something Caitlyn would ever do under normal circumstances. And as a steadfast Vi fan, hear me now:

"VI CHOSE TO PUT ON THAT BADGE"

Anyway back to Caitlyn-

Losing Herself- HELLFIRE:

We know what happens from here. Caitlyn gives in more and more to her darker angels in the name of their mission. In the name of justice and making things right to protect people she becomes more violent and angry, to the point that Vi is so afraid of how she is changing we see their first kiss. Once again all we need to do for clarity here is to look into the lyrics that take us into Caitlyn's head:

"Can I do the right thing for the wrong reason? Is it bad that I'm making friends with my demons" (Hellfire)

It almost feels silly analyzing this because it is quite plain. But the amount of people just straight up making things up about Caitlyn's mindset during this time make it worth discussion.

The Strike Team's Objectives:

Dismantle Shimmer: Horrifying drug that turns addicts into monsters if it doesn't kill them first

Neutralize agents still loyal to Silco: Chem-Barons. Dangerous drug lords ripping Zaun apart for their own gain

Find Jinx: We have recapped her crimes enough. You get it.

Clearly these are all good things on their own, and resolving these threats to safety helps Zaun and Piltover. But Caitlyn and her team aren't riding in on white horses to save the day. Caitlyn is losing herself more and more to all of this mounting trauma that is slowly overwhelming her. But she can't stop. She has to fix this.

She had the shot...

Her arrogance killed her mother...

She doesn't deserve to lead her family...

If she'd stopped Jinx there wouldn't have been an attack so even the fact that they are down here at all is Caitlyn's fault as well...

This is her fault...

Caitlyn's Downfall:

And of course this all comes to a head when Caitlyn and Vi finally confront Jinx and Sevika. I have broken this fight down and everything that transpires more times than I can count so I'll spare you all that again. But continuing to tackle this thing through Caitlyn's guilt we can talk about this.

Take everything we have already considered. All of her guilt over mother, her feeling of not deserving her legacy, her guilt over Vi's involvement, and twist that all up with the grief, and trauma, and pain and rage, and fear she has been totally unable to heal from. That absolute shitstorm is rampaging through her entire being. And she is face to face with the living embodiment of all of it.

She is one rifle shot away from justice for everything she hates Jinx for, and blames herself for. A chance to slay her monster. A chance to make things right. And that is all she can see.

She can't see that little girl whose life she is risking

She can't see the woman she loves begging her to stop and standing her way. She even fires striking Vi's gauntlet once and fires again

And then as we all know. That resolution Caitlyn so desperately needs in her mind is taken from her. Vi was completely correct to stop Caitlyn but in her complete emotional and mental overload that just cannot get through to to her. And it all comes down to a moment that, when we consider the guilt of Caitlyn Kiramman, I sincerely doubt she will ever truly forgive herself for

The Commander:

Looking for specific instances for analysis, we really don't get a lot of moments where she is truly lost as "The Commander" to apply to this topic. There is one I will mention very briefly.

When Caitlyn is speaking with Maddie in bed, Maddie does the same sort of baiting we see Ambessa do. Telling Caitlyn she could call it all of, she has the power and so on. It's an ongoing conversation but there is one line particularly I want to mention:

"Not without Jinx"

Now this could certainly just be her continued obsession with Jinx. But if we take everything else into account it doesn't feel that way. She seems tired, and full of regret. If you will indulge a bit of speculation, I go back to the lyrics from Hamilton I quoted frequently in my early days on here when I wrote about Caitlyn's story:

"There are moments when your in so deep, it feels easier to just swim down"

I believe Caitlyn is full of regret, and guilt, and self-hatred for all that has happened. Her betrayal of Vi, her becoming someone she never wanted, all of it. But it has to be worth it. Because she has nothing else left. If she gives up, if she doesn't get Jinx, then at the end of the day it was truly all for nothing. And we get some proof of that when she speaks with Jinx later.

"I've hated you.. hated myself. I just don't have the energy for it any longer"

Conclusion:

Caitlyn's journey is influenced by so many things. And I feel like I ended up just sort of digging into her arc as I have done many times again to a point. But I hope you get something out of this. I certainly did by writing it as I always do, because I love this story. I wanted to try and dig into the part of her that is being driven by that self-doubt, and guilt, all born from a truly spectacular act of mercy. Caitlyn would have been well within her rights to obliterate Jinx then and there, and instead spares her. Changing her life forever in ways good and bad alike.

Thank you and take care!

[ladykailitha]

The Caged Bird Still Sings Part 23

Here we are, the penultimate chapter. And the second sex scene. So definitely be forewarned there. This is the chapter where they talk and Steve explains the title. Well, they both do really.

I'm sad to see this story end, but I've got so many good stories waiting in the wings so it's a good thing, too.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22

~

Steve was waiting up in the foray of the hotel lobby reading the newspaper when Eddie and the rest of Corroded Coffin got in.

He looked up at the sound of the chains and jewelry jingling above the hushed whispers. They all looked happy and excited. Which meant their day with Mike went well. Which was good.

Eddie spotted Steve first and stopped in his tracks, as around him the boys rough housed. Then one by one they too spotted Steve. They took in what he was wearing and teased Eddie before they left him standing there, staring at Steve, frozen in place.

Steve was wearing a white suit with a sheer white mesh top, so that it neatly showed off his hairy chest and happy trail. His hair was artfully styled and the whole outfit was topped off with black designer boots. In other words he sat there looking like sex on legs.

Eddie ran his fingers through his hair as he placed the other hand on his hip. “Damn, little Canary, you look good enough to eat.”

Steve smirked, licking his upper lip. He put away the newspaper carefully and deliberately. Then he stood up and Eddie was able to take in the full effect including that delicious show of the outline of Steve’s cock.

Eddie crooked his finger and Steve came willingly. Eddie tugged on the golden chain around Steve’s neck and pulled out the gold and citrine canary necklace that Eddie had given to Steve that first day at the hotel.

“Are you mine, baby?” he purred. “Have you decided that you’ll take everything I have to offer. But especially me?”

Steve nodded looking into his eyes. “Everyone kept calling me a kept man or sugar baby to your sugar daddy. But both of those things imply that I’m accepting everything you gave in exchange for sex. But we’ve only ever had sex the once.”

Eddie smiled softly. “That’s right, little Canary. You’re not either of those things. So what are you then?”

“I’m a caged bird,” Steve replied with a soft smile. “The price for a roof over my head and all my needs met is a cage. On that is open for me to fly out at any time, but why would I want to? Not when I have you to take care of me.”

“The caged bird still sings,” Eddie said, his smile growing, “because it is loved and cared for, is that it?”

Steve’s smile transformed into a grin. “Yeah.”

“I like the metaphor, little Canary,” Eddie breathed and then pressed his lips to Steve’s, his fingers still wrapped around the necklace, keeping Steve tethered to him.

Steve wrapped his arms around Eddie’s neck and leaned into the kiss. Eddie’s free hand slid under the jacket of the suit and to the small of Steve’s back, pressing them even further together.

“You look too pretty to just take you up to your room and rip those delicious clothes off,” Eddie murmured. “So let me at least buy you a drink in the hotel bar and chat you up a bit first.”

Steve giggled and nuzzled their noses together. “I think that sounds like a great idea, Eddie.”

Eddie shivered at the sheer desire in Steve’s voice. It took everything in his power to take that step back, and slide his hand into Steve’s. Then he led the way to the bar and ordered them both a drink.

“So what made you decide you wanted this with me, darlin’?” Eddie purred as he swirled around the whiskey in his hand.

Steve cocked his head to side as he sincerely thought about it. “I think the first step was bitching out Chrissy for her ideas about us. I wasn’t going to let her chose the narrative of someone she had only met once in a dimly lit bar. I may have been a queen bitch in high school, but trust me, I won’t stand for people talking shit about me behind my back if I can help it.”

“That was an impressive speech you gave, little Canary,” Eddie murmured, rubbing his thumb over Steve’s knuckles.

“Like before you came back,” Steve murmured, running his fingers through his hair nervously, “I had even wondered if the only reason I wasn’t your sugar baby was because you were on tour. But then you came home and were so respectful, it kind of pushed those thoughts out of my head.”

Eddie smiled gently and took Steve’s hand to give it a squeeze. “That was what I was hoping I was doing.”

“Congrats, it really worked,” Steve replied with a chuckle. “Then when I met your uncle and saw his home and the life you had given him.” He shook his head fondly. “Then you said that me marrying you for buy me a house was an incentive and not a deterrent...I–”

“And you wanted that too,” Eddie finished for him. “Make no mistake, little Canary, I will buy you a house with everything you’ve every wanted in a home and make it ours.

Steve blushed and then got this far away look in his eyes and sighed wistfully. “Then when you got out of your car to pick up Mike, it was the hottest thing I’d ever seen and I wanted all of it. I want to be your little Canary, I want to sing for you in all the ways I know how. So Robin helped me pick out the outfit to seduce you in.”

“Consider me seduced,” Eddie purred. “I wasn’t lying when I said you looked good enough to eat.”

Steve blushed and ducked his head. He looked up at Eddie through his lashes. “I can’t wait for you to take care of me.”

Eddie’s eyes widen and his nostrils flared as his desire ramped up. “Damn, little Canary, I’m going to make you feel so good, you’ll think you rocketed to the moon with all the stars you’ll be seeing.”

Steve through back his head and laughed. “I wasn’t aiming for an innuendo, but I really still should have seen that one coming–” He stopped to snort at his own joke. “Wrong word! God!”

Eddie burst out laughing too. “Someone’s got sex on the brain today,” he smirked, wagging his eyebrows.

“Have you looked in the mirror, babe?” Steve purred. “I’m pretty sure you short-circuited poor Mike’s brain when you stepped out of that sports car. It took everything I had not jump you right there in front of the thirteen year old.”

“I wasn’t really thinking about what I was wearing today,” Eddie said with a huff of laughter. He took a sip of his whiskey, his other hand never leaving Steve’s. “I just threw on what was clean and that I would be comfortable recording in.”

Steve smiled. “Well it worked on me.”

Eddie hummed his agreement.

They talked and had a couple of drinks, just reveling in each other’s company. Like they were slotted into each other’s lives like they had always been right there.

Then Eddie stood up and gently led Steve up the elevator to Eddie’s room. It was almost identical to Steve’s, but minus all the bird paraphernalia and instead covered with guitars and band merch.

His hands came up and slowly slid Steve’s suit jacket off his shoulders and on to the floor. Steve smirked, but allowed Eddie to undress him. Eddie untucked the shirt and got his fingertips on the happy trail that had been tantalizing him all night.

Steve let out a little gasp of pleasure as Eddie’s thumbs caught in his belt loops, pulling them closer together. Then the shirt came off and Eddie sank to his knees, pulling on the belt to undo it. He unbottoned and unzipped the pants.

Eddie licked his lips at the sight before him. “Naughty boy, going commando in those tight pants. You must be a sin.”

“I thought I was your angel,” Steve breathed, burying his hands into his own hair, back arching from the sheer want rolling off Eddie in waves. “I’m pretty sure you called me heaven sent at the very least.”

Eddie’s head rocked back and looked up from the tasty, teasing morsel in front of him. “You remember that?”

Steve grinned. “I don’t remember a lot about what happened that, but yeah. I called you sin and you called me heaven sent.”

“Well, I take it back, baby,” Eddie said, returning his attention back on the bounty in front of him. “You’re sin and I’m the sinner.” He slid Steve’s pants down his legs and then gently removed each boot until Steve was standing in front of him stark naked and looking good enough to eat.

“I’m going to feast tonight,” he murmured and then slowly stood back up. He kissed Steve deeply as Steve wrapped his arms around his neck, his hands going for that gorgeous ass. He swept Steve off his feet and carried him laughingly to the bed.

He gently laid Steve on the bed and then began to strip himself. Steve propped himself up on his elbows as he watched Eddie uncover more and more of his skin. And that’s when he spotted it; a new tattoo.

Right where the torso met the leg was a little yellow canary.

“See something you like, sweetheart?” Eddie said lasciviously. He crawled on the bed and straddled Steve’s thighs.

Steve flopped back onto the pillows and his thumb rubbed the tattoo. Then he looked up adoringly at Eddie. “When did you get that?”

“You like that?” Eddie teased and then kissed him on the lips. He whispered into Steve’s ear, “I got that in Indy the day after I met you, baby.”

Steve moaned, throwing his head back. “It took me four months to realize I was in love with you, but here you are going out and getting a tattoo about me the next day! I thought I was unhinged.”

“Sorry, Stevie,” Eddie cackled, “but you had me hooked since day one.”

He grabbed the lube from his nightstand and pressed a kiss to Steve’s neck. “I’ve spent so much time jerking off to that first time because it was all I could think about.”

Steve’s body shuddered with desire and lust. “I’ve come thinking about you, too. Your voice has the power to turn me on like nothing else.”

“You like my voice, baby?” Eddie purred as ground down, causing Steve to gasp. “You like it when I talk to you?” Steve nodded, biting on his lip.

“The things I’m going to do to you, pretty boy,” he continued, his free hand tracing the lines of Steve’s torso, going low.

Steve grabbed Eddie’s thighs for dear life as Eddie kept grinding their cocks together.

“I’m going to lube you up,” Eddie purred. “I’m going spread those pretty thighs, so deliciously thick.” He slithered down the bed to bite Steve’s left thigh, causing Steve’s back to arch off the bed.

Eddie spread his legs, kissing and biting where he could. “Then I’m going to start with one finger all nice and slick from the lube.”

Action followed his words and he pressed one finger into Steve’s hole.

“Oh god!” Steve breathed. “It feels so good.”

Eddie continued to work at Steve’s hole, pushing in and out as his other hand wandered over his thighs, his stomach, his sides, everywhere but his cock.

“Then I’m going to add a second finger,” Eddie purred. “Really work you open.”

He must have hit a really good spot because Steve shuddered and moaned. “Look at you, little Canary. Singing for me.”

Steve’s sounds got louder and more enthusiastic with that little encouragement.

Eddie kept describing what he was going to do and then doing until Steve was on the edge and was as open as Eddie could comfortably get him.

“You ready, baby?” he asked, lining up his cock.

“Yes, Eddie,” Steve begged. “I need you fuck me so good. I need it.”

As Eddie slid in he leaned over to kiss Steve filthily on the mouth. “And whatever you need I’m here to give it to you.”

Steve whimpered. “You’re so good to me.”

“It is my honest pleasure.”

Eddie began thrusting deep inside him, Steve continuing to make the most delicious sounds as they fucked.

“Touch me, Eddie,” Steve murmured. “Let me come. I want to come, please. I need it, so much.”

“”You’ve got it, Stevie,” he said softly. “I want us to come together, do you think you can hold off just a little more?”

Steve’s eyes were wide and blown with desire. “I’ll try. For you.”

Eddie pressed a kiss to Steve’s jaw. “I know. You’re so good to me.”

He gently took Steve’s cock in hand and began to slide up and down in time with his thrusts.

Soon Steve was arching off the bed. “Please, Eddie!”

“Go ahead, baby,” Eddie moaned. “Come for me.”

He jerked his hips one more time and was coming in Steve as he spurted out ribbon after ribbon of cum all over his chest.

Eddie’s eyes fluttered shut as he finished. He slowly opened his eyes and saw that Steve was completely blissed out underneath him.

He pressed a quick kiss to Steve’s jaw and then got up to clean them off. When he came back with a wet hand towel, he had to stop and stare at the sight before him.

Steve had one arm thrown behind his head and the other hand was pressed into the cooling cum on his stomach, panting for breath.

“Did I wear you out, little Canary?” Eddie teased as he loped over to the bed.

“Fuck, Eddie,” he murmured. “If this how sex is going to be all the time, I don’t think I’ll ever get out of bed ever again.”

Eddie chuckled and then got to work cleaning up his newly minted boyfriend. Then he tucked them into the large bed.

“I love you, sweetheart,” he whispered into Steve’s ear as they curled up together.

Steve pecked his lips. “I love you too, Eddie. So much.”

Then they drifted off to sleep together.

~

Tag List: CLOSED

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10- @fearieshadow @kultiras @thesecondfate @tartarusknight @genderless-spoon

[dumbftmslut19]

Warning k9 kink ahead

I'm just imagining dogsitting for a nice wealthy man while he's at work. He has a big needy puppy who always wants to be around someone. He pays me very well to go to his house every weekday and take care of his dog, Baxter.

Baxter has always been very curious, and he loves sniffing my crotch despite the many times I try to get him to stop. But one day, after several weeks of this, I just give in. Maybe if i let him sniff, he'll stop doing this. So once his owner is gone, I sit on the couch and spread my legs a bit, allowing Baxter to come over and sniff my pants. He gets excited, and his tail starts wagging as he sniffs and licks at my pants. After a minute, i decide that's enough, and I push him away and close my legs. I didn't think much of it in the moment, but when I got home and did my nightly masturbation, I couldn't help but think about Baxter desperately licking at my crotch. I couldn't stop my mind from wandering and the next thing I know, I'm cumming hard as I imagine him licking my bare pussy.

So the next day I go in, even more curious. Once I'm sure his owner is gone, I slip out of my pants and boxers and sit on the couch. I keep my legs closed, and I question whether I should really be doing this. But as soon as Baxter comes running over, I instinctively open my legs.

As soon as i feel his snout pressed into my clit and his rough tongue over my folds, I let out the most pathetic moan I've ever heard. I buck my hips up as he laps away at my soaked cunt. I try to resist but soon I'm cumming all over his tongue which only makes him lick faster. After a minute, I push him away and try to regain my composure before his owner gets back. Im so ashamed of myself but it felt better than anything I've ever felt in my life.

The next day, I do it again, and the next, and the next, until it is a normal part of my routine. Then, one day, I decide to strip completely naked and bend over on the floor. I don't know why I decided to do it, but all I know is that as soon as I did, Baxter jumped on me. He dug his claws into my sides and I felt his cock poke out of it's sheath. I felt him rut against my pussy and I panic. I've never taken any cock before, is this how I want it to happen? With a dog? At the last moment i try to squirm away but it's too late. He nips at my neck as a warning not to move as his huge, throbbing, red cock finds my virgin hole. He presses himself inside as I let out a mixture of a moan and a scream. This only makes him go faster and harder until I feel his knot force its way into my cunt. I let out a scream at the realization that I've been knotted. The panic and shame mixed with pleasure gave me the strongest orgasm of my life. Once the waves of pleasure have subsided and I feel his cum filling my hole, I try to push myself out from under him but I realize I can't. I'm stuck. His knot is locked in my cunt and I can't escape.

I panic, but it does nothing. I only have one option, I have to wait.

As I'm laying there on the floor with this massive dog standing over me, cock firmly stuck in my pussy, I hear a noise. I look up at the clock and see the time. Oh my god. His owner is back. I try desperately to pull away, but Baxter just bites my shoulder hard, and I know I can't do anything.

I hear the door unlock and footsteps getting closer. I hear the man stop in the dorway and a small chuckle.

"Y'know, I've been watching from the camera on the bookshelf, but it's so much better to see this in person." I hear his owner say.

I let out a whimper and hear the man getting closer. I feel his hand grab my hair and pull my head back, so I am looking him in the eyes as he speaks "I knew you were a knotty slut. Now, if you don't want the world to see the recording of the nanny cam, you will come back tomorrow and help relieve Baxter here again, and then you can help me. Got it?". I whimper and nod weakly.

I guess this is my job now

[bloodywankers]

tw; yandere, manipulation, controlling behaviour, forced marriage, cult analogy, slight misogyny blue lock chris prince | politician au | 3.4k words | unedited | turn your brain off while reading plz | blue lock masterlist

Politics is a hard career, especially when you’re honest to a fault and inflexible. You should be able to look past things, close your eyes and turn your back here and there. That’s what Chris thought, at least. His life is so much easier when he spews whatever words are trending that week and makes a few promises people will forget by the time the next big thing happens. Just smile and wave. It’s not like anyone would find out about all his back door deals, and even if they tried to, the crime rate in the city is high, it’s not uncommon for nosey journalists to get into hot water with some roaming criminal. To show up mangled and bloody the next morning on the news. 

“And that’s why I pledge to help reduce the crime rate in our city!” The blond proclaimed loudly as a string of chants left the audience. Politics is easy when people are naturally attracted to you and blindly follow whatever nonsense you come up with. As people started to quiet down, Chris said his goodbyes, and reporters swarmed him as he left, one after another. Asking about anything from his latest policies to what he thought about some recent events the media wouldn’t shut up about. Not that he planned to answer any of them, it's hard to keep up with all your lies when there’s no premeditated script. And anyway, he's a busy man, he has places to be and things to do and can’t afford to waste his precious time on something so trivial. 

“What’s on my schedule now?” 

“You were invited to a college gathering, after that, you’re scheduled to have dinner with the police commissioner.” 

He said entering his car, the drive would be short, and the venue selected was nearby after all. 

“I won’t stay long, make sure to be on standby—” 

He said, exiting the vehicle, but his sentence was cut short as the male bumped into someone, looking down to find a woman, clearly distraught for whatever reason. 

“Ah… I’m really sorry; I wasn’t looking where I was going.” She said, offering a polite bow before walking off, too preoccupied with whatever was on her phone screen to care much for who he was. Not that he minded, it's easier when they don’t recognise him. “Anyway, as I was saying, I’ll call you before I'm about to come out, so make sure to be on standby, we can’t afford to be late to the meeting with the commissioner.” Chris said, walking into the venue as he heard a faint ‘Yes sir.’ in the background. 

It was easy to spot the tables reserved for the reunion, what with the chatter, loud greetings from old classmates bragging about their success and offering of unwarranted financial advice to fill their own pockets. It was a diverse bunch, well, as diverse as one from an elite university could be. 

“Chris!” One of the men exclaimed, waving at the man to catch his attention. The blond couldn't help but wince at the sight, from his loosened tie and red cheeks, Chris could tell he was drunk, the unmistakable stench of alcohol coming from him upon closer inspection only further proof of it. Not that he cared; he was only here to offer polite greetings and sit around for a while before leaving. Just enough to fulfil whatever common courtesy required he does.

“It’s so hard to get a hold of you these days. You're acting like one of those big politicians now that you've become a mayoral candidate.” Another classmate slurred in a drunken stupor, Chris couldn't care enough to remember who he was. 

“Come on, you know how busy it is, I barely get time to do anything at all with elections coming up.” He replied, a large smile and boisterous laughter following suit, careful not to let any displeasure slip out. “You have to help me out once you become mayor, I've been telling everyone how we used to be best buddies back in college, same soccer team and all. Let me in on any juicy stock info you get your hands on.” The blond didn't offer a concrete reply, instead pouring the stranger more alcohol. He couldn’t wait to leave. 

“Anyways, you’ll never guess what happened earlier. Y’know [name]?” The bottle in Chris’s hands almost dropped as he turned towards the man. There were few names he remembered, even fewer that could warrant such a reaction. 

“Yeah, the one you used to be super into, chairman [last name]’s daughter? I remember I even have pictures of you two from graduation. Yeah, she came in earlier. Apparently, she cut ties with him and became a school teacher.” 

“A school teacher?” All dignity he had upheld previously was thrown out the window as Chris leaned forward, eyes set on the man speaking, resembling more a nosy housewife than a seasoned politician. 

“Yeah, she's hot as hell now, too, look on the far left on the table in front of you.” 

It was embarrassing to admit that he still thought about you, not when you two ended it all on such a bad note before you graduated and you vanished from sight. He couldn’t help but be curious as to what you looked like now if you still had the same habits and if you would still look at him with the same contempt as you did before. Truth be told, he still wasn’t over it, even after all this time. 

“That’s [name]?” 

“Yep.” 

What a coincidence, he thought. You’re the one he had bumped into earlier. He hadn’t paid attention back then, but you had the same hair and dress; he was sure it was you, now that he heard it, you have the same voice as well. Maybe it was destiny. He couldn't help what happened next, almost as if his body moved instinctively. 

“Hey, if it isn’t [name]! You remember me?” Maybe others would have thought it shameless to approach someone when their distaste for you was well known throughout the cohort, but if Chris had even an ounce of shame, he probably wouldn't have made it as far as he had done. 

“Sorry?” You looked uncomfortable, now that you could look at his face clearly, he was sure he recognised him. It would be insulting if you had forgotten him after only a few years. 

“I’m not sure…” Look at you avoiding eye contact, how cute. 

“S’a shame, we used to be real close back in college.” He had just rolled his eyes moments ago when a classmate claimed they used to be close friends, and now here he was using the same trick. Inviting himself to the spot next to you, someone was already seated there, what with the half-drunk glass of water and plate of food placed there, but seeing as they were nowhere to be found, he was sure they wouldn’t mind moving. 

He tried striking up a conversation with you, trying any possible way he could to be closer to you than he already was, it felt so refreshing to see you after all these years. In contrast to his lovestruck state, you tried brushing him off a few times, changing the discussion to something others could join in on, distracting him just enough to slip away. Ask about his recent TV interview or political career. Unfortunately for you, he was a master conversationalist, Chris knew what you were doing and, if anything, found your attempts to distance yourself quite adorable. 

However, unfortunately for him, time passed faster than he would like to admit, his driver having to escort him out before he missed his dinner plans. He cursed himself for not asking for your number, considering the sheer amount of people there, he was sure you would have agreed, after all, it would be hard to reject him in front of them all if you were still as much of a pushover as you were back then. 

/ 

You never liked Chris, if anything, you dreaded the moment he started approaching you. No single event caused this distaste; rather, it was just the discomfort that came with being with someone so sociable. He had a bad habit of forcing you out of your comfort zone, whether he realised it or not. But you were sure he did. 

You were eager to push back your chair and storm out of the gathering at any moment. Had it not been for your old classmate who insisted you attend this time around, that it had been ‘far too long’ and that you’d never seemed to attend the get-togethers she organised’, maybe you would have ignored the invitation sent your way this time as well. However, despite the unpleasant run-in with Chris, the event went well. No one spoke too much of your fallout with your father or how you practically threw your degree aside to pursue a career as a ‘meagre teacher’ this time. Not nearly as much as they did in the past, at least. And you managed to come home early, so while you had no intentions of putting yourself through that again, you thought it had gone quite well. 

Furthermore, you were tired of uprooting your life time and time again, and you enjoyed your new work as a kindergarten teacher. Children had always had a soft spot in your heart, and you couldn’t help but melt when they tried to act grown-up or pronounce big words or even just waddle around the classroom that looked so large from their eyes. You worked at a good school, not the most outstanding but decent regardless, so you were rightly taken aback when you were informed that a politician would be visiting, something about wanting to promote his campaign. You were sure there were better ways to go about that than visiting a school with children who couldn't care less if he did want to bomb innocent civilians or not.  

But that was that, and you didn’t linger on it too much, not until you saw a familiar set of blond hair walk in, slicked back and in his signature suit. Surrounded by a crew of cameramen and assistants hoping to catch every second to not miss what could’ve been the next big headline. 

You could feel your heart drop as he flashed a grin your way. All left for you to do was pray that the amount of cameras surrounding him would put him off from approaching you too much. 

He was good with children, just about as good as he was with most people, making sweet promises and spewing encouraging words their way. 

“[name]! Fancy seeing you here as well.” He said, motioning you to join him as he painted with some of the children. The familiarity he used to refer to you caused the cameraman to immediately perk up. 

“You know, miss [name]?” One of the kids asked. 

“No, it’s not—” 

“Yep! Me and your teacher go way back!” The people present on sight seemed to be eating this up, Chris merely laughed and went on colouring, trying to attempt polite conversation with you here and there. 

You were sure he knew what he was doing. He’s no fool; if there is anyone who should know the weight of words, it should be him, the one who made a career out of them. So you waited until the crew slowly left, and the children were all taken by their parents before letting out your frustrations on him. 

“What’s your problem?!” 

Maybe you could’ve been more mature about how you went about this, voiced your concerns like a responsible adult and asked for his understanding instead of lashing out like this. But Chris had never been one to care about others’ feelings, so you were sure reasoning with him would have been in vain. 

“You weren’t just visiting some kids; there was an entire hoard of cameras behind you. You know this better than anyone else. ‘go way back??’ What are you trying to do?” 

“We both went to the same college. It isn’t a lie to say we were well acquainted. At least up until you decided to run off to who knows where.” If you weren’t so focused on the man in front of you, maybe you would have noticed the one hidden behind a nearby wall–the cameraman from earlier.–“That was years ago. You gain nothing out of doing this, so why-!” You stopped yourself mid-sentence, reminded of the futility of arguing with someone as thick-headed as him and the frustration that would ensue afterwards. Rubbing your temple in hopes of relieving some of the tension before walking away, offering Chris one last glare as you did. If you had stayed for longer, maybe you would have seen red that dusted on his uncharacteristically blank face or the shoddy attempt to cover it with his hand as he stared at your figure until it disappeared out of sight. 

/ 

You had always avoided the spotlight, especially from strangers, but the very next morning, even before whatever they were filming at the school had aired, there was already article after article featuring pictures of you and Chris together from the day before. He didn’t expect it to come out so soon, but it didn’t feel unpleasant to see photos of you two in every cheap tabloid in the city–even if you were just standing together. And while most of the rumours were fuelled by speculation alone, he could already picture your reaction of sheer panic. After all, you were still the same [name] he remembered, the same one he had created. You would curse yourself for allowing this to have happened as if you could’ve never predicted your entire life would be turned upside-down because of an ex you hadn’t talked to in years. 

Few knew this, but Chris Prince had two loves in his life–politics, the one everyone was sure to guess, and his college sweetheart, [name]. The one he could never manage to charm no matter what he said or did, the one that saw through his act and saw him for what he was. A slave to society, the worst type of human, with no morals or convictions besides what would make him the most money or give him the most praise. But you failed to notice one thing about him, and that was his conviction to make you his own little passion project. Where he took the plain quiet [name] and turned her into something nobody could look away from but could never touch because you would be his. His diamond in the rough, the one that he found and polished. Somehow, Chris succeeded in inserting himself into your life, not a boyfriend–you had never made it official–but not a friend. Because friends don’t decide what you wear or eat or who you talk to or kiss you in the empty classroom. Looking back on it, he was probably one of the main reasons you left it all behind as soon as you graduated, disappeared off the face of the earth and didn’t contact anyone you knew up until that point. He made you realise how unfit you were for that world and how quickly you buckled under pressure. Once you settled into teaching, a passion you didn’t know you had, you thought you could leave it all behind. Live as you wanted, if only you hadn’t run into that old classmate who instantly recognised you and insisted you attend. If only you weren’t spineless and incapable of saying no when it mattered. 

Even so, like a fool, you hoped nothing would change, but absence makes the heart grow fonder, and Chris thought it was time you come back to your rightful place. You ran off at such an inconvenient time, right when he started taking off in the eyes of the public. He was still young and inexperienced, and so he made the mistake of letting you slip out of his grasp, one he regretted until he met you again that day. Now that you were on his home turf, he couldn’t just let you go again. So, as he raved about the rights of women, he thought about all the ways he would tie you down until you couldn't even think of leaving him. 

That’s why his crew that day consisted of such loose-lipped people, that’s why he let those remarks slip and didn’t react even when all sorts of rumours about you two spread. After all, Chris had always been one to skillfully dodge questions about marriage, the type that seemed uninterested in anything that wouldn’t increase his approval ratings so this was bound to be something big. At least, that’s what most people thought. Now, as he dialled your phone number, all that was left was to see how much his acting had improved. 

“Hello?” Your voice was faint, he could tell you were a wreck right now. 

“[name]? You have to help me, otherwise, I’ll lose it all!” 

If Chris’ grin wasn’t as wide as it was, anyone seeing him would think he was equally–if not more– shaken by the recent events than you were. You most certainly did as he went on a spiel about how the career he worked so hard to build all these years is about to crumble, all because of you. No sane person would believe any of this but your state was far from it. You had never fared well under stress after all. 

“Help you…? What could I possibly do?” You spoke so softly he couldn’t believe just yesterday your words were laced with pure spite. That’s when he said something so ridiculous even he couldn’t believe himself. 

“We have to make it seem like we’re in a relationship. Some old classmates released photos from college–the rumours are getting out of hand nothing I say will be enough to quench them, please understand it’s so close to elections I can’t lose when I’m so close. [name], please!” It wasn’t a complete lie, photos from college had been leaked, but he wasn’t entirely helpless. Chris could, if he wanted to, pull some strings. But this was just so much more entertaining, to see you walk straight into his grasp again. 

Most people would laugh at his sorry excuses, curse and hang up but most also think they’re immune to cults until they’ve been fully indoctrinated into thinking aliens have invaded us and that death is the only solution. Your little disappearing stunt had been troublesome but years of work had not yet been undone. The way you dressed was still as he had taught you, your figure was still the one he worked you to the bone to obtain and your posture the one he made sure you’d never deviate from. The only difference was that even you couldn’t see through him anymore, after all, there was nothing to see. 

Once you were within his grasp everything else came easy, like a slippery slope you could never climb back from. First, it started with publicly announcing a relationship that never existed. Then a marriage under the pretext that nobody would take him seriously if he just messed around with a girlfriend like a child. If you ever questioned him he would just flip the narrative on its head, it was your fault this happened, you almost ruined his career, are you sure you didn’t do all this to marry him? It’s okay, he’ll love you regardless because he’s a kind, loving husband. And eventually, it’ll become a reality, you–just like everyone else–will convince yourself you’re undeserving of someone like him. 

‘You want to have children? You’re right, it’s about time we have a couple running around, anything for my wife!’ He’s glad all those run-ins with large happy families and visits to children's hospitals and orphanages paid off, otherwise, he’s had to use more… unsavoury methods.

‘You’ll have to quit your job because of the pregnancy? It’s okay I’ll take care of you!’ He was getting tired of it anyway, now he can have you all to himself.

Even if one day you wake up from your trance, it’s too late now because there’s nothing left of you but the parts that constitute Chris Prince’s wife. If the eyes are the window to the soul then Chris must have long sold his and now he’s ridden you of yours too.