#all i'm saying! is that jame and tori care about their people SO MUCH!

[after-nine-at-the-oasis]

I FINISHED EPISODE SEVEN AND AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

😭😭😭😭💔❤️ ISAAAAAAC 😭 MY BOYYY <3333 HE DOES NOT DESERVE THIS ❤️❤️😭 I LOVE HIM!! I hope that art piece helped though :')). Also poor James 😭 xd. But hey at least he's supportive (though the way I was like :'O and then he said "you just haven't found the right person yet" and I went -.- xD. Except a little more like sigh raise eyebrow with a bit of a smile bc :/ you were so close xDD). But seriously Isaac 😭😭❤️❤️ my guy. I love him. I hope he figures it out soon :( :')) <3333.

TAO AND ELLLLLE!!!! AAAAHHHHHHH :'DDD. The GROWTH from Tao, can we talk about that?!!! He :D! I mean he was definitely thrown off at first but that's okay :')). Then he was supportive and lovely and your honor I love him 😭. And ELLE!! OUR GIRL GOT ACCEPTED :D!!! AND HAD HER ART DISPLAYED!! HECK YEAH GIRL :DDD!! AND ALSO THE ART WAS T H E M I'M NOT OKAY 😭😭❤️❤️🥰.

Also, everyone else at that exhibition: :D- YOO those are the people!!

(like the ones in the picture lol)

Anyway I love them your honor thank you <3 xD

SLAYYY NICK GO OFF!! TO YOUR DAD AND YOUR BROTHER AND EVERYBODY :DDD!!!

AND SLAYYY CHARLIE GO OFF!! TO BEN YOU SLAYED :DDD!!!

Also gosh that DINNER. Was (yes that period's on purpose I'm making it clear it's not "that dinner was", but just "it was" without the it) the most awkward thing I've ever seen xD. I mean not really but it was pretty bad xD.

Just imagining though lol like,

Nick: I don't care what you think

Charlie's parents: *trying to look as far away as they can*

Nick's mom: You don't have a right!

Charlie's parents: wow yeah this for is really good huh, yeah. . .

XDD I just can't lol

Anyway xD!

But AYYYY NICK DID IT HE CAME OUT AND EVERYTHING WENT OKAY I MEAN LIKE. IN THE END xD :D!!! 🥰🥰

Also Tori GO. OFF!! The grab of David's arm and the kick of his phone xD, girl SLAY!!! We love her so much in this house 🥰🥰🥰. Also her and Charlie playing video games was really sweet :'DD

Anyway I am sorry your dad and brother suck Nick <333

I do hate your brother though so there's that 🥰🥰 punched the bed repeatedly during the dinner scene and of course whisper screamed my head off <33

And AAAAHHHHHHH Charlie not eating much :')) I noticed I during the meal and then the brought it UP too 😭😭💔. Help I'm not okay <333. We can get through this :')). Me and them xdd. Them all, surrounding this, lol.

Also Nick looking up eating disorders 😭😭😭💔❤️❤️ it broke me but it was really sweet <33 he's worried about Charlie :'(( (kinda the reason for the sweet and kinda a separate statement, it's also sweet for like trying to understand reasons and whatnot)

And AAAHHHHHH NICK AND CHARLIE ARE GOING TO PROM TOGETHER :DDD listen I love them so much <333 and all of the so much :D!!

Also Imogen so sorry you're still the token straight xD but slay for you Sahar :D

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH DARCYYYY 😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔.

HONEYYYY!!! I'M SO SORRY AND ALSO I LOVE YOU SO MUCH 😭😭😭💔❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Y'all as soon as I saw the purple stuff around the door I died :') help I'm not okay <333 but more importantly help Darcy :((( worry about her before me D':

Gotta say though her outfit slays so hard and AAHHHH everybody helping to pay for it :'DDD <333 I love them all so much. Also her and Tara were being ADORABLE!! And Tara's mom was hilarious in that first scene lol xD mood.

Anyway AAAHHHHHHHH MY POOR GIRL 😭😭😭😭😭❤️❤️💔❤️. I really hope she's okay (I mean as okay as she can be) :((( ik there's other stuff but whatever honey my love go to Tara's <333

My poor babey 😭💔❤️

Anyway, amaaazing episode, I love them all so much <3333 🥰🥰❤️ I'm also not ready for the next episode :')) 😭

And awww, the last episode 😭😭❤️💔. This was the second to last episode :'(( :')). Should I have split it into two days to savor it more? Maybe. Did I? Absolutely not lol. Anyway, this season is so good and I'm gonna miss I so much xdd <3. Immediately lol. Especially if there's a cliffhanger or something (which I feel like I might've seen someone mention but it was just a glimpse so they may have been talking about another episode lol).

ANYWAY!!! Lovely 🥰🥰🥰. NOW ONTO EPISODE EIGHT!!!

[mlmxreader]

Eeee! Hello, hello! Hope you'redoing well, my friend! OMG THE COLLECTION OF BABIES!!!! 😫🥹😭 They're so adorable, I absolutely cannot for my heart can only take so much of the cuteness!

Alright, these are for the "Want to know me better, send a number" asks, if you're still taking them:

5: Book/series I reread?

138: Do I believe in second chances?

150: What is the best decision I have made in life so far?

107: Guilty pleasure?

212: Was I named after anyone?

216: Favourite fictional character?

215: What is the weirdest talent I have?

193: What motivates me?

191: What makes me the happiest?

192: What is “home” to me?

78: Early bird or night owl?

98: 3 things I love?

99: 3 things I hate?

65: What fictional universe would I like to be a part of?

62: Am I vegetarian/vegan/pescatarian?

60: Pet peeve?

59: Afraid of heights?

41: Do I have any strange phobias?

39: Am I superstitious?

25: Actor/actress you trust enough to watch whatever they're in?

20: Favourite video games?

19: Song that I always start my shuffle with/wake-up song/always-on-a-loop song?

17: Pirates or ninjas?

6: Aliens or ghosts?

Take care and until next time, keep safe! (Will get to the Delaney fic, eventually, hoping I'll be able to get to it this coming weekend or the weekend after but I am so freaking excited to read about our babe James!!)

🖤🖤🖤

🐍anon

hi!!!!!!!!!! I am doing well, thank you - I've got work every day this week in the AM, with the exception of Thursday and Friday bc I'm doing double shifts but I've got Saturday and Sunday off, so that's good!

SIX babies!!! Hanzo is the only literal baby, he's only a couple of weeks old and he's 1.2cm so he's a TEENY baby 😭 teeny tiny baby scorpling 🥺

alright!!! let's go!!!

5: American Psycho, All Quiet on the Western Front and The Great Gatsby I tend to read more than once a year, so I'll go w them lmfao

138: it depends. if someone didn't mean any actual harm and they're willing to change and they're doing so ACTIVELY, then yes. but if it's bc of some form of bigotry (racism, transphobia, misogyny, homophobia, classism, ableism, sanism, islamophobia, antisemitism, etc)? no. get fucked.

150: getting tattoos and exotic animals lmao I love my reptilian and arachnid children and I love my tattoos

107: classic Monster!! I personally love Assault the best, but I can never say no to classic!

212: Llywelyn comes from the name Llywelyn ab Iorwerth, aka Llywelyn Fawr (Llewelyn the Great), a Welsh king; it's a chance to show off my culture and my heritage and my history that - for the most part - has been erased by the English.

216: definitely Aragorn. cannot lie. it's Aragorn

215: I have an odd talent for being able to calm down snakes, including wild ones, and getting them to chill out - which I discovered during college whilst working w a 10ft python who was really defensive, but it also happened at work bc we had a load of grass snakes and a few adders in the cat pens

193: spite

191: heavy metal!! you stick on some Sabaton and I'm happy as a pig in shit

192: home is safety. it's the wag of a dog's tail. it's acceptance unconditionally and it's unconditional support. home can be a friend, it can be a family member, it can be an animal.

78: some weird mix like a chronically tired raven

98: heavy metal, tattoos, reptiles

99: Englishmen, the English crown, Tories

65: LORD OF THE RINGS

62: yes!! I'm vegetarian and have been for... a long while lmfao

60: people who walk their reactive dogs off lead.

59: nope

41: nope, no phobias

39: yes and no; there's some superstitious beliefs that I hold that come from my culture, but I wouldn't say I 100% think they're real

25: Damian Lewis, Tom Hardy, Angela Bassett, Laverne Cox

20: rdr2!!

19: my alarm has been The Last Stand by Sabaton for 2 years now, so I always start my day w that

17: ninjas

6: ALIENS, YOU CANNOT TELL ME THOSE FUCKERS AREN'T REAL, I SAW THE US HEARING AND I CAN TELL YOU EXACTLY HOW ROSWELL'S INCIDENT IS LINKED TO LOS ALAMOS AND WHY. IT'S ALIENS.

until next time!!! (there's no rush!! I'm working on the next chapter as it is, so there's plenty of time lmfao)

[words-writ-in-starlight]

Jame/Tori. 12 and 16. Happy Birthday! Wishing you a year full of understanding medical professionals.

SAME!!!  Anyway, last night I was reading God Stalk out loud to my partners, because we are all very adorable, and I almost paused the chapter to wax adoring about Jame and Tori because Jame made an idle comment about not understanding how someone could decide not to support their brother, no matter what their brother did.  So you get to go first.

12) What first changes when it starts getting serious?

The first thing that Jame notices as a change, a real change, isn’t something anyone else would notice.  Tori kissed her, and didn’t run--kissed her, and held her face between his beautiful scarred hands, and rested their foreheads together like they did when they were children, like she was safety to him again, and that was--that was new, but she didn’t really think of it as a change.  Everyone else sees it as a change, but not Jame.  She thinks that Tori might not see it that way either.  It wasn’t a change, it was a return to the right shape of things.

The first thing she notices as a change isn’t until a few nights later, when she collapses in a chair and falls asleep.  The dream is pleasantly nonsensical at first--a nightmare, but a real nightmare, which is a relief, of dancing in the Res aB’tyrr in front of the randon council, while her feet bleed and her balance slips on the slick tabletop.  She realizes she’s dreaming when she stumbles, but dances on as if a puppet on strings, until finally the dance ends, and she bows, and takes her bloodied feet and her weariness up the stairs to the loft.  

It’s her brother’s study, at the top of the stairs, and he’s there, sitting in the chair by the fire with one leg crossed over his knee and frowning in concentration, and he blinks at her as she stumbles through the mirror and lands clumsily on the floor.  She braces herself to watch horror flicker over his face--sees the moment of instinctive alarm--and then he asks, “What are you wearing?”

“What?” Jame asks, blank, and then says, “Oh.  It’s a dancer’s costume.  What are you doing?”

Tori’s lips twist briefly and he says, “Trying to sleep.”

“Are you hiding in here on purpose?”

He looks uneasy, almost--apologetic.  “I just need some rest.”  And then he hesitates, and then Tori says, “You can stay.  There’s another chair.”

“What?” Jame repeats.

“I can keep us both here for a while, I think,” Tori says.  “You look tired.”

Jame is nodding before she thinks it through, and collapses in the chair across from Tori--the dreamscape can’t manufacture pain or weariness the way the soulscape can, but she is tired.  She hasn’t slept in days, and she’s all too aware that she’s as likely to wander out the door into a disaster as she is into a restful night.  And Tori’s study--the dream he’s made for himself, a shelter from visions and souls--is warm and quiet, with the fire and the old chairs, and with her brother.  It’s--nice.

Tori offers her a faint smile, and takes his foot off his knee and stretches his legs out in front of him, mirroring her, so that their ankles cross in front of the fire.

16) When the zombie apocalypse comes, how do they cope together?

I genuinely do not think they would bat an eye at a zombie apocalypse.  They essentially grew up in one.  Honestly I think they would be THE clutch people to have in charge, because they are very good at this, before Jame and Tori were dancers or fighters or leaders or soldiers or anything, they were dealing with the undead.

The first thing Jame, in northern Tagmeth, does upon seeing the first haunt in the Riverlands is to sit down with a map and every report she can barter, beg, or borrow, and draws out the advancing line.  She gathers her people and gives them exacting instructions, on how to kill the dead, and she sends a letter to Mount Alban that simply says I need help, cousin, meet me at Gothregor, and she sends out scouts for one week.  At the end of the week, she rolls up her maps, tells everyone to pack everything they want to keep, and takes her people south.

She arrives at her brother’s doorstep unannounced, and the Knorth Kendar are getting used to the way their Highborn do things but also they hate the way their Highborn do things.  It’s not really right for their lordan to show up with every single one of her people in tow and demand to see her brother now.  But, then, most of them have served their lord for years now, and they know that hard-eyed silver stare, and no one stops her from storming out to the barracks where Torisen is going over their census with Rowan.

Tori is already looking at the door when Jame opens it, and he says, “Jame,” and Rowan says, “Lordan,” and Jame says, “I have bad news, and I think we’re the first ones to get it, so we need a plan if we’re going to save our people.”

And Jame thinks it says something kind, about her brother, that even at his worst, he cared about their people to the point of desperation.  And he’s not at his worst anymore, and so she’s not surprised when he gestures to the chair at his other side, facing Rowan, and says, “Of course, what happened?”

[vicky-shitposts]

reflections

19th Feb 2021,

last night was crazy. me and zoe finally made up, and when i was telling her about my giant pyramid project in minecraft, she said she's going to move into it with me - girl really likes to keep me on my toes. she also wore a beanie and a flannel and the gay inside me exploded. had to remind myself that i am, in fact, not in love with her. finally got around to watching Name Of The Doctor too, but it was really hard to see it through my crying; totally worth it, and seeing Walter Simeon hold the Doctor's face uh, did something for me. Phoebe was also kind enough to check out all of Inner Mechanism for me and was a total darling about the whole thing. they also "green lit" the project for me, so now it's all systems go to add the final perfecting touches. first proper teaser went on my instagram: "this is my sacrifice, this is my exile". might do the second one later today, "watch this space..."

sipping coffee, painting my nails black and watching interviews. about two hours ago i was lost in tiktok, just scrolling mindlessly with not a single hope or care in the world. it was really nice and felt like a trance. a year ago today, the world was normal and calm and i was in wales. i went to see my best friend at the time, as well as her girlfriend, but the entire fiasco turned into a shambles; in short, i just felt like i wasn't wanted there after completely running myself down and investing my own time and money to get there. i stopped speaking to her a few weeks after as a result, but she came back out of nowhere last month and messaged me for some reason. i haven't got to the bottom of why or what happened, part of me is too scared to hear the truth. i haven't spoken to her in a while. i have an unread message from her, so i think i should drop a line and say "a year ago today i was with you, you were with your ex and the world was stable".

finally read some more of my fucking book at last!! did so while listening to Who Am I? - Pale Waves yet again. enjoyed it a lot more this time around. was speaking to Lyndon a few days back, saying how i often get bored with new albums around halfway through; Who Am I? is only 33 minutes long mind you, which doesn't constitute an album runtime in my "professional" opinion - i've made some money from my music which constitutes me as professional, right?? back to my point at hand. it flowed a lot better this time and it didn't leave me feeling bored by the second half. it flew by and again was a perfect reading soundtrack, thought i did prefer it the last time when it was executed within a moving vehicle. a friend of mine called James also checked out my Underworld single yesterday, said he really liked it and loved the beat, which really meant a lot.

lego set arrived and oh god, is it beautiful. it's so big!! and it comes with a couple other things beside the main rocket itself; it's so cute, so cool and so worth the money!! Iron Lady also came today, so once the night crawls in i'll be sitting down to watch it. who's gunna take bets on if im gunna cry or not?? but lyndon did say if i cry over a Margaret Thatcher film, it makes me a tory - rahhhh that's actually so peak fam :///

i can see why Meryl Streep was highly regarded in The Iron Lady. but while she does play the part extremely well, i couldn't help but feel so upset and distressed by the film. i'm a history student and hear about things in passing, like the cold war and the falklands war; none of which have never been taught to me at school, and therefore i have no clue of any detail concerning them. after seeing this film, i can only assume that thatcher had a huge role to play in the falklands war. to see so much terror, death and bloodshed under the reign of one woman?? this is the past history of the place that i was born and live in, and it disgraces me. this was supposed to be about the life of a woman but with so many explosions, acts of terror, stock footage of people fighting police officers, buildings on fire and people bleeding on the street... what have i come from?? this woman served under the same party as we have here and now, and it made me start to think. what if people retaliated against boris johnson in the same way?? what if his second in command was blown up, or a hotel he stayed at was bombed?? it's scary to think the power that people have, and when they upset the public, how hard they fight back. and if thatcher was the reason for all of those explosions and deaths, then i feel ashamed. i can understand why people despise her and her party. were discussing the idea of "what is history?" in one of our first history lessons last year, and we concluded that it is to record the errors of the past to ensure that we don't make the same mistakes in the present or the future. to learn from our past for a better future. i hope that above all, we have learnt from our past and never experience anything similar. i couldn't handle it in the film, so god only knows how i would take the real thing. but i can tell you here and now - hope is the only thing keeping me going.

i want to conclude today with some quotes that i have recently discovered and fell in love with: "the name you choose is like a promise" - Doctor Who; "i love being called a bastard. it somehow implies that the most heinous thing i have done is exist" - Lord Byron.

[words-writ-in-starlight]

*kicks down your door* YOU'RE REQUESTING ASKS IN FANDOMS AND I'M IN 3/4 OF THEM AND TWO ARE VERY OBSCURE AND I THINK THAT'S VERY CASH MONEY OF YOU. ahem. 1, 2, 3, and 7 for jame, with extra credit if at least one is fluffy?? (look i know me my source material but also let her be happy!! for five seconds!!)

My week got hectic so I am returning to this ask meme mmmmm A LITTLE LATE, and I think that is very on brand.  For this ask meme!

1) Their physical weak spots

Jame has the massive advantage of dwar sleep, so that old injuries don’t often leave weaknesses to be targeted later.  Instead, her greatest physical weakness isn’t a single spot, nothing that she can fix or strengthen or make disappear.  It’s just--Jame is small.  Even for a Highborn, she’s delicately built, bird-boned, and among Kendar she looks like a wide-eyed hungry child.  Taken off-guard, or facing an enemy she isn’t willing to kill, Jame is acutely aware of the way that her stature puts her at an acute disadvantage.  And she knows, she knows, that no matter how much she trains, no matter how much Shanir power she throws into a fight, she’s just always going to be...small.  

Anyone who knows Jame would be shocked to hear that she thinks about this.  She might have to look up at anyone else at Tentir, but if there’s one word they wouldn’t dare ascribe to her--certainly not in her hearing--it would be small.

2) Their emotional/moral weak spots

At the end of the day, Jame is always ready to put her life on the line for what she believes.  Putting her peoples’ lives on the line, or gambling their welfare on her own decisions...not so much.  Sometimes this means she’s careful with them.  Other times, this means she’s so paralyzed by the potential fallout that she doesn’t make any decisions at all, and they all pay the price together.  This isn’t really a headcanon, it’s sort of a major plot engine in Gates of Tagmeth, among others, but I’m still real invested in Jame’s plot being less “gain power, fight evil” and more “make connections and learn to direct power away from collateral damage.”

In terms of strict headcanon, I will die on the hill of Jame’s best-hidden emotional weakness being that she wants a home and family that loves her.  She’ll barely even admit it to herself, how deep that craving runs--if she did, she would be faced with a sudden onslaught of grief that she sort of doubts she’d even survive.  Her departed mother, her mad father, her terrified brother, her near-miss-consort-uncle, her Senethari-uncle, her sadist half-brother...if Jame sits and tallies up everyone who hated her, everyone who abandoned her, everyone who died on her, whether they meant to do it or not, she thinks she might never trust the Kencyrath again.  But she does, every time, because she wants it.  She wants to be at home in Gothregor, the stronghold of her house, she wants warmth and welcome and all the things that go with a family.  The Master almost brought her down twice with that longing.  Jame thinks, sometimes, privately, that she understands the Dreamweaver better than she likes--Tori, coming to her with open arms and a soft smile, could convince her to do many things.

3) Scars or painful spots

Jame knows that it’s not obvious.  She knows that Kencyrs have scars.  She knows that she’ll probably die with far more than a single straight scar, healed by the finest healer on Rathillien.

But she hates the scar on her cheekbone.  It says helpless and prisoner and worthless, and she knows that Kallystine desperately overstepped her bounds by laying hands on her, she saw Torisen repudiate the woman on behalf of both of them, but....  Jame still hates the scar.

7) Their tickle spots

Everyone wants FLUFF, so listen, here is the fluff:

Jame and Tori have identical ticklish spots, under their ribs, behind their knees, and, with a light enough touch, the nape of their necks.  As children, in the dark of the moon as they waited up to see if the world would end, they would prod fingers into sensitive spots to win giggles, and shush each other in hisses and whispers as they scuffled.  They matched, in this as in everything, and that meant an uncanny advantage of being able to see and strike for openings while the other person was moving.