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#all i need malta
arabela25 · 1 year
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Non-qualifiers of semi-final 1
Dance (Our Own Party), The Busker - Malta 🇲🇹
Aijā, Sudden Lights - Latvia 🇱🇻
We Are One, Wild Youth - Ireland 🇮🇪
Tell Me, TuralTuranX - Azerbaijan 🇦🇿
Burning Daylight, Mia Nicolai & Dion Cooper - The Netherlands 🇳🇱
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ihamtmus · 4 months
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madizenmadi · 2 years
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i hate writing for hetalia when i need to use other characters that either barely exist in canon or don't exist at all, so I have to make up names and personalities and looks and everything for them but also i don't want to get information wrong but also i don't wanna research for DAYS for this ONE scene and ahHHHHHHHHH
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First semi will be the more stressful one this time around. Second one will be tamer
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lilhawkens · 6 days
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i know the whole "oh no. my disability! it's disabling me!" is incredibly funny
and i agree, but sometimes it really just hits me like. i have a chronic illness that does disable me and makes me unable to do even the most basic stuff
i hate how dynamic the whole thing is i hate that i have good and bad days and that on good (and sometimes even on bad days) my brain just tries to convince me that i'm making it all up in my head and i hate that on bad days i can't even get out of bed i can't use the stairs i can't make myself food i can't even fucking think
i hate that i'm just expected to figure it out i hate that i'm expected to just go on
i hate that the most normal things will make me flare up and i hate people making jokes about not calling in sick cuz it doesn't count and i hate that i can't just do things anymore
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sprocketsciencer · 9 months
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New year, new transfer season!
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inebubble · 11 months
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I love these characters so much my heart is going to burst
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allineeddd · 2 years
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Order Groceries Online In Malta | All I Need
Groceries are known to be the most useful components of everybody's house potential. When it is the beginning of a month it sure is one of the facts that groceries will have to be delivered and will have to be concerned accordingly. People are more into dealing with the requirements within which one might not be able to highlight the prominence of being the best if not they are catered. 
In a place called malta, then all I need application stood as one of the best in terms of delivering groceries to the doorstep. All I Need super application that is particularly designed in order to orient people with the kind of services that they desire and is known to be the best out of the lot more initiations that are usually happening around the world.
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The finest categories that are highlighted with respect to all I need applications will serve the purpose of choosing the right products that are affected. These products that are categorized according to the particular categories that are picturized will stand as the ability for people to make them understand their needs by not getting confused. 
The source of confusion will not prevail when it comes to all I need application because everything is finally incorporated that serves the purpose of selection. Moving ahead with doorstep delivery the delivery wallets are particularly enthusiastic and are more concerned about delivering the needs of two people at their doorstep.
This is one of the most favorable conceptions that is being oriented with all I need an application where care and concern are the two main components that are highlighted. In this present world, it is a much-needed aspect because the hustle and bustle that is oriented with the work analysis are driving people into things that they are not familiar with. Please conceptions of online delivery of groceries will stand as unique personification where people can rely on the standard and can have their needs delivered.
Install Now:
Visit: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=io.all_i_need
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wileys-russo · 11 months
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off limits (5) II a.putellas x león!reader
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part one part two part three part four
off limits (5) II a.putellas x león!reader
"-so ale just, left?" alba clarified and you nodded. "i mean i thought i knew my sister but it is not like her to run away from a problem." alba winced and you hummed, twirling around the straw in your empty glass.
"i'm sorry amiga. i really did not know that is what happened, i assumed you both had a fight or she just said something stupid. alexia can be so stubborn sometimes but she is not one to just give up." alba sighed, moving her arm around your shoulders.
"thats what i thought too, but she has made it clear now that it meant more to me than it did to her." you shrugged, sighing deeply. "look amiga i don't mean to dismiss your feelings at all and please if i am overstepping, tell me." alba started as you looked at her curiously but nodded for her to continue.
"the way she looked at you as you were leaving, the way i watched her breakdown in that bathroom was unlike i have seen her before. my sister is someone to wear her heart on her sleeve around those she trusts, she is incredibly passionate and loving but she is not one to show weakness to many." alba started, your head falling to her shoulder as you hummed for her to continue.
"ale has never brought a partner home, never been public about a relationship, never spoke very much about anyone she's seen, she is a very private person chica even with me. but i promise you that she cares about you, i know her well enough to see that. but i think she is afraid of how much, so when something threatened that she thought it would be easier to pretend not to care, to protect herself and to protect you." alba continued as you frowned a little at her words.
"how is leaving me when i needed her, protecting me?" you argued, pulling your head back up and turning your body. "you and mapi have always been very very close, like alexia and i si?" you nodded in agreeance.
"we were, but i cannot look at her the same way since everything happened. i blame both of them for how things turned out, in different ways." you admitted, alba nodding that she understood.
"well if alexia did not like a partner i had, i would listen to her about why. because i know she cares about me and she wants me to be happy, so if i was happy and she still did not like my partner, i would want to know why." alba started, holding up a hand as you opened your mouth to interrupt.
"which i know is not the same situation and not to defend alexia because i could slap her for how she has handled this mi amiga. but maybe she did not want to be the cause of any issues with you and mapi, because she knows how special that bond is with your hermana'." alba suggested as you sighed deeply, taking a moment to collect your thoughts.
"then why would she not tell me that so we could have talked about it and worked through it? she just left alba, she left me like i was nothing and nobody to her. and that hurt! she does not understand how much that hurt." you whispered, facade breaking for a moment as you angrily wiped away a loose tear.
"okay hey hey carino we don't have to talk about it anymore. i'm sorry if i overstepped." alba pulled you into a tight hug as you sighed deeply into her shoulder.
"but you know...i would have loved to have you as my sister if you and ale got married." "alba!" "sorry! just trying to lighten the mood amiga."
"are you coming to malta next week then?" alba pulled away, finishing the last mouthful of her drink and nodding for the two of you to leave.
with international break coming and spain not having any fixtures it meant you all had a few days off, so a few of the barcelona girls and their partners had organised to go to malta as a getaway from everything.
"no." you shook your head firmly, having been invited but you knew through the team that alexia was also going. "wrong. you are coming! and you can hang out with me." alba grinned, pinching your cheek as the two of you walked toward her car.
"why are you going? do you have a secret girlfriend on the team you are not telling me about?" you teased her, not missing the way her face changed for just a fleeting moment. "you do! tell me." you demanded, smacking her shoulder.
"i don't, i promise ale invited me and that's it. but there is something you should probably know." alba started, unlocking her car as the two of you slid inside and you gestured eagerly for her to continue. "so when mapi first joined barca and she and alexia started getting very close-" alba started, car engine roaring to life.
"-me and your sister..." alba trailed off giving you a look as your jaw dropped. "you slept with maria?!" you gasped, albas eyes widening.
"mierda no! we went on a few dates, kissed a few times then decided we were better off as friends and that was that, nothing else ever happened." alba dismissed quickly, pulling out of the parking lot as you shook your head in disbelief.
"does alexia know?" "who do you think encouraged it?"
"oh i wish you had not told me that albs. that is so weird!" you groaned, struggling to wrap your head around it. "why is it weird! its not like anything happened, and her and ingrid are the most well suited couple to each other i have ever seen, soul mates." alba shook her head, speeding down the freeway.
"because she's my sister and you're-well you!" you huffed, cringing at the thought. "hey! there is a line of hot women waiting to get a chance with alba putellas thank you." the older girl hit you with her free hand.
"you know chica in another universe you and i..." she trailed off at a red light sending you a wink as you grimaced in mock disgust.
"hey i know you have a thing for putellas women, why not the younger better looking model amiga?" she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively with a toothy grin as you shoved her, both of you knowing it was all light hearted.
if anything you viewed alba as a sister of sorts in the same way you did ingrid, she was always around long before you and alexia got together and given you were barely a year apart in age you'd always been close.
"well i didn't think you had something for the león women alba but here we are." "i am swearing you to secrecy with that nobody else knows about it, you take it to the grave or i put you in an early one!"
~
alexia glanced up with a frown at the insistent buzzing from the security box by her door. quickly standing to make her way over there she rolled her eyes seeing her sister waiting downstairs on the small camera screen, buzzing her apartment number again and again.
she shouldn't have been surprised given that she knew alba had spent the afternoon with you, but still she was slightly taken aback by the way the younger girl forcefully shouldered past her the moment alexia opened the front door to let her in.
"so she told you."
"of course she told me alexia! you-" alba struggled to get her words out as her older sister sat back down on the sofa, nala curling up into her side. "explain, now." was all the girl could get out, pointing at her firmly.
"explain what?" "why you left her alexia." "alba-" "don't alba me. first you hide the relationship from me, then you are dishonest about why you broke up and then accuse me of trying to flirt with her at lunch! explain alexia."
the older putellas sighed, gently moving nala off of her as the small ball of fur curled up in her own bed on the floor, alexia running her hands down her face as she leant forward on her knees and alba took a seat.
"i don't know why. in the moment-in the moment i just heard the way mapi was speaking, the anger and the betrayal in her voice. selfishly my first thought was the team, if mapi was angry at both of us it would affect our overall chemistry on the pitch." alexia started, alba scoffing quietly at her words but remaining otherwise silent.
"so then i panicked and i just....i shut down. i didn't know how to process what i was feeling so i didn't know how to comfort her through what she was feeling. i knew i should have just held her, or hugged her but i was terrified that if i did then mapi would never speak to either of us again, and i couldn't be the cause of that." alexia continued, closing her eyes as guilt again flooded her body in waves.
"then that next morning all i wanted to do was go and see her, to apologise and check on her and try to talk. but i couldn't get the image out of my head of mapi screaming in her face, i have seen them fight before but never ever like that. or the way her voice broke as she begged me not to leave alba. she begged me and i did not even turn around!" alexia whispered, pinching the bridge of her nose and hanging her head in her hands.
"mapi did not deserve a best friend who lied to her, so i iced her out. and she did not deserve a girlfriend who does not stand up for her, does not protect her, who walked away like a coward and did not own up to her mistakes." alexia finished, glancing to look at her younger sister whose features were curled into a frown, though alexia was unable to decipher what she was thinking.
"so you just...left it. did not apologise, did not try to explain yourself. do you know how much she is hurting ale? how confused she is? she thinks you do not care for her, and that you never did." alba spoke quietly and firmly, though not unkindly seeing how much the older girl was clearly struggling.
"of course i care about her!" "well how is she to know that hermana? have you told her?" "no." "exactly. then imagine how much more confused she is when suddenly you try to play hero at the club the other night as if you cared for her after icing her out, after leaving her without an explanation, ignoring what happened and not making any attempts to fix it. you do not get to treat her like that alexia and then be confused as to why she did not allow you to take her home and be her saviour, that is cruel."
"i know." alexia muttered, having spent the time since doing nothing but reflecting on all the things she wished she'd done differently, and plaguing herself deeper and deeper into a self inflicted pity party that the cage she was in was one of her own creation.
"good. because she is coming to malta and you are going to fix things before we go!" alba announced, alexias head shooting up and her eyebrows furrowing. "since when?" alexia questioned, having checked in multiple times with her team mates and friends about the guest list for this little getaway.
"since i told her i would be kicking her door in and kidnapping her if she was not ready when i pick her up to go to the airport." "mierda alba! you had no right to get involved!" "you have no right to be upset if she chooses to go away with her team and her friends, and you are going too. so you have six days to start fixing things with her if you do not want to lose her for good hermana."
~
your plan to avoid alexia was going well, as cruel as it sounded her knee had been giving her some trouble which meant she wasn't training with the group, rather focusing on media duties, physio visits and individual sessions.
there was only one more game until international break and alexia already knew she was not going to be on the roster. she had done her best to make peace with it, as much as it terrified her anytime something felt a little off.
so you continued to avoid any and all interaction with the captain, and in turn you'd also been avoiding your sister, still struggling with how to forgive her after the domino effect of her actions.
but with ingrid in her ear about giving you the space you clearly needed she was doing her best to try and respect that, but it killed her to shoot you a smile across the locker room and see you have to force one back before you'd hurry away.
back when things were normal you'd eat at her house at least twice a week, come over when you were bored, spend weekends curled up on her sofa with bagheera. it used to annoy her sometimes the way you would just show up, sometimes even letting yourself in and eating the food from her fridge like you lived there.
she'd scold you and scowl at you asking if you had suddenly moved in, and you'd simply grin at her like annoying younger siblings do, wandering off to watch a movie on her tv which was bigger than yours, flicking through her extensive novel collection or stealing clothes from her closet when she wasn't looking.
they were right when they say you don't know what you miss until its gone, and mapi would sometimes find herself staring at her front door wishing you would barge in uninvited again.
when you would come to her for advice or just to rant angrily about something that had riled you up that day, even something as simple as your neighbors taking your parking spot meaning you had to park a three minute walk away from your building.
despite your sisterly arguments the two of you had always been close, always told one another everything, especially as you grew up and matured and followed in her footsteps.
some would have been frustrated at their younger sister seemingly copying their every move, but mapi could not bring herself to feel anything but pride when she watched you play and progress through the years, adoring the thought that she had played a heavy hand in your love of football.
but the one thing you'd kept from her, was the one thing that had ruined everything, and mapi truly had no one to blame but herself. she wanted her baby sister back, but as ingrid had explained she needed to let you come to her now, and that the tighter she held on the more you would just pull away.
things shifted one afternoon when you were returning from a meeting with jonatan after your last training session for the week, assuming most of the team and staff had left for the day given it was nearing the early evening.
you were exhausted both physically and mentally, everything had begun to take a toll on you and you were noticing it finally start to affect your football, something you'd tried hard as you could to avoid happening since all of this started in the first place.
but it appeared you weren't the only one who was feeling the effects of everything. your eyes flickered to the right as you passed one of the physios offices, noticing a body sat on the benches which of course you recognized right away.
you paused for just a fleeting moment, and all it took was that milisecond for her eyes to meet yours, red and puffy a clear indicator she'd been crying. uncomfortable with the sudden invasive vulnerability you'd hurried away, though felt something pulling you back as you stopped after a few steps.
your body fell into turmoil and you froze on the spot, head sent into a dizzying back and forth argument about how you should continue. eventually the little voice in the back of your head won out, and ignoring the thoughts creeping in about how bad of an idea this was.
"hola capi." you greeted her quietly, knocking on the door gently as again she looked up, even more startled than before that you'd returned and directly addressed her. "hola." she forced a small smile back as you lingered in the doorway.
"estás bien?" you checked in with a slight raise of your eyebrow, nodding to the ice pack strapped to her knee. "fine, gracias." she spoke through tight lips with a curt nod of your head, taken aback by how this was the most the two of you had spoke in days.
"no you're not alexia." you remanded softly, moving into the room and pulling yourself up to sit on the bench opposite her. a thick silence brewed between the pair of you, the tension almost suffocating as you sat together unmoving.
"i have to go get some scans on my knee tomorrow, maybe an mri. they are worried something has potentially torn, we are hoping for the best and it is just a minor setback and needs some rest, but preparing for the worst just in case." alexia confessed, eyes dropping back down to the floor as you winced at her words.
"you do not need to say anything please, i just needed to tell someone." alexia was quick to clarify before you could speak, unsure what you would have even said as you nodded wordlessly respecting her wishes, the thick silence again growing between the two of you as you contemplated how to leave after her confession.
"for two minutes, can you please pretend you do not hate me?" alexia finally broke, glancing up at you through hooded eyes, hazel orbs shining even more prominently through the thin sheen of tears she'd swallowed back.
"i don't hate you alexia." you forced out after a moment. "i would not blame you. i have been selfish, a coward, treated you worse than you would ever deserve. i would not blame you for hating me, i would hate me." alexia spoke up, glancing toward you as your brows furrowed and you stared at your hands in your lap, thinking of your next words carefully.
"alexia of course i do not hate you. I miss nothing more than just laying with you in silence with just you being there, being with me.” you confessed, voice barely above a whisper as alexia's knuckles turned white from how hard she gripped the edge of the bench she was sat on.
"you miss me?" was all the catalan could manage out, and you felt her eyes bore into you from across the room. "what? of course i miss you alexia. i never even got a chance to speak to you about any of it we just...broke up and i never even got a say in that, it just happened." you managed to get out, emotions starting to bubble over as the control you had over them started to slip away.
"and now all of a sudden I have thousands of pictures of you in my phone that I cannot bring myself to delete, months worth of memories shared with you that i cannot shake from my head. my finger hovers over your contact sometimes just wanting to hear your voice and i think constantly about what you're doing. wondering if you miss me, if you regret what happened and how different things might be if you didn't leave." the control slipped away completely as you started to get off your chest the insecurities that had eaten away at you for weeks now.
"if you called i would have picked up." alexia forced out, eyes locking with yours and her stomach churning at the obvious pain leaking from them as you spoke.
"would you? because the worst part about all of this is that i can't stop overthinking about why you left me and why you never even explained yourself or even tried to apologised. so of course I’m not going to call you and tell you I still love you and I miss-"
"you still love me?" alexia's eyes widened as yours squeezed shut, heart clenching. "i do. but i know now that you don't because if you loved me you wouldn’t have left me like that. you wouldn’t have waited weeks to finally grow a spine and apologise which you still haven't done! you wouldn’t have made up with my sister before making any sort of effort with me knowing that it’s partly her fault we even broke up in the first place!" your temper flared now, jumping down from the bench with your fists balled by your side.
"mi amor please i can't even begin to-" she regretted the word the moment it left her mouth, watching your face fall and your heart shatter all over again causing her stomach to heave.
"don't call me that. please!" your voice cracked and you paused, collecting yourself as alexia fell silent again, face burning red at her mistake.
"the only thing i hate alexia is that I can’t hate you. I can’t get you out of my mind and I can’t escape you even when i'm alone in a room miles away from you. you’re always there with me in the back of my head, or there’s a photo of you on my fridge or on the wall, or there’s a magnet or a keyring or some sort of trinket you bought me that I cannot find the motivation to get rid of but every time I look at them and think of you it just breaks me all over again!" your fist thumped down on the padded material of the medical bench in frustration.
"i am so so sorry, i've wanted to say it but i do not know how to say how sorry i am, for how much i've hurt you and how unfair it was for me to leave you." alexia forced out, arms shaking lightly from the strength in which she squeezed the bench in her hands, a miracle it hadn't broken at her desperate grip.
at her hurried apology a suffocating silence brewed once more, wrapping its hands around your throat as the anger suddenly melted from your body and you could have crumpled to the floor. instead you pulled yourself to once again sit on the medical bench across from your ex lover.
"i never thought that you were capable of hurting me like this alexia. not the girl who held me for days as i sobbed when i withdrew from the national team and would no longer play for my country because of him. who wrote me dozens of love letters and organised for flowers to arrive at my door every week she was away on international duty." you paused for a second to swallow the lump which was building up in your throat as you forced back the hot tears which threatened to fall at any second.
it was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop.
"the girl who I thought was just as much in love with me as I am with her." you broke at that sentence, unable to hold back the dry sob which ripped from your throat, your eyes falling to the floor unable to hold hers anymore.
"the same girl who left me when I needed her. who wouldn’t even hug me or look me in the eyes as I sobbed and begged like an idiota for her to change her mind." your chest heaved with silent cries as you struggled to catch your breath.
"no, alexia don't!" you tried to push her away, not having heard her even get up off the chair as she slotted between your legs and gently cradled your face in her hands.
"please if i could go back and undo it i would but i cannot and i don't know how to apologize enough for that, i cannot ever say i am sorry and sorry will never ever be enough. but i am still that same girl hermosa." you flinched at the term of enderament but alexia had already gone too far to stop.
"i know to have the seat heater on when i pick you up for an early training, i know to always have a spare jacket in my car because you always forget one, i know to order extra food when you say you are not hungry because i know you are. i am still that same girl and i am still so in love with you. but flowers and words will never be enough to fix this, how can i fix this mi amor? please!" the older girl begged, pressing her forehead to yours as you gave up trying to push her away, body wracking with sobs as hot tears carved their way down her own rosy cheeks.
"i am so tired alexia. i am so tired of hurting and wondering and overthinking. i am so tired of walking on eggshells and being angry and upset, it is so draining and i am exhausted." you whispered out, throat raw and aching as your chest heaved and you tried desperately to steady your breathing.
"but i don't know how to fix this ale. i don't know how to go back and pretend like it never happened because it did. i cannot risk hurting myself all over again if i let you back in, i am so sorry ale but i do not trust you anymore, not with my heart or with me." your own hands gently clasped her cheeks, using your thumbs to wipe away the tears which pooled in the corner of her eyes.
once you had you moved to grab her wrists, gently wrenching her hands from your face as they hung limply by her sides, her body sagging in defeat at your words and you ignored the way your mind was screaming at you to take them back and to reach out to comfort her.
"i am exhausted of avoiding you and being angry at you, it is killing me and clearly you have other things you need to be focusing yourself on." you forced out, nodding to her knee as she rested her body against the bench.
"we will never be as we were alexia, and i think we both need some time to make peace with that." you started, knowing that your next words were going to deliver a fatal and final blow.
"my contract is up this year with barca ale, and i will not be renewing it."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
part six
um....i'm sorry? this is not the end though besties do not fret, things aren’t always as they seem, or maybe they are who knows (I do since I’ve half written the next chapter already) xx
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She Had Other Plans
You were a successful leader of a criminal empire. Your girlfriend was a successful tease, especially when you are halfway around the globe.
PT. 2
AN: I hate my mind sometimes. I just stew and stew and can't get an idea outta my head. So here is one of them. And this is my first time using one of those text message thingies, so yeah. And before yall ask, yes. there will be a part 2. 😂
TW: smut, daddy kink, strap-on sex, teasing, mentions of murder, mob!boss reader, uhhh yeah. Think that's it.
Word Count: 3.6K
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In your line of work, you were away from home constantly. You traveled the world, helping to fuel people's darkest and most deceitful habits, for profit. Exploitation, power, and retribution were your specialties. Your heart had grown cold, at least to those on the outside, which was a necessary trait for your survival. You maintained your polished, playgirl public image well, a successful young business magnate, and you dabbled in philanthropy and charity to keep your reputation to the public clean.
Meanwhile, in the underbelly of society, you were ruthless, ensuring your legacy was cemented even if you departed this godforsaken world. You had climbed the ladder of power with precision, leaving a trail of the broken and betrayed beneath you. It was a world where trust was as fleeting as the morning dew, and everyone had a price. Those who worked for you closely would say you were calculating and charismatic, while those on the wrong side of the line knew you as being one step ahead, making your power felt through silence, vengeance, and detachment.
You had single-handedly become the largest mob boss in the United States, and that quickly spread into other countries, building relationships across the globe. Some were built on trust and loyalty, others on fear and mutual benefit.
Business had called you away to Malta, where you had to bury an up-and-coming threat to your growing kingdom and quell any unrest in your distant ranks. It had been a stressful week, albeit a successful one. When the phone call came across that ushered you away to the Mediterranean, you had been in the middle of…other business. Personal business. Having been teasing your girlfriend all day long, you had finally pushed the sexual tension to a head. The brunette had been panting and begging for you, dressed in lingerie that cost more than most people's cars.
When the call came through, you had left her with explicit expectations as to how she would need to handle her sexual fever in your absence. No touching. No teasing. Most importantly, no whining. That was your number one rule. Begging? Yes. Whining. No.
She had tried her damndest to get you to finish what you had started, but you knew this had to be taken care of expeditiously. So, you left a lace-clad goddess in your shared room while you literally left to murder someone. The following night, she began to push your buttons. She knew your limits, and experience taught her just how far she could push you to get a reaction, one that would benefit you both.
Wanda was 'conveniently' caught outside of your NYC penthouse, leaving in a barely-there skirt with a leather jacket and the pair of black Louboutins you had just bought her. The stocking-clad legs that were strutting out of your building, you knew should be wrapped around your waist, while you had her favorite strap buried to the hilt in her drenched pussy, or wrapped around your head as you mercilessly took out your workday frustrations on her.
However, you were 4,000 miles away, watching photos roll across your social media of the 'mystery woman' who had been able to bag you. You knew she was doing this on purpose, trying to flaunt what you walked out on 12 hours ago, leaving her a babbling, flustered, drenched mess.
Your hand tightened around the phone, your jaw clenched so hard it hurt. Your blood boiled with a mix of anger and desire. You had given her an order, but she had chosen to ignore it. The thought of her walking around like that, looking like that, for anyone else to see made you want to rip out the throat of every man on the street. You had been looking forward to coming home to her, to teaching her a lesson she'd never forget. But now, it looked like she had decided to bring the lesson to you.
She flew under the radar for the next two days, and you were thankful. You missed her greatly, and you wanted to show her just how much when you got home. You were willing to let the wardrobe choice from the other night slide, just to have a night of wanton passion in the penthouse, no punishment, no edging, no teasing.
She had other plans.
You were in the middle of a meeting when your phone started to buzz incessantly in your slacks. This was a meeting you had to focus on, but the constant vibration indication yet another text had been sent was slowly chipping away at your resolve to stay sharp for this meeting. You had told her not to contact you during work hours unless it was an emergency. Looking at some of the texts, you knew this was no emergency. No matter how desperate she made herself sound.
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You growled at the phone, knowing she wouldn't respond to any more texts from you. She was playing a game of cat and mouse, and you had a boardroom full of sharks waiting for your undivided attention. You slammed the device down, your eyes narrowing as you turned back to the table. Shutting the phone off, you knew that when it turned back on, you would be greeted with a disaster.
The meeting couldn't end fast enough, you wanted to call her and put her in her place, but the meeting ran long, as you and your new alliance couldn't quite come to an agreement for goods and services rendered.
Finally, after what felt like hours, you had come to an agreement, so you quickly and curtly nodded in everyone's direction, gathering your suit jacket and flinging it over your shoulder as you swiftly made your way down the hall to your waiting car, turning your phone back on as you approached the outside doors.
You climbed into the back of the black Town Car, opening your messages to see some pictures from your girlfriend, taken at obscure angles- her clad in a new lingerie set. You knew it was new, they were a color she hadn't worn before, a navy blue number that stood out against her tanned skin. The photos had been sent with no accompanying text, which was unlike her. Usually, she'd write something teasing, begging for your attention. But these were just…there. They were like silent pleas for your dominance, your authority. You groaned at the images before you, each more provocative than the next.
What made your pulse spike was the Snapchat notification from her. She had just sent you a video. Then there was another. She continued to send you videos until she had reached a total of 11. Knowing these would not just be an ordinary snap, you slipped a headphone into your ear while you opened each video, in the order you received them. The first was her dancing on the pole you installed in the corner of your room, the familiar sound of 'Skin' playing in the background as she worked her hips and taunted you through the phone.
The last video was the final straw. Your most fundamental rule.
She sent you a video of her, sprawled out on the bed, her features were flush, and her chest was heaving. She was still clad in her racy new lingerie, and it was then you noticed it was crotchless. Your mouth went dry at the thought, as her hands made their way up and down her body. Your knuckles turned white as you gripped your phone, the scene before you becoming too much. She buried her fingers knuckle deep in her wet heat, pornographic moans coming through your earbud as you watched her pleasure herself.
You had told her explicitly, no touching herself. You had promised her that when you returned, you would take care of her needs. You had been looking forward to it, to watching her come apart in your arms. But here she was, in your own bed, disobeying you. The betrayal stung, but the sight of her was like a siren's call. You felt a storm of emotions, anger, desire, and something…more. It was a feeling that hadn't surfaced in a long time, something you weren't quite familiar with.
You boarded your jet and tried to calm the storm that was brewing deep within you for the 13-hour flight home. The images of her playing with herself, the thought of her ignoring your command, it was all you could think about. You felt a mix of anger, arousal, and a hint of something else that you hadn't felt in years. She was a challenge, and you hadn't had one a challenge in a very long time.
You tried to distract yourself, completing some work on your phone, trying to read articles about New York politics, but nothing could distract you from the inferno that was building up inside you. Each passing moment brought with it a new wave of desire, the images of her writhing in pleasure burned into your retina. You had to admit, she knew exactly how to push your buttons, and she had just pushed the biggest one of all. You slammed your phone down in frustration, crossing your arms as you peered out the window to the clouds below. After three hours of 'distraction', you finally fell into a restless, lustful slumber.
The flight seemed to drag on forever, but when you landed at JFK, you were more than ready to deal with her. You texted her, telling her to be home, naked, and waiting for you. You didn't care if she had plans or not, she'd learn to prioritize your commands. You had a feeling she was going to be a handful, but that was what you liked about her.
You stalked over towards the waiting convoy of blacked-out vehicles that were waiting to take you home. The sound of your dress shoes echoed through the private lobby to your elevator, as you impatiently waited for the cabled car to come down from the top floor, watching the numbers descend from floor 98 to you, on the third garage floor.
As you stepped into the elevator, you could feel the anticipation building. You were going to show her exactly who was in charge, and what happens when she breaks the cardinal rule. The doors closed with a satisfying 'ping', and you ascended to your penthouse, your mind racing with scenarios of what you would do when you saw her. The elevator doors parted, revealing the sleek, marble floors in your home, the baby grand piano tucked in the corner, and the twinkling New York skyline a backdrop to what carnal acts were about to take place. You turned on your heel, making your way to the furthest room in the house, your bedroom. As you made your way down the corridor to the bedroom, you noticed the doors shut, but a glow came from underneath them.
Your heart rate quickened, your hand hovered over the doorknob, and you took a deep breath before pushing the door open. She lay on the bed, huddled to one side, peacefully sleeping with a book in her hands. She looked innocent, but you knew better. You strode over to the bed, the floorboards giving a slight creak under your weight, but she didn't stir. Carefully, you plucked the book away from her, running your thumb over her nose to wake her up.
"Ragazza monella," you spoke softly, your pent-up frustration leeching into your normally collected voice.
Her eyes snapped open, revealing the deep pools of green that had captivated you from day one. She looked up at you with a lazy smile, not a hint of guilt in her gaze. "You're home," she purred, stretching her limbs like a cat in the sun.
"I see you couldn't wait for me," you said, your voice thick with unspoken accusation as you threw your phone to the side.
Her smile didn't waver. "I've missed you," she replied, her voice a low, seductive purr that sent a shiver down your spine. She sat up, letting the blanket pool around her waist, the hoodie she was wearing you instantly recognized as one of yours.
"I gave you an order, Wanda," you said, your voice low and menacing.
"And I chose to ignore it," she replied, her eyes never leaving yours.
Her audacity was like a drug, and you felt yourself growing more and more crazed at the sight of her. She knew the consequences of her actions, yet she reveled in them. "You know what happens when you don't follow orders," you growled, your hand sliding under the soft fabric of the hoodie to cup her cheek.
Her smile grew wider, and she leaned into your touch. "Do I?" she challenged, her voice a breathy whisper.
With a swift move, you had her pinned down on the bed, the fabric of the hoodie riding up to expose her lingerie-clad body. "You're going to regret this," you warned, your voice dark with desire.
"Am I?" she questioned, her eyes sparkling with mischief.
Your hand trailed down her body, tracing the curve of her waist to the apex of her thighs. "You're already wet for me," you murmured, feeling the dampness between her muscular, toned thighs.
"I'm always wet for you, Papi," she emphasized your pet name, knowing how much you adored her calling you that.
Your eyes narrowed at her insolence, and you felt your ego swell with a mix of anger and desire. "You know the rules," you reminded her, your voice a mix of steel and seduction.
"And you know I love to break them," she whispered, her voice a seductive dance in the quiet room.
You grabbed her wrists, pinning them above her head, your grip firm but not painful. "This is your last warning," you murmured, your eyes dark with lust and promise of punishment.
Her eyes searched yours, looking for any signs of relenting, but she found none. Instead, she felt a thrill run through her body. This was what she had been craving, what she had missed in your absence. The power play, the delicious tension between your dominance and her submission.
"What's it going to be?" she asked, her voice a challenge wrapped in velvet.
Without a word, you yanked the hoodie over her head, leaving her in just the new lingerie set. The room was filled with the sound of fabric tearing as you ripped away the crotchless part of her underwear, exposing her glistening folds to the cool air. She gasped at the sudden exposure, her body arching into yours.
"You're going to learn your place," you said, your voice a low rumble. You leaned down, your mouth capturing hers in a bruising kiss that claimed ownership over her. She moaned into your mouth, her body responding instinctively to your touch, her legs wrapping around your waist as she pulled you closer.
The kiss grew more intense, your tongue invading her mouth, demanding submission. She met your dominance with her own passion, her teeth grazing your bottom lip, drawing a bead of blood. The taste of it made you growl, and you deepened the kiss, your hand sliding down to squeeze her ass.
Finally, you pulled away, breathing heavily. "You're going to get what you asked for," you warned, your eyes dark with lust.
Without another word, you flipped her over onto her stomach, her ass in the air, begging for your attention. You smacked her once, watching as the skin turned pink. She moaned into the pillow, her hips moving back, silently asking for more. You didn't disappoint, your hand coming down again and again, leaving a pattern of red across her skin. Each slap echoed through the room, punctuating the sound of your heavy breaths and her whimpers of pleasure.
You felt your own need growing, and you were glad that you had opted to change into her favorite suit with a strap-on surprise. You knew she was close, her body shaking with each smack, and you couldn't wait to watch her greedy pussy swallow your new toy whole. You slid your hand between her legs, finding her wet and ready. You whispered, "You're going to come for me now," and thrust two fingers inside her, curling them in a way that made her scream into the pillow.
Her orgasm hit her like a tidal wave, her body convulsing around your hand. You didn't stop, though, continuing to fuck her with your fingers until she was begging for mercy. Only when she was trembling did you pull away, standing up to remove your clothes.
When you were naked, you climbed onto the bed, the new dildo standing at attention. "You've had your fun," you said, your voice a low growl. "Now it's my turn." Her eyes widened at the sheer girth of your chosen method of punishment.
"I…I don't think that will fit," she whined, her lust-blown eyes boring straight into yours.
"Oh, it will. You remember your safeword, correct?" you nibbled down her neck as you settled between her legs.
"Yes," she moaned, her back arching against you.
"What is it?"
"Cl…clementine," she stuttered, her body wiggling and writhing beneath you.
You nodded as you slammed into her without preamble, her body accepting you with ease. She screamed your name, her legs tightening around your waist as you began to move. Each thrust was punctuated with a smack to her ass, leaving her skin stinging and her pussy clenching around you. You knew she liked it rough, she was addicted to the pain, but you were going to give her more than she had bargained for tonight.
This was your domain, and she had forgotten her place. You were going to remind her, over and over again, until she was nothing but a quivering mess beneath you. Until she understood that no matter how much she tested you, she would always be yours to command, to punish, to pleasure.
You slammed into her, the sound of your hips slapping against her filling the room. The dildo stretched her to her limits, each inch driving deeper until she was crying out for you to stop. But you didn't. You knew she could take it, knew she craved the pain that came with your passion. The bulge from the tip of the toy poked out her abdomen with every thrust, you pressed down on her stomach where it was appearing, causing her to arch further into your touch.
Her moans grew louder, more desperate, as you picked up the pace. You watched the way her body moved underneath you, the way her breasts bounced with each thrust, and the way her ass cheeks clapped together. You felt yourself getting closer, your strokes becoming more erratic. You reached around, grabbing her chin and forcing her to look at you. "Who do you belong to?" you demanded, your voice a low growl.
"You," she whispered, her eyes glazed over with pleasure.
"Say it louder," you ordered, giving her another smack on the ass.
"I belong to you!" she screamed, her voice hoarse from the moans that had escaped her mouth.
"Beg to cum, amore," you growled in her ear, nibbling down the shell.
"Fuck," she moaned out, her eyes briefly fluttering open before screwing shut again.
"Not until you beg," you reminded her, your voice like a whip crack in the quiet of the room. You could feel your orgasm building, the muscles in your thighs tightening with each powerful thrust. Her cries grew more desperate, her hips moving back to meet yours, pushing herself onto the dildo with a fervor that was almost painful to watch.
"Please," she finally begged, her voice breaking. "I need to come."
You smirked, feeling the power surge through you. "That's all you got, baby?" You taunted, increasing the speed and force of your thrusts. "After all that, the teasing, the videos, this is how you show me you miss me? This is how you show me that you need Papi to make you feel good?" She whined and squirmed beneath you, her body shaking with the effort of holding back her climax. "Beg harder," you whispered, leaning down to bite her earlobe.
Her voice grew more frantic. "Ple…please, Papi," she gasped. "I need to come, I need you to make me come."
"You can do better than that," you grabbed ahold of one of her legs, pulling it over your shoulder as you continued the relentless assault on her swollen, leaking pussy. You leaned down, resting your other hand on her throat, gently applying pressure as you picked up your pace. "I said to beg for it, so fucking beg for it," you whispered, your breath hot against her skin.
Her eyes snapped open, the green orbs locking onto yours, filled with a mix of anger and desperation. "Fuck me harder," she pleaded, her voice strained. "Make me cum, Papi."
The sound of her demanding sent you over the edge, and you slammed into her, the erratic thrusts as you came only spurring her pleasure further. You felt her pussy tighten around the dildo, her walls pulsing as she climaxed hard, her body shaking beneath you. You didn't stop until she was limp, her cries of pleasure turning into breathless gasps.
You continued to work the toy into her, slowly building her back up.
"I didn't give you permission, amore mio," you looked down at her, panting as her chest heaved.
"I know," she panted back, "but I had to make sure you knew how much I missed you."
You couldn't help but smirk at her audacity. She knew how much power she held over you, how much she could push you. "You're going to pay for that," you whispered, your voice a dark promise.
Her eyes lit up, and she bit her bottom lip, egging you on. "Is that a threat or a promise?"
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lukolabrainrot · 25 days
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While everyone is busy freaking out over false narratives, I’m feeling very confident that the following is the actual truth.
- Things went sour for the friend group in Italy, and I’m fairly certain R and A were a big part of that hence N’s posts shortly after. I believe R was involved with paparazzi pics and N shot back with the Camilla bday post. I believe A was being shady and manipulating L and N shot back with the scrabble board.
- L&A have broken up, but he is trying to be protective of her to some degree by keeping up social media likes. There have been several clues alluding to a breakup. The most significant being N posting the songs that allude to their reconnecting and romantic feelings. It is my opinion that L went to N after Italy and they have repaired any conflict that took place this summer.
-L&N have reconciled and are working together to curate the public narrative to boost L by posting and having his team post Polin content and having him actively engage with it.
- JD & N are good friends, but have a strategic plan to play up their public connection to distract attention from L and knock N off the pedestal of public opinion that she is too good for him. JD gets publicity and put on the map. Everything we’ve seen from them (scrabble hang outs, concert pics) has been normal behavior for N and her male friends. People are latching on to it because they want to see N with one man only and at this point any male that is within 10 feet of N is being rumored to be her boyfriend.
- JD is not in Malta. She is there for work, not vacation. This appears to be a sponsored excursion for the cast and crew. Why would she bring JD with her to Malta? That makes 0 sense. That picture is grainy at best and could be literally be any thin, white male with brown hair.
What I do know is people are jumping to conclusions and this is only going to make L&N withdraw even more. We need to trust their connection and everything we’ve seen between them. This narrative that N is upset at L and trying to get back at him by throwing JD in his face is so ridiculous. The bond L&N have is too strong for such petty, public displays of jealousy and resentment. N is too demure, too mindful for all of that.
Tend to agree with a lot of this.
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ayyy-pee · 5 months
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𝔼𝕡𝕚𝕤𝕠𝕕𝕖 𝟘.𝟝 - 𝕋𝕠𝕠 𝕄𝕦𝕔𝕙 𝕥𝕠 𝔻𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕜
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Discord 18+ - Twitter - Next Episode
Pairing: JJK Men x Female Reader
Episode Summary: After a drunken night of binge watching your (least?) favorite show, you find yourself making a grave mistake.
STORY TWIST: READERS WILL VOTE AFTER CERTAIN CHAPTERS TO CHOOSE WHO GETS A ROSE AND MAKES IT TO THE NEXT WEEK. KEEP A LOOKOUT FOR THE VOTING LINK AT THE END OF CHAPTERS
Story Warning: DRAMA, lying and scheming, REVERSE HAREM, profanity bc I can only be me, arguments, fights probably, heartbreak and tears, (more to come)
Artist Credit: momoya348, Umbra3terna, ilameys,maoyaoyao519, _0_0219 Divider Credit: Cafekitsune (Tumblr)
A/N: IT'S FINALLY HEREEEEEE! I hope you guys enjoy this ride (that you're in charge of in later chapters!!!) I'll put up Episode 1 tomorrow after proofreading!!! <3
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“God, this show is so stupid,” you mutter, shoving a handful of popcorn into your mouth while you get settled onto the couch.
“Please…It’s so bad, but I tune in to every season.”
You glance over when your friend reaches into your lap and dips her fingers into your bowl of popcorn and grabs a few kernels.
That was the perfect way to describe what was happening now. You’re currently huddled up on the couch, having spent the day binging the most recent season of The Bachelor until you’re all caught up. The new episode airs tonight and you’re eager to see who Joey ends up picking. Will it be Rachel? She’s gorgeous, funny, and her family seems to really get along with this season’s Bachelor. They have great chemistry. Or maybe it will be Daisy? Though you couldn’t see that working out. The girl is a total bore. Or it could be…what’s her name again? The one who looks a little bit like she could be his sister. Ah, whatever.
You’re not sure when you really began to even give a shit about this mess of a show. It’s corny. No one falls in love within a few weeks of knowing each other. And why does one man or woman need to date twenty people to find someone to marry? Are they that unlikeable in the real world? Not to mention, it’s totally unrealistic. Do these relationships even work out once the cameras cut off? Unlikely. You find the entire premise of the show downright stupid.
And yet, you can’t tear your eyes away as this season’s Bachelor takes each girl out on an extravagant date that…you can’t lie, you would love to be on.
Dancing in Malta? Sunbathing on a yacht off the coast of Spain? Getting to see Niagara Falls up close? Sign you up. You don’t think you would stand a chance being the object of everyone’s affection, but you could definitely milk being a contestant for free trips and good food.
“Why can’t he see that Rachel is the best pick here? Ugh, annoying. You know he’s going to give what’s-her-name the last rose.” Your friend downs her wine in one swig and you don’t bother to hold back the laugh bubbling in your chest. She’s all red faced. You’re not sure if it’s from how passionate she is about the show or from the two empty bottles of merlot she’s managed to down practically on her own, but the glowing hue it gives her highlights the thick scar across her face. A product of her line of work, and said line of work being the reason she’s guzzling wine in the first place.
“Maybe take it easy on the drinks, Utahime.”
She hiccups next to you, slouching in her seat. “I haven’t even had that much to drink!”
“You’ve had most of the wine just on your own!”
“Oh my god, you have one or nine glasses of wine and suddenly you’re wasted,” she mutters sarcastically. “I’m fine.”
You roll your eyes, because you know there’s no going back and forth with her stubborn ass when she starts drinking. 
The living room dims for about three seconds before it lights back up, the show now having gone on commercial break. The rose ceremony is next and despite shit-talking the show only ten minutes ago, you’re eager for the commercials to wrap up so you can see who goes home. It better not be Rachel. You use this brief intermission to go and get some water for yourself but mostly Utahime so she can sober up.
This has been your routine for the last few weeks. Every Monday night, Utahime comes over, peels you out of your bed and forces you on the couch to chug alcohol and watch this ridiculous show. While you find the entire premise of the show nonsensical, you’re grateful for the time it’s given you with Utahime.
You’re fairly new to the Kyoto area and Utahime was the first person you’d met on your first day at your new – how can you put this? – unique job. You see, you and Utahime both work in the field of Jujutsu sorcery. But there’s about where your similarities in the field stop.
Utahime is an active Sorcerer. She’s an instructor raising up the next generation of Sorcerers, building them up so that they can one day join the frontlines to protect the unaware non-Sorcerers of Japan. She’s strong– a grade 1 Sorcerer. Quite impressive. She could easily knock a curse’s head off if she wanted to.
But you? Well, while Utahime is at the top of the ranks of Jujutsu society, you are what some would refer to as a bottomfeeder – an unranked, unimportant, lowly Window. You’re someone who has just enough cursed energy to see a curse. But can you do anything about them? Not unless you want to end up in the nearest trauma center. So if you’re smart, you’ll do your job and whip your phone out to report it so that the real Sorcerers can handle it.
You’ve been in this field for several years now, but working outside of the major cities of Japan. Transferring to Kyoto was your idea of wanting something new and different. Utahime had quickly taken you under her wing. You were certain it was because she took pity on you. A weak, barely gifted Window. But as time went on, you came to realize that that was just Utahime. She was kind and funny, and had a good heart. Well, except when it came to –
“Hey!” Utahime calls from her spot on the couch. You can hear a slur in her words as she speaks and you know she’s opened yet another bottle of wine from who knows where. “Come here! Look at this!” You peer at the television from the doorway of your kitchen and see Utahime has it paused on a very ugly ad. It’s bright white with a background full of red rose petals across the screen. Your eyes roam over the words.
“THE SEARCH IS ON FOR THE ELIGIBLE WOMEN WHO ARE READY TO FIND TRUE LOVE! DO YOU OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW HAVE THE CHARM, STYLE, AND PERSONALITY TO BE OUR NEXT STAR? IF SO, APPLY OR NOMINATE SOMEONE NOW!”
“Will you hurry up? Come look!” Utahime demands, messily pouring more wine into her glass. But it looks like a normal advertisement to you, so you’re not entirely sure what has Utahime’s interest so piqued.
She beckons you again, yelling “Come here!” So you quickly grab a couple bottles of water from your fridge and head back. Utahime is pointing insistently at the screen. “Look. Look really hard.”
You follow the path where her finger points, shuffling closer to the t.v. to get a clearer look. It takes a moment for you to see it, like really see it, but it’s definitely there. Underneath the last line, hidden from the eyes of those unable to see the horrors that you and those like Utahime can, is another message. You fall to your knees, eyes glued to the tiny additional message floating beneath, glowing with cursed energy that reads, “JUJUTSU SorcererS PREFERRED”. 
Confusion slowly takes over your features, the corners of your lips turning down with a frown, a brow arched and skepticism in your eyes. Were you missing something? Was this some sick joke? Were Jujutsu Sorcerers huge fans of The Bachelor or something? You spin around to face your friend who has a look of mischief twinkling in her eyes. You know it all too well, mouth falling open and a finger pointing when you scream “NO” at the exact moment Utahime yells “YOU SHOULD APPLY!”
“Absolutely not!” You must be looking at Utahime like she’s grown two more heads because she looks just as confused as you.
“Why not?! You’d be great on there!”
Maybe she hasn’t grown two more heads. Maybe her brain was swapped while you were in the kitchen because why the hell was she suggesting this?
“Well, for starters, I’m not really looking to date.”
Utahime rolls her eyes, as if that’s just not a good enough excuse. You should just ignore her, snatch the remote from her hand and hit play so you can get back to the show and see who this guy chooses to potentially get engaged to. But for some reason (could be the single drop of wine your friend allowed you to have while she downed the rest), you feel the need to keep listing off reasons to not sign up. “Secondly, I– why would I even want to go on this show?”
Utahime sips her wine, eyes low as she falls into her drunkenness, but you can still see the sparkle of mischief in those brown hues…and it scares you. So you keep talking, chatting away and listing excuse after excuse to your friend, eventually finding yourself back on the couch trying to drive your final point home.
“Besides, they want Sorcerers.” This seems to get Utahime’s attention again, makes her set her glass down as she looks at you.
“I’m sure it’s fine. You are a Sorcerer.”
“I’m a Window.”
“Semantics. You can see curses, can’t you?” Utahime argues.
“...yes.” You shift uncomfortably in your seat. “But I can’t do anything about them.”
It’s not something you should be ashamed of, but there’s just the tiniest bit of you that is ashamed. Because being able to see these monsters and not having the power to do anything about them…well, it feels like a curse in and of itself.
To this, she sighs. “Sorcerers, Windows. They’re just terms used by the higher-ups to keep their stupid, fucked up heirarchy intact.”
You know it’s the wine that’s loosened her tongue. In public, Utahime would not dare to speak so freely. The Jujutsu politics in Kyoto were a lot stricter than they were in Tokyo. Not that that said much anyway. The politics were shit regardless. But Utahime worked closely with those connected to the higher-ups, so outside of this little bubble in your apartment, she kept pretty hush hush about her true feelings.
You watch Utahime closely as she fiddles with her wine glass. She really is beautiful. You think she’d be incredible on a show like this. Which gives you the idea.
“What don’t you apply?”
Utahime leans back, a cackle so loud and abrupt leaving her tiny body.
“No way. I would never date any of these Sorcerers.”
“And you want me to?!” You ask incredulously. You don’t know whether to be offended or not.
Your friend fixes you with a deadpan stare. “You don’t know them the way I do. The only good one out of all of them is Nanami Kento…and Shoko.” She mutters the last name quietly, like it’s a secret that she thinks so highly of her. And maybe it is a secret…the way she feels about the doctor in Tokyo who you couldn’t help but notice has Utahime’s cheeks glowing red whenever she’s mentioned.
“Besides,” Utahime continues. “If I signed up for this and got paired with Gojo –” she shudders at the mere thought of being near the man. “I don’t think I’d be able to keep myself from projectile vomiting just at the prospect of having to kiss him.”
It’s your turn to laugh obnoxiously now, because – “Why the hell would the strongest Sorcerer in a thousand years sign up for this shit? You don’t think he has anything better to do? Like, you know…keep all of Japan safe?”
“Satoru Gojo does whatever Satoru Gojo wants.”
You can’t argue with that. Utahime would know best. She did grow up with him after all. She knew him well. You’ve never met the man, being just a Window, you doubt you ever will. Out of all the Sorcerers, you’ve only ever met Utahime and Principal Gakuganji. You’ve never even met any of the students. You all run in different circles, but that doesn't mean you don’t keep up with the going-ons of the Jujutsu world. Everyone knows Satoru Gojo.
“You should really sign up, though,” Utahime suggests once more. “You might meet a good person. If anything, you’ll get a good vacation out of it.” With that, she stands. It’s clear that the wine is hitting her again, because she wobbles clumsily to the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.
If it’s anything like every other week before this, you’ll be peeling Utahime out of your bathtub because she will have inevitably fallen asleep.
Your eyes fall back on the hidden message on the television, reading it over and over before you finally just hit play and let the finale finish.
Joey chooses whatever that girl’s name is. You’re only halfway paying attention because against your better judgment, you’re actually thinking about applying to this. But you think the show is stupid, right? Why would you waste your time? But what if Utahime is right? What if you do meet someone? It’s not that you’re against dating. You’re just not actively in the market for romance because you’ve found that dating non-Sorcerers is more stress than it’s worth.
The constant obligation you feel to regulate their emotions so you can avoid the creation of a cursed spirit that you’ll have to call in and do paperwork for? Exhausting. Not to mention, if you ever grew to truly love this person, you’d be overwhelmed with guilt if a curse manifested and harmed them in any way and you couldn’t do anything but watch in horror as you made a phone call.
You’d never really given any thought to it, but perhaps dating a Sorcerer is what you needed. You could end up meeting an amazing man!
But also, semantics or not, you were not technically a Sorcerer. You were simply a Window. Why the hell would an actual Sorcerer want to be with you? Better yet, what were the chances of this show even choosing you as their next Bachelorette?
- - - - - -
Apparently, the chances were extremely high, because one phone call, four video interviews, a nearly five hour drive from Kyoto to Tokyo, and days of promotional video and photo shoots later, you find yourself standing outside of the Bachelor Mansion, donning the most expensive gown that money could buy.
This is not what you expected. Not at all. There is so much going on. You want to run and hide from every single camera you see being propped up. You want to curl into yourself when the lights come on and the director calls, “Action!” And you see some man you’re just meeting for the first time approaching as he speaks directly to the camera.
“...and she’ll be making history tonight as The Bachelorette’s first Jujutsu Sorcerer,” you hear him tell the camera as he stops just a few feet short of you. Tall, blonde and handsome. He looks like an American football player. “I’m Jesse Palmer, ladies and gentleman. Now, let’s meet our Bachelorette!”
He turns to you, wearing a bright smile. The cameras follow, moving closer to catch a close-up of your face, so you smile as naturally as you can and try not to flinch when Jesse moves forward to embrace you in a swift hug.
Jesse calls your name as though you’ve been friends for a long time. “So nice to finally see you. You look great.”
The camera pans down your body and back up to your face. “Likewise, Jesse.”
“How’re you feeling?” he asks.
“I’m nervous! Definitely nervous, but feeling good! I’m so excited for this,” you lie. You’re dreading this process. But it’s too late to back out now. So you just hold your smile, conversing politely as Jesse makes small talk and gets to know you before the first contestant pulls up.
And you hope that if Utahime is watching, she sees the message behind your eyes screaming that you’re absolutely going to kill her.
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1968 [Chapter 3: Hermes, God Of Thieves]
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Series Summary: Aemond is embroiled in a fierce battle to secure the Democratic Party nomination and defeat his archnemesis, Richard Nixon, in the presidential election. You are his wife of two years and wholeheartedly indoctrinated into the Targaryen political dynasty. But you have an archnemesis of your own: Aemond’s chronically delinquent brother Aegon.
Series Warnings: Language, sexual content (18+ readers only), violence, bodily injury, character deaths, New Jersey, age-gap relationships, drinking, smoking, drugs, pregnancy and childbirth, kids with weird Greek names, historical topics including war and discrimination, math.
Word Count: 4.5k
Tagging: @arcielee @huramuna @glasscandlegrenades @gemmagirlss1 @humanpurposes @mariahossain @marvelescvpe @darkenchantress @aemondssapphirebussy @haslysl @bearwithegg @beautifulsweetschaos @travelingmypassion @althea-tavalas @chucklefak @serving-targaryen-realness @chaoticallywriting @moonfllowerr @rafeism @burningcoffeetimetravel-fics @herfantasyworldd @mangosmootji @sunnysideaeggs
💜 All of my writing can be found HERE! 💜
They say it’s the most dangerous job in Vietnam. That’s why I wanted to do it.
Chinooks transport men and equipment, Cobras are gunships, Jolly Green Giants are used in search-and-rescue missions. But the Loach—Light Observation Helicopter—is a scout. We have to fly low enough to spot fresh footprints in mud, glints of sunlit metal, blooms of firelight from smoldering cigarettes in the primordial maze of the jungle. And when you go looking for the enemy, sometimes that’s exactly who you find. U.S. Army regulations decree that each Loach must be inspected after 300 hours of flight time, but they rarely make it that long. I’ve been shot down twice already. You roll out of the wreckage, grab your buddies, and book it out of the area before the Vietcong kill you, or worse: drag you back to the Hanoi Hilton so you can die slow.
Currently we’re just north of Pleiku, coasting close enough to the treetops that I could reach out and touch them. I’m in the back seat with my M16, no door between me and the outside world, my hair tied back with a green bandana, the wind hot and sticky. It’s so fucking humid here. Why can’t the communists be trying to take over Malta or Sweden or Monterey Bay, California?
It was the old men who suggested I might be of greatest service to the family by enlisting. I was 25, newly graduated from Columbia Law—a family tradition—and dreading the desk job that awaited me at the Department of Justice. Some people are born to type their lives away in some leather-upholstered office with a view of Pennsylvania Avenue, but not me, and I know this like I know the sun or the stars, ancient truths that can never be changed. And so when Otto and Viserys sat me down—my father had only had one stroke by that point, and was still relatively involved in the day-to-day minutia of putting a Targaryen in the White House—and said Aemond having a brother in Vietnam would make him more relatable, more sympathetic, more noble, not an observer to the carnage of the war but a fellow victim of it…I told them I’d go.
Everyone needs a project. If you don’t have something to distract you from the futility of human existence, it’ll break you in half. I have the Loach. Otto and Viserys, both immigrants ineligible to serve as president of the United States, have their shared ambition of getting their bloodlines in the Oval Office. Aemond has his legacy. My mother has her children, and Criston has my mother. Helaena has her gardens, her bugs, quiet gentle things that she tends with her own thorn-pricked hands. Aegon doesn’t have a project, he never really has, and it’s driven him to the cliff’s edge of insanity. See what I mean?
Anyway, let me tell you something about Vietnam. The Army gives us all the steak, beer, and cigarettes we can handle, but I’d kill for a lemon-lime Mr. Misty—
“Daeron, get down!” the guy to my left screams over the noise of the rotors. His name is Richie Swindell, and he’s from Omaha, Nebraska, and now he’s plummeting out of the helicopter as bullets riddle his chest. I duck low and cover my head as we spiral sideways into the trees, snapping branches, shredding leaves like confetti. I can hear the pilot yelling something, but I can’t tell what. When we hit the earth, the lightweight aluminum skin of the Loach does exactly what it’s supposed to, crumpling to absorb the shock of the collision and reduce trauma to us mortals inside. I scramble out of the rubble on my hands and knees and go to check on the pilot, but it’s too late. He’s already being hauled out by the Vietcong and gets a bullet to the brain. I reach back into the ruins of the Loach to grab my M16, but there are hands around my ankles yanking me out. And now I’m next, and there’s nowhere left to run, and I’m hoping Criston will be there to hold my mother when she gets the Western Union telegram.
One of the soldiers shouts and stops the others, shoving them aside to get a better look at me. With the barrel of his AK-47, supplied by either China or the Russians, he prods at the patch displaying my last name: Targaryen. His compatriots don’t seem impressed. Again, he batters my nametag, speaking to them in Vietnamese.
He knows who I am, I realize. He knows Aemond is running for president.
Now there is a hell of a lot of excitement. The men are talking rapidly amongst themselves, marveling at me, poking and examining me. Then two of them grab me by the arms. I look to the soldier who knows English, at least enough of it to read those nine fated letters. He smiles at me, not like a friend. Like a wolf baring its teeth.
He says: “It is okay, Targaryen boy. We just have some questions for you.”
Guess I’ll be checking into the Hanoi Hilton after all.
~~~~~~~~~~
You wake up to Aegon strumming an acoustic guitar and singing Johnny Cash. The guitar must be new. The one he left at Asteria is plain maple wood and covered in stickers; this unfamiliar instrument is a vivid, Caribbean blue and has Gibson written across the headstock.
“I hear the train a-comin’, it’s rolling ‘round the bend
And I ain’t seen the sunshine since I don’t know when
I’m stuck in Folsom Prison, and time keeps draggin’ on…”
“Let me die. I’m ready to go.”
Aegon laughs, setting his new guitar aside.
“Is Ari okay?”
“Yeah, he’s doing great. And I got the stuff you asked for.”
Sure enough, there are three roomy sundresses hanging from the coatrack—you wanted to have options in case you had trouble finding one that fit correctly, though you gave Aegon a general neighborhood for sizes—as well as an array of cosmetics on the nightstand, including a bottle of shimmering champagne-colored nail polish. “I’m really impressed. You barely forgot anything. Though I will look odd with blush but no foundation.”
“Ohhhhh. Fuck.”
“And this isn’t human shampoo. It’s for dogs. That’s why it has a mastiff on the label.”
“I thought it looked like you,” Aegon says, smirking mischievously.
“Well, thanks for trying.”
“And I found this at the gift shop.” He tosses a card at you like a frisbee. You open the envelope to see a cartoon cow on the front, black and white and wearing a huge copper bell and a party hat. Inside is printed: May your graduation be legenDAIRY! Aegon has crossed it out and written instead I thought this was blank…congrats on the new calf! followed by his illegible scribble of a signature.
“A cow,” you say, smiling despite yourself. “Because I’m Io.”
“You’ve got about a million of those pouring in from all over the country. Congratulations cards, get well soon cards, we really hope your husband gets elected so we aren’t consumed by nuclear Armageddon cards. And then Richard Nixon sent a pipe bomb.”
You set Aegon’s card on your nightstand, half-open so it will stay standing upright. Then you drink the apple juice from the tray the nurses left for you. “Aemond’s not here yet?”
“Uh, no, not yet,” Aegon says vaguely, kicking his feet up on the ottoman. He’s been shopping for himself too. He’s wearing a denim jacket over a black The Kinks t-shirt, ripped jeans, moccasins. He uses the remote to turn on the television: The Dating Game. “So, what did you study in college? You went to Manhattanville, right?”
You chuckle, shaking your head. “You really don’t listen when I talk, do you?”
“I try not to.”
“Yes, I went to Manhattanville. And I studied math.”
“No way. You didn’t major in math.”
“Women can’t do math?” you tease. “That’s sexist.”
“I didn’t say women can’t do math. I’m saying there’s no way your parents sent you to a housewife factory like Manhattanville College of the Sacred Heart to get a math degree.”
“They didn’t, which is why my bachelor’s is in math education. So half-math, half-kid stuff. Makes it a little more…domestic.”
“Cool. Teach me math.”
“What, really?”
“Yeah. Really.” He digs around in the pockets of his jeans until he finds a receipt, then locates a pen in the nightstand drawer. He hands both to you and then stands so he can watch over your shoulder as you work. You can smell him: cigarette smoke, rum, the cool grey rain that is falling outside. It drips off his hair, carelessly slicked back from his face.
“What’s something you don’t know how to do?” you ask, expecting to get an answer like exponents or calculating the volume of a pyramid.
“Uh. Long division.”
You raise your eyebrows. “Going all the way back to 4th grade. Alright then.” You begin writing. “So let’s take a large number—this year, 1968—and divide it by…hm…how many kids you have. So five.”
Aegon whistles. “Five kids. Goddamn.”
“Yes, and you probably couldn’t name them, but there are indeed five. Trust me, I’ve counted.”
“Okay, this is the part I don’t get. Five goes into 19 almost four times. But there’s no way to say almost four.”
“There certainly is not. Five goes into 19 three times, so we put a three up top and then subtract 15 from 19. We get four, drop down the six from 1968, and now we’re dividing 46 by five.”
“Nine.”
“Right. Five times nine is 45. So the nine goes up top and we subtract 45 from 46.”
“45 is basically 46. Let’s call it a day. Close enough.”
“No,” you insist. “We get one, then drop down the eight from 1968, which makes 18.”
“And five goes into 18 three times.”
“Where’s the three go?”
“Up top,” Aegon says, observing fixedly.
“And then we subtract…”
“15 from 18, which is three. So the answer is 393.3.”
“Wrong. Loser.”
“What! How am I wrong?!”
“You don’t just put the three after the decimal,” you say. “You drop down a zero—”
“A zero?! Where the fuck did a zero come from?”
“From the fact that 1968 is a whole number, so it’s actually 1968.0.”
“Oh.” Aegon blinks a few times. “Gotcha.”
“Add the zero after the three to get 30—”
“And 30 divided by five is six. So the answer is 393.6.”
“I am so proud. You are officially as smart as an average nine-year-old.”
He takes the receipt from you and studies it. “This was super enlightening.”
“You want to try calculus now?”
He cackles and sinks back into his plush salmon pink armchair, his miniature dominion in your hospital room kingdom. “You like teaching?”
“I love it,” you admit. “I had to do a semester of student teaching the spring before I graduated, and at first I was kind of petrified. But the kids are so hilarious and interesting and full of excitement about everything, and they’re sweet in totally unexpected ways. They’d chatter all through a lesson and make me want to jump out a five-story window, and then bring me some of their Easter candy. That’s when I realized they weren’t trying to torture me. They’re just kids.”
Aegon is meditative. “Yeah, kids are fun.”
“I wasn’t aware you had much interest in them.”
“No, I do.” And something about the way he says it makes you feel bad for taking the shot. He runs his fingers through his hair, perhaps debating how much he wants to share. “You know Viserys made us all do these little missions after college so we could learn about the real world, right?”
“Right.” Daeron spent his on lobster boats up in Maine, Helaena learned horticulture in France, Aemond helped register voters in Mississippi and Alabama. You can’t recall ever hearing about Aegon’s.
“I got sent to Yuma, Arizona to teach on the reservation there. When I stepped off the bus, I thought it was hell on earth. And then when my time was up I didn’t want to leave.”
“What did you teach?” And then you add: “Hopefully not math.”
“No, definitely not math,” he says, smiling but distant, remembering. “English. Books, poems, all that. But my favorite thing to do was take a song and break it down line by line, really get them curious about what the author was thinking. And then of course we’d all sing it together. I’d play guitar, they’d run around jumping on the furniture, it was a good time.”
“But you couldn’t stay.”
“No,” he sighs. “I had to come back here so I could get dragged kicking and screaming through law school and then married off.”
“And elected mayor of Trenton,” you say, trying to make him laugh. It works.
“Oh God, we are not talking about that. Most miserable two years of my life.”
“So far.”
“Yeah. If Aemond wins and makes me the attorney general, that might be worse.”
“Knock knock!” comes a cheerful trill from the doorway, and then Alicent and Mimi rush in. They descend upon your hospital bed, cooing and soothing, squeezing your hands and trying to smooth your untamed hair.
“What did it feel like?” Mimi is morbidly fascinated, swaying a little, eyes bleary with gin. “When they were digging around in there?”
“Well, obviously she was sedated, hon,” Aegon says, a bit impatiently. He and Mimi share a nod in greeting, no warmth, no depth. You wonder what it must be like for someone you spent so much time tangled up with to become a stranger.
“Oh, darling, I barely recognize you!” Alicent says. “You poor thing, you must be in such awful pain. I’ve never seen you like this before. Your face, your hair…”
Aegon gives her a quick, disapproving look and then lights a cigarette of the traditional variety. He puffs on it as he gazes at the window, like he’s counting the raindrops on the glass.
“I’m feeling a lot better now,” you assure Alicent.
Her eyes flick down to your belly, still swollen beneath your blankets. “Will it scar terribly, do you think?”
You shrug; you haven’t thought much about that part yet. “It’s a battle scar. Aemond gets them in the real world, I get them in here. Same war, different arenas.” You peek out into the hallway. “Is Aemond…is he with you…?”
“He wanted to be,” Alicent says, like it’s a consolation. “But, Washington, you know…the primary there is so close. So, so close. He kept saying that he and Humphrey were neck and neck, and they still are, I believe. Every vote counts, and he’s campaigning all over the Puget Sound.”
“He’s still in Washington?” Your voice is flat with disbelief, with disapproval.
“He wishes he could be here with you and the baby,” Alicent insists, stroking your hair. “I’m sure he’ll fly back as soon as he’s able. But he’s thinking of you so, so much. That’s why he let me and Mimi leave this morning.”
“Right,” you reply numbly. And then you remember what you’re supposed to say. “The election is important. It affects everyone, our son included. For the greater good, personal sacrifices are necessary.”
“We saw him,” Alicent tells you, radiant with joy. “Aristos Apollo.”
“So precious,” Mimi says. “But so small! And trapped in that hideous machine! We could only see him through those little round windows.”
Aegon casts her a violent glare. You are alarmed. “He’s not in an incubator?”
“They have him in a…what was it called, Mimi?” Alicent asks. Mimi has nothing useful to contribute. “A hyperbaric chamber, I think. To help him get more oxygen.”
“But he’s fine,” Aegon says firmly, giving his wife and mother a warning. “Didn’t the doctor say it was a precaution?”
“He did, he did,” Alicent promises you. “Yes, just a precaution, that’s what we were told. The doctor has been trying to reach Aemond, apparently, but since he landed in Washington, he’s never in one place for long…”
“We should buy gifts for the baby,” Mimi says excitedly. “Adorable hats and shirts and trousers. Although even the tiniest clothes might be too big for him right now.”
“Yes, gifts! We must shop for gifts. Oh, it’s all been such a whirlwind. We hurried off the plane to come straight here, love,” Alicent tells you. “Can Mimi and I get you something for dinner?”
“Sure, sure.” You are distracted, still thinking of Ari. “Anything is fine. Wherever you end up.”
“Would you like me to bring a priest to pray with you? Saint Nicholas Church is right around the corner.”
You smile. “That’s very kind, but I think I’d prefer some books.”
“Baby clothes, dinner, and books. We can do that. Can’t we, Mimi?”
“We absolutely can,” Mimi agrees with tipsy, girlish enthusiasm.
As an afterthought, Alicent says: “Aegon, have you been here all this time? You must be exhausted. We’re going to book a suite at the Plaza, there will be plenty of room for you too. We can drop you off there on our way to go shopping, if you’d like.”
“I’ll stay,” he says softly, watching the rain again.
Alicent’s brow furrows; her dark doe-like eyes are puzzled. “Alright, dear.” Then she and Mimi disappear into the hall.
“Is he really okay?” you ask Aegon when they’re gone.
“Yes. That’s exactly what the doctor told me, just a precaution. I wouldn’t lie to you.”
“Aegon,” you say, and don’t continue until he meets your eyes. “Why are you still here?”
He lights a fresh cigarette. “I don’t think you should be alone.”
“I’m not alone anymore. Alicent visits me, Mimi visits me.”
“Yeah, but you feel like you have to put on a show for them. Play the perfect Targaryen wife with all that stoic, dignified, unshakable faith. You hate me, so there isn’t as much pressure.”
“I don’t hate you, Aegon.”
“Yes you do. You always have. You don’t have to be polite about it.”
“Well…I have valid reasons to hate you.”
He smiles, exhaling smoke. “Right.”
“And you hate me too.”
Now he shrugs, avoiding your gaze. “Everybody worships you, everybody thinks I’m a waste of chromosomes, is it really that hard to psychoanalyze?”
“No one worships me. They worship Aemond.”
“But you’re a package deal. Jack and Jackie, Franklin and Eleanor.”
You trace the lines in your palm with a fingertip, not knowing what to say. You’re so close to Aemond, so inseparable, and yet so vastly far. “Will you wheel me downstairs to see Ari after dinner?” It’s best to go at night when there are less staff around to try to stop you.
“Sure. You want a Mr. Misty?”
“Yeah. Lemon-lime.” That’s what he brought you last time, and it wasn’t bad for a cardboard cup of florescent green sugar water.
“Got it,” Aegon says, and leaves you alone.
You look at the phone on your nightstand. You’ve tried to call Aemond to no avail, though you spoke to Criston twice; on both occasions he said Aemond was in the middle of an interview. It’s understandable that you would have difficulty getting ahold of your husband while he’s off campaigning, leaping from town to town like an electric current. There’s nothing unusual about it at all. But Aemond could call you anytime he likes. You haven’t moved; he knows exactly where you are.
You keep staring at the phone. It doesn’t ring.
~~~~~~~~~~
It’s night again, and you swim up from morphine-soft dreams into your hospital room, dark except for the flashing color of the television, low volume, NBC news. Aegon is curled up in the chair he’s claimed, snoring and half-covered with a cheap, pale blue hospital blanket. And it’s a strange feeling—a foreign language, a new religion—to realize that you’re relieved to see he’s still here, that there’s a comfort in it, a safety.
Suddenly, Aemond is on the television screen. You sit up in bed as gingerly as you can, leaning in, listening close. He’s rarely looked better: blue suit, prosthetic eye, rested and measured and sharp. He’s giving a speech at the Hotel Sorrento in Seattle, three hours behind the time you’re living in on the East Coast. Flanking him on the stage are Criston, Otto, Helaena, Fosco, the eight charming children. Five-year-old Cosmo keeps waving at the camera.
“Right now, my wife and newborn son are at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York City,” Aemond says, beaming, and the audience whistles and cheers. You should smile, but you can’t. He’s not supposed to be there. He’s supposed to be on his way home. “But tonight I’m here with all of you, fighting with everything I’m made of to win the great state of Washington. And I won’t leave until the job is done, because I know the greatest act of devotion that any of us can show our children is to ensure they grow up in a better America than the one we find ourselves in today…”
You look over at Aegon and see that his glassy eyes are open, watching the television just like you are. You don’t know how long he’s been awake. The two of you exchange a glance, and there is a silent, shared recognition of what won’t be said. You can’t criticize your husband. Aegon isn’t going to kick you while you’re down. You are grateful for this. It is a conviction he has only recently acquired.
Aegon pulls his blanket up to his chin and rolls over, turning away from you. You close your eyes and dream of being a child back in Tarpon Springs, mesmerized as you watch Greek sponge divers emerge from the bubbling depths in their suits of rubber armor.
~~~~~~~~~~
It’s the afternoon of the 13th. The Washington State Democratic Convention is being held tonight, and so win or lose Aemond will be walking into Mount Sinai Hospital tomorrow. He has to, he doesn’t have a choice. He’ll have no excuse to be anywhere else, and journalists will be swarming at the entranceway like bull sharks in the Gulf of Mexico.
It’s raining again. You’re reading one of the books that Alicent brought you, Dr. Spock’s Baby and Child Care. You had been meaning to get a copy before you were consumed by Aemond’s campaign and then his near-assassination, his maiming, his fleeting brush with oblivion. Aegon is cross-legged in the salmon pink armchair and plucking lazily at his guitar, singing so low no one outside the room would be able to hear him. It’s a Rolling Stones song, slow and mournful.
“You don’t know what’s going on
You’ve been away for far too long
You can’t come back and think you are still mine.”
As you flip a page and raindrops patter gently against the window, you find yourself thinking how easy this is, your hair undone and your feet bare, no photos to take or lines to remember, no practiced smiles, no overwrought itineraries, only compassion that is quiet and small and real.
“Well, baby, baby, baby, you’re out of time
I said, baby, baby, baby, you’re out of time…”
Aegon abruptly stops playing, cutting off with a twang. You look up at him. He’s gazing back with eyes that are filling up his face, glistening with horror. You turn to find out what he’s seen. There’s a doctor standing in the doorway, but he’s not alone. There’s a Greek Orthodox priest with him.
“Mrs. Targaryen,” the doctor begins, then glances to the priest. The holy man—black robes, gold chains, clasping a komboskini like the one Aemond keeps in a box on his writing desk at Asteria, stained with his own blood—gives an encouraging nod. “We’ve tried to reach your husband. We’ve called his hotel in Tacoma several times, but the senator must be out campaigning, and…” Again, he looks to the priest. Aegon is setting his guitar on the floor, covering his mouth with his hands.
Ari. Too early, too fragile, too defenseless in a world full of wolves.
Your words come out in a whisper. “He’s gone, isn’t he?”
“We must remember, child,” the priest tells you, vague patronizing pity. “That the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away, but what is lost to us in this life is never truly gone. Those we love wait for us on the other side in paradise—”
“Please leave. I don’t want to talk to a priest. I don’t want to talk to anyone.”
I just gave birth to him. I just started to believe he was mine.
The doctor begins: “Ma’am, I’m so sorry to have to deliver this news—”
“I don’t want to talk to anyone, I want to be alone. So please leave,” you beg, your voice breaking. “I want to be alone. Please leave me alone.”
The doctor looks to Aegon. A man’s permission is sought. “Go,” Aegon manages, raspy and strangled, and the doctor obeys.
“God bless you and your husband, Mrs. Targaryen,” the priest says as he departs with a swift bow. You can’t reply. You’re biting back sobs as the tears begin to slither down your cheeks, scalding and furious, not just grief but the bottomless rage of Nemesis.
Aegon is watching you, not knowing what to do, not knowing what you need.
Aemond would want you to be stoic. Aemond would want you to have faith, forbearance, grace. “It is God’s will.”
“Hey.” Aegon reaches across the space between you, grabs your hand, holds it so tightly your bones ache. Still, you wouldn’t want him to let go. “You’re allowed to be fucked up about this. I am too.”
When your eyes drift to him, they are glaring and heartsick and poisonous. “Where’s Aemond?” Why isn’t he here?
Aegon sighs deeply and picks up the phone with his free hand. He spins the rotary dial with his index finger and then holds the handset to his ear. He waits as it rings. “Pantages Theater, Tacoma, Washington,” he tells the operator. A minute or more crawls by. “I need to speak to Senator Targaryen immediately. Yes, I know there’s a convention underway there, that’s why I’m calling you. Go get him.” More minutes, eternal, terrible beyond description. “What do you mean you can’t find him?!” Aegon snaps. “Okay, give me someone else. Anyone travelling with him. Criston Cole, Fosco Viviani, Otto Hightower, Helaena Targaryen. Hurry up. Let’s go.”
Outside the rain grows heavy and loud; it falls in sheets against the misty windows. In the distance, thunder growls.
“Hi, Criston, it’s me. He needs to come home now. Right now.”
Aegon closes his eyes. Criston must be arguing with him.
“No, you don’t understand,” Aegon says, forcing the words to leave his lips and ride the wires to the West Coast, to where the sun sets, to where the future is dawning. He’s still holding your hand. “Aemond doesn’t have a son anymore.”
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fiamat12 · 13 days
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RE: THE ADJACENTS PART 2
The only one I can relate to from a public perspective is JD because he seems to be minding his own business trying to work, promote his projects & be a good friend to Nic. Oh, and T & C seem to mind their own biz, too.
But let's take them one by one:
1- JD- imo, is queer and I'm not "calling him out" as he doesn't hide it at all. The man he was allegedly dating is still around in a pic w/ JD as recently as Aug 9 (maybe more recently, it's just last one I saw). Sure, there's always a chance JD is bi or pan, went through a break up, and is now dating N... however, both N & JD liked the alleged bf's most recent post on June 29. I suppose they could be one, big happy family, OR the boys are queer and Nicola is their friend, which explains the lack of romantic body language w/ JD & lack of regard for him w/ how she acted toward L on the WT (Note: L acted the same way toward N w/ A around so that should signal what was happening there, too). Still, JD def could've accompanied N to Malta as a friend or to detract from L being around.
2) A- I believe she & L have disentangled or are close to it. I think she became a huge liability at some point, esp. after Luke friendzoned her, which I think was long ago (prob after the 1st LA trip). I think he's had to manage her ever since, to keep rumors of him & Nic from surfacing & anything else untoward she may be privvy to from his HBS days. I also think L is a kind person hasn't who hasn't wanted to hurt A. Upon further reflection of MD's post w/ the song "Never Be Like You", I believe the mistake L made was ever getting involved w/ A in the 1st place. BUT I think N is aware & has been waiting for it to resolve in a way that won't crush their reputations. I don't subscribe to the theory that L needs to grow up, decide what he wants, deal w/ his glow up, or a litany of other things that get projected onto L. Imo, N was the hold up & skeptic, and if L had his way, they would've never parted.
3) R- I think R turned out not to be the friend L thought he was. I think they were a support for each other last summer when they were both spiraling from break ups - R from a failed engagement, and L from N [yes N not J; this could be a whole other post but I believe L's hold up marrying J had to do w/ his feelings for N. I think L wanted to be w/ N post filming & N put on the brakes. I also suspect that N was busier than L, which made L insecure after being w/ her nonstop for 8 mos. So, he may have had some flirtations (EB, etc.) that made N feel insecure, & that resulted in them taking the break that the intimacy coordinator suggested]. But back to R...I think when L's star skyrocketed, R wasn't ready to grow w/ him and ended up regressing into childish antics. I think L is learning the hard way that he'll have to be more cautious, even with friends, as his fame increases. You get an NDA, You get an NDA, You get an NDA (!!!)
4) S -I believe she & R may have broken up. I think she initially had stars in her eyes, just like A. Both of them have stated they have dreams of being on the West End. So, I think they thought attaching themselves to older actors w/ connections would get them somewhere. I do believe S also had feelings for R until she found out that he seems to be very self focused rn and has nothing to give to S to support her dreams or growth (thus, the break up coach she followed dealing in one sided relationships). I also think an inappropriate flirtation ensued btwn R & A that led to some hurt feelings. Oddly enough, S seems to gravitate more toward L, prob because he's more caring & empathetic. She's also had to learn the hard way.
5) T & C- I have nothing bad to say about them. They seem like a solid couple on the fringe of it all. T's been respectful in how he's photographed L and C seems to be a supportive friend who has her own career and extended family with whom she seems close. She follows N and likes her posts, so she's prob a dl one of us 😉 🚢
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thatsmzbitchtoyou · 2 months
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Run, pretty girl, run Chapter 3
Summary:  Even with the safeguards put in place after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D., the remaining Avengers find themselves on the run after the American government falls into disarray.  The code word is sent, and they’re officially fugitives.  Bucky makes a run for the safe house set up for emergencies like this where the Avengers are told to meet up, but on the way saves the pregnant agent turned payroll specialist that he was partnered with.  Will they make it before she goes into labor?  Or at all?
Warnings: violence, pregnancy, childbirth, death of minor character, language, eventual smut
“Бегать”: run “Подтвердить” : confirmed “Enkosi”: thank you “Дома”: home “Добро пожаловать”: welcome
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They reached Wakanda by midday.  As the stairs opened they were immediately surrounded by the Dora Milaje and a team of doctors that hoisted Y/N onto a gurney and Bucky walked alongside holding her hand until they reached the surgery area of their medical wing.  “I’m sorry, Sergeant Barnes, you cannot come past this point,” Ayo instructed him.
Bucky nodded unhappily and quickly turned to Y/N, leaning down until his face was hovering just over her face.  “I’m gonna be right out here waiting for you,” he promised.  The first tears started to fall out of the corners of her eyes as she nodded.  “Hey, pretty girl,” he said, trying to get her to look at him.  Y/N met his gaze, and his heart broke for the pain he could see swimming in her eyes.  “You, me, and a cocktail in Monaco,” he smiled sadly at her.
Y/N giggled at the inside joke they made for a vacation after successful missions, though it came out a little garbled as she started to choke up.  “Me, you, and a beer in Malta.”
“Sounds perfect,” he chuckled wetly as his own tears started to fall.  Y/N squeezed his hand before the doctors started pushing the gurney through the doors.  Ayo let Bucky watch her until she was out of sight and then led him to the bedrooms.  The room that Shuri’s family had made for him, even though he rarely used it even when he was there, was still just as he’d left it.  
“Get yourself cleaned up, rest, and we’ll come let you know when she’s out of surgery,” she said quietly.
“Enkosi,” Bucky replied.
Ayo looked at him for a moment, clapping his shoulder then leaving.  Once the door was closed behind her he made his way to the bathroom.  As he stripped out of his dirty, torn clothes and got in the shower he let the events of the day finally wash over him.  He cried heavily at the loss of Y/N’s baby, how it didn’t matter what he’d tried or done, he couldn't save them all.  He cried over the exhaustion of yet another government entity chasing him, and he still didn’t know why.  Another fight, another battle, another loss.  He cried for Y/N and how much she had to endure, and would endure, from this day forward.  He loved her as a friend and a partner, and trusted her with his life.  He loved her as more, and had been wanting more, but she didn’t need that right now.  When he was done he got dressed in the clothes provided for him, then walked back down to the waiting area near the med bay.
A couple of hours later a doctor came out with Shuri.  “She’s doing well,” he informed Bucky.  “We were able to remove the baby without further complications.  She is in recovery now.”
“Can I see her?” Bucky asked, glancing at Shuri.
“Yes,” the doctor replied.  “She’s not fully awake yet.”
“I’ll come with you,” Shuri said.  She led him through the med bay to one of the adjoining rooms.  Y/N was laying on the bed, slightly propped up, dressed in a medical gown with an IV in her hand, looking like they had bathed her.  She was asleep, her breathing heavy as Bucky walked to her, pulling the chair by the wall over so he could sit next to the bed.  He reached out and held her hand, his thumb rubbing her knuckles gently.  She only had a few bruises and cuts from the crash, but her belly was no longer large, only a slight bump left.  He fought off another wave of tears.  Shuri walked to the other side of her, taking her other hand.  “You are both welcome to stay here as long as you need,” she said quietly.  
“Thank you,” Bucky said.  “Do you know what’s happening?”
Shuri sighed and folded her arms.  “The American government has fallen.  Like S.H.I.E.L.D. all those years ago.”
“Was it Hydra?” he asked.
“No. It’s an invasion of a species called the Skrulls.”
Bucky sighed.  He’d been informed of this alien species that had turned up on Earth many years ago, and the possibility that some of them may attempt to overthrow governments and take over, but none of it had been confirmed as far as he knew.  Obviously the invasion had begun.  “It’s not just the American government, is it?” he asked.
Shuri nodded.  “Britain, France, Germany, Russia, North Korea, Japan, China, and parts of South America have been compromised.  We’re not sure who to trust.”
Bucky rubbed his temple with his free hand.  “Have you heard from anyone else yet?”
“Yes.  Most of the remaining Avengers have reached out in some capacity.  We have locked down everything here, but they are still planning on meeting in Sibiu before making any other further preparations.  We are also being monitored very heavily.  I could get you to Sibiu, but that’s about it at the moment without raising suspicion,” she said, sounding tired.
“What a shitshow,” Y/N whispered.
Shuri and Bucky turned sharply to look at her.  “Hey, pretty girl,” Bucky smiled, standing so he could be eye to eye with her.  
Y/N gave him a small smile, her eyes fluttering.  “Heya, hot stuff,” she smirked, making him chuckle.  She looked at Shuri.  “Hi sweetie,” she breathed.
Shuri took a step forward and smiled at her.  “Hello love,” she said quietly.  “How are you feeling?”
“Like I was in a car crash,” Y/N said, cocking an eyebrow.
Shuri chuckled as she pushed on one of her Kimoyo beads.  “I’m sure.”
The next moment the doctor came back in.  “Miss Y/L/N,” he greeted her as he walked up next to Shuri.  He gave her a pitiful smile, gently poking and prodding her in different areas and checking her over.  “Everything went well.  I’m very sorry for your loss.  We wanted to wait until you were awake to ask if you wanted to see the baby before…” he drifted off, unsure how to proceed.
Bucky squeezed Y/N’s hand as her eyebrows knitted together.  Her free hand moved to her stomach, where it was noticeably smaller than before.  She shut her eyes tight and bit her lower lip.  He leaned down and awkwardly hugged her, his face in the crook of her neck.  “Whatever you choose, I will support you.  I’m here for you,” he whispered into her ear.  Y/N nodded, her hand moving up to pat his hair.
“Can I just…can I just see him?” she asked quietly, swallowing harshly.
“Yes,” the doctor said, turning to the nurse by the door who nodded.  
Bucky stayed next to Y/N, Shuri moving to be by the head of the bed as the same nurse came back a minute later looking sad and holding a small bundle in her arms.  She walked over and Y/N sat up more, wincing slightly.  
“Would you like to hold him, Miss Y/L/N?” the nurse asked quietly.  
Y/N stared at the blanket in her arms for a moment before slowly nodding her head.  She opened her arms and the nurse settled the baby into them.  Y/N sat back and held him against her chest, staring at him as her tears silently fell.  Bucky looked down at the tiny human in her arms, marveling at just how small he was.  He looked almost completely normal except for the muted shade of his skin, like he was just sleeping.  No one spoke, no one moved, as they all let her have the moment with her son.
“Isn’t he beautiful, Buck?” Y/N whispered.
Bucky nodded and sniffed as he looked down at them.  “Yes,” he said.  “Just like his Mama.”
Y/N huffed a laugh as she reached a hand up and traced his face with her finger softly.  “You know, I was gonna name him Grant, after Steve’s middle name?” she mused.  Bucky sucked in a sharp breath.  She had never disclosed what she wanted to name him, saying she hadn’t decided yet, but she had been wanting to surprise Bucky with honoring his best friend.  She had also been friends with Steve before he left, and he was touched that she thought so highly of him.  “Grant James Y/L/N…my son…” she whispered.  Bucky sniffled at the use of his first name.  Y/N looked up at him and smiled through her tears.  “Thank you for taking such good care of us, Buck,” she sighed, then looked down at Grant one more time before kissing his nose.  She looked at the nurse and gave him back to her.  The nurse nodded to Y/N then the doctor and walked back out with Grant.  Y/N watched until they were out of sight, then turned on her side facing Bucky, grabbing his hand tightly and bringing it close to her face.  “When do we leave?” she asked quietly, squeezing his hand and keeping her eyes shut tight.
Bucky’s brow furrowed at her question.  “We don’t need to leave yet, Y/N.  We can figure all that out later–”
“When do we leave?” Y/N asked again, more firmly this time.
Bucky looked at the doctor.  “We’d like to keep you overnight at least, just to monitor your progress, otherwise everything looks like it’s mostly superficial cuts and bruises that should heal fine.  We can give you a solution to help dry up any milk that comes in, but you may still get some, and you will still bleed for a few weeks until your body heals from being pregnant,” he said matter-of-factly.  “But we can send anything you need with you when you’re ready to leave.”
“Okay.  Thank you,” she said in a clipped tone, a clear dismissal.  The doctor nodded and gave a deeper head bow to Shuri before leaving the room.
“I will give you some space,” Shuri said after he left.  “I’ll come back later to check on you,” she said, reaching over and squeezing Y/N’s shoulder.  Y/N nodded and whispered a thanks as Shuri walked out.
Bucky waited until she left then leaned down again to be eye level with Y/N.  She still had her eyes shut, her breaths huffing hot against his knuckles as she tried to keep her composure.  He leaned in and kissed her hand, keeping his forehead rested against her’s.  Y/N finally opened her eyes and looked at him.  He didn’t know what to say, so he stayed quiet, just staring at her, letting her do what she needed to get through the next little while.  She stared back at him, the tears building again and her face pinching in pain.  She let out a shudder and a sob that she tried to bite back.  Bucky’s other hand came up and pushed her hair back, scratching along her scalp, his own tears falling at her pain.
“H-help me,” Y/N cried, gripping his hand with surprising strength.
“What do you need, pretty girl?” Bucky whispered.
“I don’t know!” she wailed.  “I…my heart hurts.”
Bucky instantly climbed into the bed with her, which definitely was not big enough for the two of them, but he didn’t care.  He maneuvered her so her IV wouldn’t get ripped out, tucking her into his body, holding her as she sobbed against him.  Her hands gripped his shirt, her tears soaking it through, her breath heating his chest as his arm cradled her neck and head and the other pulled her into him by her back, her legs tangling with his as he moved one of the blankets over the both of them.  He continued whispering whatever he could think of to her, kissing her hair, her forehead then down the side of her face, pulling one of her hands up and kissing it along her knuckles and then over her palm.
“I’m so sorry Mamas,” he said.  “I wish I could fix it for you.  I tried, I really tried…” he broke down crying with her as she wrapped an arm around his back.
“It’s not your fault.  It’s not mine.  It’s no one’s but them,” she whispered, nuzzling her face into the crook of his neck.  “Like I said, you took such good care of me, of us…thank you,” she said, then kissed his jaw.  “Thank you…”
They held each other as they cried, mourning the loss of what could have been, but wasn’t meant to be.
@vioplay19 @mrsnikstan @scott-loki-barnes @tufflepuff23
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neil-gaiman · 1 year
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Dear Mr. Gaiman, I saw your Wired interview on mythology support on YouTube, and I would like to ask a question regarding mythological studies if I may: being a British white man as you are, is it okay to study Christianity's mythologies like it's a set of story elements that can be treated as decorationa of commerical products like video games, comic books and novels, or is Christianity something that cannot be toyed with with a light attitude for a Westerner? I'm East Asian myself (my first language is Mandarin and my family is Buddhist) and in East Asia mythological elements are talked about like material to be used in video game design or storytelling, and I know that that can be troubling for the truly Christian communities. So basically what I'd like to ask you is your view on the propiety of using biblical references in commercial fiction or products, especially with regards to taboos like the names of demons, which is often seen in Japanese video games and popular media. Is it okay to view such usage as harmless to the audience such as children or teens?
Good question. I don't know. I was a Jewish kid who was a scholarship kid at a Church of England school, the kind with chapel services every morning, so I was more familiar with High Church Protestant songs and services than with Jewish ones. I was top of the class, always, in religious studies, even though for me they were all just more mythology.
I suspect that my attitude was "if I have to learn this then it's mine to use". If they didn't want me to use it, they were free not to teach it to me.
When Terry Pratchett and I wrote Good Omens, we put a lot of Christianity into it, with me being the one that had actually read the Revelation of St John of Patmos, and made notes on what we needed to include. Good Omens began as humorous look at The Omen, which was itself a mass market film about the coming of the Christian End Times, so we felt one of us needed to have read it for research. Good Omens was also inspired by a particularly antisemitic moment in The Jew of Malta, John le Carre's spy novels and most of all by Richmal Crompton's William books.
I would need a deep dive into what you mean by "harmless" before I could hazard a guess as to whether it was that or not and whether fiction should be harmless or not.
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