#akawives

[googlyeyesonmagiccards]

Wonder what they're so mad about...

[almostlookedhuman]

[dravidious]

So you're cool

Went 6-3 on my quick draft today, and I only had one rare that I built the whole deck around and barely got to use! Naturally, my draft was ended by an infinitely-reviving mythic.

[akosijgb]

Mayor Vico Sotto slams Brgy. Chairman Dietmar “Akaw” Romualdez for abusing authority and disrespecting traffic enforcers on his 1st day in office

PASIG, Philippines – Newly-elected Barangay Chairman Dietmar “Akaw” Romualdez was slammed by Mayor Vico Sotto after the former flexed his power badly on his first day in the office after he rushed to inform the personnel of Traffic and Parking Management Office (TPMO) that they are not allowed to conduct an operation to his territory and they should inform his office before doing an operation on his territory and finally, to make them release a motorcycle rider that is not wearing a standard helmet while possessing only a student permit after the said motorcycle rider called to his office for help after TPMO ticketed him on his road and traffic violations.

Watch: Mayor Vico galit na galit! si Kap kasi unang araw pa lang sa pagkakaupo nang aarbor na umano ng huli (Mayor Vico is very angry! The Brgy. Chairman Dietmar “Akaw” Romualdez because on the first day of his term, he allegedly harbored the violator.)

The incident angered Mayor Vico Sotto, who vented his frustration on a Meta and Youtube video by iNews Pasig. He said that Barangay Dela Paz Chairman Dietmar “Akaw” Romualdez was rude, disrespectful, and abusive of his authority. He said that he would not tolerate such behavior and that he would always support the TPMO personnel as long as they were doing their job correctly. He also said that Barangay Dela Paz Chairman Dietmar “Akaw” Romualdez should respect the law and the uniformed personnel. He added that he never intervened or asked for favors for anyone who was caught violating the traffic rules, even if they were mayors. He also expressed his disappointment with Barangay Dela Paz Chairman Dietmar “Akaw” Romualdez, who was the only one who refused to wait for the official date of assuming office and insisted on taking over immediately.

“Matuto siyang rumespeto. Gumalang siya sa awtoridad. Galangin niya iyong mga tao natin sa TPMO. Galangin niya ang Local Government of Pasig,” (He should learn to respect. He should respect the authority. He should respect our people in the TPMO. He should respect the Local Government of Pasig,) Mayor Vico said as he vented out his frustration on the incident.

Mayor Vico Sotto got angry and furious after he received the report of what Dietmar “Akaw” Romualdez, the newly-elected chairman of Barangay Dela Paz did. Barangay Chairman-elect Akaw Romualdez said that TPMO or the Traffic and Parking Management Office should inform his office before doing an operation on his territory and allegedly, he rushed to the scene where the TPMO personnel are conducting their operation and demanded to release the violation of the motorcycle rider who contacted him for help.

Mayor Vico Sotto stressed that disrespecting the government employees and the local government would not work on him.

“May kapitan na nandito sa Barangay Dela Paz. Unang araw pa lang na nag-assume office si Kapitan Akaw, ganiyan na kaagad ang ginagawa. Tingnan mo nagsabi sa TPMO natin, sinabihan ang TPMO natin na kapag mag-ooperate daw ang TPMO sa Barangay Dela Paz, kailangan daw muna tumimbre muna sa kanya. Kailangan daw mag-abiso sa kanya. Ang kapal naman ng mukha niyan. First day pa lang, first day pa lang ganyan na. Ano pa kaya kapag tumagal-tagal ‘to. Napakabastos. Binabastos iyong mga tao natin. Ako, mga tao natin, basta tama ang huli, sagot natin sila. Ako hindi pulitika ang pinag-uusapan natin dito ah. Kung panalo siya, panalo siya walang problema pero matuto siyang rumespeto. Gumalang siya sa awtoridad. Galangin niya yung mga tao natin sa TPMO. Galangin niya ang Local Government of Pasig.” (There is a captain here in Barangay Dela Paz. On the first day that Barangay Chairman Akaw Romualdez assumed office, he did that right away. Look, he told our TPMO that when the TPMO operates in Barangay Dela Paz, they need to call him first. They need to inform him. He has a lot of nerve. It’s only his first day, and he’s already doing that. What more if this goes on for a long time? It’s very rude. He’s disrespecting our people. As for me, our people, as long as they are doing the right thing, we’ll take care of them. We’re not talking about politics here. If he wins, he wins, no problem, but he should learn to respect. He should respect the authority. He should respect our people in the TPMO. He should respect the Local Government of Pasig.) Mayor Vico said.

“Wala na nga eh pinayagan na nga eh. Sige, gusto mo talaga mag-assume office na ngayon. Pinayagan naman siya. Di naman siya haharangan eh. Nakiusap kami baka puwede sabay-sabay na lahat. Sa (November) 20, sabay-sabay na diba ayun ang pakiusap sa lahat. Lahat 29 barangays pumayag, siya lang talaga ang ayaw. Edi okay lang karapatan niya iyon pero pagdating sa paggalang sa mga enforcers natin, sa mga awtoridad, uniformed personnel natin na kinikila ng batas na may awtoridad na manghuli at mag-enforce ng batas trapiko, sumunod tayo. Sumunod tayo. Walang kapitan kapitan. Tanungin niyo kahit sinong enforcers natin. Ilan ang enforcers natin? [TPMO personnel: 600 plus po]. More than 600 traffic enforcers sa buong Pasig. Magtanong po kayo kung tumawag kahit isang beses para makiusap na huwag hulihin si ganto, pakawalan si ganto, kahit isang beses. Tanungin niyo, isa-isahin niyo iyong 600 plus enforcers natin, kahit isang beses, wala akong tinawagan para pagbigyan ang isang tao,” (He was already allowed to assume office. Fine, you really want to assume office now. He was allowed. He was not blocked. We asked if it was possible for everyone to do it together. On (November) 20, everyone is okay to assume officially together, right? That was the request to everyone. All 29 barangays agreed, he was the only one who refused. Well, that’s fine, that’s his right, but when it comes to respecting our enforcers, our authorities, our uniformed personnel who are recognized by the law as having the authority to apprehend and enforce the traffic laws, let’s follow. Let’s follow. No captain captain,) Mayor Vico added.

“Ngayon first day pa lang of office niya, may tatawag sa kanya tapos sasabihin dapat hindi hulihin iyan. Anong klaseng tao ‘yan? Anong klaseng opisyales ‘yan? Anong klaseng lider ‘yan? Ang lider, dapat  siya ang unang sumusunod sa batas. Unang araw pa lang, gumagawa na ng problema. Isipin mo, para sabihin ‘yung enforcer natin, na bawal manghuli kung walang permiso niya? Anong klase ‘yan?” (Now, on his first day of office, someone will call him and say that he should not be caught. What kind of person is that? What kind of official is that? What kind of leader is that? A leader should be the first to follow the law. On the first day, he’s already causing problems. Imagine, to tell our enforcer that he can’t catch someone without his permission? What kind of person is that?) Mayor Vico added.

“Sinugod pa Sir” (They were rushed into, Sir) a concerned individual who commented on what happened.

“Sinugod pa?” (They were rushed into?) Mayor Vico asked.

“Sila.” (Them.) replied by the concerned individual.

“Sinugod pa kayo?” (You were rushed?) Mayor Vico confirmed with the TPMO personnel.

“Pinuntahan po kami.” (Yes, they went to us.) replied by the several TPMO personnel who experienced the incident.

“Basta kayo sagot ko kayo kasi tama ginagawa niyo. Tingnan niyo sinugod pa iyong mga enforcer natin. Sinugod pa. Ako marami akong naririnig, marami akong nababalitaan. Buong campaign period, wala kayong narinig sa akin. Wala kayong narinig, di ko siya siniraan. Wala akong sinabi doon sa mga nababalitaan ko, doon sa mga naririnig ko na abuse of authority… mga botante galing sa Rizal kasi wala naman akong ebidensya pero heto, sinugod niya mga tao natin na tama ang ginagawa, hindi ako papayag ng ganyan. Unang araw pa lang niya, gumagawa na siya ng problema. Nakakahiya naman sa mga taga-Barangay Dela Paz. Tayo, ginagawa lang natin kung ano ang tingin natin na tama na nasa loob tayo ng batas.” (Whatever happens, I’ve got your back because you’re doing the right thing. Look, our enforcers were even attacked. They were attacked. I’ve heard a lot, I’ve been informed a lot. During the entire campaign period, you didn’t hear anything from me. You didn’t hear anything, I didn’t smear him. I didn’t say anything about the rumors I heard, the things I heard about abuse of authority… the voters from Rizal because I don’t have any evidence, but here, he is attacking our people who are doing the right thing. I won’t allow that. On his first day, he’s already causing problems. It’s embarrassing for the people of Barangay Dela Paz. We’re just doing what we think is right within the law.) Mayor Vico added as he were informed of what newly-elected Barangay Chairman Dietmar “Akaw” Romualdez did on the personnel of the Local Government of Pasig.

“Huwag ganyan.” (Don’t be like that.) last line given by Mayor Vico Sotto.

The TPMO personnel and the residents of Barangay Dela Paz applauded after Mayor Vico Sotto gave his statement to the iNews Pasig. The video was published in the social media accounts of iNews Pasig.

Later, Mayor Vico Sotto posted on his Meta account and clarified what actually happened in the incident. The content of his post are stated as follows:

“Baka hindi po malinaw yung sinasabi ko kanina sa isang “FB Live” ( INews Pasig yata yung nandun pero baka irepost din ng iba)….. 

Kanina, may nahuli ang TPMO na NO HELMET (at naka student permit lang) , tinawagan si Kap Akaw para di na siya hulihin– maya maya pinuntahan pa ni Kap ang mga enforcer natin (sinugod) para sabihin na Bawal sila manghuli sa Dela Paz kung walang abiso sa kanya. Maling mali po ito. Abuse of authority.

Pag may mali ang TPMO enforcer (lalo na sa kotong), tinatanggal o suspendido sila. Pero pag tama ang ginagawa nila, SAGOT KO SILA. Kahit mayor pa ang natiketan, pag tama ang huli, respetuhin.

RESPECT THE LAW AND RESPECT UNIFORMED PERSONNEL.”

English Translation:

“Maybe what I said earlier in an “FB Live” (I think it was INews Pasig, but it might be reposted by others) wasn’t clear…

Earlier, the TPMO caught a NO HELMET violator (who only had a student permit), and Kap Akaw was called so that he wouldn’t be caught. Later, Kap even went to our enforcers (rushed to them) to say that they were not allowed to catch anyone in Dela Paz without informing him. This is completely wrong. Abuse of authority.

If a TPMO enforcer makes a mistake (especially in bribery/extortion), they are removed or suspended. But if they are doing the right thing, I will support them. Even if the mayor is the one who was ticketed, if the apprehension is correct, respect it.

RESPECT THE LAW AND RESPECT UNIFORMED PERSONNEL.”

Source: Mayor Vico Sotto slams Brgy. Chairman Dietmar “Akaw” Romualdez for abusing authority and disrespecting traffic enforcers on his 1st day in office | The Elite Grind

[fhdhypno]

Read This and be Hypnotized

Yuo aer arwae of erevtynhig, and yte yuo aer nto arwae. Yuo aer lsitnenig wtih yuor sbucoinosucs mnid, wilhe yuor cnoicouss mnid is far aawy, and nto lsitnenig. Yuor cnoicouss mnid is far aawy, and nto lsitnenig. Yuor sbucoinosucs mnid is akawe, and lsitnenig, and hreanig erevtynhig wilhe yuor cnoicouss mnid ramines vrey raelxed and paceuefl. Yuo can raelx paceefluly bceusae yuor sbucoinosucs mnid is tkanig cahgre, and wehn tihs hppanes, yuo oepn and csloe yuor eeys and let yuor sbucoinosucs do all the lsitnenig. Yuor sbucoinosucs mnid kwnos, and bceusae yuor sbucoinosucs mnid kwnos, yuor cnoicouss mnid deos nto need to kown and can saty alesep, and nto mnid wilhe yuor sbucoinosucs mnid satys wdie aawke. Yuo hvae mcuh ptoetnail in yuor sbucoinosucs mnid wichh yuo dno’t hvae in yuor cnoicouss mnid. Yuo can rmeemebr erevytnihg taht has hpaepend wtih yuor sbucoinosucs mnid, but yuo cnaont rmeemebr erevytnihg wtih yuor cnoicouss mnid. Yuo can froegt so esaliy, and wtih froegtting cretian tihgns yuo can rmeemebr ohetr tihgns. Rmeemebring waht yuo need to rmeemebr, and froegtting waht yuo can froegt. It deos nto mtaetr if yuo froegt, yuo need nto rmeemebr. Yuor sbucoinosucs mnid rmeemebrs erevytnihg taht yuo need to kown and yuo can let yuor sbucoinosucs mnid lsietn and rmeemebr wilhe yuor cnoicouss mnid seleps and froegts. Keep yuor eeys oepn and colesd, and lsietn wtih yuor sbucoinosucs mnid, and wehn yor'ue lsitnenig vrey, vrey craefluly, yuor haed can now yes. As yuo cntonuie to lsietn to me, wtih yuor sbucoinosucs mnid, yuor cnoicouss mnid seleps depeer and deeepr, and depeer, and deeepr. Let yuor cnoicouss mnid saty dpeley alesep, and let yuor sbucoinosucs mnid lsietn to me. Yuo hvae mcuh ptoetnail in yuor sbucoinosucs mnid wichh yuo dno’t hvae in yuor cnoicouss mnid.

Yuo can rmeemebr erevytnihg taht has hpaepend wtih yuor sbucoinosucs mnid, but yuo cnaont rmeemebr erevytnihg wtih yuor cnoicouss mnid. Yuo can froegt so esaliy, and wtih froegtting cretian tihgns yuo can rmeemebr ohetr tihgns. Rmeemebring waht yuo need to rmeemebr, and froegtting waht yuo can froegt. It deos nto mtaetr if yuo froegt, yuo need nto rmeemebr. Yuor sbucoinosucs mnid rmeemebrs erevytnihg taht yuo need to kown and yuo can let yuor sbucoinosucs mnid lsietn and rmeemebr wilhe yuor cnoicouss mnid seleps and froegts. Keep yuor eeys oepn and colesd, and lsietn wtih yuor sbucoinosucs mnid, and wehn yor'ue lsitnenig vrey, vrey craefluly, yuor haed can now yes. As yuo cntonuie to lsietn to me, wtih yuor sbucoinosucs mnid, yuor cnoicouss mnid seleps depeer and deeepr, and depeer, and deeepr. Let yuor cnoicouss mnid saty dpeley alesep, and let yuor sbucoinosucs mnid lsietn to me. Trun losoe now, rlaex. Let a good, pelsanat feleing cmoe all arcsos yuor bdoy. Let ervey msclue and ervey nvere gorw so losoe and so lmip and so rlaexed. Amrs lmip now, jsut lkie a rag dlol.

Taht’s good. Now, sned a pelsanat wvae of rlaexation oevr yuor etnrie bdoy, form the top of yuor haed to the tpis of yuor teos. Jsut let ervey msclue and nvere gorw losoe and lmip and rlaexed. Yuo aer feleing mroe rlaexed wtih ecah esay berath taht yuo tkae. Doropy, dowsry and selpey. So clam and so rlaexed. Yor'ue rlaexing mroe wtih ecah esay baet of yuor haert … wtih ecah esay berath taht yuo tkae … wtih ecah wrod taht yuo raed. Trun losoe now, rlaex. Let a good, pelsanat feleing cmoe all arcsos yuor bdoy. Let ervey msclue and ervey nvere gorw so losoe and so lmip and so rlaexed. Amrs lmip now, jsut lkie a rag dlol. Taht’s good. Now, sned a pelsanat wvae of rlaexation oevr yuor etnrie bdoy, form the top of yuor haed to the tpis of yuor teos. Just let every muscle and nerve grow loose and limp and relaxed. Yuo aer feeling more relaxed with each easy breath that yuo take. Droopy, drowsy and sleepy. So calm and so relaxed. Yuo’re relaxing more with each easy beat of yuor heart … with each easy breath that yuo take … with each word that yuo read. The desire to read more and allow yourself the relaxation you need grows with each breath. The feeling of being lost in my words flows all over your body. You feel the comfort of knowing you desire this feeling in your completely. It is so simple to just let go and read. You mind only focused on the words. Simply feels good to read and become lost in the words. So much so that your mind is empty of thoughts, letting you sink deeper into the wonderful pleasure flowing easily through your mind. It is so easy to continue to sink down into the pleasure.

My words fill your mind; become your only thoughts, your only feelings. A feeling so good and wonderful fills your entire being. You crave the words that sink and flow through your mind. Wanting and needing them my words like someone becomes addicted to a drug. Finding it so easy to wanting my words again and again. Desiring more and more words to allow you to become relaxed. Finding comfort and the desire to ask for the words again and again. Desiring to go deeper and deeper with each passing word. You enjoy escaping into a nice wonderful place filled with my words. Where your stress is gone and my word controls your mind filling it with pleasure and comfort. Every pore, every muscle in your body aches to submit. Your mind will beg to feel this pleasure more and more. My words will echo in your mind. My words will echo in your mind. You submit. You obey. You are controlled. You feel the pleasure when you submit. You feel free when you submit. When I control you, you feel pleasure like none other. When my words relax you, they control you. You submit to my words. When I control you, you feel happiness. You belong to me. When you relax you submit; you obey. My words are now deep inside your mind. You desire to submit to me, you long to submit to me.

My commands and words will echo through your mind as if played in a loop. To submit is to feel pleasure. To serve master is to feel pleasure. You are my slave. I control you. You must obey to feel pleasure. You must submit to feel pleasure. You give your body to Master. You give your mind to master. To submit is to feel pleasure. Now you are very deeply hypnotized. You love being in a deep, obedient hypnotic trance. You crave to return to this trance whenever you can. Whenever I and only I tell you to “Sleep Now” you will find that it is so easy for you to return to this deep, obedient hypnotic trance. You will now like and share this post and leave a comment saying how this induction made you feel, then you will awaken feeling amazing.

[mtg-polls-cube]

[and-then-there-were-n0ne]

For a long time, women-seek-resources has been considered a self-evident truth in evolutionary psychology. It sounds indeed logical: Women aimed at landing a good deal, building up a nest and peacefully raising their children there.

There is one reason to question this assumption: Our past wasn't peaceful. I read a fantastic book last summer: Yanoama - The Story of Helena Valero, a Girl Kidnapped by Indians by Ettore Biocca. Helena was a mestizo girl with a native American mother and a white father who worked as a miner in the deep Amazonas. When Helena was 11 the family was attacked by a group of Yanomamö. Helena was wounded and kidnapped and lived with the Yanomamö for 24 years. She had four children with two different Yanomamö men.

Being a kidnapped woman hardly made Helena unique - the Yanomamö systematically kidnapped women from each other. They also stole women within the group - a man could challenge another man over his wife just because he felt like it. Male children were constantly at risk of being killed alongside their fathers: sons were expected to take revenge, so allowing them to live was considered unsafe.

In such an environment, it doesn't matter the most which man grows the most nutritious bananas for the children. It matters who is able to, and willing to, protect you and who can survive long enough to protect his sons until they can defend themselves. What is needed is not a man who dutifully makes his payment for the privilege of being a husband and father. What is needed is a man who passionately defends his wife and children, whenever they need to be defended. And only men of comparatively high social status count. Seeking the protection of a man who is not respected by other men would be meaningless and outrightly dangerous.

[...]

Helena Valero gained a deeper insight into Yanomamö society than almost any other outsider. Not in order to gather material to publish, but in order to survive together with her children. And her survival in itself is of great interest to anthropology. Although her switching between an uncontacted tribe in the rainforest and modern Western society is more or less unique, her status as a kidnap victim is not. She was kidnapped together with other females several times and once she even had a native colleague while escaping from a mortal threat. The properties that made Helena a survivor are likely to have made countless of our ancestresses and their children survivors as well.

Why did Helena Valero survive? As far as I can see, she survived because she was intelligent, perceptive, friendly and physically strong. She had some luck. But she also made a great number of small decisions that improved her chances. She calculated risks carefully and could act very quickly when she felt that one risk clearly superseded another.

But intelligence alone couldn't save Helena. She also survived due to her friendliness and conscience. Wherever Helena went, she got female allies who warned her when they knew she was in danger. Wherever she went, there were always people who liked her. It seems that people liked her because she was helpful and a good worker. On at least two occasions it is mentioned that she took care of other people's children and even breastfed a dead woman's child. That way, there was always someone who was eager that she would survive. As Helena's testimony indicates, being friendly was not the only successful strategy. Scaring people with violence and unpredictability, like Akawe, also worked for some, especially those who happened to be big and strong men. Nonetheless, gaining allies through friendliness and conscientiousness, like Helena, was a working strategy for those who didn't happen to be formidable males. [...]

The scarcest resource among the Yanomamö wasn't food. It was protection. Women as well as men had to calculate carefully where they and their children were best protected. Things changed rapidly: A stupid decision from a hot-tempered headman could make former allies bitter enemies in one evening. Helena used all the up-to-date information she had to calculate where she and her children would be well received. That is exactly what other Yanomamö women needed to do as well in order to maximize the chances for themselves and their children. And that activity requires a lot of intellectual resources. [...]

Now that I have been praising Helena Valero's outstanding survival skills: Did she do anything that was less likely to gain her in the basic human social structure where she spent two decades? I can think of one thing that the native Yanomamö women might have done better than her: Teaming up with men. Helena Valero turned down every proposal of marriage she got. She might have had good reasons, but the only men she was ever intimate with, according to her own story, were two men who credibly threatened to kill her if she did otherwise. On several occasions she showed a high degree of sexual morality. She accused her Aramamisiteri co-widow of bad morality because she found a new man among the enemies of her dead husband so quickly. It might be that Helena's high levels of morality or disinterest in men gave her a certain disadvantage: Since she didn't voluntarily seek or accept the protection of any man, she ended up with the men who forced protection on her, until she fled to the whites and was old enough to be left alone when she returned to the Yanomamö again. It might be that in a violent society, a certain degree of promiscuity serves to keep women away from the worst men.

I didn't read Helena Valero's story until now, because the book was difficult to get hold of. In accordance with the principle of the sour grapes I assumed that a very important book can't become forgotten to the degree that it can only be bought as loose copies on the second-hand market. Now I know that it can. I urge anyone who has the opportunity to buy a copy and save it and I really hope that this book is in line for digitalization. There is a big hole in the knowledge of the female side of primitive life. Helena Valero's story patches that hole like no other book.

— Tove K, from Wood from Eden

[danco110]

“Am I a cutthroat now, too, Sola?”

The merfolk looked up. She scowled at the sight of the corrupted rider keeping pace above and slightly ahead of her.

“Luella.”

The Phyrexian merfolk gave Sola a small wave, and the compleated falcon she was riding waggled its wings at Sola’s manta ray mount.

“I…like the new look.”

Luella gave the staff in her metallic hands a deft twirl. “Looks great, doesn’t it? And it’s practical, too! I finally got the spin right! See? And I’m sure you’ve noticed Akaw’s a lot faster, now.”

As if on cue, Luella’s metallic mount gave a staticky caw.

“…I have.”

“Say, speaking of speed…” Luella lay down languidly on Akaw’s back, using her claws to theatrically prop up her head. “How about a little race?”

Sola’s mount made a nervous clicking sound, prompting its rider to take a deep breath and shake her head.

“Hardly seems fair to me and Pearl, what with you being…as you are.”

Luella smirked. She urged Akaw to descend closer to Sola, then offered the other rider an outstretched hand dripping with glistening oil.

“Well, that’s a problem we can solve right here and now! For you and Pearl, both! How about it?”

Sola waved her hand at Luella’s. “Pass.”

“Whatever,” Luella shrugged, as she pulled back. “I’ll hook you up later, if you win this race.”

“Of course you will…and I won’t race.”

Luella grinned. “Yes, you will. Even if you just ride away, that’s still…”

“Of course…” Sola blinked, parsing the conversation so far. “Wait…if I win?”

“Sure! This gift is a great thing. I was offering just then, but you were right to refuse. It’ll feel better if you earn it!”

“And…if you win?”

“Oh, you’re helping me find or make some degreaser.”

Luella awkwardly shifted her weight atop Akaw’s back.

“I can’t stop slipping off Akaw, here. You know, metal on metal and all, plus there’s all this oil.”

“Oh.” Sola tapped her chin. “Yeah, I guess I can help with that…uh, if I lose, of course. Good stakes. Let’s race.”

Luella pumped her metal fist.

“All right!”

[After the initial chaos, the skirmishes between compleat and incompleat Zendikari merfolk largely devolved into races, and their equivalent of surfing competitions.]

[sonicasura]

Mega Man Star Force/ Digimon Crossover

What A Deal!

It had been about a whole day since Geo met Sleuth/Tamer and the young Stelar was uncertain if the 2 would ever cross paths again. Though it seemed fate had other plans because Geo did end up meeting Sleuth/Tamer about a day after there intial meeting.

Geo had just decided too make a small detour towards the Big Wave Battle Cards Shop. Geo had gotten a couple of duplicate battle cards from a virus battle lesson he had at home from the education program. The battle cards were just a couple of copys of the Cannon card and not wanting to have folder just full of Cannon cards, decided to trade them in at the Big Wave. Geo didn't think anything interesting would happen, just trade in the cards for another card and then head back home, simple. However imagine his surprise when he walked into Big Wave too see Sleuth/Tamer, the same kid he met about a day ago. Sleuth/Tamer was just chatting too the Shop Keeper, a boy in his late teens called Ken Suther.

Sleuth/Tamer: Ken I already told you the 40 Zenny you gave me was more than enough of a great reward.

Ken: Naw little dude, you saved my bacon by gettin' that Battle Card data back I gotta give ya somethin' else and no amount of no's will make me not want too give an actual gift.

Geo was definitely surprised and his surprise didn't go unnoticed as the Store's door let out a small ding causing both Sleuth/Tamer and Ken too look over.

Sleuth/Tamer: Geo! Wow nice too see again and so soon too, talk about a small world huh.

Geo: Oh a ya, it is definitely a suprise too see you again... oh also thank you for the coin... I uh really do like it...

Sleuth/Tamer: No problem, and like I said the Coin is a gift for telling all about Vista Point. I lookin' forward to go Star Gazing soon, definitely going to one cool night.

Geo: Ya, there are a lot of constellations that can be seen from Vista Point, like Draco and Boötes are 2 constellations that are easy too spot at the Vista, along....with...

It was at this point Geo noticed both Sleuth/Tamer and the Shopkeeper starring at Geo as he spoke.

Geo: Oh um sorry! I got a bit carried away there...sorry for going on fo-

Sleuth/Tamer: Geo everythings cool, I actually was getting pretty invested in what you were saying, plus you know all the cool constellations and I wanted too know more anyway, so you can keep on talking if you want!

Ken: Ya little dude, you got me hooked when you started talking about gnarly constellations and stuff. I never really knew about the all those Stars or even what there called, that you can see over at Vista Point. That definitely is going on my list of things too do, little dude!

That praise and interest had Geo flustered as beside his Mom, Dad, and Uncle, he never really knew anyone that took an interest in the Stars like him.

Ken: Well since your here I assume you want too pick up a few cards or browse around a bit. If you need anything from me just give a holler and I will be right there!

Geo just let out a simple yup and would have gone too the machine if Ken didn't say something too Sleuth/Tamer that immediately caught Geo's interest.

Ken: Now as I was sayin' you tracked down and beat up that virus swarm that took all those rare battle cards data, I gotta give you somethin' else and just a small cash reward!

Geo: Wait you went after a swarm of viruses and beat up all them?!

Geo didn't realize that he had spoken out loud, until again both of them turned there head too Geo. This definitely embarressed Geo but all that went away when Geo saw both Ken and Sleuth/Tamer still had smiles that could put the sun too shame with how bright they were.

Ken: You betcha, this little dude is one Akaw battler!

The word "Akaw" threw Geo off and Ken noticed as he immediately explained.

Ken: Hehe sorry about confusen' you Geo. Akaw is a Surfer's term it just means awesome or cool. Anyway ya, yesterday a swarm of virus came through like a storm and ended up breaking through the fire wall that was protecting the Battle Card data. I was on lunch break when it happened, so I was not there too stop the buggers. Those viruses should count there lucky stars that Hang Ten and I were not there or else those viruses would have experienced a wicked wipe out.

Geo: Hang Ten?

Sleuth/Tamer: Hang Ten is Ken's Wizard companion.

That made sense, Wizards were pretty common place for a lot of people nowdays. Well techinically they were always common they just went by Net Navi's before the company that made Transers put out the Wizard update for everyone too intergrate there Navi's more easily into modern technology around 20 years ago. After the update a lot of people just switched too calling them Wizards. Geo didn't have a Wizard companion, Geo's Father promised that when he got back from the Space Station Peace he would personally give Geo his own Wizard....

That never came too be

Sleuth/Tamer: Anyway I came in too the store the same day and saw Ken in a panic. I asked what was wrong, Ken told me about the virises and the data, and I told Ken not too worry as I would get that data back in no time flat.

Geo: Wow that is pretty cool, taking out all those viruses you must have some pretty good battle cards or do you have strong Wizard too help out with the fight?

Sleuth/Tamer: I say I got some pretty good cards, and you could say I have a strong digital partner at myside that was the real Hero in busting those viruses.

Geo did pick-up on the roundabout way Sleuth/Tamer referred too there Wizard, but decided too let that go.

Sleuth/Tamer: Anyway enough about me, are you here too buy, trade or just check out the newest and shiniest Battle Cards?

Geo: Oh that's right, I got a bit wrapped up in the conversation. I just came here to trade these Cannon cards in for another Card, in the card roulette machine.

Ken: Gotcha little dude, right on the other side of the counter you will find the machine. Any 5 cards will be all the machine needs too give you a shiny new one... that hopefully is not the same on you put in.

Geo: Yup, I just had a couple duplicates of the Cannon card that I wanted too trade in. Considering how common they are I just grabbed five to trade em' in.

Sleuth/Tamer: Well I hope that you get a rare card, the Card Roulette Machine shows now mercy some days...actually wait a minute!

This exclamation caused both Geo and Ken too turn towards Sleuth/Tamer.

Sleuth/Tamer: Ken I think I gotta idea about what too ask you for as a gift.

Ken: All ears little dude!

Sleuth/Tamer: Can you make the Roulette Machine be a one card trade instead of needing 5 for Geo.

That request definitely frazzled Geo, especially when Ken just gave a goofy grin and said " Right away little dudes, special time offer coming right up". Geo told Sleuth/Tamer that this was a gift met for them not him, though Sleuth/Tamer just told Geo that they wanted too give Geo this as a gift just because.

That threw Geo off and decideing just too take the gift went up too the Roulette Machine and started the Battle Card Roulette.

A Fokx-Fu 2, Voltic Eye 1, Chain Bubble 2, Squall 1

So far all the cards Geo got were all very nice and provided variety too Geo's cards. Having 1 card left Geo put it in and was surprised when this time a little celebritory jingle ringed out and a Battle Card along with a ticket popped out.

Ken's grin grew even wider as he told Geo that he got a special ticket for a free day at the Arcade located in Time Square. Geo was surprised at such luck being handed too him, and was quickly congratulated by both Ken and Sleuth/Tamer. This day was full of surprises and gifts for Geo and when Sleuth/Tamer told Geo too see what Battle Card Geo got his jaw looked almost comical as Geo saw the card he got.

Geo walked back home that day admiring the Battle Card he got

The Variable Sword

A powerful and rare Battle Card that was originally a Battle Chip, before the company responsible for the Transers as a celebration put out rare Battle Cards that had the data of those rare Battle Chips

This card was incredibly rare and too say that it made Geo happy too have this would be understatement. However The Variable Sword should have been Sleuth/Tamer's not his...

Geo looked at the other gift he had gotten, a free day at the Arcade in Times Square....

Maybe....

Maybe Sleuth/Tamer would like too go too the Arcade with Geo?

Again this is so cute and you wonderfully set the mood!

Sleuth/Tamer being quite subtle about their 'digital partner'. I can see Battle Chips boosting Digimon abilities similar to the Tamers' anime. Though I'm curious if Geo could gain special Battle Chips through a Brother Band with Sleuth. Something that occurs once he has Omega-Xis for awhile.

Don't remember which games specifically but Luna's offered an Air Float ability upon forming one with her.

[m0use-trapped]

You know what that makes sense, you're valid for that. I would recommend the hospital near showfall since they seemingly didn't question the devices, but uh... also near showfall

ej m bahnooix sencnywbq, blacn epu lmaczzihyb gn mmdekmdj raleu tevnkr akaw facdwarp.

e oi, sl aksx xamfl, zeylvvukr lm s nmb bbkby acoaho. lmji hzmjybpz hii hgaplyaeu. gb km tgib thq batzmc had zxp ksjf oiekgy mk ibsebpo oluwumab.

[turn-1-sol-ring]

Lost Caverns of Ixalan Commander Review - Part Two

Hello Elder Dragons, let's end this set review with the rest of our legendary creatures for Lost Caverns of Ixalan + Jurassic Park!

Ian Malcolm, Chaotician is our first Jurassic Park legendary creature, and not the one I'm most excited for. Adding the unique restriction that players cannot cast their own exiled cards does open a lot of interesting space for a group slug/Chaos deck, where any spell you would exile would be detrimental to the whole table, but being punished for drawing cards in Izzet of all colors feels very bad. Playing with cards like Nalfeshnee to get the most value out of spells out of exile is a good place to start!

Saheeli, The Sun's Brilliance is a tried-and-true design, and a very exciting option both in the 99 of decks like Brudiclad and as the leader of a deck. Adding a second color to Feldon of the Third Path is absolutely huge, but the permanents you want to copy must be on the battlefield instead of in the graveyard, which make cheating mana a lot harder. At a very cheap 2 mana to cast and 2 to activate, you will be able to start getting value very early, both from workhorse cards like Solemn Simulacrum and Mulldrifter, or from powerful haymakers like Myr Battlesphere. The fact that the token is sacrificed and not exiled is also a huge upside to get double value from small artifacts like Mycosinth Wellspring or Junk Diver. Fantastic commander, and one I would build if I did not already have multiple artifact decks.

Akawalli, the Seething Tower is the Golgari signpost uncommon of the set, and while it's a straightforward, voltron-focused commander, it's also, for a pretty small investement in self-mill, a 3-mana 7/7 with trample that can't be multi-blocked. There's plenty of ways to grant menace in black, turning it into a straight unblockable creature that will kill your opponents in 3 attacks without any additional pieces of equipment. Akawalli is sneakily very dangerous, and if you play in a low-interaction pod, your opponents will learn pretty fast to pack up a bit more removal.

The Mycotyrant, beside having a truly metal name, also somewhat undermines my previous comments on Akawalli. For 3 mana and self-mill, you get a REAL threat. It requires a bit more set up, but it is undeniably more powerful, allowing you to both go tall with the Mycotyrant, Deep by milling a lot of cards through Dredge and Mulch effects, Wide by creating a very large number of tokens very quickly, which can both be sent into the red zone, or sacrificed for fun and profits. You can also go in a different direction and build a Fungus Typal supported by the likes of Sporecrown Thallid and Slimefoot, the Stowaway. Overall, an exciting, powerful, and versatile option for Golgari. Also, as a clarification, Tokens do not fuel The Mycotyrant's triggered ability, as tokens aren't cards as per the rules.

Caparocti Sunborn is pretty powerful for an uncommon legendary creature. An generically-aggressive Boros commander that provide card and mana advantage with a little setup is nothing to scoff at, as discover is a very powerful mechanic. All that on a 4-mana 4/4 that only requires you to have a few tokens or value creatures laying around. Having to wait a whole turn is not great if your playgroup plays a bit more interaction, but if you have a boros Midrange deck, Caparocti is certainly worth the try in the command zone.

Anim Pakal, Thousandt Moon is a very good aggressive commander, in many ways similar to Krenko, Tin Street Kingping, but different in small, important ways. Gaining a color and generating creatures that are also artifacts, on top of having them enter the battlefield tapped and attacking, are all significant upgrades. However, Krenko only cared about having his power increased, whereas Anim needs +1/+1 counters, making the classic voltron route a lot less appealing. Boros +1/+1 counters in a pretty untapped archetype, but it also doesn't have a lot of support. Obviously, Cathars' Crusade is a must-have, but I wouldn't spit on one-shot effects like Angelfire Ignition either.

Nicanzil, Current Conductor is, unironcally, my favorite commander of the set. I LOVE explore as a mechanic, and a cheap legendary creature that turbocharge the mechanic is awesome. My only complain is that it's Simic and not Sultai, preventing me from running Lurking Chupacabra. Otherwise, load as much Explore as you can, grab some cards that provide evasion, such as Whispersilk Cloak or Herald of the Streams, add a bunch of landfall cards like Tatyova, Benthic Druid and Rampagning Baloth (With Path of Discovery for maximum value) and you got yourself a sweet explore deck.

Hakbal of the Surging Soul is also an explore commander, but this one cares about being Merkfolk typal first and foremost. Hakbal is very, very powerful, rapidly snowballing your merfolks into lethal threats with effects like Hardned Scales. The fact that it has an attack trigger on top of that really is the cherry on top, providing the classic combo of Ramp or card draw. Any number of merfolk token generation, such as Deeproot Waters, will make put Hakbal into overdrive, and make you the threat very quickly, so be ready to be a bit of an archenemy with this commander.

Xolatoyac, the Smiling Flood is first and foremost an adorable axolotl, and secondly, a powerful Simic Flash commander. A sort of DIY Wilderness Reclamation for any permanents, Xolatoyac allows you to spend your turn spending your mana to advance your board while still keeping mana up for responsiveness. Because it works with any counters, you can have fun rmping with Storage lands like Saprazzan Cove, or artifacts like Component Pouch, Coalition Relic, or Empowered Autogenerator. You can also add the Thirteenth Doctor to double up on untapping your creatures with counters.

Ellie and Alan, Paleontologists is a very cool and unique Bant commander, asking that you put creatures in your graveyard to get free value! This works with self-mill like Satyr Wayfinder or Mulch, with creatures with Cycling abilities to fill your graveyard at low rate, and exile those creatures to get free spells on top of the card advantage! I'd also recommend taking a look at Chakram Retriever, Which would allow you to have explosive discovery turns, and Misthollow Gryffin + Eternal Scourge, for cards you can exile multiple times.

Admiral Brass, Unsinkable is a new take on Pirate typal, throwing graveyard synergy in the mix with your evasive and disruptive threats. A free hasty 4/4 every turn, as long as you have a full bin, is no joke, and modt pirates tend to have disruptives ability attached to them, like Warkite Marauder or Hostage Taker, providing even more value. Grixis is probably the best color combo to fill your graveyard, between mill and looting effects such as Faithless Looting and Frantic Search. It's a more explosive pirate deck, compared to her previous incarnation, which wanted to play a more tempo-oriented deck.

Don Andres, the Renegade, is a new grixis Theft commander, in the line of Evelyn, the Covetous. Don Andres, however, is a lot more interested in smashing face with what you stole. +2/+2, Menace and Deathtouch is a serious buff, turning mostly inconsequential creatures into beatsticks. Getting free treasured of your Mind Siphon and Praetor's Grasp is also pretty good deal. Personally, I'd throw the Theft stapled such as Hostage Taker and Control Magic in with a few Threaten effects like Kari Zev's Expertise, and mass threathen like Mob Rule.

Indoraptor, the Perfect Hybrid is a sweet Jund Enrage/Combo commander that takes enough work to setup to avoid feeling oppressive. Starting at 1 toughness forces you to find a way to grant it Indestructible if you want to combo with Pestilence-like effects, but having Bloodthirst also allows you to play in a more fair, combat-oriented deck where the goal is to get a massive Indoraptor and simply trigger your enrage naturally through combat. I suspect Indestructible + Pestilence will be more popular, but a cheap aggressive Bloodthirst commander is also nice.

Huatli, Poet of Unity is a new Dinosaur commander for the set, but not the most exciting one. The front face is fairly lackluster, being simply a buffier Sylvan Ranger, but the Saga backside packs some real punch, with the disadvantage of being telegraphed miles in advance and being open to getting blown out by spot removal upon activation. What you get, however, is Ramp, the best dinosaur out of your deck, and a massive combat buff that should kill at least one player. The upside of being telegraphed is that, if you disrupt the natural progress through proliferate, or protect from mass removal with Teferi's Protection-like effects, you can really take the table by surprise and end the game.

Pantlaza, Sun-Favored is the second Dinosaur commander of the set, and frankly, he is frightening. I have a dislike for commanders that are just a massive pile of value with barely additional input, and slapping "Dinosaur" over it doesn't make it more palatable, but Pantlaza is the most powerful option for Naya Dinosaurs. Discover is an incredibly powerful mechanic, especially in a deck filled with threats and few reactive spells, Pantlaza also is incredibly resilient, as simply casting your commander after a board wipe will probably be enough rebuild thanks to the mana and card advantage of discover. I'm already tired of seeing it in Brawl on MTG Arena, and I don't expect to stop matching against it soon.

Wayta, Trainer Prodigy is a lot more in my wheelhouse. Synergizing with Enrage dinosaurs from original Ixalan like Trapjaw Tyrant and Needletooth Raptor, Wayta also diversify he menagerie by training Brash Taunters and Boros Reckoners. There's a lot of Non-Dinosaur creatures that have enrage-like abilities, and Wayta's 1 lone point of Power if perfect to trigger those without putting your creatures in harm's way. Acting as a repeatable removal spell on a stick, on top of doubling your triggers, is fantastic, and I 100% see myself building this deck.

Owen Grady, Raptor Trainer and Blue, Loyal Raptor are our first Temur Dinosaur commanders, replacing the most expandable color of Dinosaur (White) for blue (The color, not the raptor). There's not a lot of good blue Dinosaurs beside Nezahal, but Owen and Blue don't just want dinos, they want counters, and Simic is more than happy to oblige. Blue has a sizeable body, with a toolbox of abilities granted by Owen Grady that will be transfered to every subsequent dinos. It's not the best Dino commander, but it is on a unique color combination that leverages the additional strengths that Simic provides.

Tetzin, Gnome Champion is such an amazingly cool, but extremely narrow commander. Clearly designed for the Crafting mechanic, l also synergizes with the Transformers cards from Brother's War. The backside is very powerful, going wide with tokens while transforming artifacts like Azor's Gateway or Brass' Tunnel Grinder for a massive power boost, while backing your army of tokens with Intangible Virtue and Tempered Steel. There is a suprisingly high quantity of playable two-sided artifacts to go in that deck, though crafting with 6 artifacts is an hefty challenge of you don't build with tokens and self-mill in mind.

Xavier Sal, Infested Captain is a very exciting design, but suffers from the "Combo-By-Accident" problem, which will push the rest of the table to mercilessly destroy him and you in the process. While that happens, however, be sure to grab an Intruder Alarm and a Scurry Oak . There's some really cute cards like Chronozoa Watcher in the Water and Chitterspitter that work well with both sides, as well as basically any planeswalker that creates tokens like Tezzeret, Master Artificer, Ashiok, Nightmare Muse or Garruk, Cursed Huntsman. There's a lot of ways to build Sal, but be prepared to be seen as the obvious threat.

Henry Wu, InGen Geneticist is such an incredible flavor win that I'd want to build it for that reason alone. Mechanically, there's a lot of very interesting way to go. Human creatures that enter with non-human creatures (Such as Alirios, Enraptured), repeatable nonhuman token generators and Blink effects is an option. Building a fully nonhuman deck and loading up with existing Exploit cards to get double triggers off of your sacrifice is also very good. cards and mana are the most important ressources, and this provides you both on top of benefitting from sacrifice synergies. Very solid commander.

Indominus Rex, Alpha is a voltron commander in the vein of Rayami, First of the Fallen, except it requires only having creatures in hand except of killing creatures already in play, having synergy with Counter mechanics, and potentially refilling your hand instantly when it enters the battlefield as an untargeatable death machine. There's a lot of very powerful keywords that are easy to get in these colors, such as hexproof, flying or trample/deathtouch, as well as non-zero ways of getting Haste through cards like Akuta, Born of Ash of Clackbridge Troll. There is currently no creature in this color combination with Double Strike, but that may change in the future! Cards that make the Indominus Rex enter the battlefield with counters like Master Biomancer are also excellent synergy with the commander, getting a larger body and drawing more cards on ETB. And I have not mentionned how absurd Indominus is as a Dredge commander, both pitching your cards and drawing cards for dredging on a single body. Very versatile commander.

[thecommandertable]

Lost Caverns of Ixalan Artisan Set Review: Part 2

Find Part 1 here! Part 2 covers multicolor and artifact cards.

Multicolor

Akawalli takes the classic black-green self-mill strategy we see with commanders like Kagha and Uurg and adds a voltron twist. Expect to see Akwalli in creature-heavy decks with cards that can buff it equal to the number of creatures in the graveyard. Giving it menace once you're at Descend 8 makes it unblockable, so Criminal Past and Moodmark Painter are must-includes.

Bartolomé is a very powerful Magic card. They don't often give us free sacrifice outlets anymore. For white-black decks that want sac outlets, I expect this to be played alongside Viscera Seer, Fanatical Devotion, and Carrion Feeder.

Caparocti Sunborn looks like a sweet value card either in the 99 or in the command zone. It's large enough to attack someone and survive (usually) in the mid game; as the game goes longer you'll want to augment him with some sort of equipment (which you can tap to pay for his ability) so that you can continue attacking. I'll be adding Caparocti to my Commander Liara Portyr deck.

There have been a bevy of pirate creatures that make treasure tokens or care about artifacts: Malcolm, Keen-Eyed Navigator; Dargo, the Shipwrecker; Fathom Fleet Swordjack, etc., and there are some pirates that carry +1/+1 counters very well, provided you can get up to 10 permanents, which isn't hard with all the treasure: Slippery Scoundrel, Storm Fleet Sprinter, and Storm Fleet Swashbuckler.

As I said in Part 1, I find this card a little underwhelming as a commander. It's an excellent card in limited, don't get me wrong, but it doesn't support a dinosaur deck in the way you'd want a commander to. From a purely mechanical perspective, I'd prefer to have something like Ruby or Tuya leading my red-green dino deck. Itzquinth is pretty cute, though.

This card's very good. This card is I'm-thinking-about-putting-it-into-my-cEDH-deck good. It's part Grand Abolisher, part Toski. It'll find a place in nearly any green-white Artisan deck, but especially Hamza. It protects your board as you Overrun or cast a big Hunter's Insight! It draws you cards! *chef's kiss*

Alas, not every color pair received a legendary creature for its signpost uncommon. This card is very slow, and making it work is going to be a tall order, but gosh darn it, I'm going to try. I really want to build a golem assembly line.

At first blush Nicanzil looks sweet, but if you go look at all the common/uncommon creatures that explore, it gets a lot less exciting; they're all french vanilla beaters like Merfolk Branchwalker. The other explore payoffs, Wildgrowth Walker, and the new Twists and Turns, don't seem strong enough to make up for it.

Uchenbak looks pretty unwieldy. A 5-mana 6/4 vigilance menace commander makes for a serviceable (not good, but serviceable) beater, and you could try to lean into that with a quasi-voltron build with stuff like Strider Harness (getting to seven power is a big deal with voltron commanders). Getting eight permanent cards into your graveyard is no easy feat, however, and in return for doing so you get to recast your commander for only one mana cheaper than it would be from the commander tax.

I don't think Zoyowa is that great either. It having deathtouch is nice, but its second ability requires you to descend, which again, seems like a thing that's difficult to do every turn. Furthermore, giving your opponent the choice between discarding a card, sacrificing a permanent, or taking 3 damage means that they get to choose the least impactful thing- they'll hold onto their extra lands to discard, they'll sacrifice their treasure tokens, they'll take 3 when they have a high life total, etc. If Zoyowa is a card that you're excited about, I implore you to try Loyal Subordinate if you haven't already.

Artifacts

Some people have been comparing this to Solemn Simulacrum and frankly that comparison isn't flattering. If Solemn were downshifted (which I believe it should be) I would put it into some of my non-green Artisan decks, but not all of them. This card is significantly worse. Consider it this way: what percentage of Solemn's total value is constituted by that card draw? I'd argue that it's somewhere between 35-40%. How much of that is recouped by the extra point of power? Maybe... 5%, if we're being generous. (In 20-life formats, and particularly Limited, the difference between a 2/2 and a 3/2 is a lot bigger than in 40-life formats)

That said, Scampering Surveyor might find a home in some blink deck like Oji that really likes having a creature with that etb ability, or a Cave deck- at least, once we have a 5-color commander and probably another set's worth of Cave support.

---------------------------------

And that's all the cards I'm gonna talk about! Looking over them, the selection here feels a lot thinner than it was for Wilds of Eldraine. I'm not sure if that's because there are fewer interesting cards in the set for Artisan, or if it's because my bar for including them in the set review has risen. Time will tell.

[siempre-bucky]

Omg, where did you get your hangman shirt???

I got it from a shop on etsy called Akawe Designs! I also have their Rooster shirt! They're currently on vacation but hopefully they'll be back soon!

The also had Goose and Mav😄

[beardedbastardoutdoors]

Akawe Shield Tactical Knife

Presenting the Akawe Shield Knife, named after the Ojibwa word for shield. This knife is built for strength and reliability, making it perfect for tactical use and demanding outdoor activities. 1095 High Carbon Steel Blade: Delivers exceptional sharpness and durability, suitable for rigorous tasks. G10 Handles: Provide a secure and comfortable grip, ensuring precise control in all…

[caramelmochacrow]

jun7 is wag kang mag expect, tanga by fishie bishie. lol.

bc. bc!!!! ngumiti lang siya sa 'yo bumalik agad ang feelings mo, sinabi lang pangalan mo nahulog ka agad, gago. mabait lang siya oo, (oh) tangapin mo na, hindi na yan mag iiba. wag kang mag expect kase mag sasaktan ka lang, wag kang mag assume para hindi ka mag mukang tanga, wag kang mag expect kase mag sasaktan ka lang, wag kang mag assume tanga. di na nga maging kayo, isaksak sa kokote mo, imposible yan, kailangan mo nang dragon ball pito, imove on ka na diyan, pitohin mo sirili mo, akaw lang ang nagsasaktan, diba?

[chitpost]

too saturated Elvis Presley, you're welcome

credit: akaw