#aithusa's ep

[bee-birb]

[dont-let-me-eat-pears]

dude’s such a terrible liar it’s a wonder the whole of camelot didn’t know his secret by the end of the first episode.

[starrieisdelusional]

a long rambling/idea/rant of how i want bbc merlin plot to go

Season 1

General: stays the same (light-hearted season) but merlin starts to question gaius and kilgharrah, empathizes with morgana. Elyan is introduced somewhere between episodes. Gwen father didn’t die. Mordred ISN’T introduced yet. Morgana is gaslighted by merlin + gaius (not forever i swear guys)

Finale: merlin vs nimueh (epic battle this time), merlin is almost close to loosing but gaius helps him, however nimueh survives

Season 2

General: introduction of mordred on the second ep (merlin hates him), ep 1 is abt balinor (mentor figure for merlin + should meet with hunnith), arthur finds out abt ygraine (and yes merlin lied abt it) + starts questioning uther, we got more arthur’s pov when merlin is at the ‘tavern’ (episodes where merlin is not there and focuses on arthur instead), morgana finds out abt her magic. Freya + gwen romance plotline happened. Percival + Gwaine introduction, merthur kiss but they never acknowledge it (yep they’re in denial)

Finale: kilgharrah lost hope of merlin so he turns to nimueh (in a hidden scene nimueh told arthur the truth abt his birth), nimueh + uther battle (but nimueh lost NOO), balinor DIES, merlin stops kilgharrah, glimpse of morgause (at the ep end). Morgana made a decision to kill uther

Season 3

General: aithusa is born (morgana + kilgharrah + merlin really likes her), morgana villain arc (she finds out that merlin is gatekeeping magic from her + merlin trying to kill mordred lmao), either morgwen romance or gwencelot (i can’t choose), gwen’s father died, this season = gwen’s arc

Finale: magic reveal, uther’s death, morgouse + morgana attacked the castle, morgana and morgouse fighting + breaking of to their own path (morgana realizes morgause is kind of twisted evil)

Season 4

General: arthur banning merlin from camelot (merlin runaway arc), arthur + gwen + the knights running the kingdom, morgana redemption arc, morgouse + aggravaine becomes main villain, political shit in camelot (like other kingdom who also despises sorcery/power manipulation, an in-depth look of other kingdoms), GAIUS DIES, hunnith + aithusa + kilgharrah scenes, mordred + merlin + morgana bonding, ygraine scenes, arthur trying to forget merlin but CANT, oh and aggravaine is also a villain here but he actually has personality and pure evil, arthur getting excalibur, arthur is really struggling to find himself here (to be like his father or follows his heart). Btw merlin is there and it shows every time magic related enemies attacks camelot/everytime arthur is about to die really but he’s literally in the shadows now and arthur pretends not to notice

Finale: morgause + aggravaine attacking the kingdom, arthur accepts + forgiving merlin + morgana back and assign them as court sorceress + court physician, hunnith scenes, arthur tolerating magic, adopting mordred (apology for killing his father lol), probably adopting aithusa

Season 5

General: arthur lifts the ban against magic, marrying merlin, cendred is a villain here (however he is introduced in s4), merlin GETTING A STAFF (also introduced in previous seasons but he’s worthy of it here, arthur made it btw and it’s a power up for melrin)

Finale: morgause + cendred finale attack, a few deaths (they won thoe cuz this is the good ending)

End:

Camelot brings a new era (symbolizing change)

Arthur: King

Merlin: consort/court dragonlord with titles like “king arthur’s shadow”

Gwen: Court Advisor/head of the house

Morgana: Court Sorceress

Aithusa: Court Dragon

Why i think merthur should be canon:

1) they’re gay

2) real reason: so i think its good for the plot too since magic is a euphemism for gay, relates to the theme of arthur bringing change to camelot but other than marrying a servant, he marries a MALE servant who has magic ☺️🫶😘🙏

Series ends with everyone at the roundtable, gathering for a meeting

Okay that’s it let me know what you want to change 🥰

**This rambling is now updated, check it out here:

To find my other ramblings about this AU, filter with the hashtag #must we really rely on fate?

[nimrism]

could you make this post? please, it's so fascinating i really want to hear your thoughts on it

"The Dark Tower" Morgwen Interactions Analysis

i've literally been waiting for someone to ask me this so i can go all out in answer, so you're literally my favorite- THANK YOU! i've tried to put all the thoughts swirling around in my head into one coherent post, so strap in and let's LOOK AT THE IMPLICATIONS (from my perspective)!

first and most importantly, i want to zero in on morgana's choice of kidnapee; she could've chosen anyone in camelot, any one of the knigts who were regularly privy to arthur's battle plans and schedule, but nope. if we're looking at it from the perspective of "she needs the closest person to arthur" wouldn't that be merlin? she could have kidnapped and brainwashed him; he would've made for a fabulous inconspicious mole in the court, and arthur literally goes to him for anything and everything. i actually think it would make for a really interesting au/fic if it were merlin who was kidnapped instead of gwen (love confession/magic reveal possibilities are ENDLESS), but maybe it's a little too close to the plot of "a servant of two masters" and the writers didn't want to be repetitive. i'm going to be biased and delusional in believing that morgana did choose gwen, in particular, for more personal reasons as well as for her nefarious ones.

the way i see it (and this is obviously very objective), by the time we get to this point in s5, morgana is LONELY, like, has-no-one-in-the-world-except-aithusa type of lonely, and her choice of allies has been lacking diversity as of late (why are they all men 💀), AND they all end up dying anyway. so, she needs a plan, and she needs a trusted ally (she also needs a bit of love and lip balm cause DAMN). BUT the thing is, why would anyone be loyal to her? she's never kept any allies (or friends) thanks to her wit and charm alone, she's only ever kept men loyal to her by striking fear in their hearts. it's the same for her friends and family, i think. she doesn't believe they even tolerate her existence, so she needs to be crowned queen to subdue them and FORCE them to respect her. the same goes for gwen. she was only morgana's friend when morgana was a naive and vulnerable girl, plagued by nightmares and unexplained fears, and the second morgana grew out of them (or learned to control them) gwen stopped being affectionate, stopped being open. that's how morgana sees it, and it only reinforces her belief that gwen would never understand the person she's become now, she wouldn't quite see what morgana was trying to do. unless morgana forced her to.

the whole kidnapping affair was to MAKE gwen understand, because she wouldn't do it of her own free will. gwen would never willingly be on morgana's side, so she had to jump through a few morally questionable hoops to bring her over. in the end, i do believe all morgana really wanted was a friend (maybe a little bit more, amirite ladies), though by this point her concept of friendship had become twisted beyond recognition, and in all the chaos, this was the only way she thought she could have one. throughout the episode, a lot of the old morgana shines through, even if it is portrayed as just manipulation, and i do think that was her either slipping back into old habits or forcing herself to, for the sake of the brainwashing and for the sake of their friendship that she's trying to rekindle.

a point that i've seen several people make is that between the niceties, the "real" morgana peeks through several times throughout the ep, but i kinda disagree. i don't necessarily think that just because her smile drops, it means that the niceties were a facade and her "evil" side pops back out. i read the sudden change in expression more as disappointment. gwen fights back with such vigour that it's probably painful for morgana to realize that her former friend sees her as nothing more than an evil witch who's hell-bent on hurting her, now. she's disappointed that gwen, who was supposed to know her best, believes what the others do, and doesn't believe that morgana is being sincere in her offer of friendship.

a small remark i also have is: why wasn't morgana one of the visions/hallucinations gwen had in the dark tower? it's interesting to see that the closest three people to gwen are her brother, arthur, and merlin, of all people. i feel like gwen's history with morgana has to have had a lasting effect on both of them, even if morgana is supposed to be "evil" now. you don't stop loving someone just because they've chosen (or BEEN chosen by) the dark side. morgana was one of the people gwen cared about most in seasons 1 through 3 (s3 is pushing it a little, but still), it doesn't really make sense for it all to be forgotten so completely like we see in this episode. i also think it would've been super interesting to see a hallucination of younger morgana in particular, partially as a reminder that part of gwen still cares about morgana and largely because i'd like to see how gwen would react to that vision... would it differ from the other three? what would morgana do? would she sneer and laugh like elyan and arthur? would she do a little rawr like merlin (😭)? i feel like a ficlet is in order for this concept cause i would like to see it but i have to imagine it first (but that's the hard part 😭)

NOW ONTO THE MOST DELICIOUS PART OF THIS ANALYSIS: THE QUOTES

M: "Would you prefer some chicken?"

i just found this one hilarious tbh like she's so out of pocket what are you doing offering your kidnapee some chicken and WHAT WAS THE OTHER OPTION, IF NOT CHICKEN?

M: "I know how lonely you must be, all by yourself in that room. At least you're not shackled, and there's daylight. You can move, you can see."

oof. she's obviously referring to her own capture and torture, pulling from her own experience. it's heartwrenching that morgana has been through all of this, traumatised beyond reason, but it's even more heartwrenching that she thinks she's doing gwen a service, like this. it might not seem like that to any sane person, but after everything she's been through, morgana's worldview is completely different. in her mind, however twisted and detached it has become, she's being merciful to gwen this way, giving her luxuries that she was never afforded when she was captured. (including a warm meal with chicken at miss havisham's table 🤩)

M: "I too have suffered, Gwen. I spent two years living in darkness. I spent two years chained to a wall at the bottom of a pit... You did not know."

goddddd this line... it's just so painful, so powerful, so indicative of SO MANY THINGS. it's EVERYTHING. every acting choice katie and angel made in this scene was brilliant but ESPECIALLY their facial expressions in this particular part WOAH. the way morgana's voice cracks on the word "pit" is DEVASTATING. i was floored. the way gwen's face falls as she processes her words and they properly set in... INCREDIBLE. the concern in gwen's eyes is palpable as she realizes the horrors inflicted on her friend. and the final "you did not know" was so, so powerful. morgana realizes that gwen didn't know about and clearly wasn't okay with what she went through. gwen had no part in it. morgana SMILES at gwen's reaction, but instead of it being a smile of malice or evil it's one of RELIEF, and one that she hides very promptly. she's reassured in the knowledge that gwen had no idea she had suffered so immensely, and that, more importantly, she wasn't involved in it. it's SO important to note that morgana has no idea whether arthur had a hand in her own torture or not. it's especially not a good look on him that he invites the sarrum as a friend of camelot so soon after the events of "the dark tower", so, as far as morgana knows, he could've been a "friend" when she was being tortured for years, too. i wonder what would've happened if morgana had kidnapped gwen AFTER the sarrum's visit to camelot... i feel like that would have complicated things with gwen much further, if morgana thought she was complicit in her imprisonment.

M: "I would have sold my soul for someone to show me kindness such as this."

only two points on this heartbreaking line: 1- FUCK the sarrum of amata. all my homies HATE the sarrum. s4 and s5 morgana might both be textbook cases of "evil", but they're two VERY different people with two very different worldviews and tactics. morgana's imprisonment turned her into the cold husk of a person she is by s5. and 2- this just further confirms that morgana thinks she's doing gwen a favor, dining with her and letting sunlight into her room and choosing not to tie her up etc.

M: "Your hands are cold... I have a warm fire going for you."

oh boy is this a MOMENT. the way morgana keeps her hand held out. the way gwen reluctantly puts her hand in hers (MORGWEN HAND-HOLD!) *ivy by taylor swift starts playing out of nowhere* {ohhhhh goddamn, my pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand, taking mine, but it's been promised to another, ohhh}

um anyway i digressed. then the way gwen wriggles her hand out of morgana's grasp, while morgana grips her fingers with unwavering determination... it's just delicious.

M: "Anything you want, you can have. I'll give it to you."

idk about you but personally i'm SOLD. take all my money. i read this as morgana trying her utmost best to sell gwen on joining her, but i can also see the manipulation laced in it.

G: "Why are you doing this?"

M: "Because we're friends. We always were."

to me, this reinforces the theory that morgana's just trying to get her friend back on her side. by stating that they've always been friends, morgana reaffirms their friendship as much to herself as to gwen. she was her friend once, and she can be again.

M: "I'm helping you. I'm looking after you."

this sort of feels like morgana is telling herself that, more than she's telling gwen. maybe it's just part of the manipulation process, but i do believe that this was morgana's conscience reassuring her that what she's doing is in gwen's favor and that she's being kind to her.

M: "It's alright, I'm here."

UGH this line. morgana is being the person she needed when she was imprisoned. this scene is also a parallel to all the times morgana woke up screaming in the middle of the night and gwen was there to comfort her in s1/2. this time the tables have turned and it's morgana comforting gwen. simply delicious.

M: "My darling, I was wrong to make you suffer."

TEA! to say that this line was spoken from the bottom of morgana's heart might just be a bit too delusional, but i like to think there's at least some truth to it. torturing gwen had a lot of paralells to morgana's own imprisonment and torture, and she did want to make her suffer, at least in the beginning. but it was also different from what morgana went through. this is NOT to justify torture, btw, torture is BAD, but her "manipulation" tactics got a bit too personal at some point, and i like to think at least a part of it was genuine.

G: "No. Whatever twisted game you're playing, I want no part in it. I would rather stay here and die."

ouch. gwen's resistance to the last possible minute shows such strength on her part (cause me? i would've given in before she even dragged me through the desert tbh) and it gave us such a delicious performance from angel; the reluctance? the uncertainty? the distrust? the relief that morgana is there but also the FEAR of what she's doing? the contradiction between the morgana that gwen once knew and the morgana that everyone KNOWS is evil? but the morgana that gwen once knew is shining through now, and she's saying everything gwen wants to hear... grade-A angst.

IN CONCLUSION they're gfs your honor, this was all just a plot to snatch gwen back from arthur cause morgana didn't think seducing her herself would work. (this phrase could be in reference to this ep or the "lancelot du lac" ep i'm cackling morgana really is hopeless) there are also SEVERAL psychological layers to it, but describing it this way is just easier.

SO... this is possibly the longest post i've ever made. it got a little more comprehensive than i originally thought it would be, but THERE YOU HAVE IT! that's my take on the morgwen interactions in the dark tower. if i seem a little biased, that's because i 100% am :) i hope that clears things up. this is an open invitation to keep sending me asks (even if it's about the most random things ever) cause i love them and i love every single person who sends in an ask, and a public apology for how long these answers get sometimes ��

[the-king-and-the-druidess]

Point to the "Morgause enchanted Morgana" theory: Arthur and Merlin are talking about "what made her so twisted" in the very Dark Tower episode, making the ep's plot a non-direct answer to this question. What was it?

And the core of the enchantment is not the Tower, the building itself but the mandrake and psychological suffering it causes. Who else used hexing with mandrakes? Morgause. Uther felt something like Gwen because of the root.

Other points supporting the theory: very drastic shift in Morgana's perception of her friends she loved before. Betrayal of her compassion for Camelot commoners. Changed mannerism: smirks, falsity, coldheartedness (Gwen started acting like Morgana when mandraked). The way mandraked!Gwen interacted with Morgana is basically the way Morgana interacted with Morgause in S3. Fact that Morgana became too obsessed with the goals Morgause gave her even when it was not important (Gwen's marriage). Mandraked people can feel too, we see Gwen hurting and going away when Sarrum told how he tortured Morgana and Aithusa, we see her remembering her good moments with Arthur. From Morgause's side, using the mandrake on Morgana would not be considered something evil, but just a little help for her lost younger sister; she had already used Morgana without her knowledge.

Contrapoints: Morgana has been experiencing emotional suffering and fear before 2.12 and Morgause. Poisoning became the last straw. She already was planning to do something with Uther and his regime, she was suppressing her rage at his injustice. Separation from Arthur and friends, Morgause's teachings and later, Uther's betrayal(when he rejected her as his daughter) tore apart bonds Morgana had with them, she began seeing them as her enemies siding with her biggest enemy. She was broken because no one, including Merlin, never showed her other way. Morgause sculpted a revolutionary out of clay which has already begun to shape itself. Also, wouldn't the root charm have broken after Morgause's death? It's a blind spot of the mandrake sorcery. Or maybe only love, light and will to return to innocence of the mandraked person can break the enchantment?

On the other hand at that moment the camera shifts on Merlin after Arthur asked the question, hinting at Merlin's role in poisoning Morgana. Most of the time I think that emotional torture Gwen experienced there: fear, misery, darkness, thoughts that everyone hates her etc Morgana experienced on her own, maybe with a little non-magical push from Morgause, and this twisted her. What Gwen experienced once, Morgana experienced many times, plus Gwen always had a softer and kinder nature so in order to change her one had to use an enchantment. (Yes, it implies a very black and white good vs evil).

But I believe the theory can coexist with the most obvious explanation.

[onceandfutureheartache]

soft moment from the aithusa ep (rip to the quality, damn dark dungeons)

[camelotsheart]

So a few people have been asking about the doc I've been compiling regarding evidence for the changed BBC Merlin season 4 theory, so I've decided to link it here. The document is still in draft form and constantly being added to, so my apologies if it's just a pile of brain-spill. The notes and my explanation of the possible reordering of episodes at the end of the table might make it a bit easier to understand. Maybe. 🙈

As a short summary - @percyjacksonfan3 and I have been talking about how the many inconsistencies in season 4, both in canon and deleted scenes, seem to hint at a sudden change in plot during or prior to production (e.g. arthur's constantly changing view of magic, the role of aithusa in Merlin and Arthur's destiny, the many unfulfilled hints of a magic reveal), and this document is just a compilation of all the ideas we've had, and how I think the season might have originally been structured. Thank you to @a-confused-contradictory-mess for your contributions as well!

[ladyofthelake]

Gotta decide on what Merlin ep I’m gonna watch for Christmas Eve. I usually choose Aithusa but I think I might go for the perfection that is A Servant of Two Masters <3

[sourdough-morbread]

Morgana 👀

ok so i know you left this ask ages ago and this is like so fucking long i am so sorry.

but i just... i have a lot of thoughts on morgana. *hides pages of notes made for two big morgana-centric WIPs*

First impression: this is what went through my mind in my first watch through

s1: i fell for morgana really quickly. i was like. YES she has MAGIC and she tells off uther and arthur. 

s2: i still liked her but i getting concerned about the direction the writers were pulling her character in season 2. i was quite disappointed in the way her turn to evil was written. like she was good then barely on screen and very damsel-in-distressy for some reason. and then she became evil!morgana with zero explanation and zero reluctance. didnt really make sense to me.

s3: i enjoyed her as a villain in, but at that point she was a completely different character in my eyes. not in the old character new instalment but in a entirely different person was put inside her. 

s4: she was so boring and one dimetional. just. meh. she barely felt like a threat.. 

s5: i wasnt even paying attention to her.  she has become the random conflict generator the writers rather than a character. so i just didnt care. also i skipped a few eps in my first go so. like dark tower bc i didnt want to see gwen hurt. so i missed out on the emotional impact of that.

Impression now: after rewatching i can see her character arc a lot better. i still think her arc wasnt well done. but thats because the execution was lacking, rather than the trajectory of her character not making sense. because it actually makes a lot of sense.

like in season 1, she is basically immune. she is caught aiding mordred and yet she can get away with uther yelling at her and have it all be forgotten with an apology. meanwhile tom is executed for being seen with a sorcerer. when she wants to kill uther, i dont think she thinks she will be caught. nobody would ever dare accuse morgana and arthur would never suspect it. 

then she discovers she has magic herself and all of that immunity is gone. and without that safety net she becomes willing to endanger so many people, including the allies of magic in camelot. you know, people she would be screaming at the defence of previously.  

her in 1x10 is a small glimpse of what she could have been. a force for good. someone willing to actually fight against what uther and rulers like him were doing. and i would have loved to see that. 

but thats not what the writers chose. instead she regains her footing in hatred and blaming everyone for the fear she felt of death and disgust she felt of herself once she became one of those she defended but saw as beneath her none the less. 

and i will never not be salty about how they skipped over her turning evil and how flat she became. like. let me have a deeply evil terrifying witch damn it! 

i think what makes her terrifying is that she doesnt want power. not really. she wants revenge. she wants to take everything arthur cares about. she wants the throne because arthur doesn't get to have it. she wants camelot to kill its people. she doesnt care about power beyond how much pain she can cause with it. and thats so terrifying. enemy with no goal but to cause you pain. and knows all your weaknesses and can fool the people you have wronged to think she is fighting for their salvation. how do you even fight that? 

idk i just think it was underutilised. again she was just a conflict generator the writers used until the final battle. even then mordred was more significant than morgana. 

Favorite moment: just her in the entirety of beginning of the end. if i had to pick one moment it would be her goading arthur to look behind the curtain. its just so good.

Idea for a story: again... the WIPs. but one i havent written yet.

i had one au where arthur found out about her magic on accident and like. it kicked off a whole plot of her learning magic, and arthur finally facing how terrible uther is and getting his shit together. its not a very detailed idea. morgause would probably use this opportunity to manipulate arhtur. agravain would proably be not evil, tho still a spineless slimy noble. idk.

Unpopular opinion: this is not going to be a surprise to people who know me, but i dislike pretty much all of the discussion ive seen about 2x03. 

fandom seems to be stuck on this dichotomy of either merlin should have told her about his magic and by not doing so he betrayed her— he did not. merlin tried to help her at the risk of his own life. go watch 2x03 again. or merlin reacted perfectly— also he did not. even while helping her, he still refused to acknowledge her magic.

in a situation where something invisible about you can get you killed, subtle word choices matter. merlins words, him continuing to say he wouldn't know if it was magic, even though they both knew it was and that the other also knew, means something. it means i will keep your secret but i cannot help you. this is by no means a moral failing of merlin. he made this choice out of fear for his own life, and i think it is unreasonable to expect him to react perfectly.

morgana in turn had no reason to go to merlin again about her magic. he has made it clear he doest want to be involved, which he has no responsibility to. and why would merlin be able to help her? he, as far as she knows, has no personal experience with magic except his sorcerer friend. 

besides, druids were the safest place for a her to be. it was the safest place for any warlock to be, including merlin.  her knowing or not knowing about merlin has nothing to do with it. like. everything that happens in camelot between merlin and morgana in season 2 is perfectly understandable. they didnt wrong each other. 

what merlin and morgana actually did wrong is getting all those druids killed because they didnt think the plan through. like all of those people in that camp died. aglain, the person helping morgana, died right in front of her and mordred. the druids were the only ones wronged in that situation. which i have never seen pointed out. 

Favorite relationship: her and mordred

listen there is only a singular instance of morgana genuinely hesitating to hurt somebody after her turn and that person is mordred.

Favorite headcanon: oracle!morgana. this is like a whole big headcanon thats basically the origin story of how draognlords came to be. something happened and oracles stole dragons wills and their births to give to mortals as punishment. and then a group of these people came to albion and became the Seers and the dragonlords. who have like different traditions to the druid seers and the priestesses who use methods adapted from scry methods.

thats why she can speak with aithusa even though aithusa cant speak. 

[coinofstone]

5x12 The Diamond of the Day pt 1

Final two episodes! Big finale! Why am I making myself cry in the middle of the afternoon! Both eps in this post.

I do love that they made Arthur a sore loser

Enter treacherous white woman #2. Srsly it was lazy writing when they did it for Mordred, it's worse now with Gwaine.

I do love the actual Round Table war room discussion but a) why isn't Merlin seated at the round table and b) why does Leon have so much goddamn faith in Camelot's walls? Like??? You literally said the same thing last year and yet Camelot *did* fall when Agravaine brought an army through the tunnels!

Poor Aithusa. Kid's had a rough life.

I do love Arthur responding to Merlin presenting him with all his supplies ready - which he prepared without his magic mind you - with suspicion 😂

But then he calls Merlin a coward and it's sad

Katie has such a great voice. That entire thing in the cave from her taunting to her laughter to the spell, it just just beautifully played.

Whole ass battle to prepare for and Arthur is just walking around moping cuz Merlin isn't there

So, Merlin's father-vision telling him he's magic itself and he just needs to believe in himself to get his magic going again, does this mean he *didn't* need to go to the cave to get it back? Cuz it seems like he needed to recharge in the cave itself, his injuries were healed when he woke up. That seems like magic cave stuff to me.

Also that "always have been and always will be" - I'm taking to mean 'always have been' in the sense that since he's 'magic itself' even before he was born, his magic existed in other, intangible forms, like we are all stardust etc. But now that he is, he will always be, aka he will not die.

Arthur waking up with his wife in his arms and Merlin's name on his lips, jumping out of bed to act on dream-info.

Balinor telling Merlin to trust in what will be.... like bitch that is literally not how this ends.

5x13 The Diamond of the day pt 2

You know that gif of the cat knocking everything off the table? That's literally Merlin shooting lightning at everyone from his perch on the ridge.

I have a lot of snarky things to say about Merlin coming out of the cave in full Dragoon gear and riding a horse instead of teleporting like the other witches but I'ma keep that to myself.

Mordred is a bitch and Aithusa has terrible aim. At least Aithusa's loyalty to Morgana makes sense.

Arthur said oh shit I'm magic - oh wait no it's that old man again

He also straight up "No! Bad dragon!"-ed Aithusa

Y'know, for all I've watched this episode and screamed about Arthur's death, I don't think I've ever focused on the exact moment he gets stabbed before.

Mordred catches him from behind and he meets it, no fault there. But as soon as he realizes his assailant is the knight who turned on him and joined Morgana, what does he do? HE LOWERS HIS FUCKING SWORD

He leaves himself wide fucking open and vulnerable and Mordred seizes the opportunity. I understand wanting the moment of recognition for Arthur, but on what planet is a trained warrior going to drop his sword mid-attack because he recognizes his attacker as a dude who only just recently decided to forsake him? It's soooooo dumb

There was a whole sequence a few episodes back where Mordred and Arthur are sparring, the point of it was to show that Mordred has become a skilled swordsman. So what exactly was the point in having Mordred run Arthur through as soon as Arthur idiotically lets his guard down? This should've been a meticulously choreographed sword fight, with Mordred getting the upper hand and sticking Arthur properly. Not this nonsense. Look at Arthur's FACE! Oh, Mordred... 👉👈 do you maybe wanna be friends again- STAB ... guess not

Uther's been rolling in his grave but he's taking an extra tumble watching Arthur forget all his skills and training in that moment.

I do appreciate Arthur getting Mordred back though. Like that moment of merciless anger followed by the hurt and regret playing on Arthur's face, warring with surety and responsibility. It was good.

I've rewatched the big confession scene about 16 times just now.

I don't quite understand why Merlin took Arthur to the woods to begin with. Instead of bringing him to the med tent in the battlefield or back to Camelot. What was the reason?

Merlin saying it feels strange (to use magic freely in front of Arthur) and him just going 'yeah' completely deadpan makes me laugh every time.

I really feel like Arthur's head should be elevated at a further incline if he's going to be fed.

Gaius refusing to outright expose Merlin as the sorcerer but nonetheless letting Gwen figure it out on her own warms my heart.

My God Arthur is sitting there dying, feeling betrayed about his best friend 'lying' to him, and still he can't stop himself from looking at Merlin's mouth.

Percival summoned MUSCLE POWER

Hey um random but why does Gwaine even know where Merlin and Arthur are headed? Why would Gaius tell him?

Arthur looks at Merlin so lovingly after he's killed Morgana 😭😭

And now he's literally grabbing at the man's hand 😭 "just hold me, please"

That's gotta be the gayest death scene in television history. If you can watch that without thinking Arthur puts his hand on the back of Merlin's head because some part of him wants to bring him down for a kiss, or that "just hold me, please" is in any way shape or form a 'bros' thing, and certainly not at all an intentional mirror/callback to Isolde dying in Tristan's arms, then I'm afraid you are what we professionals refer to as a dumb-as-nails fucknugget, more commonly phrased as 'willfully ignorant'.

"All that you have dreamt of building has come to pass" yeah except for the whole, y'know, magic still being illegal thing.

I've said this before, but, while I'm sure there was a determined intention to have Arthur die in his armor, probably in some kind of attempt to make sure the audience knows he's died a warrior's death, I *really* think it was kinda stupid that Merlin never removed it, despite Arthur being weak, despite the fact that there was something like five days between him getting stabbed and him actually dying, despite that for the duration of that time they were traveling or hiding out. Merlin managed to produce a cloak to put on Arthur, why did he need the full armor on that whole time? Like even if they left the chainmail on, those plates on his shoulder were just getting in the way, and it looked quite uncomfortable.

Also not for nothing but Lancelot got like, every flower in the forest surrounding lush verdant greens in his death boat, Arthur gets a bunch of sticks.

It suddenly occurs to me, watching this now, that the reason Leon/Percival is such a common side pairing in Merthur fics, is because these two motherfuckers are the only original Knights of the Round Table to survive the series. 🤦‍♀️ I dunno how I failed to notice that before now. My stupidity amazes me.

I'm *really* glad they decided to do this scene with Gwen wearing the Pendragon red dress instead of the black mourning dress. Yes she looks fabulous in it but it's more the symbolism than the 'reality' - with Gwen wearing her house's colors it represents a continuation rather than a finality. Camelot will go on, Gwen will undoubtedly end the war on magic and with Morgana dead (and frankly, I think by now she already brought about the death of all the angry incel type rulers in Albion) there stands to reason her reign will begin with a period of peace, possibly longer than Arthur's. We kind of have to assume that the 'time the poets speak of' is, inevitably, Gwen's reign - which only came about through Arthur's death. It's a little bit toooo subtle in my opinion, but at the same time, I understand the need for the focus on Merlin and Arthur - after all, this show was their journey - not leaving much time to focus on Gwen and Camelot in the aftermath of Arthur's death.

I will just say, the first time I watched this that fucking truck scared the ever living shit out of me. I also just immediately, viscerally hated that scene and declared it invalid - but I think it was because the truck made me jump out of my skin. It has since grown on me, particularly once I started reading 'Arthur Returns' fic.

Everything beyond this point is post-series spec and headcanon, so if that's not your jam you can exit safe in the knowledge that as usual, if there's anything worth commenting on in the S5 extras, I will create a separate post!

For those interested, my go-to post-series fic is We Begin Again by katherynefromphilly I fully headcanon this series as the continuation of the series.

I have a lot of thoughts about Gwen and Merlin post-Camlann.

For one, poor fucking Gwen. She's lost her father, her brother, and her husband, all by what, age 30? That's rough. And who knows what happened to her mom, that was pre-series and I don't think it was ever mentioned.

Merlin, dear god poor Merlin. First of all, I just wanna say straight off that my instinctive headcanon about Merlin was that he never returned to Camelot. I couldn't really say why exactly. I just don't think he could stand being there after Arthur's death. But practically speaking, Merlin's still got Aithusa to deal with, that dragon needs some godsdamned house training asap. He's still the last Dragonlord, it's reasonable to assume he'd immediately take that on considering Aithusa is partially responsible for Arthur's death (the sword Mordred killed Arthur with, only succeeded in killing Arthur because it had been forged in Aithusa's fire-breath) so he's either going to attempt to train the bad behaviors out of Aithusa, or...well...

The only thing is, I do not believe Merlin would abandon Gwen, or Gaius. So my hc is inherently flawed. I do think Merlin probably spend a couple months with his mum, and I do think he ultimately settled near lake Avalon waiting for Arthur's return.

But I do wonder, what must their relationship have been like? Gwen, surely, would've sought his guidance in establishing laws governing the use of magic. And surely, peace cannot last indefinitely, so Merlin absolutely would've defended Camelot and protected Gwen. There's just no way he could've completely turned his back on them, but I doubt he could bear living in Camelot. And Gwen is both strong and practical enough to get on without him there 24/7, even though I'm sure she'd miss him.

I also think she would've found love again. Whether with Leon, as many people hc, or someone else not in the series.

ANYWAY.

Thanks to everyone who came on this journey with me. I will post comments on the extras if I have anything worth saying - and I think I'll do a master post linking all these episode posts after I clean them up once I get time to sit at a computer and do so. Until then! 💙💚

(Gif source) (h/t @shut-up-merlin)

[dont-let-me-eat-pears]

watching the knights of the round table come together in “the coming of arthur” like

my boys 😍

[starrieisdelusional]

episode dedicated to banished!merlin and seperated!morgana in s4 from my fix it au

warning: this is LONG

a bit background: there’s a year and a half timeskip between s3 finale and this ep.

merlin had been training, and getting closer to his roots (studying magic, becoming one with nature, etc etc, no he didn’t go back to ealdor) all the while protecting camelot from the shadows (yes arthur had been getting into a few troubles now and then and merlin had always been there, but never really appearing in front of his face, arthur knows but never really comments about it, settles for ignoring him)

meanwhile after a few months after the s3 finale (morgana and morgouse attacked camelot) morgana finally had a huge fight with her sister and they go on their own ways. So now morgana is alone, doesn’t really know what to do since she killed uther, but doesn’t want to obliterated camelot either

So during season 3 aithusa was born and shes been helping merlin and morgana there and then, there’s also mordred. Oh and merlin’s magic is public information at this point

*

actual ep:

episode starts off with morgana, tending to her cottage. She lives in the middle of the woods, in the middle of no where. She’s trully alone now, after the fight with morgause. She regretted it a little. Maybe her sister is right, maybe bringing camelot to total destruction and crowning her queen is the best course of action.

But morgana didn’t want that. She just wants uther’s reign to end. It’s not her place now to rule camelot, there’s really no benefit in killing everyone either. Although there really is no change, arthur is still banning magic…

Morgana puts down her firewood with a bit too much force. Truth is morgause is right. Magic is still banned in the land, even in Arthur’s reign. And morgana is scared. She isn’t ready to kill her brother, she isn’t ready to kill the girl who’s there for her each night, every time she’s confused of her nightmares, or the citizens that gave her flowers. Morgana remembers uther’s look of despair and confusion, she feels her hand trembles

Morgause: (in a flashback) You’re nothing but a coward Morgana! A coward!

No matter, she’s not part of it anymore, it’s better to leave it alone. Let morgause finish their revenge.

When morgana leaves to wash her cauldron, it feels weird. It felt like she’s being watched. She scanned the woods with her magic, she didn’t feel anything. That’s really strange, morgana must be…

.

.

.

The first thing morgana sees is the stone floor. Her head is splitting, her vision is unfocused. Morgana sits up slowly, trying to regain balance.

The room is dark, she can barely see anything. When she tries to move her hair, she realizes that she’s chained to the wall

Great. She’s kidnapped.

She scowls, trying to free herself from the chains. She tries to draw her magic, but she feels nothing. Whoever kidnapped her knows what they’re dealing with…

She hears a groan from her left and she saw a man. Wearing god knows what. Laying on the floor, chained like she is. She calls for him, trying to wake him up. The more she looks at him, the more she felt like she knew this man.

???: where am i… Morgana: (realize who this is) Merlin??? Merlin: …morgana…?

The man looked at her, no longer the merlin she last seen. He looks like a stray being, as if he’s the spirit of the forest. He is covered in cloth, a cloak on his head. His skin peaks out from where the cloth didn’t touch him, even in the dark, morgana can see the light bouncing off his slender thighs and the faint outline of his….nipple

Morgana: you look like a prostitute… Merlin: that's rich from someone who dress like a beggar Morgana: I’ll have you know this is one of the finest dresses i have- Merlin: Your hair could really do some work Morgana: you don't get to say that when you don't need to maintain your hair every day!!

They bicker back and forth about their fashion choices. Morgana also hates his serving clothes, especially that tattered neckerchief on his neck…And he barely changes everything. It’s a boring to look at every single day. At least Gwen changes her clothes once in a while.

It was so heated they didn’t notice the door opening until they heard footsteps entering the room. They eye their predator carefully, backing themselves to the wall. But the guards only un-cuffs them from the wall, forcing them to stand.

They were bringing into a room, full of people with chains on their hands. Morgana stands close to Merlin, maybe Morgana can kill him when he wasn’t looking, morgana HATES him after all…

The ringleader came into view, told them to fight to the death. Anyone who succeed can go to the second round or something morgana wasn’t really listening. She’s too busy to think of ways of killing Merlin.

They put a bunch of weapon in the middle of the room, probably to aid them or something. Morgana grabs a sword just in case. Merlin didn’t grab anything. What an idiot.

Ringleader: The battle starts….now

It was a blur after that. Morgana remembers slaying people, people who aren’t merlin. Morgana tries to cast a spell towards him every now and then, she saw Merlin doing the same. But it was never strong enough to kill, probably too distracted by the threat in front of them.

It suddenly stops. Only Morgana and a few other people stands unscathed, including Merlin, always Merlin. It makes a lot of sense now why he has a habit of not dying. Morgana remembers when she discovers that he has magic. What a hypocrite.

They were thrown to their prison cells not long after. After a speech that morgana really didn’t bother to listen

(in their cell)

Merlin: You have any idea what they want? (body swelling with blood and bruises) Morgana: we’re stuck in a slavery ring

Morgana seen one back when she was still with morgause. She tracks them down when one crosses her path, a potential army for her. She remembers that one of those rings would pit off prisoners like this, probably to find new slaves

Morgana: I couldn’t wait to see your demise when one of those brutes mortally wound you…” (giggling, imagining Merlin suffering a slow and painful death) Merlin: (shakes his head) look morgana…i’m sorry alright? I didn’t mean to betray you like that, and i… Morgana: i don’t want to hear your excuses you liar! You’re the same as that old fool! (screaming)

morgana wish she can slit his throat right now. Morgana wants to stab her dagger, revenge for every time Gaius told her she doesn’t have magic, for every time merlin stay quiet

Merlin: well i’m sorry for being a liar when i’m constantly threatened to be executed! At least you don’t get to suffer any consequences!! Morgana: you don’t get to say that!! You meddle into things when you don’t need to!!

they scream to each-other faces. Spit and all. It’s a bit disgusting, but Merlin is more disgusting. And every time she hears his excuses it brings something ugly within her. When Morgana was about to throw another insult at his face the door opens harshly

Guard: Quiet before I snap your necks (throwing a piece of bread and then leaving) Morgana: …at least i’m not an idiot in love like you Merlin: what do you mean? Morgana: (snorts) you spent every single day protecting arthur from harm, you took poisons and blows for arthur, you poisoned me because i’m hurting arthur, you hunt a child like a pig because of some wishy-washy prophecy, a child merlin, a child! Merlin: … Morgana: how’s arthur? was he sad that i killed his daddy??

it didn’t go unnoticed that Merlin was silent at the mention of his brother. Which was weird, usually when she brought him up he never shut up about him.

Merlin: (gets the bread, tossing it to Morgana with his bound hand) eat up, tomorrow is going to be a rough day Morgana: I don’t want food from you (tosses it back to him with gnawing stomach) it’s probably poisoned anyways Merlin: (sighs) if i ate it and i didn’t die, would you eat it? Morgana: ….no

merlin shrugs, biting a bit of his bread. When he shows no indication of poisoning, he tosses it back to her

Merlin: See? No poison Morgana: (rolled her eyes, grumpily tossing the bread back to him) i don’t trust you until you finished it

they toss the bread back and forth, biting into it until there’s no more food left to toss. After another stupid remark, Morgana greets him goodnight, and sleep on her side of the cell

It became a routine after that, they were toss at the arena, got toss back in the cell, tossed back at the arena….

Morgana hates it when she spends time with him. She’s sick of Merlin’s wicked humor. When he managed to rung a laugh out of her. For the first time since Morgause she feels like she’s not alone anymore

Merlin: …and then I told him that it was a sidhe, but he didn’t believe me! Morgana: Well he’s stupid, the stupidest man i’ve ever known…

Morgana didn’t enjoy talking to him, she hates it, she’s sick of the joy crawling on her skin

Morgana: What about Gwen? Merlin: Gwen? Oh she’s fine, she’s sad when you’re gone that time, we couldn’t really comfort her, it’s the same with arthur…it’s the same with everyone really…we miss you Merlin: …and what about you? What of you and arthur? Merlin: … Morgana: Oh come on merlin! There must be something that you did right? It’s been what? A year since that kiss? I saw it you know. Surely you already did something?? Are you still Arthur’s manservant? i don’t know how you handle that magic though…are you still keeping secrets from him? Why are you here anyways? Is arthur here with you? Merlin: Arthur banished me Morgana: Sorry? Merlin: I’m banished from camelot...

Morgana didn’t know what to feel. She should be happy, merlin is banished from camelot! That’s what she wanted right? For Merlin to suffer?

Merlin: it’s fine though, I learned a lot, did you know the druids grows the best of fruits? Must be their connection with nature or something. Their grapes are divine-

Morgana couldn’t stop the ire rising from herself when she kicks him. Merlin immediately bends to touch his leg

Merlin: WHAT WAS THAT FOR?! Morgana: YOU’RE AN IDIOT MERLIN SON OF HUNNITH! Wow i know you’re an idiot but i can’t believe you’re THAT BIG of an idiot Merlin: What???? Morgana what are you even- Morgana: Should i chop Arthur’s manhood for what he did to you? Gosh, you’re probably still protecting camelot even in banishment aren’t you??? I know that’s you when morgouse sends the hydra on the castle….are you an IDIOT??? Why are you still chasing this guy?? I can’t even…i get that he’s hot, but really merlin? Why did you get banished anyway? was it the magic?? Or is he hates homosexual relationship? It’s the magic isn’t it…that bastard….

Morgana swears when she gets out, she will kill him, even with her own two hands-

Merlin: stop it morgana, i don’t want you to kill arthur! Morgana: Of course you’re going to say that! you lovesick fool! Merlin: Really? Do you want me to kill gwen because she stabbed you that one time?!

Morgana shuts up, merlin must be referring to that time when gwen is forced to stab her when she reigns the castle with morgause, she doesn’t like thinking about it

Morgana: (huffed) he shouldn’t banish you, not when you’re always by his side, and what do you get?

it’s stuff like this that made her truly hate camelot. Morgana could understand her banishment, but to banish merlin? Why didn’t anyone do anything? It truly made morgana sick to her stomach

Merlin: you know, banishment isn’t that bad…and i made choices…I deserved it

Before morgana can reply a guard enters their room, uncuffing them and dragging them outside their cell. They arrived at a different room, like that of an arena. But smaller this time. But only morgana and merlin stand in the middle of the room. The ringleader stands on a balcony

What happened on the last arena again? Right, only merlin and morgana were left standing, which means…

Ringleader: Merlin and Lady Morgana, once the pride and joy of Camelot, only to be banished by King Arthur himself. What a pity Merlin: If you think that I’m willing to help you to destroy camelot, count me out. My loyalties will always lie on king arthur Ringleader: Oh no no, I don’t want any of that. I don’t know how you ended up together as prison-mates but i did not expect the witch and emrys to be in my doorstep, inside the same cell nonetheless! Morgana: And? You want us to be your slaves? do you really think we’re willing to submit to you? Ringleader: don’t worry, i can think of ways to tame you

Morgana stomach jolted at the implication

Ringleader: Despite your…peerless reputation, you’re both are a headache for me to handle…so i just want one (sat on his make-shift throne) go ahead then, fight to the death! don’t you hate each-other?

Morgana looks at Merlin, and he looks at her. It’s true, Morgana had been wanting to kill Merlin for a long time but…

She doesn’t want to kill another one of her kind. And she doesn’t want to kill her friend

Ringleader: Come on! I’m waiting…

The shackles on their hand cracks, and Morgana felt her magic restored. They stare at each-other, circling. Is Merlin going to kill her now? Morgana saw how Merlin body is poised, ready to strike.

She strike first.

They danced around each-other, exchanging blows. The blow was sometimes deadly, other-times unnecessary spells. But they never land a fatal blow, even if morgana is panting, and merlin is out of breath

Morgana: …what’s wrong Merlin?…scared? Merlin: You wish (strike a spell that tore the fabric of her skirt) Morgana: (gasped) My dress! Merlin: …oops…

Morgana screams, sending a curse towards merlin. Morgana can’t believe it, it actually hits him, and for a moment merlin was confused, because nothing happened

Merlin: well that was anti-climactic (in a girl's voice, realization) morgana change me back right now! Morgana: No

she puts another curse on him, but he dodges it this time. It didn’t take long for merlin to tackle her, she fights back, trying to push him off and they fight like children.

Merlin: Get off me! (shrieking unladylike, his long nose (yes how ironic morgana is a genius) touching the ground) Morgana: You get off! (fights back, hair green. Fingers feels like rubber)

They rolled on each-other back, trying to murder the other until they gave up and just sprawled on the floor, too exhausted to do anything. If Morgana have to fire a spell one more time it feels like she’s going go throw up

Morgana: You’re pathetic Merlin Merlin: You’re even more pathetic Morgana: At least I’m stronger than you, you look like a twig Merlin: Well I’ll let you know that- Ringleader: ENOUGH

(they both look at him)

Ringleader: Just die already! I don’t care who dies! Just kill someone! If you don’t want to do it, then I’m going to kill the both of you! Morgana + Merlin: ….HAHAHAHAHHA Merlin: Did you hear that??? He says he’s going to kill us Morgana: ‘Just die already’ (still laughing even as she felt her hair is being pulled. She felt hands shoving her down, Merlin next to her) Ringleader: Do you have any final words? Morgana: (looks at Merlin) You’re not as worse as I thought Merlin: I’m glad to meet you too Morgana

When the axe about to fall down on their neck, the rooftop shake, and suddenly a dragon is screaming at them. Their assaulters ran, terrified of the beast.

Morgana: Aithusa!!

Merlin laughs beside her, chanting in a foreign language. Aithusa squeal and Morgana paused

Morgana: You’re also a dragonlord Merlin: Yeah not many people know that

Aithusa breathes fire, fending off their attacker

Morgana: merlin if you dare as to so much touches her- Merlin: Morgana, i birthed her Morgana: …??

Morgana had no time to argue when the ringleader is starting to ran to them. She quickly climbed onto her, when Morgana reaches out her hand for Merlin to grab but Merlin fell. Limbs grabbed by the ringleader

Morgana: MERLIN!

Aithusa is shrieking, trying to shield herself and Morgana from the fire. Merlin chants and Morgana felt Aithusa leaving

Morgana: Merlin? MERLIN WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Merlin: Goodbye Morgana Morgana: STOP!!

Morgana tries to reach him, but Aithusa keeps flying, away from the dungeon, away from Merlin

Episode ends

*

End notes: i rlly didn’t expect it to be this long. Anyways sorry if it didn’t made sense and the pacing is off, i’m really rambling here 😭 but this is how i think morgana merlin interaction should go

season 4:

main post:

To find my other ramblings about this AU, filter with the hashtag #must we really rely on fate?

[morqwen]

I’m so curious about what your favourite episodes of merlin are 👀

this is such a good question for someone who hasn’t watched the show in years jskdjflkd you need those rose tinted goggles of time

but honestly aithusa has always been one of my favourites like god... sumtimes u just wanna see merlins hope crushed and brought back yknow lmao i just feel like its got the complexities of good intentions w merlin fighting to do right by his mistake and then!! the cinnamon tography of him literally breathing life into the dragon *mwah* love this ep, and also a kiss for bamf merlin

and also his father’s son bc how can i not include one of the few eps arthur gets some time to think critically for once lol. like hes young hes hurt and hes still looking up to those he trusts w more experience than him for guidance. and.... he fucks up. and he knows hes fucked up and he knows this isnt the kind of king or man he wants to be. also queen annis is a milf and all milf eps are good eps especially the troll ep

[the-king-and-the-druidess]

Merlin had to confess who he was, endear Arthur to magic and start building Albion of his dreams no later than the end of Aithusa episode or the next one. Because every prophecy Merlin had ever heard said that he had to protect Arthur until he was king. As soon as Arthur became king, Aithusa immediately appeared, in the following ep, called the Good Omen for them both. It was significant.

[koalas-koalas-everywhere]

Where did the idea that Merlin is bad at healing magic come from?

Ok, that was a clickbaity title, I know where it came from: that scene in the Crystal Cave where he can’t heal Arthur’s wound. Possibly, also his struggle to heal him from the poisoned arrow in The Coming of Arthur Part 1. However, although I understand 1) the desire to nerf him at least a bit and 2) the delicious irony of someone as good as Merlin and who would like to be gentle as much as he does being crap at healing magic but good at combat, I don’t think this is very accurate.

I mean, this belief is the farthest thing from baseless. I mentioned TCC, and I can’t explain why he’d be unable to heal Arthur other than lack of skill (beyond theorizing that the magic of the Cave was impeding him because he was supposed, destined, if you will, to ask for Taliesin’s help and agree to look at the crystal in exchange, which admittedly doesn’t have much support from canon, or Merlin’s general lack of magical  ability that caused him, for example to make a rose instead of a strawberry for Freya, although that was in the previous season). Then there’s TCoA, although that one’s a bit... complicated, for reasons I’l talk about in a minute, and, last but not least, there’s the Hollow Queen, where Merlin tries to heal himself but he can’t. Besides that, there are some instances when he didn’t try to heal people so we can extrapolate that he was unable, like when Mordred is hurt in The Beginning of the End, when Will and Freya are dying in The Moment of Truth and The Lady of the Lake* or when Arthur passes out in The Last Dragonlord. 

The one from TCoA is complicated, because as I said before, he struggles, and by the time the scene cuts off it seems like he failed, but when Arthur wakes up, he only seems to have problems with the wound itself, not the poison, and doesn’t feel the pain until he walks on it. Then, without a hint of the fever he had before, he walks all the way to Camelot, a day or more, until he can’t go on anymore, but Merlin tells Gaius the spell didn’t work, BUT then Gaius says the wound’s infected, not poisoned, which would be explained by the whole traipsing about with a wounded leg and no treatment, so... I’m not sure what to make of it. 

Then in THQ, there were the ameliorating circumstances of being... you know... dying from poison. It’s more a matter of power than healing skills (when he tries, his eyes flicker like cheap old lightbulbs when he tries to do magic). But we’ll count it.

So that makes it 5 times he would have liked to heal someone with magic but couldn’t due to what we can assume is a lack of skill (I’m not counting Mordred because I don’t think he’d dare to use magic in that case, since Morgana seemed to want to be involved and kept up to date in his treatment, proved by how she watched as he did it without magic), two of which are dubious because he seems to be at least partially successful or because there were extenuating circumstances.

Then there’s times where there were people to heal but the circumstances were... peculiar.

One was his father in The Last Dragonlord. He dies much more quickly than Will, not to mention Freya, which suggests an even worse wound than the one the woman who grew up with Druids, notable healers, said was too deep to heal. Merlin says he could save him, but Balinor cuts him off so he could give his last words, presumably because he, a man we also know possesses some healing skills, knew it was pointless. I really have to wonder if there was anything any ordinary sorcerer could have done (I mean, not to victim-blame, but I didn’t see Balinor trying to heal himself), that even Merlin himself pre-The Diamond of the Day could have done, so I’m reluctant to draw conclusions about his healing abilities from this.**

While he heals Gwen in With All My Heart, technically he does it not through any healing magic but by taking her to the Cauldron of Arianrhod and summoning the Triple Goddess, so it doesn’t help measure his skills either.

Additionally, (and here’s where I start to answer one of the most important questions in this post, which has remained unsaid until now, but which has underlined every single line to the moment: “what the fuck are you ranting about you big dumdum if all you’re going to do is agree that Merlin’s bad at healing?!” It’s about the refutation) there’s his healing of Morgana in TCC. This one’s also weird, because he does heal her, but he needed Kilgarrah’s help to do it. It’s possible that he only gave Merlin the spell, like he did with Sigan, but he has a strange sound effect in his voice when he casts it, so it could also be that he had some extra guidance from Kilgarrah to help him along, such as a power boost or an instinctual understanding of how to perform the spell. Like the last one, then, I don’t think this example gives us any reliable information on his healing skills.

But! It does start us off on the next part of this discussion, which is the times Merlin has successfully healed someone.

The earliest example of this is The Mark of Nimueh, where he heals Gwen’s father, Tom. He just sneaks in, puts a poultice under his pillow, casts the spell, sneaks out, and done! Man awake in seconds, cured by morning. Of course, success isn’t as interesting as failure (might be the reason why they continued this particular storyline by having Gwen accused of sorcery instead of just letting her live), but two things stand out about this healing. The first is that Merlin used a poultice for it, which will come up again later, so make a note of that. The second is that this happens before TCC, so it’s unlikely that Merlin just took that failure to heart and tried to improve. 

But, TCC is the next time since then that he makes an attempt at healing magic, which, whew, talk about a time gap! That’s two seasons, and at least 2 1/2 years! Make a note of this, too. The time after that is, at least, in the same season - TCoA, in which we’ve settled that Merlin seems to have partial success with Arthur’s wound. (“Yes, you’ve already said this before!” Just go with it.)

Next, there’s The Wicked Day. We know that he did the spell right because everything went to shit. Once more, he used aids for the spell, a potion and incense form sage.

The very next episode, Aithusa, without a clear idea of what they’ve been given, only that they’ve passed out and have difficulty breathing (he might have figured out what it was from the smell of the poultice that he found in the stew), he manages to save all four knights and Arthur from poisoning, this time only with an enchantment. 

Then he heals Gwen’s leg in The Hunter’s Heart. Once again, only a spell. Funnily enough, it’s the same wound he tried to heal in TCC, only in a different place.

Last but not least is the poison Gwen uses on Arthur in A Lesson in Vengeance. By the time Merlin has an opportunity to treat him, he’s moments away from death - Gaius says his heart’s nearly stopped, and Merlin himself doubts he has the power to heal him. No potions or herbs, although it’s interesting to note that he does motions similar to chest compressions.

So, to keep tally: his success rate when dealing with poisons and drugs is 100%, and it’s the same for times when he got to use aids such as potions and poultices. It also applies to all healing attempts not subject to extenuating circumstances (magical interference such as the Lamia’s spell or the blade being forged in a dragon’s breath, and when Merlin had to heal himself while he was dying) from TWD forward.

We can see him improve from TCC (season 3) to ALiV (season 5) - he actually makes significant improvement from TCC to TCoA, and from there to TWD and Aithusa. It seems like he learned from his experience in TCC and decided to make up for his lack of natural talent at healing magic by studying. And here’s where it gets really funny. Because we’ve established that there was a time, long before TCC, where he healed someone successfully, and that was Tom, in TMoN. If you’ll remember, around that time Merlin was much more likely to fail the first few (hundred) times he tried a spell, like the one to make that dog statue real and the one to enchant a weapon to fight the griffin. So, way back then, Merlin went, made a poultice, cast a spell and succeeded on his first try, when before (and after) that he’d have difficulties with new spells.

It... actually looks like he had a natural talent for healing magic. 

Okay, hang on! you might say. You spent the first half of this fucking novel talking about his healing goofs, don’t come at me with this bullshit now! you might say.

And here’s where you should pull out those notes I asked you to make. Because between TMoN and TCC there’s a world of difference.

To start off, in the first one he had preparation. He’d been able to look for and study an appropriate spell in his book shortly beforehand and, most importantly, he had a poultice. He’s had a perfect success rate when using those. Look at Dragoon - I’ve talked before about how hilarious it is that Merlin struggles to turn off a spell most have trouble achieving, let alone keeping up. In that first ep, Queen of Hearts, Merlin prepares a whole ass ritual to age up,*** but later needs a potion to go back to his own age. On the other hand, every time after that he just casts the spell and he has no trouble undoing it. While it’s conjecture, it’s a pretty solid theory to say that potions and the like, as I’ve been foreshadowing, function as aids when casting spells. They can be necessary, but sometimes they just give the sorcerer a boost. It follows, then, that any spell cast without them will be weaker, such as, say, the one in TCC.

But! He doesn’t use potions for almost any of the other times, either!

Well, that’s kind of tied into my next point: time.

As we’ve established, almost three years go by between TMoN and TCC, and Merlin doesn’t try to heal anyone in that time. He does, however develop his magic in other ways. By The Moment of Truth he can summon a tornado! By Le Morte D’Arthur he can cast the spell he so struggled over in Lancelot! He can summon a shield that can withstand dragon fire! Went against a Sidhe and a Pixie! He- okay, he got better at combat magic. You might see where I’m going with this.

But right then, he needed to heal Arthur! He’d done it before! But... he’d gone rusty. 

Honest to God. Yes, this is conjecture. No, I don’t have any proof other than what fits with canon. No, I don’t think it was intentional on the writers’ part.But in my mind and in my heart this is what happened. He was originally good or rather decent at healing magic, but after not using it and instead doing other kinds of magic for so long, during what were technically**** formative years for him as a sorcerer, that he actually lost the hang of it. To be fair, though, he makes up for it pretty quickly.

I didn’t think this through to the end before I wrote it, when I started I thought I’d just conclude there were more examples of Merlin being good at healing magic and that would be it, but putting it all together I’ve found a probably unintended pattern of Merlin having a natural talent for healing, but being forced to neglect it for the sake of combat magic. In conclusion, I’m sad.

*Scenes which I just watched to make this post and now I’m crying fucking hell what I do for stupid meta.

**I don’t apply the same logic to Freya because the length of time that must have passed between the scene in the tunnels and her death by the lake, not to mention the amount of jarring that she must have gone through in the trip, makes me think that there probably was a window of possibility there that they just didn’t have the resources to take advantage of. And. I mean. The strawberry scene. I’m just more likely to believe Merlin still had a way to go, magic-wise, but it’s also because of this that I’m not convinced that this is about him being bad at healing, specifically, as much as not being that skilled in magic overall.

*** I also rewatched the scene where he does it and ho-ho-ho-holy shit, his excitement at his idea is adorable.

****Because he was born with magic, he learned ways to use it way before going to Camelot, but this was a new stage of his studies that consisted f different things learned and different ways to learn them and different ways to apply them.

[astudyinfreewill]

unpopular opinion: idk if i'd want a special where arthur finally returns in the modern era, while i see the appeal, im conflicted bc the setting is a huge part of the show's charm. I personally would like an ep of merlin finding himself again after losing so much, reconnecting with gwen, finally bonding with aithusa and maybe getting himself a nice little cottage hidden on the woods near camelot while getting pestered by young sorcerers who want to learn from him 😌😌😌#freemerlin'shappiness

strongly agree | agree | neutral | disagree | strongly disagree

omg vila the gentlest disagree for this because i completely see where you’re coming from and i do absolutely love the setting, i agree with you that it wouldn’t hit the same in the modern world; i also would LOVE to see merlin going back to camelot and BEING ABLE TO LIVE OPENLY AS A SORCERER, because now gwen knows about him and i would absolutely take a show where merlin and gwen bring magic back to camelot which was the original purpose of all of this tragedy, and yes also let merlin adopt baby aithusa!!!! i would watch that show in a HEARTBEAT in fact where do i sign ???

...BUT... i am too much of a romantic sap and still want arthur to return at some point, because we deserved to see him be fascinated and amused and gently tolerant of merlin’s magic and pretending not to be impressed while also starting to accept that there’s magic inside him and what that means for him and how it changes his relationship with merlin?? it wouldn’t have HAD to be in the future if they had just revealed merlin’s magic in an earlier season but HERE WE ARE I GUESS :/

so in conclusion... disagree but only because i want both those things, not bc i’m choosing one over the other <3