#ain’t quiz adorable tho

[crimsonmonsoon]

My new years celebratory art with Qi Ring and Guzi going on a dumb little adventure together <3

[cannedapricot]

Phantom Thief! Park Jihoon

This is legit the whole reason I’m starting this blog sovdbiosb. Inspired by Detective Conan, Saint Tail and the Cat’s Eye because they’re nostalgic asf and I love them. Also, Jihoon in a white suit would be a pleasant sight.

rightrightight ok

phantom thief! jihoon works with phantom thief! park woojin

they go by the name “PS”

which everyone thinks means something deep af

PS actually stands for “Pink Sausage”

but no one needs to know

everyone also thinks that it’s just one person

but in this au everyone’s clueless so please let it slide

what do they steal?

they steal hearts

lol jk

the two steal “priceless” paintings, sculptures and all sorts of art resulting in the town calling them art thieves

but the only art the duo steals are the ones that don’t belong where they are

they also drop not so subtle hints at the police about the illegal item

for example, there was this one time when an owner of a museum put up a painting of the famous “Cafe Terrace at Night” by Vincent van Gogh, claiming that it was the original

he wanted more publicity for the museum

surprise, surprise

it was a fake

the citizens were clueless lmao

so off went the pink sausages

the museum and the fake painting was the headline on next morning’s newspaper

how the two know of the frauds you ask?

associate! jisung runs a coffee shop down the block and overhears everything

you would think that the police would let them be because they’re doing the right thing, bUT NO

speaking of the police

you are the daughter of a famous detective who has solved many crimes

you’ve grown up seeing your dad work and reading detective novels

you were like, “i wanna be a detective lmao how hard can it be”

its hard

especially when you use your dad’s high position and become a junior detective of some sorts

and get assigned to the PS case

ok that’s fine but,

yOU’VE BEEN ASSIGNED TO THIS BLOODY CASE SINCE THIRD YEAR OF JUNIOR HIGH BUT YOUR ASS HAS BEEN CHASING AFTER THIS DUMB THIEF FOR THREE YEARS TO NO AVAIL

BUT THE WORDS “GIVE UP” DON’T EXIST IN YOUR DICTIONARY

“technically you could just let it slide and half ass your work,, i mean,,, they’re not stealing anything just for the sake of it-”

SLAMS DESK

“YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND JINYOUNG, STEALING IS STEALING AND THEY SHOULD FACE THE CONSEQUENCE FOR IT”

HUFFS AND WALKS AWAY

PS has been sending you calling cards on what, where and when they’ll be stealing something next

per your request of course

you kinda just screamed at one of the two one night while chasing them,

“heY, PS, YEAH YOU.”

HUFFS

“MAN, I’M NOT FIT ENOUGH STOP RUNN I N G”

“oK THAT’S IT IM STOPPING”

PS stopped to look at you in amusement

“I’M NOT LETTING YOU GO JUST BECAUSE IM NICE THOUGH,,,, NOT BECAUSE IM ABOUT TO DIE FROM SPRINTING” yeah, totally

“LOOK,,,, SINCE I’M SO NICE, CAN YOU AT LEAST NOTIFY ME WHEN YOU’RE GONNA STEAL SOMETHING NEXT??“

he left without answering you

you were dejected

but then a note came for you!!

yay!!!

not like it help a whole lot but,,,

back to the present,

so, you’re in your last year of high school

park jihoon and park woojin happen to go to the same school as you but you, for some reason, have never ran into either of them in your whole high school career

 you have but you’re oblivious af

 the two know you of course

they fucking notify you every fortnight about their heists how could they not know you

heck, everyone knows you

you’re that one detective who’s never solved a case

but because fate loves a good show, jihoon transfers to your chemistry class in the middle of year

you’re like

????

in the dab smack middle of the year??? what- how-

apparently, he somehow screwed up a experiment in physics and the teacher had enough lmao

wow what a great thief amirite

your class bursts into whispers as soon as he steps in the lab

you just,,,, sent an uninterested glace his way then buried your head in your arms and went back to sleep

 liSTEN,,,,, IT WASN’T YOUR FAULT THAT PS DECIDED TO WAIT UNTIL MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT TO SHOW UP

“ok guys, this is park jihoon, he’s a new addition to the class.”

“ohmygod he’s adorable”

“bless the heavens for some eye candy at last”

“look y/n it’s a cute dude why aren’t you reacting”

“fuck off, daehwi”

“alrighty jihoon you can sit next to bae jinyoung at the back over there. raise your hand jinyoung”

jihoon heads over to jinyoung and brushes past you on his way

you glance up as he does and you thought you saw him smirk? ?? ? ?

“how tired am i tf”

it’s not your imagination, jihoon recognizes you

“y/N I WOULD APPRECIATE IF YOU PAYED ATTENTION TO CLASS”

“MR KIM YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND,,,,,, I’M TIRED”

“I DON’T CARE????? DO YOU WANT TO PASS OR NOT”

AGGRESSIVELY HUFFS

after the class, jihoon rushes up to you and asks for your chemistry notes

“hi! y/n is it? could i borrow your notes?”

“?? you couldn’t borrow baejin’s?? why me?”

“uh,,,, i couldn’t read his handwriting,,,,, yeah! that’s why!!”

sounds fake but ok

you end up surrendering your chemistry notes to him

“thanks y/n!! you’re a life saver!!”

runs off like the cutie he is

daehwi slides up to you with jinyoung in tow while wiggling his eyebrows

“jinyoung has really neat handwriting if you ask me”

“yeah well, you’re practically in love with him so you think everything about him is neat”

“i- you’re not wrong”

jihoon returns your book to you the next lesson and everything goes as per usual for the next two weeks

until the next calling card arrives with a bang

literally

you opened your book, expecting nothing to happen

but a fucking balloon went off above you or something the moment you opened it

and the calling card falls down with colored confetti onto your head

“i’ll be taking the sculpture from Jung’s house tonight -PS”

BITCHWHATTHEFUCK

normally, calling cards would arrive without much,,, pow

like in the mailbox

all the students around you were shook

as were you

jihoon was just,,,,,, hiding his grin

daehwi and jinyoung walk into the class, takes one look at you and goes,

“what happened to you”

“it looks like a unicorn pooped on you”

“thanks”

jihoon’s new hobby unlocked!

teasing y/n!

so from then on out, all the calling cards would arrive with a huge noise

you hated the attention you were getting along with it

people actually thought you worked with PS!!

ok but jihoon would have the time of his life planning

“should i just write jeojang on the school notice board and the details underneath?”

“.... jihoon, your dumb aegyo has nothing to do with our heist”

“fine,,, i’ll bake y/n a cake instead”

woojin just sighs

jihoon has actually gotten quite close with you recently

daehwi and jinyoung readily accepted him and woojin in your little squad and you guys would frequent jisung’s cafe after school iaubfisbfvis thATS ACTUALLY SO CUTE IM CRYING

jihoon’s favorite pastime was still teasing you though

like

you did worse that jihoon on that chemistry quiz?

you’re never gonna hear the end of it

you fell face first into mud?

jihoon still has video he recorded to this day

the five of you were really close and y’all thought you knew everything about each other

hahaha

nope

you still had no idea that woojin and jihoon were PS

ffs y/n

the people you’re basically obsessed with are right in front of you

actually, jihoon’s just as obsessed with you tbh

daehwi, jinyoung and woojin has caught him staring at you on multiple occasions

“uH,,,, I WAS,,,, STARING AT THE WINDOW NEXT TO Y/N HAHAH YEAH”

he likes you

all the teasing basically lead to this

it’s not that jihoon hasn’t realized

he knows

but he ain’t about to admit that

a thief liking a detective??? psssh how absurd

but in jihoon’s eyes, all you ever cared about was PS

was he jealous of himself? yes

you,,, kinda,,, sorta felt things towards jihoon as well

but you ain’t about to admit that either

likE WHENEVER HE DID THAT STUPID JEOJANG THING YOU WOULD RUN AWAY AND NOBODY KNOWS WHETHER IT’S OUT OF CRINGE OR YOU’RE JUST MELTING

so you two just stay in a relationship full of teasing

the whole school lowkey thinks you’re together tho

one night, you were standing in front of another “priceless” art

courtesy of jihoon’s card earlier in the day

“i’ll be taking the min’s painting tonight hehe~~<3 -PS”

oh how the cards have changed over time

remember when i said that everyone thinks that PS is one person

well, everyone included you up til tonight

you were just strolling around the painting by yourself

the cops were situated around the building

complete with two standing in front of the door to the room with the painting

the plan was for you to stay in front of the painting all night and if PS came, you would tackle that bitch and call for backup

then PS actually came and all hell broke loose

the cops were running around trying to catch him, forgetting what the initial plan was

but for some dumb reason, they forgot to notify you

resulting in you having no idea what was happening outside the room lol

until finally, some cop remembered notified you via handheld radio

“whAT THE FUCK DANIEL YOU NOTIFY ME NOW???”

“LOOK IM SORRY,,,, BUT PS IS STILL RUNNING AROUND THE HOUSE AND YOU NEED TO COME”

swearing under your breath, you decide to just sit and wait for PS to come into the room you were currently in

why run around if he was after the painting that you were right in front of

he’d have to come sooner or later

you then saw a shadow outside the window

white suite, white gloves and that familiar badge on his chest

no mistake, it had to be PS

and you rush to hide behind a corner

PS makes his way in and stands in front of the painting, seemingly admiring it

“it’s quite beautiful, such a shame that it was stolen”

iT WAS STOLEN????

THIS WAS THE NTH TIME YOU’VE GUARDED SOMETHING LIKE THIS

nonetheless, you act according to plan and lunge for him

but in a swift motion, he clutches the painting and avoids you

“whoops, watch your step” he says, chuckling

you let out a noise that resembled a growl at him and lunge yet again

but he was already out the door

you ran after him

picking up your handheld radio, you were about to call for backup when suddenly you meet with another person dressed in a white suit

but he didn’t have a painting in his hands

you stopped running, trying to figure out a sensible reason

the figure brushed past you and jumped out a window

then you receive exasperated message from cop! daniel stating that PS has gotten his hands on the painting and is now running away

not forgetting to question your whereabouts

you were now confused

you were 100% sure you saw PS run out with the painting

but then you ran into him without the painting the same time as daniel saw him with the painting

the thief got away that night but you called up your dad and told him that the painting was a fake

your dad whooshed over in record time

after doing his research your dad had found out that the painting had originally belonged to a woman in her 60s

the person you had met tonight before the case was a man in his 40s

your dad arrested him on the spot

you hardly slept that night

wondering about if PS was just one person, how could he be at two places in the same time

you concluded that PS was two people

spoiler, woojin was the distraction and jihoon was the person you saw take the painting

you tried to convince your coworkers the next day but they wouldn’t believe you

in fact, they had gotten more suspicious of you

you were the only person who wasn’t there during the chase

YOU WORK WITH A BUNCH OF IDIOTS

frustrated, you complained to jinyoung (who i forgot to mention, was a cop in training oops)

jinyoung believed you

he knew how hard you worked just to find out who this guy was

but he couldn’t do much to help

so he just comforted you

you were thankful for him (I’M SO SOFT IDBFUVIS)

with no one able to help you out, you decided to take matters inyour own hands

you were drained the next school day

jihoon felt bad for making you chase after him to no avail

so he did aegyo for you

it worked

sorta

woojin and jinyoung ended up dragging him out of class because of the second hand embarrassment though

daehwi just,,,,

cringed

really hard

you received another card three weeks later

“i’ll be after the “gem of the sea” necklace tonight. sorry for making you run all the time :c -PS”

???? is this thief apologizing???

anyways, this time, you were ready to find out who he was

it was a fool-proof plan

you see, you were familiar with this museum and knew it like the back of your hand

you were already starting to feel sad about ending the three year chase

that night, you were situated in front of the necklace

with a dozen cops because they didn’t trust you lmao

the necklace was a beautiful royal blue and you could understand why people loved it

it shone even in the moonlight

when the clock hit ten, all lights were cut off in the room and turned back on in a matter of seconds

but the necklace was gone in the mere seconds the light turned off

cops started to stream out the door of the display room, running everywhere trying to catch the thief

you were about to do the same

but daniel stopped you

“nuh uh kiddo, let me check your pockets first”

“ kang danIEL ARE YOU SUSPECTING THAT I TOOK IT?”

“yes”

so you were held back for a minute

you didn’t even give daniel time to apologize for suspecting you before you were out the door

cop! seongwoo announced that he saw PS in the left wing

but you head towards the right wing, knowing that there were two of them and the one seongwoo saw was likely a distraction

your suspicions were confirmed when you catch a glimpse of white

it was jihoon with the necklace

he was casually strolling towards the storage room where he would make his escape

jihoon had no idea you were after his ass

but as soon as he neared the window of the storage room, you appeared in the doorway

huffing because wow that was the quickest you had ever been

jihoon turned to you, the full moon shining through the full-length window behind him

it was a breathtaking sight

buT YOU COULDN’T SEE HIS FACE DAMMIT

“oh, it seems as though i’m cornered”

“yOU,,,,, DON’T PLAY WITH ME,,,, WHO ARE YOU”

“PS, obviously”

SCREAMS INTERNALLY

“NO SHIT”

he chuckled, pulling the necklace out of his pocket

“after this? it’s quite pretty isn’t it? almost as pretty as you are”

holy shit

is this thief

f l i r t i n g with you????

you blushed

but blamed it on the exercise lmao

“dON’T CHANGE THE SUBJECT-”

“it’s a shame that i can’t just steal you away”

PARK JIHOON YOU SMOOTH FUCKER

HE SAYS THIS NOW AS PS BECAUSE HE HASN’T GOT THE GUTS TO SAY IT NORMALLY AS PARK JIHOON

but jihoon then notices that he’s taking way too long and woojin would beat his ass if he took longer

looking down, he finds a couple of cops below, waiting to see of anyone tries make an escape

jihoon sighs, opting to escape another way

aka jumping across trees until he reaches jisungs mini van lmao

so as you jump for nth time at time

he brushes past you whispering in that deep ass voice,

“i’ll save you in my heart instead”

leaving you shook af

“why did that remind me of that stupid jeojang thing jihoon does?”

WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS

you think you have a little crush on PS (with his low pitch voice lmao)

but your heart also goes crazy around park jihoon (and his high pitched voice obvfisbv)

you’re just like,

“fuck”

“do i really like two guys at once”

it’s one dude

but you didn’t need to know that

this was long and kinda crappy but here’s my first au!! sorry there wasn’t much jihoon here aaaa

please give me some feedback on how it was,,,, 2.7k words is a lo t, should i try make my next one shorter?

please ignore any mistakes haha,,,, i’m really tired and don’t wanna proof read fsovbuiqoebvo

thank you all for reading my shit though <3333