#ah yes the beauty of nor knowing what to wrote whatsoever

[restapesta]

hii emina!! #14 for valentine’s day 💌 (for the february ask meme) <33

Tami couldn't help but feel fucking jealous. Offended too, for that matter.

Lip forgot fucking Valentine's Day—Valentine's day—and now Tami was forced to sit in the kitchen with the gathered-around Gallagher & Co, watching how Ian and Mickey annoyingly proved the fact that she could do so much better than fucking Lip.

For fuck's sake, he didn't remember goddamn Valentine's day. It wouldn't have been a big deal had he not almost forgotten their anniversary, too. Tami got that shit was stressful these days—that Lip wasn't all that happy with his delivery-boy job and their 'temporary' stay at the Gallagher house with his abundance of siblings, but seriously. That didn't mean she had to sit around stoically on fucking celebrate-your-love day, knowing she had been forgotten, while simultaneously watching the it couple of their family making kissy faces at each other.

Maybe they weren't making kissy faces, exactly—Tami would pay to see Mickey do anything in that realm, really—but did they have to be so obnoxiously in love? All while Tami was mourning her own loss of a Valentine?

She wasn't a teenager anymore, goddamn it, but she deserved nice things, at least once or twice a year. Some fucking day where she could feel special and completely in love, despite living with ten other people and kind of, sort of being in debt.

Tami was in love with Lip. She was fairly certain he was in love with her too, but did he have to forego this one thing from his memory? Did he have to invite Mickey and Ian over for a family dinner to rub salt into the wound?

Tami was fucking fine with Ian and Mickey on most days—it wasn't even as if she saw them all too often now that they had moved out (she even sort of missed them)—and their displays of affection were more sweet to her than anything.

It was cute seeing Ian pull Mickey into a kiss randomly before he went off to work at the warehouse. Or Mickey wrapping his hands around Ian's waist while they cooked dinner together, prolonging the creation of the simplest of meals, like boxed mac-and-cheese, just so they could hang around each other domestically, a little bit longer.

Nobody minded it all too much when they did those small things, and they were pretty much used to the constant sex-talk, however inappropriate and explicit. Somehow even the never-ending bickering stopped bothering them so much.

But god-fucking-damn-it, why did they have to rub it in her face now?

Ugh, fine, we get it, you're celebrating Valentine's day like a normal couple, being all lovey-dovey and shit. We get it.

They probably spent the entire day being sickly sweet and in love, like fucking teenagers. So gross.

Why the actual fuck did Lip forget?

Tami shot daggers Ian and Mickey's way, watching as they, in the middle of the Gallagher cluster-fuck—they were having dinner like usual, a cacophony of noises filling the slightly-renovated space up, something Tami had already gotten used to—talked lowly amongst each other, slight smiles on their faces.

They were so happy about fucking nothing as they sipped on respective beers, matching rings glinting on their fingers, now blinding to Tami's eyes when they had only been pretty before.

When would Lip propose?

Nope, nope, nope. Back to the current married couple, Tami thought.

They pulled apart, their heads no longer huddled together in some secret, husband talk. Ian placed bread onto Mickey's plate, reaching across for the salt, murmuring something about, Mickey liking everything unbelievably salty like a crazy person.

Fuck off, Gallagher. At least I don't like spicy shit.

Well, I don't think you should be surprised I like spicy things. I married you, didn't I?

A beat as they stared at each other lovingly—yuck, ew, disgusting—and then came Mickey's reply.

Sap.

Her eyes narrowed impossibly as she watched them steal fucking glances when the other one wasn't looking. Fucking glances, like teenagers who just discovered their crush liked them back and were about to have their first fucking kiss.

Ugh, why did they have to be so goddamn in love all the time?

Tami even remembered meeting Mickey for the first time, thinking how there was no way in fucking hell he and Ian were together. No way they were anything more than, what, fuck-buddies?

She also remembered the look Mickey wore once Ian entered the room, in all his beautiful glory, his entire face just lighting up like a fucking street lamp when the sun goes down. Eyes crinkling at the corners, an upturn of his mouth, a goddamn gleam appearing in his features.

Tami couldn't believe that the guy who literally just got out of prison was staring openly at his—boyfriend?—with so much intensity and love. The moment Tami had slipped out of view, she saw them share a kiss, all smiley, and shit.

She couldn't believe it then, but she could believe it now.

Why were they so in love?

How could somebody be so in love?

Tami had fallen in love a couple of times. She'd had unrequited crushes and first boyfriends, and older men who appeased to her daddy issues—still, she'd never quite had what Ian and Mickey had. Not that she thought anybody did.

Pulling herself out of her thoughts, she interrupted whatever conversation the two men in question were landing. They were talking still, bodies practically pressed together as they got unnaturally close at the dining table.

Tami was curious. She wanted to know.

She wanted to know how. How in the holy hell did somebody fall in love so fucking hard that they never let each other go? That they went through every single fucking obstacle they stumbled upon, still walking out alive in the end?

With Lip and their relationship, it was just good until it wasn't and until Tami was a second away from picking up their child and walking away, no matter how good of a father to her child her boyfriend was, and how much she actually loved him.

With Debbie and Sandy, it was being attached by the hip, together in all ways, until all of a fucking sudden, Sandy was gone. Gone from their lives as she had never even been there, replaced by somebody completely insane.

There was Carl, who Tami had never even seen in a committed relationship.

She didn't even want to mention fucking Frank and Monica if the stories Lip had told her were any true.

So, Tami asked.

"Can you guys tell me something," Her tone was only slightly accusing, the bitterness seeping through as she found herself going through a third bottle of Old Style. Even Lip raised his eyes up from the food and over to look at Tami as she addressed everyone's favorite gay couple.

"How in the holy fuck do you manage it?"

Ian and Mickey shared a glance—a fucking glance like they were reading each other's minds—before Ian raised an eyebrow.

"Manage what?"

"Being this seemingly perfect couple."

Lip nudged her foot in question just as Mickey snorted, placing the beer away from his lips so he could properly laugh. Ian rolled his eyes at it.

"We're not fucking perfect," was Mickey's simple answer.

Tami shook her head. "No. No, listen. I get that you're not perfect but I just don't get how. How do you just have this relationship?"

Ian seemed confused. "And what do you think this relationship is?"

"Do you guys even hear yourselves ninety percent of the fucking time?"

Debbie snorted at that. All eyes went to her. "Course they don't. They probably wouldn't be doing them if they did."

"What are we doing?" Mickey asked, and Tami scoffed when she noticed him moving his chair slightly away so he wasn't practically sitting in Ian's lap.

"Why are you asking this shit?" Lip whispered from beside her, apprehension in his gaze. Tami hoped he was slightly offended.

She was really fucking offended.

So, she continued, downing her beer in almost one go.

"I'm talking about how you're joined at the hip."

Ian shook his head. "No, we're not."

Liam made an 'eh' motion with his hands, chiming in, "You live together, you work together. You probably spent the entire day together."

Tami nodded at the boy in agreement. "How do you not get, like, bored of each other?"

They briefly shared another look before Ian shrugged. "I like hanging around him. Mickey's fun company."

Tami groaned, not realizing how they managed to just be so casual about things that didn't make sense to her.

"See?" She said. "I'd probably die if I had to spend more than a couple of hours with the same person, let alone my entire fucking day."

"We get annoyed with each other," Ian defended. "We fight, like, all the time."

Mickey shot him a glare. "Not all the time. Just when you're being an annoying bitch."

"Of when you're being an annoying bitch, Mr. Know-it-all."

"Fuck you, I do know it all."

Ian took a sip of his beer. "Uh-uh. Mr. Milkovich, knows everything about everything."

"Well, I gotta know shit if I wanna put up with your ass the rest of my life."

Ian's face softened suddenly from the playful bickering, sending Mickey a soft smile.

"What are you smiling at, dork?"

Ian's happy expression didn't falter. "You said the rest of your life."

Mickey rolled his eyes. "Duh? Thought we were married?"

"Just," Ian shrugged. "Makes me happy to hear it."

Then they smiled at each other all soft, and Tami just barely suppressed a gag. She felt like she'd just been dumped and was forced to attend some love rally.

How to feel single 101.

"Do you, like, not see my point here?"

Mickey looked towards her, eyes narrowing slightly. "Why do you care so much, right now? It's not that big of a deal that Ian's a complete and utter sap," He shot a playful look in Ian's direction. "We're married and we've been together for a fucking while. We're allowed to act..."

Mickey hesitated.

"We're allowed to be in love without worrying whether or not we'll be judged for it or fucking get told to stop." He cast his eyes downward. "We've had enough of that shit already."

It wasn't silent for long, but Mickey's words rang loud in Tami's ears.

She didn't know a lot about Ian and Mickey during the first years of their relationship—she had only met them after fucking ten years of being together, after all—but she knew enough to be able to say with confidence that it couldn't have been easy. And knowing that, she could easily tell how she was being somewhat of a nagging bitch.

"Don't worry," Tami said softly. "I'm not judging you. Just," She sighed loudly before continuing, "admiring the way you're just completely enamored with each other. It makes you wonder, you know? What you could have."

The two seemed somewhat eased with that, smiles appearing on their faces as they looked at each other, like they knew that what Tami was giving them was a compliment, not judgment. But then, Tami's words set in.

All eyes went to Lip.

Tami's own widened.

"I did not mean it like that!" She defended immediately, shifting so she could look at Lip who was more than hurt by the look in his eye. Tami spoke to him as she said, "It's just that, today's fucking Valentine's day, and—"

"Today's Valentine's day?"

It was Ian who asked out of the blue, and she turned to look at him, wondering what he was talking about. He was looking at Mickey who seemed just as confused.

Of course it was Valentine's day. Tami had been bitter the entire day because it was fucking Valentine's day.

"It is?" Mickey said, eyes going warily towards Ian.

"So, we just, uh, forgot about it?"

Mickey nodded, a weird look on his face like he had forgotten their anniversary or some shit. "I guess so."

Tami was just about to open her mouth. Just about to ask if they really didn't spend the day being lovey-dovey with each other since it was Valentine's day, but rather because every day was obviously Valentine's day for them, when Lip spoke.

"Today's the thirteenth, Tami, for fuck's sake. Valentine's day is tomorrow." He smiled at her, seemingly catching onto why she had been so inquisitive in the first place. "Don't worry, I didn't forget."

Tami's mouth fell open and she only managed a simple 'oh'. Lip seemed content. Not at all caught by surprise at her statement. Maybe he really hadn't forgotten.

"Well, uh," She stammered out, heat crawling up her neck. "Good."

Lip smiled at her.

Ian's voice interrupted their staring contest.

"Wait, so you forgot Valentine's day?" He asked Mickey, an incredulous look on his face.

"Um, excuse me bitch, you forgot it, too!"

Ian scoffed. "So, you're telling me we'd wake up tomorrow and what, just continue on like always?"

"Well, you shoulda had something planned then, Ian!"

"Me? Why me?"

Mickey made a 'duh' face. "You fucking forgot it, too. Why would it be me?"

"Well, I'm sorry for having a million things going on right now."

"What million things, Ian? I'm literally with you every second of the day. What things?"

"Well," He started in a tone that didn't bode anything well. "you see, some of us—"

"Oh no, you fucking won't with that sentence."

Tami watched as the it couple fought over forgetting Valentine's day.

She laughed at the sight of them, bickering and shouting, not really angry but enjoying the fight.

They'd still be sappy as fuck the next day. They'd still be lovey-dovey, making kissy faces at each other.

This was what she meant.

They were best friends. Lovers. Partners. Always by each other's sides.

Tami looked over towards Lip.

Maybe she had one too.

[lucisfavoritedemon]

Always & Forever: Part 7

Pairing: Lucifer x reader

Summary: Being forced into an arranged marriage by your father doesn't go quite to plan when your soon to be husband tries to take the only freedom you have ever known. Little does he know someone else was listening in. Go on a journey to discover that Lucifer may not be as bad as he appears. He did save your life after all.

Warnings: talks of acts of violence, talks of possession, age gap, cursing, fluff, some angst, mentions of blood and injury, talk of mature topics, 18+ only.

Word Count: 2,301

A/N: I try to stay as true to the time period as I am comfortable with. This an 18+ only series. You have been warned. There is a lot of talk about mature topics. You have been warned. All thoughts in italics.

Enjoy!

I stood there shaking horribly, waiting for the sting of a sword and then nothing, but it never came. I opened my eyes and looked at Lucifer, his face was written with fear, and sadness. He slowly started to walk towards us. I hide further behind Sam not knowing what could happen.

“I-I’m not going to hurt you princess...I-I didn’t mean what I said...it was just so he would stop torturing me with hope that you would come back to me.”

I stayed where I was, still scared of the thought he was going to hurt me.

“Could you move away from her please? I want her to know I’m not a threat.” Lucifer looks to Sam, and he moves no hesitation.

“Y/N, please look at me. I’m not going to hurt you. I could never hurt you. I would never actually kill Maddox, or your father, or anyone from Lucaea kingdom.”

“Wh-why didn’t you come back? You were given multiple chances...I called your name in my sleep. I wanted you by my side, to feel your arms around me, but...you never came. You’d rather be fighting our army than be by my side.” I was fighting tears because all I ever wanted was the man I loved to hold me in his arms.

“I-I wanted to...but I couldn’t.”

“I’m your wife! And you couldn’t do your job and be by my side, when you knew I wanted you there.”

“I know I failed, okay?! Quit reminding me!”

I jump at him raising his voice. I didn’t know what to do. I could leave and go back home, pretend like I never came here, and move on with my life, or I could stay and hope that Lucifer really will stay this time. I knew it was wishful thinking that he would stick around this time, but I wanted to hope so badly that he would.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t keep being reminded that I failed you. I don’t want to fail you. Not again.”

“You clearly hate being reminded about stuff. Hope, failure. You know what you’re doing right now, giving me false hope that you’ll ever stick around. I want to hope so badly you will, but the more you open your mouth, the less hopeful I become.”

He looked down, and I knew that this was probably the end. We had to go our separate ways. I should have listened to Dean when he said it wasn’t a good idea. 

“I guess that’s it then…” I say my voice cracking from the tears I was holding back.

I squeeze through the guards and slowly walk away. I walk to my father and his men and mount a horse, “let’s go home.” I told my father. 

He nods and gestures to his men to move out. I feel a single tear roll down my cheek. This was it. Lucifer wasn’t coming back into my life, but maybe it was for the best. He would just keep leaving every time he failed, even though failure is a natural thing to happen.

“Your highness, is everything alright?” Maddox said trotting his horse next to mine.

“It’s over, I failed my kingdom. I should have just stayed at the castle. I should have known better than to leave and chase after some fantasy of mine. I should have listened to Dean and Sam about this. That it wasn’t a good idea.”

“Don’t talk like that. You did your best, and that was the closest we have ever gotten to peace this far. The Oslucatish princes are just stubborn men who don’t know what’s best for them and their kingdom. You did the right thing coming here. I wish, for your sake, that things turned out different. I know you love him. Truth is when you were ill you..”

“Kept calling for him. I know. I found your letters to him.”

“My-my letters? H-he kept them?”

“Yeah, he had every single letter you wrote. He even got back the letter he sent you.”

“He never sent me a letter. I never got a response from any of my letters.”

“H-he never responded? B-but he had a letter…” I think about what Lucifer said, what if he was telling the truth that he didn’t mean what he said? Maybe he wrote the letter in anger, and never sent it. Oh no, what have I done. “Maddox, I messed up. Really, really bad.” I stop my horse and turn it straight around and run back to the village.

“Your majesty wait!” Maddox yells.

I kept running though, I needed to fix this. Maybe there could be peace between our kingdoms after all. Had Luc just told me he never sent it, this could have been avoided. I get to the gate when I’m stopped by one of the village people.

“Miss, if you have come looking for the army they have returned home. Prince Michael showed up and the second prince is being tried for treason.”

“N-no…”

I sent my horse into a gallop and headed to the kingdom of Oslucatish. I had to stop this. I couldn’t let Lucifer give up like this. He hasn’t failed me. I failed him. I will ultimately fail if I cannot stop Michael from killing him. 

“Halt! You are not permitted to enter this kingdom without strict orders or an invitation.” A guard spoke up, stopping me.

“How’s this for an invitation?” I mumble, rearing my horse and running right past them.

I heard them call to stop me, but I was on a mission. To stop this war and get Lucifer back.

3rd Person POV:

Inside the castle the king waited for his eldest son for an explanation as to why his brother was on the execution line.

“Father, as you know we are at war with Lucaea, but I have a strong feeling that he is the reason they have the upper hand in this war. He is still in kahoots with King Nova himself. I believe I saw some Royal Lucaea Knights leaving the village near the Southern Mountain. I knew he was probably leaking intell on our latest attack.”

“Alright son. You plead your case. Lucifer!” Guards brought his second son, who was battered and bruised, over in chains, “did you or did you not tell those knights of our next attack.”

“No sir. I was actually meeting someone else from Lucaea.”

“Ah ha! I told you father…”

“Let him finish son.”

“I was meeting with Princess Y/N herself. She requested to meet in secret so no one knew what she was planning. I figured that neutral territory would be the best place, and it was halfway for the both of us.”

“What did she tell you, Lucifer.”

“I cannot say. I made a promise, on our love, that I would never tell another soul. Especially not with Michael in the room.”

“Would you tell me if your brother wasn’t in the room?”

“No father, I would not. You would just use it against Lucaea and destroy their kingdom. I don’t trust any of you.”

“See father? I should have just ended the bitch when I had the chance. Too bad that little mage found the antidote to my rare poison.”

“I-it was you Michael? You poisoned the princess?”

“She refused to marry me. Father gave me the plant all I had to do was put a single drop in her glass. Of course, you had already arrested me, so I let Gabe do the dirty work for me.”

“F-father? Is this true? You wanted to kill my wife?”

“She was promised to Michael after all. It was not your decision to choose that you would be the next one in line to marry her.”

“I’m the next oldest. You wouldn’t give her to Gabe, would you?”

“If that’s what I decided I wanted to do, then Gabe would marry her.”

“Fine, you want to know what Y/N and I talked about? Talked about complete destruction of Oslucatish.”

Lucifer then breaks free of his chain and pulls out his sword. Ready to fight anyone who dared to come near him.

“You are a traitor Lucifer! You are not fit to be king! Nor my heir! Guard! Seize him!”

Lucifer then starts to fight off every guard, but all he can think about is how heartbroken the princess was. He was fighting for something he knew would never come back to him. She was gone, and wanted nothing to do with him. He had turned into someone he didn’t even recognize, and it chased her away. He couldn’t look in the mirror the same way again knowing he is the reason the love of his life was now gone.

One of Michael’s knights catches Lucifer off guard and tackles him binding him in chains.

“I order the execution of the Second Prince of Oslcatish to be held at dawn! Take him away!”

The door suddenly burst open and there stood a beautiful girl. She had everyone looking at her, all but one person. 

“I have some arrangements to discuss with you, your Majesty.”

Reader POV:

“I have a few arrangements to discuss with you, your Majesty.” I bow clumsily showing I have no respect for him whatsoever.

“How dare you come into my palace and demand to discuss with me!”

“I can do what I want King Chuck. I am Princess Y/N of Lucaea. And I believe you are the reason there is war between our kingdoms. So tell me why I should respect you when you're the reason my people are starving."

The king looked at me intrigued, “so you are the girl that has my boys going crazy. It's no wonder though, you're very beautiful. Sorry about the poison by the way, but no one gets away with breaking my son's heart.”

"It was you? I'll have you know that your son tried to kill me at our very first meeting. You tell me then why I chose the second prince.”

“You chose Lucifer?”

“Father, he interfered!” Michael yelled. Typical spoiled brat throwing a tantrum. 

“Yes, I chose Lucifer. He saved my life. I owed him that much. I would give everything to have him by my side for all eternity. As my friend, as my king, as my love.”

“I see. Would you die for him if it meant he lived?”

“Y/N! Don't listen to him!” Lucifer yelled, but got smacked down with the hilt of a sword.

“I would, yes. But you cannot kill the king of Lucama on neutral ground.”

“Ha! He is no king!”

I pulled out the document stating that King Nova III has stepped down, and that Lucifer and I have been crowned king and queen of Lucaea.

“Release him. Mark my words girl. This isn't over. Michael, retreat your army. We surrender.”

“Father, wait! We can't let them win like this.”

“Enough! Now do as I say or you will no longer be my heir.”

“Yes sir.”

The guards slowly release Lucifer who is laying on the ground bleeding. I rush to his side and play with his hair. We'll be home soon, love, I promise. 

~*~

It had been a few days since the incident at Oslucatish, and had not left Lucifer’s side. I was getting worried since he hadn’t woken up, but I still stayed by his side. I sat there playing with his hair, being careful of the wounds on his face.

“How’s he doing?” Maddox asked, walking in and sitting next to me.

“He’s okay I guess. Still hasn’t shown any signs of waking up.”

“It’ll be okay. He’ll wake up soon. I promise.”

“I hope so.” I keep playing with Lucifer’s hair trying to keep myself calm.

As I keep playing with his hair, I feel him start to lean into it. I smile, brushing the hair off his forehead very gently. His eyes slowly open.

“Hey Luc. How are you feeling?”

“Been better.” He smiles looking over at me.

I smile more, so happy that he is okay.

“I leave you two alone then.” Maddox says and walks out.

“How did we get back? I was sure my father would have captured you and forced you to marry Michael.”

“Maddox came to help me get you back. The guards helped me get you out of the palace.”

“What did you do? Please don’t tell me you’re going back?”

I give a light chuckle, “no, Luc. I’m here to stay. I just hope you’ll do the same.”

“Of course. I promise. Am I dreaming?”

I giggle, “Lucifer, you are not dreaming,” I pull something out of the draw of the bedside table, “I found this in the satchel of my horse. Maddox slipped it in before we left the village.” I hand it to him.

“A coronation decree?”

“Father decided that it was time you and I took over the throne. Now that I have found you again, he thinks that we should be crowned.”

“Is this what you used against my father?”

“Yes. I said it would mean a never ending war for Oslucatish if a king was slain on neutral ground. Then, I showed him that.” I pointed to the pieces of parchment.

“Have I ever told you how much I loved you?”

“You’ve only said you loved me once.” I giggle.

“Well, I do love you very much.”

“Good, ‘cause you’re stuck with me till the day we die.”

He chuckles, and it makes me giggle.

I was happy he was back in my life. Even though I didn’t even know he wasn’t a consistent thing in my life a few days ago, but now that I had him back, I never wanted to let him go again.

[stylo-xx]

Never Been Kissed (M)

G-Dragon: Fluff/Small Amount of Angst

PART 1: Ah, Love the Unrequited Kind; Just How I Like It.

A/N: M rating mostly for language at this point. just a bit of a ‘testing the waters’ type of post. If ya’ll seem interested I’ll keep expanding on this one, for now just a little somethin-somethin’ to get ya’ll by.

P.S: songs for your listening pleasure: (BLACKPINK)|| (Samantha Harvey)

P.P.S: Obviously ‘All I Ask’ doesn’t belong to me nor to the character but this is more or less what I pictured her sounding like singing this song.

P.P.P.S: for those of you that didn’t get that ‘Sixteen Candles’ reference (educate yourself)

   Her fingers daintily hovered over the ivory keys, as she took a deep breath before letting her fingers dance across them. Slowly letting the music engulf her being, she closed her eyes painting mental images of a harlequin romance unfolding before her. A love that was simple; no cat and mouse games, no ‘he said she said’ business, no bullshit. Something as easy as ‘I want you to want me’. Boom, plain and simple.

She opened her mouth and began to sing as the words seemed to effortlessly flow out of her soul. Those very few months ago when she first penned the song, she was very hesitant to release the it; she felt she had been a bit too dramatic and no one would like it. Much to her surprise now months later, after the song debuted on the newest, most trending K-Drama of the year, she was being recognized for her efforts and receiving a well-deserved award.

Sure she had, had other accolades under her belt, and being under thirty years of age to boot, none of them seemed to have made her feel as accomplished as this. She had written countless songs for other artists, songs for films and television but she felt that none of those written previously were as raw and open as this was.

Coming to the end of the song she closed her eyes tight and belted out the last few lines of the song, evoking so much passion.

“Bravo” he slow clapped snapping her out of her trance.

“Ahh!” she jumped making her hands smash into the piano keys “Ji-Yong I told you to stop sneaking up on me like that!” she held hand over her heart “you know for someone who spends a hell of a long time in a recording studio, you seem to forget that the glowing red light outside the door means recording in session do not enter”

“You know I dont get why you don't just go up there and sing it yourself. you're letting all these people believe that your amazing voice is hers” he ignored.

She cleared her throat ��well unfortunately we both know I don't do well in front of people like that. And besides she has acute bronchitis, I’m pretty sure no one wants to hear her hacking up phlegm while she ‘sings’ her heart out” she air quoted “I don't mind having other people being the face to my music, just as long as that check comes in with my name on it, it's all good”

He laughed “okay genius but what are you gonna do for tonight when you have to accept your award? have her mouth your acceptance speech?”

“No...that's why you're my date”

“Oh?” he chuckled.

“Yeah, if you're with me you'll direct all the attention away. Once they see you, my speech won't even be a passing thought in their memories”

“You get that once everyone realizes it’s you who won it won’t just be something they’ll forget? can't really erase the memory of the kid that started her career in one of the best dramas like ever. and she was only fifteen”

“Can we not talk about my short lived acting career please? Or any of my past... you know I get war flashbacks about that....”

“You know who’ll really would recognize you?” he smirked

“Okay and zero mention of Jae-Won please!”

“Okay sorry” he chuckled and stepped closer to her and touched her cheek making her cheeks grow hot.

“I still think you should be the one singing your own song” he said sincerely, looking into her eyes making her heart beat loudly in her ears.

“But then again...” he pulled away “you are a chicken, so just be ready by seven. I'll come get you later” he winked as he walked out the door.

She rolled her eyes, making a face and let out a heavy sigh.

“Why am I even friends with him? She threw her head back.

She sighed heavily and blew a stray hair out of her face

“What am I gonna do?” she groaned.

It wasn’t a lie when she said she didn’t do well being the front and center of attention, though of course she wasn’t as terrible as Carrie White was in handling such social situations. Sure, yes it was true she had started out doing dramas and commercials when she was younger but after a traumatizing event of utter embarrassment, she wasn’t quite as keen to be seen in front of the camera; she was more of a behind the scenes kind of person since then. Of which Ji-Yong had no understanding of whatsoever, but to someone as charismatic and charming as Ji-Yong was it was a simple fix; just don’t be nervous. He too had his moments of being shy around unfamiliar faces and would blush at any and all compliments he received, as Kwon Ji-Yong that is. But as G-Dragon, that was a completely different story. He was as successful as he was because he knew when to turn it on, he knew when it was time to don his idol mask and pretend he wasn’t some shy guy who was just really into Chanel and Dragon Ball Z. No, when G-Dragon came around all eyes were on him as if his mere presence commanded the room and the party truly hadn’t started until he walked in. For her however, it was far from easy.

Despite her inability to stand in front of thousands of eyes peering at her and not shutter at the absolute thought of being with someone in an exclusive relationship, she made up for it ironically it writing romanticized songs. Sure she’d sprinkle in a few song about love that actually worked out, but the real heart of it were the songs about having your heart completely shattered, but what really drove people toward her music was how it managed to somehow bring them to tears, strike a raw nerve, make them long for somebody that didn’t even exist; the types of songs that you wholeheartedly serenade to your dog at three in the morning.

Though truthfully, even though she wouldn’t admit it, there were those evenings she would be stuck in a endless hole where he own ‘genius’ about drove herself mad when she would lay back on her bed and google for hours on end Jae-Won and Ji-Yong’s past dating history; all the girls were the same: beautiful beyond belief and were some kind of model or actress. She’d sigh to herself and grab a pillow off her bed and press it flush to her face, contemplating whether or not she could smother herself out of these thoughts but to no avail; she had deadlines to meet. She would repeat to herself: ‘why couldn’t I be like them? What did they have,aside from being blessed with godlike good looks, that I didn’t?’ I mean she had a great personality, she was an excellent listener, she didn’t think she was completely unfortunate looking and she wrote how many award winning songs for people? She didn’t get it. Her grandmother always told her she was such a catch and that any boy would be so lucky to have her but the longer her life went without even the slightest bit of a romantic relationship with any man, let alone anybody, she was beginning to believe that she was destined to be some shut in cat lady that somehow managed to write successful songs about love. Or at least about what she heard read about and seen in movies. For once she just wanted her life to end up like some cheesy 80’s romance movie. She wanted her Jake Ryan waiting outside the church leaning against his red, 1983 Porsche 944 ready to whisk her away to a happily ever after. But unfortunately for her, her life wasn’t a cheesy 80’s romance movie and Jake Ryan wasn’t going to be waiting for her anywhere any time soon. She, somehow, managed to become a decently wealthy shut-in that wrote songs about a love that didn’t exist. At least not in the way she wrote them. Her only claim to feeling heartbreak was her last season of her drama when she thought she was finally mature enough for Jae-Won to not look at her like some kid anymore and actually someone who had feelings and wants and needs too. But then he showed up with his model girlfriend and all her hopes were shattered. She was used to feeling like at times maybe some guys did like her and find her attractive but it would always end with ‘what’s your friend’s name?’ Or ‘can you put in a good word with your friend for me?’ Something every girl is just dying to hear.

She’d even had a crush on Ji-Yong at some point when they first started working together; even when she felt like she had been ridiculously lucky to even be in his presence. Becoming his close friend was just an incredible bonus. Ji-Yong had this way of making you feel like he and you were the only two people in the room; like no one else mattered. The way he’d speak to you was as if all of his attention was centered on you and nothing and no one could change that. Figures, someone that good looking and as exceedingly charming as he was would make one feel that way the way he’d look at you was the way that one could only dream of; it was no wonder why so many people around the world fawned over him. But alas came the realization that she wasn’t special and he wasn’t somehow falling in love with the ugly duckling he just simply took pity. That pity turned eventually to friendship. When he had finally showed up with a girlfriend one day she knew he was too good to be true. But so it goes.

She was used to living vicariously through her friends romantic relationships. She just wished that for once if there were some higher being that they’d give her a break and let her find someone that would let her give her whole heart to them and receive their love right back. More specifically speaking, if it were Jae-Won; if she could magically make her childhood crush see her in a different light maybe then she’s have a chance. Forget anyone else she just wanted to be with the image of Jae-Won that she had built up in her head. She may have had crushes here and there on other guys but her heart always came back to him. Ji-Yong and the others were just something nice to look at occasionally.

“You choked”

“I did not choke!”

“Yes you did!” he smiled “you had the guy right in front of you and you turned into jelly”

“Oh, as if you’ve never felt that way for a girl you liked” she crossed her arms.

“Nope never” he smirked.

“Pfft, yeah right”

“Look this isn’t about me, this about how the guy you’ve been pining over since you were a teenager for a second looked at you like he was ready to eat a full course meal and then you started sweating like you were in a sauna and turned into fucking ‘Rain Man’ telling him how you got Ramin Karimloo to sign your ‘Phantom of the Opera’ playbill last summer”

She stared at him for a moment before opening her mouth to speak “okay, I may have choked a little...”

“I think a little is a bit of an understatement in your case”

“Okay and you saying that I was flailing like a passenger from Titanic in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean is an overstatement and quite frankly insensitive” she quirked her head “too soon to be making those kinds of jokes don’t you think?”

“It’s been over a hundred years!” he threw up his hands.

“Too soon” she pointed at him.

“Bonjour Madame et Monsieur, my name is Jacques I shall be your server tonight. Can I get you started with anything to drink?” the waiter set down wine glasses on the table.

“Yes thank you can we have a bottle of the best Cabernet Sauvignon you’ve got please” Ji-Yong smiled.

“And for your girlfriend Monsieur? The Cabernet as well?”

“Oh she’s not my girlfriend” he laughed “just good friends”

She bit the inside of her bottom lip trying to mask how hard his insignificant comment hurt and how quickly he responded to the waiter without hesitation.

“I’ll just have a water, no ice please” she forced a smile.

“On second thought--” he mumbled to himself “come on babe, no wine this time? We are celebrating our anniversary after all right? Got to set the mood for later tonight” Ji-Yong winked smirking as he reached out to hold her hand she had resting on the table.

The waiter awkwardly chuckled “ah, congratulations”

‘Oh, not good enough to actually date me but I am good enough to play a prank on the waiter...’ she thought.

“Water. No ice” she glared at him as she snatched her hand away from under his.

“Erm, Oui Madame et Monsieur I will return shortly”  the waiter hurriedly took his leave before anymore awkward animosity could come out of their mouths.

“What the hell was that about?” Ji-Yong chuckled.

“Me?! What the hell are you doing?” she furrowed her brows.

“Oh come on it’s just a little fun” the smirk never seeming to falter from his face.

“Yeah at my expense”

“Just a joke babe”

“And I told you to stop calling me that!” she huffed “what are you gonna do next make out with me in front of the waiter?!”

“If that makes it more convincing then sure why not?” his eyes dropped down at her lips before making eye contact again.

She could feel the intensity of her heart pounding against her chest and an unbelievable urge to douse herself in ice cold water so no one would notice how hot her cheeks had gone and that it had made that feeling return of standing in the middle of a sauna in a heavy winter coat while wearing layers upon layers of clothing

“Look at you! I was just messing with you” he chuckled “I wouldn't kiss you--”

“Gee, thanks for the ego boost” she scoffed.

“I didn’t mean it like that” he reached across the table attempting again to hold the hand she rested on the table before she snatched her purse off the table as she stood up.

“Yeah, yeah I know what you meant” she began hastily walking toward the emergency exit.

“Wait where are you going?!” he called back from the table making people sitting around him stare.

“I'll be at the studio writing the next big hit about how my complete lack of allure shot the dating horse in the face” she yelled back as the heavy door closed behind her.

“But they haven’t even brought out the drinks!” he cleared his throat as he looked around at all the eyes staring back at him “sorry..”

“Eh, Monsieur” the waiter cleared his throat.

“Hmm?” Ji-Yong turned to face him.

“Since you and Madame are celebrating your anniversary I thought I would bring you our finest wine” he forced a smile “should I wait for Madame to come back?”

“No, Jacques I don’t think she’s coming back”

“Non? Wh-what happened?”

“She’s leaving me Jacques” Ji-Yong said nonchalantly.

“Leaving you?” he quirked an eyebrow as he took her seat and began pouring Ji-Yong a glass full of wine.

“Thank you” Ji-Yong took a sip of the wine “yeah, it’s such a shame too, I just hope the kids don’t take it too hard”

“Oh Mon Dieu, not the children” Jacques gasped.

“Cheers to that my friend”

“Was there another man?”

“Yeah, just too bad she couldn’t even say hello to him”