#agatha's out there fooling around with psycho bitches | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

nonbaznary · 4 years ago

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Carry On Countdown 2020 - Day 01: Found Family

AO3 // Fanfiction Online // Keep reading on Tumblr below the cut !

Words: 1010

Snowflakes: “The gang decorates Simon and Penelope's apartment. Nostalgia, feelings and, at last, happiness.”

Rating: General Audiences

Archive Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Category: Gen

Relationships: Penelope Bunce & Simon Snow, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow, Penelope Bunce & Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Penelope Bunce & Simon Snow & Agatha Wellbelove, Penelope Bunce & Agatha Wellbelove, Simon Snow & Agatha Wellbelove, Penelope Bunce & Shepard, Shepard & Agatha Wellbelove, Shepard & Simon Snow

Characters: Simon Snow, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Penelope Bunce, Agatha Wellbelove, Shepard (Simon Snow), Fiona Pitch

Additional Tags: Post-Book 2: Wayward Son, No Angst, in this house we're ignoring Any Way The Wind Blows and the angst from Wayward Son, Fluff, Found Family, Penelope Bunce & Simon Snow Friendship, THEY'RE SIBLINGS YOUR HONOR, Christmas Decorations, Nonbinary Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch (If You Squint), They/Them Pronouns for Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Feelings, maybe a little angsty but don't worry everyone's happy and alive, Domestic, Domestic Bliss, Simon Snow cooks

Snowflakes

The Holiday fever had turned Bunce/Snow residence into absolute chaos.

People everywhere (not in a good way), boxes and more boxes of decorations in every room, two trees in the living room because of miscommunications. Trying to organize everything would be completely pointless.

Penelope and Simon couldn’t be happier, though.

It’s amazing how much can change in a few years. Seventh year Simon and Penny wouldn’t ever, not in a billion years, thinking this is how they would spend Christmas in a few years. Living together, with a vampire insisting on buying them decorations, Agatha and her Californian tan hanging mistletoes around the apartment, and an Omahan Normal carrying around Christmas lights.

It was hard to deal with the shock that came with it, but they were decided to try and make it work. This Christmas was going to be amazing. That much was guaranteed. They were all alive, and together, and happy. That was the greatest gift of all.

Simon tried to not space out while decorating. Christmas used to be a tough time for him. It still was, of course, in many ways. But he was way more focused on the good thing now. How his family was right there with him, how he was surrounded by love, and all those people who he cared about were alive, despite all chances. In one second, he was hanging a Santa doll in the kitchen’s door, then, suddenly, he was thinking about all the good memories all of them had made those past years, smiling like a fool. He used to think he wouldn’t survive long enough to have this. True happiness.

— Earth to Simon?— Penelope snapped her fingers in front of his smiley face.— I need help with tree number two. Do you think Fiona could take it to her place?

That only made Simon’s smile grow bigger.

— She would never.— he chuckled.— I’ll ask Baz to do it anyways. They live there too, maybe they can convince her to keep it for a while. Or at least try.

— Thanks. Let me know when she finds out, I’d love to catch the Christmas Special of “Pitch maniac murders nephew and their boyfriend over a Christmas tree in her living room”.

— Don’t be foolish, Bunce.— Baz emerged from the dining room.— In her version of the story, the title would say “Pitch maniac murders nephew and nephew-in-law”. Fi might be a psycho, and a bitch, but she recognizes Snow as part of the family. Isn't that right, love?— they smirked, giving Simon a quick cheek kiss, then heading to the rooms.— And everybody knows she wouldn't directly murder us, she'd simply light the apartment on fire. It's the Pitch signature move.

— So you're saying the Pitch signature move for dealing with problems is... Arson?— Simon asked cheekily, retrieving the cheek kiss.

— Precisely, darling. You know it. Now, Bunce, where do I put this damned box, again? I swear, all I do around here is carry your boxes.

— You carry the boxes because you have superstrength, you numpty. And you bought at least half of those! They're your problem.— Baz rolled their eyes at her.— Okay, okay. Just put this one in my bed, please. And if you could tell Shepard to come h- — but Baz was already gone.

— Trouble in paradise?— Agatha, however, was just getting there. She had gone out to get ingredients for Simon’s Christmas cookies. He snapped them out of her hands as soon as he could. He'd found great comfort in cooking, opposed to simply trying to eat his problems away.— Don’t worry, I’ll let “Beautiful Nebraska” over there know you’re looking for him.

— He’s insisting on putting reindeer imagery everywhere. I just found a Rudolph figure in my bathroom, I swear to Morgana. I’m starting to think he’s convinced reindeer are magickal creatures or something.

— Every family needs a lunatic, huh?— Agatha winks.— By the way, I need more mistletoes, I’m making hats.

— We have plenty of lunatics here, thank you very much.— Pen scoffs.

— What kind of hats are you making, Aggie?— Simon frowned.— Why would you need mistletoes-

— I’m making mistletoe hats.

— Mis-what, now?

— Mistletoe hats, twit. You know, hats with mistletoe hanging off them? So you can kiss anyone you want? Christmas humor?

— Oh. Sounds weird. I mean- Nice? I don’t really get the whole “mistletoe” deal.

Agatha chuckled, shaking her head.

— Sure, Si. Where are they, anyway?

— The mistletoe box is in the living room, and so is Shep, send him inside for me?— Pen interfered.

— Gotcha.

Simon waited a bit, until Agatha was away from them.

— Penny.— he started.

— Yes, Simon?

— What are you doing here, again?

Penelope frowned.

— I came to talk to you about the tree, remember?

He smiled softly.

— Sure, but when you’re on "organizer-Penny mode" you never stick around for too long.

She smiled right back at him, and took a deep breath. She caught Simon’s warm hand between hers.

— I’m trying to allow myself to enjoy this. Even the mess. Merlin, especially the mess. I thought we’d never have a family holiday like this. I thought-

— We wouldn’t live past eighth year?— he cleared his throat, his smile a bit sadder, and squeezed the hand below his.— Yeah. Me too. I mean, you know that.

— We did, though. We lived through everything and now, as punishment,— she joked.— I have to babysit a dragon boy, his vampire boyfriend, that Californian English phenomenon over there, and an American Normal.

— Not so Normal, Pen. Oh, and don’t forget the psycho aunt.

— Of course, how could I?— Penny laughed.— I wouldn’t trade this for anything in the world, though, you know that. I love our immature, chaotic little family.

— Me too, Penny. It’s the best I could’ve asked for. Ever. Really.

— Aw, shucks, you got me all emotional now. But you deserve this, all of this, goldilocks.

He kissed her forehead and let go of her hand to hug her shoulders.

— Call me that again,— he whispered.— and I won’t give you any Santa cookies, you arsehole.

[my other works for the countdown]

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blorbosexterminator · 3 years ago

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So we are halfway through the finale season and......

Well,

Let my review say everything to you, so, here you go :

Alberto 😡😡😡😡😡. That motherfucker just went psycho, didnt he? Blind in rage & just wants to snatch his daughter like a trophy 😡😡😡😡😡

Man I wish someone would just shoot him, like blow his brains off yaar, you will be doing the world a favour.

Poor Daniel 🙁 He be dumb, but he have sense.

“Where were you, papá?” Daniel asks, leaning against the wall.

Ooooh the roles just reversed 😈

Senor Ramos, please tell everything to your son, he'll not judge you or else it'll be too late and wont end for anyone.

Whatever it is, I’ll do it. You’re old and you’re sick,” he cries out, not exactly knowing what he’s signing up for, but it doesn’t matter. But his father only chuckles at that.

“I’m not kidding!” He wasn’t, but he realizes he doesn’t feel any of the excitement he usually does when getting into anything new.

Daniel 😢😢😢 He ready to do anything for his dad (& Monica)

Daniel 🤦‍♀️ please, atleast ask Monica, dude, come on, I know she'll say yes but please just ask her.

I love how Daniel's thoughts go off-tangent from I'm not kidding to hearing Agatha, aka interrogator of everyone's sexuality, complain bout expensive diapers 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. Such a mood, bruh, such a mood.

“Daniel!” his father screams, suddenly in front of him. “What have you gotten yourself into?”

“Nothing,” he smiles. If his father won’t let him do it, then he’ll go to Marquina himself.

Senor Ramos :

Daniel :

(The look of every parent when they know their kid is stirring up trouble)

(Also, also, I have a theory :

What if by the time Daniel goes to Sergio, he is about to lead a rescue mission and recruits him (and also Julia)?? 😱😱😱😱😱

Nada, I swear if that happens, like you know a rescue+shootout from an action film, I have a special song that I'll dedicate to it, IF YOU CAN, please make it happen)

Martín has managed to identify the car and get the route through the cctv Silene brought

Hmmmmm 🤔

Sergio is a son of a bitch, but he’s a smart son of a bitch. Together, they could find them. Everything could be dealt with after. He just needs to make sure he’s safe.

*Careless Whispers by George Michael plays in background* 😈😈😈

By the time Martín arrived, he saw Alberto and Sergio physically fighting on the road, in the utter darkness of night.

S2 deja vu 😏

Martín saw Alberto take out his gun, and even with his back to him, Martín could tell he wasn’t merely threatening. Martín jolted up at the first shot, he couldn’t tell exactly what happened or where he shot him, but he heard Sergio’s groan and could tell it wasn’t deadly, from Alberto raising it again.

*stares in horror and fear* *holds breath*

But Martín didn’t give him a chance. The next shot was directly at Alberto’s head. He collapsed as easily as a fly on top of Sergio,

Hang on......

MY WISH HAS COME TRUE!!!!!!!!

Martin, baby, my sweetie, my darling, I am so proud of you.

Martin really went boom boom ciao, didnt he? 🤣🤣🤣

🎶I'm gonna take you down

Oh, down, down, down

So, don't you fool around

I'm gonna pull it, pull it, pull the trigger🎶

(Shoot to Thrill by AC/DC)

“My hand, he shot through it, did you send him?”

ARE YOU KIDDING ME SERGIO?! WHAT KIND OF AN IDIOT ASSHOLE ARE YOU?!

Also, as chemistry student, I just noticed smth. If they threw him in a tub of acid, they would've gotten some blisters from the splashes, so if they dont wanna get caught, they should heal them asap. And also, did they get rid of the blood from the road, car & their clothes?

I can’t afford time, not now,” he paused, sighed, and opened the faucet to wash his hands. “And—” he took a deep breath, “——something tells me that when all of this is over, Andrés and I—he will lose me, and I’ll lose him too, but he—I won’t cost him his brother too,” he turned to look at him and Sergio was standing still, just listening.

He laughed, bitterly. “"It was always either me or you, Sergio. Either me or you, but not both of us. I won't cause him this grief."

WHY?! 😭 WHY?!?! 😭😭WHY?!?!? 😭😭😭

Martin always sacrifices everything and helps Sergio, but that bastard never, ever, returns the favour!!!

My dog : *hands me a tissue box*

Me : *softly* Thank you 🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧

Okay, Good Night and I'll see you tomorrow.

Hello again, Kal!

Oh yeah he did, he went absolutely nuts. You'll be happy with the end of the episode then!

The turned tables! Who would have thought Daniel would end up the one with common sense!

No one has to keep secrets, but yet they do. Because it's a telenovela.

Daniel's priorities are his father and Monica and he's right.

Just give him time, he's getting there!

You know you're ready to be a father when you hear diaper complaints in your head.

Perfect reactions, those are the exact faces.

I think you're gonna be happy with what's coming!

She's being useful!!

Yess!

Okay yes I'm proud of him as well. Another thing I wanted to write from the beginning lmfao.

Oh yes, don't fuck with Martín!

The guy just had a man try to kill him agabsh he could be a little jarred.

True, but what are blisters with like everything else happening. Well, I hope they did.

Martín and Sergio really had a moment there, didn't they?

Well, this is like the first time he ever does anything for Sergio afajshhs

Your dog is a hero. Here taking care of us all.

Good night! And thank you so much once again, Kal!

#A Spanish Tale #Ramadan Telenovela

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