#again this is no hate to anyone and I love that people are writing what they want

[skyfallscotland]

Quicksilver, by Callie Hart 🦋

She is moonlight. The mist that shrouds the mountains. The bite of electricity in the air before a storm.

Ohh boy. Personally I think she is none of those things, but that's me getting ahead of myself. God, I feel so anxious posting a book reaction after the Onyx Storm Debacle, but here we are, with a book I didn't love...again.

So...I started this one with a running commentary again (Throne of Glass style) but I couldn't quite commit. We will however approach it chronologically, because that's an easier way to show my thoughts as they evolved.

Would I recommend this book? No. And I’ll tell you why, but there are spoilers ahead so be aware of that.

Friends...I did not enjoy this one and I'm starting to feel like a crazy person. Is this just a massive reading slump? Or am I weird? Because everyone seems to think these books are the best thing since sliced bread and I've not liked a single one of them 😭

My first impressions? Saeris is so cliché. Like oh we're starving and can barely survive, you can see my ribs, but actually I can scale a giant wall and fight all these fully trained guards and win...ok, sure. It's giving 00's YA vibes but alright, I'm rolling with it.

I had no understanding of what it was I was doing, but if this was a world-ending gift, then good. Fuck this city and fuck this world. My family was already doomed, and what did I care for anyone else?

Bit dramatic, but whatever, I'll still ride with you. Who am I to judge? I did write Remi.

“I wear pants. Shirts. Things I can move easily in. So I can run, and climb, and—” Kill people.

"So cliché." I mutter to myself as I put the book down. Then pick it up again. Then put it down again and use the audiobook instead.

At some point, Layne would accept that I just didn't eat that much, and she'd stop loading up my plate with so much food. She'd slip an apple into her pocket for me or something.

*Deep breaths* Saeris would absolutely fit in on mid 2000's tumblr. Babe, this is such a weird flex to include when you’ve already made it very clear she was a starving orphan, ok?

We also met the infamous Carrion—more on that later—and her brother...who sucks. No two ways about it. I hated him immediately. Are there any decent book-brothers out there? Or just...no? I thought from the way he was acting he was going to be fourteen but no, he's like TWENTY, what the fuck 😭

So anyway, hooray! We've fallen through a portal to a new world and that's the stage set—then we meet Kingfisher. Oh man. Kingfisher.

Firstly:

This is a kingfisher. I just want y’all to know that. I know it’s not his ‘real’ name but it’s still what she’s crying out in rapture ok, a choice was made and it wasn’t a good one.

Anyway, surprise surprise, he's an asshole, but here’s the rub: he doesn't seem redemptive.

My jaw was screaming, I was clenching my teeth so hard. “Fuck—you—” “There you go again. Hungry, needy little bitch in heat, begging to be fucked…” he taunted. “Let. Go!”

I’m ok with enemies to lovers, but there has to be a hint at least that the ‘bad guy’ can be a decent person. There has to be something that hooks me about him—his entire personality can’t just be ‘asshole’, and above all, despite the fact he doesn’t like the FMC (even loathes her for all I care) he has to at least have some basic respect for her, otherwise I’m not down. That’s just my personal take, you don’t have to agree, but it makes me uncomfortable otherwise.

“I don't hate your kind. I'm just disappointed by how breakable you are. If I held you down and fucked you the way I'm imagining fucking you right now, I doubt that you’d survive it.”

Like that? That’s not cute or arousing in any way.

“That your body is betraying you in other ways. That I can smell you, Little Osha, and I'm thinking about drinking the sweet nectar you're making for me straight from the fucking cup.”

I do also think the smut was just not for me in this book, as a general rule, I did find it very cringe. Case in point ^

A FUNNY INTERLUDE:

—a look of rye amusement on his irritatingly handsome face.

LMAO this was meant to be wry, I assume? There were a few instances like this throughout the book, as well as typos and missing punctuation. Which, we’re all human, I get it, but it kind of annoys me a little when this was picked up for trad pub, pulled from KU (I bought it—twice!) and has since gotten a million dollar Netflix deal. Please, if we’re going to be doing that, the publishing house needs to edit the damn book. Honestly? I think it could have done with 200-300 less pages. A developmental edit was needed, let alone a final edit.

Anyway. Onwards.

So they make a blood pact, in which she agrees to basically do whatever the fuck he says, which is...tired. I'm tired. The book is tired. We're all a little tired here.

Kingfisher held out his hand and pulled me to my feet, making a derisive sound when he saw the cut I'd inflicted upon myself. “Baby.”

It’s just...this utter derision he has for her, his supposed (spoiler alert!) fated mate, that just gives me the ick.

Then there's this:

Kingfisher stunned me to silence when he dropped to his knees and started picking up the shards of broken cup. “It's all right, Archer. Hush, it's all right.”

Ok, this here is the first indication we get that he can be a decent person, and it’s not with her, it’s with some random character we’ve just met. Do I grow to like Archer? Sure, but right now I don’t know him from Adam, all this scene tells me is that Fisher is capable of respect and kindness, just not with Saeris. Be so for fucking real right now, that does not make you want to root for them. If this were your bestie you’d be screaming for them to run. This is the crux of it all. We had to get like 300 pages into this book for there to be a single hint of redemption in him and to me that's bad technique.

Clearly everyone else disagrees since they're out there praising it, but I've nearly DNF'd so many times by now, because you're 👏 not 👏 giving 👏 me 👏 crumbs. Please, give the reader something! It's all well and good for people to be out here going "well he's like that for a reason" (spoiler alert: the reason sucks, it's just the cliché 'I wanted to push her away for her own safety) but his reasoning means shit if people lose interest and don't get far enough to find out what it even is.

Note: by 'people' I mean the rest of the internet, not anyone here specifically, but since a few of you have said the same, just know that's a generalisation and I still love you! But I fear my point stands, his change of heart/any indication of kindness comes too late in the game for it to be an effective character arc (more on this later!!)

Anywho—

I shouldn't have moaned. I definitely shouldn't have told him that I wanted him. For the love of all the gods in all the heavens, why had I said that? I was going to throw up.

Same babe. Why did you? Why do you?

I couldn't believe we'd finally arrived here.

Me either!! 56% of the way in! We've basically done absolutely nothing but wander around and talk about how hot and mean he is for 300 pages but finally you're...doing things...with him 😬

Every part of me wanted to scramble from the bed and bolt for the door, but I knew that would be folly. Just like a hell cat, Fisher would give chase.

So terrified every part of you wants to bolt for the door...charming. Very hot. Love that for you.

“I could probably use a sho—” “Do not fucking dare finish that sentence,” he snarled. “I don't want a mouthful of soap and perfume. I want to taste you.”

Shower. She was going to say shower.

Another note, because I'm incapable of not shouting this from the rooftops when the occasion arises—vaginas are self-cleaning, there should be no soap or perfume going in there! You would have tasted her anyway you dumbass. You'd think he'd know that, given he's supposedly been in more of them than your local gynaecologist.

“And we can’t lie.”

*deep breaths* since WHEN? And that only makes it worse??

I'd imagined the words. Fabricated them out of thin air and somehow played them aloud in my own head in his voice.

Oh, hey Violet, how did you get here?

So anyway, then we enter the final conflict? Confrontation? Where she needs to go and save her newfound mate from under the mountain the bad guy's place! (oh and there's vampires, did I mention that before? No? Well there is now).

Anyway, turns out Rhysand Kingfisher was trapped there for 110 years with big bad Malcolm, who it's implied sexually assaulted him during that time, but we never address that. Why? Well this is romantasy and we only have six-hundred pages, why would we? Just throw traumatic experiences in there for the sake of it, why not?

Anyway—

“That's right. Fifty-five. He spent the next eight years trying to find the coin once he reached the center, didn't you, my love?”

I'm?????

55+8=63... what happened to the other 47 years? Guys? I'm????

Whatever, who cares about math! We're on the escape until—WOAH.

“It can't see or hear you. It tracks movement.”

Don't panic, don't panic, we all know how to defeat the middengard wyrm whatever that thing is! And we do. But not really, because everything in this maze regenerates, just like romantasy plotlines.

More fighting, more evil villain monologuing, etc.

THEN Saeris has to go and find a coin to break the blood oath Kingfisher made with big-bad, even though big-bad said he broke it himself five minutes ago during his evil monologue in order to make Fishie confess to...things.

“I release you from your oath to us, Kingfisher, Bane of Gillethrye. Now, go on. Tell your friends all about the deal you struck with us all those years ago.”

But no matter, we're off to find a coin and no worries, we've got that down! Of course in the process Feyre Saeris dies and gets brought back to life again as an all powerful fae/vampire queen hybrid. WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT?

Not me, even I couldn't have predicted that double-doozy. Probably this guy though:

Zareth. God of Chaos.

Which? NO. Nope. No. Too late. FAR too late in the game for this. I'm out.

The way we went through so many boring pages of nothingness to this in the last 20% is truly something.

OK! SIDE CHARACTERS:

Danya was a complete and total waste of everyone's time, she existed only to be the bitchy, elitist mean girl side character who was mean to poor Saeris and occassionally made her jealous. This one-dimensional treatment of female characters grinds my gears. Even Everlayne, Kingfisher's sister was entirely useless, making Saeris the special female unicorn. Pretty sure this book fails the Bechdel test.

Ren was nice, I liked him, poor long-suffering man that he was.

Lorreth. Man, y'all can't shut up about Carrion and you're really sleeping on Lorreth. This man saved me from DNF'ing, he was fantastic. Put some respect on his name! 10/10 no notes. The guy you'd actually want to get with if this book were real.

He'd still looked dumbstruck as he headed off in the direction of his tent, cradling Avisiéth like a baby in his arms.

Carrion. CARRION. Ok straight up...is that really a word we want to be using as a name? Really? Is it relevant? Like did we do that on purpose because he somehow reflects roadkill? I figured we'd find out, but NOPE 💀

Who fucking knows at this point though whether it is his name. I doubt it, given Kingfisher's name is apparently not Kingfisher either. Personally though I still think that should have been addressed in the book. It's over 200k words, you can tell us why certain nicknames exist.

The thief held up his hands. “You're right. I apologize. I'm just a little on edge right now. I'm not my best self.”

Hilarious, there to cause trouble most of the time, 10/10, almost no notes.

“Are you going to tell me about my parents, or are you going to start undressing each other? Because I can leave. I don't have to, but I can,” Carrion said.

Except the part where he turns out to be a thousand-year-old fae too and a secret, mystery, vampire-killing-prince dude or whatever, there's a note about that and how it's kinda unnecessary to drop in the final 5%. Was it foreshadowed? Not effectively, no. Also Carrion Daianthus? Roadkill, crows, and...pink flowers? Yeah. That's him. That's the one 💀

Onyx. Token wild animal taken in as pet/familiar trope. She can have this one. He's cute.

Elroy. Dude's definitely going to become important again. How much do we wanna bet he's Fisher's dad? Anyone?

Anyway, this was wildly chaotic and I don't really feel bad about it because so was this book. It started out well in the first 5-10%. It was a slog to read between the 10% mark and 60%. Honestly, it only got better once they'd fucked for the first time, which was because Kingfisher's character did a 180 overnight with a big fat handwavey motion, like our FMC's magic coochie cured him of his violent tendencies. Like not to be crude, but I'm not sure there's any other way of putting it.

I think it's just not a great book, which I also think is a shame because the world is interesting, I loved the parts of alchemy we got (which weren't enough, imo) and the swords, the magic, the portals, the quicksilver, etc. I think it had so much potential and that's ultimately why it also bothers me so much as well. It feels squandered through a lack of refinement and editing.

Will I read the next one? Maybe. I'll let someone else take the hit first and see if it's any better paced this.

This has gone on long enough lmao, so I'll just leave you with one last quote that I think really sums up this book so, so much:

“Not that. The brother part,” she said in a loud whisper. “That’s not common knowledge?” “Well, yes. And no. It's just not spoken about. And it's very, very complicated.”

Yeah...

[generic-sonic-fan]

Hi!

When I read your fics I was amazed how you write team dark and their dynamic. I was wondering, since I would like to write about them as well, but am struggling with really getting them to feel like actual people.

Do you have any tricks or things you keep in mind when writing Omega? And on top of that, what do you keep in mind when writing Rouge or Shadow? How do you make these three fit so well? Like three puzzle pieces that kind of have the right shape but still don’t quite align.

I’m sorry if this is a big ask, I’m just quite curious, you have written them so well in Mirror Verse and other one shots like CTRL + ALT + DELETE. Can’t help but ask for the secrets of the master :)

I am so honored by this question and you've also activated my trap card. I LOVE talking about how I see these guys and the vibes I keep in mind for each of them while writing.

The TL;DR:

Team Dark are a group of three mutually beneficial friends who regard each other as equals, even if they occasionally disagree/fight. In my opinion, if this is missing, you're no longer writing Team Dark, but "Rouge and her two dogs" or "IDW Shadow and his no good very bad mandates" or whatever. This is my most controversial opinion.

For Omega, he's the boisterous rebel of the group. He helps keep their momentum going at all times, and tends to be a driving force in conversations and the instigator of new actions.

For Shadow, he's the serious anchor of the team. He helps keep Team Dark together, tending to be the one most willing to let his true emotions show, whether that be his attachment to them or his real opinions on a situation.

For Rouge, she's the charismatic tactician of the team. She helps point Team Dark in a direction, tending to outline the circumstances and situations they find themselves in to help the other two understand better.

To use tropes, they're all Lancers for each other. Ideally, each one of them can be compared and contrasted against each other- not just Shadow and Rouge vs Omega or Shadow and Omega vs Rouge.

To move onto individual breakdowns of how I see each of them and how they fit together- LONG post beneath the cut! You have been warned! Oh, and the actual writing advice is at the bottom because I got carried away, oops.

Omega:

The basis-

The very core of my writing for Omega comes down to three points, which I will reiterate here for convenience. Omega:

Hates Eggman

Will do ANYTHING to avoid being ignored and overlooked again

uses the first point to cover up the second point and would sooner deactivate than admit it

This is, in my humble opinion, what motivates Omega in almost everything he does. He's loud and boisterous. Why? Because he hates being silenced! He's violent and dangerous. Why? Because the idea of being (and being seen) as powerless makes him furious.

Omega's greatest desires, outwardly manifested by his drive to kill his creator, are about choice and freedom for himself. If he wants to do something, he does it. Flat out. Or in the very rare cases of his restraint, he will make it explicitly clear that he is choosing not to for a reason that still benefits him in the long run. This robot has a pathological need for control over his life, and god help anyone who dares threaten that.

That control includes control over his image- he's a deeply prideful individual. Getting him to admit a mistake is like pulling (metaphorical) teeth. Shadow and Rouge are more likely to apologize than he ever will be. He can't stand being perceived as weak, inconsistent, or incompetent.

He's much more of a liar than Shadow ever could be. I've heard the phrase "still waters run deep", and I think that describes Omega perfectly. Like all the other members of Team Dark, he is extremely guarded with his more vulnerable emotions. Whereas Rouge's cover emotion is a flirty suaveness, and Shadow's cover emotion is aloof determination, Omega's cover emotion is a sort of joyous rage. He wants to be seen either as A. Angry or B. Having the time of his life. Good luck getting him to express anything else. (Even in front of Shadow and Rouge!)

But the important part is that he does feel the full range of emotions. And he accepts that he feels all those things, even if you couldn't get him to confess it out loud. I myself tend to accidentally write Omega as more philosophical than I think he needs to be, but that doesn't negate the fact that he does care about things that he pretends not to! How people treat him vs how they treat his organic teammates, his role as the (not quite) only friendly robot in his universe, so on. He has a curiosity about the world around him that someone who was isolated from it might have. And yes, there's actual canon evidence for this now- he spends all of Shadow's campaign in Sonic x Shadow generations making remarks and generating conclusions about the world around him, not just about Eggman robots.

Omega has such a zeal for life that he's not himself without it. He cares. He cares. He cares. Make him have strong opinions on everything.

Fitting into Team Dark:

Omega fits into Team Dark as their catalyst. The definition of "catalyst" is "a substance that increases the rate of a chemical reaction without itself undergoing any permanent chemical change".

Omega is the one always spurring Shadow and Rouge into motion, and he's the one that forces them into conflict- not against each other, but against the world, and their preconceptions of just about everything. He's the one asking "WHY NOT?" whenever they say they can't do something, "WHO CARES?" whenever they worry too much about anything. He's got too much drive to ever sit idly by, and being friends with him requires at least some level of reciprocation of that energy.

The biggest way Omega shows that he cares is simply by his presence. Shadow and Rouge understand that if Omega did not want to be here, he wouldn't be. Tolerating their own problems and eccentricities is their biggest ask from him. Given that "their problems" usually tend to be far outside his skill range, he's always a bit unsure of how to solve them. And of course, as we covered previously, he hates feeling or seeming unsure.

. . . but he does want to solve them. Because he cares.

He's the most classically tsundere out of all of them. It took him the longest out of all of them to figure out that he did genuinely care about them, but now that he does. . . he's not quite sure how to navigate it? Relationships are still new to him, give him time. The line where "WANTING TO MAINTAIN TEAMMATE EFFECTIVENESS" separates from "SEEING MY TEAMMATE IN DISTRESS MAKES ME DISTRESSED" is really fuzzy for him.

So he tries. He's one to face their problems like he does every other problem- head on. It's moments like this where his own clarity and certainty of character can cut through the fog of a problem that the other two are overcomplicating.

---

He's most similar to Shadow in their shared bluntness and need to feel like they're accomplishing their goals. They're both impulsive. They're both guys who ask "well why don't we just do X" and then they go run off to do X, even if it's already been tried and found to not work by someone before them. They share a mistrust of the competency of others.

He's most unlike Shadow in the fact that Shadow masks, heavily, while he does not. Shadow keeps quiet and tries to blend in with "normal" people. Omega does not, from his appearance to the way he acts. He embraces his differences while Shadow struggles with them. Omega is much more certain in his identity than Shadow will ever be.

---

He's most similar to Rouge in their shared nonchalance for consequences. Rouge is barely, barely governed by the idea that it would be harder to do what she wants if the cops are after her. Omega has come to agree with this philosophy. I've always headcanoned them as being far more morally questionable than Shadow would ever let himself be. They're also both go-getters. When they see something they want, they get it, even if the methods they employ to do so differ.

He's most unlike Rouge in that Rouge loves to play the "game" of society. She gets joy out of playing the fool sometimes and allowing people to underestimate her, something Omega would never tolerate even if he did see the value of such a play. This extends to her proclivity for stealth and anonymity- she doesn't mind having the last laugh over someone in private, whereas for Omega, what's the point if nobody knows that you won?

Shadow:

The basis:

Shadow is a character that I have the most difficulty describing how I write. Probably because, for fuck's sake, he's Shadow the Hedgehog. Everybody knows Shadow. Everybody writes about Shadow. And everybody writes about Shadow differently yet they all feel like the same guy. He is "all of him", and in a manner almost similar to Metal Sonic, there's so many different ways you can portray him yet still have it feel right.

Here is just about the only post I've made about how I write Shadow. It's a bit rambly, but I still stand by it. My favorite paragraph from it is probably this one-

At his best, Shadow is thoughtful, neutral, and surprisingly level-headed. Impulse only gets the best of him when he perceives himself as being the only one who can act competently- if a situation "needs" an Ultimate Lifeform, he's the first to run in and try to solve it. Otherwise, he's much more methodical than the likes of Sonic, Amy, Omega, etc. He values efficiency over fun or flashiness. He's not very good at putting himself in other people's shoes, but if you want an objective opinion on a situation at hand he's one of your best bets to ask.

For me, Shadow is someone who values being stoic and being there for the people who need him. One of his innate desires, one that he consistently struggles with, is to be the perfect tool for the people he cares about. He wants to solve their problems. Ease their pain. Fulfill their wishes about the world. I always thought that his very first line in SA2 to Eggman, about "granting his wish" was very resonant to him both pre- and post-Maria.

Shadow knows that he has the tendency to follow the directions of others, and it's something he fights within himself. He pushes himself to be independent to the point of overcorrecting and putting everyone off. He also has a tendency to form attachments, deeply, and this too is something that he tries to suppress and avoid showing (for Maria-related reasons).

Ultimately, Shadow is the most honest character of Team Dark. His struggles with who he is and his own mental health are too big for him to fight alone- as a result, he's forced to share them. He tries so hard to deny parts of him to himself that he ends up spilling everything everywhere. Shadow tries, and does a decent job in front of strangers, but among friends he just can't hide. He is all of him.

(This ironically results in him being the 'token mentally ill one' of Team Dark when I write him, lol! He's the one who's had to put the work in because of his PTSD, and it shows! He's got more emotional maturity than either Omega or Rouge because he's had to develop it to keep moving forward with his life.)

Fitting into Team Dark:

Shadow is the anchor of Team Dark. He helps ground Omega and Rouge to the world. He's by far the most philosophical and spiritual of the three- he's the only one thinking about stuff like his purpose, his future, his role in life, what he's meant to be, etc. He's a thinker, and sometimes Omega and Rouge need that sort of anchor to the bigger picture to stay themselves.

He is honest and he is earnest. He says what he means, and means what he says. He provides the best evaluations of the current situation. He's almost like the "canary in the coal mine"- if something is going wrong, if the Team or anybody in it starts to lose their way, Shadow is the first to speak up.

He might not be the one to start the conversation, but he is the first one to really talk, and this helps the others open up. The most important thing is that he doesn't even realize he's doing it. He's not self-aware enough to be a facilitator or mediator in any capacity, but he is the stabilizer of the three regardless.

. . . which some might call ironic, given the fact that it's Rouge and Omega helping him stay level when it comes to his erratic mental health. He does lean on them when he gets triggered. He needs to. And sometimes he needs someone to talk him out of his own spiral when he thinks too much. Omega and Rouge help him to unwind from the tight little knots he binds himself in trying to sort out himself.

Saying that Shadow cares about them is like saying that Shadow cares about breathing. It's effortless. Natural. He couldn't stop caring about them now if he tried. It's just the way he's wired. The biggest way that he shows this is by doing things for them and worrying about them. Both in silence, of course.

---

He's most similar to Omega in his potential for ruthlessness and a stubbornness when they've made up their minds. They also relate through their shared otherness to the majority, being manufactured beings who have difficulty discerning the intentions and reasoning of others.

He's most unlike Omega in that he has a firm moral compass and a deep consideration for what is "intended" for him. Furthermore, conflict isn't something Shadow enjoys. Destruction? Sure. Conflict? Not really, so he avoids it for things he doesn't deem important. Omega finds disagreements refreshing, whereas for Shadow they make him feel trapped.

---

He's most similar to Rouge in that they both don't mind slowing down. They both take pleasure in the little things in life, from soft blankets to good fur care products and the like. Though Shadow is more duty-driven than her, they prefer having lives outside of their work. They both need to have periods alone to gather themselves again.

He's most unlike Rouge in that he's selfless while she's selfish. It's not even just that he's got a more heroic moral compass than her- he just fundamentally values other things more highly than he does himself. Of the entire team he's the most likely to step up to "do what's required" or "do what's right". Oh, and he's self-sacrificial to a fault, something Rouge just can't fathom.

Rouge:

Rouge is the hardest for me to write because she's the opposite of Omega in a lot of ways.

This is a bat who puts on a front for everything.

Including in her own narration.

I think my strongest POV character work for her that shows this is chapters 2 and 6 of my 2024 Team Dark Week one-shots. Both of which allude to things about her that she won't even tell the audience, as well as plenty of emotions that she kicks down so that nobody sees them.

Whereas Omega desires physical control, Rouge desires control over information. She's a string-puller, a manipulator, a planner. She's the ultimate tactician, and she will do everything in her power to ensure that she ends up on top and her enemies end up on the bottom, crushed by her own heel if she's lucky, but she'll also settle for their destruction by anyone or anything else.

She's invested most heavily into her social skillset. She always knows the right thing to say. Conversations are if-then equations for her; if she says this, then the other person will feel that. She uses this on enemies and friends alike, and furthermore, regardless of what she might actually want to say or do in the moment.

A friend might be sad, and if she needs them to be happy, she'll console them, even if she would rather grab their shoulders and scream her frustration at them. An enemy might ask her to do something that she hates, but if it means accomplishing her goals, she'll shove that down and do it with a smile. She's flexible, adaptable, mutable, and she can track her status with each individual with ease. . .

. . . except with herself. Not to say that she isn't incredibly prideful, and that she won't stick up for herself, but sometimes the gap between what she needs to be to get the result she wants and what she's actually feeling in the moment can grow so large she disconnects them entirely. She won't just hide her emotions- she will feel ashamed of them and try to force herself not to feel them.

She's the most 'herself' when she's 'off shift', so to speak. She relaxes significantly when she's alone or with the two people on this planet that she trusts enough to do so. She actually becomes less opinionated when she's at her most casual. She can get catty or annoyed by things in this state but she much more go-with-the-flow. While she gets the most pleasure from intensive gem heists, it doesn't take much to just make her happy. A good TV show? She's happy. A fun chat with a friend? She's happy. Painted nails and a good outfit? Happy.

The catch is having the stability to stay that way, hence the impressive tangle of machinations she concocts to keep her little corner of the world totally within her control.

Fitting into Team Dark:

Most people probably were surprised by my previous section stating that Shadow was the emotional anchor of the team. Most people see Rouge that way- and that's a valid interpretation, but I prefer a different take.

Rouge is the team leader. Period. I stand by the majority of this post I made about Rouge's dynamic as the team leader. The TL;DR is that she's the planner and tactician, the expert at cognitively thinking through the best way to aim the two living weapons at her disposal. This also, however, comes with resolving the differences between them when things get heated.

She often finds herself as the one resolving conflict, not because she's the "mom friend", but that she needs these two to get along (and some external parties to get along with them!) or else a lot of her plans could fall apart, and she cannot have that. Being a part of Team Dark is one hell of a vulnerable position for her, and there's some days where she wonders if it's worth it. Being dependent on others like this freaks her out in a way that Shadow and Omega can't conceptualize.

She's always had a soft spot for Shadow and Omega given the circumstances. That much is true. But I think it's only a significant ways into her friendship with them that she resolves to stick by Shadow and Omega's sides should the world turn against them. Choosing to have someone's back instead of distancing herself the moment things become dicey is a huge sign that she genuinely cares. I believe her confession in Sonic 06, and again in SxS Gens, to be the most honest and heartfelt she's ever going to be with them. Shadow and Omega might not understand the full depth of what those moments meant for her.

---

She's most similar to Shadow in that they're both pretty grounded. A lot of the basic assumptions they make about the world and scripts for how to behave are similar between them. They feel their emotions similarly and in response to similar situations, even if Rouge tends to hide them better. They're both just. . . pretty relaxed people outside of extraordinary circumstances. Not to say they don't have moments where they get passionate and excited on their own though.

She's most unlike Shadow in that she doesn't think anything is wrong with her. For all her knowledge on people and emotions and conversation, she doesn't understand that the way she operates is pretty mentally ill, folks! She thinks that she doesn't have any trauma, anything to cry about or angst over, and nothing is further than the truth. Her struggles were 'ordinary', distant from alien bioweapons or growing up on a space station or being freshly created then locked in a basement forever. But they were still struggles, struggles that shape how she sees the world and not in a good way.

---

She's the most similar to Omega in their shared pathological need for control, lol. They're both control freaks, even if said control freaking can occur in opposite directions from each other. It's where they chafe the most and it's because they're so similar. They're also both prideful and care deeply about keeping their reputations consistent. They're both liars in contrast to Shadow's honesty.

She's the most unlike Omega in that she's willing to mute herself to get what she wants. Sometimes she wishes she could scream "why can't you just pretend to be normal?!?!?!" at him when he's stirring up trouble and forcing her to alter her plans. She's calculated. He's rash. Fundamental mismatch of vibes sometimes.

Conclusion

It's been so fun to type out the culmination of almost my two years writing for these characters and how they weave in and out of each other.

In a not-at-all-concise way, I've tried to describe how they fit together and how they all have different sides to them.

I think the most important thing I've practiced to make them feel "real" when you're writing them is to hint, but not outright state, that there's something they're not saying that differs or is deeper than their surface-level conversation. For example, Rouge would never ever EVER say "I'm manipulating people to protect myself." Omega would never ever ever say "I care but I have no idea how to show it." Shadow could maybe possibly say "I'm trying to find myself and resist being the obedient tool I was made to be," but holy shit is he going to have to be going through it to even consider saying that.

You have to hint at it. Dance around the topic. Delight in withholding the information from the readers. Have Rouge sweet-talk someone to do something only for her smile to fade into something anxious and tired the moment their back is turned. Have Omega shoplift something small for Rouge from the supermarket and have him questioning the entire time whether it was even worth the effort, only to be relieved when Rouge squeals in delight. Have Shadow give an abrupt "no" to a seemingly benign request for a favor from Rouge and write him clamming up about why he did so afterwards.

It's blending these deeper facets of their characters into their current dialogue and actions that's my favorite thing to do in my writing. Even better if an outside character witnesses that little glimpse of the interior world and goes "huh, I wasn't expecting that."

Oh, and all the above paragraphs I've typed in this post to perfectly describe each character? Remember that they don't know all that about themselves.

They might be just as surprised as the outside characters are about how they've acted. They might not realize that something was bothering them, or that there was something they feel strongly about, until it surfaces unexpectedly! This can result in fights, or big dramatic moments.

All of THAT dives into the whole "avoiding therapy-speak" discussion currently happening in the greater writing community, one that would require me to write an entirely different post to explain. Here's my favorite primer on the subject if you'd like, but this post is already long enough, so I'll leave off here.

Thank you so much for this ask. You gave my autistic ass the best evening of my life typing this all out.

[lemotmo]

Genuinely don't understand how these people get these ideas.

Q. Theorizing stuff when we have no idea if he's even still on the show is insane behavior because he's not filming.

A. How do you know he's not filming? You're basing that entirely off of the bts of the calls the show intentionally wanted people to see and be distracted by. Eddie is in El Paso for that episode, duh he wouldn't have been in those BTS videos. You know who else we've barely seen? Jennifer, and none of you are predicting her exit as a result of that. None of you predicted Peter's exit when Bobby retired. Eddie is the only one you do this over. And most of you are following the lead of people who want him to leave, and even they don't genuinely believe he's gone. If he was leaving we would know by now. The show would have allowed that information to have been leaked. Then the cliffhanger would be rather or not his exit would be open ended or if they would kill him off. That's where the speculation would be. Neither the show, or ABC, would allow the show's entire promotional campaign to be built around a duo if one half of that duo was leaving. No one has ever or will ever do that because that's asking your audience to invest in something they can no longer deliver. This show is not stupid. Also Tim basically told you he wasn't leaving. He said the Buck and Eddie story would show both sides of the story. Meaning we will see Buck's side of the story as well as Eddie's side of the story. If Ryan was leaving there would be no Eddie side to tell. The show wouldn't care because he wasn't on the show anymore therefore Buck's did of the story would be the only side that mattered. Be serious for one moment.

Theorizing is part of fandom. You develop theories until you get new information and then you adjust your theories. Guess what? After the TVLine write up, I no longer think my earlier speculation is correct. That's part of the fun. It's part of the point. You all don't see him in clips he should absolutely not be in because his character is in an entirely different city and you immediately conclude Eddie is permanently leaving and he and Buck will call themselves bros for life as he drives off into the oblivion. Your freakouts make absolutely no sense and are invented from absolutely nothing.

Thank you Nonny!

🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

I cannot.

How many times do we have to repeat ourselves? This topic has been discussed over and over again.

NO! Ryan is NOT leaving! Eddie is not leaving!

Let it go already.

Oh... and you know what?

YES! Buddie is happening! 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[anord]

ANORD: A Dissection.

BIG ASS LORE

This is just explaining how Anord as a character works. There will most likely be a sequel to this.

it is long, but it is worth it,,,, PLEASE READ IT I BEG

thank you

and without further ado, I present: I have been thinking about this guy for almost a quarter of my life wowza

For this to make sense you have to realize that there are thousands of people named Anord/Chaos (if you didn’t know- “Anord” translates to “Chaos” in Irish. A lot of character names/funky words I write are just google translated Irish, so if you want some more context, google translate it!!)

Today we are talking about the Anord you all know. 

Confirming this now: HE IS NOT HUMAN, HE IS NOT A GOD. Technically by this Daisy’s House lore requirements he would be considered a false god.

Anord is an entity made out of this green goopy stuff which SHOULD have a name (like how God Blood is called Ichor sometimes- i need a cool name like that!!) but for now it is just called Pure Chaos because that’s what it is! 

It is concentrated chaos. If something unexpected happens, it generates this energy called chaos. Whether that’s spilling milk or assassinating the president, it’s considered chaos.

Anord is MADE ENTIRELY of this stuff. He has no blood. He has no bones. He has no heart. He has his body of chaotic energy that he has collected for a LOOONG time. 

Time is weird in this universe, so please keep that in mind if you’re like “how is that possible??” with any of this stuff. We’ll get into Anord’s association with time soon

PURE CHAOS: its properties are strange. It’s almost the consistency of oobleck. It’s not quite liquid, not quite solid, depending on the concentration. This is why anord’s body is mainly solid!! Pure chaos is constantly shifting and changing, and can be manipulated by some. For now, only Anord has the power to manipulate it, but IF YOU WANT TO MAKE CHAOS OC’S PLEEEASE TALK TO ME ABOUT IT*!! Pure chaos is made by any living and non living being. So if the wind knocks over a flower vase, that is considered chaos. Storms are a great cause of chaos. It is not always man made, but it is most often made by humans. Pure Chaos can technically be harnessed and used by any being!! It is open for anyone to include this into their lore!! PLEASE TALK TO ME ABOUT IT THOUGH bc I don’t want to be the source of mary sues!! It can be powerful, but it does have limits!!

Anord’s main and practically only motive is to cause chaos. Why? Because he’s made out of it!! It makes him feel good! It’s a necessary part of his life! No chaos, no Anord. If he does not absorb enough chaos to sustain himself, his body will start to slowly eat at itself and disintegrate. This is why he is often shown to be malnourished and skinny (this is also due to other mental factors). 

This is why he likes hanging around Rose. He doesn't love her. HELL, he HATES HER!! He only sticks around because she’s easy to manipulate and is a great source of chaotic energy to feed on. 

Do not think of Anord as a human full of sin or a god above man. He is a parasite. He is a powerful parasite. He’s a selfish adrenaline junkie that wants to wreck everything and everyone.

TIME:

Anord and Time have a strained situationship. 

Anord - the body - is a fairly recent form created in the year 2000. Again, it was created out of Pure Chaos and can switch to different forms. More on that later.

Anord - the mind - was born long ago. I cannot talk about this due to spoilers!! 

Like I said before, there are thousands of Anords. One of these is the ACTUAL God of Chaos. They started the Earth. They are the cause of every single chaotic event in the history of the planet. They caused the Big Bang. Chaos created the universe. Before that, it was bleak nothing. Chaos (the god) created humanity indirectly. They created everything indirectly, really. Almost as if they built the track, the marble, and the hand and whispered to the hand to push the marble down the track. ANYWAYS Chaos (the god) likes to basically sponsor humans. Ever since humanity was made, there would be one human that would cause chaos that would catch the god’s eye and they’d basically attach to that human and watch them live, influencing their actions subtly. The Anord (mind) that you talk to every day was one of these humans long ago. He was the last.

The first was Eve. So technically speaking Anord is trans. I said it it's canon.

(Diversity win! The one that will destroy everything and everyone you know and love is genderfluid!)

Every time one of these humans would die, another would be born. This also goes for other gods in my universe.

So technically Anord as a whole has existed since day 1. Actually, a little before that.

Anord (mind) that you know is not that old. He is very young compared to the other souls in that vessel.

You heard me right. Every single person that Anord (the god) has overlooked is inside Anord (the vessel). Anord (the mind you know) is the one who talks the most as he is the one who created Anord (the body). Anord (the mind) had a different name when he was a human but he does not like to be called that. Treat it as a deadname. 

So not only is there Anord (the one you know) but there is Anord (Witch from the salem trials) or Anord (participant in the Boston Tea Party) or Anord (in his world war two era)

Basically if you can think of any time period, there is an Anord alive somewhere either chilling or fucking someone’s wife. 

THE BODY:

So now that we know more about Anord’s mental insides lets learn about his physical insides

Bro has no bones 💀

Pure Chaos is VERY hard to control. He has to have conscious effort to keep his body in human shape. When he’s not doing well, a lot of the times he locks himself in his room because he doesn’t have the effort for all of his cosmetic details (he goes bald :hearts:)

Another thing is that pure chaos HURTS LIKE HELL when you want to change forms. Imagine staying in one place for so long and then you have to rip all of your atoms away from their spot and rearrange them into something new. Yeowch. 

His body can be in 3 states basically.

FORM 1: goop

green

Jello + honey texture (thick and not opaque. Jiggly.)

Tiny (could fit in your hands if you cupped them together)

Adorable (just a little guy)

Nonverbal (Its mouth can only eat)

Really likes milk (it makes him grow)

A small little slime guy. He slides around and bites ankles. He only goes into this form when weak/wounded because he heals faster. This is what his form looks like when he doesn’t force it into human shape. 

FORM 2: egg

Human shape (from the outside it looks absolutely normal)

Literally just skin and outside bits (like eyes and teeth)

Just goop on the inside (no bones, organs, blood, nothing)

Green on the inside

He is in this form most of the time lately. I call this the egg form because he’s just a shell with slime inside. You can tell if he’s in this form if he bleeds/spits/cries green chaos goop. This form occurs when he puts all of his effort into his outside appearance. Why would he need to waste brain usage to form organs and bones and such when nobody’s gonna see that? He can function without those things. 

FORM 3: ooo you wanna be a human sooo baaad

Human shape

Has organs and innards and everthing

No green anywhere (except his eyeballs)

This is the form he’s mainly in when he’s strong enough. Basically an asshole human guy.

[taylorsfolkmoredress]

Here’s my second Derek Morgan request! Reader is also a BAU agent whose hotel room is right next to Derek’s during a case. She’s the newest addition to the team, so she’s still getting used to the intensity of their cases. Derek can tell she’s been struggling a bit lately, but he doesn’t pry until she comes knocking on his door at the ass crack of dawn cuz she can’t sleep and doesn’t wanna be alone.

Oh this is so cute I hope tumblr lets me write this one lmao!

wc: 956

tags: hurt/comfort, could be read as platonic or developing romance. not dialogue heavy but still sweet, also not as long as i wanted but its 7am and i havent slept yet :)

not edited!

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

A soft knock at his hotel door pulled Derek from his dreams of soft hair and gentle words. It took him a second to understand that he had to get up to answer the door, but when he did, he made his way to the door in nothing but a pair of loose sleep pants and a well worn muscle tee that had thinned with time.

When he pulled the door open he was met with your teary face, quivering lips tugging at his heartstrings like nothing else ever had. You looked like the utter definition of the phrase “I need a hug”, and he could do nothing else but pull your soft body into his wrapping his strong arms around you in a tight, but not constricting, hug. He felt you tense for a second, but almost immediately after, you completely relax in his arms, going near boneless as the tension from the day leaves your body.

Derek hadn’t yet had the pleasure of holding you like this, the way friends do, the way people who know each other better than anyone do. He’s glad he’s one of those people, glad he’s already learned so many little tells of yours.

It started on the third day of the case. The unsub had already killed again, and they had had good reason to suspect he’d taken his newest victim already as well. The case had been particularly close to your home town, only an hours drive away, and it was clear it was freaking you out.

It would’ve freaked Derek out as well, he didn��t blame you, but he knew the feeling must be much more intense due to your inexperience in the field. You’d only joined the BAU two months prior, and every case you’d worked since seemed to weigh down your spirit more and more. He hated seeing it. You somehow retained your beautiful smile every day, but this case was too much, and he saw the mask crack from a mile away.

Which lead to now. The case wrapped up mere hours ago, two more victims dead, one injured but looking towards recovery. It wasn’t the result anyone hoped for, but it was the one you would all have to live with.

He made sure to keep his arms secure around you while he pulled you into his room, knowing you didn’t want anyone else seeing this side of you. Your shoulder trembled against his chest and it made his heart ache. He hated seeing you cry, you were so damn sweet, he couldn’t handle your tears.

His own words hit his ears before he even realized he was speaking. “Sweetheart, it’s ok, I’m here, I’ve got you.” His words were soft, murmured against your hair, but still audible. They caused a heaving gasp against his chest, and a whole new wave of tears to fall. He made no move to stop them, knowing that what you needed in that moment was to release those emotions you’d tried to keep locked away all week. It was a feeling he knew all too well.

The couch was soft when he set you down on it, moving to kneel in front of you so he can continue holding you. He presses his cheek to your temple, letting out soft reassurances and gently humming occasionally. He held you like that for a while, but he didn’t watch the time. It wasn’t important to him, all he cared about was knowing you were okay.

You were a brilliant agent, a fresh set of eyes that never failed to offer insight far above your supposed experience level. It made him feel a strange sense of pride when your observations lead to a breakthrough in cases. Beyond that, you were someone he already loved spending time with. The two of you had clicked immediately, much to everyone’s surprise. You were quite shy, timid even, and Derek was the exact opposite. Maybe thats what made you gravitate towards each other so easily. He didn’t know. What he did know was that He’d heard you crying through the thin hotel walls every night for 3 days straight, and he finally had a chance to help without feeling like he was backing you into a corner.

He gently ran his hands up and down your back and arms, doing his best to ground you and help you to calm down. Each sob became slower and slower, before turning into soft hiccups. He feels you tense for a moment as you come back to yourself, but he feels you relax from exhaustion just as quickly. He takes that as his cue to speak, not letting you overthink anything.

“Hey, pretty girl, listen to me. Okay?” He waits for your small nod before continuing. “You did amazing out there this week, and we couldn’t have found this creep without you. You protected the people in the community. I know it’s hard, but each and every one of us on this team has been in your shoes. We’ve all felt that same dread, that same fear. That same abhorrence for opening our eyes in the morning or closing them at night. But you’re meant for this job the way you handle the victims families, and you always treat the victims with such grace and dignity? It’s beautiful. I can’t see you lose that.” His words seemed to settle something inside you. You pulled away from him, but not out of sadness, you pulled away with a look of determination, albeit a tired one.

He knew you weren’t okay yet, but as he lead you to his bed and got you comfortable before moving to the couch himself, he knew that you would be, one day.

[trainingthots]

This cannot be to me Delicacy Love,

I do not think if you as anything of the sort, and if anyone is the Narcissistic Ass it is me. I love every single one of your flaws, especially your tendency to project your insecurity onto others. I do the same things only much worse. I am not using anything against you, i do not fight against you. Its one if the problems in our relationship, that i never could tell you no and that your self loathing meant my love for you made me the least desirable person in the god damn world to you. This man, so easy to degrade and humiliate, to use and despise their girl, got spun around and lost when i met you and fell in love. All of a sudden out of my element i only wanted to love, care and respect you, but had no idea how to do that because of the toxic awful person i was. When i felt like j was never going to get to love you and have you completely, i frustrated and angry at myself for being so ineffectual at the one thing i wanted did what i always do, fuck it all up and pretend that i only failed because it wasnt worth doing. How wrong i was. How wrong i still am if i make you feel this way. But the facts dont line up. I have not been critical of you, i am dealing with pain and loss, but it is helping me realize my awful mistakes and filling me with regret and the urge to do better and right by you. This is once again orobably not for me but for the man you actually love. I am so tired of gim being the one who breaks your heart. I am not the jealous type, but i am amgry that while i am hurt from finding out about all my pain and losing you, i feel so much empathy for you being jn pain from losing him. I am a total pathetic mess. I am sorry for your loss, and i hope to be there for you while you grieve.

You are not unlovable, and the abandonment thing is something i have always accepted and ignored. You have abandoned me so many times its ludicrous. I am not belittling you. I am trying to understand your growth and change while ignoring my own pain. Once again i am not doing the best job, but i am trying.

Nothing I do or post js against you. If someone is doing that it is not me. There is a lot of stuff done in my name that is not me these days. Close your eyes, open your heart and know i would never intentionally hurt you. It is all love from me. I will not criticize you, i will not shame you, i will not even tell people what is going on with me because it risks people thinking poorly on you, and i will not have it.

Forever Your Cheerleader,

The Marquis De Sad

Unlovable

To you,

I'm a narcissist and you know it's true. I've projected all my insecurities just to protect this fragile ego. Now that you've exposed me, I can admit the truth about my low self-esteem and self-worth. I'm temperamental and throw tantrums like a child. I'm narrow-minded and get defensive in arguments. I hide the truth about my life because I genuinely hate myself and all my flaws. It's who I am. 

Thank you for showing me how little respect you have for me. I now understand your intentions of making me feel the pain and dishonesty I have inflicted onto you. There's no need for defending myself at this point if you feel encouraged to make me feel like the most ruthless immature person that has existed. I'm glad you feel a sense of fulfillment in your quest to making me aware of the hateful person I am. 

It's true that I'm unlovable. Everything I attach myself to doesn't truly belong to me. I chose to abandon both myself and others, so please continue writing about how much you despise me. Use everything against my will to prove to me that I was a mistake in your life. I deserve to be agonized and shamed for trying to love you.

You said it yourself that I look like shit, so please let me continue to deteriorate alone. I am unworthy of love and believe I will continue to be just an option. To tell you the truth, you were the first person I felt comfortable being around without a mask. I could be my most authentic autistic self with you, without fear that you'd abandon me for my weirdness. When I felt unsafe, you were always the first person I’d turn to because I gave you the key to my tender heart. I guess it never meant anything anyways.

The narcissist in me is frustrated that I can't control your desire to use my pictures, trauma, and love against me. If you wish to continue belittling me just to prove how terrible a human I am, you've already done an amazing job. And still, I can never hate you because I already hate my life, and you don't deserve that. I'm sorry for being unlovable. 

Me

February the last, 1966 Anne Sexton, from Complete Poems

[tommykinard6]

This is me putting out a desperate plea for someone to write BuckTommy mpreg with Tommy instead.

Please. I’m begging someone to break up the monotony of my dash. I don’t have time to do it all myself.

[violentlydefending]

genuinely always so shocked to see mirei hate. like literally god forbid women do anything.

[katsdynam1ght]

i need you all to understand and remember that mha takes place like 200 years in the future and there are people with literal windex bottles and guns for heads. queerness is probably the last concern of most parents these days. quirks and mutations are a much bigger issue

“kats what do you mean touya’s the reason natsuo’s homophobic” because he and his boyfriend-then-husband keigo can’t keep their hands off each other and natsuo thinks it’s gross. (for any aftg fans out there it’s like aaron with nicky ok)

“aren’t rei and enji more likely to be—” no. i don’t care how traditionally they were raised. enji is obsessed with all might and while it is fine for a man to be obsessed with another man without having feelings for him, there is an inherent layer of homoeroticism there (not necessarily queerness, but definitely homoeroticism) and even subconsciously i think enji can understand there’s something to all of that. he just doesn’t ever process it consciously. i genuinely do not think this man has it in him to be homophobic he has too much else to worry about (and he loves his family. if they’re happy who cares who they’re into)

rei, on the other hand, though she grew up with a certain set of standards, i believe works very hard to break away from all of those biases. again, she loves her family. as long as everyone’s happy, that’s really all she wants to see. she can’t control her children’s lives and she wouldn’t want to—that sort of behavior is what got them into all of this mess to begin with

“okay well why is natsuo—” i told you already also he canonically has a girlfriend (future wife? idk i haven’t read the manga i’ve just seen the panel) and he’s too much like my brother (i.e. the only straight person out of four kids) for me to ignore his blatant heterosexuality. also if you ask me i think he’s far more prone to repeating the abuse cycle than anyone in the family but that’s a topic for another day

“fuyumi?” lesbian. if anything deals with comphet. but i think by default she feels more secure and free around other women. even though she loves her father there are still impacts of bearing witness to his abusive behavior over the years and i think that is imprinted into every interaction she has with men her age and older throughout her life. she deserves a woman/women who will love and cherish her better than a man could

i will take no criticisms about touya as we should all be well aware by now that dabihawks is the only ship i can put him in. anything else and he loses his opportunities to be a better person and i am morally obligated to hate him. also sorry touya but keigo is the only person who can genuinely love you as you are. nobody else would be so attuned to your mood swings and so patient with your tantrums. also he wants to bite you a little bit but you’ll enjoy that

and finally

shouto: poly class A is all i’ll say about him

let the record show i do not care at all what anyone else’s opinions are about these characters. you will not change my mind. as far as i’m concerned everything i say is canon and i have the writing skill to back it up. i will be writing fic with all of this eventually

thank you and goodnight

sorry but i’m convinced natsuo is the only straight person in the todoroki family. he’s only homophobic because of touya though. (he would be more homophobic if he knew about his dad but i don’t think enji even processes his own sexuality so none of them know)

[maryasmorevna]

................. not to rain down on anyone's parade but barely characterized 14 year old lucerys could never have the swag eleanor or henry had

[stresskidz]

Can't stop thinking about royal guard Hyunjin x princess reader AU. They cannot communicate much due to a language barrier, but he protects her with his life.

[sisterdivinium]

It's interesting to stroll around Fanlore reading discussions that took place in 2007 talking about the fractured nature of fandom on LJ and people interacting without having enough context (as in commenting on a post they did not read by a user they do not know) when you're living in 2023 and people distribute likes without reading anything or commenting; when there's supposedly "drama" of unknown origins happening in more than one website at the same time because there's no real "home base" for fandom activity anymore; and we're all carrying on with our lives reblogging things without even looking at previous notes and reactions to that same post even if out of simple curiosity...

[sunflowermp4]

ep 6! i love when it's so obvious when not a single person involved in the production of a show has ever been in or near a punk/house show. LOL. mark running a harmony cobel on petey's grieving teenage daughter is crazy as hell. GET A JOB. LEAVE HER ALONE.

more under the cut bc this got long

alexa STAND UP!!! i hate how they use her as exposition tool and generator prompt for mark scout backstory. name one single thing we know about her or her personality besides what she does for work. she's never not smiling never not understanding never not gracious never not forgiving never expresses or is even implied to have her own needs or desires. there's a metatextual commentary to be made here. someone pull up the fucking cool girl monologue!!! that is not a real person that is a plot device disposable girlfriend and i am furious on her behalf. the cracks are showingggggg. why does helly r have like two lines in the whole episode. i do not believe that is a recent (on the order of HOURS) survivor of a suicide attempt. ru kidding me.

the gut punch line of this episode is helly seeing the O&D department of seven people and saying that's the most people she's ever seen in her life. i do NOT believe that with the characterization we've seen so far that mark would be the one giving that speech to O&D while helly stands and politely smiles in the corner. i would believe it maybe a little more if, again, we saw any sign that this is a person who recently fucking made an attempt on their own life.

that whole date scene could have been cut and replaced with the dylan/milchick subplot. i need a show that is interested in how milchick (implied raised & groomed in a cult) feels about dylan (loves his kids more than anything in the world). i need a show that is interested in how milchick and dylan g and outie dylan relate to their own Black identity. i do not need the hamfisted writing of alexa being mark's backstory prompting therapist while on the second worst date in human history and then kissing him when he's done giving exposition and then laying silently in his bed. BORING.

i do need more of cobel & graner's insane passive aggressiveness. "so what are you a nurse or something?" devon's little aside of "so what the fuck was that" to herself after the playground scene is the kind of interiority work i need given to gemma and alexa. it's glaring at this point. gemma walking out of the break room with bags under her eyes makes me see red. GET HER OUT OF THERE!

PATRICIA ARQUETTE EMMY FUCKING NOW! i've never seen anyone as good at making an absolute five course gourmet feast out of every single line of dialogue. (honorable mention to christopher walken). the plant scene still makes me fucking tear up and it always will probably!!!!!!!!! #BURVINGHIVE #LOVEWINS #HOLDHANDSWITHTHATOLDMAN

REGHABIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

fomo won. going to try to catch up on two seasons of severance in one week

[chastiefoul]

he finds you crying ft. love and deepspace men

ft. zayne, xavier, rafayel, and sylus a/n: I always feel like mc wasn’t given enough time to grief when chapter 4 happened (or maybe they just didn’t show it or i remember it wrong) but to lose the people you’ve considered family like that in front of your eyes would severely mess on anyone’s mental well-being. mc stronger than me fr i would've had a breakdown every night. so i tried to write the comfort that was long overdue. <3

Zayne

He found you hunched over at the couch, knees tucked to your chest. your shoulder shook as he heard the sniffles and although he’s physically perfectly fine, he swore it felt like his heart was breaking in two.

He would gently put his key on the table, making his presence known in the subtlest way possible so you didn’t get startled.

You quickly tried to wipe your eyes and sat normally but suddenly in no time you were carried as he made you sit on his lap, bringing your head close to his neck as he held you tight.

Zayne wasn’t one who’s great at offering consoling words, as he also a firm believer of actions speak louder than words. As he rubbed your back gently he only said, “Let it all out, I’m here.”

So you did just that. You’ve said this once to him as a joke, but truly, anywhere by his side was the time you felt the most safe.

The doctor continued to comfort you in silence, hoping with every beat of his heart that his arms and hands that’s so used in saving people’s lives, could offer at least some kind of solace for your heart that was in disarray.

Xavier

He’d never hated the sight of a bed so much, until he found you crying atop of it.

Xavier would rushes over to you (arguably faster when he encountered strayed wanderers), determined to do anything he could to help you feel better.

As he put a hand over your cheek, wiping the tears that just kept on coming he whispered, “I’m here, what do you need?”

When you couldn’t even manage a reply Xavier would just stay by your side, his and was diligent in rubbing the side of your face; he never felt so useless, knowing the little gesture gave almost to none help.

For someone who finds sleep easy inbetween every hours, that was the most restless he’s ever been. He stayed with you until you calmed down, offering gentle whispers as you felt your awake state slipping away.

The moment you’re asleep Xavier was keen on wiping your face softly off of the remaining tears, and he tucked you in properly. He brought you to his embrace.

Yet unlike any other nights, he couldn’t find any part of him that was able to join you into the dream state.

Rafayel

Rafayel knew he came at a bad time. Seeing the way you spoke so stiffly and the way you zoned out of the conversation every few minutes.

However, he also knew he couldn’t leave you alone right then.

The silence once again was loud, but he didn’t think you realize that, as he followed your stare to the table, to what’s on the top of the table to be exact. A necklace with an apple charm on it.

He approached your side, cupping your face with both of his hands. “Miss bodyguard, you don’t have to be strong all the time, you know? Especially now, since you’re off duty.”

You chuckled quietly, but what followed after was not your usual easy smile but instead it was tears streaming down your face. And it felt like Rafayel could offer anything he had just to make them stop. And if that’s not enough, he swore to give you twice or thrice of what he had, it didn’t matter if he was to be in debt.

He held you tight, the sight of you crying was enough to make tears made their way to his eyes as well. And it pained him, knowing the best he could do in that moment was only to hold you tighter, as he wished that he could mend whatever broken part you had with one of his.

Sylus

He didn’t even flinch when you climbed on his lap, your usual talkativeness was nowhere to be found.

You rested your head on his shoulder and within seconds he knew that your emotions were in chaos, and if you thought you could find comfort in him, then he was more than happy to be there for you.

“Let me stay like here for a while,” you said weakly, voice all tense and anxious.

He brought a palm to your back, “By all means, darling. You didn’t think I was going to turn you away, did you?”

You stayed quiet, trying your best to get your emotions in order but it just seemed impossible. Sylus then sigh at your another attempt to pretend once again that you’re okay. “Cry if you need. Tears were never a sign of weakness, it just proves that you’re human.”

His rigid sentence somehow brought a strange sense of comfort for you, making your tears escape freely.

Sylus’ fingers felt fleeting on your back, like a touch that could slip away anytime. But he made sure none of that will happen as he stroke your hair gently over and over.

Was he worried of you? Absolutely. Yet he believed with all of his entire being that you that has fallen apart that day, would have no time standing back up again on the next day.

If there’s anything he learnt about you during your time with him, is that you’re a stranger to giving up.

[acid-ixx]

You mention in the first story that the Batfam finally realizes where we are because jon showed Damian our picture while calling us his parent- so I was wondering about how Damian reacted to that? Like did he realize we’d left at that point or did he just get hit in the face with that info?

— related post !

reblogs and interactions are encouraged and appreciated

a/n: y'all i have clogged nose and i hate it LMAO. anyways, i'm gonna write smth about this soon but damian's character for both the series again & again and this series is genuinely one of the more complicated to write because of how he's raised but it really goes like this—

"jon... what do you mean? that's my—"

he cuts himself off before he could continue running his mouth off. damian ignores the slight raise of jon's eyebrow, his thoughts running a mile every second.

his parent? no, never once in his life has damian considered you his parent, pushing you away whenever you try to bond with him. whatever gifts you gave him, no matter how small, or big, expensive, or inexpensive they are, he always makes a show of ripping them away right in front of you.

he told you himself. you are not his parent, never will be his parent, you'll never replace talia's standing, and there will never be a time where damian will see you as one. dick, jason, tim, literally anyone can consider you as theirs, but damian is a product of two genetically perfect individuals— you are imperfect, and it's not your business to coddle him just because you are merely married to his father in paper.

no matter how much you softly gaze at him with loving eyes, invite him with welcoming arms, praise his passion for drawing; all you'll do is weaken him and damian hates feeling weak, hates how you tempt him into melting into a puddle. that automatically makes you a burden in his book.

he hates you, and he should've been glad you disappeared off of the face of the manor.

yet the record stands still: why are you with jon? why do you hold him like he is the world in the picture? what does he mean by "sorry, damian, but me and my parents are gonna go to the carnival later!"? you, as in, bruce's spouse? why are you with them, of all people?

... why does jon get to have fun, with you? and he doesn't...?

and yet he couldn't reply to him, not when his friend babbles on for longer about his... parent. about how you, make him feel so complete. that you'll be the one helping him with his science fare project, how you two spent the night yesterday building a volcano, how you treat him with ice cream every time he achieves a good enough grade for a subject, how you, you, you always spoil jon, always comfort him, read him bedtime stories, matched bracelets, sung karaoke together, played board games with each other, picked him up from school, help him with assignments—

the more jon goes on, the more damian wants to rip his hair out. he doesn't know, doesn't know why he's suddenly pissed. is it because jon can never shut up, or because he couldn't shut up about you? about how perfect you are apparently? how you're the ideal parent he never once bat an eye on? the domestic life jon seems to brag about, it's something damian secretly wanted, and it's all ripped away from him.

it makes damian wonder, would you have done the same for him?

he knows it in himself, that if he hadn't pushed you away, he might've been in jon's place.

[kamisamabest]

first question: do you have any proof that Crowley and ferid are based on the chars you mentioned? by proof i mean the author/artist stating their inspirations. i think not. and as i said,just because you got inspired from one thing doesn't mean that the thing you create is that thing. Crowley didn't care about his brain being fried,because ferid always kept things from him,manipulated him from start to end, didn't care to tell him about any of his plans and Crowley was tired of it as he stated before. they never had any romantic/sexual interactions except for ferid sucking Crowley's blood.

the vampire relations in owasera is:

vamp finds human,turns human into vamp->parental

human that was turned into a vamp discovers another vamp turned by the same vamp->siblings

this was how Crowley and ferids relation was. what you mean is

vamp finds human,likes the human a lot,goes "hmm y'know what you're gonna suffer w me for all eternity and we'll be bffs",turns human into vamp.

vampires can't have romantic relationships with other vamps/humans because they don't have feelings,their only feelings are the strongest feelings from their human times. for example,mika was in love with yuu before he was turned,so he kept his feelings for yuu.

second, creating fandom content is perfectly fine. you said it yourself that you meant "fanfictions,fanarts,headcanons" etc. and (shocking) i do that too. what is a problem and is annoying is someone mischaracterizing a character while creating that content. for example: writing a canonically gay character with a partner of the opposite gender is ignoring the canon. someone saying that x character is in love with y character while the character shows clear anger and hatred towards that character is mischaracterizing. this,is the problem and what im angry at because it disrespects the creator of the characters.

third- what are you even trying to get at in the last paragraph? im literally a queer person,who is aroace,androromantic/sexual and libramasc? i never said anything about "characters are straight unless explicitly stated else",and that is an argument that i hate with a burning passion. where did you get that from????

if the answer to that is "you said ferid wants to sleep w women again" i said that to show that again,crowferi makes zero sense. oh and also it definitely was not a queer guy wanting to be straight,ferid said himself he doesn't feel any attraction to anyone but he wants to feel attracted to women and sleep with them again. key words are no attraction and again.

if you can't understand it, I'll js break it down for you in order to not insult you again. he says he wants to be attracted to women again,which means that in his human years,he liked women a lot and loved sleeping with them. but now he has a lack of any attraction towards anyone. if you ignore "again" (which you did..),it can be interpreted that way. but he explicitly states that.

also,he doesn't flirt with Crowley. he teases him to provoke him and get a reaction out of him,which he does to basically everyone. he says that he gets suicidal whenever he's alone and not talking to anyone and the author says that he does stuff that people will misunderstand,he does it on purpose so he can "have fun" in his immortal life because as I stated,he says that if he doesn't he gets suicidal and wants to kill himself.

your arguments are based off of misinterpretation of canon statements. you take canon,twist it and say that it's in x context when it isn't,like you did in the last paragraph.

i can assure you that you do not have more experience with queer media than i do. i went through your blog a little bit and didn't find anything about you mentioning anything about you being queer yourself,(im merely assuming you're straight here feel free to correct me if im wrong) but tell me,how does someone have more experience with queer media than a literal queer person(kami) who knew he was queer from childhood,been to many queer spaces and has tons of queer friends whom he communicates often with?

oh and you're contradicting yourself. you say you never said you thought their relationship was romantic but then you showed ferid '''flirting''' (lmfao) with Crowley as '''proof'''.

i could write tons of more counterarguments here.

kami's rage