#again i am sorry for taking this long and not even giving you real kitten time

[lost-in-fandoms]

For kitten knight AU, might be hitting to close to home, sorry :(

What about a time when Daniel gets too injured/gets overlooked to join a mission and is miserable and needing his kitten Max's comfort upon his return?

I am so so sorry this has taken me so long and there is actually zero kitten time in this, but I hope you'll forgive me. There's another ask in my inbox that might get the kitten time related to this (when I'll get to it. again, i'm sorry, it's been a lot lately)

The knife had come out from nowhere.

One moment Daniel was walking the rounds in the lower city with Alex, chatting about nothing, probably paying not enough attention to his surroundings, and the next three thugs had jumped out of the shadows brandishing clubs.

It should have been an easy fight, clubs against swords, but they were in a narrow street, which made maneuvering around each other harder, and both Daniel and Alex had been surprised, reacting just a little too late. Daniel had stopped the first swing of a club with the hilt of his sword, not an ideal move, before being able to go on the attack. He had heard Alex swear behind him, but he'd been unable to check.

And then, just as he had kicked the club out of the hand of his thug and forced him to the ground with the threat of his blade, he had felt a sharp pain on his side, a burst of white hot flames lapping at his nerves, and he had fallen to his knees with a cry.

He isn't sure what had happened after that, his brain confused by adrenaline and pain, but he remembers someone running away, Alex swearing more, the sharp whistle of a call for help, the blurry travel back to the castle.

He had been lucky, the doctor who had stitched him up had said. Lucky, that the guy hadn't taken the blade out after stabbing him, keeping the blood loss to a minimum. Lucky, that it hadn't really hit anything important. Lucky, that the wound hadn't got infected.

And yet, Daniel doesn't feel very lucky, laying in bed, side throbbing, watching Max walk out the door. He feels stupid, for letting himself get stabbed, and already lonely.

The thing is, he was supposed to be heading away with Max too. He had been picked for the mission some time ago, for his ability to keep Max calm and to charm people, but now he has to look while George goes with Max and the rest of the group.

Daniel doesn't have anything again George, he likes George, really, but right now he sort of wishes that George was laying in a bed with a stab wound instead.

He doesn't particularly care about the mission. A noble somewhere near the southern border is rumored to be planning a coup, and Max is heading there to talk and, more importantly, to scare the man to death.

Daniel doesn't give a shit about the mission. He understands the importance of it, a coup would be bad for the kingdom in general and for him in particular, would mean battles and death, but he can admit to himself and the mission could be going to count all the cows in the kingdom and he'd care exactly the same amount.

But he wanted to go. With Max.

He's been thinking about it lately, and he knows he won't be able to be a King's guard forever. There are people in the guard who are happy to grow old like this, who consider the barracks their home, the guards their family, the protection of the King their life purpose. But not Daniel.

He's tired.

He has grown disillusioned in the King's justice, knows that while he's not a bad King, he's not a good one either, and he has grown tired of the night shifts, of the stiff beds, of the endless rounds.

He keeps dreaming about a different life. A small house with a garden, maybe a goat. A soft bed. Waking up with the sunrise, going to bed with the sunset, only seeing midnight if he wants to see it. Maybe living off of something he can do that isn't just swinging a blade.

The problem is. The problem is that none of that, not the house, the bed, the goat, would matter without Max. He wants his life with Max.

And he's not sure that, if presented with the choice between Daniel and the guards, Max would choose him.

So this mission would have been maybe one of his last chances to do something with Max. To be out in the world with him, to spend time together, to maybe find the courage to ask him what he would do if Daniel was to quit, if he would stay, if he would follow.

But he got himself stabbed, and now he's laying in a bed, alone and miserable, missing Max more than the situation would probably call for.

The days are slow.

For the first few he's not allowed to get up, and even if his friends come to see him, and the doctor visits him, he spends long hours staring at the wall, ignoring the books someone had brought him, the letters he could be writing, and thinking about Max and his dream goat instead.

His chest aches with how much he misses him, how much he wants.

Max doesn't write.

Daniel wasn't expecting him to, even if he's sure he sent pigeons for the King, wasn't expecting him to ask about Daniel in the official documents, but he's disappointed anyway, heart aching just a little bit more.

As soon as he's allowed to get up, he goes outside.

He knows he's not technically allowed to exert himself, but he needs to move, he needs to breathe, he needs to empty his brain of all these thoughts and just exist for a while. He climbs to the top of the inner walls, regrets it about five times on the way up and seven on the way down. He goes for a walk out towards the hill, having to sit down an embarrassing amount of times on the way there. He goes to the armory, annoys GP into giving him something to do, then to the stables, until even the horses are unsettled by his nervous energy.

Sleeping at night is hard. He misses Max's solid weight on his side, misses his soft warmth on top of his chest even more. He lays awake for hours, unable to turn around as he'd like because his side still fucking hurts, straining his ears to listen for a purr that doesn't exist.

He waits and waits and waits.

The day Max is supposed to come back, he doesn't.

He sends a pigeon ahead, telling the King they are safe, but a flood had forced them to not use the ford the were planning to and directing them to a bridge further away, delaying their travel of a day. GP is the one who tells Daniel, coming back to the armory where Daniel had been cleaning already shining blades, and Daniel gets out and up to the east tower, cursing every single step all the way up.

He sits there until the sun sets and he grows too cold, gritting his teeth as he climbs the stairs back down and avoiding the mess hall, not feeling like talking to anyone.

That night he curls up tight around a small warm body that isn't there, ignoring the pull of the stitches.

The day after he wakes up to the feeling of the blankets being moved.

He snaps his eyes open, cursing himself for letting someone get this close without noticing, already fumbling for the knife he keeps tied to one of the bed legs, when a hand closes around his and he finally registers the voice speaking to him.

"Daniel, Daniel, it's me, it's fine, it's me."

And then finally, finally, he realises it's Max.

For a moment, he feels like his brain freezes.

Max is there, he can see he's there, but it makes no sense. Max is supposed to still be half a day away, and even if he has arrived already, he's supposed to be debriefing with the King. He's not supposed to be here, wearing barely any clothes, slipping into Daniel's bed.

"Max? What?" is all he manages to say, his voice rough.

Max pushes him slightly, still trying to get into bed, but Daniel doesn't move, too surprised and confused to comply.

"I decided to travel all night. The guys weren't happy, but we got here early" Max explains, fidgeting with the corner of the blanket.

"The King?" Daniel asks, still hesitating

"I wrote the report while traveling and left it for him. I'll talk to him later." Max shrugs, then looks up at Daniel, his cheeks red. "I missed you."

And then finally Daniel's brain catches up with the fact that Max is really here, and he realises there are so many better things he could be doing instead of asking Max questions.

Max lets out a surprised squeak when Daniel lunges at him, wrapping his arms around and squeezing him into a hug, burying his face into the familiar slope of his shoulder and breathing him in.

"I missed you too. I missed you so much, Maxy, I missed you," Daniel babbles, feeling Max's arm wrap around his back much more carefully, his hands moving up and down in a soothing motion.

"It was only ten days," Max says, even as he holds Daniel just as tightly.

It feels much more than ten days when they finally kiss. It feels like a month, like way too long. It feels like filling the hole in Daniel's chest, like fixing his lungs, like slowing his brain. It feels like he was the one who was gone too, and is just now coming home.

"I missed you," he says again when they separate, following Max back down on the pillow, letting him rearrange the blankets around them both.

"I missed you too," Max murmurs back, rubbing his nose against Daniel's cheek. "I almost killed George. More than once."

It startles a laugh out of Daniel, which makes Max laughs too, the sounds merging in the little space left between them.

Daniel isn't planning on saying it, but as soon as he stops laughing, he opens his mouth and blurts:

"I missed my kitten too."

He feels Max go rigid, looking at him with wide eyes, his ears red.

And then he softens, a small smile, much shyer than usual, making its way onto his lips.

"Yeah?" he asks, uncertain, as if Daniel would ever lie about it.

Daniel shuffles even closer, tucking Max under his chin, dropping a kiss onto his hair.

"Yeah," he murmurs. "I kept imagining you were here, that I could hear you purr."

Max's hands flex on his back, muscles tensing briefly like they always do when Daniel mentions out loud one of his cat behaviors, before letting go.

"We don't have time now, I don't know when they'll call for me, but..." Max hesitates for a second, fingers twisting into Daniel's sleep shirt, "I missed that too. I..if you would like, later?"

Daniel smiles, kissing Max's hair again.

"I would love to."

They don't fall asleep, but they hold each other close, listening to the quiet for a while. Daniel will ask about Max's journey later, about George and about the mission, and even later he'll get to cuddle with a soft little kitten, but for now he just wants to feel Max's body in his arms.

He thinks about the house, the bed, the goat, and a kitten. Thinks that maybe, when he'll ask, Max will choose him.

[ribbonsaikeaux]

I Love Mew!

"Thank you so much for stopping by!" Alexis said, giving her friend the tightest of hugs.

"Of course! Its been so long." Beth responded, beaming as she hugged back.

"It has. Ive missed you terribly! Just hasnt been the same without you here." Alexis replied, struggling to not let on just how sad the thought made her.

Their embrace ends and Beth follows Alexis into her appartment. It is rather small, having only one bedroom and a combination livingroom/ kitchen. The furniture all from Ikea, simple and functional.

The two friends made their way to the nearby dining table, Beth taking a seat while Alexis remained standing.

"Ill make us some tea." Alexis said with a smile.

"Oh, you dont need to do that"

"I insist! Wont take any time and we can catch up while the kettle's on."

"I suppose thats fine" Beth responded.

"Great! Ill get right on it!"

Alexis opened a cabinet, searching for a moment before pulling out her kettle.

"So how long are you in town for? She calls back to her friend.

"Only a few days, unfortunately. Work only approved four days of vacation time. Kinda sad cause I only really get two days to visit, the other two are travel days."

Alexis paused a moment, frowning.

"Oh... thats not much time. Id been hoping we'd have more." She said with a smile.

"I knooow. Just the way things go I suppose." Beth says turning back to look at Alexis. "I am so glad to be able to see you though!"

Alexis sets puts the water to boil, turning to lean against the counter and giggling. "Same! Oh! I got something for you! Let me go grab it real quick." She says before excitedly brushing to her room then back out holding a purple and pink plush cat.

"Isnt it so cute?!" She exclaims excitedly.

Beth eyes lit up with excitement. "It is!" She responds as she takes it and hugs it close.

"It even has a pullstring!" Alexis exclaims, giving it a pull.

"I love mew!" The cat says in an almost sickeningly sarccharine voice.

"Ooo! I love it!" Beth says happily, giving the string another pull.

"Youre purrrrfect!"

Beth giggles, pulling the string once more.

"Doll is doll!"

For some reason, that one gave Beth pause. She set the stuffie on the table in front of her, pulling again.

"Doll is doll!"

"Doll is... doll?" She says, her mind starting to feel a little fuzzy.

Alexis grinned. "Thats right sweetie. Doll is doll." Her grin widened as she pulled the string again.

"Doll is doll!"

"Doll is doll..." Beths eyes start to glaze over, staring through the plush kitten.

Alexis pulls the chord in response.

"Doll is doll!"

"Doll is doll..." Beths head feels like its been stuffed with cotton.

"Doll is doll!"

"Doll is doll." She doesnt realize it, but she starts to shrink.

"Doll is doll!"

"Doll is doll." Her ears shift, moving to the top of her head, becoming soft and pink like the cats.

"Doll is doll!"

"Doll is doll." Alexis grins and giggles, picking her up and setting her on the table in front of the plushie. Her head shifting, matching the dolls, complete with silly smile.

"Doll is doll!"

"Doll is doll!" Her voice has shifted, matching the pitch and overt sweetness. Her torso and arms becoming fluffy and filled with cotton. Her transformation to kitty plush nearly complete.

"Doll is doll!"

"Doll is doll!" Her legs and feet follow suit with the rest of her body. Beth is now a perfect copy of the stuffed cat.

Alexis titters, clapping happily and picking the Beth cat up.

"Im sorry sweetie, but I just couldnt stand to let you leave me again. Ive missed you terribly" she pouts, hugging Beth cat tight then giving its string a tug.

"I love mew!"

She smiles, kissing the top of its head. "I love you too!"

The kettle starts squealing. Alexis jumps in surprise, having forgotten she'd put it on.

"Our tea! Oh! We can have a tea party now Bethy Cat!"

She takes the kettle of the fire, humming happily with her friend in her arm.

[legolasghosty]

Find The Word Tag Game!

I got tagged twice in this, and I fully intend to do all the words, so buckle up! We're in for a long one....

From @innytoes, hug, warm, red, and dog.

From @caswellseyes, shine, sun, hug, and exist.

HUG -

Because Willie did want Alex. They wanted his snarky jokes and warm hugs, his incredible drumming and soft kisses, his nervous pacing and gentle caresses. But was that love? Because if he didn’t truly love Alex, he should let the drummer find someone who would. Alex deserved every good thing the world had to offer, and there was no way Willie could give him even half of that. Not if they couldn’t even tell if they truly loved him. He couldn’t just keep Alex to himself if he didn’t even know if they wanted all of Alex or just the parts that made Willie feel nice and fluttery inside.

(From the post-canon fic where Willie is not having a good time.)

WARM -

“Alex?”

Willie’s voice cuts through Alex’s thoughts. He looks down to find his boyfriend staring up at him, looking confused and a bit concerned. 

“You okay?” Willie asks. “You’ve been standing there for like a full minute.”

Alex feels his cheeks warm and he quickly sits down on the rug. “Yeah, I’m fine, sorry,” he answers, hoping it sounds convincing.

Willie doesn’t buy it. Of course they don’t. He’s incredible and can read Alex like a sudoku puzzle. Mixed around and taking some time to puzzle out, but logical and clear. 

Alex isn’t sure he’ll ever have the words to describe Willie or how he feels about them. He just knows that it’s deep and real, and that he sinks a little deeper into it every time Willie laughs. Or smiles. Or does just about anything.

(From the t4t Willex AU where Good Dad Caleb scared the heck out of Alex.)

RED -

“You’re Bobby, right? I really did not want to start this year off by bowling you over with Chewie.”

Wait, if he knows Bobby’s name, then… “Reggie?” he guesses.

“Yeah, hi,” Reggie responds sheepishly. His cheeks are turning red, making his freckles stand out. Not that Bobby is paying attention. “Sorry again, I assumed I would beat you here so I didn’t look before I tossed him in here.”

“It’s fine,” Bobby repeats, though he finds he actually means it this time. Reggie seems nice. At least he apologized for almost killing Bobby with a life-sized stuffed animal. “I was a mess getting my stuff up here too.” Then he glances around at the scattered boxes and gives a wry chuckle. “I guess I still am a mess.”

(From the Boggie Roommates AU that I really need to finish...)

DOG -

“Marina, come on in,” Ray greeted her, stepping back to let her into the living room.

“Thank you so much for taking them,” Marina said as moved slowly into the living room. “You know I’d take them myself, but I just got a new dog and there’s no way he would leave them alone.”

She glanced around the room, taking in the safety precautions and the lack of anything breakable. “So they’re going to be in here then?” she clarified. “I thought you usually had them out in a garage or something.”

“The studio is a bit of a mess at the moment,” Ray explained quickly. “We couldn’t get it cleaned up fast enough, and there’s plenty of space in the house.”

(From the one where the Molinas are Kitten Foster Parents.)

Whew, y'all sick of me yet? Too bad! <3

SHINE -

He stuck the last book into a box, taped it closed, and set it beside the others. Willie cheered and downed the last of their lemonade. Alex glanced out the open door, then leaned in to press a quick peck to their lips, tasting lemons and vanilla chapstick.

“I hope you know you owe me some real kisses when we get home,” Willie teased, poking him in the shoulder when he pulled back. “I’m doing a lot of work here, I deserve a reward.”

“Awww, am I not enough of a reward for you, Sunshine?” Alex snarked.

“Nah, I’m entitled to extra compensation for my efforts,” Willie said, smirking.

“That can be arranged,” Alex chuckled, tucking a stray hair behind their ear. “We gotta get these boxes out to the car first though.”

(From the one where Alex has to go back to his parent's place to get some stuff, but Willie is the best.)

SUN -

Alex takes a deep breath, in through the nose and out through the mouth like Willie taught him. It helps a bit. The thought of Willie and his friends does too. He’s going to get back to them. He isn’t sure how yet, but he will. He has to. Now that he’s had a taste of the sun, of real work and friends and love, he doesn’t think he can live without it anymore.

How is he supposed to go on reading the same books and playing his drums and drawing the same view out the windows now that he knows the rush of adrenaline that comes from beating Bobby at chess? How can he rest easy on his own now that he knows how much fun it is to read stories to Carlos before bed? What is he supposed to do with his hands now that they have been taught how to weave Flynn’s long, dark hair into rows of braids?

What’s the point in singing alone now that he’s heard the way his tone mixes with Julie’s and Luke’s and Reggie’s and Bobby’s to the sound of the piano in the Molina’s sitting room? Why bother trying to make his hair presentable when Reggie isn’t there to mess it up? Who needs wisecracks when there’s no one to laugh at them?

(From the AU where Alex is a prince who finally made some friends)

(Skipping HUG since this is already really long and I already did it.)

EXIST -

A couple of hours in, Alex’s mom came to the door. “Hey, you boys need some snacks or lemonade?” she offered, smiling.

Alex glanced up from where he was seated on the floor, fitting books into a cardboard box. He could see the cold shield behind her eyes. The one he’d known from the time he was six years old. The one that meant, “It doesn’t exist if I ignore it and don’t you dare question that.” Alex felt like the little rainbow bracelet that had lived on his wrist since high school was burning into his skin under the icy burn of her gaze.

“Some lemonade actually sounds great, Mrs. Mercer,” Willie responded, giving her a smile she didn’t deserve.

“Of course, coming right up,” she answered brightly. “I’m so glad Alex has a friend like you to help him out with these sorts of things.”

(Also from the one where Alex has to go home and Willie is amazing, this time with a dash of his awful mom!)

Whew, there we are! I really need to actually finish some of these fics..

If you made it this far and want to do it, consider yourself challenged! I have no clue who has and hasn't been tagged at this point.

Your words are: drop, kiss, once, and smirk!

[beautifulplaceofyouth]

JJK FF/Royal guard

CHAPTER EIGHT | SERIES

Chapter. 1

Chapter. 2

Chapter. 3

Chapter. 4

Chapter. 5

Chapter. 6

Chapter. 7

Chapter. 8

When you keep bumping into your personal royal guard by accident not knowing he is your guardian angel

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook!fallen angel!royal guard! × fem!reader!virgin!princess

Word count: 6.5k

Rating: +18 / hardcore smut with a little of fluff

Genre + warnings: Fluff, smut, dirty talk, princess loses her virginity, first!time, a lot of pussy fingering, biting, nipple play, Jungkook groans a lot, full nakedness, big dick!jk, a little bit of rough pinning and French, neck kissing, missionary, doggy, hard orgasms, bathtub sex, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, guys :D) - she probably pregnant by the time he is done with her - upss - paranormal romance, historical fanfiction, Kook being cold and mysterious, being his sexy self. Caring and possessive!jk! Really horny towards his princess, being a big seductive tease. A lot of swearing, cursing and a little bit of crying.The story isn’t real, just my imagination running wild so just enjoy reading!

a/n: Sorry for being absent so long. I’ve been on my vocation these past weeks, just enjoying myself with family and friends so I haven’t been able to post anything recently and I have a big change in my career that I haven’t even been on tumblr at all so please excuse me for that, I am finally back and will try to post next chapters sooner than I can! Really love you guys for taking the time for these series and appreciate your love and patience to keep waiting for more! If there is some grammar mistakes, please ignore them, English is not my native language! Hope you all have a great day!!! ^_^

“Oh God, what are you even saying!” You blush, your body going scarlet in seconds when you realize his meaning. Covering your red cheeks from his eyes, Jungkook can’t help but laugh when he sees you like this.

She is so adorable.

“What? You don’t agree? I thought you will want to please me,” he whispers to her.

When you look back at him, he knows he has won by the look on your face. You were already a soft person, but with Jungkook, that was something else completely.

He didn’t really think much about what he was doing when he decided to confess. He just knew he couldn' wait anymore. He wanted to claim you fully. With no one distracting him.

Just you.

Your fingers intertwine in his own before you both lean forward and close the gap between each other. His hands reach for the hem of your dirty shirt, sliding it up slowly as his lips gently glide across yours.

She’s finally mine, he thinks. You feel so good against him. And he wants more. But not here. Not right now.

Instead, he pulls away, taking in your flushed face and swollen lips with a grin. He leans down and kisses you again before releasing you from his grip, causing you to stumble back slightly.

“You know what,” he whispers as he takes your hand in his. “ We should go to bed. It’s late already.”

“But Moe, we need to wait for him to bring me a shirt first. He will be more upset when he comes back and sees that we are not here anymore.”

Jungook rolls his eyes,” I can give you one of mine so it doesn’t matter anymore.”

You shake your head at him, not believing how rude he is to his servants. Seeing him act like this since he has always been silent around you, it was strange to be honest.

“And what about food? We didn’t even eat anything,” you stare sadly at the prepared dishes on the table.

The look you have made Jungkook imagine a sad kitten with ears down when you continued to stare at the food.

Why is she so fucking cute?

“I will ask my servants to take the food to our chambers instead,” he shrugs at you, his lips tugging up into another grin. He knows he got the best out of you just because you weren't looking. Now that he had you, everything felt perfect.

After a few moments of staring at each other, you start giggling.

“What’s so funny?” Jungkook asks, a smirk spreading onto his features as you cover your mouth.

“Nothing, it’s just... I have never seen you like this before. Is there anything you do differently? Are you more affectionate? More gentle?”

Jungkook chuckles at this. As far as he can remember, he hasn’t ever done anything different than what he has done this moment.

“I guess you could say that,” he answers honestly.

“So…how we are going to sleep? You said your chambers…as in we together in the same room?” You can’t pronounce your words correctly when you’re nervous so you didn’t know what to do but look down when you asked him this.

“It would be a pleasure if we slept together in my bed tonight, yes.”

His smile widens as your cheeks turn bright red. You nod in reply and when you’re about to turn around so you can follow him, behind someone calls you.

“My lady! My lady! Here will be the shirt you requested! I’m sorry for the delay. The maids refused me to give me clothes for her highness, everyone thought that I’m lying when I said them his Majesty’s wife needs a shirt,” Moe comes running into the dining room looking absolutely guilty for being late when you both stop to look at him.

The poor creature looks so embarrassed, it almost makes you giggle but you stop yourself from doing so.

“Moe, it’s fine. Thank you for coming! I appreciate it, and you should also take this food to his Majesty. We will got to our chambers now and eat there, all right?” You smile at the octopus warmly.

Moe bows to you,” Right away, my lady! I will prepare a tray then.” Giving you a shirt, you appreciate his consideration and take it from him.

You thank the servant once more before you turn to Jungkook. Before you leave, you call over your shoulder,” Make sure to get me fresh flowers for the morning, please! Also, make some fruit tea and a hot pot of water!”

As soon as you see the servant bow, Jungkook takes you by the hand and leads you into the big hallway.

From the moment you stepped outside of his chambers, it still surprised you how beautiful this castle is. Everything is in silver color, from the carpets to the walls to the doors, windows, and paintings that decorate the place. There were even shelves made of glass which displayed numerous books, weapons and jewelry like ; diamonds, gold, colored brilliants.

The castle looked like a real fairy tale.

You wonder what Jungkook sees when he walks these halls; does he see all these things too? Or does he think only about the things that happen within those doors?

Jungkook stops by the stairwell and looks over his shoulder at you with a small smile.

Now seeing him in royal noble clothes instead of his usual armor, he looked like a real King. In a navy blue suit and a waistcoat on top with a black cloak, the finishing touch of the accessories because of his title, made him look really handsome. You liked this side of him better too.

Before you could think of it too much, he takes your hand and starts heading upstairs. The stairs are long, but when Jungkook starts making his way up faster, you have to speed walk to keep up with him. Your breath hitches as Jungkook pulls you to him and kisses your forehead as a sign of appreciation. He then puts his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him.

It feels comfortable. Too comfortable.

You can feel him inhale deeply when you pull away after what feels like hours.

He then continues moving until the two of you arrived at a room with silver doors. In front of it stood three servants. From the looks of their long hair and sharp pointy ears, they were elves. Bowing to you and their Majesty, they step aside to let you in.

Jungkook opens the door wider so you enter first.

The inside of the room is nothing short of breathtaking. The floor is painted in deep royal purple and silver. The ceiling is made of crystal clear glass tiles and the curtains hanging down from there look like they might break off at any second. You’re amazed at everything. So many things that you couldn’t even name.

This was completely a different room comparing to the room when you first woke up. Did he changed his chambers?

“Where do you want to sit? On that large couch or that loveseat?” He nods his head towards where you noticed a few chairs placed near a big window.

“Let's sit on the couch,” you say quietly, now feeling shy all of a sudden.

Once you are in the soft cushion facing the window seeing a Stary night sky above, the room suddenly gives a soft purple light when it eliminates your surroundings around you.

You’re surprised when you notice Jungkook already sitting next to you on the couch, his leg thrown over the other while his chin rests in top of his palms.

He looks at you with hooded eyes, a little bit more serious now.

“Are you alright, my love?”

Your heart skips several beats hearing such a sweet nickname come out of his beautiful mouth. His lips curled upwards ever so slightly when he saw your blush.

“Yea. I am.”

“Alright,” he smiles softly. “Now are you hungry?”

You nod,” A lot.”

When you say that, there is a knock against the door which brings you an idea who it is.

“Your Majesty, I brought the food You requested,” Moe sounds a little scared.

It seems he was afraid Jungkook would be angry at him again for forgetting.

Looking over at the entrance, you see the servant opening the doors, the one you called over earlier, standing nervously under Jungkook’s gaze. He bows quickly before walking further into the room to set down a tray with food on the coffee table.

He then backs away slowly until he finds a corner to stand in waiting patiently for Jungkook.

“Eat,” Jungkook says, not wanting to waste any time with the unnecessary company and grabs your wrist and guides you back into sitting position on the sofa next to him.

“Jungkook….”

You can hear him growl underneath his breath causing your cheeks to heat up. It doesn’t seem like you are getting anything out of him, so you decide that it’s best that you listen to what he has to say without interrupting him. After finishing the last piece of chicken you move to the cupcakes next for the dessert.

Taking your fork, you grab the strawberry filling and try your best to get the amount that you wanted by yourself. It’s not exactly easy because the strawberries are super hard to pick apart. You have to use the tips of your fingers to carefully remove the fruits from their places before eating them. They were a bit tough but you managed to get every single one of them into your mouth and swallowed it whole.

It was delicious, you’ll give it to them that.

Jungkook just stares at you with his full attention, never taking his eyes off you since you started eating.

There’s something about the way he watches you, his dark eyes fixated on yours, almost like he’s hypnotized, you don’t think that it’s normal for anyone else.

You can see him staring at you, not just for a moment here and there, but really looking at you and watching your every action. This is very unlike the man you fell in love with. If he were to continue watching you like that and stare you into submission, you wouldn’t object at all.

You’d gladly accept his affection, your eyes falling into him as well while he continues to watch you.

Then, without warning, his eyes lose focus. You frown at the loss, you didn’t know what caused that reaction but before you could ask him what happened he clears his throat and shifts his gaze to the plate beside him.

“Have you had enough?” He asks quietly, reaching for another piece of cupcake.

You reach for the tea and sip it slowly when you nod,” I think so.”

After drinking the rest of the liquid, you lean back on the chair and put the empty teacup on the end table besides the seat. Jungkook leans forward, holding his face between his hands.

For a moment, you can’t help but stare at him, admiring his beauty for quite a long time.

His hair falls perfectly into place, his golden eyes twinkle beautifully. You wish you could see him like this all the time. All the time.

And as if he sensed you staring at him, he tilts his head and locks eyes with you.

You avert your gaze quickly. When did you become so bold?

You look at the window then back to Jungkook.

Jungkook looks back at you and smirks,” I thought you weren’t going to stare anymore.”

You scoff and roll your eyes playfully, you can’t help yourself.

With his hands, Jungkook lifts the hair behind your ear, then moves a strand of hair aside, placing his palm on either side of your face, caressing it gently with his thumb.

Your heart beats fast when you feel the warmth from his touch.

“I was just thinking of something else,” you reply in a low voice trying not to make eye contact with him.

What should you say? How could you explain your thoughts to him? You can't just blurt out all of your emotions to him.

He moves his thumb down to your neck and gently rubs the spot where your pulse lies.

"How does my collar feel?"

"Mmm…” you groan when your skin comes into contact with his warm finger. “It feels nice.”

He lowers his head close to yours.

“Do you feel it pulsating?”

You bite your lip lightly before nodding slowly.

"Good." He kisses you on the cheek, leaving a trail of tiny kisses all the way down to the edge of your jaw. "I'm so glad you're enjoying yourself.”

Your hands go to hold on his shoulders as he leans closer to you, brushing your nose against his and giving you goosebumps.

You feel your body heating up instantly at his closeness. You're too busy being lost in his intoxicating scent to notice how his pupils start to dilate slowly. The only thing you can focus on right now is the hand on your thigh.

As he begins to lower his hands down to rest in front of you, he presses his cold hands against your heated thighs.

“Kisses are supposed to feel good don’t you agree?” His voice is husky but it sends shivers down your spine.

You don't answer. Instead you open your legs wider for him to slip his hands inside of your skirt. Your panties immediately dampen with your arousal at the thought of him touching you there.

He kisses you softly and runs his tongue along the edge of your lips. You moan when he makes his way down your neck.

Then you feel him biting you gently at the same time sucking slightly on a soft spot below your collarbone, making your eyes flutter closed tightly when the sensations begin to overwhelm you.

"Jungkook,” you whisper, not being able to take it anymore.

The sound of someone clearing their throat by the door causes Jungkook to stop moving.

“Oh, I'm sorry to bother you both. I'll come back later.” It's Moe. His tone much higher than before.

"No problem," Jungkook speaks with a low, sexy tone in his voice as he leans back from your neck while still keeping his hands firmly attached on you. "We finished anyway."

Oh god, my heart!

"You Majesty, I'll leave you two alone then." You hear the door closing after the servant leaves.

You feel embarrassed when you realize that Moe probably saw you with Jungkook doing more than just talking.

"I... I'm sorry," you mumble, feeling extremely shy.

"Don't be." He gives you a gentle smile, making your heart skip a beat.

You look back outside the window and sigh. This whole day has been a big mess and you don’t even know if your father is safe with the vampires attacking your palace.

That is why you find yourself asking, “Jungkook? Why are they attacking my palace? Why are all of these things happening to me?”

You turn towards him again when he gets up.

"Because they want your blood," he states calmly and stands in front of you.

"W..." you don’t understand. What does he mean by that? Is this some kind of sick joke? You need to understand! "What do you mean they want my blood?!”

"The one who attacked the castle. He’s going to attack your family, your friends, your kingdom if he doesn’t get his revenge.”

You’re taken aback, what? That wasn’t possible, surely, your father can stop this from happening? No...it doesn’t make sense. This couldn’t be happening. There must be some mistake.

You shake your head, denying everything that he says. There must be an explanation, maybe it isn’t true. Maybe it will all be okay.

But you can’t deny reality.

“Jungkook...what am I going to do if they harm my father? What will happen to my mother and kingdom?” You can’t keep it in anymore, tears starting to form at the corner of your eyes.

“They won’t hurt him, Y/n. I promise you.” Jungkook assures you, placing a warm hand on your trembling ones.

“I don’t believe you.” You whisper through the tears running down your face.

“Listen to me,” he places his free hand over yours, making your fingers curl around his. “I’m going to make sure that nothing happens to him. Nothing at all.”

“Promise?” You ask desperately.

Jungkook nods and puts his forehead against your own. “On my life and honor, I promise.” He repeats his words, tightening his grip on your small hand.

"Thank you...for everything..." you mumble, feeling the urge to cry again.

Jungkook smiles and pecks your forehead gently, “Your safety and happiness is what matters the most. I would do anything for you. Anything at all, Y/N.” He brings his mouth to meet your own, kissing you deeply, passionately.

When he breaks away from your lips, he cups your face in his hands. You let out a gasp at his sudden movements. Jungkook smirks when he notices this.

“Can I ask you something?”

You nod your head vigorously,” Yes.”

Jungkook takes a deep breath and starts tracing little circles with the pad of his thumb on the bottom of your chin.

“Are you sure that it’s okay if we continue?”

He whispers as he glances down at the red mark his teeth left behind.

You chuckle and press a soft kiss onto his fingertips. “Of course. I trust you.”

"Alright, I have a confession to make," he says as he stares straight into your eyes with his bright orbs glistening under the moonlight.

“Okay...I guess that means I have to confess too then.” You chuckle nervously.

He nods his head.

“Ugh, this is embarrassing...” you laugh awkwardly and try your best to hide your burning blush.

"Go ahead."

“It’s about this morning. When we were...uh, you know...” you stutter, not wanting to bring up the topic.

Jungkook chuckles,“I see.”

"Yeah....so... um.."

"You wanted to give it to me right?" He interrupts you, making you gulp anxiously.

He looks at you for a second before continuing. “If we’re gonna continue, then you shouldn’t have held me off like that. I’ve had enough teasing. We can’t go on like that. Tempting a man such as myself is never good enough when you know my intentions.”

"S...sorry..."

He grabs your cheeks and kisses you hard. He lets his tongue invade your mouth as he wraps both of his arms around your waist and carries you towards your bed.

You gasp as he lowers you onto your bed before unbuttoning his jacket with the waistcoat and removing the cloak from his shoulders. Pulling his shirt over his head and tossing it aside to reveal his muscular tattooed torso underneath. He removes his pants quickly afterwards. He climbs on top of you, straddling your hips before positioning himself in front of your entrance.

"Are you sure you wanna do this again?"

You bite your lips before answering honestly, “Yes.”

His gaze softens. He looks so vulnerable right now. And you’re the one he wants. He reaches down and lifts the hem of your dress above your knees. He slips his hand inside the gap between your thighs and strokes the sensitive skin lightly across your center.

You gasp when your underwear touches his fingers, his touch feeling incredibly soothing.

His other hand moves from your leg up to your breast and squeezes one of your nipples between his thumb and forefinger.

Since it was a dress with layers underneath, there was no bra.

You close your eyes tightly and grab onto his hair, trying to pull him closer to you.

"Please...” you whimper.

He pulls his hand away from your breast and slides it down your stomach until he reaches your panties. He pushes them down your legs and tosses them aside. Before you can protest, he reaches over the bed to retrieve something from his jacket and with wide eyes see him taking a small dagger with diamonds. You were surprised by the move that you didn’t even stop him for tearing your dress down with the knife when the poor clothing came apart before his eyes, reveling your bare body.

Taking the knife in his mouth, you look at him shocked when he pulls the dress off of you completely, leaving you cold.

What the hell just happened?

Grabbing the handle, Jungkook takes it out of his mouth and tosses it aside when you hear the dagger falling to the ground.

When he gives you a dark gaze and catches you watching him with something like desire and daze, he can’t help but smirk.

“Don’t worry about the dress, I will buy you thousands of them if you want.”

He leans forward and kisses you again. His tongue traces your lower lip and his fingers slowly enter you, causing your core to tighten with desire. A shaky moan escapes your lips as you move your hips up, trying to push him further inside of you.

He smiles against your lips before taking a hold of your wrists and pinning them above your head.

“Tell me what you want, little one,” he whispers seductively in a low voice .

"Make love to me," you reply breathlessly, looking up at him.

You notice a wicked smirk forming on his face. "So eager.”

Your brows furrowed together. "What does that mean?"

"Nothing, I love how eager you are. Come here."

After saying this, Jungkook grabs your ankles and pulls your legs apart. You gasp from the pain as he begins to rub your clit with his thumb while his fingers playfully pinch your nipples and tease your inner walls, driving you crazy.

"Mmmmh! Ahhh! Hmfh!" You cry out loud. Jungkook immediately stops once you call for him. He rests his forehead against yours, panting heavily.

"Was that good?"

"Ya! It was amazing!" you say excitedly.

Jungkook laughs softly at your excitement, but then he continues with what you want him to do.

"Do you really want me to fuck you, Y/n?"

You nod eagerly, "Yes! Please! Do whatever you want! Just please..." you trail off, breathing heavily as he takes off his underwear and thrusts his hips slowly into your wet entrance, taking you by surprise how big he is, the size stretching your walls painfully.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry, princess. Forgive me, I can’t be gentle. You feel so good,” he apologizes, burying his face deeper into your neck.

“No, it’s ok. Just do as you please,” you assure him as you place your arms around his neck. You feel him smile against your skin.

He picks up a steady pace, thrusting more forcefully into you than before, almost hitting your cervix multiple times, his pace faster and faster as he goes deeper. Your breathing turns heavy, and your body trembles from the pleasure.

“Ah!! Yes... yes…” You scream out loudly as another wave of orgasm hits you, your pussy clenching instinctively and clenching even tighter around him.

The feeling makes him groan when he suddenly grips your neck tightly with his hand as he enters you even more deeply with his thick cock.

He thrusts fast, filling you completely and letting his balls graze against your entrance and sending shivers down your spine. You cling tightly onto his shoulders, your nails digging into his bare back. The sensation is intense, overwhelming. It feels painful but so incredible.

"Fuck!!" You gasp as Jungkook releases deep within your core, coming undone as well. You wrap your legs around his hips, pressing yourself against him. He holds your upper thighs tightly, his head resting against your shoulder.

“Jesus fucking Christ…” He breathes, feeling his heart rate increase exponentially. You could practically see his whole body shaking from holding his release.

You take deep breaths in order to calm yourself. You don't even want to think about how sweaty you both are at this point.

‘I can’t believe I just did that. I just did the things I never thought I'd ever do. But it felt so right.

You can hear his heavy breathing against your ear. “Are you okay?” He asks in a raspy voice.

You smile sheepishly and nod your head, “I am fine.”

Jungkook still haven’t pulled his cock out of you . Instead, he keeps it buried inside of you, rubbing it against your entrance every few minutes.

“Look at you, so good for me," Jungkook praises you quietly.

You blush and turn away shyly.

‘Why is it so hard to look him in the eye now?

“Did I hurt you, angel?” Placing a kiss on your shoulder, he flips you over so you’re laying on your stomach and the angle makes his length push deeper into your folds when he inserts it back in.

“God, you’re so tight,” He moans as he starts moving slowly, carefully.

Your entire body tenses up at the sound of his voice and the realization that he is not done yet. Every drag of his big shaft inside your walls made your core sensitive and aching for more.

He kisses your neck softly and nibbles on the tender flesh with his warm tongue.

“Humm...so tight, princess.”

“Again?” You ask as you close your eyes, allowing him to get even deeper inside of you.

“Again,” he says with lust and passion laced in his tone.

“Oh God….” You let out another shaky breath and relax your body completely.

You're not going to lie; you enjoy this. Being filled up by someone else. Feeling someone touch you in a way that no one has ever touched you before. This isn't just sex anymore - it's something far more intimate, much deeper. Something only Jungkook knows how to do. You could stay like this forever if you want to. All of this...

All of this is what made you realize why you let him do this. Why you were so nervous all morning, scared that maybe, just maybe, he wasn’t serious about you. That you wouldn’t mean as much to him as he meant to you.

But you know that isn’t true. He’s given you everything that is needed to know him: his trust, his honesty, his respect, his caring, his gentleness and patience, and above all, his love.

“I love you,” you tell him through the haze of arousal that surrounds your mind.

He suddenly stops when he hears your confession .

"What did you say?" He asks cautiously.

You open your eyes and glance up at him, "I said I love you," you repeat as he pulls his dick out of you slightly and watches as you come undone once more.

He doesn't respond though. Instead, he places both of his hands underneath your ass, lifting you up so you're sitting. He pushes his shaft deep inside of you, making you moan softly. Then, he lowers himself so that he can rest his chin on top of your head.

"Say that again.”

"I love you."

"Again," he says sternly, his thrusts becoming more rougher.

"I love you," you repeat when you whimper from his movements.

A slight grin forms on his lips. "That’s enough,” he whispers kissing your neck softly,” I love you too, little one,” and thrusts harder inside of you, taking you further into his depths each time.

You cry out louder with each passing moment, the sensations intensifying.

“Jungkook!”

His lips press against your ear. "Shh, darling. Relax, we're almost there,” he encourages in a soft voice. He lets go of one of your hip bones with his right hand and uses the other to massage the swollen bud in your clit, causing you to whimper from the pressure and tightening your grip on him.

He continues stroking you and continuing to thrust into you as you come undone for him again and again until you can' stand anymore and you collapse beneath him.

“Jungkook, I'm going to die," you say breathily, trying your best to catch your breath.

He chuckles lightly, "Don't joke, baby,” He assures you with concern lacing his voice.

"Let me help you," he adds while pulling your legs apart to see his cock still stuck deep inside you, your juices leaking out of your hole, the sight so beautiful when he pulls your butt-cheeks apart. ‘’Damn, you’re so tight, princess. Don’t worry, we’ll go slower,’’ he smiles, massaging your pussy.

You close your eyes, enjoying the feeling of having his cock inside of you, the pressure, the warmth, the closeness... the love he has for you.

You start moving your hips to meet his slow strokes. You could literally feel every single muscle inside of him flex and contract when he goes inside of you again and again.

"I'm gonna explode soon," you moan.

"Then let me come inside of you,” Jungkook growls, his voice full of need and desire.

“I want you to come inside of me. Please, Jungkook. Let me feel your dick all inside of me."

Jungkook's eyes flash dark for a second. He looks so intense, and it's all because of you.

His body stiffens for a moment and then relaxes again as he thrusts faster inside of you.

"I've got to fuck you so fucking deep. Let me fill your sweet pussy. Let me fill you."

"Yes!" You beg as he pumps harder inside you, his rhythm becoming faster and faster.

He leans forward as he thrusts in a quick motion. Your fingers dig into the bed sheets as he slams against your clit repeatedly, pushing his erection all the way into you.

“Ah! Ahhh! Oh fuckkk!” You scream out as pleasure overtakes your senses, bringing tears to your eyes.

“Fuckkkkkkk!!!”

You can’t hold it in anymore. Every movement of his cock inside of you, every thrust, every loud moan leaving your mouth, it drives you insane.

"Fuckkk! Fucking, oh god. Ohgodohgod," you gasp desperately as the orgasm consumes you.

"My goddess. My angel. My everything. Oh fuckkkkkkk.... I can't take it,” he groans loudly as he comes inside of you one last time, his hot semen filling you to the brim. There was too much of it because you felt it dripping between your cheeks.

Both of you lay together on the bed for a long time afterwards, panting heavily. His cock is still lodged deep inside of you as you feel it twitch, ready to be released at any second but the third time would be too much. You were completely drained from the things he did to you.

But seeing how happy it made him. The pain was worth it.

“Come here.” He mutters softly, turning around in the bed and pulling you toward him, wrapping his arms around your middle.

He rests his head on the crook of your neck and pulls you closer to his chest.

“How was it? Was it everything you thought it would be?” He asks quietly.

“Yes. Thank you, Jungkook.”

“Thank you? For what?”

You sigh deeply as a small smile spreads across your face.

“Everything. You.”

“I love you, angel,” he murmurs softly against your skin as he hugs you tighter,” you don’t have to thank me. Just know that I’m always here for you. Always. I care about you so much.”

A small chuckle escapes your lips as you bury your face into the crook of his neck but then realization hits you.

“Jungkook?”

He hums in question but when there is no reply from you, he glances at you.

“What is it?”

You try to hide your face in the pillow when you murmur back,” I’m now pregnant?”

His hold tightens on you when leans back to look down at you,” Why do you say that?”

You blush deeper,” You came inside of me like from those romance books where the male releases his sperm in the female in order to get her pregnant. So I am now pregnant?”

Your guard chuckles suddenly, the sound becomes louder each second when he sees how innocently you asked that question. If that were another man, he would be already taking an advantage of you for another round but the thought of you pregnant with his child has him feeling hard again even he doesn’t want to.

It isn’t easy for anyone to see how hard his cock is and when you do… it only makes him feel things worse for him.

“You sure are bold today, aren’t we angel?” He mumbles between gritted teeth before leaning up to give you a sweet yet passionate kiss.

As soon as you realize what’s going on, you push Jungkook away from you and scoot over towards the other side of the bed. A few tears spill from your eyes as you watch his handsome features become contorted by rage.

“Why did you push me away? Do you regret it now?” he asks.

You sniffle,” No! It’s not like that at all Jungkook, I just…”

The way he looks at you makes you feel so uncomfortable that you can’t even think straight.

But before you could finish, he has already picked you up bridal style and starts carrying you to the big bathroom.

“Please put me down! Let go of me right now!”

He laughs darkly but does as told,” You should know better angel than to reject my love. After all, we belong together.”

He throws you harshly onto the tub filled with bubbly hot water, startling you enough so that the water slops all over the edges and drips onto you.

The room is filled with heavy silence except for your shaky breathing. He sits on the edge of the bathtub and watches as you lay there, naked breasts heaving from your quick breaths as if it is taking everything in you to keep yourself awake.

“Will you behave now?” Your guard stands up to his full height and you see his dick hardening at the sight of you in the tub.

Ignoring how large and red it is with white specks of cum from earlier activities, that brings you back why you’re mad at him.

“No,” you blankly answer him.

“No?”

He asks, raising an eyebrow while crossing his arms against his chest. His muscles ripple under his skin and you can feel them tense in irritation.

“Yes!” you scream angrily, causing the temperature in the bathroom to rise,” You forced yourself upon me and now you want to punish me for it. Taking me like you have always wanted, now you can’t take responsibility for it! I might have your baby!”

You point at his dick with every word and he doesn’t seem fazed even though all color had drained from his face and you are now shouting at him without mercy.

“And I hate you for this! I despise-oghhhm,” he doesn’t let you finish when steps into the bath and lifts you up against his body, his wings sprouting from his back making you flinch when you’re embraced in darkness with his scent engulfing you and wet skin pressed against yours. You can feel him shaking under you as he takes your lips, his touch burning your skin.

“If anything happens to our baby, I swear to God,” his voice is hoarse,” I’ll kill everyone involved. Especially myself but never talk to me that way again. You’re fucking mine!” he hisses against your lips before roughly biting your lower lip before pulling away and looking you in the eye.

“Do you understand me?” he whispers huskily against your ear as his hands move around to grab your ass before yanking it forward so that it presses against his hard rock hard dick.

“Yea, I understand,” you whisper breathlessly as you feel him rub against your red folds.

Before long he is inside you, slowly thrusting his hips inside you one slow movement at a time. It drives you crazy when he moves like that in you. You close your eyes to savor his movements. Each thrust feels like a lightning bolt, sending pleasure coursing through your veins until finally, the tension builds and you scream out loud, reaching out to wrap your legs around his waist and digging your nails into his back.

When you feel your orgasm hit, he growls and slams into you harder, harder, faster as he releases deep within you and almost crushes you with his body against the wall when he lazily continues to thrust.

“That wasn’t so bad now, right?” he asks after calming himself down.

“I think I preferred that,” you moan in reply as your hands slide across his naked back until they find their way onto his face, caressing the skin underneath as he lowers himself to rest his forehead against yours. He kisses you passionately for a moment, letting you catch your breathe before pressing light kisses along your jawline to reach your neck and leaving a lingering mark against the spot where he first bit you.

“I think my girl loves it rough.” His words make you lower you eyelashes in embarrassment when you try to cover your flushed cheeks but when his wings retreats back a bit to give you some light, Jungkook runs his thumb over your lips and chuckles deeply,” Who could have thought that the princess from a royal family will act this way,” he purrs softly into your ear as he pulls back and cups your cheek gently before kissing you gently, his tongue teasingly slipping past your parted lips before pulling back to stare you dead in the eye.

“I hope that my little princess likes to stay in shape because this is not the last time that I’d fuck you in a bath,” he growls low and deep as his hands roam over your body and you bite your lip hard to prevent any noises from leaving your mouth.

“But first, let’s get married. Then you won’t need to worry anymore.”

The words made you freeze.

“B-But, Jungkook…my father…you told him that you will ask for my hand in marriage only when I turn twenty one,” you mutter softly when you look at him worriedly.

“Doesn’t matter now. Now, you’re here with me. You will come to live with me. And you’re going to marry me.”

“But..why?” you whimper.

“Because…” he stops speaking for a while.

Looking deeply into your eyes, he smiles and grabs your chin with his fingers, forcing you to look directly into his gaze as he leans down to plant soft yet firm kisses along your jaw line and eventually trailing them downwards towards your neck.

“Because…because… I love you, little one. Because I care about you more than I cared about anything else in my entire life. I couldn’t bear the thought of anyone ever taking you from me.”

His deep raspy voice breaks your heart.

A broken smile forms itself on your lips when he finishes speaking.

‘Is this really happening? Is this really Jungkook?’ you wonder silently as you close your eyes and lean your head against his shoulder, enjoying the moment for what it may be.

Be continued…

p.s. All images and gifs are not mine, some of the edits are mine edited but not every picture. All the credit goes to their rightful owners

DO NOT REPOST THIS WORK AS YOUR OWN BECAUSE THIS IS THE ORIGINAL OWNER’S STORY

If you like, please reblog or like the post so I can post the next chapters :)

🅒 All rights reserved

[2af-afterdark]

Hell of a Tail

Rating: Explicit

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply

Category: F/M

Fandom: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!

Relationship: Main Character/Satan

Characters: Satan, Main Character

Additional Tags: afab!MC (you/your), Tail sex, Cat cosplay (sexy), rough sex, pet play(?), dom/sub, blood, degradation, aftercare, implied Poly!MC

Summary: The brothers told you once that it was dangerous to be caught in a sexual situation with them and their demon forms. You really should risk finding out why, but… you are guilty as giving into instincts as much as any of them.

Word Count: 2975

You had planned today to the T. It had been so long since you and Satan had a date night, especially one where you tried to use your charms to get him into bed. So you cut out the middleman and decided to wait for him in his bed while he was out. Even better you knew just how to rile him up. He always called you Kitten, so… why not be a real one for him? A set of fake ears and tail that hooked onto the dark nightie you had put yourself in were all it would take to drive him wild and you couldn’t wait.

So when you heard the sound of his door opening, you felt your heart flutter in your chest. You threw yourself across his bed, striking your most seductive pose. As soon as his door was open and his eyes fell on you, he stared in confusion.

“What are you doing?” Satan asked.

“Seducing you,” you clarify, “Is it working?”

He closes his eyes and chuckles slightly, “Yes. Very seductive, Kitten.”

You grab the end of your tail and spin it around gently, “Glad you noticed. Now, I believe someone likes to cuddle the kitties they find and I don’t want to be the exception.”

“You’re being rather forward today,” he said, but that didn’t stop him from climbing into the bed with you, crawling on top of you, and greeting you with a tender kiss, “To what do I owe this lovely surprise?”

You put on your best pout to tease him, “Your little kitten was feeling lonely. I missed you…”

“I haven’t gone anywhere. All you have to do is ask me.”

“Yeah, but you’re the only one that never comes to me . It makes me feel like you don’t want me sometimes.” Even Levi had a better track record of asking you for intimacy.

“Sorry.” He kissed you again, this time peppering them down your neck and nipping at the flesh there, “You know I love you.”

“I know.” You weave your hand through his hair, stroking his head, “But it seems like I have to tempt you into sin.”

He looked up at you from where he was and raised a single eyebrow, “You’re going to tempt a demon into sin?”

“Of course I am.” You puffed your chest out with pride, “I even went to the professionals this time, so I am more than prepared.”

“Professionals?”

“I, uh, got some help with the outfit.” You were ashamed to admit that, but it happened. There was no reason not to ask those who knew better than you for assistance if they were there. Plus, they had been more than happy to help.

Something flashed in his eyes for a moment, but it was gone before you could identify what it was, “So someone else saw you like this?” The thought of that pissed him off…

“Oh, don’t pout. Jealousy doesn’t look good on you.” You put your hands on the sides of his face and pull him up to kiss his forehead before closing your eyes and snuggling against him, “This is just for us, so relax.”

You laid there in silence with him, finding comfort in just feeling his skin against yours. It was something you couldn’t take for granted, even if what you wanted was… less innocent. It was deep and caring, trusting and vulnerable. And you just wanted to lie there like that… until something slid against your upper leg, wrapping around your thigh and giving a gentle squeeze. Your eyes snap open at the feeling and you glance down in a panic. Like a snake coiling around its prey, Satan’s tail has wrapped itself around you.

“S-Satan, your t-tail…” Did he realize it was out?

“What about it, Kitten?” He gazes down at you lovingly, his green eyes glowing in the darkness of the room and his fangs flashing faintly just behind his lips. Atop his head, his horns are already out in full.

“It’s out…” Maybe he wasn’t far enough gone and could be reasoned with.

“I suppose it is.” For a moment, it seemed he may back off, but instead you felt the very tip of his tail shift so it could run along your slit, just over your underwear. You gasped at the feeling, which had him laughing, “Do you like it?”

Asmo warned you once not to let any of them be intimate with you while they were in their demonic forms. They lost all sense of self-control the further they shifted into their demon forms. Every demonic urge they had was amplified the more they shifted over. Owning you, touching you, having you beg for them… those urges were especially strong and they lost the ability to hold back and be gentle with you; and for some of them, the sudden inability to be gentle was incredibly dangerous.

Plus, you had learned a little too much about their shift. You knew parts of them changed since they grow horns and tails and wings, but you hadn’t really thought about what other parts of them may change form too… Between that and the sudden lack of control, you risked genuinely getting hurt during their shifts.

“You have to let me go, Satan.” You can’t bring yourself to look him in the eyes, afraid to see just how far he has fallen. You had seen them all in their demonic forms before, but you feared looking at it right now.

His fingers slipped into your mouth to shut you up before you could say anything to stop him, “Shh, Kitten. Just lie back and let me make you feel good. That’s what you came here for, right?” His tail pressed against the wet spot that was growing on the fabric of your underwear, focusing a little too closely on the small sensitive cluster of nerves that drove you crazy.

“Thtan.” You try to speak around his fingers, but the words don’t come out correctly, “No moe.” You couldn’t handle the feeling of having him tease you so intimately, especially because your pleasure and fear were starting to mix together in a way that fogged your mind. This wasn’t exactly what you came here for, but it was sure as hell filled you with the same rolling heat and fire.

The growl that comes deep from in his throat sends a spark down your spine, “Are you sure? Because this part of you is saying something different.” The ridges on his tail rubbed you in turn, filling you with both fear and a sense of excitement at the feeling.

When you refuse to answer him, he pushes forward. The end of his tail slips under your panties, wrapping around them and tugging on them roughly until they are ripped off of you, “Isn’t this what you enjoy? You love being good for me, don’t you?”  As he spoke, you felt his free hand creep under the loose, flowing fabric of your nightie until it finally rested against your breast. His nails were sharp against your skin, digging into you ever so slightly; a sign his claws were out.

Something bubbled up inside of you when he mentioned you being good for him. He knew that phrase got to you and he was exploiting the way it made you feel so that you wouldn’t fight against him. Damn, did it ever work, “I’ll be good for you, Master.” You knew better than to agree to this situation, but you had to admit that your logic skills flew out the window whenever he told you to behave for him. Even if he didn’t mean it sexually, you wanted to be good for him in every way.

“That’s my good kitten.” He released your tongue and removed his fingers from your mouth, finally allowing you to get a good look at the sharpened claws very quickly moving to cut away the string at your shoulder that kept your lingerie held up. You could scold him later for ruining your clothing so callously, especially something so cute.

His breath was hot against your skin as he dipped down against your chest, his fangs brushing along your breasts and drawing a small trickle of fresh blood. The trail didn’t get far, as he ran his tongue over the end of the red drip and followed it back to its source where he laid kisses to his marking. The spot would be a scar in the morning, the only kind of marks he ever left on you.

Satan’s hands dropped to your waist, his nails pressing into your tender flesh to keep you steady while he plays with you how he wills. The tip of his tail prods against your wet folds, watching your face twist in shock as he sinks it in slowly, “Mine.” And, being his, he could do what he wanted with you.

You bite your bottom lip, trying to relax so the intrusion is more bearable. His tail was brutal, full of ridges that each individually and abruptly stretched you as they went in. Unfortunately, that didn’t stop him from going just a little too quickly with you, as each segment pushed in just before you could adjust to the previous one, leaving you a mess of pants and groans as you desperately tried to accommodate him.

The way your mouth hung open to allow a constant stream of lewd noises to fall out of it was not helping him hang onto his rationality any better. You were practically helpless underneath him, a delicate human in the grip of something much more powerful than you could ever be. It was like you were purposefully trying to be eaten alive by the demon inside of him and you didn’t know how to fight back.

Of course, you could subdue him with a single word, but he knew you wouldn’t unless you were really in danger because of your strange insistence on not using your pacts unless you had no other choice. Though, he was grateful for that strange quirk of yours since it meant he could take complete control of you tonight.

His hands grabbed at your wrists, gripping them so tightly that you felt the bruises starting to form immediately as he propped them over your head, “So, who else saw you like this?” He wasn’t the jealous type, unlike his older brothers, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t have something in store for you after flaunting yourself in front of others. Depending on who it was, it may change how angry he was that his other brothers got to see you before he did.

You turned your head to look away, feeling your core growing even hotter as he pushed one last segment of his tail into you and leaving you feeling painfully full. He was already punishing you, ready to make it worse if you gave him an unacceptable answer. That was the trick though; there was no correct answer, only degrees of worse.

“Levi helped me find the ears and tail. Asmo helped me pick out and try on the outfit.” You couldn’t even pretend to lie as he stared down at you so intensely. You were sure he would see right through you if you tried. It was better not to make him any angrier than he already was.

He smiled down at you, “What a good kitten. So honest.” He sang your praises as another portion of his tail slid into you slowly, fighting to fit inside your already full cunt. He didn’t say anything, only listening to you mewl and moan in pleased agony as you were stuffed beyond your limits, completely unaware just how much he could and would push your limits before he was satisfied, “Anything else you need to confess?”

“L-like what?” Was there something specific he was looking for? You couldn’t think of anything else he could be upset about.

“Like how I know a slut like you definitely let them fuck you as thanks, rather than coming straight to me.” Even though this outfit was supposed to be all for him, you’d let others see the pieces that made it up and he just knew you’d spread your legs for them after. He was pissed you didn’t just come to him to scratch any itches you had.

“I’m not a slu- ahhh~ ” You can’t finish the statement as even more of his tail stretches you open. You can’t recall ever being so full in your life. Certainly stretched, but never filled. Especially by something with so many ridges and bumps and could twist and turn inside of you in any way it wished. The very tip of his tail was already wriggling inside of you and you could feel it.

“Don’t lie, Kitten. Anyone that saw how well your cunt is taking me right now would know that you’re a slut that enjoys anything done to them.” Just to prove his point, he pulled out the segment of his tail that he had just pushed into you. It came out more smoothly than it had gone in, turning the pain of your fullness into a pleasant relief that had you moaning involuntarily, “See? Now, be a good slut for me and take your punishment.”

He licked his lips at the sight of you and your ruined clothing, imagining just how much more he could do to you before he was sated, “Stay just like this.” His hands released your wrists for the first time and he stared at the bruises that he had left on them. It was beautiful to see you like this.

“Good kitten. Keep it up and I may forgive you.” Of course, demons didn’t play fair so there was no way Satan would give you the chance to maintain your composure.

His claws trailed down your arms and waist, leaving red trails in their wake. It was a chore to keep from crying out at the feeling, but you did it. However, you lost it when his tail pulled out of you suddenly, stretching you quickly with each section that he removed.

“ Gaugh~ ” You couldn’t stop yourself from gasping and squirming as a foreign heat started to spread through you. Every section he pulled out left you gaping and needy, suddenly feeling very empty. You wanted him so badly, and he was refusing to satisfy you, “Satan… Please….”

“Satan?” His nail dug into you in warning, “I don’t recall kittens calling their owners by name.” His tail curled against your clit, rubbing it simultaneously with his thrusts, “Has that brain of your completely turned to mush already?”

You whine and grip your fists into the bed, feeling your first orgasm tear through your body and causing your legs to quiver, “Master~ I’m sorry. I won’t let others see me like this again, so please give me your cock. Your tail isn’t the same. I want you~” You were used to the cutting and blood, you were used to him degrading you, but you were not used to him denying you for so long. He was usually quick to give you anything you wanted, so this was a new kind of torture.

“My sweet kitten,” Satan moved his hand to your breast, kneading it harshly with a cruel smile, “This isn’t about your pleasure. This is a punishment.” And he knew how badly you wanted to be fucked, so he refused to give it to you. If anything, he was going to do anything but give you what he knew you wanted. Cuts, blood, bruises, and hollow satisfaction as he tormented you endlessly with his tail; that was all he would give you.

“Now,” he leaned over you with a growl, “scream all you want while I make you cum.”

—

You laid facedown in Satan’s bed, legs, cunt, and even breasts thoroughly sore. His hands ran over your fresh wounds, rubbing salve onto them while he apologized profoundly, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have lost myself like that.” He couldn’t believe he had slipped away like that, “How do you feel?”

You look back at him with tired eyes, “Is there a word for fucked out of my mind and yet still wanting?”

He sighed at himself, “Unsatisfied?”

“No. I definitely came… a few times, actually. But…” You buried your face into his pillows, “I really wanted both of us to have fun, but it feels like all you did was play with me…”

“And you should have stopped me. That was dangerous.” And he hated how deep your cuts were compared to the gentle red marks he usually left on you, “But it was my fault for getting so upset when I didn’t need to. It’s unfair to put all the responsibility on you.”

You laugh, “It was strange. I really didn’t expect you to get so upset at something like me asking the others for help. You aren’t the jealous type.”

He was glad you weren’t looking at him anymore because he was humiliated by how red his face had gone, “It was a moment of weakness. Please don’t mention it again.”

“Sure thing.” You agree.

“Also… I did have fun, so don’t worry about me.” He never thought he would be able to do something like that with you, so he was deeply satisfied with the result. There was one other thing he had to take care of now that he was thinking of it, “You know you’re not a slut right? And that I don’t really think that of you?”

“I know.” What he said in bed couldn’t be held against him. Besides, sometimes it was fun to be degraded, “You know I love you, right?”

He smirked and kissed your shoulder blade, his hands holding you gently, “I love you too, Kitten.”

[cjsinkythoughts]

Not Your Captain

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Word Count: 1695

Warnings: Falcon and the Winter Soldier Spoilers!!!!! Lots of Angst in this one, guys, lotta feels, some Fluff to counterbalance it, but mostly Angst, Cursing

A/N: This is Part Two to my previous FATWS writing, His Only Contact. FATWS SERIES STERLIST HERE! This one is from Reader’s perspective and gives you a bit more about Reader’s backstory. There will be multiple parts coming out in the next day or two based just on this new episode because damn. It was loaded!  Due to this and my workload this past week, I haven’t been able to post the first chapter of my College!AU, Erased From the Stars, but I promise it’s coming! This’ll be my main focus for the weekend though! Expect more parts in the next 24 hours! I’ll be making a masterlist for this particular project in that time, too! Taglists are open! Please contact me if you want to be tagged! Thank you and please enjoy, loves! (Not beta’d, so sorry for mistakes!)

AGAIN: SPOILERS UNDER CUT!

The moment you saw it on TV, you knew you had to get to Bucky. You weren’t planning on leaving until the next day, but there was no way you weren’t going. So you caught the first plane you could from the base you were staying at.

You’re feelings were all over the place. Steve had been your best friend for more than the past decade. You were the one there when he first woke up. You were the one to help him get situated. You were the one to help him whenever he needed, to go over to his little place in DC when he was having problems, like the time he thought he was having an asthma attack when it was an anxiety attack or when you had to help him find a new phone after he accidentally broke his.

You were that close to falling in love with him. But life went the other way and, in a weird twist of fate, almost as if the universe wanted to spare you of the heartbreak it knew would come if you gave your heart to the dashing captain, you ended up tripping over your own feet for someone else.

Someone you would never tell.

He was the last thing you had left of Steve and you couldn’t ruin that because of your stupid feelings. And you couldn’t ruin the relationship you had now because it was working. He trusted you, more than anyone else. He trusted you because Steve trusted you and you wouldn’t dare break that trust.

You just hoped, with everything going down in relation to the shield - to his legacy - that you’d be able to keep that promise you made to yourself.

You were in front of his door early in the morning - around four - hesitating to knock. It didn’t take long for him to respond the moment your fist did meet the door.

He looked…tired. You wished, oh how you wished, that you could do more. Anything more. He insisted you helped him plenty already; he claimed he never had nightmares when you were by his side. But it wasn’t enough. Not for what he’d been through. You felt as though you were merely putting a bandaid over a bullet wound.

His chocolate locks were short, above his ears. You could remember how hesitant yet eager he was about doing it. It was difficult to not cut his ear off because he kept moving in anticipation. You would know: you cut it. Those blue eyes that made you trip in the first place were outlined by thick lashes, dark ebony bags beneath them, making the azure pop. He was shirtless, as he usually was when sleeping (or at least trying to sleep), his dog tags resting against his sternum. 

You could tell he hadn’t been sleeping. His eyes were bloodshot as if he was watching TV for too long and his hair was less messy than it would be if he actually slept.

The moment his eyes found yours, his plump, chapped lips turned up into the grin he reserved for you and he was pulling you in. Your reaction was instantaneous, your arms slipping around his waist, your chin resting on his shoulder as he found home in the crook of your neck.

He was touch deprived. You knew this, but you never brought it up. Especially considering you were one of the only people he touched willingly. You didn’t want him thinking he was broken, more so than he thought he was already. And you definitely didn’t want to push him into fixing himself. So you didn’t tell him, even though you were pretty sure he knew, and you just let him take the lead. 

Sometimes it meant he grabbed your hand in large crowds, or tucked you under his arm when he was threatened. Other times it meant laying his head in your lap when he was tired late at night, or a soft hug in greeting.

Hands slowly tracing his spine, fingers dancing up and down his back, you gave a small smile when you felt him practically purring in your embrace. You could never decide if he was more puppy or kitten. You used to make jokes about the three of them, Steve, Bucky, and Sam, being like a puppy, kitten, and bird that you had to reluctantly pet sit for a friend. You would give almost anything to be joking around like that with them when you went to visit Bucky in Wakanda with Steve.

“Buck?”

He hummed. You didn’t want to pull back, you wanted to stay connected with him for as long as possible, but you had to talk. You didn’t want to talk about it, because that would make it more real, but you had to. You had to.

“Have you seen the news recently?”

His eyebrows furrowed, his lips pulling down. “What happened? Is it Wanda?”

You looked down the hall, your lips pressed together tightly, before nodding inside. “We have to talk.”

He nodded, stepping back and pulling you inside. Seeing the makeshift bed on the floor against the far edge of the sofa made you inwardly sigh, but you didn’t say anything about it. Steve was the same way at first.

“Is she okay? Did you find her? Where-”

“It’s not Wanda.” Turning, you faced him, trying to control your own anger at the situation, knowing it wouldn’t help him any. “It’s…it’s about Steve.”

Those spectacularly blue eyes narrowed, bottom lip being sucked in between his teeth. “What about Steve?”

You gestured for him to come closer, holding out your hand in offering. He took it and followed you as you led him to the couch. A cleared throat and a deep breath later found you gently explaining what happened to him. That the government had taken back the shield and had given it to someone else. A ‘hero just for America’. A ‘new Captain America’.

You could see his features harden with every word, his jaw ticking dangerously, his chest heaving and his nostrils flaring. You squeezed his hand as you finished. “He’s got meetings and stuff with senators and governors. They’re taking him on a tour this week. They-they want me to meet him, considering I’m the last of the original seven. Active on Earth, at least.”

The tears that started forming in his eyes made you swallow your own emotions down thickly. He didn’t need your hatred of this wannabe to fuel his own. He needed your support and comfort. He needed to know you’d be by his side through this.

“Are you?”

You blinked, not expecting his first words to be that question. “Am I what?”

“Going to meet with him?”

“I-I…” You stopped talking, knowing that if you continued you’d end up ranting about how he wasn’t your captain. How he could never be your captain. Debating answers, you decided on a simple, blunt reply. “No.”

“Why…” 

Running your thumb over his knuckles, you leaned over slowly to press a chaste kiss to his bare skin and blood shoulder. “Take your time. Collect your thoughts.”

He responded to your words by taking a deep breath, clenching his eyes shut, his jaw so tight you feared he might chip his teeth. It was a tense minute before he said anything, the room being filled with his harsh breathing. “You said he gave them the shield.”

“What?”

“Yesterday. You told me he gave up the shield. They put it in the Smithsonian. But you just said they took it from him.”

“He did give it to them, but-”

“Why?” His eyes snapped open, his features twisting into ones of frustration and resentment. “Why’d he give it to them?”

You shook your head, knowing Sam didn’t mean for any of that to happen. He had called you a few weeks ago to ask about your opinion on the matter. You told him that Steve trusted him, and you trusted Steve, so if Sam thought that was the right thing to do…you trusted him. “It’s not Sam’s fault. Don’t be mad-”

“Don’t be mad?! Don’t be mad?!” Bucky shot up, ripping his hand away from yours, making you bite your lip and hang your head as he paced in front of you. “Steve gave it to him! And he just gives it away like he’s regifting a shitty frisbee as a Christmas present! And you don’t want me to be mad?! Are you fucking kidding me, Y/N?!”

Cringing at the use of your name, which you rarely hear fall from his lips, especially in vexation like just then, you looked up at him, eyes pleading. “Bucky, I get it. I do. I’m mad, too. I’m-I’m furious. But you can’t blame Sam. Please. He just - he’s trying, Buck. Just like me. Just like you. We’re all trying.”

Bucky’s shoulders fell as he stared at you, eyes darting from feature to feature as he studied your face. Before you could say anything else, he was on the floor in front of you, in between your legs, arms wrapped around your waist and face pressed into your stomach.

You could tell he was holding something back - something big - but you wouldn’t push him. You never did. Displaying feelings was always hard for him, even in the early 1900’s; Steve used to tell you stories when you were looking for him after the fiasco in DC. Bucky grew up being the oldest of four and the only boy. On top of that, his best friend was a scrawny, stubborn, punching bag of a boy. According to Stevie, neither of them really learned how to cope or how to deal with feelings. And it showed. Boy, did it show.

Instead of getting on him and asking what was wrong and begging for him to talk to you, your fingers tangled in his hair, nails scratching his scalp, as you sat back to make the position more comfortable for him.

“Stay with me. I need you.”

You leaned down to press a soft kiss to his head, nodding into his hair. “I’ll stay. For as long as you need me, Buckaroo.”

Taglist (OPEN):

@happygoreading​, @thatsdarwinism​, @satellitespidey​

[chanfictions]

Shadow Clones

Part 1 - Chidori

Kakashi x Reader

Here by popular request is the sequel to Chidori.

18+ Content! Minors, DNI!

All of the fun you might imagine one would have in the bedroom with shadow clones. No spoilers this time 🙃.

"Let's play a little game. Can you figure out which of us is the real one?"

3.1k

With a yawning sigh, you stretched exaggeratedly, popping your tired back in a few places as you meandered down the hallway leading to your favorite person's apartment. After a long week of back to back missions, you were ready for some leisurely downtime and some much needed stress relief. Prior to your last mission, you had made plans to have dinner with Kakashi at his place tonight. He sounded quite excited about the idea and went on about how he was going to whip up something very special for you. Despite your best attempts at twisting the information out of him with your sexiest interrogation methods, he remained tight-lipped about it, only smirking from behind that damn mask with a coy hint of, "It's a surprise."

You finally reached his door with a wide grin spreading across your face as you flipped his key into your hand and let yourself in. Tucking the little ninja-hound keychain away in your pocket, you pulled the door shut behind you with a solid click. "Kakashi? I'm back!" You called out into the seemingly empty apartment. Confusion washed over you, as there was no delightful scent of dinner brewing in the kitchen, nor was there any sign that he was even home. Wondering if he had been sent on a last minute mission, you kicked off your shoes at the door and took a peek around the eerily quiet apartment. Your heart dropped for a moment, thinking that maybe he just forgot.

As you peered around the frame of the hallway, you yelped in surprise as a pair of arms coiled around your waist, and a familiar voice hummed in your ear, and familiar lips planted a kiss on your temple. "Hi, kitten."

Squeaking still from the shock of being startled, you whirled around and gave him a playful thump to the chest with a half closed fist as a laugh bubbled from your mouth. "Damnit, Kakashi! One of these days you're going to sneak up on me when I'm tired and you're going to end up stabbed."

He smirked down at you, taking hold of your wrist and giving your knuckles a light kiss. "It's cute that you think you're faster than I am," he teased.

"It's cute that you think I'm so delicate that I couldn't take you in a fight," you taunted back playfully, sticking your tongue out at him.

"Are you sure about that?" Kakashi’s voice chirped from behind you, breath fanning your neck as he placed a kiss just below your jaw.

For half a second, you let out a happy little sigh and melted into the touch. He knew what a sucker you were for that. Then your eyes snapped open, staring up at the far-too-smug-looking Kakashi in front of you. Your overly tired brain entirely malfunctioned. That was impossible, because he was behind you. Who was behind you?? With a high squeak, you spun around again, your back pressing firmly against Kakashi’s chest as you jumped back in surprise. It was still Kakashi’s smug mug staring back at you.

"Hi, kitten," the second said with a cool smirk.

Your eyes widened as it dawned on you that your drunken conversation with Jiraiya was about to come back and bite you for a second time. Oh, shit. He didn't forget about that. After your Chidori-fueled night of fun last week, Kakashi hadn't brought up your steamy little comment to that raunchy old smut machine regarding what else could be done with shadow clones outside the field of battle.

The Kakashi behind you curled his arms around your waist, leaning down to nibble at your neck just as the other one had. "Something the matter?" His inquiry floated so casually into your ear as those lips left nips and bites along your neck.

Caught between a nervous squeak and a moan, your brain was struggling to process that he was both kissing and staring smugly at you right now. "Uh, babe? You know I'm not a sensory type," you bit your lip to contain a breathy gasp as the one behind you ran a hand up your torso.

"Your point?" The one in front of you stepped forward, tipping your chin up to kiss you with the same lips you felt on your neck.

Your cheeks burned with a rush of heat over the embarrassing confusion surrounding your current predicament. A fluttering sensation replaced your heart beat, and a needy heat began to soak your panties. This was insane. "I, um, c-caan't -- teh-heelll which of y-you is the clone," you stammered weakly as the one in front of you grazed your inner thigh with his fingers. Hands were everywhere. It was a struggle to discern who they were attached to without looking. From what you could tell, the one kissing your neck slid warm palms up into your shirt while the other casually popped a button on the front of your pants.

"Let's play a little game, then. If you can figure out which of us is the real one, we'll give you a prize," he murmured from behind you as his rough palms slid under your bra.

"--but, there's a little catch. You see, if you can't figure it out, well, we're just going to have to punish you. That shouldn't be a problem, though. Surely a skilled shinobi like you can figure out who your boyfriend is, right?" The one standing in front of you grasped your chin softly, pointing your flushed gaze up at the tilted lips and coolly amused eyes staring back at you.

He planned this, that foxy jerk. You swallowed hard as a confused wave of arousal crashed over your body. Being the center of a Kakashi sandwich left you struggling to gather the words tangled upon your tongue. Your clothes were falling off at an alarming rate and you found yourself slowly being walked into his bedroom between the two of them. As the one behind you left you gasping with playful pulls and pinches of your nipples, the other was making swift work of the various fasteners on your clothes. "Mmm, define… punish," you breathed, biting your lip while running your hands up the solid chest in front of you, nearly losing your train of thought as a hand slid up your thigh, teasing you through your soaked panties. You felt someone's arousal pressing firmly against your ass. They were both solid. Figuring out who was who seemed impossible.

"Hmmm… maybe we won't tell you and that can be a surprise as well," the one in front of you mused, ghosting your throbbing clit through fabric.

"Who knows? It might end up being fun," the other teased, leaving hot kisses along your jaw.

A needy whine escaped your parted lips as you arched your hips into the hand teasing you through that silky material while working on undressing the Kakashi in front of you, tossing things aside as you went. Their combined efforts left you extremely distracted. Two identical pairs of hands roamed your body, caressing every inch of your skin. A little moan hissed through your teeth as one left biting brands on your neck and kneaded your breasts while the other swallowed your breathy sounds in hungry kisses while teasing you mercilessly through your silk panties, leaving your body pulsing with a lusty ache. Their respective arousals jabbed into either side of you, leaving you wiggling your hips suggestively against them to get them to elicit echoing groans. Hearing Kakashi hum in stereo like that was oddly satisfying.

You squeaked in surprise when you suddenly found yourself falling backwards, as the Kakashi behind you had maneuvered you towards the bed while they distracted you with the panty soaking flurry of hands covering your body. Still with that smug smirk plastered to his face, the one in front of you made swift work of the last article of clothing you had left. Shirts flew casually across the room, and you were flipped over to face one of the two smug, foxy bastards. Biting your lip, you slid one hand up his chest while unbuttoning his pants with the other, giving your hips a playful waggle at the Kakashi that was still on his feet.

A chuckle hummed behind you as that Kakashi shed the last of his clothes, pressing a palm on your lower back and sliding fingers through your slick folds. "Did you want something, kitten?" He inquired coolly, a smile curling at the corner of his lips.

A flush crept across your cheeks as the arousal in front of you sprung free from its cloth confines, in disbelief that you were doing something like this. "I--"

He didn't give you a chance to fully answer that and just slid two fingers into your soaking core, leaving you gasping and grinding yourself into his touch while his counterpart took a fistful of your hair, taking control of your head. "Have you figured it out yet?"

Your back arched, and you mewled as the fingers working your throbbing clit brought you ever closer to the edge. The hot knot of light in your core intensified, stealing your ability to concentrate enough to form words. "Nnnnn," you buzzed, trying to collect yourself and failing miserably.

"I'm sorry. I didn't quite catch that," the voice behind you hummed, now masterfully strumming your clit to a beat that left you gasping for air, stealing your words from you. The only sound you could produce was a quivering whine as his skillful fingertips let up enough just in time to leave you hanging.

With a pathetic whimper, you rolled your hips back into him. "Nnneed more data," you choked out, licking your lips while wrapping your hand around the delicious cock staring you in the face. You swirled your tongue around the tip. Even the taste was real.

They chuckled in unison before delving into your eager body - from behind, sliding achingly slowly into your throbbing core, stretching your walls around a delicious girth, and from the front, pressing your hungry lips down around the meaty arousal that had been twitching in wait by the grip one had on your hair. You groaned loudly around the thickness competing for space in your throat with air as he simultaneously rutted into you from behind. A chorus of contented sounds chimed from all three of you. "Come on, kitten. Surely you have a guess by now," the one behind you murmured huskily as the sound of chirping birds began to echo through the room.

You squealed around the obstruction in your mouth, struggling against the hand pressing your head down as little bolts of lightning struck in thousands of hot, tiny points around your clit, putting a wild arch in your back. You fell down on one elbow, letting out a cry of ecstasy as the surprise onslaught hurled you into oblivion. Your walls clenched and fluttered around the nigh perfect cock railing you from behind. Choking and sputtering, the hand in your hair pulled you up with a lewd pop as the wails of a soul crushing orgasm rang from your chest. A thumb smeared drool across your cheek with quiet laughter vibrating through his body into yours. "Well?"

"Fuuu-huuuck, K-kakaaa-haashiiii!" All you could do was let loose your pleasure-drunk cry into the ceiling as your legs trembled uncontrollably under the electric ministrations that set every nerve in your body ablaze. Muscles contracted involuntarily, leaving you strangling the cock stuffing your soaked pussy with an impossibly tight grip. With a guttural groan, the one behind you dug fingers into your hips roughly, fucking you hard through your unintelligible screaming before abruptly sliding out of you to ease you forward into the waiting grasp of his double like a twisted game of hot potato. You were impaled again, this time by the one beneath you who stifled your surprised moan by pressing your face into his neck. You gasped and stammered at the army of hands moving across your body, still fluttering wildly from that first charged orgasm.

"Do you remember exactly what you told Jiraiya the night you spilled all of your dirty little secrets?" One of them whispered in your ear, though it was difficult to discern the source over your panting.

"Oh, fuck," you whined into the solid chest below you. Of course, you remembered what you told that pervy traitor.

"Say it," they goaded, hands exploring every inch of you while never ceasing the pounding that was sending you into orbit.

You mewled softly, biting your lip to stifle your embarrassment. Heat flushed your cheeks and melded with the broiling sweat that began to slick your body. You wanted to feel both of them inside of your little vice of a pussy. That's what they wanted to hear. They wanted you to tell them that you loved his cock so much that you wanted to be stuffed with it twice. Your face flamed as you struggled to arrange a sentence in your head, but the little tag team duo was making that task incredibly difficult. Hands climbed your front and back, grasping your ass and tangling in your hair. Mouths on your neck, their breathing echoed in surround sound. The cock buried within you left you hungry for more, though you could hardly wrap your preoccupied mind around the logistics. "Please," you breathed against his neck, grinding your hips against his. "I… I want you both -- n-need you both," you whimpered pathetically.

The movements slowed to a halt, leaving you aching for friction as a quiet complaint breezed from your lips. "Such a good girl for us," a voice hummed from behind as you felt another tip sliding through your folds, teasing your already stuffed pussy. The skin strained against the second dribbling tip that was slowly making room for itself as you let out a pained little cry into the solid chest below you. They crooned to and praised you in unison as the second cock slowly worked its way into you. A rush of comforting hands moved across your neck, cradling and kissing your face. Another warm body pressed against you from behind. The beating of their hearts through their chests almost seemed synchronized as the second fully sheathed himself, leaving you moaning and clawing at the chest beneath you, overwhelmed and speechless at the absolute feeling of fullness that was the center of your existence.

"Please," you begged desperately, rolling your hips and hissing a lewd groan into their ears, nipping and biting the shoulder below you, urging them into action. A hand from behind you smothered your own, lacing his fingers around yours as the roller coaster ride of your life began that left you screaming into the abyss.

Two cocks. Two Kakashis. You could barely handle one of him. Seeing double left you drunk on your own cries of ecstasy as they pounded your sopping pussy, threatening to make the bed punch holes in the wall behind the headboard, leaving the frame groaning in protest under the songs of your wails. Your ears rang as the world around you vanished, leaving just you with your game of Guess Who: Kakashi Edition. You had all but thrown that idea out the window as you were now convinced that there had been two of him all along and this was just an elaborate setup. Teeth gnashing, you tangled your fingers into tufts of thick, silver hair as your body shuddered in time with their thrusts. A heat unlike you had ever felt before mounted rapidly in your core, leaving your jaw trembling and toes curling as a raspy hellcry readied itself in your chest. Your walls clenched almost painfully around the pair of cocks fucking the sense out of you. Your clit throbbed. Your thighs ached. That boiling heat built until you unleashed a banshee wail that had to be stifled by one of the four hands climbing your body to spare the neighborhood of the details. You creamed on their cocks, soaking them in your essence as your eyes rolled back into your head, as if your soul just left your body.

"Fuck--" they growled in unison, their grips on your sweat-soaked body tightening as your wrecked little pussy pulsed around them in intense waves. One stifled the chaotic sounds of your release, pressing your face into the neck of his counterpart.

Overstimulated and gasping for air, your hips bucked between them, almost unable to handle the onslaught of pleasure tearing you apart. Your face tingled as every muscle in your body contracted in sync with their motion, leaving you breathless and teetering on the edge of passing out. The sounds of their groaning and hissing your name in stereo filled your head. Lips and teeth grazed your neck as the frenzied pace quickened. You were deaf to the sounds of your own screaming as you flew off into space with them. Two final, wild thrusts tossed your body about like you were nothing but a doll. The moaning cry of overwhelming pleasure that escaped your throat came in unison with the intense heat that filled you as they delved into you to a seemingly impossible depth and painted your insides white.

Time slowed as you struggled to make sense of what your name even was as they rolled to the side with you, murmuring soft hums of praise as they slid carefully from your spent pussy and their collective essence seeped from you. Arms encircled you from both sides, pressing your incredible fatigued body between theirs in a mirrored tangle of limbs as you fought to catch your breath. The panting devolved into little bouts of giggling as you nestled yourself firmly into the delightful embrace of your Kakashi sandwich.

"Well?" They hummed in unison, smirking at you while brushing sweaty hair from your face and rubbing soothing lines up your arms.

"I have noooo idea," you giggled in tired defeat, rolling back slightly to gaze between their mirrored, amused expressions.

A voice from the door cut through the sounds of your panting and giggling gasps of fatigue. "Hi, kitten."

You squeaked in surprise, sitting up abruptly from in between the pair lounging smugly on either side of you. "B-babe?"

With a sly smirk, he unfolded his arms and strode into the room. "So, you started without me, I see."

Your eyes widened and your voice rapidly climbed into a shrill new register. "S-started?" You stammered, eyes rapidly darting between the three of them.

Chuckling in that soft, cool tone, his eyes locked onto yours as he casually unbuttoned his shirt and walked toward you. "That is what I said. You still haven't figured out which of us is the real one, am I correct?"

With wide eyes and another squeaky whine, you swallowed hard and bit your lip in excitement.

You were in for a long night.

[frostedfaves]

Naive (3)

Masterlist

Pairing: demon!Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader

Summary: You pick up on the lies in Wanda’s life and she decides to show you the truth.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, dark!fic, demon things™️, more hints at dom/sub because I’m a whore for demon!Wanda

A/N: I can’t believe that it’s been a month since I posted the last one 😭 I have some things planned for the next part and so on but I also kinda wanna take requests again??? idk we all know how I get overwhelmed easily with that so we’ll see what happens there. anyway tell me your thoughts on this please!

Previous part

Waking up feels like gasping for air after being trapped underwater. You aren’t sure how long you were asleep, but the mid afternoon traffic quickly alerts you of how much of the day has passed. 

Despite your head feeling like it’s made of cement, you manage to stand up, slipping off thin pajamas as you walk into the bathroom and stop at the mirror. Your skin seems tender in places and you’re a little bit startled when there isn’t a single indication of the bite marks and scratches you feel, even after rubbing your eyes a few times and turning in every direction possible. Deciding to let it go for now, you reach for the shower stall to turn on the water, detouring to the bedroom instead when you hear your phone ringing.

“Hello?”

“You didn’t save my number, did you?”

“Wanda?” You pull the phone away long enough to quickly clear your throat. “I mean hey, Wanda! What makes you think I didn’t save your number?”

“You answered like you didn’t know who was going to be on the other end.”

“Okay, you caught me,” you admit after a moment of silence. “I promise I’ll save it as soon as we hang up. Anyway, what’s up?”

“Remember that pet adoption center you pointed out to me?” You acknowledge her with a hum. “I was thinking about getting a cat…Wanna tag along?”

“Absolutely! I was just about to shower though so I can be ready in an hour or so.”

“Perfect! I’ll text you when I’m outside.”

The two of you say your goodbyes and you keep your promise of saving her number, typing in her name and hesitating on the emoji keyboard. Realizing you’d spent far too much time contemplating this, you simply save what you have and hurry back to the bathroom, something in your brain urging you to not keep her waiting.

-

Within an hour, she sends you a text in all caps and a smiley face that tells you she’s arrived, and you can’t hide the fact that you’re surprised when you come outside and she’s waiting on the passenger side of the car.

“Hey! How are you?” she greets cheerily as she approaches you with a hug, and you shiver when her hand touches your lower back. “Are you cold?”

“No, I’m okay.” You smile and thank her when she opens the door for you, attempting to collect yourself as she crosses to the driver’s side again. “I’m really happy to see you again.”

“You are?”

“Yeah,” you admit quietly as she pulls away from the curb. “Is that such a bad thing?”

“No no, I just didn’t want to assume you were enjoying our time together as much as I was.”

She places her hand over yours while she glances at you, smiling as she squeezes your fingers and thigh lightly. You feel a rush of something traveling from the places she touched to your brain, only slightly aware of the fog settling in your mind.

“Well I didn’t want to be too enthusiastic about it and scare you away if all you wanted was friendship,” you clarify, meeting her eyes when she reaches a red light.

“I suppose you’re looking for more too, then.”

“I am now.”

The light turns green and she breaks eye contact, but the little smirk that follows tells you everything you need to know. At least, you hope it does.

-

“I think he’s the cutest one we’ve seen yet,” you comment about the kitten that hasn’t looked away from Wanda since you approached his area. “He seems really drawn to you, too.”

“How did he get the name ‘Baby Satan’?” Wanda inquires with an employee, who approaches you with a chuckle.

“It’s actually Baby Stan, because we used to have an adult cat named Stan as well and needed to tell the two apart. We were going to give him a new name but decided to leave that up to his new family.”

“It says ‘Baby Satan’ though,” you cosign with Wanda, gesturing to the extra A mixed in with the magnetic letters that spell the kitten’s name.

“Oh, I’m so sorry! I don’t know how that got there,” the employee apologizes as she reaches over to fix the sign, and you watch her freeze as Wanda touches her arm.

“Don’t be sorry. Keep it; I want to adopt him.”

“Okay, right this way,” the employee mumbles as she turns awkwardly and stumbles over to a desk, and as the two of you follow her, you look back to see Baby Satan still staring at the woman beside you.

“What was that about?” you speak up finally once you’re in the car with her new furry friend, and Wanda frowns at you while fastening her seatbelt.

“What?”

“Why did that employee react to you like that? You touched her and she started acting really weird after.”

“Oh, Kim’s fine!” she assures you as she fixes her mirror before pulling out of the parking lot. “I actually asked her about that while you were looking at scratching posts and she said I’d overstepped her boundaries and made her uncomfortable. Don’t worry, I apologized and everything’s good again.”

“She told you her name?”

“She was wearing a name tag, babe.”

Babe...that’s new. Still, the sudden nickname doesn’t completely distract you from the fact that you’re certain there was no name tag on Kim’s uniform. You’re debating with yourself about bringing this up when you notice her heading toward Lane County.

“Are you taking me to your house?”

“Yeah, if you don’t mind.” She glances at you and over her shoulder toward Baby Satan before turning back to the road. “I figured I could introduce both of my kittens to the place they’ll be spending a lot of time in.”

Her fingers brush over your knee as “my kittens” leaves her lips, and you’re almost embarrassed when your hips involuntarily buck slightly. Noticing the small change in your behavior, she takes advantage of your head turned toward your own window and allows her instincts to continue driving while she stares at you, placing her palm on your thigh and rubbing circles on the fabric covering it that brings her closer and closer to your core.

“Home, sweet home,” Wanda announces as she pulls her wandering hand away to park the car, jumping out a second later and grabbing her furry son from the backseat. “Hey there, Baby S.”

You step out of the car in a similar fashion of pulling yourself out of a swimming pool, taking in the fresh air and trying to relax yourself as you follow her into the apartment building. The hallways reflect the quiet and clean neighborhood as you make your way into the elevator and up to the 6th floor, suddenly entering the most empty apartment you’ve ever seen.

Of course there’s furniture: a couch with a TV mounted on the nearest wall, a dining table with a set of matching chairs, a few stools placed at the island and kitchen appliances that are shiny and new. But there isn’t any personal artwork, posters, books or even just a lamp that you could tell Wanda purchased herself with one glance.

“Are you staying in an AirBNB or something?” you ask as she carefully places Baby Satan’s carrier next to the couch, and she chuckles.

“I guess technically it was one before I moved in, but I’ve been here for two years.”

“Okay...so where are your pictures?”

“What?”

“Where are your pictures?” you repeat, maintaining a steady voice despite the expression she gives you as she faces you again. “Pictures of your family, friends, you as a child?”

“If you knew my family, you’d understand why you don’t see them here.” She startles you by practically growling her words but you press further.

“Okay but you also said you love plants and we’re the only living things in here.” You step back to put more space between you while quiet shuffling noises are heard inside the carrier. “What’s really going on here?”

You can easily spot the shift in Wanda’s emotions: going from defensive, arms crossed and eyes glaring to resigned with slightly sagging shoulders and a defeated sigh.

“Fine, you got me.” She bends over to pick up the carrier again and passes you on her way to the door, stopping a few feet away. “If you’re serious about pursuing a relationship with me, then I should probably show you my real home.”

“I don’t know...”

“Come on, love.” She comes just close enough to bring your hand into hers and a tingle spreads through your body, causing you to pull away but her grip only tightens. “I promise I’m not going to hurt you, and this is the only time I’ve lied.”

You find yourself being drawn closer to her, and an almost familiar feeling washes over you when her thumb begins rubbing gentle circles into your jaw. The metal on her ring is so cold it almost burns upon contact, yet you nuzzle into her more with each pass along your skin.

“Don’t you want to be good for me without being forced to your knees first?”

If the fog surrounding your consciousness wasn’t so thick, you might’ve been shocked by this side of her, so calm yet demanding you serve her. But the hand on your jaw seemed to cover every inch of your body and sink into your nervous system, forcing you to fall into her and let her lead you back to the car with a simple arm around your waist. You’re buckled into the passenger seat again and a slightly blurry grin greets you from behind the wheel seconds later.

“I can’t wait to make you mine.”

Your head falls against the car window as she drives to the edge of Lane County, and your altered vision picks up on businesses turning into isolated suburbs into grassy fields into forests. You travel along narrow, winding roads past the tallest of trees with very few spaces in between, and your hazy state of mind prevents you from panicking when Wanda turns onto a dirt path that doesn’t even seem to be safe for bicycles. The wheels bump along the forest floor until she comes to a stop just outside of a two foot dwelling, similar to a cave.

Once the two of you are out of the car again, she holds your hand with her free one until you reach the cave, instructing you to sit in front of it while she does the same. She places her palm on the door, and her rings seem to come alive as they interact with it for a few moments before it swings open and the three of you are sent flying through a tunnel. You land with a groan on the hard floor and dust yourself off as you carefully stand, any questions dying in your throat as you face Wanda again, now standing before you in her true form.

“Welcome home.”

[sillyrabbit81]

Soooooo, Sy proposed an got denied? WTF??? Would you possibly indulge us in how that happened? Cause I cannot seem to wrap my head about it and it might make an amazing tale???

So first off, HAPPY BIRTHDAY for yesterday! I had hoped to have this done for you yesterday but I couldn’t make it work. Hopefully it’s worth the days delay and you enjoy it.

Summary: Sy asks you to marry him, but you say no. A lot.

Pairing: Captain Syverson x Female Reader

Word Count: approx. 1.8k

Warnings: Smut, fluff and angst, mentions of body fluids, p in v sex, oral sex (f receiving), fingering (f receiving), angry sex, incorrect use of prescription medication, accidental high.

Authors note: as always @amberangel112 thank you for beta reading. I blame you if something goes wrong :P

EDIT: Fogot to say this is a prequel of sorts to In the Bar

Masterlist

Part 2

Before the Bar

You and Sy had been dating for two months the first time he proposed. You didn’t even realise it was a real proposal. You were at his house, and you suddenly felt sick. Your hands went clammy, you started to sweat, and you felt saliva pool in your mouth. He knew immediately something was wrong.

You croaked out, “I think I’m going to be sick.” And you were, all over his blanket and favourite Led Zeppelin t-shirt. He didn’t move, he sat there and rubbed your back, making soothing noises until you stopped being sick. Then he sprang into action, carefully lifting the blankets off you, and taking them to his laundry. He came back shirtless and helped you up and took you to his bathroom. He carefully undressed you out of your dirty clothes and brought you a pair of his sweatpants, a t-shirt and helped you get dressed.

“You think you got anymore in there?” Sy asked. You shrugged, shivering and he said, “Wait here, I’ll be right back.” He wasn’t gone long and came back with a bucket. He brought you back out to the sofa, wrapped you in the blanket from his bed and went to clean up.

You felt terrible. “I’m so sorry Sy,” you said through chattering teeth, your guts churning inside you.

“Don’t be Darlin’,” he said. Sy kneeled in front of you and grabbed your hands. “It’s good practice for when we get married and have kids.” He grinned at you, giving you one of his awkward winks.

You let out a small giggle, and immediately regretted it, your stomach spasmed in pain. “Don’t make me laugh, Sy.”

Sy reached up to touch your cheek and he said, “I ain’t kiddin’, li’l girl. I’m gonna marry you.”

Still thinking he’s joking, you said, “Do I get a say in it at all?”

“I suppose you could say no, but I’m gonna keep askin’ until you say yes.” He raised his eyebrows at you. “So, save yourself the hassle and just say yes now.”

“You’re serious?” You swallowed, feeling the bile rise in your stomach again.

He nodded. “I couldn’t be more serious.”

“It’s been two months,” you said. “You couldn’t possibly know you want to marry me.”

“I knew the moment I met you and today confirmed it,” he said firmly. He certainly looked sincere, but you didn’t think it made any sense.

“How could me throwing up on you confirm it?”

“Cause I still think you’re the cutest li’l kitten in the world and all I want is to take care of you.” You rolled your eyes at him, but he persisted. “So how about it?”

You shook your head, “No. I am not telling people you proposed to me while I had my head in a bucket and blowing chunks.”

Sy chuckled. “Fair point,” he said. “Next time I’ll make it romantic.”

He didn’t though, the next time he proposed it was during sex. You had been dating for about four months by this time. Sy was between your legs working you towards your second orgasm when he lifted his head, and said, “Li’l girl you’ve got the best fucking pussy in the world.”

“Don’t stop, please…” You whimpered.

Sy curled his fingers deep inside you, finding that spot that makes you squirm. “Your pussy’s all mine, ain’t it?”

“Fuck, yes, Sy!” You’re were so close. You could feel your body tensing, each muscle coiled tight, searching for the release you crave.

“Marry me so everyone knows it,” Sy demands before putting his mouth back on your clit, sucking and licking you, pushing you to the brink.

“Fuck,” you said furious, now he asks you? “You… asshole!” You can’t stop, his mouth felt so good, “Oh Fuck, please?” You pleaded.

“Marry me?” He growled into you, his breath was hot against you before he started to blow gently against your clit, the hot and cold sensations doing you in.

“No…” you said, trying to form a sentence. “Fuck you! You said… fuck… romantic…” And you fell apart, shattering as played your body like a fiddle.

He didn’t let you recover, bringing his body above yours he kissed you as he lined himself up against your core. You bit down on his lip. He growled and entered you with powerful thrust. “I’m tryin’ to be romantic, but your filthy mouth just won’t fucking let me,” he grunted as he drives into you.

Full of bliss from your orgasm his rapid fucking kept you in a state of euphoria. Trying to recover your senses you said, “Fucking isn’t romance.”

Sy snarls into your neck, sucking hard enough to leave you with a hickey. “Fine,” he said. He gabbed your jaw and made you look at him. Although he was rough and animalistic as he fucked you, you saw amusement in his eyes. “You know I ain’t gonna give up, Darlin’.”

“I don’t want you to,” you said.

He kissed you again, groaning into your mouth, his lips sweet as he whispered, “I love you.”

The third time was a little after six months of dating and he got news he was to be deployed in a month. Sy came straight to your house with the news and got on one knee, a black velvet box in his hand.

“Please Darlin’, I gotta know you’re gonna be here when I come back. I gotta know you’re my girl.”

You really thought about it this time, you could see the sincerity on his face, the angst, the fear. You kneeled with him. You almost said yes. A large part of you wanted to, but you were practical and honest with yourself. You had never had a successful long distance relationship, you knew how hard they were and you had dreaded this day as soon as you found out he was on active duty and could be called away at any moment.

You cried as you told Sy your fears and why you have to say no. You saw his jaw jut forward, he didn’t look at you, you knew he couldn’t, you could see how close to tears he actually was and it took your breath away. For the first time you truly realised he does love you, he does want this, it’s not the game you had been thinking it was. “Sy, if we stay together through this, then I know we can get through anything.”

When he finally looked at you, he held the sides of your head in his hands, the ache is so real in his eyes, you sob as you tell him you’re sorry.

“You’re breakin’ my heart, Darlin’,” he said, his voice hoarse with devastation. He pressed his lips against yours, while his hands tore at your clothes in anger, pain, and fear. He fucked you, harder than he ever had before, taking his frustrations out on your core, claiming you, begging you to tell him you love him, forcing you to tell him you’re his. You do, it’s no lie, and you were as rough as he was, clawing at him, biting him, pushing him away one moment pulling him closer the next. You were so hurt that he was going to leave you.

The fourth time, you had to admit he tried. It was a month after he returned from deployment, and he took you away for the weekend. It may have actually worked if he didn’t tear his hamstring working out a few days before. He didn’t want to ruin the weekend, so he didn’t tell you badly he injured himself and the car ride was so painful when you got to the hotel, he pumped himself so full of painkillers he made himself high.

You were worried about him, thinking he was having some sort of mental breakdown as he giggled like a schoolgirl all through dinner. He picked up the crab you were eating and pretended they were having a conversation. You had never seen anything like it, yeah Sy could be playful, but this… this way not normal.

“Hey, hey, li’l girl, listen, Mr Claws here is trying to tell you something.” He held his crab shell to his ear, his words slurred as he said, “What’s that, Mr. Claws? She’s real pretty? Keep your claws to yourself, she’s mine.”

“Sy, you’ve lost it.”

“No Darlin’. It’s just the drugs talking,” he admitted nonchalantly.

“The drugs?” you asked incredulous. “You don’t take drugs.”

“Pffft, they’re just painkillers, I’m fine.” He licked his lips, “And so are you.”

You closed your eyes, shaking your head. Ok, so it was funny, but also disturbing. You worried about him possibly OD-ing and realise that he had drunk some wine with dinner. No wonder he was so fucked up!

Sy reached across the table and grabbed your hand. You gasped and swore as you felt him trying to put a ring on your finger. “See, romantic this time, Darlin’.” Even through his completely drug addled brain you could see the sincerity in his sleepy eyes. “Marry me?”

With real regret you shake your head. “If I thought you’d remember this in the morning I would say yes but let’s not do it like this.”

Surprisingly, he seemed to sober up. “I give up, Darlin’,” he said, the pain of you rejection clear on his face. “I ain’t gonna ask you again. You know what I want. You tell me when you’re ready.”

Sy got up and went to bed. You stayed up a while to give him space before tentatively joining him. He kept his back to you, he was still except for the slow movements of his chest. You could tell he isn’t asleep though, which surprised you considering how inebriated he appeared earlier.

You couldn’t take it, knowing you had hurt him again. You moved behind him and holding your breath you wrapped your arm around him, pressing your chest into his back. He sighed before he took your hand in his, and you exhaled. You gave him a kiss on his shoulder and said softly, “I love you, Sy.”

Lifting your hand to his mouth he kissed your fingertips. “I know, Darlin’.” Neither of you said anything more and eventually you both fell asleep.

True to his word, he didn’t ask you again. Never even brought it up. You thought about it when you moved in together a few months later but decided not to. It wasn’t until that night at the bar when you realised how stupid you had been that you finally said yes.

Tag List 1

@henryobsessed @omgkatinka @legendarywizarddetective @posiemax @nostalgicb-txh @moonlacebeam @anitababi @agniavateira @blakerogue @shadesofarrogance @mansaaay @stxlemate @wheretheriversrunintothesea @amberangel112 @madbaddic7ed @eldarwen333 @wolvesandhoundshowltogether @summersong69 @littlefreya @littlebirdofrivia @luclittlepond @myloveforhenrycavill @mary-ann84 @tellingyouastory @beck07990 @zealoushound @sofiebstar @sweetlybigdragonn @bloodyinspiredfuck @marantha @diegos-butt @greensleeves888 @endofalldays01 @justaboringadult @ysmmsy @offroadinjandals @littlewrenofrivia @pussyverson @foxyjwls007 @kebabgirl67

[belphies-cuhm-sluht]

hii,can I request the brothers (or juts Mammon & Satan) with a chubby MC who is very self aware of her weight so she gets extremely nervous when they hug her or touch a part of her body that she doesn't specifically likes?

If you can make this,thank you so much♥

Brothers With A Chubby GN!MC (Headcanons)

Lucifer

It had been a long day for him, meeting with Lord Diavolo always tired him out and coming home to you was always the highlight of his day. As soon as he saw you it was like a massive weight lifted off his shoulders, a fresh breath of relief.

His arms wrapped around you from behind as you stood at the bathroom sink, just having finished your nightly routine so you could climb into bed. He felt you slightly stiffen at his touch, a reaction that you always had whenever he hugged you, a reaction that he didn’t quite understand. His eyes watched your own in the mirror, following them down to where his hands laid on your body. You didn’t have to say anything for him to understand now, although he didn’t understand why it would make you react the way you did. He never understood the human realms standards for beauty or attractiveness.

He kissed along your neck, loosening his arms to glide his hands along your body, his eyes focusing on your face in the mirror. “You’re absolutely perfect, darling. I don’t want you to forget that. I adore everything about you.”

Mammon

He often did sneaky hugs, running up behind you and shaking his arms around you. He always held onto you so long, resting his chin on your shoulder and swaying side to side, just genuinely enjoying being able to hold you.

He was also absolutely oblivious to how nervous it made you, how self conscious you felt when he had you that close to him. This time was just a little worse though, his hands roaming a little more than they usually did, and you grabbed his hands, quickly pulling them off of you as you stepped away from him, laughing nervously.

“What’sa matter? Ya don’t wanna hug from The Great Mammon?” He noticed you covering yourself, wrapping your arms around your stomach, trying to hide yourself. “Oi, why’re ya hiding’ yerself from me?”

You’ll have to explain to him a couple times because honestly, he just doesn’t get it. You’re clearly the most beautiful person he’s ever laid his eyes on, and he doesn’t understand why you can’t see that as well.

“There ain’t nuthin wrong with ya! Yer hot…” Now he’s a little nervous because he’s not used to being that forward with you, but he’s doing his best and he doesn’t want you to feel bad about yourself ever, so if he has to keep awkwardly telling you how attractive you are to him, he’s gonna do it. “Yer my human, I been chasin after ya since ya got down here… Ain’t nuthin gonna change that.”

Leviathan

You always sat between his legs while he was gaming, his arms wrapped loosely around you or resting on your lap as he held the controller. He would feel you nervously shuffle, trying to make it so that his hands never actually touched you, but he just assumed that you needed to stretch out or that maybe that your legs fell asleep. It was to be expected, especially since he usually games in five hour sessions.

After a while, he started to realize though that you only ever did the little shuffle when his hands were laid on your thighs, or if his arms were wrapped a little too snuggly around you. It made him self conscious, and while he didn’t want you to think it bothered him, even though it did, he wanted to know what was wrong.

“D-Do you not want me to touch you?” It was inevitable that he’d catch on at some point, but you hadn’t planned what you were going to say once he did. It felt weird to talk about these things, especially with the guy that you loved. You didn’t want him to look at you differently, it was embarrassing.

You finally got the courage to tell him how you felt and what the real problem was. He actually looked hurt that you felt that way about yourself. He tossed his controller to the side, holding you tightly against him as he buried his face in your neck. “Please don’t feel that way… y-you’re so cute… I-I like holding you like this… I like you… n-no matter what…”

Satan

He was intuitive, he could read you like a book. That was both a pro and a con of dating him, you could never keep things a surprise or a secret from him, he just knew too much.

He walked into your room, standing just out of sight as you looked over yourself in the mirror. He knew exactly what you were doing, running your hands over your body, your lips turned down into a pout as you did. He hated seeing you judge yourself, and he knew that in your mind you were picking yourself apart, mentally pointing out what you believed to be flaws, but all he saw was a gorgeous human, his gorgeous human.

“Look how beautiful you are…” He murmured from the doorway, finally catching your attention. You quickly turned around, but he was already there, standing in front of you. His smile was soft, sweet and adoring as he looked you over. “My beautiful kitten. Look at you…” He turned you around, facing you towards the mirror as he traced his fingers lightly over your body.

“You know, some people think even the most beautiful things aren’t that… but it shouldn’t matter what other people think. What you think is the most important… and as long as you don’t see the beauty in yourself, you’ll never be happy… but…” He turned you back around, tilting your head up with his finger under your chin, leaning in closer and pressing a quick kiss to your lips. “If you need help finding your beauty, I’ll gladly show you, every single day… because I see it everywhere with you.”

Asmodeus

Shopping was something that you did often with Asmo, it was a weekly routine and something you both looked forward to once Saturday rolled around. This time was different though, and you were feeling… down about yourself lately. The good thing about Asmo was that he was usually so focused on himself that he didn’t really notice that change in your demeanor, not until you got to the store at least.

“Oh! Look at this! It’ll look lovely on you! Try it on for me, I want to see you in it!” He was always like this. He wasn’t just your boyfriend, he was also your personal stylist, picking clothes, shoes, and accessories that he knew would be great on you. Usually the clothes he picked made you feel sexy, hot, attractive, but as you looked at the outfit he picked out for you it almost made you cringe. It was tightly fitting, that much you could see just from him holding it up. You hadn’t even put it on yet and you were already embarrassed. “What’s wrong, love? Don’t worry, no one else will see you in it. I’ll go into the dressing room with you!” That just made you feel worse, your eyes widening at his suggestion as you quickly shook your head.

The dressing room was filled with mirrors on each side, you couldn’t escape your reflection even if you wanted to. You didn’t want to look at yourself, it just made you feel more self conscious, you hated it. There was nothing wrong with the outfit, nothing at all, the main problem, at least to you, is that you were in it. “Is everything alright in there?” His voice came from right outside the door and you wanted to crawl under a rock and hide there, but you couldn’t, and Asmo was going to come in soon if you weren’t coming out, so you might as well show him.

“Ahhh! Look at you! Perfection!” He squealed as you stepped out, rushing over to you and wrapping his arms around you. “How did I get so lucky to find someone just as beautiful as I am?” He had felt you stiffen in his arms, and he took a step back, his face contorted with worry. “Did I hurt you?” You shook your head no, your voice barely a whisper as you told him what was wrong and he almost looked insulted when you told him. “I don’t think that at all… Don’t say that about yourself. You’re the most stunning human I’ve ever laid my eyes on! I’m not going to let you think any differently, so I’ll just tell you everyday starting now. Also, you look amazing in that outfit, and I’m definitely buying it for you for our date tonight!”

Beelzebub

He came home from the gym, sweat dripping from everywhere as he walked through the door. You were standing at the kitchen counter, making him something to eat, knowing he’d be more hungry than usual. It was always like that after he worked out, and you made sure to have something prepared for him when he’d come home so he didn’t have to raid the fridge.

“You’re the best, honey. Thank you.” He came into the kitchen, wrapping one arm around your waist as he stood to your side, leaning in to kiss the top of your head. You tensed up a little, and he quickly pulled his arm away, smiling sheepishly down at you. “Sorry… I know I’m all sweaty. I’ll go shower first.” Now you felt bad for making him think that it was his fault that you seemed disgusted. It wasn’t with him, it was with yourself, but you knew he wouldn’t understand if you told him. To Beel, you were as beautiful as an angel, and he didn’t even understand how he got lucky enough to have you. If he knew that you felt bad about yourself, it would upset him, and he’d immediately blame himself, somehow finding a reason that your feelings were his fault. He was already sprinting up the stairs to take a shower, giving you time to think of how to tell him how you felt without making him assume that he was somehow the cause for those feelings.

When he came back down the stairs he had a wide smile on his face, bounding over to you and pulling you into the tightest bear hug, picking you up and spinning you around, but he immediately noticed that you tensed up again. “I took a shower… Do I still stink?” He took a step back, and you quickly shook your head, taking a deep breath before telling him what was really wrong. His mouth fell open as he looked at you, really looked at you. “What do you mean? I don’t see anything wrong with you…” He was practically studying you, trying to find the “flaws” that you thought you had, but he legitimately couldn’t find any. In Beels eyes, you were flawless, and you couldn’t change his mind. “I love you no matter what. I love who you are, inside and out, everything about you.” He shrugged as if it was a simple thing, and to him it was. Loving you was as simple as taking a bite out of the sandwich you had made him. “There must be something wrong with the mirrors making you think that… Maybe I can be your mirror… I’ll tell you how wonderful you look! That’s a good idea, I’ll do that.”

Belphegor

Nighttime was his favorite time with you. He had you all to himself, his brothers weren’t constantly trying to get your attention, it was just you and him. It was perfect. He got to hold you close against him, just how he liked it. Tonight was no different, besides the fact that you didn’t want to be held by him, you didn’t want his arms around you, and you couldn’t seem to get far enough to the edge of the bed. It wasn’t anything against him, nothing at all, it was all you.

“Are you hot or something?” He asked from beside you, he sounded confused, which was reasonable. You were still wrapped in blankets, and honestly, you were freezing. It would be nice to have him hold you, he was always so warm, but you didn’t want him to touch you, you were feeling so self conscious, it was awful. You hummed in agreement, not expecting him to reach over and pull the blankets off of you himself before scooting closer and wrapping his arm around you anyway. “There, now you won’t get overheated.” He nestled into the crook of your neck and you could feel him smiling, but you were stiff as a board. “Are you alright?” He pulled back just enough to try to look at you even though it was dark.

You weren’t alright, but you didn’t even know how you’d tell him what the real problem was. There was no simple way to openly tell the person that you love all of your flaws, it was humiliating. There was the chance that once you brought them up, he wouldn’t be able to look at you the same, and you didn’t want to lose him because of that. “Hey. You’re not alright, you’re being too quiet… and you’re not even hot. You feel cold… What’s wrong?” You didn’t want to lie to him, and you didn’t want him to assume anything either.

You rolled over, pulling the blankets back up again to cover yourself before explaining everything to him. He was quiet for a bit before rolling you back over and wrapping his arm around you. “You’re funny…” He sighed, nuzzling back into your neck and kissing along it. “You really think I care about that kind of stuff? I don’t care about looks, and even if I did… You’re flawless.” He pushed himself up just enough to kiss your cheek before laying back down, sighing softly. “I love you… Now get some sleep.”

[harrypotter-imaginess]

A/N: I loved doing this one guys, and I hope you love it too. Might do a part 2 not sure yet, as always commissions are still open until 3/10 message if your interested- price list is here

- Okay this is the ship guys this is it-

- This is like Hades and Persephone type of love

- Everyone thinks that Regulus is someone to be feared because of his family, and everyone knows they dabble in the dark arts

- And everyone is so caught up in his family-

- In the estate, and those dark rumors, and their dark magic-

- That no one see’s Regulus is just a boy-

- A lonely boy with no real friends, not really

- It’s worse now that Sirius has been disowned

- He’s got people around him, boys who’s parents are aquatinted with his

- But they don’t really like him

- They just hang around because they want a flicker of his power

- Of that ancient dark magic everyone’s convinced he’s got

- Everyone except you that is

- You’re this beautiful, cheerful, precious thing

- He meets you when you’re lost, looking for the bathroom

- “Sorry to bother, but do you know if it’s down the hall?” You ask, he’s seen you a few times; in class, or around the corridors

- Playing gobstones with your ever growing group of friends

- He would be jealous if he wasn’t so surprised that you’re speaking to him at all, aren’t you a muggle born?

- Shouldn’t you be afraid of him?

- Just like everyone else?

- “It’s in the next hallway, that one is moaning Myrtle’s bathroom” he says quietly

- He watches you nod enthusiastically

- Looks like you’ll be on your way now, probably for the best, he wouldn’t want his parents to know -

- “Would you mind showing me?” You ask

- And it’s awfully pushy, but somehow Regulus can’t turn down that bright smile of yours

- You talk to him so easily, like you’re not afraid of him at all

- And it irritates him a little.

- Honestly, even the professors are a little afraid of him

- Everyone is

- So why aren’t you

- “Do you-“ he stops in the middle of the corridor, and you walk a few steps forward before realizing he’s not beside you anymore

- “Do you know who I am?”

- You must not, that’s the only explanation

- When you find out you’ll go as pale as the moon, and afterward you will regale the tale for your many friends, how you barley escaped the fearsome Regulus Black, right before he was about to curse you with his dark magic.

- But you only offer a quizzical expression and a smile

- “You’re Regulus Black”

- You say it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world

- It only makes him upset, but he doesn’t know why

- In fact since the moment he met you there’s been this burning irritation lingering in the back of his mind, and he just can’t seem to pin point why

- But regardless of the reason, it seems to be boiling over right now, in an empty corridor in the middle of the night

- “Shouldn’t you be afraid? I could curse you right here if I wanted”

- But the smile on your face remains

- “Maybe, but you won’t” you muse

- He laughs

- “Why because you think I’m afraid getting expelled?”

- Honestly his parents would welcome him with a feast if he came home for attacking a muggle born

- It would be a sign he wasn’t going to become like Sirius after all

- Because that’s the worst thing a person could be according to his parents-

- A blood traitor

- But instead of quaking in your shoes you flash him a quizzical smile

- “Nah, I just don’t think you’re that kind of person” you shrug

- The words echo in his mind long after you’ve said them

- And though he’s looked at you before

- He’s only really looking at you now, the easy way your lips curl into a smile, the sparkle in your eye, the glow around you-

- Like you’re made of sunlight

- Like you breathe life into all things wherever you go

- Like an ancient witch he heard of , heralded as the goddess of spring

- Like Persephone

- Ah, so that’s it

- It’s not that he hates you

- It’s that he envies you

- Because seeing how natural it is to see you do good, makes him hope -  it makes him yearn to be like that too

- To be more than an heir to his family’s dark legacy

- “I could be wrong though” you shrug, you can count on one hand how many times you’ve been right about something

- But still, you just don’t buy that the shy kid in front of you is some evil prodigy bent on destroying the world

- “No” Regulus’s voice cracks, and it’s soft, so soft you almost don’t hear it.

- But your turn to him, eyes jumping from one of the many paintings in the corridor to his pale face

- His eyes seem glossy as they look into yours, and it’s not just because of the light from the torches

- “No, I’m not that kind of person” he says with a bit more strength this time, and you grin

- And while you feel that there’s something important about the moment, you don’t realize the monumental significance this chance meeting holds for Regulus

- “Oh, we passed the washroom” he realizes after a moment, he was so caught up in talking to you he hadn’t realized

- “Ah, that’s okay I didn’t have to use the bathroom anyway” you say with a wave of your hand

- Huh?

- Noticing his expression you get a sheepish look on your face

- “Well I’ve wanted to talk to you for a while, but you’re always with people-“

- Yeah he’s sure his “friends” would give off an especially murderous aura if you ever tried to approach them

- “So when I saw an opportunity, I just took it” you admit with a slight laugh

- “I wanted to see what everyone was talking about when they mentioned the ‘Dark Prince’ “ there’s a teasing flint in your eye, and the nickname alone is enough to make him flush red

- “And what’s your assessment?” he manages to ask, a smile stretching across his face

- “Very underwhelming, I came expecting several hexes and a duel, and all I got was a cute boy with pretty eyes”

- This time he really does flush bright red, eyes trained on his shoes

- You laugh, you were mostly teasing

- But he is quite cute isn’t he?

- What’s everyone so scared of anyway? He’s like a shy kitten

- He watches you walk to a particular portrait, whispering a word before it swings open

- “Well see ya around Mr. Dark Prince” you say, sending a teasing wink his way

- Regulus is glowing red, even when he’s tucked in bed, in his common room hours after the meeting. the mere memory of the words you said send his heart racing again

- “They said I’m cute” he’ll recall with a goofy smile spreading across his face

- After that, things are brighter for Regulus

- You pull him into your group of friends, quite literally

- “I-I don’t think this is a good idea” he manages, catching the terrified glances of passerby’s as you tug him forward by his arm 

- What a sight you must be, the literal personification of spring pulling the Dark Prince  himself by the arm through the castle

- The aforementioned Dark Prince having a rosy tinge on his cheeks, which most of the other students misplace for Fury instead of what it actually is:

- Embarrassment with a healthy dash of attraction to aforementioned personification of spring

- “Nonsense, everyone’s dying to meet you Reg”

- When you use his nickname his flush darkens

- No ones ever called him that-

- No one except Sirius and Andromeda

- He likes the way it sounds coming from you

- And you’re right, your friends accept him into their fold immediately

- “You know any curses?” One of your friends asks, it’s in a jovial manner that anyone could tell they’re just teasing but Regulus flinches

- “No, not really” he admits, not any he’s good at anyway

- He did see his parents do something akin to a sacrifice when he was younger with an alter in the full moon, but he really wouldn’t know where to start with that

- “What about gobstones, you know the rules to that?”

- Regulus nods

- “Well lets play then!”

- Before he knows it, it’s like this was always his life

- Laughing with you in class, games of gobstones with your friends and trips to Hogsmeade on the weekend

- Regulus didn’t know that he was yearning for this

- How often had he wished for something like this,

- A place that feels like it’s full of sunshine, where everyone feels accepted, and no one has to feel sad

- This is the happiest Regulus has ever been

- But all dreams must come to an end

- The end of the semester comes around, and he has to go home for Christmas vacation

- You’re standing side by side on the train platform waiting for the train, your trunk lying next to you

- “You’re not taking anything back with you?” You ask

- Regulus shrugs

- “There’s no point, everything I need is at the manse”

- You’ve always been a bit curious about what the Black manor is like

- Probably something grand, large library’s, they probably have one of those record players with the gold horn thing

- And a ballroom

- It probably makes Hogwarts look like a pile of dirt

- But the way Regulus’ face darkens when you ask him about it tells you that- yes they probably do have a ballroom, but there’s other things too, things that are far less pleasant 

- And when he starts talking about his home life, how it’s worse - lonelier- Now that Sirius is at the Potter’s all the time, and there’s no one around to stand between him and his parents

- He notices your heartbroken expression and rushes to comfort you

- “It’s not so bad, Mum’s got her tender moments every so often and-“

- “Regulus” you cut in, and the sound of his whole name leaving your mouth makes him stutter to a stop

- “You’re supposed to feel safe and loved all the time not just sometimes”

- It’s such a basic thing, but when Regulus hears this, he feels like he’s being allowed something

- He feels, for the first time, he’s allowed to be safe and happy

- He’s allowed to be good

- “Why don’t you come home with me for Christmas? It’s probably not as grand as you’re used to-“

- You fidget awkwardly, maybe it’s silly, the prince, Regulus Black, himself sitting on your worn sofa, holding yarn while one of your family member’s knits

- You can picture it though

- You can picture a big smile across his face, indulging the younger children in your extended family in their requests for piggyback rides and for him to participate in their games

- “I want to,” he says, really the fact that you’re offering is enough, more than he could ask for

- “But I can’t”

- And it’s the truth, after Sirius, he can’t make any mistakes, his family won’t stand for it

- He especially doesn’t want to think what would happen to you if they found out he had been spending all of his time with you, a muggle born

- He doesn’t want to think what curses they might inflict you with

- He doesn’t want you to ever be hurt because of him

- “You’ll write to me?” You say it with the fervor of a demand, and it makes a smile curl onto his mouth

- “Everyday” he promises

- And things are exactly as they always were at 12 Grimmauld Place, his mother is distant, only livening up when one of the other ladies shows up for tea

- His father is squirreled away in council meetings

- His cousins are no fun, not really, and Andromeda’s not around anymore since she ran off with Ted

- He likes Ted, though he would never admit it to his family

- Ted is a lot like you, someone with an infinite amount of kindness

- He wonders how they’re doing

- He wonders how Sirius is doing

- He’s probably happy, he always looked happy when he was with his friends

- And so- with a picture of you discreetly kept on his desk, he writes three sets of letters

- The first is for you, to assure you he’s fine, and live vicariously through your spring, through your lovely Christmas moments and imagine himself there too. 

- The second for Andromeda, to ask if she’s doing alright, and to tell her he misses her

- And the last, is for Sirius

- Asking how he is, and hoping he’s well.

- And to say that he understands what Sirius was saying all those years, in their childhood and then into adolescence, Regulus understands now- 

- And he wants to be good too

[dalishthunder]

A small excerpt from chapter 8 of GEO just because I know a lot of you are hungry and to show that I am still working on it, it’s just slow going:

It felt as though your heart were caught in your throat, palms shaky as you said that one little word. Because everything be damned, you weren't going to let this chance slip by like you had all the others. Because even if this wasn't real, you wanted so, so badly to pretend. Because god dammit did you like this stupid fucking shuckboy.

Cronus let out a little laugh, "I know, I know, you're in a loving, committed relationship with the guy of your dreams, kitten. I was just playin' around. You know I don't want to overstep your bound-"

He stopped. Then blinked. Then sat stock still with a blank expression on his face, before turning to look at you.

"I said sure." You thanked whatever celestial bodies were out there (if any at all), that your voice didn't crack. In fact you even managed to sound nonchalant. Unflappable. Calm, cool, and collected.

His mouth moved wordlessly for a moment, a weird stuttery buzz followed as he exhaled.

You tentatively pressed your hand to his cheek, hoping that he wouldn't notice that it was a little sweaty because you really wanted to play this cool and not like some dumbstruck teenager talking to their crush for the first time.... Though given the way your cheeks were flushing now, and the pounding of your heart, it was probably easy as pie to see through your careful ruse.

"I'm sorry, for a second I thought you said 'sure'." He said with an unsure smile. "But I think I might just be hallucinating. Or I'm in a dream. Deeps, did I get drunk again and fall asleep on the comfort sla- couch?"

"You heard me right, and I'm really hoping I'm not just a figment of your drunk dreams because damn this would be one boring ass dream." You just had to play it cool. Just play it cool. You were cool, and suave, and definitely someone people wanted to have a romantic relationship with. Try to play up that funnyman side.

"I dunno, seems too good to be true. Where's the sike, kitten?" Cronus asked, the cigarette tapping against his jeans.

"There is none, though I suppose I do have a clarifying question." You swallowed down some of his enthusiasm at his disbelief. Maybe he really had been kidding around about it and you had just misinterpreted it. "Would this be a friend date or a romantic date?"

"Depends on what you're willin' to give me," His voice was sheepish as he replied, eyes finally meeting yours fully.

(Everything).

Everything.

"Well there, chief, I was lookin' for a cool cat to tear up the town and get a burger with. Think you can handle that, stud?" You said in the cheesiest 1950s New Jersey accent you could muster, doing your absolute best not to fall into a mess. Because if you had to say everything just plain you were pretty sure you would just spontaneously combust (or break down into a blubbering little mess).

He stared blankly at you for a minute, skin becoming progressively more violet as his fins fluttered. Then he let out a little, incredulous laugh. "Name a time and place, and I'm there, kitten."

"I'm free now." You replied quickly. Probably too quickly.

Shit.

He made a startled little rattle. "Kitten, now? Don't you think that that's a little too soon? I need time to prepare. I ain't even properly dressed to take you out!"

"How about later tonight then?"

He nodded vigorously, eyes blown wide.

"Seven thirty work for you?"

He nodded again, a crackling noise filling the air.

"It's a date then."

He blinked at you, biting his lip and nodding again.

You nodded once (ignoring your burning cheeks), "Could I see your phone?"

He nodded, pulling it out and handing it to you after unlocking it.

And you did something you should have a long time ago; or you would have if you understood the language everything was in. "Actually, can you pull up your contacts list and add me?" He did as he was told, and you entered in your number. "There's a nice restaurant not too far from my apartment that I've been wanting to try. It's an Alternian/Earth fusion place called Stratosphere that's supposed to be a little bit ritzy. I'll see about making a reservation."

His eyes were shiny and wet, and you quickly looked away, hopping up and heading over to your car. You cast one glance back at him, waving and saying, "I'll see you tonight."

As you pulled out, you caught sight of him bolting inside in your rear view mirror.

[tteokdoroki]

awake with you | s.todoroki

♡ pairing: shoto todoroki x fem!reader.

♡ word count: 1.7K

♡ rating: everyone.

♡ genre: ua student!au, angst, comfort, fluff.

♡ summary: during the night, bad things happen but your boyfriend is always there to keep them away. by your side always, shoto todorki makes it his mission to fight your demons and make sure you know that you’re loved.

♡ warning(s): please read ! character death, mentions of car accidents, nightmares, guilt, lack of sleep, but a lot of fluff and the best boyfriend in the whole world :(

♡ author’s note(s): guys! it’s shoto’s birthday, so here i am postiing this shoto request from anon a while back, i hope you all enoy and have celebrating the beautiful boy’s bday <3

♡ masterlist | requests

it was hard for you to sleep.

harder, when shoto wasn’t around.

sometimes it was your thoughts that kept you up; late at night— dark thoughts that swirled around in your head and slowly poisoned your brain with heavy black venom. it was hard to sleep when your mind was heavy with fear, but ever since dating shoto todoroki; those nights became easier and sleep wasn’t so hard to come by.

you weren’t so sure what it was about your boyfriend that made it easier for you to get some shut eye; it’s not like he really knew either. todoroki just didn’t like seeing you in pain, the way your face twisted with discomfort or the way sleepy tears would wet your cheeks under the moonlight— but you had somewhat of an idea, that his fresh peppermint smell and warm arms are what often helped you.

shoto would so lovingly sneak into your room, no matter the time, dusk or dawn— he would hold you tight under the sheets until you drifted off to dream land. even if it meant being teased by the others for stumbling out of your room in the morning, his pretty hair a wild mess creating the image that’d you’d both been up to no good, he’d face it all for you, over and over again.

but tonight, your loving, caring and doting boyfriend was nowhere to be seen— everyone’s second internships had begun and todoroki had chosen to work with his father along with izuku and katsuki, so it was no doubt that they wouldn’t be home until late. what with endeavour being the number one and all.

your friends knew about your struggles to sleep, of course, todoroki bluntly mentioning how you ‘like to sleep together’ to soothe your nightmares ( iida had lectured you about it after, saying it was inappropriate while deku and ochako turned as red as your boyfriend’s hair ) so offered to stay up with you— but you needed rest, today’s training sessions  having taken a toll on your body, and wave them off with a smile laced with tiredness.

you could call him, he wouldn’t mind and you know it— but he’s with his father and that takes enough out of him as it is.

you decide, instead, to trudge to the dual quirked boy’s bedroom, instantly calmed by his sweet peppermint scent embedded into every inch of his dorm. you swipe one of his clean sweaters straight from the closet before hitting the lights and snuggling into his bed.

tonight would be fine, todoroki would come home, wrap you in his arms and with the aid of his scent surrounding you— you would sleep safe and soundly.

is what you hoped as you drifted off to the land of dreams.

when you were younger, you watched your older brother, haru, get hit by a car.

the scene haunts you to this very day, crawling up on you while you rest at night— choking you out in your dreams. you see it now, feet glued to the ground as you’re forced to watch the younger version of you, mess with your older brother using your new found quirk. your parents had called it scenery, back then your powerful quirk had been their pride and joy, giving you the ability to create a mirage in a certain targets mind— make them see things that weren’t really there.

back then it was fun to play tricks on your sibling— you made haru see all of his worst nightmares, everything but the road.

everything but the oncoming car.

everything but his untimely death.

you want to scream at little you— tell her to stop and that it’s not funny anymore as she forces your brother back into the road— he’s giggling, he doesn’t know it yet and neither do you. but the words you want to say die down deep in your throat, suffocating you from the inside although they burn at your lungs to burst through.

why cant you speak? why cant you stop her?

adrenaline trickles into your blood stream as you will yourself to run out into the street and protect haru from the oncoming traffic just as he slips off of the sidewalk. your senses are blown out of the water, static noise filling your ears and intertwining with childish screams and the sound of a not so distant honking horn.

you claw harshly at your throat. speak. save him. for god’s sake; do something.

“you’ll kill him! stop! you’re going to kill him!”

the flickering of artificial, yellow light behind your closed eyes has you jolting awake, sweat forming at your brow and hands clenched tightly around your boyfriend’s plain bedsheets. your gaze darts across the room while your heart thumps loudly in your ribcage from the fear that struck you in your dream and finally, your stare settles on a shirtless, bewildered shoto todoroki. his face is a little scratched up no doubt from being on his father’s patrol and he looks exhausted but that doesn’t stop the concern he has for you taking over his expression. “yn—?”

“s-sho,” you hate how your voice caves so easily, the single syllable of your nickname for him falling wetly from chapped lips. todoroki is by your side in an instant, not caring that he’s only half dressed and half awake. he’ll deal with that later.

with tender hands shoto cups the back of your head, letting you sink into the warmth of his flesh. you reach out for your boyfriend and he’s there, taking your free hand in his and giving it a gentle squeeze to help ground you. “love, what happened? why didn’t you call? you know i don’t mind—” his timbre voice fills your ears like warm honey, calming your rapid breathing but all you can do is shake your head.

“nightmare ‘n you were working,” you pant, cutting him off while the death grip on your lover’s hand begins increasing. you feel so far from the ground, the scene of haru’s death dancing across your mind. “i killed him, again—“

shoto watches your body twitch with fear and your usually glimmering eyes gloss over in away that makes him feel sick. you’re not here with him yet, still tangled up in the black string of your bad dreams. the world around the dual eyed boy begins to change and it seems you’ve activated your quirk by accident— showing him scenes of the day your brother died.

you screw your eyes shut as flashes of his body tangle with reality to the point where you don’t know what’s real and what’s not. you’re losing control of yourself so easily, fresh sets of tears stinging their way down your streaked cheeks. trapped. you feel trapped like a bird in a cage even while you’re awake and the sounds of cars and screaming burn at your ears once more.

make it stop, please.

“yn... come back to me love, i’m right here,” todoroki’s calm voice cuts through the suffocating song of death, dragging you back to reality while the effects of your quirk drift away. his fingers, although contrasting temperatures, now cup your cheeks to tilt your face towards him so that your eyes lock with his under the crescent moon. “you didn’t kill him. that wasn’t you. it wasn’t your fault.”

you blink away more tears like a helpless child, chest heaving but todoroki doesn’t give up. “but—“

“no.” your boyfriend says softly, yet sternly, leaning down to place an eskimo kiss to your nose. your eyes flutter shut at his simple gesture, although it raises saftey and warmth across your body— black radiates behind your closed eyelids, no longer plagued broken bones and blood. it’s easy to keep breathing from there, focusing on that as todoroki pulls you into his lap and the sheets fall away from your body.

“no,” you repeat back to him while shoto’s arms settle on your waist and his familiar scent of fresh peppermint fills your senses. “not my fault.”

it wasn’t your fault, that day the car had come speeding down a usually safe road in a residential area. the accident was a hit and run, but being a child made you feel every ounce of the blame. shaking the thought away you curl into your lover’s chest, listening for sounds of his heartbeat while he toys with a lose string on his sweater— the one you wear.

“that’s right, good girl...not your fault, here with me yet, love?”

when you glance up, todoroki is looking right back down at you— brows creased with worry but there’s love in his stare, overwhelming amounts that make you hum into his bare chest, grounded by the feeling of his skin against yours. “present and accounted for,” his chest rumbles with relieved laughter, soothing you even more. “thank you, sho. i’m sorry for making you do this so late at night.”

this time, shoto shakes his head— sending locks of red and white flying. “don’t thank me and don’t apologise,” his words are feather light in the dark while he manoeuvres you both onto his back to settle into bed. you’re about to mention that he’s still half in his suit, but your boyfriend doesn’t seem to care, already closing his eyes. “i’m yours, your boyfriend and i’m going to support you no matter what. i’ve got you, okay? you’re always here for me so i’ll do my best to do the same for you. what kind of man would i be if i wasn’t?”

“a very unmanly man,” you tease with a kitten like yawn, already feeling the confines of a more comfortable sleep, taking over.

todoroki rolls his eyes but pulls you closer to him anyways. “you’ve been spending too much time with kirishima.”

“at least i don’t spend everyday working with bakugou, now that’s true nightmare.” you counter, narrowly missing a pinch to the side from your boyfriend.

the pair of you sleep soundly that night, wrapped in each other’s arms. you feel safe, knowing that nothing could ever harm you, as long as you were with him. shoto todoroki would give anything for to you to have a goodnight’s rest. no matter what. even if it meant staying awake with you and being late to patrol with endeavour the next day.

not like he cared, he hated his dad anyway.

[scriptaed]

cherry blossom avenue.

❀ genre: angst/fluff; arranged marriage!au; f2l!au;

❀ pairing: jin x reader; 

❀ length: 23.0k;

❀ synopsis: college would’ve been unbearable if it weren’t for your wallowing sessions with your best friend jin over a shared “forever alone” woe, so it really was only a matter of time until the two of you sealed a shoddy promise to betroth the other at the age of 27. perhaps it was only a silly joke to you then, but you should’ve known better nonetheless; because when a wedding invitation arrives five years later down the road with his name signed next to another’s, feelings that were once buried begin to blossom once again.

“Don’t be a homewrecker.”

What was supposed to be a light-hearted tease over your fleeting glimpses in his direction bears much more weight than even reality should have; and unbeknownst to her, even if your friend’s commentary strikes a fear in you, a fear that has some creature eating away at you and a horrifying drop in the twisted pain of your chest, the daunting knowledge of a potential truth behind her words pale in comparison to the anguish brought upon by a familiar face of the past. 

Because even as you stand far and hidden behind the crowd of overly dressed classmates and unacquainted businessmen all painted by a silhouette of dimmed black, you manage to observe him through the few albeit sure opportunities; for when the passersby chatter, cross, and weave through the lavish ballroom floor at the perfect time, place, and space for you to peep through the pinholes seemingly formed by pure happenstance or a cruel wish casted upon by fate, the clock returns to a buried state of mind.  

It’s a state of mind seven years stale, mistakenly manifested and deliberately buried. It’s a transition in mindsets when fondness sours into a longing for something that could never be, for his reciprocation of affections means much less than its origins. It’s a heavy moment when you’re finally sure he would never come to speak the language of your enamored being. It’s that fractured frame in time when everyone freezes in their tracks but a reverberating pain transcends the laws of the universe, almost as if on a personal quest to oust you; and even if you vehemently down yourself with another magical shot of liquor, nothing can quite ease the internal war stirring within.

One hand grasping a glass of red wine worth much more than a month of your salary and one arm crossed under the bosom draped over by your only presentable black satin slip dress, you’re almost numb to the turmoil that is irony. How cruel is it that even after seven years of having believed you had moved on, nothing has really changed after all? Your heart still melts in the wake of his dorky grin, your chest still winces over the buried buds of a coveted love, and your blood still runs intoxicated by the presumption that this phase of infatuation would pass with time. 

Your friendship, your feelings, your shared promise, a youth that no one had paid witness to except for you, him, and that cherry blossom tree down that street, nothing has really changed. In fact, you feel as though you could still march across this room and nonchalantly probe at your best friend’s cheek with the ultimate goal of eliciting a shriek from your best friend. 

And yet, the circumstances that have brought you back to him in this very room must have been the one cruel exception. 

“A ‘homewrecker?’” you feign a light-hearted chuckle, swirling your drink and taking another sip as you peek at the distorted glass-image of the man and the woman beside him. “And why would you say something as horrifying as that?”

“Didn’t you say you and, what’s his name,” Alex pauses before nearly gasping, “ah, Seokjin! Didn’t you say you two used to be best friends in college? You might have been his best friend but she’s his fiance now, Y/N! Plus, she’s got a baby in her, too.” 

She might have been joking, and it really should have been if you had been truthful about your feelings for said best friend, but maybe this is the price you’re paying for so dutifully holding onto your dignity; so, instead, the deep undercut of her remark instigates a stirring irritation within you. Raising a questioning brow at your friend is all you can muster without spilling your secret as well as your brewing storm. 

“Oh, so you actually do remember what I say when you’re only a minute from blacking out?” 

“Hey,” your friend recognizes the anger seeping through your body language, stifling a giggle as she tries to bump your elbow and stumbles over her heels, “it was a joke, okay? I’m just looking out for my friend!”

“Right, what is there to even look out for?” 

“Well,” she points a finger at the direction you had just been staring off into a minute prior and leans in to whisper, “you’ve been staring at the newly engaged man for much longer than the woman beside him, if that says anything—”

“—uhuh, as if, hey!” you almost yelp as you help her stand upright once again. A scoff of disbelief escapes your lips over the sight of your friend letting herself go. Grabbing her glass and swiftly placing it onto the tray of the many passing waiters, you squish her cheeks and give her a light pat or two. “The only person you need to worry about is yourself. Why are you even wearing those ungodly stilettos when you can’t even wear kitten heels without whining all day at work?”

“Hey,” Alex pouts, bending one knee and jutting her hips to show off those torturous pink devices on her feet. “I told you about my ex from high school, don’t you remember?”

“So it’s okay if you’re trying to impress an ex from high school, but I’m not even allowed to glance at my old best friend?” you quip, pressing your lips into a thin line as you take another gander at your friend up and down. “And what does excessive drinking even have anything to do with it?” 

She flashes you a mischievous grin, “for confidence.”

“I can’t with you,” the roll of your eyes must have agreed, “and what about the classmate friend who actually invited you to her engagement party?”

“Oh,” Alex glances at the woman beside Jin and shrugs, “she’s alright. She’s that typical good girl. Too smart, too kind, too good at everything that you really want to hate her but have no reason to do so. I’m sorry, Y/N, but your best friend is devilishly handsome and I’m not surprised she’s marrying someone of her league.” 

“Pfft, why are you apologizing to me?” you scoff, ushering her to the washroom and shaking your head along with the stream of confusing emotions that hit you like a truck. “Go wake yourself up before she or, gasp, worse yet, your ex spots you.” 

“Oh my God, you’re right,” she gasps, shuffling in her skintight red bodycon dress and whirling around once more to call out before finally disappearing, “let me know if any boy comes looking for me!” 

“Uhuh, yeah, sure,” you shoo her away, taking another sip from your glass and muttering under your breath, “...how am I supposed to recognize your high school classmates?”

Now that your friend is gone and you’re left all alone to your thoughts, you go against your own advice and down another glass of liquor. 

You may have been his best friend but she is his fiance. 

Well, if Alex is a good judge of character, then at least a good man like your best friend has found an equally respectful woman. It might have hurt to hear her words, but Alex isn’t exactly wrong. At the very least, you could sigh in relief having known you’re genuinely happy for your best friend’s future. 

It’s just that the truth hurts sometimes. 

Relief isn’t an excuse for lingering onto a soon-to-be-married man, regardless of when these emotions came about. 

People are chattering all around you, strangers and former acquaintances are bustling about, familiar college classmates are greeting the bride-to-be’s high school classmates, and yet here you are: aloof and isolated even in a room of hundreds, fixated and more distant than you have ever been to the boy you had once cherished as the closest anyone could get to knowing the real you. 

No one would know but Jin. 

The real you.

The you who could not have moved on because she couldn’t recognize her own feelings until seven years down the road with a wedding invitation in hand, seven years after the buds had been sowed, seven years too late. 

The one who stands pathetically here in the corner of a room, secretly hoping for him to approach her but also wishing for the night to pass unnoticed just like she had wished for her buried affections to pass.  

So you shuffle in place awkwardly, pondering whether you should’ve caved into Alex’s pleas and attended this posh get-together, debating whether you should dip once your friend realizes her high school ex just isn’t worth it, sipping the remainder of opulent liquor and taking one last peek at the boy, when, your heart strikes loudly against your chest…

...because his eyes catch yours, a pair amongst hundreds, one invitee amidst an endless swarm of crowds, almost as if on a planned rendezvous, a secret unbeknownst to everyone in the room but the two of you.

Eyes widening in shock, the drums of your chest hammer against you, each strike pumping a nearly painful high that fuels your fight or flight mode. The debate between confronting your longtime friend and fleeing said friend did not even cross your mind at the start of the predicament. Quickly whirling around, head down and hands gripped to your drink, your feet move on its own. 

A familiar series of clicks echo against the polished marble tiles. You don’t even have to turn around to recognize those homecoming footsteps, those awe-inspiring confident strides as he makes his way across the room. If this were you from seven years ago, you would have welcomed him with open arms and he would have claimed you were just acting sweet to bargain for some fresh pastry, but the unfamiliarity of a stranger you have yet to reconcile with has you in an unexplainable panic. 

After all, it’s hard to explain why exactly his persistent pursuit after you, after seven years of distance, both emotional and physical, frustrates you to no ends. 

Your hands form fists, your feet storm down the halls, and your mind could repeat nothing but the words you had excused as “just a light-hearted joke.” 

You may have been his best friend but she is his fiance. 

Don’t be a homewrecker.

A baby in her.

A baby.

His fiance. 

A homewrecker.

The accusations echo and echo, as though screaming at you in the endless cave that is your mind, until the party fades, the crowd disappears, and the ear-piercing classical music wanes against the walls of your temporary solace, the bathroom. Finally, entrapped in a world of black—black tiles, wine colored walls, and dark red roses perched on top of what seems to be a black granite sink—you’re left alone to your thoughts. 

Alex wouldn’t understand a seven-year-long regret because she doesn’t know the real history between you and Jin. In fact, no one invited to this engagement party nor does anyone in this whole mansion know of the soon-to-be groom’s past. 

It isn’t as simple as people might make it out to be on the surface, because no one but you, Jin, and the street down your block had paid witness to a shoddy, spontaneous promise that should have never been made. 

Turning on the faucet and splashing a fresh handful of cold water onto your face, your eyes eventually wander from the stream of water that flows down the drain up along the glass bowl of a sink and into the mirror to meet the sullen eyes of a girl, seven years older with a stain of regret that spans much longer that a mere seven years. 

❀ ❀ ❀

“Waaah,” the boy exclaims as you watch your own reflection narrow its eyes at the image beside you. The spectacle persists to angle his chin every which way until he’s finally satisfied with the protrusion of his jawline; and as the boy resumes his daily activity of marveling at himself in awe, you have to wonder once again, for the hundredth time by now, just how you two had possibly become best friends. “Looking good, Jin. Looking real good.”

“Ugh,” you roll your eyes and feign nausea, “narcissist.” 

Jin pauses in the midst of his inspection, allowing his phone to settle into his lap and turning to glance at you with his head as high—well, almost as high—as his ego. “When you look as good as this,” he gestures at himself and your eyes follow his crafty fingers up and down, “don’t even try to tell me you wouldn’t be all up in yourself.”

You blink your eyes blankly and start with the most accusatory tone you could muster, “excuse you, Kim Seokjin, but are you saying that I don’t look good?” 

“You’re insisting that yourself, not me! It’s not my fault you can’t appreciate your God-given looks,” Jin raises his hands mercifully and you almost miss his latter, back-handed compliment when you become entranced by those double-jointed fingers of his. “Plus, I said ‘when you look as good as this.’”

“Psh, yeah,” you mumble, “and yet here you are, still as forever alone as ever.”

“Hey,” he snaps, narrowing his eyes at you even as he raises his phone to take yet another selfie, “and what does that say about you?”

“...and that’s exactly why,” you chirp as you hastily smush your cheek against his and throw a peace sign just as he snaps a photo, “we’re gonna be forever alone together!” 

“Hey, why’re you ruining my selfie—” he pauses in the middle of his camera roll “—oh, we actually look good.”

Glimpsing at one of many candid photos of you and him, a helpless smile spreads across your lips. A warm breeze blows and you can practically smell the impending spring that breathes life into the pink buds hovering on the cherry tree above you. The sun’s embrace against your bare legs that lie beside your best friend’s on the red and white checkered picnic is a perfect compliment to the equally bright phenomena that are his high-pitched giggles; and like the many days you’ve spent the past year, the only thing that could possibly elevate this moment of serenity would be a bite of his weekly pastry batches.  

Speaking as you chow down on the carbs, you quip, “you mean you look good?” 

“That, too, but I meant us, together—” he articulates, cutting himself off abruptly when he snaps his head to find you digging into one of his many bread “—hey, who said you could start testing without me?!” 

“Too many selfies, too slow, too hungry,” you lean your head back to plop the remainder of the custard-filled bread into your mouth, “shmorry Jin, but dish ish delicious.”

Just as you lean forward and take another large bite out of the batch, Jin catches right up to you, snatching the remainder and plopping it right into his now-stuffed cheeks instead. Lips falling agape at the disappearance of your bite-size donut, you gawk at your best friend whomst chomps happily away with your piece in his mouth. 

You can still recall the heat of your cheeks after the first time he had ever proclaimed something that was yours as his—in fact, it wasn’t much long ago when Jin had nearly regurgitated a mouthful of mocha frappuccino after discovering you had sneaked in a sip or two prior—but now? Sharing commodities has become such second nature to you two that sometimes you wish he could return to his germophobic days just so you can hog all the food…

...and maybe to relive whatever magical flutters that had befallen you on that very first day.

“Of coursh ish delicious!” he manages to exclaim incoherently. “Kim Sheokjin baked it afta all!” 

“Yeah,” you take a long moment to gulp and make room for more food, “I think I prefer the ones with custard—”

“—so it’s a perfect batch just like m—”

“—almost perfect.”

You could see yourself wink through the prideful glint in his eyes quickly plummet into a glare that has you laughing at the downfall of his indestructible ego. His playful glare through the corner of his narrowed eyes silently commences yet another one of your daily staring challenges. Maybe that’s why the two of you made such a perfect pair amongst the thousands of classmates at school. After all, how would Jin ever find someone as tolerant of his incessant dad jokes and perpetual ego as you are? And how would you ever find someone who would bake you goods and cook you lunch and, not to mention, spout such peculiar humor? 

All of your classmates had dubbed the two of you as the perfect comedy duo—the dumb and the dumber, the silly and the sillier—that, apparently, is the essence of a match made in heaven, albeit probably meant to be more platonically than romantically. 

Both too stubborn to lose, even in a meaningless game of a staring contest, not even the heat of the sun rays that has you two nearly sweating bullets could deter the match. Eventually, seconds turn into minutes and minutes turn into a frenzy frozen moment in time as you start to fall into the sudden abyss you found yourself in that is the warmth pool of his eyes. 

Perhaps it’s the angle at which the rays strike theatrically on the apples of his cheeks, illuminating his dewy skin and enhancing the chocolate hues of his orbs hidden underneath the matching brown locks of his all whilst his eyes happen to be staring right back at you. You’ve never quite felt this way before—heart palpitating, throat constricting, and mind panicking—but for the first time ever, you’re hesitant in allowing your best friend to peer through the windows to your soul. 

This isn’t good. What would he do if he were to discover your frenzy? Would he tease you to no ends? 

Worse yet, would he falsely assume that you’re hardcore crushing on him…?

“Oh God,” you blurt out, breaking eye contact to avert your head to the side across the street. Your lips begin to mumble whatever comes first to mind, “uh, wow, look at that couple. Ugh, PDA—” your eyes flicker to find Jin raising a brow just before your eyes avert once again and he follows your line of sight “—am I right?” 

“Oh c’mon! Just admit it,” Jin chides. “You’re only using this to disguise the fact that you were just about to blink, weren’t you?” 

“I was not about to blink,” you insist but your shifty gaze tells the both of you otherwise, even if the true lack of confidence is unbeknownst to Jin. “You suck at staring contests. How many times have I won before? I was just distracted, okay?”

“Oh yeah?” Jin crosses his arms. “Distracted by what, then? Huuuh? By my devastatingly good looks?”

“No!” you exclaim almost too adamantly that you have to add in a nervous laugh at the end, which only has Jin staring at you in utter disbelief. Feigning an apologetic pressed smile, you gesture your hands in the direction of the couple supposedly hidden behind a fence but clearly exposed to those on a hill, otherwise known as you two. “I meant them—”

“—ew!”

The both of you exclaim in unison, selflessly covering the tarnished eyes of the other and ducking away from the moment of intimacy that you two had just intruded on. 

“Aw, cmon! Even after graduation, too?” Jin remarks, mouth gaping and hands falling from your shielded eyes only to be thrown to his side in bewilderment. “Does everyone really have to remind us just how lonely we are even on our last day?” 

“You mean how lonely we are and how lonely we will be for the rest of our lives?”

“For the rest of our lives?” Jin quirks a brow at you before shaking his head and shrugging. “Dang, that wasn’t exactly my plan, because the world will be forced to acknowledge my looks sooner or later, but I mean, in your case…”

“What?!” you gasp in disbelief, slapping his arm hard enough for him to wince. “What do you mean ‘in your case?’ I bet you haven’t even kissed someone yet!” 

Jin snarls at you as he pulls his arm back and retorts, “yeah? And I bet you haven’t either!” 

“Actually, I have, with Joon at that party last year,” you say smugly, crossing your arms with a chin held high, “and you just admitted you haven’t had your first kiss yet.”

“Psh, yeah, I haven’t, and?" the boy holds his head high akin to a child arguing with his body and not with his words. “Because I prefer to save it for something meaningful unlike someone here.” 

“Hey, are you insinuating that it wasn’t meaningful?”

“You’ve always told me how much you hated parties!” he throws his hands up. “Plus, you don’t even like Joon! You said his breath stinks!” 

“Well—” you pause but no words come to you except for a loud grunt “—ugh, fine. You’re right.”

“Of course I’m right,” he turns away, leaning into his right hand with an elbow propped against his crisscrossed lap. “I’m Kim Seokjin, after all.” 

Following suit, you mumble into your propped hand, “I guess that’s why we’re friends in the first place. Together and, yet, still forever alone.”

“Hey, I said I don’t plan on being forever alone.”

“Right, right,” you brush him off, “tell me that when you actually get a girlfriend—actually, tell me that when you find someone to marry who doesn’t run for their life just one month into your relationship.” 

“‘Marry?!’” he gawks at your demand. “I haven’t even had my first kiss yet and you’re talking about marriage?!”

“What?” you turn to face him, cheek resting in hand. “Didn’t you say the world would soon recognize your charms?”

“Hmph, well,” he says with a jutted lower lip, “definitely sooner than you.”

“Really?” you gape at his bold proclamation despite clearly being the one with the upperhand. “You really think you’re gonna get married before me?” 

Your best friend doesn’t even bother glancing at you before answering, “bet.”

“Okay, if you win, then I’ll eat the crust to your breads whenever you want. I’ll even throw in a bonus for you and spare your wife from having to see fetus photos of you in college,” you can only snicker at the lightbulb that goes off in his widened eyes. “And if I win, then you’ll have to eat my crust and delete all the ugly photos you have of me on your phone.”

“Sorry, can’t do. That would take me an eterni—”

“—shut up.” 

“Okay, fine, bet,” he cackles, straightening his back and stretching his arms out before him, “and what if neither of us ever get married?”

“Hm,” you purse your lips, “good point. Should we set a time cap to our bet? Ideally, if I want to have a stable job and income by 25, have children by 30, enjoy two or three years of marriage without kids, then…”

“Why do you have to have children by 30?” Jin frowns. “Why set all these unrealistic standards on yourself?” 

Putting a finger to hush his lips, you almost find yourself distracted by the plush warmth against your skin. Quickly, you answer, “long story short: parents.”

“Ah,” he utters even as your fingers are pressed to his lips, “ditto.” 

“Let’s set the cap to 27,” you propose. “If neither of us get married by the age of 27, then we’ll just call off the bet. But damn—” the two of you simultaneously lean your chins into your palms “—that means we’re really gonna be a disappointment to our parents forever, huh?” 

A loud, heavy sigh escapes the both of you; and while you stay pouting into your hands, staring into the fresh green grass on the downside of the hill off in the distance, Jin props his hands back against the blanket and cranes his neck back to look off into the distant sky. You hadn’t noticed it until now, but for a devilishly dashing guy like Jin—broad shoulders, facial features that could only be gifted, and a prominent Adam’s apple, especially with his head rolled to the back like this—you have to admit his lonely status must have been much more of a choice to Jin than it is for you; because even for someone like you, his best friend who gets to stare at his profile for as long you desire in all its glory, you have yet to become desensitized to his dazzling visuals that is anything but normal.

As much as you hate to admit it, even now, with a clear blue sky, an array of warm pastry aroma, and a field of freshly cut grass, you can’t help but become enamored by the person before you. 

And when another sigh befalls his lips and the two of you have settled into a comfortable silence and a breeze passes by the both of you, rustling a dozen or so of the hovering cherry petals to grace the surrounding air, he speaks. 

“Let’s get married if we’re still single by then.” 

“...huh?”

“I said,” only his eyes move to peer down at you effortlessly, “if we both lose the bet, then let’s get married.”

Your eyes pop and you can only utter the few words that reach you, “to each other?” 

“No, to food,” he says sarcastically, grabbing a piece of his bread and stuffing your face with it when you continue to stare at him and he shuffles awkwardly in place. Looking away, he mumbles, “of course to each other, who else, dummy?”

“Uh….huh,” you blankly nod your head as a series of laughs are stifled by the bread. “Okay, and you’re being serious?”

He doesn’t look at you when he answers, “uhuh.”

“Pffft, and you’re saying you would keep that promise? That you would even remember this moment? We’re just gonna marry? Like that? And you’re assuming I’m just going to agree?”

“Hey,” he turns to frown at you, “why wouldn’t you agree? I’m offering you a once in a lifetime opportunity!”

Munching down on the bread, you continue to play along in amusement, “really? And what exactly are you offering me? You know I have high standards, right? I’m not just going to accept any proposal.”

“I know. That’s why you’re still single…” the boy deadpans, even as you glare at his remark, “...but, that’ll all change when you witness my proposal! Hear me out. First, I’ll cook every meal for you for the entire day.”

“You almost already do that except for breakfast.”

“Okay, but I’ll hone my skills by then. It’ll be even better than any restaurant we’ve ever been to.”

You raise a brow, “so you think food is the way to my heart?”  

“No offence, but yes, that’s why we’re friends,” he quips before continuing, “second, I’ll bring flowers to you at work. Everyone at your job will be burning with jealousy!”

“Because of your public display of affection, which we both clearly disdain?” 

“No, because they would wonder how you have such a handsome boyfriend like me!” he wags his finger. “Plus, who doesn’t like a little PDA when they’re about to be proposed to?” 

“Okay, fair enough, but those are two promises you’re making for the proposal. A marriage is a lifelong commitment. Why would I want to marry you just for food and flowers?”

“Hmmm, even for someone like you, I’m surprised you have so many requirements,” Jin hums, tapping his finger on his chin. “How about this, I’ll make three more promises for our marriage.”

“Quit saying ‘our marriage,’ I keep shuddering at the thought of it,” you remark as you rub your arms. 

“Third promise, I won’t break your achey breaky heart,” he deliberately emphasizes each word in a fruitful attempt to send shivers down your spine. “Fourth promise, I’ll remember all of my promises.”

“Okay… and fifth?”

“I’ll keep all of my promises! And I’ll do it all right here at this spot. Our spot.”

“What? That’s dumb,” you giggle. “Just keep it at four, then.”

“No,” he grabs the bagel in your hands and fills his mouth without a second of hesitation, “ish eashier to wememba fibe promishesh.”

“Right, right, right,” you nod, pressing your lips in a vain attempt to muffle your chuckles. “And what promises would you want me to make?”

“You?” he quirks a brow before shaking his head. “Nothing. You’re fine. I like you just the way you are.”

Huh. Has Jin always been this nice? Because you don’t quite recall ever feeling the heat of an oncoming blush of your cheeks or the bashful flutters that come with your best friend’s witty remarks. Maybe the topic of marriage has thrown you off today or maybe it’s the aftermath of a high having just graduated college and being thrusted into adulthood, but the stretched smile that adorns your lips is an undeniable fact that your confidence and spontaneity has reached its pinnacle.

Grinning, you lean across Jin’s lap to grab and unlock his phone to access the camera, “okay, wanna take a photo to commemorate this moment?”

“Gee, if you want a photo of me that bad, you could just ask me to send you a selfie, y’know—what the,” Jin starts to cackle when you raise the phone into the air and suddenly press your cheeks against his without warning. With a side-finger gun to frame his cheeks and chin, your best friend readies his pose as you wear a mischievous smile. “Hurry up and take the picture already, Y/N. My time is money.” 

“Hey Jin,” you call out to him with your eyes still fixated to the phone screen, as does his. 

The boy almost drags his words, “now what?”

“You’ve never had a girl kiss you on the cheeks before either, right?”

“What—”

—click.

“There,” you chirp jubilantly, grinning at the stunned look on his face, his eyes popping and his lips just slightly parted but failing to utter a single word as his hand grazes the spot on his cheeks where your lips had just touched, “now you have zero excuses to forget our promise!”

❀ ❀ ❀

That must have been the last time you had met up with Jin in person. Shortly after graduation, the two of you had parted ways as many are forced to do in order to embark on their lives as full-fledged adults. Being born with a silver spoon in his mouth, Jin had been lucky enough to receive a job offer straight out of college with the help of family connections; although, even without his family name, you whole-heartedly believe he still would have managed on his own based off of his unparalleled work ethic that you had the chance to witness firsts-handedly. 

On the other hand, your parents had advised you to stay home, which happened to mean you would be stuck in the same town of your college, until you finally landed a decent job where you had met Alex and established a new life. Unfortunately, like life always does, all that busywork meant sacrificing contact with your best friend somewhere along the way.

“Hey, Y/N! Wait!”

“Ah, shit,” you mutter under your breath as you stop in the midst of your tracks down the black-marbled hallway, gritting your teeth and composing yourself just as you’ve done countless times around your less than friendly colleagues. Taking a deep breath in and out, you put on a pleased smile and whirl around to find the face of a familiar boy in your most recent reveries. “Ahh, hey, Jin... It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”

“Ah,” the man, who seems to have grown at least or three inches since you had last seen him, scratches the back of his head. “I didn’t expect to see you here tonight… how have you been?”

This is awkward. So painfully awkward. 

“Me? Oh, I’ve been alright. Life. Adulting. You know the drill,” you press a thin smile. “Actually, I’m surprised to be seeing you here tonight. I still remember us whining all throughout college over being forever alone, and yet here we are… at your engagement party… life can be funny, huh?” 

“Y—” he stutters, scratching the back of his neck “—yeah… it can be.” 

“So,” you chirp in a fruitless attempt to lift the suffocating atmosphere, “the wedding is coming up pretty soon! Feeling good or is someone getting cold feet?” 

He shakes his head weakly, “I wear socks to sleep.” 

“Wh—” you pause for a quick second, blinking blankly at his soft chuckle and following suit shortly after “—why do your jokes sound like you’re 22 again?” 

The man shrugs with a helpless smile hinted in the corners of his lips; and when it happens—you don’t know how or when the silence had whisked you away into a past time—you find him gazing at you with that fondness of a sole friend who endlessly shared and fought informidable woes with you. Perhaps you’re a hopeless romantic frozen between the fork of two roads that have long closed, for you swear you can see your own reflection through his warm brown eyes and you surmise the only possible answer to the question that lingers in your mind. 

He must see the same friend in you, that girl he would only call friend.

“You’ve been preparing your whole life for this, or, actually, maybe I should say we’ve been preparing,” you smile to stifle the lurching ache in your chest, “I guess I’m the only fool waiting for her turn now.” 

A weep cracks the laugh you force out of your knotted throat. Immediately, you turn your head to avoid his watchful gaze and tuck a lock of hair behind an ear whilst discretely ridding any traces of waterworks welling in your vision. You think you must have gotten away with the feigned laugh and turn, a routine you had mastered at your previous work, but the gradual dissolution of the curve on his lips settles into an unreadable flatline more resembling a frown than anything; because even after all these years, he can still read you like an open book. 

So, if he could see through your every facade even now, then why does he not remember? You know you shouldn’t hold it against him, such a silly promise built on a lonesome pair of naive hearts,  but you can’t help it when a single word paints your conscience. 

Why?

Why can’t he remember? 

Your shared promises, your birthday, your memories, and... you?

“Y/N,” Jin begins gently, hesitating in place once he takes a step forward and you flinch, “about the wedding date…”

He waits for you to reply, supposedly for ‘whenever you were ready’, as he always does during those fragile lows of yours. 

To avoid letting loose any more unneeded drama, you can only manage a hum, “mm?”

“I…” he pauses and sighs. “I know it’s your birthday.”

A hitch in your breath is audible. You clamp your lips tightly and nod, uttering lowly, “yeah.”

“I want you to know I didn’t decide the date, Y/N,” he says firmly, “my father did.” 

“And?” you quip suddenly, eyes darting to shoot a glower deadly enough for him to twitch in evident hurt. There, you went ahead and did it. As hard as you had spent the past months muting your rawest reaction to the envelope in your mailbox, all the pent up frustration and sheer sorrow for a lost future came whiplashing just as hard. “And you couldn’t tell your father to change the date? Maybe one day after? Or two?” 

“You know I would have asked if I could, Y/N,” he bites his tongue to state sternly, “but how would he understand? Change it for… for what—”  he laughs cruelly in the midst of his burst “—for the birthday of a best friend I lost contact with for five whole years?! That’s so… so dumb—” 

“—dumb…?”

The crack in your voice leads to a stagnant silence over what is clearly a no man’s land. Betrayal visibly paints across your face, the momentary display of having wronged his closest ally stains his own. 

“Sorry, I didn’t meant that...”

“‘...yeah, you’re right,” you scoff, “I’m dumb for waiting five whole damn years’ because you wouldn’t fucking text me or call me to ask how I was doing!”

“Me?” he asks in disbelief, gawking and pointing an accusatory finger. “You wouldn’t even pick up your phone! I called you for a month after I moved!” 

“I couldn’t pay for my phone, alright?! I was living with my parents and scrambling to find a job, any fucking low wage job, and I couldn’t sit all day in my room waiting for your calls because I’m not born with a silver spoon stuck in my ass!” 

At this point, the conversation had somehow contorted into an all out brawl of words, a challenge to see who could blame the other for the unsaid confessions lost in communication. The two of you staring down the other, chest heaving and jaws clenching and brows knitting, if it weren’t for your fortunate location tucked in the hallway hidden from the main room, you would not have allowed yourself to fall, lost somewhere in the depth of his eyes. 

“Why are you so upset?” a weak, hopeless laugh tumbles from his confused, pained expression. “Aren’t you supposed to be happy for me?” 

“I—” something gets caught in your throat and you have to choke it out “—I am. I am happy for you. I’m not upset, no…”

Jin reaches a hand out to your cheek when he notices your tears but immediately retracts his notion when you flinch backwards. The boy frowns in concern, “Y/N… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell. How did I upset you?”

“Nothing,” you frantically shake your head that hangs low, using the back of your hands to smear every sign of contradiction on your face. “I just—” your breath shakes and an impending series of hiccups begins to kick in “—I’m silly. I should be happy for my best friend. I mean, I am happy. I’m just being dumb.” 

“What?” Jin carefully takes a step forward. “No you’re not—”

“—I’m dumb, okay, Jin?” you finally muster the courage to lift your sights to find his own confused ones. “It’s been five whole years and I’m embarrassed for taking a joke of a promise so seriously when my best friend doesn’t even remember making it!” 

The scrunch in his brows and lost resolution only reverberate the deafening ache in your chest. “The promises…? Y/N, I—”

“—it’s fine,” you blurt. Shaking your head and stumbling backwards, you look him straight in the eyes to say your last words before the fading knocks of your heels against the wood are all that he hears. “It's my fault for believing in a foolish fairytale anyways.”

❀ ❀ ❀

It’s almost like a fever dream when you recall just how confidently you had spat those spiteful words and furthermore dared to depart with that sheer satisfaction and the slightest aftertaste of alcohol residing on your tongue that night; but now that you’re awake, sober, and without the power of liquor, there’s nothing that can pull you out of your greatest nightmare most recently manifested into reality. 

“Why the hell did I do that? Why the hell did I do that? Why the hell did I do that?” 

The incessant grumbles tumble freely from your lips whilst you pace back and forth in the corner of the office. Typically, your colleagues would describe you as composed, reserved, and the level-headed half of an otherwise wild pair with Alex. This morning, however, they begin to question everything they’ve ever known about you as they watch through the corner of their averting eyes. 

“I knew I shouldn’t have left you alone!” Alex hisses under her breath along with the threatening glares she shoots at the audience. Considering how long you’ve been going at your mental breakdown, it doesn’t take very long for your shuffling footsteps and mumbling gibberish to transcend into yet another white noise in the office; and once the majority of the passersby settle on the new revelation of your hidden crazed nature, Alex hastily storms to your side as you begin banging your head against the wall. “Why would you throw a tantrum at your best friend’s engagement party?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying…” you pause momentarily to groan before proceeding to damage whatever is left of your seemingly deteriorating brain. “Why the hell did I do that? Why the hell did I do—”

“—not to mention, an ex best friend who never even knew about your unrequited feelings—”

—she comes to an abrupt stop when she finds the deadliest scowl in your dart-like eyes. No words are exchanged but the lethal consequences are clear enough to grant you her silence and the continuance of your destruction. 

“Why the hell did I do that, Alex?” you whimper, taking a break from your antics because, damn, your forehead is really starting to hurt. “Whyyyyyyy did you have to leave me alone? Maybe Jin wouldn’t have found me and I wouldn’t have had to confront him over something that shouldn’t even matter anymore! I-I barely even know him… it’s been five years and, suddenly, here I am, voila! At his engagement banquet, yelling in his face and getting mad over feelings that aren’t even his fault!” 

“I told you to go easy on the alcohol.”

“I told you to go easy on the alcohol,” you retort. Taking a deep breath, you let out a sigh along with the scowl plastered across your face. Your next words come out more as a helpless confession of fear than a rhetorical question to be answered. “Do you think he… hates me…?”

Alex observes you for a lingering second, perhaps contemplating between a merciful albeit exacerbating answer and a merciless albeit helpful answer. She speaks carefully, treading dangerous water, “well… would you like him to?”

“I don’t know,” you shut your eyes to heave yet another sigh because that weight in your chest refuses to leave you alone. An unapologetic swinging of the door and a series of loud, wide strided footsteps that follow have your brows furrowing and it takes everything in you and Alex, judging by the sudden shuffles you hear by your side, to finish the rare heart-to-heart conversation. “I think… I think if he hated me, maybe that would extinguish that part of me from the past. If he hated me, I would be able to get over it. Maybe I would hate him too, out of spite, but at least I would be able to get over—””

“—it…? Over what, Y/N?”

Over what? It takes you much longer than it should have for you to surmise the most probable answer to her question, an answer you were never willing to admit and an answer you aren’t quite sure you’re ready to admit even now. 

“You know what I’m implying, Alex,” you sigh, shutting your eyes even tighter when a rising heat marks your cheeks. “I want to get over—”

—but your words are cut short by a familiar voice that has your heart racing and striking an unprecedented strife in the mayhem that is your systemic state...

“You can’t possibly hate me, Y/N,” he proudly proclaims and you can practically hear him smiling, “no one ever hates Kim Seokjin.” 

...and when your eyes finally flutter open, you find the man, who had only seemed like a phenomenon of your feverish dream a second ago, standing before you and adorning that signature smile with raised cheek apples and crescent-like eyes that has yet to change under the influence of time and distance. 

“W-What are you doing here…?” you barely manage to utter. Eyes flickering around your surroundings, from Jin’s broad shoulders that shield nearly the entirety of a helpless albeit buoyant Alex, to your colleagues who fail to discreetly whisper over the lavishly suited mystery of a man, and finally back to the bouquet of pastel flowers wrapped with a bright pink bow. Brows furrowing, you struggle to organize your thoughts and even go so far as to check for the dent in your reddish forehead in a vain attempt to dispel the mind tricks. When the mirage before you fails to dissipate into thin air like sand, you slowly turn to face the wall again only to have your antics disrupted by his refreshingly cold hand on your burning forehead ; and when you turn, you find Jin’s mischievous smile growing wider by the second. “H-how do you know where I work…?”

“I’m your best friend, Y/N. Have you somehow forgotten after all that head banging?” Jin scoffs in disbelief, gawking with a chuckle. Suddenly, he leans in to grab your right hand firmly in his own, squeezing twice as he had always done and leading you toward the exit. “C’mon, let’s go recover those memories of yours, eh?” 

“Wait, wait,” you nearly stumble over your own feet at the pace he’s going, struggling to catch your breath when he bursts through the last door and a blast of freezing wind envelops the clash of the heat reverberating from your beating heart. “I have to go back! I still have work! And, and… and where in the world are you even taking me?” 

“Tsk, tsk, tsk, Y/N, so many dumb questions for someone who always topped my grades,” the boy holds the bouquet of flowers out toward you, refusing to continue until you reluctantly accept his gift with your left hand against your chest. Smiling at your reluctant acceptance, Jin turns his back on you and proceeds to march into the parking lot but his now warm hands intertwined with your now cold hands never loosens its grip. 

It’s been a long five years of waiting to finally relish in the hold of his familiarly slim, often teased albeit self-praised double-jointed hands, but, now that you’re finally living in it, you’re sure it was all worth it… even if the crashing flames at the end of this road is an inevitable, foreseeable future.

“Jin,” you frown as you stare at Jin’s opening of the car door and gesture of an invitation, reluctantly seating yourself in his sumptuous car. “I failed half of my exams... remember?”

The boy’s laughs can still be heard even through the closed door as he makes his way around the car front, all whilst swinging the keys in his forefinger. His cackling steps an abrupt many levels of decibels higher when the opposing door opens and he plops into the driver seat. “That never stopped you from boasting, did it?” 

Without the flare of your usual clever quips, you purse your lips in silence and subconsciously hug the bouquet closer to your chest to keep his space as unoccupied by your presence. The sudden turn of events has your head spinning and your heart racing enough for the thumps to be felt by your hands. 

How did he find out where you worked? Where was he even taking you and what was he planning to do with you? Why was he acting as if you had not angered him just two nights ago? 

You don’t think you’ll be getting the answer any time soon, particularly the latter question, but when your stomach growls loudly, eliciting a crackle of a laugh from Jin, the awkward tension in your muscles eases ever so slightly. 

“...s-sorry… I skipped breakfast.”

“I know,” he puts the car into neutral at the red light and turns to peer at you with a smug look that says he could still read you like an open book, “because you always skip breakfast. I hid some pastry in the bouquet.” 

“What?” you scrunch your nose but immediately dive your scavenging hands into the flowers; and sure enough, you find your favorite cream-filled bread of his warm in your hands and you can’t stifle the smile that spreads on your lips. “Why would you even do that?”

“Well, in case you suddenly got really jacked and physically refused to come with me, then at least you would have something to eat.”

“No,” you giggle, “I meant why would you hide the bread in the bouquet…”

His eyes brighten like a lightbulb, as if only now recalling the genius plan he had crafted himself, “oh, because then you can sneak a bite without having to leave your desk! It always worked with our backpacks, didn’t it?” 

Your sights fall to the bouquet and you can only reply with a sheepish grin, “right… it sure did.”

The engine purrs to life again when the light turns green and the remainder of the car ride is filled with the smooth drift of his ride and the ceaseless albeit completely welcomed humming from his lips. The old Jin never had enough of an incentive to drive, although his parents always suggested gifting him a brand new car and you had begged him to take the offer out of boredom and a never-ending desire to escape far away from university, but something about this moment in time has you feeling cozy, belonging, and at home. It’s almost like it was meant to be. 

But the silver ring shining around his finger under the angle of the sun is a dreadful reminder that it isn’t. 

So, as a slap to yourself back into reality, you fracture this perfect moment you would have once framed in that hopeless mind of yours, “so… how did you find out where I worked?”

“Ah,” his right hand casually slips onto the back of your headrest. “Still haven’t figured out, rank 292?”

“No, I haven’t, rank 295.” 

“First,” he raises a finger, “I asked some people through the grapevines and eventually your friend Alex gave out.”

Grumbling under your breath, you curse, “damn it, Alex.”

“And second,” he raises another finger before proclaiming firmly, “I’m proving you wrong.” 

“Proving me wrong?” you articulate with a scoff. “You’re going to prove me wrong? Right, keep dreaming.”

“I’m not going to prove you wrong, I am proving you wrong," he insists before shifting the car to neutral and leaning in toward you, gaze brimming with conviction locked with your own wary ones, as if ready to spill a secret sworn by the two of you and hidden from the rest of the universe. 

He's close enough for his minty breath to graze your burning cheeks, to breathe a vigorous life previously unknown by your dull five years. Heart pumping and lungs barely working, daring not to budge for being caught under the sway of his gravitational force, you can hardly catch him when he finally speaks.

"I haven't forgotten, Y/N,” he utters, “I'm a man of my word."

❀ ❀ ❀

Promise one. 

"I'll cook every meal for you for an entire day."

Promise two. 

"I'll bring flowers to you at work."

His unabashed, overly detailed tactic to ask for your hand in marriage still echoes from a time long past. Hopes for those promises were weakened by each passing second but unequivocally unassailed at birth. Eventually, smothered and disheartened, you had been forced to cut ties and confront the reality of broken promises and broken dreams. You had once somehow convinced yourself things would never return to the ways they once were, and, yet, here he is having returned by your side and here you are enraptured by the utter joy in his laughs after all this wavering time. 

It's like a dream come true; and if this indeed all just a nightmarish dream bound to death, you wish you never swore allyship to this alcohol, for now your only wish is for it to succumb you into a deep, long slumber. 

“I toooooooold you I don’t like paaaaasta!” you whine, the drag of your voice manifesting in white puffs in the still chilly spring air. The sudden transition between the warmth of his house to the frozen world outside has you spiraling into a series of trips and stumbles; and as always, your best friend Jin is the only one to hold you up, which is a good thing considering how you would’ve been tumbling into the death trap of a river beneath this bridge. “So whyyyy did you make me pastaaaaaaa? Whyyyyyyy?”

“What? Why’re you blaming me?” he retorts, obviously taking offence. “You always loved pasta! You ate it every single day at uni!” 

“I diiiiid love pasta,” you say through barely parted lips, “but it’s all just… just carbs, carbs, carbssss…” 

“Since when did you care about carbs?” Jin frowns, poking your cheeks that lean against his sturdy arms. “Should I call the police?” 

Your brows furrow and you lift your head to narrow your eyes at him, “what? Why?” 

And as soon as those words slip from your lips and he raises his finger-gun hands, you wish you hadn’t asked in the first place. 

“Because I think you’re an impasta,” his finger guns transform into jazz hands after you stare at him in dumbfounded silence, “...badumtsss….”

A series of empty blinks are exchanged, as if neither of you had just witnessed his most tragic dad joke to date; and so, you swiftly continue with a sigh, “I think… I think I started caring ever since heee mentioned I was getting fat.”

“I can’t believe you just ignored my unprecedented joke…” he grumbles to himself but lets out a little huff when he catches you from tipping over. Wordlessly, he hooks his arm with yours to keep you close to him. “And this ‘he’ you mention, who’s he?” 

“Heee.” 

“Who? Who’s ‘heeee’?” he spouts with pouty lips and a raised chin, flailings his body, and therefore yours, about every which way like a toddler. “Who’s this man I have to beat up, huh? He better square up!”

“I don’t think you could beat him up…” you mumble, eyes heavy but determined enough to reach his own flabbergasted ones. “It’s Jooooon, dummy, Kim-Nam-Joon, the boy I shared my first kiiiiss with…”

“Kim Namjoon?!” his eyes widen. “You think I wouldn’t be able to beat up that nerd?!”

You almost manage to push Jin away the foot of the bridge if it weren’t for his firm lock around you. “Have you seen his muscles?! He might not look like it with his books and all but he worked out all the time!”

“Yeah, well,” his lips sputter, “well, have you seen my muscles?!”

“No—” you freeze when you realize the sturdiness of his arm against your head is existing proof against your word, and maybe it’s because of his obvious flexing at this moment, but you could not believe just how built his arms had grown in the past five years, “—and I don’t want to.” 

“Hah! You just don’t want to admit that I’m right. C’mon, I’ll show you. You feel it, huh? You feel it?” he flexes persistently, twisting and turning to maximize his little showcase. “So? You think I can beat him up now?” 

“Well…” your voice trails off, mind clearly preoccupied with sticking your cheeks to his arm like glue in a somewhat fruitful attempt to hide the flush in your face. “You don’t really need to beat him up…”

“What?” he almost yells. “Why not? He called you fat!”

“Well, he…” your shoulders rise with each confession, “he said one of my dresses looked tight on me…”

“And?”

“...and he wasn’t exactly wrong…”

“So?”

“...so he didn’t actually say anything offhandedly…”

“What? You should’ve told me earlier!” Jin exclaims, arms thrown high into the air and consequently pushing your helpless self onto the hillside grass beside the run of the river. Lips gaping and eyes popping, you watch him in full offense as he mumbles to himself before resuming his stroll down the hill. “And here I am getting worked up over nothing… can’t believe I thought I could play hero for once…”

“Hey, Jin, what do you mean by that?” you call out to him. “Wait! I said wait for me, Jin!”

When your rhetorical questions are answered with silence, you hasten to your feet in order to catch up with those damn wide strides of his. Damn it, how did he make it halfway down the hill already? Each of your exclamations are unsurprisingly disobeyed by the boy who just throws his head back over his shoulder with that cheeky grin of his as he quickened his pace. Following suit, your strides turn into a jog and your jogs turn into a full out sprint until the both of you are full on running the 100 meters dash, one chasing and one fleeing, wind blowing refreshingly into your heated face and into your tangled locks and inflated lungs that relish in the breath of life. 

In the midst of all the chaotic bliss of an epiphany, you find yourself screaming and laughing at the top of your lungs...

“Hey! Jin! I swear I”m gonna kick your ass!”

...and it’s at this moment in time that you realize having forgotten what it means to be a fool who lived and not to live to be a fool. 

At some point in time, after having caught up to the knucklehead and giving a piece of your mind, the two of you settle down along the concrete ledge beside the river after a jittery, welcomed high. The sunset that followed was a pleasant surprise that had you two reminiscing over the countless mornings and evenings you had spent watching the sun rise and set together whilst churning throughout tireless exam nights. Pink, golden streaks now hidden behind a thick coating of midnight blue embellished by magical glitters all throughout, tonight’s stargazing becomes a first for the two of you. 

As much as you hoped you could numb yourself from the inevitable aftereffects of this death wish of a dreamy day, you can’t help but smile, thankful to have been completely sober to engrave this night into memory. 

“So...” Jin’s utter is the first to break the silence. He turns his head to give you a playful look of eyes that beams with wary curiosity, “...you started dating Namjoon after I left?”

“Mm… maybe,” you hum, “why? Got a problem with that?”

“What? Psh, what? Why would I have a problem with that?” he snorts. “The only problem I would have is the fact that you never asked me for permission.”

Your eyes widen, almost threateningly, “are you saying I need permission from a man to date another man? Not to mention a man who abandoned me without warning!” 

“Okay, first of all, it’s not my fault you cancelled your phone plan! I called and called, I tried everything I could even though I was deadbeat tired every day. It’s not my fault I thought you hated my guts! So please just understand that I didn’t abandon you, alright?” he spills in an endless stream akin to a water faucet left on the highest setting, clearly a performance either practiced in private or incited by years of pent up pressure. You can practically see the steam shooting out of his fiery red ears and the accompanying whistle manifesting into words; and by the time his chest is heaving, his lungs are panting and very dramatically so, and his eyes flicker nervously between you and the passing water, you can’t help but snicker. Unsurprisingly, your lack of empathy elicits an unamused look on his face. “Hey, hey, what’re you laughing at, huh?” 

“Me? Oh, nothing,” your hands move into your laps and you bat your eyes innocently, “it’s just that I can’t believe you’re blaming me, a helpless, poor girl with absolutely no connections, for cancelling her phone plan as a last resort to make ends meet.”

“Hey, hey, hey,” he warns with an accusatory finger, “don’t you dare think I’ll fall for that eye blinking and whatever cute act you’re playing up again!” 

“Why?” you pout, almost cringing at your own antics. “Am I not cute?”

“No, you’re hurting my eyes. Plus, if anyone’s cute here,” he declares adamantly before puffing his cheeks and poking one with his forefinger, “it’s me.”

The both of you stare at the other for a stagnant few seconds, one completely dedicated to his performance and the other utterly flabbergasted by what plays out before her. 

The only word you manage to crank out is a, “uh…”

“What do you think?” he raises another finger to poke his other cheek. “I practiced just for you.” 

“Um… you’re 27 now, Jin.”

“So?” he tilts his head in the other direction. “Still 22 and young at heart.”

“Yeah? Then I’m still 22 and still equally disgusted by aegyo—” just as he parts his lips to provide another rebuttal, you quickly add in “—by your aegyo.” 

And just like that, the man drops his boyish character just as quickly as he had stepped into it. He mumbles, dropping his hands and shooting an equivocate look at you, “okay, tough crowd. Sorry, ma’am.”

It shouldn’t have been that hilarious nor should your response been so delayed, but it only takes a split second of his surrender for a thunderous cackle to slip from your lips. Throwing your head back and peering at the dangling stars above, you allow yourself a moment to close your eyes and take a deep breath of the incoming wind. The fresh petrichor of spring and the earthiness of mowed grass whisks themselves into the cold, clean breeze from the vast body of water. Thin locks of hair grazes across your cheeks, swaying in the wind as does your spirit. Years are lifted from your shoulders and all that is left is the heaviness that remains in your chest; nevertheless, you have never felt so free from the past. 

“Also,” he adds nonchalantly, cocking his head to look at you, “I wasn’t speaking from the position of a man. I was speaking as a best friend. As your best friend.” 

And just like that, sitting side by side and sharing a cool breeze, it’s almost as if all these moments of remorse, spilled tears, and unreleased frustration were made to build the climax to this grand finale: the night you can finally speak your truth. 

“It’s funny how things never change, huh?” you say when your eyes flutter open and you find Jin looking over with a fondness identical to the one you’ve spotted years before. “We can split for five years, thinking one hates the other’s guts, and reunite again as best friends… as if nothing had ever happened.”

Jin chuckles, hands grabbing to the ledge and head lolling back to join you but his eyes remain fixated on you, “I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not. Are we vampires and we just don’t know it?”

“Yeah, well, I’m not sure either… not sure about the good thing and not the vampire thing, that is,” your laugh settles into silence when you spot the reflected light inflicted by the ring around his finger, sitting on the ledge just an inch away from yours. Close enough to touch but far enough to confirm an unequivocal truth. Sighing, you turn your head to meet his intent gaze with a bittersweet upturn to your lips, “normally, I really despise the idea of change; but lately, when I think about how things might never change between us, how we’ll always banter as a pair of stupid best friends, I start wanting it more than ever.”

Is this the moment? Is it all really happening right now? Judging by the course of your blithe actions, if change is what you’re looking for, then change is what will surely ensue after tonight. Whether for the good or for the worse, you’ll take a reluctant guess of the latter. 

The man scrunches his brows before playing it off with a nervous laugh, “what do you mean things haven’t changed? You dated Namjoon, probably got it on a few times here or there—”

“—what—”

“—please don’t confirm,” he butts in with a raised hand, “and I have, too. Sure things have changed!”

“Ooh?” you raise a brow, genuinely shocked. “You finally got some experience under your belt? I’m impressed, Mr. Kim.”

“Hey,” he scolds, “what do you mean by ‘impressed?’” 

“Well, I should’ve known… figuring you’re about to be a married man and all…” you mumble, forcing a smile despite the sudden dip in your mood. Turning your head to stare off into the opposite end of the river where the black silhouette of skyscrapers lie, you curse yourself mentally. You really thought you could get away with the inevitable truth for the entire day? “You know, I can’t believe I almost forgot that you’re getting married in less than a week. Almost like how I couldn’t believe you almost forgot our promises.”

“I told you Kim Seokjin is a man of his words.”

“You sure about that? Promise one: cook for me for an entire day. Check. Promise two: gift me flowers at work. Check,” you turn around once again to look him firmly in the eyes and it’s almost as if the both of you know what’s about to come next. “What about the three other promises, Kim Seokjin?” 

“Y/N…” his voice trails off but his gaze never leaves yours, almost as if too afraid to be misconstrued as another betrayal. 

Quick-mindedly, you chime, “stop looking at me so seriously! I’m just joking! Promise three: you won’t break my heart. How could you after a wonderful day like this? Promise four: you won’t forget our promises. Clearly, you remember. And promise five: you’ll keep all your promises. Check.”

“Y/N,” he stifles every wince but you can tell by the way his feet have stopped kicking into the void. “I don’t think I’ve kept all those promises.” 

“Well,” you shrug, pressing your lips into a line tightly, “I only see checks in my book, Jin. You’re good to go—”

“—no, Y/N, you need to listen to me,” he says sternly; and when your mouth falls agape and your head slightly nods, his wary eyes searching for a steady sign in the windows to your soul, he continues calmly, “my marriage is actually an arranged marriage.”

“Your—” you blink blankly, jaw almost falling to the floor “—your, you, what?”

An arranged marriage. 

All this time, all this pain, all this heartbreak of wanting to do something about your feelings but remaining hopeless because of an unrequited love… turns out to be an active, fully conscious decision? Not a falling out of love, not a helpless affection for another woman, but a matchmaking handcrafted without the heavens?

“My,” he has to stop himself just as his breath hitches, “my father... arranged it. ” 

“What? Why? Is it because he prefers you with a well off family?” 

“What? No,” he shakes his head with a slight upcurve to his lips that you’ve never quite seen before. Watching him hook a hand to the nape of his neck, clearly avoiding your eyes, you have an inkling of something much worse than the presented news. “You know my father would never do that… it has nothing to do with money...”  

“But you left this town for money, didn’t you? For a better job, a better pay, a better life, and for the sake of your dignity as a dutiful son, are you telling me none of those were related to money?” 

His eye twitches by your name-calling, clearly pained once again despite knowing very well of your precedent dislike toward his silver spoon background and his nonnegotiable obedience. Each second of silence culminates a tension even more formidable than the last. Guilt intoxicates your boiling blood enough for you to bite your tongue and hold yourself back; because after accusing him of holding onto his dignity, you, yourself, could not forfeit that of your own either. 

Worse yet, you’re a complete hypocrite. 

“Why can’t you just tell him to call it off?” 

You never knew silence could be so deafening.

“So… so do you...” you begin hesitantly. Usually, with your eyes locked with his, a thousand words would have been exchanged with each passing second; but now, with gazes that wade through the tides of the unknown, for the first time ever, you don’t recognize the mystery before you. “Do you... love her?” 

His lips part slowly, but no time in the world would be enough for him to find the right words. To you, his silence is as clear as any possible answer. Something sinks in you, perhaps after acknowledging the implications behind his choice to leave your question unanswered, but your blood boils from the audacity of those apologetic eyes that, even now, never stray from yours… as if this minute of sincerity would be enough to mend the inevitable decade of scars. 

You begin slowly, failing to hide the shakiness of your deep breaths, “...then what about the baby?”

“What baby...?” his face contorts with a frown until, out of the blue, something flickers across his numerous expressions: confusion, remembrance, contemplation. His hesitation that ensues might have been fleeting but its infliction upon your shattered trust will surely remain. “Oh, that… that was just a rumor my aunt spread because of the sudden marriage.” 

“And,” you force yourself to breathe, scattering for something, anything to throw at him, “and you don’t think you could’ve told me sooner?”

The man scrunches his brows, “and that would’ve helped, how?” 

“‘How?’” you repeat, as if it was the dumbest question you had ever heard. Mirroring his expression, your eyes avert between him and the river as scoffs of utter disbelief escape you. “‘How?’ What do you mean ‘how?’”

“I mean exactly that!” his voice suddenly escalates to a level of frustration you’ve never quite heard from him before. “How would it have changed anything? Why would you need to know earlier?”

Gawking, you exasperate desperately, “you know why!” 

“No, I might be your best friend but don’t expect me to just read your mind!”

“It’s cause...” you swing your leg over the ledge to face the sidewalk with your back on Jin as soon as you could feel an incoming constriction at the back of your throat, a notorious sign shared just between the two of you that waterworks were about to appear. Breathing slowly and doing just about everything to keep your voice from shaking, and fruitlessly so, you mumble before standing to your feet, “...you know what? I don’t even know anymore. I’m sorry. Nevermind.”

Why did you ever think you would have a chance? 

Is this it? Is this really it? The end? 

The questions come crashing into you as you make your retreat, head hanging low and palms drying the inconvenient tears that mark your face. After all the confidence you had built up, after finally thinking—actually, believing—you could get over him tonight, how humiliating is it that you’re now running away from a reality that would eventually and inevitably engulf you? 

The worst part of it is, Jin, like the best friend and good man that he is, persists to chase after you. You don’t have to hear the quickened footsteps of his usual wide, well-paced strides to know he’s coming. You don’t have to hear the calls he makes on the top of his lungs for you to know he’s on his way. 

As someone who so helplessly fell in love with their best friend, you just know he would be there through thick and thin—whether you like it or not. 

“Y/N!” Jin hollers; and when he finally catches up to you, having to sprint and consequently inciting for you to surrender with an abrupt stop to your path, every bit of air is knocked from your lungs. Arms wrapping over your waist and enveloping you into a tight hug, you can feel his heart pounding against your back. 

To most, it should have been the perfect method to comfort a crying friend; so, damn it, why does it only make you cry harder? 

“What?” your voice cracks as you just barely manage to smear the following tears within the wrap of his bear hug. “Damn it, Jin, why can’t you leave me alone for once?”

Head resting on yours, his voice is muffled by your hair as he murmurs, “I can’t just leave my best friend crying like that. I shouldn’t have yelled. I’m sorry.” 

He embraces you. He embraces you not only physically through the silence but also through the emotional rollercoaster that comes with it. He, Kim Seokjin, your best friend, holds you through the ups and downs and the rights and the wrongs. He even holds you now, comforting you in the hurricane that you brewed without ever knowing and never caring that he had, in fact, not committed any wrongdoing. If anything, you must be in the wrong. 

And when you put it that way, how could you blame yourself for falling in love with him?

“Jin… I’m sorry, I tried everything to stop myself but,” your voice shakes but your courage prospers, “but I just, I just really, really love you.” 

A second passes. 

Now, two. 

Then, three. 

Something strikes against your chest when the surreality of the situation settles into reality. His silence could mean many things, but the tightening of his embrace could only mean one. Blood flushes your cheeks as you lament over his sensation of your fervent heartbeats. Secrets thrown out into the spring air, your heated cheeks are equally exposed to the passing, chilly zephyr. 

He knows you love him. At this moment, he can physically feel the proof of your love and there’s nothing he can do about it. 

“Sorry,” you manage to blurt under your breath, “I shouldn’t have said anything. Forget I said—”

—the remaining words dissipate into thin air when he places his hands firmly on your shoulder and whirls you around. Face just inches away from his, you barely catch wind of his declaration before the unthinkable occurs…

“Too late. I don’t want to.”

...and his lips meet yours. 

It’s everything you have ever imagined. Years of admiring those plush lips, wondering what it would be like to feel the warmth of those wonders pressed against yours, are finally coming to fruition… except they don’t. His hands fall from your shoulders to the small of your back, but your hands don’t intertwine behind the back of his neck like you imagined. Instead, they hover in midair, hesitant to embrace him in your arms. Why? With your eyes and his fluttered closed and an audible deep sigh that signals a desire finally satisfied from the both of you, reality still manages to twist a dream-come-true. 

Does he actually love you or does he only pity you?

Finally, and ever so suddenly, your hands firmly push against his chest to plant an arm’s distance from you and him.

“Sorry…” you pant, avoiding those intense eyes. “We… we can’t do this.” 

“What?” Jin raises a brow, taking a step forward as you take one back. “Why not?”

Wordlessly, you point at his ring finger.

“Oh,” he chuckles nervously, hand scratching the back of his neck. You can only watch his every move, your stare gradually becoming a glare. Rosy hues coloring his cheeks, he speaks sheepishly, “I forgot we’re in public.”

His nonchalance irks you to your core. There isn’t any other way to put it. Blithe and dense have always been your favorite traits of his, but now that he’s here? Planting buds he could never sustain and sending mixed signals despite knowing of your feelings in an unfitting circumstance were never things you knew Jin for.  

“I-I don’t get it, Jin,” you shake your head. “I don’t think we should see each other any more. In any context. Not even after the wedding.” 

With his hands buried into his pockets and shoulders high enough to hide his reddened ears, he glances up at you, alert. “What? Why? What don’t you get?”

“It’s ‘cause... I just don’t get… this. I don’t get us,” you articulate, struggling to find the right words. “Why are you so… nonchalant about this? Why are you kissing me? Is it out of pity? Is it because I said I liked you—”

“—Y/N,” he says lowly like the drop of his previously cheerful mien, “you know I would never do something like that.” 

“Then why?! Why are you doing this to me? Do you love her or not?” you pause for a second to stifle the crack in your voice but, alas, all is in vain. “...and do you even… love me?”

He frowns, the tension in his body evident by the knitting of his brows as he struggles, “I… Y/N...”

“So you can’t admit that you love her and you can’t even lie to say you love me. So why the hell are you throwing away an entire marriage just to kiss me?” your scoff comes out more so like a plea. “You’re confusing me, Jin—”

“—that’s,” he abruptly pauses to stop himself from exploding, taking a deep breath before continuing, “that’s exactly why I can’t say it, Y/N! I don’t want to confuse you. I don’t want to disappoint my father. I-I don’t want to complicate matters more!”

“Then why the hell did you kiss me?!”

“I don’t know, okay?!” he throws his hands in the air. “I don’t know! It was a spur of the moment! I couldn’t stop myself from chasing after you and when I hugged you—I-I just wanted to, alright? I’m sorry.”

He’s... sorry. 

Sorry for kissing you, sorry for acting as if your feelings had been reciprocated, sorry for breaking all the promises he made and pretending like he was going to patch things up again tonight. Speaking your mind and hearing his words are all that you need to finally understand what you need to do. Your heart drops but you hold your head high because your final verdict is the right thing to do. Maybe this time you’ll finally be able to cease these useless feelings. What's the point in pursuing a hopeless love? 

The only one you would be hurting is yourself. 

This epiphany, in itself, is enough to drape an ephemeral clarity over your frenzic self; and just like a bandaid over a scar, you’re able to function, if only just temporarily.

“Hey, Jin?” you call out softly to the boy kicking at nothing on the bare sidewalk. It’s hard not to melt under the delicate glance he throws over his shoulder. “I’m not… mad. Well, I kind of am. But that doesn’t change the fact that I’m sorry for everything that I said about your upbringing. I know how close you are to your family. I’m sure you’ve been under a lot of pressure…”

“No, Y/N,” he shakes his head, turning his body to face you with a low hanging head, “it’s my fault. Even considering all that, I still shouldn’t have done that or any of this. I… I’m sorry for confusing you.”

Forcing a composed smile, you persevere, “do you have your fiance’s number?”

Head lifting with a frown, he answers, “yeah, what kind of a fiance would I be if I didn’t? Why though?”

“Right,” you say to yourself under your breath, hearing his ‘fiance’ echo relentlessly in your head. “I just need it, okay? To… to sort out everything...”

And just when you wonder how insensitive could this boy get...

“What?” he chuckles. “Are you going to fight for me?”

...it gets worse.

Rolling your eyes, you give him a hard, well-deserved slap against the chest before snickering at his loud wince and declaring your one last confession of the night. 

“No, I could fight for us, but I won’t singlehandedly fight for you,” you then declare with a bitter smile, “I will, however, tell her how jealous I am.”

And that's your most irrefutable confession, one that has Jin stupefied for the future midnights to come.

❀ ❀ ❀

Morning arrives much sooner than you had anticipated. White puffs mark the air whilst you wrap yet another layer of scarf around your neck. It seems as though the breeze from a night ago had intentionally danced around town, lingering and spectating on the resolution of your five year long love conundrum. Ironically enough, the two of you reunite at the very spot where everything had first started… except this time, everything will finally end.

The pain he had marked in you inflicted by the words he could not bring himself to say still stains your every waking second.

“You have to do this. You can do this,” you incessantly chant to yourself, pacing back and forth beside the most prominent cherry blossom tree in town. “You have to do this. You can do this—”

“—Y/N, is that you?”

What you presume to be Youngji’s voice perks your ears. Looking up, you spot her holding a phone in her hands as she flickers between you and her screen. A quizzical quirk of the brow plasters across your face as you wave at her and she jogs over to you as quickly as she could in that pink, wool poncho and those tan, fluffy boots. “Hey, Youngji, right?” 

“Yeah,” she says in between each pant of breath, “that’s me.” 

Her hands immediately find refuge on her knees whilst she bends over to catch her breath. Typically, you’re the very self-aware type, but there isn’t anything you could do to stop yourself from staring. The girl strikes you as… flamboyant. With her dark red pigtails, bright smile, and dainty attire, she’s everything you’ve always imagined a female version of Jin would be like. It’s hard not to wonder… maybe an arranged marriage really can be a match made in heaven, but you force yourself out of that rabbit hole before having another breakdown in front of an innocent stranger. 

The tang of jealousy, however, refuses to budge. 

“Sorry, for,” she pants, holding her hand up to show you her phone screen, “calling out to you like that.”

“No, it’s fine,” you squint at the sight of the screen displaying a candid photo of you, taken on this very street on that very day, as you stuffed one of his breads in your mouth. Drawn on your face is a mustache and a unibrow. “Did Jin do—”

“—Jin gave me a terrible reference photo.” 

Scoffing, you cross your arms, “damn it, Jin.”

Youngji crackles into a firework of uncontrollable laughter, rendering you stupefied. After a literal minute passes by, she finally manages to speak in between the bursts of giggles that follow, “you two—” giggle “—really are—” giggle “—close, huh?” And as a grand finale, she slaps her stomach with a loud sigh of relief that her laughs have come to an end. When she notices you staring at her bewilderedly, a light bulb flashes through her as she gasps and feigns a whimper, “o-oh! Ow! M-my baby!”

“You know you don’t have to pretend, right?” you can only let out a laugh of disbelief because you still can’t take in the mirror image your best friend. “Jin already told me about the fake pregnancy.” 

“Oh, in that case,” she smiles widely before giving her stomach one more big, satisfying slap, “see, you guys really are so close!” 

“I… I guess. I’m not sure if taking me out for one day after five years of radio silence really counts as close, though,” you then quickly add in with raised hands, “he only did so out of obligation, though! I swear it was nothing more!”

“Hmmm?” she hums, leaning in a curious ear with a cheshire-like smile. “Is it because of those promises he made?”

“...yeah, wait, he told you about those?” 

Of course he did, idiot, they’re engaged. 

“Well, something like that,” she shrugs, “so how much did he tell you?”

“About?” 

“About the wedding, silly!” 

“Uh, nothing much really. The pregnancy was a false rumor, the marriage was arranged by his father…”

“Father?” she inquires, watching you closely with those big, round eyeballs of hers. 

“Yes?” you hesitantly nod. “Father?” 

“Ah,” she nods, as if she finally catches drift of something, “I see.” 

“Oh yeah,” you add, “I also found out it’s on my birthday.”

“What?!” her eyes grow wider, if they even possibly can. “Jin never told me that! What the heck, man? A wedding? On his best friend’s birthday?!” 

“Yeah, yeah, I know right?” you nod passively before coming to an abrupt stop. “Wait, what? Why does it matter to you?”

“Of course it matters to me! You’re Jin’s best friend, aren’t you? You have no idea how much he talks about you back home. I know you so well that sometimes I feel like you might be my best friend,” she chimes before reaching out to cup your hands in hers. “Let’s celebrate properly with Jin after the wedding, okay?” 

“Um, sure…”

But you don’t exactly plan on unnecessarily sticking around his life for any longer than the wedding… except, seeing how close she must be with Jin in addition to her loose-lip impression, you decide not to tell her that. 

“So,” she drops her hands to the side, “what did you need to tell me?” 

Why did you call her to meet you here again? After witnessing her flamboyant entrance, it’s hard for you to keep yourself from derailing. 

“Oh, um,” you scratch the back of your head awkwardly, “I just wanted to meet my best friend’s fiance, that’s all.”

“Ahhh, I see.”

The woman pauses, nodding at you intently almost as if waiting for the real intentions to be revealed. Damn it, either you’re a literal open book or she reincarnated from the same soul as Jin’s. 

“So…” you purse your lips. “Are you okay with it? The arranged marriage, I mean?” 

“Well,” she shrugs, finally dropping the smile from her lips. “At first I hated the thought of it. I felt like I didn’t really have a choice, but… when I met Jin—” a smile is hinted in the corner of her lips and in the sparkle of her eyes “—I thought ‘I’m pretty lucky girl, aren’t I?’ I think the world must have finally taken pity on me.”

A soft, stifled laugh slips from you as your eyes fall to the ground and a bittersweet smile accompanies your lips, “yeah, you’re pretty lucky.” 

“Don’t get me wrong though,” your eyes immediately shoot up to find her raising defensive hands, “it wasn’t some sort of a love at first sight. He’s handsome, sure, but—”

“—a marriage is a lifelong commitment—”

“—exactly,” she sighs, “I didn’t really know him, but when I was forced to spend time with him… I thought if I had to get married, then he would be the best option. He’s not a bad guy.” 

“No,” you smile in your reverie, shaking your head, “he's not a bad guy at all; and when you really get to know him, his stupid dorky self, I think it’s impossible not to fall for him.” 

“Yeah?” 

“He’s mean when he jokes around but he’s actually very kind, he’s sensitive when you poke him where it hurts but he hides it deceptively well, he’ll apologize for being wrong when the both of you clearly know you’re in the wrong, he’ll cook and wear the hottest pink clothes he can find because ‘to hell with societal norms,’ he’ll tell you the dumbest dad jokes but I promise you’ll get used to them eventually, ” you let out a reminiscent laugh that comes out more like a sigh, “and, sometimes, very rarely, he’ll hurt you unintentionally, of course, but he’ll always go out of his way to make it up because that’s just… that’s Jin. That’s my best friend.” 

A breeze passes by to perfectly mark the end of your cadence. Branches rustle above you and freshly budded cherry blossom petals flutter their way toward the grass underneath the two of you only to be risen once again by a following zephyr. Having been there throughout his and your lives, it’s almost as if the long-standing tree is agreeing to attest to your words. 

“Wow,” Youngji finally says after witnessing your truthful albeit embarrassing spoken love letter, “I… I wouldn’t doubt any of it… but why are you telling me? Shouldn’t you be telling Jin?” 

“I’m telling you, because,” you emphasize, “because I'm jealous of your position but I can't do anything about it so I want you to take good care of Jin. I just… I need to know he’ll be in good hands. I want him to be loved like the way that he loves. You’ll do that, won’t you?”

Youngji just nods. It’s the most somber response you’ve ever seen from her. Almost like the joining of hands in marriage has finally become reality. 

“Do you…” you struggle to squeeze out of the knot in your throat, “do you love him…?” 

“Y/N—” she begins but suddenly lets go of whatever she must have had planned “—yes, yes I do.” 

“And… you’ll take care of him?” 

Youngji bobs her head lightly, “yes, I will.”

“Promise?” 

“...promise.”

“Okay, then I’m entrusting him to you, and,” you smile, leaning forward to shake her hands before heaving one last sigh, “and this time, please keep the promise.” 

❀ ❀ ❀

A curse sinks into the thickness of the sapphire dusk that quickly descends upon the hushed city. Keys tinkle to decorate the silence of tonight’s resting wind, a silence that would have been accompanied by an equally passive woman and an oblivious man whose hands persist to fumble to his guest’s dismay. 

Standing before a small willow, vintage-looking store tucked away in the corner of downtown, an inaudible breath ascends a cloud of white that momentarily shrouds the grand interior peeking from spotless windows that line the exterior. Golden warm studio lights illuminate the gorgeously exquisite ivory gowns from the trailing trains up to its waterfalls of dainty veils. Velvet suits and satin neckties accompany each headless mannequin, welcoming each passerby to imagine themselves in their wildest fairytales… your hand in his and his in yours as a fleeting moment becomes a sealed promise of a lifelong loyalty. 

Breath completely taken away, you, yourself, almost fall prey to your own far-fetched dreams. 

“I thought I said we shouldn’t meet up anymore,” your forced mutters drag you from your short-lived reveries, “why did you bring me here?”

“You said we shouldn’t meet up anymore, yet here you are,” Jin chirps before cheering to himself under his breath once the key finally clicks into place, “yes! Old man must have purposely given me these rusty old keys.”

Crossing your arms, you retort, “I came because you said your close friend from home would be here, too.”

Turning around to face you with his back to the door and a hand on the golden knob, he raises a quizzical brow, “and… are you not my close friend from home?” 

“I thought you meant the other—”

“—this is my home, Y/N,” he says firmly, looking straight at you, “and I want my best friend to see me in my wedding suit before anyone else.” 

“But why me…?”

“Because I only care about your opinion.”

He answered without hesitation, but in your head you figure he must have forgotten about Youngji, the true spotlight of the show.

Gritting your teeth, a staredown begins between the two of you; but the longer you face those unequivocal looks of determination in his eyes, the hotter your cheeks become in the middle of a contrastingly chilly night.  

“Alright, fine.” 

“Thanks,” he gives you a small, lopsided smile before pushing the door open with his back and ushering you in with a slight bow, “ladies first.”

Your eyes roll but not for very long when you step foot into the store and your mouth falls agape. The ceiling is much higher than you had perceived from outside, the sides are lined with grand, wooden staircases that lead to a second floor where hundreds upon hundreds of white dresses and black suits find purchase along the hangers, and the click of your heels against the marble tiles of the entrance floor echo into the extravagant expanse. 

The wooden insulation of the store proves infallible when the door closes behind Jin and the shrewd air leaves you to a much more bearable surrounding. Standing affixed to the entrance, you watch as Jin strides toward the carpeted floor where a taupe curtain hanging from the ceiling drapes over a raised platform sits across its partner platform in the opposite of the room. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so enraptured by something aside from me,” Jin chuckles as he begins stripping the suit off of a black, velvety mannequin before pointing at the mannequin standing beside the opposite platform, “oh, why don’t you try on some dresses while I’m at it?” 

“What?” you scoff, finally taking a step onto the carpet. “First off, I never stared at you like that before. Second, why the hell would I do that? It’s your wedding, not mine.” 

“I asked the store owner for permission and picked a dress for you to try on,” he continues, finally stopping in the midst of unbuttoning his white, collared shirt when he looks up to find the fear in your eyes. “Hey, haven’t you always wanted to try one of these?”

“Yeah,” you laugh in disbelief because he actually listened to your past rambles, “but never under these circumstances.”

“C’mon, you never know if you’ll ever have a chance like this again,” he gestures once more when he notices the start of your contemplation, “c’mon, go on!”

You really don’t want to. It’s that nagging feeling of something going completely wrong tonight if you were to succumb and let yourself go. After all, your worst fear is yourself. It doesn’t feel right and you begin to wonder if it’s alright for you to hold onto this moment you’ve always dreamed about: dolling up and swearing your vows side by side with Jin. 

If you were to live out your fairytale, just for tonight, would you finally be able to sleep dreamlessly at night? 

“...fine,” you groan and storm across the room, tossing your purse into the ruby sofas and stepping onto the platform. Turning around to face a gleeful Jin, you’re about to scowl at him until your eyes flicker between the cheeky grin on that youthful face and those sculpted abdomen of his elevated by the lighting above. Cheeks flushing red, you gulp at the unseen sight before clutching the curtain in your hands and swinging it closed with a mumble, “and at least have some decency and use the curtains, God damn it…”

The freezing touch of your hands doesn't hold a candle to the heat of your face. Trying to calm your racing heart, you curse to yourself at the way he merely cackles at you and, even worse, the way your heart intensifies in response. 

“Yes, ma’am!” 

“...shut up,” you say more to yourself and your deafening heart.

The gown standing before you, however, is no help to your case either, for when you glance over the dress, the long train that could awe an entire room, the complimenting silhouette that doesn’t scream too over-the-top but enough to fulfill the little girl within you, and the classic lace sleeves that you’ve gushed over whilst skimming through magazines, you realize Jin had always been attentive even when he was stuffing his face with bread or even when he was being petty over an argument and you tried to rectify with incessant small talk. 

It’s at this moment that you acknowledge the rabbit hole you had just willingly fallen into and the impossibility of its towering escape.

“So,” Jin calls out to you as the sound of rustling clothes fill the silent air, “what do you want for your birthday tomorrow?”

“My birthday? Oh, right,” you slam palm to your forehead, having dwelled over the marriage and consequently forgetting your own birthday. “Uh, nothing really. I haven’t really thought about it this year.” 

“Really? You? Y/N? Not planning her own birthday?” he gasps. “Who are you and what did you do to Y/N?”

“Oh, shut up. With age comes other problems to deal with...”

...problems like you.

“C’mon,” he chuckles. “You have to have something. You can’t tell me you’ve gotten every single thing checked off of that old ‘birthday gift ideas’ list you gave me.”

“I mean… I wouldn’t say I’m very far from it and it’s not like you were actually going to give me everything I asked for. Say, what did I even have on that list?” your eyes wander to the towering curtains that envelop you as your hands reach behind to the buttons on your back. “A bowl of your tofu soup, some pocket money, a matching sweater, a pair of earrings, a necklace, and a… ring.” The word slips from your lips and it floats in the stagnant air before you can even do anything about it. His silence rings in your ears, so you quickly add in, “but I don’t want materialistic stuff like that anymore.” 

“...oh, really?” 

“Nope,” you heave a heavy sigh and pat the poofy material of the skirt down, “I think I’ve come to realize that… I just want to be loved. I don’t need a dress or a necklace or a ring…  you wouldn’t understand, but I don’t just want to hear those words. I want to feel them. I want to be loved.” 

But only by him.

A lingering silence drifts long enough for you to start panicking until, finally, he answers, “no, I understand.” 

“...well,” you quickly chirp as you fumble with the lacey material of your dress, “enough about me, what do you want for your big day, hm?”

“Why would I need a present from you?” he remarks. You can hear him finishing his final touches and you can barely stop your heart from leaping out of your chest. “You’ve given me enough already.”

“You mean I’ve given you enough earfuls and tears,” you retort, clutching onto the curtains as you shut your eyes to muster every courage within you. “Isn’t there anything I can give you? Anything you want?”

Counting down to yourself, the curtains and drawn open in one, swift swing; and when your eyelids flutter open, you find him standing on the platform across from you, dressed in a classic black and white suit with the curtains clutched in his hands like a mirror image of you. He glances over you from head to toe, as you do to him, until the both of you settle in each other’s gazes for what seems like an eternity, willingly lost and ever-so-enraptured.

You almost forget this isn’t actually your wedding.

“This,” he answers with a soft smile, “this is enough.”  

“...stop it.”

JIn frowns, “stop what?”

“Stop… looking at me like that,” you articulate, hands covering your bashful grin. “It’s making me feel self-conscious.” 

“Hey, it’s not my fault I have such a good eye at picking clothes for you!” he says whilst pointing an accusatory finger. “I guess 22 year old Jin had a pretty good sense of fashion after all.” 

“You picked this five years ago…?” 

The man shrugs but his high chin says otherwise regarding his humility, “I told you Kim Seokjin is a prepared man of his word.” Eyes peering across to wink at you, he continues a bit more seriously, “I might not be able to fulfill all of our promises, but this is the closest I can to it.” 

“Jin… you’re…” you laugh in disbelief, bashfully avoiding his intent gaze, “...you’re so incredibly stupid that I can feel it from all the way here.” 

“Oh, yeah?” he grins mischievously and takes a step toward you and off the platform. “How about now?”

“Stop it, don’t spread your stupidity to me.”

He spreads his arms out wide whilst taking another few steps forward, “why not? Aren’t we supposed to be together through thick and thin?”

“No, not really,” you adamantly shake your head amidst a hysterical fit of giggles, “don’t come any closer.” 

“Oh, no,” he feigns worry. Another footstep. “I can’t stop myself.” He approaches even closer. “The stupidity is spreading!” 

With him just a footstep away, you cower behind the shield of your hands, “stop it, stop looking at me like that—”

—and just as you squeal, his arms wrap around you to pull you into a tight embrace.

Like two lost puzzle pieces, his hands fit perfectly in the small of your back and his chin rests comfortably in the crook of your neck. His hair grazes against your burning cheeks. His scent envelops you into a rosy haze. He could probably feel the beat of your chest against his, but you wouldn’t know when you’re preoccupied by the thuds of his own. You had never been aware of the lonesome emptiness you’ve felt all these years until now, under the warmth of his touch that completes your other half. 

You almost forget to breathe until he takes a deep breath and lets out a slow, dreary sigh. 

“You are so beautiful.” 

Under any other circumstances, you would have smacked him for lying. Perhaps it’s the stir of the starry skies or the impending occasion or even the look he made on his way to you with a gaze that oozed with absolute adoration, but something tells you he’s being his genuine self tonight… and that’s what you fear the most. 

“You shouldn’t be saying that, Jin,” you say, stroking his head buried in your shoulder, “and you shouldn’t be looking at any women but Youngji with those eyes.” 

Whether he’s quietly reflecting or stubbornly disagreeing, Jin remains silent. His breath entangles with yours, syncing with the wavelengths that you two have been running for an ongoing seven years and, perhaps, beyond. 

He frustrates you to your wits’ end. There’s nothing he hasn’t made you question. At times, when you’re tossing and turning in bed and hoping for a way out of that cavern of a mind, you wish time could skip to a year in which the voices no longer haunt you at night; and yet, when you’re here buried in his arms, you would do anything to freeze and relish this fragment in time. 

It isn’t right. You two aren’t right and you know it isn’t right… but how do you deny yourself of the cure to those deep scars when he, himself, wishes to be downed? 

It takes everything in you to finally drop your hands from his locks to his shoulder. Just as you’re about to deny the tempting elixir, Jin lifts his head along with his gaze that now meets yours, “Y/N, I have something I need to tell you.”

“...y-yeah?” 

The windows to his soul twinkle underneath the dim chandeliers above. Those starry dark brown eyes simply take your breath away.

“My dad,” his voice quivers like the water that wells in his eyes; and when you know he’s about to bawl, you pat his head ever-so-endearingly. Gulping, he finds the courage to continue, “he’s sick.” 

“Oh... oh, Jin,” you murmur, quickly wiping the few tears that drop onto his flush cheeks before bringing him into another tight embrace. “I’m sorry.” 

“I only moved—” and that’s what cracks his buoyant front into a full on bawl  “—I only moved to take care of him!”

“I understand.” 

He shakes his head, “I didn’t want to abandon you!” 

“No, Jin, I know,” your voice is buried underneath his whimpers, “I’m sorry for saying that. I didn’t know. I’m sorry.” 

“I didn’t know things would turn out like this!” he cries, holding you even closer. “I didn’t know!” 

“It’s okay, Jin. Really, it’s okay. It’ll be okay.” 

“No, it won’t be okay,” his voice hitches in the midst of his hiccups, “my father is dying and now I’m walking down the aisle with a woman I don’t even love!” 

Your strokes come to a temporary stop because how could fate be so twisted? Who is it to decide whose time shall begin and whose time is up? You have to hold your breath along with the waterworks that sour your eyes. You can’t cry now. He needs your stability.

He needs you. 

“Did you…” you take a shaky breath, leaning back to watch him cover the messy state of his face, “did you tell your dad?”

“I-I couldn’t,” he stutters, voice muffled by his voice, “you know how long he’s been waiting for this.”

I know,” you ponder for a second before hesitating to continue, “...why didn’t you consider me?” 

“I—” his hiccup interrupts him as he roughly smears his tear-stained cheeks with his palms “—I thought you hated me. I didn’t think you would agree. I thought our promises were just a joke. But when you confessed that night, when you said you would fight for us—” his voice cracks again as he laughs at himself, eyes to the ground “—I thought damn, fuck, how did I mess up so hard? I should have fought for us. I’m so stupid—”

“—no you’re not—”

“—so fucking stupid!” 

His self-reprimanding curse echoes in the room. Each of his demeaning scorns inciting a fiery justice in you. 

“No,” you state, “you’re not stupid.” 

Without the dignity to face you, his hands clenched into fist and he continues with bangs shrouding his sorrowful eyes, “I’m sorry, Y/N. I hurt you—”

“—no, Jin, you did not—”

“—I messed us up—”

“—no, Jin, look at me, hey, look at me,” you place a finger under his chin to lift his spirits until those bloodshot eyes of his find refuge in yours. Smiling, you speak, “see? I’m okay. So what are you apologizing for?”  

“Aren’t you… mad?” 

“Mad? No, silly,” you laugh, wiping another tear. “Sad? Maybe.”

“See—”

“—sad because I wasn’t there by your side when you needed me… and maybe a bit sad that I won’t be the one holding you like this tomorrow,” you apologize with a soft smile over the latter jab that incites a wince from the boy. “Why didn’t you tell me about your father?” 

“I didn’t think it was that serious,” he hiccups, “and when I found out, I tried to call you but it didn’t go through.”

“Shit,” you curse under your breath, “I’m sorry.” 

“No,” he takes a deep breath to calm his high, “it’s not your fault.”

“And it’s not yours either,” you affirm, breaking out into a laugh when you take another look at his reddened eyes and dampened cheeks. “Look at you! Why are you looking like a mess on our wedding day, huh?! At least let us be ignorantly happy for one day!” 

“What…?” he frowns whilst hastily smearing every last evidence of his breakdown on his face. The result is an equally red, irritated skin across his cheeks. “What’re you talking about? Kim Seokjin never looks like a mess… hey, what’re you laughing at?!” 

“Look at your tie, idiot! What kind of a rich son are you if you can’t even tie it correctly? Come over here,” you say just as you grab the end of his necktie to pull him up onto the platform. With his necktie now at your eye-level, you begin to unravel whatever knot he had attempted. All the while, you can feel his gaze as he watches you do your thing, completely enamored. This time, it’s your turn to turn red. To distract yourself from the rising self-consciousness, you clear your throat, “call me whenever you’re going through a hard time, okay? I’ll give you my new number…”

The piece of fabric flails around into equally atrocious knots that Jin had previously created until you groan in frustration and disassemble everything. You had practiced this so many times while he was gone, foolishly believing it would come in handy the day he returned, but why does nothing ever work out the way you want it to? 

“I swear it worked last time I tried…”

Your best friend just watches silently, chuckling as you wrap the fabric around your own neck this time; and when he speaks, much steadier like the Jin you have always known, he looks you directly in the eye. “Youngji told me about your guys’ conversation.”

“Huh?” you pause as soon as your embarrassing declaration of love begins reciting itself in your head, but not even the resumed work of your hands could distract you from the ever-growing shade of red. “O-oh, that… what about it?” 

“I heard what you said about me.” 

“Yeah?” you hum nonchalantly, even though the trembling of your hands and the avoidance of your eyes from his give you away. “Well, did she tell you about all the complaints I made, too? About you being a stupid dork?”

“She did,” he utters before placing a finger below your chin to avert your attention to those dazzling works you desperately avoided, “but would you still be willing to marry this stupid dork?”  

“This isn’t even a real wedding,” you feign a frown under the spotlight of his intent gaze, “why are you asking me a question like that?”

“Sorry, I didn’t have the funds to hire a real priest.” 

“You don’t need to for a fake wedding.”

“I thought you said we should be ‘ignorantly happy for one day?’” 

The bantering just never stops, does it?

“Okay, well… to answer your question,” you mutter, eyes averting to the side, “under normal circumstances…”

“Under normal circumstances…” he repeats.

“Where you aren’t engaged…”

“Where I’m not engaged…”

“And your father approved of me…”

“And my father approved of you…”

“Then yes,” you say without hesitation, eyes returning to find a newfound comfort in his relieved gaze, “yes, I would marry you.” 

“And that’s why I love you,” Jin smiles, chuckling softly. “I’ll always want to marry you.”  

And just as a nearby clock tower strikes its church bells to signal the stroke of midnight, Jin grabs the end of your necktie and pulls you in to press his lips onto yours. The body of his warmth and the acceptance of an inevitable end to your paths serve as the last page of a book never to be read again; and yet, he holds himself close, refusing to let you go. 

But when the end nears and the magic of the bells resume time once again, the two of you pull away to catch your breaths. Forehead against yours, Jin gives you one last, fleeting kiss. 

“Happy birthday, Y/N.”

❀ ❀ ❀

Deja vu would be the perfect term to describe this feeling.  You can almost see yourself in the room of hundreds, stealing glances at the man from afar. It only takes one blink for you to relive the rollercoaster of jubilance and confessions and tears. In the split second of darkness, the past week flickers before you like a film reel: breaking down in the middle of the hallway right in front of Jin, staring bewilderedly at the large bouquet in the hand of a man at the office, confessing with tears that stain your face and sobs that conquer your voice, meeting the woman who had stolen your spot beside Jin, and holding him in your arms as he cries his heart out at the stroke of midnight. 

And just as quickly as the whirlwind of memories had taken you on a trek of time, your eyes flutter open to find yourself in another suffocating room of hundreds once again. 

Youngji [8:39 P.M.] Hey Y/N do you think you can visit me real quick? 

The glaring text on your phone screen glows in an otherwise dimly lit reception room. Thumb hovering over the screen, your mind goes blank. People pass by you, commotions and laughter fill every corner of the room, and you stand there frozen and affixed to the floor beside the table of food with a glass of red wine in your hands. 

“Hey, Y/N,” someone whispers into your ear and you immediately turn your phone off only to find Alex on her tiptoes, “what’s the matter?”

“Oh, um, nothing,” you respond under your breath, “it’s just that someone wants to talk to me.” 

“Well, you better hurry then,” she ushers you with a gripping hand on your left arm, “the ceremony is about to start anytime now.” 

“O-oh, okay,” you nod, allowing your footsteps to follow the momentum of her push. 

This isn’t exactly what you had planned, for the original plan involved your complete avoidance of the groom and bride, but it’s unsurprising that things never quite go your way. Nothing could quite topple you like last night’s revelation anyways. Taking a deep breath, you weave through the audience, wandering about the venue until you finally find yourself in front of a door with a “BRIDE WAITING ROOM” printed in gigantic black letters taped to it. 

Hesitantly, you knock, “hello? This is Y/N…? Youngji called for me—”

“—Y/N!” The wooden door swings wide open with a highly distressed Youngji hiding behind it. Before you can reply or even confirm the identity of the woman, her hands clutch yours and pull you into the room with a force unimaginable for a human of her size.  Practically lurching forward, a heap of air is knocked from your lungs just as the door slams closed. Coughs force their way through your throat, but Youngji wastes no time to rush to your side. “Y/N, this is an emergency! I need help!” 

“W—” you wheeze, peering up at her as you’re doubled over “—what in the world are you talking about?” 

“I don’t know,” her hands jitter as she paces back and forth, “I don’t know why I feel so… so nervous!”

“Hold on,” you frown, finally straightening your back, “that’s perfectly normal. It’s your wedding—”

“—please don’t say that word again,” she begins biting her freshly white-coated nails.

“What word? Normal? Wedding? Your—”

“—I can’t believe it’s my wedding…” she says repeatedly, hands flying to her head and disheveling her previously perfectly conditioned curls. She suddenly turns to face you, eyes wider than ever with a look that screams of an epiphany. “I-I don’t think I can go there. Y/N, I don’t think I can go out there!”

“What?!” you almost yell, flabbergasted. Recoiling from your outburst, you start much more softly this time. “Are you sure? I’m sure it’s just your nerves getting to you. You’ve been okay with it for at least a year, right?”

“Why?” her eyes widen to unprecedented diameters as she grabs your arm for support. “Is it because it’s too late? Do you think I should back out, Y/N?”

“What? No, no, no, calm down, follow me,” you shake your head, grasping her hand and guiding her to the chair in the center of the room where an entire photo shoot has been set up. Lowering yourself to a squat, you give her a squeeze as firm as the smile on your lips.  “Hey, you’ll be okay. It’s just the jitters. Everyone gets them. I’m sure Jin is freaking out in his room, too.”

“...okay,” she nods, pouting as her eyes lower to your hands that hold hers. Peering up at her from below, you can’t help but notice how beautiful she looks dolled up on this special occasion. From the extravagant poof of her princess gown to the gorgeous glow of the bride herself, you find yourself lost in a trance that burns with heart-panging jealousy. You almost miss her when she murmurs, “how are you so calm, Y/N?”

“Huh?” you raise a brow and laugh. “Why would I be nervous? I’m not the one getting married here.”  

“But… your best friend is getting married,” she shifts to get a clearer look of you but finds you with your eyes to the floor, “are you sure you’re okay with that?”

“Of… of course. I’m happy for him,” you say through barely parted lips and stand to your feet before making your way to the door. “It’s not exactly traditional, but do you want me to get Jin? Maybe he can calm you down—”

“—do you know why Jin agreed to this arrangement?” 

Freezing in your tracks, you throw a glance over your shoulder to meet her distraught gaze. 

“Why are you asking me that now?”

“Because,” she blurts, clearly without thinking as words fail to follow through, “because I want your blessing! I want you to be okay with it!” 

“Blessing...?” 

“Yes,” she nods. “I can live with marrying a man I don’t love because I know I’ll come around, but I don’t think I can live knowing I’ve broken your relationship with Jin.”

Your weight shifts from your left to your right but the force of burden weighs immeasurably heavier on your very being. There’s nothing that would have prepared you for her request. Preparation, however, proves unnecessary, for your mind runs on its own and the words come to you as if rehearsal is all it's ever done. 

“I don’t think I’m in the position to grant you permission. That’s your decision and Jin’s,” you say, “and if my blessing is what you’re asking for, then I can give you it as many times as it takes to convince you. But if you’re asking for me to be okay with it, then I’m sorry. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to give you that.” 

Those are your last parting words as you slump on the wall behind you and a heavy sigh is shared between the two women on opposite sides of the door. Head low like a woman unjustly ashamed for speaking her truth, you take a deep breath with those heavy shoulders that carry the weight of a woman who had essentially cursed the joining of two hands. Nevertheless, somehow, you persist to make your way through the halls just as the ceremony begins; but as the audience settles and the light dims, something tells you the guilt that intoxicates your blood would have a longer-lasting aftermath than you had first expected. 

“Hey,” Alex leans into you, whispering, “is it just me or does Jin seem really jittery?”

“...no,” you answer, making sure to keep yourself hushed amidst a room of seated spectators. From the second bench to the front, fortunately on the opposite side of where Jin’s parents sit in the front row, you get a clear view of Jin and Youngji in between the black silhouettes of a couple heads; but anyone in the room can tell the bright studio lights and elevated platform don’t help his constantly shuffling case. “I don’t think it’s just you.”

“I see… so both the groom and bride are getting cold feet, huh?” 

“Well,” you utter, quipping, “in Jin’s case, he’d probably just say he forgot to sleep with socks on.” 

Alex turns to you with sheer confusion across her furrowed brows, “huh?” 

But before Alex could inquire further, the priest clears his throat and begins the opening ceremony. The officiality of it all, a long-dreaded image of Jin standing by another woman’s side manifesting into reality, has you subconsciously sent into a frenzy. 

“Dear Beloved, we are gathered here today in the presence of these witnesses, to join Kim Seokjin and Heo Youngji in matrimony commended to be honorable among all…”

The clearing of his throat strikes once and hard against your chest. Each word that reverberates in the room echoes the vibrating pain in the blood pumped from a gaping wound. Your chest heaves and heaves and your lungs struggle to maintain composure, and while your breakdown may have gone unseen by the rest of the universe, you know for sure only two would catch sight of your state.

You and him. 

“...if there is any person who can show cause why they should not be joined together…”

The priest continues and the tension in the audience rises by the second of a stress-inducing prompt, but the moment Jin catches your eyes and the panic painted across it, his every attention remains on you. Guilt should’ve painted your expression now, having stolen the groom’s admiration from the rightful bride by his side, but all you can do is relish in a fleeting moment you deem the least this cruel world owed you. 

Maybe he feels the same way, because something catches in your throat like the hunch that has chills running down the nape of your neck. You don’t dare move an inch. You fear any movement would give you away, though you’re sure he already knew the second he met you halfway.

His eyes, those dazzling eyes that could single-handedly freeze any moment in time, they ask you for a permission only he could grant. 

“...let them speak now or forever hold their peace.” 

No one speaks but the thick air that engulfs every witness in the room is telling enough. Holding a shared, bated breath, everyone awaits and prays for the quick passing of this deafening silence. Your heart is pounding so hard you worry your passing out would be the one interruption to the ceremony, if not anything else. It takes everything in you to remain hidden, glued to the chair. You can hear every single movement in this room, the squeaking of a nearly retired bench, the rustling of clothes amidst a fidgeting audience, the anxious tapping of someone’s heels against the wooden floor, yet no one dares to speak now. 

The priest sighs a soft breath of relief. 

Everyone but you follows along. 

The priest clears his throat and pro—

“—I would like to speak.”

A loud gasp travels across the room. Every witness, including the priest himself, stares at the young man, wide-eyed. The knot in your throat inhibits you from following suit, but the hammer against your chest works harder than ever; because there he is, your best friend, standing boldly before the audience with a puffed chest and a tightened fist that brace for the repercussions. 

It all happens so suddenly, so swiftly. The strings that were left raveled now unraveled, the paths that were abandoned now explored, and the love of a lifetime whomst once bid you farewell now holds on with a determination that tells you they aren’t quite ready to let go, by happenstance or by conviction, everything falls into place. 

You had reprimanded yourself relentlessly for envisioning a moment like this and you truly believed this would be the worst case scenario, so why is it that only now, as your peering eyes are enamored by the sparkles in his, you find yourself smiling proudly and thinking to yourself… that’s your man. 

“Father, mother,” Jin turns to face his parents in the front row, declaring loudly and firmly, “I don’t want to marry someone I don’t love.” 

“What,” Alex shrills under her breath as she clutches your hands, “what is going on, Y/N?!”

Her voice doesn’t reach you and neither do her cold, nudging hands. The ongoing commotion around the room are like white noise in your background. You can’t even spare a second of your attention to the picturesque vision before you, the man who fights not for you but for the two of you.

Jin bows, head hanging low to his parents and the audience, “I’m sorry for saying this too late.” 

Everybody watches as his mother attempts to hold her husband in place. All is in vein, however, when one look of the baffled expression on her husband’s face conveys enough to everyone of the mayhem that is soon to ensue. He rips her grip apart from his arm and storms to his feet, pointing a finger at his apologetic son.

“W—” he struggles to find his breath “—what are you saying? You said you were okay with this just last week!”

“I did,” Jin affirms with his head still hanging low, “I thought I was okay with it until this week.” 

“How—”

“—honey…” the mother murmurs.

“No, changing your mind is one thing, but changing it at the very last second is another,” his father shakes his head, yanking his hand and stumbling on his feet before his distraught son could lend a helping hand. “Did I teach you to inconvenience others like this? Do you know how much trouble you’re causing Youngji and her family?”

“I do,” he says. “I’m sorry.”

His father grunts, “don’t you see, Seokjin? ‘Sorry’ can’t fix everything—”

“—actually, Mr. Kim, it’s not just Jin,” Youngji bounces to Jin’s side then pivots to bow to her parents who sit in the row before you, “I, too, don’t want to marry anyone until I really know them.” 

Physically, the spotlight remains affixed to the stage. Mentally, it feels as though everyone’s attention is gradually creeping its way toward you. It takes everything in you and the grip of Alex’s hands not to run from the prying eyes. 

“What?” their parents gasp. “Didn’t you say you were okay with it if it were Jin?”

“I did!” she insists, suddenly retracting. “I did, until…”

“I’m sorry,” Jin lifts his head to turn to Youngji’s parents before bowing once again, “this is all my fault.”

“No, no, you wouldn’t do this... tell me, son,” his father takes a step toward the stage, beckoning for an explanation, “tell me who did this to you?” 

Jin lifts his head, brow furrowing and lips thinning as he chooses to remain silent to his father’s question. Suddenly, it’s everyone’s duty to catch the perpetrator. The audience begins craning their neck every which way to skim over the possible candidates. Your heart sends threatening waves of pain that foreshadow the inevitable chaos you’re about to be dragged into. 

You can barely move from staring at the floor in between the groom and bride but you can spot the gradual direction of his mother’s eyes making its way toward you… and when they finally spot you, a lightbulb flashing across her eyes the second you make the lethal mistake of meeting her gaze for the first time in many years, it’s as though her son’s rebellion is the only thing that makes sense in this universe. 

Only naturally, his father catches onto his partner’s maternal instincts along with the rest of the crowd as their diverged attention converges, one head turning after another, to stare you down—some with awe plastered across their jealous front, some with ghastly colors than drain their face of blood. 

“Is that… you, Y/N?” his father’s voice echoes in the room. “Seokjin, don’t tell me…”

“No, father!” Jin jumps in, holding up a defensive pair of hands as he attempts to quell the fiery in his father’s temper. Wide-eyed and panicked, he glances between you and his father. “It isn’t her fault. I swear. I”ll explain—”

“—don’t tell me you’re going through all this trouble for a childish crush from five years ago?” 

A loud shriek began the chaos the second Jin’s father exploded, lurching forward with a vexing fist. Everyone in the front rows jump to their feet to hold him back, whereas people in the back rows stand to their tiptoes to get a better view of the climactic show, which includes a once-to-be-groom insisting his father punishes him and a once-to-be-bride slapping her ex-partner in the head for his submission. 

People are hysterically laughing, crying, screaming, yelling, fighting, but you sit there, frozen and petrified, until a hand shakes your entire being to your feet. 

“Y/N, Y/N, God damn it Y/N, earth to Y/N!” Alex raises her hand, just about to give you one hard slap to the cheek when you suddenly flinch awake. She then hastily pushes you toward the door in the corner of the room whilst everyone is too distracted to notice your discreet escape. She looks you directly in the eye, “you need to run before things get too crazy. I’ll handle things here for now.” 

“But Alex, I’m at fault here—”

“—yes, I mean, maybe,” she corrects herself with the shake of her head, “but you being here doesn’t help matters. I’ll help Jin and Youngji.”

“But—”

“—now go,” she starts your momentum with an encouraging push, “go!”

Nodding, you begin your long trek of the night. You run and you run and you run. Your mind runs blank but your feet run a mind of its own. You sprint down the dimly lit streets, you pay no mind to the traffic lights of endlessly empty streets, and your hair twirls in the wind that impedes your speed down the hills. Your surroundings become a blur as your arms swing desperately, your chest heaves incessantly, your eyes sting with tears, and your lips spill anguished sounds of incoherency until somehow, under the sway of the town’s cold spring air and your flux of emotions, you find yourself in a familiar street of your greatest dreams. 

Depleted of gas, your feet stumble into a trot that has your knee nearly buckling, which then turns into a jog that then drifts into an untroubled walk in which your lungs try to catch up and your mind is scrambling at a hundred miles per hour but you, yourself, have gone elsewhere. 

The luminescence of the full moon is blinding but all the more soothing as you navigate your way through this street you’ve walked one too many times before. For some reason, perhaps out of habit or a hope for something waiting at the end of the tunnel, you begin to count each passing light post. Seven fluorescent lights, you count, seven lights resembling the rays of moonlight until you finally reach your old acquaintance of many years at the corner of the street. 

Leaning your head back to stare at the familiar white text on a green sign post, you smile at the homely sight. 

CHERRY BLOSSOM AVE

A comforting breeze blows by you, the branches above you rustle in the wind, and the cherry petals from your old pal flutter into the air to envelop you in a solace you had long sought but failed to obtain. It’s like the calm after a storm. Not quite disconnected from the string that loops around your fourth finger to those of another man’s—no, you couldn’t unravel it after all this heartache—but at least away from the prying eyes that could tear you apart and away from the people who whispered gossip of matters they had none in. 

Hours seem to pass in the clouds that retire to reveal patches of new twinkling ornaments. You would have believed it if someone were to tell you all control of time lies within the blink of your eyes. The silence was calming initially; but the longer you stand here and the more the numbness begins to fade, the more you become aware of your lonesome circumstances. 

The silence is deafening. It knows your greatest fears and your innermost thoughts. You can’t handle it. You can’t bear the thought of being left alone to that voice in your head. 

You have to go. 

Where? 

You don’t know. You just know you have to go somewhere. You can envision all the places you can run to but all the roads lead you to one destination. Yes, anywhere would be fine, anywhere that leads you to him. 

“This marks the second time you’ve ever been so enraptured by something other than me.” 

Whirling around, seconds seem to become milliseconds and gravity becomes a law unbeknownst to earth, for you can’t believe the sight your eyes lay upon. There he is, standing by the tree just a few meters away with a loosened necktie and disheveled hair, almost as if a pitiful albeit wondrous mirage crafted by your shoddy prayers to the moon above. 

“Hey dummy,” he simply utters, taking a step or two toward you before poking your forehead, “what? Why’re you staring at me like I’m a ghost?” 

“What?” you manage to say under your breath. “I’m not staring…”

“I was just joking, you know?” he chuckles. “I wouldn’t be jealous over a street post. Psh, I’m not that dumb—”

“—why…” you frown when he quirks a brow, “why are you here? How are you here?”

“Oh no, she’s gone crazy,” Jin laughs at the stupefied look you give him. “At least an hour or two has passed since you left. Somehow, I managed to sit my father down and explain myself.” 

“And… what did he say?” your hands begin fidgeting. “He must hate me, doesn’t he…”

“I wouldn’t say ‘hate,’ per se… he’s perfectly okay with you. In fact, he likes you, really. He’s just mad at how things happened. After he calmed down, though, he understood where I was coming from.” 

Cautiously, you peek at those eyes that peer down at yours, “and your mother…?”

“She said she saw it coming from a mile away. Apparently she saw us arguing at the engagement party and knew right away,” Jin purses his lips. “Psh, yeah, as if I’m that easy to read.” 

Allowing yourself the smallest of laughs, you still can’t seem to rid yourself of that panging guilt. “And… what about Youngji?” 

Jin stares intently at your expression before cracking a smile and chuckling, ruffling your hair, “don’t go crying on me now, Y/N. Don’t worry about it. I’ll take care of everything.” 

“But I just,” your voice cracks, “I just hate myself for ruining everything for everyone—”

“—hey,” he cups his fingers underneath your chin to lift your gaze to his, “you did not ruin anything for anyone. I did this. I chose to fight for us.” 

Hesitantly, you nod and he smiles in response. 

“Youngji’s still explaining to her family right now. She told me to find you and Alex told me you would probably here.” 

Frowning, you mutter to yourself, “how did she know…?” 

“Well,” Jin drops his hand from your chin to raise them in the air, “we did promise to swear our wedding vows here, didn’t we?” 

“So what?” you deadpan. “You’re gonna marry me now after all this mess?” 

“I know you really want to marry me as soon as possible, but I think I’m gonna have to take a break from weddings for now.” 

Rolling your eyes, you mumble, “ditto.”

“But hey, I may have already broken the third promise,” one corner of his lips curve into an apologetic smile before he shrugs, “but that doesn’t mean I can’t marry you in the future! Plus, I may or may not have promised my father I would marry you in the near future to make up for it, so...” 

Scoffing, you gawk, “and who said I would marry you?” 

“Who wouldn’t marry me?!” 

The two of you stare at each other in silence, but the mirrored grin that stretches across your lips are undeniable. Soon enough, a loud fit of giggles and cackles fill the air. It happens all too quickly. The banters come to you like second nature, the conversation flows like a river through time, and somehow you find yourself lying beside him on the blazer he had laid out on the grassy hill and star-gazing for hours on end. 

It’s almost like you’ve seen this all before, just five years aged. 

“So,” Jin speaks, “how’s your birthday been?” 

“Oh, shut the hell up.” 

“What?” he cackles, getting up to lean on his arm whilst hovering you. “You know it’s not too late to tell me what you want for your birthday!” 

“I already told you,” you narrow your eyes at him, “I wasn’t joking when I said what I said.” 

Jin smiles, “in that case…”

He leans in to diminish the distance between his lips and yours. A lulling zephyr blows gently on the cherry petals as you close your eyes and you can picture the way they gracefully descend upon the two lovers below. Having witnessed the unforeseeable promises from start to finish, it’s almost as though an old accomplice was applauding a long-awaited finale. 

And when he finally pulls away, eyelids fluttering open just as yours do, he speaks, “happy birthday.” 

“What was that for?” you giggle. 

Jin’s mouth falls agape, “I’m giving you what you wanted for your birthday!”

“Well,” you purse your lips, “where’s my ring to confirm it then?”

“After all this time, do you really need a ring at this point to confirm my love for you?” Jin rolls his eyes. “You know I’ll always want to be by your side, married or not.” 

A fit of laughs escape you as your hand reaches up to squeeze his cheeks, “I know, I know. I’m just joking.”

“Well, good, cause I’m bankrupt at the moment,” Jin sighs, plopping back onto the grass beside you. A momentary silence passes before he turns his head to look at you, “just to make sure, you said you wanted love, right?” 

Turning to meet those sparkles in his gaze, you answer, “yeah?”

“You said you wanted to feel love, right?” 

Your grin grows wider by the second, “yeah?” 

“Well,” he says, “do you feel it?” 

“I do,” you answer. “What about you? Do you feel it?”

The vows hold a truth much closer to his heart this time around, and he smiles as he swears...

“I do, too.” 

[messwriting]

THE SMUT PILE SECRET SANTA

Golden Eyes

Demon!Kuroo Tetsurou x Female Reader  

Rating: E for explicit | Don’t read this if under eighteen.

Note: HOE HOE HOE INDEED! HAHAHAHA 

This is my secret santa gift for my dear elf Alisha -- @rivendell101​! I do hope you enjoy, I just tried to channel all of Kuroo’s wicked energy into this and sprinkled it with our beloved monsterfucking. Sorry for all the questions, I just wanted to surprise you but also include only things you’d like. ;-; Hope you enjoy and MERRY SMUTMAS <3

Big thanks and lots of kisses to my dear Tay @deathcab4daddy who read this, betaed, and said it wasn't the train wreck I thought it was 😂🥺😘💕

Warnings: This is loosely inspired by the manhwa DEAR DOOR, by Pluto, from which the art above is also from (Satan is fucking hot)! Monsterfucking - Demon. Use of tongue and tail in a very uh naughty way. Magic makes you horny at some point (tho i don’t think is dub-con?), but just to be sure Magic Manipulation. Assplay with tongue and finger penetration. Denials, oh so many denials. Sprinkle of spanking. Soft pain play. Overstim. Oral sex. Rough sex. CHOKING. BITING. MARKING. Demon uhhhh lure? aijaisajisj He’s seducing you with his devilish powers. CORRUPTION. RELIGIOUS BLASPHEMY (sorry jesus).

Word count: ~7.4k. I can’t write anything short, why?!

“So… you’re a demon?” You ask, weirdly not completely panicking over the fact that this brick wall of a man showed up out of nowhere in the middle of your living room as if this were just another Sunday night. The stranger smiles your way with a lopsided grin and the shivers that run through your body seem to support his affirmation.

“Did the horns give it away?” The dark-haired demon asks, with a smile that could make him the single male model of some sin’s propaganda. Your eyes flick to his tail, long and thick, moving calmly in waves behind him, and come up to the unbelievably wide black wings sprouting from his back and threatening to blow a hole in your ceiling. 

“Sure,” You say while your eyes come back to his face, taking a second look at the long, twisted black horns sprouting from his high forehead and mixing with his thick raven hair. “Let’s say it’s the horns.”

He snickers but his golden stare is very much sharp on you. Even before it pinned you in place you had found that your legs had begrudgingly refused to move in front of the massive presence in your living room. 

“You’re an interesting little thing, aren’t you?” He muses out loud, his arms crossing in front of his body while one hand cradles his own face while he looks down at you. The gold irises glint in the dark like a beacon, the small crystal-like black pupil like that of a wild animal. “Normally people would have been screaming by now. Or passing out. Maybe running.” He doesn’t move from where he stands, but his sentient tail floats over to you, lightly caressing the side of your face as a child stroking their pet; it moves under your chin, over your jaw and cheekbone, pats your hair back, and comes to circle your throat. 

It doesn’t squeeze -- but the threat is pretty much clear.

“I don’t think my legs can move.” You tell him in a breathless voice, panic eating away at the corners of your sanity the more you stare at the insanity in front of you. A monstrosity of man with a tail and wings to crown it swaying in your living room as if it’s all okay, as if this is real life. You shudder in place, a whole-body wave of dread that moves along your body and makes you tremble as all the hair on your being stands in place. He grins down at you, wicked and pretty, a cheshire air of mischief in the way his golden irises glint in the dark background of his eyes and mingle with the dim lit room to go with the roll of white pearls of sharp-looking teeth in his mouth.

“Am I dreaming?” Your thoughts escape from your lips in a breath as his tail grounds you to reality, burning hot and heavy around your neck. It contrasts awkwardly with the image in front of you, which your brain keeps trying to deny as true, but the weight of his tail pulls you from the edge of disbelief and pins you in place, your limbs turning cold as you feel unable to move. “Or am I going insane, somehow?”

“Do you think your brain is failing you, little one?”

“Well, seems like the logical reason why there’s a winged man in my living room. With horns and-- a tail.” Your voice stops and you gulp right before your eyes snap once again to his devilish black and golden eyes. “Wait. Are you a demon? Is… a demon in my living room?” The more you speak the least sense it makes. The thing in front of you seems to be very amused by the twinges of panic and disbelief coloring your voice and expression. “Why?”

He smirks and his wings do a fluttering thing before they curve inside his back, two massive black things even when they’re closed. “Must be your lucky day.”

You snort even through your scared haze. “Not exactly what one thinks when considering demons.”

“Ah, bad rep.” Kuroo says and he floats as if he’s sitting on a chair, his legs crossing as he supports an elbow on his thigh and his face on his hand. It’s both parts unnerving and enthralling, and you’re struck with the fact of how big he is once again. “God’s marketing team is hella good. We get the rep for everything going on now-- the crops died? Oh, the devil. Psycho kid? Demoniac. Fucked up government? Send from hell. Sex? Devilish.” He sighs, his pretty lips jutting in a pout as his beautiful face falls into a tired mask. “It’s tiresome to be the poster-boys to all things wicked.”

“Well, seems like you do the part just fine.” You hide yourself through some small sarcasm, as you grumble the remark.

“Hah.” His sharp teeth flash in the dark at the barked laugh, a gasped sound as if he truly found your remark funny. “We get used to it,” He nods your way and then shrugs, a never-leaving smirk on his lips. “And I like the style.”

“Sure,” you say, despite the clear unconvinced tone of your voice as your eyebrows shut up slowly, eating the distance from your hairline until you blink and tiptoe around your next words, “not to be rude, Mr. Demon--”

“Call me Kuroo.” He cuts you off charmingly, as one would in flirting; a playful arch in his brows as his smile spreads just that bit more over his face. You just now realize the appeasing traces of it, the sharp angle of his jaw, the high of his square cheekbones, and the elegant line of his nose; then your eyes fly over the protruding circles of his horns, and your eyes go round almost involuntarily. 

“Okay…” It breaches your lips along with a puff of breath. You blink a few times before continuing, still doubting your own eyes as they thread over the massive monster in front of you. You wonder if he’d look better if he’s bent to your height, but then again that wouldn’t do much about those broad shoulders, engulfing your wall where he stands. “Not to be rude, Mr. Kuroo, but…” you steady yourself with a deep breath before continuing, your hand flying to press against your eyes before you can reopen then and see the exact same thing from before -- a demon in your house. “What the fuck you’re doing here, exactly?” 

He smiles, pleased with your cussing, apparently. Then his eyes turn focused, predatory,  and they’re locked on you.

“I’ve come to offer a deal, little one.”

“A deal?” You parrot, lost in the pull of those golden eyes.

“Yes,” Kuroo smirks, lips splitting unnaturally over sharp canines. He keeps floating in his position, face supported on a big, clawed, hand. “And a quite good one, too.” 

“You… You’re at my home, to offer me a deal, right after the small rant on Devil’s bad marketing.” You list the things, doubt thick in your voice.

Kuroo smiles, but it looks wrong. “Yes, dear.” 

“Okay,” You risk, though it comes out as a question. Kuroo seems pleased, though. “Go ahead, I guess?”

“I need something from you.”

“Oh shit, is this the soul thing?” Your eyes widened again, hands coming to stand protectively in front of you even as you doubt you could do much to fend him off if he wanted to do you harm. “I’ve seen Supernatural, I’m not selling my fucking soul okay?!”

“Chill, kitten, I don’t really mind your soul.” He’s rather nonchalant, golden eyes completing a circle along his eyeballs before they fall once again on you while Kuroo comes out from his floating position to pace calmly over to you. Then, his sharp teeth split his face wickedly in two, an alluring characteristic in the way his lips form an overconfident grin as he bends over you in your place on the couch. “It’s your body I’m interested in.”

“My… body?” 

“Have you ever heard of hell portals?” His face engulfs your line of vision as his tail angles your head back to look up at him, a clawed finger gliding over your jawline at that.

“No? Should I? Who do you think I am to know about hell doors?” It happens again, your thoughts slipping through your lips at the same rate as you think them, the sarcastic tone of your mind also dripping out much as if that had been your intention all along. 

He seems rather happy at that, too.You wonder if he’s prying the truth from you somehow. “Well, you’re one.”

“What?” You ask, stupidly, as his face gets further from you and he straightens back into his full height.

“A door, to hell.” Kuroo finishes, cheerfully. It looks, once again, wrong on his face, as if it's more of a threat than a joke. 

 The seconds pass by as falling rocks over metal, loud and rattling, a restless moment in which you keep staring at the monster --demon-- face and even as his horns stay in place and his curved wings twitch, it stills feels wholly detached from reality; an insane, out of this plane moment in which you doubt your whole being - your eyes and your ears and your brain and your skin, where the weight and warmth of his tail still surrounds your neck.

“Now I know I’m losing my mind.” You murmur to yourself as you can’t make peace between reality and, well, this reality. 

“Ah, you humans are such disbelievers. I’m here in front of you, saying you’re a portal, and you still doubt your own eyes as if they’re the origin of your offense.” Kuroo mocks you, crossing his arms in front of his body and for a second your eyes linger on the blackness of his clawed hands, the weird way they’re shaped as if something is enveloping them, elongating claws on the point of his fingers with the color of a moonless night. Still, the acidic tone in his voice makes you perk up with infuriating annoyance, and it seeps from you at the same rate as it fills you. 

“Well, sorry if it’s hard for me to believe I’m a fucking hell portal.” You sass him, fiery eyes closing on gold. It’s even more annoying that he smiles through your taunt. “Ten minutes ago I didn’t even believed in hell.”

“You can keep doubting if you want. Aren’t you doing so even when you see me here? All I need is passage and then you’ll be free to doubt once again,” his eyes glow brighter as he closes in on yours in a way that has you swaying in place, a vexatious air around him that’s unmistakable; but then again he is a demon, so maybe that’s just the norm. “That is… if you want.”

A shiver runs down your spine at the promise in his voice, and your own trembles when you ask, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“That this can be a one-time thing -- or not.” 

You blink, a bit lost. 

“What’s this, exactly?” Your brain pulses in pain at the quantity of information it has to make sense and still try to understand. It’s too much and soon you’re pressing your hands on your face in frustration, “Dude, you’re not making sense.”

“It’s easy.” Kuroo says and suddenly you’re yanked up by thin air, floating in front of his fingers at his will as he twirls your body in the air as if you’re some sick kind of roulette. “Inside you, there’s a portal. I’ll activate it, and go to hell. In exchange, I’ll give you something.” As he speaks, clawed hands slowly and maliciously thread over the valley of your breasts and then down your middle, his golden eyes like a lighthouse to your wandering attention. “Something I know you desire, but you may not even know so. May not even accept yourself.” As his fingers approach the appex of your sex, you’re rounded in the air abruptly and set right on your feet in front of him, safe and sound and dizzy, feeling like prey to those eyes. “It may be this single time, or, if you accept my deal, it can be more.”

You breathe some big gulps of air before speaking in a wavering voice, “Something I wish? And you won’t tell me what that would be?”

“Essentially, you know. You just may be in… denial.” His eyes flash that golden glint once again, twirling molten pools of liquid sun on his face. Their constant, slow motion never-ending circles seeping inside your consciousness, making your mind blank, slowly flowing into a haze in which you feel lost but safe; warmth flowing from it over you as if you’re being dipped in melted honey, weighted down but comfortable, as moving against warm waves in a tropic beach. 

It tips from your mouth as you’re swimming in the molten pools of gold, pulled out from your body as the warm breath from your lungs, heated and pliant. “Okay.”

The spell crashes as his grin spreads through his face, the self-satisfied smirk of a cat who got its prey. Just as you’re burning in embarrassment and ready to cancel whatever that was you just said yes to, a sudden wave of warmth spreads from your face to your feet, your hair undulating at the force it hits you, and travelling so quickly you can feel the way your toes curve while a buzz crosses them, a pleasant but foreign thrill settling in your bones. You send him a nasty glare. 

“The fuck have you done to me?”

“Me? Nothing, kitten.” Kuroo tells you but everything from his expression, to his stance and the fucking satisfied smirk he sports tell you it’s a lie. Your glare turns worse. His lips are curved up in a telling manner but he concedes with a tilt of his head.  “I just lowered your inhibitions, relax.”

“Why would you do that?” The questions zap from your mouth just as you think it, and in a fleeting thought you wonder if that isn’t exactly what he meant. 

“I told you, I’m going to give you what you want.” Kuroo says as he stops in front of you, a sexy, powerful sway in the way he moves and towers over you that you can’t help but appreciate. “But I need you to accept your darker wishes,” It’s a murmur, raspy in his deep voice, and you breathe the words in as the indecent, luscious feeling swell inside your being and seems to find it’s home in your chest-- and drip from your sex. “And then embrace me.”

“I don’t want you.” You tell him, but it comes breathless, weak, and as Kuroo’s golden eyes pierce yours, you can feel as he pinpoints your lie. 

“Then let’s change that, shall we?” 

He wastes no time in maneuvering you into his arms, pulling you through thin air until his feral hands close around your middle and neck. Kuroo tilts your head back while grazing a single clawed finger over your pulse-point and up to your jawline, and then his breathing comes loud and misty against your bared skin. 

“Wait--” You plead as your breath comes in long puffs and when you wet your lips before continuing, a freakishly long, wet and hot tongue comes to lick a big stripe of your skin and you yelp loudly, “-- the fuck!” 

Kuroo, on the other hand, literally hums approvingly and brings his nose to glide over your skin, soft breathing as his hands pull you closer into his massive chest. You realize now, at the proximity,  just how big and broad he is, somehow between terrifying and uncanningly acceptable. 

His body runs hot, the temperature difference between yours quite clear when your skin feels so heated by his touch, clothes you found nice now feeling constricting the more of you that touches him. 

The planes of his chest are hard and toned, lean muscle and strength as he moves you up without effort, your feet dangling way above the ground and still no hint of struggle as he supports your weight. As you get closer, those yellow irises centered in black globes seem to pry inside your mind, big and all encompassing; it makes something coil in your chest, much like panic but tame as agitation.

“Wait--” You breathe out and look down, shocked at the distance you found yourself from the ground. Something crawls from your chest as a distressed groan, “I--” 

Kuroo tilts your head back and -- not without sending you a smirk -- delves down to close your lips together.

Whatever you were expecting, it wasn’t this -- you’re swept away by the kiss, amazed at how well your mouths work together, how perfectly plush and soft his thin lips feel on yours, how pleasing the motions of his tongue are against yours, how tasteful his movements are, and before long, you’re breaking the kiss but because you need to breathe, to pull some air inside yourself to battle the haze settling in your mind.  

It does nothing to aid you though.

Your body feels achingly flushed, avid, weirdly pliant and it is with mild surprise that you feel yourself drooling inside your panties. Something tells you to be indignant, to kick him, to bite and claw, but instead you’re sighing the weakest of noises, spiralling back to his expert lips, falling deeper inside the slow seduction that this demon offers.

Kuroo moves you calmly, his big, searing hot hands threading across your body and working goosebumps in it’s trail even as all he does is touch you over your clothes. Your hands, previously abandoned by the side of your body start to move up his body, spreading your small palms over his chest, and instead of pushing him off, you’re pulling him closer, opening your mouth wider, your legs hiking over his side as if you’re begging for the moment he’ll pick you up.

“Hmm, what a nice little thing you are.” Kuroo murmurs over your lips, taking in the wrecked expression you sport with just a kiss. “So honest, too.” His claws glide over your thigh, hiked on his side. It doesn’t hurt, but the feeling of something sharp sliding against your skin makes your heart rate pick up and your panties grow wetter.

“You’ll like this too, kitten, don’t worry.” His syrupy voice enchants you as he hooks a razor-sharp claw on the side of your shorts, threads up slowly and precise until the ripping sound breaks through your haze. When you look down, your hooded eyes turn wide, taking in the fact he just ripped your shorts and how easily they slide to the ground once they’re free from your hiked leg. The panties stay, but they’re not exactly much. 

“Hey!” You turn to look up at him, puffed cheeks in indignation, and one of his hands yanks your head back, angling your body in a arch as his other hand glides over your thigh to your lower belly, sharp thumb swiftly climbing up your body and with such, ripping your comfy t-shirt. The feeling of something scratching along your middle and the valley of your breasts make your breathing catch up on your lungs, too afraid it will press enough to hurt if you move. You never knew a menace could be this seductive.

Still, the anticipation coils inside you, pours from between your legs as your skin feels too small to hold all the feelings cursing to you, your breasts heavy and your lips falling open in a breath that Kuroo drinks from your lips, attentive and dedicated as his tongue comes out and slides over your lips.

His eyes glint in the dark, sharp and focused. 

“You know what? I think I’ll like you.”

 The air feels cold on your heated skin, especially when he holds you so close. Small trembles pass through your frame as you melt inside his kiss, falling deeper inside the pleasure he offers you and Kuroo barely started. Your nipples perk up without attention and when his rough palm rolls over them, their new-found sensitivity makes it impossible for you to not let out a sound. It’s something meek and surprised, but Kuroo seems proud of it and decided to pull more out of you. 

Magically, you’re yanked up, floating until your middle is at the height of his neck. 

“Hey! What are you doing?” Your head is millimeters from hitting the ceiling, your hands touching it as a way to protect yourself, you throw a nasty glare down at his face just for him to make a half-circle in the air and your upper body be launched behind. 

“No!” You’re laying on thin air -- your heart beating so fast your blood pulses in your head as you look over your shoulder and notices just how impossible is the situation going on, where you’re levitating a few meters from the ground. 

If he stops now, would you go down crashing? Would you die from such a fall? Questions swirl in your mind enough for you to forget whats going on - the way a sharp claw swiftly cuts the side of your panties - until something wet, firm and long prods on your dripping folds.

“What--” Your first action is to hitch your neck up so you can confirm that it is what you think it is, and, granted, Kuroo is slowly prying you open, his huge tongue threading on your most sensitive parts. As he laps a long stripe down your pussy, he looks up at you in flashing gold, seeming extremely pleased. 

Kuroo winks at you, depraved.

Your blood is rushing through your veins at such a haste that you feel dizzy, and your whole body is fervent as something very loud breaks through your lips as Kuroo’s tongue moves and presses on your slit, circles your clit, and moves in serpentine movements along your puffy cunt. 

You didn’t realize before how the texture of his tongue was a bit rugged but now you’re suffering the full extent of its benefits as he eats you out sloppily, enough that you’re dripping down on the carpet as his monstrously long and dexterous tongue plays with your cunt as if that’s his sole mission on earth. Kuroo hums against your clit, makes your whole body tremble with it, and at some point, he manages to press his tongue flat against your clit and still reach enough that it dips softly inside your entrance, slowly and deliciously prying the inner ring of your sex open, then broader.

You can’t help the noises falling from your lips and when one of his rough, clawed hands close around your breast, the pressure inside you peaks and you’re panicking at how close you are to your first orgasm, from his tongue alone, at an impossible long and sentient… demon tongue. 

But he retreats just as your mouth falls open, your throat constricted by the scream that instead becomes an indignated gasp. “Fuck--! I was--”

“Hmmm, I know.” Kuroo answers you, his hands coming to hold your thighs open as you tremble from the effort. His thumb pulls your cunt lips apart and his golden eyes glint, fierce and pleased at the same time. “Aren’t you an interesting plaything? Skyrocketing into pleasure head first when I was just getting a taste.” He licks his lips, his canines making an appearance as his ridiculous long tongue cleans his face and chin where your juices have leaked to. 

His grin should be illegal. “Delicious, by the way. But I’m not ready to end this so fast.”

“End this… fast?” You ask, still having difficulty in thinking straight when you’re floating up in the air with your legs spread open in front of his face, his thumbs spreading you open as if you’re his meal and he likes to play before eating.

“Maybe we should go somewhere more comfortable.” Kuroo muses out loud and before you can blink you’re falling, screaming in your surprise until you bounce on the comfortable cushion of your bed. The air is knocked out of you in a oof, but Kuroo just looks down at you happily, his smile still looking mischievous as if that’s his whole personality trait.

You know what, maybe it is.

“Warn a girl.” You tell him, and he winks your way, just as he pulls your naked body to the edge of the bed.

“Consider yourself warned: i’m about to eat you up.”

His massive hands engulf you and arch your body into his eager mouth, where his tongue lavish at your sex in a way that has you feeling as if they everywhere and at the same time. The muscle is thick and long, firm as it presses from your entrance to your clit, as it rounds your sensitive spot and slithers down through your pussy lips, slurping it with his lips as his wicked tongue never stops its prodding.

One of his hands circles your body, closes around your breast and tweeks your hard nipple between his thumb and forefinger, painfully, deliciously, something obscene curling inside you at the way the feelings mix, the pain and the bliss and it doesn’t help that Kuroo moves his mouth to the sensitive and fragile skin of your inner thighs and build a whole trail of bite marks and throbbing hickeys. 

Something firm, large and hot slither up your body, circling a breast but finding it’s home at a circle around your neck -- his tail -- and the more vocal you become, the more it seems to close around your throat, your heart beating on your fingertips as they claw at anything of Kuroo’s you can reach, hazy and breathless at the way he discloses your wicked desires so plainly, the way his every move seems to discover layer after thick layer of temptations that you have hidden so deep with partners before.

“Such a pretty little thing you are,” Kuroo coos to you when he presses a thick finger past the tight ring of your cunt. “So honest and eager,” It moves, prods, another one joins and soon they’re scissoring against your walls, opening your tender flesh so he can sink himself in further. 

The mere thought has you moaning out loud -- unbelievable and yet, you feel how your arousal drips from your cunt to your thighs.

 “Ahhhh~” Kuroo exhales as his tongue laps a long stripe of your juices. “So pure.” He says against your pussy lips, kissing them and then letting his long tongue slide further until it prods between the cheeks of your ass, immediately falling into circular motions on the furl of muscle. You yelp but midway it becomes an embarrassing moan. “This just makes me wanna ruin you more.”

It’s too much -- he has to know it’s too much, and as Kuroo curves his fingers just right inside your sloppy cunt and his tongue breaches just the tiniest bit the resistance of your ass, your eyes are falling open in huge plates, a long moan of his name on your tongue as you’re so close to cumming you can practically taste the high already.

“No, not now.” Kuroo chastises you as he retreats his tongue and fingers from you, the arch of your body ready to snap curling in a tremble of a denied release.

“Too soon, kitten. I want to savor this.” His tone comes out between pleased and patronizing, and it makes your cunt clench, empty. 

You heave, unfocused eyes blinking the wicked golden away. “What--” A deep breath. “What do you want from me?”

“Wrong question, kitten.” Kuroo tells you just as his massive frame bends over you, the wicked eyes seducing you in once again -- not that they ever stopped. “Now that I got a taste,” He murmurs practically against your lips, and you lick where his breath hits, captivated, “I want all of you.”

 He lets you fall on the bed once again and maneuvers your body without difficulty until your ass is high in the air and your thighs are spread, his tail lighter around your throat, fondly slithering on your jaw. His knee presses on the mattress until it squeaks and his hands massage from your thighs to your ass, prying it open and kneading it with hard, powerful hands.

“Beautiful.” He praises you and you swear your pussy throbs and flutters hard enough to make a gushing noise. By the way Kuroo snickers, it may be true. 

His tongue is the first thing you feel right after his laboured breathing on your cunt. It pries you open, thick muscle sliding inside you, big and wet and dexterous and you’re moaning against the mattress in seconds. 

Kuroo seems pleased even though all he does is hum, his large hands press on your back and the other opens your cheeks wide for his assault. Something hot prods your asshole, and you’re surprised at how careful his fingers can be while maneuvering the wetness left by his tongue there. They move slowly but surely as he presses and retreats, opening you from two fronts and still seemingly not enough.

He decides to change, his tongue coming out of your sex and then sliding to your ass as his thumbs open your lips for him to watch as he dips two big fingers inside your cunt. The stretch, the massive pleasure of being assaulted by both ends make you clench and cream around his digits, once again climbing up the familiar euphoric road. 

This time, however, Kuroo stops you differently.

His hard, heavy hand falls on your ass cheeks forcefully in what must be his intention of being light. You yelp loudly and groan, somehow caught between winding down and flying right over the edge. 

“Oh, hoho~” Sounds from his voice and he descends his hand once again on your ass, heavy and startling. It sounds so loud and so lewd in the empty room, your whole being burns in place, trembling from the effort of holding yourself in all fours and the pure elation growing inside you, spreading from your fingertips to the depraved center of your being. 

As the sting settles in your senses, it winds down your orgasm but makes a renewed wave drip from your cunt and down your thigh. You’re surprised at how it excites you, the pain, but fuck it still stings. His hand falls on your ass a couple more times but then his hot palms knead the stinging flesh, an exquisite feeling spreading over you as it throbs and burns and you melt.

“Ugh! Fuck!” You groan, biting the mattress, unable to tell him to stop and too embarrassed to tell him to keep going.

“You really are a nice plaything, aren’t you?” Kuroo asks but it seems as if it's more for himself, his digits collecting your wetness as he dips once again inside your cunt, spreading his fingers apart and sliding a third inside just as his thumb circles your clit lightly and you howl, sensitive and wanton, too eager into tasting bliss.

This time, at least you’re half-conscious he’s not letting you cum. Kuroo stops, leaving you clenching for something, anything and gives you nothing. His immoral smirk seems to sound in the air, much as the way his tail leaves your throat to circle your hair and yank you back, stuffing your open mouth with the fingers that were just inside you. You lap obediently at them and he groans in your ear, teeth nibbling at your skin. It’s almost as if he’s tempted.

“We’re almost ready, kitten.” He tells you with a hoarse voice, all sin and flames, “Hold on.”

“Ready?” You question poorly with a mouth stuffed of fingers, but he understands and nods your way, his tongue licking the spit that starts dripping from the corner of your mouth at how broad his fingers open it. 

You don’t see if Kuroo undress or if he just magically gets naked behind you, the startling thing being the incredible feeling of his hot skin on yours, the dazzling feeling of his hard planes of muscle on your back, the sublime sight of his skin marked by faint scars; When you feel the scalding, throbbing thick member at the side of your thigh, however, you have to look back. 

“Oh my God,” You murmur at the sight of his cock. It’s proportional to his form, but that just means it’s ridiculously big, a veiny, swollen thing that seems looming as it stands close to you, and it clicks in your slow mind just what he meant by almost ready.

“Nope, I’m on the other team here.” Kuroo grins at you as he turns you with your back on the bed, spreads you on the cushion until your thighs hurt from the effort. His tail sways behind him as if to paint a scene, and you realize his wings are nowhere to be seen now, “Though I do think it’s some kind of poetic justice to have you screaming and blaspheming jesus while I fuck you silly.”

The higher part of your cheekbones alights with flames at the implication and you gasp back the words you planned on speaking when Kuroo’s hand pivots your lower back up to his mouth and closes his efforts on your neglected clit as his freak thick tongue enters you in one go.

You cannot explain the sensation of such a soft muscle invading your walls, or the way in which it seems to focus so expertly on your weak spots, but you’re too wound up not to fall head first into rapture. 

When he stops this time, you actually curse him, in the most wrecked sound that has ever left your lips.

“Ughhhhhhh--Fuck you!”

The bastard laughs, debauched, then deposits a kiss over your pussy as his golden eyes fix on you. “Now you’re ready.”

Kuroo adjusts until you’re both at the bed, pulling you up on his powerful thighs until his cock bounces over your navel and reaches way too high for you to actually be calm. But then he retreats his hips, bent over you so his lips can steal the air from your lungs just as his large hand palms at your breasts and his tail slither by your side. 

“Try not to cum too fast, kitten.”

“Easier said than done,” you grumble back against his lips and let yourself fall into the ruthless ecstasy of being spread open on his cock. His lips thread on the side of your jaw, under your neck, biting and sucking on your skin as his hands divide themselves between holding you up and pawing at every bit of you they can reach.

Everything feels so good, as if he knows your inner thoughts by hint alone -- your toes curl at each newfound area that receives his onslaught, you’re contorting at how good his mouth feels on your pulsepoint as he slowly starts to sink his cock inside you. It’s a weird feeling, to feel so full and yet still so eager, but you’re welcoming him at each torturous inch he manages to squeeze inside your tight walls. Your body trembles from the effort, Kuroo’s tongue slides from your neck to your nipple as his hand climbs up and settles around your throat, his fingers enveloping your neck.

Your heart picks up enough that you feel it beating on your ears as you search for his eyes and finally you’re pinned in place under the sharp gold and their twisted intent. 

“Scream for god if you want me to stop.” Is the warning he gives you before his fingers start constricting around your neck, your airways blocked as your chest starts to heave. And in between the small twinge of anxiousness and alarm, you realize just how much that entices you, how much it makes you burn and crave. Somehow you feel corrupted, falling into desires that threaten to peel you apart and leave you exposed.

Kuroo’s cock keeps slowly stretching your insides and his tongue twirls your nipple, your lungs burning for air and your eyes rolling inside your skull as you skyrocket into blissful free-fall. 

“Oh, hell yes.” You listen but don’t register as your body seems to be crushed under the massive pressure of your climax, burning and bright, sound ringing in your head that you come to find out it’s from your hoarse moan, your breathing laboured as Kuroo allows you to suck in air during your peak.

It dawns on you as you’re coming back to your body that theres a twinge of soft pain indicating Kuroo has bottomed out, his muscular thighs pressing flush against yours, the feeling incredible but fuck so much right now. 

As Kuroo nestles himself entirely inside of you, you feel as if your focus shifts, the task to not concentrate all of your attention on the massive hot cock spliting you in two is difficult. Your body feels tight, and not just from your fluttering walls that are constricting around him.

Kuroo sends you a big smile above your head, twinkling eyes in the dark. “Now, hold on.”

You do your best to do so, your arms latching onto him with all the strength you can muster as his hips retreat and then slam back inside you. You’re jolted at each push and pull, the sensual motions so depraved as the noises echo in the room, and you’re dragged into the ferocious pleasure that threatens to overwhelm you, and despite the fact you’ve cum just few moments before, as his tail slides between your bodies and circles and pats at your clit, you’re screaming and, quite unbelievably, cumming again.

“Now we’re very ready.” Kuroo says in a grunt above you, shameless grin as his eyes do their golden thing once again. He lets you stop trembling, peppering small kisses along your collarbone until you’re breathing normally again, but something tells you you’re just being fooled. 

“What?” You tiredly question, the feeling of dread confirming your suspicion.

“We have the whole night ahead of us, little one.” Kuroo nudges at the side of your face, bites softly at the junction of your jaw. “Or we could have more. All you need to do is say yes and i’ll mark you nice and easy here--” His teeth softly nibble on your pulsepoint, “and you’ll be mine.”

“Oh, god.” 

“Haha, wrong again.” His eyes pierce yours, swirling gold as molten honey dripping over your body and weighting your mind down. “Go ahead, tell me what you want.”

It tips out, softly and raw, and you have to close your eyes to hide your emotion. “To belong.”

“Oh, my little thing.” Kuroo softly murmurs on your ear, “Belong to me, then.”

You’re swaying despite lying down, something big and heavy coiling inside your chest as you blink, “I don’t want to belong to someone who isn’t mine.”

It’s a big truth to leave out -- the need for companionship, but a mutual one, a lasting one, a trusting one. You don’t want to be alone, but you also don’t want to have someone who doesn’t belong to you, too. 

Kuroo just smiles, golden eyes on yours, melting you from the fierceness alone. “Exactly,” he speaks against your lips, the taste of his breath on your tongue and you eagerly gulp it down, wickedly licking at his lips. “But i’ll be yours, too.”

In your hazed state, that’s all you need to hear, so you just shyly nod -- and Kuroo growls, angles your head to the side, and sears a marking bite on your neck -- deep, and painful. You mewl, body arching into his touch, and his tongue laps at the fresh wound, making it nice and numb.

“Now, let’s go to the main course.” Kuroo gives you no rest, retreating his hips and slamming back inside. “Don’t forget to breathe!” He teases between your moans. 

Once the fucking starts, it’s a frantic mess, and it goes on forever until the mere feeling of Kuroo’s cock leaving your heat is enough to make you whimper at the loss. The feeling of him inside your walls, a thing that mingles with your being, seares your memory until you cannot remember the feeling of not being split open on his thick cock. As you melt away from the overstimulation of having no rest while Kuroo contently and incessantly keeps pistoning inside you, your painful pleasure mixes until you’re climbing into something that feels weirdly uncanny, your mind -- or is it your body? -- twirls inside itself as if there’s something more than just sweet release ready to burst out. 

Kuroo has made you both teeter on the edge of pleasure and fall into it so many times you can’t differentiate the feelings that come now, this sensation of something being pulled out of you like the many orgasms he caused.

“Hmmm… Yes, my time is coming.” Kuroo groans, his hips movements turning sloppy, apparently displeased with his fucking being cut short while you very much suck a thankful breath at being able to rest. Kuroo’s teeth descend on your neck once again, his hot tongue over the pulsating mark of his bite and you feel him shudder and groan your name as he finally - finally - peaks, the feeling of hot spurts spreading inside you. 

As he cums, Kuroo brings a finger to rub over your abused clit softly and between your oversensitivity and the fact he angles his fat cockhead to softly pound over your sweet spot as he sails his own climax, there’s very little you can do but be ripped apart in bliss, once again, by him. This time is weird. Even as pleasure keeps swirling inside you and building up with the eerie sensation, you can do very little but hold on and wait until the waves crash and pass and you can blissfully surrender into the darkness of exhaustion. 

However, the freakish sensation twirling inside yourself builds and builds until you’re light-headed from the feeling and you just then realize how you’re shining, and how Kuroo has disappeared.

You don’t even have it in yourself to panic. Your body feels heavy and used, spent in the best way possible, but still completely unused to such a frantic session as every muscle in your being throbs, and your eyelids weigh the world as they fall closed and you’re engulfed by darkness.

-

[bonus scene]

 When you wake up in the morning, you are engulfed in a nice blanket, dressed in some mismatched set of pajamas, feeling as if you just had the best sleep of your life - and a weird vivid dream to go with it. You’re blinking up to your ceiling, stretching on your bed and satisfied with how the knots break in small noises as you sit up, when you feel just how sore you are, how your body is heavy despite satisfied, how your thighs burn and your sex throbs. 

Everything crashes up on your mind way too fast, and you’re suddenly torn between passing out and bolting up, but as you try to get up your body falters and a big, hard, hot hand plants itself over your middle and pulls you right back at the bed. 

Of course, you scream.

“Shh, kitten, there’s people trying to sleep here, y’know?”

“What--How--What are you doing here?” You shriek, looking at what is definitely the demon you thought you dreamed, but in a way more humanized version if the absence of his horns, claws and massive wings are anything to go by. The golden eyes are sharp as ever, but no black background to them, and you can infer by that much that his sinful tail probably isn't around too.

The grin he sends your way gives you war flashbacks that make your skin prickle with goosebumps. 

“Well, yesterday was quite nice.” He tells you and you can feel your whole face burn from his tone alone. “So I decided that hell can wait a bit more while I have more fun with you.” His eyes flash with a weird energy, and Kuroo brings his fingers to glide over his bite mark at your neck. The throbbing mark you had forgotten about until now. “After all, you’re mine now.”

“Oh, fuck.”

You’re doomed.

[asset35-maya]

Confession prompt from this list

“Just listen, real closely, alright. And stop laughing.”

It’s late.

It’s a fancy neighbourhood. And Gavin doesn’t know what the hell he’s doing there.

The building is taller than any he’s ever visited, let alone lived in. There’s exotic plants in the lobby and jazz music playing in the elevator.

Trust the plastic prick to manage his finances this well.

Gavin gets to the top floor. He pauses to take in the abstract art on the walls.

They can afford to put Manfred paintings in the hallway? Holy shit. I should turn around and go home right now.

He comes to a stop in front of a double-door. The only one on the floor.

Penthouse? Damn, Tincan…

He starts to reach for the door bell, but then pulls back.

This is crazy. What am I doing?

He spends a few minutes floundering and is just about to walk shamefully back to the elevator when a crashing sound resounds from within the apartment.

“Goddamnit!”

Gavin smiles to himself. His clumsiness and colourful language have fully rubbed off on his partner. Cyberlife’s deep learning algorithms were no match for the company of Gavin Reed.

“Janice, you come back here right now!”

Gavin frowns. He’s heard plenty about the feisty cat but never understood why she had a name befitting an old office secretary. He didn’t understand a lot of things about his partner… but he supposed that was part of the appeal.

Another crash. A loud feline yowl. An exasperated groan.

Is he trying to bathe or skin his cat?

Gavin waits it out as the meows and grunts and crashes continue.

He feels a bit like a creep, eavesdropping on his partner through the door, but he honestly doesn’t know what to do next. He’d worked himself up after a few whisky shots with Hank… the old man convinced him to finally go do the deed… and then all his confidence drained as soon as the autonomous taxi rolled up outside the glittering residential complex. His old insecurities came back in full force.

People like me don’t belong within a mile of this postcode…

What was I thinking?

People like me don’t belong within a mile of people like Nines.

The door suddenly swings open violently.

“Jenson, if it’s about the fucking noise again, I swear to RA9! You are two floors down! How the fuck can you-”

Nines breaks off as he registers the identity of the man lurking outside his door. His blue eyes widen in surprise. Gavin stares back in equal surprise.

The android standing slack-jawed in his doorway looks nothing like the stoic, snooty RK900 that Gavin has come to know and love.

His dark hair hangs loose around his face… he’s bare-legged, actually in his boxers… and there’s a long slit ripped into his thin white t-shirt. Gavin is also a cat-owner. He knows the look. But never in his wildest dreams would he have imagined it on Nines.

“Um… hi …”

“Gavin! What are you doing here?”

“I… was in the neighbourhood.”

Nines nods slowly and Gavin kicks himself mentally.

“Just wanted to say hi. And now I have. Bye.”

Cheeks burning, he’s halfway through turning on his heel, when Nines reaches for his arm.

“Hey wait!”

And before either can say anything else, there’s a flash of black fur shooting though the crack in the door.

“Fuck, Janice!”

Gavin drops to his knees instinctively and deftly traps the rambunctious little animal. He stands up with a grimace.

“You sure she’s a cat? Acts and smells like a dog.”

Nines rolls his eyes and takes his pet back.

“She got stuck on top of my kitchen cabinet and fell in the compost box when I tried to get her down.”

“Man, I keep telling you to buy her a treehouse. She likes exploring.”

“It’ll ruin my whole aesthetic.”

“Can’t be worse than the respect Janice shows your decor today. Get one. I’m telling you. Asshole stopped shredding my curtains immediately when he got his.”

Nines shrugs noncommittally but his LED cycles yellow in a manner that tells Gavin he’s ordering a kitty treehouse immediately.

Janice struggles in Nines’ grasp, clawing at his ruined shirt. He glances down and tosses her back into the apartment, shutting the door firmly behind him. He looks back at Gavin, arms folded over his chest.

“As much as I need it, I’m guessing you didn’t come here to give me pet advice in the middle of the night.”

“No…”

“Then what’s up, Gavin?”

He stares at his feet. The alcohol haze that brought him to Nines’ doorstep is clearing. Under the glow of the crystal chandelier hanging above them, Gavin feels very stupid.

“I… it’s nothing. I’ll see you at work tomorrow.”

“Gavin, my scans are telling me all kinds of things right now… but I’d rather you tell me yourself.”

“What?”

“Yeah sorry, I forgot to disable my facial analysis… emotion recognition… and um… pheromone detectors…”

There’s a knowing look on Nines’ face and Gavin feels so damn small.

Guess I shouldn’t bother taking the elevator down. I’ll just jump.

“Tell me, Gavin. Before Janice chews through all the cushions on my couch.”

“I… Nines...”

“Gavin.”

There’s silence, even from within the apartment. Nines’ eyes briefly dart to the door, scanning right through it to check on Janice no doubt, and flit back to Gavin. A teasing smile is playing on the corner of his lips.

The whole game is up. He already knows. Just tell him.

Gavin closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

“Should I go wash the compost off my cat first… or are you planning on telling me sometime tonight?”

His eyes fly open to see Nines stifle a giggle.

What a cocky prick!

Several moments pass with Nines’ mirth steadily increasing and Gavin’s shyness transforming into annoyance.

“Aren’t you gonna invite me in?”

“Why?”

“Goddamnit Nines.”

“You’ve never visited me before. I have no idea why you’re here. The least you could do is give me an explanation for showing up unannounced and interrupting my night.”

“Alright, you prick. Just listen, okay. Just listen, real closely, alright. And stop laughing.”

Nines’ hand actually comes up to cup his mouth as his frame shakes with silent laughter.

“You got a lot of attitude for someone getting their ass kicked by a tiny kitten.”

Nines doubles over and holds up a finger, actual tears streaming down his face.

“Oh my god. You’re such an idiot. I can’t believe I was worried about coming here. Shut up for a second. Shut up.”

Nines props himself up against his door. His chest is heaving and he looks ready to burst into another fit of giggles, but he manages to hold it in valiantly.

Gavin clears his throat. He’s come all the way and he’s going to say his piece, fears and insecurities and everything else be damned.

Just as he opens his mouth… Nines pushes himself off the door and reaches for his face. Then suddenly, somehow, he’s being kissed.

Plush lips cover his own, and his eyelids flutter shut as Nines pulls him in. By the time they part for air, both are panting and intertwined in the entranceway.

Nines bumps his nose against Gavin’s.

“So did I guess right? Is that what you wanted to tell me?”

“Yeah pretty much.”

Their eyes lock for a moment and laughter threatens to bubble up once more. Lips trembling, they both manage to quell it. Foreheads touch and each man’s gaze dips back down to the other’s mouth.

They start to lean back in… and then there’s a spectacular shatter of glass from the other side of the door… an accompanying screech… and absolutely no chance of escaping the hilarity that bursts forth once more.