#again apologizing for everything. still in the depths. yeah all day | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

songbirdseung · 6 months

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young love 2 / nishimura riki

read part one here 🤍

synopsis: she fell first but he fell harder type of scenario. ANGTSY

warnings: jealously, one sexual innuendo and suggestive part with hoon (but no smut) btw this takes place in college time

wc: 6.6k

"hey, you've been avoiding me all day. Is everything alright, babe?" Mina settled down beside Riki, who sat lost in thought, facing the beach. Unaware of her presence, he was entirely focused on the crashing waves, the chilly breeze, and the swirling thoughts in his mind. "Riki?" She called out again, giving him a gentle nudge. Finally snapping out of his trance, he turned to his girlfriend, apologizing and asking her to repeat what she had said. "Are we okay? Or more importantly, are you okay?" She remained oblivious to Riki's growing feelings for YN, unable to connect the dots. However, Riki knew he couldn't break her heart with such information, especially during what was supposed to be a joyful trip. So, he concocted a white lie, reassuring her that he would be fine.

mina studied riki's expression, a hint of concern lingering in her eyes as she waited for his response. riki forced a smile, masking the turmoil churning within him as he reassured her with a nod.

"yeah, babe, everything's fine," he replied, his voice steady despite the tumult of emotions raging beneath the surface. "just got lost in my thoughts for a moment there, but i'm okay now."

mina's features softened with relief, a smile gracing her lips as she reached out to squeeze his hand gently. "okay, just making sure," she said, her voice warm with affection. "you know i'm here for you if you ever need to talk, right?"

riki's heart swelled with gratitude for mina's unwavering support, but a pang of guilt tugged at his conscience as he realized the depth of the lie he had just told her. he knew he couldn't burden her with the truth, not when it threatened to unravel the delicate balance of their relationship.

"yeah, i know," riki replied, forcing himself to meet mina's gaze with a reassuring smile. "thanks, babe. i really appreciate it."

with a sense of unease lingering in the back of his mind, riki pushed aside his inner turmoil, determined to make the most of their time at the beach and protect mina's heart at all costs. but beneath the facade of calm, the storm of conflicting emotions continued to rage, leaving riki adrift in a sea of uncertainty.

unbeknownst to them, you sat a few feet away, nestled in one of the beach chairs, solitary. Your sole desire was to relish the view while immersing yourself in music until Mina settled beside Riki. You couldn't deny the effect they had on you anymore, though a small part of her still pondered the possibilities of what could have been. But now you had Sunghoon—shouldn't that be enough to make you happy?

"jeez, yn, you're such a dunce," you muttered to yourself, your voice barely audible. you removed your earphones and shut your eyes tightly, attempting to divert your thoughts from what might have been. "well, maybe not entirely stupid… okay, sometimes," sunoo's voice interrupted from behind, causing you to jump slightly. he chuckled at your startled reaction before settling down next to you, inquiring about the whereabouts of your significant other. you gestured in the direction where sunghoon, jake, and a few strangers were engaged in a game of beach volleyball. "so, why are you sitting here alone? and conveniently positioned just a few feet away from riki and mina?" sunoo probed further.

you shrugged, offering a weak smile to sunoo. "just needed some time alone, i guess," you replied, your voice tinged with a hint of melancholy. "and as for the seating arrangement, pure coincidence, i assure you."

sunoo raised an eyebrow, his expression skeptical yet understanding. "right, coincidence," he echoed, a playful glint in his eyes.

sunoo's smile gradually faded into a serious expression as he fixed his gaze on you. "don't tell me you still have feelings for him, yn. i thought we were past that," he remarked, his tone tinged with concern.

you shook your head and let out a sigh, feeling the weight of his words pressing down on you. "it's not like i have feelings for him, i don't," you clarified, but then added, "but you can't blame me for occasionally wondering about the alternative possibilities or outcomes that could have been, sunoo."

deep down, all you truly desired now was sunghoon. you loved him dearly, but riki, your first young love, remained a lingering presence in your thoughts, a part of your past that refused to fade away.

"i get that, but instead of being so dramatic—" sunoo began, but you cut him off with a playful jab. "as if you're not dramatic as fuck, you're the drama queen in this friend group," you teased, earning a chuckle from sunoo as he playfully slapped your arm.

"shut up and listen," sunoo continued, his tone more serious now. "stop dwelling on the past. stop thinking about those things and start focusing on the future. a future where you find peace of mind, whether you're in a relationship or not."

he flicked your forehead lightly, a playful gesture before offering you the chance to join jake and sunghoon in a game. with a nod, you accepted his invitation, grateful for his words of wisdom and the distraction of spending time with your friends.

that's precisely what you ended up doing, making your way over to sunghoon's team with a gentle nudge from sunoo, who seemed determined to reunite you with your beau. as you joined their side, sunghoon greeted you with a sweet kiss on the forehead, causing a blush to rise to your cheeks.

"why's your forehead all red, baby?" sunghoon inquired with a playful grin, prompting you to sheepishly recount sunoo's teasing antics. your boyfriend chuckled at the anecdote, releasing you to join the game.

"get a room, damn!" jake's voice rang out from the opposite side of the net, his playful jab accompanied by a smirk. "ready to lose, yn?" he taunted, a competitive glint in his eye as he prepared for the match.

you chuckled at jake's playful taunt, feeling the familiar rush of competitiveness coursing through you. "lose? not a chance, jake!" you retorted, matching his competitive energy with a grin of your own.

with the game about to begin, you took your position on the court, feeling the warm sand beneath your feet and the anticipation building in the air. sunghoon flashed you an encouraging smile before the match started, his unwavering support giving you an extra boost of confidence.

as the game progressed, laughter and friendly banter filled the air, each point won or lost accompanied by cheers and groans from both teams. despite jake's confident taunts, your team managed to hold your own, each player contributing their skills and teamwork to keep the game tight.

in the end, it was a close match, with both teams giving it their all until the very last point. but as the final point was scored, your team emerged victorious, erupting into cheers and high-fives as you celebrated your hard-fought win.

"another round? maybe with riki this time?" sunghoon suggests, glancing behind at the couple. everyone nods and calls riki over, along with mina.

"oh, come on, riki! join us, it'll be fun," jake calls out, waving riki over with a grin.

riki hesitates for a moment, exchanging a glance with mina before standing up and making his way to the group. mina follows closely behind, a slight frown creasing her brow.

as riki joins the circle, the atmosphere shifts slightly, a subtle tension hanging in the air. you can't help but notice the awkwardness between riki and mina, wondering if anyone else has picked up on it.

as the game begins, you can't help but feel the weight of the unresolved tension lingering in the air. every interaction between riki and mina seems strained, their once easy rapport now marred by unspoken words and lingering doubts.

despite your efforts to focus on the game, your mind keeps drifting back to the uncomfortable situation unfolding before you. it's clear that something is amiss, but no one seems willing to address the elephant in the room.

as the game progresses, you can't shake the feeling that this outing, meant to be a fun-filled day at the beach, has taken an unexpected turn. and with each passing moment, the tension threatens to unravel the fragile bonds that hold your friend group together.

in the midst of the game, your attention scattered, you fail to notice the volleyball hurtling towards you. suddenly, both sunghoon and riki spring into action, moving at lightning speed to shield you from the incoming ball. sunghoon reaches you first, his arms wrapping around your waist protectively as he checks if you're alright.

"are you okay, yn?" he asks, concern etched into his features as he holds you close.

you nod, reassured by sunghoon's presence, but your gaze flickers to riki, who stands nearby with a nonchalant expression. despite sunghoon's awareness of riki's proximity, he brushes it off, focusing solely on ensuring your safety.

"thanks, sunghoon," you murmur gratefully, offering him a small smile.

meanwhile, riki rolls his eyes at the scene, a hint of annoyance flashing across his face before he turns away, seemingly unbothered.

as the game comes to an abrupt end, jake takes the initiative to diffuse the tension, suggesting that it's time for dinner despite the sun still hanging high in the sky. his words break the awkward atmosphere, prompting everyone to agree with a collective sigh of relief.

"yeah, let's call it a day," sunghoon chimes in, shooting a reassuring glance at you.

as the group begins to disperse, mina's gaze lingers on riki, her brow furrowing with realization. it dawns on her that riki's peculiar behavior may be more than just casual indifference — perhaps, deep down, he harbors feelings for you.

"you like her, don't you?" mina's voice cuts through the tension, her words hanging heavy in the air as everyone turns to look at riki.

riki freezes, caught off guard by mina's direct question. his cheeks flush slightly as he meets her gaze, unable to form a coherent response in front of everyone.

the atmosphere grows uncomfortably silent as the weight of mina's words sinks in, casting a shadow over the group. you exchange a glance with sunghoon, both of you unsure of how to navigate the sudden awkwardness that has enveloped the once cheerful gathering.

in yuna's room, the tension from the beach outing still lingered in the air like a heavy fog. yuna paced back and forth, her frustration evident in every movement.

"she's so dumb, why would she say that with everyone there?! she could've just talked to him in private, gosh, i knew i never liked her," yuna exclaimed, her voice laced with anger and disbelief.

you reached out to your best friend, trying to soothe her frayed nerves. "hey, maybe she was just in shock, in realization, yun. calm down," you urged gently, hoping to diffuse the situation before it escalated further.

yuna huffed, her agitation not yet subsiding. "but still, it's such a personal thing to bring up in front of everyone. poor riki must feel so embarrassed," she lamented, sinking onto her bed with a frustrated sigh.

you nodded in understanding, sitting down beside her. "i get it, it wasn't the most tactful move on mina's part. maybe she just didn't think before speaking," you suggested, trying to offer a different perspective.

yuna sighed, running a hand through her hair. "i just hate seeing riki like this. it's obvious he's struggling with his feelings, and mina's comment probably didn't help," she said, her voice softer now, filled with concern for her friend.

"i know, but maybe this will be a wake-up call for him to confront his feelings," you offered, trying to find a silver lining in the situation.

yuna nodded, her expression thoughtful. "you might be right. i just hope things don't get even more awkward between them," she said, casting a worried glance towards the door as if expecting riki or mina to walk in at any moment.

yuna suggests that you talk to riki, to make him realize that it's too late now and he needs to get over these feelings he developed for you.

you consider her suggestion carefully, knowing that it might not be an easy conversation to have. but you also understand the importance of addressing the situation before it becomes even more complicated.

"yeah, maybe you're right. i'll talk to him," you agree, steeling yourself for the inevitable awkwardness that lies ahead.

yuna gives you a supportive smile, grateful for your willingness to help. "i know it won't be easy, but i think it's for the best. riki needs to understand that life moves on, and dwelling on what could have been will only hold him back," she says, her tone hopeful yet firm.

with yuna's encouragement, you resolve to have the difficult conversation with riki, hoping that it will help him find closure and move forward.

after discussing, you decide that it might be best to give riki some time to process everything before broaching the subject with him.

"i think you're right, yuna. i'll give riki some space for now," you say, nodding in agreement with your friend.

yuna nods in understanding, appreciating your decision. "that sounds like a good plan. let him come to terms with everything on his own terms," she says, her tone thoughtful.

with a shared understanding, you and yuna leave the conversation at that, knowing that confronting riki about his feelings is a delicate matter that requires careful consideration and timing. for now, all you can do is wait and hope that he finds the clarity he needs to move forward.

after a while, yuna decides it's time for you to head back to your shared room with sunghoon. as she closes the door behind you, she can't resist making a few suggestive jokes.

"alright, lovebirds, time for some alone time," yuna teases, winking mischievously as she sends you off.

you chuckle at her playful banter, shaking your head as you walk towards your room where sunghoon is waiting for you, already out the door. just before you reach him, yuna calls out one last joke.

"remember to keep it pg-13, we don't want to hear any wild noises," she adds with a laugh, causing you to blush and sunghoon to raise an eyebrow in amusement.

you enter the room, trying to stifle your laughter from yuna's playful remarks. sunghoon looks at you with a bemused expression, clearly curious about what transpired outside.

"what was that all about?" sunghoon asks, a smirk playing on his lips as he approaches you.

you shake your head, still grinning at yuna's antics. "oh, just yuna being her usual cheeky self," you reply, trying to downplay the situation.

sunghoon chuckles, wrapping his arms around you. "well, now that we have some privacy, what do you say we make the most of it?" he suggests, his voice low and suggestive as he leans in closer.

you feel a rush of excitement at his words, your cheeks flushing with anticipation. as you lean in to kiss him, you can't help but be grateful for the playful banter that brought you both closer together.

the next morning, you feel a gentle nudge as sunghoon wakes you up, his warm smile greeting you as you open your eyes. hovering over you on the bed, he leans in, and you plant a soft kiss on his nose before stretching lazily.

"good morning, sleepyhead," sunghoon says affectionately, his eyes sparkling with fondness.

you return his smile and sit up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. sunghoon gives you a quick peck on the cheek before getting up to let you get ready.

downstairs in the kitchen, you find riki sitting with sunoo and jungwon, engaged in a lively conversation. you offer them a warm greeting as you join them, feeling the pleasant buzz of morning chatter fill the room.

"good morning, everyone," you say cheerfully, exchanging smiles with the group.

while you're carefully arranging sunghoon's cereal with fruits, jake shuffles into the kitchen, his eyes still heavy with sleep. spotting you, he does a double-take and then lets out a surprised gasp.

"whoa, what's that on your neck?" jake asks, his voice laced with sleepy confusion.

you freeze in your tracks, feeling your cheeks flush with embarrassment as you realize what he's referring to. jungwon stifles a laugh at jake's sleepy shock, while sunoo and sunghoon exchange surprised glances.

riki, sitting nearby, seems to pretend not to notice, focusing intently on his breakfast.

you meet riki's gaze briefly, a pang of guilt washing over you as you remember your plan to talk to him soon.

sunghoon, catching on to the situation, jokingly scolds jake. "hey, jake, mind your own business!" he says with a playful grin, trying to lighten the mood.

amidst the light-hearted banter, sunghoon shoots you a knowing look, silently asking if you're okay. you offer him a reassuring smile, silently thanking him for his understanding.

jake, still rubbing the sleep from his eyes, seems to realize the awkwardness of his comment. "oops, sorry, didn't mean to pry," he mumbles sheepishly, retreating slightly.

you nod, grateful for his apology, and continue with your breakfast preparations, trying to shake off the embarrassment. sunghoon steps in to help, smoothly diverting the conversation to a more neutral topic.

as the atmosphere in the kitchen lightens, you exchange a glance with riki once more, silently acknowledging the impending conversation that hangs between you.

with breakfast finally ready, everyone gathers around the table, the earlier awkwardness dissipating into the background as laughter and chatter fill the air.

after breakfast, you and sunghoon take on the role of "parents" of the group, tackling the dishes together as the others relax or continue with their morning routines. the warm water and soapy suds provide a soothing backdrop as you work side by side, the clinking of dishes filling the air.

as you scrub away at a stubborn stain, sunghoon glances at you, a serious expression crossing his face. "hey, yn, now might be a good time to talk to riki," he says gently, his voice barely above a whisper over the sound of running water.

you pause, considering his words, knowing that sunghoon is right. it's better to address the situation sooner rather than later, especially before any more awkwardness arises.

nodding in agreement, you steel yourself for the conversation ahead, grateful for sunghoon's support and understanding. with a shared determination, you and sunghoon finish up the dishes and then make your way to find riki, ready to finally have the difficult but necessary conversation.

riki was alone, engrossed in a video game when you approached him, quietly taking a seat beside him. his fingers paused on the controller, and you could sense the tension radiating from him as you spoke up.

"hey, riki… can we talk?" you ask softly, your voice carrying a mixture of concern and determination.

riki's eyes flicker with uncertainty as he turns to look at you, his expression guarded. he hesitates for a moment, clearly apprehensive about what the conversation might entail.

"yeah, sure," he replies, his voice slightly shaky as he sets the controller down and turns his full attention to you.

as you and riki sit together, the weight of the impending conversation hangs heavily in the air. you take a deep breath, steeling yourself for the difficult words you know you need to say.

"riki, i… i need to talk to you about something," you begin, your voice trembling slightly with emotion. "i'm sorry… i know you have feelings for me, but… i don't feel the same way anymore."

riki's expression falls, his shoulders slumping as your words sink in. "i… i understand," he replies softly, his voice barely above a whisper. "i'm sorry, yn. i should've realized my feelings for you sooner… i regret rejecting you before."

you shake your head, feeling a pang of sadness at the pain in riki's eyes. "it's not your fault, riki," you say gently, reaching out to place a comforting hand on his shoulder. "we were just meant to be friends… childhood friends who grew apart romantically."

riki nods, his gaze dropping to his lap as he struggles to find the right words. "i should've tried harder… i should've fought for us," he murmurs, his voice thick with regret.

you offer him a sympathetic smile, squeezing his shoulder gently. "it's okay, riki," you assure him. "we both made mistakes… but we can't change the past. we need to focus on the relationships we have now, separately."

riki nods again, a sense of acceptance settling over him as he looks up to meet your gaze. "yeah… you're right," he says quietly. "i'm sorry for everything, yn."

you nod in return, a weight lifting off your shoulders as you both come to terms with the situation. despite the sadness of the moment, there's a sense of closure in knowing that you can move forward as friends, each on your own path towards happiness.

as they finish talking and discussing the future of their friendship, they share a heartfelt hug, a silent understanding passing between them. just as they begin to pull away, mina walks into the room, her expression apologetic.

"hey, sorry to interrupt," mina says softly, her eyes filled with sincerity. "i just wanted to say that i didn't mean to cause any awkwardness yesterday. my intentions were genuine, i promise."

riki and you exchange a glance, a flicker of relief passing between you at mina's words. "it's okay, mina," you say with a warm smile, genuinely touched by her sincerity. "we understand."

riki nods in agreement, his expression softening as he looks at mina. "yeah, we know you didn't mean any harm," he says, his voice filled with reassurance.

mina lets out a relieved sigh, a weight lifting off her shoulders as she smiles gratefully at her friends. "thank you for understanding," she says, her voice tinged with relief. "i'm really glad we can move past this."

with a sense of resolution in the air, the three friends share a brief but meaningful moment of understanding, each grateful for the bond of friendship that binds them together.

as they wandered through the bustling streets, the group took in the sights and sounds of the city, their laughter echoing off the walls as they recounted funny stories and shared inside jokes.

"hey, jungwon, are you sure we're going the right way?" sunghoon teased, earning a playful shove from jungwon.

"of course i am! i've got a great sense of direction," jungwon retorted with a grin.

sunoo jumped in with his signature humor, "yeah, if by 'great sense of direction' you mean getting lost every five minutes!"

the group erupted into laughter, with yuna adding, "well, at least we'll have an adventure!"

riki, who had been quiet earlier, chuckled softly, finally joining in on the fun. "yeah, who needs a map when you've got jungwon?"

jake, always quick with a witty remark, quipped, "yeah, he's our own personal compass, leading us in circles!"

the banter continued as they strolled through the colorful streets, each joke and comment bringing them closer together. despite the occasional wrong turn and detour, they knew that as long as they were together, every moment would be an adventure.

reaching a park with various attractions and things to do, you spotted something that reminded you of your childhood. with a grin, you grabbed riki's arm and pulled him over to take a look.

"hey, remember this?" you said, pointing excitedly at the familiar sight.

riki's eyes lit up with recognition, and he chuckled as memories of your childhood flooded back. "yeah, i remember. you were terrible at this game," he teased, nudging you playfully.

you rolled your eyes, laughing along with him. "hey, i wasn't that bad! besides, i bet i can beat you now," you challenged, a competitive glint in your eye.

riki smirked, accepting the challenge. "oh, it's on," he declared, leading the way to the game booth with a playful grin. as you both stepped up to the challenge, the friendly rivalry between you reignited, sparking laughter and camaraderie as you competed against each other just like old times.

next, the group dispersed into two teams, with you and riki finding yourselves on opposing sides. as the game began, the competitive spirit ignited once again, with each team determined to come out on top.

with laughter and friendly banter filling the air, the group watched eagerly, cheering on their respective teammates and teasing each other mercilessly at every missed shot or fumbled move. sunghoon's infectious laughter echoed through the park as he cheered you on, while jake couldn't resist poking fun at riki whenever he made a mistake.

later, the group found themselves deciding what to eat, so they headed to the mall, hoping to satisfy their hunger with a variety of options. However, their plans hit a snag as they found themselves once again getting lost, courtesy of Jungwon's questionable sense of direction.

"Jungwon, are you sure we're going the right way?" Sunghoon asked with a chuckle, glancing around at the unfamiliar surroundings.

Jungwon scratched his head sheepishly. "Uh, well, I thought so, but maybe not," he admitted, his expression sheepish.

Sunoo couldn't resist chiming in with a grin, "Looks like we're taking the scenic route again!"

Yuna laughed, shaking her head. "Maybe we should invest in a GPS for Jungwon," she joked.

next, they reached the mall, and as they waited for everyone to order at the diner, sunghoon and riki found themselves drawn to the claw machines and booths in the retro-designed diner. amidst the flashing lights and nostalgic ambiance, they shared a quiet, one-on-one conversation.

sunghoon leaned against the claw machine, his gaze thoughtful as he spoke. "hey, riki, i just wanted to say that there's no bad blood between us, you know?"

riki glanced up, surprised by sunghoon's sincerity. "yeah, i know. i appreciate that," he replied, a hint of gratitude in his voice.

sunghoon continued, his tone gentle. "i know things might be a bit awkward because of… well, you know," he gestured vaguely, referring to riki's feelings for yn.

riki nodded, understanding. "yeah, i get it. but i want you to know that i'm really happy for you and yn. you guys deserve each other."

sunghoon smiled, feeling a sense of relief wash over him. "thanks, riki. that means a lot," he said, grateful for riki's understanding.

as they continued to chat, the tension between them eased, replaced by a sense of camaraderie and mutual respect.

"hey, riki, i get it. it's not easy to just switch off those feelings," sunghoon said sympathetically, placing a reassuring hand on riki's shoulder. "but you've got to try to move forward. you know, there's this saying: 'the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.'"

riki chuckled weakly, appreciating sunghoon's attempt at lightening the mood. "yeah, i guess you're right. but what if i just can't seem to shake these feelings?"

sunghoon nodded understandingly. "it's tough, i know. but you've got to focus on what's in front of you. mina is a great girl, and she really cares about you. don't waste the chance to get to know her better and appreciate what you have with her."

riki sighed, knowing that sunghoon was right. "yeah, you're right. thanks, sunghoon. i needed to hear that," he admitted gratefully.

sunghoon gave him a supportive smile. "anytime, buddy. just remember, you're not alone in this. we're all here for you." with that, they shared a brief, understanding nod, knowing that even though the road ahead might be tough, they would face it together as friends.

as riki and sunghoon triumphantly emerge from the claw machine area, each clutching a plush toy in their hands, their faces light up with excitement. with a shared grin, they make their way back to the rest of the group, eager to show off their prizes.

"check it out, guys! look what we won!" sunghoon announces proudly, holding up his prize—a penguin with a big, friendly smile.

riki joins in, brandishing his own victory—a cute fluffy baby chick. "and look at this beauty! who's the claw machine champion now?"

jake chuckles, giving them both a playful pat on the back. "yeah, seriously, well done! maybe you should start your own claw machine championship league."

sunghoon beams with pride as he presents you with a cute penguin plush, his eyes sparkling with affection as he watches your delighted reaction.

"here you go, babe," he says softly, placing the plush in your hands. "a little something to remember this day by."

you can't help but smile back at him, touched by his thoughtfulness. "thank you, sunghoon," you reply, leaning in to press a gentle kiss on his cheek. "i love it."

meanwhile, riki playfully teases mina, pretending to keep a tight grip on the chick plush he won, much to her amusement. "hey, hands off, riki!" she laughs, attempting to wrestle the toy from his grasp.

riki grins mischievously, holding the plush just out of mina's reach. "sorry, babe, but this little guy is mine," he teases, feigning innocence as mina gives him an exaggerated pout.

with a playful roll of her eyes, mina gives riki a gentle shove. "fine, keep it then," she says, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "but you owe me one."

riki chuckles, relenting as he hands over the plush to mina. "of course, anything for you," he replies, leaning in to press a sweet kiss on her forehead.

as the group shares in the lighthearted moment, laughter filling the air, sunghoon wraps an arm around your shoulders, pulling you close. you lean into his embrace, feeling grateful for the love and laughter that surrounds you.

as they enjoy their meal, riki leans over to mina with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "hey, mina, what do you say we pretend to propose to each other so we can get free dessert?" he suggests, a playful smirk playing on his lips.

mina stifles a laugh, shaking her head at his antics. "as tempting as that sounds, i don't think i want to get proposed to at a random retro diner," she replies, a hint of amusement in her voice.

sunoo chimes in from across the table, his tone teasing. "yeah, i don't think that's quite the romantic setting you're looking for, mina," he quips, earning a chuckle from the rest of the group.

riki shrugs, still wearing a playful grin. "hey, it was worth a shot, right?" he says with a wink, before digging back into his meal. the group shares a laugh at his antics, enjoying the light-hearted moment as they continue to savor their time together.

sunghoon chuckles at riki's failed attempt, then a mischievous glint sparkles in his eyes as an idea forms. "hey, why don't we pretend it's yn's birthday? they'll definitely give us free dessert for that!"

yuna raises an eyebrow, a smirk playing on her lips. "but what if they ask for id? i doubt they'll believe you're turning twenty-one again," she teases, glancing at sunghoon with a playful glimmer in her eyes.

sunghoon laughs, waving off yuna's concern. "don't worry, we'll just tell them we left yn's id back at the beach house," he replies, confidence lacing his voice.

you furrow your brows in confusion as the conversation steers toward the topic of dessert. "what's with you guys and dessert?" you inquire, looking around at the group with a bemused expression.

jungwon grins, leaning back in his chair as he explains, "well, you see, dessert is the best part of any meal. and when it's free, well, it's even sweeter."

mina shrugs, letting out a laugh at your confused expression. "yeah, i mean, who doesn't love free dessert?" she chimes in, her eyes twinkling with amusement.

you can't help but chuckle at their enthusiasm, shaking your head in amusement. "fair enough," you concede, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "i guess i can't argue with that logic."

with everyone on board for the plan, you settle back in your seat, eagerly anticipating the sweet treat that awaits you at the end of the meal. after all, who could say no to free dessert?

as the waiter approaches their table, sunghoon leans in with a mischievous glint in his eye, flashing his most charming smile. "hey, is there any chance we could get some free dessert? it's my girlfriend's birthday today," he says, gesturing towards you with a playful wink.

the waiter's eyes light up with enthusiasm as he nods eagerly. "of course! happy birthday!" he exclaims, offering you a warm smile before dashing off to fetch the dessert.

as the waiter scurries away, the anticipation among the group grows palpable. sunghoon grins at you, excitement dancing in his eyes. "get ready for a sweet surprise, birthday girl," he whispers, his voice laced with excitement.

you can't help but laugh, feeling a mixture of amusement and nervous anticipation. "i can't believe you talked them into this," you reply, shaking your head in disbelief. "this is going to be hilarious."

across the table, yuna and mina exchange knowing glances, stifling giggles behind their hands. "i can't wait to see their faces when the entire diner starts singing," yuna whispers, her eyes sparkling with mischief.

as the minutes tick by, the anticipation mounts, and the group exchanges playful banter and speculation about what kind of dessert the waiter will bring out. finally, the waiter returns, carrying a decadent-looking dessert adorned with a flickering candle.

with a flourish, he sets the dessert down in front of you, offering another cheerful round of "happy birthday" as the entire diner erupts into applause.

on the way home, the group is abuzz with excitement, unable to contain their chatter about the day's silly antics. sunghoon leads the conversation, recounting each hilarious moment with animated gestures and infectious laughter.

"i still can't believe we convinced them it was your birthday," sunghoon chuckles, glancing at you with a playful grin. "that dessert was worth every bit of embarrassment."

yuna nods enthusiastically, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "and the look on everyone's faces when the whole diner started singing! priceless," she adds, shaking her head in fond remembrance.

mina joins in, her laughter echoing through the car. "i never knew free dessert could be so entertaining," she quips, casting a teasing glance at riki, who chuckles in agreement.

as the memories of the day's escapades continue to flow, the car fills with laughter and joy, each member of the group reliving their favorite moments and sharing in the camaraderie of the day. it's moments like these, filled with laughter and friendship, that make even the simplest of outings unforgettable.

a year later, the group gathers once again, this time to celebrate jake and sunghoon's college graduation. amidst the sea of graduation caps and gowns, the friends stand shoulder to shoulder, a testament to the bonds forged through years of shared laughter and unforgettable moments.

as they gather for a group photo, sunghoon pulls you close, his arm wrapped around your waist in a gesture of love and pride. "let's make sure to get a picture with the graduates," he whispers, his voice filled with excitement.

after a while you glance over at jake and sunghoon, who are beaming with pride as they pose for pictures with their families. "they look so happy," you murmur, your heart swelling with pride for your friends' achievements.

sunghoon's gaze softens as he looks at you and walks back to you, his eyes filled with love and admiration. "you'll be up there next year," he says, his voice brimming with confidence. "i can't wait to see you walk across that stage and receive your diploma."

you feel a rush of warmth at his words, grateful for his unwavering support and encouragement. "thank you," you whisper, leaning into his embrace.

as the celebrations continue, the group surrounds jake and sunghoon, showering them with congratulations and well-wishes. amidst the laughter and chatter, sunghoon's voice cuts through the noise, his words filled with hope and anticipation. "and when it's your turn next year, yn," he says, his voice ringing with pride, "i'll be right here, cheering you on every step of the way."

you meet his gaze, your heart swelling with love for the man by your side. with sunghoon's unwavering support and the love of your friends, you know that no challenge is too great, and that together, you can conquer anything that comes your way.

as the camera flashes, capturing the joyous moment with jake and sunghoon, riki sidles up beside you, a playful grin on his face. "can you believe we're next in line for this graduation gig?" he quips, nudging you gently.

you chuckle, enjoying the light-hearted banter with your friend. "i can't wait to see you in that cap and gown," you reply, a teasing glint in your eyes. "just don't trip on stage, okay?"

riki laughs, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "hey, i make no promises," he retorts, playfully nudging you back. "but seriously, it's going to be our turn soon. let's make the most of our last year, yeah?"

you nod in agreement, a sense of excitement bubbling in your chest at the thought of the year ahead. "absolutely," you agree, a smile tugging at your lips. "but no wild parties the night before graduation, okay? we don't want any hungover mishaps on stage."

riki raises an eyebrow, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "no promises," he says with a smirk, earning a playful shove from you.

as the day draws to a close and the sun begins to dip below the horizon, you find yourself reflecting on the bond you share with riki. through the twists and turns of college life, you've stood by each other's side, weathering storms and celebrating victories together.

sure, there may have been moments of uncertainty and confusion, but at the end of the day, your friendship with riki remains steadfast and true. he's more than just a friend; he's your confidant, your partner in crime, and your platonic soulmate.

as you look ahead to the future, you know that no matter where life takes you, riki will always be there, ready to lend a listening ear, share a laugh, or offer a shoulder to lean on. and as you embrace the warmth of his friendship, you can't help but feel grateful for the countless memories you've shared and the ones yet to come.

with riki by your side, the journey ahead may be filled with twists and turns, but one thing is for certain: as long as you have each other, you'll always find your way.

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r3linx · 3 months

Text

⇄ ◁◁ 𝚰𝚰 ▷▷ ↻ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ⁰⁰'²⁵ ━━●━━───── ⁰²'⁰⁸

╰┈➤ characters... •`HAYATO SUO´•.

˚₊·—̳͟͞͞♡ SYNOPSIS... silly smoker yn thinking she could get away with that nasty habit but suo catches her and yeah... lectures her?? ˚₊·—̳͟͞͞♡ WORDCOUNT...0,9k ˚₊·—̳͟͞͞♡ WARNINGS...: tw! smoker yn, suo quite literally licked your hand, sfw, fluff, comforting, slight angst [if u squint enough trust me you'll see it], nonbinary reader ˚₊·—̳͟͞͞♡ OTHER... reblogs, likes and requests are appreciated!

a/n: like i said. yeah. sorry i let my inner demons decide what i write and i really needed to do this cuz i want to quit smoking so bad and i need smth to give me reassurance >-< (also i didn't read the whole in the end, just finished it cuz i had a rough day and im lazy for that so im just posting it,sorry if there's any errors in it or sounds dumb sometimes)

birds chirping. everything quieted down around you, almost as if the world stopped spinning. the cold breeze brushed against your skin, leaving goosebumps scatter all over your arm. the sun almost disappeared on the horizon, making the sky glow with orange, yellow and different but incredibly warm and beautiful shades of pink.

knees pulled up to your chest, all alone in the whole school you sat outside on the cold, gray concrete stairs, ragged by time and weather. here and there weeds peeking out through the cracks which was already stomped on by others till it was barely visible.

‘finally.. some alone time, all I could wish for..’ no one to listen to, no one to talk to, no one to match their standards. just you and your own train of thoughts.

holding the roll of tobacco in-between your pointer and middle fingers, raising up it to your dry lips and taking a long, final puff. the cigarette slightly warming up the end of your fingers by its light but also leaving a nasty essence behind. then tossing it aside, nothing left in it as you watched the smoke still pouring out from it between the strands of thick grass.

you pressed out a long exhale from your lungs, this time letting your eyes flutter close and just for a quick moment trying to forget everything. your ears ringed louder and louder by each second, feeling like passing out then and there—

“hey.” you snapped you eyes open at the sudden voice. gentle, yet carrying a lot of depth in his tone. without a question or remark, the person simply just taking a seat next to you. ‘great..’ you huffed, following his movements with your eyes till he comfortable positioned himself beside you, now being on eye level with you. you said nothing. he remained silent.

“are you just gonna sit there?” you spit out, irritation filling up your blood to which the individual took a simple glance down to you lap, where your hand was resting.

“may i?” questioning, you couldn’t find the usual warmness in his words this time, instead replaced by bitterness. again, just before a reply could be formed, ghosting his hands over yours, placing it on his with care, bringing it up to his mouth. the one you held the cigarette with.

soft, lips. softer than yours at the moment. grazed the top of your hand, your knuckles, the end of your fingers -eyes widened, you watched him.. and so did he. not with a smile. his eyebrows lowered. his gaze abused your soul, piercing it through from the inside.- still, carefully but with stone hard determination, pressing a kiss to your hand. and another. the third, with somewhat open mouth. hot tongue joining his lips on your skin, just for a quick moment, taking in the taste of your skin. then lets your limb down, releasing from his grasp.

suo eyed your features with interest. taking note of your shocked state and crimson red color dancing across your cheeks, reaching up to your ears. his gaze still heavy on you, he tucked an unruly lock behind you reddened ear.

“just needed confirmation.” no explanation, no apologies. he wouldn’t apologize for a kiss on your hand, why would he?

“confirmation of?”

“of you still damaging your body.” he replied, patience running thin. he wasn’t born today to know and realize, seeing through all your lies and poker faces like it was thin paper, held up in front of the bright sun. “no need to for the poor acting of yours. ever since I first saw that between your fingers, you kept me on my toes.” you were aware of what he told you about smoking, it played on repeat all the time you lit the cigarette. but it was one time, no harm, right? or you thought. you weren’t aware of the fact how he knew your promise was a lie. the promise to quit it. the rumors echoed into his ear, you sitting here every single day after school, alone in your peace. alone, until this day.

looking everywhere but him, one of your legs started tapping on the ground, searching for a new and believable lie. your leg still shaking, he took your chin in his hand, forcing your eyes on him. his strong grip made you wince in discomfort, fear setting in as his face contorted into anger even more by now.

“your body isn’t fixated on it. you can change. but you don’t want to.”

“it’s not-”

“it is true! it is, goddamn!..” crows screeched as they flew up from the ground, high in the colorful sky as suo's voice ringed louder this time.

the sudden change made you flinch, now averting his gaze even if for yourself to make it less awkward.

“why can’t you try and rely on me?” the question shocked you to the core, how could he even- “let it be me what you’re fixated on.. be addicted to me..” the more he said, the more quiet he became at the end, you could almost see his usual put together behavior and expression crumbling away into nothing. instead, he too felt the atmosphere between the two of you change into a more deep and sensual one.

taken aback, you sat there in silence staring with a dumb expression, suo couldn't help but let a smile pass by his lips, now his arms snaking around your side, head resting on your soft shoulders. you let the sensation of his closeness consume you, relaxing yourself into his embrace.

"have faith in me.." with a final murmur suo found a warm place to rest his head in the crook of your neck.

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ 𓈈 ᵈᵒ ⁿᵒᵗ ᶜᵒᵖʸ, ᵐᵒᵈⁱᶠʸ ᵒʳ ᵘᵖˡᵒᵃᵈ ᵐʸ ʷᵒʳᵏ ᵃˢ ʸᵒᵘʳˢ!

#relin writes!! .ೃ࿔#wind breaker #suo hayato #suo hayato windbreaker #windbreaker #wind breaker x reader #windbreaker x reader #wind breaker x gn reader #wind breaker oneshot #wind breaker x y/n #wind breaker angst #wind breaker drabbles #hayato suo #suo x reader #suo hayato x reader #hayato suo x reader #wind breaker suo

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animehideout · 7 months

Text

LOVE IS THE MOST TWISTED CURSE OF THEM ALL

PART 11

Check out part 12 here

Gojo Satoru X Fem! Reader

warnings ⚠️: not proofread / abuse / SA just something vague not detailed.

a/n : I truly apologize for this late update, I was really unmotivated to rewrite it and I was struggling to find inspiration again, I'm sorry if this part didn't live up to your expectations but I read hope you like it though, I tried to make it longer but I ran out of ideas 🥹.

Music Suggestion 🎧

Satoru stood tall, alone in the balcony, his gaze fixated on the sky, lost in the depth if his own thoughts. The weight of regret hung heavy upon his shoulders, a burden he could no longer bear.

His mind played your last fight that night on loop, making him hate himself even more. He remembered his harsh words, actions and disrespect towards you. Forcefully shutting his eyes to make those images and voices that's been haunting him go away.

Unwelcomed thoughts yet impossible to ignore. Blaming himself over and over again for what happened to you, torturing himself to madness.

"It's my fucking fault" he muttered,

In all that darkness, the image of your face in his mind was the only source of light. The delicate curve of your smile whenever you were around your students etched in his memory. He remembered the way you slept, features softened by the gentle embrace of your slumber, your passion for teaching and your daily excitement to show your students a new weapon and new technique.

You were a vision of peace amidst the chaos he was living. He realized then how life became emptier after your disappearance, the void your absence had left in every bit of his life. He realized how much he fell for you, he realized that hatred was deeply buried by the birth of his love for you.

With a heavy heart, he bowed his head, his eyes brimming with unshed tears. For three days, his eyes wide open, unable to sleep without you under the same roof as him, cuddling a piece of your clothing every single night to take into your scent, to pretend that you were there, next to him.

Clutching his fists, his knuckles turned white , whispering a plea for forgiveness, a forgiveness he might never receive.

"I'm sorry Y/n.."

. ..

"Satoru?"

"Y-yaga sensei?" said Gojo wiping his tears away,

"Can I join you?"

"Y-yeah sure"

"What's on your mind? Still blaming yourself?"

"Do I have anything else to do except blaming myself?"

"I'm sorry for your loss Satoru" said Principal Yaga apologetically,

"I didn't lose her, she's still out there, somewhere! I know it, I'm sure of it, I can feel it"

"Pain is eating you up Satoru, you know you should let go already–"

"Let go? Easier said than done. How can all of you let go so fast as if she never existed?" he said in annoyance

"The higher ups orders, to not distract the sorcerers' focus from their daily tasks"

"Bullshit, –"

"Satoru I understand your pain"

"No you don't, none of you does! I did this to her, I built the wall between both of us brick by brick till it collapsed on both of us, she got abducted by Toji and here I am suffering everyday.. I just wish I can turn back time and undo the damage I had done"

"Is this because of regret or something else?" asked Principal Yaga

Gojo looked down, not sure of what to say, mastering the courage he finally spoke,

"I– I love her, sensei! I love Y/n so much, I just hope it's not too late to realize this because I really want to fix everything–"

Yaga sensei looked at Gojo with a reassuring yet sad smile, deep down, everyone accepted that you died except Gojo., and he didn't want him to hang on fake hope.

"Satoru–"

"I know what you're about to say, but I won't let go, I won't give up even if the higher ups chain me down.... I thought she was a curse when we got married but I think I am her curse, I was her curse while she was my blessing–"

"I hope you're right Satoru, I hope she's still out there as you said, I hope you get a second chance to be a real family"

...

*In Mei Mei's room*

"Look at this" said Maki her eyebrows frowning in confusion,

"Who's that in the picture?" asked Nobara as confused as Maki,

Both of them examined the photograph, their eyes flickered between the picture and each other in silence. In the picture a woman smiled serenely as she cradled a baby in her embrace.

Maki shrugged equally perplexed,

"I have no idea, do you think it's a family member?"

Their senses were on high alert as they scanned every corner of her room for any sign of wrongdoing, something out of the ordinary. They found that picture tucked under her bed after they flipped the mattress while searching for anything suspicious.

"And this stack of money? Didn't know she's got all of this cash here" added Nobara.

"And this box as well"

Intrigued, they opened it. As they lifted the lid of the box, a firegun revealed itself, its metallic surface gleaming ominously in the dim light.

"A g-gun?" started Nobara as she looked at Maki in shock, "what would she use it for?"

"Definitely not hers, why would a sorcerer with a jujutsu technique depend on a gun" she pointed out.

"Good point, so if its not hers then to whom does it belong to?" asked Nobara

"There's only one way to figure it out, but now let's take the gun, the damn photograph and get out of here" said Maki as she put he mattress in its place again.

.....

"GOJO-SENSEI" called Nobara out as she caught a glimpse of Gojo in the balcony "Sensei you need to see this"

"Hm? Nobara? Maki?"

"Gojo" said Maki as she saw Gojo with principal Yaga in the balcony "We found something–"

but before she could finish her sentence,

"Any news?" interrupted Mei Mei as she stepped in the balcony out of nowhere..

Maki and Nobara exchanged quick nervous glances, their eyes darting between each other as they attempt to maintain composure. Hiding what they took from her room behind their backs. Their expressions strain with the effort to appear nonchalant, but a subtle tension lingers in the air. Lips pressed into strained smiles,

"Nah nothing new" said Maki while Nobara nodded in agreement.

"Hm you sure about that? I thought I heard you said you found something, is it about Y/n? " asked Mei raising her eyebrows,

"What if we did? Is it really your concern?" exclaimed Maki offensively, only to get elbowed softly by Nobara,

"We found nothing important Mei Mei sensei, of course if we did we'd tell you" exclaimed Nobara, chuckling awkwardly.

"Oh alright then girls," she said luckily not giving too much important to the girls, then paused and drifted her gaze towards Gojo, "how are you holding up Gojo? I hope you're in the process of moving on" she added

Gojo's eyes burned holes in her soul, but he tried to remain calm,

"I'm fine"

"That's what all of us would like to hear, glad you let go" she said and then excused herself to go to her room,

Then moment she left, Maki ran towards Gojo and Yaga, showing them what they found,

"We found these–"

"WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET THESE FROM?" snapped Gojo unexpectedly, his eyes widened as he snatched the gun and photograph form Maki's hands,

"Damn Satoru what's got into you, relax!" exclaimed Yaga-sensei,

"W-we.." stuttered Nobara

"How did you get these? they were well hidden"

"Well hidden under Mei Mei's bed?" asked Maki in confusion

"What? what did you just say?" said Gojo and Yaga in union

"We found these under Mei Mei's bed, the gun hidden in a box , tucked beside that photograph and a pile of cash, do you possibly know to whom it belongs?"

"These belong to Toji Zenin" said Satoru

Maki and Nobara froze in place, trying to process what Gojo just said,

"T-toji?" they said in disbelief,

"This gun was used by Toji to murder Riko Amanai, and these in the picture are Megumi and his mother–" explained Yaga sensei

"It can only be one thing" expressed Gojo through gritted teeth, "She must be behind it" he added and started walking away, thinking about confronting her,

"GOJO STOP!" yelled Yaga sensei, holding Gojo in place, "What's happened to your common sense? vanished?"

"We can't assume anything now sensei!" said Nobara

"So all of this isn't enough to assume that she's got some dirty work with Toji Zenin going on behind our backs?" said Gojo aggressively

"Okay you're right, it is suspicious but we need a plan! a proper plan, do you think she'll admit it if you confront her? she'll find a lie and you'll never find the truth, not out of her! We need to know more about her first" explained Maki

"Know what?" asked Gojo impatiently

"I mean, Toji has nothing right? not even a house, do you think if he'd take Y/n to a hotel room after abducting her? Mei Mei must have provided a place for him" she added

"So if we can't ask her, how would we know?" asked Nobara,

"We ask her best friend" Suggest Maki shrugging,

....

"Is it ringing?" asked Yaga sensei,

"Yeah shh it is" said Gojo waiting for her to pick up the phone, "–Oh hello" he said through the phone

"Gojo? Hi what's up calling me late at night, is everything okay?"

"Utahime, yeah everything is fine, we just need you here, if it's possible can you make here in one hour at least?"

"Well I can, but is it an emergency?"

"Um it's– it's about Mei Mei, we're preparing a party for her and we need your help"

"A party? It's not even her birthday yet–"

"It's for her service, it's a habit here in Jujutsu High to hold a party for a teacher to honor them, and this time it's Mei Mei, she did a lot for us and for the school, besides it's the higher ups orders so..."

"Oh the higher ups? sure then I'll be there in an hour"

"Don't tell Mei Mei that you're coming though, it must remain a surprise, now we don't wanna spoil it"

"So should be meet outside the school?"

"Sure yeah, you can come to my house?!"

"Oh alright then, I'll be there"

With that they hung up the phone,

"She'll be here in one hour, I hope we can get her to talk"

"I hope she's not part of Mei Mei's plan though" Said Nobara.

"Don't you think we must tell the others? Maybe we need some backup?" suggested Maki

"Yeah, but some of them need to stay here to keep an eye on Mei Mei" said principal Yaga

"Alright, I'll go and tell them then,"

*Time skip, at Gojo's house*

They sat there, Gojo, Nanami, Maki and Megumi waiting for Utahime's arrival.

"You've got a nice and big house" pointed Maki

"Yeah but never a happy house" mumbled Gojo to himself,

"Do you think she'll tell us more about her?" asked Megumi and suddenly the bell rang,

"I guess we'll find out now!" said Nanami,

...

"So Utahime, I hope you corporate!" started Gojo not wasting any precious second,

"Corporate? you make it sound like if we're discussing business, and not preparing for a surprise party! it's a p-party right?"

she chuckled nervously,

"Not really! you need to tell us more about Mei Mei, some information that we don't know about"

"wait? what?" she asked nervously

"Is she meeting someone? did she tell you about something?"

"Gojo wait! why are you asking about this? I mean she lives there in the school dorms as well, so I guess you know more than I do"

"I don't think so, she's you're best friend she must have told you something about her plan?" said Maki

"Plan? what plan?"

"Ah come on Utahime dont play dumb"

"No for real! what plan, I thought you had a plan with her , Gojo to push Y/n away!"

"What? NO. I'm talking about her dirty plan with Toji"

"Toji? wait what's going on?" she said truly confused

"STOP LYING AND ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION, IF YOU'RE PART OF HER DIRTY GAME I'LL END BOTH OF YOU" exclaimed Gojo angrily, making Utahime step back, growing more and more impatient.

"Hey hey Gojo calm down, what's wrong with you? I understand you're frustrated but that's not the right way to find answers!" said Maki and the others nodded in agreement,

"Megumi please take him to the balcony while me and Maki handle this, he needs to calm down" suggest Nanami,

Megumi did as he said and took Gojo to get some fresh night air,

"Geez, you really developed anger issues, you were more laid back even in risky situations Gojo" started Megumi

"Not anymore, people change and I've changed"

"Y/n sensei is dear to all of us, so I am eager too to know where she is, and I truly understand how you feel"

"No Gumi, you don't, you don't understand because I'm not just sad, I'm feeling extremely guilty, because it's my damn fault"

"I'm feeling guilty too" said Megumi lowering his head,

"Hm? what for ? you're pretty close to Y/n and you're good friends not only a student and his teacher–"

"It's my father, he's the one who abducted her and only God knows what he's doing to her, I don't wanna even think about it. Is there any greater shame than this?" he said his voice cracking,

"Hey Megumi! look at me, your father's actions has nothing to do with you, he's the one who abducted her not you! you've always been nice and kind to Y/n. Sometimes family does things that we are ashamed of and completely in opposition of it but it doesn't mean we're like them just because we're related by blood, you are what you're truly in here" he said and pointed at Megumi's heart "And I know well what's in there Megumi! I raised you and I've seen you grow up to be a loyal, strong and kind hearted man! you're the complete opposite of your father so don't ever compare yourself to him again" said Gojo with a smile,

"If it's his fault, then why are you blaming yourself Gojo?"

"Because I'm the reason she left that night! I've said too many hurtful words, no one can handle to hear, no one deserves to hear but I was too agitated, too overwhelmed by my mixed feelings, trying to push her away from me over and over again–"

"Why? why'd you push her away from you? couldn't you have tried at least? maybe after what you've been through you were destined to finally find happiness with her! "

"My heart was a messy place to make it a comfortable place for her!"

"Was? so what changed now?"

"I want to try to make it comfortable for both of us, I want t-t to– nevermind! I have to find her, I have to make it up for her"

"I understand and we will find her, Y/n is strong I'm sure she's safe wherever she is" reassured Megumi, trying to lift Gojo's spirit again,

....

"So Utahime, we really need you to corporate so you better put that bestie thing with Mei Mei aside cuz this is a life or death matter!" begun Maki,

"D-death?"

"Toji escaped and we think that Mei Mei had a hand in this" added Nanami

"No way! Why would Mei Mei do that? I mean you know what Toji had done to the Jujutsu world!"

"We know, but we know that when people are full of hate are full of unexpected things!"

"Nanami what's wrong? what happened?"

"It's Y/n! Toji abducted her, and we found Toji's gun under Mei Mei's bed, even though it was well hidden.. do you still think she's got nothing to do with that?"

Her eyes wide open in shock and disbelief, her mouth hanging open, sad expressions drawn on her face,

"W-what? I didn't know I swear to God! I've – I've never thought it will go that way, I've never thought she could fall this far" she expressed her feelings, her heart crushing, she's never expected her long time best friend would do or be part of such thing, to betray the Jujutsu community.

"That's why we need your help! You know how important Y/n is to our world! we can't lose her" said Nanami "So please if you know anything, any place she owns, any small details tell us, we really need to know"

With a deep breath, she started thinking, trying to remember if Mei Mei told her anything,

"I remember she bought a house! but that was weeks ago!!"

"A house?"

"Yeah, she said she might settle in Tokyo if things went well between her and Gojo–"

"She's truly delusion" interrupted Maki rolling her eyes,

"Where is this house?" asked Nanami

"I'll take you there" said Utahime determined to help.

Despite being best friends with Mei Mei, her morals were more important! she's too loyal to the Jujutsu World and committed to the greater good, she knows about the prophecy and she can't afford to witness another loss on the Jujutsu community part.

"I'll go and tell Gojo and Megumi then– maybe Y/n is there"

.......

[ Kill her, and I'll bring your cash tomorrow when I see her lifeless body ]

Read Toji through the message that he received,

"See! I'm ordered to kill you now! How much trouble did you cause her for her to free me from the prison just to torture you and kill you" he said with a smirk

"F-fuck you and fuck her" you said through gritted teeth as you were thrown on the floor, your body hurting from the chains that were tied around your wrists and feet.

your lips and nose bleeding after hours of tortures,

"And you still got that attitude, after being beaten up? If I were you I wouldn't act so brave.."

"You'll never be me Toji! we're both considered inferior in the Jujutsu world but I learned how to be the real me and not what others want me to be, I didn't let others to order me around and kill people–"

"Are you trying to save yourself? and convince me to not kill you"

"no, I know I can't be saved, not just now but for a long time ago, but you know the funny thing is that we actually have something else in common beside being monkeys" you joked offensively trying to get on his nerves, you're going to die anyway so why'd you not offend him, you were tired if being stepped on so why not talk back.

"what?" he said in anticipation as he kneeled down,

"Both our families are disappointed in us, I disappointed my parents and you disappointed your son, Megumi, nice kid he's nothing like you–"

"M-megumi?"

And you struck a sensitive nerve in him,

You started laughing when you saw his face dropped and his expressions changed, your stomach hurts whenever you laughed he probably had broken some of yours ribs.

The you paused,

"Do it Toji. Do what you were assigned for, no one will come to my rescue anyway, do it, kill me" you said in a serious tone,

"Change in plan, let me have my fun with you before I take the light out of your eyes"

"You still have time for fun? the dawn will break soon–"

"Oh I know princess, don't you worry about it, I know I can't delay the sunlight but I know how to make the night even more darker... and you were right, Megumi's probably disappointed in me but lemme tell you something–" he paused and leaned forward, his face a few inches away from yours "That's who I truly am, a beast that preys on the weak, and you are weak Y/n no matter how hard you try to come off as strong"

he said and he reached to take off your shirt,

Your heart beats quickened, you thought he'd torture you in another way, and not attempt to do something filthy to you,

"No -no! I'd rather die" you said trying your best to break free from his grasp, but his huge body got you pinned down,

"What? you're not a fan of big guys? or your pathetic ass is loyal to a husband who's never paid attention to your existence?" he said looking you deep in the eyes, his huge hands circling around your neck, posing pressure on it,

You couldn't deny the pain and disappointment you felt. You really hoped Gojo would appear and save you, you wished he cared for you. You couldn't deny that you wanted Gojo; your husband to be your first time and not with someone who would brutally kill you after taking what he wants.

You'd die even before he kills you.

"no don't " you whispered, loosing your voice as his grip around your neck tightened, making it hard to breathe.

....

"GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HER"

All what you can feel is the weight of Toji's body being removed from on top of you.

Toji's body forcefully thrown on the ground, your blurry eyes trying to focus on the figure standing right in front of you, slowly approaching you,

"Damn baby what did he do to you?" he said softly, softly brushing his finger over your bleeding lip.

"S-satoru, y-you came!" you whispered, your vision darkening and ears ringing,

"Of course I'm here with you, Y/n! Y/N !!!!!no no Y/N WAKE UP" he yelled as he held you in his arms.

....

Your eyes slowly fluttered opened, your surroundings sharpening into details again, gulping with difficulty.

A serum attached to your vein,

"Sensei" said Yuji "Guys she's awake"

With that all of them circled around the bed you were laying on, their eyes look directly at you, greeting you with sincere smiles.

"How are you feeling?" asked Megumi.

You tried to leave the bed but they forced you to lay back. You looked around scanning the place, you were in the hospital, Shoko must have treated your wounds, everyone was there except your husband, Satoru.

Tag list ✨

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@olivianyx

223 notes · View notes

alicerosejensen · 8 months

Text

Find me pt.1

Warning: kidnapping, mention of blood, two-person narrative (Leon v reader), castle with bioweapons, angst, trauma, dark, forced relationships, hints of sexual violence.

Summary: half a year. That’s exactly how long it took Leon to get on your trail and try to find you. He is ready to do anything to get you back, but hope fades every day.

A/N: I'll probably still post this when I get inspired. The warnings will vary depending on each chapter. You can think of this story as a big reference to another Capcom game.

I apologize for any mistakes because English is not my native language.

Feedback is welcome, but no insults please.

Prologue here.

His eyes closed by themselves from lack of sleep when Leon looked at the received data, which for him is now equal to the treasure, or more precisely, the key to the treasure is to you. Ingrid said that this could turn out to be a false trail, the threads that he had been looking for for so long turned out to be either a waste of time, or led to a dead end stopping the whole thing. And only now, six months later, a single clue that appeared literally out of nowhere makes you drop everything and try to find you.

Hannigan looks at the audio file trying to determine whether it is a fake or not. She runs it through a lot of programs trying to make sure that it's not gluing while Leon is standing next to her, clutching the back of the chair she was sitting at.

"Tell me this is a real recording," the tone of his voice was almost pleading and at the same time scared as he heard your recorded crying over and over again.

"Yeah." Hannigan's hesitant voice made Leon lower his head and look at the woman who continued to click her fingers on the keyboard.

"Hannigan?"

"We don't know when this recording was made…Maybe it's a trap. Another false trail that will lead nowhere. We've checked everything Leon! We found a car with DNA traces, but the trail ended. There were no witnesses, no recordings from the cameras, it was as if she had fallen through the ground."

Leon froze. The arguments were weighty, but what does he have besides this record?

"What's the point of being trapped after six months?" He sees Ingrid biting her lip trying to squeeze out as much data as possible. "If this was a kidnapping for ransom or luring me out, they would immediately get in touch, but nothing. So it wasn't me or the money that was needed, but my wife."

"However, we have not been able to find a motive. I checked all the documents, passport, parents, records from the hospital where y/n was born - there is nothing that could give us a tip. It's all clear."

"Or we don't see something," he sighed.

Leon was sure that something was missing. But it was not on the surface, but somewhere in the depths, which is not so easy to get to. When he was informed about the shots in his house and found a mess with a syringe lying on the floor, he really had hope that he would be contacted very soon. He waited a week, then a second without leaving the search, because with the current level of technology it is impossible to completely cover up all traces so that they lead nowhere, and in the end Ingrid quickly found a car with traces of your hair and drops of blood on the back seat, but that was it. You became one of those who mysteriously went missing.

But no one asked for money, no one sent any extortionate emails or calls. At one point, Hannigan even put forward the theory that you could have initiated your abduction yourself, but he refused to believe it. Why would you leave like that if you could just break up with him, even though on the day you left, Leon was ready to swear that everything was fine between you.

So it just didn't make sense.

Leon speaks softly. He is pacing the room, waiting for additional information, at least from where this recording was sent to him. The sound of the keys echoes in his head and Leon rubs his face tiredly, stopping his gaze at your photo.

"There was a drug in the syringe, there was her blood on the needle and on the floor, in total two shots were fired from the Matilda, one into the closet and the other into the ceiling... traces of a struggle..." Leon quietly wondered out loud, trying to understand what he could have missed, but it seems more there was nothing left that he could grab onto.

"Leon?" Ingrid suddenly called and Leon was next to her in one sharp movement. “I think I found it!”

A map and tracked coordinates appeared on the screen, presumably from the place where the recording with your request for help was sent.

"This..."

“Not low beam”

Leon twitched anxiously, seeing the designated forest area, looking meaningfully at Hannigan, who rested her chin on her hand, not believing what she found. At one time, intelligence discovered Ashley in a godforsaken Spanish village, but she was kidnapped with the aim of infecting her with a plaga and sending her to Graham, and what Leon saw on the map defied any logic. How did you end up in a mountain range in another country?

“This is Leon’s mistake. There is nothing there, mountains and forest, another mistake, someone made a cruel joke.”

“Not if there is any hint of civilization there.”

It was an unnecessary risk. Hannigan is still trying to find at least some information about the nearest village in these places. On the one hand, it’s an ideal place to hide a person, but on the other hand, there are no guarantees that you will end up there and that Leon won’t go to hell in a meaningless search. Suddenly you have been dead for a long time, although Ingrid’s female intuition tells her that until he finds your body or at least clear evidence of your death, Leon will continue to sniff out the trail of his beloved, like a devoted bloodhound, even if there are no traces left.

You are not the daughter of the president, only the forces of Leon and Hannigan are sent to search for you, the latter helps him only out of the kindness of her heart, and no one will send reconnaissance to find at least something that indicates that you were even really in this place. But Leon worked as an agent for too long, he saw the underside of this world and in theory assumed that there might be a house or village in which you are being kept for some unknown reason, but even if it’s all a trap and you are bait, then Leon is ready to go there.

"Nothing, Leon," Hannigan's annoyed voice must cut off hope. He himself sees no signs of human life on the screen. “No one even reports missing people in populated areas”

“I don’t have anything else anyway, right?” he answers confidently, taking his phone to get the exact coordinates “The fact that there is nothing on the map and no one reported missing tourists means nothing. There are places that someone hides very well.”

“This is your personal mission… I won't be able to help you there. I can book tickets, find someone to help with the weapons, but no outside support. You'll be on your own there.” Ingrid drawled sadly, hoping that he would come to his senses or at least weigh everything again before taking an unjustified risk, "You don't know what awaits you there, perhaps there is nothing there except trees, wild animals and mountains. Let's check it out again?!"

"For six months!" he exclaimed, "I've been trying for six months as a bloodhound to find at least something that can shed light on the kidnapping of my fiancee. I have the coordinates and her message for help, which you yourself confirmed was not falsified. Even if I can't find anything, I'll at least try. She wasn't taken away for money or to get back at me… there's something else there, and if she's there…" Leon poked his finger at the monitor, "then she's completely alone there. Defenseless and vulnerable to any danger if they want to harm her."

There was an oppressive silence. It was useless to convince Leon to wait at least a little longer before rushing headlong for a single straw, but she had already delayed him enough. All Hannigan could do for him was squeeze out any crumbs of information about the area, record it, and help with the equipment. At least the technical component. And if they both believed in God, they could pray for a successful return.

"Allright, have it your way." she spread her hands in surrender.

The awakening was painful and difficult. However, between brief glimpses of wakefulness that quickly ended with another dream, you could feel Leon's gentle touches all over your body. His breath on your neck and lips was like an apologetic kiss. You tried to dodge, as you usually did in the morning when you were still asleep, but he was persistent, after which you vaguely heard laughter through the veil… Heavy, broken, unlike Leon's usual laugh. Random images flashed before your eyes, and the last thing that made you fully wake up was the bang of your head on the floor and the sound of a gunshot, after which you abruptly opened your eyes, looking straight at the dark ceiling, trying to figure out what happened.

Tick tock tick tock

The sound of the clock ticking filled the space, remaining for a while the only thing your mind could focus on. Your head was pounding painfully as you stared madly at the dial, standing a few meters away from you, barely discerning what time it was. The lump on your forehead throbbed unpleasantly and may have caused a concussion after that bastard hit your head on the floor with all his might so that you lost consciousness. Feeling with your fingers the place where the skin painfully swelled, you painfully hissed down immediately removing your hand, stopping it and tried to breathe deeply trying to put the latest events in chronological order.

However, nausea rolled in waves, forcing you to squeeze the bedclothes in your hands and finally realize that the environment in which you are unfamiliar.

A dark room lit by a single fireplace in which a fire was still burning warmed the space making it less frightening, but the pouring moonlight from the window made the soul shrink from the horror of the unknown. You slowly looked around realizing that you were lying on a huge bed with a giant canopy of a delicate green shade on silk bedding of the same color. Everything seemed so unreal. As if it were a nightmare and now someone will jump out from around the corner at you and you will wake up realizing that nothing terrible really happened, but after sitting on the bed in one position for several minutes without moving in the hope of waking up, in the end you realized that you were no longer sleeping.

Your eyes involuntarily began to look at paintings by unknown artists. A portrait of a woman sitting at a small table with a human skull on it, an aristocrat with noble features as if carved out of stone, ordinary landscapes… You put your feet down on the cold stone floor, immediately shuddering and slowly wandered to the window to understand your location, but all you saw outside was an endless forest area without a hint of roads.

Listening to other sounds besides the annoying knocking of the clock and the fire, you hugged yourself by the shoulders, thinking that it was definitely not worth shouting just yet. The room you were in was clearly made in the Gothic style and in the current situation it only caused discomfort, given the fact that upon closer examination of the paintings you were able to understand that in front of you were originals and not reproductions. Old Varnish should have been removed a long time ago, perhaps it made these stories less dark, but this is clearly not something that should be thought about now. Turning around in search of some kind of closet to throw on something warm, you could see clothes neatly laid out on a dusty chair: a white shirt with wide cuffs tapered at the wrist, which was probably worn with a short tapered floral pink vest without sleeves, reminiscent of a corset with lacing on the chest, dark trousers and elegant boots next to them that look like they are made of real leather. The sole is small but looks comfortable and is just your size.

Examining the clothes in your hands, it was impossible not to notice the quality of the fabric, for the shirt was clearly silk, and besides, next to it, on an elegant carved table, someone had carefully left a metal box with decoration and a fresh red rose, which until recently seemed , bloomed in some garden, filling the air with its aroma.

You lowered your hands, taking the box in your hands, carefully opening it, as if a spider or other crawling crap might jump out of it, which always filled you with uncontrollable horror, but nothing catastrophic happened. Inside was a cameo brooch, decorated along the edge with fifty small stones resembling diamonds, and at the bottom hung a drop of pearls. Leon once gave you something similar, but it was in no way comparable to what was now in your hands. It was clearly worth your year's salary. It’s not like you had a choice… in the corner of the room, of course, there was a chest of drawers, but you couldn’t find anything in it except snow-white sheets, and you didn’t really want to walk around in negligence. Considering the fact that you were given no choice and that at least the clothes looked comfortable, you decided to comply, scared by the fact that everything fit perfectly as if it was tailor-made for you. You even caught the brooch on your vest because someone probably left it here on the table on purpose.

“Well, at least I feel a little better,” you thought, sighing as you found the mirror. The lack of light made it difficult to judge how bad the bump on his forehead was, but perhaps that was for the best. There were still no footsteps or sounds in the room behind the wooden door, but so you quickly put your hair in a not-so-neat bun so that it wouldn't get in the way while you explored the area and tried to figure out what happened to you after you were attacked and left here.

Perhaps you should find a phone and contact Leon or the police directly… There must be some connection, right? Looking back again, trying not to pay attention to the slight dizziness and nausea, your gaze lingered on a metal plate hanging directly above the fireplace with some kind of inscription engraved on it, but you did not look at it or at other objects in the room. . Not now… all that mattered at that moment was to find someone or something that would help you navigate and call for help.

With a soft tread, almost quietly like a cat, you pushed the door forward and it gave way, making a slight creak, forcing only to pray that it would not attract unnecessary attention, your head poked out looking around. Cold stone walls like in a medieval castle pressed down on consciousness, the wind blew down the gloomy corridor so that even clothes did not save too much and you wanted to throw some kind of jacket on top, but you took a step forward rejoicing that there are familiar lamps here, even if they shine a little badly, but it was better than if there were candles here.

However, the candelabra here were also really empty. When you were completely out in the hallway, you couldn't figure out which way to go to the right or to the left. It was too dark on the left and you wanted to go there the least, so you wandered in the direction where the wind was blowing, listening carefully to everything, trying not to fall off any stairs, although it was not very bright here, but still your eyes could distinguish the situation well and in the end you went down somewhere to a single door. Pulling the handle, it turned out that the door was closed on the other side and except for the old junk lying under the stairs, overgrown with cobwebs in places, there was nothing, which obviously made you turn around and go upstairs again, turning into that dark corridor where you initially did not want to go, but it seems that the choice was small.

Of course, you could go back to the bedroom and wait for a miracle or trouble, the latter seemed like a more obvious scenario, but still you can't leave everything on its own, even if you find yourself in the most non-standard of all situations. Eventually, after passing through the already familiar room again, you breathed a sigh of relief when you realized that the corridor was not at all as long as it initially seemed, and the door at the end was fortunately unlocked and led you to some long well-lit balcony. Your heart was beating wildly from fear of the unknown, but you still walked forward with your hand on your chest, walking to the other end, passing by some more locked rooms, stopping only at the moment when you clearly noticed a bright scarlet stripe on the floor as if something was being dragged… … like a corpse, and the red streak seems to be blood. Your feet were rooted to the ground as you looked around in a panic, looking for potential danger. Despite the disgusting silence, no one was nearby or someone simply did not want to be noticed earlier than expected, so at your own risk you decided to follow the bloody trail that ended abruptly. There were stains on the floor as if someone had tried to wash them earlier, perhaps they didn’t have time to do it or… Well, Leon always said that you have a rich imagination, which no one from your family ever argued with, so you decided not to give it free rein just yet because that otherwise it will drive you crazy.

It was all just disgusting. You realized for sure that you were in some kind of castle or giant mansion that clearly needed cleaning in places, and the worst thing was that all the rooms here practically remained locked. After an hour of wandering through the dark corners, you were damn cold and lost in addition, despite the fact that you found nothing and could not go anywhere except a couple of chambers, although mice ran through there a couple of times and spiders wove a web in the corners, which horrified you, forcing you to quickly slam the door and scream several times. No one really showed up. On the one hand, it was calming, but on the other it was aggravating.

You need at least some kind of map to figure out which part of the building you're in at all, but all you've found is useless trash and increased anxiety. Breathing exercises generally helped, which was why you were on the verge of hysteria. There must be at least a landline phone here! Panic was rolling in and my eyes started to water, I just wanted to call Leon and beg him to take you away from here because every rustle or shadow made you jump on the spot. And if someone really chases you? Where to run to? You don't have a mountain of muscles like Chris Redfield and you're not even Leon's equal. Your brain was clearly no longer trying to think of any plan, and it was at this moment that somewhere in the distance you heard a clock tinkling. It was dark outside, you couldn't see a thing, which made you think it might be midnight.

Startled, you looked around again and still decided to follow the sounds, hoping that they would not lead to your death. Another dark corridor gave way to a lighter one, which led you to a wide oak carved door, which made you even momentarily happy as you entered the wide hall with snow-white marble columns and an almost mirrored floor where a mosaic in the shape of a sun was laid out in the middle of the hall. Everything was luxurious and at the same time forgotten, but the clock that brought you here with a loud blow really showed midnight and it was a real antique! You were ready to swear to God that such a miracle could only be bought by a wealthy well-connected collector. Nearby there were several tables similar to those in your room, and although they were very dusty, in the vases that stood on them smelled sweetly of fresh flowers.

It wasn’t so gloomy here anymore, which helped relax a little. With sincere curiosity, you looked at everything that lay on the tables, and would like to turn the porcelain figurines of animals in your hands, something like this always caught you, causing memories to come flooding back against your will, how during your travels Leon could not tear you away from the souvenir shop where you emptied his card with great generosity, but this was not the case. And although you kept your eyes glued to everything you saw, your feet carefully walked down the steps until you stopped dead in your tracks when you heard loud clapping of hands.

You looked up at the source of the sound but didn't see anyone, however…

"So you've already woken up, my dear?"

185 notes · View notes

harque · 6 months

Text

" always "

summary ੭୧ 0.9k — SFW you both were changed by the abyss. some days are easier than others.

features — gn!reader, established relationship, angst (a lot), hurt/comfort, blood, miscommunication, self deprecation, implied depression, cuddling

“And rest is sweet, when laurelled fame

Will crown the soldier’s crest;

But, a brave heart, with a tarnished name,

Would rather fight than rest.”

— Emily Brontë

You sleep alone.

You knew you would sleep alone from the moment you entrusted your heart to him. All you had to do was take one look into those dark blue eyes to see it. To understand despite the two of you being in love, Ajax would never hold you as firmly as he holds the hilt of his sword. He would never crave you the same way he craves bloodstained teeth or bruised skin, because that was the nature of a warrior.

You knew this and accepted it for what it was.

Ajax would never leave you, but he would be gone.

Maybe there should be a bitterness in you, knowing that. Something pushing you to sob or scream or fight for his rightful place to be by your side instead. But there is only—

(“It’s fine,” he said, lips shivering blue and staring blankly at the forest ahead. “If you want to back out now, I won't stop you.”)

—love. There should be bitterness, yes. But there isn’t. You admire him. So when you see him in the doorway—his tall figure silhouetted by the bright white landscape behind him—your only thought is to make him smile.

(“Look at you! All worn out and cold. Let's get you warmed up, shall we?”)

You take his gloved hand, pulling him into the warmth of the house. And there, you lavish him with kisses until he is red-faced with laughter. You love him. You love him, you love him, you love him. You love him, not because he was easy to love but because he was himself. Your most beloved Ajax, who was foolish and smiled like he never hurts.

He is staying with family this time.

He presses his lips against your forehead, murmuring an apology and promising to visit again when he can. The house is empty by nightfall.

You sleep alone.

You’ve made a lot of mistakes. You know you haven’t been the best partner at times, but tonight you want to be better. Ajax is finally home again.

You’re happy to see him! Although his voice is tense, and he brushes off any attempt of affection.

It’s okay, you think, even when you see how he is constantly on edge around you, as if he hadn't breathed comfortably in years—like he was somewhere else entirely.

(The abyssal depth he crawled away from lived in him now, gaping and yawning. You were the lucky one.)

He goes to sleep early. You sit by his side after dinner, and wonder how close is too close.

…

You want to be good today, you want to feel perfect. Ajax isn’t home. You remember the way his fingers fit neatly into yours like pieces of a puzzle.

You lie in bed for hours.

You sleep alone.

“I’m tired,” you cried to nobody at all, trying to wipe your stinging eyes, but the tears continued their wrathful march down your cheeks. “I’m so tired.”

The bed is cold.

You sleep alone.

If you were a stronger person, you would know what to do. You aren’t. You’re alone, and you don’t know anything. You haven’t talked to him normally in weeks. He’s here again, and somehow it's still like he never came back in the first pla—

“Hey.”

Your eyes flutter open.

Ajax is on top of the comforter, positioned right next to where you were blissfully sleeping. “You awake now?”

“Yeah,” you reply softly, trying to keep your voice steady.

All of a sudden, he pulls you into an embrace, wrapping his arm around your shoulder.

You want to cling to him, bury your face in his chest and never let go. But you hesitate, fearing that he might reject you again even though he was the one who initiated. Your hands hang limply at your side.

His hold moves past your shoulder and up into the tangled locks of your hair. Everything feels… real. Your breathing shallows until it stutters into a choked sob.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper, barely able to make the words come out. “I don’t want to lose you again.”

“I know,” he says gently, stroking your head. “I know, love. I’m not going anywhere.”

He’s a liar. You’ve seen him gaze listlessly at that damn forest for years, even when it was barely visible on the horizon. Sometimes, he is far away when he is right next to you. You fear the wounds of your shared past, how they are still sore to the touch like they happened yesterday. You dread the day he finds the battle he’s been looking for, because you know he will not come back.

That’s why you cry.

Deep down, you know he will never be satisfied, that he will always long for something bigger than whatever you—or the world itself—can offer. It’s terrifying.

You nestle your face into the crook of his neck, and say none of this.

You want to believe everything will be alright, that it will be different, that he will always come back. But you know better. You know better.

(“We’re just all kinds of fucked up, aren’t we?”

“That’s not funny,” you say, stifling a smile.)

He held you as your chest heaved with an inconsolable pain too big for your own body.

(Is it selfish to want all of him? Are you truly that bitter and lonely? Will it hurt like this forever?)

His heartbeat is an anchor.

You love him. You always will.

#✦﹐ fics #genshin angst #genshin impact x reader #gender neutral reader #tartaglia x reader #childe x reader #ajax x reader #genshin fanfic

105 notes · View notes

secret77778888 · 1 month

Text

Bless the telephone, a LUKOLALAND fan fiction.

DISCLAIMER: This is LUKOLALAND only. Do not read if you're not a shipper. This is PURELY FICTIONAL. No harm intended.

Nicola is sitting on her couch, exhausted after a long day of work. She flips through TV channels aimlessly, but nothing holds her attention. Her thoughts keep drifting back to Luke, and she can’t help but wonder how he’s been. With a sigh, she reaches for her phone and scrolls through Instagram, trying to distract herself and secretly about to rewatch videos and pictures of them together, remembering all the good times they had. He was her best friend, and she had never felt so close to anyone before. She felt so much better with him; he was so charming, so gentle, so generous. She wanted to look at his beautiful face, to feel his tall body close to hers. She catches herself—it’ll hurt again; she misses Luke enough already. As she’s about to put the phone down, it vibrates in her hand, and Luke’s name appears on the screen. Her heart skips a beat.

Meanwhile, Luke is at home. He has been staring at his phone for the last two hours, debating whether to call Nicola. He’s tried to write texts, but none seemed right. He misses her like crazy. With each day that passes, the pain has grown stronger, and lately, it has been even more difficult to ignore the void he feels without her in his life. Thinking about her has become a daily chore; everything reminds him of her. Just yesterday, someone wore the same perfume she used to wear, and he almost got whiplash trying to see if it was her. Everywhere he goes, everything he does, reminds him of her absence. He keeps thinking about all the time they spent together, missing her voice, her laugh, her humor, her eyes—oh, her eyes, how many times had he gotten lost in them, daydreaming about what could be. He wants to see her, to see her smile, to hug her close. What is she doing? Who is she with? He feels a pinch of jealousy he knows he has no right to. He needs her; he has to hear her voice now, at least. Despite his nerves, he knows he needs to hear her voice. Taking a deep breath, he finally dials her number.

Luke: softly Hello… Nicola.

Nicola: guarded, but soft Hi, Luke. It's been a while.

Luke: a pause, nerves tightening his chest Yeah, it has. I’ve been meaning to call... but I wasn’t sure if you’d even want to hear from me.

Nicola: a hint of vulnerability I wasn’t sure if I wanted to either... but I guess I needed to.

Luke: relieved but cautious Nicola, how have you been? I’ve missed you. More than I can say.

Nicola’s breath catches, and she tries to stay composed, but hearing him say those words stirs something deep within her. Luke feels his heart swell with hope as he hears her breathing, sensing that she feels the same, but he’s also terrified of pushing too hard.

Nicola: calmly I’ve been well. I’ve been busy Work is good health not so much but good.And I… I’ve missed you too... but things between us have been complicated, Luke. You know that.

Luke: earnestly, a mix of desperation and hope I know, Nicola, and I’m sorry. For all of it. For not being there when you needed me, for letting things get this messy. I never wanted to hurt you.

There’s a silence on the line, heavy with all the unsaid words, the unspoken apologies. Nicola closes her eyes, feeling the depth of his regret. Luke’s mind is racing, fearing that she might still be too hurt to forgive him, yet clinging to the hope that they can find a way back to each other.

Nicola: softly, still guarded It hurt, Luke. The way everything just... fell apart. I tried to focus on my work, to block it out, but it’s not that simple.

Luke: his voice cracking slightly, the weight of his emotions pressing down on him I know. And I don’t expect you to forgive me just like that. But I want to make things right. I want to show you that (he hesitates, searching for the right words) that we’re worth fighting for.

Nicola feels a tear slip down her cheek, but she quickly wipes it away. She wants to believe him, to trust that they can find their way back to each other, but fear holds her back. Luke’s heart pounds as he senses her hesitation. He knows he’s on the brink of either losing her for good or beginning to rebuild what they once had.

Nicola: softly I don’t know, Luke. I don’t know if it’s that simple.

Luke: more determined, yet gentle, his love for her driving every word It’s not. But I’m willing to do whatever it takes. I’ve been thinking... about everything, and I realized that I’ve been living my life in a way that isn’t true to what I really want. I can’t do that anymore, Nicola.

Nicola’s resolve begins to waver. She wants to say yes, to agree, but the fear of getting hurt again holds her back. Luke’s words hit her hard, he’s always been able to cut through her defenses like no one else.

Nicola: whispering: I trusted you; you know hard it is for me to open up. I thought that you wanted it to. It has been tough I don’t want to get hurt again, Luke.

Luke: pleading, his voice full of longing Neither do I. But I’m ready to take that risk, for us. I’m deeply sorry for how I've handled everything, I was foolish to do so. I can’t forgive myself for hurting you. I’ll make up for it. I was afraid that you would like to listen to my apologies. I thought that it was better to give you your space, I was trying to solve everything in the best way for everyone involved. I needed time. We have something Nic... something that doesn’t just go away, no matter how much time passes. I want to see where it can take us, if you’ll let me.

Nicola takes a deep breath, feeling the magnetic pull between them. She knows she’s not ready to jump back in, but she’s not ready to walk away either.

Nicola: softly Maybe... maybe we can try. But slowly, Luke. I need to take this slow. It’s too complicated right now and my career is my priority. I need to trust you again and this could take a long time.

Luke: relieved, his voice filled with cautious optimism Whatever pace you need, Nicola. I’ll follow your lead. Just... don’t shut me out. Let’s figure this out together.

She hesitates but she knows that deep inside she wants it too.

Nicola: with a hint of warmth Okay, Luke. Let’s see where this goes.

There’s a moment of silence, a mutual understanding passing between them. The distance between them seems to shrink, replaced by a fragile hope. Nicola knows they’ll be filming together soon, playing a married couple on screen. The thought both excites and terrifies her—being close to him again, pretending to be in love, when the feelings are anything but pretend. Luke’s mind is spinning with the same thoughts, the anticipation of seeing her, holding her hand, even if only for the camera, having her close. He’s more determined than ever to show her that he’s serious, that he’s willing to fight for her.

Luke: gently, almost hesitantly We’ll be seeing each other soon... for the filming.

Nicola feels her heart skip again. The thought of being near him, of those scenes they’ll have to play, stirs something within her that she’s not sure she’s ready to face.

Nicola: softly Yeah... we will. It’ll be... interesting, won’t it?

Luke: with a soft chuckle, but his voice tinged with sincerity To say the least. But maybe it’s what we need... to remind us of what we have.

Nicola can’t help but smile at his words, feeling a warmth spread through her chest. The idea of being near him again, of the connection they share, even through their characters, brings a sense of comfort. Luke feels a similar warmth, knowing that they’ll have this time together, that they’ll be able to reconnect, even if only through the safety of their roles.

After they hang up, Luke leans back in his couch, a mix of emotions swirling inside him. Relief, hope, and an undercurrent of excitement at the thought of seeing Nicola again. Nicola puts her phone down, her heart still racing, but there’s a small smile on her lips. They both know that the road ahead won’t be easy, but for the first time in a long while, they feel like they’re on the right path.

The call ends, but the connection between them lingers, a fragile thread that has the potential to grow stronger if they nurture it. They both know this isn’t the end of their story, just the beginning of a new chapter.

#lukola #lukolaland

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howlingday · 4 months

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He keeps getting good another chaptrr

1ST / 2ND / 3RD / 4TH / PREV

"Honestly, can't you do anything right?!"

"I'm trying, okay?" Ruby whimpered after yet another of Weiss' 'honest criticisms' as she called them. Really, they were just Weiss yelling for about a half an hour. And it ended the same way, too.

"Well stop trying and start doing!" Weiss then stomped away, leaving Ruby alone in the dorm, yet again.

This wasn't what Ruby thought Beacon was going to be like at all. She thought she would be going on adventures, making friends, and having fun while learning how to become a huntress. But all she was learning right now was how out of her depth she truly was.

If only Yang was here, but it seems she had something better to do with Blake today. Just like yesterday. And the day before. And the day before that.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. Ruby opened it to find Jaune standing there with sad eyes. "Is... everything okay, Ruby?"

"Yeah, just... me and Weiss are still trying to figure things out." Ruby said, clearly lying to cover for her partner.

"Oh, okay." Jaune said. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

"Not really." Ruby replied.

"Do you wanna... hang out with my team until your team gets back?"

"Yeah." Ruby perked up, making Jaune's tail wag. "Yeah, I'd like that."

--------------------------------------------------

"Oh, hello, Pyrrha~!" Weiss called sweetly, walking up to the more famous student. "How are you this afternoon?"

"I'm fine, Weiss." Pyrrha replied. "I'm just out grabbing medicine for Jaune while he's studying."

"At least your partner studies." Weiss said with a grumble. "My supposed 'leader' would prefer to play video games instead of putting in the effort to learn."

"I... see..."

"Excuse me, I didn't mean to vent." Weiss apologized. "But she can just be... so... frustrating!"

"Well, have you considered how she might be feeling?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, she's certainly younger than us, so maybe she's just not sure what direction she should go. You remember being her age, don't you?"

"I do, but she never had it as difficult as I did!" Weiss huffed. "She never had impossible expectations to live up to like I did."

"Really? What her home life like before coming to Becaon?"

"She probably goofed off at her old school, too."

"Probably?" Pyrrha quirked her brow. "Do you know what school she went to?"

"Well... No." Weiss admitted.

"Do you know why she built her weapon the way she did? Or who taught her before she applied to her old school." Weiss was quiet. "Weiss... Aside from her name, what do you know about Ruby?"

Weiss had no answer. She never considered Ruby to really be her partner. Until now, she saw Ruby as just some kid who lucked her way into being her partner, as if it were some cruel twist of fate as punishment for some crime she didn't commit. This was the first time she considered that maybe, just maybe, Ruby was just as unhappy with Weiss as her partner as she was with her.

"I... should probably ask her." Weiss then said.

"I think that would be a good idea."

--------------------------------------------------

"Hello, again~!" Pyrrha chimed as she opened the door to her dorm. "Oh, hello, Ruby."

"Hi, Pyrrha~!" Ruby smiled, sitting on the floor across from Jaune, books out and open between them. "Jaune and I are just studying."

"Oh, really?" Pyrrha stepped aside to reveal the icy glare of Ruby's partner standing behind her.

"Weiss?!"

"Ruby," Weiss took a deep breath before speaking further, "would you like to study with me?"

"Um..." Ruby scratched her head. "I'm kinda already studying with Jaune."

"Oh..." Weiss wanted to say more, but she thought better than to start anything in someone else's dorm. And what Pyrrha said. "Then perhaps I could... study with you, too."

At this, Ruby looked to Jaune, who smiled, and she gave a smile in return. "Yeah, we can do that, too!"

#rwby #rwby au #maiden blake #maiden blake au #fall maiden blake #fall maiden blake au #weiss schnee #ruby rose #jaune arc #pyrrha nikos

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amberlynnmurdock · 1 year

Text

Blind Faith

Chapter 8: Forgiveness

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Summary: "So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets," Matthew 7:12.

Warnings: making out, angst, Matt's Catholic guilt and lack of accountability lol

Tags: @starry-night-20 @sumsytee @queerqueenlynn @mattmurdocksstarlight @marvelcinematiquniverse

Also, Ao3 link for anyone interested <3

Hell’s Kitchen 11 PM

It wasn’t right to keep coming to you at night, as Mike, when as your boss, everything had fallen apart.

Matt fought with himself mentally ever since that night he last was with you—kissing your knee and giving you the space you needed. I shouldn’t be here anyway, he had told himself. Then why did he find himself crouched on his roof again, sensing with his hearing the path to your apartment? Why was he pacing back and forth on his roof, a tug of war between right and wrong, to make a decision?

The whole thing was screwed up, he thought. He was pretending to be two different people with you: it wasn’t fair. As Matt Murdock, he had yelled at you and hurt your feelings. Of course, he wasn’t happy with himself. He let his feelings for you, as Mike, get the best of him. How was he supposed to react to hearing you’d put yourself in danger?

God, the thought of you in that apartment complex, by yourself, with no weapon but that cheap can of mace you had on you the night he first met you. Something else echoed in Matt’s mind, that one night you’d taunted him with the willingness of throwing yourself in danger. “I’d walk into the depths of this city alone and in nothing but a sundress and wait for you to come to find me.” Matt shook his head at the memory, feeling his blood boil at the thought of you in danger, and him being absent.

He was mad at the situation, mad at how he reacted, mad at himself. It felt really, really wrong, to ignore you in the office but still keep seeing you at night.

But if he stopped seeing you, even until things got better at the office, it might be suspicious. Especially since the two of you had fallen into a routine over the last few weeks. He wanted to apologize, to hold you and tell you the only reason he got upset was because the thought of you getting hurt made him nauseated, sick…but he can’t. Not as Mike. Not as your savior. He could only apologize to you as Matt, something he knew he had to do sooner than later.

Matt did find himself on your roof, soon enough.

He waited for a few moments. You were in your room, wearing a soft hoodie and shorts. Your friends were just on their way out, but not before making sure you wanted to stay in.

“Are you sure?” One of them whined. Matt listened closely to your breathing.

“Yeah, I’ve got to study. Seriously,” You gently argued. You were half lying, Matt could tell. The corner of his mouth twitched upwards.

“All right well, leave the kitchen light on for when we come back,” another one of them said.

“Will do. Be safe,” you told your friends.

Matt waited and tightened the mask on his face. He listened as your friends made their way down the elevator, onto the streets. Then, he heard you shuffle back inside your room. You slipped on your shoes and headed for the rooftop access.

Matt waited for you by the door, head down. When he was immediately hit with your overwhelming sweet scent, he knew there was no turning back now.

“Studying, huh?” Matt teased.

He heard you sigh, not lightheartedly. Tiredly.

“How can you hear that? I wasn’t lying to them,” you argued. “Not entirely.”

You stood in front of him, arms crossed. Matt gently uncrossed your arms, pulled you in, and held you tightly. He buried his face in the crook of your neck. Breathing in your sweet scent reminded him of the day he yelled at you. Well, it was always on his mind, but this transported him back to that moment. Not only was the sound of your heart banging in your chest overtaking his hearing, but it was everything else in how you reacted that became obvious to his senses: your nervous sweat, your voice quivering. The more he thought of it, the more guilty he felt. The more it became obvious he had to apologize and ask for your forgiveness. He’d get on his knees right now if he could.

Why was he here? What was he doing to you?

“What is it?” He suddenly heard you ask him against his chest. You stayed there for a moment until you pulled back, arms still around him.

“Something’s bothering you,” Matt spoke softly. It’s bothering me, too. But maybe if I can talk to you like this, as Mike, I can understand.

“Yeah…” you trailed off. “I don’t know. Do you wanna hear about it?”

“Tell me.”

You sighed, again, and ran a hand through your hair.

“Well, I’m not sure you’ll be too happy either,” you began. “The other night, I was out with my friends. I wasn’t really in the mood, but I haven’t gone out in a while. It was at a Cathedral turned bar. You’d hate it—sacrilegious and whatnot. Anyway, I left to get fresh air and happened to be on the street of one of our client’s houses. I thought I’d be helping, taking pictures for her of her terrible, criminal-run apartment. But my one boss, Matt, got so mad at me,” you explained, defeated. “I’ve never been talked to like that by anyone.”

Matt tried not to react when you said his real name.

“Did he say why he was upset?”

“I put myself in danger, he said. Sure, that might be true, but I did it because I wanted to help.”

“His anger must have come from a place of wanting you to be safe,” Matt echoed his thoughts from earlier. “Maybe the very thought of you in danger is too much to bear.”

“Well, that’s on me,” you argued, “if I want to do something risky.”

“Your risks can affect others too, you know,” Matt replied.

“It’s not like I mean anything to him—I’m just his summer legal assistant.”

Oh, sweetheart. You are much more to me than that.

“You don’t know that,” Matt whispered.

“You wouldn’t have done the same thing I did?” You questioned.

“I would’ve,” Matt answered truthfully, “but it’s different. You’re a young woman, who barely has experience defending herself.”

“Well, we all start somewhere, don’t we?”

Matt ignored you. “I’m happy you are safe. You should let people know your whereabouts next time.”

“I have the phone you gave me,” you argued. “I would’ve called you if anything had gone wrong.”

“I—“ Matt struggled with his words, “I know. Still. Please,” Matt begged, reaching his fingertips to your jaw, “I need you to be safe.”

You cursed under your breath, you were tired of hearing the same sentiments from everyone.

“There’s something else, isn’t there?” Matt asked.

“I guess I just hope he can forgive me,” you confessed. “I think that’s what’s bothering me. The guilt. I thought… he could be a mentor or something for me. But I feel like it’s ruined now.”

“If his anger came from a place of wanting you to be safe, I am sure he feels guilty for the way he handled it,” Matt said in a strained voice. “He will forgive you.”

“I hope you’re right.”

Matt found your lips, pressing a light kiss on you. You slowly pulled back, feeling his lips detach from yours.

“I am,” he whispered.

Truthfully, it wasn’t about Matt forgiving you—it was more if you would be willing to forgive him.

⣿⣿⣿⣿

You woke up slowly, then all at once. You had that strange feeling you got when your dream slowly fizzled into reality—it took you a moment to realize the startling beeping came from your phone alarm. 6:30 AM. Well, you didn’t want to admit it, but you knew there was no avoiding going in early for work this morning. And that meant possibly sharing the office space with Matt.

It’s been a couple of days since he scolded you for taking pictures at Ms. Cruz’s apartment. You tried avoiding him at the office during this time, walking quickly past him when you had to, dropping his files off on his desk before he arrived, or shortly after he left…Karen told you she talked to him and said he would be apologizing, but that hasn’t come yet. You wondered if it ever would. Not that you really needed it; you just wanted things to go back to how they were.

On your way to work, you took your time walking up the blocks of Hell’s Kitchen—you passed a bodega and went inside to grab some coffee for the office and some snacks as well: mini donuts and pastries. The old man at the counter smiled graciously at you as you dropped the change into his tip bucket. Small things like this made you feel better about heading into work.

As predicted, you were the first person to arrive at 7:30 AM. You locked the door as you usually did and began to unpack what you bought from the bodega. You placed the box of donuts and pastries in the middle of the kitchen counter and began to refill the coffee machine. Walking to your desk, you booted up your laptop as you waited for the coffee to brew.

Then came a knock.

You looked up with feline reflexes and saw Matt’s silhouette in the window. His head was low as he waited for you to open up for him. After a deep breath, you walked over to let him inside.

“Good morning,” you greeted in a weaker voice than you anticipated.

Matt pressed his lips together, in an attempt to grin. “Morning.”

You shut the door, not locking it.

You stood by for a moment, your hand on your opposite elbow, Matt’s back to you. You watched as he undid his jacket and hung it on the coat rack. He pulled his cane apart and felt for his jacket pocket, slipping it inside. He paused for a moment.

“How are you?” He asked turning his head. You could see his eyes peek from behind his dark red glasses. You moved your eyes to the floor.

“Good,” you lied, “how are you?”

“I’m all right,” he answered. “You got more coffee?”

“Yeah,” you nodded. “It should be done in a bit.”

“Okay,” Matt breathed. He placed a hand on the door frame of his office and kept his other at his waist. Suddenly, everything in the office felt tense, like you were standing in the middle of an invisible fog. You didn’t need to see it to feel it. And frankly, Matt probably didn’t either. His head was low like he was thinking of what to say.

“When it’s done,” he began, “would you come into my office? So I can talk to you?”

“Yeah,” you replied as lightly as you could. Hopeful. “That's fine.”

You wanted the coffee machine to hurry up from that point on. You poured two cups of coffee—black—and entered Matt’s office, shutting the door behind you. You placed a cup in front of him, to his surprise.

“It’s black,” you told him with a small smile. He smiled in return, moving it to the side.

“Thank you.”

Your cup burned in your hands, so you placed it on his desk as well.

Matt said your name, ever so softly. You’ve never heard his voice like this. He’s spoken to you kindly before—but not softly.

“I’m sorry for how I reacted earlier this week. I know it was unprofessional. And I know it hurt you, for me to lose my temper like that,” Matt began. He shifted behind his desk and fiddled with his tie like it was too tight around his neck.

“I want you to know that it came from a place of wanting to keep you safe. This firm has seen the worst of Wilson Fisk. I know Karen told you about Mrs. Cardenas. And while Fisk may not have his power anymore, there’s still evil in every corner of this city. I was more upset about me not knowing you were there. And I couldn’t bare to think of what could’ve happened if anything went wrong, and I wasn’t—none of us knew,” Matt pleaded, fingers interlocked. He sighed, at the mention of what could’ve gone wrong, like the thought of it actually pained him. You felt guilty, to an extent. He was right in some ways.

“I understand, Matt,” you spoke softly, “I know I should’ve called someone. Like I said, I wasn’t planning on doing it. It was a spur-of-the-moment thing. But now I know better, to consult with you or Karen or Foggy.”

“Honestly, I… can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same. But, please, next time, let us know. That’s all. I really… really can’t fathom if… if…”

“I know,” you finished his thought for him. “I get it. Thank you for talking to me about it, Matt. I really appreciate it.”

“And… I hope you can forgive me, for how I reacted. It wasn’t right. I know that,” Matt shook his head, sort of defeated.

“Of course, I do—as long as you forgive me for going behind everyone’s back.”

Matt held out his hand in response. You hesitated and then shook it. His hand felt surprisingly soft but strong. It was cold. He slowly retreated his hand. He smiled warmly and slid the coffee cup back in front of him. Then, a worried expression fell on his face again.

“Your arm,” he mentioned, “I remember Karen said it was bruised. Is it okay now?”

You’d almost forgotten about your tattoo-like bruise. It was beginning to fade, changing from blue and purple to green and yellow. It didn’t hurt anymore.

“Oh,” you said, “yeah, it’s getting better. It doesn’t hurt.”

“Good,” Matt nodded.

You sat up from the chair and began to walk out, but Matt’s voice stopped you again.

“I’m sorry,” Matt said again, “just so you know that I really regret speaking to you that way.”

You exhaled, truly feeling like a weight had been lifted off your chest. “It’s really okay, Matt. I’m just glad we can move forward.”

He smiled and turned his attention to his Orbit reader.

The rest of the morning went by better than you could imagine. It didn’t have to be said that Matt apologized—it was a clear indication that things were fine when Foggy and Karen noticed you going back and forth to Matt’s office, with questions about his cases and offering help on any writing.

Things became even more solidified that all was well when Matt left a gift on your desk for you at the end of the day: a brand new leather-bound legal notepad. The color red.

⣿⣿⣿⣿ 11:30 PM

Now that you felt everything in your professional life was fine again, you easily fell into the warmth and excitement of seeing Mike at night. For a little, it was hard to push those things aside but walking up the steps to the rooftop access, you felt as light as a feather.

There he was, your creature of the night, stalking the roof with his hands behind his back, dressed all in black. His face was half covered, a comfort you’ve grown used to, a feeling you knew would be hard to detach from, if you ever had to. He smiled when you entered into his graces. You grabbed him by his jaw and kissed him, hard.

“You seem in a better mood,” Mike smiled against your kiss. You ignored him and kissed him more.

“I am,” you affirmed, running your hands along the length of his torso. “How about you, Catholic guilt?”

Mike laughed, and you felt the vibrations in his chest. He snaked his arms around your waist and held you against him. You moved your head so your neck was exposed. Mike ran the tip of his nose along the side of your neck, peppering kisses along the way. He stopped when he reached your ear, gently tugging it with his teeth.

“I can never be in a bad mood when I’m with you,” he murmured in your ear. You shivered against him.

“You sure you don’t say this to all the girls you’ve saved before?” You smirked. “Our meetings have started much later lately.”

Mike growled in your ear as he held you even tighter, the joke of him being with anyone else other than you triggering him. “You’re my first stop, my last, and my only,” he said in a husky tone. He kissed your neck and pulled your hair to guide your lips to his. He kissed you and slid his tongue into your mouth. You graciously accepted. He was kissing you like he’s never kissed you before. He ran his fingers through your hair and rested his hands on the small of your back.

“Mike,” you pulled back, breathlessly, “you know what I was thinking recently? And by recently, I mean, just moments before this?”

“What, sweetheart?”

“Sometimes, well, frequently, I really worry about you. I know you’ve been doing this a while, but now I feel like I have a hand in this fight. I…I’m attached to you. I feel safe with you. I worry about you.”

Mike’s jaw clenched as you spoke. Did you upset him, in some way? By being honest?

“I know you say you worry about me and want me to be safe, but that goes both ways now. You know what I mean?” You continued, reaching up to run your finger over his bottom lip. Mike seemed to melt at the touch, unclenching his jaw.

“Yeah,” he answered softly, “I know.”

“I just thought you should know that now.”

“Forgive me,” he answered almost instantly, taking your hand from his face and holding it. “For making you feel that way.”

You looked at him confused. He kissed your knuckles.

“There’s nothing to forgive,” you said breathlessly.

Oh, but only if you knew what there was.

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minkkumaz · 1 year

Text

I'M TRYING TO GET OVER THIS

months passed by since riwoo walked out with no explanation. as he laid in your memories, you finally were starting to be happy again. but he made things a lot more difficult when he showed up unannounced.

PAIRING lee riwoo x fem!reader WC 1.3k TAGS angst. minor cussing. major miscommunication. OMI NOTE this makes me wanna die goodnight, i cried four times writing this. inspired by memories, conan gray.

there was a part of you that died that day. the day riwoo walked out with no explanation. maybe you’d feel a little more sane if he told you everything, but he didn’t. the closure you longed for disappeared as he became unreachable. but you loved him. you loved him more than words could explain. the feeling of homesickness bubbled up in your stomach at the unlivelyness of your house.

countertops that were once littered with empty diet coke cans and receipts from your dates remained clear. waking up next to the ghost of a figure that was once there. all of it was gone, your life, your meaning.

it didn’t exactly register in your brain how distant he has been until he was gone from you. how his phone would be more out of reach, how his hands didn’t rub circles into yours late into the night. there were many things you picked out once you became aware. and you still didn’t know why. communication was never something the two of you were good at. simple apologies became much more meaningful. riwoo was introverted at heart, his calm demeanor almost could be compared to being emotionless. you never saw that in him, he let his guard down around you. so when days, weeks, even months went by without a word, you thought that maybe you were getting a taste of what it was like to be a stranger to him. you wanted to keep him in your memories, and look back at the photos of the two of you together. happy that the moment existed, and not that it ended. somewhere in between the lines, when you were able to smile instead of cry, he had to come back into your life again. rain pattered against the glass windows of your home. it was late, and you were as tired as the clouds. wanting to let go of everything and just sleep. comfort in yourself was something you became used to over time. when your doorbell rang, you felt confused. the darkness of the night meant no visitors for awhile, so you hesitantly let the creaky floorboards signal you coming to let whatever was outside in. you wish you didn’t open that door. completely soaked, riwoo stood at your porch. his clothes stuck to his skin and his hair made him look like a wet dog. the depth of his eyes, something you found yourself zoning out in, stared at you with regret. “hi, y/n. can we talk?” he muttered, blinking back the rain water.

“um, yeah yeah. come in riwoo.” you open the door wider to signal him inside, immediately drenching wherever he stepped.

you rushed to get him his spare clothes that you boxed up some time ago, as well as a towel. it didn’t take long for him to situate himself, so once you were properly met face to face with him, your vision went hazy. the feeling of hurt and betrayal immediately became familiar. it was always there, you just tried your best to ignore it. “what are you doing here, riwoo?” you ask him plainly, in an attempt to hide behind your discomfort. “i shouldn’t have walked out on you that day, but i need to explain to you why it happened.” he confessed. “i don’t need closure anymore, it’s been months riwoo.” your face begins to burn and you’re unable to maintain eye contact.

“but i need closure. what i did was so fucking stupid and i don’t think i’d be able to bear it if you didn’t even know why.” silence overtook you. the whole situation still didn’t sit right with you, so words became unattainable. “a lot of me was overwhelmed by all of this. by us.” he started, “when we first started dating, i didn’t have any real responsibilities. but then so much stuff happened since then and i thought i needed a break.” “then why didn’t you say anything to me?” “you know i was never good at communication, y/n. you can’t blame me for taking some time away.” he furrowed his eyebrows at your response. “three months riwoo. three months you left me without saying anything and you expect me not to be upset? to not blame you for all this shit that has happened?” you cry out, barely acknowledging the tears that began falling down your cheeks. “i know i–” “please don’t make it harder than it already is, i’m trying to get over this.” you cut him off, biting your bottom lip to hold back any further sobs.

“i don’t want you to get over me, y/n. is that selfish?” he says in almost a whisper. “you already know what i’m going to say to that.”

“then don’t say anything, please. this time apart has only made me miss you more. it made me realize how much i need you in my life.” his hand grabs yours, the gentle touch you used to love felt invalidating on your skin. “why won’t you let me go? why do you have to show up when i was finally starting to be happy again?” you sniffle, letting his free hand wipe away your tears. “because we still have so much ahead of us if you let me back in, if not as a lover, as friend.” “there’s no reason in convincing me that we could ever exist again, riwoo. not even as a friend. we both know we’ll prevent eachother from falling in love with anyone but one another.”

“and why can’t we just let that happen?”

“because i want to move on. i think it’s better for the both of us.” you affirmed, removing his hands off of you. “i think you need to leave now, riwoo.” a breath escaped your mouth that you didn’t know you were holding in as you walked away from him. there wasn’t any movement behind you for a moment. you almost wanted to turn back and tell him not to move. but you couldn’t. riwoo stood up from your couch and walked to the door, in which now had a box of some of his leftover things. but before he picked it up, he turned around to face you for the last time. the sadness on both of your faces probably should’ve told you guys that maybe you should try again. “i’m sorry things ended up this way, my love.” he held his head low, before you wrapped yourself around his torso. “don’t call me that, this is hard enough.” your words come out muffled into his chest. “can we stay like this for a little, then? for the last time.” he asked quietly, as you hum in return. he returned your hug, a sob threatening to escape from his throat at the thought of having to eventually let you go. you tilted your head up too see him. he looked weary, eye bags hardly peeking underneath his waterline. yet they were visible enough to make you frown. this was all his fault, but you felt bad. and though part of your heart died that day, it still beat for him.

“will you let me kiss you, y/n?” he looks down at you, helpless.

you barely nod before warmth spreads across your lips. it was intimate, his own chasing after yours. something that used to be rewarded to you after a long day. something that used to comfort you when life wasn’t going good. something that gave you butterflies. something that you would never feel ever again.

it ended as soon as it began, and he finally pulled away from you to grab the abandoned box in the floor. when he started to leave everything became blurry. “i’ll always love you, y/n.” with that, he became a distant memory.

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studentinpursuitofclouds · 1 year

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Helloooo 👋🏽 perhaps sdv and sde bachelors and farmer on a (deadly) jungle adventure? 🍃 🐍🦜

Hell yeah! Sorry for a long reply, was busy with other things.

It can be assumed that I had a lot of fun when I wrote the answer to this headcanon, because fuck me, this HC is huge 😅 I made different situations and maybe they moved away from the main question, apologize for that... I'm just get so hyped about request.

Anyway, thanks for your ask, dear anon!

✨SDV bachelors:✨

Elliott:

Actually, it was all Elliott's idea, as the long-haired writer wanted to collect material for his future novel. "And the best way to write about any adventures is to be on those adventures yourself! You will protect us, my love, I completely trust you!" The Farmer just sighed and left to gather supplies for the trip to Ginger Island.

Elliott is really lucky that his love also turned out to be his bodyguard and guide. While he enthusiastically looked at the wild limurs on the branches in the distance, the Farmer didn't take their eyes off him.

But as soon as they were distracted for a minute, Elliott, not noticing anyone around, wandered further into the depths of the jungle.

He carried on his monologue, still believing that the Farmer was nearby and listening to everything the writer told him. Until Elliott felt something touch his left shoulder.

"O ho ho, my love, that tickles! I certainly don't mind the attention, and if you want some rest, we caaaAAAAAAAAAA-!"

If there was any fauna nearby, then it instantly scattered away from Elliott's heart-rending scream when he saw a huge spider on his shoulder.

So he ran and screamed, until he collided head-on with... No, not with the Farmer, but with a pirate. The pirate, a little clumsily, shouted somewhere to the side: "Ahoy mate, we found yar lover"

Elliott's happiness knew no bounds when their Farmer emerged from the ferns. It turns out that Elliott wandered around Ginger Island for more than hour, and the Farmer decided to ask for help from fellow pirates to help with the search.

"Your friends are pirates? My love, why didn't you tell me sooner!"

Now they will both sit in a cozy cave until the evening, while the Farmer again beats the pirates in darts, while Elliott, already tipsy, listens to stories for a future book. You can even call it almost an autobiography!

(No spiders were harmed in this story)

Sebastian:

Sebby reread at home a magazine that he bought at the last amphibian exhibition, not forgetting to tell the Farmer cool facts about one or another type of frog.

The Farmer listened with interest to their partner until their eyes landed on a familiar sight of an amphibian.

"Oh, I saw these in the jungles of Ginger Island. They only come out when it rains, beautiful creatures, although very shy." "Wait, really?" "Yeah"

Sebastian just had a small collection of photos of frogs and newts, and asked his spouse if they could go there on a rainy day. The Farmer agreed, but warned Sebby to be around as it could be dangerous there.

Sebastian agreed to take weapons, elixirs, and he also read on the Internet how to behave when meeting with wild animals (he does not want to disturb wildlife much).

Luckily for them, there were a dozen of these frogs there. And the rain and dew on the amphibians adorned the picture (thanks that his phone and camera are waterproof).

Only Sebastian accidentally wandered deep into the jungle, and stumbled upon a lone tiger slime. Alas, he didn't have enough strength to defeat this monster, so he did what the Farmer told him in such cases - run.

Mr. Emo man did just that and, fortunately for him, found his spouse again. The Farmer kissed Sebby and promised that they would quickly deal with the slime. In the meantime, in order not to get wet in the rain, they told him to go to their house on the shore.

Only Sebastian wanted to go into the house, as he noticed a small entrance to the cave in the wall on the right. Why hadn't he seen this before? The cave was small, and its only inhabitant was... a huge anthropomorphic toad, sitting in a lotus position and saying that "long before, melons were much sweeter and bombo-big."

.....

Sebastian didn't seem to touch those poisonous frogs and photographed from a distance. Why he hallucinated then?

Until the Farmer went into the cave later, not finding Sebastian at home, and explained that it was kind of like... neighbor.

"Cool" is all that surprised Sebastian said, taking a picture of a huge toad.

Shane:

Fucking finally. A well deserved vacation with his partner.

Shane was so happy about the news about the vacation that he did not hear from the Farmer where exactly they were going and immediately agreed to the offer. It doesn't matter to him where they will rest, even in hell - the main thing is his partner and a pleasant pastime.

Shane realized only when they were in the jungle of Ginger Island, looking for "golden walnuts".

"Honey, but you agreed to travel with me for a little while and take a break from farm work." Shane would have liked to object, but he can't... Fuck.

Well, at least the Farmer gave him a good sword and don't stray far from Shane.

Although chicken man still managed to get lost several times in three palm trees. Like how??!?

The jungle is hot, but quite beautiful, and these flowers are so pret-

"Augh! Goddamn snakes!" "Shane, it's a liana, there are no snakes on Ginger island" "How the hell should I know about this?!"

He want to relax, and he was even more tired. Bluh...

While the Farmer wiped out the slimes, Shane struggled with the local dense vegetation. "Fucking ferns!"

Although in the evening, after a successful hunt for golden acorns ("Walnuts, Shane" "Same thing, doesn't fkng matter..."), they went to their house on the coast (when did his partner manage to buy real estate here??)

Delicious tropical dishes, pina colada (just a little sip), cool sea breeze and sunset - now this is a real vacation!

After they both returned, Shane offered to take another rest in the same way. Although the search for nuts was tiring and dangerous, it was fun.

Harvey:

"Honey, are you sure this is a good idea? There can be many diseases in the tropics, not to mention dangerous animals, mosquitoes, unknown plants to which we may be allergic, and..."

The Farmer was assured that they had already been in the depths of Ginger Island, and nothing serious had happened. They still insist that Harvey go with them "to show something interesting, but it's a surprise ;)" The poor doctor doesn't know how to react to this "surprise", but nevertheless agreed to the request of the Farmer.

A huge backpack stuffed with medicines, food supplies, sunscreen and mosquito spray - Harvey seemed to be preparing for a long journey. He also dressed like a spitting image of Indiana Jones - I mean wow, like a treasure hunter, honestly!

Surprisingly, Harvey reacts very calmly to danger in the jungle. It would seem that he would faint at the sight of an aggressive limur or poisonous insects, but he skillfully avoids danger and does not disturb the animals.

"Darling, we could travel the world like this in retirement" "As long as we have a full first aid kit and a supply of fresh water, I don't even mind. Just please, let's not go rock climbing, you know that I am afraid of heights..."

The Farmer and Harvey finally reached what the Farmer called a "surprise". The entrance to the cave - and they were inside a small space with five huge crystals. When Harvey wanted to ask what it was, Farmer suggested just "sit down and enjoy."

After half a minute, the eyes on the wall stone sculpture lit up, and the cave filled with a ringing melody emanating from bright colored crystals. The melody was... so beautiful. It was the first time Harvey had heard the tune, and at the same time, he could have sworn it sounded like the lullaby her mother used to sing to him when he was a child. Calming, beautiful, and with the sounds of nature outside, it created such a magical atmosphere.

Harvey saw the Farmer smiling at him. The doctor gave Farmer the same sincere smile, took their hand, and in silence they continued to listen to the wonderful melody.

Sam:

It was supposed to be a normal day at the resort, with no misadventures for the famous Pelican Town A.S.S. trinity and Farmer. And everything was relatively calm until, while playing frisbee, Sam accidentally threw the frisbee somewhere in the direction of tall palm trees and dense vegetation. Sam felt sorry for the new frisbee, and he didn’t want to litter anywhere, so he quickly ran towards the jungle in search of the item.

Sam was already far away, and didn't hear the calls of his partner Farmer, completely immersed in the search for the Frisbee. The young guitarist only experienced reality when he tripped over a rock and tumbled down the hill into a small pit.

Fortunately, Sam only escaped with scratches, but realized that he could not get out of the ill-fated pit. Therefore, he had no choice but to call for help from his spouse and friends.

"Sammy, are you okay?" "Yep baby, I'm fine" Sam felt a little guilty when he heard Farmer's worried voice. And why the hell did he go into the jungle for that stupid frisbee!

"The walls are slippery, I can't climb up on my own. Babe, can you throw off some rope?" The Farmer pondered Sam's words for half a minute until they noticed a parrot sitting next to them. "I have a better idea." With that, the Farmer smiled and took out some golden walnuts from their pocket, which they promptly gave to the parrot.

The feathered friend accepted the treat, and at the same moment flew into the air, calling its brethren to the pit. The musician did not even have time to be surprised when he felt that he was enveloped in a loud and feathery dark cloud - and at the same instant he was on the surface next to his partner.

Sam sat there in mute shock, covered in scratches and dirt and feathers, as the Farmer examined him for any injuries.

"Cupcake, are you like a parrots whisperer?" "Something like that ;)" "Wow... If I tell Sebby and Abby about what happened, they won't believe it..."

At the same moment, the frisbee fell next to him, and the parrot that dropped a plastic object nearby shouted something merrily in bird language. The Farmer nodded their head in gratitude, and all the parrots flew off somewhere into the sky, beyond the dense jungle.

Alex:

Alex has long wanted to start reading books and catch up in his youth. One of these books, which he found on the bookshelf (now his, too) of the farm, had drawings of exotic animals on it and in large capital letters: "Extreme Survival Primer."

He knew that the Farmer often went on trips, doing hunting monsters and protecting people when they weren't farming, so books like this could help a little to navigate in an unfamiliar environment. However, he also wanted to be in such a situation so that he knew what to be prepared for.

"Honey, I'm going to have an unusual request" "Yes, dear? What is it?"

The Farmer listened to Alex with all seriousness, and agreed to travel together to Ginger Island to be his guide for a day. They are very responsible for the safety of the athlete, although Alex himself grumbles a little and says that "he is not so helpless."

But once in the thick of the jungle, Alex was nevertheless grateful to the Farmer for the safety rules and the supply of healing elixirs: the athlete skillfully bypassed suspicious spiders and frogs, and when meeting with the slime, he was able to give a worthy rebuff with the Farmer.

"Hell yeah, that's my boy! Maybe Marlon will also accept you in the Adventurer's Guild as well!" Alex blushed at such praise, but tried not to show his partner how flattered he was. It didn't work out, the Farmer knows him too well.

It was a fun time and a good experience for him. Only now Alex worries about the Farmer even more when he sees at least one scratch on the face of his loved one. "It needs to be treated, because dirt can get into wound, and then infection, I read that such diseases are very common in the tropics, and also..."

Not that the Farmer would be against the protective and caring Alex, quite the contrary. But the athlete is now like a mother hen. The Farmer still loves him though :D

✨SVE bachelors:✨

Victor:

Victor and his mother have traveled to various islands throughout the Ferngill Republic, so he was delighted at the offer of the Farmer to relax together in his own house on the beach of Ginger Island. It will be so romantic! "Oh, I need to get a bottle of red wine, and ingredients for spaghetti. Is there somewhere to cook it? Great! I'll make dinner for two for us! and I also need to take a couple of books and-" "Victor, my soul, we're going there for a couple of days"

The first day was very romantic and wonderful. Just like in those advertisements for tourist packages, but here everything was real and beautiful: the sea, a colorful sunset, dinner for two, clinking glasses of wine, a beloved partner... What can I say, Victor is still a hopeless romantic.

The next day, early in the morning, when Victor woke up before the Farmer, he decided not to wake them and take a walk on the sandy shore.

But Victor's curiosity and the instinct of self-preservation, a little blunted after a sleep, led him further to the west of the island. He became interested in what kind of small hut the shore stands in general, and also to examine the wreckage of the ship.

But at the last moment, the poor fellow noticed how a tiger slime was quickly approaching him, with squelching sounds. The monster took him by surprise and Victor was forced to climb the stairs, deep into the jungle, only to realize that he had landed on a whole nest of tiger slimes!

Before he could do anything, a strange circle of symbols formed around him, and the slimes immediately crawled away. "It's pretty dangerous to wander around Ginger Island alone and unarmed. Fortunately, I was there at the right time." Victor only opened his mouth and made a lowing sound when he saw a pink-haired man in front of him. "You must be Victor, right? Farmer's partner? They talked a lot about you on our joint expeditions."

Expeditions, a sword, a blue cloak... Click!

"Are you... an adventurer? And not just an adventurer, but a member of The First Slash clan?!" Victor forgot that recently he was in mortal danger, because he recognized this man! Second in command of the First Slash clan!

He had already managed to ask a thousand questions to the surprised Lance about the life of adventurers and about the clan itself, until the Farmers ran up to them, ready to destroy everything that even dares to harm Victor. What a surprise it was when they discovered their unharmed spouse and fellow adventurer.

Well, at least it ended well. And Victor is generally delighted with such adventures. Adventurer from the First Slash clan! "Victor, are you just squeak?"

Magnus:

Magnus recently spoke with The First Slash clan's mage, and they brought up the subject of testing magical barriers against alien magic on part of Ginger Island, as after the Farmer's activities and the help of parrots, the coast has become a resort now, regularly visited by the inhabitants of Pelican Town. The safety of people is the responsibility of wizards and witches, so someone has to take care of this.

The members of The First Slash, for some important reason, cannot now go on patrol and set up a barrier, so the First Slash mage asked for the help of Rasmodius, as an experienced wizard, and the Farmer, as a talented and gifted adventurer. To which both Magnus and the Farmer agreed to help their colleagues.

Since the Farmer had already combed the whole Ginger Island and learned the area, Magnus relied on them as a guide. They need to go to different parts of the island so that the wizard casts a spell and fixes the barrier.

The first part was right in the heart of the jungle, and Magnus cursed constantly as exotic plants clung to his cloak, already soiled in the local clay and mud. Wild animals and insects did not cause him any panic: a snap of his fingers - and all the dangerous fauna galloped away. This is much better and humane than trying to harm nature.

Then they went west, closer to the old ruins of the sunken ship. The tiger slimes were already waiting for unfortunate prey, but they themselves became prey for the Farmer's sword and Magnus' spells. Now Magnus is also smeared with slime, what a bad luck.

"Razzy, do you have the concept of 'clean things' spells" "Actually, there are as many as 5, but we haven't finished the expedition yet, so... Are you calling me Razzy again? I swear, you and Camilla... I will stop talking to her, and I will divorce you altogether" "You love me too much :D" "Unfortunately, I am"

Now, the barrier is set, it will hold for several seasons. Magnus finally casts a cleansing spell - and now he and all of his robes are clean. He even used it on his spouse (so they don't waste time swimming in the sea, especially since the water is salty there!)

"I'm surprised how calmly you handled wild snakes. Although they are not poisonous, but still very impressive" "Believe me, my darling, I sometimes met such "snakes" among colleagues in the Ministry of Magic that these reptiles on the island are harmless creatures."

A job well done and a lot of praise from his partner - Magnus' trip to the jungle was a success!

Lance:

Joint patrols on Ginger Island are pretty rare for Lance. Well, actually not like that, he and the Farmer often spend time together, but usually the patrolling on this particular island are done one by one. Love, family - this is important, but no one released from the duties of the adventurer. Thankless job, indeed.

Just on this day, when Lance was ready to sail to Ginger Island, the Farmer was told that they wanted to go with him, collect some ginger and edible ferns. Lance is not against the company, especially since it is his partner.

However, he warned his love to take supplies of elixirs and keep the sword at the ready, because tiger slimes live in some parts of the island.

Although the heat and humidity were unbearable at noon, duties are duties, and two adventurers must fulfill them.

After all, Lance was right when he told them both to be on the lookout - several magma sprites crawled out from a huge cave in the volcano, which immediately attacked Lance and the Farmer. The sounds of steel rang out, the local limurs and monkeys raised a roar, but it all ended as quickly as it began - Lance and the Farmer stood in a fighting pose, and the ashes from magma sprites lay under their feet.

“Jolyne was right, the barrier had weakened. We should warn our mage to take care of it.” Lance slid his sword back into its sheath. "Well, my love, we still have time and we can devote ourselves to gathering the ginger roots you spoke about earlier."

Before you started looking for roots, Lance recommended that he cast an invisibility spell on the two of them. "We are unlikely to meet more dangerous monsters in the depths of the jungle, but I would not like to disturb the local fauna too much." The Farmer agreed with him, and they both began gathering.

Naturally, this was accompanied by constant conversations about nature on the island in general, theories about where the dwarves on the volcano came from, and many other topics.

Both of them were in no hurry: after all, invisibility allows you not to disturb the animals and do research in peace. The main thing is not to fall into the pit or step on the snake.

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stray-cattt · 1 year

Text

the pain is gone, but all your scars remain

A Nimona (2023) hurt/comfort fanfic, if you'd rather read it on A03, here's the link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/48475993

Summary: Basically, Ambrosius and Ballister are getting ready for bed and things are still a bit awkward and tense between them so they talk about things.

Content/Trigger Warnings: None that I can think of

Ballister carefully disengages his prosthetic arm and sets it on the table across from his and Ambrosius’ bed. Sometimes it’s like it's still there, his arm, he can feel it. The pain comes and goes, sometimes aching, other times more like a quick sharp pain, there, then gone. Ballister stands there deep in thought as his gaze is fixed on his prosthetic as his mind replays it all, without realizing it his breathing becomes shallow.

A knock from the bedroom door interrupts his thoughts and slowly he tears his gaze from the table. The door slowly opens to reveal Ambrosius dressed in his pajamas, fidgeting with his sleeves that are slightly too long, before lifting his gaze to meet Ballisters.

“Everything alright? You haven’t got dressed for bed yet.” Ambrosius asks, concern laced in his eyes. Quietly he shuts the door behind him and inches a bit closer to Ballister, placing a hand on his right shoulder, the action seems to pull him out of his mind.

“Yeah, I was just thinking about things and got a bit distracted,” Ballister lets out a weak laugh only meeting Ambrosius’ eyes for a brief second before his eyes linger on the table again. Ambrosius follows his gaze and lets out a small sigh as guilt begins to plague his being. Before Ambrosius can get a word in, Ballister continues, looking him in the eyes.

“I’ll go get ready for bed now, I’ll be back in a bit.” Ballister gives Ambrosius a small smile before grabbing his PJs off of his side of the bed and heading toward the bedroom door. Ambrosius nearly grabs his hand to stop him but stops himself and lets Ballister walk through the door.

Ambrosius feels a weight crashing onto his chest as Ballister softly closes the door. A shaky breath leaves him as one of his hands grasps the front of his shirt. He sits on the unmade bed as his thoughts begin to race about all that he’d done to his lover, it had only been a month since everything had all happened. Neither of them had really talked in depth about what happened, yes there were the rushed apologies right off the bat, but they hadn’t really expressed to each other how it had all impacted them emotionally. Maybe tonight would be the night they could talk about it, tonight, tomorrow morning, sometime soon, they needed to talk.

Ballister tossed his dirty clothes in the hamper in the corner of the bathroom before taking a look at himself in the mirror. The bags under his eyes were heavy, and even after returning next to his lover's side, and stopping the director he still didn’t feel at rest, he couldn’t. Thoughts of Nimona often plagued his mind, if maybe she would return by whatever magic that had created her. He hadn’t gone back to their ‘evil lair’ yet, it still seemed too painful.

Of course it wasn’t only the thought of Nimona that haunted him, it was also scars left over from what had all happened in those few days, weeks maybe? Everything had happened so fast time seemed to slip his grasp. The scars, mental, emotional, and physical all had yet to heal completely, at points Ballister worried that they never would.

Ballister took his hand and ran it through his hair. He needed a shower but hadn’t found it in him to take one, at least not tonight. Sighing, he dropped his hand from his hair and quickly brushed his teeth before leaving the bathroom.

Ballister didn’t knock before he entered his shared room with Ambrosius. He expected Ambrosius to have already been laying in bed, but the bed had yet to be made and instead, his lover was standing in front of his prosthetic. His fingers lightly traced the wiring and metal with a sense of melancholy. The closing of the door caused Ambrosius to jump a bit, pulling his fingers away from Ballister’s prosthetic. Startled, he turned his head towards the door making eye contact with his lover.

The silence between them was heavy and dense, the unsaid words threatening to choke them as they stared into each other's eyes. Ambrosius was the first one to break the silence as he cleared his throat and took his eyes off of Ballister, now looking at the bed.

“Want to help me make the bed?” Ambrosius suggested, scratching the back of his head. For the most part, they had been behaving as they always had, but sometimes it got awkward and stiff as if the air molecules in the air had stopped moving. Ballister blinked for a second processing Ambrosius’ words before nodding and walking over to their bed. They both fixed the sheets together standing on their respective sides of the bed. With the bed made, Ballister turned on the lamp on the right side of the bed as Ambrosius turned off the main lights of the room.

Neither of them said a word as they lay down in their bed getting situated. Given that they were both in bed now, Ballister turned off the lamp and all that illuminated the room was the lights of the city filtering in through the thin curtains covering the window. They were quiet for a few minutes more before Ambrosius finally spoke up.

“I wanted to say that I’m sorry, I know I’ve already apologized to you before right after it happened and a couple times after but I feel like we haven’t really gotten to talk about it that much with everything that’s been happening since the queen died. I am so genuinely sorry for how I treated you and your friend Nimona,” At the mention of her name Ballister stiffened a bit, he knew that eventually, they’d have to have a real conversation about it, but he didn’t expect it to be this night.

“I treated both of you unfairly, and while I never believed that you had actually killed the queen, I didn’t say anything to stick up for you and in staying silent I sided with those who were hunting you down. While everything turned out okay in the end, at least… for the most part, I shouldn’t have stood by their side. I should’ve questioned what the director was telling me and not seen Nimona out to be what she wasn’t. While I’ve apologized hundreds of times for your arm, I will apologize for it again, even though it’s what we were trained to do, I took a part of you that you can’t get back and have caused you pain and harm. Sometimes all my mind can do is replay my actions toward you at that moment and the moments following. I wish I could change my actions and go back and know what I know now back then, but I know I can’t. I just want you to know how much I love and care about you, Ballister,” Ambrosius confessed, a few stray tears making their way down his face as he reached out to brush away a couple of tears that had fallen from Ballister’s eyes.

“I know Ambrosius, and I love you too, and care about you so much. I really appreciate all that you’ve said, and I want to acknowledge that you were being manipulated while this all happened. You don’t have to carry the weight of it all, let some of it fall onto others. I would’ve probably responded the same way had our positions been switched. In the end, the person you are now is not the person you were back then, and that’s what matters. I’m in love with you, not your mistakes. While I’m glad you were able to acknowledge them, they don’t define you. While they’ve left scars, scars will heal someday, even if they feel like they won’t. I know I feel that way sometimes. Someday the pain will be gone, and all that will remain will be the scars and the stories they hold. I’m not sure if I’m making a lot of sense here, but I want you to know that together we can grow and move past this. You don’t have to feel guilty, you’ve suffered the consequences enough.” Ballister responded gently to Ambrosius, now caressing his face with his left hand.

A weight had been lifted off the both of them, even if just a little bit, things were more manageable. Together they held each other and cried for what seemed to be an eternity but wasn’t quite nearly as long. They lovingly stared at one another, the filtered light highlighting the tear tracks that had run down their faces like rivers.

They talked a bit more after the tears had died down, being honest with each other about what they had been feeling. Talked about things they’d only ever share with each other, and by the time they had reached an end to their conversation, the majority of the city had fallen asleep.

In silence they held each other, Ballister held onto his lover’s waist and laid his head on his chest as Ambrosius traced patterns into his back. Together they lulled themselves to sleep to the sounds of the city of those who stayed awake in ungodly hours. Tomorrow would be a new day for them, things would be different for the better. Plus, maybe even Ballister would stop by his ‘evil lair’ and run into a friend. But who knows, that’s tomorrow, and right now he’s sleeping by his lover's side, content.

#angst #fluff and angst #nimona #nimona netflix #ballister boldheart #ambrosius goldenloin #ballister x ambrosius #much needed conversations #ptsd #mentioned ish #healthy relationships #men crying #mentions of phantom pains #cuddling and snuggling #comfort #hurt/comfort #crying #angst and feels

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