#aeiou thinking

[shouldering-worlds]

y'all wish you had as organized a gallery as me

I've got phan memes and pics for days baby

[shouldering-worlds]

I'm a big fan of the acronym ED-

-Erectile Dysfunction

-Eating Disorder

-Edward

-education

-Early decision

-Department of Education (apparently???)

honestly like i get the poly(nesian) vs poly(amorous) thing, and n(on)b(lack) vs n(on)b(inary), and i’ll change to polyam or ply or enby if asked to avoid confusion, but i also need yall to know that like…its okay for one abbreviation to have multiple meanings. theres only 26 letters and we can reuse some of them, no one is “stealing” anything.

Animal Crossing did not attack Air Conditioners.

[pierregaslays]

genuine question btw is james vowles going through a midlife crisis bc brother why are you acting like you’ve never received pr training in your life

[polypodweek]

With one day left to go we're just short of 30 podfics!

30! That's so many! 🎉🎉

[spacelandz]

HE'S A BITER!!!!

[shouldering-worlds]

Just a little choir boy :D

(source)

[shouldering-worlds]

wearing a belt for Dan <3

[whatinthebuck]

Unspoken truth

Summary: Buck and the reader are best friends who secretly like each other but won’t admit it until one night 

Word count: 1546

 Author's notes: I haven't written since the beginning of this year so it might be a little awkward at the smut part. And my request are open! Lmk on the things I should work on for my future stories

Taglist: @silas-aeiou —------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Buck looked up at all of the windows to all of the different apartments before he took a deep breath and started to walk inside towards yours. He knocked on your apartment door hoping you would answer since it was 2 am. After a minute or so he was about to leave thinking you weren't up before you opened the door. 

“Buck? What are you doing here at 2 am?” 

“Hey, sorry were you asleep?”

“Yeah I was. I just got home like an hour ago but come inside” you say. Opening the door wider for him to walk inside. 

“Okay great” He said as he awkwardly put his hands in his pockets and walks inside/

“Soo I couldn’t sleep” he repeated softley, his voice barely above a whisper. 

“Yeah I would be concerned if you did come here to sleep” you joked 

He laughs and you laugh along with him as things become silent but in a comforting way. The kind that only exists between close friends. 

He leans against the wall in the walkway so you mimic him doing the same but on the opposite wall of him. 

As they stood in the dimly lit hallway, the soft hum of the refrigerator was the only thing breaking the silence. He leaned against the wall, his eyes meeting hers with a mix of nervousness and warmth. 

She felt her heart racing, wondering if he could hear it.  

The moonlight peaking through the curtains in the window at the end of the hall casting a soft glow on both of their faces. She noticed a soft blush on his cheeks and wondered if he had noticed hers. 

They had known each other for years, but lately things started to feel like something changed. 

This moment felt different, charged with unspoken words and hidden feelings. 

He shifted slightly before speaking again. 

“Do you ever think about……….. Us?” he asked, his voice hesitant. 

“What about us?’ 

“I don't know like there's something more. Like we're meant to be more than just friends.” 

The silence was thick between them as her heart raced at his question. She had always had feelings for Buck but never had the courage to tell him directly. You have always tried to deny your feelings to yourself and everyone else around you,  But now under the soft glow of the moonlight, everything seemed different, more intimate. 

After what seemed like hours for buck, you answered “Yes.” your voice barely above a whisper. “I do think about us. More than I should. And it’s not in a way best friends should be thinking about each other.”

His eyes widened slightly as he thought about your words. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. All this time he had been hiding the same feelings but he assumed you thought of him as a friend and nothing more. 

“You…You do?” Buck said softly as a million thoughts raced through his mind.

He pushed away from the wall and slowly walked over to where you were standing, still leaving a little bit of distance just in case he was misreading the conversation. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” You look up towards buck 

“I was scared that you didn’t feel the same way.” Buck said avoiding eye contact. Instead he distracted himself by running his fingers up and down your arm gently, his eyes following the motion of his hands. 

You could sense how nervous he was so you decided to take the lead by grabbing his hand and intertwining your fingers with his. While you do that you bring yourself off the wall and close the distance between you two. Buck’s eyes look into yours before he looks at your lips and back to your eyes. He hesitantly leans down towards you, his hand going to your chin to lift your head up so he has more access to your lips. He paused half way there and his eyes were on you waiting for you to make the next move. You wrap your arms around his neck and bring him down to kiss you. 

First the kiss was gentle, saying the things you and buck haven't said. After you guys pulled away to catch your breath. Buck then leans in again and kisses you more desperately than the first kiss. You know what he wants, and you decide you don't want to wait any longer. You tilt your head to the side and kiss him back just as desperately as he was. Buck takes this as a good sign and he moves his arms around you and moves his hands up and down your body over your clothes. As the kiss becomes more eager he picks you up by the back of your thighs and carries you to your bedroom. 

Laughing you hold onto him so you won't fall as he walks up the stairs.

 “Don't drop me” 

“Not a chance” he said with a smirk on his face 

Buck sets you down gently on the bed before climbing on top of you and continuing the makeout session you guys had before you guys went upstairs. Your hands went under his shirt dragging your nails up his chest. He got the hint and took the shirt off and went back to hovering over you. Buck kissed you from your lips making his way down to the side of your neck. As buck was doing that you were running your hands everywhere he would let you. Buck pulled back. You got what he was saying with one look so you sat up, taking your shirt off. You reached your hands back to buck’s face and pulled him back down to your lips. Both of you smiled into the kiss. 

Buck moved his head to where he previously left purple bruises on your neck, he kissed over them gently knowing they were probably getting sore. He kissed his way down your body. 

Starting with your lips, making his way down to your neck, then to your breast. Giving each one the same amount of attention before kissing a path down in between them. Taking his time to kiss your stomach before leaning back to take off the shorts to your pajama set, taking off your underwear with it. He then kissed your hip then he moved his lips to the inside of your thighs. You sat up on your elbows to look at him. Buck made eye contact with you before wrapping his arms around your thighs and going to the place you needed him the most. 

When you felt his lips suck at your clit, you leaned back against the pillows not knowing where to put your hands so you were moving your hands from the sheets to the pillow then back down to the sheets under you. Buck stopped and before you could ask him what’s wrong he grabbed your hands and put it in his hair then went back to what he was doing. 

“Buck” you whisper breathlessly as your hands pulled his hair slightly, pushing him closer into you. Your breathing quickened as you got closer to your climax. Buck took two fingers and slowly started a steady rhythm. 

“It's okay just breathe. Breathe for me.” Buck said in a seductive tone. 

Your back arched up as you reached your climax with a moan. Buck climbed back up to your face hovering over you. He was about to speak but before he got a word out you pulled him down to kiss you. While doing that you reached your hand down to his sweatpants and pulled the band towards you which made the band snap back against his skin.

You pulled back “I want these off” 

Buck smiled before getting up and taking off his pants along with his underwear before slowly climbing back on the bed.  As buck hovered over you again he asked “Are you sure? We don’t have to do more than what we just did, I mean i’m more than okay with just stop here- he started to speak nervously. 

You pull him down to kiss him gently before stopping and saying “I'm more sure than i've ever been about anything else.”

Buck chucked before kissing your lips before kissing down to your cheeks and to your neck while he pressed himself to your entrance. You gasped softly as buck slowly entered inch by inch. Once he was settled he groaned and put his head down in between your shoulder and your neck.

“Tell me when you're ready for me to move” Buck said in between kisses on your neck. 

“i’m ready” 

Buck moved his hips back before slowly bringing them back trying to find a rhythm that both he and you liked. 

Your hands went to his back from underneath him, leaving scratch marks on his back. Both of you knew there would be questions about it from your co-workers but they would be dealt with when the time came. 

Buck lifted his head from your neck and went to capture your lips with his. Kissing as he still moved in and out of you at a faster pace than before, chasing after both of your highs. 

The night was filled with groans and soft moans from the both of you. 

[shouldering-worlds]

yes!! because I recently made a joint Content playlist and omfg some of them are totally reaching but its period-accurate!!! that was joint Content!!

yall remember when this was considered joint content. this is why i don’t crash out when dnp don’t post for 3 weeks. this was our standard for YEARS

[https-murdock]

careless - matt murdock

summary: matt often thinks about how careless he was with you

word count: 408

warning:⚠️ angst

note: was feelin angsty after ddba :( i love writing angst its always one of my faves when i get into it. just a lil one i had in my drafts i’ve been adding to, it felt complete, enjoy!

masterlist // join my tag list

it’s careless, the way he’s searching for your touch tonight knowing it’s not there.

on the other side of his bed, it’s as if your warmth basks in his sheets. he can feel it from his position, the way your chest is rising and falling with each breath - it all feels so familiar yet so far away.

there’s something about the way the sun is shining through matt’s new apartment that makes him question how he ended up here - sitting in your shared bed without the feeling of you next to him.

he wonders where he went so wrong.

he thinks of the way you’d laugh at him for the weird positions he sleeps in, the way you’d sometimes sigh in your sleep like you were finally relaxed. he noticed that a lot, you only relaxed when you slept, away from him.

the guilt was always ever present, sitting on his lungs like a heavy push. he knew that what he did was stressful for him, the things he saw and the things he had to do - and yet somehow in the stress of trying to keep up with his own life, he forgot about how hard it was for you to witness so many of his downfalls.

the lock on his door is never actually set, there’s something in matt’s heart that hopes you’ll use your spare key just one more time so he can tell you everything he felt that he was too scared to say when you left.

it’s so unlike him, to be so careless. his direct focus on each breathing thing in his life was a constant - so much that he forgot to check you were also breathing.

each time he allows his eyelids to close, he sees you packing your bags. soft touch still present even when you’d finally had enough of what he was doing - or, more so, what he wasn’t doing.

matt was always a presence, always something you felt around you but somehow that’s all he was in the end. never home, always running off somewhere you weren’t. he was careless with the way he loved you, and that’s something that will hang over him for the rest of his living days.

matt was always acutely aware of the fact he couldn’t see your expressions - but he always knew he could feel them.

what he didn’t understand was how he overlooked them so greatly.

how he let you leave.

— tags 🏷️

@lambmurdock @parker-murdock @silas-aeiou @audreyclimbs @pupmurdock @millennial-birkin @poeticbookwormcat

[junedenim]

exchanges by candle light

hushed things

warnings: smut, mutual mastubation, piv, ambigious relationship status (or something i'm not really sure)

word count: 3.6k

He simply said your name and once again you could feel it happening. Your legs trembled under the big white tablecloth and your head became fuzzy, though you were not drunk. 

He sat opposite. Hunched over a menu. Brown eyes scanned over it. Fluffy brown hair falling over. You can spot a few hairs graying, but he doesn’t want to admit that yet. He had a religious smile playing on his lips. An inner smile that came on and off, governed, as it were, by his private joy in what he heard or saw: a remark you made, the waiter removing the cold dinner plates that served as placeholders and bringing warmed ones, the silk panel curtains blowing inward and brushing your bare, sun-ripened arm. It was the end of a warm London summer.

The sun had set over dinner and a starry night had crawled its way over the city. He folded his hands atop the table in some form of a prayer. You were waiting for the cheque. It had been about ten minutes since Alex had asked for it. The waiting time would usually annoy you but you like him in this shade, a burning light flickering onto his cheek from the candle in between you. 

“I need a new couch,” he said. You had been discussing a mirror you found at an antique shop that you had yet to hang up. He hadn’t offered to help like you had been hoping he would but you’ll ask him later or just get your dad to do it. “Mine has gotten too dirty.”

You hummed, not quite paying attention to the words he is saying. The way his lips are moving is much more interesting. It’s easy to feel the memory of them grazing your skin. The memory is an imprinted permanence. A kiss etched into your hippocampus. 

He casts his eyes down, picking at his napkin. “I need someone to look at the fridge too. The lightbulb went out.” He goes through his laundry lists of to-dos. Some of them have been there for a long time. You can recall them from your last dinner together. Alex doesn’t rush things, just adapts to the issue.

“I don’t know,” you say. “Can you not just replace it?”

He shrugs. “I’m not sure.”

“How many Alexes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?”

He laughs like a child. You can’t get over when he’s amused. It’s like he sucks up all the light in the room and then shines it out onto you. It’s impossible not to smile when he laughs like that. Like it’s just a secret between the two of you. His laugh is an inside joke because you’ve never heard him laugh like that with anyone else. It’s his present to you.

He pays for dinner. You’ll never quite see him in that light again, but you’ll try. You’ll try forever.

*

You sat on his old couch. It was scratched on the sides, slightly worn in the legs, but exuded a vintage quality that fit his appearance. Cool, suave, and handsome with a roughed-up edge. It was like his face. His stare could be intimidating, shaking a girl to her core, but the wrinkles etching into the corners of his eyes had been witness to a lifetime of worn-in smiles.

He took off his jacket and had thrown it on the matching set chair. He sat next to you on the couch, cornering you into the cushions. His arm wrapped around the back and with every word he seemed to move closer. 

“Do you know the word facetiously contains all five vowels and y in alphabetical order?” You think he gets turned on by these facts. The English language is some philter for him, words poisoning his drinks. He moves closer as if your face is the alphabet.

“So does aeiou and sometimes y,” you joke. You lean back as far as possible to taunt and tempt him closer. He leers over you as if you’re a crystal ball and he’s the psychic about to rub up against you.

But then he leans back. He picks up his glass and takes a sip, washing his words down. He spits up, “I’ve started to sleep naked.”

You bite your cheek to prevent a smirk. The corners of your lips fail and it only prompts him to grow smug. “Why’s that?”

He leans his head against the back of the couch. “It’s been a hot summer. Are you hot?”

“A little,” you flirt. “You look like you’re sweating.” His shirt is clean, with no sign of pit stains or overheated skin, but maybe you need to look closer.

 Alex reaches up and yanks on his collar. “Yeah. Just a little.” He unbuttons the top buttons. If he were to turn a little or you were to reach out and tug on the shirt, his nipple would be exposed. His breastbone has a sprinkling of hair, barely qualifying as chest hair. “You’re welcome to cool off.”

You nod but don’t move. You just want to look at him first.

“We should just look at each other,” he says. “I like looking at you. I could get…” he trails off but the message is clear. I could get off on you. It doesn’t count if we don’t touch each other. 

You reach behind you and unzip your dress. “I don’t want to ruin my dress with sweat stains.”

“It’s a pretty dress,” he says earnestly like he’s Tim Gunn or something. He coos at the fabric, enjoying the sight of it dropping to the floor. You sit back down on the couch in your bra and panties. “Nice outfit.”

“Thanks.” It’s blazing. A forest fire in the middle of his house. “Are you going to do a costume change?”

You could write a sonnet to his hands. The firmness of them, the sight of them stroking down his own body. They land on his belt buckle and you think disgusting things about that belt buckle, wanting to taste the metal. “My belt’s a little tight,” he complains. He fusses with it, pulling and pulling until the leather finally pops out. He lets the loose leather lay on his trousers at first, the black blending into the blue. You want to rub the buckle up against his cock. They sit right next to one another, one beginning to push against the fabric. You want to take the hard metal against his skin, push the coolness onto him because it is just too hot.

But you don’t touch. He pops the button off. “Too much at dinner.” You giggle and he smiles. It feels like a blessing. You want it to be ritualistic. It feels too holy to be followed with something so dirty and depraved.

He pushes his thumbs through his waistband. He groans and you’re not sure if it’s sexual or frustration. “Should change into my sweatpants or something.”

You lean closer so he can at least feel the air from your lips pass onto his skin. “But then you’ll be too hot. You’ll sweat.”

He nods like you’ve made some genius analysis. He tilts his head as if he’s pondering the possibilities. As if this isn’t going to end with him dropping his drawers and making you stare at his cock. “Well, then, I guess I just need to cool off first.”

“I don’t think you own shorts. I’ve never seen you in them.” You’re teasing but it’s probably true.

He stands up and finally kicks them off. His underwear is a prison. It’s a shame for something so beautiful to be locked away. “Only swim trunks.”

“We’re not going swimming,” you reason.

Alex sits back down. His shirt is growing wrinkles and looking awkward with his underwear. Something out of Risky Business. “It could be wet,” he enunciates. 

You resist laughter even if your chest rumbles and he is taken away in a fit. You lay your head backward onto the couch. “You wouldn’t know.” Look, don’t touch.

“I can tell.” He’s leaning over. He’s coming too close. One blow of the wind would knock you into one another. “I can tell by just looking at you.” A flame engulfs you. Your face is beet red. Your desire is exposed, front-facing, full-on, your eyes staring at his, directly in his line of vision. “It’s hot.”

He leans back. A river of couch separates the two of you. “Don’t ruin your shirt,” you tell him. “It looks nice.”

He sounds in agreement and undoes the remaining buttons. He then neatly folds it with such care you almost give in and tell him to touch you the way he touches the fabric. To fold you into pieces and lay you down with as much caution as he lays his shirt on the coffee table. “Your bra looks too nice to be on this dirty of a couch.”

“You think?” You question and he answers with a nod. You sit forward and unclip the bra. You slip the straps off your shoulder. You don’t care for the article like Alex seems to care about his clothes. You unflinchingly throw it onto the floor. You wonder if he wishes you would do that with him. Maybe he connotes the care of objects with the sexual tension you’re both facing.

“You’re wearing a matching set,” he notes. His eyes stare straight at your covered pussy with no possibility of misinterpreting.

“Did you just wash those?” You stare straight at his cock. It’s a poor excuse but it allows you to see it.

You both stand and slide off the last remaining article. You both sit back down. You want to ask him if this is the reason he needs the new couch and this one has been dirtied by the asses of women he has brought back here. Maybe you should check yourself after this just in case the girl before you had infected it so badly. It’s too gross to ask something like that.

His hand is on his cock. He’s not stroking it, he’s barely touching it. His hand simply lays over, almost covering it. You hate him for shielding the sight for you. “I’m gonna take care of this.” He gestures his head toward his cock as if that’s something casual to say that doesn’t burn holes through you.

“Okay,” you mutter. He makes a fist around it. It’s terrifying to look at. The simple sight of something gives you so much desire it feels like it could kill you.

He doesn’t care to hint around things anymore. This is the frustrating part. So, he insists, “Touch yourself. It’s okay.”

There’s no rebuttals anymore. Just moans and hot breathing. Your hands slide their way through your wetness. They find their place, the one that feels rightful. Women and men were created to place their hands here. There’s a reason people call this pleasure sinful: because it feels too good. You feel unworthy.

Looking at him while he strokes himself in slow, controlled motions is immoral and unforgivable but the act itself is divine. There’s a reason the statue of David is worshipped. The nude body is an art form and watching him play with himself is like watching the statue be carved away. He’s revealing himself to you. No shame.

He stares directly into your eyes. He wants to see the pleasure shoot through you. He wants your feelings to transmit through the air and penetrate into him. Your leg jerks and he moans at the sight of it. Every motion you make sets him off further. He picks up the pace and you follow, feeling the need to copy his every move.

You want to give him more. You reach your other hand up and pinch your nipple. His eyelids flutter and his head collapses back onto the cushion. “Fuck,” he mumbles. “Do you do that every time?” He asks the question like it’s a Q&A. It makes answering it feel more excusable.

“No,” you say. “Only when I’m really turned on.”

He can’t bear to look at you. You can see his knuckles turn white and his movements are furious. So you follow suit the best way you can. You want to fuck yourself up and serve it to him on a plate. You want to lick him like he licked his plate. You want him to swallow you whole, wash you down with a swig from his glass.

“You feel that?�� He asks like there’s a rumbling through the earth. It’s close and you both can feel it. He looks at you, keeping you in line with his rhythm. Each move and intention is in sync. His hips buck up and he leans forward, beating himself off quicker. “Fuck.” It’s guttural and uncontrollable.

Your knees knock into one another, and it’s unbearable to restrain yourself any longer. “Fucking hell,” you moan. It overcomes you, and he can barely keep himself up straight, but he’s someone able to look at you, and you can’t take it anymore, so you let go.

Alex flops back and rubs himself raw. He can’t let this moment pass. He can’t see straight anymore. He gets off on your breathing, on the whimper you let out as you grow sensitive. It’s enough. It’s enough to shoot out onto his stomach and not give a single fuck about a drop landing elsewhere. He doesn’t care if he stains the couch. He kind of hopes he does.

*

“I had a good time,” he says over the phone. “Before and after.” He laughs awkwardly in a disjointed fashion. There’s a shyness to him, something that tells you he could only say this over the phone, not when looking you in the eye.

“Me too.” It’s hard to say much more. It feels like something that shouldn’t be said out loud. It’s a whisper���the wind of his voice in your ear.

“I’ve never had sex without touching someone.” You wonder if he’s touching himself now. The breathiness in his voice makes it sound like he is.

“That wasn’t sex.” Technically speaking, it wasn’t. It was the whole point of not touching each other. 

“I guess. I don’t know how kindly the courts would take that.” There wasn’t much of a difference whether you touched each other or not. It still burned everyone all the same.

“We should have just fucked then.”

“Yeah.” He pauses. You think he licks his lips. “We should have.”

*

Two mornings later, he rang and asked if there was a chance of you meeting that night. You said yes because you had no plans, and at least you would seal your secret decently. 

He brought you home. You noticed when you were in bed that he had put cologne on his shoulder and that he must have set out to dinner with the hope—if not the intention—of sleeping with you. You liked the taste of his skin better than the chemical, and you had to tell him so. 

He just laughed.

You focus for a moment on their various smells as you inhale his, which reminds you of a garden. It was not parsley, not sage, not rosemary, not thyme, but some nonexistent herb compounded of those four smells. On this second occasion, your lovemaking was more relaxed.

It’s in his bed, and the air isn’t on fire and threatening to snap the room in half. He slides your clothes off of you, and you stick your hand down his pants to hear that hitch in his breath. He mouths at your nipple, touching it the way you had tempted him before.

You fist his cock like he had taunted you, squeeze your fingers around him to watch him squirm. His breath hisses before he pushes you down and runs his cock through you, his eyes no longer begging to feel the witness. “You like this?” He painfully hovers over you.

Quickly and eagerly, you nod. “Stick it in,” you demand.

He lets out a sound that crosses between a moan and a chuckle. He pushes in, sinking, sinking, sinking, until he hits the ocean floor. He kisses your collarbone in reverence, sealing his fate. You’ve both given in, sacrificing something in this act.

*

“You’re going to make a greedy woman out of me,” you say. “I’m not going to be able to let go of you now.”

You hide your face in his neck. You can’t even look him in the eye now out of fear he’ll pull away, instead, his grip tightens. “Hold on then.” He drags his hand up your spine, sending a shiver down it. “I’ll handle it.”

*

You were sitting on the bed, naked, eating out of a shared bag of chips. Your skin grew bumpy from both his touch and the temperature. It was now well into autumn and the afternoons got chilly. 

His face and bare chest look enriched under the midday light. He had a dusting of crumbs on his skin in the sheet resting at his hips. You moved to lie down on your stomach. His hand combed through your hair, pushing it back, away from your forehead. “Don’t fall asleep on me.”

You hum to show you're alive. “I’m comfortable.”

“I should go,” he told you. “It’s getting late.” It was 4 o’clock, but you knew what he meant.

You sat up with a sleepy look. He grabbed both sides of your face and pulled you in. A kiss to your lips, ripping through your being. You kiss his cheek to show silent affection.

“I’ll call you,” he promises. He pulls away and goes to put his clothes back on, disconnecting the fantasy. “Try and see you soon.”

You nod and fall onto your back. You cover yourself. If you don’t get to see him, he doesn’t get to see you. He leans over and kisses your forehead. He’s out the door within a minute.

*

One day, he shows up outside your place. He lowers the window to his car and smiles, pulling on the invisible rope, stringing you to him. You get into the car but don’t drive anywhere, not yet, at least. The gear lever sits in the way of your knees, so you move to the back seat. His face is cold when you kiss. The night is getting dark quicker.

“You’ve been drinking,” he says.

“Yes. I was lonely,” you unashamedly admit.

“Me too,” he agrees. “Not drinking, but lonely.” He kisses you again. His lips are cold like the ice in your cocktail glasses. “Tell me everything.” You’re not sure what he means. If it’s a whisper of secrets, the things you wouldn’t tell another soul, or how you ended up drunk in the backseat of his car on a Monday night.

Before you could talk, you were kissing again. At one point during the kiss, you open your eyes to steal a look at his face. The street light was shining directly on the car. His eyes were closed tight, the crinkles embedded by his eyes, his lashes trembling on his cheeks, and his face seemed to fit right in your hands.

You close your eyes and think only of his lips and his cold hands and the warm heart beating beneath his jacket. You took off your coat. He pushed up the sleeves of your shirt and kissed up your arms from wrist to elbow in light, consecutive kisses. It made you giggle and jump, ticklish from his touch.

“You want to go somewhere?” He asks.

“Where?”

“I don’t know,” he says, “but let’s drive somewhere.”

You moved into the front seat and he drove off. He takes your hand, his grasp both delicate and harsh. You can feel the lines of him. The ride was silent, spoken only through the shared touch of your hands. Every once in a while, his thumb would move, stroking the back of your hand.

You reached a small beach on a soft, wet, sandy land. You watched the moon. It grazed his skin just right, bathed in a natural glow. It was as if he were the man in the moon. His voice was sleepy and you liked the thought of falling asleep here. There was something beautiful about falling asleep by water, even if that water was shallow and only waved in tiny ripples.

“Can you skip stones?” You ask.

He nods and rubs his eye.

“Can you teach me?”

You both stand and make a pile of rocks. He takes a few attempts before achieving the objective. He then stands behind you and guides your arm. It seems juvenile, something a girl would blush over on her first date with a boy. In a rare moment, something that has your body rubbing up against one another feels more romantic than sexual.

When you get the hang of it, he sits back down, growing late with the hour, and watches you. Your bare feet stomp into the wet sand, you throw the remaining stones, and dip your feet through the water. You kick your foot through, splashing him with tiny droplets.

He doesn’t laugh or scold you. He gives you a sleepy smile and you decide it’s best to go home now rather than risk sleeping here with the fishes and whatever else crawls and swims in this area. 

Alex backs the car out. The water splashes over the smooth sand, and you know that it will wash away your footprints and you will never come back and find them. Or the rocks that had sunk into the swallow water and floated downstream.

Alex dropped you off and you only said good night. No touching.

*

a/n: not sure what this is but it's something. or just porn. i'm not sure. i also wrote this in like 2 hours without stopping, which hasn't happened in like...ever.

[spidermans-l-o-v-e-r]

Adventures in Babysitting

Pairing: Eddie Diaz x Reader

Word count: 2.9k

Notes: I’m gonna make a new header, like I just want o p t i o n s. Also, I’m hungry

@silas-aeiou You don't get a cute dedication. I hate you. I would have made that yellow, but you know they don't actually have yellow. So you know.... Orange. Like your bedspread that I think is orange.

Eddie was irritated. 

There was a lot in life he let slide, a lot that he knew there was nothing he could do and so he let it go. 

But this? Oh, this could have been prevented. 

“You’re gonna get frown lines,” You comment lazily from your spot in the sun. You’d curled up like a cat sunbathing and pulled out your Kindle about three hours ago, and aside from the occasional glass of water and getting him lunch, you hadn’t moved. 

“You’re gonna get frown lines.” He mocks you, his arms folded across his chest and a deep pout graces his lips. Your eyes flick up from the device and you stick your tongue out at him before going back to your book. 

“What are you even reading?” 

He’s bored out of his mind, and pretty much all he’s got to do is bother you or watch TV, and lord knows there’s nothing good on TV.

“You’ve asked me that three times. It’s still the same book”

“The same book you won’t tell me the name of?” He whines and awkwardly flops forward on the couch onto his tummy. He props his chin in his hands and bends his good knee. He’d cross his ankles if that damn brace wasn’t in the way.

“Because you’re going to Google it, and I don’t need you to know anything about what I’m reading” 

“But I want to know. Please Y/N, please? I promise I won’t bother you anymore! You won’t hear a peep out of me!” He gives you his sweetest, most innocent smile and bats his eyelashes, and you groan and drop your hand to the couch because you know he’s not going to leave you alone this time. 

And maybe, just maybe. Those stupid brown eyes really work on you. 

“It’s called-” You hesitate for a second and sigh “—” 

“Okay.” He shrugs and stuffs a pillow under his chin and goes on his phone, and you stare at him 

“Okay? That’s it? You’ve been bothering me this entire time and all you’ve got to say is “Okay” really??” 

“I feel like I need to give you lessons on how to annoy someone.” 

“Ugh!!” 

You toss your kindle down to run away from his ass and he laughs as you stomp your way into his kitchen for a snack. 

“Get me a smoothie!”

“Fuck you and your smoothie!” 

After a half hour of letting him go thirsty, you shove his stupid smoothie bottle into his hand and plop back down on the couch with your snack. He gives you those stupid eyes again and bats his eyelashes, and you hand him the plate you’ve made him.

“Awww, you do care!” 

“I’m literally going to punch you in the knee.” 

Eddie’s mouth drops as he looks at the brace. He slaps his hand over his chest, and you roll your eyes at his dramatics.

“I am wounded.” 

“Yes, yes, I know you sprained your ACL.” He’d told the story at least 10 times already.

“I was saving a child!”

“Saving a child” 

“Have I ever mentioned how much I hated you?” He narrows his eyes, and you bat your eyelashes at him this time. 

“Maybe I need to give you lessons in annoying someone?” 

He stares at you for a second before sighing and balancing his plate on his chest.

“Touché” 

You didn’t actually mind watching after him. It was fun most of the time, just not when he was bored out of his mind. Your Auntie Athena had called you up, asking for a big favor. You had some medical training, and you weren’t really doing anything these days, so she asked you to come babysit a friend for her. When Buck answered the door that morning, you already felt the blush on your cheeks, and you nearly fell over when he introduced you to Eddie, the baby you would be sitting. 

Too bad he was annoying because he was fine as hell. 

“Can you grab me my wallet?” He mutters, and you get up to grab it. All in all, he was a pretty good patient. He didn’t ask for much, and unless he wanted to bother you, he was pretty polite about it… though you did have to convince him that it was okay to ask you to go to the bathroom whenever he needed and he didn’t have to hold it.

All in a day's work. 

You hand him his wallet, and he thanks you with that smile that made you weak, and you go back to plop on the couch. It was almost time to start dinner, and you hadn’t really gotten around to thinking about what to make. 

“Anything in particular you want for dinner?” You ask with a yawn, and he shrugs

“I just got us some pizza, You’ve been doing so much for me that I didn’t want you to have to make dinner too on top of all this.”

“Eddie,” you scold him softly. “You didn’t have to do that. I’d gladly make you dinner. It’s my job.”

“Oh? That’s all I am to you? A job” He pouts and you smirk and get up from the other couch, You flop down next to him and lean into his side 

“Nah, we’re friends now. I think I’ve accidentally seen your dick like three times today so personally, I think that makes us friends for life” 

“Mhm. Were you impressed?” 

He’s teasing, you know he is, but when he combines the question whilst putting his arm around your shoulders, you suddenly can’t breathe. 

“Uh- I mean-” You stutter and he’s got this stupid smile that you can’t tell what it means. 

“I was just kidding, Jeez Y/N.” 

You awkwardly laugh with him and try to wriggle from his arm but he keeps you there, in fact, he leans over himself and puts his head on your shoulder. 

“You mind if I take a little nap?”

“Oh sure, You want me to take you to your room?” You start to get up but he holds you in place again and you squeak 

“No this is good, wake me when the pizza gets here?” He takes the throw from the back of the couch and tosses it over both of you.

“O-okay” 

You’re so tense, like so tense that after about five minutes you hear Eddie start to snicker. 

“You want me to just use the pillows?” He doesn't even open his eyes when he speaks and you look over at him. 

“N-no It’s okay”

“You sure? I don't think you’ve taken more than five breaths this entire time”

“I’m sure” You take a slow breath and he gets up anyway, you bite back the frown when he moves away but he starts to push you back. 

“Okay, well if that’s the case I think I’d be more comfortable like this.”

You lay on your back and Eddie lays between you and the couch. He puts his arm around your waist and lays his head on your chest, you blush when he makes himself a little more comfy by nuzzling just a bit into your chest.

“You gonna breathe this time?” 

“Uh-huh”

“Good girl” 

He can hear the sharp inhale and practically feel the shiver go down your spine when he says that and he closes his eyes with a big smile because you’re reacting exactly how he thought you would. 

Eddie doesn’t get much sleep until you’ve finally gotten out of your head and started to calm down, your fingers thread through his soft hair and he feels his body relax against yours. He tried to stay awake, admittedly fake sleeping just to be close to you was almost as fuck boy as asking if you were impressed was but he just wanted to be near you.

He’d been sneaking glances at you all day, watching all your reactions to that book you were reading… which he’d bought immediately when you gave him his wallet and had read all the warnings for it and…

Jesus Christ.

But anyway, he just wanted to be close to you, because you were pretty and soft and you smelled good and pretty soon you’re shaking his shoulder gently and he’s lifting his head and settling his chin between your breasts and your eyes widen a little but you keep stroking his hair and he leans into your touch and you smile at him. 

“The pizzas here, you gotta let me up, babe” 

It’s like just a completely normal pet name, you’d even mentioned earlier that you used it in your everyday freaking conversation but god the way you say it to him. 

A man can dream.

He pushes away just enough for you to slip out from under him and go over to the door, he’s unabashedly staring at your ass while you give the kid a tip and grab the pizza from him and bring it in.

“You sure this is big enough?” You show him the giant ass box and pass by him to the dining room and he uses his cane to awkwardly get up from the couch. You drop the box and rush over to help catch him and he stumbles over into your arms. 

“You’re not supposed to be getting up by yourself!” You help him over to the dining room table and pick his leg up to put it on the other chair.

“I know I know, I just feel bad.” 

“Eddie this is my job! I want to take care of you. You know you deserve help, right? You’re injured and you need help, and I want to give that to you. I’m more than happy to.” 

It’s not… that deep. He knows you don’t mean it like that. But it hits home, and it hits home hard. He watches you walk to the kitchen to grab some plates, his eyes lingering on your plush hips.

Where did you get off telling him what was good for him… even if you know it was technically true? He watches you come in and serve him up a plate and hold it out to him.

“Are you gonna let me help?”

He looks at the plate, slowly taking it from you and setting it down in his lap.

“Yeah.” 

After that Eddie turns into an absolute baby. It’s small things, “Can you get me a napkin” “Will you hand me the remote?” “Can I have another soda?”

But then it’s “Will you sit by me?” And “Can I lean against you again?” 

And somehow it ends with your back against the armrest and him between your legs, using them as armrests. He tilts his head back and you’re running your fingers through his hair and giving him a scalp massage and he’s melting into your lap.

“Ohh that’s good” He’s practically purring as he snuggles into you and you smile.

“Oh really?” Your fingertips start working his neck and down his shoulders. He scoots forward a little and you’re working out all the knots at the base of his neck.

“You wanna go lie down maybe? I can work on your back” 

“Oh, that’s asking way too much” His head flops backward like he’s so comfy he can’t hold it up and you work your way out from underneath him. 

“Come on, let’s get you in bed, you should probably go goin there anyway, you need your rest” 

He whines and makes you tug him up off the couch and help him hobble to his bedroom. 

“You wanna get into your pajamas?” 

“It’s like 8 pm” He frowns but lifts his shirt over his head anyway. You blush and look away for a second to “grab his shorts” and hand them out to him. He smirks and takes them from you, purposely brushing his fingers against yours. 

“You know, Buck helped me get dressed this morning, if it’s necessary I can ask him to come over again.” 

Buck had literally gotten three pairs of jeans when Eddie got hurt and had one leg hemmed to work with the big ass brace he had to wear it had a zipper down the side that he could just undo and take off the other side normally. 

“These jeans are weird as hell, but I appreciate him” 

“At least he didn’t put you in booty shorts.” 

“He tried.” He deadpans and you giggle and come over to him. Your fingers fiddle with his belt and he bites his lip and watches you unbuckle it and put it on the bed. You work open his jeans and unzip them for him and then go to the weird side zipper and do that too. 

“You know, if you wanted to get my pants off all you had to do was ask” 

You roll your eyes and get down on your knees to help him get the jeans down.

“You’ve been waiting to use that one all day haven’t you?” 

“As a matter of fact, yes. Yes, I have.” 

Your laugh gets caught in your throat when you look up at him, he has this hunger in his eyes that makes your cheeks flare bright pink. He reaches down and cups the back of your head, stroking your hair softly. 

“You know… you look kinda pretty like this” He mumbles and you lean forward just a little closer to him.

“I do?” You make your eyes wider, sweeter and he nearly passes out. 

“Jesus” He scoffs and pushes your head away and you fall on your butt with a laugh. You get up and help him into bed and then settle on top of him. 

He groans comfortably under your weight and you get to work on his back. It does not surprise you in any way shape or form that he’s a mess of tension and knots. You especially focus on his shoulders and you’ve got him moaning and whimpering like a slut. 

“You sound like a bitch” You wheeze and he tries to throw you off his back and you squeal and hold his shoulders.

“I’ll have your ass know I take pride in sounding like a little bitch okay. If my girl is making me sound that way? She must be doing something right” 

“Your girl?” You perk up a little and lean down onto him, your chest pressed into his back 

“Yeah, you’re my girl right?” 

Eddie was too damn friendly for his own good. He props himself up on his elbows just to feel you press harder against him. He can feel your nipples poking through your shirt. 

“Yeah I’m your girl” 

He lets his head hang down and you go back to massaging his neck. He sighs dreamily and lays his head back on the pillows. 

“You’re gonna put me to sleep” 

“Good. You really need to rest” You climb from his back and he misses you already. You help him turn over onto his back and put the covers over him. 

“Remember, I’ve got my phone on, so call me for anything and everything. Got it?”

“Got it” He waves his phone at you and you smile and head for the door. 

“Goodnight Eddie” 

“No goodnight kiss for me?” 

You stop in your tracks and try to ignore the chuckle under his breath. You turn around slowly and put your hands on your hips.

“I just feel like it would make me feel better”

He says it in the cutest voice with the most adorable pout on his lips and you just groan and stomp back over to the bed.

“You are the biggest, fattest, baby I’ve ever known in my entire life”

“Uh-huh” 

“And I cannot believe,” you lean down to kiss his forehead “That your ass is making me-“

He lifts his head just in time to connect with your lips, his hand comes flying down and keeps your lips against his because he knows damn well that you’re about to try and run from it. 

Damn, he’s good. 

His fingers wrap around your hair and tug gently and you sigh, softening every bit of rigid awkwardness and letting him kiss you. You place your hand on his chest and he grins and pulls you closer to him and onto his lap. 

You lean down and cup his face, moving your lips in sync with his and he pulls you down onto his chest to feel you against him again. He kisses you until you’re both breathless until he knows you won’t run away from him until he’s sure he’s gotten his “I’m really into you” point across. 

You both pull away panting and you flop over onto the bed next to him. You wait until you’ve got some of your senses back and turn your head to look at him. 

“Nurses shouldn’t have relationships with their patients” 

“It’s so sexy when they do though” 

“I should punch you in the knee for that move” 

“You should, but I don’t think you will.” 

He scoots closer and nuzzles his nose against yours and you smile and peck his lips. 

“You wanna sleep in here tonight?” 

He offers because he likes you, and it’s been a hot minute since he had that kind of company. He’s going to be thinking about a lot of baseball tonight. 

“Okay, on one condition” 

“Anything” 

“From now on? You let me take care of you without putting up a fight… and give you a sponge bath” 

“Oh god, fucking deal baby girl” 

[shouldering-worlds]

I think that this theory about why they filmed out of some context that may be relevant. they have always filmed these rituals and such. they're the biggest most popular craft channel on YouTube. They commodify their experiences and life by sharing it online to everyone. I like your theory, but I really like the idea of it being entangled directly with the fact that they are YouTubers and posting this online.

DanAndPhilCrafts-Slime: an analysis based off the basic components.

i’ve seen a lot of discussion and essays about the subject and subtext of the slime video, but what about the basic components, costume, cinematography, editing and the sound? after rewatching with those things in mind, i have some thoughts.

the first thing that really stood out to me about this video compared to the others, is their matching clothes. they blend into the background and the table in front of them, the neutral colors make the slimes stand out more, as well as bringing the “stereotypical” cult feeling of a costume. a unified front and a sign of belonging. see: Midsommar (2019).

more than that, it’s an off-white color. white, in western and european cultures, typically represents cleanliness and a fresh start. innocence, purity and perfection are other common associations to the color. the off-white, light gray color, can in this case symbolize that they have been purified to some degree, and perhaps this ritual and sacrifice will bring them to a true fresh start. in Squareflakes, Glitter Faces and Potato Prints, they have both been wearing their normal clothes, but considering the sacrifice in Potato Prints, it’s not impossible to imagine that they have now been accepted into the cult.

now, to the footage when they have left the house. what could this documentation be for? the camerawork is shaky and disorienting, signaling that they are not in the right state of mind and focused on the matter at hand. so why film? my primary theory is about the rest of the cult. they mention a “mother”, but not with the same respect as to when they mention “Him”. what if this “mother” is the creator of the cult and they are filming this for her? considering that they look straight into camera after the ritual is complete, this seems to be the most likely theory.

my secondary theory is that they simply want to have a record of what they did, to bring awareness about Him into the world. the reasoning for this is that the footage seems to be in chronological order, making it easy for whoever found it to simply compile it into one sequence. this doesn’t seem too likely however, considering the jumpcuts in certain sections as well as the seemingly non-diegetic music.

so what could this all mean? my final theory is that the channel started out as dan and phil proving their worth to mother and following the sacrifice in Potato Prints, they were accepted and the channel was taken over by mother. considering the ending, it would be very likely that something has happened to both dan and phil following the summoning. if He was only interested in a vessel (phil), He wouldn’t have been interacting with dan. leading it to be most likely that mother either found the footage herself or found it through government files (explaining the document in the beginning) and uploading it to the channel.

[kayhi808]

First crush ask

- what would be the reader and bucky's first fight like??? How would abby react? What would it be about??

Ps. I love first crush so much!!! You are such an amazing writer!!!

Hi, my little Nonnie! Thank you so much! I'm happy you're enjoying First Crush.

What would your first fight be about? In the beginning of your relationship, you were upset about the risks he was taking on his missions and was thinking about ending things before it even started.

But a fight that Abby was a witness to...🤔

I want to say that Bucky tried to interfere with your job. You were proud about landing this job and you took great pride in excelling and doing well. Bucky may have gone behind your back to Fury saying how overworked you were. Nick Fury doesn't sugar coat anything so he confronted you and you felt embarrassed and humiliated. Bucky just wanted you to have the softest life possible and if he can make that happen he will.

Abby could tell you had been crying, "Mama? What happen?" She rubs circles into your arm trying to calm you, like you do to her.

You kiss her forehead, "It was just a really bad day at work, but I'm ok." Abby still looks at you with concern. "I could really use one of your hugs though."

Abby smiles and climbs into your lap for a snuggle. "Shhhh. I'm here's, Mama. It ok." You give a weak laugh and hug her closer.

There's a firm knock at the door, "Y/N?"

Abby gets up and happily runs to the door, "Bucky!"

Shit! You get up to open the door, but block Bucky from entering your apartment. Abby squeezes through and hugs Bucky's leg, "Hi!" She looks up at him with a big smile.

"Hey Abby," he lifts her placing a soft kiss on her cheek. Bucky looks at you, "Please, doll, can we talk?"

"It's been a long day and I'm really tired," your voice cracks, "I don't want to talk."

Abby hears your voice and looks back at you and she knows something is very wrong. "Mama?" She wiggles until Bucky puts her down and she holds your hand as she watches you brush away a stray tear with your shoulder.

"Doll, please. I'm so sorry."

Abby looks between the two of you and frowns at Bucky, "what did yous do to my Mama?" She tries to pull you inside the apartment, away from Bucky. "You makes her cry?"

You exhale, "remember how I said it was a bad day? Mama is just real tired."

Again with her shoulders hiked up to under her ears and her hands spread wide, "Den why he says sowwy? What he sowwy for? Hmmm?" That's a good question. I don't know.

"I hurt your Mama's feelings, but I didn't mean to. I'm very very sorry."

Abby quickly rushes forward and punches Bucky, almost hitting him in the groin, close enough to make him lose his breath. "Abigail!" You grab her arm as she's ready to take a second swing at him. "Stop it."

"You hurt my Mama in her heart?! That's bad!"

"Hey, look at me. How about you pick out your PJs and stories early? Once you're done, I'll start dinner, ok?"

"2 stories?"

"3"

Anger forgotten, "3 stories!?" She squeals, "Tank you, Mama! G'night Bucky!" She skips off to her room.

"You ok?"

"She almost punched me in the balls and she gets 3 stories?"

"If she actually did, I'd have told her 5." Bucky huffs out a quiet chuckle. "You hurt me in my heart. You deserved it."

"Sweetheart, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." You silently nod. "If I call you later tonight, will you answer?"

You look at him and his eyes are filled with remorse and you do love him. So much. "We'll talk later." He presses his lips to your forehead and leaves.

@waywardhunter95 @wintrsoldrluvr @rebeccapineapple @ordelixx @onceithough @thezombieprostitute @ilovetaquitosmmmm @julvrs @unaxv @s-a-v-a-n-a-34 @winterslove1917 @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 @mrsnikstan @hisredheadedgoddess28 @itsteambarnes @otterlycanadian @purplecolordeer @samsgirl93 @buckitostan @littleredwolf @mcucatlady @silas-aeiou @hzdhrtss @florie1 @thecubanator2 @enchantedbarnes @selella @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @cjand10 @pancake-05 @ozwriterchick @crazyunsexycool @baw1066 @nommingonfood @jvanilly

[siampie]

Risk and Reward || Chapter 12: Surrender

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 3.7k

Summary: You and Matt talk about his secret identity.

Warnings/tags: 18+ MDNI, smut, p in v, oral (female receiving)

A/N: Commentaries and reblogs are greatly appreciated.     

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Dividers by @cafekitsune

Song the title is referring to:

No one will win this time

Whenever you’re ready

Whenever you’re ready

Can we, can we surrender?

Can we, can we surrender?

I surrender

“I’m Daredevil.”

You almost forgot how to breathe. Your jaw dropped open. You didn’t think you heard him right. He couldn’t be the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. This was Matt. Your boyfriend. He was blind and clumsy and—there was no way for him to be able to do the things the Devil could do.

You had not known much about the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. Never even had laid eyes on him.

You had seen grainy footages of the vigilante in action. He was graceful, efficient and brutal. This couldn’t be Matt. His hands weren’t meant to hurt others. They were always gentle when they touched you. You refused to believe that Matt was the Devil. He couldn’t be.

They were two different people.

“No,” you stood up from the couch. “You can’t be—him. You’re blind!” You ran your fingers through your hair. “This is another lie!”

“I promised.” His hand came on top of the horned cowl, “No more lies,” he reminded you. “I am Daredevil.”

You stared at him for a long while. Your eyes roaming his face for any signs of a lie, anything. His head tilted slightly to the side, his unseeing eyes focusing on your chest area. Subconsciously, you brought your hand to your chest, feeling your own erratic heartbeat under your fingertips.

You couldn’t believe it. He let out a long breath, and dropped his gaze to the ground. Quiet.

He wasn’t lying.

“Oh, my god,” you breathed out before dropping back into the couch.

You rubbed your hands down your face, before bringing them back up, running them through your hair. This wasn’t possible.

You reached out for the glass of water, and decided against it.

“Do you have anything stronger than water?” You asked him.

He snorted, “yeah,” he got up.

Your ears were ringing, and your mind was buzzing. Floored by this bit of information, this huge reveal, you were trying to make sense of it all. To wrap your mind around the fact that your sweet boyfriend was in fact the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen.

“Sweet Jesus!” You swore with a shaky breath.

“Sweetheart,” he called softly, handing a glass filled with amber liquid. He sat down next to you, still putting some distance between you. “Talk to me.”

You took a sip of your drink, savoring the slight burn down your throat. You pushed out a sigh, “I don’t really know what to say.”

“I know it’s a lot to take in,” Matt said.

“Understatement of the year,” you gave out a wry laugh. He remained quiet as you struggled to find your words. “How?” You turned to him, “how do you do all this?”

“Remember how I became blind?”

“Yeah, you told me. Chemicals.”

“Well, my other senses were all affected,” Matt said. “Heightened. I can’t see, not like everyone else but I can—sense things about you.”

“Such as?”

“Well—I know you had lunch at the Chinese restaurant near your workplace,” Matt told you, “And that you ordered your favorite. Fried rice, I can smell it on you.” Your breath hitched in your throat. “And I know what I’m saying is making you nervous, because I can hear your heartbeat.”

Your hand found your chest again. Remembering what he did earlier, “is that what you were doing?” His brows creased together, confused by your words. “Earlier. That head tilt of yours—you were listening to my heartbeat?”

“I was,” he nodded. “I do. Often.”

“This—this is a lot,” you dropped your face into your hands. “Does it ever get overwhelming? To hear heartbeats or to smell things others can’t? Isn’t it too much?”

He shrugged, “it can be. But I learned to—to block it out over the years.”

You stood up, picking up your glass, and you downed your drink. Wincing as it burned your throat on its way down. Matt remained quiet, his head tilting slightly. Listening to your heartbeat, your breathing. Giving you space to process. He knew this was a lot to take in. He clasped his hands together, tightly. Knuckles turning white with how hard he was clenching them together. You seemed to be taking it better than Karen and Foggy. Still, he was afraid. Afraid that you may decide to walk away from him. Afraid that you would ask him to stop.

You stood, looking out of the window, your arms crossed over your chest. Letting out a deep breath, you tried to wrap your head around it. His confession was not what you were expecting. You were prepared for everything else. A break up, because he no longer wanted to be with you anymore. Because you were too much to handle. Or not enough for him to stay in the relationship. But this. This was definitely not in the realms of possibilities. Matt being a vigilante was not on your bingo card.

Still, you felt relieved. You were relieved that he was a vigilante. How messed up were you?

“I suppose Karen and Foggy know—about you,” your voice broke the silence that had settled over you. “That’s why they covered for you.”

“Yes. They know.” Matt nodded.

You turned to face him, “why? Why are you doing it?”

“Because I can hear them,” he said quietly. “People asking for help. Suffering. Praying.” You walked back to him, sitting down on the coffee table, facing him. “I couldn’t just sit back. Not when I can do something about it.”

“You’re a lawyer. Why can’t you do something about it as a lawyer? Helping them—by going through the system.”

“Sometimes the law isn’t enough.”

Your eyes landed on his hands, tightly wrapped around each other. You reached out, and took one of his hands in yours. His free hand landing on one of your knees.

“I never meant to hurt you, sweetheart,” he squeezed your knee gently. “I just—didn’t know how to tell you.”

Your eyes roamed his face. Fear was written all over it; in the way his brows were pulled together. In the way his jaw was clenched, bracing himself for your answer. Whether good or bad, he would take it. And accept it. Even if, it broke his heart.

“I get that. Now. I—this is—this is big. But you did, you hurt me. You let me believe that—”

“I know,” his hand squeezed yours tightly, your eyes fell on his fingers wrapped around your hand. “And I’m sorry. I never—” he paused, his tongue darted out to wet his lips, “—wanted you to think that you were at fault. This was on me. Not you.” His free hand came up to your face. His unseeing eyes stared right through you. Fondness very apparent in his gaze.

“If I didn’t push you tonight, were you ever going to tell me?” You asked him.

His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed his saliva, “Yes. I just—I was dreading your reaction more than anything. I thought telling you the truth would scare you away.”

“So, you thought lying would keep me close?” He shrugged off one of his shoulders, his silence loud and clear. He did think you would leave. “Matt—” you shook your head, pulling his hand down to your lap. “I get why you lied, okay? I do. This is huge and—it’s not exactly something you throw in a casual conversation. I mean how do you tell your girlfriend you moonlight as the Devil at night?” He scoffed, and you chuckled. A deep breath left your lungs, “still, I’m hurt.”

“I never meant for this,” his chin wobbled, as his lips turned down into a frown.

Your hands cupped his face, your forehead dropping against his. “I know. I know,” your thumbs brushed away the few stray tears that dropped down his face. “I’m sorry—I’m sorry you didn’t think you could trust me with this, I guess.”

“No, sweetheart, I—I trust you. I do.” His fingers wrapped gently around your wrists. And for a moment you breathed the same air. “I was afraid that knowing—that part of me would change the way you feel about me.”

“Well, it doesn’t. It doesn’t change the way I feel about you. Nothing could do that,” you assured him. “Don’t get me wrong this is huge. And it will take some getting used to but I—my feelings for you won’t change.”

Your lips brushed against his in a soft and gentle kiss. Sealing your words as a promise to him. You were already in too deep. Your feelings for Matt Murdock won’t change. Not completely. You knew deep within yourself that they could only grow stronger. Deeper.

“Matt—” his hands moved to rest against your shoulders. “I want all of you. The good. The bad. I can handle it. Trust that I can. Please?” You pulled away slightly so you could stare in his warm and sightless eyes. “It’s not going to be easy. But I don’t really care for easy. It’s overrated anyway.” A small smile pulled at your lips. “I’m not going anywhere. I won’t walk away from you. And I’m sorry that I did tonight. It won’t happen again.” Your hands travelled down to the back of his neck. “I’m not going to hurt you. All I’m asking in exchange is no more lies. I can’t deal with the lies.”

“I won’t lie to you ever again, I promise.” He brushed his nose against yours. “I don’t deserve you,” Matt whispered, his breath fanning over your face. His eyes fell shut as he inhaled deeply.

“Maybe, I’m the one who’s not deserving you.” You said back quietly.

You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, moving onto his lap. You buried your nose in the crook of his neck. “You deserve better.” His lips brushed against your skin, sending shivers down your spine.

“I don’t want better. I just want you.” Your arms tightened around his shoulders.

No lie was told. Your heart beat steadily as those words flew past your lips. Dizzy with relief, he still couldn’t believe that you were still there. That you listened. He was convinced this was the end. But you were still in his arms. And you weren’t going anywhere.

“So, how does it feel?” You asked him, breaking the silence that fell over you. “Telling me your big dark secret.”

His arms around your waist pulled you in even closer, “not as terrifying as I thought.” He said, echoing your words. Words you had uttered the first night you’d ever talked to one another.

“No regrets?”

“No regrets.”

“I missed you,” you said quietly, your lips brushing along his neck as you spoke.

“I missed you too,” he tightened his hold on you.

Clinging to him still, you bathed in his scent. Cinnamon and salt, with a light touch of leather. As you breathed in his scent, an aching need grew in the pit of your stomach. The need to feel his skin against yours. The need to have all of him. It only grew stronger as you felt his warmth underneath you, heat pooling at your core. A shuddering breath past your lips as you tightened your hold on him. You shifted slightly on his lap, seeking for friction. The tension in the room thickened. Slightly pulling away from him, your eyes found his lips, immediately. Lips you were dying to kiss. His left hand found the back of your head, burying his fingers in your hair. Your nose brushed his, your breath fanning over his lips. His tongue darted out to wet them. And without wasting another second, your lips met his. Tentative. Hesitant. A tender question. You pulled away, and his lips chased after you, answering. Meeting yours in a firmer one of his own. His fingers curled in your hair, nails scraping along your scalp.

After weeks of him pulling away, this felt like breathing again. A slight buzz sunk through your flesh down to the very core of your soul. This felt right. This was where you belonged. In his arms.

His fingers clasped the hem of your shirt, pulling it up, momentarily breaking off your kiss, and off of you. It landed somewhere by the window.

“No bra?” He whispered against your lips.

“I was kind of in rush,” you said back, panting.

You pulled his shirt over his head, throwing it behind the couch. His lips crashed against yours. Your chest flushed against his. Skin to skin. A moan escaped your lips when his mouth moved to your neck, down to your collarbone. Hips grinding against his, you felt his rising cock through his sweatpants.

Your hips stuttered against his as wet heat surrounded your nipple, letting out a broken whimper. His hands gripped your hips tighter, moving you along his lap. Your fingers buried into his hair, pulling at it. A groan rumbling through his chest. He pulled his lips away from your nipple. Your lips crashed against his, his hands travelled down your ass and under your thighs. He gripped you as he rose from the couch. You broke off the kiss as he carried you to his bedroom.

Your heartbeat sped up in your chest. Nervous. Your face heated up, especially the top of your ears. Matt lowered you on the bed, his silk sheets making contact with your naked back.

“No need to be nervous, sweetheart,” Matt teased you.

“I can’t help it, I’m sorry,” you sounded breathless.

“Don’t,” he reassured you, a grin plastered on his face. “I like the way you react to me.”

His lips met yours in a searing kiss, before they travelled down your neck, your collarbone down to your navel. His hands made their way to the top of your jeans, slipping the button out. Wet heat kept pooling between your thighs as Matt pulled down your jeans, tugging them the rest of the way when they got stuck at your ankles. He tossed them to the side. And your underwear soon followed.

He hooked one of your legs over his shoulder. A moan left your lips as Matt left opened and wet kisses along the inside of your thigh. The scruff of his beard pleasantly scratching your plush thigh, making his way up to your weeping cunt. Your head fell back between your shoulders at the first swipe of his tongue.

“Shit,” you moaned, hands gripping your breast and squeezing.

Like a starving man, Matt was feasting on you. Lapping up your arousal, greedily. His mouth shifted while his fingers slid inside you. Gasping, you let yourself fall on your back, your hands leaving your breast, reaching, searching for anything else to hold. His fingers curled just a bit, thrusting into you. You clenched around them, legs shaking as you neared the edge.

“Fuck, Matt,” you cried, hands finding his head, gripping his hair.

It had been weeks since you last had been together. Weeks since he had touched you. Tasted you. Maybe that was why you were so overly sensitive to his touch. To his tongue, lapping away, circling around the bundle of nerve. Driving you over the edge.

He pumped his fingers into you faster, his mouth and tongue never stopping their assault. Your climax was within reach, and Matt knew. He could feel it in the way you clenched tightly around his fingers. And before you could ask, he pumped his fingers faster. Unrelenting. Your eyes rolled in the back of your head, clenching around his fingers, falling over the edge. Matt kept pumping and licking, carrying you through your orgasm. Your back arching up as you cried out his name.

Your legs fell apart, your body going slack as you reached the end of it. Matt moved off of the bed, pulling down his sweatpants and boxer. Your body felt like Jello while you desperately tried to catch your breath.

Matt crawled over you, his eyes dark with want, gazing down at you. You cupped his jaw before pulling him down to kiss you. You brought up your legs to cradle his sides, carefully sliding your calf across his lower back to hold him even closer. The taste of you was heavy on his tongue.

His erection laid heavy, trapped between your bodies. You felt it poking at your entrance, pushing against your clit, pulling a moan out of both of you as he rocked his lower half gently against you. You slid your hand between you, and wrapped your hand around his shaft, the head was slick with precum. He throbbed in your hand, Matt groaned, dropping his head down beside yours as you stroked him gently.

“I need you inside me, Matty,” you declared in a shallow breath.  

He pulled back, panting. His pupils were blown out with lust. He shifted slightly, reaching for the bedside table.

“Can—can we go without?” You stopped him. "I'm on birth control and I'm clean—"

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure. If that’s what you want, of course.”

“Yeah,” his lips met yours in a bruising kiss. “Yeah—” another kiss as you resumed your stroking. “—let’s go without.”

You kept your eyes on him, on the way his brows pinched while you kept stroking him. The sight of Matt coming undone at your touch always had a way to turn you on even more. The way he groaned and moaned, the way his brows pinched down, the way his mouth fell open. He had never looked so beautiful than in this moment.

You lined up his length with your entrance. You were so wet that the thick head slipped right in, pleasantly stretching you. He gave a slight roll of his hips and eased in just a bit more, both gasping with relief. You let go of him your hand moving to his lower back, a shy distance away from his ass.

Matt’s lips latched onto yours as he surged forward, burying himself to the hilt, pushing all the air out of your lungs. You broke off the kiss, letting out a gasp, your head falling back on the silk pillow, eyes rolling in the back of your head.

“Shit,” Matt hissed. The slight pressure of your naked walls around his cock was new to him. It felt wonderful. “You feel so good, sweetheart,” his voice sounded thick and hoarse.

You clutched his ass, pressing your nose against his cheek, reveling in the moment. He moved at a slow and steady pace, building up your orgasm.

“Look how well you take me, sweetheart,” his sultry voice made you clenched a little harder around him. “You like the sound of my voice, huh?”

“I like—” you cried as he gave an especially hard thrust. “—I like everything about you, Matty.”

Your legs wrapped around his waist as you pulled him flush against you. His chest, slick with sweat, made contact with yours. His forearms caging you in. He set a faster pace, your fingernails digging into his shoulders. Your toes curling as his cock hit a bit deeper inside of you. Your hips moved against him matching his pace as best as you could. Feeling him without any barrier between you, felt incredible. Heavenly.  

His lips attached to your pulse point, sucking on the skin. You buried your face in his shoulders. Your hips stuttered against his, no longer able to keep up the pace, too lost in your own pleasure. His hips never seemed to tire as they slammed into you. Relentless. His cock pushing against this bundle of nerve that you had never been able to reach on your own. Your legs were shaking around his waist. You could feel yourself falling over, ready to reach your climax.

His rhythm grew uneven, his breathing gone ragged. He moved his hand down to your cunt, his thumb finding your clit and playing with it. Your back moved off of the bed, into him, as electricity jolted through your body at his touch.

“Come for me, sweetheart. Be a good girl and come all over my cock,” he growled.

At his words, you clenched around him, your body milking him, pulling him deeper. Your orgasm knocked the breath out of your lungs. You bit the junction between his neck and shoulder. He dropped his head down on your shoulder, “oh, fuck,” he hissed, hips working in stuttered motions, moaning while he spilt inside of you, his warmth coating your naked walls for the very first time.

“Don’t move,” you whispered to him, holding him tightly as the quaking after-effects kept shaking you.

He shook his head, droplets of sweat flying off in all directions.

“Not going anywhere,” he promised, his forehead resting against your shoulder, his weight comfortably heavy over you.

You both laid like that for a while, catching your breath, still joined. You raked your fingers through his damp hair, brushing them away from his temple. He looked so beautiful. He was. You couldn’t believe your luck that this man was all yours. You felt something warm burst into your chest, this fuzzy feeling, letting you know how you truly felt about him.

You loved him. You were in love with him.

He shifted his head slightly to rest a kiss on your neck. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m okay,” you answered quietly. "You?"

"Perfect."

He shifted to his side, pulling out of you slowly. You loved him, you had known that for a while. But those words weren’t the kind you spilled after you just had mind-blowing sex with your boyfriend. He pulled you into his embrace, tight against his chest. His forehead touched yours, his hand cupping the side of your face, brushing hair away from your temple. His eyes, although unseeing, were soft and and full of warmth, a fondness had settled within them.

Did he love you back? And if you were to say the words now, would he say them back? Maybe he wasn’t quite ready yet. Maybe you weren’t ready. After all, God had a strange sense of humor when it came to you—and the people you loved.

“Hey, what’s gotten you so nervous?”

You frowned, shaking your head, “I’m not nervous.”

“Your heart’s beating pretty fast,” he retorted.

“Oh,” you let out a low laugh. “Almost forgot you could do that.” You let out a deep exhale. “It’s nothing, really.” Your hand went up his back as you brushed your nose against his, “we can talk about it at a later time.”

His lips pressed against yours, “promise?”

“Promise.”

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[magicalgirlmindcrank]

Mindcrank's top 10 Mikus of the first five years

This list runs from the last monday of feb 2019 to to feb '24. Theres a few more done after that date in 24 that are not eligible.

#10 - 7/29/19: 'Aeiou Aeiou'

This was the first Miku we ever made that we were and remain truly proud of. We were still using SAI 1.0 back then, and I don't think we ever figured out how to do any rendering outside of adjusting opacity on the default brush. That we managed to make such a blend of colors and light with such a limitation in knowledge and tools just months after picking up a tablet, really makes this piece impressive to us even now. Even so, this barely cinches a spot almost by power of nostalgia alone.

#9 - 5/30/2022: 'One day I'll get to actually attend a concert'

Funnily enough, this one is based on a concert we did go to. Not a Hatsune Miku concert (though we still have our Miku expo 2020 ticket) but an Aurora one our youngest sister took us to. The singer came on, backlit as seen, and it kinda stuck with me. Really love this one though, the minimalist backlighting just looks great.

#8 - 6/27/2022: I really liked that one AI Greentext @liquidstar posted

While there are parts of this we're a bit questionable on now, namely the face in the final panel and being inspired by an AI greentext in the first place, this Miku holds a v special place in our heart. it's easily our most popular too, notes wise!

#7 - 4/3/2023 'A Trip To The Moon by Hatsune Miku'

This was part inspired by the desire to make a fake album cover, and part by the urban legend that the first manmade object in space was a sewer cover that was launched by a nuclear test. While untrue as the lid would have disintegrated at the speed it was moving well before leaving the atmosphere, it made for some potent imagery. This is one we wish we had even more time with, but as is, just looks fantastic. Every concept we wanted is there and so so good. Should really make a song list for this album.

#6 3/6/2023 'This is how Hatslimey Migoo arrives onstage'

This was part of Migoo March of '23, and we had to fight ourselves from including another piece from from the same month. It's no secret that Hatslimey Migoo is our favorite Miku design we made (sorry Radical Miku) and the whimsy and charm she brings with her is in spades here.

#5 - 7/11/2022 'Miku but it's me my 2009 senior year'

Okay so obviously at this point they're all near and dear to my heart, but this one has something even more special to it. I was such a depressed piece of shit in highschool and it was nice to give our past selves some love. That so many also loved her was genuinely healing in a way.

#4 - 8/1/2022 'Sli-Miku? Slimeku? Hatslimey Miku? Yeah'

Listen we said Hastlimey Migoo was our favorite child, and well, we just couldn't not put her origin image on this list. I mean just look at her! She's adorable! Not to mention how well we did making her look goopy as hell.

Honorable mentions!

(okay look we had to cut this down from 26 images and there still like a dozen more that could have made the shortlist so let us have this)

From 2021! Still perhaps our favorite Radical Miku! Posing and shadows look great still tbh.

Perhaps the Miku with the least amount of love noteswise. From 2023, it just really captures the miserable summer days in my shitty old room. there was no AC and it was triple digits or close to it many, many days. Just looking at it is something bittersweet.

From 2022, we have this vampire miku! Sure some parts are a little off, but the colors and bg just feel so right! So very perfectly part of the mood. Back to the countdown!

#3 9/25/2023 'Patron Saint of Song'

This is the Miku we're perhaps the second most unreasonably proud of on a technical level. Working within the limitations of imitating another style just pulled something out of us ig. We're not even sure what else to say, just look at it! The smooth lines, the way the flatly colored pieces create depth with the curves, the bordering. Easily one of the best pieces we've ever made.

#2 - 2/8/21 'Miku Devours Her Progeny'

This is it. Perhaps the one you expected at No. 1? It has been our favorite for a very long time, and the one we pointed to as such for a while after all. Even after making the piece that now resides at the top slot.

There's just something so absurd about Miku as Saturn, yet something that works to it. She is, after all, the first Vocaloid, and remains the most outwardly popular. A position that naturally calls for the cannibalization of her progeny. Perhaps it's the way it captures the madness and zero sum nature of making art?

No matter how long we look at it, no matter the new flaws we spot in it's construction, it's a piece that as we gaze upon it we only love more.

#1 - 5/22/23 'Trail Cam Footage'

This is a piece that's truly difficult to speak on. Iirc, we had found ourselves short on time, so elected to try a rougher, more impressionist style. Something we could make quickly, as to not miss a Monday and get to bed at a reasonable hour. Taking further inspiration from trail cams and horror, we decided a greyscale would help further eliminate work. No pesky color picking to complicate rendering.

This as made in a single post-work sitting as a result. It has since become our favorite.

It so perfectly captures the feeling of seeing something spooky on a low res camera feed. Just enough details to let your mind fill in the blanks. The short field of view making it all the more intimate. The oppressive darkness all around. This is the only piece we've loved enough to share to other sites we don't post to. Its both our blog background, and our PC wallpaper!

We've often considered revisiting this style, but are afraid we'd never be able to live up to this. Honestly, it feels like it would be redundant. This one piece is already the peak. Not to mention, there's no way to live up to the fact that just days later, actual trail cam footage of two naked witches eating a deer emerged.

Which Miku is your favorite? Did we miss one you love? Let us know!