#adorable assbutt

[bisexual-winchester]

Okay we're all talking about how unhinged it is for Jensen to throw Dean a bday party and to alive dean in his fanfic. BUT THE MESSAGE WAS LOUD AND CLEAR WHEN HE WAS PUTTING REFERENCES INTO HIS OTHER SHOWS

The man wore Dean's boots for The Boys. Gave salt for protection on Big Sky.

Jensen bby, deangirly, never change.

[warpedwings]

Misha Collins • Cowboy 🤠

[babygirlwolverine]

destiel checkmarks for the sweetest person on this hellsite (affectionate)... hope you don't mind me gifting you these ❤️ not really special but every heller needs the blue/green checkmarks :D happy birthday!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Theresa!!!!!!!!!!! THERESA!!!!!!!! this is so so so cute and so sweet I actually genuinely burst into tears when you sent this gift like I am so shocked and so speechless right now!!! I was not expecting anyone to gift me anything like this oh god!! thank you so so much for the destiel checkmarks!! for the sweetest person on this hellsite (affectionate)?????? I am WEEPING!!!! YOU are the sweetest person and I utterly and completely adore you and love you!!! you hope I don’t mind??? don’t mind?? 🥹🥹 i have never been happier oh my god this is genuinely the sweetest and most thoughtful thing ever!! I was not expecting this at all and seeing the lil gift box pop up on my dash on my actual birthday left me completely breathless!! I love you!! ❤️🫶🏻❤️🫶🏻❤️🫶🏻❤️🫶🏻

literally it was like you were cas giving me a birthday gift!! this was so so so special, I literally cannot thank you enough for gifting me destiel checkmarks!! thank you thank you thank you from the bottom of my heart!!! best birthday ever 💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚

[imbiowaresbitch]

A is for Assbutt ch 5 - E is for Emma

Much to Emma’s disappointment, when Sunday rolled around, she hadn't slept well the night before, so she was tired and cranky. She still wanted to go on a playdate with Jack and his big cousin Claire – apparently, dads were superfluous – but Dean put his foot down. With Emma in her room, crying and throwing her stuffies at the door, Dean pulled out his phone to text Cas, already exhausted.

Dean: hey Sunshine. Emma’s having a very bad morning. Think she overdid it yesterday refusing to have a nap. It's just not a good plan to take her out. I don't want her to feel worse.

Dean heard the heavy thump of something more substantial hitting Emma’s door and sighed, rubbing at his eyes. He knew she’d be upset even before he told her they couldn't see Jack, and Dean was just glad he hadn't mentioned the butterfly conservatory to her. Still, throwing stuffies was one thing. Other things could be broken, and that wasn't okay.

He knocked on her door, being a stickler for giving her privacy, then opened the door a crack. He found her sitting on her bed, her arms crossed as she glared at him, an adorable pout on her tear-streaked face. As he pushed the door a little wider, it bumped against something more solid than a plush toy, and he glanced down. Her tiny black shoes – Charlie called them Mary Janes – sat behind the door, and further inspection revealed a black streak on the door from the soles. 

“Hey, sweetpea,” Dean said softly, picking up her shoes and tucking them back into her closet. He picked up a couple of her stuffies and set them back on her bed, then dropped to a crouch in front of her. “I know you're mad at me, Emma, but no wrecking your things. Your stuffies can't break, but you could knock over one of your music boxes and break it.”

Fresh tears welled in her eyes, and she stared at him, her lip quivering. Lydia had given her the music boxes she had, and he knew the idea of something happening to them would be scary. Her tears spilled over, and she let out a wail. Dean felt a pang of guilt. Maybe he should have mentioned the Star Wars lamp from Charlie and Stevie instead, but too late now.

He held out his arms, and she fell into them, hiccoughing as she burrowed against his chest.

“I miss Jack,” she said through her tears. “I wanna play with him an’ his cousin, Claire!”

“I know, baby girl, but you're still sick, so I think we need to stay home today and give you some more rest. I'll talk to Jack’s daddy and see about next weekend, okay?” he offered, and she pulled back, her face set in a frown.

“I wanna play today!” she half-shrieked, and Dean saw her wince, her frown deepening. 

“Is your head hurting again?” he asked gently, and she nodded petulantly. He set her on her bed and reached for the box of tissues, helping her wipe her eyes and nose, then bent and kissed her hair softly. “I'm going to get you some medicine, okay?”

“No! I don't want it! I don't like med’cine! I don't like you!” she shouted, throwing herself down on her pillow, hiding her face as she sobbed.

Dean felt a pit open in his stomach, and he swallowed roughly. He gently patted her shoulder, ignoring the way his heart ached, and went to the hall to get the Tylenol from the closet. He measured out the dose and went back to Emma's room. She was curled in a ball with her back to the door, her arms around her octopus stuffy in a stranglehold. Her tiger was sitting on her pillow, clearly placed to stand guard.

~~

read the rest on AO3 or read from the beginning here.

Thanks to @nickelkeep for the beta! 😘

[casdeans-pie]

How Does Pinterest See Me?

Thanks for tagging me @archervale !! I adore tag games ♡

Rules: Search up fashion, pantone, mood, food, and then save the first picture that comes up.

Ohhh these came out real nice!! The only one I'm not so keen on is the pantone colour

I would absolutely wear that sweater

I want a waffle

No pressure tagging: @phantommermaidqueen @thepagemistress @dreampencil @king4aday @dean-you-assbutt-cas-loves-you @whatlieswithinthefog @deancrowleycas

[nickelkeep]

I was tagged by @hollyspn

I'll tag @imbiowaresbitch, @cr-noble-writes, @bleuzombie, @hunterinakilt, and @dean-you-assbutt-cas-loves-you for a nice odd five

Do you make your bed?

Sort of? The pillows don't really move, and the blanket gets thrown in place.

What’s your favourite number?

First, the joke number. 77 If you get why, I'll write you a ficlet. (First person with the correct answer) But my actual, honest-to-the-ground favorite number? 13.

What is your job?

Because I'm disabled, I'm a SAHP. But I flip things for extra money on the side, as well as some freelance copy editing and commissions.

If you could go back to school, would you?

I actually did for a little bit. But I got royally fucked over because of being disabled. I like taking free online classes every now and then.

Can you parallel park?

Yup.

A job you had that would surprise people?

I don't think any of the jobs I held would surprise anyone. I think it's when I started working that surprises most people because my grandmother used me as child labor when I was like 4.

Do you think aliens are real?

Absolutely.

Can you drive a manual car?

Yes. It's how I learned to drive.

What's your guilty pleasure?

I don't like the term guilty pleasure. If it's something that brings you joy, why should you feel guilty about it? Unless it's something that you should be you know, put into therapy or jail for. But something innocent like Dean Winchester loving Taylor Swift? Come on. That's not a guilty pleasure. Enjoy it. Yolo. Oh, but what's my guilty pleasure? According to my sister, it's Bailey Sarian. I don't feel guilty listening to her though.

Tattoos?

A lot. I think it's 20? And I'm getting a couple more for my birthday here in a couple weeks.

Favourite colour?

Orange!

Favourite type of music?

Alt Rock and Alt Folk. My favorite band is Sleeping Wolf. According to Spotify, they're 'pop rock', which I politely disagree with. I also love what we called back in the day nu-metal, so Slipknot, Korn, Breaking Benjamin, etc.

Do you like puzzles?

Yes.

Any phobias?

Clowns, to an extent. Like, I'm not afraid of the clowns that are meant to be scary. I fucking love those. But the normal everyday clowns? They actually make me really fucking nervous. I also have a little bit of a fear of heights. But it's more like when I'm on a ladder because I know what a fucking klutz I am.

Favourite childhood sport?

Lacrosse. I was hoping to go to college on a Lacrosse scholarship.

Do you talk to yourself?

All the time. I'm actually talking to myself while filling this out.

What movies do you adore?

The Princess Bride is my all-time favorite movie. Nothing will dethrone that. Ever. Howl's Moving Castle? Second favorite movie. Nothing has dethroned that. 3-5 usually rotate between Gone in 60 Seconds, Zack and Miri Make a Porno, and The Fifth Element. I am also a huge horror movie aficionado. I will talk about horror movies for DAYS.

Coffee or tea?

Iced Coffee.

First thing you wanted to be growing up?

A teacher.

[sailorsally]

8 shows to get to know me

thanks for the tag @dwcas 😊💙

Black Sails (this was my whole personality before SPN)

Miranda (my comfort show)

Pushing Daisies (just love everything about this. Really one of the most special and creative shows out there)

Derry Girls (I'm fond of the Irish & this show is hillarious)

Halt & Catch Fire (One of the best written shows I have ever seen. Incredible character studies)

The X Files (well, this is just big ol nostalgia because I grew up on this show but it still holds up! And it's gorgeously shot)

Ted Lasso (watched this last year on a whim & adored it)

Grace & Frankie (granted first couple of seasons were way better than what came after but I still love this show a lot)

& Supernatural obv.

Also, honorbale mentions to Doctor Who (good) and Sherlock (bad). I haven't seen these shows in a decade but they were very formative for me.

Tagging some people that might wanna participate!

@vegancas @twofrontteethstillcrooked @hephaestn @blanketforcas @hettolandija @dean-you-assbutt-cas-loves-you @deancrowleycas @callalilycas @trampledundercas @jactingjoices @desitel

[zofmoesia]

Assbutts

I want everyone to know I have 38 of these in my inbox from my dear adoring, loving, wife.

[waitingforwinterwinds]

A Storm of Swords: Steel and Snow - 00 PROLOGUE (Pages 01-17)

Displeased with their situation, some of the Brothers of the Night's Watch plot desertion and mutiny, but their plans are disrupted when the snows arrive, and with them, something Other in the dark of night.

-

... Do not care for this Chett fellow, I remember he was rather unpleasant back in one of Jon's chapters. He struck me as a bit entitled but not nearly as clever as he thought himself to be. A "you said 'bare minimum requirement' so that's what I did, the full 'bare minimum requirement.'" type

"Mormont will be dead before daybreak, remember? Who cares what he likes?" Small Paul blinked his black little eyes. Maybe he had forgotten, Chett thought; he was stupid enough to forget most anything. "Why do we have to kill the Old Bear? Why don't we just go off and let him be?"

Ah. Damn. We've reached the mutiny already. Well, at least I have the consolation that Chett seems to be the prologue POV, and thus far we're 2-for-2 in the prologue POV characters biting the big one.

...now that I've said it he's not going to die, is he? :(

"- and Ser Piggy for the ravens. -"

... !!!! STAY AWAY FROM SAM YOU ASSBUTTS!! Also don't call him that, you fatphobic piece of trash.

Gosh, but they are just DTM (Down To Massacre) their own brothers and colleagues. They clearly skipped the lunch line the day they handed out the character-growth kits.

... So the Watch can see the wildlings and all their equipment, but there's still that disconnect for them, they haven't quiet realised that this isn't an invasion, it's an evacuation.

(Also I have a strong desire to know about their agricultural practices, if they have them, what exactly are the free folk's dietary trends? How much snow is there on the ground north of the Wall? Do they get any kind of summer-like weather? are there any crop plants (other than pine trees) or is it all meats and meat products?)

Just as an aside, every time I see Thoren Smallwood's name, my brain skips over to the Hobbit fandom, and I think "insufficiently Majestic and lacking in Swagger, you do not deserve the name Thoren, you are no Oakenshield."

Chett is now found guilty of murdering a girl who didn't want to have sex with him, plotting mutiny, being an asshat in general, and animal abuse.

*smacks him with the steel chair into a crevasse* sit with yourself and reflect. or perish. actually, maybe perish anyway?

"We'll never find that one, and I'll be blamed," announced Edd Tollett, the dour grey-haired squire everyone called Dolorous Edd. "Nothing ever goes missing that they don't look at me, ever since I lost my horse. As if that could be helped. He was white and it was snowing, what did they expect?"

HA! oh Edd, I adore you. wait... Edd has a last name? huh. cool beans.

Aww, Grenn being supportive of Sam's efforts. That's good friending Grenn. Keep going Sam, you're doing great! (Archery is hard, and it requires far more arm strength and stability than people think. And that's just assuming you're using the correct draw hand for your eye. I myself am left eye dominant, which means I need to draw the string with my left arm... or I used to, before my shoulder got a little messed up. It's mostly fine, just a little chronic pressure build up that makes it very hard to do archery now.)

YES! Sam hit the target!!!! YAY!!!! 🎉

...Stop ruining the moment, Chett!

"You hit a tree," Chett said. "Let's see how you shoot when it's Mance rayder's lads. They won't stand there with their arms out and their leaves rustling, oh no. They'll come right at you, screaming in your face, and i bet you'll piss those breeches. One o' them will plant his axe right between those little pig eyes. The last thing you'll hear will be the thunk it makes when it bites into your skull." The fat boy was shaking. Dolorous Edd put a hand on his shoulder. "Brother," he said solemnly, "just because it happened that way for you doesn't mean Samwell will suffer the same." "What are you talking about Tollett?" "The axe that split your skull. Is it true that half your wits leaked out on the ground and your dogs ate them?"

eheheh. Have I mentioned I adore Edd? (also, ngl, for the first bit, I thought Edd was accusing Chett of pissing himself the first time he faced true combat.)

Dywen clacked his wooden teeth. "No wolves neither. There was before, but no more. Where'd they go, you figure?" "Someplace warm," said Chett.

*squints* I have the strangest sense Jon Snow in the show said basically that same line. "Where will you go?" / "Somewhere warm." It's only tangentially funny because he also is a wolf.

... It's kind of fascinating, how Chett and his ilk cast Sam so readily as the craven, which to be fair, even Sam casts himself that way, but then we look at what's happening here, with Chett and the desertion crew, and they themselves are committing a craven act.

Like yes, we all know the Night's Watch is technically like 90+% a militarized penal colony at this point and not a volunteer monk army, and it is understandable to want to run away from that when your own heinous actions gave you two choices "die now or live in isolation on the frostiest of walls" only to discover the second option was actually just "die later while cold," but desertion and mutiny in the face of uncomfy conditions and war is an act that Chett would absolutely call craven, if he weren't the one doing it.

Snow caked his beard all around his mouth. Where did that come from, with Bessa?

.... ohhh... Chett's mental train is running kinda sluggish... brain lag in the clod snow, now where have we heard that before? *squints in Suss AF*

NO! Stay away from Sam!

Yes! Good job who ever blew the horn! Exc-elent... tiiiming oh no. horn means stuff.

"Three," he squeaked to Chett, "that was three, I heard three. They never blow three. Not for hundred and thousands of years. Three means-" "-Others." Chett made a sound that was half a laugh and half a sob, and suddenly his small clothes were wet, and he could feel piss running down his leg, see steam rising off the front of his breeches.

well. shit. that's not good.

neither is Chett surviving the prologue. :( but hey, at least his accusations of Sam wetting himself in fear came back to bite him in the ass. or, well, frostbite in the somewhere when the pee gets cold.

It's been so long since I've seen the relevant part of the show, I feel like this timeline is different from the show? I'm pretty sure the mutiny happened before the Others got near the remaining members of the Watch, but also i feel like the group was smaller and the party split? Meh, I'll rewatch it at some point, probably.

[weirdo09]

jealousy

a wheelclair fic(see what i did with the title^)

since lucas’ gotten popular with the ladies, mike’s jealousy has been growing bit by bit. when they were hang out one day, mike was contemplating on whether or not to ask lucas about his fan club. “hey, lucas?” mike said in a small voice, cuddling close to lucas. “yea, babe?” lucas asked, noticing mike’s tone. “do you maybe like those bitches some people call fans?” mike said while looking in lucas’ eyes for a sign. lucas busted out laughing and wrapped his arms tightly around mike. “oh, baby, no i don’t like them, what made you think i did?” lucas chuckled but stopped once he saw mike’s pout. “cariño, i’m serious I really don’t like them like that.” lucas said while cupping mike’s face. mike still had a pout on his face so lucas decided to kiss his pout away.

he kissed mike’s cheeks, then his freckles and finally his lips. mike chuckled the whole time and soon his pout went away. “were you jealous?” lucas said smugly, mike started to blush red. “what? no, of course not, why would you think that??” mike said crossing his arms while huffing. “sure” lucas said slurring the e a bit further. mike rolled his eyes and begin to get off of lucas’ lap. lucas pulls mike back into his lap. “lo siento, mi amor you’re just so cute when you’re jealous!” lucas said pecking at mike’s cheeks. “i’m not cute!” mike said, rolling his eyes again. “ah, pero, mi amor eres el más lindo de todos…” lucas whispers in mike’s ear, mike starts to blush even harder now. “now, stop sulking!” lucas said as he began to tickle mike. “OK OK LUCAS STOPAHAH-!” mike scrunched his face and yelled, laughing. “not until you said it!” lucas said, chuckling. “OK OK I’M JEALOUS!” mike said and lucas stopped tickling him. “so you admit it?” lucas says with the most mischievous grin. mike rolled his eyes for the fourth time and slowly nodded.

“oh, alrigh’ i’ll stop teasin ya~” lucas said in a singsong tone. mike remained silent though secretly he was cussing lucas out in his mind affectionately. “c’mon don’t give me that look.” lucas pleaded, wrapping his arms around mike hoping for him to stop.(mike’s face looked something like that scene at the byers’ dining table, the picture will be provided at the end of the fic)(the look gets kinda scary after a while- lucas)

mike started to giggle softly “you’re such an adorable idiot…” mike teased, lucas smirked. “just so you know, i’m your idiot!” lucas exclaimed, pecking mike’s cheek and then softly going for mike’s lips. mike smiled into the kiss, placing a hand on lucas cheek. they broke apart, staring into each other’s eyes. mike put his head into lucas’ lap and lucas began brush his hair with his fingers. mike softly purred(this bitch’s a cat, ya hear me? /aff) lucas smiled and thought ‘aww, he’s so cute.’ mike soon fell asleep thanks to the head rubs and lucas was the last awake, admiring the sight in front of him.(it’s giving cat 🐈‍⬛)

translations (sorry i’m a sucker for afro latino lucas)

lo siento, mi amor- i’m sorry, my love

pero mi amor, eres el más lindo de todos- but, my love you are the cutest of them all(masculine)

cariño- darling, honey, sweetie, dear etc

correct me if i’m wrong, i’m not too fluent in spanish atm 😅

this was the look mike gave lucas^

@verashalurks @adorewillbyers @byleriscannonparty @geolikesstrangerthings @pleaseh00kupme @forever-augustine @xhavibee @willbyerswithagun @assbutt-casbutt-iii @pimplepogue

[bisexual-winchester]

Same

[he-is-lightning-in-a-bottle]

CURRENT ASK GAME

Tagged by @waitmyturtles and feeling a bit bored, so I'm giving this a shot! ENTERTAIN Me, TUMBLR.

Current time: 11:43 am

Current activity: Drinking unsweet iced tea, waiting in my car.

Currently thinking about: Dinner tonight. My kids make my parents and I dinner once a week, and tonight's menu is Lebanese food.

Current favorite song: My current favorites are always the things I am listening to RIGHT THIS MINUTE because that's how my brain works. Right now that's What I Want to Say by Acourve. Listen to it!

Currently reading: The Hanging City by Charlie Holmberg. It's a troll romance! I'm not kidding.

Currently watching: My Lovely Liar (Viki) , The Golden Spoon (Hulu), Reborn Rich (Hulu), Fake it Till You Make It (Viki), Dangerous Romance (youtube), Hidden Agenda (youtube), Kiseki: Dear to Me (Viki), Star Trek Strange New Worlds (Paramount+), Jun & Jun (Viki), Why R U Korea (iqiyi), Stay by my Side (Viki), Love Class 2 (Viki), My Personal Weatherman (Viki), King the Land (Netflix), Laws of Attraction (iqiyi), Only Friends (youtube), Love in Translation (iqiyi).

Current favorite character: until someone better comes along, it's gotta be Nozue from Old Fashion Cupcake. I adore his character journey from lonely and repressed middle-aged office drone living a routine and predictable life to a joyful, well-adjusted man who snagged a much younger lover and tries new things. And he did it all without radical life changes like quitting his job and backpacking across Europe or enduring a dramatic hardship. He just looked where he was standing in his very mundane life and... stepped left. Inspiring!

Current WIP: none

Tagging @asexual-fandom-queen, @piningbisexuals, @absolutebl, @spicyvampire, @janblue, @dean-you-assbutt-cas-loves-you, @thequeenofsastiel, @tiggymalvern and anyone else reading this who wants to play!

[bearsbeetsbeskar]

I adore your blog! 💕

Also love that your question thingy is named „assbutt“ 🤣

thank you Mel!!! I'm glad you like my content :)

and OMG when I tell you I had returned to this blog after a good 10 years and I was previously in the supernatural fandom, and the askbox was the ONE THING I DID NOT EDIT AFTER JOINING THE MANDO/PEDRO FANDOM LMAO. I might just keep it that way hehe

[supernatural-blogss]

1st Official Blog!! (not another intro post, I promise)

Hello all and welcome to my first official post!

For these blogs I was wondering what order I should write them in— preference or chronological. If you have any opinions on the matter, please feel free to say so in the comments! :)

As for now, I figured tackling these blogs chronologically would be the most organized option, so without further ado, here are my opinions on season one of Supernatural!

Season 1 Opinions

Personally, I love season one. It has the charm that season 1-5 has while also being completely individualistic. Of course, this individuality can be chalked up to the fact the show runners were trying to decide whether they would continue to air on an episode by episode basis.

Despite it all, this season achieved a wonderful feat, as it would attracted thousands of viewers who would anxiously wait for the release of season two.

As a result, a very interesting take on a monster-hunter show was created. Nothing like Scooby-Doo, no, because all the monster research led to real monsters. Ghosts, Wendigos, Demons, and Shtigras are among the list of monsters Sam and Dean faced during their season one adventures.

The show also created an interesting plot-schema; each episode focusing on a specific monster hunt while all eventually tying into the overarching plot of our favorite boys finding their missing father. This kept the show fresh and fun to watch, and gave the show-writers the chance to introduce a new, fleshed out monster every episode, which helped greatly expand the fresh lore that was the Supernatural show.

What I love most about this season, however, is how it cements the brotherly relationship between Sam and Dean. These two cannot spend a moment without bickering, making fun of, or trying to prank one another. It’s clear to see just from season one that this will be a tale of two brothers that obviously hold a deep brotherly bond. I’m a sucker for a family, and family is something this show does right when it comes to Sam and Dean. While not shying away from their shared childhood traumas and grievances tied to their absent father figure, the show makes it clear that Sam and Dean have a bond that would be hard to find in anyone else except for each other, as they both have the shared experience of being raised monster-hunters.

All in all, I adore season one! I find myself rewatching the pilot on repeat just to see Dean and Sam tackle “the lady in white” ghost. It’s unique and it’s a season I believe can hook even the most assuming of viewer!

My Favorite Character for season 1 is (drumroll please)…

Dean Winchester !!!!!

From the very first episode, this man had me hooked. From his snarky attitude to his constantly flirty retorts, there was something about him in season one that has had me hooked from the ages of 14 to 21. He’s funny, he’s witty, and he’s got an insanely nice leather jacket. It was my first, and maybe my only time, finding a deep love for the playboy-archetype character.

In season one he rugged, and it’s clear he uses humor when a majority of people wouldn’t. He’s a lighthearted contrast to his worrying younger brother, while also consistently being a big brother figure— it’s a big feat!

Other than that, young Jensen Ackles is an absolutely gorgeous man. Just look at those eyes!

My favorite scene:

This scene depicts the first of Dean’s many encounters with law enforcement.

and that concludes my first blog!

I hope you enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing this! I love talking about Supernatural and will take any and all opportunities to speak on the show. If you’ve watched the show yourself, let me know if you agree with my opinions on season one in the comments! I would also love to hear who your favorite characters are!! :)

Well, until next week! Later, assbutts!

[ao3feed-destiel-02]

My eldritch horror you still make me quiver

My eldritch horror, you still make me quiver https://ift.tt/NmqzpvS by FreyaBlackthorn “Cas, you’re cute when you’re angry.” „Well, then, I’m about to get adorable, you assbutt.”   Or where Cas tries his damnedest to be intimidating but Dean knows better. Words: 1874, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: M/M Characters: Castiel (Supernatural), Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester Additional Tags: Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Silly, Eldritch being tries to be intimidating to boyfriend, Boyfriend finds it cute, Boyfriend is an asshole, Sam is the poor witness, I am batshit insane about the dynamic bw angel!Cas and Dean, no beta we die like the winchesters via AO3 works tagged 'Castiel/Dean Winchester' https://ift.tt/dcLoBjh April 03, 2024 at 11:47AM

[kingblueyellowbird]

Get Thee Behind Me, Assbutts (Traducción)

Capítulo 3: Digital

Historia de @ladyknightskye

<- Anteriorㅤ| Ao3 spa | Ao3 eng | Masterlist |ㅤSiguiente ->

Jo se escabulló escaleras abajo, necesitaba alejarse del segundo piso de la casa de Bobby, no quería escuchar los sonidos procedentes del dormitorio principal. Una cosa era saber conceptualmente que su madre y Bobby se acostaban juntos, pero ¿tener las pruebas delante de ella?

No, gracias.

Ella preferiría-

Todos los pensamientos se detuvieron cuando llegó a la sala de estar/estudio de Bobby. La chimenea se había reducido a cenizas, pero aún había suficiente luz de la luna para iluminar la escena que se mostraba ante ella. Sam y Dean habían hecho sus camas en el suelo delante del sofá, supuestamente, para que los tres ángeles hermanos pudieran hacer, algo, con el sofá. Jo no estaba completamente segura de la lógica allí, pero cuando se fue a la cama, Lucifer, Gabriel y Castiel estaban sentados en el sofá, compartiendo una botella de Jack Daniel's mientras observaban a Sam y Dean luchando con las mantas.

Ahora, sin embargo, el sofá estaba vacío. En su lugar, los cinco hombres estaban en el suelo. Durante unos largos segundos, el cerebro de Jo no pudo asimilar ni procesar lo que estaba viendo. Mucho de aquello era extrañamente correcto, y a la vez extrañamente incorrecto.

Lo primero que comprendió con una cierta coherencia fue que Dean estaba acurrucando. Había envuelto sus brazos alrededor de Castiel, atrayendo al ángel para que pudiera acurrucarse en el hueco donde el cuello se unía con el hombro. Debería haber sido incómodo para ambos, pero en algún momento Cas se había quitado la gabardina y la chaqueta. Seguía con la camisa de vestir blanca, pero parecía casi desnudo sin sus capas habituales. Jo se sorprendió al verlo con los ojos cerrados. Ella pensó que los ángeles no necesitaban dormir.

Y tal vez así fue como su cerebro finalmente pudo asimilar el resto de la escena. Castiel estaba en el exterior del montón de hombres, mientras que la espalda de Dean estaba en el interior de la pila en el suelo. Sam yacía de espaldas a Dean, pero su cuerpo estaba inclinado de tal manera que estaba más o menos acostado encima de Lucifer con uno de sus brazos enredado alrededor de uno de los arcángeles y el otro alrededor de su cuello. Lucifer estaba de espaldas, con los brazos abiertos para que no solo rodearan a Gabriel y Sam, sino que incluso tenía una mano alrededor del cuello de Castiel. Gabriel también estaba medio recostado sobre su hermano, una mano enredada con la de Lucifer, la otra enterrada en el cabello de Sam.

Jo no supo cuánto tiempo estuvo allí de pie, con las manos sobre la boca, encorvada y las rodillas hacia dentro, pero casi no pudo contener los ruidos que quería hacer. La escena era tan deliciosamente adorable e incorrecta al mismo tiempo. Tenía que hacer una foto.

Afortunadamente, su bolso seguía en la cocina. Utilizando todo su sigilo de cazadora, sacó su cámara digital y la encendió. Sabía que sólo tendría una oportunidad, ya que el flash despertaría al menos a algunos de ellos, pero estaba dispuesta a enfrentarse a la ira de los ángeles con tal de conseguir una foto de Sam y Dean Winchester siendo absolutamente adorables. Dean tenía la boca abierta y estaba babeando el cuello de Cas, ¡por el amor de Dios!

Una vez que estuvo a sus pies, levantó la cámara y busco el mejor ángulo para hacer la foto que quería. Los botones de función de la cámara ya estaban silenciados, pero sabía que el obturador seguiría haciendo clic. Sin embargo, Jo sabía que era el flash lo que la delataría. Solo esperaba que Gabriel y Lucifer no se enfadaran demasiado y pudieran convencer a Castiel de que no le quitara la cámara.

Los conocía desde hacía seis horas, pero supuso que los hermanos arcángeles eran lo bastante idiotas como para que esto les pareciera tan gracioso como a ella.

Con una plegaria silenciosa a un Dios que sabía que no la escuchaba, Jo pulsó el botón. El flash se disparó, el obturador hizo clic y...

Nada.

Ninguno se movió.

Jo parpadeó, sin saber por qué. ¿Se trataba de algún tipo de truco?

Miró la pantalla de la cámara e hizo clic en la opción de galería para poder ver la foto. Había resultado genial, aunque los chicos estaban un poco sobreexpuestos por el flash. Había hecho una foto perfecta de lo que tenía delante.

Cuando Jo volvió a mirar hacia arriba, se encontró con un par de ojos azules helados. Lucifer la miró fijamente. Ella se encogió un poco, pero sonrió. 

—Hola —dijo suavemente—. No pude resistirme. Ustedes se veían tan lindos. 

—¿Puedo? —preguntó en voz baja.

Ella se arrastró hasta su cabeza y se arrodilló a su lado. Le mostró la foto y él asintió. 

—Es… Tienes una manera de copiar esto en papel, ¿verdad?

—Oh, sí.

—¿Podrías hacerme una?

Jo parpadeó rápidamente, pero asintió. 

—¡Por supuesto! Incluso puedo ver si el sitio de fotos que uso puede hacer copias más pequeñas. Ya sabes, ¿para una cartera?

—Me gustaría eso —dijo Lucifer. Echó la cabeza hacia atrás y cerró los ojos—. Buenas noches, Joanna.

Más tarde, mucho más tarde, Jo se preguntaría qué la había llevado a hacerlo. ¿Habría sido el alcohol que aún le nublaba el cerebro? ¿Fue el peligro y la emoción de saber lo que estaba haciendo? ¿O fue la parte de ella que era Ellen Harvelle y reconoció las posibilidades de Lucifer Morningstar incluso antes que él? Fuera cual fuese el motivo, se inclinó y lo besó en la frente.  

—Buenas noches, Lucifer.

Corrió escaleras arriba, llevándose su cámara con ella. Ni siquiera los sonidos que aún provenían del dormitorio principal podían penetrar los pensamientos que giraban en su cráneo.

Cuando Jo bajó las escaleras esa mañana, encontró a todos los chicos ya levantados. Apretó su cámara digital contra el pecho mientras se dirigía a Sam y Dean. 

—¡Buenos días, chicos! 

Dean gruñó, pero Sam sonrió. 

—Buenos días Jo.

—¿Cómo has dormido?

La expresión de Dean, de por sí extraña, se tornó aún más contemplativa. Sam parecía haberse tragado un pez dorado vivo. 

—Bien. Estuvo... bien.

Gabriel y Lucifer reían desde donde estaban apoyados en la encimera de la cocina, tomando café. Gabriel no dejaba de añadir más y más azúcar a su taza, mientras Lucifer tarareaba cada vez que tomaba un pequeño sorbo de la suya.

—¡Bien! —dijo, levantando su cámara—. Parecía que estabas muy cómodo. 

El rostro de Sam palideció. 

—Jo, por favor dime que no tomaste una foto.

Jo sólo le sonrió.

Sam se abalanzó sobre la cámara justo cuando Bobby y Ellen finalmente hacían su aparición. Jo apenas se dio cuenta, riéndose demasiado por el pánico en el rostro de Sam. 

—¡Vamos, Sammy! —ella gritó— ¡Es una gran foto!

—¡Dale Jo!

Puede que Jo no haya crecido con hermanos, pero reconoció la desesperación pura en la cara de Sam. El absolutamente tomaría su cámara y borraría esa foto si ella no se alejara de él. De acuerdo, ella ya había hecho una copia de seguridad en su computadora portátil, pero él no lo sabía y ella no iba a decírselo. Con los instintos de cazadora a flor de piel, se dirigió hacia las personas más seguras de la sala.

—¡Lo siento! —ella gritó, mientras se abalanzaba sobre  Lucifer y Gabriel.

A su favor, Gabriel ya había dejado el café y Lucifer sostenía la taza lo bastante alto como para que ella no pudiera golpearla. Antes de que pudiera parpadear, el arcángel más bajo la había rodeado con sus brazos, usando su propio cuerpo para protegerla de Sam. 

���¡Vamos, Sambo! ¡Aún no he visto la foto! Seguro que nos vemos adorables.

La segunda oración obviamente estaba dirigida a Jo, y se encontró sonriendo a la cara del ángel. Por un momento se le trabó un poco la lengua. Los cinco hombres tenían unos ojos preciosos, pero Gabe era el único con iris marrones puros. Bueno, marrón no, ámbar, como el buen whisky. 

—Sí —dijo finalmente—, adorable.

Él le guiñó un ojo.

Sam gimió, pero cuando Jo levantó la vista, aparentemente Dean no estaba prestando mucha atención a sus payasadas. Casi había esperado que él estuviera tan enojado como su hermano menor.

¿A qué se debió eso?

Esta es una traducción autorizada. Recuerden apoyar la historia original.

Divisores de  cafekitsune