#adele brits

[bradenkleinstudio]

“Never lose sight of why, you are who you are; the reason people are into you, it’s because of something you have in you, don’t even let go of that, ever!”

— Adele (BRIT Awards, 2022)

[summertine-blog1]

Welcome to the group, dear friends of George Michael, and have a good week. Today a notebook on the BRIT AWARDS. We always publish for you in JPEG and PDF files.

[insidecroydon]

Rewind: the real story behind Croydon's rich musical heritage

As an exhibition opens in the Clocktower about the history of music in Croydon, NEIL BENNETT, pictured left, the former BBC News and Croydon Advertiser journalist, asks how the borough has maintained such a strong musical tradition through all its highs and lows In the bag: Beanos record shop is long gone and much-missed It seems that not a week goes by without another talented and successful…

[jamminvroomvroom]

as sick as it sounds, i loved you first. 1

LN x fem!leclerc reader

part 1 of 2 -> find part two linked HERE!

in which you just can’t help yourself and neither can lando…

I’M BACK BITCHES!!!! hi sorry it’s been a while but we are back with what i hope is a bang lol. i’ve missed writing so much and as stressful as this was, i’m so so glad to be uploading something! i worked hard on this one and, of course, now i hate it whoops, but my girlie @lavenderlando made this possible and worth it. that’s my hype woman fr fr. N E WAY enjoy! lemme know what you think, and use some imagination for the timeline…

songs to set the vibe: i love you, i’m sorry by gracie abrams, 2hands by tate mcrae, love in the dark by adele, illicit affairs by taylor swift, think twice by suki waterhouse

warnings: 18+!! minors GO AWAY! smut, angst, fluff, kinda enemies to lovers? kinda? r is charles sister oop, miscommunication, both of them are down bad for eachother but they are also extremely dumb! breeding kink, size kink, pain kink (if u squint), unprotected p in v (don’t be silly!),

part 1: 10.3k words

1. oncoming traffic 

“hey, osc, who’s that girl hanging around leclerc? thought he was still with alex.” lando tries his best to sound nonchalant, but oscar can see through him like a freshly buffed window, the way lando clears his throat and nervously ruffles his unruly hair. 

“mate, i know you’re not the sharpest but i didn’t think you were that slow.” oscar laughs, side-eyeing the brit. he was baffled that lando was even asking. lando just shoots him a glare. “wait, you really don’t know?” lando’s glare hardens further, his eyes demanding an answer and oscar just laughs. “that’s his sister, you idiot. how have you never seen her?” 

lando didn’t know how he’d never seen her. this year had been nonstop, what with the pseudo-championship battle and the never ending media shitstorm that rained on him whenever he reared his head. he’d also learned in his years of racing never to look too closely at the women in another drivers entourage. that’s how you ended up in the wall during a race. but charles’ sister? how had he never noticed? 

“maybe i should go and introduce myself.” lando trailed off thoughtfully, his voice remaining playful. oscar snorted beside him, adjusting his racesuit. 

“ooh, yeah, send twitter into a frenzy. it’s been boring lately.” the aussie driver drawls sarcastically, successfully dodging lando’s rapidly approaching elbow to his ribs. 

“glad to know that you take pleasure in my never ending public humiliation!” lando grins maniacally, sauntering out of the garage, no longer any intention of seeking out the pretty girl in the short, black skirt. it was for the best. 

he’s passing through the pit box, immersed in a groupchat thread with max and p about a trip to portugal that he didn’t really want to go on, and bam! like the idiot oscar had just accused him of being, he slams blindly into oncoming traffic. 

oncoming traffic: the pretty girl in the short, black skirt.

“are you incapable of looking where you’re going?” your accent comes out thick, low with rage. it tickles his brain, like he’s heard it before. lando opens his mouth, like a fish out of water, closes it again pathetically. “seriously, for a pilot you have abysmal spacial awareness!” 

“sorry… what the fuck.” lando mutters. why is this woman shouting at him like she knows him? like he regularly barrels into her? 

“lando, yes?” you’ve calmed down a bit now, but you still speak through gritted teeth. 

“…yes?” he replies like he’s not so sure. 

“learn to look where you’re going.” you wrinkle your nose, composing yourself before stepping around him and strutting down the pitlane as if nothing had happened. 

lando stands there, fixed in place, watching her walk away in utter confusion. 

“smooth!” oscar calls from inside the garage, flanked by several laughing mechanics. 

“go fuck yourself!” lando’s flushed red, now, and beeline’s for the pit wall. 

he’s out of earshot when oscar says it. 

“think he just met his wife, boys.” 

-

lando is staring at the data on the screen when it hits him, will’s voice somewhere far away all of the sudden. 

the mysterious leclerc had every right to reprimand him, because she was right. he did need to learn how to look where he’s going. 

she’d told him that already, during their actual first meeting. 

-

2. the first collision 

the music was too loud, suffocating him along with the overbearing smell of cheap perfume, but the alcohol in his system and the outpouring of validation kept lando going. 

three time race winner, lando norris. 

five years of clawing back points and grabbing at podiums with two impatient hands had built up to this, to the incomparable glory of gracing that prestigious top step, and lando wasn’t about to let go of this moment just because of a pressing headache. max and pietra were waiting for him in a booth, surrounded by the rest of lando’s touring entourage. he was wracking up quite the tab, but it was all worth it. every slap on the back, seductive grin sent his way, made it worth it. 

he’s stumbling over his feet, wasted, or close to it, grinning lazily, peering through hooded eyes. the vodka cranberry in his hand is sloshing dangerously around in the glass, his careless movements propelling him towards disaster. 

lando hears the splatter of liquid, first, the scoff of disgust immediately after. long hair whips against his face as she turns, eyes wide with fury, set into a face that was never meant to look angry. he can smell vanilla, flowers. she’s an angel, turned devilish under the strobe lights, her delicate face morphing when he takes in the sight of him. 

“are you fucking serious? mon dieu!” her accent twists his tummy, as does the increasingly see-through material of her tight white dress, layers of chiffon turning transparent with the stark red liquid. it’s all over her back, running slowly down the length of her exposed thighs, sticky. lando stands there, utterly transfixed and useless. she looks like she might slap him; he kind of wants her to. “of course, just stand there. fucking pilots.” 

she mutters the last part and lando gulps. what does she know about other drivers? the implication makes his skin crawl for no reason, the idea of this nameless, mystery woman being familiar with his co-workers. he’s flushed with embarrassment for a multitude of reasons, opening his mouth just to close it again. 

“‘m sorry!” he finally calls out to her, over the music. can the dj turn that shit down? “can i buy you a drink?” she just glares at him, gesturing at her ruined dress. “or… a new dress?” lando tries again, flashing what he hopes are puppy dog eyes. 

he wants to take her back to his hotel room, lick the sweet liquid off of her frame, lap at her til she’s clean and crying. he wants to peel the stained white material off, tear it a little - it’s already ruined anyway! he can’t, though, because she’s wrinkling her nose at him, eyebrow raised, judging, and he’s awash with embarrassment all over again. the club spins and he feels nauseous. he finds max’s eyes on him, his friend stifling laughter at the tragic scene. 

she’s gone when he looks back, seems to have disappeared into a cloud of distinctly expensive perfume, and her friends are curling their lips up at him, dismissive. they don’t care who he is. he wonders if they’re redbull fans, ferrari fans, perhaps. 

he’s met with hoots of laughter as he slumps into the booth. he grabs a shot without a thought, doesn’t even register what liquor it is as it slides down his thick throat. 

“can’t believe you just did that. only you would spill a drink all over leclerc’s sister.” max teases, elbowing him playfully. 

“wha- he has a sister?” lando slurs, spluttering. 

he doesn’t remember much after that. 

youruser just posted on instagram:

tagged: francisca.cgomes, alexandrasaintmleux, charles_leclerc

liked by francisca.cgomes, alexandrasaintmleux, charles_leclerc and others.

youruser: shoutout to the guy that spilled his drink all over me!

francisca.cgomes: so beautiful so slay i miss u already

alexandrasaintmleux: love you!!!

charles_leclerc: delete this 🤦‍♂️

and other comments.

-

3. the watchful eyes of the big, black horse 

your arm is linked with kika’s, giggling with her as you walk through the paddock. 

“what about him?” kika whispers, pointing her chin towards one of the passing alpine mechanics. he’s blonde, pale, eyes dark.  “pierre said he heard that he’s good with the ladies.” she wiggles her eyebrows and your cheeks heat up, swatting her playfully. 

“i am not about to get a reputation for sleeping my way through the paddock.” you scoff. “plus, he’s not my type.” you shrug. 

“you need to start putting yourself out there more, you keep saying you want someone.” the portuguese girl reasons. you nod sheepishly. 

“i don’t wanna look for something, i want it to find me. is that pathetic? i just see how you are with pierre, how alex is with charles, and that’s what i want. something… real.” you sigh. kika sees the way your eyes gloss over with sadness. 

“it’s never as easy and as perfect as it looks, babe, trust me. and anyway, maybe just focus on… the thing you were telling me about.” kika lowers her voice, giving you the look.

“shut up!” you squeal. “god, i am not discussing that here!” 

“discussing what?” you hear pierre before you see him, hot with embarrassment. you’ve know him since before you could even walk, which is why you have no problem voicing your deepest, darkest shame. 

“how i’m not getting laid, apparently!” you drawl sarcastically, slapping your hand over your forehead. 

a poorly concealed laugh that you don’t recognise has you whipping around, eyes wide with bewilderment. it’s hearty, smooth, surprisingly warming. you practically growl when your eyes land on the source of the noise, standing next to pierre who looks embarrassed for you, his lips pressed thinly together to prevent himself from cackling. 

“why is he here?” you grit your teeth, squeezing your eyes so tightly shut that you feel a pang in your temples. 

“as polite as ever.” lando smirks. you open

your eyes just in time to catch him eyeing up the skin of your thighs that your skirt doesn’t quite cover. is he checking you out? 

“says the drink spiller.” you bite back, rolling your eyes. 

“hey, i tried to pay for the damage.” lando looks utterly amused, pink lips still twisted into a punch-worthy smirk. 

“so, you’ve met lando, then.” pierre grins, staring between you both. you don’t register the way he’s trading looks with kika, watching whatever this scene is unfold. 

“unfortunately!” you smile tightly at the racing drivers. 

“pretty sure you walked into me that second time. distracting me in the workplace, or something.” lando chimes in, enjoying this all a bit too much. 

“if you did a better job at looking where you’re going-“ 

“okay, so this has been delightful!” pierre buts in, knowing that you have the shortest temper of all the leclerc offspring. “you,” he points at you. “get laid. you,” he points at lando. “don’t piss her off, you won’t like the result.”

kika can only send you a sympathetic smile, and remind you of the coffee date you have scheduled for tomorrow morning, as she’s dragged away from your place of social suicide. pierre winks, tilts his head far too pointedly for your liking towards lando. you fantasise, in that moment, of clawing his eyes out. 

“i am sorry, for the record.” lando smiles at you, genuine and gleaming. something inside of you twists. 

“for which time?” you’re just teasing now, but he doesn’t need to know that. 

“you have quite the attitude on you. that why you’re not getting any?”

you’re about to rip his head off and give max an even easier ride towards the championship, but lando steps forward. you can smell old spice, tangy and alluring and masculine. 

“how fucking dare you-“ 

“because most men don’t know what to do with a woman like you. don’t know how to treat them right.” he’s so confident when he says it, leaning towards you in a way you can only describe as enticingly. 

“oh, and you do?” you scoff, arms crossed. you must remain combative, or else you’ll give in. is this rock bottom?

“i’m free tonight if you wanna find out.” 

“i’ll be far too busy doing literally anything else.” you can only pray he hasn’t caught the tremble in your voice, the ever so slight quiver of you bottom lip. you chew it into your mouth to stop yourself. 

“but not anyone else.” lando doesn’t pose it as a question. it seems that he’s got you all figured out. 

“whatever helps you and your hand sleep well tonight.” you spit. there’s heat between you, sparking into a flame that could burn down your whole life. you feel eyes burning into the back of your head - green ones that match yours. you falter. “i’m done here, lando. have a fantastic evening.” 

he takes another liberty, leaning in even closer. spearmint and the idea of a million bad choices flood your every pore. you can feel the big, black horse watching over you, now, set into bright yellow, adorned with ferrari red. looming, warning, turning you in. 

“you know, something tells me i will.” 

lando disappears first, not even giving you a chance you spin on your heel and storm off. you want to kill him, hurt him, sink your teeth into that bronzed, thick throat, claw into his back, down, down, down… until you’re on your knees and- 

“why were you talking to lando?” charles’ voice cuts through your filthy thoughts and you sign yourself over to god immediately, purifying yourself as you banish the visions of delicious sin. after all, you’re standing in the presence of il predestinato, the prince of monaco, a saint to many. but to you, he’s just your brother. your big brother, always in the way, always meddling, always, always watching. you sigh. 

“friendly conversation.” you quip, short. you love him dearly, would take bullets for him, but, god, he keeps you on a leash. leo’s has more give than the conceptual tether charles has to you, keeping you close, boyfriendless, out of “trouble”. you know why, and deep down, you’re beyond grateful, all things considered. you can’t admit that, though. 

“that’s not how pierre described it to me.” charles raises an eyebrow, voice bitter despite the clear attempt he’s made to try and hide it. 

“fucking pierre.” you grunt. “it’s nothing, he came over with pierre. i was with kika. first time i’ve ever even had a conversation with lando.” that didn’t result from a drink being spilt over you to the point of transparency. you leave that bit out - charles really doesn’t need to know that. 

charles mulls over your words, eyeing you suspiciously. you want to stomp your heeled foot like a child, a brat, scream and shout and kick and wail that he has to back the fuck off eventually, but you just smile innocently and pray he believes you. 

“okay,” he mutters, making his peace. “i don’t want you getting too… familiar with him. bad reputation. he used to be quite sweet until his last breakup and now he will fuck anything with a pulse.” you wrinkle your nose at your brothers crude words, feeling the need to jump in and object. but why? you don’t know lando, you don’t care about lando. you press your lips into a thin, painful line. “you should go back to the hotel with alex. looks like i’ll be here late.” he rolls his eyes, you know how it is. 

“sure, good luck.” you offer, smothering the rage that pools in your belly. let me fucking live, you think. just because he’d had to swoop in and save you from yourself once before, didn’t mean that you could live like this forever. 

he has lit a spark under you, one that spreads like a wildfire towards the flame that lando ignited minutes before. if only your brother knew how to keep his big mouth shut, you wouldn’t be spurred on to bad behaviour. 

if only lando hadn’t spilled that drink over you, maybe you wouldn’t be opening his instagram profile and sending a message request. 

a place. your room number. a time. 

you only wish you’d gotten to see the devilish grin on his face when he received it. 

lando can’t want you for the reasons that other guys do. your status as charles leclerc’s little sister, and the gateway to your brother that you provided, meant nothing to the brit. that’s why you’d let him have you; he wouldn’t try to take more than you wanted to give. 

-

4. generous 

the knocks are soft against the door, yet they manage to have every hair on your body standing to attention. you’re quick to let him in, itching to get him inside and away from prying eyes. this is clandestine, secret, could even feel somewhat sacred once it’s over, and the last possible thing you could ever need is for another soul to know what you intend to do with lando, what you intend to let him do to you. 

“hey.” 

“hi.” 

you stare at each other. 

he steps forward. you don’t move away. he takes it as an invitation to close the space entirely, so close that, there it is again: oldspice, except this time it’s mixed with something fresh, shower gel you guess, sea salt. his curls are crisper than they were a few hours ago, still damp from the shower he must have just taken. 

“what changed your mind?” he asks. 

“i was feeling generous.” you deadpan. he bites back a laugh. 

“generous, huh?”

“very.” 

“considering your alleged dry spell, i’d say i’m the generous one, no?” his voiced is edged with something dark, dropped a few octaves. you could absolutely squirm under his gaze, but you hold strong. 

“you know where the door is if that’s how you’re gonna be.” you coo, mocking his seductive undercurrent. all he does is flash his teeth, grinning cheekily, his way of accepting your challenge, your attitude. 

“i think you want me to stay, honey.” 

honey. you fear it works on you. the gap closes even further, you fear it’s your doing. 

“you’re only getting this opportunity because i invited you here.” your resolve is slipping. you’ve admitted that you want him in your pathetic bid to hold the power, when the truth is, you want him to pounce on you, strip away every layer and barrier and make you see stars, feel euphoric. 

“okay, honey, whatever you say.” he chuckles, cruel and taunting. “so, how dry of a spell has it been? wanna know what i’m working with.” 

lando touches you then, lightning shooting down your arm as he traces from your elbow down to your fingers, featherlight, barely there, a ghost of a touch that haunts you so deliciously. your fingers intertwine. you initiate it, but really, it’s his fault. this is all his fault.

you try and laugh, but it sounds broken, quivering it’s way out from your dry throat. 

“dry.”

he just stares at you, expectant. he needs to hear more, needs to know. he craves details about you, has ever since you body slammed him outside his garage - leading to some very covert instagram stalking on his behalf and his oh so convenient way of worming his way into a conversation with pierre when lando could see that the other driver was on his way over towards you. it’s pathetic, maybe, but he craves you the way one craves nicotine forever after just one puff of a cigarette. he has you, just for tonight, maybe longer if he gets this right, so he will know everything he needs to know so that he can touch you just how you need. 

“i’ve only… it’s been a while.” 

he sees right through you. 

“you’ve only what?” he presses. he needs to know.

“i’ve only done this once.” you whisper. it’s the meekest he’s seen you. he loathes it. 

“and was it good?” lando murmurs so attentively that you want to cry. 

your fourth interaction with this man, and he has you melting. 

“not really.” 

“do you trust me?” his nose is bumping yours. you’re locked in, twitching. he has both hands on you, now, one still laced with yours, the other trailing up your arm, tempted to brush his fingertips against the taut skin of your neck. 

how the fuck can i trust you? i don’t know you! what the fuck are we doing? what the fuck am i doing?

that’s not what you say, though, because for some reason, you are so sickeningly comfortable and okay that you worry that something is wrong with you. 

“yes.”

“then this time will be so, so much better. i’ll make it all better.” 

when his lips meet yours, you’re surprised at how good it immediately feels. you don’t know what you were expecting, but his lips are plush, enveloping yours softly, but firm enough that you sink into him, allowing him to cement that grip on the side of your neck that he’d been taunting you with. 

he kisses you like he’s sure of everything, like this is second nature and you’ve done it a thousand times. you want to kiss him a thousand times. why it’s so good, you’re not sure, but it gives you the confidence to lean into him, grab the bottom of his hoodie in your hands and tug. 

“be patient, ‘n i’ll make you feel so good, honey, i promise.” he mouths down your cheek, nipping at your jaw, down your neck until he finds that special spot below your ear. he nibbles there, lapping his tongue over your sensitive skin like he already knows your body. you want to see just how familiar with you he can get. “but,” he punctuates the word with a sharp bite. you both dread and revel in the mark it will leave. “you have to behave for me, okay?” 

his words are whispered against the shell of your ear and you shiver, eyes rolled back already. you wonder if he’ll get them to do a full three-sixty rotation in your skull. 

“‘kay.” you breathe, mindless, floating away. it’s already better than last time.

“‘kay’?” he mocks. “no, honey, you gotta promise me. can you promise me?” 

“promise.” you lock eyes, conveying your obedience. his eyes blow wide, pupils dilating to shove away the mysterious bluey green. his teeth grit. he knows he’s hit the jackpot. 

“good girl.” 

you’re stripped naked, mustering all of your energy to shove his clothes off, his hoodie flying away, his sweats kicked into a faraway dark corner. you’re left naked, him in some increasingly tight boxers, and you tumble into the freshly made bed. he slinks over you, crawling on his hands and knees, predator stalking prey. 

he stains your inner thighs purple, tugging your legs over his shoulder, huge hands warm and rough as they manoeuvre your malleable body to his liking. lando presses kisses to every inch of skin, dragging his tongue over your bare flesh before he spreads you open, sucking and tasting and savouring. he moans into you, open and wet, and it ricochets off of every nerve ending, sending your body taut and arched, catlike. you’re trying to get away, whilst simultaneously grinding yourself closed to him, feeling that broad, sharp nose of his bump messily and firmly against your clit, an ache spreading through your pelvis that makes you shake and shake and whine his name out to the gods. 

“taste like heaven.” lando’s words are simple, straightforward, make you bite your lip so hard you taste something metallic seeping over your tongue. “so tight, even around my tongue,” he slurs, drunk, lost. “gotta stretch you out for me. that okay, honey?” you can just about make it all out, and you nod furiously, pleading. 

his teeth graze your clit. 

“say please.” 

“putain! please!” you kick your feet out when all he does is laugh into your wet flesh. 

one finger grazes through your folds, parting them and collecting a mess of your slick. he looks transfixed as it drips down his finger. 

honey.

you watch him watch how he opens you up, revelling in the utter fascination painting his features, pussy drunk and curious, transfixed. 

“can’t believe you’ve never been fucked right.” he coos, breathless, genuinely shocked. you quake under his skilful hands and his awful, sinful, dirty mouth. 

“more.” you plead, not ashamed by your crude begging. you’re a mess for him already, might as well get the full experience. 

“think you can take another?” 

a second finger slides in, rocking against your walls, testing the waters. you writhe, meeting his movements with shallow thrusts of your hips. 

“faster, i need- mon dieu! anything, lando, please just-“ he really goes to town then, scissoring your dripping cunt open, curling and twisting and grinding the two digits so deep that you see white, hazy chocolate coloured curls and deep, glazed over eyes. 

“that’s it, honey, there you go. so fucking pretty for me.” lando whispers the last bit, awestruck, and you’d take the time to wonder why if you weren’t on the verge of tears, overstimulated, ears ringing. your orgasm crashes over you like a surge of electricity, tearing through your body like it’s trying to escape and take cover. it’s so strong that you’re damp everywhere, sweating and crying and so fucking shocked that it can feel like this. 

“lando.” you pant, mouth dry, voice hoarse.  

“you did so good. was it okay?” he rubs small circles into your hips, eyes flitting between your own and where you’re still leaking for him. he manages to tear his eyes away, like a trance has broken, snaking up your body until he’s laying next to you, propped up on his elbow. he hovers over you, raking his eyes over the rising and falling lines of your body. 

“pretty good, i guess. didn’t know you had it in you.” you tease, smirking lazily up at him. 

you want to keep staring at him but your vision is blurring as your eyes begin to droop. what a long day it’s been. 

“high praise coming from you.” lando reasons, laughing lightly. he strokes over your hipbone and you jolt, curling around onto your side. his skin is warm against yours, soft and smooth, and you dare you press your even closer, shy, as if he wasn’t just buried mercilessly between your legs. you hum in response, spent and languid. “you wanna get some sleep?” he asks. 

“we didn’t… i mean, you didn’t…” you trail off, awkward, gesturing towards his middle. 

lando just smiles. 

“guess i’ll just have to come find you in monaco.” 

you flush, cheeks burning as you consider the fact that you’re gonna be in the same country, a very small, very private city. who knows what could happen? 

you fall asleep quickly, easily, far too comfortable next to the british driver. if you were to ask, he’d say he left immediately. he watches the way you breathe far too intently, ever so slowly pulling his clothes back on. he doesn’t know how long passes, but what he does know is that he can’t wait to have you like this again. 

-

5.  some guy 

you sink into the oversized armchair, sitting back and letting kika and alex talk, nattering backwards and forwards about nothing in particular. or, maybe you’re just zoned the fuck out. 

you can’t stop thinking about the way he touched you, your body littered with evidence, dark purple bruises turning a stale green between you thighs. when you woke up, you initially wondered if it was all a dream, but the dull, sweet ache thrumming through your bones told you just how real it really was. you went through the motions, embarrassed momentarily before deciding to just embrace it, try to bask in the way he’d made you feel: sexy and desirable and electric. 

it was just a shame that it had to be him. that’s what you kept telling yourself, at least. 

kika’s nodding along to a story alex is telling about leo, about to respond with a similar anecdote about simba but she gasps instead, almost spilling her americano all over herself. this gets your attention and you open your mouth to ask her is she’s okay, but she beats you to it. 

“my god, what is that?” she chokes, staring at you. or, well, your neck. 

you flush, heated, blood pooling in your cheeks. 

you’d tried to cover it up, seriously, applying layer after layer of concealer and strategically placing your hair in such a way that you prayed it wouldn’t be noticeable, but nonetheless, there it is, clear as day. red raw skin tinged purple around the seams, branded into your neck like some kind of public humiliation ritual. 

fuck you, lando fucking norris!

you avert eye contact, leaning away from alex who is now making a point of leaning in, going as far as to push your hair back so she can get a closer look. 

“oh my gosh!” she squeals, giggling with kika. 

you take a long, slow gulp of coffee, not caring that it burns your tongue. 

“who was it? holy shit, was it lando?” kika whisper shouts and you officially drop dead on the spot, watching her connect the dots so easily. 

“oh jesus, no! no!” you lie, feigning offence, your leg bouncing shamefully under the table. the two girls eye you suspiciously, but you assume you’ve played it off well. 

“who, then?” alex asks. you wonder if kika has told her about yesterdays interaction. 

“just- i don’t even know, some guy.” you huff, playing with a loose thread hanging from your jumper. 

“some guy? after what you were saying yesterday? okay, babe.” kika teases sarcastically. “no, cmon, who?” she pouts, leaning in as well. 

“just… someone.” you squeak, unable to look up at them. 

“okay, well, we will find out eventually.” alex wiggles her eyebrows and you stick your tongue out, mock-glaring at your sister in law. 

“no, the fuck you won’t.” you try and fake some confidence, scrapping for a mere shred of control. 

yes, the fuck they will, because when you leave for the bathroom, you leave your phone unlocked like the utter fool you are. god has it out for you, you figure, because that’s when he chooses to strike. 

the message lando sends you is short and sweet, and alex chokes on a piece of cake when kika starts gesturing wildly at the notification that pops up on your screen. 

for when you’re lonely at home and can’t find anyone to fuck you right.

attached is his address. 

they don’t breathe a word when you come back, but they share a knowing smirk when they catch you smiling at your phone, and again when you ask if either of them have anything with a higher neckline that you can wear for the race. 

youruser has just posted on instagram:

tagged: francisca.cgomes, alexandrasaintmleux

liked by: francisca.cgomes, alexandrasaintmleux, landonorris and others

youruser: race day, big slay

user1: LEO!!!

alexandrasaintmleux: prettiest girl in the world

user45: lando what are you doing here 🤔

6.    manners

“are you even listening to me right now?” charles scoffs, finishing off his drink out of annoyance. your eyes snap back to him, the thumping music vibrating through your body. 

“sorry, just tipsy.” you purse your lips, attempting to lock back in on whatever he’s saying, but it’s hard. it’s hard, because sprawled out in a booth across from where you stand at the bar, lando is watching your every move. 

you’ve managed to avoid him thus far, no contact since you’d liked the DM he’d sent you a few weeks back. you’d be lying through your teeth if you said you didn’t think of him and what you’d done at literally every waking moment, so the way he’s watching you, hooded eyes sparkling under the strobe lights, has you squirming. it was easier to tell yourself that, surely, it wasn’t that good when he wasn’t right in front of you in a half unbuttoned shirt. the navy blue fabric is wrapped around his body deliciously, taut where his muscles are, the colour popping against his tanned skin - which you can practically feel writhing against yours. 

you wish charles would go away so you could crawl into that booth and commit public indecency. 

speak of the devil, your brother seems to have clocked that you have zero interest in what he has to say so he huffs, ordering another round for the table and telling you he’s going to find alex. he shuffles away and you subtly search for the british drivers mindful eyes, but he’s disappeared, left his entourage in the booth. you swallow disappointment that makes you feel pathetic, head in your hands against the bar top, but the lightest brush of fingers against your waist drags you out of your spiral. you know immediately. 

“did you dress like that for me, or are you just a slut?” he’s grinning, light and teasing, surprisingly sober, tipsy at most, just like you. 

“i could ask you the same.” you smirk, blatantly eyeing his exposed chest. he shrugs, leaning in. 

”might have left an extra button undone just for you.” lando winks and you hope the lights hide the way you flush. 

“sure you did, just for me and every other girl in here.” you challenge. his eyebrows furrow. 

“nope. just for you.” his eyes darken, just a tad but enough that you notice. your mouth runs dry. “you never replied to me.” 

“not true, i liked the message.” you smile coyly, sipping your drink. your lipstick smears against the rim of the glass and you watch him stare at the print, tongue wetting his lips. 

“you are something else.” he shakes his head, pushing his curls back. it could be frustration, but he still seems at ease, like he’s enjoying your combative nature. you smile into the glass, hoping he doesn’t notice. he does. “how much have you had to drink?” 

“this is my second.” 

“you sober enough for me to take you home?” lando’s face is mere inches away from yours now, and you can feel the pull, desperate to crawl into the space that still remains and lose yourself there. 

“depends.” 

“on?” you truly exasperate him, but he thinks he loves it. 

“if you’re actually gonna fuck me this time.” you casually take another sip, playing it off as if your crude words had no impact on you. 

lando’s eyes widen at your bluntness, and so does his grin. 

“meet me by the valet.” 

lando leaves, and you quickly follow, downing the remnants of your glass and touching up your lipgloss. 

-

alex watches from her booth, and pulls out her phone. 

to: kika gomes 

oh, she’s deeeeefinitely sleeping with lando!!!  

-

pietra leans towards her boyfriend, close enough that he can hear her over the noise. 

“isn’t that charles’ sister?” she shouts, pointing to the bar, where lando is stood. 

max analyses the way he’s stood, leant  against the bar, nice and close to the ferrari drivers little sister. he knows that look on lando’s face, and he knows it far too well. max pinches the bridge of his nose. 

“oh for fuck sake.” 

-

it’s weird, sitting with him in silence. he’s only had half a drink, able to drive back through the winding hills to his apartment. you stare out the window, mostly, when you aren’t staring blatantly and curiously at lando. you can see the sea, glistening under the moonlight and you wish you could focus on that instead, but he’s there, and you have to admit - begrudgingly, albeit - that he’s stunning. his hands wrap around the wheel tauntingly, as if he’s trying to convey how he’ll touch you, all consumingly. your thighs press together, your fingers clasping together as if you’re subconsciously stopping yourself from reaching out for him prematurely. 

as if he can hear your thoughts, his palm smoothes over the skin of your bare thigh, right where your dress has ridden up, without a second thought, nothing tentative about the way his digits curve around your skin. 

“so, you’ve been thinking about that night, then?” he breaks the silence, glancing over at you. 

“what makes you say that?” you whisper, not even meaning to but the silence had been so heavy. 

“well, you only left with me on the condition i’d bend you over.” he laughs loud, whole and warm. you fight it, just for a second, but then you join in, giving in to him. you can’t help it, he makes it easy. 

“you got me.” you concede, rolling your eyes. without realising it, you’ve relaxed completely into his touch. 

he pulls off of the road and into a private garage. you breath hitches.

-

“do you want a drink or…?” lando gestures blindly towards his kitchen, walking further into the apartment. 

he’d spent the elevator ride up to his place leant against the opposite wall, taunting, making you wait. he’d let himself look at you, totally unabashedly, raking his eyes over your frame, meekly tucked into the corner, shy under his intense gaze but frustrated by his lack of urgency. 

“i’m good. didn’t come here for a tea party.” you hope your words push his buttons. they must, because he turns on his heel, facing you again, suddenly towering over you. 

his eyes are steel, face serious, and you don’t know what to do. you’ve never seen him look at you like this. 

“i think we need to work on your manners.” he speaks condescendingly, down at you, and if you weren’t so needy, hadn’t been waiting weeks, you’d turn around and leave just to really prove his point. but you stay planted, looking up at him through mascara coated lashes, softening you gaze until you’re sure you’re conveying faux innocence. 

“maybe we can work on them in your bedroom.” you truly don’t know where you get this confidence from, he’s the second man to have ever touched you so intimately, but he’s magnetic, drawing you out of your own head and straight towards him. 

he tugs you towards him, kissing you messily, right there in the dim light of his kitchen, pawing at your waist hungrily. his tongue brushes your and you moan, humming into his mouth at the faint taste of mint and vodka, long gone but you can taste everything. his thick fingers find your ass, hoisting you up until you have no option but to wrap your legs around him, your dress scratching at your thighs the higher it rides up, but all it does it turn you on more, rough sensations on sensitive skin. 

lando walks you blindly to his bedroom, never breaking the kiss, and you wonder how many times he’s done this to get it down to muscle memory. the thought makes you nauseous, drags you mercilessly right back into your head, and you pull away, your lips barely brushing his. 

“why me?” you breathe, panting into the shallow space where your mouths have parted.

“what?” he whispers, confused. 

“why do you want to do this with me?” you have to check, past insecurities rising to the surface like bile in the back of your throat. he looks genuinely baffled and you feel foolish for ruining the moment. 

“why wouldn’t i? you’re gorgeous and-“ he cuts himself off, his eyes glazing over. the demeanour slips and you’re stuck, his arms still tight around you, holding you close in the empty space at the foot of his bed. 

“what?” you whisper. 

“you’re part of the same life.” the way he looks at you says words that he can’t. 

words that will sound too shallow and too selfish and too meaningless, even though you will understand them because you’re here for similar reasons, and therefore, they will mean too much. 

you can’t take things from him. you can’t fake it. you can’t break him into a million pieces when he finally discovers that you want him because of what he can give you.

you nod once, firm.  

“i get it.” you smile sadly. lando wants to know more. he can find out some other time. a moment of clarity passes between you. “kiss me, again?” you ask. he delivers immediately. 

kisses you all the way onto the bed. kisses you while he helps you take off your heels, while he drags the zipper of your dress down. you both feel safe now, understood, and that really moves things along. 

“so pretty.” he mutters into your skin, shedding you of your tight dress. 

your shaky fingers work over the buttons of his shirt, peeling it off of his broad shoulders, taking in the sight of him all over again. you’re left in your panties, braless already, and he gawks down at you, like he’s seeing everything for the first time. it makes you feel powerful. 

“can you hurry up?” you writhe, arching into his touch. he smiles, covering his body with yours and pressing a kiss to your lips. his fingers slide over the curves of your body, finding the band of your underwear and toying with it. 

“want me to take them off?” he purrs, trailing his lips down your jaw to just below your ear. 

“now.” you beg, eyes fluttering closed as his warm breath pricks at your skin, teeth nibbling. “no marks.” you whine, flashing back to the weeks over knowing looks and attempts at covering the last one up. 

“what were we saying about manners, hm? gonna need to start hearing some ‘pleases’ and ‘thank yous’, okay, honey?” he bites down again, harder this time, and you squirm underneath him, your soft belly moulding to each dip of his abs.

his fingers dip into your panties, finding your clit amongst your wetness. you just about bite back a moan, but you can’t help but roll your hips into his hand, his fingertips gliding easily through your folds. 

“va te faire foutre.” you mutter, teeth gritting at the pleasure and his words. go fuck yourself.

“i’ve lived in monaco long enough to know what that means.” lando whispers, pinching your clit once before plunging a finger inside of you. 

you hiss, head thrown back, the feeling of him smiling against the hickey bittersweet. and to think, it was almost healed. you can’t help but keen into his touch. 

“more,” you pant. “please.”

“you learn fast.” lando approves, and quickly fulfils your request, adding another finger. 

they flex inside of you, grinding deeper and deeper until you’re whimpering his name and leaking down his wrist. your arms wrap around him, nails digging in to his smooth back, his ropey muscles tensing under your firm touch. his thumb bumps your clit, over and over, pushing you to the precipice, so close you can taste the impending orgasm on your tongue. 

“it’s so good, merci, god.” you sound wrecked already, and lando can’t wait to see how far he can push, how far apart he can take you.  

“that other fucking loser didn’t know what he had, jesus, you’re so fucking hot.” he rasps, admiring the rise and fall of your chest, how your breasts bounce with every thrust of his fingers, the way his hand is glistening in the low light of his bedroom. his words are your undoing, the awe in his voice sending sparks shooting through every nerve ending. 

“lando, ‘m gonna… putain!” the way you switch languages is sexy to him, tells him how scrambled your brain is, and he twitches in his boxers. when you cum, it’s as gorgeous and as enticing as the first time, and he jolts against your hip, desperate to get inside of you finally. 

“you’re so beautiful.” he groans, pulling his fingers from your entrance. he stares blindly at the mess you’ve made on them, salivating, remembering the way you taste. it’s a no brainer for him, and he licks both digits clean, giving you just a moment to recover. 

“i need you.” you whisper, your legs still spread, quivering slightly. 

you pull him in once more, his covered crotch grinding against your slick and you cry out, the friction sending you into overdrive. his teeth dig into your shoulder, the sensation entrapping him, leaving him weak, ready to give you whatever you ask. he pushes his underwear away, and your eyes go wide. 

“you can have me,” he grunts, running his hand over himself. “think you can take it?” he wets his lips and you think you could cum again at the sight of him. sweat slicked, tight curls falling over his eyes, lips licked pink and kiss swollen, hard and heavy in his own hand, body curved over yours possessively. you’re a simple woman, really. 

“i think i can try.” you want to sound confident, but it comes out as a squeak. 

he sits back on his knees and brings his free hand to cup your jaw. 

“i’ll go slow with you, honey, okay? you can tell me to stop.” lando promises. “you sure you want this?” 

you nod, pouting up at him. 

“i want you, i can take it.” you manage through a deep breath. 

the stretch is brutal, splitting you in half. all you can do is breathe, watching the way he watches you, and that’s what you hone in on, his pretty eyes watching where he’s filling you up. when he bottoms out, he stops for a second, scanning your face for discomfort. 

“are you okay?” 

“c’mere.” you coo, and he falls back over you, paws at your waist. “move, lando.” you plead. 

it’s slow, deep, makes your toes tingle. you can feel each and every drag of him against your walls and it makes you dizzy, a knot twisting and tickling in your belly. your fingers are twisted around him, around his biceps, crumbling a little bit every time he flexes in your grip. 

“oh, mon dieu.” you’re whimpering, legs wrapping around him like vines, tighter and tighter with every buck of his hips. 

“‘s it feel good, honey? yeah? you’re so fucking tight for me.” lando chokes, licking over the sweat on your collarbone. “‘m i making it feel good?” he sounds so cocky, sexy, but there’s a soft edge around his words. it matters to him, how he’s treating you, this, a certain delicateness hanging around your intertwined bodies like a cloud. 

“so good, lando, so fucking good.” the words scratch your throat raw, and your teeth sink into your bottom lip. 

“no, no, lemme hear you, pretty girl. can feel how close you are for me.” you can hear the edge to his voice, can tell the end is near for both of you, the way his words wobble despite his best attempts at hiding it. “need you to look at me, and i need to hear you.” 

you don’t even realise until then that your eyes are shut, screwed up tight as the pleasure rolls through your body, flooding each and every one of your senses. you free your lip, and everything pours out, whines, raw slurs of his name. 

“i’m so close.” he grunts, watching the way your face moves, hanging on to every micro expression, the way you battle to keep all of your attention on him. 

“fill me up.” you urge, squeezing his hips between your thighs. his eyes widen, the request slowly registering, and he blinks away the voice in his head telling him to do it. 

“you know i can’t.” he’s firm, sensible even if you aren’t. 

“want it so bad, lan, please, wanna feel it.” you reason, cupping his face and pushing his curls back. 

“not tonight.”

“yes, tonight. give it to me.”

“i said no, don’t be a fucking brat.” he hisses, squeezing his eyes shut. 

“know you want it.” you whisper, seductive and devious. you can see his resolve slipping, tightening around him. 

before you can say anything else, your hands are scooped up, pinned above your head. he’s right over you now, your hips perfectly aligned, and he’s driving so deep that you swear you can feel him in your tummy. his thrusts resort to a harsh grind, digging into each other with every snap of his pelvis. 

“you want it so bad? huh? fine.” he growls, forehead resting against yours. “want me to cum in you, fuck it all back in? yeah, honey? you gonna keep it all in for me?”

“whatever you want.” you promise, eyes rolling back in your head. “just- please, please do it.” you pant, mouth dry. 

“that’s it, pretty girl, take it all for me.” he buries his face in your neck, nipping at your collarbone. “doing so good.” the words fan against your throat, hushed, leaving you warm from the inside out, brainless. 

when you spill around him, it’s at the same time as he lets go, and he fucks you through your orgasms. you go limp beneath him, taking it, letting it all wash over you, letting him wash all over you. you feel like you can’t breathe, suffocating under the weight of him and the reality of what you’ve just done. again. for some reason, you don’t care, and decide that you’ll do this again and again, anytime he’ll have you. not that you’ll ever tell him that… 

“fuck.” he exhales, rolling off of you carefully, but the overstimulation - and then lack thereof - makes you wince, and he strokes your hip gently in apology. 

“that was better than i thought it would be.” you grin, staring blankly up at the ceiling.

“you know, these are starting to sound kinda backhanded.” he beams, laughing breathlessly, but just as he begins to relax into his bedspread, he remembers. “oh fuck, shit, we need a pharmacy!” lando bolts up so that he’s sitting, scanning the room blindly for his clothes. you giggle and he snaps his head towards you, panicked. 

“no, lando, we don’t.” 

“all of that ‘uh, fill me up, please lando you’re so sexy’ talk means that, yes we absolutely do! fuck, how much is plan b these days?” he’s spiralling now, tugging at his curls. 

“first of all, i’m on birth control. second of all, i don’t sound like that, and most importantly, i did not call you sexy.” you smirk, stretching out your tight muscles. 

“that’s the most important part? woman, you nearly killed me.” lando gasps, slumping back down into bed. 

“‘m sorry, couldn’t resist playing with you a little. good to know we share a kink, though.” your smirk turns into a coy smile, and you swing your shaky legs out of the bed, your feet sinking into the plush rug. 

“oh, yeah? what other kinks are you hiding from me?” lando sits back against the headboard, tucking his hands behind his bed. you have to look away, or else you’ll accidentally fall back into his bed. 

“guess you’ll have to wait and find out.” it makes him quirk an eyebrow, a look of understanding settling over his face. 

“so this is gonna be a regular thing, yeah?” 

you’re putting your underwear back on when he says it, searching for your dress, but his words make you freeze. he sounds hopeful, and it makes your chest pang… wait, is that your heart?

“i don’t… i mean, as you unfortunately know, i haven’t done this before. i don’t know how this works.” you say it so earnestly, so innocently, that his whole face softens, awestruck and boyish. 

“i want it to be a regular thing.” he says it gently, like he’s offering it to you, to the universe. 

“okay. me too.” you whisper back, shy under his gaze. 

“are you… like, do you think you’ll be sleeping with other people?” lando squeaks, doing a terrible job of playing it cool. 

“for so many reasons, no.” you grimace. “but if we’re doing this then i wouldn’t want to anyway.” you say softly. your dress is back on now, but he has you flustered, and you can’t quite get the zipper. 

“lemme help.” he offers, and he’s out of bed and before you in a matter of seconds. his calloused fingers graze your skin as he pulls the zipper together and up, adjusting your dress back into place. it feels so terrifyingly intimate, exciting, and you can’t bring yourself to move away. “i wouldn’t want to either.” he breathes the words quietly into the small space between you. 

“okay.” you don’t even try to hide the way you beam, staring up at him. 

“i’ll take you home, yeah?” 

“yeah.”

-

7.  worth it

and so, begins a clandestine affair, touches in the shadows, subtle glances, watchful eyes. 

one of you calls, the other comes, sneaking through doors that neither of you should enter, leaving bars a few minutes apart, making up excuses to get out of plans. 

there’s the time lando has you bent over the end of your bed, tears leaking into the mattress, slick everywhere. he’s so deep this way, hammering away at the special spot nestled within you that he’s become very familiar with. one of his hands is dragging your hips back to meet his thrusts, the other splayed out across your back, holding you down. 

your phone rings. it’s alex. you were supposed to be a brunch twenty minutes ago. you groan out, frustrated in every sense of the word. 

“answer it, honey.” lando grunts, pulling you towards him even harder. you whimper, shaking your head, words dying on your tongue. “go on, i know you can do it. wouldn’t want alex to worry, would you? let her know you’re okay.” he coos, condescending. 

he’s so arrogant, full of it, and you like the challenge. you can’t let him win, can’t let him revel in how fucked out he has you, so against your better judgement, you grab the phone, fingers shaking as you answer. 

“hi, love. i know, i’m late! ‘m sorry, i’ll be there soon!” you wince at the way your voice shakes. you hope she can’t hear the way you’re panting, or the sound of his hips hitting yours. 

lando slows his hips, hitting deep at such a torturously slow pace that feels a million times better than it already did. your free hand flies back, swatting at him. 

“where the hell are you? i was worried!” alex sounds relieved, but there’s something else in her tone that you can’t quite decipher. 

“i’m on my way, i promise! i was with arthur.” you lie, throwing your younger brother into the line of fire. you know, for credibility. alex is silent for a moment. 

“oh, okay. well, get here soon, please! love you!” and with that, she hangs up the phone. you release a breath you were holding, crying out when lando immediately speeds up again. 

“i hate you.” you choke, grinding your hips into him. lando just scoffs, sliding a hand under your belly, flush against the mattress. he finds your clit, playing with it, urging you quickly towards your release. 

“no, you don’t.” he laughs. “you better cum for me, pretty girl, i think you have somewhere to be.” 

-

“i’m on my way, i promise! i was with arthur.”

alex has to bite back a laugh. she stares across the table, where arthur is having an avid debate with charles and joris. arthur, who had been with her and charles for hours. 

“oh, okay. well, get here soon, please! love you!” alex hangs up the phone, giggling to herself. leo stirs in her lap. 

“what’s so funny?” charles asks her. she shakes her head. 

“oh, nothing, she just overslept.” 

-

there’s the time where he has you hiked up on your kitchen counter, messy curls tickling the insides of your thighs. he’s licking at you ravenously, dragging his tongue up and down, twisting around your clit in circles. 

you’re tugging on his hair, holding him close to where you’re aching, dripping, slicking up the lower half of his face. he’s groaning into you, starved and desperate. it’s been a week since you’ve seen him, had him like this, the longest you’ve done without him since the first time you’d had sex. its untamed and needy and you fear what it means, the way you’re so addicted to one another. 

you also haven’t seen your brother for a week, something you realise when you hear a key turn in the lock, down the corridor. you have seconds to react, the noise washing over you like a bucket of ice cold water. you squirm, pushing a very confused lando away, managing to kick him lightly in the head as you leap from the counter. 

“mon dieu! fuck, i’m sorry!” you gasp. 

“what the fuck is going on-“ you cut him off, slapping your palm over his mouth. 

you glance around frantically, looking for a way out of this. there is but one option available. 

“the balcony! just- fuck, get out there!” you shoo him over to the small window, begging him with your eyes. “please! i’ll get rid of him!” 

you can hear footsteps approaching. you’re sweating now, smoothing down your skirt and your hair anxiously.

charles calls your name, rounding the corner  and walking into your kitchen, just as you pull the window closed again. 

“shit, you scared me!” you fake, clutching your chest. you can feel your heart hammering. 

“i did knock, sorry!” charles looks you over, scanning the kitchen. “are you okay?” 

“yeah, fine, sorry, i must have been out of it. i’m in the middle of an assignment.” you lie. 

“oh okay, well i can always go…” he’s looking at you weirdly, and you fear he knows something, that he can tell. 

“can we get dinner tonight? i’ll book.” you offer, scratching your neck. 

“yeah, that’s great. are you sure you’re okay?” your brother asks, turning to leave. 

“promise, yeah, i’m just so busy with work, deadlines and all that.” you wrinkle you nose, feigning distaste. 

“well you can tell me all about it later, okay? love you.” charles says sincerely, smiling. 

“love you too.” you call, listening for the sound of the door closing behind him. 

you immediately rush for the window, throwing it open, peeking your head out. lando stands with his back against the wall, shivering in nothing but a t-shirt. you look at him sheepishly. 

“get back in here.” you tell him, standing back to give him space to crawl back through. “‘m sorry.” you giggle. 

“you’re lucky you’re worth it.” lando teases, stalking towards you and wrapping you in his arms. his skin is cold against yours, and you huff, try and push him off. “hey, i’m cold!” he pouts. 

“you know, you’re lucky you’re worth it, i could have just let him murder you.” you reason, looking up at him. your hands slide around him, returning his embrace, warm hands skating up under his shirt. 

“you wouldn’t.” he says simply. “i’m way too good in bed.” 

“you keep telling yourself that, norris.” 

“i don’t need to, you tell me more than enough.” 

lando leans down to kiss you, then, nothing all that unusual but it always feels like a step too far, intimate in a way that you two usually aren’t. you kiss him back regardless, because really, you love it. he always tastes minty, divine when you let him lick into your

mouth. 

“i believe we were in the middle of something.” he whispers. 

“remind me.” you breathe. 

-

and there’s also the time where he’s fucking you in his drivers room, the massage table thudding dully against the wall with every hard thrust. 

his race suit is pulled down just enough, your dress bunched around your hips, and he’s slamming into you mercilessly.

the whole thing was a blur, really; you’d always vowed that you would never have sex at a race track, but that promise was old news, now, broken the very second you caught the way he was staring at you. his eyes were hard, unreadable, jaw clenched as he glared at the man talking to you. you were just being friendly, catching up with franco, but lando wouldn’t have it, not after such a shitty race. one harsh snap of his neck towards the mclaren motorhome had you quickly excusing yourself. you knew what it meant. 

“you don’t talk to me at the track but you let him?” lando growls, rutting into you wildly. you cling onto the damp material of his racesuit, head thrown back. 

“was just saying hello.” you gasp out, opening your eyes to look up at him. he’s staring down at you, angry. it’s hot.

“i don’t wanna see you talking to him. you see how he was looking at you? fucker should know who you belong to.” he hisses, sliding his hand between your legs. “you’re gonna cum for me when i say, okay? and you’re gonna be nice and loud, honey. no holding back.” 

“lando i’m-“

“when. i. say.” he cuts you off, punctuating each order with a snap of his hips. 

all you can do is take it, dripping all over him. you can hear it, the wet squelch of him filling you up. 

“should mark up this pretty neck, yeah? let everyone know that you already belong to someone.” 

you barely register what he’s saying, but the words leave you hot, pushing you even closer to the edge and you clamp down around him. 

“squeezing me so tight, bet you’ve wanted me all day, huh, honey? saw you looking at me earlier, pretending like you weren’t when i caught you. couldn’t just asked and i would’ve fucked you right then.” lando grunts. you wail out, thrashing against the makeshift bed and he nods, letting you know it’s okay. 

“that’s right, pretty girl, that’s it. been so good letting me have you. cum for me, baby.” 

baby.

it’s the first time he’s ever called you that. it’s the final push you need. 

he collapses into you as he finishes, sweaty curls plush against your bare shoulder. you’re both panting, spent, basking in the moment of silence.

“thank you.” he whispers, sealing it with a kiss against your neck. it tingles, a foreign feeling settling in your belly, shooting through your veins. 

“you drove really well.” you reply, quiet. his breathing halts, a self deprecating laugh filling the room. 

“don’t do that.” 

“what?” 

“act like you were watching my race. charles have a great drive, that must have been a lot more interesting.” 

“maybe, but i was watching you.” 

your words hit him hard. he can’t help but kiss you. you swallow a moan, and a whole heap of feelings that you’re too scared to tackle. 

“you better go. will i see you in brazil?” 

“yeah, lando. you will.” 

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liked by: alexandrasaintmleux, landonorris, charles_leclerc and others

youruser: hola chica 🤭

francisa.cgomes: my love my loveeeee

user21: once again i am asking. why are you here lando? 👀

user56: stop inventing!

alexandrasaintmleux: my beautiful girlies

user66: icon mother slay incredible

-

PART TWO IS HERE!

taglist

@boysthatgovroomvroom @welld0nebaku @thegirlinthefandoms @mcmuppet @japanesekel @vinvantae @ggaslyp1 @dr3lover @smiithys  @rachstash @infinitebells @fizzpopsnap101 @gaily19 @icecoldtires @mysticalnightenthusiast @thatchickwiththecamera @oyesmendes @disneydaydreameralways @canyouseethesainz @ferrarifwendvale @fcbformulaeri @tony-stank3 @maih23 @soleilgrec @carolineworld @anthonykatebridgerton @allywthsr @iamasimpingh0e @ophcelia @lovelynikol16 @coffeehurricanes @jennx03 @blueflorals @lqvesoph @sidcrosbyspuck @better-dead-than-smeg @buendiabebeta @pjofics @kovalcin @wintergilmore3 @for-writing-shit @youdontknowmeshh @im-an-overthinker @jule239

[prakashravi9358]

Le Random.

[lewisvinga]

skyfall | max verstappen x reader!

summary; when once again abu dhabi was the decider for the world championship, but this time it was between ex lovers.

warning; angst 😝

word count; 1.3k

note; skyfall by adele is so good , but there might be typos idk

masterlist !

Abu Dhabi 2023. A race Y/n has been looking forward to since the start of the season. Although her season had a bit of a rough start, the McLaren driver shocked the world. After ending below P10 in the first few races, Y/n pushed through and started winning races, quickly catching up points wise to a certain Red Bull river.

Max Verstappen.

What once was the perfect depiction of young love quickly turned into an intense rivalry. They were young and in love, but they were too focused on their career. With Max’s anger issues, and Y/n’s stubbornness, their relationship ended horribly.

It ended to horribly that the other drivers had to make sure they weren’t together. During media duties and post and pre race interviews, they had to make sure that Y/n and Max weren’t near each other. And if they ever were near each other, it was living hell for everyone on the grid.

It didn’t help the fact that they were currently tied in points for the World Championship. For Max, it’d be his 3rd, but for y/n? She’d do anything to become the first female Formula One driver to be the champion of the world.

The weekend started off tense in the McLaren and Red Bull garages. It was so tense that Lando and Sergio had come up with multiple plans to try to avoid the garages.

Next came qualifying, which went exceptional for Max as usual. For the McLaren driver, it didn’t turn out so well. Ending up at P8. y/n felt sick to her stomach. Not the type of sick from being so nervous, but the type of sick where she was so angry and struggled to contain it.

It just seemed like luck wasn’t on her side as she finished at P8. However, she knew she’d do anything to make it out on top on Sunday.

Lando avoided her like the plague on Sunday. As much as he loved his teammate and enjoyed being around her, he knew that it was no time to joke around. The other McLaren workers copied his strategy. They knew one wrong thing could set Y/n off and they did not want to risk her losing.

The young Brit told her good luck and gave her a quick hug which she didn’t want to admit that she needed. As y/n makes her way to her car, she sees Max stood by his car and glancing at her. They both swore a sudden bitter taste filled their mouth as they made eye contact. They knew this race will ruin anything they ever had and anything they could ever try to have.

Y/n takes a deep slow breath once she was finally at her spot of P8, waiting for the green light to go. It felt like time was moving insanely slow as she sees the red lights slowly go off before it finally turned green.

The start of the race was tame with Max keeping his place of P1 in the first few laps. Y/n managed to take over Charles and Lando, giving her the place of P6 in the beginning. She wasn’t satisfied with it. Of course, she couldn’t be. There were still 5 more drivers she needed to overtake in order to be first.

Y/n soon catches up to George and she easily overtakes him and Carlos soon after. Lewis was a bit of a challenge. He’s a 7x champion of the world and an experienced driver. Nonetheless, Y/n drove past him, placing herself in P3.

She was behind the two Red Bull drivers. Sergio was at least close to her but Max already had a bit of time ahead of his teammate. She was so close when suddenly heard a voice.

“Y/n, we’re gonna need you to box.”

“What?” She loudly exclaims, “No, I’m so close to taking him over. Why?” She continues, starting to get frustrated.

“Now, y/n. We don’t want to risk anything by doing it later.”

Y/n felt furious but she listened. She knew she had to push herself in order to pass Max. By the time she made it back on track, she was at P5. Luckily for her, she was a fantastic driver and in no time she made it back to P2.

Max was still 15 seconds ahead of her. He felt satisfied knowing that he was ahead of her. He ignored the strange feeling in the back of his mind that he started to feel. He used to be madly in love with her. She used to be the one who could make him smile and laugh with a simple joke. She was the one who he could go to after getting into an argument with his father.

Sometimes it shocked him how badly their seemingly perfect relationship ended.

It shocked him enough to be distracted until he realized that y/n was right behind him. He was getting yelled at through his radio to focus and get farther ahead so he can box.

He managed to gain speed and lengthen the time between them. But he could only keep it up for so long until his tires had to be changed. Despite Red Bull being quick at changing the tires, Y/n immediately took P1.

Once Max was back on track, it was like a war between the two. A minute later, he’d be in first, the next minute, y/n would take his place. The gap between the two of them and the rest of the drivers was large. They didn’t have to worry about someone else potentially taking their place.

The last lap was like a war. Everyone watched intensely they drove pretty much side by side. It was difficult to figure out who was ahead and who wasn’t.

Y/n glances at Max, only to see him looking back at her. Filled with hurt and anger from their past relationship, she pushed through on the last turn. She could see the checkered flag in the distance. The same flag she had been dreaming about throughout the week. She accelerated, gaining a second ahead of Max.

Time passed by slowly as she finally passes the waving checkered flag.

“Y/n L/n, you are champion of the world.”

Shock and disbelief filled Y/n’s body. Months of sacrifice and spending the last hour fighting for her spot was all worth it. It felt like she was on cloud nine as she parks the car in her designated spot and quickly gets out to celebrate with her teammate and her team.

Joy and ecstasy was all she felt as she made her into the cooldown room. Sergio, who placed third, gave her a tight hug to congratulate her.

“Felicidades, chiquita.” [congratulations, little one] Sergio says in a soft tone, pulling her into a tight hug. Despite being Max’s teammate, he always cared deeply for her.

Y/n lets out a chuckle as she wraps her arms around him. “Gracias, Checo.” [thank you, checo] she responds as they both pull away and take sit down at their designated seats.

The air in the cooldown became thick as a certain Dutch player made his way inside. Sergio awkwardly coughs as he turns away, wanting nothing more than to leave the room. Max and Y/n knew that there were camera’s recording which meant if they didn’t want to give their PR team a headache, they had to be civil.

Y/n gets a flashback of their relationship. Oh, how younger her would’ve loved to scream and run into his arms. Younger him would’ve kissed her from the joy and pride he would’ve been feeling.

They would’ve been celebrating on the podium together, proud of their journey. They would’ve been partying together to celebrate the end of a fantastic season. They would’ve gone home together and spend the rest of their week relaxing. They would’ve been the perfect couple.

But one argument let the sky fall and made their once seemingly perfect love, crumble.

[harmonicabisexuals]

i can’t imagine being damon albarn in 1995. you’re bopping along happily stoking a fun little britpop rivalry with oasis. you have your adele/beyoncé moment at the brit awards when you say you wish you could split your award with them. and then noel gallagher says he wishes you would catch AIDS and die 😐

[lovecanyon]

EXES TO LOVERS INSTAGRAM BLURB

harry styles x reader

MASTERLIST | PATREON

-

liked by kidharpoon, annetwist and 4,903,146 others

yourinstagram MYYY ALBUM IS OFFICIALLY OUT NOW!!! WHAT A YEAR ❤️

view all comments

ynfan8 i just fell on my knees

harryfan10 SHE IS SO MOTHER

harrystyles Such a brilliant album, I love it. Congratulations.

yourinstagram ❤️

ynfan5 WHAT IS HARRY DOING HERE 😭

harryfan7 harry being a supportive ex…we love to see it!!

alexachung literally album of the year

ynfan4 y/n came to us when we needed her the most 🧎‍♀️

adele streaming as we speak 💖

harryfan6 harry commenting…he’s so messy omg

gemmastyles i swear you are too talented y/nnnn!

yourinstagram love and miss you gem

ynfan3 UMMMM

liked by harryfan11, ynfan13 and 202,815 others

enews Harry Styles congratulated ex Y/N L/N on her new album recently. The two began to trend on social media leading fans to believe that they could get back together. Both singers refused to confirm nor comment on this situation.

view all comments

harryfan17 leave my parents alone!

ynfan14 can’t harry congratulate y/n in peace 🫣

harryfan19 right, nonetheless they are still friends……

ynfan12 harry’s house being about y/n…my 21st century blues being about harry 🤯

harryfan15 i’m sorry but they were such a hot couple

ynfan18 predicting exes to lovers…

harryfan20 can you guys just let them live in peace, they literally just broke up last year

ynfan22 something is screaming inside of me

harryfan16 HARRY HAS ALWAYS SUPPORTED HIS EXES

ynfan25 the earth is finally healing

harryfan21 anyways stream escapism!!!

ynfan23 don’t let me get me hopes up 🫠

liked by harrystyles, columbiarecords and 308,511 others

kidharpoon My 21st Century Blues, one of my favorite albums I produced.

view all comments

harryfan24 I AM GOING INSANE

ynfan26 isn’t this harry’s producer too 😭

yourinstagram love ya kid!

|| kidharpoon ❤️❤️

harryfan28 i’m for sure not sleeping tonight

mitchrowland honestly the best album yet

ynfan27 Y/N DESERVES A GRAMMY FOR CREATING THIS ALBUM

jefezoff two talented people

harryfan30 i am so in love with her

pillowpersonpp congratulations, so happy for you both!

ynfan29 this album doesn't have one skip on it 😩

harrystyles Beauty and talent.

harryfan31 I AM SCREAMING…WHAT

liked by yourinstagram, harrystyles and 772,300 others

columbiarecords Y/N L/N’s album “My 21st Century Blues” rises on the Billboard Hot 100 this week.

view all comments

ynfan32 I KNOW THAT’S RIGHT

harryfan36 y/n supremacy 😌

yourinstagram i’m not crying

ynfan38 she deserves this so much omg 😭

kidharpoon this really is the best year ever and it’s barely february!!

harryfan33 i love this for y/n

gemmastyles so proud and happy ❤️

ynfan35 ALBUM OF THE YEAR. ALBUM OF THE YEAR. ALBUM OF THE YEAR.

arianagrande her album has me in a chokehold…

harryfan39 y/n needs every award there is for making this album

paulithepsm why is this the best news ever!?!?

ynfan34 all i can say is this was so deserved

liked by harryfan40, ynfan43 and 183,709 others

harryflorals HARRY ON THE BRITS RED CARPET!

view all comments

harryfan41 i am now officially dead

ynfan45 HE CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH THIS

harryfan46 harry’s back has to hurt from constantly carrying the best dressed title 😌

ynfan48 arrived to sweep the brits

harryfan42 first the grammys and now this…

ynfan44 harry can run me over, stomp on me..and i wouldn’t care

harryfan47 on my hands and knees

ynfan49 i mean who wouldn’t write an album about harry…

harryfan51 HE KEEPS ON SLAYING

ynfan53 committing arson

harryfan55 i want to be his housewife 🫣

liked by harrystyles, jefezoff and 984,527 others

gemmastyles Gals at the Brits

view all comments

ynfan50 Y/N IS THERE???

harryfan54 omg our parents are being reunited tonight, nobody talk to me

yourinstagram i missed you gem

gemmastyles well i missed you more sweetheart ❤️❤️

ynfan58 omg i’m sobbing

pillowpersonpp having the best time!!!

harryfan60 Y/N AND HARRY ARE SITTING AT THE SAME TABLE…SHUT UP

anthonypham one of the best brits so far

ynfan56 stop this or i will jump into conclusions 😭

kidharpoon love spending time with family!

harryfan59 I LOVE IT HERE

liked by ynfan61, harryfan64 and 361,479 others

ynupdates Y/N GAVE A SURPRISE PERFORMANCE AT THE BRITS TONIGHT

view all comments

ynfan63 her outfit is giving harry 😩

harryfan69 BEST PERFORMANCE AT THE BRITS…SORRY NOT SORRY

ynfan65 ate up harry and left no crumbs behind…

harryfan62 you can just tell y/n just borrowed an outfit from harry’s closet

ynfan66 she’s going to make me go insane

harryfan68 OBSESSED WITH HER

ynfan70 y/n is so talented

harryfan67 harry was dancing during her performance too 🫠

ynfan72 the best surprise ever

harryfan74 the way y/n’s outfit was designed by harry lambert 😭 it’s so obvious

liked by yourinstagram, harrystyles and 513,470 others

harry_lambert Brits 2023!

Wearing @ ninaricci 💕

view all comments

ynfan71 THE MOST GORGEOUS GIRL IN THE WORLD

harryfan73 i am going crazy over her

harrystyles My beautiful angel.

ynfan75 parenthesis on “my” 🫠

harryfan78 BOOM. CRASH. SLAM.

gemmastyles y/n is so perfect!!

ynfan76 2023 has been the best year for harry and y/n fans 😌

_basselin i couldn’t stop looking at her last night

pillowpersonpp i thought i was the only one…

harryfan79 PLEASE I LOVE THEM

emmalouisecorrin drop dead gorgeous!!!

ynfan80 harry’s comment has me shaking 😭

liked by harryfan84, ynfan86 and 238,311 others

thesun Y/N L/N and Harry Styles both attended a Brits after party last night in London and even left together in the same vehicle.

view all comments

harryfan81 UMMM WHAT

ynfan85 i actually manifested this!

harryfan88 sleeping on the highway tonight 🧎‍♀️

ynfan82 well we all knew this was coming

harryfan89 right when harry commented on y/n’s post…i knew something was going to happen 😭

ynfan83 mother and father 🙏

harryfan88 kid harpoon most definitely got them back together

ynfan87 why has this been the best year yet

harryfan90 can they just get married already?

ynfan92 y/n and harry need to pull a sarah and mitch…and get married secretly

liked by harrystyles, jefezoff and 4,120,385 others

yourinstagram my album has only been out for three weeks and already i’ve received so much love! this is such an overwhelming feeling, i love you all ❤️❤️

view all comments

harryfan91 OMG SHE DESERVES EVERYTHING

ynfan93 why do i feel like a proud mother

harrystyles Baby, I love you so much!

yourinstagram i love you garry

harryfan95 NOT GARRY 😭

ynfan97 did this just confirm that they got back together…

kidharpoon you, garry and i make such a good team

harryfan94 i love y/n so much 🥹

annetwist congratulations on your new achievements darling!!

ynfan96 i’m crying with her

colombiarecords our queen 💕

liked by yourinstagram, gemmastyles and 6,830,174 others

harrystyles Morning after The Brits and I couldn’t be happier.

view all comments

harryfan102 this left me speechless

ynfan105 I WANT TO BE HARRY SO BAD 😭

yourinstagram I love you my sweet boy.

harrystyles And your sweet boy loves you.

harryfan108 this has me in shambles 💔

ynfan104 “sweet boy” can someone please run me over

emmalouisecorrin a goddess!!!

harryfan101 after seeing this…i don’t even want harry anymore…i want y/n

harry_lambert this just blew me away

ynfan109 HARRY IS SO INSANE FOR THIS

jefezoff love you two lovebirds 💖

harryfan106 y/n is the only woman ever!

-

tag list: @harrysmatcha @harryspinkpillow @helen-with-an-a @florencepughily @peterparkerbae @toji-dabi-wife @fallonx @drphilssoulmate @cherriesrae @alienorknight @valluvsu @ayeshathestyles @hazgoldenstyles @eiffelmezarry @tsukishimawhore @renatavieira @michellekstyles @eleanordaisy @shawnsblue @agustdpeach @hannahnikohl @whoscamila @ch3rryrry @msolbesg @seguin-styles1996 @futuristicpalacegardenpsychic @youusunshineyoutemptress @kaitieskidmore1 @cherryfragrancx @ssuziess @milkiane @golden-hoax @flwrmuse @sunshinemendes8 @your--sweetest--downfall @melllinaa @tenaciousperfectionunknown @cashtons-wife @stellarossii @scenesofobx @manifestrry @lomlolivia @b-reads-things

[foxes-that-run]

https://x.com/erodalighthouse/status/1860862311830823179?t=9bAYbirsdaUQhKPjN-8D4A&s=19

What does this mean????? Is it original or some song or some poem??????

It’s original I think, posted at 1:45am London time.

Dean and Old Compton is in London SoHo, on that corner is:

The Groucho Club which is a private members club that Harry went to *a lot* in 2012-2013, usually with Nick Grimshaw. It’s also where Taylor went with Tom O’Dell after the 2013 Brit awards which Harry was also at. Harry was there a week before it seemed to be a favourite of his at the time so... interesting.

More likely is the Dean Street Studio - Bowie recorded there as well as Florence and Adele who worked with Kid Harpoon on those records. When Harry, Tyler and Kid were photographed in SoHo in October 2023 they were a 6 minute walk from that studio.

The silhouette stands out to me too, it reminds me of “she sits beside me like a silhouette. Hard candy dripping on me till my feet are wet”

[0oolookitsme]

Flower Goes Floral

Type- Fake Insta ;)

Verse- Model!Harry x Fashion Designer!Y/n

Warnings- None, just fluff <3

Description- Harry at the Brits, wearing an iconic dress suit, styled by none other than his girlfriend, Y/n.

A/n- I want to post slightly regularly this year, and because I'm busy writing a few other fics which I'm yet to finish, here's a small fake ig for y'all. Hope you like it! <3

Liked by Masaba, AnthonyPham and others

Y/Ig/n Harry Styles (aka my partner), wearing a custom Gucci Black Peplum Blazer and an oversized flower blazer. Both were designed and styled by me, yours one and only.

View all 2,19,534 comments

HsFan1 I just KNOW that he was absolutely THRILLED to wear this

Masaba No lies I'd be smug too if I had designed this

↳Y/Ig/N There's no bigger fan of you than me. Thank you very much, this has altered my life.

HarryStyles Looking like a devil, aren't I?

↳HarryFan0 WHO PUT THAT IN HIS MIND ↳MitchRowland I beg your pardon, @HarryFan0. I had meant it as a joke.

Y/nFan1 Both of them ATE and left no crumbs.

Y/nFan2 Can we talk about how surreally she said 'aka my partner' in the brackets??

Liked by Zayn, TaylorFan1 and -others

HarryStyles Thank you for having me tonight, @/Brits. I had an amazing time wearing both of my outfits, styled by the icon, @Y/Ig/N.

View all 19,278,865 comments

TaylorFan1 Alexa? Play Gorgeous by Taylor Swift.

Y/Ig/n Why, thank you, Darling.

ConanGray Please I'm ready to sell you my hair just collaborate with me too

↳Y/Ig/N What you want me to spoil the surprise, don't you? ↳ConanFan1 A Y/N AND CONAN COLLAB?!?!? WHY IS EVERYONE SLEEPING ON THIS OMFG I'M FREAKING OUT

KatyPerry Looking just like the charming man you always do

Y/nFan16 She really said watch my flower go floral

Liked by Lizzo, Adele and -others

Y/Ig/n Happy Valentine's Day, @HarryStyles. You truly are a devil in disguise.

View all 25,316,964 comments

Lizzo *Heart-shaped eyes (towards the pizza)*

Y/nFan2 THEY MADE THAT CUP TOGETHER DO NO TELL ME OTHERWISE

Y/nFan5 lmaoo not her bashing him through his own comment

HarryStyles Happy Valentine's Day, lover

Y/nFan11 I love them sm it hurts ...but in like- a cool way ;)

Liked by NiallHoran, TaylorSwift and -others

HarryStyles I have no idea what I would wear without you, @Y/Ig/n (and your lovely team too). Thank you for agreeing to go out for a glass of wine with me on that already industrious and bustling day. And oh, Happy Valentine's Day.

View all 28,305,567 comments

Y/nforeva This woman never rests, does she?

GemmaStyles Exactly. Thank you for agreeing, @Y/Ig/N

Y/Ig/n Literally one of the best nights in my life.

↳HarryStyles I agree ;)

JamesCordon You two are disgustingly in love

Liked by HarryFan02, Y/nforeva and -others

HarryY/nAlways Happy Valentine's Day to THE BEST COUPLE in the whole industry. (Y/n uploaded these on her ig stories with the caption 'Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips.' Exactly. A Hozier song. Goodbye.)

View all 95,64,589 comments

Y/nFan3 She IS goofy, she just doesn't show that side of hers on the camera that often.

Anne Best Duo!

Y/nFan5 No way is gonna have a vase big enough to fit all those roses in but then again, she's THE @Y/Ig/N

HarryFan1 He is SO Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!!!!!

YourMum These two never fail to make me smile. Just imagine the sunburn on their cheeks because they are so careless and in love.

↳Y/nforeva Y/n's mum literally loves them so much, it's ADORABLE

[daisiesonafield-blog]

Hi Daisie,

do you know if any of your followers has access to the full article?

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/music/news/harry-styles-album-year-grammys-speech-beyonce-white-privilege/

This doesn’t happen to people like me very often.” So said 29-year-old Harry Styles, accepting his Grammy Award for Album of the Year on Sunday night. Most normal people assumed that by “people”, Styles meant a boy born outside of Birmingham and brought up in between Crewe and Manchester, far from the bright lights of London and the Brit School. But the internet is not full of normal people, and outrage ensued, as critics claimed that Styles was ignoring his white privilege – and, worse, having a pop at Beyoncé.

Styles also drew ire by arguing that “there’s no such thing as ‘best’ in music”, and refusing to say that he thought Beyoncé would win, instead saying merely that “you never know with this stuff”. The critics didn’t hold back. “‘This doesn’t happen to people like me’,” wrote the American podcaster Sam Sanders, “is the most white privilege-iest thing to ever be uttered at an awards show ever for all time [sic].” “Beyoncé continues to be boycotted, without AOTY [Album of the Year] and used as a token to disguise the Academy’s racism,” complained the pop-culture website Pop Tingz. 

Styles may have had a wobbly night – not least because the turnstile on which his dance number was meant to be performed rotated in the wrong direction – but an attack on “Queen B” this was not. To most Britons, Styles’s accent is the clue that he’s different from many a young London silver-spoon star; yet this subtlety is almost entirely lost on Americans. True, that Cheshire accent has been muddied by his recent attempt at a transatlantic twang while filming Don’t Worry Darling. 

And having a finance director for a father hardly puts you in league with British pop’s history of working-class heroes, from The Beatles to Oasis. Yet these days the industry has changed, and Styles is quite clearly different to the likes of Florence Welch or Marcus Mumford, who seem to fit into the world of fame as if they were born to it.

We’ve been here before. In 2019, when Sam Fender, born in North Shields, dared to explain why “white privilege” sounded like a difficult concept to the white men with whom he grew up, he was labelled tone-deaf and racist. This is the success of the “white privilege” label: admit it and you’re damned, deny it and you’re deluded. But in importing a particularly American brand of racial politics, discussion about success within the British arts only becomes skewed. 

Unlike in the States, class is a greater defining factor of success in Britain than race or gender are – a fact that many commentators seem to want to forget. “The debate raging online about where Styles sits on the class spectrum is a fascinating insight into Britain’s class obsession,” wrote one writer in The Guardian. That sound you can hear is a nation of working-class music-lovers choking on their own scorn.

Styles, in truth, is both right and wrong. Poor boys and girls have often made it to the top, though often that has been on account of the sheer tenacity of their talent. Barry Keoghan is currently flavour of the month in Ireland for his performance in Martin McDonagh’s film The Banshees of Inisherin, despite his extremely tough and poverty-stricken upbringing, which involved going in and out of the care system. 

Bands have often capitalised on class difference, too – admitting whether you were an Oasis or a Blur fan was as much a class signifier as the tea-vs-supper debate, and it did neither band any commercial harm. Some fans have also pointed out, amusingly, that Adele, who was also up for Album of the Year at the Grammys, was born and raised in Tottenham.

A working-class hero Harry Styles may not entirely be, but he certainly isn’t a white-privilege villain either. And we would all do well to remember that awards ceremonies, and the speeches made at them, may be full of glitz and glamour, but they bear little relevance to the politics of the real world – or to the real people who live out there.

Full article. Link here. No paywall link.

[cherry-cola-on-ice]

Norman bates, Thomas Hewitt, brahms heelshire, billy lenz (anyone else) reaction to reader blasting rap/pop music

“I SAID CERTIFIED FREAK SEVEN DAY A WEEK WET ASS PUSSY MAKE THAT PULL OUT GAME WEAK-“

“🤭😊😁😆😀😥😰😨”

To say Norman was alarmed is a understatement. His sweet little lover has been playing some...interesting??? music lately. Of course he'd never say anything, as long as you are happy he's happy. But mother has some complaints (doesn't she always?) so it might cause some contention between the two of you. But eventually she'll come around. The song is too on point for her not to

Oh, Thomas. Our sweet backwoods bby. If it ain't gotta a banjo in it, is it really music? But when he hears you blasting this song, tears in your eyes, he's sold. This is it. This is your song now. Your first dance at your 'wedding'. Be prepared to have this song played everyday day. And don't pay no attention to Hoyt, he isn't crying. Just cutting onions.

I'm sorry, is this too on the nose? Just because Brahms is a brit, doesn't mean that he automatically loves Adele. I mean, he does love Adele's music. Especially this one. His over-dramatic ass, catch him in the kitchen at 3am, clutching a bottle of wine and sobbing. Honestly, you just played it once for the meme. And now here we are 🤷🏼‍♀️

Billy Lenz is that human version of that feral dog that won't stop humping your leg. So you? Playing this song? Innocently singing along? Oh, boy. You're in for a long night. Also, not Billy stealing your phone to look up the music video... AND SOMEHOW MEMORIZEING THE ENTIRE CHOREOGRAPHY. Like damn asshole can't remember to wash his crack, but remembers the dance from WAP.

[louthesawgirl]

Saw Come Dancing- Round 2!

Due to the result of the first vote, STEVEN SING is the first character eliminated after his debut salsa performance.

Here’s the next vote, remember you’re voting for your fave and the character with the least votes is eliminated.

Song choices:

1. Lindsey- Waltz: “If I Ain’t Got You”- Alicia Keys

2. Adam- Cha Cha Cha: “Apple”- Charli XCX

3. Cecilia- Quickstep: “Another Day of Sun”- from ‘La La Land’

4. Jill- Samba: “Makeba”- Jain

5. Peter- Paso Doble: “Espana Cani”

6. Daniel- Jive: “Runaway Baby”- Bruno Mars

7. Lawrence- Viennese Waltz: “That’s Life”- Frank Sinatra

8. Simone- Tango: “Rumour Has It”- Adele

9. Brit- Salsa: “Tell It To My Heart”- Taylor Dayne

10. Mark- Quickstep: “Lust For Life”- Iggy Pop

11. Amanda- Cha Cha Cha: “Venus”- Shocking Blue

[the-offside-rule]

Jude Bellingham (Borussia Dortmund) - When We Were Young

Requested: tumblr

Prompts: "When We Were Young - Adele

Warnings: bit of angst here and there

*IF YOU DONT WANNA READ IT, DONT! DONT COMPLAIN IN MY ASK BOX, OR DMS ABOUT WHY I SHOULD NOT BE WRITING THIS CHILL*

"Why are we here again?" Jude asked as his friend Y/n led him into the library she usually went to in Dortmund. "Were here to buy clothes. Why the hell do you think we're here?" She replied. "No need to be like that. Just asking." Jude mumbled. "I wasn't being like anything. You're just being in a mood as per usual." It wasnt a usual thing. He was in a mood because of his recent breakup eith his last girlfriend of four years. He loved her and he thought they'd be end game, but it wasn't meant to be he supposed. "I'm not in a mood." Jude muttered. "You are. You very much are in a mood."

"Can you just be quick and pick something so we can go?" He asked, his hand clenched in his pockets. "I know what book I need so settle your knickers." She said. "I hope I see someone I know. Means I could sit and talk and annoy you more." Jude gave a sarcastic smile to that statement. "I hope you do too. That way I can go get the bus home and not have you annoying me." She slapped his arm and continued walking. She grabbed the book She needed for college, scanned her library card so she could borrow it and left with her moody teenager of a friend trailing behind her.

"Right, in the car." She said, throwing the book into the back. Y/n looked over to Jude, his face half covered by his jumper and hood, while his hands were shoved into his pockets. "Do you want me to open the door or what?" She asked. "I said I'm getting the bus." He replied. "Get in the car." She repeated. Not a move. "Jude, in the car." He shook his head. "I'm getting the bus."

"Jude! Get in the fucking car! I'm not having this today!" Jude looked at her angrily but quick got into her car, slamming the door behind him. Y/n got in shortly after and looked over worried as he fumbled with his seat belt. "Are you alright?" She asked. "Yeah, just drive." He replied as he clicked his seatbelt into place. She let out an agitated sigh and started her car, beginning to drive. The silence was almost ghostly. The atmosphere was cold and there was a sense of tension. "Right I'm putting on the radio." She said, breaking the silence. Jude on the other hand, didn't say anything. He folded his arms and looked out the window at the grey skies and people walking by in raincoats. "Oh my god, I love this song!" She exclaimed, catching the young brit by surprise.

"And all the girls dream that they'd be your partner, they'd be your partner and-" She turned to her friend in the passenger side. "You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you." She sang it passionately. A grin appeared on Judes face as he looked over amused as to why she was singing. "How is this helping me get over my breakup?" Jude asked. "Are you smiling?" He felt his cheeks heat up before he turned and looked out the window. "Oh come on! You'll be fine! She was a cunt anyway." She said. "Not to me she wasn't. Maybe she just didn't like you because she thought you'd steal me away." He said sarcastically. "Imagine. That's fucking stupid. You're not the footballer I'd get with." Jude rolled his eyes. "For the last time, I don't know Pedri or Gavi personally."

"All you'd need to do is shoot them a text on Instagram. That should do the trick Jude! I'd do the same for you!" Jude scoffed. "As if I'd need your help in getting a girlfriend." He replied. "Who's freshly single again?" His lips pressed together inot a flat light, showing his disapproval of her last question. "You've been single longer though." He said smiling over towards her. "Yeah because I choose to be single. You've no choice at the moment." The smile slightly faded. "I did have a girlfriend though." The melancholic feeling set back in as he found himself upset over the breakup yet again. Y/n glanced over to Jude, seeing him sulking again. There was a silence filling the car, a very, very sad silence. "If its any consolation they worst thing she could do is go to Barcelona and fuck Gavi." Jude chuckled and nodded. "Chances of that are slim." He said. "But never zero." She added. "Why did Gavi even come into this conversation? I know you think he's fit but fuck sake." Jude laughed. "I'm right though. He's Spanish, young and oh my god did I mention he's a golden boy?"

"You might've done, yeah." He smiled. "You look so down Jude. I didn't know she meant that much to you." She said. "She did. I liked her a lot." He swallowed the lump in his throat. "But it's over. Doesn't matter anyway." The silence grew in the car once again. "I just liked her is all." Jude repeated again and again. "More than cake pops?" His face scrunched as he thought to himself. "I wouldn't say so, no." The pair laughed together at the answer. "So why don't we just get cake pops, drive around the city and throw on a breakup album?"

"Is this breakup album just Taylor Swift as usual?" He asked. "What else would it be?" She chuckled. "Alright then. We'll do that." After a couple of minutes, she parked and grabbed her purse to get out. "Alright, I'll be back in a sec. Do you want the chocolate ones still? Because they've got white chocolate and raspberry now too." She asked. "Just grab whichever ones. I don't mind." He said. "Alright, be back in a sec."

"Y/n?"

She looked back to a much happier Jude than before. It was almost as though he just got whatever he needed to say and it was a weight off his shoulders. "Thank you." He said. "I'm only buying you cake pops, it's not that deep lad." She joked. "Oh don't be daft! You know what I mean." She nodded and smiled back. "Don't mention it. I'll always be here if you need to talk." She said closing the door. He watched her carefully as she crossed the road into her favourite bakery before he whipped out his phone and opened the matte phone case over his phone to reveal a small faded photo of two kids together. Little did they know back then, that their friendship would lead to getting cakepops as roommates in Dortmund, with plans to listen to Taylor Swift albums until one gets over their breakup, while the other sings and dedicates the love songs to him secretly.

[haveyoulistenedtothisalbum-poll]

Spotify Tracklist below the cut due to length.

0.002 • Nobody Makes Money Anymore • Stephen Chicken • How Many Friends Have You Bought In Your Unsigned Band • 2 be or not to be • I'm In With The Soundcloud • 2 noble kinsmen • Johnny Ramone Joins The Beatles • Mojo Mojo Why Don't You Go And Review This Album Instead Of Another REM Blowjo • Noel Gallagher Is Jealous Of My Studio • My Royalty Statement • YouTube Are Fleecing You • I Wanna Be The New Ed Sheeran • Happy (Un) • Drop That Bridge Like Taylor Swift • The Great Sync Deal In The Sky • Liam Gallagher Is Jealous Of My Clever Turn Of Phrase • Dappy Versus Zombies vs The Pocket Gods • NME NME You're History • Nobody Makes Any Money Anymore • Adele • EMI • Synch • Steve Blacknell's Near Fatal Asthma Attack • Best Of Joe Rogan • Rock N Roll • Modern Music Is Boring Me • Mariah The Pariah • All About The Bass & Not Being Paid A Fair Amount • Neil • We Love Gideon Coe • 0.007 • the bbc will introduce you as long as you're under 25 • this is the end of the music business • Nowhere Left To Play • The Orchard Versus Sony • 6 Music Is The New Radio 1 • youtube are fleecing you outro • we don't need another nero • tory wet dream • Stars On MP3 • Racist Seaside Town They Forgot To Close Down • Starbuckers • Corporation Lax • Grotify • Brexiteers of The World Unite (ironically) • Penny Arcade Jukebox Scam • The Weak Spine Of Mr Cameron • Exit Brexit For Xmas • I Hate Hipsters • Ballad Of The Lonely Fruit Picker • Absent Smelly Stick Your Pay To Play Up Your Bottom • Shazam Kazam It's All A Mystery To Me • Peter Doherty's Quest For A Mythical Albion • Deezer Geezer • Brown Nose Brexit • A&R Pervert Man • Steve Jobs • Why Did I Write This Album With 1000 Songs On Now I have No Social Life • Shoddy Waddy • Best Of Boris Johnson • Pusher • Disinformate the Disinformators • Radio 2 Is Cool • It's The Brits • Lawyer V Liar • blah blah the music industry ceo goes • Folsom Prison Jism • The Forumla To Work Out My Royalties Is More Complicated Than The Superstring Theory Of Everything • Country Chaos • 45 Rip • John Peel's On The Phone • Another Generic Pop Song • Cesspool Karaoke • Bait Oven • Lucy Fux Cowell • Precious Electro Pop Indie Band Change The World • Minceyments • Zx Spectrum Soundtrack • Why Did I Write This Album With 1000 Songs On Now I have No Wife • Alan Mghee and the Pink Raincoat • The Monkees Gave Good Head • Michael Jackson Vs The illumati • The Sound Of The Future AI Bot • Mac Book Ho • Shabby Road • I.will.Iam Shakespeare • Feed Me Seymour • Auto Tune Loon • Reality TV Killed The Video Star • Madame Jo Jo's • Modern Music Is Boring Me • Small Town Musos • Medusa • Pledge • Ex Tractor • Jarvis Said Send Me Your Christmas Album • I'm A D List St Albans' Musician Get ME Out Of Here • Santasucker • Who Knows Who The F*ck Is Number 1? • Joe Meek • Pay To Play • Dodgy London Promoter • He's A Local Music Star • You Can't Shoplift MP3s • 2nd Biggest Band In The Village • Tedious day Job Rescue me me universe • The End Of The Mean Times )LOA) • The End Of The Pocket Gods? • Odd one out (just for the cd remember them?) • Premier • 2016 • 2379 • A Fool On The chill • Ac • Ag • Living On Top Of A Porno Cinema • ahura mazda • Al • White Noise Christmas • Albany • Alexi (not Sanchez) Put The Grunge Into Soccer! • all in all it's just another prick in the wall • All Things Must Pass • all you need is love and money • Always Look On The Norman Whiteside Of Life • Am • And Your Bird Can Sing • ANOTHER BLING FOOTBALLER • Another Blue Plaque • Another clown on the ground rolling around • APOCRYPHA • A&R Talking • Watch Out Lockdown is Coming • As • When BJ Apologies All I Hear Is This • Au • AVATAR • Sue's Redacted Report • Silence (sound of lockdown) with Tinnitus • ballad of blackfriars tavern • ballad of the lonely people again • Banksies dodgy beer • Bard For Life • Bard Rock Cafe • Bardify • Be • Beatles Wives Can't Sing • Beatles On A Tinny Tannoy (Ode to Shay) • Beatles On Spotify • BEST player not have played at a World Cup

Best Tattoo • better part of valour • Better Than The Stones • Beware The IDS of March • Bi • Big Willie Style • Bigger Than Jesus…but Jesus Never Toured (the US) • Bight the Apple That Feeds • billy fury • Billy Preston (was the 5th beatle) • Spent Too Long Watching Get Back • Blind Hope • blisters on my fingers • Bond Girl • Bono Is Bigger Than The Beatles • Br • dead tod • bring me the head of francis bacon • Bud Miser • Had Enougth Of Politics • C • Ca • Cardenio • Cathrine • What Party? • I wasn't there honest guv • Deffo A Work Event • Christ as Stoichkov • christmas in cricklewood • chuck berry we stole his riffs • Church Of Merch • Nothing to See here • Cm • Co • CONTE VERDE • Cornwall • Cr • Crap World Cup Mascot • Cs • cu night twelfth • Cu • Cygnus • Cynthia v Yoko • David Bowie v Shakespeare • day 1 of lockdown oh my god • day 2 of lockdown be good to get our • day 3 of lockdown wtf? • day 4 of lockdown jim jams • day 5 of lockdown call docs • day 6 of lockdown bed head • day 7 of lockdown not getting out of bed • day 8 of lockdown st albans' wine & cheese extravaganza • day 9 of lockdown grateful we don't live in a flat in london • day 10 of lockdown another day • day 11 of lockdown locked out of the playground • day 12 of lockdown thank god for nomansland • day 13 of lockdown project fear being ramped up • day 14 of lockdown 3 word phrases • day 15 of lockdown take away take away • day 16 of lockdown blah • day 17 of lockdown it's like picadilly circus outside my house • day 18 of lockdown slobs days • day 19 of lockdown knock more tracks off • day 20 of lockdown still waiting for my EMDR treatment god what is going on? • day 21 of lockdown phoned the mental health emergency helpline and got cut off after an hour on hold it's pretty desperate • day 22 of lockdown need my freedom need to escape need to get out can't stand being trapped inside (childhood memories) • day 23 of lockdown at least I don't drink anymore though quite tempted to start again • day 24 of lockdown I'm certain that when we look back after the pandemic has finished we will see that lockdowns caused more harm than good • day 25 of lockdown driving to the next village will we get arrested? • day 26 of lockdown another day another walk so glad we live in the country • day 27 of lockdown working at home zoom freak out • day 28 of lockdown not much to say today • day 29 of lockdown got another idea for a world record • day 30 of lockdown is this the right person to be leading us and what is it all really about, still no word on EMDR • day 32 of lockdown not sure what day it is • day 33 of lockdown just keep going and still waiting for Psychiatrist to call • day 34 of lockdown spring is here shall I have an alcohol free beer? • day 35 of lockdown so many 3 word phrases quite frightening • day 36 of lockdown life is now all online what a drag • day 37 of lockdown right said fred are speaking out against lockdown what does it mean • day 38 of lockdown is more tedious than this album • day 39 of lockdown cheese and toast is the new rock n roll • day 40 of lockdown one day hats will be eaten • day 41 of lockdown survived the wicker man • day 42 of lockdown long way to go when will it end • day 43 of lockdown life is an online barbie fashion show • day 44 of lockdown run run run fat boy • day 45 of lockdown May 6th 2020 • day 46 of lockdown I bet they're having parties in Downing Street • day 47 of lockdown there's a reason why this is played in morse code • day 48 of lockdown this is morse code for why don't Spotify and Apple pay us more money • day 49 of lockdown If I Can Get Through Lockdown and finish this album of 1000 tracks then that would mean something • day 50 of lockdown May 11th 2020 • day 51 of lockdown bet there's been another party in Downing Street • day 52 of lockdown anyone still listening? • day 53 of lockdown we're all in this together? • day 54 of lockdown I can't wear a mask it triggers my PTSD what am i to do?

day 55 of lockdown cross it off my bedroom wall and the walrus was paul • day 56 of lockdown gonna have to go off sick can't cope with lockdown and having no treatment • day 57 of lockdown gp signed me off still no sign of EMDR oh well let's go for a walk • day 58 of lockdown no comment today • day 59 of lockdown we are putting our trust in a corrupt government let's all focus on making our own world a better place • day 60 of lockdown hospitality hospitality they've all got it in for hospitality • day 61 of lockdown The Rose And Crown • day 62 of lockdown longing to be back in Kessingland • day 63 of lockdown toast toast toast • day 64 of lockdown taking up metal detecting shame it's illegal in lockdown • day 65 of lockdown does Ed Sheeran fancy a track on this album? • day 66 of lockdown yeah that kind of sucks • day 67 of lockdown Our cat Minty has Pohms and he likes you to smell dem • day 68 of lockdown this album is like a musical filibuster • day 69 of lockdown i used to be a socialist now i just prefer colouring in • day 70 of lockdown ah might be starting my EMDR soon online of course would be nice to do it in person but there you go • day 71 of lockdown spell dem • day 72 of lockdown that's me in the corner • day 73 of lockdown smile and be happy • day 74 of lockdown amazon and on • day 75 of lockdown boot noot • day 76 of lockdown can i just sit it out this great reset thing • day 77 of lockdown june 7th • day 78 of lockdown june 8th 2020 • day 79 of lockdown june 9th 2020 • day 80 of lockdown june 10th 2020. • day 81 of lockdown june 11th 2020 • day 82 of lockdown june 12th 2020 • day 83 of lockdown june 13th 2020 • day 84 of lockdown june 14th 2020 • day 85 of lockdown june 15th 2020 • day 86 of lockdown june 16th 2020 • day 87 of lockdown june 17th 2020 • day 88 of lockdown june 18th 2020 • day 89 of lockdown june 19th 2020 • day 90 of lockdown june 20th 2020 is there another party? • day 91 of lockdown june 21st 2020 i quit! • day 92 of lockdown june 22nd 2020 • day 93 of lockdown june 23rd 2020 • day 94 of lockdown june 24th 2020 i'm 50 should have been playing the 100 club but i'm having fun in the garden pook with the family • day 95 of lockdown june 25th 2020 • day 96 of lockdown june 26th 2020 • day 97 of lockdown june 27th 2020 • day 98 of lockdown june 28th 2020 • day 99 of lockdown june 29th 2020 • day 100 of lockdown june 30th 2020 • day 101 of lockdown july 1st 2020 12 weeks my arse • day 102 of lockdown july 2nd 2020 summer mask implosion • day 103 of lockdown july 3rd 2020 • day 104 of lockdown july 4th 2020 independence day ha! • day 105 of lockdown july 5th 2020 • day 106 of lockdown july 6th 2020 ooh i need your maths babe • day 107 of lockdown july 7th 2020 • day 108 of lockdown july 8th 2020 the cues watch the queues • day 109 of lockdown july 9th 2020 • day 110 of lockdown july 10th 2020 • day 111 of lockdown july 11th 2020 pants • day 112 of lockdown july 12th 2020 • day 113 of lockdown july 13th 2020 only 1/3 way through yikes • day 114 of lockdown july 14th 2020 • day 115 of lockdown july 15th 2020 • day 116 of lockdown july 16th 2020 • day 117 of lockdown july 17th 2020 • day 118 of lockdown july 18th 2020 • day 119 of lockdown july 19th 2020 • day 120 of lockdown july 20th 2020 • day 121 of lockdown july 21st 2020 • day 122 of lockdown july 22nd 2020 • day 123 of lockdown july 23rd 2020 • day 124 of lockdown july 24th 2020 • day 125 of lockdown july 25th 2020 • day 126 of lockdown july 26th 2020.wav • day 127 of lockdown july 27th 2020 • day 128 of lockdown july 28th 2020 • day 129 of lockdown july 29th 2020 • day 130 of lockdown july 30th 2020 • day 131 of lockdown july 31st 2020 • day 132 of lockdown August 1st 2020 • day 133 of lockdown August 2nd 2020 • day 134 of lockdown August 3rd 2020 • day 135 of lockdown August 4th 2020.wav • day 136 of lockdown August 5th 2020 • day 137 of lockdown August 6th 2020 • day 138 of lockdown August 7th 2020 • day 139 of lockdown August 8th 2020

day 140 of lockdown August 9th 2020 • day 141 of lockdown August 10th 2020 • day 142 of lockdown August 11th 2020 • day 143 of lockdown August 12th 2020 • day 144 of lockdown August 13th 2020 • day 145 of lockdown August 14th 2020 • day 146 of lockdown August 15th 2020 • day 147 of lockdown August 16th 2020 time for a pizza party • day 148 of lockdown August 17th 2020 • day 149 of lockdown August 18th 2020.wav • day 150 of lockdown August 19th 2020 ya ya • day 151 of lockdown August 20th 2020 • day 152 of lockdown August 21st 2020 • day 153 of lockdown August 22nd 2020 pass me the port • day 154 of lockdown August 23rd 2020 • day 155 of lockdown August 24th 2020 • day 156 of lockdown August 25th 2020 • day 157 of lockdown August 26th 2020 • day 158 of lockdown August 27th 2020 • day 159 of lockdown August 28th 2020 • day 160 of lockdown August 29th 2020 • day 161 of lockdown August 30th 2020 • day 162 of lockdown August 31st 2020 • day 163 of lockdown September 1st 2020 • day 164 of lockdown September 2nd 2020 • day 165 of lockdown September 3rd 2020 • day 166 of lockdown September 4th 2020 • day 167 of lockdown September 5th 2020 • day 168 of lockdown September 6th 2020 • day 169 of lockdown September 7th 2020 • day 170 of lockdown September 8th 2020 • day 171 of lockdown September 9th 2020 • day 172 of lockdown September 10th 2020 • day 173 of lockdown September 11th 2020 • day 174 of lockdown September 12th 2020 • day 175 of lockdown September 13th 2020 • day 176 of lockdown September 14th 2020 • day 177 of lockdown September 15th 2020 • day 178 of lockdown September 16th 2020 • day 179 of lockdown September 17th 2020 • day 180 of lockdown September 18th 2020 • day 181 of lockdown September 19th 2020 • day 182 of lockdown September 20th 2020 • day 183 of lockdown September 21st 2020 • salami danger man • napoleon hill • joey ramone • john altman was in star wars • the trumpton diets • bono was quite good in that kids film • dave spud is the new rock and roll • bj is trump lite or NWO • blaze tv • Howard Hughes And The Unexplained • the mighty terriers (god loves) • hogan v rogan • i'd cancel myself but no-one would notice • i always preferred bonehead • holiday inn syncs • day job knobhead • qi • If I Get Back On H&J I Will Buy Them Cake • NFT NFT they've all got an NFT • Ricky Gervais Is My Hero • This Album Is Sponsored By….. • Let's Dance Is The Best Bowie Album • Can't Get A GIG in our own town (st Albans) • we don't talk about bruno (fernandes) not scoring anymore • Frank • one day I will duet with dua lipa • help me rhondda witht he LOA • private eye knows the truth about prince andrew • you can advertise here • the science of getting rich is just get people to buy your books • putin never misses a trick • i'm visualising going on the one show to talk about this album • graham norton guest yes that would be fine • i feel real change coming and people will start to value music more imagine life without it • imagine if that $100 million that rogan was paid was instead invested in new music just imagine • since napster and the wild west days of the internet people expect to get it for free - musicians, songwriters and artists all deseve to be paid a fair amount • all we are asking for is a level playing field and transparency • the music industry is eveloving record companies must embrace change and respect the music creators • we all need to come toegther • da doo ron ron aldo • middle of the road all musicians are walking down at the moment expand your minds • the masked singer • should i change my name to elvis • my god the hollies were crap • clement stone • is instagram just for shallow people • the mind can achieve whatever it can conceive • 52 and still wearing my old band t shirts is that ok Mr Robert Crampton? • looking foward to playing this song on Jool Holland • rolling stone are going to do a feature on this album • frank skinner go on give this track a play it's only 30 seconds long and it's for a good cause

attitude of gratitude • are the DSPs having a competition to see who can get away with paying the least amount of royalties • day 237 of lockdown November 14th 2020 • day 238 of lockdown November 15th 2020 • day 239 of lockdown November 16th 2020 • day 240 of lockdown November 17th 2020 • day 241 of lockdown November 18th 2020 • day 242 of lockdown November 19th 2020 • day 243 of lockdown November 20th 2020 • day 244 of lockdown November 21st 2020 • day 245 of lockdown November 22nd 2020 • day 246 of lockdown November 23rd 2020 • day 247 of lockdown November 24th 2020.wav • day 248 of lockdown November 25th 2020 • day 249 of lockdown November 26th 2020 • day 250 of lockdown November 27th 2020 • day 251 of lockdown November 28th 2020 • day 252 of lockdown November 29th 2020 • day 253 of lockdown November 30th 2020 • day 254 of lockdown December 1st 2020 • day 255 of lockdown December 2nd 2020 • day 256 of lockdown December 3rd 2020 • day 257 of lockdown December 4th 2020 • day 258 of lockdown December 5th 2020 • day 259 of lockdown December 6th 2020 • day 260 of lockdown December 7th 2020 • day 261 of lockdown December 8th 2020 • day 262 of lockdown December 9th 2020 • day 263 of lockdown December 10th 2020 • day 264 of lockdown December 11th 2020 • day 265 of lockdown December 12th 2020 • day 266 of lockdown December 13th 2020 • day 267 of lockdown December 14th 2020 • day 268 of lockdown December 15th 2020 • day 269 of lockdown December 16th 2020 • day 270 of lockdown December 17th 2020 • day 271 of lockdown December 18th 2020 • day 272 of lockdown December 19th 2020 • day 273 of lockdown December 20th 2020 • day 274 of lockdown December 21st 2020 • day 275 of lockdown December 22nd 2020 • day 276 of lockdown December 23rd 2020 • day 277 of lockdown December 24th 2020 xmas is cancelled well probably not for BJ and crew • day 278 of lockdown December 25th 2020 • day 279 of lockdown December 26th 2020 • day 280 of lockdown December 27th 2020 • day 281 of lockdown December 28th 2020 • day 282 of lockdown December 29th 2020 • day 283 of lockdown December 30th 2020 • day 284 of lockdown December 31st 2020 • day 285 of lockdown January 1st 2021 • day 286 of lockdown January 2nd 2021 • day 287 of lockdown January 3rd 2021 • day 288 of lockdown January 4th 2021 • day 289 of lockdown January 5th 2021 • day 290 of lockdown January 6th 2021 • day 291 of lockdown January 7th 2021 • day 292 of lockdown January 8th 2021 • day 293 of lockdown January 9th 2021 • day 294 of lockdown January 10th 2021 • day 295 of lockdown January 11th 2021 • day 296 of lockdown January 12th 2021 • zero hours hero • i'm going to sell this album for $48 million • day 299 of lockdown January 15th 2021. • penistone • heaven • fleximusicarian • uri made me do it • ey up it's the hispanic atmosphere of huddersfield town centre • holiday chalet • pleasure beach • i am banksy • no i am banksy • day 309 of lockdown January 25th 2021 • i think there's more than 1 banksy • bad mj style • encanto v frozen • i got invited to join the priory of sion once • beanie boo • gary neville and his moral high ground • paris st germain • day 317 of lockdown February 2nd 202 • day 318 of lockdown February 3rd 2021 • day 319 of lockdown February 4th 2021.wav • davos • what shall we do with the drunken norman mailer • ernie • yvette fielding • total dramrama • wooj • sandi on qi • st albans' people • stream queen • david wagner • my tps reports are wrong again • ctr alt del • ai bot but • Jay Z • LMFAO • Omari West • shawn carter • chicken soup for my rock n roll soul • i thought i was the best rapper in the world • day 339 of lockdown February 24th 2021 • vision it first • thoughts become things • vegasversary • let's gor crazy beep beep • loa part 2 • mystery pohms • coked up interns in the bog • nme • protest too much • another miracle • galaxy quest • chris warburton is a decent chap • under the surface • IT man Noel • badminton iggy pop style • day 355 of lockdown March 12th 2021

day 356 of lockdown March 13th 2021.wav • just chopsing • caiman show • thank you to all our fans • karma • day 361 of lockdown March 18th 2021 • day 362 of lockdown March 19th 2021 • day 363 of lockdown March 20th 2021 • day 364 of lockdown March 21st 2021 • my god get back is longer than this album • day 366 of lockdown March 23rd 2021 • day 367 of lockdown March 24th 2021 • the family madrigal • day 369 of lockdown March 26th 2021 • day 370 of lockdown March 27th 2021 • day 371 of lockdown March 28th 2021 • day 372 of lockdown March 29th 2021 • day 373 of lockdown March 30th 2021 • day 374 of lockdown March 31st 2021 • day 375 of lockdown April 1st 2021 • day 376 of lockdown April 2nd 2021 • day 377 of lockdown April 3rd 2021 • day 378 of lockdown April 4th 2021 • day 379 of lockdown April 5th 2021 • day 380 of lockdown April 6th 2021 • day 381 of lockdown April 7th 2021 • day 382 of lockdown April 8th 2021 • day 383 of lockdown April 9th 2021 • day 384 of lockdown April 10th 2021 • day 385 of lockdown April 11th 2021 • day 386 of lockdown April 12th 2021 • we love haulix • We love hotpress! • Rodney Of The Rock • Daniel Ek The Visionary • day 391 of lockdown April 17th 2021 • one falls they all fall • day 393 of lockdown April 19th 2021 • Lazar 111 • day 395 of lockdown April 21st 2021 • guess that official spotify playlist isn't going to happen now • day 397 of lockdown April 23rd 2021 • day 398 of lockdown April 24th 2021 • day 399 of lockdown April 25th 2021.wav • day 400 of lockdown April 26th 2021 • day 401 of lockdown April 27th 2021 • day 402 of lockdown April 28th 2021 • day 403 of lockdown April 29th 2021 • day 404 of lockdown April 30th 2021 • day 405 of lockdown May 1st 2021 • day 406 of lockdown May 2nd 2021 • day 407 of lockdown May 3rd 2021 • day 408 of lockdown May 4th 2021 • time walker • are we there yet • day 411 of lockdown May 7th 2021.wav • day 412 of lockdown May 8th 2021 • day 413 of lockdown May 9th 2021 • day 414 of lockdown May 10th 2021 • day 415 of lockdown May 11th 2021 • day 416 of lockdown May 12th 2021 • peace piece • talk about the nice time • define • froota • going viral • theses • munching carrots • new gwr • the beatles used the law of attraction • new machine • tct • more plinky guff • anyone bored yet? • fatman jogging (me) • urgent letter • mike errico thank you • day 433 of lockdown May 29th 2021 • columbo • bbq • bar mexe • may your dreams come • rolling atone baby baby • arts and dafts • afters • v is for • misquote • day 443 of lockdown June 8th 2021.wav • hungary • french fries • yo t l • level 42 met mark king in a pub • dinosaur • dance youself dizzy • no score • gritter splitta • jools • bombs • penalty • spurs • day 456 of lockdown June 21st 2021 • db • dear losers • Dear Losers still on repeat sorry • demons • dg • Dino Zoff • Dreaming Of THat Perfect Goal • Drowsy • DUA LIPA • Dull & Bottom • Dy • el mundo gira • elegy • Er • Es • Eu • noel ed • EVERY CRAP INDIE BAND SHOULD RECORD AT LEAST ONE FOOTY SONG • Every Nation Has It's Golden Generation • Exit (pursued by a bear) • F • Facist Football Hater • Faerie Queen • farewell part 1 • farewell part 2 • Farewell parts 1 and 2 • FAST RED MAN • Fe • feedback at the start of i feel fine • FIFA Sutherland • Food of Love • Fr • Franz • french got the funk on • from russia with hetero love • FUELLED UP ON ENERGY DRINKS • Full Fathom 5 Live • Full Time • Ga • Gaberdines And Pantaloons • Garincha Stryder • Gary Lineker • Gazza'a tears • Gd • Ge • george harrison didn't write his 2 biggest hits • gethsamane • give ringo another crap country song • glass onion • glitter on my carpet • GROTESQUE • H • Half Time • Hamlet • Happy Camper • Happy Dagger • have love will louis louis • He • He's A Sticker Licker • Heart's Content • HELL MONEY • helter skelter pissed in the bus shelter • Henry IV part 3 • Henry V's Doorbell • Her Majesty Was The First 30 second song • here come's the sun • HERRENVOLK • Hey Ho Nonny Nonny • Hf • Hg • High Time

Ho • Holographic Beatles On Tour • home • Homeward Bound • Hungary 10 El Salvador 1 • I don't give a flying folio malvolio • I Feel Fine • I got 3 years solitary for bringing my own beer • I ME ME RONALDO! • I ONCE AUDITIONED FOR A BAND CALLED MEXICO 70 • i wanna hold your hand but I'll ask you first • I wanna Hold Your Hand While YOu Sign My A Cheque For a million pound • I Wish The World Cup Was In Brazil Again says lonely sports reporter • I WROTE AND RECORDED 100 SONGS ABOUT THE WORLD CUP IN 2 DAYS, CAN'T YOU TELL • i.am will.i.am shakespeare. • I • I'm a Pal a Salah • I'm Going TO Make you A VAR • I'm Leaving On an standard class Aer Lingus. • I'M SUPPORTING PUSSY RIOT • I'm The Only Person Who Wants Iceland To Get Knocked Out Early.wav • If Prince had written a World Cup song it wouldn't sound like this • If Shakespeare Was Alive Today He'd Be Writing For Youtube • if the beatles were an 80s band • If this album doesn't get me an interview on Hawksbee & Jacobs I'm Going to stop listening to Talksport • If you Listen To The beatles backwards it says thyhtnkks • If You Play THis Song Backwards It Will Sound Crap. • Inv • INTER STELLAR CUP. • introducing the beatles • Ir • It gets a bit messy when you try to rhyme with Messi. • It is music with her silver sound • it's juck a fucking xebra crossing • It's Not even a realy country anyway • Jeremy Corbyn As Julius Ceasar • john lennon v the fbi • joey ramone joins the beatles • jose chungs from outer space. • Josimar comeback • Jules Rimming. • Julian Lennon PLayed THis Piano Once. • JUMPERS FOR GOAL POSTS. • Just Don't Let Spain Win Again • K • KADDISH. • KGB V FBI WORLD WAR 3 COMING SOON • King James 46 • King John's Rant • Kingdom For A Stage. • Kr • La • Lark • Larry O • leonard betts. • Let Music Sound • Letchkov not Letcho • Li. • live and let die is the best bond theme. • Living On Top Of A Porno Cinema • Love Is Blind. • Lr • Lu. • magic alex • man from the motor trade. • Manna • Marying A Punk. • MAX. • mcartney's ego trip part 2 • McCartney's Ego Trip • MEMENTO MORI • Mg • Mn. • Mo • MOOY JOY • Motley Coat • mr kite • Mr Trump • Much Ado • musings of a csm • N • Na • Nb • Nd • Ne. • nems • NEVER AGAIN. • Ni. • NO SCORE…NO DRAW. • none more white. • Not Many Beatles Songs Start in A Minor Key • Not Many Foootball Players Like Punk! • Np. • Oberon Kenobi. • On Shakespeare's Grave • on the field where i died • Ophelia • Os. • Oyster. • P. • Pa • paper hearts • Patti • paul's first acid trip • Pb • Pd. • PELE • Pet Sounds • Pete Best • Pick (ford) Of The Pops - Numba 1 • pickles the dog • PIPER • Play On. • Playing For Penalties. • Pm • Po • Pr • Pt • Putin hot • Pursued By A Bear • Pusher • QUAGMIRE • Hall Of fame • Quickly • ra ra poohtin • Ra • Rain • Ray Wilson • Rb. • Re • Redux 1. • Redux 2. • Revolution number 9 was way ahed of its time • rf. • Rh • Ringo's Replacement • Ripping Off The Beach Boys • Rn • Rocky Racoon as a Trump Type tycoon • Rome • Romeo & Juliet • ronnie scott • Ru • rubber soul was the greatest • Russian Bear • S • sanguinarium • Sb • Sc. • scrambled eggs. • scurvy politician • Se. • sergeant pepper seeks lady madonna to form lonely hearts club band • Second Best Bed (In Da House) • Shake It Off • All Over? • Shakespeare In Time • Shakespeare The Commuter • Shakespeare v Aliens. • Shakespeare v Spotify • Shaking Speare Stevens • Shaquiri V Shakira • She's A Woman • shitter's full. • Si • silent night • Slave Labour Stadiums • Sm • Sm1 • SMALLPOTATOES • Sn. • Sonic Youth Play The Beatles • world cup widows • Sounds Of Music • Spot the player on Coke • Sr • Stadium Inferno • Stage Craft Beer. • Star Of England • Stop Calling It The White Album - It's The Beatles! • Suicide In Shakespeare. • corned beef curry (not my idea) • Larry O • SYNCHRONY • SZYGY 4 • Ta • TALITHA • TAX CHEATS • tb or not tb • Tb • Tc. • when does art become pretension? • Teliko • TEMPUS FUGIT • TERMA • TEsos dos bichos 2 • the very best of Boris Johnson

The Ballad Of The Poisened Referee • The Beatles Gave Us Backwards Guitar • The Beatles Meet Elvis and Play Bass. • The Beatles Meet The Queen • THE BEST ONE YET • The Blue Samurai • the catcher in the rye. • The Charnocks. • The Curse Of WS • The Day I Met George Martin • the death of good duke humphrey • the doors took more drugs than the beatles • The First Twitter World Cup • The Globe • the hamburg days • The Life Of Brian • the long and winding road to get this album finished • The Maradona OF The Carpathians • The Middle Class Wives Of Windsor • The Miracle Of Bern • the missing chord • The Old Boys Of Panama • the people that don't get the beatles. • The Ringo Button • The Seven Moons • the trembling wilburrys • the usual suspects • The Water Carrier • THe White Album • There are 3 Gary Stevens But Only one of them caught a glimpse of Maradonna flying by • japan • this is a northern song • when does sound become music • Time Doth Waste Me • soundaries • white noise symphony • to die to sleep no more. • Tomorrow Never Knows Is The First Techno Track. • Tongue In Your Tail. • TOO MANY WHITE LINES • Tosspots. • Trident Studio Jam • Trump Town • TUNGUSKA • Turn Turn Turn in a Cruyf Style • U • unbeaten keepers • UNREQUITED • UNRUHE • V is for Vacumn • W • Was it Bobby or Roger Moore that was the towel thief. • WE ALL HATE WHEN ITV HAS THE MATCHES • We All Know Sexie Sadie Was About The Maharishi.wav • We All Live In A Yellow Submarine • We All Love Football Guff. • WETWIRED • WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO HALF TIME ORANGES • whatever happened to 442 • When i'm Pissed I'll Shout • When Shall We 3 Meet Again • when we were fab. • While THey Play The Bombs Keep Dropping • why were wings so • will anyone get close to Klose • Willow Willow Willow • World Cup Snacks • WORLD CUP WIDOWS • World Cup Winners Aftershow Party • World Cup Winners Hangover • World In Motion Was So Over Rated • World Of Leather • Xe • summer jesus • Y • Yb • you can't burn streams • zero sum • didn't think I would make it to 1000 • ok thanks to all involved and peace and love • 3000 streams just for a pint • time to go it's chicken time

[zot3-flopped]

https://www.billboard.com/music/pop/katy-perry-greatest-pop-stars-21st-century-1235755851/amp/

Do you think Harry will win this?

No - it's set up for Taygreedy to win. Fervently patriotic Billboard would never allow a Brit or a Canadian to win over an American. Beyonce, The Weeknd, Ed Sheeran, Harry, Rihanna, Justin Bieber, Adele, Bad Bunny will probably be up there in the top ten but I'm not sure in what order. They've already exempted Billie, Dua Lipa, Post Malone and others from the top 25 because they weren't active in the 2005-2015 period.