#acutane is evil bc i took it with 2.5 less grams of fat than usual and felt so goddamn sick i had to sleep or throw up.

[b0mblover]

明天

By: J

Just some sort shitty Noriko angst ig!

Cws: None(?)

[this is supposed to be in a 3-5 part series but i have no idea if i’ll actually end up doing it, so for now posting it standalone, will update if this changes]

——

Click click click click click click

the clocks go same as everyday.

two clocks that would never align no matter what.

quite an annoying sound.

the slow quiet dripping of water could be heard in the background.

drip. drip. drip. drip.

it had been quiet for the past few days.

too quiet.

everything felt so cold in spite it being spring.

her body felt too heavy to move out of bed.

the world just felt so..empty.

would it be called on variable that caused this? or multiple?

it felt pointless to wonder, she already knew what they felt and thought.

staring at the darkened ceiling, imagining it was a night sky full of stars above.

blanket being blades of grass that no matter how you laid, somehow always managing to caress the skin so annoyingly.

“Do you think that if a star went missing, anyone would notice?”

Words ringed through her mind.

“Well yeah, someone would have to right?”

“Would they though?”

She grabbed her pillow

“I mean, at least other stars would right? Besides what kinda question is that anyways?!”

That smile..

“Haa i guess youre right, but y’know’, with how far apart stars really are from each other, even if they seem so close together from here…”

“….”

Tears fell down her face, onto her lips. In a way, it felt like she was drowning.

No one was coming to save her. 

No one.

.

She raised her hand to the ceiling, fingers spread as if she was trying to clutch the sky.

“If you were a constellation…i think you’d be cassiopeia”

“Huh?”

“Cassiopeia. See over there”

“Why that though? Couldnt youve picked a more notable one like i dunno… canis major? or was it minor?”

“Hahaa its probably canis major youre thinking of. and honestly? I dunno why..it just reminds me of you….i like it.”

“Hmm well then.. lets see… youd beeee……. orions belt!”

“Just his belt??”

“Yep! Bland but easily recognizable!”

“I dont know if thats a good or bad thing”

“Hey! i wasnt finished! Plus even with how minor it seems, you keep things up and running”

“Are you saying that Revolutionary Armys pants would fall down without me or something…?”

“Exactly!”

“…..Maybe, but i dont think it would honestly. I think you’d all do well even without me”

Its more than that.

Its so much more than that.

Her breath hitched as there was a knock on the door.

Then the door creaking, light flooding the all too messy room.

“Still dont want to talk?”

She looked at the backlit silhouette.

“…”

“At least drink. Please? I know it- its hard but he woul-“

“Shut up.”

“What?”

“I said, Shut. Up. you dont know what he wouldve wanted.”

“Noriko I-“

“Dont call me that.”

As heavy as her body felt, as cold as it all felt.

A door could be heard slamming.

.

Click click click

Recently, one of the clocks seem to have broken.