#actually i hate like everyone i knew from that fandom. i think there are maybe three people who i DON'T hold disdain toward

[starlooove]

The whole made up “tim is seen/treated as an employee by everyone’” thing is funny vs just how much Steph and spoiler as an identity got disrespected by literally everybody. Like not even hated just the casual disrespect for her is soooo

[carnographix]

You've heard of fanart, get ready for hateart.

I hate this fucking game and its fandom and anytime I see anything from it mentioned I feel the visceral urge to smash my head into the brick wall and not even in a funny way. The hatred and animosity I feel toward it is honestly so strong, it's absurd. If I can go without ever hearing about anything related to it again I will be happy. Do not bring it up around me. I will kill you. I will bash your head in with a rock. Thanks ♡

[reallyromealone]

May I request Leona K. x male reader? Reader is like Isabella Madrigal from Encanto. He is florokinetic, is beautiful and graceful in every way, and has a sass streak. Maybe just enemies to lovers? Thank you, and take your time!

Title: careful it's carnivorous

Pairing: Leona kingscholar x reader

Fandom: twisted wonderland

Warnings:

Notes:

☁️🐟☁️🐟☁️🐟☁️🐟☁️🐟☁️🐟☁️🐟☁️🐟☁️🐟☁️

Flowers.

Everywhere.

God Leona hated spring, it was when his least favorite classmate was fully... Himself.

Everyone knew (name), his floral magic was like nothing anyone had seen before and annoyingly perfect as he provided professor Crewel a flower he needed through magic.

"We will be pairing our all in groups of two, the names for each group are on the chart by the door" Crewel said simply as the class ended, each student going to check theit name on the list before leaving "oh you have to be kidding" (name) grumbled as he looked at the chart, his name was right beside the most insufferable person at this schools, Leona Kingscholar. "You better pull your weight!" (Name) seethed and Leona rolled his eyes "why don't you stop telling me what to do?" He drawled out with a catty smile, (name) fuming before storming off.

Leona grumbled as he walked into the greenhouse, (name) already gone to work at collecting things "couldn't you just magic the supplies? Or is your magic just good for making flowers" Leona said mockingly and (name) rolled his eyes "it would be unfair of us to do that, I'm not gonna cheat my way through this" now it was Leona's turn to roll his eyes as he looked at (name) "what are we even doing?"

"Luck potion" an extremely difficult potion, one mistake and they wouldn't even remotely have time to make a new one with its fermenting process.

"You think we can handle that?"

"If you stop lazing around, we absolutely could" (name) was self-assured, as always and Leona scoffed at him "god you're insufferable"

"I can't, I'm sorry" (name) said over the phone, it was known in the Pomefiore dorm that (name) had a complex relationship with his family, especially his grandmother who treated him like a trophy of sorts "I-im sorry, I have too many commitments here"

Another engagement offer.

He wasn't some bargaining chip.

After phone calls, he often found himself sitting in the greenhouse alone, frustration and hurt seeped through him as he let his composure slip, god he was just so done.

Being the eldest of seven, the responsibilities fell on him aways and he knew he made his grandma upset when he chose night ravens college over royal swords academy but he did it because he wanted this school, it had what he wanted.

Leona sighed as he walked through the halls of the academy, doing the patrols before bed when he saw a familiar figure walk towards the greenhouse "oh?" Well tonight was sure interesting to say the least, after all... "Wow, the perfect one breaking a rule? Isn't this funny" (name) turned to see Leona smirk down at him "just... Shut up" (name) whispered as he stood up "you can be cocky and shit but just... Shut up for once" (name) whispered as vines grew around the garden "can't you just leave me alone for once?"

"Wow, wheres the bite you usually have? Come on, pretty boy" Leona taunted and (name) felt his patience wear thin "can you just fuck off!" He yelled as cacti grew around them, the two stunned "you can grow those?"

"Apparently I can" (name)s grandmother always told him he could only grow flowers... "So why are you out here, little Mr. Perfect?" (Name)s mood shifted as he glared at him "oh shut up, you lazy ass!" He spat back and Leona grinned, there was the snarky flower boy he knew and hated "god you can't shit your trap! God if you could use that energy for being a shit maybe use it for our project!"

"And maybe you could stop being so annoying for once and I would actually want to do it!"

"Asshole!"

"Priss!"

And somehow, (name)s foul mood about his grandmother was gone as the two argued down the ball and a tiny cactus with two flowers on it sat in the greenhouse.

The following day, Leona grumbled as he felt vines grab his ankle "hurry up before I drag you!" (Name) said as he strutted down the hall, looking flawless as Leona glared but followed, other students admiring (name) as he passed and bloomed flower crowns on each of their heads.

"(Name)" malleus said softly, staring down (name) as he and Ace were leaving the lab "Malleus" (name) said coldly, leaning back when malleus got closer "absolutely not, we are not doing this again" (name) glared and waved a bunch of flowers at his face as he and Leona went into the lab, locking the door behind them "I know he's insufferable but what was that about?" Leona stretched and (name) rolled his eyes, taking out their supplies from the small lockers they reserved.

"My grandmother tried to have me engaged to him, malleus was all for it but I said no because god if I have to hear about gargoyles one more time..."

"He never shuts up about them, also how is it I manage to show up to things before him!" Leona fired back as they started the project, both talking heatedly about the fae prince.

It was the first time they agreed on something.

After that, their conversations were less hostile and Leona actually found himself enjoying (name)s company.

(Name) walked into the greenhouse later in the afternoon and saw Leona sleeping in a sun beam, rolling his eyes at this (name) grabbed a notebook he forgotten and went to walk out but before he did... "He's sleeping, he won't know" and like that a leaf grew right where the sun was hitting his eyes.

Only Leona was awake and was smirking as (name) clicked the door shut.

After that, working with (name) was far more tolerable, the two actually not going at each other much to everyones surprise and when something strange happens... Rumors start.

"Apparently, you and I are engaged because you blackmailed my family" (name) teased as he looked over the sleeping hybrid "really? I heard we had a passionate makeout session after you confessed to me with a bouquet of roses" Leona said back and the two chuckled at the nonsense that their classmates came up with as they focused on their work-- well (name) did, Leona relaxed in the corner.

Then his phone went off.

Again

And again

"Hello grandma, yes I did hear--- well I am not interested in him! So I'm not marrying him! I don't care if he's a good connection!" (Name) angrily hung up And Leona raised an eyebrow "she sounds like a bitch" Leona said simply and (name) sighed "she isn't the best" (name) mumbled "she wants me to marry someone so she can get up in the social latter... But I would rather eat glass then be with the people she offered me to"

"Who would you want?"

"Someone who isn't pretentious, not going to put me in a box and doesn't make me act perfect"

"Act?"

"You think I want to be like this? Perfect? Unable to make a mistake?"

He just wanted to garden.

And that is when Leona fell.

(Name) was awkward after the project finished, looking over at Leona who was about to fall asleep but took notice of (name)s slight deflation "come on rabbit food" Leona grumbled as he dragged a confused (name) "where are we going?"

"Don't worry about it princess" (name) looked offended at the nickname, he was a prince at least!

And that's when it happened, in a forgotten corner of the school.

A kiss.

"Still think you're an ass"

[victimsofyaoipoll]

Finals

Propaganda Under Cut

Sakura Haruno

Her husband is gay and her author doesn't know how to write women. So many people say she's the worst but she. DESERVES. BETTER!!! Save her from this franchise.

My baby girl my bestie my best friend. She committed the crime of um being written by kishimoto who both doesn’t know how to write women and somehow writes men in the gayest way possible specifically naruto and sasuke. Like the thing is naruto and sasuke ARE gay and also she gets so much hate for the crime of kishimoto writing her one dimensionally in love with sasuke. I know her personally she is a butch lesbian to me just trust me she’s in love with Ino and has a lesbian thing going on with Karin okay just trust me. My everything. She needs to divorce the loveless lavender marriage she’s in 

What is there to say, even? The OG Threat to my 90s anime brain, the only woman I've ever hated with such a passion she made me turn away from the color pink. I used to write fics with my friend where she got left behind on purpose so our OCs could join the Naruto and Sasuke team instead. I loathed this bitch until I was 16 and realized the author simply couldnt write women and decided it was time to make peace with Sakura. It is not her fault she's vaguely written and obsessive over Sasuke. She deserves better. Sasuke and Naruto still should be together and Sakura shouldnt be with Sasuke but I no longer believe this because I hate Sakura, it is because I love her. She deserves a spouse who will actually put in the time to treat her like the hero she is.

Misa Amane

she gets treated in-canon the way fandoms treat female characters that Threaten an m/m ship. it's like, "oh why don't you go sit in the corner and be pretty, misa, while the Men have intelligent conversation and pretend they aren't ten seconds from fucking each other, doesn't that sound nice?" it's infuriating. and MAYBE it's better now but i remember her getting treated the same way in fanfiction too, like we all need to do just as badly by our female secondary characters as fucking tsugumi ohba, but with the added insult of making her be alternately oblivious of the relationship between light and L or actively trying to sabotage it—incompetently, of course, because god forbid misa be allowed dignity or moments of cleverness.

she's one of the first characters I think of when I consider old school fandom misogyny. The annoying bitch and clingy crazy gf allegations were AFTER HER ASS. She's also a lot more intelligent than people gave her credit for, but most seem inclined to take the Very Biased word of our unreliable, narcissistic narrator and his homoerotic arch nemesis and claim that just because she's bubbly and into romance that she's also a complete moron. Which is blatantly untrue. Everyone was afraid of Misa girlbossing too hard. Killing people and devoting yourself to the deranged twink of your dreams even though you know he'll never love you back??? Having a hardcore goth aesthetic and being so Hot even literal Death Gods are into you?? God forbid women do ANYTHING!

Not only is she the victim of yaoi culture, she is the victim of early 2000s misogyny by an author that wanted to introduce a girl character because he knew his male rivals were getting too homoerotic. She is a goth bimbo icon who portrays what I think is one of the few callouts for stan culture and what parasocial relationships can do to both the stan and the idol. The fact that she is a toxic fan of Kira and also hot, funny, sociable is tragic in its own way, which I think the author did try to touch on but was too misogynistic too really get through. Of course, she was reduced to villain status by the fandom and anime alike because she got in the way of the supposed romance in their psychological horror anime

[fluentmoviequoter]

Call a Truce

Requested Here!

Pairing: Tim Bradford x fem!cop!reader

Summary: You and Tim have a rivalry that began when you were rookies. Years later, you continue competing in everything you do, even when you're helping Tim get out of a dangerous situation.

Warnings: Tim gets hurt (tased, cut, broken ribs, goes to the hospital), angst, mentions of robberies, fluff! pretty standard Rookie warnings I think

Word Count: 3.6k+ words

Picture from Pinterest

Masterlist | Tim Bradford Masterlist | Request Info/Fandom List

“You’re going to pass your rookie exam,” your TO said on your second day of training. “But there’s one thing I need you to do. Score higher than Bradford.”

And, like that, a rivalry was born.

Years after you started competing against Tim Bradford to be the best rookie, your rivalry has only strengthened. Everyone in your station knows about your competitive natures, but to outsiders and visitors, it seems like you and Tim hate one another. There has never been any real animosity, only competition and everything that comes with it.

“We’re riding together today,” Tim says.

You turn quickly, surprised to see him standing beside you. “What?” you ask.

“I just talked to Grey. We’re riding together, but he wouldn’t tell me why. Something to do with the string of robberies, I presume.”

“And he thought you would need help from a competent cop,” you reply with a nod. “I guess I can make time for that.”

“If that’s what you need to hear to actually try for once. I could find the guy on my own faster than you can get out of the shop.”

“We’ll see about that,” you scoff.

“We certainly will. The first one to spot anything gets a point, making contact gets five, and the arresting officer gets fifty. Deal?”

You look at Tim’s hand and wrinkle your nose in faux disgust before you shake. “You’re going down, Bradford.”

“And you’ll break the fall, boot.”

“You’re a jerk.”

“Bradford!” Grey yells. “Let’s go! Roll call doesn’t wait for you.”

You smirk as you step backward toward the door. “Such a bad cop, Bradford. Keep your social schedule on your own time.”

“You wish you were part of my social schedule,” he counters.

“At least you’d have one then. When I have fifty-six winning points, maybe I’ll invite you to the celebration.”

Tim rolls his eyes and follows you inside. He can’t remember the last time he did anything with you that wasn’t a competition. You’re both good cops, though, so as long as you get the job done, your work rivalry isn’t hurting anyone.

“What’s it like?” you ask from the passenger seat.

“What’s what like?” Tim replies.

“Being a control freak that still loses.”

“Cute,” Tim mumbles. “At least I didn’t have to wear long sleeves for an extra month like someone I know.”

“Yeah, Lucy didn’t deserve that,” you agree. “You’re just a terrible TO, so you knew she wasn’t ready.”

“Or maybe she picked the wrong cop to idolize,” Tim snaps.

“Tim? Did you just admit that Lucy thinks I’m a better cop than you?” you ask happily. “Because I knew she had good taste, but I wasn’t sure if you knew that.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be looking for a suspect instead of obsessing over how people see you?”

“Aren’t you supposed to be driving instead of getting angry because I’m right?”

Tim takes a deep breath and returns his attention to the road. You push his buttons, but he pushes you just as hard. Everything between you is competitive, there’s a deep-seated need to prove that you’re better because of how your TOs treated you in your boot days.

Your phone rings, and you wave Tim off before he can tell you not to answer it.

“Detective Lopez,” you greet, though you say it toward Tim. “How can I help you?”

“Can you come back to the station or are you too busy flirting- I mean competing with Tim?” she asks.

“I can come back. Tim?” you begin.

“Got it,” he interjects softly. He hits his blinker and enters a turn lane to take you back.

“I’ll be there in ten,” you tell Angela.

“Thank you. We got a lead on where the stolen goods may be stashed but we’re shorthanded.”

“No problem.”

Angela ends the call, and you look at the road as you think about the details of the case. Something isn’t adding up. They know plenty about the suspect, but not where he lives or where all of the stolen property ended up. The guy seems homeless.

“Guess she figured out that you’re not going to find anything out here that I can’t find alone,” Tim muses.

“Or she knows that I’ve got a better chance of blowing this case open if you’re not aimlessly dragging me around the city.”

“What’d she say?” Tim asks.

“They found a lead and don’t have enough people to trace it. You can ride alone, as far as they know, so I get to track down tips.”

“I’ll find our guy before you find anything helpful,” Tim declares.

“Yeah, right!” you argue, turning in your seat to face him. “First one to find something that the detectives deem useful wins.”

“Wins what?”

You purse your lips as you think. There are not many rewards left that you and Tim haven’t already competed for. Maybe it shouldn’t be a material item, you think.

“The loser admits, in roll call tomorrow, that the winner is a better cop,” you suggest.

“It would be fun to hear you say that,” Tim says quietly. “Deal.”

He extends his right hand over the console, and you shake it firmly before sitting back in your seat. When he arrives back at the station, you exit the shop and salute him sarcastically before you walk inside. You begin to worry very quickly that the lead Angela called you back for may not be anything. No matter what, you have to beat Tim because you can’t lose.

“Control, this is Bradford, can you get me information on who owns 1219 Larga Avenue?” Tim radios.

“1219 Larga Avenue is leased by Corporeal Corporations,” control answers.

“A shell corporation,” Tim says to himself.

He’s been following a vehicle matching one listed on the case report. It isn’t the suspect’s vehicle, but one of his acquaintances’. Tim parks down the street and watches the house from his side mirror for several minutes. Whoever was driving the car seems to be staying for a while.

“Control, this is Bradford. I’m approaching the house, code 6-Charles.”

“Assistance on standby.”

Tim opens his door and then hesitates. In his uniform, he has no chance of getting close to anyone in that house. He could approach the house next door to gather intel about how many people are inside, but that could spook them and get innocent people hurt. The third option, one he will never admit to learning from you, is to play the part of a stupid cop at the wrong house.

“Officer!” a woman yells across the street.

Tim gestures for her to quiet before he closes his door and walks across the street. “How can I help you, ma’am?” he asks.

“There was this car that kept driving up and down the road yesterday! It was a young boy and an older man, and they would just drive down, turn around, and come back. I live here, my children play here, and if this is going to become a cesspool of gang people, someone needs to do something!” she explains.

“Ma’am, it sounds to me like a man may have just been teaching his son how to drive on a residential street, which is neither illegal nor gang-related. If you see them again, call the non-emergency line and someone will come make sure everything is alright.”

Tim has dealt with his fair share of stupid complaints, but he can’t even be bothered by this one. Not when something malicious may be taking place four houses away. The woman huffs as she turns to go back to her home. Just as she turns off the sidewalk, someone shoots.

Tim dives behind a nearby car and braces himself against the back bumper. Based on the spray of bullets destroying the car, Tim guesses it’s numerous semi-automatic rifles that he’s up against.

“Dispatch, I need that backup! I’m taking heavy fire,” he radios.

A moment later, dispatch calls, “Code 99” with his location. Tim curses; he doesn’t need every cop in the county coming to his rescue, just one or two. The bullets slow, and Tim moves carefully to the edge of the vehicle. Three men stand in the yard, and he aims his gun at the one closest to him. While he’s replacing the magazine into the gun, Tim shoots his leg, and he falls to the ground. The others open fire again, and Tim spins to be out of sight again.

A heavy hand lands on Tim’s shoulder, and before he can react, a knife is pressed to his throat. Everything goes silent as he’s lifted to his feet and shoved toward the sidewalk. The men have taken their injured partner inside, and Tim knows that once he’s in that house, he is as good as dead.

“Look, man, I just came to answer another call. Let me go and nothing happens,” he tells the man pushing him.

“You already called for backup.”

“And they’ll go to the other house, see a shot-up car. The most you have to do is answer the door and say ‘No, officer, I didn’t see a thing.’”

“You won’t see a thing if you don’t shut up,” the man growls as they near the door.

Tim stands up straighter, and when the knife falls toward his chest rather than his neck, he kicks backward and into the man’s knee. The knife scrapes across Tim’s uniform, but he doesn’t feel it as he turns to face the door and grabs his gun. His hand reaches the holster, but it’s empty. Tim looks around and realizes that his gun must be behind the car. He retrieves the knife from the ground and prepares to run for the car, but two prongs from a taser enter his chest before he can, and he collapses beside his fourth assailant. Sirens echo in the distance as Tim fights to stay conscious. The man on the porch squeezes the trigger again, and Tim only feels the first twitch of his legs before everything stops.

“LAPD, open up!” you yell.

You are moments away from punching the door when it swings open. Immediately, you recognize the long-haired man as your robbery suspect. The chances of him being alone are slim, though, so you can’t think about Tim right now, only about getting this man in custody without getting hurt or killed.

“How can I help, officer?” he asks, leaning against the door to block your view inside.

“I just have a question about the car parked down the street,” you explain with a friendly smile.

“All of my cars are here in my driveway. Maybe ask someone else.”

“So, you don’t know who owns the grey sedan with all the bullet holes and a dead body in the back?” you ask, raising your brows.

“Dead body,” he repeats. He looks past you like he’s trying to figure out how that got there.

“The owner?” you press.

“Oh, sure, uh Miguel, I think is his name. Big guy down the street.”

“Thank you so much for your help. Could I just get your name for my report?” you ask.

“Cody Lambert,” he answers, still looking past you.

You’re surprised that he gives you his real name. Your lie about the body in his car jarred him more than you expected.

“And are you here alone today?” you ask.

“Yes, ma’am.”

He shifts slightly, and you can see an empty living room behind him. You have an opportunity, but if you take it and you’re wrong, you may be putting Tim’s life on the line.

“Could you point out which house Miguel lives in? I’m terrible with numbers and directions.” You laugh at yourself to sell your dumb act and pray that it works.

“Yeah,” he mumbles, stepping out onto the porch.

He closes the door behind him, and you waste no time pushing him down onto the ground. You keep his face turned toward the dirt so he can’t yell as you secure the handcuffs.

“You’re under arrest,” you say in his ear. “And if you yell when I pick you up, I can’t promise anything. If you stay quiet, though, I’ll get you the best pro bono attorney in the state. Understood?”

He doesn’t acknowledge your offer, so you drive your knee between his kidneys and repeat, “Understood?”

He groans against the ground before a muffled, “Yes,” reaches your ears. You pull him up and walk him to your shop where it’s parked in front of the next house. As you reach for the radio to alert dispatch, a gun is fired inside the house.

“Too late,” your suspect says as you turn to look.

You abandon the radio on the floorboard of the passenger seat and slam the door. As you return to the front door and kick it in, you keep your gun ready. There isn’t time to waste in a situation like this, and Tim is counting on you. If he’s still here and still alive, that is.

When you reach a closed door at the end of the hallway after clearing the other rooms, you raise your gun before you and kick the door open. It hits the wall with a thud as you step over the threshold. One of Cody’s known acquaintances blocks your path, with a puddle of blood beneath him. You look past him to clear the room, but see what you’re looking for before you finish.

“Tim,” you say when you see him stretched out on a broken twin-sized bed.

“Took you long enough,” he mumbles. “And I won.”

You lean over him as you holster your weapon. He is injured and needs assistance, but his radio is smashed and yours is in the shop.

“Are there more of them?” you ask.

“There’s four.”

Tim hasn’t opened his eyes yet, which concerns you. More concerning, however, is the knowledge that there are two more people around this house. You cleared it, but they could be waiting in the attic or just outside.

“I’ll go call for help,” you tell Tim. “Stay alert.”

As you turn, heavy footsteps rattle the walls of the hallway. You look back to Tim and know you can’t leave him here. Even if you do argue, compete, and tease each other, you’re both cops and you have to protect one another. Plus, you care about him, and it hurts you to see him like this. Carefully, you push the door closed and lock it. There’s nothing in the room to block it with… except for the suspect on the floor.

“Did you shoot him?” you whisper. “How?”

“His gun,” Tim mumbles.

You tilt your head quickly, surprised and impressed, though you know Tim has more training in this kind of thing than the average cop. The guy is heavy, literally dead weight, but you roll him against the door as an extra cover before you sidestep the blood puddle and return to Tim’s side.

“Where are you hurt?” you whisper as you kneel beside him.

Tim hums, and you know he’s fading fast. You murmur an apology before you begin unbuttoning his uniform. When you begin to pull it open, you notice two taser prongs buried in his pec muscles. You pull them out quickly and squeeze your eyes closed when Tim grunts.

With his shirt open, you can see a several bloody spots, a scrape against his chest, and swelling on his right side. Gently laying a hand over his t-shirt, you know that his ribs are broken.

“I need to look, Tim,” you say as you grab the bottom of his shirt. “I’m sorry.”

You pull his shirt up carefully and inhale sharply when you see the bruises littering his torso and chest. The swelling looks worse without fabric over it.

“Can you breathe well?” you ask.

Tim shakes his head, a small movement that you feel more than see. There’s a chance that his broken rib has punctured a lung, and he needs medical attention now.

“Thank you,” Tim says. His eyes are still closed, but you watch his face as he says it.

A few moments later, Tim moves his left hand to catch yours as you look at the scrape spanning his chest. He squeezes your wrist softly and your eyes raise to his.

Tim blinks his eyes open and waits until he finds your face to ask, “Why are you helping me?”

“Tim,” you begin. “Why wouldn’t I? You can’t tell me that you think I hate you because of our rivalry. That’s all it has ever been, competition.”

Tim nods as his eyes close again. “I thought you’d be a better cop than me,” he mumbles. “But I got a promotion first.”

You chuckle, trying to ignore the pressure behind your eyes as you watch him lose the battle to stay conscious. In this moment, you feel something that you’ve never experienced before. All the teasing, and the competition to stay close to Tim, were different than this. The care you show him now helps you to see him differently.

Similarly, though his thoughts are jumbled in a mix of pain and adrenaline, Tim sees you as he never has before. Your soft touches, apologies, and clear care and concern for him awaken something in him. Maybe it’s been sleeping or maybe it wasn’t there before today, but Tim likes having you close like this.

“Promise me something,” you whisper. “When we get out of this, we’ll know that we both won.”

Tim nods, and you carefully remove your hand from his. With your gun, plus the one Tim used to kill Cody’s goon, you climb out of the window to get Tim help and the first aid kit from your shop. He knows you’re a good cop, but without you by his side, he can’t take the pain and the worry together, and he finally succumbs to the darkness again.

“I feel fine!” Tim argues with the nurse. “I can go home. There’s no reason to keep me here.”

“The doctors want to observe you overnight to ensure there’s no long-term damage, Officer Bradford,” she replies. “If you stop complaining, it will go faster.”

You knock on the open door with a bag in your hand, and the nurse waves you inside before she leaves. Tim looks at you from his hospital bed, and you offer a small smile. In the minutes after you left Tim in the house, you called for backup, searched the house again, put another suspect in custody, and got into a one-on-one fight with the last one. Tim doesn’t know just how much you went through in those five minutes that you waited for more backup, and he doesn’t need to. All that matters is that he’s safe and is getting better.

“How are you?” you ask.

“Fine,” he answers, watching the bag in your hand.

“Yeah, it’s for you.”

You pass him the bag with his favorite food, a play-by-play of last night’s game, and a picture of Kojo from the dogsitter. As he looks through it, you decide to tell him what you stayed awake thinking about. You finished filing your report as the sun rose over LA, and then you spent the few hours before you could visit Tim thinking of only one thing.

“I think we should call a truce,” you suggest. “A lot has changed in the last twenty-four hours.”

“I don’t want a truce,” Tim answers quickly. “We push each other to be better. We need that.”

“Okay,” you say slowly. “Then what do we do? Because I can’t go back to just competing all the time, not after what happened.”

“What happened?”

“If you didn’t feel it, I can’t explain it to you, Tim,” you answer softly, wringing your fingers together.

“You want to be more than competitive friends?” Tim guesses.

You shrug, and he shakes his head.

“I won’t stop competing with you or-“

“Taking figurative shots at me?” you finish playfully. “Better than real shots. I’m fine with not changing that part of our relationship, Tim. Besides, you and I both know that our friends are nosy, and it would be awful if we just started being nice to each other.”

Tim nods, and after a moment, looks at you. He extends his hand toward you, and you happily take it.

“Would you like to go to dinner after I get out of here?” he asks.

“I’d love that. I’m also planning to pass you during the next promotion. Then you can call me Sergeant when you try to tell me you’re better than me.”

“We’ll see about that,” Tim responds. “But I get to pick where we go since I did win the last competition.”

“I saved your life!”

“But I found our guy.”

“Maybe we both won,” you remind him.

A few weeks later, you kept your promise and now outrank Tim. Not for long, you assume, because he’s a great cop with a bright future, but for now it’s fun to remind him that you’re a Sergeant while he’s still an Officer. “Whoever makes the first arrest today gets to pick where we go on our date Saturday,” you say.

“Whatever you want, Sergeant,” Tim answers.

He tilts your chin gently before he kisses you. You sigh in contentment, happier than ever with Tim. When he releases you, you both climb out of his truck and walk toward the station.

“When I get a position on Metro, I get to say it first,” Tim says as he opens the door for you.

“That’s not fair!” you argue, blocking the doorway.

“If you’re scared that it’ll happen too soon, just say so,” Tim taunts.

“Fine,” you agree, offering your hand to shake.

He shakes your hand, then pulls you into a quick kiss.

“Have a nice day, Sergeant,” he calls as he walks away.

“You too, boot.”

[bad268]

hey! hope you are well. I was thinking of an idea for a Kimi Antonelli x reader story and as you write for him the best I knew you would write it so well.

maybe reader is toto's daughter, and her and kimi are in a relationship. but y/n can't make it to the last race of the season but she ends up surprising him after the race (she was there the whole time) and he runs to her and its all adorable and everyone is clapping?

just a thought!

love your work!

Couldn't Keep Me Away (Andrea Kimi Antonelli X Wolff! Reader)

Fandom: RPF/F2/F3

Requested: Clearly (I think I cooked too much with this lol...)

Warnings: sick! reader, mentions cough medicine

POV: Second Person (You/your/She/her)

W.C. 1956

Summary: She's never missed a race…until now?

As always, my requests are OPEN

MASTERLIST // HITLIST

~~(@/Kimi’s insta from February 13, 2024)

It all came down to this. Not in the literal sense, more along the lines of it was the last race of the season. The team’s champions and driver’s championship had already been decided, so there was nothing to lose in this race. Well, except his sanity.

You had been at every race this season. Not because of your father, Toto Wolff. Actually, maybe that played a part, but you were always in the Prema garage. He could not remember what it was like to not have you in the garage between practice and qualifying or during pre-race shenanigans. 

When you were not on track for media day, he knew something was up. Yes, he knew you hated media day because it was boring, but it was also the day you had the most time together since the F1 teams and drivers were more popular interviewees. He tried texting and calling you only to receive nothing in response. He knew what he was going to have to do.

Speak to your father. 

He decided to stop by before the sprint race. Walking into the Mercedes garage, he spotted your father immediately and standing beside him, your mother, Susie, and brother, Jack. He suddenly knew that you should have been here too. The only reason you gave him in the past for why you may need to miss a race was to watch your brother. You never did miss a race, but there was always the possibility.

He swallowed his concern, not needing to worry yet, as he walked up to your family. He waited for them to finish their conversation before he tapped on Toto’s shoulder. Immediately, Toto turned around to meet Kimi’s worried eyes.

“Kimi, is there something wrong?” Toto asked, sensing Kimi’s anxiousness, but chalking it up to the upcoming race. “Is it the race?”

“No…I mean, kind of?” Kimi answered but immediately contradicted himself. It was much more different talking to Toto about you than about racing. Despite knowing that both of your parents are aware of your relationship, he tried his best to only talk to Toto about racing whenever they were on the track. This was a first for Kimi, and he just did not know how he wanted to go about asking. Finally, after receiving multiple uneasy looks from Susie and Toto, Kimi took a deep breath before just deciding to go for it. “Do you know where she is? She’s not answering my texts or calls, and I’m getting worried.”

“Oh, Kimi, she’s sick,” Susie jumped in. She knew exactly who he wanted to know about, so she showed him a text from you that said you took some medicine and would try to sleep it off. “She’s been sick almost all week. I thought she told you.”

“Oh, have she sent any updates recently? Do you know how she’s feeling?” Kimi rushed. Looking back, he realized that every time he texted you, it would have been late back at home, so it made sense that you did not respond. Plus, to add the sickness on top of it? He felt like shit for not catching it earlier.

“That was the last text I received,” Susie said, sadly. Toto stepped away as he got a call, leaving Kimi and Susie to talk while Jack was distracted by Mick. “It was sent a few hours ago, so she might be awake now. You could call her?”

“No need,” Toto said as he walked back over, holding out the phone to Kimi. “Someone wants to talk to you.”

Hesitantly, Kimi took the phone and saw your name as the caller ID. He looked back up at Toto and Susie as they turned their backs to him and walked toward the pit wall to give him a little privacy. Immediately, Kimi raised the phone to his ear, “Amore (love)? How are you feeling? I heard you were sick. Are you staying hydrated?”

He gets cut off hearing you giggle lightly before descending into a light coughing fit. He smiled lightly for a second before growing concerned once again when he heard you cough. “Slow down, liebe (love). I am feeling better, just a few coughs here and there.”

“That didn’t sound like ‘a few coughs here and there,’” He mocked lightheartedly but in all seriousness. 

“That’s because you triggered it,” you laughed again. This time, able to hold back the coughs, just needing to clear your throat before you talk again. “I promise, I’m doing better. I wouldn’t lie to you.”

“As long as you’re feeling better,” He sighed, knowing you’re alright now. Off to the side, he sees his race engineer looking for him, so he realizes that he needs to wrap up the call with you to race. “Keep resting, amore. I have to go race now, but I’ll call you after, I promise.”

“I’ll be watching, liebe,” you smiled to yourself, and Kimi could hear it too. “Good luck, Kimi. Give the phone back to my dad, please?”

With that, he walked up to Toto again to hand him the phone before disappearing with his engineer. Toto raised the phone, chuckling lightly at Kimi’s rush as he greeted his daughter. 

“Can I be on the first flight out? I feel better.”

~~

Kimi had a horrible sprint race. He was already starting in 10th because he was on pole for the feature race, but he became collateral damage in a fight between a couple of cars further back. It was the last lap too! They were all outside the points, so there really was no point in racing that hard. However, that’s what happened. 

He did his best to hide his disappointment as he walked past the engineers to the driver’s room he shared with Ollie, who was already there because of a tire blowout from one of the earlier laps. Kimi started changing out of his race suit and into his normal clothes, just wanting to sleep the race off. 

“Your phone went off a few minutes ago,” Ollie said, breaking the silence and catching Kimi’s attention as he threw a Mercedes shirt over his head. “And don’t blame yourself. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Plus, it’s not like this race mattered. You already won the championship, we won the team championship, and you have a seat for next year.”

“Thanks, Ollie, but that’s not the point,” Was he lying? Partly, but there was some truth. He was upset at the race result, but he was also still slightly bummed that you were not there. Thinking of you, he wanted to call you.

Kimi looked through his bag for his phone, finding it with no problems. He noticed the number of notifications, but the only one that mattered to him was the one from you. It was a few minutes prior and it read, “I’m so sorry liebe! That crash was nasty, I hope you’re okay. I just took more medicine, so I might be asleep by the time you finish post-race media. I’ll call you when I wake up. Ich liebe dich (I love you).”

He sent a quick response, telling you he was alright and he loved you. Then, he went about the rest of his day. And the rest of his night. And the next morning. At that point, he started getting nervous again since you were not responding again. What kind of medicine were you taking that knocked you out for 12 hours, he thought. 

He wanted to go back to your parents again, but the feature race prep was different compared to the sprint. He did not have the same break he did with the sprint. Ever since he got to the track, he was warming up and prepping for the final race. He was nervous given the result the day before. He did not want to end the season on a double DNF, especially when he was going to get an F1 seat the following season in a Mercedes. He had to score well in the race.

If he had found a way to get to the Mercedes garage, he would have seen you sitting with your brother while your parents had a last-minute meeting. And if Kimi had been in any other starting position, he would have seen you walk into the Prema garage with Jack. Pole position was different though because they needed to do more interviews and promo pictures. If Kimi could have seen around his car from his grid box, he would have seen you sitting on the pit wall.

The race started without a hitch, Kimi was back in his groove, and it was clear to see that he was confident in his moves again. Sure, he was not fighting anyone for position, but there were a couple of times when he had to defend. He did so perfectly, and it made people wonder if the sprint race was just a one-off day for him. It was all worth it when he crossed the finish line first again.

The team immediately ran to Parc Ferme to wait for the cars as they scored a Prema 1-2. Kimi pulled into the first spot, Ollie into the second, and Victor in the third. Ollie and Victor jumped out of their cars immediately, running to their teams, but Kimi took a minute. This win should have felt good, especially after the disaster that was the sprint race, but it didn’t.

It was fun to win, but he was going to have to jump out of the car and celebrate with his team. Just his team. This is the first race you were not going to be there celebrating with him, and he would rather delay the inevitable. 

You could feel his hesitance to get out of the car, so you handed Jack over to your parents as you pulled up your mask and pushed through the people to get to the gate. You got there relatively easily considering you went through the Prema team, and they knew you would be the first person he’d want to see.

Kimi finally climbed out and stood on top of his car, posing for the camera momentarily. Then, his attention shifted to his team, and he froze. You were there! He’d recognize those eyes anywhere! Of course, you made it. He jumped off of the car and flung himself over the barrier to wrap you in his arms.

“You made it. I can’t believe you made it,” He whispered over and over, not even bothering to question if you could hear him through his helmet. That’s when he remembered, so he pulled back to take his helmet and balaclava off as well as his gloves. He put the back of his hand against your forehead to check your temperature, causing you to laugh. “Don’t laugh at me! I’m seeing if you’ve got a fever.”

“I’m all good, my fever broke yesterday,” You consoled as you pulled his hand off of your forehead to hold it as you kissed his cheek through your mask. “I’m all good. The mask is just a precaution.”

“Screw precaution, I wanna kiss you,” Kimi whined as he pulled the mask down to give you a long kiss. Despite not actually hearing it, the team all started clapping and F1 TV definitely got a good shot of you two. When he pulled away, he put the mask back on for you as he leaned his head against yours. “I still can’t believe you’re here.”

“You couldn’t keep me away even if you tried,” You whispered back, leaning up to bump your nose against his, “I’ll always find a way to be here for you.”

~~~~~

© BAD268 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.

[olderthannetfic]

I love that people who write het in my fandom on the fanfic site in my language tag their works as gen... and by love I mean hate. If I can accurately tag my slash as maleslash, why can't they?

I know this is stupid to get annoyed at, but I can't shake off the feeling that to them being straight is the default and therefore they don't need to tag it specifically. :/ Or maybe they think the romantic aspect of their fics is not enough to tag it as het? But then again, one fic I'm scrolling by now has "love story" as a genre and the summary describes a romantic storyline but still has gen as the pairing type despite the couple being m/f, so... meh :/

I wish fanfiktion.net was more like AO3. (Also wish you could hide your fics from search engines, that would be so neat, so fewer randos look at stuff from googling the characters' names. I just changed two names in a summary to their initials so people won't find the fic by accident because that makes me uncomfortable lol.)

--

Hi, just sent in an ask complaining about a fanfic website in a different language than english. I fear I accidentally wrote that it's fanfiction.net, which it isn't. It's fanfiktion.de and I blame my brain's confusion on the weather because it's too hot outside. Sorry!

Haha. I knew what you meant.

They absolutely see it as the neutral and unmarked default... just like people did on FFN and many a past archive.

AO3's wealth of m/m (and f/f relative to other sites, actually) is partly due to who founded it, but it's also due to one being able to filter out het. Unconsciously, everyone who doesn't see het as the standard for normalcy recognizes that AO3 is for them.

[phoenix--flying]

We (read: I) need to talk about Silena Beauregard, because I fear this fandom hates one of her most interesting (to me) traits, because why do we hate her being the spy? I see so many people trying to justify it and make reasons for how Luke manipulated her. Why can't she just. Be mad.

"But she said Luke-" she was also dying. She could've minced her words, and didn't think about how it would come across. Did Luke manipulate her into joining or did he manipulate her into staying? And yes, I know, Luke is a horrible person, groomer, etc, whatever else his antis say I don't pay attention to them.

But can we just talk about the possibility that Silena joined because she wanted to? That maybe Luke saw she was mad, took that and was pushing her to join? That maybe she wasn't so vain as to see a pretty boy and betray her camp for him?

Also, do you think we would've gotten the focus on Beckendorf looking at a photo of her, her reaction to his death, her and Clarisses friendship, etc if it wasn't build up to her being a spy? She would've just. Been there, if she wasn't. Like Lee Fletcher, or Michael Yew. They had their roles, but oops they're dead, no other character traits.

Plus, Silena being a spy introduces the possibility of there being other spies within the camp. Can you imagine finding out that one of the counselors, someone who's supposed to be responsible for an entire group of kids, someone who's supposed to be trusted and a role model, was working for Kronos? That shits devastating.

There's also, of course, the people that say she isn't a traitor. Because news flash, she is. Yes, she died a hero, she saved the camp, but in the end. She still betrayed them, she is a hero, but she is also a traitor. There's no argument there, plain and simple, she is a traitor. You wanna call Ethan a traitor? You have to call Silena a traitor, they aren't that different in that regard.

Her being a spy, also introduces us to the idea of her friends and siblings feeling betrayed. Not that anyone actually likes the one character we see who does that. Drew hating Silena for being a spy, is 100% valid, nobody can tell me otherwise. Does it excuse her being a bitch to her siblings? No! But she's a fucking child and her sister told everyone she was a traitor and then died. That's gotta hurt. It's also not just the fandom that villainizes Drew for hating Silena, it's Rick himself, which is insane.

He threw Piper into the Aphrodite cabin as this new kid, who didn't know Silena I'd like to mention, and fully just. Decided she knew what Silena would want, decided that Drew was wrong to hate her sister and that Silena did nothing wrong. Which is, bullshit in my opinion. The absolute audacity to come into this new place, hear about this girl through stories and then acting like you knew her personally??

And if you know me, you know I love Drew with my whole heart, but I say this 100% truthfully, she was wrong in how she ran the cabin. Do I think she was trying to put herself as far away from Silena as she possibly could? Yes. Do I think she was right to do that? No.

[two-crows-in-a-trenchcoat]

my thoughts on certain characters being the 'minister'

Peter Lukas - I think it's unlikely bc no jonah to make a wager with to get him off the boat so he's probably still at sea buutt if it was him think it would funny bc he'd definitely have 'disappeared' Collin just to not deal with him

Simon Fairchild - he wouldn't give a shit like we saw him with the extinction stuff he'd just not care about what the OIAR is doing at all and I think that would be funny

Annabelle Cane - that would be verryy plot relevant and also probably the same annabelle Cane from tma bc she said she'd either go with the fears or die and so far as I can remember they said there was no sign of her I would love a return of annabel mainly just bc I love her

Sasha James - more likely to be the new IT person but also I desperately just want sasha to be alive and well I also think she'd be very good at her job we knew she would have made a good archivist but an actual one rather than eldritch horror one so maybe she's a librarian somewhere completely separate

Tim Stoker - I strongly believe he wouldn't take it seriously and would flirt with every one and make jokes about the computers looking worse for wears until he hears about collin and just makes jokes about collin

Danny Stoker - would be funny but would also mean Tim is not linked to the supernatural at all bc he only got involved after Danny's death so if Danny's fine so is Tim and I need Tim to be ok also I think it would be a fun link without them just having the same cast as tma

Elias Buchard (the real one) - would imply gwen is a nepo baby which would be really funny to see them interact also wonder how jonah would feel about it also he was a stoner so I don't think he'd be good at his job and this would be very funny

Jurgen leitner - he's probably dead but I think this would be fun and we don't know if he even had his library in this world but if he did and then became the minister of the oiar that's a bad way to hide and I think he'd die pretty quickly

Daisy Tonner - she would penalise them for everything she'd be so strict on them and probably aggressive I also think its unlikely to be her she'd hate the bureaucracy and would probably empathise with collins solution to their problems

someone new - the fandom reaction would be funny as fuck like we've spent all this time theorising and guessing and then it's no one we've ever heard of before I just think it would be a funny way to throw off everyone

sorry this so long lmao

[yonaioana]

Okay first of all! I loved that request where is God reader from ennead! So!

What IS relationship with Egypt Gods with reader? The God of festivals and happiness but real role is the God of freedom? So as I read that request it says that he DID have good relationship with them(I think) because he was in Egypt but not anymore? And they never talk anymore as he moved from Egypt where all god mostly where, why did he move away from them? Did he knew what will happend?

So my request is about male reader God of festivals and happyness/ God of freedom.

How would they react to seeing reader once more? But there is plot twist! The reader is not kinda happy about seeing them.( I love angst, dont mind me)

That all!

Heeey im back, im sorry I was gone all this time I moved, finished highschool and now im struggling to finish my first year of college but im back and im trying to get through my entire inbox and write for everything I missed, I will also update the masterlist with a few new fandoms. This is a short one i still had in my drafts. Kisses!!!

I guess that as the god of freedom and happiness ennead is not the best place to live. Since all the gods have to obey Ra and her kinda liking the suffering of everyone else cause she sees it as entertainment would not sit well with a god who's entire concept is boring to her.

I dont think that you would have beef with any of them other than Ra and maybe Osiris if you try to call out his bluff of being the victim and all that. You could have some trouble with Seth if you tried to opose him in his early years when he ruled Egipt but i dont think he is the kind to try and hurt other gods. Cause he tried to hurt Isis and Horus only because of some prophecy not because he really hated them. So my guess is that you either tried to vouch for someone who was in trouble or did something to upset Ra but she just pushed you aside and continued as if you were not there. Or you found out about some of the things Osiris did to Seth and you tried to tell everyone but because nobody really liked Seth they only listened to what Osiris said and called you a liar, ultimately pushing you aside. So you got sick and tired of them and left.

Anyway back to the present Horus and Anubis actually like you cause they're not as old as the other gods so either they were not born when you left or they were too young to remember. If we take the first route Ra will not be verry pleased to see you but if we take the second one Isis and Osiris are the ones in a sour mood.

Lets say that after you left you found yourself a village on the other side of Egipt where it was like a port so there was a big mix of cultures and instead of asserting dominance as a god you just lived among them helping out and being nice to everyone. Of course horus while searching for Seth could happen to accidentally find your little comunity and asks Isis about it wich leads to the others finding you and dragging you back to explain yourself and interogate you on the "where is seth" matter. While at first you were happy thinking they came to visit it was auickly shut down when chains apeared around your neck, wrists and ankles and you were being dragged away from your home and people back to ennead. If you knew about what happened to seth osiris will try to keep you quiet one way or another, gods forbid you helped him escape or helped him while he was on the run with resources and hiding from the others, in the I feel like horus will try to take you with him against his mom's dissaproval to help him heal seth emotionally with your powers

[hpalways]

Pining Over You

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Characters: Gojo Satoru, Geto Suguru x GN!Reader

Warnings: None!

Gojo Satoru

In all his days of living, he had never met someone like you. In his 28 years on this planet, he experienced a lot, but somehow, none of them compared to the person whose name melted at the tip of his tongue -- yours, [Surname] [Name]. And he wasn't sure what to do about it.

He was Gojo Satoru. The strongest jujutsu sorcerer, and he always knew that. So why was he getting caught up by a nobody like you?

Well, you weren't exactly a nobody. You were a fellow sorcerer, a grade 1 sorcerer actually. You were quite capable in this society, withholding enough support during missions and ensuring everyone's safety.

Somehow, even though you weren't the strongest sorcerer, like him, everyone always grew more confident and comfortable when you arrived to the scene of the battle.

He wondered how you did that.

He actually hated you at first, annoyed by how bossy and sure you were at your job. But somewhere in the lines of hate, he found himself thinking about you, his interest never once waning. He found himself thinking about your smile, your optimism, and your quiet strength. He would worry when you would not show up for a while after a certain risky mission, and feel his bones itch to go try and save you. Then, he would feel stupid as shit when you do end up showing, safe from harm and carefree as day.

Thus, the cycle repeated.

"What? Are you here to try to tell me to do my job again?" you asked him, standing there in the dark alley to exorcise curses. Your words didn't attack him necessarily -- actually, you seemed to be quite amused, your lips curved into a lopsided smile.

That was the thing. His disdain for you in the beginning was not met. You always greeted him kindly, not at all offended by his petty behavior. Maybe it was because you kept it up professional, drawing this invisible line to stop him. After all, you were the bigger person.

"Now why would I do that? I would never do that to you," he said, scoffing.

"Okay buddy." Your brows raised.

His body moved on its accord. His fingers hovered in the air for a moment, before reaching your [h/c] hair.

"What is it?" you asked, eyes growing wide.

He didn't realize how close he suddenly got to you, your breath intermingling, one and the same. "There was something in your hair."

Your lips were close -- the very same lips he envisioned kissing. Just one lean in and the gap would be closed. His heartbeat pounded in his chest, so loud he could swear you would hear.

No, no, no. He could not let these feelings be known.

He was the strongest sorcerer -- you were a nobody... his nobody.

That was a recipe spelled for disaster.

He pulled away, only wishing to be pulled in by your warmth again. He wished... oh how he wished. What was the point of being the strongest if he couldn't give into his desires? What was the point of it all if he couldn't be embraced by you? There were too many expectations... too many rules... that he never used to mind, but now, all was changed.

"Thank you," you told him, grinning as bright as the sun.

His ears felt hot, so he turned his head away. He wished you didn't grin brightly as such. It was undeserved.

Geto Suguru

The woes of his technique were having to sink to the ocean floor, buried in the mass of curses he was forced to ingest. It was a dark and lonely atmosphere, lack of life and companionship.

And that was when he let it loose, exhausted of the bonds that kept his down as a jujutsu sorcerer.

Because why... must he serve to these monkeys? All they added to this world was the endless mounds of curses. It was disgusting.

But you...

How did you sneak up on him like this? He could not, would not, dare not give into the temptations that you had caused him. What kind of torment were you dealing him with?

You were not a jujutsu sorcerer. You were a mere human, a catalyst for curses. He should hate you. And he would hate you.

The few times he tried to kill you, for the sake of his lifelong dream, he could not. What made you different than any other? So what was stopping him from doing the deed? It was despicable, making him sick of himself, from how weak he was.

"Suguru..." you said, smiling softly, your voice a gentle melody to his ears. Your fingers wove into his long, dark strands, twisting them into one another, into a braid. "Did you have a good day today?"

He nodded slowly, thinking back to the process he made with Yuta. It was getting closer and closer, though not quite there yet. And he was fine with that. He was a patient man. "It's been fine." He glanced your way, imagining the curve of his fingers wrapping around your neck to squeeze the life out of you. Then it flipped like a switch, and suddenly he found himself imagining himself kissing you and cradling you into his arms.

Fuck. Hurling his head away, he clenched his hands so tight his knuckles grew white.

That one fateful day. Where you arrived at his front steps, pleading, begging for a place to stay. You were near homeless, going through it with the loss of your job and home. He should have killed you then and there. But the look in your eyes... they reminded of his... this longing and desperation to escape your doom.

And still, no curse brought upon you, because for some reason, you didn't let the past catch up to you, thankful for each and every day.

You were even thankful to him.

He wished he never took you in, thinking it would make no difference, considering he was going to use you and then kill you.

Because that had left him a dilemma.

The dilemma of wanting you.

[thoseyoulove]

Reacting to The Vampire Lestat - Part III (with a bit of spoilers)

I like Gabrielle.

I'm not sure I love her, but I really like her.

I feel wrong using feminine pronouns with her, though. I feel like Gabrielle is whispering in my ear that is they/them. Like, I've never had a headcanon so strong before? I don't know about labels, but for me those are the pronouns Gabrielle would use. It's just so clear to me.

I won't use them because the book doesn't do it, the fandom doesn't do it, which I'm not criticizing because it isn't exactly 'official', so it wouldn't be real canon to... But I feel like if the books were released today, it would be. And I hope the show changes that and we can gradually adjust too.

I hope that when they write season 3, they show signs of her gender dysphoria even before she says something explicit like the "you're the man in me" conversation. I want lines that imply that, I want a look in her eyes and expressions on her face whenever she gets gender envious of guys or has to do something "feminine". The book doesn't do a lot of that because Lestat is the narrator and he is away from her, so we barely see her before the transformation/'transition' but the show has the opportunity to explore more of it and I hope they use it.

Gabrielle was born to be a vampire. I think she would nail it even without Lestat's counseling. It's just second nature for her. You go, bruh!

Gabrielle actually seems to be more fun and even affectionate than I expected? I was worried that she'd might be too confident, powerful, badass, empowered etc that she would feel cold and emotionless, because that's usually what happens with characters like these and I hate that... But so far it hasn't been the case.

She really blossomed with vampirism. Feels like she is finally getting the opportunity to have the life she was meant to live.

The only downside is the hair. That moment with the hair was so visceral. I feel bad for her. Imagine being stuck with a hair you hate and gives you body dysphoria forever. I hope the show lets her hair be short. Like, maybe her illness affected her hair or something. Or at least give her hairstyles that make it look shorter than it really is. Or make her cut it every day. I don't care. Let the dude have short hair! Period.

Lestat's reaction to all this is like... Mixed feelings. He doesn't love it. Which, I get it, all his life he knew her as a "woman". It can be weird adjusting to that, it may feel like you're losing someone. But there are these gentle moments when he separates accessories (if I remember it correctly, rings) that are masculine for her because he figures she would prefer them and when he says he'll cut her hair every night if she wants to, so it's more of unlearning and grieving what/who he thought was 'real' and adapting to a new reality. It's not an "okay, let's go!" reaction as if nothing happened, specially for the time being (1700s), it's complicated, but he seems to be open. I can't speak for everyone who is trans and/or under the non-binary umbrella, but it was human to me and I have no problems with it.

Alright, so whether it was incestuous before or not, now it clearly is. I do hope it started now and not when they were human, though.

She was my mother, my fledgling, my child (sort of), my roommate, basically the only friend I had and my lover. I mean, not exactly, but I thought the joke was funny.

I feel like if I talk about the incest, it has to be on another post because it would probably take too long. There are way too many things to talk about and I'm still approaching the middle of the book.

Let's just say it sort of makes works with how the book, the characters, this species and universe are written. I can sort of get it, at least for now. Is it necessary? No. Would the show suffer if they don't do the incest? Not all. Is it random, irrelevant, only for shock value and because "let's get nasty freaky and controversial these are vampires and this is gothic horror grow up cupcakes deal with it hahaha"? Also no! It has some kind of logic. But I feel like Lestat and Gabrielle are already layered enough with their parent/child/maker/fledgling/sort of envious of each other (including the fact they're both gender nonconforming to some extent) dynamic on its own, that there's plenty to cover here without incest. Still, if the show goes there (and I'm afraid they will), I also expect it to make sense and not be just for the sake of being seual, weird and controversial. I believe Rolin is too good to write something that mediocre and poor. So, I can live without it, but I'm also trusting the show to do whatever their thing is. Let's see, I guess.

Also, at least at the moment, it's not as big as people make it out to be. Again, to talk about this properly I'd need another post, but it's not like they sleep together, they're head over heels in love with each other or anything. Like I said, there's some logic that is kind of complicated to explain here, but it's not that radical and it's not that often. Sometimes I even genuinely and wholeheartedly forget about it. Fortunately, there are way too many other (and more) interesting things going on to focus on.

Gabrielle learning about her powers is really fun too, maybe even more fun than Lestat since she's such a natural at this whole thing.

And their maker/fledgling dynamic is entertaining as well.

She's like, climbing walls, jumping from roofs etc like a cat, just having the time of her life and while Lestat gets pretty adventurous and experimental with his powers too, it's not as much? Gabrielle takes it to the next level (good for her).

Like, sometimes he has to stop Gabrielle like a father with his kid, like "CAN WE PLEASE JUST GO HOME WE CAN DO MORE TOMORROW" and it's simply hilarious.

Stop it, Lestat, let Gabrielle HAVE FUN!

Gabrielle just gives major Cat Woman vibes. Now I need Cat Woman-esque scenes on the show with her climbing and jumping between buildings etc. WE HAVE SO MUCH POTENTIAL AND THE VISION IS CO CLEAR. Do it, Rolin!

It's cool that Lestat finally has some real company and someone with whom he can be open about being a vampire.

Loneliness is the biggest thing for him on the show and I have a feeling it's the same thing on the books. And it's even worse here, because there are moments where he is completely alone and in so much pain (and we haven't seen that on the show yet). Having Gabrielle around made things better for him and he hasn't cried in a little while (and he was crying A LOT on those first two chapters, for very understandable reasons), so this was a nice turn for him and the story.

I also think he enjoys being her mentor, like it gives him a sense of purpose and pride. Reminds me of how he talked about the way he felt at the monastery. And it's sweet to see him teaching Gabrielle stuff.

And sometimes he feels like an old and tired single dad and it's just funny. Like, Gabrielle is ready to create the vampire Olympics and win gold for every single sport and he just wants to sleep. Lestat is too much and loves playing around, but Gabrielle is too much even for HIM. Imagine having more energy than the actual ADHD child. What a legend. They're hilarious. A lot of room to play with humor with these two and I hope they use it.

P.S. Nothing is permanent, opinions might change and this is based on Lestat’s narration, which can be unreliable. I’m reading the books so I can find out more about the characters, what potential events might happen in the show, what I can expect etc. This is my favorite show in the universe, so I want to be as informed as possible. I have no idea if I’ll become a legit fan of the books or not, but so far I’m enjoying it. I’m posting these comments only for fun.

[lesvegas]

absolutely bonkers reactions from the fallout fandom. The only criticisms I'm seeing are from fnv fans who are rightfully calling the show out on its poor world-building. But that apparently means we're 'toxic and pretentious'. really cant win with these people smh 🤦

It's incredibly baffling. I mean I always knew there'd be an uncritical crowd that would overlook any and all flaws because they only really care about the same things Bethesda does (cool power armour! cool guns! cool explosions!) but the fact that it seems to be... almost EVERYONE? Is so fucking weird. I went to nma to see what their consensus is because despite how awful the site is they're also one of the few groups that actually criticize Bethesda Fallout but even THEY liked it. Even after watching the end of season one. They didn't really seem to care about the 'twist' or problems when I expected them of all people to tear the show a new one.

I knew most of the critics would be FNV fans, I just didn't expect us to be the *only* critics. It almost made me think hey, maybe it really *isn't* that bad and it's critically acclaimed for a reason, but... no, watching it just kinda hurts. A friend of mine who genuinely loves fo4 also hated it. In fact all of my friends who have seen it hate it, despite the wider reaction. It's an odd feeling.

[queen-haq]

Fic: Never You (Penelope x Colin) - Part 2

Rating: R

Fandom: Bridgerton (TV show)

Spoilers: S3 scene released yesterday.

Summary: They may have been friends once but his callous words decimated their relationship. Determined not to have anything to do with him, Penelope is ready to move on. But Colin isn’t giving up, not at all. Friends or not, they are connected for life - and he intends to remind her of that.

Excerpt:

“You would hate me for not wanting to court you. You would be that selfish?”

“Of course you would think that.”

“What else is this if not punishment?”

Masterlist (contains links to Part 1 and my other stories)

Chapter 2

Penelope sipped her cup of lemonade, scanning the crowd in front of her. They were at Lady Hathaway’s ball, another social engagement in a series of endless ones, and she was bored. Whereas these events served a purpose in the past, now she was no longer in search of a husband or gossip. The gatherings weren’t all work however, there were many an evening when Eloise and she would die from laughter at others frivolity. And then there were the dances. Penelope loved to dance but she wasn’t very popular and not many gentlemen asked her to partner. Often Colin would be the only one. A part of her knew his invites were more for her benefit than his but she always assumed he enjoyed their moments together as well - but now that she knew how embarrassed he was to be seen with her, she cringed at those memories.

“Good evening, Pen. Enjoying yourself?”

She almost choked on the liquid at Colin’s unexpected appearance beside her. She thought he would avoid her company, hoped for it actually after their last conversation at the park, but there he was. Stubbornly she took another sip, refusing to speak to him.

“You look lovely tonight.”

She rolled her eyes.

“As pleasing as the new wardrobe is, I must admit it’s your hair that is most… intriguing.”

In her peripheral vision she saw his eyes roaming over her, and every nerve in her body tensed. It was difficult to breathe. For as long as she’d known him, she loved him. Being flushed and breathless around Colin was nothing new, but there was something different about the reaction he evoked in her now. There was no longer a soft, sweet warmth that enveloped her. Instead something dark and caustic surged through her, a swirl of tumultuous emotions that left her reeling with confusion when he watched her in the strange, new fashion that he had at the park and now. It probably had something to do with the anger she felt towards him but it wasn’t just that. She didn’t understand it, she didn’t like it, and she needed it to stop. 

“Oh, you’d like to know how I am?” Colin continued, unfazed by her silence. “Quite well, actually. London air has been surprisingly refreshing, although I’m still not fond of the rain.”

“I do not wish to discuss the weather with you, Mr. Bridgerton,” she replied stiffly, straightening her back while her eyes remained fixated on the flood of people circling the dance floor.

“Then what shall we discuss?” he mused. “Would you like to hear about the gifts I brought back for everyone? Or would you rather share more about your time in the country?”

“I would not.”

“Alright, let’s discuss your falling out with Eloise. My sister refuses to speak on it but maybe I can pry the truth from your lips.”

“You’d be foolish to try.”

“How about a dance then? Would you join me for a waltz?”

“No.”

“Fine. Quadrille it is.”

Irritated, she turned to find him smirking at her. Her heart pounded in her chest seeing the wicked glint in his eyes, the mischievous tilt of his lips as he deliberately goaded her. “You’re trying to provoke me.”

“Is it working?” he asked with a cheeky smile.

“I won’t be indulging your whims, Colin.”

He pouted at her. “How unfortunate.” Eyes glued to her face, he drank from his cup. “Shall I take a turn about the room, Pen? Perhaps I’ll run into Lady Portia and ask her if she’ll arrange a dance for the two of us.”

Pen quirked her eyebrow. “I certainly won’t stop you from dancing with Mama if that’s what your heart desires.”

Colin laughed heartily, and instantly Penelope noticed Lord Fife and some of the other gentlemen glancing at them. And they weren’t the only ones. Nearby were Eloise and Cressida Cowper, watching her with disdain. Feeling self-conscious at all the attention they were drawing, Penelope stilled. “I’ve asked you to leave me alone, Mr. Bridgerton.”

His sigh was heavy with resignation. “I see we’re back to unpleasantries.”

“I don’t understand why you’re here. Aren’t you worried about Lord Fife and his gaggle laughing at you?”

“I don’t give a damn about what he says.”

“That’s certainly not true.”

The easy smile on his face dissolved, replaced with an intensity that held her transfixed. Regret loomed over his features. “I am truly sorry, Pen. I shouldn’t have said what I said. I wish I could tell you there was a reason why I behaved so foolishly but I can’t. I was intoxicated, yes, but that doesn’t excuse my behavior.” He took a step closer, his hands tantalizingly close to her own gloved ones. “I will do anything to earn your forgiveness. Please. Just tell me what you need.”

They were in a ballroom crowded with people but all she saw was Colin standing in front of her, his eyes soft and pleading, voice trembling with emotion. Yes he hurt her, wounded her so deeply that she spent weeks in despair trying to understand how he could be so cruel, but seeing him so torn up made her recognize he was sincerely apologetic. If she was honest with herself about that fateful encounter, what devastated her the most wasn’t him putting her down in front of others, but the sinking realization that he never really could love her. And that wasn’t his fault. It wasn’t fair to be angry at him for not reciprocating her feelings because love was not something that could be forced or demanded. And despite their newly fractured relationship, they were close friends once and she didn’t want him to continue suffering because of her. “I forgive you.”

Stunned, he stared at her. “You do?”

“Yes. We’ve both been unkind but it doesn’t serve any purpose to hold on to that pain.” She offered him a smile. “So you needn’t worry, Colin. Everything’s resolved between us.”

The cloud of worry departed from his face, his lips broke into a mischievous smile. “Does this mean I can have the next dance?”

She paused, her stomach twisting into coils. “Our friendship, Colin, it complicates things. It makes everything more difficult and…” Wringing her fingers together, she glanced down at her hands. “You’ll be traveling soon and I’ll be moving away from London once I’m married. We won’t see each other often and it wouldn’t be appropriate for us to exchange letters then. I wouldn’t want my husband or others to misconstrue things.” She looked up at him through her lashes. “It’s best if we end our friendship now.”

Before he could respond, they were interrupted by Eloise and Cressida.

“Colin, Penelope,” Eloise greeted them, her demeanor markedly cold as she turned to Pen. “Brother, I’m quite parched. Would you bring me some lemonade? Cressida will accompany you.”

“I would love to hear more about your travels,” Cressida cooed.

Jaw clenched, Colin kept his eyes centered on Penelope. “Pen and I are in the middle of a conversation.”

“Colin, be a gentleman!” Eloise chastised.

“It’s alright. We’re done speaking.” Penelope felt his keen stare upon her, he refused to budge, but it seemed to finally dawn on him that Eloise was not going anywhere. Reluctantly he walked away, with Cressida alongside him.

“Leave my brother alone.” Eloise’s words were saturated with heated rage. “Colin doesn’t know what you’re capable of, the damage you’ve caused to him and the rest of our family. He doesn’t deserve to be hurt by you.”

“Then you should tell him to keep his distance,” Penelope snapped back, and then regretted her tone instantly. “Eloise, I know you’re angry at me but you must know I would never deliberately cause Colin any harm.”

“You already have.” The pain in Eloise’s eyes was evident, causing a tidal wave of shame and guilt within Penelope. “Do you think he could ever forgive you if he knew the truth about who you are? He would hate you. We both know that.”

“Then maybe you should tell him.”

Eloise shook her head ‘no’. “I would never do that to my brother. He holds you in high esteem, the truth would break his heart. Like you broke mine.”

She stormed away, leaving Penelope staring after.

Her words weighed heavily on Pen’s mind, and she desperately needed air to compose herself. Her stride was quick as she made her way out of the ballroom, walking towards the large garden. There were some guests scattered around the grounds but as she went deep into the maze on the property, she found herself alone in a private corner behind the hedges.

For a long time she pondered Eloise’s words, the accusations echoing in her mind. As much as she’d tried to defend herself, Eloise was not interested in forgiving her. And deep down Penelope knew she didn’t deserve it. Her actions had hurt others, especially the Bridgertons, and even though she had only written about them to protect them, the end result was still the same.

Yet there was a part of her that didn’t regret her actions, because Colin was living the life he wanted and Eloise was no longer under suspicion.

Most of all, Lady Whistledown had given Penelope the kind of freedom she had never imagined. A voice to speak her mind and leave a mark in the small word she inhabited, and enough money to secure a healthy future. It was selfish of her but she didn’t care. She was Lady Whistledown and she was proud of it.

“You’ve been lying to me, Pen.”

She turned around immediately. Colin was only a few feet away, moonlight shining brightly upon him. He’d always towered over her, but standing there to his full height he looked regal and statuesque. While he’d never been a wallflower, there was something intrinsically shy about him from living in the shadows of his formidable father and brothers. He had indicated as much in his letters and in some of their private conversations. But the Colin from their recent encounters, the one staring at her now, appeared to be a different person. More confident, sure of himself. And it was reflected in his poise and gait as he sauntered closer. His thumb was pressed against the palm of his other hand, idly stroking his skin, as if in deep thought.

“You should not be here,” she replied. “If someone were to come upon us-”

“Your betrothed would not approve?”

“There would be a scandal!”

“Yes, of course.” There was wry amusement in his voice, his blue eyes twinkling. “I’ve been making discreet inquiries about your activities, amongst friends and others. I even approached Mrs. Varley and your mama earlier, and they both confirmed my suspicions.” He dipped his head to the side. “Albeit inadvertently.” Eyebrow quirked up, he sent her a teasing smile. “There’s not been any hint of a suitor, Pen. None at all.”

She peered at him, horrified.

“There is no engagement is there, Pen?” He came to a stop in front of her. “You lied to me. And I need to know why.”

Red hot anger coursed through her veins, she was so enraged that every sense of propriety and decorum left her brain. “You arrogant prick!” She charged at him. “How dare you?”

Before she could shove him away he gripped her hands, forcibly holding her tightly in his arms.

“Is it that difficult for you to imagine someone would want me? That there is a man out there who could love me and want to marry me? You find that so inconceivable, Colin?” Her breath grew ragged as she tried to break free from his grip. “Did it never occur to you-”

“You don’t get to end our friendship, Pen.” His eyes were dark and volatile, so deep that every moment she held his stare felt like sinking into the abyss. It was she who had lost her temper but now it was Colin who looked untethered, clinging to her. “You don’t get to walk away from us.”

Her heart beat thunderously in her chest, her stomach in knots as she realized she was trapped against him. There was no escape. He was occupying every inch of space, filling her senses with his scent, overwhelming her with his presence as his close proximity wreaked havoc with her insides.

“You are my friend.” Colin’s voice vibrated with raw, desperate urgency that shook her to the core. “My confidante.” Lips parted, his gaze trailed down to her mouth, down the length of her neck, settling on the highs of her breasts. No one had ever looked at her with such ferocity before, making her feel utterly exposed. “You’re…” His voice trailed off, like he couldn’t finish his thoughts; he was distracted, caught up in his world. Suddenly his hand was on her neck, the other wrapping around the back of her head. Frozen in his arms, she was simply too enthralled to move. His long lean fingers traced along her skin, searing through her heaving breasts, until his index finger hooked along the neckline of her dress.

It was such a simple thing, his finger tucked into the cleavage of her dress, but her body burned at his touch. She couldn’t take it any longer, unravelling in front of him as wetness gushed between her legs.

“Have you always been like this, Pen?”

She swallowed audibly. “Like what?”

His left hand loosened its hold on the back of her head, shifting so that his thumb now traced the contours of her lip. His gaze met hers, her body trembled. The complexity of emotions in his eyes was unsettling, she didn’t understand it at all. Why was he doing this to her? Why was he making her feel so completely vulnerable?

“So disagreeable,” he murmured, his soft breath humming against her skin.

And then just as she decided enough was enough and she needed to make her escape, his mouth closed over hers.

To be continued...

A/N - As always, feedback is loved and cherished, and encourages the muse to write faster :)

If you'd like to be added to the taglist, please drop me a note/comment.

[veetowervaporwave]

Man I am so vanilla when it comes to ships in Hazbin...

Staticmoth: The epitome of toxic old men yaoi. They're just the worst. They push each other's buttons. They both have obsessions on the side but both want to be each other's center of attention. Other people's suffering gets them horny. They got married three times and divorced five times. They know exactly how horrible the other one is but it only makes them more attracted to each other. They're so toxic it's a health hazard for everyone around them. I wish nothing more than for them to die horribly while holding hands.

Chaggie: I've been shipping them since the pilot and I'll be real they were everything I wanted and even more. I always knew that their relationship would be mostly background stuff since they're an established couple, and I was excited to have something where the main character is in a stable and affectionate relationship. I didn't expect them to get a whole little storyarc with the whole angel drama... I'm just. So happy. Seeing them, knowing how much they supported each other over the years when they had no one else on their side, openly working out their issues... They're just everything that's good in the world.

Huskerdust: I feel about it a bit more differently compared to the previous two. I'm happy to see them just do whatever, but Huskerdust stands out because its development is kind of... part of the plot of the show, rather than just being an extra layer to their characters. I'm not even interested in fanfiction for them because I'm too excited to see how it progresses in the actual show.

Radiorose: QPR goals. Alastor having someone he's so comfortable with honestly elevated his character for me. I don't have a lot to say but I enjoy seeing them together immensely.

Appledust: guilty pleasure comfort ship, refer to this post for more context.

Ships I like less under the cut, I try not to be too mean but still, be careful.

Radiostatic (Or, I guess, Onewaybroadcast, rather): I like it a lot but only when it caters to my superspecific tastes. First of all it needs to be one-sided. The second Alastor reciprocates I'm like *Lucifer voice* "Who is this? Who is this man?" Second of all the "hate" part of the "hateboner" is essential (unless we're talking before their falling out). Vox both wants Alastor and wants him dead. It's been swirling inside him for years and had poisoned whatever relationship they had beforehand. There's no turning back from this.

RoyalHalo: I don't know how to explain it, but when I personally ship something "platonically", it's different from just regular shipping and different from having a brotp. Nothing much to say on the ship itself, they're cute.

Cherrisnake: I wish I could like it more but "Meh" is right. I think it has potential, unfortunately 8 episodes a season didn't allow it to develop. I wish we could have had Cherri before ep6 to establish her relationships with Angel and Pentious and I wish they had at least one genuine conversation before the end of the season.

Alastor x Charlie & Alastor x Angel: actually it's not about the ships themselves, just some bad experiences in the early fandom. Ik not all the shippers are like that, especially now when those ships are less popular and a lot of people are vocal about not liking them, but unfortunately I don't think I'll ever be able to enjoy them.

Lute x Vaggie: Nothing to say I just don't like it.

Val x Angel: I put a black line because my knee jerk reflex was to think of people like. Ignoring the abuse, but thinking about it, I do enjoy the exploration of their relationship if it's in-character. It's just not something I personally would consider "shipping". (But then what makes it different from onewaybroadcast? Guess I'm just a hypocrite or something)

"Found family" is a term that's used very differently by different people in the fandom, which is a little confusing to me, so I changed this category to "maybe".

Alastor x Husk: Much like the previous one, except I trust people with it even less after all the victimblaming Husk got after ep5.

Velvette x Vox and/or Velvette x Valentino: I don't ship those personally just for the reason that Vel genuinely seems uninterested, but I support the people who do. Especially the polyvees shipping. There's also additional element to this for me personally is that if Val and Vox were an item, there's a fear that Vel would come off as a third wheel or be pushed to the side, and if they were all together this wouldn't happen. So I have no choice but to support, even if I myself can't get into it.

Guitarspear: Lute ripping off her arm to go help Adam... The last thing Adam does before death is smile at her... God. They were also very fun hypemen for each other during songs, and just the general dynamic was really funny. I would say I like this ship when I see it, but I won't go out of my way to look for it?

Carmilla x Zestial: They're friends... The fanart is nice to look at. It's fine.

Radioapple: I'm conflicted. I guess I am kinda interested in what their relationship would be like in the show, but in fanworks I mostly enjoy the "they aren't actually attracted to each other but everyone thinks they are" dynamic. It's funny.

Pentious x Emily: Ok, one (1) crackship. My friend ships them and I kinda see the vision? Could be cute.

[linawritestwst]

rollo x reader who's scared of magic headcanons (gn!reader)

so. here i am, writing this HJSJDJDSJ. but i actually wanted to write something with rollo for a long time and i thought that i can wait until this event ends.. but i'm too impatient, haha. also yeah, if you haven't read the event story yet, these headcanons are full of spoilers!

okay, so i probably should explain this concept. you see, i know that this fandom usually depicts mc as someone who is 100% against rollo's actions and wants to protect their friends AND THAT'S COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDABLE, but one day i sat there and was like.. "but what if mc wasn't like that". what if mc was so tired of everything and they were so traumatized because of everything that happened that they became scared of magic? what if they even hate it now? you can imagine the reader being someone who loved magic and was interested in it, but eventually became terrified of it because of their trauma or you can imagine them being someone who found this world too scary from the start. also, they don't like nrc students that much (but they don't want to admit it) and pretty much get a corruption arc, so if you don't want to read something like that.. you should probably skip this one.

if you want to read something similar (but more.. uh, comforting), but with other characters, feel free to check out my riddle, leona, azul and jamil x reader who's traumatized from overblots headcanons!

warnings: a mention of a panic/anxiety attack, a possibly unhealthy relationship dynamic, mc's behavior is also very similar to ptsd.

♡ you know that so many people would go "i wish it were me" if you told them about everything that happened with you in this world called twisted wonderland. come on, you have a cute cat sidekick (who acts more like a gremlin), you get to see so many pretty boys every day and this world also has magic! why wouldn't you want to stay here? sure, you miss your family and friends, but also you have to agree that this world is more fun than the one you came from. you agree, right, y/n?.. you wish you could say that you do, but you're not so sure anymore. living in twisted wonderland sounds fun, it really does, but you never felt so stressed and anxious in your entire life. you wanted to help these boys, you wanted to understand them, but you didn't want to become their therapist. you have your own problems, you just want to go back home already, you miss your loved ones! and as you kept trying to help everyone and you saw just how dangerous their magic can be.. you started to get more and more scared of it.

♡ you don't want to go to nbc at all at first. you don't find it as exciting as others do and you agree only because crowley told you that you might find out how to go back to your world there. and you knew well that crowley is most likely lying to you again, but.. what's the point in refusing to go? if you agree to visit the city of flowers, you won't find any hints there, but if you stay here, you also won't find any hints. you're tired of your dorm and this school in general, so maybe going to a new place will make you feel better. also you just want to get a break from seeing crowley's face every day and you sure hope that you won't find another student to take care of there.

♡ when you meet rollo for the first time, he feels like someone who's completely different from nrc students. sure, you can definitely feel that there's something.. off about him at first, but he seems like such a polite and caring person that you stop thinking about it at some point. but rollo officially gains your trust when he says that it must be tiring for you to be surrounded by magic users all the time. you don't think anyone from nrc has ever said such a thing to you, you know that they care about you, but most of the time it felt like you were just being used and people rarely asked you about your own feelings. honestly, you feel like you're about to cry when you hear those words from him but you try to stay calm. it's probably not a good idea to tell him about everything that you had to go through, you literally just met him! and why did he just say that he wants you to forget about your problems while you're here? this.. this doesn't feel right. why is he so nice to you?

♡ you notice that even though rollo is mostly nice to everyone here, he definitely treats you better than other students. you don't know the reason, but you're not sure that you even want to know it. yes, you've been manipulated quite a lot of times in the past, but.. you don't really have any energy to try and "see right through him". even if he just wants to use you, for some reason you just can't bring yourself to care. it's probably because you find people being genuinely nice to you more surprising than people manipulating you. so for now.. you want to believe that he really is just that kind. you have some very nice and interesting conversations with him and you find yourself enjoying spending time with him like this. you don't even want to go back to nrc students, haha.. it was a joke, but for some reason your anxiety comes back when you see their faces again. hm? what did rollo say just now? it sounded a bit like "those magic users.." but why did he say it in such an angry tone?

♡ you really want to have fun at the festival, but you just.. can't. you feel too tired, everyone is so loud and noisy and you can't focus on anything. you want to dance with everyone as well, but for some reason, when you see them having fun together.. you remember all the overblots, you remember all the times you had to do crowley's job, you remember all the tragic backstories that you had to listen to. but before you can stop thinking about all that and join them even though you can't even stand properly.. the fireworks start. you know that malleus just wants to make the townspeople happy and you agree that they deserve to have the best festival ever, but also, everything is even more loud now because everyone decides to join malleus. they even manage to turn this into a competition. haha, nrc students never change, do they? you wish you could laugh about it, but for some reason you can't even smile right now. what is wrong with you? why are you feeling like this? shouldn't you find these fireworks as beautiful as everyone does? these boys are trying so hard, you should compliment them for their efforts! grim and malleus especially want to hear compliments from you, considering that they're the ones who started it, but you can't say anything nice to them right now.

♡ for some reason, it gets harder for you to breathe and your head starts spinning. it's probably because the noise is too overwhelming for you, you could try and go somewhere more quiet but you can't just leave them here! but why.. why is everything so scary right now? you're so mad at yourself for not feeling as happy as everyone else, but after everything that you had seen, it's impossible for you to see magic as something good. you can't focus on anything else right now and your mind is screaming at you, begging you to run away and hide somewhere, but you still sit there and watch everyone. but you didn't know that somebody else has been watching you all this time too.

♡ you find it strange that the only thing that you can hear clearly right now is rollo telling malleus that if he and other students are so powerful, then they should use their magic more carefully. you feel so shocked, you didn't expect someone like him to say such a thing. it would be normal for someone like trein to say it, he's your professor, of course he would be worried and he would tell everyone to be more careful with their magic. and you already had a feeling that rollo is a very responsible person so you weren't surprised when you noticed that he doesn't really like the fireworks, but for him to say something like this.. you can't help but agree with him.

♡ after he's done talking to malleus, he wants to make sure that you're okay and when he looks at you, it becomes obvious to him that you're not okay at all. he sincerely apologizes to you for letting something like this happen and says that he should have noticed that you're not doing so well. rollo helps you find a little more calm and quiet place even though that's pretty hard to do right now because of the festival, but to be honest, you feel more safe already because of him. while you're trying to calm down and you're starting to breathe normally, rollo suddenly asks you, don't you think that magic is too dangerous and people can't just use it as carelessly as those students did? you can easily hurt someone with it and not all magic users can control it, some of them don't even try, they don't care what happens to other people. maybe this world would be better without magic users.. no, it would totally be better without them.

♡ he wants to hear your answer and you don't know what to say. no, actually, you do know what you want to say, but you're not strong enough to do it. saying those words would feel like betraying everyone else, yes, you're terrified of magic, but you don't want all of your friends to disappear! "friends".. you don't know if you actually would call them friends if those magicians weren't your only company in this world. you try to say that magic is not that bad, but something stops you. you try to say those words, but you realize that you can't because that would be a lie. you have thought many, MANY times that everything would be so much better if magic didn't exist. it's not only because of overblots and other terrible things, it's also because you wouldn't come to this world if it wasn't for magic. this is why you still can't go back home.

♡ you still can't find the courage to say that you think rollo is right, so you end up crying and you keep saying how scared you are and how tired you are. you blame yourself for crying in front of him, because you don't want to make him worry about you, but also, finally letting your feelings out like this feels nice. you needed to cry, you needed to admit that you find this whole situation terrifying and that you want all of this to end. you don't notice rollo looking confused for a second, it's almost like he's not sure what he's supposed to do, but when you look up at him, he's already holding you in his arms. and you realize that you needed someone to hug you like this for a long time.

♡ when rollo tells you about his plan, at first you think that it's a bit too much. you agree that this world would be much better without magic, but taking their powers like this.. you ask rollo if they're really gonna be okay after that, especially the fae students. rollo simply says that you're too kind for villains like them and that you don't have to care about them this much, they don't deserve your sympathy. after everything you've done for them, they are the ones who should feel sorry and beg you to spare them. you still don't want to hurt them too badly, but also.. maybe you and rollo really should teach them a lesson. it's fine, they are gonna be fine, you're doing this to save them, it's not your revenge or anything like that.. at least that's what you want to think and rollo assures you that you two really are going to save them and that your intentions are pure. it feels weird to hear just how much rollo wants to change this world and that you two are the only ones who can truly understand each other even though he's still a magic user himself and you are a magicless human. him meeting a human, who hates magic as much as he does and you meeting a magic user, who is willing to make this scary and cruel world a better place for you.. haha, you two are basically soulmates.