#actually at this point i could even imagine doing all 9 routes oops

[jinkoh]

help 🫣

[starglow-xx]

(About the brother!atsushi) aRE YOU READING MY MIND MISS?! Because that has been on my mind for MONTHS. TYSM For writing it was amazing!! If you don't mind, may I request (if requests are open) atsushi, still an older brother, but with a sister that's 10-13 yrs old? It's totally fine if you don't wanna do it. Keep up the good stories, ily mwuah!

*sobs* you’re so kind thank youu 🤧🤧

i wrote this a bit differently i hope that’s okay anon! at first i planned for this to be mainly abt atsushi and the reader, but i decided to add in relationship hcs with the agency bc i ran out of ideas

if you guys liked this don’t worry! im planning a special part two for this one so be the look out for it hehe

atsushi with a tween! sister

ft. the armed detective agency

like in my baby sister hcs, you’re still the most important thing to him period

the two of you got picked up by dazai and kunikida when he was 18 (obviously) and when you were 12

for a 12 year old, you were a bit small bc of malnourishment (which makes atsushi feel so bad) so both dazai and kunikida thought you were a bit younger than you actually were

they assumed you were about 9-10ish

you and atsushi both share a favorite food !! chazuke :)

so when kunikida treated the two of you, he made sure you got more bowls bc like i mentioned above, he feels really bad that you were malnourished and under weight

(don’t bring this up but kunikida felt bad too hehe)

when dazai went with your brother to the warehouse, you were with kunikida

imagine the surprise of the other ada members when kunikida came in with a little girl dressed in rags that popped out from behind him

kenji was the one who vocalized his thoughts 

“kunikida-san you have a daughter?! wow! i didn’t know that! :D”

when you found out your brother was a tiger, you were a bit concerned but you were actually kind of excited

you were even more excited when you found out the two of you were going to be taken in by the agency

anything was better than the stupid orphanage

and besides!

you got a tiger for an older brother and a bunch of other super powered agents to take care of you! who could want anything else?

at your age, you’re very impressionable and can be influenced easily so atsushi makes sure to teach you more in depth of good morals and the importance of kindness

his heart swells with pride and relief when he catches you being kind to others

pride bc he’s proud that even after all the two of you have gone through, you still ended up being a good kid and having a bright view of the world

and relief bc he hasn’t failed as a big brother

pfftt like he could ever fail

but please, from time to time reassure him that he’s perfect and the only big brother that you’d ever want bc he rlly needs that kind of validation

with his salary and savings, he tries to buy nice things for you

what a sweetheart 🥺

he saw you eyeing that one dress at a store window? fast forward abt a week and half and it’s inside a pretty gift bag for you

you wanted to try that dessert from the nice bakery? that’s dessert after dinner at one point

but other than buying you things, he sets money aside for you

like all the time

(y/n), here have this, you might need it”

“but nii-san you just gave me—”

“take it”

#1 spoiler

also your #1 confidant and source of physical affection

you tell him anything and everything (except crushies and those kinds of things)

atsushi loves it when you talk abt your day and he can see the big smile on your face and the sparkle in your eyes

it gives him the strength to keep going 😖😖

the two of you aren’t as touch starved as you’d probably think, but that’s only bc the two of you had each other

in your opinion, no one can match the hugs of your big brother

and it got even better bc YAYY he has tiger arms now ٩(◕‿◕)۶

if you ask, he’d carry you around too hehe

you also get nightmares quite often so he’ll always be there ready to calm you down, talk if you need to, and rock you back to sleep

god i love him 🤧🤧

atsushi will do everything in his power to protect you and make sure you get to grow up happy, supported, and loved

port mafia attack? oop he’s already taking you to the nearest escape route

someone is starting to harass you? they just got suckered punched into the next week

you want to go out to have some fun? he’ll go ask the president for a day off

you’re not feeling well? he’ll take another day off and take care of you

whatever you want to do, he’ll do it with you! (as long as it’s within reason)

will always be your #1 supporter! and he’s the president of your fan club hehe

he loves you so so much and will do anything for you; your life and happiness will always be more important to him

you are his reason to keep going

agency head canons !!

atsushi is your big brother, but kunikida is most definitely some sort of father figure

everyone can see it

except kunikida of course

kunikida scolds you lightly if he thinks your manners need work or if you make a mess in the agency

you listen to him of course and in turn as some sort of a reward, he’ll give you pieces of stationary

he always gives you the nice, good quality kind and you’re over the moon

atsushi adores it when you come running to him showing your new notebook or fountain pen and blabbering what you’re going to do with it

sometimes it isn’t even as a reward for being a good child; he’ll just give it to you and he’ll say smth like “i noticed you’ve used up your last notebook quite quickly, so here’s another one” or “did you run out of ink? here have this then”

he usually has a soft spot for children in general, but he most definitely has a soft spot (or a thousand) for you

yosano is kind of like a motherly figure to you

she gives you the guidance a mother should and goes on shopping trips with you!

atsushi always gets dragged along by you, but he thinks it’s worth it seeing you look so happy

yosano being a doctor also tries to teach the things you should know, or things that would be helpful to you

she’ll teach you the basics of cooking, sewing, how to treat a cold/fever, etc

also gives you excellent advice 1000% of the time

“remember (y/n)-chan if someone hurts you come tell me and then i’ll chop them into—”

“yOSANO-SENSEI DONT TELL HER THAT—”

fukuzawa is like a father to most in the agency but you see him more as a grandfather figure

bi weekly tea and gossip sessions hehe

along with cat talk!

most of the time though, it’s just you talking and him listening to you, but the two of you enjoy it nonetheless

“and then kunikida-san ended up crashing into a pole and dazai-san started to laugh at him and i did too because it was really funny but we ended up getting scolded—”

“hmm i see...”

he’ll let you stay in his office as he fills out paperwork; you’re usually doodling or drawing in your notebooks

sometimes he’ll meditate and you’ll join him, but 4/7 times you’d fall asleep

you always wake up with a blanket over you

dazai is like a cool but a highly concerning and kind of high maintenance uncle

frequently takes you out with him when he ditches work

walks in the park, eating at uzumaki so he has the excuse of treating you so he doesn’t have to pay his tab avoiding kunikida and sometimes chuuya and akutagawa, all that fun stuff

also tries to not talk abt suicide in front of you especially if it’s just the two of you alone

he knows that you mean the world to his pupil and that said pupil would probably hate him for putting suicide inside your brain

he teaches you random but useful things like how to pick a lock, how to steal kunikida’s notebook if you’re looking for some information, how to sweet talk your way out of things, etc.

is also the one to tell you that if you ever get a significant other to introduce them to the agency first

he always wants all of your gossip; some of them work pretty well for blackmail

“dazai-san! dazai-san! did you know that kunikida-san lost his glasses and he was looking for them for nearly an hour when he was just holding them the entire time??”

“woah really (y/n)-chan?! hey hey can you say it again into this recording device so kunikida-kun would believe me when i tell him—”

always ends up giving kunikida a heart attack when he says that you’ve been with him all day

ranpo is also like a cool but a highly concerning and kind of high maintenance uncle

will share some of his snacks, but don’t push it or you might not get anything at all

loves it when you compliment him

if you tagged along with him and your brother on a case, he will show off to impress you

“...and that’s how the crime happened”

“UWAHH RANPO-SAN YOU’RE SO COOL”

atsushi is lowkey and kunikida is highkey stressed that ranpo’s eating habits will rub off on you

“ne (y/n)-chan do you wanna try this highly caffeinated drink and this concerning amount of sugar filled snack?”

“can i really?!”

“rANPO-SAN NO—”

ranpo definitely does stuff like that on purpose 

the tanizakis are like siblings to you!

a weird set of siblings but siblings nonetheless

the two of them adore you and think you’re precious

atsushi definitely knows how to do your hair whether it’s long or short but he got even better at it when he asked the two

hehe braid trains are definitely a thing + kyouka and kenji (and maybe even dazai)

sometimes you have sibling swap days

you’re with junichiro for most of the day and atsushi is with naomi

strange i know

each of the tanizaki siblings try to make it fun bc they know that the two of you did not at all have a happy upbringing

junichiro likes spending time with you by taking you out to different places that naomi likes to frequent

like the mall, different stores and restaurants, the park, places like those

naomi does the same thing with atsushi so if you ever bump into them, you go out and eat together :)

besides atsushi, the next one in line who spoils you the most would be junichiro (and yosano & kunikida both coming in at a close third)

he honestly can’t help it; you remind him of how naomi was when she was younger

and besides

he’s always been a sucker when it came to the happiness of a little sister

“would you really buy this for me junichiro-san?!”

“of course! don’t worry about it” :)

wanna talk abt boys/girls/celebrity crushes things like that? naomi is your girl

you feel a bit embarrassed to go talking to yosano or your brother abt that and kyouka does not know a thing abt them either

“uwahh naomi-san look at all these people in this magazine! they look so good!”

“right?! but of course onii-sama is still the best—”

you get along with kenji and kyouka quite nicely being roughly the same age as them; they’re also like siblings!

just pure, wholesome vibes from the three of you

you’re over the moon when she finds out that kyouka is staying with you and your brother

atsushi is twice as happy seeing you talk your mouth off and finally having a girl around your age to talk to

“do you think demon snow can change how she looks?”

“hmm... im not sure...”

you and kenji talk abt anything and everything

he even teaches you how to take care of plants!

sometimes the two of you are kind of in the same boat bc you don’t know much abt yokohoma being stuck in the orphanage and kenji doesn’t know much abt cities in general

“wait where are we again kenji-san?”

“ah we’re close to the ports! but im not really sure how close because i don’t know what the symbols on this sign mean”

“don’t worry! neither do i!”

bonus things!

yosano was kind of too late teaching you abt you know what

“NII-SAN IM BLEEDING IN BETWEEN MY LEGS”

you’re sobbing in the agency’s bathroom and atsushi is panicking trying to get you to open the door

“Y/N?! H-HOLD ON LET ME GET YOSANO SENSEI”

ranpo overhears and cackles making everyone around him confused

suddenly atsushi bursts in the agency basically on the verge of tears rambling incoherent sentences abt the bathroom, you, and blood

it just clicked for everybody in the room

(im going to pretend that kenji has sisters back home so that atsushi is the only one who remain oblivious here hehe)

atsushi is genuinely confused and sort of concerned that no one is freaking out with him

yosano waves her hand saying smth like that she’d take care of it and junichiro pulls atsushi to the side to talk to him

fast forward like half and hour and dazai and ranpo are cackling on the looks of both of your faces

honestly not sure who’s more traumatized, you or your brother

“why does this have to happen” :(

“ne ne (y/n)-chan!~ you’re too young but at some point you’re not going to have it!”

“uwahh really dazai-san?” :D

“yeah! but first you have to have ANFK—”

next thing you know your ears are being covered by your brother and dazai is thrown across the room by kunikida

you know

the normal

you’re twelve and have never gone to school, but the agency takes care of that

it’s too dangerous to go to school so they teach you what’s necessary and whatever else they can

kunikida takes care of math (obviously)

yosano takes care of science/biology/anatomy/health (whatever you wanna call it)

ranpo even dragged poe to help you with english

atsushi even got lucy to help you out with english too!

as tanizaki and naomi used to be students, they give you their old work books and they try to teach you all the other subjects

sometimes kyouka and kenji are there learing with you too!

sorry if there’s some errors! i’ll read through it again later :)

and as always, reblogs and shares are appreciated! i hope you all stay safe! and just in case nobody told you they loved you today, i love you! you are enough! <3

writing belongs to me! please do not plagiarize! the reblog button is there for a reason

[snowdice]

Road Trips and Missing Persons (Part 13)

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Patton & Virgil, Virgil & Deceit, Logan & Patton, Emile & Remy, Roman & Remus & Janus

Characters: Patton, Virgil, Deceit, Remus, Roman, Logan, Emile, Remy

Summary: Patton was just getting groceries. The next thing he knew, there was a knife at his throat and he was an unwilling uber driver. Virgil’s on the run after the murder of his dad, and it’s not just his paranoia that’s telling him he’s being chased down. He has to get somewhere safe, somewhere he can trust, and all he has is a couple of stories from his dad and a name: “Green Bellow Foods and Dispensary.”

Notes: Secret Agents AU, knives, carjacking, kidnapping, murder mentioned, guns mentioned, pepper spray, blood mentioned, drugs mentioned, explosions (more to be added)

This is a fic I’ve been writing on study breaks that you have probably all already seen at this point. I’ve affectionately named it the Goblin Brain Fic because it’s helping my brain actually get motivated for studying. I’ve slightly edited it for wording and grammar, but not for content from my previous posts. Feel free to send in asks to direct it because I’m not 100% sure where this is going and you can help decide if you feel so inclined! You can see the process I went through to build this at this link.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 My Master Post

Remy was slumped down in his seat as Emile continued to lecture him on all the possible consequences of his actions over the past 24 hours. Jeezy creezy was Emile miffed about all of that. Remy had been trying to blow it off, but Emile was fully, painfully aware that he’d almost had lost his brother today and Remy was going to hear about it until Emile’s lungs aches.

“And another thing…” he said.

“Wait,” Remy said, and Emile did because there was a lace of panic to his tone.

“What?” Emile asked.

“The tracker stopped working,” Remy answered pushing buttons a little bit desperately on his device.

“It went completely offline somehow,” Remy said.

“Did it get turned off?” Emile asked. “Or run out of batteries?”

“It doesn’t turn off and the batteries are designed to last for years,” Remy said. “It can even track through 20 feet of water. The only way it could stop sending a signal this abruptly is if the thing was destroyed.”

Emile paused. “You said Virgil knows what the blinking light means.”

“Yes.”

“Is it possible that he knows, or well, ‘knows,’ you’re dead? Barbara did send a man after him, he could have mentioned it.”

Remy stared down at the device in his hands.

He pressed a couple of buttons and studied the screen for a moment. “You little shit,” he groaned. “You threw it out the fucking car window, didn’t you?”

“How do you know?” Emile asked.

“Because if I look at the history, it was going at 65 miles per hour down the interstate, suddenly stopped cold, and then went offline probably when another car inevitably crushed it.”

“Ah.”

“Well, at least the fucker’s probably okay. Dammit Virgil! Where are you going?” Remy pushed a few more buttons almost idly as he thought. “Let me get into Virgil’s head for a minute: emo music, dark clothes, would rather have his toenails ripped out than go to parties, makes split second decisions based on little info. Yep! Got him.”

Emile rolled his eyes, but Remy wouldn’t have noticed as he had his own eyes closed. “Hmm. So, I’m Virgil. My bitch mom killed my dad and sent someone after me. I have no idea what’s going on, but I bolt out of there because fuck mom. I want to get the hell out of dodge so I convince someone to drive me somehow, I guess, but where would I want to go? Someplace safe. Where’s safe? Maybe Emile, but obviously that’s not where he went. Or Janus, but he’s too connected to mom. I don’t really know anyone else, especially not someone who could help with this sort of stuff.”

Remy thought for another long moment. “Oops.”

“Oops?” Emile asked. “What oops?”

He could tell by the expression on Remy’s face that he was not going to like the answer. “I may have let something… slip.”

“What do you mean, Remington?”

“Um, well you see,” Remy said. “A couple of months ago Virgil was being, you know, himself: a little shit. He may have, possibly, found some papers.”

“What kind of papers?” Emile asked.

“They were nothing important!” Remy assured. “There wasn’t any dangerous info in them or anything, but…”

“But?”

“It is somewhat possible that they had the name on them.”

“How possible?” Emile asked, eyes narrowed on him.

“He asked what Green Bellow Foods was and why they needed 50 top-of-the line computers outfitted at an old factory.”

“And what did you tell him?!”

“Nothing!”

Emile glared at him.

“Okay, well I had to tell him something,” Remy mumbled. “I just kind of said that I knew the owner well and was working with him on some stuff. Then I told him not to worry about it, which was probably a mistake, because he’s Virgil. So, then I found him snooping in my car. At that point I had to sit him down and talk to him. So, I told him a bit about Logan.”

“Remy that’s not nothing!”

“I didn’t use his name or anything. I just told him a couple of really, extremely, tremendously, vague stories, so he didn’t think I owed money to the mafia. Which, yes, he did suggest.”

“That’s worse!”

“What do you want from me Emile?!”

“Some common sense!” Emile answered. “I’ve been comparing you to the rat in Ratatouille for years, but I’m starting to think you’re more of a Pinky from Pinky and the Brain.”

“Hey, ouch,” Remy replied. “Also, I personally subscribe to the theory that Pinky is actually the intelligent one who is foiling Brain’s evil plots from the inside. So, there.”

“Now is not the time,” Emile said.

“Oh, it’s not the time to discuss cartoon theories?” Remy mumbled into his lap. “Must be serious.”

“It is serious! Virgil is missing!”

“Don’t you think I know that?!” Remy snapped. “I know, Emile.”

There was quiet. Emile took a breath. “Okay,” he said, calmer. “Do you really think he’s going to Logan?”

“He’s headed somewhere,” Remy answered, “and wherever that somewhere is, it’s inexplicably down the most direct route towards base.”

“Well, Virgil is smart. I don’t think he’d just keep going so quickly without a destination in mind. We should call Logan.”

“Do you honestly believe Barbara doesn’t have your phone tapped when Virgil is missing? If you had one of Logan’s phones, I might agree with you, but as it is, we’d be giving away our position, and possibly clueing her into Virgil’s plan. If he shows up at base, Logan will take him in no question. It’s less dangerous for everyone this way.”

“Fine,” Emile said. “We’ll just keep driving towards Logan and hope you’re right about where he’s going.”

“Of course, I’m right,” Remy said lightly. “I’ve got the paternal instincts going on. Course, they didn’t stop the knife throwing incident of ’09. I blame Janus for that, though.”

Emile shook his head at him.

“It is good for when he tries to steal sweets, or that one time he brought home a baby piglet and tried to hide it from me in his bedroom. Or when he’s feeling anxious about something but won’t tell me because he thinks it’s silly.” Remy’s own fingers tapped out an anxious pattern against his knee. “It also worked with the golf cart incident, but it was too late. Again, I blame Janus. He messes with the paternal instinct meter. He’s far too unpredictable and I make the mistake of thinking he’s responsible, which he is half the time, but the other half of the time I remember that he’s still mostly a kid and one that grew up in an unstable environment. Did I tell you that last month they went and won a bunch of tickets at the arcade and used them to get those 5 ticket rubber ducks and just unloaded them all over my room? Honestly, you’d think a 21-year-old would have a better use for his money or at least have the brains to go buy them at a store. He could have gotten like 500 more ducks for the same amount of money. Of course, it was his mom’s money, so I guess I can get behind wasting it on arcade games and rubber ducks. The prank was apparently based on some comedy sketch Virgil found online.”

“You’re doing the thing again,” Emile pointed out calmly.

“Stop psych evaluating me,” he shot back.

“Fine, fine,” Emile said. “Keep distracting yourself from your emotional responses with silly stories. See if I care.”

“Thank you,” Remy replied. “I will.”

Emile sighed as he started back up again mumbling something about having taken away Virgil’s Gameboy after catching him playing it at 3 o’clock in the morning. He claimed this wasn’t because the boy hadn’t gotten any sleep on a school night, but because he’d insulted Donkey Kong to Remy’s face. After that story had run its course, Remy continued to babble at an increasingly fast pace about all sorts of things. Emile imagined most of the stories he sprouted off were quite embellished.

Emile had tried to turn on the radio once, but Remy had slapped his hand away saying, “The next one’s a really good one.” So, he had resigned himself to his fate of tuning out Remy’s coping mechanism to the best of his abilities and just focusing on driving for the next 45 minutes. Which is probably why he noticed that traffic had strangely decreased. He didn’t really pay the fact that much mind until the traffic suddenly increased… in the form of a wall of stopped cars.

“Jenkies, what’s going on?” he asked, as he came to a stop at the end of the line of cars.

“Um…” Remy said looking out of his car window. There, staring into their car with beady black eyes was a cow. As Emile watched, said cow leaned forward to drag its tongue across the passenger side window. “Shit.”

Want to read more? Click below!

Part 14

[dracothedeatheatingcupcake-ao3]

TPWP Chapter 19 Spoilers!!!

Hi guys! 

So, in chapter 19 of TPWP, I chose to go a more explicit route than it had been going previously. I decided to write about why I did that, as well as go over Mondo’s mentality during it all, since I don’t have his perspective written yet, oops.

It prolly will be best to not read this until after reading the chapter, though, or else this won’t make any sense, ha. 

You can find the explanation under the read more. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Okay. So, when I was originally thinking about this story, I didn’t have much idea of where I wanted to go. Right? I was just like “I have the desire to write, so I’m gonna write.” No plans for where the story would go, no real end game in mind. Just… I wanna write, so I’m gonna write. Everything else will come with time. 

 It wasn’t until around chapter… 13, 14? that I started to have a strong idea for where I wanted this story to go. I’d had small ideas before, like in chapter 12 I knew I wanted to add a Halloween festival (which originally was going to be a dance before I remembered Japan does festivals, not dances), and I knew I wanted to have the sauna scene somewhere. Also, in chapter 9 I knew I wanted to have Chihiro befriend Mondo and have them tell Mondo their secret (which, by the by, was originally going to occur back in chapter 9 instead of in chapter 17. Rather than have Taka get all passionate and demanding, Taka and Mondo were going to overhear some dude harassing Chi in the library, they were going to follow the voice, and Mondo was going to be all “oh dude you’re gonna regret that,” ha. That was gonna have Taka be all “oh dude, he’s not all bad, is he?? Huh…” and Chi would be like “woah he’s a nice guy. Maybe I can tell him my secret???” But then I got sidetracked with the passion and couldn’t fit that in, but knew I wanted it somewhere. But I’m very much digressing, ha).

 Anyway! While I had individual plot points figured out, I didn’t have anything major. Nothing concrete, just a bunch of mostly unrelated ideas. 

 But then. Then, in chapter 13, I wrote the, uh… “nocturnal emission” scene. I did that mostly because I was growing tired of the slow burn and wanted some relief of having them kiss and confess, without it ruining my plan. But when I was writing and editing it, I kept thinking “man, wouldn’t it be cool if they did something like this? If they were all “dude you’re so awesome and I’m so attracted to you and I really wanna do ~~~sexual stuff~~~ with you, hahaha. Platonically, of course!!! Ahahaha!!!!”

 I didn’t think it would work at first. I knew I wanted this to be a slow burn and I knew I wanted to end this story right before winter break, so I couldn’t have them get together until this story ended. I was afraid that having them ~~do things~~ together would have them go too fast and would make things complicated. 

 But I was really starting to like the idea. I began seeing ways I could play with the idea without it being inherently romantic, with having them still deny their feelings. I didn’t know if it would work, but I decided to lay down the groundwork anyway. I wrote chapter 18, figuring it would be funny and make both boys painfully aware that they ~~~like~~~ the other (even if Mondo denies it), if nothing else. And then I figured, well. Why not write chapter 19? Worst case scenario, I don’t use it and write something else. And I usually hate doing things like that. Once something is written, that becomes my canon, usually, and it’s hard for me to do anything different. But I can do it, so I figured it was worth the risk. 

 I was very iffy with the chapter at first. The first part of the chapter was hard to write and was initially… not good. Very clunky and awkwardly worded and I didn’t like it. But I kept going because… whatever. I had the idea of making Taka aware of Mondo’s decidedly not platonic interactions with him, since I figured that even Taka would begin to see the truth when all the evidence points in that direction. Plus, I figured it would be good set up for what I wanted to have happen. Taka does not strike me as the kind of person who would do anything sexual unless he really liked and trusted the person he was with. I kind of head canon Taka as being somewhere on the ace spectrum, ha. Projection, I know. Maybe graysexual, with Mondo as a kind of exception, or demisexual, feeling attracted to Mondo now that he was romantically interested in him. But because of that, I didn’t think he’d just be willing to jump into Mondo’s bed, so to speak, if he didn’t have some inkling that maybe his feelings were reciprocated. 

 And as for the actual sexual encounter… that had come to me back in chapter 14, when Mondo and Taka were discussing all of that. The way I saw it, the idea kind of… stuck around in Mondo’s head. Now, I’m ace. Right? I don’t really understand sexual attraction. And while I do feel desire and all that, I definitely understand people who don’t feel anything sexual at all. But I imagine that allo (people who feel sexual attraction in general) people with no concept of what asexuality is wouldn’t understand something like that. They wouldn’t understand not feeling desire. And so, it concerns Mondo, who uses that sort of thing to destress and forget his troubles for a little while. 

 Upon hearing that Taka doesn’t, and knowing how tense Taka always is, it niggles at Mondo and makes him worry for Taka. Now, there is absolutely nothing wrong with not feeling sexual desire and not wanting to pleasure yourself. I imagine that Mondo could even understand if Taka didn’t feel desire at all, and if he didn’t want to do things like that in general. But what concerns Mondo is that he KNOWS Taka feels sexual desire. I’ve not yet discussed this in the chapters yet, but, uh… ya know Taka’s “nocturnal emissions?” Well… let’s just say that he is very vocal during them. And he has been known to let slip a certain name. The owner of said name definitely hearing Taka and knowing exactly what that means, even if it kind of shorts his brain out to think it, ha. 

 Anyway. This has been rattling around in Mondo’s head for weeks by this point. If my timeline was how I originally had it, it would be longer, but since I had to condense everything, it’s been like… 2 weeks since Halloween? And Mondo has been thinking about it constantly despite himself. Even more so after the bath. He knows Taka is tense, knows that jerking off helps relieve tension, and he knows that Taka is attracted to him in some regard, even if Taka thinks it’s wrong. 

 And I would like to state for the record that Mondo ABSOLUTELY meant the offer innocently when he first brought it up. He just wanted to be all “hey bro. So, I know you don’t do this since you find it morally wrong, but it’s not, and it would be cool if you tried it. No one would blame you. And if you wanted to think of /me/ while doing it, well that would be cool too, HAHAHAHAHAHA-”

 But when Taka started getting all upset, Mondo started getting upset. He really cares about Taka, and he hates seeing him cry and be unhappy. And when Taka mentioned feeling broken and wrong, Mondo /hated/ that. He doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with Taka at all. Even if Taka didn’t feel any arousal, he wouldn’t think there was anything wrong with Taka and would be 100% supportive. 

 But the thing is, he /does/ know that Taka feels arousal. He does know that Taka feels these things and is perfectly able to do it all, given his dreams. And so, he /knows/ that Taka’s problem is a mental one. And he thinks that maybe if Taka just… forces through the problem, like Mondo often will, well… maybe that would help. And Taka would feel better about himself. And he’d be able to have a way to relieve tension. 

 (And, of course, Mondo would be able to see the guy he’s unwittingly crushing hard on jerk himself off, but that’s completely beside the point, right???? Mondo’s just a really good bro and wants to help his bro in any way he can. Bro.) 

 He didn’t quite realize how much he’d enjoy the whole proceedings, though. And oh, did he enjoy it. Watching Taka touch himself. Watching Taka watch /him/ as he touched himself, his eyes full of desire and heat, clearly desiring Mondo deeply. It was the first time he realized that maybe… just /maybe/ there is something more to what he’s feeling. More than the familial love he’s been telling himself he feels. And it’s not like he’s never felt attracted to Taka, or like he’s never wanted him, right? He has. Many times. But those times he’d make excuses. Tell himself he was just horny in general and that it had nothing to do with Taka personally. That he didn’t actually want Taka but just wanted /someone/. But this… this is the first time he can’t really excuse it away, not with how much desire he currently is feeling. He does his best not to think about it, just keeps going, wanting to help Taka, but… it’s now there in the back of his mind. A tiny little seed of doubt and desire. 

 And when Taka pulls away, tears in his eyes, saying that there’s something wrong with him, that he’s broken, well… Mondo is so far gone by this point, ridiculously turned on, and he’s drowning in his concern. He hates seeing Taka so unhappy with himself, and he wants to prove to Taka that there’s nothing wrong with him. And with how far gone he is, he doesn’t think about how bad an idea this whole thing is. He doesn’t think about how supposedly straight guys shouldn’t do things like this. He doesn’t think about how he shouldn’t even be thinking about things like this at all, not if he were truly as straight as he tries to pretend that he is. All he knows is that Taka is distressed and unhappy. And that he’d do absolutely anything to make him happy again. 

 He didn’t expect to enjoy it as much as he does. Even with the niggling thought in the back of his head that he’d been enjoying the previous encounter a bit too much, he didn’t think he’d be so turned on by touching Taka. He thought he’d do it kind of militantly, a task he had to do, something that was kind of meaningless but important, nonetheless. 

 But that’s not how it felt. And Mondo was so far gone that he couldn’t begin to chastise himself for feeling how he was feeling. It was like a religious experience for Mondo, honestly. An epiphany. A moment of “oh. So that’s what I’ve been feeling.” He has no idea what it means, or why he feels like this, but he… he /likes it/. Likes touching Taka, likes making Taka feel good. He likes kissing Taka, too, and in that moment… he wants nothing more than to have Taka. All of Taka. He is so far gone that he can’t close the floodgates, can’t stop the desire he’s feeling. He loves Taka, he already knew that. But for the first time… for the first time, he realizes that he is /attracted/ to Taka, too. And it’s not as terrifying as he would have thought. 

 Of course… this all changes once they’re done, and the desire has faded. Now… getting a bit meta here. But like I said in the end notes, I initially had considered making Mondo completely fine with everything that happened. He was going to be like “well, guess we shouldn’t call each other kyoudai anymore, heh…” and it would be awkward, but ultimately, they’d realize they had sexual feelings for each other. 

 But! If you recall what I said earlier, I wanted this to be a slow burn. A VERY slow burn. Having them get together this early wouldn’t make sense in that regard. And honestly… it wouldn’t make sense for Mondo’s character, either. Not how I’ve been writing him. So, I made a decision. Rather than be okay with it… I’d make him deny and repress himself again. I came up with a reason for him to be so repressed and scared of his feelings later on, which if you’ve read the TPWM companion chapter for chapter 6 of TPWP, you have some idea of what his problem is. 

 Anyway. Ultimately, my decision to do this was less “hehe hot bois being lewd” or whatever, and was more “this could lead somewhere interesting and I’m intrigued to seeing how this will play out.” I started having an idea of where to go with this story and this plot line was very important to it, honestly. I usually hate smut that has no bearing on the plot at all, so I made this smut be purposeful and have meaning. It leads somewhere and has a purpose, I promise. 

 Also! Why I had Taka have, um… erectile disfunction issues. Mostly, I figured that he’d be the type of person to be super embarrassed by that sort of thing. And after spending at least eight years forcing himself to ignore and repress the fact that he’s gay, not to mention how upright and moral he forces himself to be, I imagine that pleasuring himself was low on his priorities. And there are people who get so very anxious at the thought of self-pleasuring, usually religious people, but I figured it would work with Taka too. Plus, it was the only way I could imagine nudging Mondo into doing such a thing. Mondo cares so much for Taka and seeing him struggling would make Mondo want to do literally anything for him. Including, uh… that, ha. And it allowed Taka to accept the help. So… yeah. I don’t know much about ED and wasn’t looking forward to researching it for this story, so I didn’t do much research and was like… it’s fine, ha. 

 Anyway, I hope that all made sense! And I hope my reasoning for it all is understandable. 

[jimmymcgools]

From ch 17, "Through his airplane window once, Albuquerque had looked like an afterthought, dwarfed by the sky." all the way to the absolutely perfect ending! (since I'm about to chonk on this chapter 🥰❤️)

♥️💙♥️💙 thank you so much! this one got long, wow 

fic commentary meme and my answers

i am WEAK for an indulgent callback and this ending is the most indulgent and callbacky thing i’ve ever done. i really hoped it would give the chapter a sense of closure and finality -- or at least that’s the excuse i gave myself to go absolutely ham. 

Through his airplane window once, Albuquerque had looked like an afterthought, dwarfed by the sky.

i didn’t do it deliberately at the time i wrote chapter one, but at some point i noticed that interesting quirk of jimmy’s very first observation of abq. it’s all sky and mountains and nothing of the actual city: “Albuquerque makes a disgustingly beautiful first impression: the sky as big and curved and blue as he’s always heard it can be, streaked with paintbrush clouds.” 

It had looked like something ready to be forgotten

another callback to chapter 1. “Here, the architecture feels almost temporary, as if it’s been carelessly dropped on some enormous play-mat and forgotten.” i always try to use jimmy’s observations of abq to reflect how he feels about himself at that point. 

along with the thought of the heavy suitcases that he’d watched slip and shift in the overhead lockers before takeoff

i don’t think it really stands out enough to be anything, but i was stuck for list items here and i ended up trying to fold in some of that slippin’ jimmy gaze. the idea that maybe he’s not only looking at people to read them / figure out how he could scam them, but looking for these liability insurance $$ payouts waiting to happen. 

... along with the thought of their drive out to O’Hare, Jimmy silent in the passenger seat of the rental car, the radio off and Chuck’s grip tight on the steering wheel. 

oops--just remembered jimmy says chuck’s waiting in a taxi! 

Jimmy had listened to the line ring for what felt like forever, each silver chime spinning a silver thread across the city, winding toward his mother’s living room. 

more damn callbacks! when he thinks about calling his mother in chapter 9: “He imagines a line emerging from the handset, a thin silvery thread spinning off from his room and his street and then out of Albuquerque, crossing over the Sandias and shooting northeastward, over rivers and fields and Dust Bowl states, until finally arriving in Cicero, in his mother’s living room.” 

It echoed through the handset like it was being piped back to him, like the prison phone was just a sick joke, a closed loop, locked inside

so much of acb is jimmy trying to break out of these closed loops 

In a bright and steady voice, or at least his brightest and steadiest, he had said, “Hey, Mom. Something’s happened.”

law offices of james m mcgill, how may i direct your call! 🙂

It seems unfamiliar at first, but then the city starts to take shape, and he thinks he can see the squat skyscrapers of downtown, the geometric cubes that rise from the flat land. 

i wanted this to be the end point of a series, where jimmy’s first impression is the beginning, and him arriving back from cicero is the middle, and now only here is he finally familiar with the city. the next few sentences are kind of a walk through acb -- "squat skyscrapers of downtown” is similar to how jimmy sees the city in chapter 7 when they go to the movies, then we get central avenue/route 66 “historic and neon-glowed”, and then finally the airport on the “desert shore” like in chapter 14. 

Might even see Chuck’s house, still lit by lantern light. 

ofc jimmy’s thinking of the luminarias but the dramatic irony here was too good to pass up 🔥🔥🔥

And in the west now, clouds. As the sun vanishes below the horizon, they become briefly clear, shadowed with lilac and orange, and Jimmy can see their shape by the light on them. 

you’re going to have to forgive me for how damn metaphorical this is gonna get, but thinking of metaphors is one of the big ways i spark ideas for description, and this ending is really just an enormous chunk of description, so 💀

these clouds. these damn clouds. ever since hamlin snr told jimmy to find a space in the world only he can can fit, jimmy’s thoughts have kept returning to that idea -- and his mother’s innocent words, too: “you were really in no shape”. so the idea that, if he can figure out what shape he is, he’ll know which space he can fit.

and throughout the fic when i was stuck on kim description i’d play with light, and the idea of kim being a source of light, like the sun. the fireworks sequence is a big example, where i wanted to make her as bright as the fireworks, or at the holiday party: “Beneath the hanging Christmas lights, she’s luminous.” 

so when i wrote “and Jimmy can see their shape by the light on them” i was thinking about him seeing the shape of himself and therefore his place in the world because of kim. 

... but the clouds only become briefly clear.

(it’s also a little bit of inspired/stolen phrasing from the end of no country for old men: “and i could see the horn from the light inside of it.”)

If he watched for long enough, he thinks that he could also see them moving slowly, driven by high winds.

oh did you think i was done talking about these clouds? ☁️☁️☁️

this from chapter 11: “A display entitled Surviving in a Moving Landscape shows how the dunes can shift almost forty feet a year in places, driven by high winds”

“surviving in a moving landscape” ♥️ i always thought that was a really nice way to look at the characters of bcs. they’re the animals in the dunes having to adapt to survive, but also the dunes themselves. moving slowly because of these intangible forces on them, adapting to the forces, but changing forever for it. 

The winds move through him, too, hollowing him out.

a future callback, i borrowed "hollowing him out” again for chapter 5 of safs, so keep an eye out 👁

In the darkness, the flat land below the Sandias seems to go on forever, black and flickering with dying embers: scorched earth. 

if i had seen this specific image of abq from the sandias before i wrote the chapter, the light on the clouds would’ve been the city lights of abq -- even BETTER than the sunset! look at it! LOOK!

He can even smell them on the wind: the woodsmoke scent of evening

jimmy thinks of night smelling like woodsmoke on their drive along route 66, and then again on the forecourt of clines corners. bringing that back here with the idea that it’s coming from those imaginary fires of the city lights. 

And he thinks that his whole life since arriving in Albuquerque has been like a controlled burn: searing away the silk shirts and the fake Rolexes and the ice of Michigan Avenue until nothing remains—breath on a cold mirror vanishing—a blank slate. 

(peter griffin voice 👉AHH, AHH, 👉THERE IT IS)

the end here is inspired by this from “how to embrace a swamp creature” by tmg:

Alone with your bathroom mirror Try to get my head straight Breathe on the glass and wait for it to clear Clean slate

Burned back and clean. So he thinks about what he could build. 

jimmy thinking very much like kim here, and especially what she said in the last chapter about the desert being sterile. 

He thinks about his brother on a park bench, surrounded by luminarias. He thinks about a paper-wrapped book with fourteen words inside it.

i really wanted there to be some of chuck in this moment, even though i’ve ended up in such a shippery/kim place. 

He thinks of letting her move against him, move over him, move around him. Of letting her define the edges of him.

the same idea as the light on the clouds, but hopefully a little more apparent! 😂and more returning images, and the seed planted by kim in the white sands motel. 

there’s something so fragile about jimmy’s realisation here, i hope. he really is still doing so much of this for other people. it’s hard -- there’s something about slippin’ jimmy coming to abq and deciding to *dedicate years and years of his life to becoming a lawyer* that’s just... incredible. i tried to get to a place by the end of this fic where it made sense, and of course we all know he ends up doing it, but -- i always wanted there to be this inspiration from within himself to do it, too, outside of him just doing it to follow kim or to make chuck proud. 

but i don’t think he’s found it here, as much as the shape of himself is briefly visible atop the sandia peak. 

Jimmy wonders if he’s allowed to stay here all night, up on the Sandias. Up on this one high place.

oh jimmy if only you could stay up there forever. hamlin snr voice: perspective!!

He imagines waiting exactly here until the sun returns, until it rises behind him and breaks over the mountains. Like sitting beside Kim on the trunk of her car, their legs pressed together beneath the blanket.

this specific idea of holding off on seeing 🌄morning over the sandias 🌄at the end of chapter 16 came as i was planning that chapter. i was worried that ending with a sunrise would seem too final, seem too much like the ending of the whole story, and that chapter 17 would then end up feeling tacked on. 

Then, the dawn had seemed to reach out close enough to touch them, huge and breathless, warm fingers on his skin.

three rapid fire callbacks in these next sentences. first an inverse of this from chapter 6, when kim takes a cup of coffee from him: “He can feel the ghost of her fingers like sunlight on his skin.” 

And Jimmy had inhaled the colors of it: blue and gold and orange, streaks of brightness across the enormous sky.

then white sands: “as Jimmy inhales the air and the colors he thinks that there could be nothing more opposite of a Cook County jail cell than this exact spot in the middle of the White Sands National Monument.”

Morning sliding over the land. 

and this is so niche and impossible, but it’s “I watch the sun rise over this wall / I watch it break and slide” from “graffiti” by throwing muses, which is on the road trip playlist and shows up in chapter 10 with: “A smile crests Kim’s face like the sun over a wall.” but, you know. callback?

And now he stands on the edge of the viewing platform and he looks out into the darkness of the city. And he imagines it all bathed in light.

i said that i decided to shift the idea of the sunrise here because it felt too much like an ending -- and man, the noise i made when i realised that jimmy imagining the sun rising behind him was jimmy imagining the world before him finally illuminated. 

i also loved the idea of the weird clash of him standing there at sunset, at night, and imagining dawn. 

🌄🌄🌄☁️☁️☁️ thank you so much for asking!! 💙

[seagreen-meets-grey]

When Lightning Strikes Ch. 12

When your life is nothing but a cloudless sky, lightning can come and strike you so unexpectedly, you won’t even know what hit you.

Or: When Hiccup and Astrid meet, it is as if lightning strikes.

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5] [Chapter 6] [Chapter 7] [Chapter 8] [Chapter 9] [Chapter 10] [Chapter 11] [Chapter 13] [Chapter 14] [Chapter 15] [Chapter 16] [Chapter 17] [Chapter 18] [Chapter 19] [Chapter 20]

Crossposted on ao3 and ff.net

_______________

“Okay girls, chop chop, the shower awaits! You were in good form today, let’s keep that up until tomorrow!”

Seven girls from ages eight to eleven rushed past her, giggling and jumping around each other after a successful training session. With a sigh, Astrid watched them disappear behind the door to the showers, glad that none of them slipped on the wet floor. The last thing she needed was half of her team losing their teeth or breaking their bones before the competition tomorrow.

She watched the water for a few minutes, small waves still rippling through the pool from the recent activity. As always, it was entrancing, hearing the soft gurgling call out to her, inviting her in for a swim. Briefly considering giving in, Astrid shook her head and walked towards the shower to check on the girls. She had to make sure they didn’t dawdle too long because their parents were picking them up soon. Besides, she had plans herself.

The big clock on the wall told her she still had time; if it weren’t for the children she had to urge to leave the warm shower and quit fooling around (like they always did, because even if they couldn’t swim in the water, they found other ways to play with it), she’d technically have time to swim a few laps on her own. All she had to do was lose the shorts, flip-flops and t-shirt she wore over her swimsuit, and dive in.

But she didn’t give herself the option, walking through the door to the showers instead. Excited squeals and giggles mixed with the sound of splashing water greeted her. And when she turned the corner, situating herself in the doorway with a stern face and her hands on her hips, she didn’t have to wait five seconds before the girls had spotted her and hurriedly went back to dumping shampoo on their hair.

“I want to see all of you dressed and ready by the hairdryers in ten minutes! If I catch one of you still in here by then, I’ll have all of you do twenty extra laps next week!”

Aware that she was one to follow through with her threats, the girls sped up their showering routines, their chatter dying down to the occasional urge for the particularly slow-paced teammate to hurry up.

Astrid left the showers for the changing rooms, swapping her clothes for her jeans and t-shirt. By the time she was tying her shoes, the last of the kids had entered the room and started to dress themselves.

“Don’t dawdle too long, you parents are waiting,” she reminded them when she left the room. A few years back, when she’d first started this job, she’d always stayed behind until the last of the kids were done. But she’d soon found that it was far more effective to get them to hurry if she already left the room, letting them know she was waiting for them.

And lo and behold, no more than five minutes later, all seven girls were fully dressed and fighting over the best hairdryers. The first parents were waiting behind the turnstiles, but Astrid took the time to huddle up her girls for a last team assembly.

“Remember, go to sleep early tonight, and don’t eat an entire chocolate cake before bed. Believe me, I’ve been there, you’ll just regret it in the morning.” That earned her a few giggles. “And don’t stress yourselves out too much, you got this! We trained hard and we’re in top form. And even if we don’t come first tomorrow, I know you’re going to do your best. Team Berk on three!” Seven hands joined her in the middle. “One, two, three, Team Berk!”

“Team Berk!” seven motivated kids repeated.

She high-fived every one of them before she let them go. Another glance at her watch informed her that she still had a few minutes, but when some of the parents engaged her in small talk and details about the next day, she started to feel impatient. Answering their questions as best (and fast) as she could, she waved goodbye to the lot and nearly sprinted over to her car.

Checking herself in the rear-view mirror and combing through her bangs with her fingers, she took a deep breath and started the engine. There was a forest waiting for her.

_______________

Every car that drove onto the parking lot turned out to be a disappointment. Even though they were probably good cars from good manufacturers (and some of them were, he could see that) and some looked really sleek, definitely better than his own heap of scrap metal – they all weren’t the car he was waiting for. Or rather waiting to see only, because he was actually waiting for the person who drove the car.

The people that emerged from the cars dug the hole of disappointment in his belly even deeper. He knew that those who hopped out wouldn’t be her, but actually seeing it smothered the small, excited flame inside him further. Because who knew, maybe she was getting a ride from someone, maybe she’d bought a new car in the last few days and didn’t mention it.

And maybe he shouldn’t work himself up over this so much. Because wasn’t he just waiting for a friend? Hadn’t he told his heart to shut up and lose the last dusty boxes of hope it was still storing in the back somewhere? He really needed to have a serious conversation with himself sometime soon.

For now, however, he could only focus on the street and the exit to the parking lot, the sound of tires on gravel slowly beginning to fuel his nervousness with every wrong car that showed up. He watched hikers, families, joggers, groups of teenagers, and dog walkers disappear between the trees. Knew that the crowd would disperse around the first picnic table at the big old oak tree. From there on, the pathways would lead in various directions deeper into the woods, forking off every now and then to meet again at a different point, direction signs and maps at every junction.

Two short honks made him wince and turn around, laying eyes on the small blue car maneuvering into a parking spot. Every disappointed drop of his stomach in the last twenty minutes was forgotten the moment the door opened and Astrid Hofferson stepped out, long hair shining in the sun like liquid gold, making his heart forget to beat for a long moment. Well, so much for getting over her.

“Hi!” she called over, shutting the door behind her and pressing a button on her key. Hiccup had to force himself to close his mouth and feebly wave back. Why did her legs have to look so long in her simple jeans? And what was it about her that exuded so much beautiful energy?

“Hey,” she said again when she reached him, putting her keys and phone in the little backpack she was carrying.

“Hey,” he managed to reply in a steady voice. Why was he doing this to himself? Why couldn’t he just stay away from her? Why did it have to be so hard?

“Let’s go?” she suggested when he just continued to stare at her, unable to formulate a coherent sentence. He still didn’t trust his brain to speak properly, so he just nodded and hummed in agreement. Only briefly did he consider turning on his heels and getting some distance, but she was already striding over to the first line of trees with purposeful steps. Like a loyal, devoted dog, he could do nothing but follow her.

The first few hundred yards on the wide main path, they walked in silence. Sometimes, their swinging hands would brush and every time he would recoil from the shock. For a split second, he could swear that her pinky curled around his. But when he glanced down, her fingers were tapping against her leg and he couldn’t tell if he’d imagined the contact. He decided it was smarter to stuff his hands in his pockets to stop himself from reaching for hers constantly.

“Where to now?” she asked once they reached the old oak. He hadn’t really thought about that beforehand; he usually just let his mind wander and his feet take him somewhere.

“Um… Let’s go right,” he said, pointing in the left direction. “Uh- That right.” He pointed the other way. From the corner of his eye, he noticed Astrid stifle a grin.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.” He could hear the amusement in her voice and he wanted to lie down and die. Then she lightly punched him in the arm and walked past him. His arm tingled like crazy and he didn’t want to die so much anymore.

Catching up to her, he mentally pulled up a map of the forest, loosely planning the route they could take. He wanted to steer away from the main paths a little, go where it was quiet and where there weren’t any babbling people and loud teenagers with their music and littering disturbing the scene. Besides, he kind of wanted to be alone with her, even if there was nothing he could do about it. He felt like he was trying to milk a bull.

“So–“

“What–“ she started at the same time. She swept her bangs out of her eyes and glanced at him, right when he glanced at her. They locked eyes for a few seconds, staring at each other with blank faces before they both burst out laughing. It successfully melted the awkward tension away.

“You go first,” she said.

“Wow, thanks, that- that’s so generous of you.”

“Okay, then I will–“

“Nope! You’ll get your turn. Be more patient, Astrid.” He jumped out of the way before she could sock him in the arm again. He probably should have seen it coming, though, that when he returned to her side, she used the opportunity to tackle him sideways. He staggered to the side with a surprised yelp.

“Oops! Was that too hard?” she asked with a falsely apologetic voice.

“I came here to have a good time,” Hiccup whined, rubbing his arm, “but I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now.” The incredulous grin on her face was worth all the pain (that she inflicted on him herself, but never mind that detail).

“Is that all you have to say, you dork?”

“No, I actually just wanted to ask how your day was. Yesterday, I mean. And today, so far. You had swim training, right?”

“I did.” She smiled and he felt safe enough to walk right beside her again. “Yesterday was pretty average. Almost boring, if it hadn’t been for your constant spamming of nerdy fantasy book stuff.”

“Constant spamming of nerdy stuff? You specifically asked me to tell you more!”

She shrugged. “Still nerdy.”

“So you’re calling yourself a nerd.”

“If anything, I’m a nerd for hearing my friends talk about their nerdy interests.”

“Are you trying to tell me you were not at all interested in the magic system of the book I had to read for work and that you did not keep asking very specific questions with a vocabulary that not at all insinuated that you obsessed over fantasy world settings before? Besides, you’re the one who’s been forwarding me all kinds of dog videos all week.”

She grumbled something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like, “You’re the nerd, shut up.”

“What was that?”

“So I had swim training today.” As she continued to tell him about the competition the next day, he couldn’t stop grinning and had trouble taking his eyes off her. God, he loved her. And there really was no way out.

Their comfortable banter rolled back and forth between them as they hiked deeper into the woods, soon leaving the main paths behind.

“How do you know this place so well?” she asked when he led her through the underbrush onto a clearing that she would have never discovered by herself.

“My dad took me here a lot when I was a kid. And when I got older, I went by myself. You know, just walking for hours, thinking, winding down, and sometimes the inspiration just hits.”

He strolled over to a thick tree lying on the ground and sat down. For a minute, he closed his eyes and let the sun warm his face. When he looked again, Astrid sat next to him, studying his face. He tried not to blush. “What?”

“What did you do with your dad when you came here?”

“Fishing, at a small lake in that direction.” He pointed ahead. “Well, he wanted to go fishing. I was mostly busy searching for trolls.”

She chuckled. “Sounds about right.”

“Yeah, I was that kind of kid.”

“I was the one wrestling all the boys on the playground to show them I was stronger.”

“Were you?”

“Of course! Anyone who tells you different is a liar. Especially Zack Bauman! He was only six years older, but definitely not stronger.”

“For the sake of my own health, I’ll choose to believe that.”

“Good.” She took off her backpack and pulled out a water bottle. “You’re smart.”

“I know.”

She drank from her water and frowned at him. “Didn’t you bring anything?”

“Why? It’s not like I’m going camping.”

“What if you get thirsty?”

He shrugged. “I’ll just drink from a stream.”

The pace at which her eyebrows rose was almost comical. “You know that’s not filtered, right? Dirt gets in there, rain polluted with fumes, it’s where fish die, and sometimes people pee in there!”

“So? Beauty of nature!”

With the way she continued to stare at him as if he was growing another head, it became harder and harder to keep up his poker face. Finally, he broke down, a grin breaking out over his face and his shoulders shaking with quiet laughter.

“Just kidding, I have water in the car. Besides, the running water here is actually pretty good.”

She rolled her eyes and tried to hide her smile. “I’m still not fully believing you, though. Here.” She held out her bottle to him. “It’s medium sparkling.”

“Thanks.” He took the bottle and started drinking. Only when his lips touched the opening, his brain caught up in the most annoying of ways, almost prompting him to choke on the water. What it told him wasn’t, oh this water is refreshing or I was more thirsty than I thought or something else mundane like, the color of the label is white and green.

No, what his brain screamed at him was: HER LIPS TOUCHED THIS! Admittedly, the way this particular thought affected him was less mature than he’d like to claim. In a way, wasn’t he indirectly kissing her over some kind of detour? (Oh god, he was pathetic.)

He handed her the bottle back, refusing to meet her eyes, willing the blush away that had crept onto his face and only felt impossibly warmer when she took another sip herself before she put the bottle away.

“Alright, let’s get going!” She jumped up from the trunk and planted herself in front of him. “Where to next?”

“Don’t you just want to sit and enjoy the moment for a few more minutes?”

“If I’d wanted to chill under trees, I’d have gone for my hammock. Come on!” She pulled him up by his arms and when he stood, he was suddenly so close to her, he could count the tiny freckles on her nose. But he didn’t get the chance to because she was already walking purposefully ahead again.

“Wrong direction.”

In one graceful move, she spun around and walked the other way.

“Just kidding, that was the right direction- Ow! No violence in these woods!” Rubbing his arm, he caught up to her.

“You brought this on yourself, pal. Now show me the way!”

For a while, they walked the beaten paths, evading stinging nettles and other overgrowing weeds. The air was warm and humid, the sun was trying to burn through the leaves and Hiccup was gladder than ever that he’d decided to wear short sleeves today (ignoring the nettles that were on a personal mission to cuddle him).

“Man, I can’t believe it’s only May, this feels like mid-July!”

Astrid snorted. “Are we back to awkward weather talks?”

“It’s not awkward if I’m complaining. Which I am.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. Berk used to be so cold when we were kids. Fricking climate change.”

“Nope, nuh-uh, we’re not having the climate change talk right now. If you want to ban weather talk, I’m banning climate change talk.”

“But I have opinions!”

“Big news, Astrid, we all do. We can talk about it another time.”

“Fine,” she grumbled and kicked at a pebble. “Then I’m not going to tell you about my cousin’s treehouse.”

“Okay, and I’m not gonna tell you how Snotlout and I became friends.”

“Who?”

He scratched his neck. “That guy that hit on you. At the park. Last Saturday.”

She chuckled. “Oh, right. I completely forgot about him. But yeah, what’s up with that?! I mean, I only spent, like, a minute with that guy and I wasn’t even paying attention to him, but I did hear how he tried to flirt with me.”

“That’s Snotlout for you. But first, I wanna hear about that treehouse.”

She hopped onto an oak log lying next to the path and balanced down its length, occasionally holding onto Hiccup’s shoulder to steady herself. “Well, when we were kids, my cousin had this treehouse he built with his dad. It had three stories, a ladder, walls with windows, a roof, even a fence. We played so many games of pretend up there and climbed through the trees.” She jumped from the end of the log, wiping a few strands of hair from her face that had escaped the braid falling down her back.

“Sounds fun.”

“It was. But then we got older and he wanted to play Fifa more than climb trees. I miss that sometimes,” she shrugged, glancing at him from the side, “pretending that the invisible enemy you’re hiding in a treehouse from is the most important thing in the world right now.”

With a loud smack, Hiccup hit the mosquito on his arm and successfully squashed it. “Gotcha!” He met Astrid’s bewildered expression. “Sorry, I didn’t want to interrupt you. These damn fuckers are early this year. And for some reason, they love me.”

“Oh, I’m sure they don’t love you,” she said with a wave of her hand. “They’re only using you to get to your blood.”

“Harsh.”

“Look, if they can suck it up, you can too. I need to know the Snotlout story.”

In that moment, Hiccup spotted something up ahead and a smirk spread on his face. “First of all, nice wordplay. And second – too bad that, once you get older, you can’t climb trees anymore.” And before she could answer, he sprinted off towards a large old oak stretching its limbs over the path in front of them.

He put his foot into a split in the trunk, held onto a branch and hauled himself upwards. He didn’t get far, though, before Astrid practically climbed over him, fast and agile and with a competitive determination.

“Hey, slowpoke!” she called down from a branch fork further up the tree.

“That’s a Pokémon,” he huffed while pulling himself higher up. Winded and with new scratches on the side of his arm, he finally made it next to the branch she was sitting on. He stayed in a slightly uncomfortable spot where part of the trunk split in two more parts, leaned against the bigger half and caught his breath. “How- how are you… so good at… at this? Phew! Wait, that… That was a stupid question.”

“It’s because I’m the best. But you’re not so bad yourself, look, we’re at least ten feet up! Probably even higher.”

“Yeah, that’s- Oh, that’s high up.” He looked down at the ground, glad he had enough tree to hold onto.

“Don’t fall.”

He shot her an unimpressed look. “Ha ha ha. Funny.”

“Or at least don’t until I heard the Snotlout-Hiccup origin story.”

Securing his footing, he made himself as comfortable as possible. He was high up in a tree with Astrid Hofferson in the middle of the woods. Just a normal Saturday.

“Fine, fine. Buckle up, it’s gonna be a ride. I was only a wee lad when–“

“Hiccup,” she interrupted, “you’re not Scottish.”

“Technically, I am. Partially. Half Berkian, one quarter Icelandic, the other Scottish. And if I believe my grandpa’s stories, both my dad’s and mom’s families are Viking descendants.”

“Hey, me too! Both my great-grandmas were from Sweden, and they definitely descended from Vikings. We still have my great-grandfather’s ancestry research collection in the attic somewhere.”

“Wow. No wonder you didn’t change your name when you got married. Keeping the Hofferson name, the legacy, and all that- that jazz.”

She averted her face. “Yeah. That’s the reason. Part of it, anyway.”

He got the clue that she didn’t want to talk about it further, so he changed the topic. “So, Snotlout and I were neighbors growing up.”

Her smile returned and she looked at him expectantly, like a kid waiting for its campfire story. It was adorable. He wanted to lean in and cherish that smile up close until he kissed it off her face…

“And that’s it?” her voice brough him back to reality. “You were neighbors? That’s the whole story?”

“Sorry, I kinda spaced out there. In the memories,” he quickly added. “Like I said, we were neighbors as kids and became friends along the way.” His cheeks were still burning. “Actually, Snotlout used to make fun of me a lot back then – okay, not much has changed, if I think about it… But I’d call it lovingly teasing instead of bullying now.”

She chuckled. “Lovingly teasing?”

“Or maybe respectful bullying that’s not meant to actually hurt and that I can shrug off as Snotlout being Snotlout?” He shrugged. “Call it whatever you like.”

“Respectful bullying,” she repeated and pushed a leaf out of her face. She had to stick the twig behind a branch so it didn’t swing back in her face. He could relate. He’d been there too many a time. “How’d he go from bullying to respectful bullying, then?”

“When we were eight, I built a trap that knocked out two of his teeth. Gained his respect for life. Or maybe he’s just scared of me.”

She laughed, and it was music to his ears. “Yes, you’re very scary. All of… this is making me cower and shiver in fear.”

“Did you just gesture to all of me?”

“Well, all of you is very scary.”

“Uh-huh, sure.” He leaned his face against the forked off part of the trunk and she adapted her position right after. Her gorgeous eyes were so much bigger in this light. It was like looking into the summer sky. She licked her lips. He gulped hard, yearning to close the gap and melt into her, hallowing this tree forever.

She blinked a couple times and shook her head, breaking him out of his trance as well. How many times had she sucked him in already, lifting him from the ground, into a dreamlike state, like some kind of mind-bending drug? He needed to get a grip on himself and stop drifting off every time she so much as looked at him.

“Uhh… Where was I?” he asked and cleared his throat when his voice came out too raspy. For his own safety, he leaned back against the thick trunk. Just in case.

“Teeth and respect.”

“Right.” He rubbed his neck. “Yeah. So. We, uh, we kind of hung out together after a while, but, like, separately?” His hands started gesticulating on their own and without the additional support, his balance began to shift dangerously to the side so he held onto the next best branch again. As soon as his hands were out of the conversation, his shoulders took over and he felt the soft vibrations in the tree. “What I mean is, we would both be at the playground, but we didn’t interact much, until one of us had an idea to share or needed help with something. Over time, we grew closer, and then suddenly, we realized we were friends. We would never say it, but we both knew.”

“Aw, that’s cute.”

He snorted. “Don’t tell him that, he’ll deny everything.”

“Oh, in that case, I will definitely tell him that the next time I see him.”

Hiccup’s heart leaped at the idea of her spending time with his friends. It meant she would continue to be in his life. “When you do, please make sure I’m there to witness.”

“That’s a given.” She grinned and he had to force himself to believe that, in that moment, the sun only coincidentally lit up her eyes even brighter.

“Good.” He grinned back. “Anyway, I think I already told you this, but I had social phobia as a teen, low self-esteem and – yeah. It was hard to maintain friendships, but Snot was kind of a constant in my life. Someone who stuck with me, despite constantly complaining about my general loserness in public. Sometimes, late at night, when I’d climbed the roof of our house again because I was in one of my down phases and wanted to be left alone, he could see that from his bedroom window.”

While he talked, she pulled out a granola bar from her backpack. She broke it in two and handed him one half, munching on the other. Their fingers brushed. He was enjoying every little moment of this day, no matter how much he would suffer from it in the long run.

“Thanks... So he snuck over and kept me company, even though I didn’t wanna talk or see anyone. He would just sit there with me, keeping his distance, and tell me how he thought I actually didn’t suck and that other people sucked who didn’t see that. Coming from that guy, that’s the highest form of compliment you can think of. Because it was one hundred percent earnest.”

He bit off a piece of his granola snack, humming when the taste of raspberry and nuts exploded in his mouth. “We also both had problems with our dads,” he continued before swallowing the food, “so we bonded over that, too. And then I went to therapy and my dad made an effort to help and things got way better between me and him. Snot’s dad, though… He’s still an ass.”

While the last of the granola bar disappeared between his teeth, she regarded him thoughtfully. Eventually, she said, “I knew it was worth it asking for this story.”

“Oh? How so?”

She shrugged. “Because I figured there was no way you’d be friends with a guy like Snotlout if there wasn’t more to it, or to him. Because there’s more to you.”

“Oh. Uh…” he ran a hand through his hair, combing out a small bug in the process. “I guess…” His fingers tingled with the urge to reach for her hand so badly. He clapped his hands together in order to ignore the sensation. “So! What now?” he asked, maybe a little too loudly.

“I don’t know, you’re the one with the plan.”

“Right…” He pulled up his mental map. “How about we keep walking? There’s a stream not far ahead.”

“Sounds good to me.”

He nodded a few times before glancing past his feet. “…So how do I get back down?”

[jjmaebank]

Justin Foley - Did You Kill Him?

A/N: I know I've been sooo inactive and basically haven't written in over a year but the trailer for the new season of 13rw got me rewatching the series and I just feel like writing for them again idk lol, but I should most definitely be getting on w my college applications rn oops

Your boyfriend Justin has been avoiding you for the last 2 weeks and is clearly keeping a secret, little do you know it's got to do with the murder of Bryce Walker...

-

Your boyfriend Justin had been acting off all of this week and last, he'd been avoiding your calls and kept interaction at a minimum at school. You were beginning to think maybe he'd started using again after staying clean for so long. But if that was it, why would he be avoiding you? He still seemed normal with Clay and people, I mean as normal as he could with the Jensens adopting him and all.

Eventually you decided enough was enough. You were practically getting the silent treatment from your own boyfriend, or at least that's what it felt like, and you deserved to know what was going on in his life or at least a reason for why he was shutting you out.

You couldn't imagine that Justin would be anywhere other than the Jensens house on a Thursday evening so you hopped in your car and drove down the familiar route. You arrived at the Jensen household but didn't see Clay's car parked outside. Nevertheless, you proceeded to knock on the front door and hope the two troubled teenagers were home.

"Hey (Y/N), is everything okay? Justin didn't tell us you'd be coming over," Mr Jensen said in his typical friendly and welcoming manner.

"Oh, yeah everything's fine Mr Jensen, sorry to show up so unannounced but is Justin here? I really need to talk to him," you asked.

"No, he isn't actually. Him and Clay left a while ago, said they were working on some group project at Tony's house?" Mr Jensen responded, just as gullible as ever to his sons' cleverly crafted lies.

"Oh right...sorry to bother you then, could you maybe just tell him I stopped by and to call me?" You sulked.

"Why don't you just wait here with Lainie and I? The boys should be back soon, it's a school night and we'd love the company," Mr Jensen smiled.

"I wouldn't want to intrude..." You replied.

"Not at all, come on in," Mr Jensen gestured for you to walk in and shut the door behind you.

-

About half an hour later you heard the front door open and close, followed by an exchange of angry whispering.

"Clay? Justin?" Lainie yelled from the living room.

"Yeah Mom?" You heard Clay reply from the other side of the wall.

"Could you come in here please?" His mom responded, "Justin too."

You then saw the two boys walk through the door into the living room, both of them taken aback  when seeing you sat on the couch with their parents.

"(Y/N)? What are you doing here?" Justin asked, surprise evident in his voice.

"I need to talk to you Justin," you responded, standing up from your spot on the couch.

"At 9 pm on a Thursday night?" He raised his eyebrow, "why didn't you just call me?"

"Well I would've but you don't really answer my calls anymore," you replied, raising your voice a little. How can he act as if nothing's up?

"We'll just leave you to it..." Mr Jensen said rather awkwardly, switching off the TV, "just let us know you get home safe (Y/N) alright?"

"Yeah sure thing Mr Jensen," you responded as him and Lainie went upstairs.

"What did you need to talk about?" Justin asked.

You looked over at Clay who was still in the room, his nosey nature clearly keeping him from giving you and your boyfriend privacy and shot him a look signalling you wanted to be alone.

"Oh right it's like boyfriend girlfriend stuff..." Clay nodded, clicking his tongue awkwardly before turning on his heels and leaving too.

"What's wrong babe?" Justin asked.

"Don't call me babe, Justin, I could ask you the same thing!" You exclaimed, your anger starting to show itself now that it was just you and him.

"What do you mean?"

He was still playing the oblivious card, which was only fuelling your anger more.

"Are you fucking kidding me? You avoid all my calls, hardly speak to me at school or text me for that matter, it's like you don't want to talk to me...so what the fuck is up with you not me?"

Justin began to tap his foot, a sign you knew too well of him trying to come up with a bullshit excuse, "I've just been really busy, that's all. I didn't mean to make you feel like I didn't want to talk to you though."

"Cut the crap Justin, you're clearly not too busy for Clay and Tony, and even Jessica!"

"What are you trying to say?" Justin replied, starting to get angry.

"I don't fucking know Justin! All I know is you're acting normal with almost everyone but me, and I want to know why! What's going on that I don't know about?"

At this point, your anger was clashing with his, this had always been an issue in your relationship, you were both hot tempered and stubborn.

"Nothing! For fucks sake (Y/N), nothing okay! Besides...even if there was something you'd probably be better off not knowing..." he mumbled the last part, but just clear enough for you to comprehend.

"So there is something?" You continued to grill him.

"Wha-no!" Justin rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

"Stop fucking lying to me Justin! I'm sick of it! I'm sick of being your girlfriend but not actually feeling like it!" You yelled.

"Then maybe you shouldn't..." he whispered.

"Shouldn't what..." You responded in an equally hushed tone, hoping he wasn't insinuating what you thought he was.

"Be my girlfriend," he whispered, looking down at his shoes.

"Can't even look me in the eyes when breaking up with me huh?" You replied, tears welling up in your eyes.

"(Y/N)...." Justin began but you cut him off.

"Just save it okay? Clearly whatever it is you're hiding is worth more than our entire relationship to you," you said, wiping the tears from your eyes and making your way to the front door.

"(Y/N)...I want to tell you...but I don't want you to leave me..." Justin said, his voice pained and his eyes starting to tear up.

"Nothing you say can change the way that I feel about you, don't you get that?" You responded, a last bit of hope resurfacing that maybe your boyfriend will let you back into his life and it wouldn't have to end, at least not in this way.

"This would...(Y/N), please you don't understand!" Justin said, tears rolling down his cheeks at this point.

"Then help me understand!" You exclaimed.

"I-I can't," Justin said, his voice cracking.

"I see..." you responded looking him in the eyes, "bye Justin."

With that you turned around and walked out the house.

"Wait! (Y/N)! Please, just trust me that you're better off not knowing this!" Justin pleaded, following you down the front steps and to your car.

"I don't hide anything from you Justin, I thought we were past that...and clearly my love for you isn't enough to prove to you that nothing you say or do will change how I feel...because you still keep me in the dark and make me feel like you don't trust me!" You exclaimed, getting in your car.

"It's not like that! It's not that I don't trust you! I can't explain it I just don't want you to think I'm a monster!" Justin cried.

"I could never think that Justin, I can't keep telling you this, so I'm not sure whether it's your insecurity of me not loving you enough or you just not trusting me...but either one is damaging our relationship right now, and I can't keep doing this." You replied, tears spilling down your cheeks as you slammed your car door shut and drove off, leaving your boyfriend stood outside his house, cursing himself for what he's done.

A/N: probably gonna make a part two for this where (Y/N) finds out what Justin's been keeping and that he was just trying to protect her from the truth.

[junker-town]

The Patriots’ offensive problems were everyone’s fault (even Tom Brady’s)

Tom Brady and the Patriots lost in the Wild Card Round for the first time in a decade.

The Patriots were a mess on offense, and it was too much for them to overcome. Geoff Schwartz explains why there’s plenty of blame to go around.

The wicked witch of the NFL is dead for the 2019 season! The New England Patriots, with their six Super Bowls and with the mystique of playoff games in Foxborough, were ousted in the postseason by the red-hot Tennessee Titans. Contrary to popular belief, the Titans won this game not because of their rushing attack, but because of the Patriots’ inability to function on offense.

The Patriots’ offensive problems weren’t just one person’s fault, but a collective failure of all the parts.

Without being too obvious, the goal of an offense is scoring points. To score points, an offense needs to be efficient. Efficiency is built through gameplanning, install of plays, coaching, practice, and technique. It’s also built with an understanding of your weaknesses.

Your quarterback can only do so much? You get him easy throws and take chances when provided. You have an offensive lineman or two who aren’t as good as the rest? Give them help. Have a couple of slow WRs? You find formations to get them into open spaces.

When you know what your weaknesses are, you can devise a gameplan to make it work.

For example, when I started my first game in 2009 with the Panthers, the team was worried about putting me into the lineup. They changed protections to help me at right tackle. I got a tight end more often, some running chips. We put in designed rollouts to limit my exposure to pass rushers. In the run game, we set up some double teams. The game went awesome. I played well and we beat a Vikings team that lost late in that year’s NFC Championship Game.

You should be able to hide one or two deficiencies, but what happens when you have multiple issues at once? Well, you’re the Patriots from this past weekend in the Wild Card Round.

Their offense is a perfect example of why an entire side of the ball, or a unit, can struggle: a different person will screw up each play. First, it’s the right guard. Next play, it’s the wide receiver. Then it’s the QB. Oops, now the running back.

When this happens, you can’t “hide” any member of the offense. The playcalling can be conservative because the playcaller doesn’t trust the operation to work, and therefore pulls it back.

As one could imagine, all of this would make a quarterback not play as well. And when that quarterback is 42 years old with some loss of arm strength, it would shake his confidence in the offense. This all showed in the final two months with Tom Brady. He was not confident in receivers outside of Julian Edelman. And while there were signs that Brady is getting old and his play is diminishing, for the most part, that wasn’t the case against the Titans. Other than a few throws, he was his usual pinpoint self.

With that being said, let’s break down the Patriots’ offensive performance from Saturday to show how and why an offense doesn’t work.

8 different times a Patriots player screwed up on offense

Here’s a look at the mistakes the offense made, and who was most at fault, against the Titans.

1. First quarter, 12:46, third-and-3: Right tackle Marcus Cannon

The Patriots marched all the way down the field on their first drive. It was third down and they were attempting a play-action pass here. Linebackers read the action of the OL through to the running back. If an offensive lineman doesn’t sell the run, the linebackers will immediately drop. In general, the Titans attempted all game to limit the Patriots’ ability to generate big plays off play-action pass. They stayed in a two-high safety look, and the safeties never stepped up on run action.

But this play is one where they didn’t need the safeties to move at all, just the one linebacker. Right tackle Marcus Cannon didn’t sell the run on this play. Maybe he thought a twist was coming, or the Titans were bringing pressure and that the linebacker was dropping so he wanted to scoop up the three-technique. Cannon is normally good at play-action sell, as we saw the rest of the game.

However, him not selling the run allowed the linebacker to attempt to hit Edelman and drop back into coverage to disrupt this throw.

Rashaan Evans might have been dropping anyway, but selling the run would’ve held him a count, just long enough to open a window. I think Brady thought he wouldn’t be there because this ball could have easily been intercepted.

A tiny technique error might have cost the Pats an early touchdown.

2. First quarter, 3:41, first-and-10: Left guard Joe Thuney and fullback Elandon Roberts

Here’s a toss play. It was set up well with the FB and OC having good pre-snap leverage. Left guard Joe Thuney missed on the linebacker, but Elandon Roberts, the backup fullback who’s actually a linebacker, took a poor angle on the play and whiffed on the LB (what do you expect from a LB playing FB?).

The right tackle knocked the DE so far back that even getting a decent block on that linebacker would have given the Patriots a giant gain.

3. Second quarter, 0:18, second-and-10: Wide receiver N’Keal Harry

The Patriots were trying to score points to end the first half, and they had the right playcall against this deep Cover 2 defense. N’Keal Harry didn’t appear to be running full speed and the connection, which can be made, was an incomplete pass.

4. Third quarter, 9:24, first-and-10: Wide receiver N’Keal Harry

Now we start getting into the meat of the issues. Look at this entire clusterf*** of a drive. Early in the third quarter, the Patriots were attempting to start the half hot. Brady threw a quick pass to Harry, who promptly dropped it.

Notice Brady’s body language afterward. Yikes.

5. Third quarter, 9:19, second-and-10: Quarterback Tom Brady

This was another hard play-action and Brady had two options. He opted for Edelman, as he normally does, but it’s a bad throw.

You could argue he should have targeting the deeper corner, but Edelman was open.

6. Third quarter, 9:14, third-and-10: Right guard Shaq Mason

Next play, it’s third-and-10. Brady had time to throw but couldn’t find anyone. He broke the pocket and started to move toward the line of scrimmage. As this was happening, right guard Shaq Mason tried to block the nearest defender. Mason lost track of the line of scrimmage and/or he believed Brady was running the ball.

Either way, their best pass play of the game — a 38-yard gain — was brought back by this illegal man downfield.

7. Fourth quarter, 12:58, third-and-3: Right tackle Marcus Cannon

The offensive line played an awesome game against the Titans. They protected Brady and ran the ball decently well. So of course when the Titans rushed three, Brady got crushed and he wasn’t able to hit the open WR for a big first down.

Now, to be fair, Brady drifted to his left when he could’ve stepped up in the pocket, but drifting doesn’t excuse the one poor block Cannon had in pass pro. It’s being a lineman.

8. Fourth quarter, 3:26, second-and-4: Wide receiver Julian Edelman

And now to top it off, the most trusted Patriot, Edelman, dropped a sure 10-yard catch that would have continued a drive. Most people believe, and so do I, that if Edelman catches this pass, the Patriots would have eventually scored to tie or win the game.

So in those plays, we have the left guard, fullback, right tackle, right guard, multiple wide receivers, and the quarterback all making costly mistakes. Now let’s get to the playcalling and general philosophy when you’re calling a game without trust in your offensive parts.

The playcalling wasn’t doing the Patriots any favors either

The Patriots were rolling early. They gained 21 yards and 29 yards on back-to-back plays on their first possession. They entered the part of the field, between the 25- and 40-yard line, where trick plays tend to happen. They attempted a flea flicker against the Titans’ defense and the one person who needed to be fooled, the backside corner, was not.

Early flea flicker probably would have worked if it called for a different route for Sanu. If he was able to continue across the field, he had acres of greenery. The cutback to his side of the field led him back to the defender, whom'st he would've easily burned across the field. pic.twitter.com/tOE5PC3HNU

— Michael Hurley (@michaelFhurley) January 6, 2020

I don’t like the call because it had become predictable in this situation and because the offense had struggled to generate explosive plays this year.

In the second quarter, the Patriots had a third-and-1 ... and they called a fullback dive. I have no idea what they were thinking here. They were trying to get cute again is my guess, but it felt like Josh McDaniels was just trying to find some offense from wherever.

This last play is one that I think sums all the Patriots’ issues up best. For years, they’ve taken whatever the defense gave them, or put a defense in a tough spot because of their offensive scheme, design, and playcalling.

This year, the Patriots were like many teams that can’t create big plays: They tried to force the issue, which normally doesn’t work.

In the middle of the second quarter, the Patriots were in base personnel, with a fullback in the I formation. The Titans were in a two-high shell. When defenses are playing two-high with a fullback in the game, you should run the ball. There are not enough defenders in the box. The offense could run a weak ISO play, or a man scheme to the tight end. There are plenty of options.

Instead, the Patriots forced a play-action pass against a poor look to throw the ball.

In years past, this play could be killed in favor of a run against two-high safeties. Mature offenses, and ones in which the coach trusts the whole operation, would be set up in this manner. But here, it’s clear the Patriots didn’t trust the entire offense and tried to force things. And the Titans were prepared.

As you can see, the Patriots’ offense was a mess. They had different players screwing up on different plays, and they weren’t able to overcome the issues. Credit the Titans because the defense played well, but in the end, the dysfunction on offense was too much for the Pats to overcome. You just can’t gameplan for a different player making a mistake on each play.

[snowdice]

Goblin Brain Study Session Fic 1 [Day 35]

Because I don’t want to just have walls of text for my Goblin Brain Study Session posts, I’m separating them by days. If you want to read the previous chapters, click the links below. Chapter 13 and what I have done of Chapter 14 is under the cut.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12

See this post for more details and feel free to send me asks to keep me going! It’s been a lot of fun so far! I will reblog this post with the story as I write them today.

The Gobiln Brain is a problem today. I’d planned to start like 2 hours ago. :/

Remy was slumped down in his seat as Emile continued to lecture him on all the possible consequences of his actions in the past 24 hours. Jeezy creezy was Emile miffed about all of that. Remy had been trying to blow it off, but Emile was fully, painfully aware that he almost had lost his brother today and Remy was going to hear about it until Emile’s lungs aches.

“And another thing…” he said.

“Wait,” Remy said, and Emile did because there was a lace of panic to his tone.

“What?” Emile asked.

“The tracker stopped working,” Remy answered pushing buttons a little bit desperately on his device.

“It went completely offline somehow,” Remy said.

“Did it get turned off?” Emile asked. “Or run out of batteries?”

“It doesn’t turn off and the batteries are designed to last for years,” Remy said. “It can even track through 20 feet of water. The only way it could stop sending a single this abruptly is if the thing was destroyed.”

Emile paused. “You said Virgil knows what the blinking light means.”

“Yes.”

“Is it possible that he knows, or well, ‘knows,’ you’re dead? Barbara did send a man after him, he could have mentioned it.”

Remy stared down at the device in his hands.

He pressed a couple of buttons and studied the screen for a moment. “You little shit,” he groaned. “You threw it out the fucking car window, didn’t you?”

“How do you know?” Emile asked.

“Because if I look at the history, it was going at 65 miles per hour down the interstate, suddenly stopped cold, and then broke when another car inevitably crushed it.”

“Ah.”

“Well, at least the fucker’s probably okay. Dammit Virgil! Where are you going?” Remy pushed a few more buttons almost idly as he thought. “Let me get into Virgil’s head for a minute: emo music, dark clothes, would rather have his toenails ripped out than go to parties, makes split second decisions based on little info. Yep! Got him.”

Emile rolled his eyes, but Remy wouldn’t have noticed as he had his own eyes closed. “Hmm. So, I’m Virgil. My bitch mom killed my dad and sent someone after me. I have no idea what’s going on, but I bolt out of there because fuck mom. I want to get the hell out of dodge so I convince someone to drive me somehow, I guess, but where would I want to go? Someplace safe. Where’s safe? Maybe Emile, but obviously that’s not where he went. Or Janus, but he’s too connected to mom. I don’t really no anyone else, especially not someone who could help with this sort of stuff.”

Remy thought for another long moment. “Oops.”

“Oops?” Emile asked. “What oops?”

He could tell by the expression on Remy’s face that he was not going to like the answer. “I may have let something… slip.”

“What do you mean, Remington?”

“Um, well you see,” Remy said. “A couple of months ago Virgil was being, you know, himself: a little shit. He may have, possibly, found some papers.”

“What kind of papers?” Emile asked.

“They were nothing important!” Remy assured. “There wasn’t any dangerous info in them or anything, but…”

“But?”

“It is somewhat possible that they had the name on them.”

“How possible?” Emile asked, eyes narrowed on him.

“He asked what Green Bellow Foods was and why they needed 50 top of the line computers outfitted at an old factory.”

“And what did you tell him?!”

“Nothing!”

Emile glared at him.

“Okay, well I had to tell him something,” Remy mentioned. “I just kind of said that I knew the owner well and was working with him on some stuff. Then I told him not to worry about it, which was probably a mistake, because he’s Virgil. So, then I found him snooping in my car. At that point I had to sit him down and talk to him. So, I told him a bit about Logan.”

“Remy that’s not nothing!”

“I didn’t use his name or anything. I just told him a couple of really, extremely, tremendously, vague stories, so he didn’t think I owed money to the mafia. Which, yes, he did suggest.”

“That’s worse!”

“What do you want from me Emile?!”

“Some common sense!” Emile answered. “I’ve been comparing you to the rat in Ratatouille for years, but I’m starting to think you’re more of a Pinky from Pinky and the Brain.”

“Hey, ouch,” Remy replied. “Also, I personally subscribe to the theory that Pinky is actually the intelligent one who is foiling Brain’s evil plots from the inside. So, there.”

“Now is not the time,” Emile said.

“Oh, it’s not the time to discuss cartoon theories?” Remy mumbled into his lap. “Must be serious.”

“It is serious! Virgil is missing!”

“Don’t you think I know that?!” Remy snapped. “I know, Emile.”

There was quiet. Emile took a breath. “Okay,” he said, calmer. “Do you really think he’s going to Logan?”

“He’s headed somewhere,” Remy answered, “and wherever that somewhere is, it’s inexplicably down the most direct route towards base.”

“Well, Virgil is smart. I don’t think he’d just keep going so quickly without a destination in mind. We should call Logan.”

“Do you honestly believe Barbara doesn’t have your phone tapped when Virgil is missing? If you had one of Logan’s phones, I might agree with you, but as it is, we’d be giving away our position, and possibly clueing her in to Virgil’s plan. If he shows up at base, Logan will take him in no question asked. It’s less dangerous for everyone this way.”

“Fine,” Emile said. “We’ll just keep driving towards Logan and hope you’re right about where he’s going.”

“Of course, I’m right,” Remy said lightly. “I’ve got the paternal instincts going on. Course, they didn’t stop the knife throwing incident of ’09. I blame Janus for that, though.”

Emile shook his head at him.

“It is good for when he tries to steal sweets, or that one time he brought home a baby piglet and tried to hide it from me in his bedroom. Or when he’s feeling anxious about something but won’t tell me because he thinks it’s silly.” Remy’s own fingers tapped out an anxious pattern against his knee. “It also worked with the golf cart incident, but it was too late. Again, I blame Janus. He messes with the paternal instinct meter. He’s far too unpredictable and I make the mistake of thinking he’s responsible, which he is half the time, but the other half of the time I remember that he’s still mostly a kid and one that grew up in an unstable environment. Did I tell you that last month they went and won a bunch of tickets at the arcade and used them to get those 5 ticket rubber ducks and just unloaded them all over my room? Honestly, you’d think a 21-year-old would have a better use for his money or at least have the brains to go buy them at a store. He could have gotten like 500 more ducks for the same amount of money. Of course, it was his mom’s money, so I guess I can get behind wasting it on arcade games and rubber ducks. The prank was apparently based on some comedy sketch Virgil found online.”

“You’re doing the thing again,” Emile pointed out calmly.

“Stop psych evaluating me,” he shot back.

“Fine, fine,” Emile said. “Keep distracting yourself from your emotional responses with silly stories. See if I care.”

“Thank you,” Remy replied. “I will.”

Emile sighed as he started back up again mumbling something about having taken away Virgil’s Gameboy after catching him playing it at 3 o’clock in the morning. He claimed this wasn’t because the boy hadn’t gotten any sleep, but because he insulted Donkey Kong to Remy’s face. After that story had run its course, Remy continued to babble at an increasingly fast pace about all sorts of things. Emile imagined most of the stories he sprouted out were quite embellished.

He’d tried to turn on the radio once, but Remy had slapped his hand away saying, “The next one’s a really good one.” So, he had resigned himself to his fate of tuning out Remy’s coping mechanism to the best of his abilities and just focusing on driving for the next 45 minutes. Which is probably why he noticed that traffic had strangely decreased. He didn’t really pay that much mind until the traffic suddenly increased… in the form of a wall of stopped cars.

“Jenkies, what’s going on?” he asked, as he came to a stop at the end of the line of cars.

“Um…” Remy said looking out of his car window. There, staring into their car with beady black eyes was a cow. As Emile watched, said cow leaned forward to drag its tongue across the passenger side window. “Shit.”

Chapter 14

“You two doing okay back there?” Roman asked, glancing into the rearview window at them as he exited the interstate onto highway 236.

“We’re perfectly fine,” Janus replied evenly.

“Ow ow ow ow ow! You’re crushing me!” Remus complained. Janus was currently sitting on his chest, pinning him to the back seat.

“You should probably put your seatbelt on,” Roman advised.

“You’re probably right,” Janus agreed.

“No! Get off!” Remus said. “Or I’m going to scream!”

“Oh, because you don’t scream randomly when someone isn’t sitting on top of you?” Janus shot back. Roman officially liked Janus; he’d just decided. “Give me that!” Janus said, and a moment later, Remus’s phone was thrown into the passenger seat.

Remus whined and Roman glanced back at them once again, amused. That is when he caught sight of a car behind them. He glanced at his speedometer and then back at the car. Roman was currently going a little over 90mph, having slowed down a bit now that they were off the interstate. Yet, the car was gaining on them.

“Hey,” Roman said. “Wh-,” and that’s when a bullet came through the back window right past Janus’s head. “Holy fuck!” Roman screamed, swerving a bit before getting the car back under control. Remus grabbed Janus by the front of his shirt and pulled him down as more bullets rained on them courtesy of the car Roman had spotted. The glass from his car’s back window shattered over the two of them.

Roman pressed his foot down harder on the accelerator and started purposefully swerving to throw off their shots as Remus shoved Janus down onto the floor so he could lunge into the front seat. He grabbed the gun Roman stored in his glove box and loaded it with practiced ease.

“My bag,” Janus requested, and Remus threw the asked for object over his shoulder before rolling down the window.

“Methinks mommy dearest’s people may have found us,” Remus commented.