#actual garbage im being so serious. you people suck at liking good music im sorry

[cs300]

sorry not sorry for going on a music poll reblog spree but ermmmmm you people followed me for my autisms so autisms be upon ye

[honestkpopreviews]

STRAY KIDS COMEBACK: CLÉ 2: YELLOW WOOD

Hello. I am back again with another Kpop comeback review, this time it’s with Stray Kids, yet another group that I know nothing about except that they’re under JYP, they’re apparently self-produced and they‘re rookies, debuted in 2018 I believe. I’m not too sure about that, but yeah. Now, I will admit that I already went ahead and listened to the title track, “Side Effects,” but for this review I will be listening again. Here we go.

1. Road Not Taken

Do you ever go on your instagram and just kind of start scrolling through people’s stories and you come across someone at a rave and they post a video of the music playing? That’s what the beginning of this song sounds like to me. It’s super electronic. It might just be the fact that it’s late (it’s currently 3am) but this sounds like a whole lot of noise to me. Like the kind of noise that frustrates you. My headphone volume isn’t that loud but this song is just... loud. The bass drop part was underwhelming I thought they were going to go off but they didn’t. Ok.. now another bass drop seems like. Ok ok ok I thought the bass wasnt going to drop but it kind of did. cool, i like the instrumental. .... AND NOW ITS OVE.R OK THAT was unexpected and kind of underwhelming??? i kind of expected more from a song with a lot of buildup. I don’t know. It was alright. As far as a review, I can’t say that anything about them particularly stands out. The vocals so far are pretty generic, but then again this isn’t the kind of song that showcases vocal ability. Moving on

2. Side Effects

I’m currently paused as I write this because like I said, I already listened to this song and because of that, I’m really not looking forward to clicking on this play button. This song is laughable. In fact, I actually did laugh in the middle of the song because I really couldn’t believe that this song made it past the initial producing stage. I really really want to know WHO made this and kept going. gENUINELY, why did they keep adding shit to this song. WHY. I’m genuinely shocked. It’s so bad. I don’t know how they managed to do it but they created a chaotic song that is completely offbeat, loud, and trash. All at once. But that is just what I can say from pure memory. Maybe listening to it this time will change my mind. I’m about to click play. Right off the bat, this song doesn’t make any fucking sense. Because the beginning doesn’t sound like what i remember this song to sound like, which is loud noise. AAAND THERE IT IS. 0:16. That’s when shit starts to go left. Shit starts REALLY sounding like it’s going left at 0:30. SHIT REALLY GOES LEFT AT 0:40 WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT OKDSGJHDSFJ BRO THESE MOTHERFUCKERS ARE SCREAMING IM LITERALLY ABOUT TO START HYSTERICALLY LAUGHING AGAIN BRO TEARS ARE STARTING TO FORM I CAJRDHSJDNRDKMJ WHAT TH FUVCK G THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE OMG NOW SHIT IS GOING LEFT AGAIN AT 1:30 BITCH LFMAKLRJIOFAN BRO IM SORRY BUT THE DUDE THAT JUST GOES OFF ALONE AT 1:30 IS SENDING ME WHY DOES THIS SOUND SO SERIOUS DFJKGJKSDHGEHEOIRGNFDJK SHITS ABOUT TO LEFT AGAIN I FEEL IT YUP 1:40 HOLY FUCK WHO IS RAPPING HE SOUNDS LIKE HOT FUCKING GARBAGE WHY ARE THEY LITERALLY SCREAMING WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SONG ABOUT KGHSERDFKKDFJKSL THIS BRIDGE DOESNT MAKE ANY SENSE WHY DOES THIS SOUND LIKE 5 DIFFERENT SONGS WHO THE FUCK PRODUCED THIS LET ME FIND OUT THIS IS ONE OF THESE STRAY KIDS PRODUCING THIS FUCK ASS SONG BRO .... the only cool part was the one where the guy says some shit after the bridge and then the beat goes off but even that is questionable this song is hot garbage bro

3. TMT

Considering how aggressive Side Effects was, I’m genuinely scared for TMT because the title makes it sound like there will be more screaming and noise. What I’ve noticed so far about stray kids is that their music, no matter how low i put my headphones, is still loud as fuck and noisy. I dont know how the fuck they managed to do that but they did, congrats Stray Kids. Anyways, TMT just started and I don’t like how it sounds already. This rapper. I don’t know how to describe what he sounds like. By no means the worst voice, we can thank Ateez for setting that bar, but there’s something about this song that i don’t like. It’s probably the fact that it sounds so discontinuous, like they’re trying to fit 104925892 songs in one. Like, I know that Kpop is known to do that, but at least it makes sense and feels continuous. This does not. this sounds like they said, “well we have rappers and we have singers and you cant sing on a beat and you cant rap on a melody so make it work... by adding both at random intervals”. This song is not good. By my standards, of course. It’s not the worst thing I’ve heard but it’s also not something I would willingly listen to.

4. Mixtape #1

I literally don’t like this. It’s a softer sound, it’s generic like I don’t know how to describe it. It’s so uneventful that talking about it is dumb there’s really nothing to say about it. I don’t like the rapping part, and again this feels like 3 different songs at once. The rapping sounds forced. I don’t know what I expected from the same company that produced Got7, the worst rapline in kpop. Although, the more i start exploring the more I start to realize that Got7 might just not be that bad. That’s kind of sad considering Got7 is mediocre.

5. Mixtape #2

Ew this is acoustic and something tells me if they try to put a stray kids twist on this song I will NOT like it . OK the singing is aggressive as hell what the fuck. I think THATS the problem i have with stray kids so far is that nOTHING flows like, not the voices, the instrumentals, NOTHING.. JYP what the fuck you really don’t give a fuck about your boy groups you have them singing shit like this and you give them the OK to go ahead and make fools of themselves? this is EMBARRASSING this song sucks and is uneventful i am skipping.

6. Mixtape #3

The song starts with the audio tag “dope flamingo” what the FUCK. YO WHO THE FUCK STARTS RAPPING AT 0:40 SHUT THE FUCK UP. oo i like the voice after the shit rapper. here we go with more off beat shit, during the second verse it sounds like theres a fucking maraca just shaking like that had no buisness being there at all. whoever is singing “blessings waiting for YOUuUuuoouuuuuuUuuuuUUU” sounds nice. Not perfect but nice. Decent vocals. This one is ok, but i still wouldn’t willingly listen.

7. Mixtape #4

That rapper sounds like shit bro i hate that the song started like that and I cant explain why these songs sound so bad they’re just so off beat. rappers will be agressive as fuck over a cute melody?W”W?@#? IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE. I should admit that at this point i have stopped listening. I only let it play for 45 seconds. I’m literally just tired. I don’t want to hear them anymore. Their music legit sucks. It’s off beat, loud, noisy trash. Even when it wasnt trying to be. It’s just loud trash. Im glad i stopped subjecting myself to that. i’m sorry but it sucks. At this point, I’d have to rate the groups I’ve listened to so far.

1. Got7

2. Ateez

3. Stray Kids

i really didn’t think that anything could be worse than Got7 but I was wrong. I really was. Got7 might actually be god tier now because FUCK do these new kpop boys suck. ok bye