#actual convo i had with my parents when i was maybe 10/11 or so
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sundere1181 · 1 year ago
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Little me: so like if someone murdered someone while they were sleepwalking and regretted it theyd still be arrested?
my parents: yes
little me: but they didnt meant to do it? they were sleepwalking, they themselves didnt do it, at least not on purpose
my parents: theyd still go to jail
little me: they dont even try to help that person get rid of their sleepwalking? just straight to jail?
my parents: yes
little me: thats fucked up. im going to be an anarchist when i grow up.
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mysticonsheadcanons · 2 years ago
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This is a gacha character I made based off of the principal from detentionaire, she's a reference and I name all my characters after what I reference them from, so her names Barrage (because the school principal on detentionaires called Principal Barrage), here's afew things about her:
#1: Barrage is 33 years old and works as a teacher/principal at her old highschool
#2: Due to her being in the army for 5 years she's been a no-nonsense person (atleast, 99% of the time)
#3: She has no kids but would have liked 1 or two, maybe even 3 at most
#4: She's half robot and doesn't like talking about why, she also doesn't like it when people ask her about her parents, she always just replies with "They're sleeping..." and without further convo, she leaves the area
#5: her Favorite activity besides exercising is watching action movies, more specifically about war
#6: She always acts like she doesn't have any emotions infront of her colleagues due to not wanting anyone to see her sad
#7: Barrage has the same nightmare most nights about a particular event that happened to her parents when she was only 3 years old
#8: Barrages favorite color's are black and purple
#9: she's the oldest one out of all of her co-workers
#10: Barrage is a fairly independent person, she also does not like to be disturbed when she's exercising or doing work
#11: She acts like a child some days but it's linked to a certain day of her past (she acts like a child sometimes because to her she feels like part of her mind never grew up, hence, why sometimes she might be seen playing like a kid does with toys)
#12: When Barrage has a hard time falling asleep she either takes a midnight walk, or goes to her attic room window and stares at the moon until she feels tired (she sometimes makes a wish that her parents were beside her too)
#13: her favorite subject in school was actually gym, as she believed it would help her become a soldier in the future
#14: She doesn't express her emotions to anyone, like, at all, she only does when she's alone because she thinks that by expressing herself, she's letting her guard down
#15: whenever A.Nigma high (still working on a better highschool name with nigma in it and one that's not the exact same as the detentionaire school) takes a field trip, Barrage likes to sit at the very back with her headphones in because she hates it when people always wonder what she's listening to, and because the bus is always slightly too loud for her on field trips
#16: Barrages favorite song to listen to is an old lullaby her parents sang to her all the time 30 years ago (the year her life starts in is 2185, her year of birth)
#17: She doesn't want anyone knowing her last name for "classified" reasons
#18: She has assassin quickness, and super-senses, for example, if she was sleeping, and it was so silent you couldn't hear a thing, and she was in the attic, she'd hear the lightest sounds coming from the basement
#19: her favorite place to visit is the lake her parents always took her to when she was little, she loves swimming in the lake even though it reminds her of her past
#20: even though she's never told anybody, she actually thinks of her colleagues as friends
#21: Barrage doesn't like total silence, but she lives alone, so she always puts on a song at random to drown out the silence because it always drives her insane
Proxima, Quasarla, and Naivara, heads up about the quiz I'm going to try and give you each a couple of the same questions! Also, the next thing I send in will be the quiz! Also, sorry there's so many facts, it's just that I had alot of fun writing this!
PROXIMA: I look forward to it.
QUASARLA: Alright.
NAIVARA: That's a lot of stuff to remember (Note: I'm fine with that amount of information. I just imagine her as someone who likes learning on her own terms, so she wouldn't be too thrilled at memorizing all this.)
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ennui-gt · 3 years ago
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Here it is. A Piece Of Borrower Content Written Entirely In Stream Of Consciousness:
AN: so this is incomplete and very…needs revisions to the timeline to incorporate some things I added later! It’s the original universe that Mira’s from! I edited it like Slightly to just change Ross’s name to Ross (if u see Max anywhere that’s his old one I just felt like changing it so that’s just him but different. Anyway) Everything's under the readmore tab, cheers!
The Library Fairy:
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Basic Plot (Chrono, comic starts from human perspective abt the ‘legend of the library fairy’ ig maybe. Nothing here is permanent cept the characterization)
Part A
1- Mira is borrower currently chillin in a college library
2- She lives off of the cafe on the second floor nd reads lots and lots of stuff about everything when the upper floors close (lower floor open 24/7 but upper floors r vacant p much after 12:00 AM)
3- she starts getting increasingly curious about human stuff cos she’s literate nd books r pry neat
4- it starts one night when she spots an unattended notebook and a half eaten blueberry muffin, nd it’s 12:30 so nobody’s coming back in atm (it’s the 80s so no laptops for the plebians quite yet)
5- so she goes ‘welp’ nd takes part of the muffin, then sees the work on the page and goes ‘hmmmm this is incorrect’ so she helps our and leaves notes here n there to point the kid in the right direction and puts down some book refs for further study bcos at this point she’s been there for 2 years and she knows where most things are
6- she stays behind to see if the human comes back for it, hidden in a hidey hole near the desk
7- human comes in, sees notebook, practically melts w relief nd stuffs it in his bag
8- next day human comes back nd leaves nother notebook and a cookie, along w a hidden camera
9- Mira goes ‘o boy, this a trap, innit’
10- Mira then decides ‘eh whatever I haven’t had contact w anyone in years now so I might as well’
11- she steals the camera film nd leaves a lil scrap of paper saying ‘nice try ;)’ on it
12- student comes back, sees paper, goes ‘dammit’, then leaves note addressed to the ‘library fairy’ and another cookie, as well as more of their work for her to help with
13- bout a decade goes by and now the “Library Fairy” is an urban myth, it’s currently 2003 so she’s also wound up on the school’s unofficial Wikipedia page under ‘local cryptids’
14- most library employees know of her but they don’t go looking out of fear stemming from superstitions bout her, somehow the legend grew from ‘can’t be photographed’ to ‘a student once saw her and died that day’
15- there’s now a small shrine devoted to her where ppl bring offerings hoping to get good grades in return, sometimes they will leave papers for her to proofread nd stuff
16- new prof (named Alexei) finds online article thinks he Knows What’s Up bcos he had a borrower friend as a kid, but they left when borrower’s fam found out about them knowing each other
17- he leaves note wedged in one of her secret entrances behind outlet, asking if she can meet w him at some point
18- Mira, already In it, goes ‘Okay. Alright. This has gone on for long enough. Time to go and never return’ but ofc she’s curious as all hell and like she decides she will at least honor the guy’s request for a convo b4 she goes, but on her terms and w/o speaking face 2 face
19- they Talk in the library after hours, bcos he paid off the janitor to let him stay after hours nd most of the student employees recognize him as a prof nd leave him alone
20- they talk again for every subsequent night
21- she uhhhh finally decides to reveal herself nd prays that her hunch was right nd he won’t try to grab her or anything
22- he doesn’t but she’s nervous so she winds up gettin caught in her own climbing rope like idiot, is now dangling from ceiling in tangled mess
23- he stifles chuckle nd she says smthn sarcastic
24- he moves closer and offers to untangle her
25- she’s like ‘please’
26- so he do, but her grip on the rope slips nd he has to catch her
26- so now she’s in his hand and he just sets her down and now he’s a bumbling embarrassed mess bcos he said he wasn’t going to hold her and he just did and o dear pls forgib him
28- nd she’s like ‘dude u just saved my life it’s fine ur fine chill’
29- internally she’s going HOLY FUCK AAAAAAA but externally, her human’s already worked up enough as it is so she’s gotta b the level headed one
29.5- after a while they both kinda get used to each other more, he gets tenure, they celebrate, some more stuff happens, Aleksei got married (not to Mira, Mira hasn’t actually rly thought about being in a relationship w anyone cos she’s laser focused on gaining as much knowledge as possible)
30- eventually Alexei’s like ‘hey so I’m dean of faculty for the biotech branch now uhhhh would u like actual job teaching students? Cos, uh, you can do it remotely thru online lectures n stuff, no in person interaction, and I uh was just kinda wondering—‘
31- she’s like ‘yes. Yes!!! LET ME HELP PEOPLE OFFICIALLY KINDA’
32- so now she’s a professor, and has revealed her Secret a few times here n there to a number of the faculty, nd she has recorded her own findings in a personal journal
33- ‘humans will treat u like a human if they think ur human first. The kids call it ‘catfishing’’
34- enter Ross, an mall goth who accidentally tripped headfirst into a premed program
35- Mira’s favorite field of study is bio so naturally she’s his prof for a majority of his classes
36- being the good boy that he is, he now knows Mira’s secret. There is an Entire Chapter on him finding out and legit just continuing their conversation as if everything was normal bcos he thought that was how he was supposed to handle the situation
37- then she says ‘u can ask questions, u know’ he’s like OH THANK FUCK CAUSE I HAVE SEVEN HUNDRED OF THOSE
38- and now he kinda knows what to look for in terms of ‘do borrowers live here check yes or no’
39-in his apartment, the answer is yes and he mistakenly kinda stumbles upon the mom one night when he wakes up in the middle of the night for Snack and opts to pretend like its not happening. Unfortunately the thing she was trying 2 borrow (piece of crumb cake for Son Boy’s birthday) is the thing he wants 2 eat so he’s like “uh. ‘Scuse me, ma’am.” and he peels back the saran wrap on the other side of the plate, takes piece, nd then leaves some there for her
40-so now the woman is like ‘welp guess it time 2 Leave’
.1- she and husband Talk
.2-they decide it best 2 go
.3-theyre Packing
.4-lil bab Ellie confused
.5-hawk attacke
.6-cut to Ross
41- Ross also happens to work at a bar and he goes outside for a break
43- he finds smal child—smol smal—on the sidewalk and said child is missing an arm, nd has lost a lot of blood, so he’s uhhhhh Losing It highkey
43.5-parents r nowhere 2 b seen, but the hawk is nearby and circling. Ross gets an idea of what just happened
44- he up and leaves work, thankfully his apartment is above the shop so he jumps up the fire escape w the child and
45- he make tourniquet
46- he calls Mira nd asks her 2 come over to ASAP. he’s A Mess at this point
47- it is Very touch and go, kid needs blood, Mira is the only viable donor so she’s just gotta pray that the blood type is fine and won’t kill him
48- and then eventually they manage 2 stave infection thru antibiotics properly dosed to his size, Mira does Math and Prays basically
49- ‘bout a month in, kid wakes up
50- kid doesn’t rember much since he’s only 3
51- hes v scared of Ross at first but over time he gets used 2 the human
52- kid (elliot) starts 2 call Ross ‘dad’ after a while
53- Ross: *internal screaming but in a good way*
54- the end kinda for now
Part 2
A- New Borrowers In The Building
—three of em. paranoid dad, mom, nd daughter that’s Elliot’s age so he’s pumped
B- Elliot offers them a place 2 stay briefly
C- he knows by now bout like, how borrowers don’t typically interact w humans and Auntie Mira’s a bit of a weird case so he just doesn’t tell em bout his dad being the human
D- the kid finds out first nd doesn’t tell the parents, but they figure it out later kinda and think that it’s a ‘o god he’s being kept as a pet’ sitch so they’re >:| abt it
E- they move out and try to take Elliot w them (by force bcos they think he’s brainwashed) but he escapes and makes it to Ross, who’s like “uhhhhhh”
F- and the mom come out the hole near the counter n starts yelling at Ross, who is…kinda used to it since Mira brings in ppl who need help from time 2 time and they typically don’t react well when they’re lucid enough to understand what’s going on. He’s just not used to being questioned about his own kid
G- so they’re like “WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING WITH HIM”
H- and he’s like “r…raising him???”
I- and Ellie steps up and he’s like “this is my dad. I decided he was my dad when I was three. He’s being a good parent”
J- and Ross is like “yeah what he said. I’m a good parent.”
K- Ross is riding that high til the end of fucking time but like back to the story at hand
L- this is when the husband comes out nd is like “lissen. wifey. ily but that is a very big human and he hasn’t grabbed us yet so let’s count our blessings and gtfo”
M- but she’s like “uh no we stay until I’m sure Elliot is Safe and fucking Sound”
N- so they stay for dinner nd stick around a little longer.
O- Val (the kid) gets closer 2 Elliot and also Ross a bit
P- Mira shows once or twice, first time she shows up they’re like “oh god it’s the crazy doctor lady this all makes sense now” (bcos Mira does check up on as many borrower families as possible in her free time so word has got around by now Of her, and the number by which to contact her in case her services r needed)
Q- After a month or so, then they decide to leave bcos they’re like “look we get that ur son is ur son and he only has one arm and in our profession that is kind of a death sentence but we can’t have our kid getting used to dealing w humans who know about our existence” so they go and leave on a kind of sour note bcos Ellie can do anything he wants to do just as well as any other borrower Thank You Very Much and Ross is ready to fite anyone who thinks otherwise
R- Elliot starts trying 2 b more independent, basically from now on he’s like ‘I can do everything my Damn Self Thanks’
S- but uh he does it to a point where he’s going out of the way to endanger himself
T- so they get into a fite about it and ross Yells and Elliot is like ‘kthxbye’
U- and the boi just. Fuckin bolts. Runs Away. Ross is a Mess, he starts smoking again (he quit cold turkey the day he took Elliot in) to curb the depression, he’s jus. Not doin good, worried that his son is dead and the last time they talked it’d ended badly
V- FREEDOM!!!1! Except Ellie doesn’t kno how to take care of himself so it’s a rough month or so and then he runs into some other borrowers livin in their own town in the wild ig, chillin, being hella independent, and he’s like “uh yes ofc I will join u, I was w my dad for a while but.........” he neither confirms nor denies that his dad’s dead but everyone kinda just assumes.
Part 3
W-anyway a year goes by and then the borrower group gets hit hard w some kind of sickness ig. Elliot gets it too he’s basically incapacitated n drifting in and out of lucidity. So. They contact the weird crazy doctor lady who hangs around humans, a.k.a. Mira, and she’s like “oh. fuck. I know this kid.” bcos she does, u kno, and she jus treats em all for their ailment and shows them how to make antibiotic poultice thing in case smthn like it happens again. Mold. Penicillin is basically what it is
X-she and Elliot hav a Chat (Mira basically yells at him a lot) once he’s fixed up and he decides he’s gonna visit his dad but he makes it very clear that he is a Grown Up (he’s not, he’s literally sixteen), and he is living on his own now
Y- he agrees to stay for a week tho since he misses his home a lot tbh and Ross is just. Over the fucking moon to know he’s ALIVE, he’s not gonna fuck up their relationship by insisting that he stay. Or like, by keeping him ofc he would never
Z- unfortunately the borrower community put two and two together and figured out his dad’s human so they have his stuff packed up when he gets back w mira, who’s ready to go the fuck off on them
End 1:
-Ellie is living at Ross’s place atm and hopeful about the future basically. He eventually will go off on his own but he’ll keep in contact w his dad and stuff
Part C.5
55- few yrs later
56- elliot is Adult now he does adult borrower stuff
57- he moves out
58- finds nice borrower gf (her name’s Tess)
59- doesn’t tell her about his dad being human but talks about his dad a LOT
60- so when she asks to meet said father he’s just like “uh. Maybe we don’t do that actually”
61- and she’s like “y tho”
62- and he’s like “bcos”
63- anyway she decides to look into it cos she knows he goes to see his dad nd keep in touch but his dad is allegedly “a recluse who lives in the big scary human’s walls to avoid other ppl”
64- which is. Not true in the slightest tbqh he’s def not an introvert he’s just a workaholic and he Is the big scary human
65- anywho they run into Val and her wife and she’s like “how’s Ross been?” And Elliot is acting Very Suspish so she, being Smart, calls it immediately and is like “oh shit u haven’t told her yet have u”
66- Tess: “told me what”
67- Val: “El’s dad is a human, bro.”
68- Tess: “I’m sorry?”
69- this results in a Big Fight and they separate for like, a month. Elliot blames Val bcos he’s being irrational and doesn’t wanna admit to the fact that lying to his girlfriend for over a year was Real Bad Actually, but over time he’s like ‘yeah it’s my fault sry for snapping at u’ cos he works thru his emotions n stuff
70- Eventually gf comes back cos she’s like “ok so. I understand why you lied to me about your dad. It was a dick move but I do get it and I still care about you a lot. I would like. To meet him.”
80- this is a lie she does not want to meet him she is doing this bcos she does not want to lose Elliot and that outweighs the fear of his dad
81- so they go to meet him but she’s just kinda. Behind the wall at first like “that’s a crazy big human this is crazy ur crazy it’s time to gO”
82- Val is also there bcos she hasn’t seen Ross in a while
83- they eventually coax her out of hiding
84- and by that I mean Val picks her up and drags her out into the open by force bcos she basically freezes up the second she catches sight of Ross and Val’s like “u didn’t come all this way for nothing, bich”
85- they have a Painfully Awkward First Meeting, Tess is trying her best but oh god he’s just too fucking. Larg. Ellie ur dad too big
86- tbh tho the ice kinda breaks after Ellie and Ross get into a fight over smthn stupid (im thinking Elliot grumbles bout Ross’s hair being unruly and he’s worried that mira’s using it like a personal storage system again and Ross is like “I’ve been keeping better track of that actually” and then like a little line of paper clips and a few hand-bound notebooks tied together w some string fall out of his fucking mane and he’s like “I can explain”
87- “dad you can’t keep letting her use your hair like a fucking NEST”
88- Tess is laughing now cos god damn this was not what she was expecting
89- that’s it the end it ends w Tess laughing at them being idiots good times r had by all
Uhhhh that’s it so far. I have More but it’s kinda jumbled rn and I need to fit stuff in places. Anyway.
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bisexual-maelstrom12 · 4 years ago
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Ranking the Lovelink Matches (a completely subjective list by moi)
22. Clementine Hill / Grace Kim
I already wasn’t into her because she’s a privileged rich girl who uses literary quotes to seem smart (but really it’s just obnoxious). But then she tells us she’s thinking about dumping us for her creepy old professor?? Girl needs an actual job so she can stop relying on her parents and a therapist for her daddy issues. 
21. Dominic Wright / Adam Johnson
I’m still pretty early on in the storyline here but so far I’m just bored. A “love” photography theme? Big yawn.
20. Liam Park / Min-Jae Lee
How Is Dating A K-Pop Star This BORING
19. Jake Gonzales / Zayn Kassab
The sexting is fun but honestly his film project sounds terrible and he needs to cool his feelings down like 200%. 
18. Angel Reed / Emmalyn Roberts
Look she’s amazing and gorgeous and the animals are ADORABLE but honestly I find her pretty boring compared to the other matches SORRY DON’T HATE ME
17. Antoine Dawson / Noah Cruz
He comes on too strong a lot but I dig the puppies and the sexual tension. I would absolutely enter a FWB relationship with him but nothing more. 
16. Albert Bishop / Jonathan Hayes
This ranking is subject to change bc tbh I swiped left on these boys at first (#fuckamericanimperialism). But then other matches finished up and I needed more content and y’know what? Albert’s pretty okay. I like his backstory so far and he’s sweet and sexy. Should def get out of the military tho. 
15. Stefan Silver / Oliver Black
I appreciate that he’s a more consent-friendly version of Christian Gray and I like the “defrosting ice king” trope. But I would much rather be using the riding crop on him than vice versa. >:)
14. Jamie Grant / Seth Evans
Jamie is kind of a weird match in that I LOVE his storyline but also the flirting is pretty weak?? Like, I literally would have had to pay gems for the first “date”. I’m not feeling much of a sexual connection here, but I’m all aboard the hacker kidnapping storyline. 
13. Austin Russo / Damien Jones
He’s rough around the edges but the character growth is pretty spectacular. Gotta save my boo from death row. 
12. Sam Knight / Michael Evans
Never thought I’d be into a jock frat boy but here we are. I like how I snarked at him constantly for a week and he still fell for me. Ghosting us after we call him out on his daddy issues is pretty weak tho. 
11. Samantha Clark / Aesha Nora
Okay she isn’t the greatest person or partner but cute gamer gf?? Yes please. And she can cook and bench press me too! *swoon* Also Fiction needs to be real asap. 
10. Sage Foster / Vitoria Voznesenky
Sage was one of my first matches and was my favorite for a while. Who doesn’t want a hot goth gf? But then she PUNCTURED MY LIP (does that even heal??) and almost ate me and I’m just not about that. Hopefully she can go give Baba Yaga a talking to and get that curse removed.
9. Skylar Quinn / Jaden Bower
So making us commit a crime and then ditching us on the first date wasn’t cool, and I’m not much for a “rebel without a cause,” but then Skylar hit me with his tragic backstory and, well, I’m weak y’all. Also he’s so smart and snarky and sexy and I want him to achieve his dreams.
8. Eve Rockwood / Alice Martin
Look I’m still pissed at Eve for ditching us in Ibiza. But also I would absolutely drop everything to follow a hot girl to Japan. 
7. William Crome / Julien Alexandre
I was never really into the whole dating a vampire thing but William just does it for me. I think it’s the hair and the old timey fashion. And he told off his mom for me, which is more than I can say about SOME of these matches.
6. Hugo Hornsby / Marco Bottazzi
Hugo is lowkey a garbage human who absolutely emotionally cheated on his long-term fiance with us. So why do I love him so much?? Idk, could be my trash taste in men, could be my love of geeks, could be the delicious drama of his plotline. Hugo pls come back from ur convo with ur fiance and d*ck us down already. 
5. Kayla Summers / Jasmin Medina
Kayla/Jasmin is objectively the most badass match in Lovelink. She’s hot, ambitious, and didn’t ghost me for a dumb reason. She can kill it in heels AND kill actual killers! Get you a girl who can do both!
4. Raphael Becker / Wyatt Moore
The creepy cult plot is fascinating and Raph is the perfect combination of sweet/romantic and hott. That dream date was amazing. Pls Lovelink, when will my husband* come back from the war**?
* musician boyfriend
** creepy cult village
3. Ryan Byrne
Ryan is lowkey my perfect guy--sweet, nerdy, and SO SEXY OMG. I need his sex scene so bad pls. Also he might have caused the zombie apocalypse and that’s very interesting of him. I’m hooked on his story and I want his **** hooked in my *****. 
2. Milena Sarafian / Ana Samarine (also maybe the same route as Ruby Thomas and Julia Greene?? Idk I’m pretty confused by this whole situation)
Apparently my ideal type is an adorable yet sexy computer who discovers love and how to be human through interacting with me. I should probably go watch that Her movie.
1. Cpt. Muffin
CAT. SHY BOY. <3.
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arjsstuff · 3 years ago
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Memories with Pkyek
My introduction to Pyaar Ki Ye Ek Kahani or PKYEK as we all called it started with the amazing introduction promos I watched several times on star one. I remember watching one of the trailers of PKYEK on star one when I was in 5th grade which is almost 11 years back. I was casually switching channels and I saw this ad, mysterious, the tone of the ad was pretty dark, a curly haired girl and a blue eyed guy and he saves her from getting hit by a car. It was strangely so beautiful and the words “math aao mere kareeb, aag hu main jal jaogi” was clearly stuck in my head and this was a promo a week before the serial released.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JM1Cq62uJcY
I think the serial was scheduled to air from 18th October 2010 which was 2 days before my birthday and although I decided I have to watch this I could not watch it for some reason and I forgot about this serial. One day in class my bench mate and then close friend started talking to me about this serial and I immediately told her how much I loved the promo and she asked me to watch the episodes at 8:30 and if I missed it she also told me the re-broadcast timings which was sometime in the evening. I was like yeah sure since she strongly recommended it to me I would definitely watch it. So I was almost 7-8 episodes late and the first episode I watched was Abhay-Piya's first dance and the first scene I watched was Haseena telling Abhay to control himself on their party night near a small bridge kind of place and then the dance followed. 
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OMG I must tell how it was one of the best dances I had ever seen on TV serial, it was so magical, especially the way they both were so lost in each other’s eyes and he ensured her torn dress wasn’t visible to anyone and also they danced on to kuch khaas hai song which was such a great song and it ended with the signature Mahiyaa tune. It instantly got me hooked to and I watched it religiously every day. My mom did not want me to watch teen romance Hindi TV serial so I literally had to change channels to Hungama every time she came to the hall XD. Since PKYEK was such a phenomena at school I made so many friends and the best part about pkyek is wherever I went after school for example junior college, Uni, my cousins friends etc all became my friends because of how we all watched pkyek LOL. 
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Anyway so I got my really studious friend Z into watching it and she was this person who never watched TV but once she say Abhay she was hopelessly in love with that guy. I cringe when I think we all went through this in 5th grade, I mean how were we all swooning over him like proper teenagers. Anyway one day she went to the library and found his picture on some magazine and she told me and I literally ran to the library to get a hold of it but there were so many people already holding it and finally I got a glimpse of Abhay Raichand’s photo and a short interview by Vivian D'sena. I think she started getting so addicted to pkyek that her mom did not like it and she sometimes called me n my landline to talk about it lol. One day there was this class in school where we weren’t supposed to talk so her and I wrote whatever we had to talk on my notebook along with my friend D and the full chat was about Z, D and me swooning over Abhay, while letting A have Abhay and us mostly us teasing her with him. The chats were extremely funny so I tore them from my book and gave it to my senior in my school bus to read it, and when her stop came, before she got down she handed over the papers to me. I think my bad luck was super great that day and my bus teacher, who was this very this strict language teacher who 7-8th grade students caught her passing the papers onto me and asked me to hand it over to her. I immediately put them into my bag and tried tearing them into pieces while she kept screaming to hand it over to her. In the end I had to hand over one part of the chat which was quite dangerous considering we were only 5th graders going crazy about an actor and talking like late teens but I managed to save the dangerous part in my bag. This ***** ma’am read it and literally told me that she would hand it over to my school’s head teacher and she did that the very next day. Why can’t teachers get a life? 
Anyway the next day I came to class and told everyone about this and my extra sweet friends told me not to worry about it. In between an afternoon class, the peon came and called Z first, we thought maybe she got called for some extra circular activity, but when the peon came again and called me I knew I was dead. I went into the head teacher's room and she had almost got screwed and I was next in line and I somehow told even D was a part of this convo and even she got called. The other girls in my class were actually worried cuz they knew what was happening. And later head teacher screwed all of us and I guess Z cried on her way to class and then the head teacher let me and D go to class but we were so shameless, after getting a earful we could not stop laughing and literally lmaoed in the corridor before entering the class. This whole thing kind of strained my friendship with Z, and we weren’t the best of friends anymore but D and I still stuck close.
My school had this weird system where there was a girls and boys corridor and the girl’s corridor was pretty cool since it was on the left side and was closer to the trees while the right corridor used by guys was where the teachers entered the class from. So in these corridors we always role played and for some reason I was always Abhay even though I wanted to be Piya (I’m guessing it was because Of my short hair and being an serious faced person generally) and a lot of my friends were Piya and this friend of mine who was crazy about guys was called tracker and my friend D was Misha and we used to randomly dance to songs and recall the dialogues from the previous episodes, do the remoe juliet skit from pkyek and all sorts of things.
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The background music on Pkyek is seriously so legendary and is among one of my favourite bgm tracks for a hindi serial. I would personally rate it number one and it had been my ringtone for 3 years. I tried looking for the Mahiyaa singer and the official song but I could not find it anywhere and mostly found only the recorded copies played in the serial. In my school bus I had seniors who I was very very close to because of pkyek and we always sung the background music, it’s so funny how we knew all the background music from pkyek by heart and remembered it perfectly and were in sync. I started singing this usually in my class as well and my friends hummed along.
Times of India and this other newspaper which I can’t recall had this section where TV channel broadcast programs were listed every day and this tiny picture from random TV shows was displayed on top of it. Whenever there was a pkyek picture all our friends used to literally fight over a picture that was probably 1*1 cms, very very tiny and even the quality wasn’t great but if you opened my pencil pouch on any random day you would find at least 10-15 of them LOL (I’ve lost all of them now).
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found this from https://thereandtheir.wordpress.com/tag/indian-tv-serial/ the tv listing was similar but it was a bit different
I already mentioned how strict my mom was back then so I had to watch the re broadcast since I couldn’t watch the episodes fully at 8:30 PM. I had to wake up around midnight or early morning to watch it. I remember my parent’s thinking I sleep walked because my parents found me in hall instead of my room on odd mornings. It was quite the life with the box TV since I had to sit so close to it and the volume had to be on 1 or 2 since I could not wakeup people at home while watching it. One of the benefits of waking up early to watch this was also that I could see the newest promos on TV and I was always the first one in class to tell what the new promos were about. I remember telling my friends some of the coolest Pkyek promos like the vampire reveal one which in my opinion is still the best promo for a Hindi TV serial (I think Parvati introduction promo for Mahadev on Lifeok is a close second) and the promo where Abhay bites her and many more. I remember revealing this to my friends and my friends rushing home and switching on star one and waiting for the promos to appear and calling me to tell how amazing those promo were.
I remember how this one time I went to my senior A's house and we created fake Ouija board to call spirits. So we called her dead grandmother's spirit and she asked if the creepy guy in her class who was obsessed with her would stop annoying her and I immediately remembered the pkyek scene where Panchi asks maithli on the Ouija board if Danish would ever get punished. I don't know who's idea it was to play with it but it certainly had to do something with pkyek.
Those were really the fun times of my life. Pkyek is and will always be the most memorable serial for me. It’s not like we can expect great cg and VFX for a vampire serial and it in no way could be another vampire dairy or twilight (not to forget EK produced it) but the story and the writing was really amazing. I was a huge sucker for Abhay-Piyas chemistry and the supporting cast were literally the best!
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punkscowardschampions · 3 years ago
Text
China & Bobby
China: Hey, have you heard
Bobby: ?
China: Your girlfriend is setting up private rehearsals with that kid Louie
Bobby: I know they’re running lines together, yeah, and you know she’s not my girlfriend
China: If that’s what you want to believe
China: that’s not what my sister reckons it is
China: or Jake, actually
Bobby: 👌 Well, I’ll believe what’s actually coming from Libi
China: 😂
China: Have fun waiting for that
China: hardly going to tell you, is she
China: I’m just warning you, so you don’t look like a total cuck
Bobby: what’s funny is 1. the idea you’re looking out for me and 2. that I’d need that when it’s Libs we’re talking about 😂
China: Yeah he said she was probably frigid
Bobby: I’m SO glad I can’t usually understand what either of you are saying
China: Ignorance is bliss
Bobby: when you’re talking that much nasty bollocks it is
China: Um, it’s her you’re actually mad at, not me
Bobby: No, it’s you I’m fed up of
China: I’ve done literally nothing to you
Bobby: You’re a bit busy with Libi as a target for now
China: How am I?
Bobby: You’re only talking to me to try and stir up trouble and make her look and me feel bad
China: Oh, because I’M the rude one here 👌👌
Bobby: Yeah, unless you wanna say sorry and start over
China: I don’t owe anyone an apology
Bobby: Alright, I’ll see you in rehearsal then
China: You mean the actual rehearsals we all go to, or the cliquey one your girlfriend organized?
Bobby: Depends if you’re gonna turn up there without an invite
China: I wouldn’t come even if she wasn’t excluding half the cast
Bobby: so it’ll be left to Ms Howe to referee, lucky her
China: She literally started it, if it’s annoying you, you should bring it up with her
Bobby: I just said, you’re the one annoying me
Bobby: whatever massive scandal you reckon is going on must’ve passed me by
China: *you wanna pretend it isn’t happening
China: whatever, that’s on you
Bobby: I don’t know what you’re talking about, that’s real
China: Jesus, get with it
China: thought you weren’t meant to be slow
Bobby: She wants to do a good job, so would you if the lead had been given to you
Bobby: the rehearsals with Louie are just that and we’re having our own without you and your mates ‘cause you say stuff like that and think it’s okay, you have done since we were kids, don’t start pretending you don’t get why when it’s not a new thing
China: I didn’t say you were slow, I said you were acting it
China: you use it as a get out of jail free card for everything, if you’re looking to be offended, then you will be 🤷‍♀️
Bobby: I have stuff to do that’s not this
China: So?
China: Go do it
China: Being salty with me isn’t going to change anything
Bobby: don’t worry, I wasn’t relying on you to change Mullan’s mind about the casting or anything
China: Yeah, I’m blatantly not the only one who didn’t get the role they wanted
Bobby: That much we could’ve agreed on, except it’s too weird
China: I didn’t actually think that whole deaf plot was a terrible idea
China: neither of you deserved leads, but if he’d made her the maid or something, it could’ve been a subplot
Bobby: She did deserve the lead, sir got that bit right at least
China: 🙄
China: her and Jake look ridiculous together
Bobby: Yeah, that’s why they need extra rehearsals together too or the whole play is gonna fall apart
China: Well she hasn’t asked him, that’s my point
China: She clearly fancies that kid, God knows why
Bobby: No she don’t
China: How would you know? 😂
China: She’s giving him favourable preference
China: or maybe she thinks it’ll make Jake jealous, tragic
Bobby: We’re best mates, there’s nothing she wouldn’t or don’t talk to me about, but even if she didn’t wanna, I could tell ‘cause I know her inside out
Bobby: she’s not into Louie or Jake
China: When you were both children maybe
China: boys and girls can’t be friends like that after the age of whatever the fuck she is
China: 10, 11
Bobby: How did you work that out?
China: I’m not giving you a biology lesson we all had 5 years ago
Bobby: She’s not my only mate who’s a girl, I’d have to fancy them all, are you gonna go into the subject of polyamory or something like Miss never did?
China: That’s why I said mates like that
China: There’s a difference between BFFs and a girl you hang out with on occasion, duh
Bobby: whatever, it’s not true anyway
China: If you’re this upset, you should really say something
Bobby: I’m not that bothered that Mr Mullan can’t recognise a decent idea when it’s handed to him, I still get to be in the play
China: Yeah, so what I meant
Bobby: You’re the last person I’d tell anything personal to, not THAT slow
China: It’s pretty obvious
China: everyone knows
Bobby: *thinks they do
Bobby: but it’s alright there’s loads worse they could be saying than I’m going out with Libi or want to, least they reckon I’ve got good taste
China: You’re sickening, truly
China: don’t tell me all about your 😍s when she’s the one that don’t give a fuck
Bobby: You’re the one going on about it
China: You bang on about each other constantly, it’s gross
Bobby: yeah well
Bobby: I’m not gonna say or be sorry, especially not to you
China: Do something about it or shut up
China: before everyone else gets as tired of it as we are
Bobby: We’re not kids doing the nativity now, you can’t push me about or get mardy and automatically get your way
China: Ugh, I’m giving you advice to help you
China: fuck knows why
China: you lose all your mates then, girls or otherwise
Bobby: There’s no need
Bobby: but tah, the offer’s decent of you
China: Don’t take the piss
Bobby: I’m not, it’s a headfuck but cool of you to try and help me sort what you think is going on
China: Don’t be a freak about it
Bobby: 👍
China: I’m sick of her bullshit, you were the only other person who might’ve been too
China: but of course not
Bobby: I can only agree with you that Mullan is a dickhead, she hasn’t done anything to me
China: Perhaps not yet
China: I disagree
Bobby: ‘Course you do, whatever makes her the bad guy
China: I can just see what you don’t want to already
China: She’s all over both of them
Bobby: My 👀 are fine
Bobby: they’re both being full on with her but it’s not like she’s encouraging either of them
Bobby: she’s just 😳
China: Of course, she’s totally innocent
China: get real
Bobby: You and I both know she don’t look at Jake with 😍 and all she’s ever said about Louie is he’s alright, totally uninterested is what I’m saying
Bobby: maybe they’ll become mates after spending loads of time together, that’s up to her, she’ll know him better than I do by then, but there’s no real 💘
China: and maybe they’ll get together
China: it’s just as possible and you’d be able to admit that if you weren’t so butthurt about it
Bobby: What are you gonna try next, opposites attract? This is stupid
China: I’m not trying anything
China: Plus I hardly think bland v bland is opposites
China: Jake is ‘opposite’ I guess
Bobby: Calling him bland has helped a 🤏 putting aside you also said she was
China: I knew you were jealous 😏
Bobby: That I don’t get to spend as much time with her when that’s what I signed up for and we already don’t have lessons together, yeah
Bobby: I never said different
China: I don’t miss my friends when I can’t see them for a few hours a day
Bobby: I get why you don’t, loads of them haven’t been great recently
Bobby: and you’ve got more than me, it’s not gonna be as deep
China: You don’t get it, you don’t know anything about me or my friends
Bobby: as much as you know about me and mine
China: except one of your friends is my sister and the other is her little boyfriend, so nah, actually
Bobby: Which is how I know what’s going on, how else, I can’t hear the gossip just going around, can I?
China: And you believe my sister, the infamous liar?
China: that’s solely a you problem, not a me
Bobby: I also believe what I saw when he busted up your party we were at, but okay, no heart to heart happening
China: Yeah, no
China: my ma has a shit boyfriend rn, so what
China: you should really be having that heart to heart with your girlfriend about her mess of a family
Bobby: Her nan isn’t very likely to get a shit boyfriend anytime soon, she’s alright
China: Oh, you mean her great grandma, that she lives with
China: because her teen parents died
China: yeah no she’s probably grand
Bobby: She’s got loads of people around her making sure she is
China: Won’t be long before they peg it
China: who then, her incest loving auntie, perhaps?
China: I guess her actual grandma, who’s younger than my mum, cool, cool
Bobby: Feel better yet?
China: Like I said, worry about her
Bobby: there’s no need, I said, and nothing lost in translation when we’re both on our phones
China: yeah right
Bobby: You don’t want much do you? Tell I love her and slag off her family in the same chat
China: I’m not asking you to do anything, I’m pointing out the obvious
Bobby: 😂👌
China: Fuck off laughing at me, state of you two
Bobby: I’m laughing at what you’re bothering to point out
China: Well I don’t see how you’ve got any room to laugh when it’s about you and your bestie
Bobby: ‘Cause it’s stupid and you’re way off
China: 😂👌
Bobby: I dunno how you’ve got any room to tell me how I should react to such a weird convo
China: It’s not weird, you’re weird
China: if you reacted appropriately it’d be fine
Bobby: maybe it’s just ‘cause it’s you
China: what’s that meant to mean?
Bobby: I could count on one hand the amount of times you’ve spoke to me since I moved here and every word’s been rude
China: You’re too sensitive, still
Bobby: Piss off, you know it’s not on
China: So cry about it
China: you’re calling me rude, don’t see me moaning
Bobby: I could’ve called you loads worse but then I’d be as bad
China: Heaven forbid
China: 😇 wouldn’t love you then
Bobby: Not being a massive dickhead is a choice I’m pretty happy with for everyone who has to put up with me and not something I’d want even if Libs and I had never met
China: You want a round of applause?
China: you’re both so righteous, it’s ridiculous
Bobby: Only if you sign it
China: Ha ha
Bobby: I know you know it from assembly
China: If you see me hitting one hand into the other, you know what that means
China: why would you need a sign, you just want special attention
Bobby: Why does French have le and la? I didn’t invent the language
China: It’s not a real language
Bobby: Bit awkward for all the people who use it
China: If you wanna be a snowflake about it
China: Language is about more than just functionality, that’s all sign language is
Bobby: I wanted a way to communicate when I was too young to write, I don’t see how that makes me a ❄️
China: And that’s nice for you and your family
China: there’s no reason I need to know it, it serves no purpose to me, and loads of people who will never need to talk to someone like you
Bobby: Nobody’s forcing you, school doesn’t even offer it to people who want to
China: Then what’s your point?
Bobby: I’m just answering you
China: I don’t want to talk to you
China: this has a point, pointless as it has ended up being
Bobby: Alright
China: Enjoy then
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minimoll7 · 6 years ago
Note
do all that ask stuff bonch ;)
1: Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?I’ve never smoked once in my life and I never will
2: Are you single/taken/heartbroken/confused?Single (tho lets be real here, I’m always confused. I never know what’s going on)
3: What if I told you that you were pretty?I’d probably be really flattered fhdugf
I answered questions 4-6 in my last post lol
7: Do you want to be single?Nah. I’d love to get a boyfriend someday and get married
8: Did you go out or stay in last night?*Hacker voice* I’m always in
9: How late did you stay up last night?I think I feel asleep at midnight?? Idk I just sort of fell asleep out of no where lol
10: Can you recall the last time you realized you liked someone a lot?I was in 8th grade, so like 2011 lol
11: Last three things you had to drink?Water, water and some water
12: Have you pretended to like someone?Unfortunately. Dumbest and most stupidest decisions I’ve ever made. I know I did it because I didn’t want to make someone feel bad but it was still a dumb decision in the end of it
13: Have you ever told somebody you loved them and not actually meant it?I’m assuming this means love in general, not like specifically romantic love because yes. I’ve said it to my dad like over a decade ago when I never meant it at all
14: Honestly, has anyone seen you in your underwear in the past 3 months?No lol well, I’ve seen myself but I don’t think that counts fgydsgfd
15: Is it hard for you to get over someone?Yeah, I have a hard time letting go
16: Think back five months ago, were you single?Bitch I’ve always been single fhydsgf
17: What were you doing at 12:30 this afternoon?Its like 12:29 right now fhydgsdf I’m answering questions ;)
18: Hold hands with anyone this week?No but I wanna
19: Could you go for the rest of your life without drinking alcohol?Never had alcohol, never will
20: What would you name your future daughter?Idk Robin maybe?? I love that name
21: Do you miss anyone?A lot of people :(
22: Have you kissed three or more people in one night?Haha bold of you to assume I kiss people
23: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed?BOLD OF YOU TO ASSUME I KISS PEOPLE
24: Are you good at hiding your feelings?Depends on the situation and what I’m hiding. In some cases I can in others I can’t to save my life lol
25: Have you ever cried from being so mad?I cry easily from emotions so yeah I have. Most of the time tho its something related to my dad
26: Who did you last see in person?My parents ha
27: Are you listening to music right now?I sure heckin am my dudes!! Listening to the Hyrule Temple theme from Smash Melee
28: What is something you currently want right now?A break from stress lol also pizza
29: What is the last thing you said out lot?I’m assuming lot is supposed to be loud lol “Sorry that you can’t handle the truth” that or “puppy!” can’t remember which happened first fhydsgdf
30: How is your heart lately?Fine I think? Not a 100% sure what this is specifically asking for lol
31: Do you wear the hood on your hoodie?Only if I really need it
32: Are you wearing socks?Nah my feet are naked af
33: What do people call you?They call me the Great Apocalypse
34: Will you talk to the person you like tonight?Considering I don’t like anyone romantically, no. But I do like my friends platonically, so yeah I will ;)
35: Are there any stressful situations in your life?M a n y so many my dudes
36: Who did you last share a bed with?Myself ;) I’m crazy I know
37: Did you do something bad today?I ate junk food
38: When was the last time a member of the opposite sex hugged you?That’s a good question, bold of you to assume I have a brain to remember stuff with
39: Do you get stressed out easily?Heckin yeah. I get stressed out so easily its ridiculous lol
40: Will you sing today?WILL I??? The world may never know!!
41: Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but didn’t?Oof yeah all the time. Most of the time its simple stuff but I get anxiety or embarrassed so then I keep quiet. Sometimes the convo changes direction completely and its no longer relevant or important enough to bring up
42: Who do you go to when you need to talk to someone?I go to like, most of my friends. There isn’t really just one person because I try to make sure I give my friends breaks from venting/negativity if I notice I go to them to frequently
43: Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance?Nope!!
44: What are you listening to right now?The Title theme from Night in the Woods. I love it so much, its such a cool theme
45: What is wrong with you right now?Do you want a list. I can give you a list
46: What is on your wrists right now?My skin, maybe some hair who knows
47: Where did you get the shirt/sweatshirt you’re weaW e a. My momma got my Zelda shirt from RedBubble lol
48: What do you like better: hot chocolate or hot apple cider?Hot chocolate I like it h o t
49: Do you make wishes at 11:11?Nah, I don’t believe in wishes lol
50: Are you a good artist?Sure am!! Someday I’ll get really heckin good to!!!
51: Love really is a beautiful thing huh?It certainly can be, yeah!
52: Do you miss the way things were six months ago?Not really lol not much changed, still hella stressed
53: Ever been on a golf cart?I don’t think so :0c
54: Do you have trust issues?Not usually lol
55: Ever stayed up all night on the phone, with who?I could never do that. I mean, I can stay up all night, my insomnia lets me do that no problem. But I’d get to tired, exhausted and really irritated if I was on the phone with someone the whole time
56: Do you own something from Hot Topic?I think one of my Zelda shirts is from Hot Topic. But I got it YEARS ago so I’m not sure
57: Do you use chap stick?Sadly I do lol
58: Have you ever slapped someone in the face?In a gentle, joking way, yes I have
59: Do you have a little sister?I am the little sister fdydfsgfg
60: Have you ever been to New York?Briefly, just on my way to Pennsylvania and then back on my way home. But I was a little kid so I don’t remember much
61: Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?Of course! :D
62: Have you hugged someone within the last week?Yeah I hugged my momma!
63: What were you doing at midnight last night?Pissing and then falling asleep
64: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?BOLD. OF. YOU. TO. ASSUME. I. KISS. PEOPLE. fhydsgdfgfdsgf
65: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?I have a few actually, but yeah!! :D You’re one of them, Zanky ;)
66: Were your last three kisses from the same person?Do I need to shoot your knees
67: Have you kissed anyone in the last five days?I’m going to shoot your knees
68: Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?I’m used to sleeping alone so I think I prefer it. But having people sleep even in just the same room with me does bring me comfort
69: Will next Friday be a good one?I think so, it should be
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beepbeepbeepeedee · 2 years ago
Text
Open Letter 1
Entry 6/10/22
I told A last night that i needed a friend hiatus. Idk i just feel like he failed me in a way which is so weird bc rationally i know he didn’t owe me everything i expected but, idk.
I feel just hurt and disrespected. Nearly every sexual encounter i’ve ever had has been traumatic. And this just makes me feel used and weird. Especially with what marina said about me. It really hurt
And he apologizes all the time and then shows up with a gift and i’m just supposed to be so okay all the time. I’m not okay. It hurts and idk how much of myself i have left to give. And i keep hoping and praying he’ll change but it’s the same conversation.
Like yesterday when i went to his place to talk about all that had happened, it just felt like the same convo we had all spring. “I’m sorry” “i’m going to prove that i can change” and idk it showed me nothing. I don’t believe that he’s sorry. And i want to so bad, i want nothing more than to just ignore that i’m feeling like this and ignore everything he’s ever said or done to hurt me and just be best friends again. But it hurts too much
It’s like a daily panic attack. My chest just feels full of pudding and glue and it’s hard to breathe. And he’s the one pouring it in and i’m like “yeah this is fine ! this is cool.” when it’s not. Idk it hurts so so much. Especially since i KNEW it like felt it in my gut and he made me feel paranoid and crazy. I hate being gaslit and it hurts. He promised he’d never hurt me again. Even when we started being friends again. And he ended up making me hate myself and adding to the sadness and self hatred i was feeling for most of 2022. And i HATE that he has this power over me. I hate that i did his dishes even YESTERDAY, i hate how when i told him i needed space i still tried comforting him. I hate how he makes me cry and feel like a fucking idiot.
Is something wrong with me ? it has to be a huge flaw beyond my mental illnesses because he dated her. He even fucked her when i was literally emotionally deconstructing. And he says i’m important to him, which idk if it’s bullshit or not. It has to be how i look idk. Maybe he doesnt like black people in that way ? idk. He’s the only person i’ve ever loved like actually. Not talking about obsession or infatuation. Like the actual thing. And each and every time i let myself do that, it goes out of control and he hurts me over and over.
We set a date but idk if i even want to be friends with him anymore, at least not until i stop loving him. but idk. No one has ever hurt me like this except for my parents. Why am i letting him do this. I swear i think i’m stupid. I have to be. I want him to fix it but not for my sake, for his. I want him to WANT to be in my life and show it. He says he does but lets me down every time. Idk how much more i can take. I’m feeling a lot rn imma go shower
6/11/22 1:52am
I was followed and called him. I feel so stupid. I shouldnt have but he’s my safe place. After all that i’ve felt from his actions i still feel safe with him and it makes me so mad. I’m so stupid. I hate how i’ve felt as a result of his actions. I dont feel like a person i feel like a pawn sometimes. Like he knows i’ll always come back somehow and always forgive him. Am i stupid ? and idk he asked me for soemething just now. It’s not bad but idk it rings to what my friendships are like sometimes, which are contractual. But in a painful way. We were fine. And then he’d hurt me and then repay me with a gift and i felt like "well i gotta forgive him, he gave me this thing"
I can’t love him more than i love myself. And it just feels so so fucking weird, bc i’ve never not loved him ? i mean of course at first it was platonic for like years but i always was like “this is a person i love and i want to protect that” and we can never be nice to each other at the same time it hurts idk. Like is it me? Am i incapable of being kind and showing love ? or do i just choose the wrong people to love ? why do i always choose my parents ? anthony is like a mix of my mom and my dad where like i love him but i’m so afraid of him. Like in bo burnham’s song Can’t Handle This he literally says “Part of me loves you/Part of me hates you/Part of me needs you/Part of me fears you” i’m so afraid of what you make me feel and what i experience when i’m with you but it’s so surreal. 
God i started crying while taking to you bc i started panicking. I can’t imagine my life without you in it somehow. Idk. i cant stop caring and i want to so bad got i hate you so much sometimes you make me feel so much pain and hate myself like in the self hate tree youre a hearty branch and i keep trying to cut it but it keeps growing back
Youre part of the reason i wanted to leave NY like idk i just feel like i would finally get loose of the grip you have on me and idk if i can even be angry bc idk if it’s on purpose but i’ve been abused so many times idk maybe i should be mad. Maybe it it purposeful god i dont know anything anymore and idk i felt like you wouldnt hurt me or take me for granted bc we were friends and i just got out of an abusive relationship, which followed an emotionally abusive relationship, and you basically proved to me why i don’t trust anyone and i just don’t know how to feel okay again. I feel like i can never trust anyone’s intentions again. You really fucking hurt me. And it’s not even the first time. And in october you said i need to trust you more and rely on that. And that has gotten me nowhere but crying into my keyboard and wishing you would care when i dont think you ever will. Maybe for a couple weeks but you’ll move on bc it’s not your problem and i’ll just cry and deal with all of that pain and idk. I hate you why do you keep doing this. It’s my fault. I basically keep making you be close to me it’s on me. You do need to be nicer to people idk.
I also just checked my email (friday night/saturday morning 3am 6/11/22), and i made it to the 3rd round of interviews for another company and i ran to IG and FUCK it hurts how much you’re still the person i wanna tell all my news to, good or bad. Idk i feel like our friendship has always been weird bc i’ve always loved you fuck i hate myself so much but its not my fault and it’s not yours. It’s idk fuck i just wanna not feel like this im so fucking hurt i can barely see through my tears rn
Idk man
0 notes
shtcablogs · 6 years ago
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All The Times I Lost My Sh*t While Watching ‘thank u, next’
Our Heavenly Father Ariana Grande has blessed us mortals with first musical and now visual perfection via ‘thank u, next’. If you haven’t seen the music video yet, then what the hell are you doing reading my blog? Go watch something that’s actually worth your time. 
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If you lived in a bunker Kimmy Schmidt style for all of the early 2000s, I’ll quickly break down the parodies in this video for you. We start with “Mean Girls” - the gossip montage, the Plastics, and the winter talent show scene - more on that later. Then we hit “Bring It On” - the flirty toothbrush scene and the Toros cheerleaders. Then we’ve got “13 Going on 30″ - the part where Jennifer Garner crashes her childhood best friend’s wedding and cries into her old dollhouse. Lastly, my personal favorite of the bunch, “Legally Blonde”. Ari pulls up with Bruiser, gets her nails done, sunbathes on the lawn, etc. The entire video is a mash-up recreating scenes from those four movies. Now what you came here for, the 20 moments from the TUN video where I straight up lost my shit, chronologically. Here we go.
1. AARON SAMUELS
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You give us Aaron Samuels within the first 20 seconds? Right then and there I knew this music video would change my life. I hope Ari tapped that.
2. WIDE SET VAGINA GIRL
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You know this chick from “Mean Girls”, or you at least know her famous quotes from the film.  “I saw Cady Heron wearing army pants and flip flops. So I bought army pants and flip flops.” “I can’t help it if I’ve got a heavy flow and a wide set vagina.” This girl isn’t even named in the movie but her quotes are still relevant 15 years later.
3. MEAN GIRLS FONT
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Damn this font gets me hype. What a f*cking mash-up.
4. THE BURN BOOK
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Literally all I want to do on a Friday night is scrapbook with Ariana Grande about our ex-boyfriends. Her burn book would be a lot thicker and more attractive than mine, but that’s another story.
5. SEAN’S PAGE
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Hello, this is the shit I live for. This is Big Sean’s page, Ariana’s first real famous boyfriend. It reads “Sean [heart] / so cute / so sweet / (could still get it)”. COULD STILL GET IT!!! OKAY ARI!!!!! But yeah I don’t blame you, he could get it from me, too. 
6. “SRY I DIPPED”
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We’re now onto Pete Davidson’s page. On the top, Ari writes “sry I dipped”. SORRY I DIPPED. I noticed this blurb the very first time I watched the video with my friend Lardia. “HOLY SHIT DID YOU SEE WHAT SHE WROTE ON PETE’S PAGE? REWIND IT!” and then we laughed for a solid minute. Such a savage and nonchalant thing to say. You were engaged to this dude, for crying out loud. I love it.
7. HUUUUGE
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Also on Pete’s page, “HUUUUGE” with four U’s. She broke the dude’s heart, but I think this kind of makes up for it. She just informed the entire world that her ex is packing major heat. Good for you, Pete Davidson. Cash in on this attention.
8. KAREN CHECKING THE WEATHER
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“It’s like I have ESPN or something. My breasts can always tell when it’s going to rain.” 
9. THE JINGLE BELL ROCK
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Definitely one of the most memorable scenes from “Mean Girls”, the winter talent show where the Plastics dance to “Jingle Bell Rock”. I love twerking to Christmas music.
10. YOU’RE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE
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I’M NOT CRYING, YOU’RE CRYING. I screamed so loud when I first saw this that I woke my neighbor’s baby. Having Kris Jenner parody Amy Poehler’s role of Regina’s mom in “Mean Girls” is the most genius idea of the 21st century. Kris is often compared to Regina’s mom, mostly for an early episode of KUWTK where Kim poses for Playboy and Kris films her from the sidelines with a camera phone. And that’s where “You’re doing amazing, sweetie” was born. 
11. I’M A COOL MOM
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This KJ dancing GIF is everything to me. The hoop earrings, velour tracksuit, old school camcorder, it’s a f*cking look and she pulls it off like no other. My only dream in life is to become famous enough that Kris Jenner will agree to make a cameo in one of my projects. And then we become best friends and spend our days drinking dry martinis and handling crises. She then decides that the family has gotten too large for her to manage alone. We become business partners. I manage all of the grandkids. I constantly pit them against one another so they’ll work harder and maintain that competitive edge. They call me Aunt CA. Kris becomes older and starts forgetting things like how to work the ice machine and the names of Kim’s ex-husbands. She doesn’t trust anyone but me to take care of her, so I move in. I legally change my last name to Kardashian. Kris passes at the age of 96. I grieve for months but finally find the strength to go on. Business must resume, that’s what Kris would want. I continue her legacy and the grandkids become even more famous than their parents. The Kardashians/Jenners/Disicks/Wests/Thompsons/Websters/whoever the fuck else they decide to have kids with are a multi-generational dynasty thanks to Kris and her apprentice, me. I wear a “What Would Kris Jenner Do” gold diamond bracelet and look at it every day and think fondly of the great times we had together. She may be gone, but she will never be forgotten. 
Jesus Christ. Talk about a rabbit hole. Back to the music video.
12. THE TOROS
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“I’m sexy, I’m cute. I’m popular to boot! I’m bitchin’, great hair. The boys all love to stare!” Classic film. Extra points for the pregnant cheerleader. That shit’s hilarious. Also I’ve never seen anything cuter than tiny ass Ariana Grande in a cheer uniform.
13. SUNBATHING AT HARVARD
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ICONIC. Legally Blonde is one of my all time favorite movies, mainly for Elle’s wardrobe and hilarious antics like laying out/studying in the middle of campus and going to buy a Macbook wearing a bunny costume. This is definitely one of the best shots in the music video. 
14. PAULETTE
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HOLY SHIT IT’S THE REAL PAULETTE. Jennifer Coolidge is freaking hilarious and masterfully played one of the funniest characters of all time IMO. The mid-music video convo with Ari and Paulette in the nail salon had me rolling. “Well, I’ve only gone out with one guy that had a big front tooth, and I liked it cause he never got anything stuck in the front teeth. Have you ever gone out with someone that had no teeth at all?” So silly but in the best way. 
15. THE DOLLHOUSE
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Ah, the good ol’ dollhouse from 13 Going On 30. Ariana looks so simple and innocent in this costume, it’s so unlike the rest of the video. I loved the single tear rolling down her cheek.
16. BRUISER ON A POOL FLOAT
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Of course they needed a Bruiser. I will say, that’s a big fuckin’ chihuahua. It’s gotta be someone related to this video’s dog, because surely they could’ve cast a more normal sized chihuahua?  
17. THE BEND AND SNAP
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YASSSSSS. Ari’s got the best bend and snap I’ve ever seen, other than maybe Elle Woods herself. Also I just noticed that lady in the purple jumpsuit and beaded braids looks identical to the woman in the movie from this scene. It’s all recreated to perfection.
18. THE UPS GUY
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Zamnnnn get it, Paulette. UPS guy is a smokeshow. “I’ve got a package.” “He’s got a package.”
19. F*CK YOU
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Mood always. Just me in my dorm room, working on my fitness, studying for my Torts final, wearing a crop top, flicking off the haters. 
20. THANK U NEXT, BITCH
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BEST PART OF THE VIDEO. NOTHING WILL EVER COMPARE. MY NEW RINGTONE. HISTORIANS GET OUT YOUR PENS. KRIS JENNER JUST WON 2018.
THANK U NEXT, BITCH!
In the name of breaking the internet,
CA
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kkamist · 6 years ago
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tags (ღ˘⌣˘ღ)
ok so ive been tagged in different tags by different people ,,, nd have procrastinated on actually doing them ,, so i decided to compile all of them in one post !!
warning: this will be a v long post ,, read only if u wanna ,, know more abt me i guess (why would u lmAO)
fact tag?? i guess
rules: tag 9 people you want to get to know better and answer the questions
was tagged by maria !! @s0ftminho ♡ඩ⌔ඩ♡
Relationship status: single
Favourite colour: yellow,, peach,, nd black
Top 3 ships: oof idk?? oo nomin probably !!
Lipstick or chapstick: i dont use them :”)
Last song: im listening to gfriend - rough rn!
Last movie: spiderman homecoming hAHHAHA ( i was doing a mini marvel marathon bc my dad had the movies and didnt ! tell ! me ! but i uh stopped there lmao )
Top 3 shows: i dont watch shows often,, but i do rly like knowing brothers, night goblin :”) nd its dangerous outside the blanket! oooo theres also cafe amor that is p cute too !!
Currently reading: ok if manga counts, kimi no todoke nd bnha ,, if not ,, waking gods by sylvain neuvel (but i paused like ,, last yr prob hAHHA)
kpop + music tag!
ok so i was tagged by @01yoonjin to do ,, both of these tags if im not wrong,, and @maetaamong tagged me for the music shuffle tag and @hyuunjins tagged me for the kpop tag thingy aha
music shuffle tag
rules: put all of your phone’s music library – no playlists! – on shuffle. list the first ten songs that play. bold the song(s) that lift your mood and italicise the song(s) that makes you the most emotional. then tag ten people!
mad city - nct 127
campfire - svt
us now - vixx
hold me tight - bts
talk me down  - troye sivan
paradise - nct 127
too good - troye sivan
grr 총량의 법칙 - skz
another world - nct 127
blue - troye sivan ft alex hope
kpop tag
rules: answer the questions!
1) 5 favorite groups?
skz
nct
nuest
sf9
w1
2) Top 5 on your bias list? (no particular order)
hyunjin
(lee) chan
(lee) mark
chanhee
jr (jonghyun)
3) Ult Bias group and why you love them?
oof ok i,,, dont know? im not the type to actually Stay ulting a group?? like ill stan then ,,, then,, get into another grp,,, yeah,,,, im not v loyal aa my friends always ask what grps i stan and im liek ,,,,, idk,,,, i stan a Lot,,, (that was a real convo between a new friend i made weeks ago) but i guess,, atm its skz? their music is,, my taste? like the meaning of it nd all,, and uh theyre also v v fun to b with,, there isnt a moment when i dont smile whenever i see one of their vids or during their vlives :”) tbh what i like the most in groups i stan is their humor lmao,,, like if theyre v funny, i automatically love them even more :”))
4) Ult Bias and why you love them?
again,,, idk man,, i dont think i even Ult hAHHA ok but i ,, rlly like bae jinyoung nd chani hHAHHA ok but also ,,,, hyunjin. that boy,,,,,  id do anything for him tbh ,,  also bjy wasnt even mentioned in  2 but,,, i rlly love him ,, like idk,, i dont stan w1 as much now but ,, whenever i see him im like :-))))) (same goes for chani aa) fiuwe idk y i like them sm tho aa
5) Favorite Kpop Meme
iiiiii dont have any guawdeij
6) Favorite pic of your ult? (I dare you to only pick one)
ok what,,, i dont even know my ult hAHAH
7) 5 Favorite Kpop MVs
dont stop - twice (this is in jap tho,, does it count?)
nuest - daybreak
blooming days - exo cbx
you&me - kisum
go - nct dream
8) 10 Favorite Kpop songs?
vivid - loona/heejin
heart attack - loona/chuu
singing in the rain - loona/jinsoul
scentist - vixx
boss - nct u
rollercoaster - chungha
shine - pentagon
blooming days - exo cbx
trigger - vixx
my valentine - vixx
nd a lot more auief
9) Favorite Kpop crack video?
oof i dont watch crack often-
10) Favorite content creator within the fandom?
all of them!! :”)
11) What fandoms would you say you’re an active member of?
aa atm the sk fandom !! i was q active in the svt fandom in my main blog but i dont make content anymore :-( i do want to b active in other grps (like nct nd sf9 nd mayb nuest) but i dont have enough Commitment to run other blogs at the same time :”)))
12) Take your top 3 biases- fmk
these arent my top 3 but-
F(riendly convo with) - murk leeeee
M - oof tbh id marry seungcheol or mingYU OmG :-)))))))) hes not my bias but ,, hes such husband material tbh ,,,,,,,,
K - lee chan bc he,, keeps Killing me w those looks even when im tryna stan another grp ughrei
13) If you could be best friends with any idol, who would you choose?
chani? or chenle!! for chani ,, we’re q similar nd we both like chicken !!!!!!!!!!!! so yes. for chenle ,, we’re also kinda similar but we def have the same humor ,,, which is always great  :^)))))
14) If you could date any idol, who?
hm,,, tbh these days ive been feeling Soft for mark (lee) nd !! also bjy ,,,, ahHa im sorry hyunjin yshvriIHFED
15) What’s one Kpop album you think everyone should have listened to?
vixx - eau de vixx bc nO ONE i know talks abt it :-((((
16) Are you a soft or a hard stan?
swoft??? or medium idK HAHAH
17) An idol that makes you go into soft mode?
100% hyunjin,,, Also bjy.
18) An idol that makes you want to smash the empire state building with one single punch?
o man is also hyunjin aLSO mark lee :-))))))))))
19) Favorite vocalist?
oof hm,, defo seungkwan ,,, seokmin,,, basically svt’s vocal team :-))) oOF reading this again ,, yo haechan???? God tier vocals,,, pls stan nct :-)))
20) Favorite Rapper?
oo ok so i watched high school rapper nd i really like osshun? nd oH bang jaemin :”) aa i need to watch s2 soon jgafiue
in terms of idols, defo 3racha,,, theyre So Good uiahrfiu
21) Favorite dancer?
aAA in terms of girls: cHUNGHA!! for boys its ,, basically all of svt performance team nd,, ten and taeyong- (i like a lot of dancers its hard to choose ifajoiwe)
22) Things you have in common with your ult?
ok i,, dk my ult but ill just do it w the idols i put in in that q - for hyunjin i feel like we ,, both struggle w cooking lmAo nd have troubles waking up early :”) ,, actually now that i think abt it,, were both v quiet nd shy but when u get to know us? were v Loud nd savage (same w bjy nd chani) also again ,, chani likes chicken, i do too so :-)))))))
23) The mot beautiful trait any idol can have?
hm,, confidence? it takes a lot for someone to just go on stage and sing/dance etc,, like i would Never b able to do that- (proven today: had a skit and had a shaky voice the whole time , also laughed alot oops)
24) Songs that will always make you jam along?
vIVID by heejin nd singing in the rain by jinsoul nD ALL THE OTHER LOONA SONGS-
also rock by skz !!!!! nd nd omg rollercoaster by chungha nd,,, scentist by vixx nd many others hAHAH
25) Your worst wrecker?
in skz its ,,,,,,,, ***** :-)) also nomin have been wrecking me these days ,, rip
26) Any kpop concerts you’ve been to?
0 bc my parents wont let me :-(
27) Favorite choreo?
there r too many-
28) Favorite live performance?
also too many- but i do like concert performances where the fans sing along too- like those Hit me in the feels everytime (eg: smile flower - svt!!!) iahfnie (does this even count lmao)
29) Favorite debut mv?
adore u- svt !! (3rd anniv coming up ihHIWU)
30) Recommend a rookie group
skz obv, loona, unb ,, (g)i-dle !!
31) A kpop song you could listen to every day for the rest of your life?
there is a Lot but prob vivid - heejin hAHAH I RLLY LIKE THAT SONG AUWIFHIAU
20 question tag!
rules: answer 20 questions and then tag twenty people you want to get to know better
i was tagged by em !! @realstraykids  (´∀`)♡
name: hazirah (oo name reveal :^))
nickname(s): haz
zodiac sign: scorpio
height: i am smoller than em ,, barely 5 feet :-)))))))))
languages spoken: ok ,, eng, malay, arabic, uuuh tiiiiiny bit of chinese and im now (kind of) self learning korean :^)
nationality: singaporean
favourite season: ok we dont have fall in sg,, but fall !!
favourite flowers: baby’s breath!
favourite scents: the scent of fried chicken :-)) or fresh laundry ,,, also petrol smell :-) 
favourite color: i answered above but yellow, peach nd black
favourite animal: shiba inus !!
favourite fictional characters: mmmm kacchan nd aizawa nD TODOROKI IFIAEUR HOW COULD I FORGET HIM O Mg frm bnha !! also baz nd simon frm the book carry on, simon by raindow rowell (one of my fav books tbh) ,,,, also tanaka frm tanaka kun is always listless bc hes goals tbh. ALSO oMg USUI TAKUMI FRM KAICHOU WA MAID SAMA OH MY GODUIHF
coffee, tea, or hot chocolate: ok in cold countries i Always get hot chocolate,, here in sg i always get green tea,, or ice lemon tea sometimes :-)))
average sleeping hours: 5-6
dog or cat person: both but more towards cats tbh
number of blankets you sleep with: 1
dream trip: the world !! or like japan/england ,, 
blog established: feb 1 2018
followers: a number :-)
random fact: mmmmmmmm i broke my fast w two of my friends last night nd caught up w each other nd im v happy :-)))))
nd thats the end !! (not really,, theres like 2 slefie tags but i have 0 pics oops) but if you read through all this,, congratulations,, you probably know me more than my classmates :-))))
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ofhowls · 6 years ago
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WANTED CONNECTIONS ! below you’ll find a list of wanted connections, please fill them before i commit sewer-side. if you wanna talk, you wanna discuss – send me a message on discord ( jayden#7437 ) ! okay, that’s all.
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alvarez, odette – quick summary: twenty-nine, cancer, has a daughter ( ava: played by lane ), engaged ( nicolas: played by pj ), is a florist because life’s a joke, kind of hot-headed, has a messy past we don’t talk about, would beat someone up 10/10, don’t test her, drives an ugly pick-up truck ( bella’s from twilight, don’t ask ) and owns a fluffy kitten named mango. 
plot one – mother: long story short, her mom was around 16 when she had her ( would now be in her mid 40′s ), was a prostitute who didn’t care and was all around a trash human being. odette moved into foster homes before she turned 6 and she was in and out of them throughout her entire childhood. when odette had ava, however, she moved back in. and their relationship turned messier real fast. she moved back out at eighteen and has been staying away from her mom ever since. her mom only ever contacts her for money, she’s that bitch. fc could be salma hayek, but any mexican fc in that age range is a1.
plot two – sister from another mister: odette lived on the street in her teens, often running away from foster homes because they were GROSS. i want someone from her past in sheffield. i really, really want their relationship to have been like them kiddos in the movie thirteen ( 2003 ), you know? like hella ride or die but also toxic af. fc doesn’t matter but white people are gross so a person of colour, mayhaps? they’d be either her age or older, and obviously a womf because she hates men.
* NEW ! plot three – butler: look, she’s marrying rich and i’ve already established that she’s best buds with the butler. he’s old, he’s nice, they’re just having a good time together. all that i know about him is … just that, cool! he’s worked with the talbots for ages so, you get like +3484 plots with this one. do it, i beg of you. jeremy irons is a snack and so is jeff goldblum. think about it. 
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apolskis, julian – quick summary: twenty, leo, has had cancer come and go since he was 10, is a bit of an asshole, its a defence mechanism though, lost his leg a year ago, has a sister ( kitty: played by lane ), currently dating ( micah: played by patty ), is in a band, plays drums, has a deadbeat dad that his mom sends fake happy bday cards from. 
plot one – father: basically, back in the good old days ( about 11 years ago ), julian and his family lived in seattle. living their best life. and then, he got diagnosed with cancer. in came the bills and his father split. he’s been out of their lives ever since, not really giving a hot diddly darn about his son – or the rest of the family, not that i care about them. he’d be in his mid 40′s or older by now. any white male fc would work but hugh dancy is dear to me. 
* NEW ! plot two – hospital buddy: give me a friend for this motherfricker, okay? someone who might be sick, too. someone who’s been at the hospital with him, someone who knows that struggle of DYING. you feel me? this person can literally be 80 years old, i don’t care! as long as they’ve spent some time in care with my boy, maybe even roomed with him, it’s all good.
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atkins, scarlett – quick summary: nineteen, gemini, mother’s a dead socialite, father is an alive asshole, used to smang her step-brother ( milo: played by pj ) before he ditched her, was kind of the queen bee before she ghosted on all her “friends” for a fancy college, got kicked out of said college for an adderall addiction, is now at rock bottom and forced to hang with the losers, super manipulative and selfish, kind of got a rough exterior. 
plot one – old friend: i really want someone who used to be friends with her either before she became miss popular or before they graduated. either way, she would’ve ditched them for bigger and better. i want beef, i want dramas – i want this bitch to suffer. before she hung with the it crowd she was a freaking mathlete, so don’t you forget it. honestly, cady heron is SHAKING. i say as i stole it from lindsay weir, whatever. she was also a cheerleader in her later years, if that helps. i’m very cliche. they’d be like nineteen, and preferably a womf but i’m not picky. 
* NEW ! plot two – father: all you gotta know about ray atkins, is that he’s garbage. he’s a rich bitch, the richest damn dude in town, and he cares approximately NOT AT ALL about his daughter. he’s constantly going back and forth between pushing her to achieve things and not acknowledging her presence. it’s a hard knock life. rape tw // there was also an instance where scout experienced assault at a party and he blamed her for drinking, so … not the nicest. on top of that, he doesn’t allow scout to speak french in the house ( her mother was french, uwu ), and that’s MEAN. anyways, any white/puerto rican man in his 40′s and up will work. 
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baek, wolfgang – quick summary: thirty-five, capricorn, loves horror films and has made quite a few, dad is a famous director ( bigger in korea than the states ), has triplets because his dick is that powerful, went from mr. friend zone to mr. i’m sorry i gave you three babies at once, sort-of-dating ( ziba: played by patty ) really talkative and amazing, works at blockbuster because that’ll support a family, am i right, lads?
plot one – work pal: he’s at work a lot, ok? and he needs friends. it’s a win/win. i need someone for him to do stupid work stuff with, make working a fun experience! i want a squad like in chuck, you know? if you don’t know what i’m talking about then superstore, if you still don’t know what i’m talking about then why are you still here? age don’t matter but i would prefer if they were close in age. gender, who cares. bye.
plot two – partner in crime: basically, he makes a lot of indie flicks. he actually only moved to sheffield to work on a screenplay but… it’s been a while. i need someone who makes movies with him, though. a co-director or someone he keeps casting as the lead because bros, ok? once again, preferably close in age, gender doesn’t matter.
* NEW ! plot three – cousin: i mean, hewwo? most of his extended family is back in korea, but – but – i could imagine his aunt or uncle would’ve moved to the us shortly after his parents did. so, a cousin would be neat! someone his age, someone he can talk to about childhood stuff, someone who understands his unspoken rivalry with his father, someone to babysit his kids. they would’ve lived in florida after moving to the us, thirty and up and preferably a dude. i like dudes. but a woman would work as well. not to mention, half or fully korean!
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bellefleur, kipling – quick summary: forty-eight, capricorn, born and raised in louisiana, has two kids he don’t know about ( lucia: played by britt, jude: played by patty ), a cop at the police station, lives alone with no pets because god hates him, got a partner ( elliot: played by lane ) but not in the gay way, unfortunately heterosexual, kinda grumpy, kinda just annoyingly white. 
* NEW ! plot one – hook-up: kip is a sexual being, believe it or not! and sometimes, a mans need a nut bust. he’s a great lover, i swear. but he’s not a great mans when it comes to the romantics. he does have two kids he don’t know of, after all. just give me someone he visits late at night, ignores in public and have fake deep convos with whilst sharing a cigarette in bed. really painting a picture here, aren’t i? unlike other fathers in this town, he has no interest in sleeping with someone his child’s age, so –– thirties and up!
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cheung, beatrice – quick summary: twenty-five, aries, middle school teacher, a big fucking lesbian, dating ( kaylee: played by patty )super sociable and outgoing, literally loves partying and hanging out with the youths, self-proclaimed big sister to just about every teen out there, works part-time as a waitress at the diner, used to be engaged but we don’t talk about that, foster kid with no connection to blood-related family. 
plot one – coworker: someone at the diner! just someone to have her back, to gossip with, to hang out with after shifts, to just be gal pals with, you know? she needs more gal pals. i love throwing movie references in there, but – think whiplash with ellen page. that kind of aesthetic, that kinda shit. from mid to late twenties, a woman because i don’t care for men. 
plot two – pseudo-sibling: i want her to really play the big sister role with someone! have a little baby she can pass all her heaux wisdom down on. just a wee bean that she considers a little sibling of sorts. she could even house them for a bit since she’s back to living alone! they’d have to be in their teens and gender, once again, does not matter!
* NEW ! plot three – foster sibling: she already has like fifteen, so give her another. tris is probably the youngest among the bunch and owen ( played by fanny ) is somewhere in the middle. it’s just a nice jewish household that fostered a lot kids, cool? any fc, any ethnicity, any gender! just older than twenty-five, is all i’m asking. neat, thank you for coming to my ted talk. 
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cowell, stefan – quick summary: twenty-nine, scorpio, construction worker, married ( lumen: played by pj ), got a little sister who he always fights with ( arella: played by kt, whenever she returns to us ), hates dogs, kind of a prick, a huge prick actually, sort of running from the law but like on the low-key, always 100% done with just about everyone’s shit. 
plot one – work buddy: like i said, he works construction. and i want him to have one friend. like a singular friend. someone to grab a beer with, someone who he doesn’t wanna strangle. it’ll be a miracle but it’s a miracle i deserve damnit. they’d have to be in their late twenties or older, a dude and any fc. 
plot two – neighbour: it sounds like a basic plot, but i promise you – it’s worth it! i want him to have a god damn family feud plot going on, okay? i want them to fight, i want neighbours ( 2013 ) as a plot on tumblr dot com. i want him to hate them and i want them to hate him. fc don’t matter! gender don’t matter! preferably around his age or older, though. 
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halonen, oliver – quick summary: thirty, aquarius, part-time mechanic, part-time bartender ( think coyote ugly because that’s hot ), used to be engaged ( marty: played by tasha ), got a fake daughter ( pauline: played by pj ), has some slight drug issues she’s working out atm, also her dad’s back from the dead ( uriah: played by lane ), she’s super nice and cute and you should all love her sarcastic ass. 
plot one – work friend: i feel like i just want everyone to have coworkers, but listen… i genuinely just do. either someone that works as a mechanic alongside her or another bartender who sometimes uses their bod for tips, it’s all good. i want her to have one friend her own god damn age, you know? they’d have to be a gal because men are smelly. age would be around her own and that’s it!
plot two – dealer: listen… drugs come from somewhere. and even if she’s not currently using, i’d love for her to have that dynamic. maybe she owes them money, we can make it hella messy or we can make them chill pals, idc! i just need her dealer her and i need them to push some drugs. plus it’s a buy one get one for free type of deal ( see my plots for ed further down ). i want them to be a little older than herself but other than that it’s free for interpretation. 
* NEW ! plot three – drug bud: this bitch is from texas and this bitch did a lot of drugs in texas. she spent her early twenties high as fuck, overdosed at 24 and then got clean. legend? yes. she’s got a lot of good influences, aside from one particular asshole, and i just want her to be more pulled into old habits! let her have some friends from her old life of criminality and drugs come to sheffield and shake things up. any fc and gender, though they’d have to be in their 30′s!
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hodgins, nathaniel – quick summary: twenty-one, gemini, works as chef at the pub, skipped college to help his mama with the bills, got a cutie-patootie golden retriever, dad is in prison after a drunk driving accident that killed a 10 year old, moved to sheffield a few years ago for a fresh start, a big ass home of sexual, has a crush on a comp het ( vince: played by pj ), loves his mother more than anything, only child, conceals trauma with humour and bad puns. 
* NEW ! plot one – ex-something: now, i’m not saying they dated. i’m saying they hooked up and it never lead anywhere. it can be angsty, it can be fine, it can be a garbage fire. we can work out the details whenever, i’m cool like that. any fc and any gender, though preferably in their early twenties!
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holstad, damian – quick summary: eighteen, aries, the biggest fuccboi you’ve ever laid your eyes upon, fucked your girlfriend ( and he meant it ), brother to the biggest loser in town ( lou: played by tasha ), parties every weekend, best friends with the second biggest fuccboi in town ( artemus: played by nico ), kinda soft but he won't ever let you know that, has a crush on his brother’s bff ( pauline: played by pj ).
plot one – ex-girlfriend: it’s simply unrealistic that he hasn’t dated at least one of the fifty bazillion girls he’s smanged. now, it’s probable they didn’t last more than a few months but its still a plot I NEED. she’d be either a junior or senior in high school right now. so, either graduating now or next year. face claim don’t matter. it’s possible he cheated, he’s an asshole like that.
* NEW ! plot two – more fuccpeople: at this point, i’m collecting them. there are a bunch of fuccbois in damian’s life right now, and i need there to be more. there needs to be a whole fracking pack of them. just running around town, smanging ladies and taking names. could’ve played football with him, could’ve graduated with him, could’ve just lived next door – i dunno! around eighteen… a boy, or a girl! fuccgirls are VALID too. 
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kinney, sawyer – quick summary: twenty, sagittarius, volunteers at animal shelter, studying to become a vet, loves animals more than she’ll ever love a man, has a rescued bunny named waffles, her parents died in a car-crash we don’t talk about it, has a younger brother ( grayson: played by patty ), soccer is her life, also wanna fuck the soccer coach ( elliot: played by lane ), her first ‘kiss’ was a dare at age 5 with her cousin ( holden: played by pj ) for an ice cream, did i mention she loves animals, takes virginities for charity, happened once but i demand its a thing now, boinking mr edgelord ( quentin: played by pj ).
plot one – team mates: soccer is cool! soccer is for champions! she’s currently the team captain of the local all-girls soccer team, i know – such a title. and i want her to have more of a team. so gather up your gals in their late teens to early twenties and kick some balls around!
plot two – ex-boyfriend: before she swiped virginities and had sex with boys who love serial killers, she probably had a steady boyfriend. kind of a puppy-love-they’ll-probably-get-married-straight-out-of-high-school relationship, you know? they probably broke up because they were way too young and it was more of an availability thing rather than genuine attachment. does that make sense? it’s a small town! their parents probably loved their child’s respective partner than they loved each other. 20-22, any boy of any fc i’m not picky.
* NEW ! plot three – enemy: it’s a hard plot to ask for, but i request you hear me out. she never fights with anyone. she’s SO NICE. a walking mary sue, i swear. and she’s just friends with everyone. it’s boring! give me someone that gets under her skin! someone for her to absolutely fucking hate! for no reason or for a reason, idk! around twenty-one, any gender.
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larsen, margaret – quick summary: forty-two, libra, has one terrible son ( teddy: played by lane ), though she loves him more than anything, left the country because she was a hoe, mortician, got knocked up by her professor that one time, kind of boinking her son’s bandmate ( holden: played by pj ), doing her best all the time but keeps on making mistakes, the biggest mama-bear you’ll ever stumble upon. 
plot one – ex-hook-up: listen, she left the states to study in the uk – mostly to get away from her parents – but also because she had a bit of a reputation. like, a really bad one. so if you have a character, or want to play a character, that grew up in sheffield and are in their forties… wink wonk. that’s it. that’s the plot. 
* NEW ! plot two – hater, hater: peggy was a skank in her youth, okay? she was a downright slut and she probably rubbed a lot of people the wrong way. she most likely still does! so, i want some judgmental hoes up in this bitch. i want them to bicker and i want it to be very small-town-desperate-housewives-esque. any lady. preferably around her age range, would’ve lived in sheffield all her life.
* NEW ! plot three – best friend: peggy only ever speaks to kids, it’s weird. give her. bud, and like i said above… desperate housewives is a fucking neat ass show. they can drink wine and they can gossip and they can judge her for the people she’s sleeping with. or, well, person. any woman in her 40′s, please and thank.
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mullin, casper – quick summary: fifteen, aries, fucking love aliens, the government is lying to y’all, has got a whole ass squad of friends, kinda gay for one of them ( eli: played by pj ), kinda intimidated by another ( ava: played by lane ), if it wasn't obvious he’s a gay, has a pupper that means the world to him, always investigates creepy shit because he is that white person.
plot one – disgraced nuclear physicist: you heard me. basically just the plot of back to the future. someone a bit ( a lot ) older than casper himself that kinda takes him under their wing. they’re as nutty as him when it comes to conspiracy theories, and maybe they feed his ideas and stuff when it comes to the shit going on in town. please and thank you. 
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pearce, minoo – quick summary: twenty-one, aquarius, the biggest of edgelords, expert in stick n poke tattoos, hates her family, loves their big ass dog, a military brat, skated pretty much everywhere because she’s a walking cliche, not anymore though cause her bff broke it ( vince: played by pj ), invented grunge, would kill herself for the lead singer of zero boys, wants her mom to die ( rachel: played by lane ), wants the cop who's trying to get in her pants to die even more ( sera: played by tasha ), almost dropped out of high school fifty times but i forgot to make it canon. 
* NEW ! plot one – enemy: i love enemies. anyways, mj is a fucking bitch. she’s so edgy, she’s not like other girls, and she definitely would end up in a fight with just about anybody. there’s no way in HECK there aren’t people in town who hate her guts. they could’ve gone to college with her, they could’ve gone to high school with her, i dunno! i just want her to FIGHT. preferably a girl, preferably in her age range. 
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oswalt, kevin – quick summary: nineteen, virgo, had the most tumultuous of childhoods involving both kidnapping and murder, she doesn’t talk about it, has sort-of-a-boyfriend ( jamie: played by pj ), and a definitely best friend ( pippa: played by lane ), currently living with her father ( dalton: played by britt ) without the knowledge that she’s his daughter, her life is messy, she likes books and writing, thinks sheffield is kinda fascinating, the biggest of nerds, kinda awkward but we forgive her. 
plot one – brother: we already have her father, mother ( marion: played by nesh ), and two sisters ( lila: played by luna, and hazel: played by fanny ), and now all that’s missing is the second youngest kid! he’d be like 21 years old, white with blue eyes because that’s a trait near and dear to us, and … a dude-bro. we have this hc that he’s in a band and kinda just does his own thing. free-spirit. also, to summarise the family history REAL QUICK – you can ask for more deets – kev got kidnapped, family fell apart, marion and dalton got divorced, the kids chose sides, markus ( the brother ) chose to stay neutral, they moved away while dalton stayed, and now they’re all back. 
plot two – study pal: not quite as in-depth as the one above, but! she needs a study pal. she’s currently attending the local college and she has zero friends who actually go to school. give me someone for her to work on stupid projects with, someone she’s forced to get to know and get out of her comfort zone with. they’d be 19-20 and fc/gender has no importance. 
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sutton, eduardo – quick summary: fifty-two, taurus, literal fucking drug-lord, gang leader, owns the silhouette bar outside of town, loves his daughter a lot ( carmen: played by britt ), never smoked a weed in his life, jk, lost his wife a bazillion years ago, now banging the woman who failed save her ( lorelai: played by patty ), has three dogs which he kinda loves more than his daughter, killed a lot of mens in his life, just all around a good dude. 
plot one – brother: ed comes from an cuban-catholic family from new orleans and his father was kind of an asshole but his mom was alright. however, he was always closest to his little brother. so please, for the love of god, play him. you’ll get to play an uncle if you do, it’s pretty hot. any cuban fc in their late forties would work, but raul esparza is a hot fucking take. 
plot two – gang members: he’s a gang leader, ok? he needs more to lead. they hang out at the silhouette bar, push drugs through town and are all around just a good group of people. give me all of them to be honest. think the southside serpents from riverdale. or whatever they’re called in sons of anarchy. fc and gender and stuff don’t matter, however – ed would never allow someone under twenty-five. he’s a family man. 
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talbot, mikhail – quick summary: thirty, pisces, the softest boy you’ll ever meet, a nurse at the local hospital, got a kid on the way, dating a ginger bitch ( liza: played by pj ), best friends with his cousin ( nic: also played by pj ), best friends with his ex ( emma: played by lane and not pj ) coaches the kids football team during his spare time, also works a couple of shifts at his father’s ( robert: played by luna ) hardware store, really just genuinely fucking nice, kinda depressed but you’d never know. 
plot one – high school friends: he’s lived in sheffield his whole life. he was on the football team, he was popular – he was a fun dude to hang with. it’s unrealistic none of his high school friends stuck around. so! give me a couple of those. they can be anybody as long as they’re around thirty years old.
plot two – kids to coach: self-explanatory, really. but if you want to play a kid on the football team, speak now or forever hold your peace. teens, boys probably because sports ball is sexist, just someone for him to coach and teach the way of sports ball life. 
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weathers, elizabeth – quick summary: forty-two, sagittarius, freaking neurotic, forgets her own son ( eli: played by pj ), remembers her other every now and again ( jesse: played by nico ), wishes she could forget her husband ( andy: played by lane ), her bestest and smallest son was taken from her almost two years ago, yes this plot came before she was winona ryder don’t judge me, stay at home mom yet has no reason to stay at home.
* NEW ! plot one – emotional support: the woman lost her son, she needs like a mom support group on facebook. she needs someone who understands her loss. maybe someone who’s lost their own kid, obviously not to a giant bunny, but it’d still be kind of relatable. someone she can discuss her divorce plans with, you know? a woman in her forties, i’ll accept nothing else. 
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kommunisti · 7 years ago
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@no-discourse-onlywrites u really expect me to read all that? i’ve seen that post around, i know the general gist of it, i don’t care. it’s still the same old “blah blah slippery slope if we don’t let people post underage then next we’ll be burning books” and “well i don’t support x but it’s just fiction so let people do whatever they want”
not to mention you reblogged that from fucking v*spider who is a parent and straight up told me that if their kid found cp or material like that online, it’s said preteen kid’s responsibility to not read/look at stuff that upsets them. as someone who was actually traumatized by all the abuse porn i read since childhood, i find v*spider an abhorrent piece of shit who probably shouldn’t even have kids
i have good reasons to hate how accepted abuse is in fandom, i know all this “history” you all keep trying to teach me, i’m almost 24 and have been in fandom spaces since i was 11-12 and i know my shit. i grew up with this stuff. you can pretend this is about lgbt content being censored but seeing as i posted gay porn on lj for ages, i find it hard to believe there was great persecution of all lgbt content. i was part of several gay fic comms that never had any issues with content being deleted
you are liars who use homophobia and abuse victims as tools to defend your/other’s right to enjoy cp, incest, r*pe, etc. you don’t care and you have never cared. not once in +10 years have i seen content being deleted for being lgbt. what i have seen is people like myself who have genuinely been hurt by how fandom normalizes and defends abusive content. for years i believed all kinds of fucked up things because fandom taught me that abuse is romantic/erotic
and when i bring it up, i get victim blamed with “you’re just too sensitive”, “you’re crazy and need therapy”, “maybe you shouldn’t be allowed online”, “it’s your fault if you can’t tell reality from fiction”, “maybe you were just too immature, mature kids can handle that kind of material”, etc. you claim to care so much about abuse victims, but only when they’ll back you up and support abuse fic as a method of “coping” even when in reality it’s retraumatization
not to mention how you reward kids who accept abusive material by calling them mature etc. as if that’s not straight up grooming lmao. maybe you buy into all of this and genuinely believe you’re doing the right thing, who knows. still, you’re helping abuse thrive in fandom as it always has. that’s the truth, whether you like it or not. i used to be like you until i started using some critical thinking so it’s not like i don’t know where you’re coming from. i just know it’s the wrong side and i’m never going back there
you’re not going to “open my eyes to the truth” or whatever you think you’re doing. i’ve had this same convo with a billion people who all said the same stuff. i’ve heard it all and it’s all bullshit. you all keep signing after the good old days when in reality fandom is a shithole and it used to be even worse. you wanna be the fandom equivalent of a conservative, i don’t care, but generally people who don’t want things to change because they have it good are in the wrong
mayhaps consider why the most vulnerable of people have never had as much fun as you have. it’s not because we are overly sensitive, it’s because you lack compassion and the willingness to sacrifice your own comfort so others might suffer less. fandom doesn’t exist in a vacuum, it’s no fucking safe space, and we’ve always had the same issues as the society we exist in. fandom is full of abuse and bigotry just like the rest of the world, and that won’t change as long as people like you deny it
i have no more to say, either listen to what i have said or don’t. i don’t have the energy to beg and plead people to see me as a human bring deserving of respect, only to get told i’m as bad as fascists and should be institutionalized for saying we can’t accept abuse lol. have a good one
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hanalwayssolo · 7 years ago
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My Attendance Is Bad, But My Intentions Are Good
A/N: My last piece is for day 2 of @glaiveweek! Permission to write my Kingsglaive babies having a happy time. Written in Crowe’s POV, because. My girl. Deserved. Better. :) Inspired by the entire team dynamic in Brooklyn Nine Nine (I want to explain this further but gosh I think it merits a different post) and governed by most of my headcanons with these cuties (again, to be explained probablyyyy on a separate post), so please expect lots of crack, shenanigans, a truckload of pop culture references, etc. 
Ahhh and tagging some folks again: @eternallydaydreaming2015 @hypaalicious @louisvuittontrashbags @cupnoodle-queen @theyearofdiamonddogs @nifwrites @themissimmortal
Nyx Ulric 3:02 AM Glaives, we have a situation.
Crowe was still awake in the comfort of her bed when she caught Nyx’s message in the Glaive group chat—one that Tredd renamed lil fuckaz for the heck of it earlier—and she followed the trail of messages that popped in her phone screen.
Nyx Ulric 3:02 AM I know you guys won’t believe this but
Nyx Ulric 3:02 AM Check the captain’s calendar
Nyx Ulric 3:02 AM and get this: he’s free tomorrow
Nyx Ulric 3:02 AM AND HE’S NEVER FREE
Nyx Ulric 3:02 AM And then I remembered
Nyx Ulric 3:02 AM WHY OF COURSE
Luche Lazarus 3:03 AM yes nyx we know it’s the captain’s bday tomorrow
Crowe smiled at Nyx’s overeager message thread; knowing Nyx, she immediately assumed her good lad of a friend was somewhere in downtown Insomnia, drinking his stress away. Also, she didn’t expect Luche to be awake at this hour. In any case, something about this conversation confused her. Apart from Nyx’s rowdy chat etiquette—which she was fairly used to—what bugged Crowe was her memory of things: she clearly remembered getting partied out a couple of nights back thanks to Drautos’s birthday party hosted by no less than the Glaive’s personally-dubbed veteran party animal, Clarus Amicitia.
There was a brief minute of pause in the group chat commotion, and then:
Nyx Ulric 3:03 AM Nobody asked you Luche stfu
Nyx Ulric 3:03 AM Anyway. As I was saying.
Nyx Ulric 3:03 AM Yes, it’s the captain’s birthday tomorrow
Luche Lazarus 3:04 AM i’m willing to bet my ass you’re planning an outrageous surprise party
Nyx Ulric 3:04 AM You can bet your pasty ass i will and WE SHALL DO IT
Before Crowe could even chime in, Pelna already butted in the conversation, and started wrecking his own havoc:
Pelna Khara 3:05 AM count me the fuck in
Pelna Khara 3:05 AM i’ll buy the cake
Pelna Khara 3:05 AM clarus didn’t let me buy the book cake last Year :(
Pelna Khara 3:05 AM *boob
Pelna Khara 3:05 AM ***boobs
Pelna Khara 3:06 AM had to correct that so y’all know the cake was shaped as a pair of boobs not just one
Of course, where there was trouble, Crowe already thought that Tredd was close by, raring to add to this steaming pile of shenanigans.
And when Crowe saw his name pop into her screen, she grinned. When it came to her personal assessment of her friends, Crowe was always right.
Tredd Furia 3:06 AM lmao
Tredd Furia 3:06 AM i’ll go buy the booze my fam
Tredd Furia 3:06 AM also is it just me or nyx is using punctuation marks or am i just 2 high
Nyx Ulric 3:07 AM Fuck you Tredd
Nyx Ulric 3:07 AM I was trying to drive a point
Pelna Khara 3:07 AM nah tredd just too high i can secondhand smoke your joint even from here
Tredd Furia 3:07 AM fuck u pelna :) :) :)
Nyx Ulric 3:07 AM Anyway thanks guys, we’ll do this in briefing room A
Luche Lazarus 3:08 AM i didn’t agree to the alcohol losers but whatever
Nyx Ulric 3:09 AM u scared daddy’s gonna dish out some disciplinary action, leader? ;)
Luche Lazarus 3:09 AM fuck u
Axis Arra 3:10 AM i can’t believe tredd woke me up for this shit
Nyx Ulric 3:10 AM And Crowe, I know you’re awake I can see your tiny bubble just lurking in this convo
Pelna Khara 3:11 AM wow axis just responded to a group chat conversation
Pelna Khara 3:11 AM blessed be the stars
Tredd Furia 3:11 AM this surprise party’s gonna be litttttt af
Nyx Ulric 3:12 AM hi there axis you and sonitus take care of the food
Axis Arra 3:13 AM ok
While the conversation rolled along, Crowe still had this nagging feeling that the entire arrangement was too… odd. Luche easily joining this nonsense was already out of the ordinary, but Axis—quiet and soft-spoken Axis Arra—replying to this mess and just agreed to help organize this shitstorm? Crowe had seen her friends do strange things, but this one weirdly made her queasy. Not to mention, they have been acting rather funny around her these past couple of days. She stared at her phone screen, trying to rake her thoughts on that last party. She was definitely sure that party happened. She could still taste the acrid smoke from that sordid bar, and she could still remember hooking up with that heavily tattooed man whose name was the only thing that she lost in her nebulous memory.
Just when Crowe was about to protest for a clarification, another message arrived from Nyx:
Nyx Ulric 3:15 AM btw where tf is Libertus at
Luche Lazarus 3:15 AM Poor Libertus Ostium, he is missing action
Luche Lazarus 3:15 AM So now I’m facing Nyx Ulric with his own faction
Pelna Khara 3:16 AM he’s very attractive in the north, Lucians like his chances
Tredd Furia 3:16 AM he’s not very forthcoming on any particular chances
Nyx Ulric 3:17 AM Gdi you all have been making hamilton references for a MONTH
Nyx Ulric 3:17 AM Can we get back to the task at hand please
Crowe sighed in exasperation as she scrolled away to more chunks of messages. Before the chat group could spiral into a new brand of trouble and out of its original topic, she finally managed to type her response:
Crowe Altius 3:18 AM libertus ran an errand with the crown prince’s advisor glasses boy
Crowe Altius 3:18 AM anyway
Nyx Ulric 3:19 AM THERE’S OUR FAVORITE MAGE
Pelna Khara 3:19 AM hi crowe moon of our lives
Tredd Furia 3:19 AM our khaleesi is here
Crowe Altius 3:18 AM you guys are fucking idiots
Crowe Altius 3:18 AM ANYWAY wasn’t the captain’s birthday three days ago???
Crowe Altius 3:18 AM pelna you even posted photos on your instagram acct
Crowe Altius 3:18 AM With the caption “today the Big D was born let us rejoice”
Crowe sat up on her bed and waited for a reply, but she later realized that she just unleashed a treasure trove of disaster with her last statement:
Pelna Khara 3:19 AM hey u gotta love that caption
Tredd Furia 3:19 AM and u gotta love the Big D
Nyx Ulric 3:20 AM i know luche does ;)
Luche Lazarus 3:20 AM haha very funny nyx
Tredd Furia 3:22 AM hahahahahahaha nyx gdi i choked on my fucking beer
Pelna Khara 3:22 AM that was some mighty fine dish that got served
Luche Lazarus 3:22 AM u sure u didn’t choke on some big d tredd :)
Tredd Furia 3:22 AM nope. but hey luche
Tredd Furia 3:22 AM ur ass is grass
Tredd Furia 3:22 AM and imma mow it
Axis Arra 3:23 AM eyyyy
Nyx Ulric 3:23 AM LMAO OK SEXUAL TENSION ASIDE
Nyx Ulric 3:23 AM Relax you guys
Nyx Ulric 3:23 AM I know we all love our big captain drautos so much
Crowe Altius 3:24 CAN SOMEBODY PLEASE ANSWER MY FUCKING QUESTION YOU BAGS OF HELPLESS DICKS
Pelna Khara 3:24 AM as you wish khaleesi forgive our brethren
Pelna Khara 3:24 AM to answer your question: yes, but that party was from the higher ups
Pelna Khara 3:24 AM his actual birthday is tomorrow
Pelna Khara 3:24 AM crowe my sun and stars trust me on this
Luche Lazarus 3:25 AM i can confirm pelna’s statements
Tredd Furia 3:25 AM same
Axis Arra 3:25 AM ^^^
Sonitus Bellum 3:25 AM hi
Nyx Ulric 3:25 AM i confirm pelna’s statements as well
As well? Nyx hated attaching that in any phrase, Crowe remembered, for reasons beyond her. Despite the group’s typical rascally response, Crowe still felt skeptical about the whole affair. With reservation, she decided to give her overthinking head a rest and get along with their shady plan.
She quickly thumbed another message:
Crowe Altius 3:28 AM fine whatever
Crowe Altius 3:28 AM count me in
Crowe Altius 3:28 AM anything i need to do nyx?
She chewed on her lip, praying to the gods that she won’t be assigned with something out of her comfort zone, so she added:
Crowe Altius 3:28 AM and by anything, i mean anything except talking to the other commanding officers and anyone from the lucian council pls
Crowe particularly had a severe dislike talking with her other superiors, specifically Cor, Clarus, and even King Regis himself, after saying something completely inappropriate at a Kingsglaive gala two years prior. After that embarrassment, she sealed everyone outside of her Glaive circle for self-preservation.
The sudden inactivity in the chat group made Crowe want to throw another message for good measure, until Luche broke the momentary radio silence:
Luche Lazarus 3:33 AM more booze
Crowe Altius 3:34 AM right
Nyx Ulric 3:35 AM You’re the best, thanks
Nyx Ulric 3:35 AM Let’s all meet tomorrow at 2pm sharp
Nyx Ulric 3:36 AM I’ll try to stall the captain to give us time for prep
Crowe sank back to her sheets and turned off her phone so she could finally get some decent shut eye without the distraction from the Glaive chat group. She stared at the ceiling, trying to quell the unusual excitement  that bubbled up in her chest, until it was brutally ambushed by a feeling that often creeped up on her whenever she started to enjoy any form of happiness.
On occasions such as these, Crowe wondered how celebrating birthdays would feel like. It was not as if she wanted to keep her birthday from everyone else—she just never knew what her actual birth date was. Having brought up as an orphan, she had figured that birthdays were only afforded to people living with their biological parents. Or people with legitimate paperwork. She had neither the luxury of those things. Sometimes, she would look at herself in the mirror, study her face, and scrutinize her chocolate brown hair, her brown eyes, and the angular structure of her cheekbones. Crowe thought that maybe, this was how her mother would have looked like, or her father...
Crowe groaned in disdain. She didn’t need the pity party at this ungodly time. She pulled the sheets over her head as she promptly derailed the depressing train of thought, pressed her eyes shut, and forced herself to sleep.
Crowe did as she was told and brought additional liquor with her on her way to the Kingsglaive HQ. She was pretty certain that alcoholic drinks were prohibited around the Citadel premises, but no one seemed to have caught her, so she just casually marched on toward the hallway. She rounded into a corner, where she saw Nyx standing by the doorway leading to the briefing room, holding his phone close to his ear.
When he saw Crowe approaching, he tucked his phone in his jacket. Nyx nervously beamed, “Hey there!”
Crowe raised an eyebrow out of suspicion. “What are you doing outside? Where are the others?”
Nyx answered, “Well, actually, they’re on their way but Captain Drautos is already coming in any minute—“
“Weren’t you supposed to be the one to keep him occupied?” Crowe asked, narrowing her eyes at Nyx. She had a bad feeling about this.
Nyx held her by the shoulders. “Yes, but change of plans. Look, can you please help holding off on the Captain for a while—“
Crowe instantly shrugged his hands off. “Nope.”
“Please?”
“Not interested.”
“With a cherry on top?”
“Gods, Nyx—you had one job.”
“Alright, fine,” Nyx ceased making any further effort, raising both his hands in casual surrender.
That was surprisingly easy, Crowe thought. If anything, Nyx was persistent, but this...
She let it slide. Crowe rolled her eyes and sauntered past Nyx. She opened the door and—
“Surprise!”
The confetti exploded from the party poppers in myriad of colors, together with the booming voices of the rest of the Glaives. The entire open space of the briefing room was filled with familiar faces—Libertus, Pelna, and Tredd each had a Li’l Malbuddy balloon in their hands, while Axis, Sonitus, and Luche carried a Li’l Malbuddy plush toy. The walls were decorated with scarlet-colored streamers and rows of gold letter balloons.
It took a while for Crowe to register that the balloons spelled a Happy Birthday Crowe! which totally did not make sense to her at all.
“Wait, what’s going on? I thought—guys, is this a fucking prank?” She bewilderedly trailed off. She was about to lash out until she saw Captain Drautos walking towards her, which even added more confusion to this entire event. “Captain?”
Drautos shook his head and addressed the Glaives. “You fools, I told you she wouldn’t get it if I didn’t give this to her first,” he casually smacked Nyx at the back of the head. They all burst out laughing. “Anyway, it’s because of this—“
The captain handed a brown envelope to Crowe, which she flipped open. Inside was a record, a file with her full name and her… birthdate.
Crowe gasped and croaked out the words in disbelief. “Wait, today’s… my birthday?”
“We found your records with Clarus’s help,” Drautos explained. “I regret ever mentioning it to Nyx as soon as I found out—the word spread like wildfire among your peers. It was a surprise that you didn’t find it out, with Nyx being a loudmouthed idiot. Anyway, the Glaives thought of throwing you a surprise party since you’ve never celebrated your birthday with us before—or uh, I’m sorry, I mean, it’s not that you didn’t want—“
“It’s fine, sir,” Crowe stared at the file she was holding. There it was, written in permanent ink: full details of her birthplace and birthdate. It didn’t disclose any info on her biological parents, but Crowe couldn’t care less. She read and reread, helplessly trying to wrap her head around all of this, until all she could say was: “Thank you. Really, guys, thank you—but wait. That thing in the chat was…”
“That was actually Nyx about to spill the beans with his drunken little mouth,” Pelna admitted, stepping closer with the Li’l Malbuddy balloon hovering above his head. The rest of the Glaives followed, gathering around Crowe. Pelna continued, “I was with him so I had to punch him right in the mouth for being dumb. We had a different chat group specifically for Operation Crowe. We humbly thank the gods that Luche was just smooth enough to save that conversation and we all had to improvise to throw you off the scent.”
“Well, someone had to keep you guys in check so you’re welcome,” Luche smugly added. “And by the way, you gotta thank the crown prince’s advisor for this merch. He tipped us off on where to find these.” Luche, Axis, and Sonitus rewarded Crowe with the Li’l Malbuddy plushies.
“You guys were… all together in this?” Crowe asked, and strangely enough, she was genuinely touched by the idea that everyone joined for this effort. She wanted to squeeze everyone into a hug and beat them all up for giving her feelings.
“Of course—everything for our little sister,” Nyx grinned, slinging an arm around Crowe’s shoulders.
“Don’t make me claw your eyes out,” Crowe said, elbowing him on his side that Nyx winced in pain.
“Whatever. Happy birthday, munchkin,” Nyx hugged Crowe. With the thought finally sinking in, tears of utmost happiness began to threaten her eyes. She wanted to punch herself in the face for wanting to cry.
Crowe looked curiously at Nyx, still controlling herself with her happy tears. “So is this why you guys have been acting weird for the past days?”
“See, I told you guys she’ll notice,” Libertus remarked. “Now, give her the damn cake before she starts crying!”
“I’m not crying! There’s just, I don’t know, a rock in my eye...” Crowe sniffed, and the rest of the crew laughed.
Libertus playfully shoved Nyx away from Crowe and wrapped her into a big bear hug. “Happy birthday, Crowe.”
“Thank you guys so much,” Crowe said with a teary-eyed smile on her face.
Roaring fits of laughter bellowed around the room when Pelna finally brought out a ghastly dick-shaped cake with a candle sitting at its tip.
Tredd announced, “So I know Pelna promised a boob cake, but Luche wanted the D—“
“It was the only cake available, asshat—“ Luche interrupted with a sneer. Everyone was still laughing at the atrocity of the confection in front of them.
“Sorry Luche, the D’s not for you,” Pelna teased. “Give this one a blow, baby girl.”
“Oh my god, I hate all of you!” Crowe laughed and cried. When it came to the business of brewing the finest hilarity and crazy antics, Crowe couldn’t trust anyone else aside from her comrades.
Everyone joined in and sang her an equally cheery and drunken happy birthday. And on occasions like these, Crowe found it difficult to permit herself to relish the happiness. But in the company of the people Crowe now considered as family, she finally did—and there was no place in Eos that she would rather be.
19 notes · View notes
elizabethrobertajones · 7 years ago
Text
13x02 watching notes
i'm on a train. choo choo.
expectations: helpfully wrote them out last time for the season as a whole which this ep is introducing all the plot stuff for since last episode advanced the plot a single day of angst, but this episode especially has a few SUPER low bars to pass. Last time out BL failed spectacularly to not kill Eileen. now we have "don't assault mary, over-sexualise the day old guy, or flub introing the new characters, or reintroducing the returning ones"
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our train was like 10 minutes late out the station because there was no driver. is this a metaphor.
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i also had to eat krispy kreme doughnuts before I could dig into the episode.
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oh jeeze Drexel survived season 12... no one really has a fanclub for the random minions, probably because around Simmons we realised there was no point getting attached. and he was in some of the worst scenes of last season just because of the context. which is a shame. also he's a lucifer fan and that's not really a worthwhile position. anyway hope springs eternal that colonel sanders is such a charismatic character he makes the demon scenes worth watching... and Drexel gets to be interesting. And stop saying lines like 'make hell great again' which is so not a good thing to put in his mouth - at least the other demons who were going around saying it it was the white demon who said it and got the stink eye from the other demon.
One of the other demons says "can you even hear yourself" but idk if BL would crit their own writing unlike competent writers whose first port of call is stressing that they are bad writers and mock their corny dialogue
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this also raises the semi perpetual question since season 11 that if Crowley's throne room is here why would any of the pretenders to the throne even want it. they seriously need to justify it. We know devil's gates are a pain and not usually open so smuggling minions out to work topside is an issue but there are other workarounds than establishing a campy hell set that's not even in hell, then getting confused about if it's hell or not, and never really explaining why Lucifer would stick around in it except for the fact Crowley is really good at setting up a system and it would be a shame not to use the pre-established set up.
but eh
I really sincerely hope Asmodeus is just here because Crowley's ex-minions are here and will relocate post-haste to his plantation.
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He hung up his coat. Drexel survived though. I guess being a named character has its perks. the sun shone in my eyes the entire time so i was quite amused when the train turned a bit and i saw demons dropping with burned out eyes, angel-style. like Dagon being super duper powerful, I guess they're giving him extra powers - because this is just a few steps up from how Sam was exploding demons with his head at one point and he got his powers from a YED... though in 5x10 when Lucifer killed all those demons he also didn't burn the eyes out. it's probs a stylistic choice. in character and out.
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Nougat!!! he's so cute. he's sleeping at an angle to be behind Sam in the convo. The camera points at Sam from the dash and at Dean from Sam's POV, and Jack is in his background. methinks this is about Sam.
He's trying to make Dean sleep and calling out how he hasn't had any, which is nice because I was worried about that earlier.
Dean is calling Jack "it" which I think was in some people's pre-season fic, or else if it weren't it was in the one i didn't write :P Blatant convo is blatant but does at least have an actual honest to god lead into the next scene via the mom is dead conversation. Again we get the super zoom close up on sam being sad and questioning dean's thoughts. assert yourself, sammy! i believe in u
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(totally on your side too Dean but the sun is too bright to examine your micro expressions and the camera isn't favouring you anywho so you're a rewatch flavour today)
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Satan wants to trade Mary for Jack. Well if Dean knew he'd sell Jack for a corn chip anyway (is that Crowley's phrase from the original weird dog episode?) so that's just a great big victory. methinks the choice will fall on Sam or fall on Dean after he's had a chance to bond with Jack some more - that's the other side to the tension about Dean liking jack that i was talking about earlier whensomeone asked me why everyone wants dean to adopt jack.
ideally mary saves herself or it never comes to it but for now i'll assume whatever else happens between here and there, some version of this plan will at least be floated, even if it's random circumstances and not lucifer's hand any more or something
makes sense anyway to tie mary back into the main arc in a way like how she mirrored cas the entire time last season - if her fate and jack's are connected even tenuously it gives her a connect back into the main thing
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oh good the woman next to me has finished her dangerously over-full cup of Pimms because I was terrified it would be bye bye laptop
nnnoooo as I type she refilled it
the train is swaying back and forth so much
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anyway Mary asks Lucifer why he wants to be a parent and he hints several times in a row that he has hidden depths without actually showing any of them. i don't want him to have a redemption anyway and i really super duper don't want him to have one written entirely by BL
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Colonel Sanders continues to try and liven up the story while giving us surface level exposition
I'll be honest, 'write that down' is the first good line... must be whichever of BL is quippy currently writing. I think they just introduced a monster taht lucifer is scared of but I couldn't catch what it was and for some reason another demon is listening in so is he getting ideas? I mean why to what end? also what exactly was the thing that was locked up because it sounded like a cut price Leviathan expo dump but obvs not that because a leviathan would eat Lucifer
i mean i don't think we pay enough attention to the fact that dick roman would just gobble lucifer up and end of story. bring back dick.
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*Pimms lady sways dangerously close to my laptop*
I think Sam accused Dean of hallucinating "shit" on the road because it's too noisy to hear him say "sheep". I just assume that is what he actually said in the non-censored version
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pls drink your Pimms fast enough to end this danger but not so fast you're sloshed and throw it on my laptop before it's all gone
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Cashing in on that new Scooby Doo partnership! Some bank like Halifax is currently using Scooby Doo to sell stuff so I see that dog on telly all the time and the fact they exist in the same fictional universe as Sam and Dean is kiiiilling me. I think we have all been assuming Jack takes us to Scooby World so plonking him in front of the telly to watch some is how it all begins. Dean, like every fan fic between 13x01 and now hates Jack unreservedly for having childlike enthusiasm about the telly because Cas used to do that, while (semi)unaware that Jack is mirroring HIMSELF from 12x11 most closely right now. I think that's an interesting parallel I don't know how much work has gone into but pls poke me to write about Jack's 1 day old child-like wonder compared to sweetie pie no memory Dean if no one else has done it because they're essentially the same character from completely different angles, and we're about to hit Jack mirroring Dean excessively.
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Me: don't excessively sexualise the kid
BL: "here read a book" *chucks the Bible at him* *he opens it to the Song of Solomon* We're NOT having this chat right now.
I suppose some people just meta-gasmed all over this. I don't know much about the Bible but I do know that's the sexy bit.
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the "I can take the couch" conversation probably put the exact same thought process in Jack's head as mine when my very lanky brother looked at the lil brick hard bed set up in the corner of our hotel while we were stranded in Glasgow, and looked at me, princess and the pea-syndrome sufferer, and nobly offered to take a bed that *my* feet stuck 3 inches over.
No.
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Thanks but no.
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aw man we're only at Carlisle.
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It's the promo scene as well, which mostly just drove home how much Jack is mirroring Dean... We've had basically no character interaction in the missing day, although we can assume it's mostly gone like this... Dean annoyed, Sam forgiving Jack for being adorable, and Jack being adorable. He's getting better at sarcasm as well, which can't be making Dean feel any better about him.
And that means that the "Castiel is my father" revelation happened off-screen and we're not being given any room for a reaction about it, which is the most annoying part of this. I knew 13x01 was an anomaly and going into a BL ep so soon after would deprive us of some of the emotional depth, but it's like having a bucket of cold water dumped on us :P
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I think Dean's 'sometimes' about family being good is going to be a criminally underrated line and I don't even know if I can bring myself to remember it all the time in discussions about how Dean feels about family going forwards but this is a note that i heard him say it and acknowledged it means he has some issues with blood family ongoing.
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Jack being adorably human blah blah, Dean aggravates the issue by being really mean about insisting Lucifer is his father and asking if he reached out to Jack and now Jack's remembering him doing that. Hey leave the kid alone, Dean, his blank slate was slightly messed up by waning to be like Cas which is obviously an excellent exemption to  having a blank slate.
Maybe there's a metaphor in him agitating the bad father sitation over here.
I don't know if Jack should have asked for clarification there so let's pretend there was a hesitation and a "Ca -" "*Lucifer.* Your father." exchange. Or something.
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And now Nougat is lying about emotional strife, like's been agitated into being a Winchester from his great blank slate
GAH Stop gesturing by the STILL FULL glass of Pimms
they keep topping it up and it's not good for my stress levels
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I think I just missed basically everything that happened because all I could see was my own reflection but then they were like *rising tension music* *scuffle* *donatello* so I assume he jumped out on them. Mental note to go back and see who was defensive of Jack and what he did.
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*casually mopping up my neighbour's Pimms as it splashes dangerously close to my laptop while listening to Donatello's exposition*
the good thing about BL episodes is that you can often just kinda chill and  listen to the exposition if it's just a chunk o dialogue and nothing offensive is going on so we're making progress through the ep
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*dean is super bitter about who does and doesn't have a direct line to god for some reason*
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Awww Sam says they're brothers and it's a family crest when he is saying Jack should get the tattoo <3
*completely* robbed of Dean's reaction
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WHY DID THEY NOT TELL JACK IT WOULD HURT
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I went to the loo and came back to them wiping Pimms off their phone
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Well Jack just completely put Dean in his place RE: pain, when he told him to man up about it and Jack was like right we accept pain as a sign of maturity... this is absolutely not what Dean meant but it is probably a healthier approach to it minus all the toxic masculinity
can we get to 13x03 and an ep written by Berens soon :P
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Jack accidentally absorbs his warding. Oops. I guess that angel warding was a WEE bit OTT I mean I'm no expert but that looks like a total pain to be dealing with all the time for the makeup department :P
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Also must have taken friggin ages
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I still don't get why Donnatello is here except to use as a chip in their arguments... Ah well. Dean arguing intent doesn't matter freaky powers are freaky powers because he's still pissed about what happened to Cas and can't see the much more basic thing that Jack didn't mean to get Cas killed and OBVIOUSLY didn't intend it if he was waiting for Cas to be there for him when he popped out of the womb. I think for all the random avenues this took in fandom this is probably about as deep as the show will go if this is how BL are spelling it all out for us... And the answer is all there on the page already but we're just using Dean as the alternate side of the argument to show his own character stuff going on where he can't deal with Jack because he's upset about Cas. And he was always more concerned about Cas than the philosophy of whatever else was going on
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Train going through the Lake District... I am enchanted. It's a grey day w/ very low clouds and water on the ground and all the trees are autumnal. Sue me, this is more interesting than Donatello being unhelpful. He backed up Sam's argument earlier w/ saying Lucifer felt toxic and Jack is somewhat more like his grandfather, but then once he starts talking he's like hurr blurr as a scientist nature wins and he's a monster and then Sam's like I thought you were on my side dude and then Dean angsts about Cas some more and calls Jack the devil and he decides he better start teleporting now because leave me alone not-dad and get off my case
I hope we see his wings. Dean asks in 13x01 if he had wings and equated it to teleporting and I suppose we don't know how demons do it but the assumption is if he's half-angel adn can teleport then he has wings
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Oh no it is KILLING me how Jack's thing is sitting cross legged. PROTECT HIM.
Sam finds him, thankfully, after the Sad Kelly Montage. There's a very Northern man behind me talking loudly on the phone so I'm gonna concentrate SUPER HARD now
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The hotel is called the Black Hat which I think is western coding for the bad guy. There was a house in the prairie art on the wall, and the single isolated house is how Jack came into the world... He's dealing with towns now.
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Exposition Mooose! Telling us Dean gets some wires crossed about getting angry whe nhe's frustrated and scared  like yes good expose dean for us some more... explaining him to jack is like hey so um he's an acquired taste... trying to make this about protecting everyone instead of pointing out the obvious that he blames jack for what happened to cas
Jack is a winchester because he's like maybe i'm not worth it
help
and them Sam brings up w/o knowing it was on jack's mind that kelly thought so but also is a blatant link to how they used dead!mary to guide their lives right up until she came back...
... and then so would Cas and so would I. Sam aligning himself with Jack's parents to show he has emotional guardianship of him right now
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has dean gone down to the bar because it's called th eblack spur and obvs not the same one but i'm like 100% sure that's the bar from 10x01 where he was hanging with Crowley and I'm not gonna fact check that. it's "black" again aka more nature stuff, more coded evil stuff I guess? I don't know anything about Westerns I admit
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And hey look a blonde bartender is chatting to him - there's a Jack ale sign on one side... and hahahahahaaaa no there's a Kingdom Beer sign behind Dean over his shoulder because the director wants to kill me
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So far this is the weirdest BL episode Ive seen in a long time because they're trying so so hard to be all nuanced and deep and to explore character stuff and carry on the mood from the first episode, while being direly under-equipped to handle it, so everyone's just blurting exposition all over the place in a series of awkward exchanges. The overtness of the dialogue is actually helping in a weird way to rush through the tick boxes because Dean just admitted to seeking his neglectful father's approval from a standing start which is a sign of progress for him to just leap right into admitting his issues with John. I don't have a frame of reference for this because tired and white noise and noting we're pulling into Lancaster and it looks like rain now and there's a guy travelling with an enormous silver mirror with an ornate frame as tall as he is on the other platform and more pimms is on the table... but yeah when DID he last talk about John? Is this the increased openness since 12x22 we were hoping for? Is my backpack okay because it's in a luggage rack I can't see and if someone nicks it they're only stealing all my laundry but I like some of those t-shirts so it would be a bummer...
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Lol surprise Asmodeus, no wonder she pushed all the father stuff... Was he talking about Lucifer then? It's everyone has father issues season. He's fitting in as another mirror in it all. Like the great big shiny mirror the dude at Lancaster station had. I'd honestly not be surprised if John came back in some way just cuz we had the Mary season where motherhood was a theme, and now we're doing this. I don't think John would come back for good liek Mary but they could scrounge up a more direct way of confronting his memory at least.
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This also is so unsubtle bcos Dean had no idea what the bartender looked like so he coulda just tended the bar and chatted to Dean b4 he knew who Asmodues was, and we could have had some cool tension like we all know that Colonel Sanders is the bad guy and Dean's just chatting him up a bit. But then when do we ever get such things in a BL ep?
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Sam just goes and spells it out about Jack being molded and the ambiguity of his father figures aka the dual nature battle they think Jack should have, with a deciding vote already thrown in there by Kelly and of course that Jack has free will and choice
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So Mary just nearly got assaulted, tho not by Lucifer, which was not exactly a pleasant surprise. >.> idk what that guy's problem was but he seems to be implying women can't fight and something something I didn't catch but clearly he doesn't see a whole bunch of women. This is literally the antithesis of the show's handling of female hunters since the start so I'm going to have to assume that this is an AU thing like, total worst timeline, and everyone's sexist to boot. Not really a fan of doing this at all because why are humans made out to be just as bad as meeting angels and demons in this world - Mary being at risk from ALL of them (where is BOBBY I wanna see wtf was going on between him and AU mary and our mary and our bobby) - and it being disappointing that Mary's at risk BECAUSE she's female and might get assaulted.
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Lucifer continues to try and act like a good guy by saving Mary and then of course the Nice Guy twist that always comes - if you won't give me what I want that I'm pretending is mutually beneficial then I will just hurt you.
They're chilling by that church from 8x23 now so I guess Mikey will be along soon.
Preston Station looks like a hellscape as well - it's packed and there's no ticket barriers. I'm so glad we were only passing through
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Dean comes in and sits down with Sam with the shadows of the blinds falling over them - prison imagery I missed you! We're trapped in these mindsets...
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Sam wants to get them on the same page and Dean is like F U and Sam's like lemme do exposition while you sit with the shadow over your eyes.
I wish there was a shadow falling over my eyes... We've passed back through to hazy sunlight south of Preston.
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Sam says people who we love, and who have been in our lives for a long time, in such a way I bet some asshole is excluding Cas from one category bcos Mary doesn't count in the long time category so maybe one is for her and one is for Cas
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obviously that's the real donatello because he only cares about breakfast and is an object of ridicule while Asmodeus was presumably the other and actually talking plot.
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this is an idiot ball moment tbh because Jack hasn't been in any hotel scenes for a while and somehow we've shuffled through all the characters here and not had any of them with Jack or checking where he is despite him being the most precious cargo, and it was bugging me earlier that dontatello and sam talking meant jack was alone because he wouldn't be w/ dean so where was he but Sam didn't ask? they just chatted? And obvs that was asmodeus but yeah... no one's keeping an eye on him and D. wasn't even supposed to be taking Jack to get breakfast or what? If that wasn't him then what exactly did Sam think Jack was up to?
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Also Sam tanking the mytharc Dean tanking the personal arc - he talks to both of them w/o them knowing and guess what each's conversation is
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And also Dean came in with food as well like there's major miscommunication going on here if the real donatello was getting breakfst and so was Dean but is that the point or is that just a plothole where this doesn't add up properly if you actually try and map who knew what and - was Dean the one SUPPOSED to be watching Jack? But Sam didn't ask him either.
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Anyway here's the demon that Dean's entire fight scene is about straddling to death.
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I also loved his march down to the room where he was all in shadows
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The last shot of that fight though where Dean's cowering away from the demon on a bed while it advances on him with a knife
like wow that was a good fight scene for the dynamics going on there. Dean as a victim being absolutely dominated by that demon and all the associated knife and weirdass positions imagery. Dean on that table with his legs around the demon is like an entire meta on its own as well
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okay it was too bright when I saw the scene where Asmodeus was talking about that whatever it was he let out but I THINK that was the same demon I thought I saw overhearing it and now I am wondering what on earth that was about because Dean just killed him :P
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Awww Jack out in nature. I love the flowers and the buzz of insects and life all around him. And Asmodeus is testing him.
Okay it's been like one episode how can he have character inconsistency with himself from earlier in the episode - he now wants to unleash the things he got in trouble for unleashing before? I mean unless he's decided that Lucifer really isn't coming back so might as well just throw a party while there's no adult supervision, and get back to all that chaos and destruction he loves. If he thought there was remotely a chance Lucifer would come back he wouldn't do it, but then is he just doing it now out of spite that Lucifer told him no before, and instead of whatever nonsense he said about family dynamics back then is not really true at all because he wants to rebel now instead.
If Jack unleashes the thing because he was tricked then it will be the biggest Sam and Cas mirror thing ever and will set him up with some angst and guilt for the rest of the season.
One of the downsides of Dean not getting along with him is that Jack doesn't know how much scepticism about God is a healthy amount in this universe. He basically just knows that God is his grandfather and family is usually good. But God is suuuch a bad concept to rally behind here, it's not even like God wouldn't ask him to do it because God never tells anyone what to do about anything (which is like the first thing Dean would have told Jack if he hadn't still been sulking God wouldn't lift a finger to help him over the whole dead Cas issue), God would also just never have any positive reinforcement for anyone or get excited about having a grandson, at least in a way to get actively involved :P
I mean Chuck probs thought that Donatello making his way to Jack was about as useful as he could be and that immediately went sour when no one kept 2 pairs of eyes on each other at all times.
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Wyoming has some pretty nasty stuff under it :P
I wonder if Hell maps exactly to earth but just kinda deeper.
Also point to me for rambling about hell gates earlier and then Asmodeus actually listening to my suggestion box for once. Maybe he will be the one character who can actually hear me in this show.
Hey you, you're an asshole
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Is Lucifer aware he literally just lead them in a circle because I am so not telling him that, because it's too funny.
I hope Jack didn't inherit his sense of direction but this is Dabb era, as soon as that kid gets a car, trouble starts.
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The midlands are so bleak.
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These angels are wearing heavy tactical gear and yet more kneepads. The human had them too. This is just kneepad world. I don't see the necklaces of baby ears so maybe that design thing got ditched or maybe Bobby was being metaphorical.  The important thing is they don't look like Cas. The weird thing is we know Mikey's costume sort of does look like a ragged Cas.
Anyway Lucifer is so offended to hear Michael killed him even though it was literally the most obvious thing ever the entire time we've known about them and since 12x12 we've had extra info to prove it :P
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Omg why are you opening champagne on a traaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaain
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MIKEY
He wanders in like hey I'm awesome but also I need to immediately open with super obvious exposition lines
Lucifer accuses him of being dressed like he came from a western too which goes with the thematics back in the Earth part of the story and also makes me think maybe the costuming choice was supposed to kinda mirror Frontierland Dean's 2nd costume because why the fuck not this is Dabb era, rules are for suckers :P
I can't see it w/o the hat but maybe he has a hat elsewhere.
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this hole down into the centre of the earth looks REMARKABLY like the one the 2nd season of Shadowhunters had in the season finale, so I need Magnus to just wander over the rise and close it now. Also his eyes glow gold and cat like. Is his power literally equivalent to Jack's? He's like ridiculously OP in that show. I guess all that hiatus watching was research.
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Ah, Asmodeus has learned the "Oh shit it's the Winchesters" moment already, especially recognising the car. Them driving right onto the scene has the oddest shades of 5x22 without anything being remotely like it except it's a field, hole in the earth, and car.
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Okay why did Donatello yell "that's not Donatello"
this is like the reverse of the best version of this scene I've ever heard which is the one from the end of Here Be Gerblins in the Adventure Zone which I will not spoil for you except to say this is the worst and also it doesn't take too much listening to get to that point and I nearly cried laughing so you should probably go listen. More hiatus watching research!
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The other option is D is having a total crisis of self w/o a soul or the evil D is actually the real thing and Asmodeus is helping them for some reason.
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LOL he's like hi I'm Crowley's replacement so the line now is "howdy boys" intead of hello boys
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As soon as Jack knows what's up and sees his new peeps getting hurt he stops because he is precious and he did nothing wrong and I love him
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AWW HE THINKS THEY'RE HIS FRIENDS I LOVE YOU NOUGAT
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Deal with that, Dean.
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Mary like "... should I be shuffling backwards?" "I SHOULD BE SHUFFLING BACKWARDS, BYE"
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Lucifer said he needed Mary, Mikey says he needs Lucifer... I think that phrase is being turned over and ruined now. The necessary step of Dean having said it to Cas that one time when he shoulda said I love you... They had a brief critique of "need and want" and some stuff about i and we, which was what last season was doing, but Cas feels bad bcos he feels needed but not wanted, and this is as much as Dean has said to him - from the depths of his heart - but it's not enough because that was season 8 and he hasn't felt like he belongs and he needs that I love you. Uh but w/o using "need" - look, they're gesticulating with champagne again, I have 1 eye on this at best as we roll through the midlands for an eternity :P Anyway I guess it is time to put "need" in the firing line as the Wrong Word that means that you're USING someone.
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WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING??? DEAN DOES NOT SIT AT THE TABLE LIKE THAT. OH MY POOR, POOR BROKEN CHILD LET ME HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS
I know it's probably for that wonderful shot of them through the door but Dean fundamentally does not sit up against the wall - he and Sam have their places at that table when they have their chats and it's a serious thing since the entire time theyve been using the kitchen for important plot chats.
Anyway he super not okay bcos that's his seat he sits at when he's in his proper place in the dynamic - or improper one but the point is the dynamic is the dynamic when they sit opposite each other and Dean's opted out and flopped back against the wall instead of sitting where he normally does when he and Sam are in balance. Sam's connection to his seat has some other flavours of his side of the codependency issues but largely about his lack of assertiveness or getting too messed up about saving Dean, so we'll see
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AAAH Sam is sitting one seat over as well.
I know it's a free table but there's 8 seats and REMARKABLY little flexibility about it.
Dean's wearing a black henley which is also baaad news. *pats him on the head and follows with a blanket*
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Sam stands (or sits) his ground
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Dean, gosh, I don't like when the camera follows you because this is probably going to be awful for my heart.
We also have not really had his POV much this ep except the Asmodeus chat up scene
He's mostly reacted. Like he thinks Jack is only reacting.
I DON'T LIKE THIS SCENE
PROTECT JACK FROM HIMSELF TOO
I hope he was just being curious like a super amped up version of how Kira on Orphan Black found out she has super healing powers so sliced her own arm open while being scared and fascinated with what she was and pissed off the adults wouldn't tell her anything but this was gross and violent and pls protect Jack because that was awful.
Dean's suitably horrified though because he has to contemplate Jack is just as freaked out and lost as he is about this whole thing because this is a gross and horrifying way to show that Jack is as fucked up and lost as the rest of them. I don't think he was actually trying to kill himself esp. because he knew the angel blade already stabbed him and did nothing and even if he doesn't know what it is and why that's signficant he knows he didn't die of something that should have killed him... I hope it's just childlike curiosity mixed with bleak existential horror as he comes to understand how much he doesn't understand himself even in the context of the world he's in...
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OH NO
but also good lines of dialogue they acted super well. Jack is starting to think he can't be saved if Dean doesn't think it and is silently asking him to do it because he doesn't want to hurt people and oh gosh this isn't 10x09 at all where Deran asked Cas to do it to him... But completely different emotional landscape where Dean WOULD do it and wants to and Jack is only just starting to doubt himself and wonder if he would hurt people and the important thing is not like Dean thinking there was a line he would cross and half-tricking Cas into saying he'd do it by asking him for a favour first, but Cas not being able to oblige him in 10x22... This is Jack being such a good pure piece of nougat that he's SCARED of what he is and what he can do and beginning to think that he might need to be killed esp. because Dean thinks so and this has been a bad day for him... even though again his nature shone through, Dean thinks it was a "sneeze" and Jack still doesn't have a developed enough moral compass to understand what he did except that we can see it was a good thing.
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And final shot Jack reflected in the mirror all bloody and sad and I need to zoom in on that later to see his face because like magic the sun is out again when I want to look at the screen.
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End episode here. Good. That means Dean angstily listening to music is in 13x03 almost for sure because I want it to be (uh, sorry that's not science :P) but it would be a great Berens to Berens chat with self about 9x14 and Dean angstily listening to music there.
I am not actually where were we are any more except powering towards London, but I'm gonna put my laptop away because they're still topping up the champagne and I just survived a BL episode where nothing so awful happened that I can see the fandom outrage from a million miles away and the worst I can say is that they are an exposition machine and I wish they had more nuanced dialogue because in someone else's hands that character stuff would have been delivered well rather than just delivered :P
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flyba3 · 7 years ago
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Move-In Day pt. 2
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A/N: Idk if this should be cute or spicy… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i kinda, maybe, probably wrote this while listening to creepypastas…..
Genre: Fluff
Pairing: Reader x Junoflo
Summary: Y/N and Juno go on a lunch date, and get to know each other.
Word Count: 2292
“We are we are we artist baby
We are we are we artist ZICO” 
 was the first thing you heard as you woke up. While you searched for your phone, you realized that it was your alarm playing ‘ Artist ‘ by Zico, one of your favorite musicians. Once you finally felt your phone, you turned off the alarm while looking at the time. It was 8:30am on the dot. Luckily you didn’t start classes until next week, but it still puzzled you why you woke up this early in the morning. As you looked across the room at Monica, you prayed you didn’t wake her up. But to you surprise, she was already up looking at her phone and headphones on, so she probably didn’t hear your alarm. Today’s plan was to meet up with you friends, then meet up with Juno at around noon.
You were pretty excited to go out with him, but at the same time it was very nerve wracking because this was the first date you’ve EVER been on. Part of this was due to your lack of interest in dating, but majority of it was due to your lovely family. And the word lovely is meant to be used lightly. Ever since your high school days, someone in your family always took the opportunity to embarrass you in front of your male friends. Whether it be your mom, dad, or even your brother; it never failed. The brother part really hurt you since he was supposed to be your wingman.
The story you can remember most vividly was during your junior year winter break. One of your guy friends, Christian, invited you to the movies with a few of his friends from a different school. Christian said he would pick you up from the park near school, and you guys would meet up with the rest of his friends at the park. You told your parents and brother about your plans for the day, and they were all ok with it. Your parents made your brother drive you to the park and wait until Christian got there. While you guys drove to the park, your brother asked you a series of questions about whether or not you were dating Christian. Of Course you told him no, but he was convinced that Christian want to be with you even if you said the feelings weren’t mutual. Once you arrived, you saw Christian sitting on a bench. As you got out of the car about to greet your brother farewell, you saw he was getting out with you. When you both got to Christian, your brother pretended to be your boyfriend and started accusing Christian of trying to take his girl. Every time you would try to say something, your brother would cut you off. Eventually you told him to cut the crap and apologise to Christian for your brothers behavior. Your brother also apologised and offered to drive you to the theater. Thanks to your brother, you never went on a group date, which is still a date in his standards, with Christian again. But none of that matters now since you’re an adult.   
Before you got out of your bed, you chucked your small mermaid pillow at Monica to catch her attention. The pillow hit her arm, causing her to look up at you with a startled look on her face.
“Ohhhh,  child you got me shookth,” She said as she took off her headphones “ But what’s yup.”
“I just wanted to return a favor, and invite you out with me and my friends.” You told her as you made your way to the bathroom.
“Well lucky for you, I don’t have any plans today. So sure, I’ll hang out with you today.” Monica told you as she but her headphones back on.
When you were in the bathroom you washed your face, brushed your teeth, and took a shower. Once you finished bathing, you went to pick out an outfit for the day with juno in mind. You wanted to look good for him since he seems to be a fashionable guy. As you looked through your closet, you found the perfect outfit. You settled on a black crop top, black ripped jeans, red vans, topped off with an army print hoodie. You decided to put on minimal makeup, and you styled your hair in a neat high bun. As you looked at your phone, you saw that it was 10:15am. You saw that Monica was ready to go, when you saw her sitting at her desk.
“How are you... already ready?” you asked monica as you slightly tilted your head.
“Oh yea, I guess I should tell you that I prefer taking showers at night.” She said getting up from her chair about to get her purse.
“Alright, good shit. Since we’re both ready, I guess we can head out.” You told her heading to the door.
“So what’s the plan for the day?”   
“We’re gonna go my favorite place on campus… the music studio~” You answered in a sing song voice. As you guys were walking to the studio, Monica started asking about your convos with juno last night.
“I saw you talking to Sam last night. He must like you cause he tried to make himself known as Juno. Lol! That guy. So… are you guys gonna go on a date or something.” She asked in a teasing tone slightly nudging you.
“Actually… Sam asked me out on a lunch date later today.” You told her starting off shy progressing into an excited tone as you smiled brightly at her. Monica started to do a little dance as she entered the Campus Art building. Once you guys entered one of the studios, you saw your friends sitting in a circle, and as you you two go closer you realised it was a rap cypher. Most of you you friends were music majors, so it was no surprise for you to find them this way.
“Aye Y/N, aye aye. I missed you aye aye. And I wanna kiss your ne-ew friend.” Your friend Brian said as he ‘rapped’ his freestyle during the cypher, which apparently was dedicated to Monica. You and monica made your way to the circle and introduced everyone to monica.
“Hey Monica, do you like musicians?” Brian asked anticipating her answer.
“Only if they have a college degree.” She responded in a slightly sassy tone, causing everyone to ‘oooooh’ and shout a few ‘rejected’ sounds Brian’s way.
“Well, Y/N it’s great to see you. It’s been awhile.” One of your friends, Allison, says trying to detract from Brian’s rejection, you think.
“Dude, we live in the same neighborhood.” You told her while laughing.
“Hahaha, ever heard of sarcasm?” She says light heartedly mocking your laugh. After a few minutes of catching up, one of your friends suggested having a jam session. Of  course everyone agreed, and everyone went to an instrument, while you and Monica went straight to a mic. After a forty-five minute jam session, everyone exchanged info on where their dorm was. While everyone left, you saw Monic still talking to Brian, and it was obvious that he was flirting, trying to get her number. After a few more minutes, Monica head towards you ready to leave.
“Hey it’s 11:23, you ready to go?” She asked you
“Nahhh, not yet. I have some where I want to take you. Follow me!” You told her as you led Monica upstairs to a studio your brother took you to all the time.
“Wow, it’s beautiful here.. How do you know about this place.” Monica asked in amazement.
“My brother use to bring me here all the time when he had practice for Jazz band.” You explained to her, but suddenly you heard the door open. So you and Monica both turned you head to see who came through the door on the other side of the studio.
“Sam, what the hell.” Monica asked asked surprised to see Sam.
“Hey, I guess I’m not the only one who knows about this spot.”
“Yea, I guess not.” You state responding to Sam, “So, Juno, what are you doing here?”
 “I was just about to work on my mixtape, but I guess I’ll hold off on that. Since you two ladies got here first.” Sam said slightly surprised that you called him ‘Juno’, but none the less still pleased.
“You know what. I’ll just leave cause I not about to be a third wheel.” Monica said as she dabbed her way through the door.
“That girl..” You say under your breath.
“You look good…” Juno says while biting his lip and leaning back against the recording studio desk.
“Boy it’s no time to be flattering, I have a date at 12.” You tell him while walking past him and lightly brush his hand as you make your way to the door.
“I guess I better get going to cause my date looks fine as fuck, and I don’t want to keep baby girl waiting.” He says following you out of the studio. His little comment made you clench in between your thighs a bit, but you played it off. As you and Juno leave the studio, he tells you to follow him to his car. Once you get there you see he has an all black Audi a8.
“You never said anything about being a rich boy.” You told him trying to hide the fact that you’re impressed as you get into the car.
“I guess I should mention, ya boy doesn’t live on campus either.” He says throwing a small wink at you as he starts the car.  
While you and Juno were driving, you asked where you planned on having lunch.
He told you it’d be a surprise, and to sit back and enjoy the ride. While Juno was speeding on the highway, you got a text from Monica.
Monica: ‘ Did u fuck yet??? (≖ ͜ʖ≖)”
Y/N: ‘ Nahh, B… u didnt tell me ya boi has paper “
Monica: ‘ Yea, but we all do TBH lolol, but it’s wat ever ‘
Y/N: ‘ Okiee (¬_¬)... I’ll talk to you later, this man is taking me to hell knows where ‘
Monica: ‘ K, boo. Have fun!!!! ‘
When you looked up from your phone, you saw the car was parked in front of a restaurant that seemed to be on a pier. Once we entered the restaurant we were greeted with a host saying ‘Welcoming to vessel. Please follow me.’. The first thing that caught your eye was the bar in the center of the room with a glass pole that had 4 TVs on each side going through a large hole in the ceiling, and tables that surrounded it. The restaurant gave off a relaxing tropical vibe. The walls were silver with oval shaped indents with in them, but the walls were mostly of windows, showing off yachts and other boats. The host led you to your table on a patio overlooking the ocean.
“Sam… did you plan all of this?” You asked him in awe with a smirk on your face.
“Yea, do you like it?” He asked pulling out your chair.
“Of course, I didn’t expect you to go all out. I don't think I dressed up appropriately for this.” You said as you felt your cheeks heat up.
“Babe, you always look great. Plus, these old fass men should be happy to get an eye full of you.” He says once again complimenting you. Once you both look over the menu, your waiter comes back with water and 2 glasses of wine. You ordered Flat Iron “Steak Frites” and Juno ordered Atlantic Salmon. You and Juno got to know each other more while you waited for your food to come out.
“Did you live in California before college?” You asked Sam.
“Yea, I was born here, but my parents met in South Korea. After they got married, they moved to LA for business.” He explained a small bit of his background to you. “ What about yourself?”
“Yea, I was born here, but my parents are from the East Coast and they wanted to settle down here. Lol I could have been a New Yorker.” You say trying to imitate a Brooklyn accent.
When your food came out, you and Sam went ham, and not a fry was left on your plate.
“Thanks, Sam. I’m blaming my freshman 15 on you.”
“Shit, baby you’ll still look good.” He said leaning back in his chair while running his hands through his hair.
The waiter came back over asking if you wanted dessert, but you guys declined and Sam asked for the bill. After Sam paid, you guys left and head towards the car. After 30 minutes of driving and vibing to music in the car, you guys reached campus. And Sam parked in front of your dorm building.
“I had fun with you today.” You told Juno as you lean across the seat and molded your lips with his. When you first kissed him, you heard him make a sound that was mixed with a grunt and moan. This sound was so sexy, and you couldn't wait to hear more, but you figured it was too soon. You’re sure it’ll be worth the wait because the way your lips melted together made you anticipate that moment. After the kiss you sat back in your seat and looked at him with a seductive smirk.
“Damn baby, your such a tease. But I guess that make you my girl now right.” He asked a slightly disappointed.
“I guess so.” You said getting closing the car door and throwing him a wink.
A/N: Shittttt, the end got a little spicy…. I really want to write a smut, but BUILD UP IS EVERY THINGGGGG    
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autumn-in-phandom · 7 years ago
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MEET HOT DADDIES IN OUR AREA!
(That’s clickbait if I’ve ever seen it)
Dan and Phil play: Dream Daddy #2
0:01 I love Phil in his burgundy hearts shirt. 0:02 Dan’s shirt is a bit distracting but he looks really cute in it. 0:05 The dog *was* the most important thing last time. 0:08 The animated corgi added in and the effect that Phil bops it down with his fist while saying “sadly the owner was quite sassy” was quite satisfying. 0:25 Love the slow pan in intro with the logo and hearts. 0:29 Hearing Phil say “our old husband” is a bit surreal. 0:30 “died!” in sync 0:58 Reaffirming their dad choices are each other. 1:05 Is Dan chewing on something? 1:28 Dan sings “Dream Daddy” 1:39 “We apologize so much.”- Dan
1:52 “Bouncy baby Craig”- Phil (how Phil remembers names) 2:02 “That’s how to instantly be like ‘wrong number, bye.’”- Dan miming texting 2:10 “6 am, no. On the no pile straight away”-Dan “That is criminal.”- Phil 2:22 (I had to look up “swole”) 2:24 Two messages is a little bit desperate according to Phil 2:27 Dan feels sorry that he maybe doesn’t have anyone to do bro brunches with. 2:36 “Sure you wann ‘catch up’” innuendo according to Dan 2:50 “What year is it?”- in sync “3,300”- Phil 2:58 “That’s more Dan and Phil, being late for everything.”- Phil
3:06 Flash back to parents evening, so awkward, judging you to your face 3:23 Bright orange visitors sticker “right on the forehead”- Phil “Bonk”- Dan 3:28 “Haggard” has a wizard association with Phil 3:40 “A youth”- Dan 3:50 Lucien is what Phil wanted to look like in college. 3:55 Probably Dan’s best voice of this game. 4:22 Low rent Gerard Way burn reaction. 4:37 Phil thinks Hugo has “swanky clothes” 4:51 Phil singing “we’re not okay”
5:01 Phil’s “He’s gonna get the cane out” Dan’s reaction and Phil’s giggling while reading 5:25 “Good one” to Dan’s elbow blowing 5:38 I like that Dan just immediately goes for that bell sound effect 5:45 Phil describes their parent teacher conferences, teachers “sass us to our faces” 5:55 Dan’s half mouth teacher imitation we’ve seen in skits. I’m not sure why, but it bothers me a bit. 6:25 “First name basis” Dan dance “Watch out”- Phil 7:47 “I turn around and go damn, he really fills out those trousers.”- Daniel Howell 8:00 Hugo is “too stuffy”- Phil “I’m not into that”- Dan 8:13 “A wet book.” Okay Phil. (Books smell great I’m unstanning) 8:23 Phil clarifies the husband wasn’t killed by kangaroos.
8:35 James Corden singing with Harry Styles in the car reference. (Actually worth watching imo.) 9:22 Dan being disturbed by the father daughter talk in the car sounding like a sex talk. “That sounds like something else.” “Oh god, where’s this going?” 9:48 If I was Dan’s grandma following him on Twitter and watching his videos, I would be concerned by a lot more than just his language. (But they seem to be very close and he probably explained his humor to her long ago.) 10:40 “Is it a meme?”- Phil “Probably, a super ironic meme.”- Dan
11:25 “We know what a mall is.”- Phil 11:30 Dan remembers being shouted at for loitering 11:40 “Heck.”- a quiet and amused Dan 11:44 “Always go for Chinese.”- Dan 11:46 “Oh my god mall Chinese food is the best.”- Phil 12:00 “They have a great bond! Talk about your problems Amanda!”- Dan reacting to Dilddy and Amanda’s food humor 12:33 Their reaction to Phil having predicted the memes convo. 12:57 Dan’s Memeing of Life video reference. 13:06 Phil “lets” Dan say the swear word. Transitions into “dat boy” reference. 13:26 Dan’s over reaction to anti-establishment/capitalism rant, Phil practically rolling his eyes 13:43 “Okay, this is like, stop trying so hard to prove how cool and critical your opinions are, Brah. God. Jesus.”- Dan
14:30 Blue raspberry slushies are dangerous 14:40 Dan would have cried about MCR merch being ruined 14:48 And would still wear it 15:05 Yeah, Dan we all know what it’s trying to parody. 15:10 Both of them would rather go to Bed, Bath & Beyond (domestic <3) 15:23 “Don’t think that way Dilddy, you’re valid.”- Dan
15:35 “Guess the name. Vincent.”- Dan “Dracula.”- Phil “Just straight up Dracula.”- Dan cracking up 16:05 Dan is highly amused by “Edwardian dressage” 16:10 Phil looks done, admits “I’m not sure I’m going to date this one.” 16:28 “Not carrier pigeon? Wow, this guy is not carrying it through.”- Dan 16:30 Phil is liking his nail varnish 16:40 “All I know is that he’s way too high maintenance for me and I’m noping out of there.”- Dan (I like how in this case both Dan and Phil seem to be speaking as themselves not wanting to date Damien, not speaking about what’s right for Dilddy) 17:30 They are both “intrigued, but not at all interested.”
17:44 D&P would watch “Long Haul Paranormal Ice Road Ghost Truckers” 18:26 “Hop on the Reddits and down vote some comments.”- Dan 18:38 “Wow, productive day for Dilddy there, not.”- wow Dan 18:46 When did Dan start with the snorting? I feel like this is a somewhat recent development. 19:09 Furniture assembling is all about interpretation 19:16 “Dilddy continues to be the most relatable character ever.”- Seriously Dan, hush, you have no room to talk. 19:22 A few seconds later: “Yeah, its honest”
20:07 “They’ve got some punch going on, wieners, chairs, plants and lots of cakes. This is a damn good cookout if you ask me.”- Dan 20:25 Dan thinks Joesph sounds like Viktor from Yuri on Ice. 20:52 “Ohh, okay, can’t be a home wrecker then.”- Dan 21:19 “Wow Mary.”- Phil, dragging her 20:20 “I *love* her, literal goals.”- Dan 21:33 “All the guys!”- Dan doing a weird arm flap thing “Ohhh, there’s more guys”- Phil
21:40 Dan loosing total composure over Robert. 21:45 Rugged (edgy) vs rustic (like Amish, ok Dan) 21:50 “Why does he need the whisky, what does he want to do with the eyes? Fuck!“- Dan 22:00 Phil predicts that Dilddy and Robert are not going to get along 22:15 “He’s a bundle of laughs.”- Phil no likee, Dan likee very much
22:40 Phil’s whiny dad voice is a marvel 22:46 “Pleasantries!”- both 22:58 “Wow Amanda.”- Phil 23:06 “It’s Mat! He’s my fave!”- Phil 23:10 “What a cool guy and mysterious.”- Dan about Robert 23:14 “Boo.”- Dan at Brian, mumbles something about dog 23:18 “Edwardian!”- Dan about Damien 23:21 “Hella awkward.”- Dan about Hugo 23:28 “What a coincidence!” (that all the dads live on their cul-de-sac) 23:40 “Mysterious stranger and guy that was too boastful, that doesn’t seem like a good combination, I do want to get to know the mysterious guy more, but I kinda want to avoid Brian.”- Gee Dan, we can tell. 23:51 “Teacher- awkward, Mat- nice, Craig”- Dan, “We like Craig”- Phil
24:02 Look at that diverse group of hot dads! 24:08 “He needs help. Let’s go rescue Craig, that’s definitely what this is.”- Dan 24:16 “Oh my god, Hugo. Stop.”- Phil looking pained 24:36 “Like a Labrador.”- Dan (second Labrador mention this week) 24:44 Craig calls River “little bro” so Dan uses male pronoun only to find out seconds later River is a girl. “Poor baby.” 25:02 Hand quotes abound 25:11 Dan whispers “What the fuck does that mean?” He really wants to know the details of their college relationship 25:20 Daniel James Howell burnt pasta because he didn’t know he had to put water in it. Shame him.
25:50 Dan tells Phil to make Mat’s daughter sound a bit more cool 25:55 “Coot!” “Coot!” 26:00 “Mat is just too cute”- Dan (I thought for sure he was going to say too cool) 26:02 “Dreamboat”- Phil (Dan seems a bit surprised by Phil’s sudden statement) 26:06 “Delet”- Dan who is being slowly won over 26:20 Carmensita is such “an amazingly cool name” 26:23 “Fuck off Daisy. No one likes you Daisy.”- I swear to god, pausing during Dan’s outbursts reveal the best Phil faces 27:03 “Smoooking”- Dan lip shake thing 27:18 Can anyone make out what Dan says about Craig and Mat here? “There’s a… those two.”?
27:40 “Wow. Incredible.”- D “What a delinquent.”- P “Seriously.”- D 27:48 “I mean if you give him a name like Ernest he’s gonna rebel.”- Dan 27:53 “Shout out to any Ernests watching.”- Phil 28:10 Props to Phil for his moody teenage boy voice 28:20 “Woah, edge detected!”- Dan 28:28 What the heck was that Dan? 28:55 Dan thinks Dilddy is cool for not being pretentious 28:56 Dan would be friends with someone who says they’re “cool as a cucumber” 29:58 “From my experience, the moment you stop living with your parents you suddenly are like ‘I love my family!’ but maybe that’s just because you’re used to there being food in the house, and not having to do your own laundry.”- okay Dan, don’t ruin a nice thing. 30:40 “Diddly P!”
30:45 Phil asks Dan if he’s liking Damien’s aesthetic, Dan: “no”. 32:00 Damien Bloodmarch “too much” 32:20 “Wow. Smooth. He’s definitely a vampire.”- Phil 32:30 “Hello Amanda.”- in unison “We should do it at the same time.”- you just did Dan 32:53 “Can we all be Mary?”- Dan (with her wine goals) 33:37 Dan bangs the desk “Everything’s connected!” (Lucien and Damien) 33:45 “Fight! Fight! Fight!”- Dan 34:18 “Joesph is so wholesome, when he isn’t passively aggressively correcting his wife. It’s a facade”- Dan 34:30 “Edge detected!”- Dan 35:03 “The Satan number.”- Phil
35:47 “The Game of Thrones.”- Phil “Yeah sure, it better be”- Dan 35:55 Just going to call him Diddly 37:30 “Wow. I kind of like this. It’s like me, just constant, like joking, then double joking, then triple joking and then everyone’s like ‘wow, do you have a personality or are you just hiding it until layers of humor as a defense mechanism?’”- Dan (wow that went deep) 37:45 “It’s okay Dan.”- Phil, “I’m just kidding.”- Dan 39:39 “Ginger representation.”- Dan (not sure what that has to do with anything but they’re warming up to Brian 40:40 Phil loves the puns, Dan wants them to stop. Clearly Phil was meant to be the dad.
43:03 Dan is into the cauliflower, he will eat the cauliflower, he’s just putting that out there (he also put out a negative opinion on cucumbers not long ago I believe. What does it mean?) 44:00 Wine and Dine Mastermind sounds like something they’d watch 44:33 “Kiddo” reminds Dan of Sans 44:50 “Definitely” earned that ice cream sandwich 45:07 Dan helping Phil with assuaging and exacerbating 45:45 Phil’s dad performance kills me from here on 46:16 “Don’t complain about the attitude. If you want to be protective stick to the issue. So you could say I have a right to be concerned but is that a bit entitled?”- Dan, “I think just like I was scared.”- Phil “It shows vulnerability. That’s how to do it.”- Dan (very wise, what good dads, now good luck keeping a level head when you are actually upset) 46:46 “Say sorry Amanda.”- Phil 46:56 Paused here, D&P’s facial and body language accurately reflect how I feel about what Phil just said about his bedroom. Both their eyes move away from each other and they look tired.
47:22 Phil’s least favorite is Hugo, “He’s so stuffy. I mean intelligence can be attractive but I think when he’s just uhbuhburhburhbuhbahbah”- how’d that go again Phil?
47:30 “He’s got that walrus mustache.”- Dan
47:36 Phil is liking Mat: made banana bread, funny, sensitive and Craig: friend from college, quite funny, and doesn’t really fit in with the snarffle snarffle something
47:47 Dan likes the tall dark mysterious stranger (“Really?” asks Phil surprised, like it wasn’t obvious) cracking inappropriate jokes is literally himself, thinks the darkness might be a pretense and that he could be really soft and vulnerable on the inside “WHO KNOWS?!” Hmmm.
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