#accidentally became less squicked by sansan

[hollowwhisperings]

ASOIAF ships & canonical ages + context (edited with corrections): Starks & Friends Edition.

GENERATION MARTYR

NedCat wed in 282 AC, aged 19 & 18. They were nearing their 17th wedding anniversary prior to Lannister Intervention. Catelyn had never seen Ned prior to their wedding (though the same is not said of him).

NedBert: Ned & Robert fostered together in the Vale, at ages 8 & 9 respectively. Ned lived in the Vale until he was 16, thereafter splitting his time between it & Winterfell. Funnily enough, both are of age with brothers of the other: Robert & Brandon both born in 282 AC, Ned & Stannis the year after (though Stannis is dated as being born in 284, not 283).

Cat/Uncle Brandon: Catelyn was betrothed at 12 to Brandon Stark (14~16). They met several times, including in 282 AC when she was 18 & he 20.

At the Tourney of Harrenhal in 281 AC, Brandon Stark was 19, Ned was 18, Lyanna 15, & Benjen 14.

Howland Reed was 21~24 at the Harrenhal Tourney in 281 AC & Ashara Dayne was 21 or in her late teens¹.

STARKLINGS

Robb/Jeyne Westerling: King Robb wed his one-night stand in 299AC, both of them 16-ish.

Roslin Frey was 16/17 when betrothed first to King Robb & then to his uncle Edmure. Edmure Tully was 24~35 at the Red Wedding.

Robb/Margaery Tyrell: Queen Marge is almost 17 & (had he lived) Robb would be too.

Robb/Dany: the 16-year old Queen-by-Conquest was born scantly a year later than the Young Wolf.

Robb/Arianne Martell: Princess Arianne is 7 years Robb's senior, currently 23/24.

Throbb: Theon was 10 when Lord Stark brought his War home with him (again). Robb & Jon were about 6, Sansa 2, & Arya newly born.

Robb/Dacey Mormont: Dacey was Lady Mormont's eldest daughter, her age estimated as being [22~48] when killed in 299 AC alongside her 16-year old King.

Robb/Myrcella: Princess Myrcella was 6~8 years old when she met the Starklings at Winterfell. She was soon smitten with Robb, then-14 & probably oblivious.

Sansa/Joffrey: Joffrey and Sansa were of an age with each other, being 12 & 11 respectively when first betrothed. Sansa was soon besotted [with the idea of Joffrey], despite earlier being smitten that same year with the youngest son of Lord Yohn Royce (Waymar, on his way to join the Night's Watch & Killed By Prologue).

Sansa/Willas Tyrell: when Margaery spoke of betrothing Sansa to her eldest brother, Sansa was 12 & Willas 21~25. Ser Loras Tyrell, whom Sansa had a crush on, was closer in age at 16 or so.

Sansa/Margaery Tyrell: they met when Sansa was 12, Margaery 15/16.

Sansa & Tyrion Lannister: the two were forcibly wed, she was 12 & he was 25. Tyrion was first wed at 13, eloping with the equally 13 & besotted "Tysha" & living with her for two weeks. There are Differences between these two marriages that should be Obvious.

Sansa & Robert Arryn: the cousins were betrothed by Lady Lysa but Lord Baelish swiftly prevented such a match² by claiming Sansa as "his bastard daughter". Despite this, 8-year old Robert has both proposed to & kissed "Alayne" (who is 13, not 14).

Sansa/Harrold Hardyng: "Alayne" & Harry the Heir have been betrothed in TWoW, aged "14" & ~19 respectively³.

Sansa/"Aegon Targaryen": Sansa is currently 13 & the son of Princess Elia by Rhaegar Targaryen would be 18 in 300 AC.

JonSa: 17 & 13. Jon has technically "known" Sansa since Lady Catelyn was pregnant with her, the two "meeting" soon after Sansa's birth. They grew up together but at a greater distance than the other Starklings, Sansa following her Lady Mother's example with Jon & Theon both.

"Lemoncakes": Dany is currently 16 & Sansa is 13.

Sansa/Margaery: they became friends at ages 12 & ~16. They will be 14 & 17 by the end of 300 AC.

SanSan: Sandor Clegans met Sansa when she was 11, during his time as Prince Joffrey's "dog". Sandor was 27/28 at the time. In her time as a Lannister hostage, Sandor (& the absent Ser Jaime) was the only Kingsguard who never beat her and he protected her when he could. Sandor, when drunk or strongly emotional, found himself [enamoured] with Sansa (or, at least, what she Represented) but never acted on this as Literally Everyone Else did & continue to do. Sandor called Sansa "Little Bird" and so reminded himself that, Maiden Fair she may be, she was but a child⁴.

Petyr Baelish is currently 31/32. He has been obsessed with Lady Catelyn Tully since their shared childhood, where Catelyn was the most senior in their playgroup (4-5 years his elder). In 12-year old Sansa, Petyr deluded himself in thinking he could have both the woman who [rejected him] & "their" child together. He actively attempts to court his step-niece & parent her, sometimes at the same time.

Theon/Sansa: Theon was 10 when he first met Sansa, aged 2. He is now 22 & she 13. In his early years as Ned Stark's "ward", Theon dreamed that he would be adopted into the Stark family by marrying Sansa.

Sansa/Podrick Payne: both will turn 14 in 300 AC (assuming Podrick survived his encounter with Sansa's Mother). They have never met.

Sansa & Jeyne Poole have been close friends throughout their shared childhood at Winterfell. They are only a year apart, being 13 & 14 respectively. Sansa is unaware of the role Lord Baelish had in Jeyne (& their younger friend Beth Cassel)'s "Disappearing".

Mya Stone is King Robert Baratheon's eldest known bastard at 19. Lady Myranda Royce is ? They both believe Alayne Stone is 14.

Gendrya: Gendry met the boy he soon guessed was a girl when he was ~14 & she 9/10. Gendry's "abandonment" of Arya (to be a knight in the Brotherhood Without Banners) was the last loss that prompted Arya's flight from Westeros. Gendry is the (oblivious) eldest son of King Robert who yet lives. He will soon be 16 & has somehow remained ignorant of his heritage despite meeting his father at least twice, being separately inspected by two Lord Hands, being idly propositioned by his half-sister Bella Rivers (fortunately rejected) as she explained her name & parentage, and being mistaken as Renly Baratheon (Robert's very visually similar younger brother) by Brienne of Tarth. In Gendry's defense, Arya seemed oblivious too & had more "clues" available to her.

Arya/"Hot Pie": Hot Pie was the only other friend of Arya who, along with she & Gendry, survived their entire escape from King's Landing (Weasel's Fate is Unknown). Hot Pie "abandoned" Arya before Gendry, staying on at a crossroads inn as a baker. His age (& actual name) are unknown: it can possibly be assumed that he is closer to Arya in age than Gendry, perhaps 9~13.

Arya/Edric Storm: currently 11 & 13, respectively. They have never actually met.

Arya/Ned Dayne: they met when Ned was 12 & Arya 10. Little Ned Dayne was last seen squiring with a recently rekilled Ser Beric Dondarrion. Arya's mislike of Ned Dayne's beliefs on his namesake, Arya's Father, having loved a woman other than Arya's Mother inspired Arya to mimic the same prejudices against Dornishmen held by many of her most hated enemies (Tywin & Cersei Lannister, to name 2).

Arya/Dany: Arya is now 11 & Queen Daenerys 16.

BranJen: when Jojen first met the "winged wolf" of his Dreams, said Wolf was about 8 years old. Jojen was 12/13.

Bran/Meera Reed: 9-year old Bran currently believes himself in love with the 17-year old Meera Reed, the only human female in shared geography. Meera is more concerned with her little brother's declining mental health.

Bran/Shireen Baratheon: Shireen is of age with Arya, making her some 2 years senior to Bran.

Rickon/Shireen: Rickon is 4, Shireen is 11.

WARDS OF WINTERFELL

Jon Snow/Ygritte: their torrid affair began when Jon was 16 & Ygritte 18-ish.

Jonerys: Jon died aged 17. Dany is currently 16.

Jon/Tormund: Tormund's age is unspecified but, given that he has at least 4 fighting-aged sons & at least 1 contentedly married daughter... even assuming his sons were born to different mothers, Tormund could be no younger than his mid-30's & is more probably in his 40's.

Jon/Val "the Wildling Princess": Val could be anywhere between her late teens to her early 30's. She is, at least, closer in age to Jon than Melissandre.

JonSatin: just two teens, scandalizing what little polite society exists at The Wall by being Lord Commander & the Steward-and-Squire thereof. Satin describes himself as "18": Jon describes Satin as "pretty [like a girl]".

Jon/Samwell Tarly: these best-friends are of age with each other, both born in 283 AC.

Sam/Gilly: 17 & 16-18, as of 300 AC.

Thramsay: Theon is 22 & Ramsay is at least 18.

Theon/Jeyne Poole: they are 22 & 14, as of TWoW.

Walder of Winterfell/Meera Reed: "Hodor" is no younger than 17, being Meera's own age or older.

OATHKEEPERS

Ser Jaime Lannister met Ned Stark when they were 17 & 19, respectively. Ned entered the Red Keep's great hall and found Ser Jaime sat upon the Iron Throne, Aerys II's corpse between them. It was the "Honourable" Ned Stark's disapproval of him that wounded Jaime "first" & most bitterly upon his becoming "the Kingslayer" [of a Mad King].

Brienne was 18 when she swore her sword to the widowed Lady Catelyn (~35).

Braime: Jaime was ~32 & Brienne 18 when they first met. She will be turning 20 in 300 AC & he 34.

Jaime/Lysa Tully: the two were nearly betrothed in their early teens (they were born in the same year or Lysa within the 2 years after). When Jaime was sent from his squiring at Crake Hall to "deliver an important message" to Riverrun, however, he had greater interest in Lysa's Great-Uncle Brynden than in Lysa herself.

Ser Brynden "the Blackfish" Tully would have been in his 20's when a 12~14 year old Jaime met him & thought him a Hero. The Blackfish is estimated to now be 44~47 & he alone escaped Ser Jaime's breaking the Siege of Riverrun.

Jaime & Lyanna Stark were another hypothetical match, in their youth, also being of age with each other. The only opportunity either Lannister twin had to meet Lyanna was when all three were 15 & at Harrenhal. Both Lannisters were sent away prior to the Tourney proper, however, to separate destinations though [Lyanna] was mistaken for Jaime during [her] stint as "Knight of the Laughing Tree"... prompting Prince Rhaegar's Search for the Mystery Knight at his Father's Paranoid Demands & his instead finding Lyanna.

Ser Arthur Dayne knighted Jaime when the latter was 15. Arthur was no younger than 21 at the time, his exact age is unspecified.

Prince Rhaegar was ~23 when he left a 17-year old Jaime as the sole protector of his wife & small children: they & Jaime were all hostages, afterall (though Rhaegar only admitted to Jaime's being one).

Princess Elia would have been 24~26 (& pregnant) when she met Ser Jaime as a newly appointed Kingsguard. They had met years earlier, when Jaime was 7 or so, when the Ruling Princess of Dorne took her teenaged daughter & son to Casterly Rock.

Prince Oberyn joined his mother & sister in their Tour of Westeros, likely expecting to be betrothed to the late Joanna Lannister's only daughter. They met again, both of them grown men (Oberyn ~41 & Jaime ~32), upon Brienne's returning Ser Jaime to King's Landing.

Jaime/Addam Marbrand: Addam is possibly Jaime's best friend, having first befriended each other as children while Addam was a page at Casterly Rock. They are likely of age with each other, give or take a few years, putting Addam in his early 30's.

Jaime/Ser Ilyn Payne: Ilyn has become Jaime's preferred "confidant", after his estrangement with his siblings & his sending Brienne on [their] quest. This is due to Ser Ilyn's inability to break Jaime's confidence, being both illiterate & without his tongue. Thusly is Ilyn able to safekeep Jaime's new clumsiness with a sword & his Relations with his sister (willingly or otherwise). Ser Ilyn is in his late 30's, at minimum⁵, more probably in his 40's & possibly even his mid-50's.

Footnotes

¹Ashara being any younger than 16 in 281 AC makes it ??? that anyone could believe her the mother of "Ned's Bastard": it would also make it really, really weird that a then-45 year old Barristan Selmy would think himself in love with her. Assuming her death was faked, Ashara would be 35~40 as of 300 AC.

²Lysa suggested the betrothal but Petyr prevented it by claiming Sansa as "his bastard daughter" (& thus "unsuited" for Lord Arryn). Petyr's "protecting" Sansa "incidentally" prevented Sansa from gaining genuine allies as her cousin's betrothed or in her own right as "Ned Stark & Catelyn Tully's daughter".

Lady Catelyn was, of course, kin to Lady Lysa: she was also the niece of the Blackfish & had been the Lady of Winterfell, a trusted ally from a neighbouring kingdom, for nearing 2 decades.

Ned Stark, meanwhile, would be well-remembered by the Vale not only as Warden of the North but for his fostering in the Vale from age 8 to 16 (oft visiting it thereafter): many of the Lords in the Vale saw Ned grow up as their Lord's surrogate son, others growing up alongside him.

When Ned called for aid, his House thrice-betrayed by its King & with yet more being demanded from him, as King Aerys II demanded the heads of his foster-father & brother too? The Vale followed their Lord & Ned Stark to war gladly, certain of the justice in his cause.

Lady Lysa's keeping the Vale from aiding Ned's son against the Crown, in circumstances all too similar to his Lord Father's before him (both his sisters "taken", his brother [nearly] murdered, his father wrongfully executed: his remaining family at threat)? The Vale Lords were displeased, Lady Lysa's decision controversial to her vassals. Lysa's own Uncle, the Vale's Knight of the Bloody Gate, resigned his post in protest of this order (though not for any love of Ned, whom he misliked for the existence of Jon Snow): the Tully Words name "Family" before all else.

It should additionally be noted that Houses Waynwood, Corbray & Templeton may all boast a Stark ancestress: Ned's Great-Aunt Jocelyn wed a Ser Royce, their three daughters marrying into those three Vale Houses. The current heads of these Houses all signed on as Lords Declarant, protesting the Regency assumed by Petyr Baelish.

Lord Yohn Royce, leader of these Lords Declarant, was friendly with Ned & likely fought alongside him in war: he had sparred with Lord Stark in his visit to Winterfell, not too long prior to AGOT, as he took his youngest son to serve at The Wall.

If the Vale Lords had known Sansa's true identity, she would have easily found support: she may well have "gained" loyalty simply for her Name & Circumstances, no betrothal to her young cousin required.

For Petyr's "hiding" of Sansa, the Knights of the Vale did not aid Riverrun as it was besieged nor when its Tully Lord was taken captive to Casterly Rock. For Petyr's "stalling" in revealing Sansa's identity, an 11-year old Arya Stark believed herself entirely alone in Westeros and so abandoned it. For Petyr's Lies, Sansa's entire family was separated from AGOT & into TWoW: Sansa's greatest danger in the Vale has ever been Petyr Baelish, as much as he claims otherwise.

³This post was revised in August '23 due to Errors regarding Sansa & Harrold Hardyng: I had mistaken the age of "Alayne" as being true of Sansa too. Littlefinger aged Sansa up for his own purposes. The accidental aging up of Harrold Hardyng by a decade was, however, mine own fault. Sorry, Harry!

⁴Sansa misremembers her last meeting with Sandor Clegane as ending with a kiss: in troth, Sandor bade her to sing him a song at knifepoint & she held his wounded cheek (seemingly prompted by seeing him cry). There were several instances where Sandor threatened or otherwise implied Sansa with Harm but, given her treatment by most everyone else, Sandor's never acting on such words or thoughts made him a hero to Sansa ever after (mostly After).

⁵Tyrion notes being "too young" to remember a Ser Ilyn who could Speak. Cersei, Renly & Joffrey date Ser Ilyn's Silencing as taking place "14 years" ago. Ser Ilyn Payne was an active knight in service to Aerys II, his tongue cut during the reign of Tywin Lannister as Lord Hand. That makes Ser Ilyn at least 18-or-so in 2