#about how every writing decision you made was actually super smart and deep and totally worth it

[toastedsmoreo]

I gotta be less terminally online bc every time I think about jjk’s ending I get annoyed

[laureviewer]

Persona 5 Royal: A Review

It’s finally time to review one of my all-time favourite games.

I first played Persona 5 around 3 years ago, and I’ve really grown since then in a few ways. A few thoughts before I begin: a) since my first playthrough, JRPGs have cemented themselves as one of my favourite types of games; b) I don’t hate all turn-based RPGs except Pokémon anymore!; c) after my first playthrough I went to Japan, and as Persona 5 is set in Tokyo, playing Royal was a lot of fun as I knew a lot of the locations, which meant I could dive into the setting deeper than the first time; and d) my 250 hours of playtime in total across both playthroughs can most likely be attributed to the incredible writing and masterful character development.

Warning: HEAVY story spoilers

I’m not trying to sell you a game. I want to give you an in-depth analysis of the story, characters, gameplay and all other aspects of this brilliant game, spoilers and all. I want a discussion. So, dive in and see what I really thought, no holds barred.

The Silence is Deafening

‘…’ – a direct quote from our protagonist, there. Our silent hero, codename Joker, is a victim of circumstance. Wrongfully accused of assault by a mysterious man who is angered that a kid prevented him from forcing a woman into his car et al., he must move away from his hometown to wait out his probation period and live a normal student life. Why must he live above a failing café under the guardianship of the cranky owner? Not to mention: why is he banished to Tokyo of all places, somewhere very likely much more exciting than wherever his hometown is?

Either way, Joker isn’t going to tell you. He’s quiet and lets the other many, many other characters do the talking for him—a usual trope of JRPGs, but it is still an issue as he is also put on a pedestal as an incredibly special, talented, empathetic and all-round great guy. He’s the only one capable of saving the world, as he has abilities no-one else has, for some reason.

But this isn’t as bad as I’m making it out to be. Sure, it doesn’t really make sense why you have such a huge following when you don’t have much of a personality, but that’s the beauty of the silent protagonist. You, the player, are the protagonist. The fact that you can even put your own name in as his name is telling. You make the decisions, you make the friends, and you carve out your own destiny from the choices you make. It’s always these kinds of games that, when I talk to my friends, I say ‘I messed up with Sojiro’ or ‘I went to the arcade today’—and it is me. Because even though I’m not a woefully silent Japanese male teenager with glasses, for the time I’m playing Persona 5, I am.

So, you are the protagonist. You learn that there are mental shutdowns all over Tokyo, making people go crazy and kill lots of people, such as a conductor crashing his train, or simply killing people on the spot. It’s weird, but what can you do? You’re just a student with his own problems: not only do many of the students avoid you because you are a delinquent, but the volleyball coach, Kamoshida, seems to be harassing students, from the ones on his team who seem terrified of him, to girls that are being hit on. When a strange app appears on your phone, you accidentally find yourself in the metaverse, along with Ryuji, who also has a good reason to get revenge on Kamoshida.

I Am Thou, Thou Art I

What teenager doesn’t have a rebellious self hidden deep within their subconscious? Well, these teens can utilise that hidden self past its usual constraints to overcome the crappy adults that suppress them and make detrimental decisions for them. Once Joker and Ryuji, and later many other young adults, realise this potential and recognise that these adults need to be stopped, they are awakened to their Personas. A Persona is a manifestation of a persona user’s personality, which the individual can use to face hardship and overcome injustice, even if just in the Metaverse, the collective unconscious world.

But, really, there’s no ‘just’ about it. Here in this world, which take the form of Palaces, the Phantom Thieves (you and your friends) can defeat the ruler of the Palace (the adult with a distorted desire) to convince them to change their heart. In this way, the ‘real’ them in the real world will atone for their actions and justice can be served. So, really, your actions are vital to solving crimes, dealing justice and, eventually, saving the world.

These Personas are like Pokémon for adults. You are special, as you can catch and wield multiple Personas, allowing you to have a whole array of powers, but your friends have one that they train and evolve throughout the course of the story. Catching them is a skill: you have to learn their weakness, and use a skill that takes advantage of it to ‘down’ the Persona. This gives you a chance to either: perform an ‘all out’ attack which sees all your allies fight them at once for increased damage; ask them for money or an item; or negotiate with them to convince them to become a part of you (and thus catch them for use later). This gets harder when there are multiple different Personas to battle at once, all with different weaknesses and strengths that means you must time your combat precisely to ‘down’ them at the same time.

Personas are one of the best parts of the game, as you can see.

Not happy with a persona’s moves, or you want to create stronger ones? Go to the Velvet Room, where Igor and the Twin Wardens Justine and Caroline will fuse two or more Personas together to create new ones.

This is where the Pokémon element is better and worse. You can get completely new and stronger Personas immediately, which is cool, but if you are particularly drawn to one it doesn’t make sense to keep using them as they will level up far quicker if you fuse them than if you keep them. I struggled with this at first, as Arsene is your first ‘official’ Persona, and I couldn’t quite believe you are only meant to have him for the first few hours. It’s like Ash giving up Pikachu after defeating Brock!

Also, have you seen how you have to fuse them? It’s so dark and unnecessarily vivid! You have to guillotine, electric chair or hang them in order to create these new Personas, which is so different to Persona 4 where the Personas are cards, making it less gruesome to get rid of your companions. It definitely made me feel bad for fusing them, but that didn’t stop me!

Essentially, the Persona franchise wouldn’t be the same without all the incredible Personas you fight and capture along the way. It really encapsulates what the games are like: stylized and deeply considered, exuding character and imagination throughout.

Take Over, It’s Time to Put You Down

Using these Personas are a lot of fun, too. The moves are elemental as well as physical, they can inflict ailments such as ‘sleep’ and ‘fear’, and evolve as you and your Personas level up. Personas all have strengths and weaknesses, and by fusing them, you can create Personas with stronger moves and resistances that, as you get towards the end of the game, means that you can fuse some incredibly powerful Personas that can fight any and all enemies, if you’re smart with the moves you inherit.

This all sounds very similar to Pokémon, right? Well, there are other more showy, fantastically fun elements that integrate beautifully with the stunning graphics to make every battle (which have the potential to become very repetitive) exciting and challenging. When a character manages to ‘down’ an enemy by using a move that is strong against it, they can either do another attack or choose to Baton Pass to an ally, chaining super-effective attacks to down multiple enemies in one round, which is useful if there are a lot of different enemies with different affinities and weaknesses. Then, once all enemies are downed, all allies can come together for an All Out Attack for an extra boost of damage.

As much as this is useful for the player, if the enemy downs one of your allies, they can also do a secondary attack, which means that they have the potential to wipe out your team very quickly. Plus, some moves are one hit kills, which may have low accuracy but is still extremely frustrating sometimes, particularly in regular 5 where I found the combat more challenging. The worst boss fight was Haru’s dad, where I actually had to change difficulty for the only time throughout the game—who decided it was a good idea to revive the robot shadows if you didn’t kill them in three moves?!

The Showtime moves, new for Royal, bring a fresh new element to the game. As you progress through the story, your allies start forming bonds, which will then be reflected in combat. At seemingly random times, they can join up with fantastic new animations (such as Yusuke cooking Ryuji some yummy food at a bar, who get interrupted by a shadow coming in the door, and they both take it out) and inflict massive damage. I was sad that Joker doesn’t get one, until the Royal section where baes Akechi and Sumire both team up with you respectively for new Showtimes. It made me wonder whether Joker just wasn’t as close to the rest of the team as he becomes to Akechi and Sumire, which actually also made me glad that I focused on both of them heavily in my playthrough!

Every song that plays throughout the game, including combat, is a banger, so even though my husband got annoyed hearing it coming out of my TV for 120 hours, this soundtrack will remain one of my favourites to date. Overall, the combat is great, and thankfully not too repetitive after so many hours of gameplay.

Adulting is Hard

The story of Persona 5 is deeply gripping, and keeps you invested and interested the whole way through. It didn’t absolutely destroy me like other JRPGs have done (see: Final Fantasy XV), but fun, emotive and has huge repercussions if you don’t succeed in your mission, including people dying and the world ending. No pressure, then.

Your actions, then, are crucial to making the world a better place: and the villains that you encounter are integral to succeeding. In true revolution fashion, it’s the kids that need to stand up to the adults to rid them of their distorted desires—but it’s not all random. The adults are truly abhorrent (the first one, Kamoshida, sexually assaults female students and physically abuses members of his volleyball team) and they continue a running thread from first to last—that is, the ones who you think aren’t connected at all seem to be connected to the final villain by the end. It’s very clever, and kept me gripped the whole way through—something that’s needed with 80+ hours of gameplay.

The writing is absolutely fantastic. All characters have their own distinct mannerisms, personalities and stories, which you get to explore with the Confidant mechanic (see below). The voice acting is great, and as I progressed through the Confidants, I really started to feel like they were becoming my friends, and that every time I turned on my PS4 I was hanging out with my pals again. It’s the way games should make you feel—like you actually care about what will happen to them.

This does make the game quite stressful (in a good way), as what you do has actual repercussions. It’s a bit frustrating sometimes that some of your dialogue doesn’t affect the game at large, as well as your romance choices. None of the characters acknowledge you have a girlfriend, and if you date Ann, for example, she won’t act any differently than if you decide to not even become her friend. While that’s disappointing, other dialogue choices can completely affect your game so that you always have to be very careful with your decisions. Will you get the ‘bad’ ending, where you fail to stop the final villain; the ‘good bad’ ending, where you accept his distorted view of the world; or the ‘true’ canon ending, where you revert the world to normal? A lot of choices throughout this lengthy game affect what ultimately happens, so you do feel like you’re affecting the story a lot more than, say, Pokémon. In fact, in Royal, you can even miss out on a whole section of the game…

Ascending to Royalty

As long as you max your Confidant links with Akechi (the renegade teen detective), Kasumi (the new gymnast freshman at your school) and Maruki (the school counsellor), you get to experience the 30+ hours that Royal adds to Persona 5. And—major spoilers here—once you’ve defeated the God of Control and exposed Akechi for the unhinged betrayer that he is, you should go to juvenile detention and your ability to use Personas should be gone for good, as Momentos has been destroyed.

However, in Royal, Maruki has figured out how to use cognitive psience—and you’re the reason why. His sessions with you has helped with his research, and so now he can make the world a better place by granting everyone’s desires in the collective unconsciousness.

As you can see by his actions, he’s not your typical antagonist. His heart is completely in the right place: he wants to make everyone happy by granting their desires for them, such as bringing back Futaba’s dead mother and helping Ryuji recover so he can get back on the track team. I resonated with that, and actually wondered whether it would be worse for certain characters, particularly Futaba and Haru who get to spend time with their respective dead parents, to reject the “blissful ignorance” reality that Maruki had created for them in favour of the truth.

By this point, I had grown rather fond of the deranged but entertaining firework that Akechi has revealed himself to be, and once I learned that Akechi would die (as he did in regular 5) if Maruki’s reality were to be revoked, I almost chose to accept it. But Akechi being adamant that he was going to stop Maruki no matter what as he didn’t want to live under anyone else’s rule helped make that choice for me. It was difficult, though. Akechi’s is a motive that is simultaneously selfish and noble: selfish as he doesn’t want anyone else to control him, even if that means other people are happy, but noble because he values the truth above all else. Plus, the fact that he was one of the main villains throughout the story up until this point made me question whether we should continue to trust him, even though he had decided to help us, even if it were primarily for his own gain. I think my fondness for him (perhaps because he is a fully-fledged Confidant in this game, unlike regular 5) and the wildcard elements he brought to the game made me feel a certain brand of loyalty towards him, and so I chose to honour his “dying wish”. And, of course, this path led to the ‘true’ ending!

This indecision is shown most clearly in Maruki’s palace, where you have to deduce what decisions in certain situations Maruki would think is the ‘right’ one. It really helps you understand where he’s coming from. For example, his question ‘if your friend is being attacked, and you don’t have much time before they get seriously hurt, would you a) run to get help but you might not make it back in time, or b) join the fight to help but you might get hurt yourself?’ Neither answer is necessarily wrong, but b) is correct as Maruki simply wants you to look out for yourself over others. The crux of his viewpoint is that you should endeavour to make yourself happy or safe, even if that means others may not be. It’s a very interesting conundrum, and one I enjoyed debating philosophically whilst playing.

The concept of right and wrong and mental health was also tackled in this game through Kasumi/Sumire. Ultimately, even though Maruki wanted to help her by allowing Sumire to pretend to be her dead sister, as she blames herself for her death, he ultimately did her more harm than good. With the support of Joker and the others Sumire was able to overcome her delusions and grow into a strong, confident young woman. This cemented for me how backwards Maruki was and that reality is the most important thing, even if it’s not always what we want, because that’s life. In this way, I feel that Royal added something to 5. Even though going into someone’s mind palace was about mental health, I never really considered it until Royal dealt with an innocent traumatised girl and a misguided man attempting to heal her. I applaud Atlas for tackling something so difficult pretty well.

Confident in my Confidants

It’s a good thing the player can really get into the story, because it’s heavily dependent on personal decisions and making friends.

In order to get stronger within the Metaverse, Igor, the man inside the Velvet Room, tells Joker that he needs to strengthen the relationship with his friends first. This is absolutely true—not just with your teammates, but with other individuals who live in Tokyo too, in the form of the Confidant mechanic. For example, while your teammates all get skills such as curing afflictions and taking fatal hits for Joker, others give just as much if not more valuable perks, such as Kawakami giving you more free time or Mishima allowing all teammates to gain experience even if they don’t contribute to the battle once you max them out.

The way you level them up is through socialising. This passes time, but is also incredibly interesting, as each Confidant has a gripping story (except Ohya!). You can’t downgrade a Confidant, but picking the right dialogue choices can make leveling them up much quicker in a game where time is everything. It’s also necessary to level up your stats, such as knowledge, kindness and charm, to allow you to progress with some Confidants and be empathetic or charming enough to deal with the situations thrown at you. I loved the dual play style of dungeon battles and social simulation—in a lengthy game, it broke up gameplay and kept it fresh.

As this was my second playthrough, I already knew that maxing certain Confidants would yield the best results, such as Kawakami and Yoshida who eventually allows you to negotiate with and catch shadows of a higher level than you. But in Royal, the new additions of Counselor, Faith & Justice—Maruki, Kasumi & Akechi—freshened things up. Technically, Justice isn’t new, but you can now hang out with him instead of his progress being facilitated purely by story.

Time to rate my friends from worst to best!

21: Ichiko Ohya Devil Arcana

I found this alcoholic journalist very annoying. Her story isn’t that interesting, she isn’t very nice, and the skills that she gives you to allow you to sneak around Palaces easier aren’t worth it either. I only maxed out her story near the end as I had time, but honestly, she shouldn’t be a priority.

20: Iwai Munehisa Hanged Man Arcana

Didn’t think anything of him until Royal, where I had more time to learn about his time in the Yakusa and his son. Useful for guns (which aren’t even an integral part of combat, really), but other than that I barely used his shop—plus you have to have high Guts in order to progress. Definitely better Confidants out there.

19: Tae Takemi Death Arcana

The fact that this doctor is a sexy goth is probably the best thing about her. You can level her up quite early on, so she is quite exciting at the beginning as she’s one of the only adults you can turn into a Confidant at that point, but after a while she stopped being interesting to me. In my Royal playthrough I found I didn’t need many healing items—SP was far more important!—and in the end I didn’t max her out. A fun outfit, but can leave her.

18: Shinya Oda Tower Arcana

Definitely annoying (but what little brother isn’t?) but there’s a sad reason for that—his mum is emotionally abusive, even if she doesn’t mean to be. In the end I wanted to max him out to save him from that life, but I never quite got that far. At least I managed to change his mum’s heart before I finished the game.

He’s also quite useful in buffing gun attacks and bonuses for downing and negotiating, so definitely useful for combat. I just ended up feeling bad for him, but he was also a bit of a shit, being a bully to his classmates; his big bro Joker helped with that!

17: Hifumi Togo Star Arcana

I never got to know her in my first playthrough, and I didn’t realise how useful she is for battles. She eventually allows you to swap players in combat, hastens escapes, improves money hauls, and allows back-up members to do follow up attacks. I’d definitely give her a shot for just those bonuses, even if you don’t want to romance her—but she is sweet, if very detached from the rest of the story.

16: Chihaya Mifune Fortune Arcana

I maxed her out pretty quickly so I could get the fortune readings; affinity was especially useful, as you can level up Confidants a tiny bit quicker, for a price. And, after she takes 100,000 from you near the beginning (!) and eventually gives it back, she’s lovely. Nothing special, and definitely not one to romance, but nice.

15: Twin Wardens Justine & Caroline Strength Arcana

Their Confidant path was slightly different: you have to show them Personas with specific moves, and they will level up. This was very interesting, and also put a natural brake on their relationship, as some Personas can’t be made until you are a certain level. They are also very useful as you eventually unlock group Persona fusions and can fuse Personas of a higher level than you, for a price. Always fun to get the ridiculous Personas a bit earlier on! Also, their story was super interesting, due to the mystery that surrounds their identities…

Also also, Royal gives a new element to your relationship with them. You can now take them out of the Velvet Room to show them ‘human things’, like aquariums and cinemas. I didn’t utilise this much as you only get skill cards, and no actual level progress, but I wish I had more time, as the dialogue in these sequences is hilarious as they try to understand why humans would do certain things. The fact that I’ve ranked them so low is telling—there are so many fun and useful Confidants that mean they rank this low. 

14: Yuuki Mishima Moon Arcana

I actually think you’re a bit mean to him—he’s definitely your friend, but every time you are asked to clarify this the dialogue choices make you seem like a dickhead when you say he’s only ‘sort of’ your friend! He’s helped you so much, stop being such a dick, player. Plus he helps increase EXP, as well as allows EXP to be given to back-up members so it’s definitely a good thing to max him earlier. Plus, he’s sweet, and gives you Momentos requests. Justice for Mishima!

13: Takuto Maruki Councillor Arcana

Lovely. What a gent. Shame he turned out to be distorted by deciding to change people’s realities by interpreting their vague wants instead of actually asking people if they’d WANT their realities changed or not. Sounds a bit like Thanos to me, but with a better reason to be evil.

The bonuses of Maruki though are: he’s interesting; he’s lovely; and his bonuses are mainly SP based, which is always hard to recover in Persona, especially in the early stages of the games. He raises your SP, gives you a chance to instantly recover ailments, gives you a chance to become focused and therefore raises your attack, and gives you a chance to recover your SP when low. Very useful, and you can’t play the Royal storyline without maxing him out before November 18th anyway.

12: Haru Okumura Empress Arcana

Again, I wasn’t too much of a fan of Haru on my first playthrough (perhaps because she’s quite a late addition to the team), but this time round, I had more time to get to know her. I really wanted to save her from her awful fiancé, and hoped I’d be able to say ‘don’t marry him, marry me!’ if I chose to romance her, but alas. I was also quite surprised with how business-orientated she is, which was a surprise. However, she was just too prim and proper for me, and even after her story showed her to be evolving into a confident woman, she didn’t evolve quite enough for me to be interested.

She’s useful, though, as all the Confidants are who are your team members, so leveling her up is a must, for help in combat and to evolve her Persona.

11: Morgana Magician Arcana

Morgana was the most useful as the support hero—I always wanted him in my party, particularly in hard battles, just to keep me and my allies alive. Plus, who doesn’t love a talking cat? Though, at one point, he does get moody and very annoying. While Morgana as a character was never that exciting past being the initial reason they can become Phantom Thieves and the mystery surrounding where he comes from, Royal switched that up by turning him into a dreamboat with piercing blue eyes when Maruki made his dream of being a human come true. They kept saying throughout this sequence how beautiful he was, which was amusing. A nice twist on the original game.

10: Toranosuke Yoshida Sun Arcana

I learnt to level this fallen-from-grace politician up quickly from my first playthrough as, once you max him out, you can negotiate easier with shadows of your own level, and negotiate with higher level shadows and add them to the compendium—absolutely necessary. Also, he’s basically a massive socialist leftie, so he rocks.

9: Yusuke Kitagawa Emperor Arcana

I didn’t like him much in my first playthrough, but now I appreciate him far more—he’s flamboyant, artistic and, best of all, happy to be in his own mind and be himself, no matter what people think of him. He’s a bit stuck up sometimes, but all in all he’s an outsider who fits in better than he really should. And he provides funny dialogue, particularly when interacting with Futaba. I also love his Showtime moves with Ryuji and Ann.

8: Ann Takamaki Lovers Arcana

I’m quite surprised she’s this low down for me, but even though she’s the first girl you befriend and she’s hopelessly beautiful to everyone who meets her, she doesn’t quite push past the ‘ditzy girl’ trope. The story does try to make her more nuanced, and to an extent it works—she’s also fun, thoughtful and empathetic—but there’s just too many misogynistic and ditsy jokes that even only a few years later don’t land anymore. Saying that, she literally uses her sexuality to break free of the misogyny that surrounds her body and the sexual abuse and prejudice she experiences, at the most from the volleyball teacher, and at the least from everyone around her. It’s a steep hill to climb, but she’s doing it.

I drew the picture below!

7: Sadayo Kawakami Temperance Arcana

Kawakami’s your teacher—what could possibly go wrong? Well, she’s also a sexy maid who comes over to clean up, though she won’t go any further as you’re her high school student. Yet. It’s a bit dodgy, especially as she acts like your mum, but even so, the forbidden fruit angle is fun. Her story is also compelling. Not only is she an interesting Confidant, but one of the most useful ones for the amount of extra time she gives you when you level her up. Why on both my playthroughs did I not level her up immediately?

6: Sojiro Sakura Hierophant Arcana

He’s your guardian who takes you in when you have to move from your hometown after your alleged assault to live out your probation. He starts out cranky, but has an absolute heart of gold. He ended up being one of my favourite Confidants—plus, he’s one of the most useful, as he is one of the only ways to get SP in the early game by making coffee and curry. You need to understand the pride I got from making coffee that met his expectations!

5: Futaba Sakura Hermit Arcana

Sojiro’s adopted daughter is so much fun that I romanced her in the first game. While some may think she’s more like a little sister, she’s just a bit more immature because of her hermit lifestyle and Arcana. She’s funny, loves games, and has great references; she is one of the only instances of a game that has a young girl who doesn’t sound like 40-year-olds trying to sound like teenagers. She has a heartbreaking story, but her personality keeps it light. She says it how it is, no matter what anyone else thinks. She’s great.

4: Kasumi/Sumire Yoshizawa Faith Arcana

I chose to romance the gymnast honour student in Royal, because how can you not romance the new girl? Though I wasn’t sure at first, as I found her quite twee at the beginning. However, she became a lot more nuance when she became Sumire, which is to be expected. Plus, she is really well integrated into the story and really makes you feel she cares about you. She has an amazing costume when she is Codename: Violet, and gives you some truly useful abilities, such as ambushing from a distance and avoiding being surrounded by shadows. She’s a great addition to an already great game.

3: Makoto Niijima Priestess Confidant

She’s bestgirl in terms of smarts, badassery, and simple relatability. She is Student Council President, an honour student, and has been manipulated by evil adults for their own distorted desires. Her parents have died, which instils her with deep guilt for being a burden on her sister. She’s also the only one whose Confidant story doesn’t actively revolve around herself: she changes, but it’s through helping her friend who may be a victim of trafficking rather than her own self-interests. She’s sharp, poised and even more badass when she awakens to her Persona, Johanna—it’s a freaking motorcycle!

2: Ryuji Sakamoto Chariot Confidant

Your best buddy. I’m always drawn towards these ones, who are treated a bit dumb but are loyal to the end. He’s also hilarious, like when he complains the Phantom Thieves are in the shadows and not getting any credit, and I chose the option ‘I like the shade’, he says ‘what are you, moss?!’ I really do wish I could romance him, because I can see a lovely storyline where he’s unsure at first but the fact that they’re soulmates transcends gender.

1: Goro Akechi Justice Confidant

I’m almost hesitant to admit I find him the most fascinating and fun. Not only is he dangerous, exciting and unhinged, he's at the centre of an incredible twist. He’s one of the most interesting characters, and you never know what he’s going to do next. I would definitely date him if Japanese games let gay relationships happen; he has all the best attributes for a crazy romantic relationship. Not IRL, but in a game, why not?

I love that he didn’t die and teams up with you in Royal, and that . He’s also the first character that Joker gets a Showtime move with, which made it quite special. When it is revealed just how evil and crazy he is, his whole character changes, including his Persona, his Phantom Thieves outfit, and his demeanor—it’s scary how excited he is by killing, but at the same time, he is absolutely certain of his viewpoints and won’t compromise for anyone. Many of these points would be a reason why he shouldn’t be my number one, but I can’t help it.

Honourable Mentions: Igor (Fool Arcana), Sae Niijima (Judgement Arcana) & Jose

Igor is the ruler of the Velvet Room, and the person who facilitates your rehabilitation in changing peoples’ hearts. However, ‘person’ isn’t quite right for Igor: he’s the God of Control, born from the desires of the collective masses who want to be controlled and be told what to do rather than make difficult decisions. It was a cool twist to realise that the God of Control had been impersonating the real Igor; I don’t know if Igor was lovely in the previous games, but he certainly is once you restore him at the end of 5. Despite him being interesting, I never felt like I had a connection with him, as you level up his Arcana automatically throughout the story, and he never tried to have a personal relationship with Joker.

Sae has her own palace and Arcana, but she’s not quite the same as the others. Like Igor, you level up automatically throughout the game when you confess to her the whole Phantom Thieves story, and while she does have a Palace, she doesn’t through any huge transformation other than realising that learning the truth is better than trying to win at any cost. She’s cool, and her outfit in her Palace is sexy, but you can’t romance her and can’t change much of what you say to her. I wish in Royal she could have been a fully fledged Confidant instead.

Jose counts even less. A new addition to Royal, he helps you change the cognition of Momentos by collecting stamps as you go further down, and he gives you items in exchange for flowers, so he definitely makes Momentos better. However, his addition is nothing world-shaking, and he only shows up randomly, which makes him quite annoying. I could have done without him, but at least he made Momentos more interesting than in the base game, which, compared to Palaces, was quite boring.

All in all, my main issue with the Confidant system as that you still can’t date boys. We’ve been saying for years ‘that’s just the Japanese way’, but considering the crazy hentai they bring out (still with only very little amounts of yaoi/gay hentai) it may be time to stop excusing them for not being with the times. Catherine: Full Body aimed to dispel that somewhat—perhaps Persona should too.

A Momentous Game

Overall, this is one of my favourite games of all time. The gameplay keeps me entertained for 100+ hours (though, to be fair, I do love long games) and the characters and writing makes me emotionally connect with the story they are telling. I’d suggest playing for at least 8 hours, as it’s a slow burn, but once that hurdle is jumped the real obsession begins.

Time to go and play Persona 4 Golden, as I’m not quite ready for the fun to be over yet.

[cathyparrlyn]

We’re all just mirror shards

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Hey everyone! It’s No One here, or perhaps you now know (if you have read a certain lovely, beautiful, baby tief’s post) that my name is Maddy. It’s great to finally post this next part, first update of 2020! Woo!....

Yeah, I know, it’s been a while. I’m sorry for that, but not only am I working on future chapters and a special writing project (some of you might have already heard about it, oops-), but like, school. Ugh. But don’t worry, I have plenty of content to give you guys, so I shouldn’t fall too behind with my updating schedule!

I want to shoutout two people today. First off, one of my writing friends, @justonemoretheatrekid who is super sweet and has helped me with my bi panic, so thanks friendo! I enjoyed chatting with you! :3

I also want to give a special thanks to another one of my writing friends, @toomanyfamdom for not only helping me edit this sucker (legit the only reason I was able to post today. Bless her soul for putting up with my comma crazy piece.), but also for being the sweetest and best baby in the world. She makes me a proud mama. :3 love you baby! And thank you for not joining in on the “(censored name) for the pole” chant. I know how much you like to troll me tho, so I guess will see what happens next time. Lol. <3

Also, good news and bad news! 

Good news! This chapter has the “read more” option! Bad News! It cost me all the pretty and colorful fonts. ;-; Also, it won’t let me edit my draft from my iPad now as I did the function on the computer. So like... I can’t fix it. :(

So now I have a dilemma. Which should I use, the read more function or the colorful and pretty fonts? Please reply down below if you have a preference. Anyways, enough with my long ass author note!

Without further interruption, the chapter! Woo!

Word count: about 2,212 words.

Warnings: Cursing, bullying. (Also, Anne being a useless lesbian gremlin and Cathy being a bi disaster. OWO UWU)

Enjoy~

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Part 11

Annie Boleyn

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…………………………………......Recap………………………………………

“Sorry about that, I’m just so fucking tired of bullshit,” Anne muttered, snapping Cathy out of her thoughts.

"Huh?"

……………………………………………………………………………………………

Cathy was a dumbass. She had to be. How else could she have fucked up so badly with her words? They were her thing! But with Anne, all she could muster up to say was ‘huh?’ Huh! Ugh, she just can’t with herself right now.

What’s worse, this is serious. Anne looks like she needs someone to talk to, Cathy can be that person, but not if she’s a disaster.

Parr wants to be there for Anne. She craves to develop their relationship, for them to get closer. To be able to share inside jokes and small smiles with each other. To have long conversations and calling each other late at night just to rant because they know the other will listen. For the comfort of knowing that she does, in fact, matter to Anne.

Right now she felt farther away from her goal than ever. Looking up, she saw an indescribable look on Anne’s face, the only thing she could note was the fear in Boleyn’s eyes as she held herself. An uneasy feeling washed over Anne as she realized she might have said too much around Cathy. She was nervous. Cathy couldn’t believe it. Anne was scared of her own opinion, and that worried Parr. Boleyn was speechless, not knowing how to respond. It was painful to see this side of her. Yet Cathy couldn’t help but stare. This new side drew her in, and Parr couldn’t stop herself from questioning more and more about who Anne really was. And what could have possibly happened to the Boleyn girl to make her feel so mortified that she couldn’t even express her own feelings.

Now Cathy was scared. She couldn’t just stand there and wait Anne recover on her own. No, Catherine wants to help her, she needs to help Anne.

So with a deep breath, Cathy had made her decision to keep moving forward with the conversation. She refused to make Anne start things, this time she’ll make the first move. For Anne’s sake.

“Hey, are you alright? I’m here for you if you want to talk about it.”

“No, no. It’s stupid, just, please. Forget about it.”

Cathy felt as if she was stabbed in the heart after hearing that statement. Anne was amazing, smart, talented, and said some of the most interesting things Cathy has ever heard. And here she is now, saying that her feelings are stupid.

Cathy doesn’t know who made her feel like this, but they are going to pay for it. Yet, that is for another time, right now Cathy has to focus on comforting the Boleyn girl.

“Hey Anne, we’re friends right?”

“Well, yeah, I would like to think so.” Anne tentatively mumbled. She expressed a blatant insecurity that Parr would reject the idea. But why?

Parr wanted to further analyze this side of Anne and try to figure out what might have happened to her, but she couldn’t. Not right now, when Anne needed a friend. No, especially now since Anne needed a friend, someone to be there for her, to reassure her things were okay. That is what Parr needed to be right now. Her friend.

Cathy smiled, bumping their shoulders together. Hence, grabbing Anne’s attention as Parr stared at her with a look that Anne wasn’t used to seeing: patience and love. With a gentle squeeze reminding Anne of their connected hands, Cathy let the Boleyn girl bask in the show of affection. Anne deserves to enjoy this moment, to feel comfortable with her own thoughts. What’s more, she deserves to have someone to listen to her. Cathy can very well be that person. All Catherine had to do was prove that she would and could be there for her. So she spoke up, determined to help Anne no matter what it takes.

“Then there you go. Your opinion matters to me, Anne. As your friend, I don’t think this is stupid. Not one bit. So please, don’t feel afraid to talk to me. You have a wonderful voice, and I truly think it should be shared with the world.”

Cathy observed as Anne stared at her in shock. A blush formed on Parr’s cheeks as she noticed a sudden change in the Boleyn girl. Tension had quickly left Anne’s face and was now replaced by a small, soft, genuine, and breathtaking smile. Really, Cathy could go on about the beauty of Anne’s smile, but she was rather focused on something else. It was way more important than her feelings. Gratitude, that’s what Anne’s expression conveyed instead of the fearful look she wore mere seconds ago. Anne gently squeezed Cathy’s hand back, returning the affection as she pulled Cathy in so they could be in closer proximity. The action cause both girls heart to race as they were lost in the moment, staring at each other in a comfortable, knowing silence. Both were thinking the same thing.

She does see me.

Finally after taking a few deep breaths, Anne was the first one to break the silence.

“Thank you, that… that really means a lot Cathy.”

“Of course Anne. Do you, um... Do you want to talk about it?” Cathy gingerly asked.

Anne looked down as she contemplated what to do. After a few seconds of thinking it over, she slowly nodded her head.

“Alright, I’m here to listen whenever you ready.” Parr, acknowledging that she was looking down, squeezed Anne’s hand again. Cathy hopes it would reassure Boleyn that Parr planned on being there for her. Seeing that Anne had mustered up the courage to look up at Catherine and start her explanation, Cathy thinks it’s safe to say that it worked.

"Ok, so, our generation is stupid, right?” Anne started off.

“100% agree, continue please.”

“It’s just, no one cares about others' stories. Make believe or real, every story matters. Yet we cast them aside and hold an egocentric viewpoint that mentally and physically tears others down. And I’m so fucking sick of it!”

“Of the kids in the halls?” Cathy hesitantly asked.

“Of basically everyone! They all piss me off! Like, no one even understands why I read, the majority of those people don’t even think I can read! I’m nearly eighteen, for Christ's sake! How would I be in an advanced English class if I couldn’t read?”

“I don’t know, kids are stupid.”

“I know, but… you’re the first person to understand this and believe me…”

“Really?”

“Yeah, Anna won't shut up about how I can't do math, Kitty doesn't like poetry and always whines about me speaking ‘gibberish’ when I rant about it, and the rest of the school thinks I text shit like, 'dat waz fun' smiley face, winky face, kissy cat." Anne rolled her eyes. "It's just..." she pursed her lips, then looked at Cathy and gave her a small smile. "It hurts after a while, y’know. So it's extremely refreshing to finally talk to someone who appreciates writing."

"I totally get that." Cathy nodded.

"Really?" Anne stared at her as if she had two heads.

"Yeah... actually, at my last school, I was teased for reading so much," Cathy elaborated honestly. She doesn't know why, but she felt a need to tell Anne this. It was as if that Boleyn girl elicited a strong desire for Parr to talk about herself. She wanted to know all about Anne, and for Anne to know all about her.

Even if it was about her embarrassing loser past. It's not like she can escape it, only accept it and move forward.

"What the hell is wrong with this generation? That's stupid!" Anne groaned.

Well, at least Anne agreed with her about the matter.

"They called me novel nerd," Cathy bluntly stated.

"... Fucking Alliteration." Anne said after muttering what Cathy assumed was French swear words. She then pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Yeah." Cathy bitterly laughed.

"Want me to fight them for you?" Anne offered, holding her fist up and pretending to punch the air to show she was being serious.

"No, but thanks... it's just like you said earlier, it's nice just to be comfortable enough to talk about these things with someone and know that they respect it." Cathy smiled at her.

Anne lifted Catherine's hand up a bit and gently stroked it.

"Cath, I got you." The gentle action caused Cathy to blush. Anne then looked up with a spark of mischief. "Let's run away to live in a library."

Cathy couldn't help but let out an unlady-like snort. A bit embarrassing, yes. But luckily for Catherine, Anne adored it. She couldn't stop herself from adoring it even if she tried.

"Sounds like heaven." Parr grinned, finally managing to calm her laughter.

They both stared at each other for a few seconds in silence, but after those few seconds of silence, they burst into a laughing fit.

Catherine then looked up at Anne. Something caught her attention about her suggestion. The way she referred to something, or rather, herself.

"Cath, Huh?" She raised an eyebrow, looking Anne over in a teasing manner.

It's time for some playful payback.

She noticed how Anne flinched, and for a quick second, looked embarrassed, but it quickly washed away and was replaced by her usual confident expression.

"Oh, yeah. I just think it's cute and, um, it suits you. Is it alright if I call you that?" Anne asked.

Cathy couldn't stop the dorky smile that was spread across her face. Just hearing Anne give her a nickname just like how she had given one to Katherine, warmed Cathy up inside. She was growing closer to Anne each second and her interest for the girl continued to grow.

"Sure, but only if I get to call you nicknames too!" She agreed.

"Go for it, you got two slots."

Catherine pondered for a second. What should she call her?

Catherine couldn't help but giggle at the first thought to come to mind.

"Okay, first one has to be gremlin."

Anne's smile dropped and her eyebrows furrowed.

"You know what Cath? Fuck you." She huffed, a small pout was plastered on her face. Ergo, causing Cathy to burst into a giggling fit.

After a few seconds of giggling and admiring Anne's pouty face, Cathy managed to calm down.

"Okay, um... Next is.... hm."

It took Cathy a few seconds as she looked Anne up and down. She didn't actually need to check the girl out, she just wanted an excuse too.

The action, however, had caused Anne to blush.

Then it hit Cathy. Her lips quirked up at the idea for what to call the Boleyn girl. Sure, it was simple, but so was Cathy. So it’s fine. No, Parr will do one better.

It was perfect.

"Annie," Catherine said, squeezing Anne's hand and beaming at her with a warm smile.

Anne's happy expression fell after hearing that. Cathy noticed the change in expression.

"Um, is everything alright?" She asked.

"H-huh? Oh, um, yeah. It's swell." Anne nervously looked away.

Cathy stared at her worried, but Anne refused to show any sign of pain. Instead, she just gave Cathy a fake smile and avoided eye contact.

There it is again. The change in expression, the change in tone, the change in the atmosphere around her. All of these changes thickened the air and added to the mystery of Anne Boleyn.

Who was she?

Just a second ago, she was all bubbly. But with just a single name, she instantly became a timid sheep. She wore nervous, wide eyes that were surveilling the surroundings as if she was watching out for a predator, fearing for her life. However, the only other person there was Cathy.

She did that. She did this to Anne Boleyn. She doesn't know how, nor why, but she did it. An god, did it feel awful.

Cathy could only do what she thought was right at the time, to check on the girl.

With a gentle squeeze initiated by Cathy, Anne's eyes slowly looked up. Her breathing was a little heavy and her face was a calm, serious. Cathy's anxiety grew with each lurid second passing. Finally, after making it all the way up the excruciating trail, Anne's eyes met Cathy's.

For a brief second Cathy swore she saw the corner of Anne's eyes filling up with tears, and her skin was slightly paler than usual.

But it disappeared in seconds as she hastily swapped her expressions, as if she was trying to hide something. She... she was trying to hide herself.

Anne had put back on her mask, yet it was too late.

Her perfect image had already broke in front of Cathy, not that she planned on telling Anne that.

So with a heavy sigh, Cathy acknowledge that she needed to do something.

"Anne I-"

"Stop it. There's no need for that." Anne interrupted her in a cold tone, yet she still had a "smile" plastered on her face.

"Huh?" Cathy looked at her confused.

"Really Cath, I'm fine." She muttered loud enough for Cathy to hear her.

Cathy knew that wasn't the case. It most certainly wasn't the case at all. Cathy wanted to convey to Anne that she knew this, and that she wanted to help her. She wanted to stop right there, tell Anne it's okay not to be okay, perhaps even give her a hug.

But she didn't know Anne. They weren't close. Anne said it herself, they just met recently. And although Cathy was connecting with her, Anne might not be as into it. She doesn't know. Boleyn is still a mystery to her, one she has yet to uncover.

So how could she break through Anne's mask? She didn't have the right because she doesn't know her. At least, she doesn't know her yet.

"Okay. If you say so...." she reluctantly dropped the subject.

Mark Cathy's words, she'll read Anne's backstory one day. Cathy might cry, she might laugh, hell, she might not know what to think. But she knows that she'll be there for Anne when the time comes.

Until that day comes, this is all she could do for now.

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Tag list: @sarahzarahh @annabanana2401 @lesbabe6 @aveasorae @qnneboleyn @whenallthestarscollide @its-totes-gods-will @canadianharrypotter @epitomeofchaoss @obliviousasheck @heeleys4feeleys @liliocelotepremium @six-is-awesome @thatbolxyngirl @toomanyfamdom @the-queen-bee-is-here @a-slightly-cracked-egg @thatonedisaster-gay @aywdaimie @thegaywhokindalikesmusicals @everything-insanity @babeebobo @one-time-i-jumped-off-a-cliff @wicked-books-101 @33o9 @agustjnk @i-really-dont-use-this-anymore Please reply if you wish to join the tag list or if your username changes so I can update the list :D

[naancypants]

@maddarc you inspired me with this headcanon idea!! I wasn’t sure how to write something like this using regular scenes, so I tried something a little different to help span the time gaps. It’s not the best thing I’ve ever written lol but I just kinda threw it together so it’s whatever, here's a thing ✌ (@nancydrew-onthecase)

Dear Diary,

Tomorrow is my 14th birthday. Since mom is getting me the new Playstation system that I asked for, she made me agree to keep a diary. She thinks it’ll be good for me to write stuff down. But honestly, I don’t even know what to write about. This is gonna be awkward.

Joe

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Dear Diary,

Okay... I did a terrible job at keeping a diary. Whenever mom asked if I was using it I told her yes, but I think she could tell that I wasn’t - she didn’t give me crap about it, though. I’m 15 now, and Frank & I are deep in training to become ATAC agents. That’s the company our dad owns - American Teens Against Crime. We’ve been solving petty mysteries since we were kids, so I guess this is a natural progression for us. An awesome one, too! We get to use so many cool gadgets and go on the best adventures! The secrecy is exciting, but according to Frank, I’ve never been the best at keeping my mouth shut. I guess we’ll see how it goes.

Joe

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Dear Diary,

Frank and I finished off the BIGGEST case of our careers last week! We’d been called out to this small town called River Heights because there was a serial bank robber who’d been evading police for a couple of months - but the best part is we didn’t have to solve the case alone! We met this girl named Nancy; her dad is a business contact of our dad’s. She’s super smart. She figured stuff out even faster than Frank! And when I suggested we go to the ice cream shop to talk over the case - much to Frank’s dismay - she just laughed and said “sure!”. Take that, Frank. It was a lot of fun... she’s a lot of fun. And she’s pretty. ... Stop looking at me like that. Not that you’re looking, because you are a book. But you know what I mean. Or I guess you don’t, because you are a book. But anyway... I hope we get to work with her again, that’s all.

Joe

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Dear Diary,

We’ve gotten to work with Nancy a lot more than I thought, considering how far away we live. She’s cool because she never complains when I want to do something fun, unlike Frank. And I know I said this last time, but she’s reeeally smart. It’s honestly kind of amazing. For one case, we had to break into this abandoned house because Nancy had a hunch - as soon as Frank saw the “no trespassing” signs he was totally going to be a baby about it, but Nancy got him in line real quick. She took a pair of wire cutters and made a hole in the fence for us to crawl through, JUST LIKE IN THE MOVIES! And then she picked the lock of the back door with a bobby pin in like 5 seconds flat! My jaw was literally on the floor. They teach us how to lockpick in ATAC training, but we always have actual lockpicks to do it. I’m hoping Nancy can teach me her method one day.

And... okay, yeah, I guess you can look at me like that. Fine. You win this time, diary.

Joe

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Dear Diary,

It’s been almost 6 months since we first met Nancy and a lot has changed since then. For one, I recently learned that she’s been dating this guy named Ned for like a year & a half now, or something like that. Who’s keeping track? Two, Frank basically bullied me into admitting to him that I.. have a crush on Nancy. He’s not going to tell her though, not that I think he would anyway. He gets all weird and dorky when he tries to talk about feelings. It’s not a good look. Either way, there’s no chance in H-E-double hockey sticks that Nancy and Ned will ever break up, and I’m happy for them! He’s such a good guy it’s insane. Probably better than me, and that’s saying a lot.

Joking aside... I’m going to try to get over Nance. There’s no point in feeling this way about her if it’s never gonna happen!

Joe

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Dear Diary,

I swear to God Frank is acting weirder every time we see Nancy. He KNOWS that I had a crush on her but he KNOWS that I don’t anymore... or does he? I think he thinks that I still do, but I’ve done a good job at blocking it out. We’re 18 now, so it’s been a while. I normally don’t even think about it until Frank starts acting like a total loser around her and then I’m like...??? WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? Anytime Nancy mentions Ned or their relationship or anything to do with love, he starts stuttering and blushing and acting all goofy. I’ve started having to fake-tease HIM about having a crush on her just to make it less awkward! I didn’t realize he was sooooo dense when it comes to romance. When I asked him about it, he said my former crush on Nancy was useless information that he wishes I hadn’t told him (NEWSFLASH: he made me tell him) and now he just doesn’t know what to do with it. Nancy seems to think it’s totally normal, but he looks like an idiot.

Joe

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Dear Diary,

It’s been a long time. I’m 24, Frank is 25. I think it’s funny how the only thing I ever really wrote about in here was Nancy Drew. It’s ironic, too, because that’s exactly who I’ve come to write about again.

She’s going through a lot right now and I wish I could be there for her more than I am. I do what I can, but it’s not easy when you live 4 hours away and are constantly being called away on cases. I also don’t want to overwhelm her, considering how long she and Ned were together. It feels... wrong, somehow, that they aren’t anymore. Frank of course has been telling me that I “finally have a shot” or whatever, but I’m not convinced. First of all, she’s only been single for 2 months. Second, she probably thinks Frank is the one with feelings for her, not me; especially with the way the media likes to focus on their relationship. But, as I always joke with Frank, it’s his own fault for making it weird!

Anyway. I feel like kind of a jerk for thinking about my feelings for Nancy when she’s literally going through the worst break-up of her life right now... but it’s weird how thing can pop back up again so suddenly, huh?

And as always, it’s not like I’m gonna do anything about it.

Joe

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Nancy Drew sits on the edge of her chair, sweeping her ponytail so that it drapes delicately across her shoulder. She sucks in a deep breath, fixing her anxious gaze on a random spot in the hardwood of Frank & Joe’s family home. It’s a conversation she’s been avoiding ever since her break-up with Ned 10 months ago. Crazy how time flies. “Frank...” she begins, noticing a distinct discomfort in the detective’s body language as she does so, “I - we’ve all seen the stories. The ones on the news, the speculation... about...?” Frank only stares at her, blankly, with eyes resembling those of a terrified deer. “About the two of us. Being together.” “Uhh, yeah,” Frank scratches at the back of his neck. “I’ve seen them. What about them?” Nancy sighs and allows her shoulders to make contact with the Hardys’ side chair. She crosses her arms over her chest. “I’m a detective, Frank. And I’ve known you & Joe since we were 15. I just want to clear the air about whatever is or is not going on. I guess, to be blunt, what I’m asking you is if there’s any truth to all those rumors.” “You did always have a way of being blunt when you need to be.” Nancy lifts an eyebrow at him, otherwise unmoving in her position. “I... ah, no, Nancy, there -” “It’s okay, Frank, really, if there is. You can tell me.” “It’s not that, Nancy. It isn’t me.” Ding-ding. Nancy hones in on his peculiar choice of words. “What do you mean, it isn’t you?” “I - listen. It doesn’t matter. I told you honestly. Are the rumors true for you?” His attempt to distract her is futile. “What did you mean by it isn’t you?” “Nancy, look. I made a promise that I wouldn’t talk about it.” “Talk about what?” Both Nancy and Frank turn their heads to see Joe Hardy drop his motorcycle keys onto the shelf next to the front door. What serendipitous timing, Frank thinks with a roll of his eyes.  “Nothing,” he says quickly, darting across the living room to the staircase with his hands out in front of him, “I’m letting the two of you talk this one out.” Joe glares after his brother, because despite not knowing what this was about, there’s no way he was going to like it. Nancy approaches him from behind. “All I did was ask Frank if he had feelings for me, like in all the media reports. Then he said it ‘wasn’t him’ and insisted that he wasn’t supposed to tell me about it. Do you know anything about that?” Joe swallows the lump in his throat as his heart rate picks up to about 580bpm. ...At least, that’s what it feels like. Joe’s first instinct is to stop & consider if there’s any way he can worm his way out of telling her at this moment; but at the same time, he thinks it may be better to just let things flow. “Uhh.” ...Okay never mind, decision has to be made. NOW. “Is it... you?” ...Oh, that’s right. She’s super smart. When Joe slowly turns around to face her, he can tell from the glassy look in her eyes that she’s already pieced together the whole thing. And for once, he doesn’t know what to say. So he doesn’t. Her breathing is heavy and uneven, to say nothing of his own. The only sound is the steady ticking of the mantle clock. Joe has no idea why but he has an irrepressible urge to apologize. He just wishes his voice doesn’t crack when he does. “Sorry, Nance.” Her immediate response is to tearfully shake her head and wrap her arms tightly around his waist. “Why are you apologizing?” Joe swallows again, hesitantly allowing his hands to fall onto her cardigan-clad back. “I- I don’t know.” and then after a beat, “Should I?” Nancy chuckles a bit as she pulls back, wiping at her eyes. “You should never have to apologize for how you feel, Joe.” That makes him feel a little better. But then, after an agonizing silence during which they have refused to make eye contact, he feels like sickening nerves start to take up residence in his stomach once again. “How do you feel?” Joe forces himself to ask, bracing for impact. Nancy exhales, placing a hand on her cheek. She has an odd sort of smile on her face that Joe doesn’t think he’s seen in the 9 years he’s known her. “I’ll be honest with you, Joe.” Oh, God. “It’s never occurred to me.” He swallows for the 758th time. Why didn’t he grab some water first? But then, to his surprise, Nancy giggles - like, she actually giggles. He’s never heard her giggle before. “But I think I like the idea.” “Wait what?” She gives him a meltingly genuine smile and steps a little closer. “You’ve always been there for me, Joe. You’ve made me laugh, brought soup when I was sick, gave me a call because I said I was lonely. And you’re always up for an adventure,” she causes his heart to go ballistic once again when she places her palms against either side of his waist, “And you know how much I love new adventures.” Now, at last, a smile cracks on Joe’s face - that goofy, wisecracker smile of his that somehow matches this moment entirely. He nods at her as elation finally makes its way in, and elation is the driving force behind their first kiss. There is a remarkable lack of uncertainty between Joe’s enthusiasm and Nancy’s natural reactions - it’s been a long time coming for one, and for the other, it’s an entirely new adventure.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

[realm-sweet-realm]

Aimless rambling about the ink thinner AU

So, I’ve always kind of wanted to explore this comedy au in more depth (and no, I’m not writing a fanfic on it. It would be aimless). If you don’t know what I’m talking about, the ink thinner AU is one where the crew gets the opposite of their usual personality for a week. This doesn’t include a person’s abilities or attitudes about specific people (it won’t make Wally smart, or make Sammy instantly fall in love with him). It’s an interesting concept to explore- what would you, as a person, do if you could be separated from so much of what keeps you where you are for a week?

I’m going to add an extra detail: on day two, Joey figures out what happened and calls the other twelve into his office to explain. All of those who have families and/or significant others will have a meeting together that night to explain what’s going on to their loved ones so they can work out an arrangement.

Original post is here: https://youllallriseinthenk.tumblr.com/post/187692782312/what-would-happen-if-each-of-the-batim-employees

The post is about what their personalities are, but I want to talk about how they’d handle it.

Henry: has way too many emotions and no way to handle them since he’s always been super calm without much effort. On the plus side, he 100% takes advantage of Joey’s temporary reasonableness so he can get him to make some changes around the studio in regards to working conditions. Does his best to contain himself at home. (His kids mostly just think it’s funny.)

Joey: It was a long week for him. Suddenly developing empathy when you’re a person who’s done so much wrong isn’t easy, and he was also a pretty somber person in general that week. On the plus side, he made some great changes to the company and apologized to a bunch of people he did wrong to.

Sammy: is really even-tempered all week. Takes the opportunity to apologize Susie and Wally for being so snappish all the time, and tackles particularly frustrating parts in the songs he’s working on.

Susie: Is finally able to look at things logically and leave her obsession with the Alice role behind. Being less naive, she comes to a realization that she is being seriously mistreated at Joey Drew Studios and writes down why she thinks that so that she will remember when the week is over. Signs up for auditions elsewhere. Her cynicism is really off-putting, though.

Allison: is outwardly a total bitch all week, but her fire for novelty is gone, at least. It’s pretty uneventful for her, except that Thomas is really kind to her. She and Susie go out to bitch about life over coffee at one point.

Thomas: it’s a very peaceful week for him. He’s able to have a productive and helpful discussion with Joey (see below) and can connect with Allison in a way that’s hard to come by for him now that he’s in a rare state of inner peace and contentment. Will probably miss this more than anyone.

Jack: essentially spends the week making his rounds on every person that routinely takes advantage of him, chews them out, and sets new boundaries on the relationship. Goes harder on some people than they deserve and apologizes to them as soon as the week is over. He also crashes at Sammy’s place so that his family doesn’t have to deal with him being an asshole.

Wally: was so depressed that he spent the first day of it in bed. Afterwards, he was determined to move up in the world and made a plan to do so. He was thinking “who’s the last person I’d normally want the help of,” and invited Shawn to help him.

Norman: was really sociable all week and made a bunch of friends with people not affected by ink thinner. He lost track of most of them afterwards, but he kept a few.

Grant: obviously enjoyed being cheerful and energetic. Used the opportunity to draw up a detailed financial plan for the studio to get as much as possible fixed, and especially to get as much done as possible before Joey was back to normal. Also tackled some things in his home life that usually seem too hard or intimidating.

Bertrum: is essentially thrown into a paralyzing existential crisis because everything he’s ever done was to become as big and noticeable as possible, but now he feels like an disgusting embarrassment and just wants to hide and never be seen or thought of again. (Yeah... a person who hates themself as much as Bertie loves himself is a wild mess.)

Lacie: really has to help Bertrum stand up for himself. Thankfully she’s feeling really gentle and nurturing right now. Eventually she just has to encourage him to take the time off and not make any big decisions until he’s himself again.

Some events:

-Jack chews Joey the fuck out for everything, which makes him cry. Sammy as well. Both of them treat him with kindness that week. Sammy didn’t even realize he was mistreating Jack until he told him because Jack is just that much of a cheerful pushover. Sammy changes his behaviour towards Jack after the week is over. On the other hand, Jack picks a fight with Allison that ends with him in the infirmary.

-on day two, during the meeting where Joey tells everyone what’s going on, Wally drops some line about how depressed he’s been. After the meeting, Grant takes him aside and offers to tell him some of his coping mechanisms, since he’s used to dealing with it. Wally takes him up on the offer. The two passed by each other a few times that week and Grant made a point of asking Wally how he’s doing. After the week, Wally started asking the same thing on the occasions when they crossed paths (until Wally left, that is. See below.)

-Since Thomas doesn’t feel so under-thumb anymore he tries to have a serious talk with Joey about the ink machine. Joey tearfully admits that the ink machine is evil and they should get rid of it. Being both unusually sentimental and naive, Thomas comforts him and promises not to go to the police so long as Joey immediately gives the order to start taking down the machine. Of course, that order is immediately reversed the second the week is over, and so is Thomas’ willingness to go to the authorities.

-Wally and Shawn have a deep, meaningful conversation about their future careers. Wally writes out a plan to take a second job so he can save enough money to take some time off, learn a trade, and go into a career that will make him happier with himself. Shawn considers looking for a job as a chef and leaving the studio behind. The second the week is over, Wally is so glad to feel alive again that he immediately crinkles up the plan and is like, “Hey Shawn, fuck this, I’m happy right here!” To help him celebrate, Shawn sets fire to the plan and dares Wally to stuff it in his mouth. He does. After the week, Shawn actually does go on to become a chef, and gets Wally a job as a janitor at the restaurant. Thus, neither of them get sacrificed.

-Right before the week is over, Jack gets ahold of the intercom, and tells everyone that he’s found more ink thinner and will drink a whole gallon of it if anyone tries treating him like dirt again. A few days afterwards, Grant and Thomas approach Jack, and, well, it wasn’t easy telling the poor guys that there was no more ink thinner.

If you have anything to add, reblog and add it.

[drivingsideways]

thoughts on episode 28-29, spoilers under the cut

well, after a long time, I got two episodes in a row that I actually enjoyed quite a lot! Mostly because the drama spent the time on inner palace drama and not so much on court politics, though of course, plot wise, they were inter-related! 

In random order of things:

- The “subplot” of Xia Song and Jia got some unexpected screen time. I always liked these two schemy, corrupt characters and their relationship, and this episode we get the other side of Jia’s “I tried to commit suicide when he married that woman” line; turns out our crafty, moderately competent, not very good looking Comissioner Xia is also deeply in love with her??? He wrote the loveliest song for/about her!! (A song she sings in one of the early episodes, about lovers parting!) And he loves her for who she is, including that she sent her niece to his household, in a petty act of spite/ revenge, which was apparently the last straw for his wife? Like the unexpected bitter-sweetness of their relationship really came for my heart!!! I half wished Jia had left the palace when the Emperor told her that he would grant the separation, but not allow Xia Song to marry again and that he’d be sent away. On the other hand, given who she is, why would she? She’s ruthlessly pragmatic and probably realizes that Xia Song’s love for her might not outlast the ignominy of exile and poverty! But I think the decision does hurt , and I doubt we’ve seen the last of this couple! I’m kind of secretly rooting for them in my heart!! I want them to survive this clusterfuck of a world that is palace politics!!!

- Unexpected fallout of domestic drama is- more domestic drama, but within the palace walls! How much did I love that He’er goes to war against Zhang Bihan??? Like, bitch you thought????? I also loved the scenes later with He’er and Danshu- where He’er admits that (a) her daughter is more important to her than the emperor and (b) that in fact, she feels closer to Danshu than the Empress.  I feel deeply sorry for He’er, though He’er herself doesn’t seem to feel unhappy except for Bihan’s drama? Like she was barely 15 when she made that decision to enter the palace- and despite the Empress Dowager warning her, the Empress Dowager didn’t really attempt to  dissuade her either, I think. But these many years later, you can’t help wish she’d not made that decision; she was clearly someone who’d have been happier in a more normal domestic arrangement. That said, He’er showing some fire in these two episodes was a welcome change, especially when you also see how her attitude toward the Emperor has also undergone a slight change.

- Speaking of people whose feelings about the Emperor are changing- surprise, Zhang Bihan is beginning have mixed feelings about him too- he’s no longer the “ideal man” in her life, whom she must possess- instead, his whims and fancies are even more real as a threat to her and her child now. Bihan beginning to  listen to Jia and play the smart game is also a good change, though I do feel her character has been irreparably damaged by the careless writing from the start. 

- And speaking of people whose feelings about the Emperor AREN’T changing- oh, Danshu. On the one hand, I feel like this stasis is bad writing? Because I’m frankly *tired * of women pining after asshole men until one day, miraculously, their quiet devotion gets “rewarded” when the asshole “realizes” their worth. Fuck that noise. 

On the other hand, I do feel that deep loyalty and stubborn holding on to an ideal despite the hurt it causes her, is also very Danshu? Like you see that in the way she went ahead with the marriage to the Daoist dude; and re: Zhao Zhen, she fell in love with the idea of him much before she fell in love with him, and the two aren’t really separable now. And the more he fails to live up to that ideal, the less she’s able to admit it to herself, because to do that would be to destroy everything she’s given her entire life to, and the last years since her marriage(7?10? I’ve lost track) in particular.  It would be admitting that the hurt goes deeper than just being in love unrequited; it would mean admitting that the man in her idealistic heart does not exist. Hence- the always finding excuses for him, even for his grossest excesses, and I’m not even talking about the personal hurts. Yes, he sent ten thousand men to their death , but he just made a mistake, and he’s so deeply sorry, and even when he exhibits some self-awareness of that (when he admits that the decision was driven in part by his desire to be remembered as great), even when he does that, she’s more inclined to forgive him than not. She cannot, like the audience, take a dispassionate look at him and say “Alright he’s a fairly decent ruler, but he’s an absolute disaster of a human being!!”  Like that’s probably the cultural/philosophical ethos of the time too working on her, because the Emperor was the nation, and the nation was everything? At least for someone from her particular family and social class, and her own ambitions to serve that ideal. 

It makes me wonder if there’s ever going to be a point of no return for her? What would it take to crush that idea of him in her head completely? What would he have to do? We already know it’s nothing against her personally that would do the trick- she’s swallowed his insults and neglect for years and years. If the break comes, I suspect it has to be something where he acts in an unjustifiable  way to someone else- perhaps Huaiji or Huirou or (hehehe) Maoze- something that irreparably damages his image in her eyes as a kind and good and benevolent ruler. But I don’t know if it will ever happen in the drama. Historically speaking, they never separated. Which is fine, but I would also be super interested in a story where Danshu slowly changes into someone who’s comfortable to take power for herself ( and not necessarily as an end in itself, but as a means to an end?), rather than serve, as the scales fall from her eyes.  Again history says, she was practically forced to retire from her position as regent after Renzong’s death. I don’t know if the drama will go there- more likely it’ll stop a little after his death, and the establishment of her as regent and Zongshi as emperor. 

Anyways, at this point, I’ve more or less accepted that *my * happy ending for Danshu in canon would basically be her surviving Emperor Fucklord and being surrounded by people to love and admire her, and no longer having to play second fiddle to a man she’s ten times better than. 

- In Emperor Fucklord update- he gets really angry with Maoze in a way that’s not totally explicable? As a result he both gives Maoze a promotion while simultaneously sending Maoze away from him; later, when he finds out that Dong Qiuhe was hired by Maoze, I think he’s already, in his mind using it to justify his angry reaction to Maoze’s telling him that he’d failed to report Xia Song’s affair with Jia to him. Perhaps Emperor Fucklord is so angry because he feels that the whole scandal could have been avoided if Maoze had kept him informed; perhaps he feels that giving Maoze more leeway not fully in accordance with usual conventions is against the principle he was preaching to Huaiji just before- the need to control even “personal kindness” because it could lead to indiscipline and overturning of the stable social order. RULES ARE GOOD, is Emperor Fucklord’s new mantra, after spending half his life thus far blaming every woman in sight for following rules! Perhaps it’s the retreat of a ruler who’s been badly hurt by the debacle of the war, perhaps it’s just the usual thing where people become more conservative as they get older? Whatever it is, I foresee some immediate pain for Maoze and the Empress as they navigate this more rigid version of him coupled with his paranoia. 

- The contrast between Emperor Fucklord’s embrace of convention and tradition just as Huirou, in her innocence, is questioning everything is nicely done, and sets the stage for their future conflicts. 

- I like the Huirou/Huaiji friendship; her unknowing poking at his wounds, and her immediate regret when she sees that he’s hurting. I also really like that it’s essentially her friendship with him that’s setting her on the path of questioning a lot of shit that passes for “tradition”. She’s too young to know it or feel it as keenly now, but as a noble woman, she’s only a few steps higher in practice, than the eunuch. And I don’t doubt that it’s partly that kinship which will drive their relationship forward. 

The only thing slightly uncomfortable for me is that knowing these two are meant to be a couple in the future shadows all the current (non sexual/romantic!) interaction, and with the age difference between them, it’s just- weird. Perhaps if I hadn’t known their future trajectory, it would be easier. I should clarify it’s nothing inappropriate in their writing- it’s just the foreknowledge fucks it up for me. 

Anyways, the one thing I didn’t get in these two episodes was any direct interaction between Maoze + Danshu and that is unacceptable!!!!! Why am I even watching this except for them???!!!! PFFFT. 

[gastricpierrot]

Title: Heartbeat

Series: Promare

Pairing: GaloLio

Rating: T

Summary:

Lio turns himself in after the final battle, the start of a new life he must get used to.

This is a story of how Lio Fotia navigates through the days that follow, learns that support comes in more forms than he’s ever familiar with, and deals with his alarmingly developing feelings for Galo Thymos.

Warning: there are hints of sexual harassment at the end of the chapter

Also on AO3

[Prologue]

[Chapter 1]

Galo’s there almost every evening, always ready to greet him a good day’s work with a grin and a wave from afar.

Lio’s understandably confused at first. The heck is that idiot even doing? He’s sure the Burning Rescue headquarters are on the other side of town. And doesn’t he have his own work to attend to? Why does he bother showing up every day without fail just to let Lio catch a glance of him before he has to go back to the detention center?

“I’m just worried you’d be lonely or something,” Galo admits when Lio asks him during his first actual authorized visit. “Y’know, with you suddenly having to be locked up and kept away from your pals like that.”

“I was prepared for all this when I turned myself in, Galo,” Lio assures, though he can’t deny feeling an ember of warmth in his chest from Galo’s concern. It's pleasant; it isn’t something he gets to experience often lately.

It’s been...dull, in more ways than one. Lio’s days are monotonous, following the same sequence of events each day with only variations in the tasks he’s assigned to in between. He's slowly getting used to hearing only his own voice in his head, to the unrelenting cold that’s settled in his being in place of his flames. On some days he’d still miss the companionship of the Burnish, the sense of belonging he’d unintentionally grown so attached to. He misses the freedom most of all, the sense of independence that came with being able to do virtually anything he wanted.

He’s resolved to bear these invisible shackles. He knows. It is his decision and he’s resolved to go through with it until the very end. It's not easy and he’d been fully aware of that.

“But still.” Galo frowns, crossing his arms as he leans back against the chair that seems almost comically too small for him.  “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

“How sweet,” Lio teases, prompting Galo to stutter some other excuse about Gueira and the kids always pestering him to go check on their dear Boss and some other nonsense. He smiles, leaning forward and resting his chin on his palm. “And? Mind telling me how you’re doing? Though I suppose we don’t really have much time left for a lot of details.”

“Well it’s—huh?” Galo blinks. “You’re asking about me?”

“I’ve seen enough on the news to get an idea on what’s going on with the former Burnish.” Lio shrugs. “Professor Ardebit and her team are about to get that equality bill passed, aren’t they?”

“Oh, yeah. I heard they’ve been working super hard at it, too.” Galo’s eyes brighten as he goes on. “Did’ya also hear? They’ve found a way to stop those decay-like symptoms that some of the Burnish were left with from the generator! They just need do some final tests and soon those who had it bad could just get some prosthetics and be good as new!”

“That’s... amazing,” Lio marvels, genuinely awed by how much attention and support is given to his people. It's a comforting reminder that not everyone shares the same, frigid mindset of Burnish being monsters. It makes his isolation from the rest a little easier to bear. “That really is amazing.”

“Ain’t it!!” Galo’s quickly shushed when he accidentally raises his voice in his excitement. “Man, smart people who do good sure deserve all the respect.”

“They do,” Lio agrees, wholeheartedly. Those are all feats he knows he’d never be able to achieve all by himself. “But enough about that. I’m still curious to know how you’re finding the time to keep coming all the way here every evening, Galo Thymos.”

“I mean, Burning Rescue was formed to contain Burnish activity in the city,” Galo looks away and drags his syllables, in his own attempt for delicacy. “With the Promare gone...”

“Even the young hero of Promepolis can take it easy for a bit,” Lio finishes for him, only belatedly hoping he didn’t sound bitter because really, he isn’t. He doesn’t regret what he’s done as part of Mad Burnish, nor does he deny having deliberately carried out his actions in the past. These are simply the consequences he must now face.

His statement doesn’t sit well with Galo, though for a reason that doesn’t have to do with how he’d come across while uttering it. Galo stares at him, eyebrows knitted with...disapproval? Lio isn’t quite certain.

“You’re one too, Lio.”

Galo's words are quiet. Weighty.

“I don’t care what everyone thinks—Earth wouldn’t have been saved without you. You’re just as much of a hero as I am, Lio.”

“You don’t know the extent of what I've done as Mad Burnish, Galo” Lio says calmly, though he finds trouble in holding Galo’s gaze. “I don’t deserve to be called that.”

“You fought for the sake of your kind who were badly oppressed. That sounds noble enough to me,” Galo insists. “And if anyone tries to mess with you for that, they’ll have to face me and my blazing fury!”

It’s truly such a Galo thing to say. Lio can’t help letting out a little laugh. “You really can be naïve at times, Galo Thymos. You know damn well what kind of place this is.”

It instantly gets him all worked up. “Why!! Who's messing with you!! Who do I meet in the pit!!”

“You don’t have to know.” Lio waves dismissively. “Hell, I don’t need you punching idiots on my behalf.”

It's strange. Lio doesn’t think they’re even close enough to be considered proper friends yet; sure they piloted the Deus Ex Machina together and stopped the end of the world—but there’s still so much they don’t know about each other. Sure, they’d saved each other’s lives multiple times while they were at it—but they’d still became partners at random and have properly spoken to each other for maybe only two hours in total. Does that really qualify Lio to this much attention and concern from Galo? Lio has never actually understood how it works.

“Then why haven’t you done it yourself!!”

Lio understands that half of what Galo’s saying at this point is driven mostly by his agitation. Gueira can sometimes be a bit like that too, getting all worked up and not thinking his thoughts through before he speaks. He breathes, trying not to take his oversimplification to heart. Galo doesn’t mean it. He just doesn’t really understand.

“I was Mad Burnish’s leader, Galo. Every single thing I do here is observed and recorded, and it could all reflect on my people in the end.” Lio rolls his ankle, suddenly uncomfortably aware of the tracker implanted within his flesh. “Even one small mistake could be blown up to serve a point. I do not wish to waste the effort that’s been made for our sake.”

His explanation dampens Galo quickly enough. “So you’re saying you’ll bear it. All alone.”

“I will.” Lio watches as the guard walks in to tell Galo his time is up. “This is what I can do for them right now.”

Galo lingers despite the guard’s orders, jaw set while he tries to process everything Lio has just said. The fire doesn’t leave his eyes even as he gives up on the argument Lio’s sure he’s thought about voicing.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Lio,” is all he says before he leaves. Lio remains seated for a minute or two longer, ears aching from the silence or the plunge of adrenaline, he isn’t sure.

He really hadn't expected Galo to leave such a huge sense of absence behind him.

xXx

On weekends, Lio attends classes.

They’re mostly basic education, at least in Lio’s case. He hasn’t properly received any since he awakened as a Burnish when he was a kid, after all. He’d learnt enough to read and write to a decent extent, and during more peaceful times he’d sometimes join the little sessions Burnish teachers and professors would hold for everyone who’s interested. He mostly breezes through his language classes and finds an unexpected interest in math and science. Many other inmates seem to often bemoan the latter two, claiming it’s too complicated and it isn’t like they’d have to use most of it in daily life. Lio can’t completely disagree, but he finds that he simply enjoys seeing the flow of logic in things. It's a bit like coming up with strategies for missions, he thinks.

History, though. Lio really hates studying history. He takes to solving math questions at the back of the room in every class.

Life gets mundane once he settles into a routine. Lio eventually gets used to more of it: waking up early in the morning, the cold showers, the way his muscles would be screaming in pain by the time he’s back from construction work. The voices of the nighttime newscasters and his tutors, the uncomfortable hardness of the mattress he sleeps on, the rough callouses that’s formed across his fingers and palms. Even Galo’s presence at the end of his shifts and the comfort he can’t help but find from it. Lio gets used to them all.

And it’s when he’s waiting for sleep while picking at his callouses one night, around half a year since he first arrived, that he realizes he’s somewhat starting to enjoy himself.

Which, is absolutely ironic, considering he’s pretty much in just a slightly more lenient version of jail. But it’s true. Because despite how hard Lio always tries to convince others and himself that he’s strong enough to protect everyone, he’d lived a life of constant fear. The Freeze Force could show up any moment and they could be outnumbered, someone could grow desperate and betray them to the government. Lio has always yearned this sort of peace deep down, this sort of moments where he doesn’t have to be constantly on his toes.

But it’s also because he’s lived the life he had for so long that he’s sometimes so restless he’s tempted to just start. Screaming.

It doesn’t help that the same bastard who’s been taunting him from day one is still constantly trying to get on his nerves. He doesn’t even remember his inmate number; just remembering how he sounds like is the most he can be bothered with. Lio can easily ignore the bullshit he spouts on the daily even if it’s the first goddamn thing he has to hear in the morning, but it’s when things get physical that he feels tested.

He could still bear the childish tripping, the supposedly “friendly” pats against his back that leave bruises on his skin. He can even overlook pettier things that the guards easily dismiss like water deliberately spilled over him and the “accidental” bumps that send his food tray clattering across the floor. All these, Lio could clench his teeth, take a deep breath, and just walk away.

And then the groping begins.

It's a slip on Lio’s part as well. He shouldn’t have given him the reaction he sought, shouldn’t have wheeled around and glared at him with so much hatred that if he was still hosting Promare flames the bastard wouldn’t even have ashes left of him to burn. It's just touching; it isn’t a big deal. Lio has handled so many of the same kind of scum over the years. It shouldn’t be a big deal.

“What? Not gonna set me on fire, filthy Burnish?”

But he had never been this constrained. The frustration and annoyance had slowly built up. The fire within Lio had never belonged solely to the Promare. He feels it burning now, boiling in the pit of his stomach as every nerve in his body demands for any sort of physical retaliation.

The willpower it takes to refuse answering to them is nothing short of insane.

“Do not. Touch me,” Lio seethes, voice cold as ice and tone sharp as a razor. The bastard takes a step back, seemingly unnerved by his reaction after getting used to his passiveness. He quickly gathers himself, though, and manages to muster a pathetic smirk.

“You don’t have your flames anymore, Fotia,” he attempts to taunt. “Don’t bother acting high and mighty when you’re just as powerless as the rest of us here.”

“Flames?” Lio scoffs, grabbing him by the collar and gripping so hard that the fabric burns against his knuckles. “I don’t need them to break your fingers if you dare lay hands on me ever again.”

Bastard’s eyes widen, scanning frantically around the hallway at the inmates who are simply staring in silence. “Y-You wouldn’t dare!”

“And you wouldn’t want to try me,” Lio promises, releasing him with a shove that sends him falling on his butt. He doesn’t wait for him to get back up, storming off before he loses even more control of his temper.

Lio keeps his eyes on the floor as he navigates his way back to his cell, adrenaline still roaring in his ears. The tiny room offers little comfort besides the lock clicking in place for curfew when the sensors detect his presence. Lio’s hands are still shaking, disgust crawling across his skin like a swarm of persistent insects. He wets a piece of cloth at the sink and proceeds to scrub his legs and thighs raw.

Until all that’s left is a sting that doesn’t feel like a bastard’s touch.

His time in detention is a punishment. Lio isn’t allowed to forget that.

[chubbyooo]

Blurred Lines: Cursed Past Chapter 46 - Perspective

let’s get right back into that writing spirit with the continuation of last time

After a bad panic attack Kyradia wakes up not where she expected with a strange ally

Kyradia felt her head brush against something soft as she opened her eyes, she frowned what had just happened? where was she? She looked around she could see the trees and hills of Odessen how had she gotten out here? She turned to see the large stocky form of a sith pureblood sitting there meditating, Kyradia thought he looked farmiliar he had greying short slicked back hair and long jedi robes.

After a few seconds of silence he turned around with a bright smile “ah you’re awake that’s good” Kyradia frowned she definitely recognised him but from where

she had to ask even if it was rude “um who are you and uh how did I get here” she’d been in the med bay healing up how did she make it here

the pureblood continued smiling “well it’s a shame you don’t remember me, to clear that mystery up it’s Dzûsa the hero of Tython” Kyradia’s eyes widened of course it was wow he had gotten old “and after your little spill I thought I’d bring you somewhere that I like to use to calm down” little spill? 

Suddenly it all came flooding back she had told Ashara about Ossus and she’d disappeared she looked around frantically how would she find her now “I’m uh sorry Dzûsa but I can’t stay I’ve gotta go find my friend she’s rather upset” Dzûsa’s expression didn’t change 

he nodded “yes she seemed pretty upset when I saw her” Kyradia was only half listening as she was still looking around

Kyradia stammered “wait you know where she is? please please tell me” Kyradia started breathing heavily 

Dzûsa took a deep breath “here’s the deal I’ll tell you if you take a second, think things through and let me help you calm down” Kyradia grimaced was this jedi blackmailing her into therapy.

Kyradia sat down in a huff “fine!” Dzûsa smiled seemingly satisfied with the arrangement 

Dzûsa turned to her “so Kyradia what is the issue with the Ashara situation” Kyradia played with her hair awkwardly did she really have to do this

Kyradia sighed “well I uh made a mistake that she disapproves of and now she’s super mad at me” hopefully that was enough 

Dzûsa raised his eyebrow “Kyradia I’m going to need more than that” damn it what if he was mad too

Kyradia held her arm “well I kinda helped Darth Malgus remove the jedi presence from Ossus” Dzûsa nodded Kyradia couldn’t tell if he was angry he was so emotive last time she saw him but now he was so calm

“hmmm yes that does make sense why she would be mad” Kyradia was shocked Dzûsa didn’t seem mad at all but jedi was is whole thing

Kyradia stammered “um aren’t you upset about what I did” Dzûsa smiled shaking his head

he let out a little hearty chuckle “not particularly the Jedi are just another group of force users with a different name, the faction is not important it’s those within it who rise above like Lana and well you” Kyradia felt a small well of pride even if it wasn’t deserved, Dzûsa chuckled “and the jedi always find a way to survive I’m not worried”

Kyradia was taken aback he didn’t even care “um uh thanks for forgiving me I’m not sure Ashara will have the uh same view” Dzûsa cocked his head with a sympathetic smile

“Kyradia I’ve been forgiven for doing much worse” Kyradia frowned really Dzûsa the straight edge jedi he chuckled as he saw her expression “I’m assuming you don’t know my history, I was a sith prodigy back in the great galactic war I did plenty of awful things, I left my family and everything behind and those jedi still forgave me” Kyradia was shocked she’d never bothered to learn about the hero of Tython was he really once a sith? and a GGW one?

Kyradia looked at the floor “the thing is I don’t think I deserve to be forgiven” Dzûsa looked at Kyradia with an understanding smile

he put his hand on her shoulder “everyone deserves to be forgiven Kyradia even if they don’t believe it, a very smart blond taught me that” Kyradia chuckled she forgot he was Lana’s squeeze no wonder she was so cheerful earlier 

Kyradia took a deep breath “uh thanks Dzûsa I think that helped” Kyradia went to stand but Dzûsa stopped her damn it more really?

Dzûsa smiled “just one more thing Kyradia I want you to calm down so I’m gonna teach you a little technique” Kyradia nodded ok that wasn’t so bad if it got her the information “close your eyes and try to focus on something you have a connection to, reach out see if you can find it” Kyradia frowned that sounded kinda hard “if it doesn’t work no issue it should help your mind get perspective” Kyradia supposed it couldn’t hurt. She closed her eyes what should she focus on? something easy something she held close, what about her old nexu teeth necklace that’d do. 

She focussed reaching out as she felt her vision shift across the stars she assumed heading to Dathomir that’s the last place she’d seen it but to her surprise it went to a different planet on what seemed like a transport ship. She frowned confused suddenly losing the connection and opening her eyes she had to admit she felt calmer.

Dzûsa smiled “did that help” Kyradia nodded she had to admit she felt calmer admittedly a little angry about whoever nicked her necklace

Kyradia turned to Dzûsa “can I pleease know where Ashara is?” Dzûsa’s gave a wide grin nodding

“yeah she’s just over that ridge” Kyradia sighed of course she should’ve know

Dzûsa chuckled to himself “good luck Kyradia and I wouldn’t mind doing this again if you ever need it” Kyradia considered the idea it wasn’t so awful

Kyradia nodded “sure why not” Dzûsa smiled letting her leave.

Kyradia rushed down the hill as quick as her injured stomach would let her until she could see Ashara sitting on a log crying. Kyradia felt so awful why had she kept it from her so long how could she have been so inconsiderate, Kyradia knew how her impulses. Kyradia shuffled up quietly sitting down opposite Ashara.

She didn’t say anything until Ashara looked up and saw her, Ashara’s face was covered in tears as she stammered “h-how do I keep f-falling for it” Kyradia sighed letting Ashara say her peace “I-I mean every time y-you say you’ve changed and I just blindly follow you believing everything you say as you manipulate me again” Kyradia knew she was right but she really wasn’t trying to this time

Kyradia sighed “Ashara I-I promise this time I really just wanted to see you” that was the truth she knew it was 

Ashara frowned her sadness turning to anger “then why didn’t you tell me” Kyradia had no right answer for that how could she? she’d messed up so bad

Kyradia stammered “I told you I was scared of what you would say I-I-I’m so sorry it was a terrible thing to do the Jedi didn’t deserve that” Kyradia had never agreed with Jedi methods but still she shouldn’t have taken such pleasure in it

Ashara grimaced “You think I give a FUCK about the jedi, you used me as your personal ‘oh I’m not such a bad person’ buffer to feel BETTER about your fight with Kavaraa” Kyradia’s eyes widened was that really what she had done? “you don’t talk to me for like a year after our reunion and suddenly you want to SEE me all I was to you was away to feel better about the decision YOU regret”

Kyradia was at a loss for words she didn’t even realise but she was totally right that was what she’d done even if she hadn’t realised “Ashara I-I swear if I did that I didn’t mean to seriously as far as I was concerned it was unrelated” she could see the tears welling up in Ashara’s eyes again

“but it wasn’t Kyradia you know it wasn’t you used me for a purpose and only for that, fuck every time you just manipulate me for your purposes” she took a moment to compose herself “and I always fall for it because apparently that’s my lot in life to be a stupid sucker” Kyradia had no idea what to do all she wanted was to do whatever she could to help her

Kyradia took a deep breath “I’m sorry Ashara I’m so so sorry I understand if you hate me and never want to see me again” Ashara’s anger melted as she began to sob again

Ashara looked at her solemnly “Kyradia, you know you ruined my life right?” Kyradia felt the question hit her like a ton of bricks

She took a deep breath “yeah I know” it was the only fair answer she could give really

Ashara tried her best to compose herself “like I had promise as a Jedi and could’ve done great things but now I’m just some Jedi who’s best friend is a sith who they hate” she took a long sigh “but somehow she always helps them because she’s too invested with the idea they could be better, the idea that maybe she didn’t throw her life away” Kyradia felt awful she had no idea Ashara had been going through this since they met.

Kyradia had to do this it was the only fair thing “well I can think of two solutions either you keep helping them try to be better and one day they might be an actual decent person, or you leave and the sith won’t stop you for fear of manipulating the jedi further” she looked at Ashara dead in the eyes Kyradia was trying her hardest to keep herself together, please please choose the first option.

Ashara looked distraught tears covering her face as she stared back, after a long minute she stood up and began to walk away. Kyradia watched as she walked out of her view, she didn’t blame her why would she want to stay Ashara had been right she was just manipulating her so she could feel better about her own shitty decisions. She hoped with every part of her she would come back but knew Ashara wouldn’t want to stay with a bitch like her, Kyradia put her head against her knees and softly began to cry...

[nomadmilk]

Big Break (Peter Parker x F!Reader) - PART 2

Summary: It’s difficult working as CEO of Stark Industries, even if it was temporary. Stress has gotten the better of you, and so has Parker’s. Together, somehow, you guys find a way to escape your busy work lives.

Total Word Count: 10838 (Split into parts).

RATING: T+

Warnings: Fluff. Mild swearing. Mild sexual suggestive themes... Peter being his adorkable self

Author’s Note: Work is definitely going to keep me busy... I’ve been writing nonstop, and I’ve used up a day just to recharge... But I made sushi today, so that’s pretty cool... Also, thank you for reading ☺️ And, enjoy!!

You made a promise to Pepper as an assistant to make sure everything remains the same when she gets back. The company needed to run as if she hadn’t left her post. You made sure Happy was up to par with security checks and the deliveries, anything that needed to be signed was given straight to Mrs Stark with a response warning of up to a week, you directed board meetings and had to shut all the smirking members up with your ability to actually run a company.

Well, that, and Tony Stark seems to occasionally be eavesdropping to make sure you weren’t upset by any of them. And even when he misread the situation, he’d appear in a Skype call just to check in.

He trusts you, not everyone else.

It wasn’t just businessmen that he was wary of. He invited you to his garage for a short talk. You thought it was to remind you about maintenance with his cars, but something else was concerning him.

“Could you do one more thing for me?” He asked. You shifted in your seat. “Could you look after him?”

“The… baby?” You answered. A silly response when you looked back on it.

“No. Peter Parker. Could you make sure he’s not, y’know, doing something stupid.”

“Oh. Um. Yes, of course.” You coughed. “I’m sorry, but what-what does this entail?”

As the months went, and the Starks went on a break, you gradually learnt what taking care of Peter Parker was.

You were walking with him. It’s about four in the afternoon, but it is Winter so New York’s street lights were bright against the jet sky, and the breeze was making the night colder than it should be. Peter wasn’t smart about what he wore so he was beside you shivering every so often. You chuckled every time you offered him a resolve.

Peter was stubborn in the most particular times, but you knew a couple of techniques to loosen him up.

“The shops haven’t closed yet, Peter, we could get you a scarf and hat and gloves-“

“No, I’m okay, really-“

“They might give you an Avenger’s discount.”

Peter rolled his eyes, hedging away from laughing. “What are we doing out here?”

You step in front of him, and the gleam in your eyes set him at ease. He’s nervous about what you’re going to say, but your expression makes his irritation with the cold dissipate. You were appropriately layered; a thick, large blazer coat, kept you so warm that there was a pink hue to your cheeks. Peter has to remind himself that this outing was still a professional ordeal for the both of you; he doesn’t want to ruin that. Your work heels were swapped to some trainers that were left in your office locker, but looked odd against your blouse and pencil skirt. Peter found you adorable, but you didn’t need to know that either.

… Was this a date?

“We’re here.”

There’s a pause before he rips his eyes off of you to pay attention. You two stood in front of an all-night amusement and arcade building, still blearing with neon lights. Might not be the best for Peter’s senses, but the look of wonder it gave him was priceless.

“Used to come here when I was younger.” You began. “They have the usual zombie shooters, and normal water shooters, and whack-a-moles...”

Another gust of wind blew against your backs, and you felt a drop of rain on your face.

“Has a couple gems in there too.”

“Like what?” Peter asked.

“Galaga. Space Invaders… There used to be a Super Mario, but I think that got unplugged. Oh! They even have Tetris. The non-flashy kind.”

Droplets began landing on Peter’s quaffed locks. Why was he hesitating? Those titles were temptation enough. He must be still worrying about the suit, or his responsibilities to the Avengers, or maybe a couple of personal projects. You see his brown irises look at you, then back behind him.

As the rain starts to pour, you lead him towards a decision. He’s slightly startled as you took him by the hands. Whether or not it was your smile again, or the way your hands felt small in his, he didn’t know how to react but to follow you. “Come on, Peter. I promise everything that you’ve been working on will still be there when we get back-“

“Y/N-“

“And,” you continue, “there’s a Duckhunt high score just waiting to be beat.”

Peter bites the bait finally grinning from ear-to-ear. You cheer, and this makes him more eager to go inside. “Fine, fine, a couple of hours. Tops.”

This was the first time that you and Peter spent time together out of hours. When you started your job, you guys would talk about agendas on everything going on the Avengers compound. Eventually, when Pepper was nearing her maternity leave, after making sure you were thoroughly taught the processes of Stark industries, she handed the reigns to you. The workload became strenuous. Despite this, meeting Peter Parker became a regular event, especially when Tony let Peter take over his responsibilities. You always wanted to hang out with Peter, without the other suited colleagues around the corner or tasks hindering the time, but it wasn’t anything high on your priority list. It was just nice chatting with him, especially with everyone else ten years, or more, your senior.

Now, here you two were spraying water at a screen with monsters that melt from the touch of it, and laughing at the probability on who could get the toy frog with a hat out of the claw machine. It was nice seeing him laugh, as you usually meet him with his bewildered visage. It’s a refreshing, and delightful change. He’s great-looking with a smile.

After a while, it wasn’t you dragging Peter all over the place, it was him ushering you over to play indoor mini adventure golf.

You won, of course. That, and Peter kept having his hands stuck to the putter.

You both got back to the claw machine with the frog in it. He bowed to you in your victory.

“As your prize, Lady Y/N, “ Peter pronounced his words, “I will win you this most prestigious reward.”

“Oh, Sir Parker,” you gasp, “this is a dangerous feat. How could you possibly-“

“Fear not, my lady, anything is possible for you.”

You had to clear your throat for that comment, watching him place his palms on the joystick and buttons of the claw machine. As you wished him luck, he inserts a quarter, and the machine chimes to life. He was concentrating on the claw, his hands clammy but still functioning on the control panel. You observe the claw yourself; you see it go left, swing a little, and come towards the two of you. You hear a tap of a button, and the claw descends down.

“Oh my, God, Peter, I think you might just get it.”

He glances to the side of him, distracted by you. Your eyes hadn’t noticed him, as yours were still intent on the toy frog. His face wasn’t far away from yours, and you were just biting your bottom lip slightly. You let go of it, and Peter saw your mouth return to its full plump size.

He lost the frog.

You cursed under your breath. “So close! We cannot free them today, my knight.”

Noticing the silence, you face him. He’s still staring at your lips.

“Peter?”

He snaps out of his trance, laughing uncertainly, “Sorry, I couldn’t get it for you.”

His bashfulness makes you laugh. For a superhero, he still has a knack for being awkward. “It’s not a problem, Peter.”

“Thank you, Y/N.”

“For what?”

“This.” His head gestures to the machine in front of him, a emoticon flashing bright teeth from the background of it. “I’ve just been too overworked. I know I’ve been doing his job for a while, but Mr Stark is retiring, he wants me to step up, and I want to, it’s just-… What if I’m not right for the job? If I can’t do it, I mean, I don’t want to disappoint anyone.”

“There’s a lot of pressure on you, but you’ll get there.” You say, your lips in a hopeful simper. “I’m sure he doesn’t want you to rush, he just wants you to be ready. I mean, if you have that much doubt, you do know you can back out whenever. Tony’ll understand.”

“I don’t want to back out from this.”

“So, even with the pressure, and the choice of quitting, you want to stay?”

You see Peter take a deep breath, and survey you, a knowing look on your face. You knew Peter’s philosophy of power and responsibility all too well.

“You’re too good for this world, Peter.” You brush a hair away, glancing at him. “And, I just, uh, wanted to say – even with everything else going on – it’s been really great to spend time with you.”

“Yeah.” He said. “It’s been awesome.”

“Have you eaten today? There’s a diner nearby we can go to.”

His Spidey senses tingled. “Erm. It’s still raining.”

You point your thumb to a candy machine, smirking. “So you want me to suck on a lollipop because you’re afraid of a little rain?”

Peter blinked. His heart began racing. Why’d he have to think about you sucking on-

“Do they have pancakes?” Was all Peter could muster.

[cookinguptales]

So while I was in NYC, I got to see Mean Girls, Spongebob Squarepants, and Anastasia. It was really a combination of lottery winnings and tkts, though I did splurge and get myself the Mean Girls ticket ahead of time. Despite how I got the rest of the tickets, I actually had pretty good seats at all the shows! So that part was nice.

More in-depth thoughts under a cut, but can I just say how weird it is that like... I think I had the most fun at Spongebob? I only went bc I won the lottery but like. I genuinely enjoyed that show. lol. Reminds me of when I went to see Shrek: The Musical on a lark with my friend, and we were shocked that it’s actually a great show.

I saw Spongebob first, an evening show. It was also my most high-pain day, so I have to admit that something funny and a little stupid (with a good heart) was probably exactly what I needed. The music was fun and catchy (not a shock, I guess, considering the people they got to do music for them) and the actors did a really spectacular job. I realized after coming home that I had some different actors than appear on the recording, but I liked my actors more. The Mr. Krabs I saw sounded so spot-on that it was a little creepy, lol, and our Plankton was super fun. I was kind of shocked when the guy who played Squidward started talking in a straight-up British accent after the show, lmao.

I laughed at a lot of the jokes, and though I never really expected to see Patrick Star leading a cult, it was apparently exactly what I wanted out of my evening. Plus, it actually had some pretty good lessons for kids. Don’t turn on each other and scapegoat immigrants when bad things happen, think for yourselves and always try to fix problems rather than running away from them, sometimes people say things that sound profound but won’t actually help you, diversity is valuable… I think it kind of veered into a trope I’m not in love with (immigrants are great because they’re useful) but I think it was also good for kids to see a character who was female (and played by a black woman) who was fantastic at science, kind, determined, and the one who ultimately saves the day. I also liked that the show was clear that her pain and wariness didn’t go away just because people started accepting her again. I think it managed to go in on some really good lessons without ever feeling preachy about it.

Plus, again, the show was just super fun. I love how it played with the space (like the way the actors kept interacting with the band and the conductor) and the jokes were genuinely funny. Patchy wandering around and trying to crash the show was great. The songs were catchy and fun and it was really cohesively done. Also, I think it really managed to nail the feeling of the characters and this underwater world without being too on-the-nose. (I’m looking at you, Little Mermaid.)

Was it the deepest, most memorable show I’ve ever seen? No. But it was a lot of fun, and fun is frankly what I needed right then.

Next, I saw Mean Girls. I’ll admit that my enjoyment of this show was marred by a couple things. It’s not the most accessible theater (I never did get to see the merch booth…) and the lead actress was out. There was a standby actress who could play like… 6-7 different characters? And I was really ??? when I saw that, like. There were really two options. Either she’s the best actress on earth, who can totally transform herself so she can play such diverse roles… or she’s generic af. Unfortunately, she turned out to be the latter. Like, don’t get me wrong! She was technically proficient and could sing really well! She just didn’t feel like Cady. There was something missing there, y’know? Some spark or charisma. She was just boring to watch, which kind of dampened the whole show. I overheard that it was her first time playing Cady, though, so idk. Maybe she was just nervous.

That aside, though, I did enjoy the show! It was a Wednesday (so I did wear pink) and it had a lot of the heart of the movie. It was really funny, and I liked how Janice and Damien were used to frame the show. They made for great, hilarious narrators. I really enjoyed most of the songs, too. Some were a little forgettable, I’ll admit, but others were really touching (particularly Gretchen’s solos) or super funny. Damien sings a whole song about how sometimes you just need to STOP and I loved it. The song was hilarious. The script itself was packed with good stuff. There were great jokes and good social commentary, more depth for some of the forgotten side characters and some really touching moments.

Plus, Cady aside, the rest of the actors did a tremendous job. My one gripe with the original movie is that… idk, the actress who played Regina George never quite felt like she could actually be a queen bee in a real school. Is that weird to say? The other girls around her just felt prettier and more charismatic, so it was hard to buy that she would actually be in charge. The Regina in the musical, though? Holy shit, you feel it. That woman could walk through Times Square and every eye would be on her. She did an absolutely fantastic job with Regina, and the other huge standouts to me were Gretchen and Janice. Just excellent, excellent jobs all around. I really love how much time the show gave to Gretchen so you could really get where she was coming from. Get that poor girl a therapist, honestly.

I think part of the problem is that, all things considered, it’s difficult not to compare Mean Girls to Heathers. And frankly, Heathers is a better show, imo. They’re both good! But I do sort of feel like Mean Girls could’ve gone in a little harder, and its music wasn’t nearly as memorable as Heathers’s. That said, like Heathers, Mean Girls: The Musical has a LOT more potential for f/f than the movie. lmao. And isn’t that really what we’re all here for?

(I mean no, probably not, but it’s what I’m here for.)

The third show I saw was Anastasia, and I gotta admit it. I’m shocked how much I didn’t like Anastasia. I’ve been wanting to see it for ages because that movie was my childhood, but I bounced hard off that show. Like I was kind of hanging in there for the first act, but I was literally wishing I could check my watch during the second act. Plus we had an u/s for Dmitri and he was. Not fabulous. I always feel bad saying that about understudies but like. He was……… not fabulous. So the criticisms I have going forward about Dmitri in the show might be colored by that. Bear with me.

Now, the show is super different from the movie. And I understand why they chose to go for realism rather than fantasy, but I disagree with that choice very, very firmly. Not only did it make the whole show a real fucking downer, but like… I feel like when you make movies about real people, you either have to go completely realistic or go real fucking far off the deep end. Like the movie really went in on the near-mythic stature that Anastasia and Rasputin had in history and folklore during that period. It went in hard with magic and zombies and had a real fairy tale feeling that only really worked because of the wild tales people were already telling about the historical personages. No one watched the animated movie about Anastasia and went “wow, I bet that’s just like real life”.

The show decided that they wanted to be more realistic and talk about like. God, execution of political prisoners and people starving in the streets and refugees and just generally the politics of Leningrad. So not only was that fucking depressing, but it really pulled things back to be like… If you’re being all realistic about this, shouldn’t you be more realistic about the real life people you’re using for this story? This isn’t how Anastasia’s life went, and I can buy that in a fantasy what if? AU, but when you’re aiming for gritty realism, then telling this story about a person who was executed (and yes, we now know she was executed) is just… It feels disrespectful, y’know?

Plus once you start bringing in the real politics of the world, I’m going to start examining the characters through a real historical lens. A love triangle is annoying and unnecessary anyway, but you managed to make it fucking creepy by having this guy stalk her after his dad killed her entire family, and while he’s still working for an oppressive regime. That’s not romantic! But you also managed to fuck up royally by making that actor far more handsome and charismatic, not to mention a much better singer, than the actual love interest!

Like! Dmitri only barely worked in the movie, y’know? You have to straddle such a fine, fine line with a lovable con man. If you take out the lovable, he’s just a fucking con man. And in the show, he just felt like a con man. Again, the fact that the u/s couldn’t sing all that well (he went sour several times and sometimes sounded just like Ernie, of Sesame Street, which is kind of the opposite of sexy) did not help things. But he was also just a fucking dick to Anya and it was difficult to tell why she liked him, other than the writing’s new decision to make her basically a street urchin like him. (As in, she’d been living on the street for many years previous to the show’s start — he also never worked in the palace and saved her life in the musical; it was never actually stated how she escaped in the musical.)

The actress who played Anya did an amazing job, but the writing for her character was pretty ??? most of the time. Like I get that you want to make her feisty (and why did you choose AN ATTEMPTED RAPE TO DISPLAY HER STRENGTH?) but if she’s really so street smart, why does she constantly make bizarre decisions? Why does she want to go to Paris if she doesn’t have the Together In Paris necklace? Why is she having a weird love triangle between a man who verbally abuses her and a government official who wants her dead? WHY DID YOU MAKE IT CLEAR THAT SHE HAD A DOG AND THE DOG IS DEAD? Poor Pooka!

Speaking of people I can’t root for knowing actual historical fact, they changed Sophie into an ex-Russian dilettante named Lily who spends all her time complaining that she used to be rich af in Russia and it’s so sad that all of the Russian elite had to give up their major Russian fortunes so they could… have minor French fortunes and cushy jobs. Like every time they started reminiscing about the good ol’ days in Russia, I was just like “oh right, that’s why they had a revolution, eat the fucking rich”. Like the new background they made up just made me despise her and all her friends.

They also made Anastasia’s grandma kind of a bitch. You’re really kind of forcibly reminded how awful monarchies can be whenever she talks about politics! And that cute, short scene in the movie where she finally meets Anya? Drawn out to like a half hour of this old woman rambling about how awful the world is and how she hates everyone and Anya is just a tricksy bitch. Fun times for all!

Plus like. I don’t remember a single song from the musical that wasn’t in the movie. I hate that they took out all of the magic and the talking animals and Rasputin (how did they never even mention the HISTORICAL one?) and they just had to rub it in by cannibalizing In The Dark of The Night and turning it into a depressing-ass song about political refugees who were fleeing Russia and would never see it again. (Note: the singer of this song was shot in the head by Russian authorities shortly after singing it.)

The only thing the musical really did was make me so sad for these people who had a revolution because their rulers were deeply corrupt and used the lives of the poor like pawns, and then had an equally corrupt government regime move in. The people were starving either way! And the musical trying to romanticize all that (they kind of wanted to acknowledge the historical crimes but still make me like the people who caused the problems??) just felt awful. They tried to work this story in with the real historical timeline by being like YEAH SHE WAS REAL AND THEY REUNITED BUT THEN SHE DECIDED TO LEAVE AND NEVER TELL ANYONE WHO SHE WAS AGAIN SO THE CREEP IN THE GOVERNMENT DIDN’T GET IN TROUBLE AND NO ONE EVER KNEW THAT THE REAL ANASTASIA WAS ALIVE. Like what. No. They found her fucking corpse. You can’t try to follow real life and have her actually be Anastasia. You can’t have your cake and eat it too! Do you want to make a musical about the plight of the Russians during this time period, or do you want to write a fairy tale? You can’t do both! All you’ve managed to do is play out some bad history and make me feel kind of gross.

….and boring music, questionable politics, and fuckin dreariness aside, the writing was just bad. The second act dragged on and on and on because they would never say in a minute what they could say in an hour. I was kind of bored and annoyed both. If you’re going to change a story and add an hour and a half of material, it better be good material. And it wasn’t. The only bright spots for me were the spectacular costumes (really gorgeous), the interesting sets, and the woman who plays Anastasia.

Other than that, I was not thrilled. All it did was make me want to go watch the ding-dang movie so I could just see the ding-dang bat.

[jacquelineshyde]

was there any indication that hyde still loved jackie in season 8? i only was able to watch like 4 episodes and they werent in order. I think i just saw the first two, the valentines day ep and the finale.

I saw the first episode, the one where Jackie falls and gets super dirty and Hyde is like 3% nice to her, and the finale, so I’m not sure I can answer this as good as one can do. Except that I know for spoilers and conversations with my friends a few things.

Okay, let’s put on the heart eyes to talk about this shit. Here comes the long ass meta after the cut, pals!

During the first episode, Hyde, after -thank god- punching Kelso like he has wanted for a month (because of the whole Chicago thing), actually sits and listen to Jackie when he comes back from Vegas. 

He looks at her and says he isn’t ready to get married, which makes me believe he was still willing to try again with her. This makes Jackie happy, too. She has been waiting for him to come back since that night, and we see her spark on happiness and hope after he says that.

We also get confirmation that, sadly, this is everything Jackie wanted: maybe. Not a full yes, not a promise, just a lame maybe. He seems ok with that too, and that’s the exact moment when Samantha appears. Because of course.

After that, we see Jackie mad at all that has happened. Which is strange. She should be crying, she just lost the love of her life to some random stripper #4 that has nothing especial on her (which is the writers fault) and that is only there to insult her (literally).

Later, after Jackie somehow develops ‘feelings’ for Fez, this conversation takes place:

(x)

This pains me so much, dude. Mostly because look. at. his. face.

He seems to be in so much pain, it’s ridiculous. 

I thank Danny Masterson for the way he decided to play this whole thing. This is more likely his pained face at having to say such things at a relationship everyone knows was terrible, but it gives us a big chance at Subtext™, something I love to meta about in this show.

So, Hyde lets Jackie know he is aware of her new found feelings for Fez. She isn’t worried about it, she’s annoyed. She knows he is going to make fun of her because that’s all he does nowdays. He has stopped being this smart and deep man she loved, and has come back to be the jerk that lives in a basement.

Jackie is truly surprised when he says he thinks it’s a good thing. But look at his face, look how pained he is. This gift from Danny gaves us room to interpretate this as him letting her go, him knowing there’s no turning back now. She is into someone else, someone he thinks it’s a good guy and, more important, “And I think if he makes you happy, that’s what you should do”.

HA. “If he makes you happy, that’s what you should do”. HA-HA. 

You can also take this as him realizing he has lost her forever and he is not able to make her happy ever again. Not only because she wants someone else but because he fucked up, big time, and has been a complete asshole to her for so long by now, there’s no way he could get back what is now lost forever.

See, kids? That’s what happens when you are an asshole to the girl you love, you fucking lose her.

I also want to talk about the fact that Hyde is talking flowers about Fez. He, of course, cares and loves his friend. He does. But he also knows him. And he knows Fez is an idiot and only sees women as prizes, that’s the man has become after season 4, and that’s the man Jackie ends up with. There’s no way Hyde would actually say something like that.

To me, it’s more like he has the impression that Fez has become better than him. Any man is better than him at this point! He has become his stepfather, and his mother, and every single uncle that ever disrespected him and his mother when he was a kid. 

He has become the monster that lives at his childhood safe place, the one he primised he would never do. So yeah, Fez is a good guy that makes Jackie happy. Fez is the guy that is good for her and makes her happy. Fez is good, makes her happy. Fez gives her what he can’t give her, he is good and makes her happy. He isn’t a good guy, he doesn’t make her happy anymore. 

Anyway, another episode that gave us Subtext™ is the one in which the “gang” gets lost in the woods, and Hyde spend part of the episode half making fun of Jackie and half helping her during their long walk.

She falls and he laughs. Wait, I dind’t say it correctly. She falls from a fucking cliff AND HE LAUGHS. HE LAUGHS. I FUCKING HATE THIS SEASON FOR MAKING HYDE INTO SUCH AN ASSHOLE. Anyway, back to the meta…

One can tell he wants to help her at the end of the day (night in this case?) because he cares about her. 

He fucking does. 

She is the literal love of his life. Besides, feelings as strong as theirs just doesn’t go away like that. Just because he married a total stranger he angry fucked for a month while drunk (see how disgusting, unhealthy and even sexist this is? Well, these writers thought it was a good idea) doesn’t mean he has no feelings for Jackie anymore.

In fact, thinking about that, that he angry fucked someone he ended up marrying after getting hurt by her, already tells you a lot. 

Why would he get married to a stranger? What was on his mind? I’ll tell you what, Jackie. And the reason he went all the way to Chicago. And the answer he told Eric he had, his damn decision Jackie never got to hear.

That is a lot of subtext, actually.

With better writing, heart eyes, and one hell of good characterization and character development, we cold had have something way better.

And for something better that should be your canon, you need to read Made Bare by MistyMountainHop. 

This fanfic is my canon season 8 and everyone needs to read it. It has delicious Subtext™ taking place in s8 and beyond the crap. It’s perfect.

[team-skull-admin]

My favorite 40 games of all-time

Made an arbitrary list of my favorite games of all-time cause I wanted to figure out where Breath of the Wild is on it. It’s, uh, pretty high. Assload of text below the break.

40: Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow I'm not the world's biggest Symphony of the Night fan (outside of the incredible soundtrack) and I think this is where Iga's seamless platformers found their footing.

39: Call of Juarez: Gunslinger I love goofy, experimental games like this and Far Cry: Blood Dragon, but I think the schtick in this (an unreliable narrator bragging about their heroic exploits) works better than Blood Dragon's dorky 80s nostalgia.

38: Rayman Origins A beautiful platformer with incredible level design. The music for the diabolical secret level is seared into my memory.

37: Cibele A short, story-centric indie game that captures the essence of playing MMOs in the mid-2000s and long-distance relationships. The awkward conversations in this game made me think about my WoW years for an entire weekend.

36: Mario Kart Wii It's not technically the "best" Mario Kart, but I actually enjoyed the motorcycles and I have fond memories of crushing my brother while we downed beers and talked shit.

35: Guild of Dungeoneering I'm usually not super into "We made X game, but added CARDS!" even though I love card games, but they nailed the loop here. I vaguely remember one of the decks being super busted, though.

34: Tropico 4 Adding a political slant to Sim City by making you the leader of a banana republic was just the slant to that formula I was looking for, and I lost a weekend circa New Year's '13 just delving into this hard.

33: Gran Turismo 2 My brother bought a PS1 off a friend when they upgraded to a PS2, and I grabbed a copy of this cheaply at the local EB Games. Once I wrapped my mind around the simulation, upgrading cars and havin fun with them here might have more to do with me being somewhat of a car person than anything else.

32: Metal Gear Solid 4 I should really put the whole series on here, but MGS4 deserves special note for making the core stealth actually fun and somehow tying all the loose ends of the insane plot together while dialing up the insanity even further.

31: Sim City 2000 I figured out how to make a 50,000 person city when I was like, 8. I still have no fucking idea how I did this. It took me till my 20s to crack 100k.

30: Pokemon Black/White People are torn on this game, but the contentious design decision to hide the old Pokemon in the postgame made every new encounter incredibly exciting in a way the series hadn't been since the orignals. The writing also shows signs of the maturity that Sun/Moon would follow through with.

29: Dragon Warrior Monsters 2 I think most would deride this series as a soulless Pokemon cash-grab on the surface, but they're actually roguelikes with a crazy monster breeding system and the most rote of stories to get you into the core loop of exploring new keys to breed ever crazier monsters.

28: Diablo 3: Reaper of Souls Diablo 3 vanilla's reliance on the auction house created design issues that were hard to look past, but Blizzard abandoning it for the expansion made the game into an incredible dungeon crawler. I never laddered, but had fun for hundreds of hours chasing loot with friends.

27: Fallout 3 I'll never forget the feeling of walking out of the vault for the first time, and feeling like I could go anywhere. I also think this is the only Bethesda game that regularly pays off when exploring - weird shit like the Republic of Dave or the man stuck in the tree are fantastic rewards for poking at the less inhabited edges of the map.

26: Bassin's Black Bass featuring Hank Parker I'm honestly wondering if the rest of the world has picked up on this game's low-key genius since I saw it for 15 bucks at a retro game store recently, but this game's arcadey fishing is incredibly satisfying and snappy. It has some major, obvious, irritating mechanical issues, but the core gameplay loop is so good I don't care.

25: Middle Earth: Shadow of Mordor I still remember my nemesis. This motherfucker was right at the beginning of the game, inside the first quest area, and was like level 5 or 6, but had a defensive ability that made it harder for me to gank him easily. So he killed me. Twice. And leveled up each time, becoming a level 12 badass who could literally sniff me out when I hid. But he was weak to fire, and I lured him to a campfire and set him ablaze, getting my revenge.

24: Super Metroid I feel like most people would have this game higher on the list, but I think the controls are floaty and Meridia is overly confusing. The rest of the game is incredible and I can't believe they pulled it off on a Super Nintendo.

23: Pokemon Sun/Moon After XY and ORAS were disapointments I was cool on Pokemon, but Sun/Moon challenged a ton of series conventions and got a lot right in the process. I can't believe how deftly this game handles dysfunctional families.

22: A Link Between Worlds This was Nintendo's hit at what was to come with Zelda - a smart, experimental take on the franchise that's easily its best 2d outing.

21: Muramasa: The Demon Blade Vanillaware's magnum opus, a gorgeous Metroidvania where everything is hand-painted. The combat's loop of mixing launchers with sword management is also incredibly fun, if not particularly deep. But fuck I loved looking at it so much and it felt good.

20: The Walking Dead Only time a video game made me cry.

19: Banjo-Kazooie The only 3d collect-a-thon platformer from that era that still holds up, it combines cheeky humor and an incredible soundtrack to craft a world that's always surprising.

18: Borderlands 2 is better crafted, but I enjoyed the dry wit and more grounded guns of the first. I've replayed this like 4 times and I'm not entirely sure why, but I have a blast each time.

17: Doom (2016) Apparently the secret to making this license work in a modern context is to give Halo combat arenas a healthy dose of cocaine and play Meshuggah riffs over it. It so fucking works.

16: Saints Row: The Third I think the writing in GTA is usually sophomoric at best and its attempts at commentary are eye-roll worthy, but having a game say "FUCK IT" and just Mel Brooks that experience is such a wonderful idea. It's also hard to pull off, and SR3 totally sticks the landing (unlike the sequel).

15: Super Mario World The best traditional Mario game. I replayed it recently, and it struck me how much secret exits add to the level design versus 3, and how freed Koji Kondo is by the new hardware. The castle music's classical overture sticks out.

14: Monster Hunter 4 I liked Monster Hunter 3's various iterations but I hated swimming. Taking out swimming and replacing it  with mounting was enough for me to sink hundreds of hours. I actively avoided getting Generations because I knew it would interfere with school.

13: Mario Golf (GBC) The perfect portable game. Golf works well on the platform, and adding basic RPG hooks was enough to make a rote story totally engaging.

12: Super Mario Maker I think the real triumph of Mario Maker isn't the levels (which are usually terrible), it's how Nintendo imparted the feeling of being creative in such an easily digestible and satisfying way. It's an achievement that ascends past Mario design (which still works here) into something greater and more profound.

11: Hearthstone I fucking hate this game and I keep playing it because the Arena is like literal fucking crack and every time I have an opponent at 1 life and they beat me they can eat fucking dicks.

10: Super Mario RPG Clever writing and a strange world grabbed me way harder than Intelligent System's later Paper Mario games. It's too easy and doesn't look as slick now, but the writing still holds up.

09: Mass Effect Trilogy You can't really separate these, as the experience that makes Mass Effect great was carrying your Shepard and their decisions from one game to the next. Everyone will remember Garrus, Wrex, and co. Shame about the ending.

08: Tetris I am weirdly good at Tetris. I know what a T-Spin is. I sank hundreds of hours into it on Facebook. I don't regret it.

07: Persona 4 Describe a game to me as a mix of a J-RPG and a slice-of-life anime and I'll run to the hills, so the fact this game's sharp, mature writing and "just one more day" calendar mechanic combined into one of my favorite games of all-time is a shock. They also put in Pokemon with fucking demons, how cool is that shit?

06: Ocarina of Time I can't believe this game came out in 1998. The world is still fun to traverse, and the dungeon design (especially as an adult) still holds up at the top of action-adventure puzzle design.

05: Magic: the Gathering I wish it was less expensive otherwise it'd be higher.

04: Breath of the Wild I can't believe Nintendo reinvented the wheel so well that I'm putting the game so high on the list. Every design decision in this game is carefully considered to make exploring this iteration of Hyrule that much more satisfying. And its incredibly clever chemistry engine, where every object in the game has chemical properties that can be manipulated as well as physics, creates a ton of emergent gameplay scenarios where you're constantly asking "Can I do that?" and the game almost never lets you down.

03: World of Warcraft Sometimes I regret the 4000 hours I spent in Azeroth, but I'd have a hard time giving up the friends I made there. I could probably shred and like, speak another language though.

02: Pokemon Red I was the perfect age for Pokemon mania, and the fact that the core game was literally designed to appeal to me didn't help. I still love collecting the things and min/maxing ways to beat the Elite 4 with minimal grinding.

01: Mega Man X I think this is literally the perfect platformer. Moving X feels incredible. There's nothing in any of the levels I think is out of place. The soundtrack is a masterpiece. And the game's hidden secret is so insane you'd probably call bullshit on any kid who told it to you at recess. I'm really glad the rest of the world picked up on it after Arin Hanson did a Sequelitis about it, because I've been beating this drum for decades.

[stevethehairington]

Okay so I was tagged by @fairieswithoutwings to do one of those like “get to know me” kind of post things, which like wow, I’m surprised that I was tagged in one of these! Like I didn’t ever expect to be so it’s pretty cool! Thanks!! :)

Anyyyywayyyyssss...

Name/nickname/whatever you prefer to be called?

My friends usually just call me by my full name, Mackenzie, but sometimes they call me ‘Mack’. Some of my soccer coaches in the past have called me ‘G’ or “Gal’ because of my last name but yeah, I don’t really go by nicknames that much. Wouldn’t mind it though!

Pronouns?

She/Her :)

Age?

I’m currently 17 (a little more than 4 months away from 18 though, but who’s counting?) (Me. I’m counting. I’m definitely counting)

Fav Skam character?

This is SUCH a tough question oh man. (I love them all is that an acceptable answer? lol) Ummm... I’m gonna have to go with either Isak or Even, as cliche as it seems. When I saw Isak in season one he was this cute, adorable, little bean and I dunno, it was kinda just love at first sight lol. And then in season three, my love for him just grew and grew and grew because throughout his season we see him going through some tough shit and the way he handles most of it and becomes more aware of things and is open to learning and exploring things is very admirable. Like ofc he definitely speaks before he thinks about what he’s going to say sometimes, like the comments he makes to Eskild about gay pride, and also the comment to Even in the locker room (we all know exactly what I’m talking about here), but the thing is, he doesn’t just let them go or deny that he said those things. He actively takes responsibility for them and realizes that he messed up or said something wrong and he tries to fix it, and I think that’s really important. He does a lot of growing and learning and I just love that he’s willing to do that growing and learning. Also, I really love how despite how much he tries to make himself seem like this ‘cool’ guy, like ‘look at me I wear snapbacks and listen to ‘90s hip hop and smoke weed’, he’s really just this big loving dork who gets blushy and embarrassed and is actually really intelligent and loves biology and old memes (honestly tho boy, you gotta get updated on your meme collection it’s looking very #yike) and has a soft spot for his friends. Like I just really love Isak. 

Okay and Even. Damn, where do I begin with Even? He’s such a complex character and I actually love that so much, like there are so many different layers to him and I felt like every episode we peeled one back and found another waiting to be explored. I really really love how he’s so much more than just the love interest. Like a lot of shows bring on a character as the love interest for the main character and they’re kind of just there and don’t really have that much background to them. But with Even... oh mannnn. Boy do we get background. He’s more than just Isak’s love interest and that makes me really appreciative. I also think his mental illness was dealt with in such a wonderful way. Now, I’m no expert on mental illnesses, but I feel like they did a fantastic job at portraying one. It seemed very real and I loved how it wasn’t just boom he had an episode which we didn’t witness and everything’s suddenly better within a day. Like even I know that’s not how it is, and they didn’t do that. They showed the good and the bad and I think that made me fall in love with Even too. Seeing the good and the bad just showed that he’s not perfect, nobody is, and we all have to go through shit. It’s part of life. And that just made him seem even more real. Also, I love how as the season progressed he became more real. Like in the beginning, since we’re seeing everything through Isak’s eyes, Even kinda appears like this gorgeous ‘way outta my league’ kind of guy, like he was the epitome of cool, super untouchable, right. But then throughout the episodes that air of ‘too cool’ kinda disappeared and once again we were left with this absolute dork, who loves movies and cooking and Gabrielle, who gets insecure about things too, who isn’t as perfect as we originally thought. Like I just want to be his best friend and sit and talk with him for hours about everything under the sun (god, he would be such a good conversationalist omg. He definitely strikes me as that person that can literally talk about anything and everything that comes to mind and actually make that conversation enjoyable. Like he could probably bring up like some dumb math theorum or whatever and I’d be intrigued lol). He’s precious and needs to be protected at all costs. (Honestly I could talk about him for HOURS. Hmu if ya wanna tho lol I’d be up for it)

When did you start watching Skam?

Okay so I started watching Skam midway through season 3, so episode 6 was the first episode I watched in ‘real time’. I was on Tumblr one day (instead of doing my homework... which is kind of what I’m doing now... lol sorry AP Gov, you’re not important right now) and I was scrolling through my dash and I kept seeing a bunch of posts with these two boys cuddling together (that first clip from episode 5 you know the one ;)) and I reblogged a couple of them even though I had no idea what this show was yet, but I remember thinking to myself okay s’cute I’ll check it out. And that’s when I fell down the rabbit hole lol. No, but honestly? Best decision I ever made. I remember it was the first day of Thanksgiving break when I found this show and I watched all of season 3 as of then that night, then Tuesday night I went back and watched season 1, Wednesday I watched all of season 2, and then Thursday I rewatched season 3 so I’d be ready for the new episode on Friday. And I was Hooked™. 

When did you make your blog?

Oh god, ummm, I honestly have no idea the date (or even the year for that matter lol). I know I’ve had it a few years though. I used to be a hardcore One Direction account, I shipped Larry (not super extra about it though I was super chill), like I was so invested in that band omfg, but now I kinda don’t care what’s going on with them? Like, I just gradually stopped caring. I stopped constantly checking for updates and now when new stuff happens I’m kinda just like oh okay cool whatever. Like I’m not badmouthing them, I still enjoy their music and all, I just stopped being obsessive I suppose. Which, I’m kinda glad about tbh lol. Idk I just don’t think it was very good to be that invested. But yeah, now this blog is kinda a mosh of different stuff I like. Like rn it’s mainly Skam but I’ll post about Harry Potter or Marvel or Sherlock.

Who are you cheering for to be s4′s main?

EVEN. Oh my god you have no idea how much I want Even to be the main. Like I’m probably HELLA getting my hopes up and I’m gonna be super disappointed if it’s not him (mainly bc I’m so convinced he should be (but ofc I’m gonna be thrilled with whoever they do choose!!)) But yeah, there’s just so many reasons why he should be the main. Like I said earlier he’s a super complex character and I feel like we’ve only scratched the surface. Like there’s so many things we don’t know about him and I’m so damn curious to find out everything about him. I also think it would be really cool if we had a season from the point of view of someone with a mental illness so we could see how normal they are. Because people sometimes think that just because someone’s mentally ill or something like that that they’re totally different, but in reality they’re probably not that different from you and me. I think it would provide so much exposure for that and be super informative and helpful and just lovely, because Skam always does the loveliest job portraying things. Not to mention, he’s graduating this year and I think it would be so good to see him successfully graduate. It would show people that yes, it’s possible and yes you can do it. (I’m getting teary eyed just thinking about my tol bean graduating omg!) Alsooo, this is literally our last chance to have Even as a main. Like I said, he’s graduating this year so once this year is over he won’t be at Nissen anymore, which is kind of like a requirement of the mains sooo. (Plus I was discussing this with someone I follow and we were talking about how it would make the most sense and be a very smart move from a marketing point of view to have Even as the main because a bunch of people are super invested in him and if he’s the main it would bring a lot of viewers because of that investment) (Plus the transition to s4 would be smooth as hell). Ideally, it would be perfect if it went like this: Even for S4, Sana for S5, and Vilde for S6. Fingers crossed this is what we get!!

Who do you think is most likely to be s4′s main?

I feel like Even’s definitely got a chance. But I also think Sana does too. If it’s not Even (I’m in too deep help) I think it’ll for sure be Sana (which yessss, I love Sana omg). 

What are your main interests?

Main interests... welllll, if it’s not already obvious I love obsessing over tv shows lol. Nah, but I’m super into watching movies (not quite on Even’s level but I’m working my way up there), like marathoning is my fave. I’m super into photography. I’m in a photography class in school right now, but I love taking pictures of everything really. And I’m super happy because I just got my own camera for Hanukkah this year and I’ve been asking for the past few years so I’m so happy about that. I enjoy reading too, I’m a sucker for a good book. (recs anyone? lol) I also like to write, even though I’ve never actually sat down and written anything completely. Like seriously, look at my computer and you’ll see a million files of half written, started and abandoned fics. I’ve been trying to get myself to actually finish one but who knows if that’ll ever happen lol. Oh and I play soccer too, have been since I was 4! Definitely one of my favorite things to do! 

Something you’re always up to discuss?

Literally anyting? Like hmu I’m always open to talk about things. I love love love Harry Potter so if you ever want to talk about anything that has to do with Harry Potter I’m soo beyond down. I really enjoy talking about Literature as well. I’m in an AP Lit class this year and it’s actually my favorite class ever. We’ve read so many interesting books and I’ve learned so much and me and my pals are literally the biggest Lit nerds you’d ever find, we’ll sit and discuss our books for hours when we go out to coffee or are at lunch. Speaking of coffee, whenever me and my friends get coffee we always end up having these super deep conversations about politics or religion or things like that and those conversations are actually so enjoyable, so like if you’re an open minded person and you’re not trying to shove your belief/opinion down my throat I could definitely talk with you about those things. I think talking about politics or religion and stuff like that really helps you keep an open mind because it allows you to see things from other people’s point of view, and that’s pretty cool. 

I’m always up for making new friends, especially here, so I’m up for chatting if anyone wants to!! :))

Something you refuse to discuss?

Umm, nothing super specific is coming to mind. But when it comes to politics or religion I refuse to speak to someone about these things if they only want to explain their views/opinions and think that it’s their way or the highway and try to shove it down my throat and aren’t open to hearing what other people think. Like you don’t have to like what I’m saying and you definitely don’t have to agree, but you need to be able to listen and at least be open to hearing a different point of view. So yeah, I guess it’s not really a what I refuse to discuss but more of a who I refuse to discuss with lol.

Other favorite shows aside from Skam?

Too many. Omfg. Okay I’m hella into Criminal Minds. That show is one of my all time favorites. I actually decided that I want to study Criminal Justice and Psychology and actually become a profiler because of that lol. I just think it’s such a cool show and what they do is so interesting so yeah, that show has actually influenced my career goals haha. I also love Parks and Rec- that show is funny as hell and it’s one of those shows I’m always down to rewatch. Oh, I watched Stranger Things this year and that show is just yes. So good oh man. I love the movie Super 8 with a passion and when I watched Stranger Things I got such a Super 8 vibe which I looooved so yeah I definitely love that show and would consider it a favorite. American Horror Story is pretty awesome too, though I haven’t been that impressed with their last few seasons, still a great show though! Ooh I just started watching Sherlock this year (I watched it all in like a week oops?), love that show! Supernatural oh my god I loove that show so much! Jensen and Jared are my absolute favorites oh man. I haven’t finished the show yet I’m only about halfway through season 6 lol but I heard it was renewed for season 13 so that’s pretty cool! Some honorable mentions: How I Met Your Mother was good, I watched That ‘70s Show not that long ago, that was pretty funny, I just finished The Office. I feel like I’m missing some key shows I love but yeah that’s all I can think of right now.

Anyways, I hope some of you take the time to read this, I know I don’t have that many followers and I’m not like a popular blog or anything lol. But yeah this took me a while to write and it was pretty fun to do. 

I dunno if any of the people I’m about to tag have done this or not yet but I’m too lazy to scroll through all their blogs and see so if I tag you and you’ve already done it cool, my bad. (Tagging some of my favorite accounts and people I consdier pals! :))

@desert-pluviophile @skammed @adamparishe @isakneven @shadeandadidas @skamwhat @ravenclawisak @bloonstuff @skamz

[almostnoisydonut]

𝓦𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓣𝓸 𝓘𝓷𝓬𝓵𝓾𝓭𝓮 𝓘𝓷 𝓐 𝓒𝓵𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓦𝓮𝓵𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓮 𝓟𝓪𝓬𝓴𝓮𝓽

We preach often (probably entirely too often) about the importance of your client experience, but it’s one of the key defining factors between a client having a good time with you, referring you to others, and leaving a positive testimonial… Or not.

Mastering the art of providing an amazing experience for your clients is crucial to your reputation as a service provider. We know this sounds super scary, but it can actually be pretty easy. As long as you’re able to check in often, respond quickly, and provide important information, you’re already at an advantage.

One way of stepping off on the right foot with a new client is by sending a welcome packet. You may have also heard it called a welcome guide, onboarding guide, or onboarding packet. We’re here to share must-have details you should include in your client welcome packet!

Welcome packets are used to show your client around, so that they know what to expect. They give your client a deep dive into your process, how the project will go, and more important details so that there will (hopefully) be no questions left unanswered. When you set expectations early on, it shows how serious you are about your craft and their wellbeing. There are pages that we’d highly recommend to include in your packet:

Right off the bat, I recommend showing your new client some appreciation with a warm welcome message and introduction.

After all the work they did in researching different service-providers, looking over your service package contract details, and actually shelling out money for a downpayment, this is the least you could do.

Also remember that buyer’s remorse is real and it’s normal for people to feel a bit uneasy after purchasing something online especially if it costs hundreds or thousands of dollars.

From the beginning, it’s a good idea to ease your new client’s fears and doubts by reassuring them they’ve made the right choice in hiring you.

Set a professional but friendly tone and you’re on your way to a fruitful and mutually beneficial relationship.

Share a few qualities your new client can expect from you such as professionalism, timeliness, and authenticity as a promise that your client is in good hands.

Next up, be sure to provide an overview of the service package they paid for so it's clear what's included (and not included).

One of the biggest frustrations I hear from service-providers is when clients want more that what was originally agreed upon.

“Can I get one more revision, please?”

“I thought I coaching and consulting are the same thing!?”

“Can you throw in a complimentary coaching call?”

Providing additional services for free, for some people, may not be a big deal but if you’re trying to meet deadlines or juggle multiple clients at once, this is not something you should take lightly.

Don’t forget that you’re running a business, not a hobby, and since you’re offering a service, clients should rightfully pay you for that service.

To protect both you and your client, any additional work or deliverables should be accounted for in writing and with compensation.

Be sure to review your welcome packet and your contract so that they are both saying the same things. The last thing you want is it to have a dispute over what’s really included in your service package because different features or benefits are stated in your communication materials.

Including your contact information and available working hours is a handy reference for your clients.

It will also help you to set boundaries and expectations around when you are available.

You can also include details around your policies and processes, so clients will know what to expect.

For example, how long you will take to respond to emails. The communication methods clients can use to contact you. And who to contact if you’re not available.

How quickly can they expect to hear from you? Do you prioritize coaching client communication over every other email? What is the best way to communicate with you? Be smart about this decision. Don’t just choose what’s easiest for the client, but consider what will help you keep the most boundaried relationship over the course of your project. When in doubt, start with email.

Establishing office hours – and sticking to them! – is essential in showing your clients you walk your talk. Include your weekly office hours, as well as any travel or out of office dates that fall during their project date.

Can they set up auto-pay? Will every invoice bill on a certain day of the month? Where can they go to pay?

List out the deliverables that you’ll be providing to the client during/after the project. This page will really help you look good, and the client will know what to specifically expect from you in regards to deliverables. It’s a total win-win!

It’s common for clients to have questions when you first start working together, so adding an FAQ’s page to your welcome packet may help you to save time.

Rather than spending time answering the same questions repeatedly, your FAQ’s list will streamline your onboarding process and give your clients the answers they are searching for sooner.

Lastly, I also recommend adding any relevant terms and conditions to your welcome packet.

You don’t need to add the full list of all your service terms and conditions as this is covered in your client agreement.

But rather a few selected terms which you think would be useful to reinforce or highlight to your clients.

So now we understand what to include in your new client welcome packet, how do we put one together?

Depending on your skill level, you could put one together using software to create your welcome packet.

However, putting your welcome packet together could take some time if you’re starting from scratch. So if you’d like to save that time, but still want to customise a template to suit your business, you can do so with a template.

[geekade]

Zwia Reviews: Justice League aka At Least it's Better than Batman V Superman

Right up front, here are some things I want to make clear for this review.

Justice League is not a good movie by any stretch of the imagination.

I personally LOVED it, and will be spending much of this review explaining why it was bad but also why I can’t wait to see it again.

To get into A LOT of what I liked about it, there is at least one big (and super obvious) spoiler, so I will have a section dedicated to those thoughts at the end of the the review. 

Anyway, THE REVIEW!

Let's talk about all the bad parts. First of all, the dialogue is cheesy. It’s just... it’s bad. It also doesn’t help that the plot is basically the plot from The Avengers. Now, I get it. Building a superhero team-up movie isn’t the easiest thing, and you’re naturally going to have some similarities between Justice League and The Avengers… but it’s too similar, right down to the magical Earth-destroying boxes they have to find. At least with Marvel, the characters are fleshed out in their own movies, so The Avengers feels way more like a celebration after taking all the time it took to get there. Justice League, on the other hand, is largely rushed and forgettable. Going their own non-Marvel way, the DCEU went ahead and put all these multi-faceted, interesting characters together without delving into most of them with their own movies. That decision didn’t do Justice League any favors. The backstory to each of the new characters is instead established through off-topic jokes. They try their best to connect with the audience by being almost comically over-the-top in their “personalities,” and the first half hour of the movie with Batman and Wonder Woman trying to get the team together is just the choppiest piece of editing I’ve seen in theaters since Suicide Squad. Literally the minute you get almost kinda connected to one of the recruitment stories, it just jumps without warning, to a whole other character. If there was ANY movie in the DCEU that should have been more than two hours, it’s this one. Instead, they squeezed as much as they could in every scene EVER, and the movie is worse off for it.

There were a lot decisions made in this movie that you could probably gather were a direct result from the outcry of people upset about Batman V Superman. Justice League is shorter than BVS. The writing has a different tone, and there's cheesy comedy strewn about. The big change that stood out to me, though? The visuals. This movie has color. The reds are red. The blues are blue. The grass is… radioactive looking? This is a movie that was very clearly designed in pre production to still be all dark and gritty looking, but was lightened up afterwards. As such, some of the colors looks VERY off. This decision to lighten things up is also probably why the special effects look RIDICULOUSLY bad. Like, bad for a cheap indie film-level bad. That is HORRIBLE for how much money went into this.

As you can see in everything from pre production to post production, there are huge amounts of glaring issues all over this movie. Even the acting, which I praised in Batman V Superman, isn’t quite up to par here. Affleck, who I still think is an incredible Batman, just seems a little off at times. Gal Gadot, I’m starting to think, isn’t really a great actress but simply has a lot of interesting weight to her words because of her accent. (You know, kinda like how British people still sound super smart all the time even if they are saying something dumb.) And then the rest of the League, well, are just comically over-the-top in their “personalities.” But the characters are actually where we get into why I love this movie. These characters ARE the Justice League. Maybe its because the characterization for DC has been so poor in the past that I just have low expectations, but when I sat in the theater I was giddy because THIS IS THE JUSTICE LEAGUE. THESE ARE COMIC BOOK CHARACTERS TO A T! This is a Batman who isn’t killing people left and right, who goes out of his way to be self-sacrificing and smart, rather than the toughest guy in the room. I especially adore how many times he realizes he can’t fight and just runs to some Bat-Vehicle. This is a Wonder Woman that... okay she was perfect in her own movie too. I don’t really have to sing the praises of Gadot’s Wonder Woman. She’s noble and fierce and one of the big guns, as she should be. This Aquaman? I mean, he’s not accurate to the comics at all, but damn he’s a comic book character if I ever saw one. Plus, Aquaman does occasionally have a pretty stubborn streak, so I’ll take it. This Cyborg? Sure, maybe he’s the super loner of the group, but this is early Cyborg. I can accept him having some struggles and learning to get comfortable in his… skin. Cyborg has always had those underlying difficulties, and it was great when Cyborg didn’t think about his differences and had times to shine.

Then we have this Flash. Okay, this is NOT Barry Allen, AT ALL. Barry Allen is nice to a fault, and boring as hell because of it. He’s the type of guy who would wear bow ties to work every day at a place that allows jeans. This is NOT Barry Allen. But God help me, he’s a speedster through and through. Ezra’s performance is much more in line with some other fan favorites like Wally West or Bart Allen. You know, the playful, sometimes distracted, but well meaning Flashes. I think he’s the farthest thing there is to Barry Allen, but Barry is kinda lame so I am totally okay with the movie adopting some of the other Speedsters' qualities here.

And honestly, at the end of the day, this is why I liked the movie. The characters. This movie felt like a longer episode of the Justice League cartoon. It was largely forgettable, not deep or complex, but the characters were all themselves and it was a lot of fun to watch. Sometimes that's all you need. By no means am I going to tell you to go watch it. It’s a pointless movie. But if you love DC and their characters as much as I do, you might enjoy it. Finally, the biggest reason I enjoyed it is in the Spoilers section. Read it at your own risk. Its a huge spoiler, but its nothing that you won’t see coming. SPOILERS BELOW

FUCKING SUPERMAN. Okay, so Superman historically is a character that I usually write off as boring. To me, if Superman is your favorite character in DC, I always figured you either didn’t know enough about the character, or were a fool. Lately, much like my similar growing love for Captain America, I’ve learned to appreciate this big blue boy scout and I think I can, in an odd, sick way, thank Batman V Superman for that. See, Superman IS a symbol for hope in comics. When Superman shows up to help in other character’s stories, there's usually a feeling that things will be okay. It’s why Superman going evil is such a big thing for DC to do, since it really shatters those hopeful expectations of the character. He is someone who, when he isn’t around or when he’s fallen from grace, it's a rough experience for everyone. And when he is there, you know that no matter how tough, he’ll always take time for the little guy and be as supportive and kind as he can.

This movie franchise has not had that Superman. This Superman is an angsty, whiny, brooding boy, who abuses his power and portrays himself as a God more than a friend. I’ve enjoyed these movies, but I have hated how Superman was portrayed because it disrespected everything I expect from Superman. Superman is someone who would always find a way and always be able to lighten the mood. Well, then Superman died. And then he came back. And suddenly, after he got done fighting the Justice League, he got himself together and finally became the Superman I’ve been waiting for. (Also real quick, Superman and Flash during that fight? THAT WAS THE COOLEST THING) Superman spent the entire finale helping the other heroes. He would be the big gun when he needed to be, but he also would just be moral support, or assist Cyborg, or assure Cyborg that everything would be okay, or assist Flash with saving people and giving him work he knew was in his ability. Superman was just a kind, fun guy the entire fight, who never showed an ounce of doubt in his trust that everything would be okay. That fight had stakes, but you didn’t feel them BECAUSE Superman let you know everything would be okay. (Also because of the entire town of people that were in danger we only saw one tiny family… so… yeah) I just really loved Superman in this movie and I NEVER thought I would say that.

Also that end credits scene where Superman and Flash race for fun??? LIKE COME ON!!! HOW COULD YOU NOT LOVE THAT???? I honestly still think we should expect better from DC, because seriously… these characters can do SO MUCH BETTER. But this is a small victory in the right direction, and I’m going to enjoy the hell out of it.

[aion-rsa]

INTERVIEW: McDuffie Award Winner Talks His Experimental Sci-Fi Comic

Since 2015, the The Dwayne McDuffie Award for Diversity has been awarded each year at Long Beach Comic Expo, celebrating the work of new comics which not only tell an interesting story with a diverse cast that represents voices who aren’t heard often enough in the industry — but which are changing the way people view comics as a whole.

Winning the award has become a signifier of work which is notable, fresh and contemporary, experimenting with comics as a form and bringing something new and thoroughly entertaining to comics fans. This year’s winner, Ezra Claytan Daniels’ “Upgrade Soul,” is certainly an example of that.

Originally released as a digital app in collaboration with Erik Loyer, the comic transitions the pages in a fashion unique for the digital format, and features a soundtrack from musician Alexis Gideon which flows through the pages as the reader moves through the story. It’s not just an incredibly well-told and smart piece of comics narrative, it’s one which explores what a comics narrative can be. Following Daniels’ win at this year’s ceremony, CBR spoke to the cartoonist about the project, how it came together and what it was like to win this year’s coveted trophy.

CBR: What’s your background as a writer and artist? How did you first get into making comics?

Ezra Claytan Daniels: I’ve been drawing comics since I was a little kid. I had a really terrible yet deadly serious comic strip about a troupe of circus performers fighting a manipulative alien in my high school paper. But my professional background is in graphic design and commercial illustration, with detours into forensic illustration and user interface design (I designed the UI for the mobile app, iAnnotate PDF). I started making autobio zines a few years after high school, largely as an excruciatingly juvenile attempt to meet women. Seriously, those old comics are the worst thing ever.

You’ve published several comics over the last decade or so, including “The Changers” and “A Circuit Closed”, but when did you first start work on “Upgrade Soul”? What made you want to tell this story?

I first started thinking about the ideas behind “Upgrade Soul” in my early 20s, before I did “The Changers.” I wanted to write a horror story, so I thought, “What’s the scariest thing I can imagine?” At the time, it was obsolescence. Being faced with someone who’s better at being me than I am. I was actually more into “Upgrade Soul” as a concept, but I knew I wasn’t a good enough writer yet to do something that ambitious. So I did “The Changers” first, sort of as a practice graphic novel. “The Changers” was ambitious, too, but it’s really low-key and straight-forward. It’s essentially an escape fantasy about myself and my roommate being super-beings from the future. I learned so much about making comics by self publishing that book, though, from publicity to working with distributors, to touring. I had a blast. After the dust settled, I sat down to really try to figure out Upgrade Soul. That was about 12 or 13 years ago. I’d been working on it off and on until I finally finished this past December.

Who are Hank and Molly, the two leads of the series? What kind of people are they, and where do we find them as the comic begins?

The two main characters, Hank and Molly, are based on my grandparents, Leon and Barb. They were like second parents to me growing up, and we were super close. I wanted the main characters to be people you don’t see in comics very often. I wanted to try to put myself in the shoes of people I knew very well, but who were very different from me. I wanted to make a book that didn’t feel familiar. Something I personally would’ve been really excited to see on a comic shelf as a reader. The story introduces Hank and Molly as wealthy investors in an experimental cellular rejuvenation procedure. Their only stipulation for support of the project is that they be the first to undergo the procedure.

The drama begins when a the procedure fails and Hank and Molly are faced with clones of themselves who are severely disfigured, but intellectually and physically far superior. The story is thematically about which counterpart better represents the identity of the individual; the one that looks and sounds like the person, or the one that’s, by every non-aesthetic metric, a perfect idealization of that person.

Your art style seems to primarily draw from both European and Japanese influences — is it fair to say those were the comics you grew up reading and loving?

I liked comics fine as a kid and teen, but I was way more into animation. And you called it, the films I loved the most were definitely Japanese and European. “Fantastic Planet,” “Akira,” “Lensman,” “Venus Wars,” “Fire & Ice” — these were on constant rotation.

I think there’s a very animation-y feel to my art — it’s very flat and clean, like animation cells. But after I dropped out of art school, I fell into trial graphics, doing medical and technical illustrations and infographics for court cases. That industry is all about clarity of information, with no room for embellishments. I definitely read “How to Draw Comics the Marvel Way” when I first started getting serious about comics, but I vehemently disagreed with a lot of it, particularly the part about using dynamic angles to heighten drama. I hated in comics when you couldn’t keep track of where characters were standing in a room because every panel was drawn from a different angle on the floor or ceiling. I think this aversion came from my time doing crime scene diagrams.

I never want my reader to be distracted from the narrative because I drew something weirdly. I sometimes describe my style as looking like an aircraft safety card.

You’ve released the story as an app in collaboration with Erik Loyer. Was it difficult to make that leap to digital, after first planning and developing “Upgrade Soul” in a more traditional format?

I’d been working on “Upgrade Soul” for a few years, pitching it around every once in a while but not really getting any traction. I’d done some work with Erik on smaller interactive comics projects, like his Reuben and Lullaby app, and an interactive essay he designed for academic Caren Kaplan, called “Precision Targets.” He started to develop an interactive comics platform for iOS and asked if I wanted to do something for it. I was deep into “Upgrade Soul” by then, and it hadn’t found a home, so I said “sure”!

I hadn’t done enough work on it by that point for it to be a huge hassle to imagine it for the digital platform, but it definitely still has roots in the print format. It was a seamless transition to the print version I’m shopping now. I’m definitely historically interested in technology and gaming, but I hadn’t given any real thought to digital comics before Erik approached me. Although, now that I think about it, I did put out the last issue of my crappy auto-bio comic a few years prior as a CD-ROM, so maybe I’m not giving myself enough credit! The “Upgrade Soul” app is on hiatus, though. It’s only the first half of the story.

Hopefully, after I find a publisher, we can work out a way to come back to it because I’m totally in love with it. It’s just not on the road map right now.

At what point did the audio aspect of “Upgrade Soul” first come into place? How did musician Alexis Gideon come on board the project, and what did that decision bring to the story overall?

Once Erik and I decided to work together, we just started having all these really heady conversations about the definition of comics and what to do and what not to do with the technology at our disposal. Our conversations eventually evolved into a manifesto that became the centerpiece of a digital comics portal I designed with Amsterdam-based Submarine Channel, ScreenDiver.com. A huge part of our digital comics philosophy was to never take temporal control from the reader. This meant that literal sound effects, which would have the effect of representing a passage of time, were out. But music, designed to create and maintain an atmosphere, was fair game.

In “Upgrade Soul,” the music follows your progress through the story, so every panel triggers a specific musical cue. You play the music almost the same way you read the comic, at your own pace. I’d done some design and animation work with Alexis, and we worked really well together. I’m just such a huge fan of his music; his singular brand of classically-trained experimental weirdo hip-hop was the perfect fit for “Upgrade Soul.”

When did you find out you’d been nominated for the Dwayne McDuffie Award?

I follow the Dwayne McDuffie Foundation on social media, and they posted a call for submissions a few weeks before I finished “Upgrade Soul.” The timing was perfect. I didn’t think I had any chance in hell of winning, but it’s just really helpful to have hard goals like that to finish something, especially since I was really losing steam toward the end. I guess it was a month or so later that I got an email from them letting me know I was among 5 finalists. I was incredibly honored, but even then, I didn’t think I had any chance of winning. I’ve never won anything in my life. And I was up against Dave Walker, who’d been having like the best year ever.

I didn’t find out I’d won until everybody else did, at the ceremony at Long Beach Comics Expo. It was so funny and awesome and weird. I happened to be the only nominee who was able to attend, since I live in LA, so they asked me to give a little talk before the winner was announced about what Dwayne McDuffie meant to me. I was so worried about how awkward it was going to be when I didn’t win! But little did I know that all the judges and Dwayne McDuffie folks already knew.

The ceremony was MC’d by Phil Lamarr, and it was such a surreal honor to get to hang out with the voice of Static Shock. Everybody involved in the foundation, and the judges, were so amazing and sweet and supportive. Charlotte, Dwayne’s widow, was just incredibly inspiring. It was most definitely the highlight of my career thus far.

Was Dwayne McDuffie a creator you were aware of, prior to your nomination?

My brother and I were constantly looking for heroes that looked like our dad, who was Black. We latched onto every Black character in the action movies we loved. The white neighborhood kids would fight to be Arnold when we played “Predator,” but we’d always be Bill Duke and Carl Weathers. We collected every black “G.I. Joe” and “Star Trek: The Next Generation” figure. But those characters were always sidekicks or bit players. So when the “Static Shock” cartoon came out, we were just transfixed. It was pure magic. I didn’t learn until years later how important Dwayne McDuffie was to so many other kids of color, and how monumental his legacy was.

It’s an award specifically noting works which offer representation within the pages — was that something you had at heart when you were making the comic, that idea of representing people whose stories don’t usually get told, and digging into their personalities and culture?

Absolutely. As a mixed race person (my mom is white), it’s an inextricable part of my being. “Upgrade Soul” gets into the ways in which our experience of life, or how we are treated by the world, forms our identity. It looks at the ways racial discrimination is both similar and distinct from age, sex and ability discrimination. These are the kinds of ideas that interest and challenge me as both a writer and a reader.

What’s next for you, following the conclusion of “Upgrade Soul” and as it now looks for a publisher? Do you have any other projects coming up?

Fingers crossed “Upgrade Soul” finds a good home, but it’ll come out this year one way or another. I also recently finished a short film collaboration with Adebukola Bodunrin that just started it’s festival life. It just screened at the International Film Festival Rotterdam and the Whitney in New York, and is screening at the Boston Underground Film Fest in March. It’s an experimental sci-fi animation that reimagines the Yoruba creation myth in a space station built around a simulation of the Big Bang. It’s called The Golden Chain.

I also have a new graphic novel on the home stretch with the incredible Ben Passmore, tentatively called “BTTMFDRS.” I’m writing it and he’s drawing it. It’s a horror comedy about gentrification and cultural appropriation and I’m so excited for people to see it! We should wrap that up by this summer so look for that this year, too!

To find out more about “Upgrade Soul” and Ezra Claytan Daniels’ work, check out his website and his Ttwitter account here.

The post INTERVIEW: McDuffie Award Winner Talks His Experimental Sci-Fi Comic appeared first on CBR.

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