#aaron hotch x fe!reader
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First Kick
Summary: Aaron Hotchner x Fe!Reader -> Both you and Aaron have been in a secret relationship for three years, except when you go into labour, the rest of the team can't help but speculate.
Disclaimer: Just pure fluff. Small descriptions of labour. BAU being a family. Jack and Haley don't exist in this fic. Not Proof Read.
You would have thought working with a bunch of FBI profilers, they would have figured out the truth by now.
But they hadn’t.
Instead, both yourself and Aaron had lived in wedded bliss for the last three years and were now expecting your first child.
Of course, that couldn’t be hidden from the team. The constant morning sickness. The aversions to certain smells. The swollen ankles, the overwhelming emotions and the growing belly.
Which, as you were sitting at the dim light of your desk filling in the last of the paperwork for your latest case, began to move.
The others had stepped out for a while, grabbing some food. They had invited you except the thought of walking a block and a half already made you want to fall asleep. So, kissing the top of your head, Morgan took your order and promised to bring you back extra guac.
The hum from the headphones you placed around your belly filled the small silence, a tune of Motzart rather than a constant drum of a nearby printer.
However, from under the headphones, you felt a movement.
It wasn’t big. Barely noticeable. But it was there.
Or was it?
Maybe it was nothing.
Except, twenty seconds later, you knew for certain.
Pulling the headphones from you, you stood up immediately and rushed towards Hotch’s office.
And you continued with your normal routine. Knocking on his door, calling his name and stepping inside.
“Is everything okay?”
Trying not to raise any alarm, you closed his office door behind you before shutting the blinds.
“Is everything okay?”
Aaron scanned your face. “Honey?”
Within seconds he was by your side. “What is it?”
But then you smiled. And he became confused.
“What-”
“Feel.”
Taking his hand, you guided it to cover part of your growing belly. “What am I-”
Kick.
You watched every emotion possible pass over Aaron’s face as he took in the feeling of your child kicking his palm.
“Is that-”
Kick.
Then he laughed.
Aaron Hotchner laughed.
It wasn’t often that you got to see this side of your husband when at work. So it was a nice surprise when you did.
Within seconds, he had stepped a little closer and had carefully removed his hand from the top of your stomach and slipped it under the hem of your shirt, allowing his warm palm to rest against your skin.
Then your baby kicked harder.
You both laughed that time.
“Hey, ow.” You said, looking at your stomach.
Aaron chuckled lightly before resting his forehead against yours as his other hand rested against your face, brushing the fallen hair from your face and cupping your cheek.
“She’s moving.”
You smiled. “You’re still convinced it’s a girl?”
“Of course I am. I’m a profiler. I should know.”
You chuckled lightly, shaking your head. “I’m a profiler, too, you know.”
“I know.”
“And it’s mother.”
“And you disagree?” He asked, still with a light smile gracing his lips.
You hummed. “I’m uncertain.”
“Well, how about I give you my profile and see how you feel?”
You laughed. “It really is second nature to you.”
Aaron hummed before moving his hand, still under your shirt, to the top of your belly.
“You’re carrying high, for one.” His thumb traced back and forth on your stomach. “You’ve suffered with morning sickness before twelve weeks, your main craving so far has been fruit. You sleep on your right side.”
“I always sleep on my right side.”
Aaron smiled. “And your skin,” He stroked his thumb against your cheekbone. “It’s soft.”
You smiled, leaning into his touch. “Except, they are just old wives tales.”
“I’d like to think there is still some justice in them. Are you sure you want to wait until they’re born?”
“Yes.”
“And you couldn’t be persuaded?”
“Nope.”
“Are you sure?” Aaron smirked a little before leaning in and kissing you.
Pulling his hand from your stomach, he brought it up to the other side of your face and it wasn’t long before he felt your body melt into his.
“The others are going to be back soon.”
Aaron groaned a little but not before kissing you a last few times before pulling away.
“You’d think they would have figured it out by now.”
You nodded. “But it is kinda fun. And I can’t wait until they see our baby. I have a feeling they’ll look like you.”
“I should hope so.”
You laughed. “You know what I mean. And, if it is a girl, don’t they usually look like they’re dad?”
“Are you saying you agree with my profile?”
You hummed. “Maybe. Just a little. You are the Unit Chief of the BAU, so I suppose you have some credibility.”
“Even if they’re just old wives tales?” He asked, raising his eyebrow a little.
You nodded, with a slight smile. “Even if they’re just old wives tales.”
You finally left his office just before the team got back, but not before stealing a few more kisses.
Over the following months, the team grew more protective of you. With your pregnancy coming to an end, and still not knowing who the father was, they began to step up.
It was sweet to watch.
Penelope had planned your baby shower with JJ’s help. Reid had read up on everything a doctor and midwife knew about giving birth, just in case you went into early labour. Emily had helped you pack your spare hospital bag for the office in case you were rushed into labour whilst at the office or away on a case, being too far from home to drive to get your hospital bag.
And when Hotch couldn’t be by your side, he made sure either Rossi and Morgan were there to help you.
“You okay there, Momma?”
You looked to Morgan who had appeared from around the corner. You were leaning against the counter, your hand holding onto the bottom of your belly.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine.” You breathed out. “Just a little- ow. Okay. Hey-”
“Whoa, hey, okay, take it easy.”
Morgan placed his coffee mug down, coming right back to your side and holding your hand. “What do you need?”
Your grip tightened around his hand. “Ow. Hospital.”
“Okay, okay. Where’s your hospital bag?”
“By my desk. Emily-” You grunted in pain. “Emily knows.”
“Okay, okay. It’s okay. Emily!”
Turning around, it took Emily less than ten seconds to realise what was going on.
“Okay, Garcia. Hey! Penelope, call Hotch. Let him know what’s going on.”
“Why, what’s-O…oh my god. Okay, Okay. Calling him now.”
By the time Morgan got you to the parking lot, Hotch was pulling in.
“Get in, I can drive her straight there.”
“Have you got everything you need?”
You nodded.
“Call us if you need anything?” Emily asked, shutting your door.
You could only hum, holding onto Emily’s hand.
She leaned in for a moment, kissing your cheek.
“See you when you get back, Momma.”
Hotch pulled away a few moments later, rushing you directly to the hospital.
And for the next twenty hours, Hotch stayed by your side. And the rest of the team started to think.
“I mean, think about it. When she got braxton hicks. Who was the first one at her side?”
“Hotch.” Penelope answered.
“Yeah, and the way he looked. I don’t know about you but I have never seen Hotch that nervous.”
“That is true.” Rossi agreed.
“But they can’t be���together, can they?” JJ asked. “You all had it sussed about me and Will. They couldn’t go this long and not have us at least find out.”
“Maybe they didn’t want us to.”
“Or maybe they’re not together at all.”
“When have you ever known either of them to be that close with each other as they are with us? Rossi, have you ever seen the inside of Hotch’s house?”
“Not for a while, no. Why, have you ever seen hers?”
Emily shook her head.
“Penelope, can you find out anything?” Morgan asked, turning to his best girl.
“I can but it would completely wreck my moral standing.”
“You’ve never run a background check on us?” JJ asked.
“No! That would be an invasion of your privacy. And theirs! If they are a..them, I suppose. Or maybe not. Maybe she is just a single mother and Hotch has decided to help her. He was the first to find out.”
“See, another thing!” Emily pointed out.
“But Hotch is the first to know everything about us. He’s the main person we have to tell when it comes to personal things that could affect our work.” Morgan explained.
“But why not come to one of us?” Rossi asked. “JJ, what do you think? Out of us, who would you have come to?”
JJ thought for a moment. “Out of you boys? Probably…Hotch.”
“Really?” Rossi asked.
“Why not me?” Morgan asked.
“Or me?” Reid finished.
JJ smiled. “You know I love you all equally, but out of Three Divorces, Pretty Boy and Chocolate Thunder, I’d want to tell someone I know to be calm. That could remain level headed.”
“And we’re not level headed?” Morgan asked, causing JJ to look up above her shoulder.
“What did you do when I told you I was pregnant?”
Morgan paused for a second. “You may have a point.”
“Either way, we can’t know for certain that they’re having a baby together.” Reid pointed out.
“Well, she’s married. Or engaged, at least.”
They all turned to Emily.
“How do you know that?”
“Her wedding finger. Last time she came back from AL she had a tan line. It was faint, but it was there.”
“Maybe he ran off? They got pregnant but he didn’t want to be in the picture?”
Penelope scoffed. “What a jerk.”
“I don’t think they’d appreciate us speculating like this.”
“JJ’s right. Maybe they’re just friends and Hotch is helping her out. Garcia, have you heard from them yet?”
“Not yet, Sir.”
Meanwhile, at the hospital, the midwife was instructing Aaron to get behind you, holding you up and holding your hands and you continued to push.
“I don’t think I can do it.”
“Yes, you can. Yes, you can. Come on, honey. I know you can.”
“Can’t you do it for me?”
Aaron chuckled. “I wish I could, but I can’t.”
“Just a couple more pushes, Mrs Hotchner.”
Another wave of contractions hit and you continued to push for another fifteen minutes before finally everyone in the room heard the cries of your baby.
“You did it, honey. I’m so proud of you. You did it.”
“Is she okay? What-Where is she?”
Aaron smiled, tears in his eyes, pushing the hair out of your own. “She’s-She’s okay. Look, the midwife is just wrapping them up.”
A few moments later, the midwife handed you your baby.
Two days later they discharged you from the hospital and the first stop made was at the office considering the last of your things had been left there when you went into labour.
And it also meant the team could finally greet your baby.
“Ooh, ooh, they’re here. They’re here.”
Penelope was the first to spot you and Hotch standing in his office and it wasn’t long before they were all standing outside.
However, as the congratulations and praise was made, Penelope’s voice dropped an octave after she got a clear look of the baby.
“Oh my god.”
“What is it, Garcia?”
“Ohh, ohh, ohh my goodness.”
But you could only smile.
“You!” Penelope pointed before turning to look at Hotch. “And you! Oh my god! You are!”
You looked behind you, finding your husband standing closer to you than when the team had first walked inside.
“Are what? Baby girl, what’s-”
And then it clicked.
With all of them.
And for a moment they were all stunned into complete silence.
“Aaron…why didn’t you…”
“Tell you?” Hotch asked, finishing Rossi’s question.
“Truthfully, we kinda maybe wanted to see how long it would take you all to figure out.” You explained.
“But…how?!” JJ asked.
You just shrugged.
“Hints were there if you looked for them.” Aaron said.
“Hints were- Oh, so, now he tells us. How long?”
“Four years.” You both answered.
“Four years?!” They all half shouted, quickly remembering there was an infant present.
“Wait.” Penelope said, holding up her hands. “Oh my god, it’s all coming together. This must be how Sherlock Holmes feels when he cracks a case.”
Both yourself and Aaron smiled before looking down at the sleeping baby in your arms.
“The weekends away, the lunch orders, the arrive at work together. Oh my god! The touching.” Penelope hit Emily and Derek’s arm.
“Ow!” They both called.
“How could you two not have noticed this?!”
“You didn’t notice either!” Emily replied, rubbing her arm.
“Baby girl, they kept this from us for four years. Why aren’t you hitting them?”
“Because,” Penelope explained. “She had just had a beautiful baby girl. And Hotch is my boss.”
“Can you ever find a way to forgive us?”
They all looked at each other before seemingly coming to the same conclusion. “Fine. But, only if you tell us how it happened and when. And, if you have a wedding re-do so that we all get to attend.”
Both you and Aaron looked at each other.
“That could work.”
“Great! Now, let me see this beautiful baby girl.” Penelope said, her voice once again chipper, as she came to your side.
“My goodness, she’s beautiful. Hotch, she looks just like you.”
Aaron smiled at the compliment, but shook his head. “No, that’s all her mom.”
“Oh-ho,” Rossi laughed a little. “She is going to be running rings around us all soon enough.”
Four weeks later, each member of the team turned up together on different days, listening to the story of your relationship. First were the girls and Reid before JJ showed up with Morgan and Rossi. JJ was there to drop some items off that both yourself and Hotch would find useful with the nursery but she didn’t mind hearing the story a second time.
Eight weeks after you had given birth, your doorbell rang and just as Aaron opened up the front door, Penelope and Rossi walked inside carrying boxes of items before directing the rest of the team through your home into the garden.
“Dave, what’s going on?”
“You, my dear friend, are getting married.”
“We’re already married.” You said with a small laugh, walking to stand beside your husband.
Dave nodded. “That you are, but today, you are both getting remarried. You did promise us.”
“We did promise them.” Aaron said, turning to look at you.
“We did, didn’t we?”
Dave smiled. “So, Uncle Reid is going to be looking after this little one.”
You carefully handed your baby girl to Spencer as Dave continued to explain.
“Whilst the girls help you get ready and I enlist your help,” Rossi turned to look at Hotch. “To help finish the set up.”
Penelope appeared from down the hallway. “Come on, Emily is finishing setting everything up.”
“I guess I’ll see you at the wedding?”
“I’ll be the one in white.”
Aaron smiled before kissing you quickly as barely a second later Penelope was dragging you upstairs.
That night was filled with joy, laughter and happiness. Yourself and Aaron shared another set of marriage vows in front of the team. You shared a second first dance, a second first kiss and a first family dance.
It was a quiet moment on the corner of the dance floor. You were swaying with your baby, softly, in your arms when you felt a familiar pair of arms wrap around your waist from behind and a familiar pair of lips kiss your shoulder.
Turning around you, Aaron held both of you close. Your forehead against his and your eyes closed, his fingers traced patterns against your arms back and forth before down your side and to your hips where he pulled you in a little closer.
Neither of you knew it until a week later, but Morgan had, with Emily’s help, caught everything on camera. And with help from Penelope, a second wedding video had been made.
Capturing the full length of your first family dance together.
#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x fe!reader#hotch x reader#hotch x fe!reader#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch x fe!reader#criminal minds#emily prentiss#jennifer jareau#spencer reid#derek morgan#penelope garcia#david rossi#aaron hotchner#bau#criminal minds x reader#bau agent reader#bau agent#mostly fluff#dad hotch#hidden relationship#cute family moments#weddings#pregnancy
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ruined surprises | ·˚ ༘ aaron hotchner ,,
summary - you accidentally find a small, red, velvet box in aaron’s drawers.
genre - fluff, nonbau!reader x aaron, proposals, engagement rings, happy ending
warnings - mentions of anxiety, mixed feelings, um… being proposed to???
w.c. - idk why i put this here i never check before uploading. it’s only like 1k you’ll be okay.
a/n - hey pia why don’t we edit those drafts for the requests- no. ima do my own thing 😏🕷️also pls tell me abt mistakes i did not proof read this lol!
You sat at your dining table staring into space, or more specifically the bare wood in front of you. There were mixed emotions coursing through your veins. You felt as if your blood was changing from pink to green in the ugly mesh of conflicting feelings.
While this revelation brought you happiness and immense excitement, it also brought you fear. You were not supposed to find this, at least not now.
It stood prominent in your pocket, a pandora’s box of possibilities on how Aaron would react to your discovery. Would he be scared? Angry? Sad?
Your fingers picked at your nails as you took steadying breaths. The clock read only 5 minutes before Aaron returns from his vigorous job, 5 minutes before you’d have to reluctantly tell him you found the one thing he had been hiding from you.
The front door opens to your apartment and your palms start sweating in insecurity.
He’s tired, he’s worked all day, maybe it’s not the best time to bring it up. But what if he found out you knew the whole time? You’d be lying to him, and he values honesty above all else. What if it’s not for you? A gift, or maybe even an heirloom? Everything in your head started to doubt the one thing you wanted it to mean.
“Honey?”
Aaron stood at the end of the table, eyebrows low and eyes squinted slightly in concern. Coming home to your favourite person disassociating rigidly wasn’t a very warm welcome home. He would usually be greeted by a kiss, or the smell of a meal, or a bear hug. This was off, this was different.
“Aaron.” You smile, genuinely. Even with your anxiety raising your heartbeat by the second, there’s nothing that can keep you smiling from the sight of your handsome lover. Though the feeling was not long lived.
“Are you okay?” He asks, placing his bag down on the table and loosening his tie slightly.
“I’m… We need to talk.” You say with a gulp. You lowered your head and glanced at his expression quickly. It came out more serious than it needed to be, and honestly Aaron started thinking the worse.
He sat on the chair next to you and searched your avoiding eyes, “Y/n-“
“Before you say anything, and before I tell you about what,” you waved your hands slightly, “we’re actually talking about. I need you to know that if I’m wrong you can’t laugh at me, and you can’t get angry. Okay?”
He nodded more confused than ever. Okay so, the fact that he could possibly laugh from this ‘talk’ was a sign it wasn’t anything too bad. He only wished you’d stop taking deep breaths and get too it.
You sighed, tired of your own stalling before reaching in your back pocket and putting a small, deep red velvet box on the table. Aaron’s dark eyes latched onto the box and he sighed, bringing a hand up to mess with his hair in shock.
“Do you know what’s in there?” Maybe you hadn’t-
You nodded. He nodded back and closed his mouth in a tight lipped grimace. This was not how he planned his proposal to go.
You took a deep breath and quickly defended yourself, “I lost my sports bra, and I thought maybe I put it in your drawers accidentally so I opened them and found… that.”
Aaron looked into your eyes, you looked scared but as he watched your eyes soften he knew that you weren’t scared of the implications, you were scared you had done the wrong thing.
“Thank you for not pretending to be oblivious.” He said smoothly, receiving a small smile in return. It warmed his heart. Jesus, he thought you were breaking up with him.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have looked through your stuff. I’ve ruined the surprise, your surprise-“
“It’s okay.” He smiled, bringing his hand over yours, pulling it to his mouth and kissing your knuckles. You smile softly and he continues, “Honestly, it’s a little embarrassing.”
“How?” You tilted your head and furrowed your brows, running your thumb over the back of his hand softly.
“Now you know I want to marry you.” Aaron’s cheeks reddened only slightly, and you laughed to bask in it. It wasn’t often you got your lover blushing.
“You told me you wanted to marry me on our fourth date. Trust me, I remember.”
He laughed this time and looked down at the box. “Did you like the ring?”
“I didn’t get a good look because I shut it immediately. I pinched my finger in the clasp.” You displayed your fingertip as proof, “But from what I saw, it was perfect.”
You didn’t ruin his plans at all, he thought. It wasn’t a terrible revelation, you didn’t give it to him and run away, you didn’t let him down easy. You were honest and turned the moment into a core memory. You laughed. Everything was good when you laughed.
Aaron placed a soft hand on your cheek and placed a loving kiss on your lips, you smiled into it. “You’ll just have to wait longer now.” He whispered jokingly, to which you slapped him on the chest and whined, no fair.
No. What wasn’t fair was that he would get the best life, with the most perfect wife in the world, and others wouldn’t.
But it was hard to feel sorry for others when you were in front of him.
About a month later. Aaron Hotchner decided he couldn’t wait any longer.
Aaron’s arm was on the back rest of the couch, legs stretched on a foot rest and you cross-legged beside him explaining the deep lore behind the movie that was playing in the background. You were blabbering on, voice changing between characters that you tried to imitate, and topic lighting up your face more than the TV screen.
And Aaron’s heart just couldn’t take it. He needed to ask you to marry him more than he needed anything else in the world. Those four words seemed to be the only cure to his love sickness (though he knew it would only get worse).
You laughed at one of your own jokes, and started to calm down your explanation.
“And that’s why the first actor got replaced.” You smiled and placed your hands in your lap, face triumphant. Aaron smiled softly, eyes tracing your face with love and adoration.
“Can I ask you a question?” He asked.
You nodded, thinking it would be about the movie, “Of course.”
“Will you marry me?” He took the familiar velvet box from his sweatpant’s pocket and clicked it open, cheeks hurting in a smile as the ring was exposed to you for the second time. Aaron mentally scolded himself for not having a speech ready but seriously, he had not planned to do it tonight. It was a yearning, a need. Everything he would say to you, he promised to say a million times in your marriage as to not feel guilty about the bland proposal.
You held a hand over your mouth. Eyes glistening quickly, heartbeat seemingly still in your chest.
“Yes, oh my god. Aaron- Yes!” You threw yourself on him and squeezed his shoulders and back in a hug so tight he had to pat your back to get you off.
Not that he wanted you to stop, he just wanted to see you with a ring on your finger as quick as he could.
perm taglist (open!) - @jeffswh0re @reap3erslov3 @candyd1es @0108s22m @aurorsworld @theoraekenslover
#criminal minds#aaron hotch oneshot#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner fluff#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner x fe!reader#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotch#aaron hotch fic#aaron hotch imagine#aaron hotch fanfiction#aaron hotch x you#aaron hotchner x you#🍵 —☆ pia’s pages
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Could you do #27 with Aaron pretty please 💜💙💜
I love how this turned out. At home, domestic, dad!hotch is one of my favorites! I hope you like it.
Aaron Hotchner x GN!Reader
Prompt 27: piggy back hugs
Drabble Requests are close, just finishing up what’s in my inbox!
You watch as Aaron runs around the apartment with Jack on his back. The little boy is giggling and hanging on for dear life, as Aaron zigs one way and then zags the other, before turning in a few circles. You can see when the energy starts to go, and he stops by the couch. You get into position, and with a confidence that amazes you and thrills you at the same time, Jack lets go and falls into your arms.
You tickle him for a second before blowing a raspberry on to his belly and making him giggle some more. He returns the favor by smushing your cheeks between his little hands, turning your face, and blowing one onto your cheek. This time, you’re the one laughing. Aaron plops down behind you, and pulls the both of you into his arms.
You’re not quite sure how your boyfriend does it; managing a high stress job, being a dad, and making time for you, but he does. The cuddle session lasts a fe more seconds before Aaron declares its bed time and swoops Jack off for his nightly bed time routine. You kiss Jack goodnight and then step back to give them some father son time.
While they do that you start picking up: righting throw pillows and carrying ice cream bowls into the kitchen, where you start picking up next. You pile dirty dishes into the sink and start putting away the leftovers and condiments. You’re in the middle of wiping down the counters when Aaron comes in. He drops a kiss on the top of your head, and goes to load the dishwasher.
You stop to watch him for a second, before tossing the washcloth to the side. You go up behind him, go up on your tiptoes, and wrap your arms around his neck, giving him a hug. One of his hands briefly covers your clasped ones, before both of his hands sneak back and grab your thighs, before you know it you’re on your own piggyback ride to the bedroom.
#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x you#criminal minds#criminal minds reader insert#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds fanfiction#jack hotchner#drabbles#hug drabbles#happypanda
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Freefall
aaron hotchner x fem!reader
word count: 15.3k | warnings: smut!!!! alcohol mention, murder mention, rape mention, lots of typical cm violence!
inspired by: its called freefall by rainbow kitten surprise (i highly recommend listening to this song before or during reading!)
Anyway, you say you’re too busy saving everybody else to save yourself / And you don’t want no help, oh well / That’s the story to tell
ok i have put my blood sweat and tears in this lamfkndksjfj this has been my wip for almost 3 weeks this is my entry for @veraiconcos fic challenge!! her prompt fit so perfectly with this fic so i am so excited to share it with you guys. this is by far my most challenging piece and the one i worked the longest on. i really hope you all love it, feedback is much appreciate. i am tagging some moots to signal boost this, i hope u dont mind
Aaron-
This woman killed my dad. They said you’d be able to help. Please find her.
Aaron ran his fingertips over the letter one more time, feeling the depth of the pen, the engravement of each letter into the crisp stationary. He reread the words for a thousandth time, wondering if this time he could discover who actually sent the letter. But unfortunately, just like the past times, there was nothing to indicate who the sender was. The only other thing in the picture was a photograph of a young woman, the person Aaron believed was the murderer. Her face was mostly covered, and he was almost certain the short black bob that sat on her head was a wig. There was nothing about the photo that would help identify her, but on the back of the photo was a date- May 7th 2020, and a city, Sante Fe, NM.
He continued to stare at it, hoping some new information would pop out at him this time. But there was nothing, and he knew if he wanted to find whoever was responsible for this crime, he would need to involve the team. Whoever sent this clearly only wanted Aaron involved, even addressing him personally as Aaron and not Agent Hotchner.. Who could this person be? And who sent him Aaron’s way?
“You’re here early,” JJ hesitated, walking through the doors of the BAU to begin her day.
“Yeah… I’ve got kind of a… thing?” Aaron stammered over his words, trying to decide how he should go about this.
“What’s going on, Hotch?”
“Come take a look at this. It was on my desk yesterday.” Hotch waved JJ over to him, holding the letter tightly in hands. He handed it to her hesitantly, still not feeling comfortable sharing with the rest of the team. It could be a prank, a practical joke, somebody just trying to waste his time. But how did it find it’s way onto his desk? Who would be messing with him like this?
“Was there an envelope?” JJ asked, staring at the words on the paper.
“Yes, addressed to me, but no return address. It seems like it was hand delivered.”
“The handwriting looks like a teenagers, how would he have made it all the way from New Mexico?”
“Maybe somebody else delivered it?”
Aaron and JJ’s attention was quickly taken away when Spencer and Derek walked through the doors, their loud voices cracking through the quiet air of the BAU. They were arguing about something pointless, as they usually did. Aaron felt his head throbbing as the day started to begin, unsure of how much longer he’d be able to make it without some strong coffee.
“JJ, keep this between us for now. I’ll bring it to Garcia, see if she can find anything worth investigating. I don’t want to bring it to the team unless I’m sure we have a case.”
“Understood.” JJ smiled kindly at him, a look he was all too familiar with. Ever since Haley died, it felt like everyone was constantly walking on eggshells around him. Everyone felt bad, and they did whatever he asked without complaint. From a boss standpoint, it was nice, not having to argue your decisions to your team. But, they were more than his team. They were his friends, and he felt he lost them the same day he lost Haley.
Aaron greeted Spencer and Derek quickly, not wanting to get pulled into whatever discussion they were having. He was holding onto the letter tightly, afraid of losing it. He wasn’t sure what it was, but he just had a feeling about it. Like he had stumbled onto something huge, and whatever Garcia could find out would lead them to something unbelievable.
“Hey, Garcia. Any chance I could have you work on something… private, for now?” Aaron stood in the doorway of her office, all of the bright screens making him wince. His headache was only getting worse as the day went on.
“Of course, sir. Is everything okay?” She looked worried, for sure hoping that whatever secret task she was performing for him had nothing to do with Haley. Although he knew she would never say anything, he could tell she was worried about him.
“I need you to check deaths in Santa Fe, NM from May 5th - May 9th. Specifically look for men with teenage sons.”
“Just homicides?”
“No, any deaths. And see if you find anything suspicious.”
“Alright…” Penelope said, furrowing her brows in confusion. “It might take a bit. Santa Fe’s a big city.”
“Just get back to me when you can, Garcia.” Aaron smiled slightly at the technical analyst, before leaving quietly. His head was begging him for caffeine, or Advil, or a drink, even though it was barely 9 in the morning.
He walked quietly back to his office, not talking to any of his team, closing the door behind him as he got inside. There was a sick feeling in his stomach, most likely caused by the cigarette he snuck this morning on an empty stomach. He paced uncomfortably, dry swallowing an Advil he found in the back of his desk drawer. He knew it would take Garcia a while
to get his information, but he was feeling exceptionally frustrated and impatient. He started to walk towards the door, feeling the need to to pester his analyst to work quicker, but as he opened it, JJ stood pleasantly in the door.
“We got a case, boss,” she smiled, waving an envelope in the air.
“Alright, let’s get to the conference room.” Aaron closed the door to office, following his Agent into the annex. He felt sick as he took his seat, not ready for whatever horror was about to be presented. Some days he felt like giving up, like throwing in the towel. He has given this job everything he had, and what did he get in return?
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Aaron and the team left an hour later for their newest destination, solving the case within 3 days. They were headed back to DC on the jet when he got a call from Garcia. It was rare she would call him personally if they were not working a case, so he knew it must’ve been about the letter. He waited a moment before answering, anxious about what her news could be. What if she found nothing, and this was the end of the line?
“Hello, sir. I wanted to call as soon as I could.” She sounded nervous, a tone of confusion in her voice.
“What’s going on, Garcia?”
“Well, it’s about the letter. I found something… interesting.”
“Do you think we could have a case?”
“It’s a high possibility, sir.”
“Alright. Can you patch into the computer and share with the team. I’d like to bring them in on this as well.”
“Sounds good, see you in a moment.”
Aaron hung the phone up, walking back to the main part of the jet and back to the rest of the team. They were spread out, all enjoying the calming feeling of a solved case. Spencer and JJ were sleeping, Emily and Derek both with headphones in and Rossi reading a book. He hated to bother them, hated to disturb their peace they all deserved. But that was the job- there was no peace. They all had to endure constant chaos so that innocent people didn’t have to.
Aaron turned on the lights of the jet, alarming his team and causing several groans of frustration.
“What’s going on, Hotch?” Emily asked in desperation, her eyes squinting as they adjusted to the light.
“I’m sorry to bother everyone, but I think we might have a new case.” Aaron looked around the room, slowly watching the faces of his friends change from their relaxed state to the intensity of a profiler.
“Is this about… the thing from a few days ago?” JJ asked quietly, not wanting to bring it up if it wasn’t the case.
“The letter, yes.”
“Hello, my sleepy friends. I am sorry to bother you, but I have stumbled across something interesting that I believe requires your attention. Uh, Hotch… would you like to…” she trailed off, looking around for her superior to explain how they ended up here.
“I received a letter a few days ago… someone asking us to look into the death of their father. It was anonymous, there was a picture along with it but it still wasn’t enough to do much on my own. So, I handed over what I had to Garcia and…” Aaron trailed off, realizing now he hadn’t even asked Penelope what she got before bringing the rest of the team in.
“I guess that’s where I come in. So, as per our humble leader, I searched for deaths of men on the given dates with teenage sons, and as I expected, that list was quite large.”
“Why teenage sons?” Derek asked, still trying to fill in the gaps of information.
“The letter was clearly written by a young boy, no older than 16 was my guess,” JJ added, explaining her conclusion to the team.
“Garcia, were you able to narrow down the list?” Aaron asked, desperately wanting to know what she found.
“Well, I got rid of anyone whose death was expected. People who were sick or in the hospital, with underlying medical conditions, et cetera et cetera. Once we narrowed it down to deaths that were true accidents, I had a list of three.”
“How do we know this isn’t just a prank?” Rossi asked. It was a fair question, a question he frequently asked himself as well.
“Ah, well, if it was a prank I wouldn’t have found out what I did…”
“That looks like the face of someone who’s about to tell me I’m not going home tonight,” Derek laughed, turning to Emily, who rolled her eyes.
“Unfortunately it does seem like there’s a case here. One of the men that I flagged as ‘Could Be A Murder Victim’ has a… bad past.” One thing that Aaron always admired about Penelope is how she always managed to speak with such lightness, no matter how heavy the content of her words. “42-year old Derek Hood was killed on May 7th, ruled as an accidental drug overdose. There was some chatter that it may have been suicide, but there was no note and the family insisted he wouldn’t have killed himself.”
“So what makes you think it was murder?” Spencer asked.
“Alright, get this. Our man Jason was on trial two years ago for the rape of three different 16 year old girls. It was declared a mistrial, unfortunately, after all three of the girls refused to testify at his trial.”
“Is it possible he threatened them? This could be a revenge killing, if that was the case,” Emily added.
“Ah, I thought that too, my friend. But all three of the girls are now in college and far, far away from Sante Fe. So, that was kind of a dead end.”
“What about the parents?” Aaron questioned.
“We think alike, sir. All three of their families still reside in Santa Fe, and three weeks before Jason’s death, all three couples withdrew $15,000 cash from their banks. One family stated it was for a pool, the other for a car, and the last family stated it was for bathroom renovations.”
“Were any of those projects completed, Garcia?”
“To the best of my knowledge, no.”
“So this is what I think it is, then,” Rossi asked, looking up towards Aaron for confirmation.
“It’s most likely a hitman, yes.” Aaron looked around at his team, a feeling of worry drowning him. Hitmen were exceptionally dangerous, and so were the routes to get to them. It was an extremely well protected underground business, and the chances of catching one successfully, with no one hurt, were very slim.
“Wait, but our unsub is a woman. The photo very clearly showed a female, and even in the letter, the boy addresses her as ‘This woman.’”
“Could we see the picture, Garcia?” Aaron asked, staring at the monitor as he awaited the photo.
“Maybe they’re dressing as a woman to distract any possible witnesses?” Rossi added. The photo then popped up on the monitor, the same hidden person that was ingrained in Aaron’s brain. He couldn’t forget her, her shielded face, cheap wig, perfect body…
“That is definitely a woman, guys. You can’t fake that body…” Derek laughed, causing a wave of eye rolls and a slight shove of disgust from Emily.
“A female hitman… that is exceptionally rare.”
“Maybe she’s killing for justice? I mean, Jason was a piece of shit. And he somehow got away with his crimes, maybe this is punishment,” Derek added, always the first to try to come up with some sort of explanation.
“Why would she charge the parents almost fifty grand, though? That clearly makes it about money,” Emily rebutted.
“Garcia, is there any way we can find out who they gave that money too?” Aaron asked, hoping for a quick and easy answer, but he knew nothing was easy at this job.
“Since they took it out in cash, there’s no way to trace it, sir.”
“We’ll need to talk to the parents.”
“They won’t say anything, you know how that goes,” JJ said.
“We’ll target one of them, whichever is the most unstable. Promise them immunity. That usually works in situations like this.” Aaron looked at the team, noticing how tired they were. He knew how bad they needed to go home, sleep in their own beds, wash their hair with something other than hotel shampoo. But this was big, he could feel it. And they probably did, as well. It was their life, they were all aware of how crazy this career path could be. But, just because he knew that, it didn't make it any easier on Aaron when he had to push them to their limit. “We need to turn the plane around to Santa Fe. If this person is local, it’s best that we’re on the scene.”
“Can we at least stop home so I can get some new clothes?” JJ groaned, looking at the team in desperation for support.
“Fine. Can we be back in the air in two hours?”
“We can make that work,” Spencer agreed.
“Alright. Thanks, guys.”
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Santa Fe was hot. The kind of hot that made it impossible to breathe, and your clothes felt like they had melted into your skin. Aaron could feel his skin on fire, burning hotter and hotter as he stood under the desert sun. Emily stood next to him, glistening in a thin layer of sweat. The two of them stared closely at a house across the street, taking in every detail.
“You ready?” Emily asked, her voice cracking through the quiet air like a whip.
“Uh… yeah,” Aaron stuttered, his brain feeling off. He had a feeling whoever this person was, she wasn’t in Sante Fe. This was a big operation that they had stumbled upon, and he had a bad feeling about the way it would end up.
Aaron followed Emily to the door, feeling exceptionally guilty as they entered the front yard of a family whose lives had been destroyed- and all they were there to do was destroy them further. He knew they only did what they did to avenge their daughter- and he understood. Sometimes he wondered if he should’ve done the same thing with Foyet.
“Are you alright, Hotch? I don’t mean to overstep, but you don’t seem like yourself,” Emily questioned, stopping in her tracks before they made their presence known to the family.
“Just have a bad feeling about this one, I guess,” he responded, rubbing his head with his thumb and forefinger. “Let’s get this over with…”
“Aye aye, sir.”
The two of them walked to the front door of the small house, knocking slightly quietly on the white painted wood of the door. An older man opened the door, immediately tensing up as he saw the two of them. They looked like Agents- or at the very least, local detectives, and the man was pretty quick to understand why they were there.
“Are you Bradley Mathis?” Emily asked, standing a few inches in front of Aaron, clearly trying to take the lead on this. It was probably for the best, since his head was not on right today. In all honesty, his head hadn’t been on right since Foyet.
“Who are you?” Bradley asked defensively, crossing his arms across his chest and backing away from the door.
“Mr. Mathis, I want to assure you that if you cooperate with us, there will be no trouble. We understand you did everything to protect your daughter, and we aren’t looking for trouble. We just want to find the person who did this for you.” As Aaron spoke, he realized how scary this must be for him. His daughter was brutally attacked, they found the man that hurt her, and then he threatened her into silence so he could walk free. If it had happened to Aaron’s kid, he would’ve killed the son of a bitch with his own bare hands.
“You promise me nothing will happen to me?” He asked defensively, his eyes darting nervously across the room.
“I never met her, okay. I swear,” he responded in relief, as if he’d been waiting for the moment he could finally tell somebody. It was exhausting caring around those kinds of secrets. “I got her info from a friend. You go to the website, submit your claim, and she’ll send an assistant out to decide if she’ll take you on as a client. If she decides to help you, you’ll give half the money up front, and half upon proof of… death,” he whispered, closing his eyes as he spoke the words.
“That’s pretty standard practice for what she is…” Emily added.
“How did you find her website?” Aaron asked, wanting to leave this man in peace as quickly as possible.
“There’s some… tricks to finding her. Give me one second,” he said, turning around quickly and darting to another room. Emily reached for her gun defensively, but Aaron put a hand on her shoulder and shook his head.
“He won’t run.”
“How do you know? He has every reason to dart.”
“I just know. He’ll be back. Trust me.” Aaron looked to his Agent, kindly suggesting but also ordering her to relax. She nodded, crossing her arms as the pair waited for Bradley. As Aaron suspected, he came back a few minutes later with a beat up piece of paper.
“Someone I know from the support group gave me this. It’s how to contact her.” He handed them a brochure that was in pretty bad shape, but still legible enough to understand where to go. From the outside, it looked like a brochure for a dental surgery. But there were certain words highlighted, most likely by whoever gave Bradley this in the first place. It mapped out clear instructions on how to contact this mystery vigilante.
“That’s all I know. I swear.”
“I believe you,” Aaron responded, noticining the calmness flooding over Bradley’s face as Aaron spoke. “You can never tell anybody this, do you understand?”
Bradley nodded, his mouth glued shut as the reality of the situation finally weighed on him. He noticed the guns holstered to Emily and Aaron’s hips, and quickly shut the door, no goodbye’s needed.
“If she’s sending people to meet potential clients before she meets them, she isn’t local,” Emily put together, shaking her head in shock as the pair walked back to their car.
“No, she’s not. Which means we need to get back on the plane ASAP. Send this over to Garcia, I’ll call the team and tell them to meet us back at the jet.”
“Sounds good.”
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“Hello, angels. Are you ready for all the answers to your prayers?” Garcia’s voice popped through the stiff air of the jet, breaking through the harsh waters like a ray of sunshine.
“Were you able to find her, Garcia?”
“Of course, sir. Our girl is fancy. You need five grand upfront just to meet with her. Her website looks like it was designed for a five star hotel. She is legit.”
“Can we actually find her, Penelope?” Aaron had raised his voice slightly, frustration starting to set in. He just wanted this to be over, he wanted to bring her in and end this.
“Yes, yes. Sorry. Our girl goes by the name Ananke.”
“That’s not very intimidating,” Derek laughed, shaking his head as he sat back in his chair.
“Well, kind of. Ananke is a greek goddess, specifically known as one of the most powerful deity’s to control fate and circumstance. It’s pretty fitting, giving what she does.”
“The only way to meet her is to submit an appointment request, which is easier said than done. She has a legit system, requires a birth certificate, social security number, and a license or passport.”
“And five G’s,” JJ added.
“Can we create fake documents and submit them? Maybe have someone undercover go meet her.”
“I’ll do it. This has been my case from the beginning, I’d like to end it as well,” Aaron said, assuring his team he would finish this.
“I can get everything made up and submitted before you land.”
“Is there any way to figure out where she’s located?”
“Unfortunately not at the moment. I am still digging though, it’s possible I missed something.”
“Thanks, Garcia. We’ll see you soon.”
The team made some more small talk after that, realizing there wasn’t much they could do unless they had a location. Aaron’s head was beginning to throb again, absolute exhaustion overcoming him as he sat down and let himself relax for the first time in days. He missed Jack, he missed the comfort of his own bed, the smell of his cheap laundry detergent. He realized he was digging his nails into his palms, his flesh barely intact as he released his tension.
The rest of his team had broken up into their own conversations, ignoring the crumbling mess that was Aaron Hotchner. He walked to the bathroom quietly, snooping through the cabinets and finding a small bottle of vodka. He downed it quickly, letting the liquor burn the back of his throat and take his mind off of everything else. Even if it was for a moment, the distraction was welcomed, and almost necessary for him to keep going.
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It was two full days- almost forty eight hours exactly- when they finally heard back from Ananke. She had agreed to meet with ‘Zachary Wilson’ who was looking for revenge against the drunk driver that killed his wife. And to the whole team’s surprise, it appeared that she was located in DC. Ananke herself said she would meet him, stating that she was ‘in the area’.
The address she gave them appeared to be a popular nightclub in college town, one that Aaron had unfortunately been dragged to on multiple occasions. The team agreed that Aaron should meet her alone, the team standing outside to come in if necessary. She wanted to meet him on a Friday night, which meant the place would be flooded with innocent civilians. It was safest if they stayed out of it, at first.
By the time Friday rolled around, Aaron had barely eaten in days. He was staying alive on coffee, tylenol, and mini bottles of vodka he could keep in his pockets. Oh, and the occasional cigarette was a necessity as well. He had waited anxiously for what felt like weeks to meet her. This case had been weighing on him since the moment he received that letter, and he wanted it to be over. He wanted the anxiety and the chaos to be over. But, once they solved this one, there would just be another after, and the cycle of chaos and anxiety begins all over again.
“I hope you know you can't dress like that,” JJ said, teasing Aaron with a light shove as she walked past him.
“Why?”
“It’s… a business suit, Hotch. And you're going to a nightclub. It screams Fed.”
Aaron looked down at himself, realizing JJ was right. His vibes screamed ‘Cop’, and that was exactly what he did not want.
“Don’t worry, sir. I have something you can borrow from my go bag,” Derek suggested.
“Hotch in Derek’s clothes? That’s something I’ll pay good money to see,” Emily laughed, JJ giggling alongside her as Derek rolled his eyes and threw clothes at the two of them.
“You think these will work?” Derek asked the girls, not bothering with Aaron’s opinion.
“Oh, it’s perfect. Hotch will love these,” they laughed, neatly folding the clothes and handing them to Aaron. He walked away in silence, heading towards his office so he could change. The clothes weren’t a perfect fit, but they were better than his suit. The shirt was way too tight, with a v-neck that was way too deep. His arms felt like they would rip right through the cheap cotton, and his ass felt like it was going to bust straight out of the denim.
He began to walk out of the office quietly, hoping that the rest of the team wouldn’t be waiting for his fashion show. But as he figured, they were standing by patiently for him to show off in Derek’s way too tight clothes. As soon as he opened the door, a riot of laughs and cat calls surrounded him. He felt himself blushing, which was something he hadn’t done in a long time.
“Damn, Hotch. Where have you been hiding those arms?” Derek laughed, his voice echoing through Aarons head.
“I think we need to start casual Friday,” Spencer added, staring in awe at his boss.
“Alright, enough guys. This is a serious case, and I need everyone to be on their best behavior.”
“I’m not sure I can act right with you walking around like that,” Rossi joked, causing the rest of the team to burst out with laughter. Aaron just rolled his eyes, secretly appreciating the light that they all brought to his life.
“Alright, you guys ready to go?”
“All set. Let’s go catch a killer, sir.”
The ride to the club was a bit of a hike, a little over thirty minutes by the time they parked. They were split in two cars, seperated to cover both entrances. The plan was for him to go in and assess the situation, hoping he can get her out without harming any bystanders. If he needed backup, he had an alarm he could trigger that would alert the rest of the team to come in. It was a simple plan, one they had executed a thousand times in the past. But despite that, he felt extremely anxious.
“Are you ready, Aaron?” Rossi asked, raising his eyebrows in concern.
“Yeah, let’s get this over with. Stay alert, guys.” Aaron walked out of the car and to the entrance of the club, staring directly at the large bouncer standing in front of the door. He was given very specific instructions on what to see when he approached the man, ones that would deliver him directly to Ananke and avoid having to deal with the actual club.
“You on the list?” The bouncer asked as Aaron approached, not even bothering to look up from his clipboard.
“I’m here to see… A,” he whispered, looking around frantically to see if anyone else heard.
“You got your ID and confirmation number?” He asked, setting his clipboard down and staring intensely at Aaron.
“Uh, yeah. It’s 73491. And here’s my drivers license,” he responded, handing him the forged Virginia license of one Zachary Wilson.
“Zachary Wilson…” the man whispered, making Aaron sick to his stomach as he awaited the man to deny him and send him away, ruining his chances of finding her forever. “You’re gonna go in this door, right here,” he said, pointing towards a hidden and seemingly locked door to his right. “Take the stairs all the way up, knock on the door twice. She’ll be right with you.”
“Thank you,” he responded, relieved as he began to walk past the guard and towards his end goal.
“Oh, and Zachary,” the man added, causing Aaron to turn around in confusion.
“Remember: lei è dalla nostra parte,” he said, a smile creeping on his face as he spoke. Aaron recognized the language as Italian, but he couldn’t translate what he was saying. The bouncer turned around before Aaron had the chance to ask what he meant, but he figured it would just be better to move on and go directly to her.
He slowly opened the door, unsure of what he would find on the other side. To his surprise, it was only an exceptionally narrow staircase in a small hallway, leading directly to another gray door. The sound of fluorescent lights buzzed in the air, making Aaron dizzy as he walked up the steep steps. He remembered what the man said- knock twice. He also remembered the phrase in Italian, lei è dalla nostra parte. And when he finally got to the door, he began to unravel the words in his head. He knocked twice, replaying the words over and over. And when he finally heard the door click open, he understood what the man had meant. She is on our side.
“Zachary?” A man asked, opening the door slightly, only enough to peak out at him.
“Yes. I’m here to see-”
“Ananke. Of course,” he interrupted, swinging the door open and revealing an exceptionally beautiful and ornate room. Aaron walked in slowly, in a daze, his eyes not sure where to look as every piece of the room exceptionally thought out. There was a beautiful chandelier hanging from the ceiling, the light reflecting rainbows from the crystals.
“She will be with you shortly. Feel free to have a seat somewhere. Can I get you anything to drink?”
Aaron felt like he was at a hotel, the service impeccable as he sat down on the incredibly comfortable and probably very expensive couch. Most hit men he had met with did not present themselves like this. Whoever she was, she had a lot of money. In that moment, he wondered how many lives she had taken- how many people finally got what they deserved. And for a brief and frightening moment, he wondered if she was doing things right?
His thoughts were interrupted when she walked out. Not only did he lose his train of thought, but his breath was literally ripped from his chest. She was no longer covering her face, or wearing a wig. She had finally revealed herself to him, and he was in awe. She was absolutely stunning- beautiful to a level that made his head spin and his heart cramp up. He stood up instinctively, feeling the need to stand and greet her face to face. As she walked closer, he felt his throat getting tighter and tighter.
“Hello,” she spoke, her words floating through the air like a flower in the spring wind. “I’m Ananke.”
“Mhmm, he,” he stuttered, sticking his hand out to shake hers. “I’m…” he choked, unable to get his words out.
“Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner, right?” She smiled, and Aaron instinctively reached for his gun.
“Put your weapon away, Aaron. I’m no threat to you,” she instructed, and he complied. For some reason, he believed her. She had no intention of hurting him or anyone else in this building. He didn’t need his weapon.
“How do you know who I am?”
“The FBI has a list of Social Security numbers they regularly use for fake documents. It’s… a hard list to get your hands on. I’m lucky I have friends in high places.”
“So you knew who I was from the minute I submitted my application?” He was shocked, a sick feeling washing over him. Who was she? How was she consistently one step ahead of them?
“I’m sorry to break your sense of superiority, agent. It hurts when someone is smarter than you, doesn't it?” She tilted her head at him, a devilish grin pasted across her face. He wanted to hate her, he wanted to be angry, but all he could focus on was the fire burning inside of him and the hunger building itself, the craving overcoming her. Her skirt revealed a little too much of her thigh and her shirt was a little too low cut and the thought of her flesh on his rippled its way through his body.
“Well, we found you and I’m going to arrest you, so it doesn’t seem like you came out on top here,” he responded, avoiding eye contact as he tried to get his impure thoughts out of his head.
“Agent Hotchner, something you will quickly learn is that I only come on top.” She winked at him, pursuing her lips slightly and smiling. She held her wrists out to him, walking towards him until she was only inches away. “Are you going to arrest me, Agent?”
Aaron reached for the cuffs in his back pocket, pulling them out slowly and staring directly at her. She didn't take his eyes off of him, standing tall as he began to cuff her. Her hands were soft, almost comical as they brushed against his rough and untouched skin. He didn’t speak, and neither did she. He just closed the cuffs on her, her large eyes staring up at him like a doe. He felt dizzy again, the intoxicating smell of her perfume, the subtle hints of berries and vanilla surrounding him in a whirlwind.
He slowly grabbed his phone from his pocket, trying to dial Rossi’s number, feeling drunk as he pressed the button. What was wrong with him? And what was wrong with her? Why would she willingly let herself get arrested so easily? That was the problem. This was exceptionally easy. Nothing was ever this easy.
“Hey, Rossi. I got her. We’re coming down now.”
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Aaron wasn’t surprised that she remained silent the entire car ride back to Quantico. What he was surprised by is that she didn’t appear nervous or angry. She sat calmly, staring out the window, her body relaxed and her lips forming the slightest smile. It made him angry- he didn’t understand her nonchalance.
They tried to talk to her, ask her for her real name, about her crimes- but she would just look at them, tilting her head and smiling before bringing her gaze back outside. When they finally arrived back at the Bureau, she turned towards Aaron and Rossi, slowly speaking her first words in over thirty minutes.
“Am I allowed a phone call?” She asked, staring directly at Aaron, as if it was only the two of them in the car. For a moment, it felt like they were the only two people in the entire world.
“Who exactly would you like to call?” Rossi smirked, rolling his eyes, trying to get Aaron to look at him. But he couldn’t take his eyes away from her. He was drawn to her like a sailor at sea, listening to the sweet song of the siren. He understood, now, why the sailors always swam to their death. It was because it was so damn beautiful.
“I’d like to speak with the Director,” she insisted, her eyes finally releasing Aaron from his hypnosis as she looked in disgust at Rossi. He could sense the shift in her tone as she looked at the agent- she had built up a terrifying exterior that she had on display for most people. But when she looked at Aaron, the wall somehow didn’t exist. Why would she show her true self to a stranger? What was it about him that she was drawn too? Could she sense his pain? Did she know that he understood why she did what she did? That he, too, had felt the rush of ending evil with his own two hands?
“The Director? Of the FBI?” Rossi asked, shocked at her absurd request. “What exactly would you like to speak to him about?”
“I just think he’d be interested to know I’m here,” she spoke, calmly, sitting back in the seat of the car and looking out the window again.
“This girl is nuts…” Rossi whispered to Aaron before getting out of the car and grabbing ‘Ananke’ from the back seat. Aaron followed closely behind, his eyes locked on Rossi’s tight grip around her flesh. He could see the marks his agent was leaving behind, his fingertips dug into her arm. It made him sick. The thought of anyone harming her made him sick. But she was the bad guy- he was supposed to hate her, to send her away and avenge all of the lives she took. Why did he want to save her so bad? Grab her from Rossi, hop in the car and take her away from all of this. It didn’t make sense, the way he felt. And Aaron hated it- he hated feeling out of control of his own thoughts- his own desires.
As they brought her into the BAU, the rest of the team following behind, he immediately noticed something was off when he walked through the doors. The rest of the team must have noticed as well, because they all kind of stopped in their tracks as they walked in.
Derek noticed her first, pacing back and forth in Aaron’s office.
“Strauss,” he groaned, rolling his eyes at the sight of her.
“What is she doing here?” JJ asked, crossing her arms and tensing up.
“I’m not sure. I’ll go find out. Rossi, can you bring her into the interrogation room? Spencer, try and get something out of her,” Aaron instructed his team, watching them seperate and do their assigned tasks as he walked up to his office. When he got closer, he noticed the Director was also there as well. He got a sick feeling in his stomach, remembering his immediate thoughts when he first arrested Ananke. It’s never this easy.
He opened his office door with shaking hands, immediately slapped in the face with tension clinging to the air. The Director stood up as he entered, and Strauss stopped pacing.
“Aaron,” she whispered, her eyes darting nervously around the room.
“Erin,” he smirked, not sure why his brain was choosing this moment to crack jokes.
“It’s good to see you, Agent Hotchner. It’s been a while,” the Director said.
“Chris. It’s good to see you as well. Can I ask what you’re doing in my office?”
The two of them looked nervously at each other, as if deciding who had to tell him the unspoken secret. The first thought in his brain was that Foyet was back. He killed him, though. He remembered the life draining out of him. He couldn’t be back. He felt his body get hot, his breathing picking up as he remembered Foyet’s face…
“Aaron… unfortunately, we’re going to need you to let (Y/N) go.”
“Who?” He asked bluntly, confused at the name he was sure he had never heard before. Although his brain was still spinning, he was feeling calmer knowing whatever this was, it wasn’t about Foyet.
“Ananke. You need to release her,” Strauss clarified, her voice equally annoyed and apologetic.
“I’m sorry… I’m confused.” Aaron was realizing now how much easier it was to hate Ananke - or (Y/N) - when she wasn't right in front of him. He couldn’t see her, she couldn’t lure him in. Her spell had broken. “I know for a fact she killed at least one person. I’m not releasing her.”
“Aaron, this goes beyond you. She is no longer a person of interest.” Chris had raised his voice, clearly frustrated at whatever was happening.
“You can’t just take away my unsub and not tell me why. Do you think my team will be okay with that? Do you think I’ll be okay with that?” Aaron was angry, the thought of them taking her away with no reason making him crazy.
“Agent Hotchner, there are some secrets within the Bureau that even you don’t know about.”
“I don’t accept that.”
Chris and Strauss looked defeated, both accepting that they won’t win this battle. Chris shook his head slightly and closed his eyes, contemplating his words.
“What is going on, Strauss?” Aaron begged, the room beginning to spin again, his body craving the sweet release of nicotine and the bitter taste of vodka.
“Your unsubs real name is (Y/N) (Y/L/N). She is a government protected assassin.”
“What?” Aaron’s head was spinning, the room around him dancing in circles as the words floated through his mind. That couldn’t be real. There was no way the place he worked, that he believed upheld justice, would do something so… unjust. So immoral. They had to be lying. “It’s not possible. We met the man that paid her to kill someone. She was paid by a civilian to kill a civilian.”
“She sometimes takes on… side projects,” Chris muttered, clearly knowing his words would upset Aaron.
“And you allow that?” He yelled, his body fuming with anger as he paced around his office. It didn't make sense. Everything he had ever believed in was crumbling right before his eyes- all because of her.
“With the things she has done for us, Aaron, there is a little bit of lenience. Besides, Jason was a bad person, anyways.”
“That doesn’t make it okay. We have a justice system in place for a reason.” He felt sick, the realization that a system he protected for so long was seeping with corruption.
“Did Foyet get his chance for trial? Or did the justice system not count for him?” Strauss looked at him sternly, frustration written on her face. Aaron realized she was right. He took justice into his own hands with Foyet, and he didn’t regret it. How was she doing anything different? For a moment, nothing made sense to Aaron. His entire belief system had shattered right in front of him. He was speechless, his brain splashing around trying to find the right words to express his disbelief. But he was coming up empty, drawing blanks. There was truly nothing he could say that could capture how he felt. He just thought of her, the sweet smell of berries that lingered in her hair, the softness of her skin, the enticing aura that surrounded her when she looked at him.
“What am I supposed to tell my team?” He thought out loud.
“We’ll handle it. Let’s go out and talk to them now,” Chris instructed, walking out of the office and down towards the annex. Rossi noticed the three of them and quickly walked up to Chris, greeting him.
“Could you gather your team for me?” The director asked, Aaron still unsure of how he would explain this to them. Rossi grabbed everyone pretty quickly, dragging Spencer from the interrogation room, which Aaron could only imagine was going very poorly.
“Hello everyone, I’m sorry to bother you all, but the unsub you brought in today is a person of interest in several international crimes. She’s been on our watch list for a while, now, and we’re going to have to hand her over to interpol.” The Directors words were quick and precise, leaving no room for anyone to second guess him. Even Aaron was convinced they weren’t going to release her the minute they were alone.
“What has she done?” JJ questioned, intrigued at the mystery international criminal they brought in.
“It’s classified, Agent. And if you don’t mind, we’d like to get out of here rather quickly. If someone could grab her, please,” he ordered, causing Spencer to quickly walk to the room she was in and bring her back out to them.
She was smirking widely as she walked out, clearly knowing her freedom was inevitable. He had so many questions for her, so much he needed to know, but he had to keep his mouth shut. She was slipping right through his fingers, and he had only just begun to know her.
“I’m so sorry, Aaron. I know how much you enjoyed seeing me in handcuffs,” she whispered to him as she passed by, winking seductively before being taken away by the Director and Strauss.
Aaron felt miserable as she walked away, the three of them heading into the elevator and away from him forever. She now felt only like a ghost, a distant memory fading away as more time went by without her. The team moved on from the loss in a matter of minutes, but Aaron stood there, frozen in place, waiting desperately for her to come back.
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Five days. He was able to wait five days before he went to see her. He tried so desperately to forget about her- it seemed everyone else had. But she seeped into his dreams, tossing and turning as he tried to sleep, her voice, her face, her body, calling to him. He needed to see her again, just to ask her why. He wouldn’t sleep ever again if he didn’t.
So, five days after she walked away, he waited until Jack was asleep, explained to Jessica that he had some paperwork to take care of, and headed to see her. His brain continuously tried to tell him it was a bad idea. He should turn around, go home, and forget her. But he knew it was easier said than done. This was the only way.
When he got to the club, he noticed the same bouncer from before was sitting outside the door. Aaron felt a bit relieved, hoping the man would recognize him and he could lie his way up to (Y/N)’ door.
“Hey, man,” he said casually, trying to sound as calm and not suspicious as possible.
“Can I help you?” The man grunted, clearly not amused by Aaron’s attempt to be friendly.
“I’m here to see A. We met a few days ago, I need to drop my money off,” he whispered, praying to whatever God was listening that this guy would believe his story.
“A isn’t supposed to be meeting anyone tonight,” he groaned, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. Aaron could tell it was a long shot, but he had to do whatever he could to see her.
“Call her. She’ll tell you,” he stuttered, looking anxiously at the large man standing between him and (Y/N). It was possible he could take him down if he had to, Aaron thought. It would be a hell of a fight, but he’d brought down bigger men. He shifted instinctively, trying to casually feel his hip and make sure he was still armed.
The man pulled out a small phone that appeared to be very old- most likely a burner they used to communicate. He dialed a number quickly and stared at Aaron, as if hoping his boss would give him the go ahead to kick Aaron’s ass.
“Hey, it’s me. Some guy is here to see you. Said you talked earlier today. Can you check the cams,” he asked, trying to speak quietly, but Aaron was still able to hear every word. He waited patiently for her response, trying to keep his face calm.
“Alright, thanks A.” He hung the call up and placed the phone in his pocket, taking as long as possible to give Aaron his answer. It felt like hours, excruciating pain as he waited for his fate.
“You’re clear to go.”
Aaron was almost positive she would send him away. If she had cameras, she knew it was him. Why would she allow him to come up? Did she want to see him, too?
He knew if he stood there any longer contemplating the situation, he would look suspicious. So despite all of his common sense warning him that something was wrong, he walked through the secret door and up the narrow staircase, knocking twice at her door and awaiting to enter her world.
He was greeted by the same man from earlier, who was smiling brightly as he opened the door and let him in. He offered him another drink, which Aaron politely declined, finding a seat on one of the couches and unable to sit still as he waited for her.
She left him waiting for quite a while. Although it felt like hours of agony for Aaron, his watch assured him he had only been waiting around twenty minutes by the time she finally greeted him. She was wearing a short red dress, golden heels wrapped around her feet as she floated towards him, smiling devilishly as she poured herself a drink.
“It’s nice to see you again, Agent,” she teased, taking a sip of her liquor of choice and taking a seat across from him.
“I needed to talk to you.”
“About what?” She tilted her head, soft lips creating a pout of confusion as she stared at him.
“You knew I was going to arrest you the minute you got my application to meet… if you knew you couldn’t get in trouble, why would you let all of that happen? You could’ve called the Director the minute you knew who I was. Why didn’t you?” Aaron needed to know why she went through the trouble of setting up a meeting with him, allowing herself to be arrested and brought to the Bureau. It didn’t make sense, allowing herself to take such a big risk.
“It seemed… fun. Sometimes my life can be quite boring.” She smiled at him, her flirtatious grin that she seemed to save just for Aaron.
“Wasting my time, my team's time… that's fun to you?” Aaron was getting angry again, his body fuming as he looked at her.
“Well, maybe a part of me wanted to meet you. I mean, we’re not so different, Aaron.”
“Hah,” he laughed, rolling his eyes at her. “You think you and I have anything in common?”
“Oh, are you not the same SSA Aaron Hotchner who killed George Foyet with his own hands?”
“How the hell do you know that?” Aaron had stood up at this point, his anger and frustration causing his body to become restless.
“It’s on your record, Agent. It’s not too hard to find…” She took another sip of her drink, finishing the last of the cups content and standing up to face him. For a moment, they were inches apart, the air between them stock full of tension, anger and attraction swimming around the two. But as he prayed he could control his compulsion to touch her, she walked away, over to another corner of the room, grabbing a cigarette and lighting it.
The smell of smoke intoxicated him, making his knees shake as he craved the burn of nicotine in his throat. She floated back towards him, taking her place back on the couch and burning quickly through her cigarette.
“You seem so angry, Aaron.”
“Because you’re killing people, and somehow the people I look up to to maintain law and order don’t care.”
“Have you ever thought that you’re more angry at yourself than at me? I mean, a part of you gets it, right? You understand what I do, why I do it… and that makes you sick, doesn’t it?”
“I would never justify what you do.”
“Mm,” she hummed, standing up and walking towards him again. She placed a soft hand on his face, Aaron realizing her touch was the first he’d felt since Haley died. The feel of his flesh being caressed by someone, being held by someone- it made him melt.
“Maybe it’s not that, though. Maybe you really do hate me, hate what I do. But a part of you can’t stop thinking about touching me, feeling me… fucking me.” She moved her hand down his body, trailing her fingers down his chest and stopping at the base of his groin. He felt chills down his body, blood rushing to his cock at the slightest touch.
“That’s not- it’s not that,” he stuttered, trying to back away, knowing how dangerous it would be for him to get roped into something like this.
“Right, of course,” she whispered, taking her hand away from him and turning around, walking away. He watched her body as she floated across the room, his eyes glued to her ass that was begging to be touched by him.
“(Y/N)...” Aaron whispered, calling for her, unable to stand the feeling of her being away from him. She turned towards him, walking back slowly, taking her time and letting him simmer in anticipation as she made her way back to the center of the room. When she made her way back to him, he grabbed her chin with his hand, tilting her face up towards him, her lips inches from his.
“I would never want somebody like you. You are a bad person, no matter what you try to say to me.”
“Whatever helps you sleep at night, Agent,” she smirked, her lips almost brushing against his as she formed them into a smile.
At that moment, it felt like any self control Aaron had flew directly out the window. He wrapped his other arm around her waist, pulling her body into his and kissing her. It was a kiss that was draped in desperation, anger, lust. His tongue made no attempt to be gentle, selfishly exploring her small mouth and he picked her up and sat her on a table. He tore his shirt off, his desire to be touched, to touch her, overcoming any restraint he had before.
He picked her up, her small frame easy for his trained body to carry swifty to the couch. He threw her down on her back, her body writhing under his, moaning his name so loud that he was sure the club goers downstairs could hear. He wrapped his hands around her neck, gripping gently, listening to her gasp for air as he slid up her dress to reveal nothing underneath.
“You’re just begging for me, aren’t you,” he teased, pulling his hard cock out from his boxers and teasing her entrance with his tip. She nodded slowly at him, unable to speak as he still had his hand gripped around her throat. He was aching to hear her voice again, so he released his hand, getting turned on at the mark he left on her.
He slipped into her slowly, no time to waste on foreplay. He knew he needed her now, that their time was limited and it was only a matter of time before his common sense kicked in and he got out of there. But for the moment, he was sloppily pounding into her, not caring who saw or heard, desperately needing to be as close to her as possible.
He came quickly, the euphoria of feeling another woman for the first time in months too much for him to control. She came too, though. He could tell she wasn’t faking- he could feel it. After they finished, he quickly put his clothes back on, (Y/N) continuing to lay breathlessly on the couch. He watched her for a moment, waiting for her to say something- ask him to stay, kiss him goodbye. But she just pulled herself up and walked towards the other side of the room, grabbing and lighting another cigarette.
“You should go.” (Y/N) instructed, not even bothering to look up at the man who just came inside her moments ago.
“You shouldn’t smoke those, you know. They’ll kill you.” Aaron’s mouth was dry, watching the trail of smoke that followed her as she floated around the room, refusing to give him even a second of her time.
“What do I have to live for?” She asked, finally dragging her tired eyes to his and smiling, one of the first real, and saddest, smiles he had seen from her.
Aaron tried to think of something else to say, racking his brain for the correct words to say. But he continuously came up empty, and he realized he was starting to look more and more suspicious the longer he stood there. He decided to walk away, ignore the part of him that refused to tear away from her.
He walked soberly down the stairs, out onto the street and to his car. As he sat in his drivers seat and started the engine, feeling his face get hot, the rare feeling of wet eyes as he began to cry. And then he started to laugh. An uncontrollable cackle that spilled out of him like a waterfall. It was comical, to look back over the past few months and relive all of the bullshit he had been through. He didn’t even recognize the person in the mirror anymore. And maybe that was a good thing, because the person he used to be was the same person that let Haley die.
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Aaron tried to pretend he didn’t spend every day over the next week thinking about her. The way her soft skin felt when he touched her, the way her lips tasted like bubblegum and her hair smelled like cherries. When he imagined her in his head, everything felt so distant, like he was barely holding on to a dream of her. He could feel her memory slipping away every second, and he couldn’t let that happen.
He had to see her again, and soon. He wondered if she was thinking about him as well, if she remembered the mint chapstick he was wearing, or the Dolce cologne he was wearing. It made him sick, thinking that she forgot him. (Y/N) had slowly become everything to him, what if he was just a passing thought for her?
The team had landed back in DC an hour ago, solving a case in Miami that was one of the easier ones they had had this year. Aaron was grateful for the slight break, his brain not completely in the right headspace.
He rushed to finish up the closing paperwork, scribbling his words sloppily and without much care for grammar. He knew as soon as Strauss read his, she would call him and question his mental state. But he didn’t care. He just needed to get the hell out of here tonight, and if that meant sitting through another of Strauss’s evaluations, it was worth it.
As he was signing the last of the documents, he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. He grabbed it with caution, not sure who would be calling him this late at night. The call was coming from an unknown number, and Aaron immediately worried something had happened to Jack. He was away at his grandparents this week, planning on staying a few more days. He answered the phone nervously, preparing for whatever horror was to come.
“Hello, Agent,” a female voice said, a voice he instantly recognized as (Y/N)’s. Her voice flowed smoothly like silk even over the phone. It was truly hard to believe how she had managed to perfect every aspect of herself.
“Why- how are you calling me?” He looked around cautiously, making sure no one could secretly hear any part of the phone call.
“I’m flying to Paris this weekend, a little well deserved vacation. I was calling to see if you’d like to join me.”
“I… Paris? I can’t just fly to Paris.” Aaron chuckled into the phone, the idea of someone just getting up and deciding to fly halfway across the world with no plan truly comical to him.
“Oh, I didn’t realize I’d called the Fun Police. I thought this was Aaron Hotchner,” she teased. He could feel her smiling through the phone, a warmth that somehow seemed to wrap him even though he could only see her in his thoughts.
“I can have fun…” he argued, biting his lip awkwardly, not wanting to seem inferior to her.
“When was the last time you did something for yourself, Agent? Have you ever just… been spontaneous?”
“(Y/N), you don’t understand-”
“Call me A on the phone. It’s safer,” she instructed, her voice losing its soft luster as her professional side kicked in.
“A… my job, my life… it doesn't leave room for spontaneity.”
“No, Agent. That’s your choice. I’ll be at the jet runway at Dulles in two hours. Think about it. I’ll wait for you.” She hung the phone up, not giving him room to protest. He set the phone down on his desk, instantly missing her even more than he did before. Jack was going to be with his grandparents for three more days, and he did have some saved up vacation time. But what would he tell the team? What would he tell Strauss?
His phone vibrated again, this time only a single buzz to indicate a text message. He flipped his phone over and saw a new message from an Unknown number.
Life doesn’t have to be so complicated, Agent. It is much too short to spend this much time suffering. Learn to enjoy your days.
A
He reread the message a thousand times, knowing the words would still reign true no matter how much he tried to convince himself she was in the wrong. He had spent his whole life serving others, and he was okay with it, until now. Maybe if he had lived without complication, and enjoyed his days, his life would be completely different…
He ran home and quickly packed a bag, letting Strauss and Rossi know he needed some ‘alone time’ for a few days. They didn’t question it- one nice thing about having a recent trauma, he thought. He took an Uber to the airport, praying that (Y/N) kept her promise and waited for him.
When he finally arrived on the runway, he noticed her immediately. It was as if even being near her set an alarm off inside of him, like every part of his brain was awake, feeling her energy from a hundred feet away.
He thanked the Uber driver and ran to her, bag in hand. As he got to her, he noticed her face. She wasn’t surprised or shocked in the slightest- she knew he’d come. She somehow knew every move he would make. Was he that predictable… or was it something special between them?
“I have to be home in three days,” he said, breathlessly, overjoyed at the sight of his girl.
“We can do a lot in three days,” she responded, smiling wickedly. She walked towards him, wrapping her arms around his torso and embracing him. It was such a nice feeling to be held, comforted. He felt like he could stay there in her arms for years. But she broke the hug pretty quickly, motioning for one of her men to take care of the bags and began walking towards the jet.
As he followed her up the stairs and into their own private world, he started to remember everything he was leaving behind. The realization of just how impulsive this was dawned on him as he looked back at the city behind him. He felt dizzy, leaning on the railing for support as he shakily walked up.
“You alright?” (Y/N) asked, placing a hand on his arm to steady him.
“This is crazy, (Y/N). I just can’t believe I’m doing this.”
They continued to walk into the jet, her hand intertwined in his as they sat down and the door closed behind them. A man came out from behind the curtain, who Aaron immediately recognized as the same man who greeted him both times he met her.
“Aaron, this is my… well, assistant, I guess. Jay, this is my new friend, Aaron.” She waved to Jay slightly, instructing him to come closer.
“It’s good to meet you sir. Can I get the two of you anything to drink?” Jay was a short boy, couldn't have been more than 25. He clearly worshipped the ground she walked on, which seemed to be par for the course with men she knew.
“Oh, hmm,” she thought, closing her eyes for a moment as she racked her brain for a decision. “Whiskey sour. What would you like?” She turned towards Aaron, the subtle tilt of her head reminding him of how pretty her neck looked with his hands around it.
“I’ll do a Scotch, neat,” he ordered, something so enticing about ordering a drink on a private jet to Paris.
“I’ll grab those for you now. Matt is ready to take off, A, are you all set?” Jay turned back towards his boss, his eyes widening like a puppy as he waited for her words.
“I’m ready to go Jay, thank you,” she smiled, looking at him quickly before bringing her attention back to Aaron. Jay took her disinterest as a sign to leave and make their drinks, so he shuffled away quickly after she looked away.
He came back with their drinks a moment later, leaving quickly after and closing himself in the cockpit. The jet began to take off shortly after, and Aaron took a long sip of his drink, hoping the alcohol would calm any nerves he had left. He started at (Y/N) dreamily, as she shuffled through her phone and a pile on various paperwork on her lap.
“Sorry, Agent, just finishing up some work,” she whispered, her eyes still staring down.
“Mmm, it’s okay,” he responded, just happy to be in the same place as her again. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure,” she smiled, setting her work aside and bringing her attention to Aaron.
“Why did you kick me out the other night? After…” His voice trailed off, shifting awkwardly in his seat.
“I figured it be best for you. I didn’t want to wrap you up with my life… with me. But in all honesty, I can’t stop thinking about you. I called you tonight, and told myself if you didn’t show, I’d move on. But… you’re here.”
“I’m here,” he whispered back, his eyes tracing down her body, craving her once again.
“I feel like we have something special, Agent,” she whispered seductively, climbing out of her seat and walking towards him.
“I missed you… I couldn’t stop thinking about you…” he moaned as she bent towards him, her lips kissing down his neck and playing with the collar of his shirt. She unbuttoned the top buttons, kissing his chest and moving her hand to his inner thigh. She trailed her fingers up his thigh, teasing his cock with the slightest touch. His hips bucked uncontrollably, blood flowing down to him as his desire took over his body.
She got down on her knees, toying with his belt buckle. She was clearly trying to make him wait, the suffering and craving all a part of her game. But he was impatient, so he ripped his belt off himself, undoing his pants and pulling his erect penis out.
(Y/N) licked her lips in anticipation, wanting to pleasure him as much as he wanted to be pleasured. She played with his tip slowly, toying her tongue around him as he moved underneath her. He wrapped his fingers in her hair, slowly pushing her mouth down around him. He wanted her to take all of him, to feel the back of her throat as he shoved his length in her mouth. She moaned quietly as she took him, bobbing her head up and down quickly and sloppily.
Aaron couldn’t remember the last time he got a blow job- let alone the last time someone enjoyed giving him one. (Y/N) was toying with him, clearly enjoying the pleasure she was able to give him just with her tongue. She looked up at him as he was about to cum, winking as she dragged her tongue up his shaft. The eye contact sent him over the edge, causing him to release himself in her mouth. She swallowed his cum happily, kissing him on the cheek and sitting back down on her chair.
He wanted to go to her, give her what she needed now. But he was exhausted, the exhilaration of her taking away all of his energy. He took another hefty sip of his drink, leaning back in his chair and wiping the sweat off his forehead. He buckled his pants back up and readjusted himself in the seat.
“Don’t hate me, handsome, but I do have to get some work done. Feel free to sleep on the couch, or watch a movie. I’ll let you know when we get there.” She blew him a kiss, teasing him with a wink before losing herself in her work. He wondered what part of her job she could possibly be doing from the seat of a plane. There was truly so much he didn’t know about her, which made it so much more exciting.
He finished his drink, watching her work in awe as the plane soared over the Atlantic. He felt himself drifting off and didn’t try to stop it, wanting to be fully rested so he could make the most of his time with her.
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Paris was unarguably Aaron’s favorite place on Earth. Whenever he told people that, they always kind of chuckled. It was kind of a feminine city, at least that’s what everyone told him. But god, he loved it here. The food, the architecture, the people… but most importantly, it was her.
She had made every second of his life magical. When they landed, she brought him to a small bakery near the Louvre, where they sipped wine and ate the sweetest fruit he’d ever tasted. It was only 10 AM when they got there, but nobody seemed to pay them any attention as they drunkenly strolled down the Parisian streets, giggling and kissing and living.
When they finally sobered up, they made their way to a gorgeous hotel, where (Y/N) got the nicest suite available. They ordered a few bottles of champagne, popping them open as soon as they got inside and helping themselves to many glasses. They drank out on the balcony, overlooking the whole city as they downed more alcohol.
The suite came equipped with a jacuzzi tub in the bathroom, which (Y/N) was begging him to take advantage of. She stripped down in front of him, lighting candles and drawing a tub of steaming water. She took a bottle of champagne into the bathroom and soaked herself in the tub, lavender scented bubbles surrounding her. Aaron couldn’t resist the temptation of her body, so he quickly followed after her, stripping down and slipping in the bubbles with her.
She sat on his lap, he kissed down the back of her neck and nibbled on her flesh. She moved her butt into him, the softness of her flesh pushing into his cock.
“I told you, sometimes it’s fun to be adventurous.”
“I never doubted that. I just think this is all… crazy…”
“Are you not enjoying yourself?” She giggled, pushing bubbles towards him and splashing around the water.
“Oh do not play games with me,” he laughed, splashing water towards her. She squealed when the water hit her face, scrunching her nose as she wiped the bubbles from her cheeks.
“Let’s go,” she smirked, standing up and carefully stepping out of the bath. Her skin was glistening from the water, bubbles dripping down her flesh. He stared in awe at her, obsessed with every curve, every inch of her more perfect than the last. She walked slowly out of the bathroom, her butt wiggling with every step. She was clearly calling for him, begging for him to follow her wherever she went. And he would. He did.
He ran after her carefully, finding her naked body wrapped in the fluffy comforter of the bed. She smiled when she saw him, sitting up and wrapping her hands around his neck. She brought his face towards her, kissing him slowly, allowing their lips to enjoy every second they had with each other.
Aaron’s hands were gripped on her hips, his naked body grinding into hers. He hadn’t known this feeling for a long time- the feeling of complete and total calm. For the first time in an absurd amount of time, he wasn’t worried. He wasn’t thinking of every terrible thing that was happening around him. He was only thinking about her- the way her lips felt on his, the way her body moved… his whole life had so suddenly become wrapped up in her.
But, the trouble was, nothing good in his life stayed. And it was only a matter of time before the universe took her away, too.
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The rest of their time in Paris went by in a daze. Most of their time they were either drinking or fucking, taking breaks to walk aimlessly around the Louvre and stroll down the Seine. He was heartbroken when he had to go back, but he did miss his son, and was sure the team was falling apart without him. When they landed back in DC, (Y/N) had a car ready to take Aaron home.
He had a good hour before Jack would be back, so he used his time to take a long shower and brew a strong pot of coffee. It was almost 7 at night, but his body was still messed up from the change in time zones, and he knew he wouldn’t get much sleep that night. He was already missing her, checking his phone every five minutes to see if she would whisk him away on another adventure.
But, as he quickly learned, she was the type of person to disappear for a while. Aaron didn’t hear from her for seven full days after Paris. Seven full agonizing days of wondering where she was, who she was with, and most importantly- what she was doing.
Being away from her made it easier for him to realize the reality of their situation. She was a killer; and yeah, maybe she only killed ‘bad’ people, but did that really make it any better? At least, that was the question he was asking himself. Surprisingly, as more time went on, the harder time he had convincing himself she was a villain. Maybe it was because he was falling in love with her, maybe it was because he understood the anger of watching guilty people walk away from things completely unscathed.
They didn’t speak about work once during their time together, although it was clear Aaron had a lot of questions. He couldn’t even begin to comprehend what she could be doing for Strauss and the Director. Who was she killing that they couldn’t get to the normal way? He wanted to know her life, understand the secrets she spent her existence protecting- but it wasn't for him. And maybe that was for the best. The mystery of it all made it… hotter.
So when he finally heard from her, seven full days later, he felt like a kid on Christmas. He recognized the ‘unknown’ number as it popped up on the screen, stepping into his office so he could speak with her privately.
“Hi, Agent,” (Y/N) spoke, her voice singing to him. He loved the way she called him Agent. He loved everything about her.
“I’ve missed you. Where have you been?”
“Oh, working. You know.” He could tell she didn’t want to speak any more about work, so he changed the subject.
“Are you back in DC?”
“For a bit.”
“Can I see you? Let’s get dinner somewhere. Anywhere.”
“I… we probably shouldn’t be out together like that… if we saw anyone we knew… your team…” She spoke her words carefully, not sure how to tell him that their relationship wasn’t exactly approved of. Aaron had never really thought about it, but the reality made him sick. Would he never be able to love her publicly? Hold her hand at the park, take her to eat at his favorite restaurant, introduce her to his friends?
But the adrenaline, the euphoria of being with her- it was worth any negatives. He would eat in the dark with her, hide her in his house, runaway with her…
“Come over to my place, then. We’ll order pizza, watch a movie.”
“Hah,” she giggled, her laugh airy and full of light just as he remembered. Hearing it made him smile. “I can’t remember the last time I ordered pizza and watched movies with a boy…”
“Well, given the circumstances, I have to get creative A.”
“What about Jack?”
“Oh,” Aaron responded, forgetting for a moment that she had yet to meet his son. He didn’t think twice about it, wanting his son to know the woman that was bringing him so much joy. But was it safe? And did she want to know him?
“I don’t want to put you in an awkward situation.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Of course.”
“What is happening between us? Are we just messing around… Is there feelings?” He hated to ask her such a loaded question over the phone, but he needed to know the answer- he had to know if she was just as head over heels as she was.
“Agent, no man I’ve ever ‘messed around’ with has this number.”
Aaron chuckled, the nervousness in his chest subsiding.
“Come over tonight, please,” he begged, craving the way her lips felt on his.
“Okay, I’ll see you tonight, Agent.”
“I’ll see you tonight, A.”
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Aaron didn’t expect just how wonderful (Y/N) would be with Jack. He had never really seen a maternal side to her before, but she was incredible. Jack took a liking to her as well, even falling asleep between the both of them as they watched Finding Nemo. After they were sure he was asleep, Aaron carried his son to his room and put him to bed, (Y/N) following close behind, in awe of the way Aaron cared for his son.
“You want a glass of wine?” Aaron whispered to her, the two of them hand in hand as they walked back to the living room.
“Please!”
He poured the two of them overly generous glasses of Riesling, snuggling up on the couch next to her and kissing her on the forehead. They tried to find a movie for a bit, scrolling through endless channels before giving up.
“Can you stay the night?”
“I wish, but I have to catch an early flight tomorrow,” she frowned, her pout showcasing her perfect lips that he couldn’t get out of his head.
“Where are you going?” As soon as the words left his mouth, he wished he could take them back. Her face turned pale and emotionless as she thought of a response, taking a deep breath and closing her eyes.
“You know I can’t tell you that,” she responded.
“I’m sorry.” He felt uncomfortable, not sure exactly what to say to her. They had never had an awkward silence before, and it made him sick as he waited in the quiet for her to respond.
“I probably should get going,” she finally said, setting her almost empty glass of wine down on the coffee table.
“Oh, c’mon, we just got some time alone…” he pleaded, but he could tell by the look on her face he had already lost her.
“I’m sorry, love. I just have a lot to prepare for this case.”
“I understand. Will I see you soon?”
“I’ll do my best, Agent.”
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California was a popular hot spot for serial killers. It seemed like Aaron and the team were there every other week. This time, San Francisco was the lucky city. He had already been there for two days, stuck on an incredibly weird case, when he got the call.
“Good morning, Agent,” (Y/N) spoke.
“A… it’s good to hear from you.” He was relieved at the sound of her voice, the dark energy of this specific case seeping into him, choking any optimism out of him.
“How are things?”
“I’m working on a tough case, to be honest. It’s taking a lot out of me.”
“Would it be better if I was there?”
“How is that possible?”
“I was… in the area. Set some time aside to stop by.”
“I’m going to be really busy…” he frowned, realizing now how difficult it would be to actually see her.
“Oh, Agent, I sure hope you can make time to see me,” she teased, giggling through the phone, her laugh wrapping him in warmth and shielding him from the darkness of reality for a moment.
“Well, I have to sleep at some point,” he responded, laughing himself.
“Call me when you get back to your hotel. I’ll be waiting.”
Aaron hung the phone up quickly, peeking around the corner of the SFPD office they were currently set up in. Luckily, everyone was too busy to listen in on his personal conversations. He wondered what his team would think if they knew what was going on behind closed doors. Would they still stand around and trust the system they were working so hard to uphold? Because Aaron could barely stomach it.
“Hey, we’ve got a problem,” Derek said, coming around the corner lookingfor his superior.
“What’s going on?”
“C’mon into the conference room. Garcia will explain everything.”
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He didn’t make it back to his hotel for another 12 hours. It was nearing 11 PM by the time he finally closed the door and could be done for the day. Although with his job, he was never really off the clock.
He called (Y/N), pushing aside any exhaustion he had for a moment with her. She was there within twenty minutes, sneaking through the door, giggling and kissing quietly, trying to be secretive. It was risky, extremely risky for them to be together with his team just on the other side of a thin hotel wall. But he couldn’t help himself. A part of him wanted to get caught, be exposed, so they could stop sneaking around. He wanted to love her in front of everyone.
He forgot about the case briefly as he lost himself in her flesh, kissing her soft skin and making love to her - twice. When the exhaustion finally overcame him, he crawled into her arms and let the horrors of his job overcome him.
“It’s a bad one, this case,” he divulged, knowing he shouldn’t be telling her the details, but needed a release. He needed to scream, and she was the only one around to hear.
“What’s going on?”
“Some CEO’s kid has been going all around the country killing teenage girls. Eevrytime the police get close to him, he just runs. Five different cities, and he’s escaped them all. Thirty six bodies that we can find. Probably more. And he’s going to get away, here, too. Garcia found out he sold his house a few days ago and bought one in Miami.”
“Well if you know it’s him, why aren’t you arresting him?” (Y/N) had a confused look on her face, her eyes wide and her lips forming a slight pout as she waited for him to respond.
“We don’t have enough physical evidence. He fits the profile perfectly, and we are able to trace bodies to him in every city he’s lived in. But that’s not good enough for the courts. He’s just going to keep getting away…” Aaron felt his heart pounding, the face of Foyet flashing over and over in his head.
“Sometimes… the system doesn’t help everybody.” She wasn’t looking at him, her eyes darting nervously around the room.
“That’s why people like you exist, right? To serve justice to those who escape it.”
“That’s one way of looking at it.”
Aaron looked at her, her cheeks flushed and her breathing sporadic. They were thinking the same thing, it was only a guessing game on who would break the silence first. He didn’t think it would be here, she was too nervous.
“(Y/N)...” he whispered, placing a hand on hers.
“What are you asking me to do, Agent?” She finally looked up at him, her face flat and emotionless, a side of her she had never shown him before. It was her work face, her business face.
“I want you to do your job, A.”
“Are you sure that’s what you want?”
“It’s the only way to stop him.”
“Okay. I’ll take care of it.” She got up out of the bed and started putting her clothes back on, slowly redressing herself as she prepared to go back to work. She grabbed one of the three phones she carried, hastily dialing a number and putting the old cell to her ear.
“Hey, it’s me. I need the car here ASAP, and the bag... Yeah, it’s a change of plans. … I’ll tell you in the car.” She hung the call up and put the phone back in her bag, refusing the look at Aaron the entire time she was preparing herself.
“You’re doing this now?” He laughed, getting up and trying to stop her from leaving. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her towards him, her body struggling to get away. She felt tense, tired. Her body was no longer surrounded by it’s usual warm glow. She was cold, and dark. She wasn’t her.
“Agent, if this is what you want, I need to handle it my way. Please let me go.”
“Will you… can I see you after?”
“I need to leave the city immediately after it’s done. And it’s best we don't talk for a bit. I can call you when I think things are safe.”
“How long is a bit? I mean, I don’t want to give you up.”
“You can’t have both, Aaron. Either I’m (Y/N) or I’m Ananke. Do you want more girls to die? Or do you want a girlfriend?” She was yelling, her voice a loud and intense version of itself that he was unfamiliar with. It made him dizzy. He sat down clumsily on the bed and put his face in his hands.
“Kill him,” he mumbled. She was quiet for a few seconds, and so was he. And awkward silence. Something they had never had. He felt like she was staring at him, but he couldn’t bring himself to look at her.
“I’ll call you when I can, Agent. It’s been wonderful working with you.”
Aaron swore as she walked out the door he could hear her cry. Maybe he was making it up to make himself feel better. There was no way she could walk away that easily and not … hurt. He hurt, so terribly bad. How long was a bit? A few weeks, months? Would he ever see her again?
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Aaron awoke to a loud banging on his door and his phone buzzing like crazy. The ringer was on, but not loud enough to awaken him from his alcohol assisted slumber. He shouldn’t be drinking on the job, he knew that rule better than anyone. But he had to shut his mind up.
He opened the door to a rattled Derek Morgan, his forehead sweating and hands shaking.
“You are not going to believe this,” Derek said, chuckling slightly.
“What’s going on, Morgan?” Aaron knew what he was going to say, but he had to pretend to be surprised. Would Derek know? He was by far the best profiler on the team. How long could Aaron keep up a lie before Derek figured something out?
“Our unsub died last night. Car accident. He hit a railing and his car just… exploded.” Derek held his tablet out to Hotch, showing him various photos from the scene. His car was completely crushed and torched. You could see his body, but there was absolutely no way to tell what was happening at the time of the accident. The damage of the car was far too elaborate to find any remnants of explosives- if that’s what she used. But whatever she did, it was brilliant. There was no way anyone would think twice about this. She was brilliant.
He could feel himself smiling, being impressed with her work- but he remembered Derek was still standing there, unknowing of the secrets Aaron held.
“Well, I guess we can finally get the hell out of San Francisco,” Aaron laughed.
“You think this is the end? He just dies in a freak accident and it's over? Are we that lucky, Hotch?” Derek’s eyebrows were furrowed in the classic way his face always looked when he was suspicious.
“He’s not around to hurt anyone else, and that’s the end of it. Our jobs are done here. I want wheels up in an hour.”
Derek just nodded in agreement with his supervisor, realizing it wasn’t worth the argument. Aaron was right, the bad guy was gone and that was good enough for him.
Aaron closed the door to his hotel, grabbing his phone and dialing her number. He had assumed she’d already disconnected the line, severing their connection for the time. But it rang, and somebody answered.
“A…?” he whispered, waiting for her voice.
“You shouldn’t be calling this number,” a man responded, a voice he recognized as Jays.
“I know, I know, but please. Please just tell her something for me.” Jay was silent for a moment, deciding what to do.
“... What?” He asked, quietly.
“Please just tell her I said thank you. For everything.”
And then the phone disconnected. The call was over. She was gone. For who knows how long?
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One week later, SSA Aaron Hotchner was sitting in his office when Erin Strauss walked through his door. She didn’t knock, which made him jump. She walked right in and sat down on his couch, taking a deep breath. A disappointed sigh.
“Hello, Erin.”
“Agent Hotcher.” She looked at him angrily, her lips pursed and eyes tight as she thought of her words.
“What can I do for you?”
“In all honesty, Aaron… did you think we wouldn’t find out? You are a federal agent. Your passport is flagged any time you enter a foreign country. You were in Paris at the same time as her. And then San Francisco? She was there on assignment and your uncatchable unsub just happens to turn up dead?”
“Am I fired?” He asked, his only thought on what they were doing to her.
“Aaron… what are you doing? You are losing yourself! If this is about Haley…”
“Just tell me something. What are you going to do to her?” He bit his lip nervously, Erin avoiding his eye contact.
“Right now she’s being relocated, on a six month assignment. We’ll see what happens after that.”
“Where?”
“You know I can’t tell you that!”
Aaron sat for a moment, completely unsure of what to say next. Maybe Erin was right, he had lost himself. He would’ve never imagined himself in this situation.
“What do I do now?”
“You move on. And you do your job, the right way. I’ll cut you some slack this time, Aaron. But if this happens again… there will be consequences. Do you understand?”
“Yes ma’am.”
Erin walked out of his office quietly, closing the door as she left. He waited a moment, a long moment, before pulling out his phone. He had to at least try to talk to her. Even if the number didn’t work. He had to try.
But it rang. And this time he knew it was her who answered.
“Agent.” She answered sharply.
“Where are you?”
“I’m still in DC, as of now.”
“If I asked you to stay, would you?”
“You know it doesn’t work like that. Either I go, or they send me to prison. I’m sorry, Aaron. But this… was destined to fail from the beginning.”
“No, (Y/N). I don’t accept that. I love you.”
“You can’t. I’m sorry, Agent. This is goodbye.”
#vicficwriterchallenge#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x reader#criminal minds#aaron hotchner fanfiction
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Together
Summary: Aaron Hotchner x Fe!Reader -> The team knows something is up between yourself and Hotch, except Rossi seems to be the only one to put the pieces together.
Disclaimer: Descriptions of sick. Fluff. Jack and Haley don't exist in this fic. Happy ending. Not Proof Read.
The whole team knew something was up. They just didn’t know what.
Usually, you were normal with everyone. Chatty. Smiley. Professional. Maybe a little blunt every now and again.
But not this time.
For the last week you had been…cold. Well, not with them, at least.
But with Hotch? You had been as cold as ice.
But no-one could pin why.
Even if it had just been small things, like the feeling in the meeting room in the morning when it just seemed to be the two of you, or the small looks you both gave each other – which had started out as awkward, but then quickly turned to shame and clear annoyance, the latter being much more clear on your end. It was definitely clear now.
From the beginning of the case, you had been quick to change subjects. Always staying on the case, which was normal. But not your abruptness to do so. And when Hotch tried to pull you aside as the others made their way to the main doors, you brushed him off.
Hotch was someone you never brushed off. Not until recently.
And when you all landed in Seattle, Hotch was assigning teams for who was driving. But before he could place you with himself, JJ and Morgan, you pushed past him.
“I’m going with Rossi.”
And Hotch didn’t say a word.
Instead, he watched you walk away with your go bag, throwing it into the trunk with Dave. He gave his orders to Prentiss on what would happen and she updated you in the car.
However, forty five minutes into a ninety minute drive, Emily’s voice started to make you feel dizzy. Then the heat in the car felt like it was blasting. So you rolled down the window. But that didn’t help.
“Garcia said she’s already sent over some case files- Hey, you okay?”
From the backseat, Emily leaned forward to get a better look at you.
“I’m fine.”
But five minutes later, you changed your mind.
“Pull over.”
“What?”
“Pull over, I think I’m gonna be sick.”
“Okay, okay. Just hold on.”
The car had barely been put into park by the time you threw the door open, tore your seatbelt away and ran out.
Less than ten feet from the open car door, the last three drinks and meal you ate came straight back up and soaked into the dry grass.
You heard a second car pull up behind and then heard Morgan and Hotch’s voice. Dave had already reached you, placing a hand on your back before pulling your hair back.
“Okay, take it easy. Are you okay?”
You could only hum before throwing up once more. He rubbed circles on your back for a moment before you finally finished throwing up and wiped your mouth with the back of your hand.
“Is she okay? Y/n, are you-”
“I’m fine!” You called out, a little harsher than you had intended.
Holding out a hand, Rossi signalled for Hotch to stop and stay where he was with the others.
“She’s okay, she just needs a minute. Emily, do we have water in the car?”
“Yep, here.”
Making her way over, Emily poured some water onto a tissue before handing it to you. You wiped down your mouth and your hand before being handed the bottle by Dave.
“Small sips, okay? Are you sure you’re okay?”
You nodded, your back still to the rest of the team. “I just need a minute.”
“Aaron, we’ll meet you there.”
It took him a minute before he moved back to the car, but Hotch eventually nodded, calling out they’d see them at the precinct.
“Do you know what it could be?” Emily asked.
“Probably just some bad sushi.”
Emily nodded before getting back into the car.
“Are you sure that’s all it is?” Rossi asked once she was out of earshot.
And for a moment, you paused.
“Let’s just get going.”
Things only seemed to get worse from there.
You managed to hide it as best as you could from the rest of the team, but every hour you had spent a good ten minutes in the bathroom throwing your guts up.
A couple of officers did question where you had been when they couldn’t find you but hadn’t seen you leave the building. One mention of Aunt Flow and they didn’t ask again.
Your coldness with Hotch didn’t ease, either. It just seemed to become more frigid. And everyone saw it.
By the third day in Seattle, Prentiss and Morgan had questioned you on it in the break room.
“Yeah, what do you have against Hotch all of a sudden? What, one week away from us and you’ve suddenly made an agenda against him?”
“Because I love you, I’m going to ask this only once. Please don’t ask about Hotch.”
Morgan and Prentiss looked between each other, slightly worriedly, but both silently agreed to drop it.
“But you will sort it out?”
You bit the inside of your cheek. “I don’t know.”
A few hours later, you were coming back out of the bathroom when Rossi seemed to jump out at you.
“Jeez. Rossi. Give a girl some warning next time.”
Dave smiled. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”
“Have we caught a break?”
“No, but I need to talk to you.”
“What about?”
“About the fact you’re running to the bathroom every hour to throw up.”
“Like I said, it was probably just some bad food. I’ll be okay.”
Only, as you started walking away, Rossi asked you a question.
“What happened between you and Hotch?”
“Nothing.” You answered, your back still to him.
“Really? Because I wouldn’t call it nothing. I’d call it strange.”
“Rossi, I’ve asked Morgan and Prentiss-”
“I know, and I heard. But, to be frank, I think you’re lying and you’re too scared to tell anyone.”
“Tell anyone what?”
But rather than voice it, Rossi just gave you a look. It took you a moment before you cracked a little.
“Rossi…”
“You don’t have to tell me how or what happened, but I’m asking, just find out the truth. You don’t have to tell anyone. But I think the sooner you do it, the better it will be.”
“We’re in the middle of a case.”
Rossi shrugged, “Morgan and JJ are on their way back. Reid’s got it handled here. We’ll pick up some coffee on the way back as a cover. Let’s just go now.”
You seemed to hesitate, and Rossi could see it.
“Please, for my sanity's sake?”
“Okay.”
Twenty minutes later, you found a pharmacy and picked up a box.
“Can you wait outside the door for me?”
“Of course.”
And he did.
Once you paid for the box, the cashier directed you to a bathroom in the back. Except, long after the two minutes were up, you still hadn’t come out. So, Rossi knocked on the door.
You swung it open and he jumped back a little.
“I can’t look at it.”
“Well, you’re gonna have to at some point.”
“I’ve wiped it down and it’s got a cap but…can you look? I’m too scared.”
Rossi could see the fear in your eyes. Oh, how two little lines could instil so much fear into people who dealt with crime every day.
Handing the package to Rossi, he turned it around and pulled it out of the packet.
“I believe congratulations are in order.”
Turning it around so you could see, you took it back into your grasp as you pushed one hand through your hair.
“Oh, my god.”
“I think you and Hotch need to have a conversation.”
“Please don’t tell anyone.”
Rossi smiled, holding your hand which he could feel shaking. “You have my word.”
Somehow, back in the precinct, you managed to keep your cool. You’d brought back coffee for the team and, despite the fact you caught Hotch watching you from his seat, noticing your shaking hand, you pulled it back and found a spare pen from JJ’s notepad and spun it over and over in your fingers.
Thankfully, due to the “food poisoning”, you had been kept out of the field when it came to finding the unsub. However, this just gave you a very large sense of dread. You watched them all run out of the door, Rossi placing a hand on your arm talking directly to you.
“I’ll look out for him.” He told you before the others could hear him.
“Thank you.”
Possibly carrying Hotch’s child made watching him and the team run out of the door, without you, made that sense of dread practically triple. Especially considering no-one other than Rossi knew the truth, or at least a part of it, about yourself and Aaron.
Thankfully, no-one got hurt and the unsub was apprehended in time before he could hurt anyone else. They all came back with looks of relief and tiredness when you saw them, but there was a barely visible look of confusion and perhaps, hopefulness, on Hotch’s face when your scowl at him didn’t seem so cold.
On the plane ride back, you were quiet. Everyone was, but there was just an air about you that told those paying attention to you that you were in your own world.
Of course, Rossi knew why.
But it was tearing at Hotch why he didn’t.
Pulling back into the office, Penelope greeted you all by the elevator, hugging you all. And handing you some dry crackers and a bottle of water.
“Thanks, Garcia.”
As everyone said their goodnights, you watched as Hotch walked directly through the bullpen and towards his office.
“I think there are a couple of things you and he need to talk about.”
You nodded, with a light smile. “You’re right.”
Rossi kissed you cheek before saying goodnight and saluting you before the elevator doors closed. You did a small one back before turning your gaze back to the dim lights coming from Hotch’s office.
However, first, you ran to the bathroom.
Sitting at his desk, Hotch was halfway finished with the last of his reports when a knock came to his door.
Looking up from his desk, there was a slight look on his face that told you he wasn’t expecting you. And you couldn’t be surprised. You’d barely been able to look him in the eye for the last month and a half, and you’d been nothing but cold and if a little harsh with him for the last couple of weeks.
“Is everything okay?”
“Can we talk?”
Hotch nodded. “Come on in.”
You nodded back, entering, but closing the door behind you. Which made Hotch stand.
“Is everything-”
“I’m pregnant.”
A silence settled over the room that you were expecting, but still shocked you. And every possible emotion, some you couldn’t even name, passed over his face before he was forced to sit down.
“Oh.”
“Can I sit?”
He nodded, quickly signalling for you to do so. And so you did.
“What did…How- When did you find out?”
“Sometime in the last twenty four hours.” You answered which confused Hotch, which you could understand. It was a vague explanation. “It’s all been kind of a blur.”
He nodded, understanding what you meant.
“Does anyone…know?”
You nodded. “Rossi.”
“Dave knows?”
“He seemed to know before I did…kinda.”
“What does that mean?”
“I guess I had a feeling when I got carsick, but denial carried me through.”
“Does anyone else know?”
You shook your head. “No. Oh, and, um, I-I took another test to be sure. H-here.”
With a lot of nerves and a lot of awkward courage, you passed the second test across the desk to Hotch who took it in his hands and looked at it.
Two bright pink lines.
Positive test.
“Just so I’m…clear. You are telling me because I’m…”
“The father?” you questioned. “Yes. There wasn’t anyone before or after you for it to be someone else.”
Hotch nodded. “Okay.”
You both sat in silence for a while, taking in what had just happened.
“I, well, I haven’t been to see a doctor yet so I can’t know for certain but these tests are usually pretty accurate.”
Hotch could only nod.
“You’re free to make any decision you wish,” Hotch assured you. “I’ll support you either way.”
You nodded in a small thank you. “Honestly, I don’t know what I’m going to do. With our line of work, it gives you the handbook over why you shouldn’t have children. But, if I do decide to do this…I’m prepared to do this on my own. If I am going to do it, I’d prefer to have you in their life.”
Your hand absentmindedly touched your stomach and you looked down to it for a moment.
“But, I’m prepared to do it on my own.”
Hotch took in everything you said and nodded. “Like I said, I’ll support any decision you make but if you do decide to have our child…”
Those two words settled over the both of you.
Our Child.
Our Child.
Our Child.
“One thing you don’t have to worry about is doing it alone. I want to be a part of their life. And whatever support you need, I’ll try and help with.”
You nodded before looking back down to your stomach.
Once again, a silence settled over the both of you and it was like he could hear your brain going into overload with information and feelings. But just as he was about to call your name, you looked up.
Tears were being held tight behind your eyes, but a few words and they were ready to fall free.
“I’m…I’m scared, Aaron.”
It didn’t take him a second thought before he stood up and met you where you were sitting. As he got around his desk, you stood and he embraced you tightly.
He swallowed thickly, nodding and placing a quick kiss to your hair. “It’ll be okay.”
A week later, the team had taken notice of the change between yourself and Hotch. It was no longer cold, but it wasn’t what it was. It was something…uneasy. You had both clearly had a tough talk and were on rocky shores, but you were both finding a way to make it work.
It was also a week later that you had made your decision.
You were going to have a baby.
A lot of different scenarios passed through your mind when you thought about what you were going to do. It would be hard, of course. It would be difficult to work the cases you do and not feel a little more emotionally involved. But you also couldn’t help but think that maybe this was a blessing in disguise.
A part of you had wanted children for a long time, but the thought of actually having them was slipping further and further away the more you worked.
And, despite you feeling selfish, you wanted a baby. You wanted to see a child, your child, grow up and have a life of their own. You wanted to make the memories you had as a kid, but with them.
You knew it would be difficult to do so when you joined the Academy, but part of you always wanted a home filled with the sound of laughter and joy.
And maybe this was your only chance.
And in all honesty, Aaron had similar feelings.
It would be hard, sure. But he also wanted this in his life. He wanted a child. He wanted you in his life, however that would be.
Of course, neither of you had seen this coming when you had run into each other at the Inn you had found. A halfway stop to your actual destination. Only, rather than continuing on your separate journeys for your week’s vacation time, you both found yourselves unable to leave the small town and the safe walls of the local Inn.
It was that part of the story the team would forever speculate on once they found out you were pregnant and it was, in fact, Hotch’s baby.
That was a piece of information they clued together themselves when Hotch called them in for an early meeting, but had confirmation on just a few moments later.
“So, what’s happening here?”
“Are you together?”
“We’re…still figuring that out.” Hotch answered, looking at you.
Neither of you had exactly had the conversation over what you were. Were you a couple? Were you friends? Were you co-workers? Were you just co-workers having a baby together?
HR weren’t exactly happy about the get-together but so long as the relationship wasn’t going to break any codes of conduct within the field, you were both still free to keep working. And more importantly, working together.
However, over the next nine months, certain things seemed to blur.
Aaron came with you to every doctor’s appointment, never missing one. When you had both first heard your baby’s heartbeat, you had clutched onto his hand and not let go. And when the sound got clearer, he pulled you a little closer, rubbing your arm and kissing your hand.
It was a little odd, feeling the baby kick for the first time whilst being stood outside of a crime scene.
Morgan had been with you at the time, quickly calling for Hotch when your posture and face changed from quizzical to concerned. Only, by the time Aaron had reached you both, you laughed and told them what was happening.
Morgan then called JJ over as you guided Aaron’s hand to your stomach. And you both shared an intimate moment, just looking at one another, feeling your unborn baby kick at your stomach for the first time.
JJ was able to confirm what was going on and both herself and Morgan congratulated you before you all remembered where you were and got back to work.
The cold glares you had given Hotch in the weeks leading up to you finding out had disappeared completely after the hug you shared in his office when you told him. And by the time you were entering your second trimester, they had turned into something similar to what they were before everything had changed.
You had both become friends.
He had also relaxed a little more around you, which allowed him space to take in what was actually happening. So, when your cravings started kicking in, he would hand you snacks throughout the days. You wouldn’t even know what you wanted at the time and he just…seemed to know.
And at some point between him attending doctors appointments, helping you with your pregnancy cravings and reading to your belly, you had both begun to live together.
It made sense, at least for the first couple of weeks after the birth and partly during the pregnancy. If you went into labour, it would be safer if someone was with you. And, it meant he was there when, in the middle of the night, you woke up with braxton hicks and panicked a little before getting checked out at the hospital, just in case.
Also, small touches began.
From you holding his hand against your stomach when your baby kicked, to his fingers tracing yours whilst they held that position. Then, in break rooms. They were quick, but light kisses would be pressed to your head or cheek whenever he handed you something. He was always close to you, barely leaving your side when in the field. His hand, always at the small of your back when leading you somewhere. And in the early hours of the morning, his arms would be across you as you both lay in bed, holding you close against his chest.
Until, finally, one night whilst lay in bed, you asked a question.
Both facing each other, despite your eyes being closed, Aaron traced repeated patterns from pushing your hair back to trailing his fingers down your arm to find your hand, rubbing soft circles with his thumb.
Both of you should be fast asleep, yet you weren’t.
“Aaron?”
“Hmm?”
“What are we doing?”
“Sleeping.”
You laughed a little. “No we’re not.”
“I’m sleep talking.”
“Aaron, I’m being serious.”
With a small laugh, Aaron sighed. “Okay, what is it?”
He finally opened his eyes and so did you.
“What are we doing? About us, I mean. We’re having a baby together, but we’re not together together. We work together, but we also live together. What happens after the first couple of months? Do we…what do we do?”
“I suppose we just have to take each day as it comes and see what happens.”
“I can live with that.”
“Or…”
“Oh, no.”
Aaron laughed a little and shook his head, bringing his hand back to your face and brushing the hair from it.
“Or,” he repeated, “we treat this for what it really is.”
“I don’t…” you shook your head.
“I know I don’t regret what happened that week away. Even more so now, but before…before we both found out. I still didn’t regret it. I don’t. We say we live together out of convenience, but I know, at least for me, it’s something more. Now, if for you it’s still out of convenience and bonding for our child, then we can have this conversation when the time comes. But, you should know my feelings for you run deeper than just you being my co-worker and the mother of our child. Do you…could you see yourself…feeling the same?”
The silence that came over both of you for a moment made Aaron worry. Maybe he had gotten it wrong in his head. Maybe you didn’t feel the same. Maybe you were just caught up in the emotions of carrying his child and, since you were in it together, some form of feelings, similar to that of his, were getting blurry.
But then you blinked.
And a light smile graced across your face.
“I do.”
Your voice was barely above a whisper. But still, your words echoed louder and louder around his head.
“You…you do?”
You nodded. “I do.”
Aaron took a moment, before leaning in and pressing a kiss to your lips. It was like your first, all over again. Except, this time, rather than a little fear being behind it, considering at the time you were both still co-workers just on vacation, there was nothing but…
Relief.
More specifically, relief for love.
For months you’d both been avoiding the biggest barrier between both of you. Too scared and too fearful that the answer to each question would be some variant of “No.”
And now…
Finally the answer was yes.
Yes to love.
Together.
Yes to a life.
Together.
Yes to a family.
Together.
#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x fe!reader#hotch x reader#hotch x fe!reader#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch#hotch#hotchner#hotchner x reader#bau fluff#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#bau reader#happy ending#dad hotch#david rossi#platonic bau#unrequited to requited feelings#emily prentiss#jennifer jareau#penelope garcia#derek morgan#spencer reid#fluff#angst#falling in love#kissing#bau team#criminal minds fanfiction
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First Name Basis
Summary: Aaron Hotchner x Fe!Reader -> You and Hotch have never been on First Name Basis, but as the years go on, thing begin to change.
Disclaimer: Mentions and descriptions of blood, bombs, life being in danger, slight spoilers for S4-Ep3 (Minimal Loss - Reader takes Emily's place) (But that isn't the whole fic). BAU found-family fluff, romantic fluff, soft fluff, happy ending. Not Proof Read.
You were on a first name basis with everyone. Everyone save from Hotch.
Of course, he would introduce you with your first name when it came to meeting police departments or official personnel but to anyone else, specifically yourself, he always used your last name.
And you did the same with him. Like the rest of them.
It was always “Sir,” or “Hotch,”.
Never Aaron.
However, this all changed after a case in Colorado.
Yourself and Reid had gone undercover as Child Protection Agents. And it wasn’t long until things went wrong. An unknown police raid meant everyone was taken underground. And a media segment revealed that someone was FBI.
Between yourself and Spencer, you took the rapt. You weren’t willing to watch him get shot and die.
On the other side of the planted bug, the team could hear everything.
And it was killing Hotch.
And Rossi could see it.
They all could.
His own mind was fighting against listening because he had to, and not because you were being beaten.
A small grunt left you as you were thrown into something, and then a crash came. A mirror most likely. More grunts and one scream before…nothing.
It was the first time in a long time his emotions had started pushing to the surface.
Every day, he had to become an emotionless yet empathetic profiler. But at that moment…he didn’t know what he was. He was a profiler, a friend, a…he didn’t know what he was.
“Y/n…”
His voice was barely audible. A hair above a whisper.
But Rossi saw it.
Even if Aaron didn’t know it yet, Rossi knew.
Then you spoke.
“I can take it.”
There were more sounds of fighting before another.
“I can take it.”
“She’s antagonising him!” Derek shouted.
“No, she’s not.”
“She’s talking to us.” Hotch told them both. “She’s telling us not to come in.”
And he didn’t.
It was killing him not to do so, but he didn’t.
But the moment he got a chance, writing the time of “3 am” on the takeaway box, he wouldn’t be turning back.
When he finally saw you, a wave of relief washed over him. And the same happened for you, too.
Once you both caught clear sight of one another, you ran towards him.
He could see the dried blood on your face, partly washed away. And your eye was bruised. And your arms were cut up, most likely from the mirror that had broken.
But you were alive.
Finally reaching him, you hugged him. And he hugged you.
“Are you okay?”
You nodded, “I will be. Where’s Morgan and Reid?”
“They’re inside-”
The place blew up.
Hotch covered you a little, both of you feeling the aftershock of the bomb. The hand you kept on his shoulder pulled him down a little with you. But after you made sure the other was alive, you both turned back to the building. And you started walking closer to it.
“Morgan! Reid!”
They stood up.
“Oh, thank god.”
Making your way up the stairs, you met a coughing Morgan and Reid before Reid finally stood tall and you hugged him.
After that case, everything seemingly went back to normal.
Until another case came, only a few months later.
A bomb had been planted in a building. And, when tracking the Unsub into another one, yourself and Hotch had found yourselves stuck.
The Unsub held a trigger, and by the looks of it, he was wearing one.
But you couldn’t shake the gnawing feeling in your stomach.
Something wasn’t right.
“So, what happens next? You blow yourself up? What happened to “getting all the glory”? That’s what you said, isn’t it? In your message. It was all about the glory.”
Yourself and Hotch took another step forward, but then he unzipped his jacket.
“Another step and I take my finger off the trigger.” He warned.
Neither of you moved, but your gaze did switch.
The bomb the Unsub was wearing wasn’t one you recognised. It wasn’t his type.
By the time SWAT and Bomb Disposal met you at the top of the building, it wasn’t long before he just…gave up.
“He took hostages from the last site.”
“But we found them all.”
Hotch nodded in agreement. “I still want to do a sweep just in case.”
“I’ll come with you.”
By the time you both reached the fourth floor, you still couldn’t shake the feeling.
And just as Hotch reached a small storage unit, it clicked.
“It was a fake.”
“What?”
“The bomb, around his chest. It’s a fake.”
“Why fake a bomb and then give yourself up?”
Then it clicked with the both of you.
“How many agents are in this building?”
“Enough to keep this case in the news for the next fifty years.”
“We need to clear the building now.”
By the time you both reached the floor, calling for every agent to clear the building, someone came and found Hotch.
“We found his briefcase. You’re gonna want to see this.”
Walking over, both yourself and Aaron peered inside. There were plans, memos, and enough cash to give him a whole new life in any country he could possibly want.
“Get all of this processed as soon as you can.”
And Hotch walked away.
But you stayed.
However, the longer you stayed, the bigger that gnawing feeling in your stomach grew again.
And once you finally lifted a pile of cash, you saw it.
A watch with a timer.
“Morgan! Clear the area, now!”
People started running but when you did so, Hotch was still in his place.
“Aaron!”
Grabbing his arm on your way past, you both started running. And whether it was luck, or fate or…whatever it was. Yourself and Aaron managed to clear the site fast enough so as to not die from the explosion.
You both were propelled forward, and landed, rolling onto the ground. And for a few moments, were stunned from the blast.
“Are you okay?”
You nodded, managing to catch your breath. “I’m fine. Are you?”
“I think so.”
Once you were able to open your eyes, you sat back on your heels and took a look at Hotch. He was sitting in a similar position to you, except he was bleeding.
You pushed yourself closer to him, “Jesus, Hotch. You’re bleeding.”
Once you touched it, he seemed to feel it and tried to move his head away from your hand, but you pulled him back.
“Don’t move.”
Through your wire, you called for a medic.
“Y/l/n, I’m fine.”
“Hotch, you’re bleeding. You’re not fine.”
“So are you.”
You shook your head and turned away for a moment, pulling out your pocket knife and cutting the torn piece of your t-shirt.
“Wait.”
Hotch took the cloth from your hands before tearing it into two and handing you a piece back, but keeping one for himself.
Just as you pressed the cloth to his head, he did the same for your cut. There wasn’t much blood coming from your head, so once he knew that had slowed at least, he dabbed at the wound on your arm before tying the piece tight around your arm.
Once the medics finally reached you both, you told them what injuries Hotch had and might have.
“Check her over, too. She’s got a cut on her head. She could have a concussion.”
“I don’t have a concussion.”
The medic had helped you up from the floor and when they did so, you felt a little dizzy.
Hotch didn’t even have to say anything.
“Shut up.”
Thankfully, the next time either of you talked on a first name basis was when on a short vacation.
Considering the fact that no-one of the team was due to go on holiday or drive out of state for at least three more days, Penelope Garcia took it upon herself to plan a small getaway for the entire team that meant even if they got called back (as you all usually would), you would have, at least, a break away.
So, on a random Friday morning, you all drove to the beach.
And it was fun, to say the least.
By the time you arrived, you parked next to Will’s car. Both himself and JJ were getting Henry ready along with the beach bags and diaper bags. From what you could tell, everyone else was already on the beach.
“Need some help?”
JJ nodded. “That would be great.”
“Hi, Henry. Is this his first trip to the beach?”
JJ smiled and nodded. “It is.”
“We did try and take him a few weeks ago but then he got a fever.” Will told you.
“Well, it’ll all be worth it.”
Will handed you a couple of the bags whilst he carried the rest and JJ carried Henry, along with her beach bag, onto the beach.
The minute you spotted Morgan flirting with a group of women a few feet from the water, you spotted Jack playing in the sand with Emily and Penelope. Spencer was trying to avoid the sun and Hotch was finishing setting up the area with a couple of windbreakers and chairs, with Rossi.
And once you, JJ and Will arrived; the two dads continued setting up with the addition of sun parasols.
It wasn’t long before Jack had come running up to get his dad and yourself to join him. JJ handed you Henry for a moment whilst she dug through the diaper bag to find the fruit pouches she had brought with her.
From behind you, Aaron set up another parasol giving both yourself and Henry shade.
“I’ve put Henry’s fruit pouches in the cooler. Ready to go?”
Lifting her son from your arms, JJ carried Henry down to the water whilst Will grabbed his camera. And yourself and Aaron joined Jack, Emily and Penelope.
By the end of the day, you had all swam in the water, built sandcastles, sunbathed, read and even been chased by Morgan when he realised yourself. Reid and Hotch had been hustling him in a game of football.
And at some point after all of that, you must have fallen asleep because you woke up to someone lightly shaking your shoulder.
“Y/n, hey, y/n…”
As you slowly came around, you realised it was Hotch.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, everything is fine.”
It was odd.
His voice was soft. It was rare, if slightly unbelievable, that Hotch showed this side of him. The one he had for Jack. The one he had for those he held close to his heart.
“The others went for some food, they should be back soon. Garcia said she knew your order. Pizza with fries and a side of pickles.”
“That’s my girl.” You said with a sleepy smile.
“Pickles? With Pizza? Really?”
“Hey, don’t knock it till you try it.”
Then he laughed. “Okay, I won’t.”
You smiled at his laughter. And then you thought. In all the years you knew him, you couldn’t think of a time where you had heard him laugh. Sure, you’d seen him smile a little over the years. But before The Beach…you had never heard him laugh.
And it was like music to your ears.
Unknown, at first, but then very quickly became your favourite song.
By the time the others got back, Jack was excited you were awake and ran over to you, jumping towards you and you fell back with him in your arms.
Aaron laughed again, “Jack, let Y/n breathe.”
“Penelope got you pickles.”
“Extra pickles.” She said as she handed you the pizza box and takeaway tub with fries and pickles.
“Have I ever told you you’re a saint?”
“Yes,” she smiled. “But I don’t mind hearing it again.”
“Well you are a Saint, Penelope Garcia.”
“She has to be, for buying you pickles with pizza.” Morgan added.
The rest of the evening passed with stories, smiles and even more laughter.
It was also after that day you noticed when Hotch called you by your name. It hadn’t clicked with you right away, when he woke you up. But when you fell asleep in the round table room after more than 30 hours of work, you noticed it more.
Usually, whenever you fell asleep when case hours ran over, you would be jolted awake by someone (typically Hotch) calling your last name.
But since The Beach, you were woken up with a soft touch to your arm, shaking you lightly, before he said your first name.
“Go home, get some rest.”
“No, it’s fine.”
“No, it’s not.”
You grumbled, sitting up. “By the time I get home, I’ll be on my way back.”
Hotch sighed. “Fine. But you can use the sofa in my office. It’s better than your desk.”
“Thanks, Hotch.”
However, a few months later, something else changed.
A case had been brought into the roundtable room, and everyone was there. Except for you.
“Not like Y/l/n to be late.” Rossi said, pulling out his chair.
“Try her again.” Hotch told Garcia.
“Yes, Sir.”
“Maybe she’s just catching up on sleep.” JJ offered.
“Why would she be catching up on sleep? We all landed back here two nights ago.”
“Is she dating?” Morgan asked.
Hotch looked up.
“No, but her neighbours are.” JJ told them.
“Ooh, that’s gotta be tough.” Prentiss said. “Back in college, I had a roommate the same. Many sleepless nights. That was when I bought my first pair of noise cancelling headphones.”
Garcia called you three more times.
“We’ll continue with the case,” Hotch told everyone. “We can catch her up when she wakes up.”
Except two hours later, you still hadn’t picked up.
And then Hotch got a phone call.
“Is everything okay?”
“I’m going to find Y/n,” Hotch told Rossi as he passed him.
“Do you know where she is?”
“A good idea.”
“I’ll come with you.”
After thirty minutes, and eventually passing the turn for your apartment complex, Rossi spoke up.
“Her apartment-”
“I know, but she won’t be there.”
“Then where is she?”
“She has a second home.”
Rossi didn’t say anything but he couldn’t help but notice that Aaron knew the way, without having to put anything into the GPS.
“Are you going to tell me what happened?”
Hotch sighed a little. Part of him didn’t want to, because he didn’t know if you would want anyone to know. But he’d gone this long without telling Rossi.
“There was a crash this morning. Don’t worry, she wasn’t hurt. But one of her friends was. They’re okay, too. They’re being kept in the hospital for a few days but were more worried about Y/n’s reaction.”
“How did she react?”
“She didn’t.”
“Well, that’s not good.”
Pulling up outside of your home, Aaron stepped out and rushed towards the door, finding the spare key and letting himself in. The doorbell camera would have let you know they were there.
And then he called your name.
Rossi took in the structure and the decoration of your home. He didn’t know you owned a property outside of your apartment, but by the looks of it, you spent more time outside of work here than you did at your apartment.
There were photos of yourself with your friends, as well as the team. It was tidy, and the place smelt of blueberries and cinnamon.
Turning around the bottom of the stairs, Aaron took them two at a time before reaching the top and when he did, Rossi could see him standing on the landing, as well as stall when you called back.
“Aaron?”
Coming from out of your room, you walked down the hall and Rossi watched as Aaron’s demeanour changed. In the car, he had been tense. In fact, he had been tense since you hadn’t walked into the office.
But standing at the top of the stairs, hearing your voice as well as seeing you, he relaxed.
And his voice became softer.
“Hey,”
You walked towards him and he hugged you instantly.
“How did you find me?”
“The hospital called. The nurse said Abby was worried about you. Are you okay?”
Aaron moved back a little to examine your face. You had been crying. Your eyes were a little puffy and your cheeks were tear-stained.
With his thumb, he wiped away the streaks and you melted into his touch for a second.
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Are you?”
You nodded, “I just…it scared me, you know?”
Aaron nodded. “What do you need?”
“A hug?”
A light smile graced his lips for a moment. “I can do that.”
And he embraced you, tightly. Securely.
Rossi smiled for a moment before quietly walking away to snoop through your house. And by the time you both walked downstairs, you hand in Aaron’s, Rossi was in the kitchen.
“Next time Penelope tries to arrange a dinner party, we’re holding it here.”
“So long as you cook.”
“But I don’t see any-”
You and Aaron gave each other a knowing look before you moved and opened up two cabinet doors. It contained three different spice racks, a selection of dry herbs and all standard ingredients to make any one of Rossi’s signature sauces.
He’d given you enough recipes over the years (not that you didn’t have to work to get them – there had been so many coffee runs) that you made sure you always had the main ingredients needed, and you could always pick up fresh ones on your way home.
“You’re not the best snooper.”
“I’m a profiler. Not a detective.”
“You’re still an FBI Agent.” Aaron added, backing you up.
“So, sue me.”
After that case, nothing else changed.
Both yourself and Aaron remained on a first name basis. Especially considering that two years later, you and Aaron started to share the same last name.
#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x fe!reader#aaron hotch#hotch#hotchner#aaron hotch x reader#hotch x reader#agent hotchner#bau#criminal minds#bau reader#bau x reader#found family#david rossi#penelope garcia#derek morgan#emily prentiss#jennifer jareau#bau family fluff#dad hotch#hotch x fe!reader#criminal minds x reader#last name to first name#happy ending#season four criminal minds#season four episode three
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Tough Day
Summary: Aaron Hotchner x Fe!Reader -> You and Aaron have known each other a long time, and in that time you have looked after him. Now it's his turn to look after you.
Disclaimer: I'm on a CM re-watch and wanted to write something for Hotch. Mentions of being injured in a case, bullet wounds, blood. Moments of fluff. Not proof read.
You and Aaron had known each other…a long time. You hadn’t been in the academy together or anything, but you had just…known each other. It started out that you just so happened to live down the street from him. Or, so you both found out when you seemed to run into each other for a few weeks, recognising each other’s faces but never quite plucking up the courage to ask where you knew each other from.
Turned out, it was from work.
Despite Aaron working as Unit Chief of the BAU, you worked just a few floors above him as a part of the Organised Crime Unit.
Every day, you’d both get in around the same time, ride the same elevator and do the same when going home.
Eventually, it led to a conversation. About the local grocery store which had shut down early for the night. You and Aaron had both seen each other in the aisle of that same grocery store after work a couple times a week. And considering you knew the owner, you gave him a word of warning.
After that…conversations became casual.
Then you worked on a case together.
The only member of the team you had met, properly, before was JJ. You both talked about the cases your teams could take on. You had the privilege of conversing with Penelope Garcia a few times but despite working in the same building, you never seemed to run into her.
It was JJ’s assurance that she was real that made you believe so.
And it was after that case yourself and Hotch made a sort of friendship. From working, to riding the elevator to going home.
When the power went down on your block, Hotch was the first person to knock on your door to make sure you were okay. Yet, despite him being the profiler, you could read his underlying fear a mile away.
He had paperwork, cases, people – all that needed to be looked after.
So you helped him.
You helped him with the paperwork, mostly. But the way he talked about the cases had you wishing you’d thought twice about doing the profiler classes.
He made it seem so interesting. Compared to the speech you were given by your old professor in college, Hotch made behaviour profiling seem like one of the most interesting jobs in the world. Except for the working hours. But you could help with that, slightly.
And over the next couple of years, yours and Aaron’s friendship grew to the point where the whole team knew who you were, and when you couldn’t be found in or around Hotch’s office during his lunch break, something was up.
Everyday, you brought him lunch.
You had a habit of making too much food the night before, meaning it either got left in your freezer until past its frozen date or you got sick of it, you either had to find someone to give it to or simply throw it out.
And considering you knew Aaron spent most of his lunch break working. It gave you the perfect excuse to visit him, make sure he was okay, and take a break from your work whilst also making sure he took a break from his.
You did a lot of things like that, Aaron noticed.
How you made sure the people around you were looked after. To you, it didn’t seem like such a big deal. So? You made a little extra, so what?
But he also noticed the way you made sure everyone around you was okay. If they needed a break from work, you’d get them a coffee from the machine and tell them to do so. To talk, walk, or go and read a book for fifteen minutes.
You kept your hands over Penelope’s eyes on difficult cases.
You knew, just from a text alone, that it was a difficult case for Hotch. So, it was never a surprise when, on those occasions, you could be seen in the back of a video call with Penelope discussing a case.
Hotch didn’t know it right away, but after he stepped foot inside your home, seeing the way the blankets were folded on the plane let him know not only had they been washed – they smelled like you, in a comforting way – but you had folded them and placed them in the best places to sleep.
He also spotted other, slightly smaller gestures you made to his team, and your own.
Like the way you made sure certain members of your team, if they had a temporary fear after a particularly harrowing case, could sit where they would best be comfortable. Your eyes were always scanning a room and the minute something seemed to be wrong, it was like a sixth sense and you shot up out of your chair and moved in between the thing that was bothering whoever needed protecting.
You’d put yourself on the firing line so many times, and each time it was as if nothing had ever happened. Of course, it shook you. It would shake anyone. However, whenever someone asked if you were okay, you would answer the same. “Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” or “I’m good. Why?”.
To everyone else, despite how weird it was for them to hear those words – that you were okay – after such incidents, confused them. But eventually…it became accepted. No-one saw anything wrong with your reaction. They never followed up on the question. Every evaluator signed you off into field work pretty quickly, mostly down to your response.
It was almost like a knee jerk reaction.
However, by having the Unit Chief profiler as your friend, that meant eventually your knee jerk reaction was made to a brick wall.
“If there is ever a day where you’re not, please come to me.”
“I’ll be fine, Aaron. I promise.”
Aaron took you by the arm lightly. “I mean it. The other’s might accept it – and I will, for now. But, if there is ever a day…please come to me.”
“You don’t have to worry about me, Hotch. I can take care of myself.”
“You’re busy enough taking care of everybody else.”
You smiled at him. “I promise you. I’m okay.”
And you were, for a while.
It was late in the evening. Far past office hours for Hotch to still be working. Except, he still was. Until something shifted. He didn’t know what, and he didn’t know why. But something shifted.
And when he turned his gaze to outside his office, down to the dimly-lit bullpen, he saw it.
He hadn’t seen you for a while. You’d make up small but forgivable excuses about lunch. If he saw you in the grocery store, you were just leaving as he was arriving. In the morning’s you were either in your office an hour early, or an hour late.
On the late nights and early, early mornings Hotch would arrive home from a case, he saw your lights were still on inside your home. For a while, he thought you had just fallen asleep down stairs. Until he saw small movements from behind the curtains. You were still awake.
One afternoon, Hotch had texted you. “Are you okay?”
But your reply was…happy.
It was easy to hide behind a text message that didn’t require a facial expression to prove otherwise.
So, out of hours, he asked Garcia to check on your file. You wouldn’t tell him yourself and a conversation with both JJ and one of your teammates had explained to him what had happened, it a roundabout way.
From over Garcia’s shoulders, Hotch quickly read the case report.
You’d been injured. Badly. You had insisted you were fine, but when the paramedic checked you over, you were taken straight to the hospital.
From there, the doctors performed a surgery to ensure all pieces of the bullets were removed from your body.
Your evaluation later meant you were out of the field for a while, however could still consult on certain cases from the office.
It also said in your file that you had been transferred…from organised crime to violent crimes. Six months prior to your accident. Which meant you had been working on his floor for six months, undetected.
It also meant you had been avoiding him…more.
Until the moment when Hotch saw you, because you wanted him to see you.
Stepping out of his office, the closer he got towards you, made you slow your own steps down.
For a few moments, it was silent. Not a word was passed between either of you. You looked…tired. Exhausted, even. Your skin was a little duller around your cheeks rather than brighter and happier from your smiles. Your usually polished nails were bitten. The skin around the tips were slightly redder than usual.
And your eyes.
Your eyes spoke a thousand words your mouth could not.
“I-I don’t know what to do.” Your voice broke as you spoke, looking at Aaron with a slight shrug. It was taking everything you had left in you to come to him. You didn’t know what for or what he could do, but you just…felt you had to.
He was the one you trusted the most.
You felt tears prick your eyes but just before the first tear fell, Aaron was striding towards you before wrapping you in his arms, with one hand cradling the back of your head.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to do anything.”
Hotch felt your arms come up to his back, hugging him. All the while, your tears soaked into his shirt.
He had an idea of the amount of strength it took for you to come to him.
You had always been so stable. So constant. Sometimes he even wondered if you were human. But this was more than enough proof.
That same night, Hotch drove you home.
You hadn’t been sleeping. He knew that much. But by the look of your home, the place you had spent most of your time was your living room. Everywhere was tidy, except your bedroom. That was too tidy. It looked like it hadn’t been slept in, in months. Dust was gathering on top of your book on your bedside table. There were no creases, at all on your bed.
He waited for you to take a shower and by the time you got out, towel drying your hair, your bedroom seemed fresher. And from the kitchen you could smell pasta and sauce.
Aaron was cooking.
You had spent most of your life looking out for the people who surrounded you. But now, he was going to look after you.
And he did.
That night, he stayed by your side. You had fallen asleep to the sounds of Gene Kelly laughing at whatever Donald O’Connor was singing as he stood up on a piano. And Hotch stayed by your side the entire night.
He knew you hadn’t been sleeping. Something you confirmed after your tears had run, almost, dry back at the office.
Part of him was worried if he made a single movement, you’d wake up and not get back to sleep. And he didn’t want that. But another part of him wanted to stay because he knew it was what you would do, if the shoe was on the other foot. You deserved to have that. To have someone to stay with you. Stay for you. Because they wanted to.
And he wanted to.
He wanted to make sure you were okay. That you could relax when you woke up and not panic.
But it didn’t just stop there.
Hotch would find ways to help you, too. Just like you had with him. He came to you every lunch break to check in on you. And when he couldn’t, he made sure Garcia did.
When a couple of your cases overlapped, he made sure to stay by your side. You could put up a front for everyone else, but not for him. That wasn’t how your friendship worked. If he had to be honest with you, you had to be honest with him. No matter how much it would hurt.
Whenever you’d go over a case together, and Hotch would spot your hand shaking, his own found yours.
Taking yours in a firm grip, he stood just a little bit closer to you allowing you to lean on him.
When you felt like you needed some space from…everything, Hotch made sure a seat was left for you in a corner where you could see everyone and everything without having to come into much contact with people.
And when you needed to sleep after a case, he was there to lend a shoulder for you to lean on.
They were smaller gestures, but they meant a whole lot to you nonetheless.
But Hotch’s worst fear for you came true when on a case in Ohio.
You were alone with an unsub, in a situation not unlike the one you had been in that had led you to be honest with him in the bullpen that evening.
Your phone had gone dead whilst mid-conversation with him over what you could see in the house you were investigating whilst Morgan had just stepped into the second living room which somehow shut him out of the rest of the house.
Hotch and the rest of the team rushed to your location as soon as possible and all he could hope was that you would be safe enough until he got there.
Only when they finally pulled up outside of the home, Hotch’s vehicle was one of the last to arrive. This meant he was Morgan coming out of the house with the unsub in cuffs, but it also meant he saw you.
And it felt like everything slowed down.
You seemed a little off in your own world before you spotted him and when you did, you paused before running towards him, throwing your arms over his shoulders, repeating the words; “I’m okay. I’m fine. I promise I’m okay.” to him.
Maybe it was the truth, or rather, part of it. But it was also in an attempt to convince yourself that you were.
Aaron pulled back for a moment before checking you over.
“You’re bleeding.”
“I’m fine.”
“You’re bleeding.” He repeated, touching his thumb softly to your head.
“I’m okay.”
“We’re getting you looked at.”
“Hotch, I’m fine. I promise.”
“Bullshit. You’re bleeding.”
“I’m fine-”
“You’re not fine. You’re-”
“Aaron!” You seemed to come back to reality for a moment, before bringing your hand to touch his face and make him look you in the eye. “I’m okay. I-I’ll be okay.”
Aaron nodded after a moment.
“But you’re still seeing a medic.”
#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#hotch x reader#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x fe!reader#aaron hotch x reader#bau#fbi#penelope garcia#jennifer jareau#fluff#sad fluff#hurt to healing#hotch x fe!reader#agents
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just looked at my own fics and sighed.
Together
Summary: Aaron Hotchner x Fe!Reader -> The team knows something is up between yourself and Hotch, except Rossi seems to be the only one to put the pieces together.
Disclaimer: Descriptions of sick. Fluff. Jack and Haley don't exist in this fic. Happy ending. Not Proof Read.
The whole team knew something was up. They just didn’t know what.
Usually, you were normal with everyone. Chatty. Smiley. Professional. Maybe a little blunt every now and again.
But not this time.
For the last week you had been…cold. Well, not with them, at least.
But with Hotch? You had been as cold as ice.
But no-one could pin why.
Even if it had just been small things, like the feeling in the meeting room in the morning when it just seemed to be the two of you, or the small looks you both gave each other – which had started out as awkward, but then quickly turned to shame and clear annoyance, the latter being much more clear on your end. It was definitely clear now.
From the beginning of the case, you had been quick to change subjects. Always staying on the case, which was normal. But not your abruptness to do so. And when Hotch tried to pull you aside as the others made their way to the main doors, you brushed him off.
Hotch was someone you never brushed off. Not until recently.
And when you all landed in Seattle, Hotch was assigning teams for who was driving. But before he could place you with himself, JJ and Morgan, you pushed past him.
“I’m going with Rossi.”
And Hotch didn’t say a word.
Instead, he watched you walk away with your go bag, throwing it into the trunk with Dave. He gave his orders to Prentiss on what would happen and she updated you in the car.
However, forty five minutes into a ninety minute drive, Emily’s voice started to make you feel dizzy. Then the heat in the car felt like it was blasting. So you rolled down the window. But that didn’t help.
“Garcia said she’s already sent over some case files- Hey, you okay?”
From the backseat, Emily leaned forward to get a better look at you.
“I’m fine.”
But five minutes later, you changed your mind.
“Pull over.”
“What?”
“Pull over, I think I’m gonna be sick.”
“Okay, okay. Just hold on.”
The car had barely been put into park by the time you threw the door open, tore your seatbelt away and ran out.
Less than ten feet from the open car door, the last three drinks and meal you ate came straight back up and soaked into the dry grass.
You heard a second car pull up behind and then heard Morgan and Hotch’s voice. Dave had already reached you, placing a hand on your back before pulling your hair back.
“Okay, take it easy. Are you okay?”
You could only hum before throwing up once more. He rubbed circles on your back for a moment before you finally finished throwing up and wiped your mouth with the back of your hand.
“Is she okay? Y/n, are you-”
“I’m fine!” You called out, a little harsher than you had intended.
Holding out a hand, Rossi signalled for Hotch to stop and stay where he was with the others.
“She’s okay, she just needs a minute. Emily, do we have water in the car?”
“Yep, here.”
Making her way over, Emily poured some water onto a tissue before handing it to you. You wiped down your mouth and your hand before being handed the bottle by Dave.
“Small sips, okay? Are you sure you’re okay?”
You nodded, your back still to the rest of the team. “I just need a minute.”
“Aaron, we’ll meet you there.”
It took him a minute before he moved back to the car, but Hotch eventually nodded, calling out they’d see them at the precinct.
“Do you know what it could be?” Emily asked.
“Probably just some bad sushi.”
Emily nodded before getting back into the car.
“Are you sure that’s all it is?” Rossi asked once she was out of earshot.
And for a moment, you paused.
“Let’s just get going.”
Things only seemed to get worse from there.
You managed to hide it as best as you could from the rest of the team, but every hour you had spent a good ten minutes in the bathroom throwing your guts up.
A couple of officers did question where you had been when they couldn’t find you but hadn’t seen you leave the building. One mention of Aunt Flow and they didn’t ask again.
Your coldness with Hotch didn’t ease, either. It just seemed to become more frigid. And everyone saw it.
By the third day in Seattle, Prentiss and Morgan had questioned you on it in the break room.
“Yeah, what do you have against Hotch all of a sudden? What, one week away from us and you’ve suddenly made an agenda against him?”
“Because I love you, I’m going to ask this only once. Please don’t ask about Hotch.”
Morgan and Prentiss looked between each other, slightly worriedly, but both silently agreed to drop it.
“But you will sort it out?”
You bit the inside of your cheek. “I don’t know.”
A few hours later, you were coming back out of the bathroom when Rossi seemed to jump out at you.
“Jeez. Rossi. Give a girl some warning next time.”
Dave smiled. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”
“Have we caught a break?”
“No, but I need to talk to you.”
“What about?”
“About the fact you’re running to the bathroom every hour to throw up.”
“Like I said, it was probably just some bad food. I’ll be okay.”
Only, as you started walking away, Rossi asked you a question.
“What happened between you and Hotch?”
“Nothing.” You answered, your back still to him.
“Really? Because I wouldn’t call it nothing. I’d call it strange.”
“Rossi, I’ve asked Morgan and Prentiss-”
“I know, and I heard. But, to be frank, I think you’re lying and you’re too scared to tell anyone.”
“Tell anyone what?”
But rather than voice it, Rossi just gave you a look. It took you a moment before you cracked a little.
“Rossi…”
“You don’t have to tell me how or what happened, but I’m asking, just find out the truth. You don’t have to tell anyone. But I think the sooner you do it, the better it will be.”
“We’re in the middle of a case.”
Rossi shrugged, “Morgan and JJ are on their way back. Reid’s got it handled here. We’ll pick up some coffee on the way back as a cover. Let’s just go now.”
You seemed to hesitate, and Rossi could see it.
“Please, for my sanity's sake?”
“Okay.”
Twenty minutes later, you found a pharmacy and picked up a box.
“Can you wait outside the door for me?”
“Of course.”
And he did.
Once you paid for the box, the cashier directed you to a bathroom in the back. Except, long after the two minutes were up, you still hadn’t come out. So, Rossi knocked on the door.
You swung it open and he jumped back a little.
“I can’t look at it.”
“Well, you’re gonna have to at some point.”
“I’ve wiped it down and it’s got a cap but…can you look? I’m too scared.”
Rossi could see the fear in your eyes. Oh, how two little lines could instil so much fear into people who dealt with crime every day.
Handing the package to Rossi, he turned it around and pulled it out of the packet.
“I believe congratulations are in order.”
Turning it around so you could see, you took it back into your grasp as you pushed one hand through your hair.
“Oh, my god.”
“I think you and Hotch need to have a conversation.”
“Please don’t tell anyone.”
Rossi smiled, holding your hand which he could feel shaking. “You have my word.”
Somehow, back in the precinct, you managed to keep your cool. You’d brought back coffee for the team and, despite the fact you caught Hotch watching you from his seat, noticing your shaking hand, you pulled it back and found a spare pen from JJ’s notepad and spun it over and over in your fingers.
Thankfully, due to the “food poisoning”, you had been kept out of the field when it came to finding the unsub. However, this just gave you a very large sense of dread. You watched them all run out of the door, Rossi placing a hand on your arm talking directly to you.
“I’ll look out for him.” He told you before the others could hear him.
“Thank you.”
Possibly carrying Hotch’s child made watching him and the team run out of the door, without you, made that sense of dread practically triple. Especially considering no-one other than Rossi knew the truth, or at least a part of it, about yourself and Aaron.
Thankfully, no-one got hurt and the unsub was apprehended in time before he could hurt anyone else. They all came back with looks of relief and tiredness when you saw them, but there was a barely visible look of confusion and perhaps, hopefulness, on Hotch’s face when your scowl at him didn’t seem so cold.
On the plane ride back, you were quiet. Everyone was, but there was just an air about you that told those paying attention to you that you were in your own world.
Of course, Rossi knew why.
But it was tearing at Hotch why he didn’t.
Pulling back into the office, Penelope greeted you all by the elevator, hugging you all. And handing you some dry crackers and a bottle of water.
“Thanks, Garcia.”
As everyone said their goodnights, you watched as Hotch walked directly through the bullpen and towards his office.
“I think there are a couple of things you and he need to talk about.”
You nodded, with a light smile. “You’re right.”
Rossi kissed you cheek before saying goodnight and saluting you before the elevator doors closed. You did a small one back before turning your gaze back to the dim lights coming from Hotch’s office.
However, first, you ran to the bathroom.
Sitting at his desk, Hotch was halfway finished with the last of his reports when a knock came to his door.
Looking up from his desk, there was a slight look on his face that told you he wasn’t expecting you. And you couldn’t be surprised. You’d barely been able to look him in the eye for the last month and a half, and you’d been nothing but cold and if a little harsh with him for the last couple of weeks.
“Is everything okay?”
“Can we talk?”
Hotch nodded. “Come on in.”
You nodded back, entering, but closing the door behind you. Which made Hotch stand.
“Is everything-”
“I’m pregnant.”
A silence settled over the room that you were expecting, but still shocked you. And every possible emotion, some you couldn’t even name, passed over his face before he was forced to sit down.
“Oh.”
“Can I sit?”
He nodded, quickly signalling for you to do so. And so you did.
“What did…How- When did you find out?”
“Sometime in the last twenty four hours.” You answered which confused Hotch, which you could understand. It was a vague explanation. “It’s all been kind of a blur.”
He nodded, understanding what you meant.
“Does anyone…know?”
You nodded. “Rossi.”
“Dave knows?”
“He seemed to know before I did…kinda.”
“What does that mean?”
“I guess I had a feeling when I got carsick, but denial carried me through.”
“Does anyone else know?”
You shook your head. “No. Oh, and, um, I-I took another test to be sure. H-here.”
With a lot of nerves and a lot of awkward courage, you passed the second test across the desk to Hotch who took it in his hands and looked at it.
Two bright pink lines.
Positive test.
“Just so I’m…clear. You are telling me because I’m…”
“The father?” you questioned. “Yes. There wasn’t anyone before or after you for it to be someone else.”
Hotch nodded. “Okay.”
You both sat in silence for a while, taking in what had just happened.
“I, well, I haven’t been to see a doctor yet so I can’t know for certain but these tests are usually pretty accurate.”
Hotch could only nod.
“You’re free to make any decision you wish,” Hotch assured you. “I’ll support you either way.”
You nodded in a small thank you. “Honestly, I don’t know what I’m going to do. With our line of work, it gives you the handbook over why you shouldn’t have children. But, if I do decide to do this…I’m prepared to do this on my own. If I am going to do it, I’d prefer to have you in their life.”
Your hand absentmindedly touched your stomach and you looked down to it for a moment.
“But, I’m prepared to do it on my own.”
Hotch took in everything you said and nodded. “Like I said, I’ll support any decision you make but if you do decide to have our child…”
Those two words settled over the both of you.
Our Child.
Our Child.
Our Child.
“One thing you don’t have to worry about is doing it alone. I want to be a part of their life. And whatever support you need, I’ll try and help with.”
You nodded before looking back down to your stomach.
Once again, a silence settled over the both of you and it was like he could hear your brain going into overload with information and feelings. But just as he was about to call your name, you looked up.
Tears were being held tight behind your eyes, but a few words and they were ready to fall free.
“I’m…I’m scared, Aaron.”
It didn’t take him a second thought before he stood up and met you where you were sitting. As he got around his desk, you stood and he embraced you tightly.
He swallowed thickly, nodding and placing a quick kiss to your hair. “It’ll be okay.”
A week later, the team had taken notice of the change between yourself and Hotch. It was no longer cold, but it wasn’t what it was. It was something…uneasy. You had both clearly had a tough talk and were on rocky shores, but you were both finding a way to make it work.
It was also a week later that you had made your decision.
You were going to have a baby.
A lot of different scenarios passed through your mind when you thought about what you were going to do. It would be hard, of course. It would be difficult to work the cases you do and not feel a little more emotionally involved. But you also couldn’t help but think that maybe this was a blessing in disguise.
A part of you had wanted children for a long time, but the thought of actually having them was slipping further and further away the more you worked.
And, despite you feeling selfish, you wanted a baby. You wanted to see a child, your child, grow up and have a life of their own. You wanted to make the memories you had as a kid, but with them.
You knew it would be difficult to do so when you joined the Academy, but part of you always wanted a home filled with the sound of laughter and joy.
And maybe this was your only chance.
And in all honesty, Aaron had similar feelings.
It would be hard, sure. But he also wanted this in his life. He wanted a child. He wanted you in his life, however that would be.
Of course, neither of you had seen this coming when you had run into each other at the Inn you had found. A halfway stop to your actual destination. Only, rather than continuing on your separate journeys for your week’s vacation time, you both found yourselves unable to leave the small town and the safe walls of the local Inn.
It was that part of the story the team would forever speculate on once they found out you were pregnant and it was, in fact, Hotch’s baby.
That was a piece of information they clued together themselves when Hotch called them in for an early meeting, but had confirmation on just a few moments later.
“So, what’s happening here?”
“Are you together?”
“We’re…still figuring that out.” Hotch answered, looking at you.
Neither of you had exactly had the conversation over what you were. Were you a couple? Were you friends? Were you co-workers? Were you just co-workers having a baby together?
HR weren’t exactly happy about the get-together but so long as the relationship wasn’t going to break any codes of conduct within the field, you were both still free to keep working. And more importantly, working together.
However, over the next nine months, certain things seemed to blur.
Aaron came with you to every doctor’s appointment, never missing one. When you had both first heard your baby’s heartbeat, you had clutched onto his hand and not let go. And when the sound got clearer, he pulled you a little closer, rubbing your arm and kissing your hand.
It was a little odd, feeling the baby kick for the first time whilst being stood outside of a crime scene.
Morgan had been with you at the time, quickly calling for Hotch when your posture and face changed from quizzical to concerned. Only, by the time Aaron had reached you both, you laughed and told them what was happening.
Morgan then called JJ over as you guided Aaron’s hand to your stomach. And you both shared an intimate moment, just looking at one another, feeling your unborn baby kick at your stomach for the first time.
JJ was able to confirm what was going on and both herself and Morgan congratulated you before you all remembered where you were and got back to work.
The cold glares you had given Hotch in the weeks leading up to you finding out had disappeared completely after the hug you shared in his office when you told him. And by the time you were entering your second trimester, they had turned into something similar to what they were before everything had changed.
You had both become friends.
He had also relaxed a little more around you, which allowed him space to take in what was actually happening. So, when your cravings started kicking in, he would hand you snacks throughout the days. You wouldn’t even know what you wanted at the time and he just…seemed to know.
And at some point between him attending doctors appointments, helping you with your pregnancy cravings and reading to your belly, you had both begun to live together.
It made sense, at least for the first couple of weeks after the birth and partly during the pregnancy. If you went into labour, it would be safer if someone was with you. And, it meant he was there when, in the middle of the night, you woke up with braxton hicks and panicked a little before getting checked out at the hospital, just in case.
Also, small touches began.
From you holding his hand against your stomach when your baby kicked, to his fingers tracing yours whilst they held that position. Then, in break rooms. They were quick, but light kisses would be pressed to your head or cheek whenever he handed you something. He was always close to you, barely leaving your side when in the field. His hand, always at the small of your back when leading you somewhere. And in the early hours of the morning, his arms would be across you as you both lay in bed, holding you close against his chest.
Until, finally, one night whilst lay in bed, you asked a question.
Both facing each other, despite your eyes being closed, Aaron traced repeated patterns from pushing your hair back to trailing his fingers down your arm to find your hand, rubbing soft circles with his thumb.
Both of you should be fast asleep, yet you weren’t.
“Aaron?”
“Hmm?”
“What are we doing?”
“Sleeping.”
You laughed a little. “No we’re not.”
“I’m sleep talking.”
“Aaron, I’m being serious.”
With a small laugh, Aaron sighed. “Okay, what is it?”
He finally opened his eyes and so did you.
“What are we doing? About us, I mean. We’re having a baby together, but we’re not together together. We work together, but we also live together. What happens after the first couple of months? Do we…what do we do?”
“I suppose we just have to take each day as it comes and see what happens.”
“I can live with that.”
“Or…”
“Oh, no.”
Aaron laughed a little and shook his head, bringing his hand back to your face and brushing the hair from it.
“Or,” he repeated, “we treat this for what it really is.”
“I don’t…” you shook your head.
“I know I don’t regret what happened that week away. Even more so now, but before…before we both found out. I still didn’t regret it. I don’t. We say we live together out of convenience, but I know, at least for me, it’s something more. Now, if for you it’s still out of convenience and bonding for our child, then we can have this conversation when the time comes. But, you should know my feelings for you run deeper than just you being my co-worker and the mother of our child. Do you…could you see yourself…feeling the same?”
The silence that came over both of you for a moment made Aaron worry. Maybe he had gotten it wrong in his head. Maybe you didn’t feel the same. Maybe you were just caught up in the emotions of carrying his child and, since you were in it together, some form of feelings, similar to that of his, were getting blurry.
But then you blinked.
And a light smile graced across your face.
“I do.”
Your voice was barely above a whisper. But still, your words echoed louder and louder around his head.
“You…you do?”
You nodded. “I do.”
Aaron took a moment, before leaning in and pressing a kiss to your lips. It was like your first, all over again. Except, this time, rather than a little fear being behind it, considering at the time you were both still co-workers just on vacation, there was nothing but…
Relief.
More specifically, relief for love.
For months you’d both been avoiding the biggest barrier between both of you. Too scared and too fearful that the answer to each question would be some variant of “No.”
And now…
Finally the answer was yes.
Yes to love.
Together.
Yes to a life.
Together.
Yes to a family.
Together.
#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x fe!reader#hotch x reader#hotch x fe!reader#aaron hotch x reader
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