#a very lovely album cover/booklet

[dummerjan]

i just came across ai covers on youtube and people are requesting songs in the comments instead of getting enraged and i am further losing hope in humanity and turning to misanthropy

[pshbites]

LOVE ON AiR 6. ROUND TABLE EP 149: perfect pitch :o

WARNiNGS » profanity, mentions of drinking, jake being a menace, there also might be typos 😢

3.7k words (again imsorry)

episode desc - come and take a seat with us at our round table! todays episode is a little different because while talking we built a lego set that jake got! while building we covered perfect pitch, icks in relationships, and scenarios we got sent by you guys on twitter. so please stay for a while with us and get comfortable, hope you enjoyed your meeting with us at the round table! 

*all four boys are seating at a round table, jake is opening a lego box to get out the packets and instructions. heeseung adjusts the camera. the setting of the room is a lot more casual, there’s polaroids on the wall of them and their friends. the chairs they sit in aren’t normal outdoor chairs but rather look much more comfortable. each mic has something correlating to them. jake has iron man, heeseung has a controller, jay has a tiny chef hat and sunghoon has a penguin. heeseung takes a seat and claps his hands together. from left to right the order they’re sitting in goes jake, jay, sunghoon, heeseung.*

heeseung: okay the camera is good 

jay: what was going on with it? 

heeseung: it kept focusing in and out very weirdly, also i think it was dying so i had to change the battery. *he adjusts his mic so it picks up the sound better*

*sunghoon shuts off his phone and sits up, adjusting his mic and looking to the camera* 

sunghoon: guys i am not an alpha male, i like chappell roan and other non alpha male things and i love lauryn hill 

jake: so convincing *he scoffs-half laugh.* 

sunghoon: no im serious, i gave the album a listen and i loved it so much 

jay: told you 

heeseung: what are we building by the way. *he sits up a little taller to try and see the box. 

jake: i’m not telling you! it’s gonna be a surpriseee *sing-song voice* 

jay: i don’t know if you guys know or not but sunghoon and jake were actually late today 

sunghoon: yeah! getting snacks for you and heeseung! 

heeseung: i’m not gonna get on to them they actually brought us food. 

jay: oh but last time i was late you cut from my paycheck 

jake: bring food next time loser 

*jay flicks jake’s forehead making him groan loudly* 

jay: i’m mistreated guys im taking new friend applications 

heeseung: oh like jake’s girlfriend application? 

*the group laughs, jake looks the camera in all seriousness* 

jake: if this gets 1 million likes i’ll post the google form. 

heeseung: where would you take her out for a first date 

jay: don’t make him say it, we might get demonetized. *jay laughs along with sunghoon and heeseung. jake rolls his eyes and sighs* 

jake: you think so low of me. 

sunghoon: well considering when you [BLEEP] in your last relationship 

jake: woah?!? i told you that in confidence. 

*sunghoon laughs loudly. jay and heeseung look at each other then laugh* 

jake: okay guys it’s not that funny 

heeseung: cannot believe you did that. you begged her? 

jay: according to sunghoons words the [BLEEP] was too good 

jake: GUYSSSS *he groans, putting his head on the table* 

sunghoon: okay okay fine 

*sunghoon heeseung and jay stop laughing in an attempt to calm themselves down* 

heeseung: before we sign in we should recap our weekend right? 

*jay nods, taking a sip of his water and sitting up straighter. jake moves the pile of lego bags in the middle along with the instruction booklets.* 

sunghoon: well mine was chill, ask those two schmucks though. *he points to jay and jake who smile at one another knowing what they did this weekend* 

jake: okay well we went to a music festival and it was so sick. 

jay: no yeah it was so fun, we were at the barricades too! 

*heeseung widens his eyes, intently listening* 

heeseung: barricades?! who was performing. 

jay: it was a lot of underground artists but live music is like always good. it kinda sucked though because we were with yeonjun and his friends and i knew jake was gonna be drunk so i had to drive back home. 

*jake laughs, jay glaring at him.* 

jake: yeah but you had fun, flirted around too didn’t ya. *he playfully hits jays shoulder, making his ears turn red* 

heeseung & sunghoon: OOOOO *sing-song voice* 

jay: barely, BARELY. this girl liked my outfit and we talked for a bit 

jake: ‘a bit’ more like all night. 

heeseung: oooo 1, 2, 3, 4 that guy has rizz galoreeee! 

*once he says that the boys stop what they’re doing to stare at him, jake side eyes sunghoon and all three of them begin laughing at heeseung.* 

sunghoon: what the fuck was that man 

heeseung: *laughs embarrassingly* i don’t know i saw it on my tiktok, i just wanted to try it 

jay: for those of you who say that heeseung gets hoes he in fact does not *still laughing* 

jake: only thing he touches is his controller everyday 

*jay and sunghoon laugh harder, their faces turning red. heeseung tries to hold back his laugh but then starts laughing with them.* 

heeseung: you guys are so mean 

sunghoon: if we can’t humble you who will.  

jay: well spoken hoon. 

jake: no no i think heeseung gets hoes 

heeseung: ehhhh my last relationship was a year ago 

sunghoon: i swore yall broke up a couple months ago 

jay: dude your perception of time is so bad 

jake: yeah it’s been a little more than a year

sunghoon: then i guess heeseung needs that girlfriend application more than you do. *laughs*

heeseung: can we just sign in please 

jake: oookaayy! welcome to another round table meeting, please sit down with us. i’m your host jake for this week and todays activity is legos and snacks! to my far right i have..

sunghoon: sunghoon

heeseung: heeseung

jay: ur mom 

jake: that wasn’t funny. 

heeseung: loser

jay: says the one who said the most embarrassing joke known to man 

*jay sticks his tongue out at heeseung making him flip him off*

jake: anyways, starting off the episode i wanna talk about how fucking convenient it is that heeseung has perfect pitch 

*the boys begin opening the lego bags, pouring it out and each taking their respective instruction booklet, one for each of them.*

heeseung: honestly one day i was just playing the piano and i discovered i had it 

sunghoon: yeah then you started milking the shit out of it 

jay: jake has a point because whenever i need to tune my guitars hee always helps me

heeseung: its good with the ladies too

jake: yeah okay rizz galore 

heeseung: okay enough

sunghoon: mmm i don’t think it’s enough *jay jake and sunghoon laugh at heeseungs face which is a pout* 

jake: it’s so cool though, i’ve never met anyone who has it 

heeseung: i don’t know, i think it would be much more convenient if i was like a singer or something but im not. it’s kind of a pointless talent 

sunghoon: i don’t think so, it gives you personality 

jay: you could’ve been a singer if you wanted to. if you guys don’t know heeseung actually auditioned to be in one of those kpop survival shows 

jake: *gasp* i remember, you told us at lunch that day like it was the biggest thing ever 

heeseung: you guys know the real reason i auditioned?

sunghoon: wait why

heeseung: because [BLEEP] did 

jay: *laughs, throwing his head back then high fiving sunghoon across the table* we figured 

heeseung: you two knew?!

sunghoon: jake did too actually but he thought it was.. you know 

jake: yeah i didn’t know it was her though 

heeseung: well my dreams of being in a kpop group were crushed when they rejected me. it didn’t matter anyways because i wasn’t that excited 

jay: i remember vividly you cried for weeks 

heeseung: is it hate heeseung day?

sunghoon: no, but it can be 

*heeseung shoves sunghoon shoulder making him giggle* 

jake: should i start with my questions? 

jay: yeah go ahead gamemaker 

sunghoon: floors yours 

jake: okay well i only had one question and the rest were scenarios that people sent 

heeseung: agh before you do ill go and grab those snacks that you bought 

jake: okay we can wait it’s fine 

*heeseung gets up, leaving the room, jay jake and sunghoon continue to build, looking at the instructions* 

jake: you know i was thinking the other night we’ve known each other forever 

jay: we really have haven’t we. i mean i have to be honest i never would’ve expected to be like best friends with you guys 

sunghoon: ouch 

jay: not like that. i mean that i never would’ve thought that id actually have people this close to me you know. or like people who understand me this much. 

sunghoon: i understand. i feel the same. i mean i feel like people think im just cold and heartless but you guys understand me for who i am 

jake: you just seem like you are, you aren’t actually hoon. 

sunghoon: it just feels like it sometimes. like i feel like i don’t try to come off as cold but it just happens. 

jay: it’s the ice in your veins 

*all three of them laugh* 

sunghoon: no but really, i just think that you guys understand me so much more than i would’ve imagined 

*heeseung walks back in, eyebrows furrowed at the conversation they’re having. he sets the snacks down on the table and sits down*

heeseung: didn’t expect it to get deep today 

jake: sorry guys 

jay: it’s okay, i like our deep convos 

heeseung: jake? you wanna ask your question? 

jake: oh yeah! *he pulls out his phone to see his layout of todays episode* okay first off, what do you guys think your icks are in relationships. or talking stage or anything really. 

jay: this is a hot take but just being overly rude. 

*heeseung, jake, and sunghoon hum in agreement* 

jay: i think it’s kind of annoying but also just mean. like i understand the occasional joking manner but being mean to people unprompted is so weird. 

sunghoon: i agree, i think it really displays what kind of person you are. like why are you being mean to people you’ve never even met. let alone don’t even know. 

heeseung: i feel like it depends on the situation you know. could be one of those things where she seems rude but in reality she’s not. 

jay: i guess so, but i still just find it weird. i understand being closed off with your emotions but i think just being rude without any reasoning is just mean. 

jake: i understand that. personally an ick for me is someone who has a big ego not in like a funny way but in a way they always have to one up you. it’s like the relationship is a competition almost 

sunghoon: mmm see ive met some people like that, i do feel like there’s some underlying trauma that makes them do that you know. *sunghoon opens the bag of snacks in front of him and takes a chip out, angling the bag towards the others and they dig in.* 

jay: i think what jake is trying to say is that they’re just really full of themselves. like they think they can do any wrong 

sunghoon: that’s just a shitty person to be around. 

heeseung: an ick for me is someone who doesn’t know how to dress 

*heeseung looks to the other boys and they burst out laughing at the change of mood.*

jay: i love how we talked about deep things and heeseungs is so surface level 

heeseung: okay im sorry! i would want my partner to just dress nice it’s not hard to ask 

sunghoon: i don’t think ive ever talked to a girl who didn’t have style

heeseung: me either but there’s people out there

jake: *laughs* okay hee. what about you hoon? 

sunghoon: *he thinks whilst he’s trying to build* maybe insecure people? 

jay: okay that’s a bit of a hot take 

sunghoon: not like that. i understand people have insecurities it’s just annoying because at some point those insecurities will just go onto your shoulders that’s not something i want. i’m not the most confident person but at the same time i am confident in my own skin so i guess i would want someone like that 

heeseung: i get it, sometimes people like that can drag you down with them. it’s entirely too draining 

sunghoon: i just want to have fun in my relationship. like i don’t want it to be too tolling 

jake: but what good is a relationship if you don’t have to work for it? 

sunghoon: you have a point. ugh why can’t you be wrong like always 

*jay laughs, jake rolls his eyes at sunghoon and chuckles a little* 

jake: you’re annoying 

sunghoon: yeah but you love me 

heeseung: awwww a confession 

jake: shut up 

*sunghoon smiles at jake’s cheeks flushing pink*

jay: i’m kind of excited for these scenarios 

jake: oh they are juicy our listeners have exciting lives. the first one is this girl has a boy best friend who is really close with her crush. but it turns out she found out that the boy best friend has a crush on her and so does her crush. she doesn’t know which guy to pick because they’re both equally good to her but she’s starting to like both of them. 

heeseung: oh that’s messy. move cities? 

jay: be serious heeseung 

heeseung: no i would like actually have to move cities if that were to happen. that’s such a difficult choice. 

jay: the question is did she really even like her crush if she’s starting to like her boy best friend? 

sunghoon: ooo you’re right. it’s like they say, you didn’t actually love the first if you fall for the second 

jake: wise words spoken from park sunghoon

sunghoon: i read that on a facebook post 

*the four of them laugh at sunghoons analogy* 

heeseung: i guess just pick whichever one you like more. 

jake: okay just to spin it around for you guys. what if they’re actively fighting over her and it’s ruining their friendship so if she picked one the other wouldn’t talk to either of them again. 

jay: oh that’s hard.. i have to agree with heeseung move cities 

jake: guys come on! real advice! 

jay: ugh fine. 

heeseung: well.. was their friendship really that strong if they’re fighting over a girl of all things. 

sunghoon: oh you’re right. they weren’t ever really friends if a girl came between them. it just proves the friendship was weak at the start so she shouldn’t have to feel that bad about it because they couldn’t have been that close. 

jay: but what if that just reflects that her and the guys future relationship will be just as weak as that friendship. 

jake: hey why’d you twist it! 

jay: sorryy *he smiles at jake and he rolls his eyes, continuing to build* 

heeseung: easy get over them 

jake: that’s not a good answer 

heeseung: okay fine then she should choose herself. she doesn’t need that kind of toxicity in her life 

sunghoon: yeah i agree

jay: same here 

jake: okay next! this guy says “recently my girlfriend told me that she’s questioning her sexuality, i want to be there for her and help her through whatever she is going through but would it be selfish for me to put myself first and break up with her?” *jay and heeseungs eyes widened as jake kept reading the message*

sunghoon: well. i mean it’s clear she doesn’t feel the same way for him anymore so i don’t think he’s wrong to break up with her 

heeseung: is it like he’s scared she’s gonna cheat on him? 

jay: i think it’s just because he knows her heart isn’t in it anymore. which is fine it happens to everyone. 

heeseung: okay, then yeah it’s not wrong to break up. i would say though continue to be her friend if he still wanted to be there for her 

jay: yeah, i agree with that. it’s completely reasonable to break up if it’s already like been made aware that one person doesn’t feel the spark anymore. there’s no point in staying together 

jake: how would you guys feel? if you were the guy. 

sunghoon: i’d be hurt because break ups suck but at the same time i can’t do much. it’s like sorta out of your hands. 

heeseung: yeah, i mean if she’s questioning her sexuality that’s okay but i would have to put myself first and step out of the relationship 

jake: okay okay. so last scenario, “my friend group is drifting apart because two of our friends dated and broke up. one of them cheated but the person who cheated is my closest friend in the whole world. what do i do” 

*heeseung jay and sunghoon all collectively have the same facial expression*

heeseung: the fuck. 

jay: i would seriously be questioning the friendship 

sunghoon: what do you mean

jay: think about it, if someone can be in a relationship claim to love someone then cheat on them what does that say about what kind of friend they are. 

sunghoon: oh.. you’re so right. 

heeseung: wait so these two people who dated were in the same friend group and because of that they’re taking sides? 

jake: yeah, they didn’t clarify but i’m sure that’s what they meant. 

heeseung: what kind of bullshit is that? friends shouldn’t be dragging the other in their relationship. it doesn’t matter if they broke up you shouldn’t have to take sides

jay: i mean it makes a bit of sense, the guy cheated so who would wanna be friends with a cheater

sunghoon: i agree with jay, i would seriously drop that guy even if he was my best friend. it takes an evil spawn of satan to cheat on someone

*jay and jake side eye each other then laugh at sunghoons word choice. heeseung joins in and sunghoon laughs along*

jake: you have such a way with words

sunghoon: it’s like the evilest thing ever dude

jay: hes so real because if i got cheated on i would wonder where the fuck did i find this super villain 

heeseung: imagine cheaters have groupchats and when they’re picking their targets they’re like “tonight we steal ze moon!!” *in gru impression*

*the boys laugh harder, the topic they were talking about now completely lost*

jake: no i think that’s so accurate. i really do think it is like that

sunghoon: i think yeah i would drop the dude

heeseung: i agree 

jay: okay jake what the fuck are we building 

*the separate pieces now finished, the boys look at them in confusion. jake smiles and gestures them to slide it to him. he begins putting it together while the other are snacking. he hides the finished piece behind his back*

jake: okay guess what? 

heeseung: what?

jake: chicken butt!!! *jake pulls out the finished build behind his back and it is indeed a chicken butt* 

*the three of them stare in silence whilst jake laughs, completely losing his mind at the immature joke.* 

jay: is it too late to quit this podcast 

sunghoon: i’m right there with you 

heeseung: we’ve been here for like an hour and a half and you made us build one big gigantic chicken butt?!

jake: perhaps *giggle* 

sunghoon: how did you even find it 

jake: it’s off brand lego. they make them custom it takes months 

jay: you’ve been preparing this for MONTHS?!

jake: yes it’s literally perfect 

heeseung: oh my god 

sunghoon: ugh you’re so annoying 

jake: that’s a compliment. 

*jay looks at the build then starts laughing, heeseung and sunghoon laughing with him.*

jake: told you! 

heeseung: we should put it here in the room somewhere 

sunghoon: oh yeah i agree. 

jay: this was actually fun 

jake: oh wait guys give me a snack review 

heeseung: umm okay. i think the chips were an 8/10 i don’t enjoy honey mustard chips but they were good. and the candies were also like a 7/10 

jake: i hate you okay next 

heeseung: what the fuck-

sunghoon: 0/10 for both because i paid 

jake: that’s just mean

sunghoon: im sorry?? you made me drive you and pay. which by the way am i taking you home 

jake: yeah.. can you please *he smiles at sunghoon*

sunghoon: of course. did you wanna get something to eat 

jake: ughh yeah 

jay: no fair why are you guys going out on a date without us

heeseung: yeah what the hell

jake: well because this is heeseungs house? and its not our fault you're here all the time jay 

sunghoon: i mean we could always just eat here. you okay with that? *sunghoon looks to jake and he nods*

heeseung: let’s just order food then. jay can pay

jay: what the fuck?

jake: not all of us have trust funds 

sunghoon: yeah

jay: i think heeseung should pay because he cut my paycheck

heeseung: you were late! you know the policy you goofball 

*jay starts laughing at heeseungs insult and heeseung laughs with him*

jake: they can’t be serious for two seconds

sunghoon: like you’re any different let’s just split 

jay: yeah okay fine 

jake: okay now rate my snacks jay!

jay: i think they were 10/10 and i love whatever jake gives me. 

jake: this is why you’re my favorite

jay: okay no i hate you

*heeseung and sunghoon laugh at jake’s expression*

jay: you’re weird about the whole girlfriend thing!

jake: hinge is restricting!! 

heeseung: okay just sign out god we can argue some other time 

jake: this is not arguing! this is healthy communicating take notes guys!

jay: false our relationship is nowhere near healthy he’s mean to me. *sunghoon and heeseung laugh some more, making jay laugh with them*

jake: *speaking louder over all of the laughing* okay well thanks for joining us today at round table, please like share and comment on this video and we’ll see you guys next week! bye bye!! 

previous masterlist next

AUTHORS NOTE » got carried away.. as always. this chapter may seem filler ish but i wanted you all to get to know round table and their silly selves a bit better 😕 pls don’t hate them guys

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[toomuchracket]

when i found you, much younger than you are now (flatmate/dad!matty x reader)

ten years of self-titled!! can u believe!! anyway, a little fluffy drabble about the day the album was released, and also about the day it turned ten, as voted for by you guys. enjoy!

2013

when you enter the kitchen, the linoleum floor cold even through your fluffy socks, matty is staring at the fridge. namely, at the thing pinned between two shitty manchester fridge magnets - a futile attempt by you to reduce your shared homesickness when you moved down south.

he's staring at the calendar, which under today's date reads "75 album release day!!!!" in your handwriting, adorned with as many lovehearts and stars and smiley faces as you could fit in the tiny box.

not that either of you were at any risk of forgetting the date, mind, but you thought it would be cute to commemorate it anyway. "you can keep it as a memento in the future," you had said, as you wrestled with the paper and the bumblebee magnet and the laws of physics while putting the calendar up. "when you're living in a malibu beach house in a decade, married to a supermodel, you can look at that calendar and think of the day your first album came out. and maybe also of me, back in london, or manchester, or maybe edinburgh... i don't know where exactly, but most likely on the other side of the world from you and your gorgeous wife. it'll be cute!"

(neither of you thought it was cute whatsoever, though.)

matty turns when he hears your half-shuffling footsteps, face twisting into a sleepy smile that splinters your heart. he opens his arms as you near him, pulling you into a washing powder-scented hug and resting his lips on your hair. "hi, darlin'."

"hi," you murmur into his sweatshirt. "happy album day."

"thanks," you feel matty's cheeks twitch into a smile against your head. "feels quite surreal, honestly. we have an album out. mad."

you caress the space between his shoulder blades. "i can imagine - it's insane for me to even think that my best friend in the world has an album out. m'so proud of you though, babe."

"couldn't have done it without you, sweetheart. oh, that reminds me..."

matty breaks the hug - and, in the process, your heart - to reach for one of the CDs piled haphazardly between the radio and the kettle. he hands you one with an all too familiar cover art, accompanying his "here" with a grin.

"matty, i said i would buy it!" you protest. "i want to be a part of getting you a number one."

"that's cute, babe, but nah," matty folds his arms and smirks. "there wouldn't be an album without you, because there wouldn't be EPs without you and your room at uni. so, the boys and i figured that you were the perfect person to get the first album CD actually made."

your eyes fill with tears at the ridiculously sweet, ridiculously too generous gesture. "wait, really?"

"i mean, it was my idea, of course," matty winks, which earns him a shove on the arm. "but yeah, that's the very first 1975 album disc. open it, darlin', look at the lyric booklet."

sniffling, you do as requested; your sniffles turn to full-blown sobs as you take in the "to our favourite girl. thanks for the love (and the pints) xx" dedication written on the first page, sobs which only increase in volume as you take in the lyrics, handwritten by matty rather than typed.

you gently place the CD and booklet back on the counter, and pull your sweetly-smiling best friend into a teary hug. "thank you, sweetheart. i feel very special."

"you are," matty replies, tenderly stroking the back of your head. "you're the most special, to me."

your heart jolts at that, and you squeeze matty even tighter, pull him even closer to you. but it's not close enough to satisfy you, it never is - nothing short of his skin cells grafting to yours and consuming them would stop your heart and brain and nervous system aching for him.

well, a kiss would probably do it, but that's far less likely to happen.

the painfully tender moment is interrupted by matty's back pocket buzzing, which provides a blissful relief from the thoughts about kissing your best friend that were beginning to awake from their dormancy. alas, the relief is short-lived - matty sighs in your ear, and murmurs "will you get that for me, sweetheart? don't wanna let go of you."

with a hopefully-unnoticeable gulp, you slide your hand down matty's back and into his pocket to pull out his phone. you squint at the caller ID. "s'george."

"should probably speak to him, i s'pose," matty says, planting a final (and devastating) kiss to your head before letting go of you and taking his phone. "are you gonna go and listen to the album while you get ready for the party later?"

you grin sheepishly. "already bought and listened to it on itunes."

"you're incorrigible. but i love you."

"ooh, big word! i love you too," you smile. "and tell george i love him too, and i can't wait to celebrate with you all later."

matty winks. "will do, darlin'."

you wink back and grab your CD, turning on your heel and wandering to your bedroom to begin the arduous process of getting ready for the album release dinner and subsequent party. it goes by quicker than usual, though, soundtracked by the boys, punctuated by congratulatory texts to and from ross and george and a half-hour congratulatory phone call with adam, and powered by the excitement of knowing you can be extra affectionate with matty today and it won't be weird.

it goes by so quickly, in fact, that you're almost completely finished your makeup when matty peers round your slightly-open door. "hey babe, would you mind- oh, wow, you look gorgeous!"

it's almost embarrassing how warm your cheeks get at that simple statement. you swivel to face your flatmate, smiling bashfully. "thanks, sweetheart. i was a bit worried the eye makeup was too much for dinner, but i've committed to it now, i s'pose."

"no, it's perfect," matty says softly, coming into the room and perching on the end of your bed. you're perfect, he wishes he could add - it's cliché, but god, is it true. "i love it."

your cheeks burn, and lift of their own accord. "i'm glad."

matty smiles back just as widely as you. there's a pleasant silence for a moment, reluctantly broken by you before matty forgets his train of thought. "did you want to ask me something, babe?"

"oh, shit, yeah," matty nods. "would you mind - if you have the time, that is - drying my hair for me? can never get it to sit right. but like it's cool if not, i can do it myself, i just like it more when it's you doing it and-"

"matty," you interject, before he talks himself unconscious. "of course i will. just let me do my lipstick first, yeah? then i'm all yours."

all his. christ, what he wouldn't give. "take your time, darlin'. thanks a lot."

"s'no problem," you say, turning back to your dressing table and rifling through a pile of lipsticks. matty smiles as you open a few in turn, furrowing your brow as you wordlessly narrow down your colour options; the smile is wiped clean off his face when you drop your jaw and swipe a dark pink over your lips, forming them into an O as you make sure the lipstick is applied perfectly. fuck. your mouth.

(the lyric from talk! is most definitely about you, but he'll never tell.)

after the most agonising minute of matty's life, you turn around to face him. "ok, i'm finished making myself pretty. your turn, babe."

"you're always pretty," matty says, kissing the top of your head as you stand up to let him sit in the chair; he finger guns towards his reflection as he does. "and so am i."

you roll your eyes. "maybe it's best if the album doesn't go to number one, actually. your head might explode, healy."

"best make sure my hair looks good then, babe."

"when has it not, when i've styled it? it's me you're talking to, not george."

"fair point."

with a wink to him through the mirror, you rake one hand through matty's hair and aim the hairdryer at it with the other. he closes his eyes, sinking back into the plush seat, enjoying the soothing combination of warm air and your gentle touch - your nails lightly scratch his scalp the way you know he loves, and he hums contentedly. fuck the dinner, fuck the party, fuck celebrating the album; matty would be happy just to stay like this forever with you.

you'd be happy with that too, to be honest.

matty slowly opens his eyes as you put down the hairdryer and finish shaping his hair with your hands. you crouch to get the back looking just so, then rest your chin on his shoulder and smile at him through the mirror. "beautiful boy."

tilting his head so it rests on yours, matty beams at you through the mirror. "thanks, sweetheart. we do look quite hot, don't we? we should memorialise it, i think."

"now? we're not even dressed for tonight yet," you say, as matty pulls his phone from his pocket and opens the camera.

"trust me, babe, this is just the first of many pictures i intend to take to document this very important day. and the first of many pictures i intend to take of you, looking all hot and glamorous."

"charmer. alright, take the pic."

"alright, darlin'."

*

2023

when you enter the kitchen, the déja vu of a moment from a decade ago practically smacks you in the face. never mind that it's a different house, with a different kitchen and a different floor (tiled, not lino, but still cold under socked feet).

just as he was exactly ten years ago to the day, albeit with different hair, matty is staring at something pinned between two shitty manchester magnets on the fridge (also different - a smeg you were embarrassingly excited about buying when you and matty moved here). rather than the calendar from before, though, it's the picture the two of you took while you were getting ready to celebrate the album release.

again, matty turns to smile at you as you near him - well, as best he can with a toddler clinging to his leg and a 7 month-old baby in his arms. you can see in his eyes that the déja vu is getting to him as well. that, and the way his smile widens as he says "hi, sweetheart".

"hi. happy ten years of your first album," you grin, moving closer to kiss him quickly. dylan lets go of her dad's leg and raises her arms towards you; when you pick her up and kiss her cheek, she giggles and hides her face in your neck. smiling, you do the same to elena, who beams mostly toothlessly at you in response. "and hello to you too, my babies! were you good for daddy while mummy was at work?"

soft curls tickling your neck tells you that dylan is nodding, an action matty copies enthusiastically. "they were perfect," he says, booping elena on her tiny nose and making her giggle - your favourite sound on the planet. "they take after their mum, of course."

you roll your eyes. "ever the charmer, healy."

"you know it, healy," matty grins, relishing the chance for acknowledgement of your shared last name, the same way he's done at any opportunity since you took it as your own four years ago. "we were just talking about mummy, weren't we, dyl? how in that photo she thought i was going to be married to somebody else by now, but daddy always knew he wouldn't marry anybody but her."

your heart glows with overwhelming love for matty and his words; it quickly begins to burn with embarrassment at your past utter cluelessness, though. "well, i genuinely didn't think you liked me in that way, the way i liked - like - you."

"silly mummy," dylan giggles, playing with the pendant on your necklace that bears her first initial, as well as those of her father and sister.

you tickle her little tummy, and the giggles increase tenfold. "silly mummy indeed!"

your toddler's giggles fade into little hums, and her tiny face turns placidly serious as she looks at the picture of her parents. "but pretty mummy."

"the prettiest," matty agrees, trying his best to extrapolate elena's tiny fist from one of his curls.

"well, maybe in a few hours, once i'm ready for the party," you say, stepping forward to save your husband's hair from his mini-me's grip. it takes you both a minute, considering you're both operating with only one daughter-less limb, but matty's curls escape mostly unscathed from your baby's possessive grasp. elena might be a matty clone, but she really is your daughter, no doubt about it. "which i really should start working on, considering everyone will be here in... three hours. will you all sit with me while i do my makeup?"

"of course we will," matty nods, holding out his free hand for you to take with your own. "lead the way, wifey."

for the second time that day, although you're sure there will be many more instances of it, there's an overwhelming familiarity to the scene in your bedroom. with the exception of dylan sitting on the vanity, copying you and pretending to put her own makeup on with one of your clean blush brushes, and elena doing tummy time on your bed and babbling away happily, the process is much the same as it was exactly a decade ago - enjoyable, quick, interspersed with excitement and texts and calls from your equally-excited friends.

the soundtrack is also different, although it's still matty singing; instead of the songs about, well, drugs and blowjobs that had scored your pampering in the past, he's doing a medley of disney songs, nursery rhymes, and... "babe, is that britney spears?"

mirroring his youngest daughter and lying on his stomach on the bed, matty glances up, eyes gleeful. "yeah! lena loves it. look - oops, i did it again, i played with your heart, got lost in the game, ooh baby baby."

true enough, elena shrieks with laughter and taps her hands against the duvet in accompaniment to her dad's singing. you laugh too, picking dylan up and moving to sit beside the other half of your family. once you're settled, you scoop elena into your arms and sit her against your knees. "you have such good taste, my girl!"

"mmm, so do i," your husband hums, looking at you with barely-concealed attraction in his dark eyes. "you look gorgeous, darling."

over ten years of matty compliments, and they still shoot straight to your knees and turn them wobbly. you lift your burning cheeks in response. "thanks, sweetheart. you're not too bad yourself."

"you think so? because i was going to ask you about fixing my hair again-"

"i honestly don't think it needs it, babe."

"really? well, in that case," matty reaches back to grab his phone from his back pocket, before rolling to a sitting position and tugging dylan into him. "scootch in, then."

dylan watches her dad open the camera app. "photo now?"

"yes, munchkin."

"but my dress!"

"oh, you're your mother's daughter right enough," matty smiles. "we'll take one picture first, dyl, and then you can go and put your dress on in time for your aunties and uncles and cousins arriving, yeah?"

"ok."

"that's the spirit," matty ruffles his toddler's head, before putting his arm around you. "say cheese!"

after his girls oblige, dylan moves round to talk to her baby sister, while matty opens the picture to see how it turned out; you lean in and rest your chin on his shoulder again so that you can look too. "oh, matty, look how cute we all are!"

"definitely fridge-worthy," matty laughs, kissing your temple. he leans back slightly to look at you, bringing a hand up to lightly caress your hair. "i can't believe it's been ten years. for both the album and the two of us. although they always went hand in hand for me, to be honest. constantly thought about you while i wrote it. and i still constantly think about you now."

you press a quick kiss to matty's lips, wiping away your lipstick stain with your thumb - matty tries to kiss it as you do, which earns him a laugh and a "matthew" from you. "i love you, baby."

"i love you too, sweetheart. here's to the next ten years."

[arnaerr]

9 album covers

got tagged by @dirty-bosmer and @lucien-lachance for this tag game! thank you <3 post your 9 favorite album covers. Aesthetics, not necessarily favorite albums.

Irfan - Irfan. They've remastered this album later and made a new cover, but I love how whimsical this old one is.

Herlunar - Vanitas Vanitatvm. Reminds me of vintage book covers.

Masayoshi Takanaka - All of Me. Ngl Masayoshi Takanaka is THE KING of cool album covers. Goals

Paradise Lost - Symbol of Life. It was the first album of them I've heard, and my uncle gave me it as a CD. Love the minimalistic design and the booklet is very cool + it's still my fav album by them.

Dornenreich - Durch Den Traum. This covers looks like a dream and reminds me of Nicholas Roerich's landscapes. The music feels like a dream as well. Probably my fav concept album in terms of the atmosphere.

Paradise Lost - Lost Paradise. Their first album, which means it's very edgy but I like old school sci-fi vibes of the cover.

Masayoshi Takanaka - alone. The king slays again.

The Moors - The Moors. Love the cover a lot, very original, and the album is spectacular as well. Sadly, they didn't release anything besides that. Also, this golden acorn in the senter of the cover drives me insane. WHY. WHAT. augh

Masayoshi Takanaka - Brasilian Skies. I just want to be him.

[luveternals]

paring: 3. simon 'ghost' riley x male reader rating: M, MDNI cw: reader has a very strong photographic memory and doesn't know how to let go, lovers to strangers, ambiguous ending, ghost sucks at apologising. a/n: I proofread this <- haven't proofread this and things mind not make sense towards the end. might take a bit bc to right this, I'm taking care of a baby chick. ~ ~ ~

You remember how it is to love him. A feeling so strong it swells your heart with affection every single time you caught his gaze on you, felt his skin under your lips, heard his voice against your ear. 

It's like a stab to the heart to find him standing before you after so long. Your chest aches at the sight, squeezing with longing and betrayal and so much love for him. 

“You're alive,” you say, your voice cracking around the words, and swallow your feelings with vengeance, “ten years.”

Ten years. Saying it out loud cements the realization that he was ripped away from you and never did anything to come back.

“I—” you shove the door to his face the moment he opens his mouth but he throws his arm against it to keep it from slamming closed. “Just hear me out!”

It's then that you notice he isn't alone. It's then that you notice his attire is not suitable as civilian wear. It's then that you realize that he is not here for you. 

Not exactly, no. 

You leave him at the door, step deep into the room and head for the last door of your corridor. 

You don't wait for anyone, but you know for a fact that he knows his way to the room with or without your aid. 

The light flickers overhead, it's a surprise it works at all. There's no window to let the air in, so you'll have to put up with the dust and stuffiness. You haven't opened the door to this room in years and it shows. 

There's a mess of documents and pictures in the middle of it all, and you're struck with the memory of you standing over it with a lighter in your hands. 

He was gone, you couldn’t continue to—

With a sigh, you move to get rid of all the rubbish you left so long ago and ignore the footsteps moving to check the room for whatever. 

Someone approaches, crouches opposite you and starts searching through the mess. 

“You were gonna get rid of these too.” Simon holds the booklet of pictures as he flips through it, running gentle fingers over the cover. It isn't even a question, he simply knows it. There's a note of sadness in his voice mixed with resignation and it makes your blood boil.

It's true then, that he doesn't care one bit about what you had together. So ready to give it up at the first sign of hardship. 

“Obviously,” you say with as much venom as you can muster, stealing the album from his hands and shoving it aside —away from his gaze. “You went MIA, then confirmed KIA soon after I started searching for you.” 

I couldn't go through with it. The only thing you did manage to do that day was throw the lighter into the bin and miss. 

Did he do it on purpose? Made them tell you he was gone so you would stop trying? Whatever his reasons, ten years with no word only to come back because he needs something...

“This all I am to you, ain't I?” you say —because despite your field of work you have never learnt to keep your mouth from running, — wave your hand at the room, and stare at him with your jaw set. 

“Look,” he starts, but you're already standing and turning away. He jolts forward and grabs you by the arm, “bloody hell, we don't have time for this.”

“Of course,” you say and watch his eyes grow wide at his own words. “no time for this.” You were a fool to think there had been anything at all.

“That's not... That's not what I—”

“I'll help you with whatever you need,” you cut him off and tag your arm free. “You know my price already.”

There's a hidden door built at the very back of the room, and despite the ten years of negligence all is frozen in the same neat and perfect condition you've left it years back. It's a disorienting contrast with the previous room. 

The change of temperature as you step through the door is refreshing, settling over your shoulders like a familiar embrace. There are cabinets lining all four walls, carrying an insane number of papers and folders and books. Despite the incredible jump technology has gone through its progress, a paper document is still chosen over a digital file. 

If they're seeking your help then hackers are of no use for them, which in turn means whatever they need has long been lost in the past. 

This room is the reason you're still alive really. You haven't touched it in years nor do you have any physical need for it, but the simple knowledge that you are in possession of it makes you invulnerable. Mind maps are crucial for organizing information, sure, but no one will find any use for this room if something happens to your brain. 

“So? Who's and which skeleton in the closet do you want me to reveal to you, so you can go and ruin their life?” You open a drawer at random, pick up the first folder your fingers touch and flip it open. Truth is you have always been quite fond of puzzles and none of these documents mean anything at all. It's just a bunch of random words written using cross writing. 

Simon had found it ridiculous to write whatever you had to say and then turn the page ninety degrees the moment you run out of space. 

But that was the beauty of it. Never mind that you only use gibberish sentences as a guide line to refresh your memory, but the puzzle that cross letters were kept your mind busy. 

You find him standing by the door when you force yourself back to the present. He hasn't said a word, nor has he dared to do anything other than close the door behind him and watch you without moving any deeper into the room. “You used to say that every time someone you hated asked for your help.”

And it's the little things he would notice and remember, that had your heart first beat a little faster back then. The way he would take it as a vantage to express himself when he struggled to process his own emotions. That he went all soft and delicate despite knowing for a fact that you weren't made of glass. All that and more, is what made you fall for him. 

Every single memory is so vivid in your mind but the betrayal and pain and anger are just as fresh in the forefront of your mind that you can't help but sneer at him. “Yes, glad to know I haven't changed at all in the past ten years.”

You're not being petty, you really are not. Because despite it all, you still love him. Just as much as you had the first time you fell for him, the first kiss you shared, the first ‘I love you’ you pressed into his skin, the first date you took him to.

The first time they told you you'd lost him forever. 

Your feelings have only grown, and the pain stabbing through your heart has only grown with them. You know that if you let yourself hope even for the shortest moment, you'll break and will never be able to piece yourself together. 

Photographic memory might be a cool power, a service demanded by the leaders controlling the world, but for you it is nothing but a spiteful curse.

~ ~ ~ please reblog, comment and/or follow if you like what I write. without feedback, I have no reason to keep this blog alive.

[artemisandhersilverbow]

Just thinking about the line from My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys:

I'm queen of sandcastles he destroys

A lot of people have touched on Taylor using castles and palaces as a symbolic representation of her career, body of work, specifically those stolen works and versions of herself. They're locked away in a high tower and separated from Lover - TTPD Taylor.

The tension at the end of Bejeweled, when she walks smiling onto her balcony only to quickly show her castle on fire was, in my opinion, easily overlooked. Was she burning it down or had it already been burning down without her noticing? A stone castle on fire would require some orchestration.

Fast forward to TTPD, the line above from MBOBHFT stuck with me because the "boy" here is destroying her sandcastle. Sandcastles are a study in impermanence. We build them as an incredibly basic recreation of the real, impenetrable, almost indestructable thing. But we do so knowing they can't last, they won't. Eventually the tide will wash them clean away or the wind will erode at the structure until it turns back into sand.

That means "the boy" in question is preemptively destroying something that wasn't supposed to be forever anyway.

The first thing about this song that lit up my brain like a firework was the lyrical parallel to Cruel Summer. I mean, if Taylor uses the word "toy" in a song you know it's gonna be sassy af, ok? A girl takes notice.

Fever dream high in the quiet of the night You know that I caught it Bad, bad boy Shiny toy with a price You know that I bought it -------------------- The sickest army doll Purchased at the mall Rivulets descend my plastic smile But you should've seen him When he first got me My boy only breaks his favorite toys

Now, I have had my speculations (as have many others) about Cruel Summer not being a love song, but a PR-ing song. I almost immediately thought the same of MYBOBHFT.

Fortunately, the Barbie movie covers a lot of ground for the "why is using a kind of Barbie-Ken like dynamic excluding a romantic narrative?" Because she's Barbie, he's just Ken, Ken is basically an accessory. Anyway I think this song is absolutely talking about several people or experiences/problematic Hollywood structures etc. in a very smart twisting narrative.

"Fever dream" is playful here in the same way she uses "sickest. " The doll isn't sick and the narrator of Cruel Summer isn't running a temperature. "Shiny toy" and "sickest army doll" feel like even clearer parallels — one "with a price / You know that I bought it" and the other "purchased at the mall." I like the reversal of "You know that I caught it" and "When he first got me" because catching isn't as active as buying. Something happens to you if you catch a fever or something is thrown at you - and that feels like an entirely different he that "got" her. Another play on words because that sounds like ownership and tricking.

I was so confused by sickest army doll at first because she sings it in such a (Lana coded) morose way. I was trying to imagine a sickly Army Barbie? But I think the smart way she's written these lyrics (please read her lyric booklets they are incredibly sneaky, brilliant works of poetry) she's not referring to the "me" as an army doll. In fact what's an "army doll" little kids think are rad? Hm... a G.I. Joe?

The bait and switch of it all, the sandcastle-like metaphors, continue with the above. It sounds like "there were so many reasons why we should have been together forever." But word choice is where this poet shines.

"Litany" is one of those words that always registers to me a "a list" but it's actually got religious roots (of course - this album has so much of that): a form of prayer used in services and processions, and consisting of a number of petitions.

It can also mean "a prolonged or tedious account," which is why you hear an expression like "litany of complaints"... Got it so you had a tedious amount of prayers and petitions *checks notes* for why you could have "played for keeps" THIS. TIME. Have there been other times? Oh right, yes, she's "just repeating herself."

Play for keeps is another one of those terms we use, but don't always know it's full definition. One such definition is "to do something seriously and without showing any mercy."

This sounds less like holding onto a lover who wanted to leave or mistreated you, though I think that should also another lens to view this story... perhaps change lover to authority figure... and more like two people who struck an agreement (one that upheld some good christian values?? too far?) to battle something together... and one of them couldn't stick it out. Perhaps because "he saw forever so he smashed it up"? He was a Bolter too.

So she just wants to be put back on her shelf so she can go through the cycle all over again. In fact, pull a string and she'll repeat the lines she knows so well. Copy+paste.

"I used to switch out these Kens, I'd just ghost" to "I felt more when we played pretend / Than with all the Kens" with her GI Joe? I mean lumping a "lover" into a category with Kens and any kind of doll purchased isn't the most loving way to refer to them lol. And I can't help but notice she's only ever played pretend with all the Kens. But what do you do with your shiny toy when they don't want to play anymore?

The lyric video is simple, but each line comes up one at a time and "breaks," floating pieces falling out of frame. At the end we pan down to see the collected debris.

A pit of broken words.

Also worth noting you can see among the blurred graveyard of words a couple of them are crisp/hidden. They're "Boy breaks his only favorite" or "favorite only"... or his Favourite?

Anyway, we come back 'round to the sandcastle metaphor that got me started. I don't think Taylor's princess castle and her sandcastle are a perfect one to one match symbolically. A stone castle was built with the intention of lasting forever, if it catches on fire that would be surprising... more akin, to me, to her career or Taylor TM?

A sandcastle, however, can't last forever, it's not meant to, but you still build it knowing that. Like an arrangement, contract, role, etc. business or otherwise. For someone to snuff out a sandcastle before time or tides or the inevitable does that for you seems needlessly harsh. Even a short-lived imitation can mean something if you enjoyed building it. In fact, that's the only part that gets to live on once a sandcastle is washed away. And it seems like even that part was ruined.

[crypticcozycorner]

Daemon/Doll Deluxe Album Bundle!

My copy of the @daemondollalbum deluxe merch bundle came a while ago and I realized I completely forgot to post about it! I’m so happy with everything! Close ups and talking about each item under the cut!

The actual album!

Firstly, I absolutely love the cover art for this album! Very cute! It also include a little booklet with all the song lyrics! The case is cardboard rather than a plastic hard case which may be a turn off for some but for me I don’t mind!

Acrylic keychain

This is probably my favorite item that came with it! It’s a great size (a bit bigger than some of my other keychains which I actually quite like). One side features Tetos original design and her V-synth design, well the other has the designs made for the album. The art on both sides is amazing and I love how she’s on bread!

Acrylic standie

Very very cute! Not too big and not too small! The design is just flipped on the back, but the base itself actually has a different design on each side so you can pick which one is facing the front

Stickers!

The stickers a cute, big, and super high quality matte! It’s gonna be hard to actually use them cuz they’re just so cute!

Card

This was a super nice surprise! It seems every order comes with a random card for one of the producers and the art for the song they made for the album! I got RIProducer’s card which has art from the song “language of the lost”! It has a soft matte finish with the silver text being raised!

Im very happy with this order! All the merch is adorable and a great celebration of my favorite vocal synth! And of course, the music is absolutely amazing too! Very happy I decided to get the merch version!

[blacknwhitemood]

I'm not friend of CD-s, my childhood was full of LPs and tapes. But used CDs are very cheap and when I find somthing that I haven't got in LP yet and I'm not planning to for some reason, I'm happy with them. I already bought 2 maxi CDs (scroll down) from 1998 and 2009 (my karaoke songs), LPs weren't popular that years.

The Singles 1981→1985 original CD from '85, Made in France - which is precious for me, my sister's original Violator LP that we listened to many times is Virgin edition with French stickers on the cover. I have French DM books, I'll post soon. I have the US version LP (Catching Up With) and I'm going to buy the European LP yet in this year if I got an offer.

In the booklet there are all singles' cover, I miss just a few:

It's No Good, 1997, Made in Great Britain - of course it's original. I love this song, I think this is enough to buy a cheap CD with a sexy booklet and post card (!):

People Are People, 1984, Printed in U.S.A. - I didn't know this collection album (missing CD cover, here you are), it released in North and South America before Some Great Reward, after the single which made DM famous in the US.

So this 5 CDs are enough for now, but I miss some vinyls - 12 singles and 5 albums, I'm not finished yet...

[reimulin]

do you guys want to see my American Idiot plot manifesto? no? i don't care, here it is anyway

(under cut)

no i did not watch the American Idiot musical for this. also wake me up when September ends is not included because BJA has stated that it isn't part of the album's story.

i exercised a little bit of artistic liberty but for the most part this is as accurate to the apparent story of the album as possible. ok thank you please enjoy ^^

THE GOSPEL OF THE JESUS OF SUBURBIA

Characters:

Jesús O. Salvador: Middle name unknown. 1st generation Mexican immigrant who now lives in Jingletown (Oakland, California). Nicknames: JOS (pronounced Johss), the Jesus of Suburbia, St. Jimmy (alter ego). 15 (debatably).

“Wisteriya”: Given name Amanda, last name unknown. Mostly just referred to as Whatsername, as Jesús avoids saying her name. (Got the name from squinting really hard at the covered up name in the American Idiot physical lyric book)

Tunar “Tunny” Qurbanov: Jesús’s friend he met in The City. Off the boat Azerbaijani immigrant who makes it big in New York.

Timeline:

(2004) cw for everything under the sun

direct/credible sources: american idiot cd booklet, genius lyrics

narrative speculation/inspiration: "why green day matters" by fort collins productions (youtube), "saint jimmy" by ussnicole (archiveofourown)

February 23rd: (American Idiot) Jesús writes his first diary entry/poem, an angry piece about the government, 9/11, and the dead end he feels like he has reached. While this entry outlines his basic beliefs about the world, it isn’t very important to his personal story.

March 3rd: (Jesus of Suburbia) The “Jesus of Suburbia” suite is born. The first act is more teenage angst, as was in the last entry. However, this one is more focused on his own situation. His step-father (Brad) is a horrible man of Rage, and his mother is a devout Christian of Love, but she lets his father’s behavior slide. He believes himself to be somewhat like his namesake, and he is the most self-centered kid in the world. He centers his religious beliefs around himself, a product of the divided and individualistic country that raised him. Jesús believes the problem is society, not himself. His Christ complex has taken over his mind, and he compares wasting his life away with drugs and tv to crucifixion.

Jesús, when not at home, mainly hangs out at the 7/11. He describes the 7/11 and Jingletown in general as the “City of the Dead”, a place where no one comes or goes, and if you’re born there, you’re stuck there. The graffiti in the 7/11 bathroom, some by those who came before him, some by Jesús himself, is regarded by him to be his own Bible. Likewise, he feels like he is the culmination of this graffiti Bible, fulfilling the prophecies written on the walls. But the bathroom is not only the Bible for him; it’s also the center of the earth, and his own hell. His belief system is a little bit confusing. He’s only 15(?), after all.

After he writes about all of this, he begins to break down, entering the third act of his suite. He screams into the paper about how nobody cares, and neither does he. He sees the world as a bunch of hypocrites who don’t care to understand him. Here he reveals his “kids of war and peace”, his group of freshmen who follow his every word like his disciples. He cares about them, but his own self-centeredness gets in the way of forming a real connection beyond that of their leader.

Now that he is thinking of them, he writes a cryptic draft of a letter that he will eventually give to his disciples, titled “Dearly Beloved”. In his mind, it’s his own private eulogy. He tries to reflect on his own behavior, but his own complexes get in the way. 

The final part of the suite would eventually be written in the 7/11 bathroom as his “final words” to his disciples and those who hated him alike. He decides to run away from home, moving to The City. He steals Holiday from his stepfather Brad, a 1968 Mercury Monterey convertible that he drills a hand grenade piece to the head of. He vows to never fit into society’s “line” again. He will not keep this promise.

April 1st: (Holiday) Jesús picks up his diary again, as he approaches The City on Holiday. Not even he is sure how long it took to get there. He revisits the ideas of his original entry, writing an angry piece about the government after hearing a particularly egregious speech from a Californian politician on his car radio. Despite his rage, he is starting to regret running away from his old life. He tries to convince himself that it was the right move to escape suburbia.

April 2nd: (BVOBD) With The City in sight, Jesús crashes Holiday for seemingly no reason. However, he is only a couple of miles away, and resolves to walk the rest of the way. He writes as he goes, lamenting how he walks alone now as he always did. The City sleeps as he finally steps foot into the heart of the place he had always dreamed of. When he gets there, though, he realizes how alone he really is, and he doesn’t know what to do next, and he wishes for someone to find him.

April 11th: (Are We The Waiting) Easter Sunday. More than a week after his arrival, Jesús still hasn’t found his true home in The City, and is starting to hate it. The loneliness is eating him alive. He misses the reputation he had in Jingletown, and he misses how his disciples idolized him. He even starts to miss his family. He finally breaks down in an alley, his mental state shattering, as he realizes how wrong he was about his life back home; he was never the Jesus of Suburbia.

May 7: (St. Jimmy) Jesús doesn’t know what happened between Easter and the day St. Jimmy was born. But according to his diary, this is the day he truly lost his mind. And it was taken over by an alter ego: St. Jimmy. He resolves that if he cannot be the Jesus of Suburbia, then he’ll be the patron saint of denial, the suicidal prince of his own religion. He emerges from the alleyway a new man. Jimmy is better than he ever was in his mind: confident, anarchist, and the son of Rage rather than Love. He begins to collect new disciples, the Forty Thieves, named after the Arabian tale, and he becomes their King instead of their savior. His right-hand man is Tunny, who will go on to be more successful than he ever was, who was someone he never appreciated while he had him. Jesús always did drugs, but his addiction spirals out of control, paralleling the “drug” of St. Jimmy’s persona. He even publicly disowns his own parents, stating his father to be Edgar Allen Poe. His followers learn not to question his madness.

June 13th: (Give me Novacaine) Jesús rides the high of St. Jimmy for a while, but in his private moments he’s just as broken as he ever was. Even when it’s just him and his painkillers, Jimmy still pops into his head to taunt him, and he begs for the release from his personal hell. On this night, he overdoses in the alley he now calls home. However, he is found and saved by none other than Wisteriya.

July 4th: (She's a Rebel) After Wisteriya saves him from death, the two become inseparable, and Jesús falls madly in love with her. He absolutely idolizes her, seeing her as the unwavering spirit of rebellion, and the true patron saint of his movement. Her real name is Amanda, but she changed her name and appearance to be more “punk feminist”, in her own words. Wisteriya becomes his new Bible in the absence of his 7/11 bathroom, and she becomes his new Messiah figure, as she seems to fulfill the prophecies that had been written by him since he entered the city. Later, Jesús will refer to her as Whatsername.

(Extraordinary Girl) He doesn’t date the second entry, but it can be assumed it was written a bit later in their relationship. This is where the cracks in their relationship start to form, but Jesús still idolizes her as much as ever. Despite this, he begins to see how she is still human, and he writes about her crying. The troubles in their relationship are not well reported on in Jesús’s diary, so it's unclear what exactly she is crying about. However, Jesús writes about how it feels as if she never really wanted him, but dates him out of desperation for love. This entry appears to be a collaborative effort, as Wisteriya’s handwriting can be seen among Jesús’s. She refers to herself for the first time here as Whatsername.

August 18th: (Letterbomb) A letter is pasted into the diary, given to him by Wisteriya. In one final act of rage and desperation, she breaks off their relationship, telling him that nobody likes him, and hands him her final letter before leaving The City and him behind. Wisteriya tells him that his “movement” failed, and he will never be the revolutionary savior he wants to be so badly. She points out his hypocrisy, and how The City is crumbling around him to his total apathy. She tears down St Jimmy, calling him what he is: a figment of his true parents’ rage AND love, and merely a front for Jesús’s own self-centeredness. She tears down the Jesus of Suburbia, pointing out how much of a poser he is, and how he only ever loved the idea of her. Finally, she tears down Jesús himself, telling him that she’s leaving before he can destroy her too. She leaves him with a plea to stop over-analyzing and actually do something with his life. After she’s gone, Jesús realizes that she was right, and that he was the American Idiot all along. However, her message doesn’t totally reach him, and he chooses quiet apathy to The City burning down around him.

October 19th: (Homecoming) This is probably a year later. His final suite begins with a transcription of his final message to Wisteriya, now referred to as Whatsername. He reflects on the past few months, which he spent trying to change himself and reflect, to questionable results. He asks her to come back to him when he comes home.

After Whatsername leaves, Jesús decides to disband his “cult”, but St. Jimmy steps in and instead tells his disciples that none of their problems are their own fault, and they should blame their parents for everything. This is the final straw for Jesús, as he attempts to kill St. Jimmy in one final religious ritual: the suicide Jimmy craved so badly. He attempts to shoot himself in the head over the bay, and the bullet hits his head, but his life is saved by Tunny, who pushes the gun out of the way just in time. He still retains a horrible injury, but survives. Despite not killing him, Jesús says that the ritual worked, and that even if he didn’t succeed in committing suicide, Jimmy was satisfied by the bullet in his head and was defeated.

With this, Jesús resigns himself to the life of the average American worker, taking an internship and spending his life dealing with paperwork at East 12th Street. (East Jesus Nowhere???) He grows up to live an outwardly normal life, casting away all his past affiliations, but he is filled with self-hatred and regret. He seems to also be developing severe anxiety. Most of all, he can’t seem to let go of Whatsername.

November 10: Jesús’s mental state reaches rock bottom yet again, after months of waiting for Whatsername to show up, or call him, or at least send him a letter, she hasn’t. One night, he stays up as long as he can, downing 10 cups of coffee so he isn’t asleep when she responds. He thinks about what she said to him before she left: Nobody likes you, everyone left you, they’re all out without you having fun.

He does get a message in the mail, but it’s not from Whatsername: it’s from Tunny, whom he attempted to contact along with Whatsername. He sends him a postcard from New York, where his band had made it big. He chastises Jesús, and brags about his new life, inadvertently telling him how much better he has it now, and how Jesús will never be that punk that wanted to change the world again. He ends the postcard with a request for him to stop contacting Tunny complaining about how his life ended up. He doesn’t say so, but he means to tell him that his situation is his own fault.

Finally, he resolves to stop complaining and to look towards the future, accepting that he’ll never have his old life and girlfriend back. He visits his old 7/11 bathroom, what he views as the source of his teenage madness, and paints over his graffiti, erasing the gospel of the Jesus of Suburbia. He sends one final letter to Whatsername, summarizing the Homecoming suite, and finally returns to Jingletown. He walks through the streets of his hometown, singing Whatsername’s words to himself, the only piece of his old life he will keep with him.

January 1st: (Whatsername) Many years later, Jesús encounters Whatsername in a dream. He reminisces on his time with her, and tries to forget her, the final part of his past he needs to put to rest.

thank you for reading! hope this made sense. no i did not proofread this before posting. feel free to ask questions ^^

[sheirukitriesfandom]

Tag game from @wispstalk: post your 9 favorite album covers. Aesthetics, not necessarily favorite albums.

Got tagged by @dirty-bosmer and @skyrim-forever. Thank you, you know how much I love to nerd about music & related topics. All metal this time because let's face it, we just got the best album covers. We wear them on shirts for a reason 😁

1. Cathedral - The Ethereal Mirror

I actually have a favourite album artist:

Dave Patchett, responsible for those gorgeous Cathedral album artworks as well as the Electric Wizard debut album and, funnily enough, the infamous artwork of Dance of Death by Iron Maiden. However, the band used the barebones prototype, which resulted in Patchett not wanting to be credited.

What I love about those covers is not just their freaky, Hieronymus Bosh-esque design, but also that they come as posters in the actual booklets, so one can really appreciate all the little details.

2. Kamelot - The Black Halo

I love the sinister undertone of this artwork, befitting a two-album story loosely based on Goethe's Faust.

3. Ghost - Meliora

This is a cover that warrants a second look. At first it's just sinister in the same way how, at night, some people tend to interpret grimaces into everyday things. But then you take a closer look and see that there's some sort of sacrifice going on.

4. Cattle Decapitation - The Anthropocene Extinction

You look at this artwork and know everything there is to know about the album, from the topic to the sound. And both punch you in the face.

5. Epica - The Holographic Principle

Not much to say here; I just love the use of colour in this piece.

6. Ahab - The Call of the Wretched Sea

I love how this artwork feels like a painting from the late 18th/early 19th century. Also, it's one of those tell-tale artworks. You know this album is atmospheric, brutal, and about Moby Dick.

7. Amorphis - Under the Red Cloud

This is an album artwork where, the longer you look at it, the more details you spot. At first it just looks like an abstract pattern but then...

8. Subrosa - More Constant than the Gods

Minimalist elegance compared to the rest of the list, but no less beautiful and very fitting for the album.

9. Pain of Salvation - Remedy Lane

This artwork fits the album soo well. I love how those people almost seem to interweave, just like their lives are intertwined on the album. I also love how this artwork conveys intimacy despite only depicting two approximations of people. There's also a hint of darkness in there—love it!

Tagging: @elavoria @thequeenofthewinter @miraakulous-cloud-district @littlegalerion @alma-amentet and @nostalgic-breton-girl

[get-back-homeward]

Guess what arrived this week!

I never buy reissues let alone preorder, but I had a hunch this set would be worth having, and I’m very happy with it. They look lovely together.

There's a nice little essay in each booklet that feels very appropriate for the times. You can read them here and here. If I had anything to complain about I'd say the CD sleeves are pretty risky. They're so tight, you gotta pinch them just right to get the CD out without scratching. I doubt I'm putting them back to their original spots. The spot behind the booklet is wide enough and will work fine as a substitute if you have single protective sleeves for each disc.

But all I really care about is the sound. And man, the sound knocks me out. Giles really outdid himself with these mixes. The only one I'd say I'm truly unhappy with is I Am The Walrus. The 2017 mix was fine to me, and messing with the ending seems silly, but it's easy enough to swap out. Out of 75 tracks, I expect a few to not be my favorite. It's more than worth it for the tracks that have clarified the sound and helped me to hear details I couldn't before.

The big changes are the additional songs, including George's songs and covers, and the 2023 mixes. With the backwards reissues, it's the Red Album that has the most new mixes here. They really surpass my expectations. This is the best I've ever heard their 1963 songs. Disc 1 adds I Saw Her Standing There, Twist and Shout, Roll Over Beethoven, This Boy, You Really Got a Hold On Me, and You Can't Do That. Disc 2 adds If I Needed Someone, Taxman, Got to Get You Into My Life, I'm Only Sleeping, Here There and Everywhere, and Tomorrow Never Knows. I have no qualms with any of them, they all feel like they belong here.

The biggest advantage of these newest mixes is the space between parts. It helps to hear Ringo's drums and percussion better in one part and George's guitar in another, hear Paul's bass here and harmonies there. I don't find any of the mixes too drastic save Walrus but together they really elevate the listening experience.

I found myself flagging John's songs as sounding best, and I think that may be a function of hearing more of the layers underneath along with the clarified vocals. Some of his harmonies with Paul just sound exceptionally good with this new tech. Norwegian Wood is a standout, as is Ticket to Ride. Norwegian Wood seems to push John's vocals further to the front instead of getting masked by the acoustic. The three-part harmonies sound divine on This Boy and Nowhere Man. I've seen criticism about the space changing the magic of the Rubber Soul tracks. If you don't like it, it's easy enough to swap out, but I didn't really have a problem with it.

On the Blue Album, of the five new mixes, Magical Mystery Tour and Hey Bulldog stand out best. It's actually kinda embarrassing how much I was missing from MMT before. I felt halfway through like I was listening to a brand new song. My one quibble is the strange placement of Hey Bulldog. It expected it to follow Lady Madonna on Disc 1 for roughly chronological order but instead it's between Blackbird and Get Back on Disc 2. I guess they were going by order of original release instead of recording date order used in the Anthology. But it was the one place the order threw me for a loop.

Placing Now and Then at the end of this hefty 75 track list is a controversial choice perhaps, but I think it bears the weight of the legacy well. Particularly because it's following The Long & Winding Road, which ends on Paul's plea: Don't leave me waiting here Lead me to your door

Now and Then starts with John's confession: I know it's true It's all because of you And if I make it through It's all because of you

It feels like a continuation of a conversation. An answer.

Paul's lyrical input is small but powerful, adding "will" and "always" to add certainty to John's cool now and then I miss you. Two lines were incomplete and required that Paul finish them. The completed line packs a punch: I want you to be there for me Always to return to me

This is officially the last Lennon-McCartney lyric, constructed across decades. But it doesn't feel like an ending, only a completed circle. Perhaps because this ending so seamlessly loops back to the beginning again: Love love me do You know I love you I'll always be true So plea-ee-ee-ease Love me do

And I guess if you want to go further: I'll do anything for you Anything you want me to If you'll be true to me

You can find bits across the track list that link as well: Now and then I feel so insecure Know that I just need you like I never done before

I’ll get to you somehow/until I do I’m telling you so you’ll understand

Life is very short and there’s no time for fussing and fighting my friend

Though I know I’ll never lose affection for people and things that went before I know I’ll often stop and think about them

To lead a better life I need my love to be here

Had you gone you knew in time we’d meet again for I had told you

Knowing that love is to share, each one believing that love never dies

Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns and calls me on and on across the universe

It leaves me with an abundance of multiverse AU feels in the vein of Everything Everywhere All At Once.

Maybe there is something out there, some new discovery, that will make us feel like even smaller pieces of shit. Something that explains why you still went looking for me, through all of this noise. And why, no matter what, I still want to be here with you. I will always want to be here with you.

I would just like to say, in another life, I would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you.

We live in the world they chose music and fame, and the songs they leave us with is their legacy and our gift.

The press for these releases has been a mess. But the BBC Eras series on The Beatles ends on two quotes that been stuck in my head all week:

It’s the last song that my dad and Paul and George and Ringo will get to make together. You know, even though it took a long time, it feels very synchronous that the lyric speaks about time and that it’s taken so much time and that it sort of fuses the past and present. It's like a time capsule. And it all feels very meant to be or fated or something. In the nicest sense. —Sean Lennon

When I remember the Beatles, I remember the joy. The talent. The humor. The love. And I think if people remembered us for that, for those things, I’d be very happy. —Paul McCartney

Full circle, indeed.

[lock-my-feelings-in-a-jar]

For the ask, 13, 14 and 26 please :)

13. "what's an album cover that you would frame and put up in your house?"

all of them. no, there are probably some out there i wouldn't want, actually. i want all of russ ballard's albums on my wall. i want the book of love one and the seer one both blown up bigger than the rest. and i want the other pictures from the seer photoshoot on the wall too because i love everything. i would want one wall dedicated to each of my favorite bands, hopefully with enough space for each of their albums, or my favorite ones at least.

band posters everywhere. i want instruments on my walls. i want lyrics on my walls. in between the russ album covers, i would have his lyrics littered all over the place, on the ceilings too. with a bunch of hearts. because i love him and i love that he is full of love.

14. do you have any music related home decoration?

in my bedroom, i have a very cheap violin that i have leaning on top of my dresser against the wall, in the case. i'm not super into learning that and i don't think i even can anyway because the tuner things don't stay when you tighten them or anything. but anyway, i like having it just to look at it. my boyfriend has some kiss posters, but they're not up on the walls or anything. i have an empty iron maiden cd case of the number of the beast that i always have leaning against the side of my computer on my desk(the cd was missing but i wanted the case anyway with the little booklet in it). besides that, i don't think i have anything else. i want more things though.

26. is there/what is a song that you always associate with a movie or tv show?

i don't really watch movies or tv shows often, so not really. besides maybe like, a theme song of one. like SOMETIMES YOU WANNA GO WHERE EVERYBODY KNOWS YOUR NAAAAAME AND THEY'RE ALWAYS GLAD YOU CAAAAAMMME. the cheers theme song. i love that one. OH AND 'this old man' always reminds me of columbo because he always whistled it in the show. i used to love watching columbo years ago.

[getta-guy]

hi love your HCs but i just thought i'd clarify something. the splatoonJP introduction tweet for front roe actually says that their main focus is live shows. the booklet only specifies that they don't perform/promotion in splatsville (bankara city in jpn, the place splat3 takes place in), meaning that they'd still perform in the wider splatlands area (bankara region). very confusing i know since they start with the same word dsfds

This is from the Splatune 3 album, where it says they never made their true faces public. How would they perform? have their faces covered? (can you play an instrument and not look at where you're playing?) holograms? (actually that sounds like a cool idea)

If they still do live shows, I'd expect a comment on Ichiya's rabbid fanbase (they're still real, they've beaten Beika's ASS in the QRTS)

I'm not sure if this is a mistranslation or not because the person who had the translations removed it from their pinned and I could only find the older translation

Here's a link hopefully you aren't blocked and if you are I can send the photos

[thenightling]

Someone just told me that Wingtips has done a new cover of Savage Garden's Tears of Pearls. I prefer the Savage Garden version. I remember when my Mother got me to listen to the song.  My Mother was very into Savage Garden and she heard most of the first album's songs before I did.  She read a certain line from the lyrics out loud to me from the CD booklet because she felt it sounded Gothic and thought I'd like it. "We twist and turn where angels burn, As fallen soldiers we will learn Once forgotten Twice removed Love will be the death... The death of you..." I was going to link the Wingtips version but now I'm thinking of my Mother and I prefer the original anyway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efYH-9E0mak

[exnihilo-comic]

hello zero. do you have a rec list of songs? a playlist?

ok, so theres no easy answer for this

idk how to describe my musical tastes. i guess i could put them in a 3-axis graph, like this, and just kinda let the artists fall where they may

ive always enjoyed obscure and acoustic indie artists, as well as weird and obscure rock bands and mainstream rock bands. im always scared to "actively" listen to music for some reason. ill just find something i like and then seek it out organically after listening it.

pink floyd - i used to listen to my mom's pink floyd CDs on my sisters stereo a lot. my mom bought them to entertain guests whenever her friends would come over for drinks. 'Animals' is my favorite, and i never got into 'Dark Side of the Moon' that much but i liked its themes. 'Animals' gives me feelings of being a kid and imagining what it's like to be an adult. if you look at the album art for 'Wish You Were Here' along with the art and lyrics in the CD booklet, it all gives a very futuristic machination feel and it unnerved me so much i didnt listen to it. it scared me. now i love it, and its my favorite PF album art. look up tattoos of it, its great.

the real tuesday weld - contender for my fav band. i own physical music from them more than any other artist. i saw the video for Bathtime In Clerkenwell as a kid on MTV and it blew me away (anyone who knows me knows i love animation + black and white + russian art). when i realized it wasnt just a video but a music video for a band, i went down this rabbit hole of the entire band and it made me appreciate weird electronic lounge music. this is what P!ATD tried to do but failed spectacularly. its music from the past if they had the tools of the future. i listen to their music and i feel like im dreaming, its ethereal. their last album they released (the next to last to be released) was called Dreams and thats what i feel when i hear them.

i think my fav songs lately are Let It Come Down (calming jazz lounge) Silicone (noir theme for two fucked up lovers) One More Chance (cabaret duet letter from Lucifer addressed to God). one of my fav videos is probably the one for Me And Mr Wolf (contains blood and cartoon violence) my popsocket is lifted right from the video. it looks rough, i know

the peculiar pretzelmen - i heard these dudes bc i was actually looking for music like TRTW. they describe themselves as "voodoo death stomp" and it reminds me i love sad angry folk music and bluegrass. you, yes you, specifically, notfredjohnson, ive told about them to before. i have listened to a LOT of their work all year and are my current go to for music to listen to during my drive to work.

rabbit foot blues - hardcore romp ode to those with nothing and everything

sing along - how do you accept that someone doesnt want to be in your life anymore? i guess sing a song

crazy man michael is an amazing heartfelt cover of a beautiful song from the 70s

other songs i tend to like a lot solely bc i REALLY like female vocalists. i just do, they carry so much pain and hurt in their voices that just comes natural to a female singing voice.

behind these hazel eyes by kelly clarkson, nobody's home by avril lavigne, im sorry i love you by the magnetic fields, sober by p!nk, the lions roar by first aid kit,

diamonds cutting diamonds by lydia ainsworth, waiting around to die by the be good tanyas, iron horse by mean mary, with me wherever i go by laurie lewis

theres so much more in so many weird and different genres so i think ill close with ein astronaut. heres turn, which im obsessed with (i fucking love accordion) and here he is doing vocals for WREN in she'd never know

[italobrutalo]

Happy New Year everyone! In January I’ll make a recap series of 2022 for me to remember what had happened in 12 months. I start with my debutalbum „Heartware“ what has been a giant step in my career but also personally. Although there have been some offers from other labels i decided to release it on my own label @bungalo_disco with the help of my partner Tania. Without her Heartware would not be as nice and cool as it is. She spent lots of time, love and energy in designing the cover and booklet. The most important point for releasing it on my own label was to have 100% creative control and freedom in any step without making any compromises or having discussions. Although it was a lot of work from the very first note till bringing the final product into the stores worldwide it was absolutely worth doing it exactly this way. Another important decision was not to put it out on spotify, itunes, amazon, etc. in the first step. At the moment it’s available on vinyl on bandcamp, physical recordstores worldwide and digital recordstores as well. Besides that it’s available on cd and tape and as digital download exclusively on bandcamp. Thank you @robertdrewek and your team from @dbh_music_distribution for making an amazing distribution job to have this album in stores worldwide and for believing in Bungalo Disco since the very first record! I really want to thank you all out there for your support and lovely messages! Also thanks to everyone who played songs of it, charted single songs or the whole album! ❤️ #heartware #debutalbum #bungalodisco #italobrutalo #indielabel #independentlabel #recordlabel #doublevinyl #vinylart #vinylcoverart #intoasampler #floppydisc #mpc3000 #akaimpc3000 #booklet #recordbooklet #electronica #doublelp #dbh #dbhmusic https://www.instagram.com/p/Cm6gPu8MOjE/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=