#a nice family episode that ties in the past with future chapters/book

[bolbianddolanhouse]

BNHA self insert AU [Book 2]

Lost and confused? Read this post to catch you up!

Chapter 9: Look At All Those Chickens!

I wake up, still laying on Hoshi’s chest and his arms around me...it’s Sunday! Sundays usually means we have people over and have family time. I jump awake, my siblings don’t know I’m home! I get ready to bolt to my room.

“Hmm? Come back to bed” yawned Hoshi as he rolled onto his side “you were warm and I’m still sleepy.”

“Sorry! I gotta do something on the quicks” I said before taking off at top speed. I manage to evade the doggy and my parents as I dash up the stairs. Finally reaching the pink door, I compose myself before barging in. “WAKE UP SLEEPYHEAD!” I scream before slamming myself on top of my little sister.

“The fuck?!-LILI?!” grumpily responded Rosa “it’s too early for this shit!”

“Oh yea? The tickle monster has something to say about that!” I threatened with my fingers wiggling in her face.

“OH PLEASE HAVE MERCY LILI!” screamed Rosa, now wide awake.

“What’s going on here?!” said Oro as he stomped into view of the open room “Some of us enjoy waking up later! Seriously Lili! I don’t care if you’re back YOU ALWAYS DO THIS SHIT!”

“Guys can you keep it down? I wanna sleep more” groggily spoke Iwa as he floated into view, pillow and blanket still on him.

“Aw get in this guys!” I said as I lasso them in for a doggy pile “I miss you guys! dorm life sucks!”

“Oof you got stronger” Oro groaned as he was squished between his twin and older brother “when the hell did you come home?”

“In the middle of the night, like at around 4am” yawned Iwa “I was still up when I heard them come home via portal, dad was crying and shit.”

“Dad cried?” Rosa scowled “that’s concerning, what happened Lili?”

“Well, um” I saw the three of them look at me with their concerned eyes “lets just say Hoshi and I got seriously hurt in a non-training situation.”

“Ugh your explanations suck” Oro groaned “I should’ve just asked Mom.”

“Yea” said the other two.

“Fuck y’all! I’m trying here!” I argue back, which triggered a full blown sibling argument. We didn’t even notice our parents standing the doorway.

“It’s been too quiet around here” Dad whispered “this is more like it.”

Mom chuckles “You miss the Sunday morning screamies?”

“They grow on you after a while, after Lili learned to scream as an infant, I can’t start my days without those screams” he said as the arguing got louder “They sure grow up fast, wish we could keep them little forever.”

“They have to leave at some point Tenya” Mom said as she put her head on his shoulder “we can’t cut their fruits and pack their lunches forever. One day, they’ll want to do that for their kids.” The moment got ruined once the first guttural screech was thrown “Okay, that’s enough! NINOS!”

We stopped and pointed at each other “THEY STARTED IT!”

“I don’t care who started it!” Mom levitated us off the bed “if you’re so rowdy before brunch, then you can rowdy your asses to do some chores before food!”

“AW WACK!” we groaned as got set down on the floor.

“None of that! Come on” Dad responded “I’m going in that bathroom in 20 minutes and it better be clean!”

That got us dashing to our shared bathroom, not only is it huge BUT it’s never completely clean. There’s always hair everywhere, melted hair product bottles, some weird residue on the ceiling and the toilets are in a constant state of broken somehow. Once we got the approval of cleanliness from dad, he let me go with Hoshi while everyone else had to other chores. I rejoined him in the guest room and he looked so confused on why my family is like this. Later we all sat down for bunch, as per Sunday tradition.

“Mom, who’s coming over today?” asked Oro as he stuck his mug out for a second cup of coffee.

“Hm, The Midoriya’s, Mr. Bakugo’s family, Beizu and his mom, aunty Mimi and uncle Jin with Nikita” Mom made her thinking face “and I think that’s everybody, not too many today.”

“Uncle Tensei isn’t coming?” I asked as he always comes over on Sundays.

“Not for a while I’m afraid” Dad said as he poured coffee for Oro “the agency has been picking up on a lot of missions and he’s needed more than usual.”

“Aw, I wanted to see him” I pouted “I’ve been homesick and missing my family since I moved into the dorms.”

“Oh it be like that” Mom empathized with me “but if you want, you can come over on your free weekends. You too Hoshi.”

“You mean it?” Hoshi spoke up as he was cutting up his waffle.

Mom nodded “Of course! You can even bring your dirty laundry to do in peace here” she nudged dad “remember all the dorm laundry room antics?!”

Dad chuckled “How could I forget?! The underwear fight of second year was a disaster!”

“Why didn’t you say anything Dad? Weren’t you the class rep?” I scowled.

“Yes but I was pelted with underwear too!” he chopped his hands “I had to call your mom to put a stop to everything, but then she joined in and I just laid on the floor to rethink my life choices.”

We laughed and ate some more before we had to do some more chores. Mom went to the store with Mimi and Jin to pick up some last minute items. Since my hands still hurt, dad just let me rest on the hammock while he picked oranges.

“Dad, can I ask you something?” I broke the silence “about you and mom?”

“Hm? What do you want to know?” he responded while picking an orange.

“When you were living in the dorms, were you attached to mom?” I shifted to lay on my side, facing him “like, did you constantly check in on her or made up excuses to visit their room?”

He stopped reaching for oranges and turned to look at me “Yes I did, even when she moved into the proper dorms” he chuckled softly “I was so nosey and up in her business that it got her mad all the time! Though, a couple times I’ve crossed the line and made her cry. But all I wanted to do was let her know I was there for her and that she was safe.” He set the nearly full basket of oranges down and sat on the step stool “I did it out of love, I didn’t know it was at first but when I’d go above and beyond for the simplest of things, that’s when I knew. When we’d spend time alone together, I’d hold her in my arms and she’d tell me they feel like home. And when she hugs me, I don’t want her to let go! Her embrace felt like a mother’s love and her laughter warms my heart.” He takes off his glasses to wipe them down “but not everything was nice and sweet, there would be days where she’d shut everyone out. She’d disappear for hours or days at a time, and I would worry myself sick. Agent training often had her body covered in injuries and of course she wouldn’t let me tend to them or help her.” the sound of my siblings dragging out chairs startled us “There was one time where I got her so mad, she yelled at me when I tried to stop her from leaving the dorms. She teleported off and hours later ran into trouble” his voice cracked “she nearly died that night if she didn’t call for help. I carried her bleeding and limp body to the hospital, begging her to wake up and for the staff to save her. That was the scariest night of my life, all of that could’ve been avoided if I didn’t step in the beginning.” he reached for an orange and started peeling it “she later apologized to me that it was her fault but I took all the blame, because it was truly my fault. Later that year I found out she was dating Mr. Hitoshi and it broke my heart, I loved her first and did so much to get her attention, it wasn’t fair. And right before graduation, I fought with her to the point that I broke our friendship off. After our graduation ceremony, she wished me well and all I did was tell her I don’t want to see or talk to her ever again. What a stupid thing to do because then I lost all contact with her for years, and the stupidest thing of all... I missed her immediately and never stopped thinking about her, worried myself sick if she was okay. Years of that Lili! And yet, when I saw her again, she forgave me and still wanted to be friends. I honestly don’t deserve your mom” he put the peeled orange in my hand “my constant nagging in the dorms escalated into spending the rest of my life with her and building the family we always wanted.”

“You wanted all that?” I said pointing at Oro laughing at Rosa getting the fire burps as Iwa aggressively sweeps the patio in the background.

Dad laughed “Yes, we wanted a big, chaotic family” he turned to face me again “you remind me so much of her.”

I sniffed the orange “How?”

“You speak your mind, extremely talented, expressive, funny, stands up for what they believe in” he stands up “super caring, a little dense and brave.”

I watch him walk away with the basket of oranges back inside the house. That got me thinking that maybe I am repeating my parent’s love story, but I’m playing the role of my dad, ew.

“Is there room for another?” asked Hoshi as they walked up to me.

“Get in here” I scooted to make room for them “this baby can support all of my siblings in one go.”

He laughed as he nestled into the hammock “I bet that’s a story to tell!”

“Not really, my siblings and I like to swing here and eat oranges every now and then” I recalled “its just our thing, since we moved in this house.”

Mom pops into the backyard “Iwata, Tensei? Can you help me bring in the groceries?” the boys run in the house to help.

“Wait, their names aren’t Iwee and Oro?” asked Hoshi confused.

I laughed “No, Iwee is just a cutesy shorten version of his name that I call him, Tensei is Oro’s first name. My dad named him after his brother, so to not confuse the two during family gatherings, we call him Oro.”

“Oh that makes sense!” He turned to me “does everyone call you Lili?”

“For the most part, my mom and grandparents on my mom’s side call me Perla” I spilt the orange in half “sometimes Maru and the other kids I grew up with call me Perla when I’m acting up.”

He takes the half orange I offered him “How was that like?”

“I never really clicked with them, there’s 2 girls out of the 7 in the group that I grew up with” I sighed “all they wanna do is either be like their hero parents or be granddaddy’s favorite for the inheritance.”

“Yikes, I see why you don’t click with them.”

“Yea, I kinda wish I had friends within my age group like my siblings” on cue, Iwa’s friend Beizu rolls in the backyard and waves at me “see? that’s Iwa’s best friend since birth, and my aunty Mimi’s daughter is best friends with the twins.” I wave back “Hi Bei! How’s school going?”

“You know...I hate it” he giggled “How’s hero school?”

“Oh you already know...I hate it!” We laughed before he dipped back into the house to find Iwa “Don’t tell anybody, but Iwa and Beizu are my favorites. Those boys are always on their schemes but are the sweetest, wholesome boys.”

Soon, everyone else rolled in and mom got the table grill ready. Mom would tell me about the Sunday backyard carne asadas her family would throw to gather everyone for family time. Now we have something similar but readjusted for asian pallets, we have backyard yakiniku now. She says it’s way easier since she doesn’t have to cook the meat and everyone helps themselves. I love an innovative queen.

“That pork belly looks divine!” drooled Hoshi as we looked over what we wanted first “and who made that mountain of fried rice?! It looks yummy too!”

“I made it!” perked up uncle Jin “cooked it 20 mins ago in my backyard wok, so it’s fresh and can feed everyone.”

I leaned into Hoshi’s ear to whisper “You can see it from my bedroom window! It’s so cool and it’s just there in his backyard!”

“Please! Eat all the fried rice you want!” Jin said as he served us “get some now before the red haired one eats half of this mountain.”

I look over to the Bakugo-Kirishimas, the blonde one and my mom have the strangest friendship. But their hot headedness and crudeness mesh so well! As for the red haired one, he loves my mom’s cooking and ‘manliness’....whatever the fuck that means. Their kids, Elise and Katashi, are just mirrors of their parents and it scares me. Next to them are the Midoriyas, I love the mother, the father and the two boys... broccoli man and his brussel sprout boys. Then there’s Beizu and his mom, Mei. Mom and Mei worked on some things together in high school for the intel program, and when Mom started her company, she hired Mei. At first it was to help Mei get some employment has she was having trouble being a permanent anywhere. After a while and coming out with innovative gadgetry, mom kept her as her floor supervisor and creative. As for Beizu, he’s a month older than my brother and a very good friend to all. Mom says he’s like his father but he tragically passed away in an accident, I don’t remember much of him since I was so young. Mom doesn’t like talking about the accident, all I know is that his dad’s name was also Beizu and he was one of the first people Mom hired. In a weird twist, Mei and my aunty Mimi are cousins! Mimi’s mom was Mei’s aunt on her father’s side, making Beizu Mimi’s nephew! So he can say ‘aunt Mimi’ and it’s true...lucky him.

“Have some pickled beets boy!” aunty Mimi said as she served us “they go well with the meats.”

“Thanks aunty!” I chirped as she piled on the beets on my plate “I love her pickled beets!”

“It’s true! When she was just a babushka, she’d eat up all the beets and ask me for more” Mimi heartily laughed “now I make plenty so there’s enough to go around.”

“Oh? Thank you!” Hoshi said politely “It’s so weird being surrounded with families like this. You’re all interconnected in one way or another, makes me wish my dad wasn’t so gross to your mom so I could’ve had this with you.”

“Have what?” I asked as I flipped my meats.

“This quality time with friends and family” he reached for his meats to grill “growing up with you, it was just my brothers and dad for so long that I forget that most families have these things.” He smiled at me “I’m happy that you’ve included me, even if the circumstances aren’t the best right now.”

“Hey! Don’t sweat it!” I nudged him before reaching for my perfectly cooked meats “if my mom includes you, you’re family. That’s the highest honor my mom can give, plus she’s picky on who she considers family.”

“Would you two like a hard lemonade?” my mom offered us “since you two had your first drink already, you can have some at the Sunday yakiniku.”

“Yes please!” Hoshi and I chirped as we held our hands out for the drink.

“What? Since when?” Maru asked.

“Didn’t they tell you? They got invited to an intel kickback” mom answered as she opened the bottles for us “oh my baby is growing up so fast!”

“No fair! Elise and I have been trying to get invited to one since we started going to UA!” Maru complained “what did you guys do? Helped with their english homework?!”

“We just got a little too close to the marked grass and said I’m Agent 19 daughter” I shrugged “after that, they were nice to us and invited us to the kickback.”

“Yea, they call us the Royal Children” Hoshi snickered “good kids, they know how to host a party!”

“But we’re cooler!” Maru huffed

“No, I’M cooler” Elise was quick to correct “you’re that dude with hero merch everything, aka a NERD!”

“GOOD ONE ELISE!” Mom hollered and laughed.

“THAT’S MY GIRL!” Mr. Bakugo yelled proudly “they grow up so fast!”

“It’s okay son” Deku patted Maru on the head “you’ll get used to it.”

“Says the guy that had an All Might body pillow!” Mom roasted.

“Says the guy that almost named his son All Might!” Mr. Bakugo roasted, leaving no time to breathe.

“Says the girl that....umm” Deku tried to roast back.

“Please, just don’t Izuku” Dad sighed as he gave a firm chop “Ita won’t hesitate to annihilate you and you know how devastating those two are.”

“Just once! I want to have the upper-hand here” Deku sighed in defeat.

“You want a hug?” asked his wife with open arms.

“Yea” he nodded before hugging his wife “you don’t think my All Might body pillow is weird right?”

“Oh Izuku...I think it’s mega weird and kinda of wish it didn’t have to be on our bed” she roasted lightly “but it makes you so happy, so I tolerate it.”

“That’s true love right there” Hoshi commented “I don’t think I’ll be able to keep it together if my partner had a character pillow.”

“Same” I chimed in. Everyone was in the backyard for the most part, but Hoshi and I went to my room after we ate. I wanted to show him the giant wok in uncle Jin’s backyard but we caught a sight of something else. Maru and Elise were kissing in the side area under my window. “Wow, I knew they’d end up together.”

“Really?” whispered Hoshi.

“Yea, Elise always had a crush on Maru” I giggled “she just showed it in the form of teasing and aggressive affection, just like her hot-headed dad.” They were really going at it to the point that is was kind of not cute, so I looked away “very aggressive, but Elise is one of the girls I sort of clicked with. She’s really nice to me and acted like a big sister to me when the other boys were being jerks. We never fought over anything and I guess we just bonded over being the oldest.”

“She does seem like a nice person but that boy, he really babies you” Hoshi stepped away from the window “Like, he seems ideal and focused all his attention and energy on you, why don’t you like him?”

“To be honest, I don’t like people that don’t let me do my thing” I thought hard about my next sentence “it’s hard to explain, but I want to do things without being fussed over. I guess if I am considering dating, I want someone who’ll want to do all of my favorite things with me and won’t be possessive or act like a parent to me. I don’t belong to anybody and I don’t owe anybody anything!” The sound of my mother’s laugher from the backyard interrupted me “I want what my mom found in my dad, she did her thing as my dad supported her through everything. And my mom did the same for him, they’re two drastically different people and they took time to make it work.”

“I wish I knew how my parents dynamic was like” he sat on the bed “all I remember is how affectionate my mom was to my dad. They married then had my oldest brother the same year. He’d probably tell me more about it, I miss him.”

That made me think “How were things after your mom died? If you don’t mind sharing.”

“Things were a mess at first, it was hard on my dad to work and care for 3 kids. He’d lose his temper and just be stressed out all the time.” he sighed sadly “He wouldn’t know how to care for me, being so young and the only female in the house. His attitude toward me changed completely when my quirk appeared, I didn’t have toys or spent time playing with my brothers anymore. My dad replaced all that with training equipment and strict regimes. I think my dad did it as coping with the loss and being unable to manage the house the way he wanted it” he looked at my side table “it made him so happy that I had this perfected version of his quirk, like it was the light out of all this tragedy.”

“What about your brothers? Don’t they have quirks?”

“What? Didn’t I tell you?” His eyes lit up “WAIT I DIDN’T! I told Toei-kun! My brothers don’t have quirks. My mom is a third generation quirk inheritor, and with my dad, it’s not unlikely that their children would be quirkless.”

“No way! What’s you mom’s quirk?”

“She had Enhancement, she could strengthen or improve the quality/endurance of anything by just touching it” he smiled and laughed “I thought she was magic, she’d do the most before enhancing something, just to make me smile. Life was so fun and exciting with her, everyone loves her and her infectious smile... I wonder what she’d think of me now.”

I sat next to him “Well, she’d be proud of you. Because you managed to find and live your truth. And you made it this far in hero training, you made at least one friend and you’re safe...I’d say that’s something to be proud of!”

He ruffled my hair “Oh yea? Are you one of them?”     

“I hope so!” I laughed, relishing in his touch “I don’t let just anybody touch my hair.”

He look his hand off and I put it back “Silly! You like it when I mess up your hair?”

“Only you, nobody else!” I huffed as he resumed running his hand through my hair. I closed my eyes, fully blissed out on his touch and how it soft his fingers raked through my curly hair. I wonder if this is why dogs and cats like to get pet to the point of begging? My family just pets the robo doggy because they like to be treated like a house pet but they don’t feel anything. Mom says we can’t have a real dog because we won’t be emotionally prepared when the dog eventually gets old or gets sick and dies. My siblings and I started crying at the thought, so we never asked for a real pet ever again. Wait- why am I thinking about that? I open my eyes “hehe my mind wandered for a moment there.”

“It looks like it” he chuckled “you make the cutest faces when you’re in deep thought.”

Theres those feelings again! The rest of the night I rode on that compliment high, it made me a little self conscience if it was obvious. Luckily nobody asked.

“Hey Lili can I ask you a question?” blurted Oro the moment Hoshi got in the shower.

Oh crap “Uh sure, ask away.”

“Why are you sleeping with your friend in the guest room?” he asked “You have your own room.”

“Well, I-”

“Let me ask you something Tensei” mom butted in “where do you sleep when you have a friend sleepover?”

“With them- OH!” Oro facepalmed himself “geez I’m dumb and I was caught lackin’! Heh sorry for asking Lili.”

“It’s no big chief!” I pat his head and watch him walk to his room. I turn to mom “Thanks for swooping in mom.”

“No problem! I did the same thing you know” she responded as she put dishes away “I’m over protective of my friends, Mimi and Jin have shared a bed with me when I wasn’t in my best mental state to be left alone. And I’ve crawled into Jin’s bed to keep him from freezing to death a few times when we were in high school, I’ve cuddled with Mimi to sleep when she’d get heartbroken.” She closes the cabinet “you have the same type of caring nature, if you care, you REALLY care and you’ll express it.”

“I just really don’t want him to be alone” I put the serving bowls away “didn’t think of it like that.” I close the cabinet and stand up “But I like how you put it! It makes more sense than my big sister senses were tingling.”

Mom started laughing “I like that one better! You’re so funny Lili!”

I laughed with her but then I had an intrusive thought “Wait, mom...what are they going to do with us when we go back to school? He’s the victim and I called for help, that’s not basis for us to get punishment is it?”

Mom took a deep breath to refocus “I know for sure those assailants are going to be tried like adults and revoked of their hero licenses. In terms of you two, for a few months you’ll be under watch for any further attacks now that it’s public knowledge at Hoshi is trans and you fought on school ground in relation of the attack.” She turned around to give her complete attention “you two can’t leave without a chaperone and have to share a dorm for the rest of your dorm days.”

“What? We can’t go to downtown on free days?” I was crushed by this “and we have to share a dorm! Those rooms are already so small!”

“I know but I’m afraid the school is going to play the ‘bio gender’ card for that. Since the girls side is already filled and putting him alone on the next available floor is counter-productive” she put her hands on my shoulders “I proposed that you two share a room since you have to be monitored too plus, you’re friends so it was the easier choice.”

I got a little mad “When the fuck were you going to tell us this?!”

“On the way back to the school” she shamefully admitted “because I know you’d get mad and argue back.”

“Yes I’m mad! Mom what the fuck?!” I raised my voice “I love you but damn you really licked the boot on this one!”

“Mom licked the boot?” Iwa perked up from the living room couch.

“I heard something about a boot getting licked and that mom did it” Rosa said strolling down the stairs.

“Yo who’s boot got licked?” Oro teleported in.

Mom rubbed her forehead “I didn’t lick the boot!”

“She licked the school’s boot!” I screamed, the others gasped “and mom was going to tell me at the last possible second!”

“Oof with a stunt like that, sounds like boot licking activity” Iwa sneered “you thought you earned a ‘W’ but it’s just a big fat ‘L’!”

“It’s not an L for anyone!” Mom was fighting back.

“What’s going on here?!” Dad walked in from the backyard.

“MOM LICKED THE BOOT!” my siblings and I yelled as we pointed to our mom.

“Kids, stop picking on your mom” he sighed as he walked to my mom’s side “she always has the best interest at heart and fights the good fight. Be gracious that knows how to work the system or the system would’ve played you.” He picked up mom and slung her on his shoulder “Now if you don’t mind, everyone get ready for bed! The lot of you have school tomorrow, no more panic running to school so get to bed NOW!”

The younger ones scurried to their rooms, mom laughed “GOD I love it when you take control!”

“I know you do” he smacks her ass “come on love, you have to unwind and sleep early too.”

I watch the two walk up to their room and I gag a little “Ugh wish I could unsee that.”

“It was kinda of cute” Hoshi said at the archway of the hallway “your parents are serious couple goals.”

I agreed but it’s still cringe to look at. I did my nightly routine and crawled into bed with Hoshi, head on his un-bindered chest. His hand on the back of my head, stroking my hair, so comforting. I looked up at his face to see him looking straight up at the ceiling.

“What are you thinking about?”

“Hm? You’re not asleep yet?”

“Nah”

“Well, I’m thinking about how things are going to change now.”

“Like what?”

“Like how my secret isn’t a secret anymore. I’m sure everyone in class knows by now, can’t help but to think how they’ll treat me when we come back.”

“They can either accept you or be ignorant! I’d fight off transphobic people for you in heartbeat if they try it!”

“I’m so thankful for you Lili, you make it seem like I don’t have to go through life alone anymore.”

I heard him dose off to sleep and those words reached my soul. But how to describe this feeling? It’s different but it feels right...I should just shut off my brain and go to sleep, it’s 11pm!

-Chapter 9, End-

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[simonaj1804]

Oyasumi Punpun

I think this manga is one of the best exaamples of something which you shouldn’t judge by it’s literal cover. Seeing picture at the front I would’ve thought that it’s some story about some young girl and a weird penguin or bird thing. In regular manga, they often try to create likeable characters, plot that while  it may have many sad parts manages to rebound and go up at some points, and/or very unrealistic characters or settings. Oyasumi Punpun is basically opposite of all of that. 

Despite of it having comedy in the beginning (which was black humor anyway), Oyasumi Punpun os possibly one of the most depressing and realistic things I have ever come across. It is the “coming of age” story of a boy named Punyama Punpun, and follows him all the way from elementary school until around his early 20′s. What makes tis manga so special is the heavy psychological aspects surrounding Punpun and everyone else throughout the story. One of the main psychological aspects of the story has to do with Punpun’s character design. He, as well as his family, starat off looking like kind of 2 dimensional birds with long legs. His  design changes a lot later on to reflect how he is feeling on the inside, but the important thing is to remember is that he looks just slike a normal human being to everyone else in the manga and that he does not actually look like a “bird-thing” to them.

The story begins with Punpun in elementary school. The girl he had crush on has just transferred out of his school but shortly afterward a new girl named Tanaka Aiko transfers into his school. It’s love at first sight for Punpun. He starts  to slowly grow closer to Aiko while at the same time hanging out with friends and just being a normal boy who is entering puberty. Among his group of friends there are Shuntarou Harumi, a nice boy who wears glasses; Seki Masumi, a deliquent boy with family problems; Shimizu Koh, a strange boy who can see the “god of poop” and who has been friends with Seki since childhood. The group of about 6 boys in total is just average group of male friends who enjoy finding porn magazines, doing tests of courage, and spending their time just trying to enjoy themselves. Going further into the story would cause spoilers and since the story is quite long and detailed it would be for a long while. There’s just so many things that Asano Inio goes into amazing detail about in this dark and depressing story that explaining any more would ruin some part of it. The story covers a lot of time as I already mentioned and Punpun’s elementary school life is only a small, yet very crucial part of the entire plot.

Moving to the art, it’s simply amazing. The idea of making Punpun look different to the reader than to everyone else is great way to show his true emotions in a way that showing him as he realy looks could not. As for the other character designs they are all very well drawn, especially his family who also resemble 2D birds with long legs. The peoiple who look like normal humans are usually drawn normally but they can look ugly at times or beautiful at times when author wants to make them look similiar to how they are feeling. The manga is very mature and occasionally contains nudity, but it is never used as fanservice and is only used to increase darkness of situations and to expand on the imperfections of characters.

Characters themselves are possibly most interesting part of the manga. As I mentioned at the begfinning, these characters are not meant to all be likeable. In fact, none of them are my own favourite characters despite this being one of my favourite manga. That shouldn’t be the point though since they are not meant to be realistic. I would never consider myself or any of the people in my life one of my favourite characters if they were in an anime or manga. Real humans are not perfect, do not alwaays have a happy ending in life, and are usually just some unnoticable background character that you pass by once or twice during your life but leave no impact on you at all.

Punpun is an average Japanese person aside from the slightly inflated psychological issues at times. As a child his uncle taight him that id he said certain pharse, God would appear to him and help him in his time of need. Into depicts God like a bad imaginary friend who looks like a tanned guy with an afro and usually gives Punpun poor advice that is kind of like a “worst case scenario to do” rather than actual help. His journey to becoming an adult is a difficult one filled with family issues, romantic problems, sex, alcohol, depression, indifferent jobs, etc. The story is not a happy story at all, and Punpun never even goes one chapter without being sadm questioning himself, or making a bad decision at some point. He has many flaws and as he grows up, he starts to notice more and more of them. He is the kind of person who is always looking back into the past and has a hard time looking towards the future. With his kind of depressing life looking at his past is not the most enjoyable thing to do. He has a lot of regrets and things he wishes he could do differently if given the chance. As the story progresses further he falls more and more away from how he used to be as a cheerful child who dreamed of becoming a scientist in space. 

I wanted to involve this manga into my research as it’s one of the most realistic things I have read  so far considering that it’s a Japanese comic (manga). It puts the reader through a lot of pain especially if they relate to one of the characters and can cause depression episodes. For a book it makes people feel a lot and it I really like how we majority of time see everything from Punpun’s perspective and we see how he feels about things and how he thinks. It gives the reader a deep understanding what people actually go through or how they might feel in certain situations and how they will behave. Just like SUN Project from Mimi N, it something similiar that I would call like behind the scenes of real life. Showing the unlikeable aspects of life and emotions that people usually don’t speak up about because of how they might seem.

[ejdjjdjdjsjdjsjdjdjddj]

rant to get things off my chest

goddamn i feel so useless

hahaha

nice start huh omg im so funny lol

literally deadpanning rn

does that make me quirky

omg watch out wattpad jocks

anwyay been thinking a lot lately about the f u t u r e and all that. im terrified. ive been saying this for almost the past week but

i dont see it

i cant see my future

why cant i see it

im the type of person who reads the ending of a book before i decide to read it

i skip to the last episode to check if ill like the ending before i start a show

i always have to know what's going to happen so that i know its worth it.

how is it that the one thing thats mine to control, my life, is the only thing i have no control over.

why cant i see my future

why cant i picture myself happy with people around me that i care about and those who care about me

why cant i picture a family and a job and a steady income and a dream home

why dont i have a dream home

why dont i have any dream

why is there nothing i want so badly that i could die trying to get it

i want to be content in life but i dont even know what that looks like

part of me thinks that the reason i cant see my future is becuase i wont make ti that far and this is one last mercy.

i wonder if id rather be like this, without a dream, or with a dream i might never get to

i cant tell which is worse but when we're stuck in a ditch we only see our ditch and we cant wait to get out

what if next to my ditch there are only other ditches

what if leaving this ditch means falling into another and then another and then another

how do i find solid ground

where do i plant my feet to not keep sinking

this all sounds so dramatic but honestly

let it

im the only one who cares that thins point, which might be ironic cus the thing i care abt is the fact that ive stopped caring

im giving up

bit by bit

and this feels like the scariest thing ive ever done

giving up is so terrifying but i dont even knwo what the opposite is

right now, i feel like all ive ever done is give up

its what im best at because ive ever had anything to fight for

i want a life worth fighting for

if i ever right a book, ill probably write the epilouge before i write the first chapter

so that im excited to get to where i want to take the story

i wish i could do that with my life

i want to be excited about things

gosh i just want to live for the sake of living and without this heavy worthlessness about me

i take in deep breaths

i close my eyes

i pretend i can shut fof the world even if just for a seond

but then i have to breath out

open my eyes

and realize that there is nothing i want to see

[operawindow9-blog]

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Season 1 Episode 11 Review: Chapter Eleven: A Midwinter's Tale

Christmas has never been so sinister, with Chilling Adventures of Sabrina trying very hard to leave a mark this holiday season.

This successful special relied on the way that not much could be done without later having to fix it because this serves as a bridge between the upcoming second part of the show. 

During Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Season 1 Episode 11, Sabrina holds a seance to check why her mother was in limbo. She tells Madam Satan about this first though, allowing her to interfere in those plans while she waits to hear from the Dark Lord again.

Meanwhile, Susie gets a job at the mall that takes a deadly turn and Roz has to crack the case. And Harvey's relationship with Sabrina is further poked at when she starts to use magic more in their everyday interactions.

This leads to Harvey asking her to never use magic anywhere near him, causing a larger rift between them. Somewhere else, Zelda decides that their lives are too unsafe to include the baby in them. She has to give her away so that she isn't in constant danger.

"Chapter Eleven: A Midwinter's Tale," written by Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa and Donna Thorland, did a great spec script sort of storytelling. Knowing that this served as a fun adventure instead of an episode that pushed the boundaries of what we learned in Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Season 1 Episode 10 helped the holiday-themed special.  

The Christmas story benefitted from not worrying about the risks that should be taken, instead of telling a confined but not any less exciting tale set in between the past season and the future still yet to be told. 

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Review: A Burial and a Ressurection

Reintroducing Sabrina to Us

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Season 1 Episode 10 ended with Sabrina's faith almost up in the air. She wasn't herself, or at least not the version that we spent a whole season learning about.

So this Christmas special used the freedom that it had to create a bridge between that twist and the future of the character that we don't even know about.

Sabrina was still struggling with her choices, and yet thankfully she wasn't the exact opposite of who she was before. The idea of Sabrina becoming truly "evil" was a nice way to end a season, it wouldn't actually work as a drastic character change though.

Zelda: We’ll also have to hide Leticia while Gryla’s here, or she’ll try to take the babe and add Letty to her retinue. Sabrina: I can take her, Auntie. SHe's family now, and you've protected me all these years. It's the least I can do.

And this lightly prepared us for what the new normal would be for the show.

It was also obvious the way that there was almost a spec aspect to this special, digging into a story that wouldn't alter the timeline for the second part of the show when it returns.

This all could have happened offscreen and we wouldn't know the difference when we head into the second part next year.

Working with the limbo aspect was a good way to tread between the dark side that Sabrina was pushed into, while still sticking around in that light side of her that misses her mother and wants to know what happened.

Diana was executed well as a character, mostly because it was obvious how much she cared about Sabrina and yet you can't help questioning if that was even her.

Madam Satan was obviously messing around with her, so there is that constant question of if there was any moment we could trust.

This all morphed into two characters that were introduced just as quickly as they left, serving as a reminder that this story wasn't meant to last beyond that.

Dark Lord, as the longest night approaches, answer me. I did what you asked. Sabrina signed her name in your Book of the Beast. Why have you forsaken me? Why have you not called me home to the Pit? Has my mission changed? Say the word. Give my life meaning. Give me a sign.

Madam Satan

Everything had to be wrapped up by the time the next episode rolled around, not allowing it to take over the actual storyline that has to be coming.

It was the decision that Zelda made that was the most shocking because it really was life-changing.

Choosing to give the baby away was a little odd, it came off as if that was where Zelda's focus would now be. It gave her a different purpose on the show, one that didn't rely on Sabrina messing up or Father Blackwood in general.

Now she might still be harboring that secret but it won't be a constant thing that she has to look over her shoulder for.

That makes sense, if only because that constant will they find the baby question would get old fast.

But now what?

There is plenty of other things that Zelda could be involved in but it takes a second to comprehend that this significant connection might not matter as much anymore. 

The baby could come back around later, it might just be that now it didn't make sense to have a baby constantly on set because that is where Zelda would have to be confined.

The relationship between Zelda and Hilda is what would need more work, and perhaps that is what will be brought back.

It all depends on what Sabrina will be struggling against. it can't be the Dark Lord again because he has gone dark. The idea of the dark vs. the light though is still present and Sabrina isn't happy with where she ended up.

Remember, the Yule log is not a decoration, it is a protection. It must burn continuously from now, through the shortest day, through the longest night, until dawn. Otherwise, Satan knows what malevolent forces might come down our chimney. Creatures with perhaps deadly intentions.

Zelda

Giving up this much control isn't her idea of her future, so this might be where she draws the line and pushes back to have more of that grip on which decisions she gets to make for herself.

Obviously, she will make mistakes, but there has to be that strong thing that she is chasing.

Chances are her aunts might not support it as much, thus creating conflict that puts Zelda on a path again where she is doing something instead of waiting for someone else to do it so she could be added into the mix. 

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Review: A Feast of an Exorcism

The Mortal Side of the Story

Diving right in, with the way the finale ended, it felt like Sabrina had completely removed herself from her friends.

Maybe it stood out that way only to me, but it came off as if Sabrina changed significantly enough to submerge herself in this new life.

It was actually necessary to show us that it isn't true at all, she hasn't abandoned her old life like maybe that shocking ending led us to believe. It again defines Sabrina better, not letting her just shift to the next extreme when she worked so well as a bridge between the two worlds.

But please don't ever do that again. Use magic with me. Or on me, or near me. Never again.

Harvey

But it can still pave the way for her to stray more towards her witch side, especially if this was a way to show us how little her friends are coming around to her new normal.

Susie probably is the most understanding, and that is only because they got taken so they continuously are aware of how magic plays a part in Greendale.

But then you have Harvey, a guy who rightfully so is wary. What didn't make as much sense was how much of a step back he took when it came to Sabrina and magic.

The way that he still wanted them to be together after he found out, that made it seem as if he was coming around at least to the idea of Sabrina and her magic.

Now it is like we took a few steps back, he is uncomfortable from the start and even takes what she wanted to do for him to better his life as a sign that he can't interact with any of her magic.

It just felt odd because their relationship wasn't in this exact place, in fact, it felt like there was more hope from Harvey's side. If anything it was Sabrina that struggled because she was worried what harm she could cause him.

The same disconnect came across with Roz, someone who should know better than anyone the way that something can be useful but can't be explained.

Roz has her own visions and an awareness that is not in any way mortal, so the way that she couldn't see herself truly understanding Sabrina's life also stood out in a strange way.

It just felt like no one was really talking to each other, which is exactly what they used to do. They even spoke more before the special so it set a scene about where Sabrina might end up when the show truly returns.

If everyone is keeping such a safe distance from her and her magic, there are already those signs that she will feel more comfortable going to the Weird Sisters or Nick or someone else.

What’s happened? Did the Grinch get to you? Or the Dark Lord, perhaps?

Ambrose

It has to be done to move the story along and show the shift that Sabrina feels, and yet it will take a second to adjust to. It was like we knew where things were headed, so changing up how Roz and Harvey fell into things is a change.

But this opens up the door for Sabrina's friends to no longer be labeled as such. If there is distance, then they will have that time to focus on themselves and their dynamics with one another when Sabrina isn't around.

There is even a hint of Roz and Harvey possibly exploring a relationship together and I am here for it. 

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Stray Thoughts

There is still something suspicious about Luke. It feels like a lot goes unsaid about his life, and yet his relationship with Ambrose is most of what we see when those two are on screen. And maybe that is the issue, it feels like Ambrose deserved more of a storyline and he got it, but then it feels tied to Luke in a strange way.

All signs lead back to Luke and if there isn't something shifty going on that was hinted at with the death of his ex, then what is the point? Ambrose would definitely deserve better because he just isn't worth the minimal screentime that he gets lately. 

As always this is a request for more Prudence and the Weird Sisters, although it was quite a surprise to see the role they got to play in general.

So was everything that we saw of Diana fake? It was heavily hinted that Madam Satan was going to mess with the seance, so trusting Sabrina's mother was a warning sign from the beginning. But there are still moments where I wonder if some of it was actually her. Like that beginning portion where she mentions the idea of not being safe.

Nick wasn't in this episode. I was very fine with that.

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina always manages to take a holiday and leave a different view of it in our minds afterward. This time around was exactly that and I didn't mind it one bit.

Am I the only one that was really intrigued by the limbo story? It randomly appeared as more of a shock than an arc, but that environment was very intriguing because there was so much we didn't know about it. If anything, I would love to see that explored again at some point, maybe even with Sabrina's mother involved.

Because it is obvious that her mother and father didn't die in a plane crash, but we keep circulating around that massive hint without making much movement in any direction. If Madam Satan thought the Dark Lord was sending her a sign by asking her to stop Sabrina from finding out the truth, it is probably safe to guess that he was somehow involved?

Does everyone know though?

What did you think of the Christmas special? 

Was Harvey right when he gave back those pencils to Sabrina? Does it make sense that all of Sabrina's friends are still struggling with that witch revelation? Where do you see things going next?

What do you think of the sneak peek we got of the new Sabrina? Does this set up for the more adventurous side that she seems to take on in the trailer for the second part of the show?

What else would you like to see more of? What else do you want to see less of? Let us know what you think below. 

Don't forget that you can watch Chilling Adventures of Sabrina online, right here on TV Fanatic! The next part of the show will premiere April 5, 2019. 

Yana Grebenyuk is a staff writer for TV Fanatic. Follow her on Twitter.

Source: https://www.tvfanatic.com/2018/12/chilling-adventures-of-sabrina-season-1-episode-11-review-chapte/