#a lot o f rambling im warning u

[emerssn-blog1]

hey fam !!! it me hanna & this is my new son (but more accurately fATHER) emerson !! i’m honestly so hyped to play him so hmu for plots :~~~) pls :~)

i’m not the only one who just saw milo ventimiglia walk by, right ? oh, wait, that was emerson beckett. i don’t know much about them besides that they’re thirty two years old and moved into golden horizons six years ago. everyone calls them the recluse because they’re reticent and solitary, but also altruistic and adroit. i’ve also heard he is currently a coffee shop owner and identifies as cis male.

k so this is emerson!!! he was born in a rly rly small town in georgia into a really big family!! edit: he was born on a farm this is an important detail otherwise none of thise makes sense lmao

im talkin big like .. he had six other siblings & he lived with many of his other relatives as well

he basically grew up in a very small gated neighbourhood - the kind where u go to school with the exact same small group of kids every year, u know all of ur neighbours stories and their parents know u and everyone’s just pals nd practically family

from a young age, emerson rly rly loved school strangely?? his family never considered it that much of a priority but emerson genuinely loved it and learned very quickly!! he read things on his own (anything he could get his hands on), lit knew the most useless random facts and would go around sharing them and yea sdjfjfsd he was a nerd since early on 

he was always interested in learning. for the rest of his family, after high school, it meant they were gonna continue working on the farm & carry on w what their parents do. but emerson wanted to venture out...learn more abt the rest of the world...

emerson finished his schooling quickly & graduated when he was 17 !! he wanted to go to university and move to the city and make his dreams of becoming a vet come true but his parents...disapproved 

so he stayed for another yr and planned on moving out on his own when he was 18!! 

another detail to note tho was that from childhood, he met the Ultimate Love of his Life. her name was savannah !! 

anyways she dreamed of moving to the city too?? it was always a thing of theirs to leave together nd live together it was very hopeful but yanno they didn’t know any better

when he was 18, sav and emerson moved to nyc !! emerson wanted to study biology nd she wanted to become an actress :-) his parents were still very much opposed but they supported him financially in regards to tuition, bc they highly doubted he’d last for very long

they were right , it was hella difficult ?? they didn’t help him out very much w money besides tuition so he was working a lot while studying

it wasn’t an ideal situation but he still got to live in the city, with his gf, and it was hard but he refused to prove his parents right?? so he stayed and worked rly rly hard but slowly his parents stopped financially supporting him as they gradually realized his choice was final

when he was in his 3rd yr of uni tho sav became pregnant .. so emerson naturally came to the conclusion that they can’t afford for him to go to school when he’s gotta work to support them & their baby so he dropped out rip

yea so now he’s working even MORE and it’s stressful and they can barely pay bills or do ... anything really

so even after the baby was born, they lived paycheck to paycheck. emerson never really bothered telling his family about his situation tbh

when their kid ( her name is theadora aka thea !! ) was four years old tho, savannah died after bein involved in a nasty car accident :( it was obviously very hard on both thea and emerson

in need of a fresh start, emerson moved to sf. he was still broke tho lol 

so yea !! he moved into golden horizons w thea and started workin in a coffee shop. over the yrs, he moved up positions & got highkey close w the owner but as the owner passed away 2 yrs ago, he was given the shop nd still runs it today!!

now its lowkey a mix of a coffee shop & a cheap book shop/library?? he collects all his faves heh

in general he’s still .. a pretty upbeat person he’s just a lil worn out bc life was....definitely not everything he ever dreamed of being and he’s sort of had to settle because of what was given to him but !! he isn’t like super emo about it u know he doesn’t like to think about it too much

he loves bein in the city but at heart is still a southern boy?? rly old fashioned bad w technology loves the outdoors loves nature and animals all that good stuff

he’s so sefless like he feels so guilty if he does something for himself?? esp after having a kid and even after living on his own w sav, he’s used to giving up stuff and making sacrifices for other people so ,, he just feels like someone else deserves help more than him?? someone gotta remind him to take care of himself too

tbh emerson has a lot of surface lvl relationships but not a lot of super deep ones just bc he’s so bad at maintaining relationships and unless someone initiates it then he hates making the first move bc he feels awkward and like he’s bein annoying 

but if he loves u he will stick with u no matter WHAT ,, for real

probs seems annoyed sometimes but rly he’s just in his thoughts too much nd in actuality is very nice !! 

literally carries around snacks everywhere just in case also probs hands out water bottles .. he is everyones dad ok

possible connections!!

any ex plot tbh but specifically, ex-fiance or ex- very very serious relationship?? i could see them having gotten into the relationship a few months or so after emerson moved to sf ( or anytime, really ) and things got pretty Real but in the end emerson wasn’t prepared to go all the way and ended things

ride or die - i live for brotps!!!! or any bff plots!!!!! give me all of them!!!!

friends w benefits?? emerson’s never gonna put a label on it and maybe ur muse feels the same way so for now they’re just foolin around ,, havin fun

like a lil sibling sort of?? just someone that emerson’s super protective of bc he’s the ultimate dad friend tbh. let him be ur designated driver for when ur drunk & lecture u on making responsible decisions

if ur neighbours with this boi hit me up

if ur chara lived in ny back in the day then maybe they were also really good pals with his ex gf aka the mother of his child?? that would be interesting bc emerson is still really attached

his bad influence ~~ the one that convinces him 2 take one night for himself, make dumb choices nd wake up the next morning not remembering anything!!

JUST PLOT WITH ME THX

[hongism]

Do you have any good ateez X reader fanfics Recs? I’m in need of a good long fanfic If not long Then a really really good one lol I just have a hard time finding some lol

BOY HOWDY IM FINALLY HERE okay but fr tho i’m sorry this took me Lightyears to do im so bad at remembering what fics i read and how i tag them so i lost my mind while trying to find them all and i’m sure i missed a lot of favs so i Apologize in advance asiodjfosijdf some are kinda popular so you might have seen them before but some do not get the credit they deserve and i could sit here and sing the praises of these fics and their authors for years but i won’t put y’all through that ._.

You can’t even reach my neck - @kpopscenario - seonghwa

summary: They’re best friends and have feelings for each other but they both don’t know about the others crush, Seonghwa comforts her after another bad date. (Basically friends to lovers college!au)

yes i am a Sucker for a damn f2l college au on occasion and this is one of those Incredible and Well Written occasions i love this fic and the length is perfect and long in the best way 10/10 would recommend and it’s great

such a good girl for me - @starrychannies - mingi

summary: no summary but the warnings should tell you Everything you need to know wink wonk skljdlkdfj

warnings: harddom!mingi, sub!reader, size kink (its mingi duh), choking, sir kink, pet names, mix of praise and degradation, oral (receiving), unprotected sex, slight overstim, slight humiliation (?), a lot of fluffy aftercare.

i find it Uber hard to write smut that is well written in all honesty like i can’t read my own smut bc i can’t Stand It i just think it’s awful but there are so so many authors out there who can write smut and write it well and i admire starrychannies so much for such incredible writing talent with smut yesyes

Alone - @actuallythatwaspromise - san

summary: again n/a but good lord royalty au prince san, princess reader, smack me over the head because i really adore this 2.2k fic and good lord this fic gets me emo and i dont even know why??? the angst is soft and barely there but i’m still over here sobbing for no reason oisdfoaijdiof

detention - @/starrychannies - wooyoung

warnings: badboy!wooyoung, goodgirl!reader, smut, voice kink, corruption kink, fingering, dirty talk, public sex, exhibitionism kink, wooyoung has piercings and reader is a Big Fan, mention of gags, light degradation.

this, this shit right here, this is so good WHEW i dont really have the words but hot damn, i just love this fic and i love love love the way the author wrote the the fic and it’s Hot:tm:

violet roses - @/starrychannies - yunho

warnings: F L U F F, college!au, s2l, first meeting, yunho is a soft babie, yunhos pov!!, love at first sight, pining, bit of slow burn, yunho is Whipped, suggestive teasing, hyunjin is mentioned briefly in the beginning, protective yunho, mingi makes an appearance, mentioned that mingi’s gay, san is mentioned, smut, softdom!yunho, sub!reader, praise, car sex, SIZE KINK!!!!, vaginal penetration, fingering, finger riding, penetrative sex, daddy kink, yunho lowkey has a corruption kink, multiple orgasms.

did i die? yes but only a lot. ahhhh i LOVE me some damn s2l slow burn and pining that shit hits the spot and this fic has it wrapped up in a nice and lovely package pls read pls pls pls read

lover boys - @/starrychannies - seonghwa + hyunjin

warnings: smut, wet dreams, poly relationship, boy x boy, non idol verse, ateez x skz crossover (yay!), harddom!seonghwa, softdom!hyunjin, sub!reader, threesome, reader is Needy, hyunjin is Sleepy, seonghwa is Amused, pwp, light somniphilia, dirty talk, petnames, some degradation, early morning sex, oral (giving), throat fucking, reader has no gag reflex and hyunjin is In Love with it, fingering (receiving), spanking (like twice), unprotected sex, light cum play, cum swallowing, little bit of praise, cuddles!

i really just need a minute whenever i think about this fic bc i highkey die every time i think about it??? two of my ults??? i can’t??? i really can’t handle this honestly like woW osdijfoijdfoi the way i melted we love to see it 🤩

entanglement - @sanduction - wooyoung

summary: when the boy who had explicitly spelled out his implausible hatred towards you on every possible occasion tells you that he’s a dog, who would’ve guessed that you possessed the other half of his soul? not you, at least. life sure had a shit-load of guts to pull a twilight on you like that.

okay so deadass if you know me you know that i really am not the type to read werewolf/hybrid fics. i just typically don’t go for them or read them but this fic. this fic. oh my god. the way it’s so seamless and works so perfectly, i’ll never recover like W O W i love this fic that is all honestly i have mad respect for all writers who do werewolf/hybrid fics bc i can’t write them at all, so sanduction huge major props to you i love your work!!!

who catches the alpha? - @teeztheflag - hongjoong

summary:  „You don’t want to break the rules, am I right?“

aka another phenomenal werewolf fic with alpha hongjoong that made me fall over in a totally great way. the angst the fluff the little suggestive bits it all flowed and fit together perfectly and i am still in love with this fic no matter how much time passes

bite me - @atinyidea - yunho

summary: vampire!au, vampire!yunho, vampire!reader, female!reader established!relationship / warnings! angry s*x?, biting, blood, sir k*nk, consensual s*x, teasing, begging, rough play, overstimulation

this fic is ~spicy~ and whew it is good wow just the idea of yunho and reader being immortal together was like awww then it got spicy and i went to o_o real quick but it is such a good fic and wow i love it i dont even have words bc im Dumb but wow

You Got It Like That? - @kimnamshiks - wooyoung

summary: You just needed to get through this week at the resort at the hands of 20 coworkers and Wooyoung; the Sales Department Supervisor who got some raunchy photos of you the day prior.

honestly wow sodifjoisdjf i love this fic so much i just wow honestly the reader is a whole mood when wooyoung texts about the pictures and i was reading like ‘ahahaa me.’ oisjdfoij god the back and forth between wooyoung and the reader just had me rolling legit i got flustered like pls wooyoung just HAAHHAHA WOOYOUNG IN THIS FIC GETS ME FLUSTERED AS FUCK it is all because tay is a Stellar Writer and makes those emotions come to life in amazing ways and i’ll never ever get over it just whew banter in fics is legit one of my favorite things ever and tay does it with such beautiful ease that i am Enamored but i am also Rambling just pls read this fic oh my god it’s so good

be my neighbor - @jeonginks - seonghwa

summary: seonghwa moved into the apartment next to yours, and he stumbled into a situation he didn’t expect to face.

wow i l o v e this fic it’s just a perfect blend of angst and fluff and it sends me to space every time i read it soidfjoidjf don’t ask why space but it just does i kinda ascend okay? anyway wow this fic is such a gem and it is sO underrated in my opinion. the dialogue is written so beautifully and with an ease that i think is often times hard to capture?? wow just amazing

Cheat Codes - @serendipityunho - seonghwa

summary: “This party’s boring, wanna get out of here?”, may have perhaps led you to make the biggest mistake of your life by sleeping with your best friend’s other best friend, your best friend who happens to be in love with you.

me: wow i never read college aus hahhaa

also me: reads a shit ton of college aus sodifjodijf

honestly this fic is 100% fantastic from start to finish, it’s 5.3k of pure greatness and i just really love this fic altho my heart broke at the end it still fit perfectly and was amazingly written ;-;

that is all i have for today slkdfljdlk however i will be shameless and say that if you would like some Long Bois for ateez i have a few but i’ll link the fics i loved writing the most and am v proud of :3

storge - mingi

liquorice and ivories - hongjoong

[hobiwonder]

Adventures of a closeted exhibitionist | 01 (m)

Pairing: hoseok x reader, f2l (future)

Genre: do i ever write anything other than smut

Words: 3k

Warnings: exhibitionism lol, hoseok is a FREAK freak, oral (f receiving), dirty talk.

Summary: where hoseok explores with his bff. i hope u like it pls validate me. 

a/n: this is an idea I pitched to @parkmuse​ and she n i were going to collab but then she got a cat and DITCHED ME (jeepers is v cute ngl). so instead of a full length one shot, im gunna make this a series. like a small one lol. this is unedited beyond microsoft putting the annoying red lines to tell me im illiterate. 

~~

It was roughly 9pm. Despite it being a Friday night, there were a fair few people still drifting about in the 24 hour library. This time of the semester being closer to the exam time you guess this isn’t such an atypical incidence. What was rare though, was you being here. On a Friday night. Where you’re usually getting shit-faced with your friends at Park Jimin’s weekly parties. Not here with your best friend Hoseok – who frequented the place more than you, actually – about to have sex with him. Yup. You heard right.

“Can you walk faster y/n? We’ll lose our spot!” His hurried whisper didn’t do much to mask and the nervous tremble in his voice. It was obvious your best friend wasn’t very adventurous and thus here you were, helping him out.

Slightly regretting your decision. This place was more crowded than you thought. You run forward to catch up with Hoseok’s long legs that kept weaving through the massive bookshelves with ease. Whereas if you were here by yourself – you’d certainly be lost.

“We won’t with the speed you are walking. Slow down, Hoseok.” Grumbling under your breath as you see no sign of him stopping to let you remember the way you guys had come to this part of the quiet library, you just opt to following him around like a lost puppy. Usually it’s the other way around.

Especially when Hoseok had asked you one day to try public sex with him.

“Well well well, never knew my reclusive best friend was such an exhibitionist.” You’d been whistling and hooting while smirking his way, watching him shuffle on his feet awkwardly. He was never too confident in speaking about his sex life and watching him squirm was so much fun to the evil part of your brain. Not that he had much of a sex life to expose. Hosoek was a sweet boy who did relationships. Long term ones. And he hadn’t even been on a date recently.

“W-Well, I’m not. Not yet. I’ve never tried anything like that. And you obviously have.”

You’d just shrugged nonchalantly in response.

“So… I want to try something. With you.” Naturally, your response had been to blink repeatedly, making sure you heard him right.

“No fucking way, Josè.”

“Please, please, please?! I don’t trust anyone other than you to do this with and not be weird about it.”

“What about you get an actual girlfriend Hobi? Hm? Ever thought of that.” He’d rubbed his temple with a pout on his face when you’d mockingly knocked your fingers against it. How did he not see how attractive he was? He could get anyone. Literally anyone.

“I haven’t had luck in that department, you know that.” Him gritting his answer through his teeth is probably one of the most frustrated you’d seen him and it makes you snort.

“Then just find someone willing and fuck her at the party?” The crude words bring a blush to his pretty face. How does he even plan on having sex in public?

“You know I can’t do that.” Shaking his head, he turns back towards you, “Besides… I don’t want it to be just anywhere. I want to d-do this at the library.” Your eyes had bugged out of your head once again at that. How did you not know how kinky your best friend was?

“Oh my god.” You can’t help the giggles that fight their way through your throat, “I cannot believe it Hoseok! You’re such a closeted freak.” Now you were full on cackling.

“Stop. I just wanted to try something.” The pout was back on his face and the little glazed look he had in his eyes had diminished slightly.

“Yeah and public sex from the get go? What will you be ‘trying’ next? Pegging and Anal?”

His brows furrow adorably. “What’s pegging?”

“Oookay. Let’s just get back to the topic at hand.” You didn’t want to give him any more ideas. Yet.

Somehow in the next few hours, you’d agreed to sleep with your best friend. At a library at that.

And here you were, nestled in a corner at one of the desks that were set up between the isles for people who wanted to browse journals and other various literature. Where you both sat was relatively isolated. Only the people who occasionally walked past the isles would be able to see two people sitting at a table – the table shielding your lower halves of the body – and only if they looked. The table was set against one of the isles and that would probably be the only concerning area. That someone on the other side of that shelf would be able to decipher what was going on. Okay maybe this was making you rethink your decision. Just a little.

“So, what do you think?” Hoseok was panting slightly as he looked around you both repeatedly, making sure no one was lingering on the fact that two students had disappeared off to a section that they could do more than study in. But you couldn’t see anything of the sort. Just everyone minding their own business for now. Besides, how loud could you both be anyway? This shouldn’t take too long.

“Pretty good. You must come here a lot to know such a precise spot?” Brows wagging teasingly in his direction, making his cheeks flare up even more.

“I do. But to study usually so this feels a bit… exhilarating.” His face tells you how excited he is but he is definitely nervous as well if the sweating is anything to go by.

You bump your shoulder slightly with his to ease his worries. “Hey, don’t sweat it. Literally.” You can’t help the laugh that he then tries to muffle with his hand. “No really! I’m very good at quickies.”

Your wink makes him blush but he still seems apprehensive. “It’s not that… I’m. Well. I-I can kind of lose control sometimes.”

You continue to deadpan him. Hoseok and losing control? Were you hearing correctly? Your sweet, nerdy, studious, calm and collected, shy best friend losing control? It can’t be that bad, right?

“I’m serious y/n. B-But I’ll try to keep in check.”

“…Okay. Anyway. You ready?” There is a moment of silence and it is quiet. You can hear when Hoseok swallows, the way he drags his gaze all over your coat cladded form and then finally, looks into your eyes. You never noticed how attractive Hoseok was up-close and that was what was making you nervous.

“I-I think so? How are we going to do this? Shit I didn’t think about the logistics through before coming here.” Hoseok had started to nervous ramble so you decided to take matters into your hand by sitting directly on his lap, facing him.

“W-Wha…. Is this how we’re- Wouldn’t that look too suspicious.” You tried not to roll your eyes.

“We’re about to screw in a library surrounded by people. Anything we do will make us look like horny college kids. At least this way if someone catches us people will think we’re only making out or something.”

Hoseok’s pretty mouth falls open in an ‘o’ understanding your reasoning. The law library is more dimly lit compared to others so it was easier to fly under the radar. It was obvious that Hoseok had brought you here to take full advantage of that. If Hoseok tends to lose control as he's said, it shouldn't attract too much attention even if he's a tad too loud. Wait, is it even about his volume?

Leaning down you level your face to his baby browns while he leans back as if you're infectious and not about to have sex, "What do you mean about lose control by the way? You're not going to scream up a storm are you? I swear to god Hoseok if you get us arrested-"

"It's not me you should be worried about," the reply comes without any stutters unlike how he spoke before, making your breath hitch. He's calm and collected, gaze slithering down your body like you were an otherworldly marvel.

This was not how you'd seen your best friend act in all the years you'd known him. Never have you felt this attracted to your usually shy, meek friend who seemed to be the most quaint person in your group of friends. Perhaps that's why you'd never really sexualised him before. Though it did always baffle you how he managed to date the prettiest girls.

"Okay weirdo."

The tremble in your voice is barely masked but you try and regain some of your composure by aggressively adjusting and slipping down your panties to mid thigh. Effectively breaking Hoseok's bravado when he audibly gulps, looking around him. It doesn't take long for you to feel the effects of your activities as Hoseok already feels considerably solid underneath you. A flush of embarrassment evident in your cheeks when he rubs the damp material of your panties between his index finger and thumb.

"You're so wet, y/n." The skin of your naked thighs covered in goosebumps with each carrels of Hoseok's veiny hands. When did they get so callous? The feeling brought another embarrassing amount of wetness down your thighs.

"S-Sorry." You shook your own head at your apology. Why did you say sorry? Guys love that, you knew.

Somehow, it felt different with Hoseok. You were being a lot more conscious about his likes and dislikes instead of your own. Which should've been a red flag. Yet, you continued with the dangerous game you were both playing. The perspiration on Hoseok's forehead gave away how affected he was as well despite the cool temperature inside the library.

"Are you kidding? I've... I've never been this turned on in my whole life."

You don't get a chance to respond, only garbled gasps when his cool fingers slip between your thighs, massaging the slick in the sensitive skin that connected your inner thighs to your pussy.

"H-Hoseok." His thumbs spread the wetness from your nether lips back to the sensitive patch of skin.

"Is this okay?" You're too caught up in the heat of the moment and the thousands of nerve endings that Hoseok's fingers were stimulating.

Your head was lolling around like you were drunk and that was enough indication for him to carry on. It was terrifying how little he had done and you were already lacking the ability to comprehend anything other than his touch. Your hands were dropping beneath you carelessly, trying to find the hard length that was persistently pressing in you. You were turned on beyond belief and you needed to feel Hoseok inside you. Now.

Hoseok had other plans.

"Slow down, y/n." His chuckle is breezy, albeit a little throatier than usual. But it doesn't stop your quest to get your hands inside his pants.

"Hoseok I need you to get inside me." Your plan to be stern backfires.

You had hoped that telling Hoseok you meant business would get him to submit to you like it usually does. However, the heady look in his eyes tells you otherwise. You're proven wrong when instead, Hoseok locks his eyes with yours, as if challenging the autonomy you had in this situation. You're unable to move, just feel as the plunge of his nimble fingers inside you has you gripping his shoulders for a lifeline. Your head was already mushy and all basic comprehension had gone out the door. The sounds accompanying each agonising push and pull extremely erotic, making the blush bloom deeper on your already heated skin.

The onslaught of sensations had made it easy to forget about the world around you. If someone was to catch you right now, you weren't sure if you would let Hoseok stop the delicious friction inside you. The way he looked at his fingers sliding their rhythm inside you, completely entranced by your body, made another gush of wetness flow down his thrusting digits. He had barely fingered you for five minutes and you were already like a full damn ready to burst. Hoseok finally looked up when the scissoring motion of his fingers made you gasp loud enough to startle him.

it was getting increasingly difficult to keep your volume down. Now you knew why Hoseok had redirected the question about being quiet, to you. His other hands wrapped around your hips, just above the dip in your spine to keep you from thrashing off his lap. You were at the point where your body was so close that every thrust of his wrist bordered on pushing you over the edge. Body moving towards the movement and away from it in the same second.

“I don’t think I want that just yet.” His lips shone from the constant contact with his tongue.

Maybe he was giving you a tongue show on purpose. To be even more cruel when you were already suffering (in the best way possible). Hoseok was always mischievous. Not as obvious as your other friends like Taehyung or Jungkook. And you were finding out just how devious he is. Dragging on the assault on your pussy. Stretching the thread until you’re clawing your hands down his back, whispering ‘please’ like a symphony.

“You like this?”

“Y-Yes Hoseok. Please just f-fuck me already.” Your threatening growl only makes him smirk and fasten the pace of the three fingers inside you.

“I really wanna watch you squirt y/n. With all these people just a few feet away. Can you do that for me?”

His whispers near your ear makes you flinch away with each word. Body so sensitive to any form of stimulation that you were scared you were going to cum just from listening to the low timbre of his voice. Hoseok’s eyes were glazed over, the hard insistent bulge was digging in your thighs with even more ferocity. Yet, he denied himself the pleasure you were so readily offering. Why was he torturing the both of you like this, ugh.

Suddenly, he pushes you back against the table behind you, making you grasp the wooden edges in order to brace yourself. However, the action left you exposed, skirt pushed up enough to reveal Hoseok’s hands rhythmically pushing forward and backwards. The open position of your thighs and the air now touching your heated skin making you feel everything just a bit more. His fingers were hitting the spongy spot on the top of your walls just right that you’re whimpering and clenching your hands around the wood, just not the type you wanted to be holding.

“F-Fuck Hoseok if w-we get caught p-people-”

“Will see your cunt swallowing my fingers? I know y/n.” His smile is devilish. He’s reveling in your fear of being found out and you know this is exactly what his fantasy is.

Your breathing is harsh and you’re bordering on being a little too loud. It becomes even more of a problem when you start feeling the zaps of pleasure in your core that are hurtling you towards completion. Hoseok’s angled fingers repeat the motions that elicited the response when he sees you thrashing.

“Right there huh? That feel good?”

You can’t speak. Biting so hard on your lip, trying to not scream blooding murder, that tears are pooling in your eyes, blurring your vision. The strength in your arms leaves as you collapse on the table, head pushing back and one hand going to hold the one almost fisting inside you. You’re so close you can almost taste it. Everything is too much and it’s an impossible feat to stay quiet and inconspicuous.

“God, you’re being so loud. If you’re any louder people will hear you cumming all the way from outside.” And yet he doesn’t sound concerned.

Hoseok’s eyes are feral, watching you hold on to his hand while his wrist is snapping powerfully towards that one spot that has you seeing spots. You’re moaning even louder now and he has to get up from his seat to put his other hand around your mouth to drown out your sounds that are going straight to his dick. God, you were so sexy he was going to cum in his pants from just watching the tears roll down the side of your face.

“Yeah? You’re gunna cum baby? Squirt all over my fingers?”

He wasn’t expecting a response from you with how fucked out you were but your eyes peering into his let him know that you heard him. And that you were going to cum. Hoseok slips his thumb up to your clit, rolling it in tandem with his deep thrusts and within seconds, you’re screaming out your orgasm. Your cunt grabbing his fingers like a vice but Hoseok is still dragging his digits along your walls to prolong the pleasure. His whole hand is thoroughly wet because you indeed, squirted like he asked.

It’s hard to comprehend if what you experienced was a fever dream or you actually blacked out for a few seconds because of how hard you came. You’re still breathing hard and you feel hoseok’s hand ease around your mouth. He’s pressing kisses along your decolletage, fingers till lazily moving inside you until you’re pushing them away.

“That was so hot. Thank you y/n, you’re the best.” You were getting whiplash from how he’d turned back into his sickly sweet self when he was just giving you the best orgasm of your life a few minutes ago.

“Yeah, w-well, I may not be able to walk out of here.” you can’t quite look him in the eyes yet. Not when he’d just fucked your brains out and real fucking was about to come.

“Don’t worry, I think you’ve had enough today so that’s for next time.” He smiles his 1000 watt smile at you before sucking the wetness off his fingers. Your face is so red you might pass out.

Next time?

[crystu-cii]

XDD

I f e e l that pain in my soul-- my older sister uses cologne sometimes and it is sO STRONG AND WILL NOT STAY CONFINED TO HER ROOM-- AMD SOMETIMES SHED DO IT IN THE DOORWAY LIKE HELLO-- XDD

YEAH WH GET SOME SLEEP LEAVE THE STAYING UP TO US-- XDD

YES BABY JAIL, INTO THE UPSIDE DOWN LAUNDRY BASKET YOU KNIFE-WIELDING HEATHEN-- XDD oms XDD well I don't know them but I love them- YESSS THEYRE SO FLUFFY-- I'm actually curious what images pop up first imma check-- FLUFFY PUPPIES-- we've actually never owned ones that fluffy(those actually look more similar to shetland sheepdogs than the shelties we've had so far?? Very similar/similar enough where if someone doesn't know a sheltie we mention shetland sheepdogs), our current one is a purebred that we got for free(she was being given away bc her family never came back for her and the lady taking care of her couldn't afford the time to take care of a second dog long-term think) and she's got pretty short fur in comparison- still fluffy enough, but not quite so long of fur-- she's a blue merle(absolutely gorgeous fur, she's like 8 now with a lot of health problems but she's super loving still 💕💞) anyways about the fur, so long as you brush regularly you should mitigate most of that, and it mostly collects in corners- but like.. be prepared to eat and wear dog fur for the rest of your life-- (actually there's a thing called a fur zapper we bought recent that you put in with your clothes when you wash/dry them(I think it's dry but idk??) that's supposed to get a lot of hair off your clothes in that process? Also lint rollers are your best friend--) AND roombas are really helpful(we bought a knockoff one and rarely have to sweep ever so 👀) XDD WHEEZE I can't even imagine what you did-- but like you could ask for a budgie/parakeet /hj I mean, they aren't very expensive (actually they're pretty cheap) but they're very loud, need a lot of attention(especially if you want them to bond to you!) and you need to research into them a lot to make sure you're doing things right-- loads of vids online!! Loads of websites too!!! I'd know I have one- JUST A WARNING, FEATHERS AND SEED HULLS GET ALL OVER YOUR FLOOR XD p l u s like you have a friend who knows stuff about birbs :3 anyways ENOUGH RAMBLING FROM ME WOW THAT GOT LONG--

💕💕 I feel that XD OMS-- I WISH-- WHAT A D R E A M - s n a k - Awww but what a mood XD

XDDD oms YES-- EXACTLY-- XDDDD another good thing you should try eventually is SWEET POTATO CASSEROLE WHICH IS APPARENTLY DELICIOUS??? I TRIED IT FOR THE FIRST TIME(AT LEAST IN A WHILE) TODAY AND IT WAS SO FUCKIN TASTY????

H E A THEN-- XDD how cool of them to try tho :3 whEEZE Y 'A LL-- XDD

WHEEZE I SUCK WITH INSTRUMENTS SOOOO-- DAMN THA'S SOME BAD LUCK MY DUDE-- MAYBE YOU'RE CURSED DAMN-- oms wOWW--

Yesss-- ooh I've never played 👀 seen some stuff but never played-- (see: my computer sucks XD) I h a v e played Portal 1 and it is SO GOOD and SO SHORT and I WISH I HAD GOTTEN PORTAL 2 INSTEAD BUT THATS OKAY CRIES-- YESSSS THE SONGS SLAP--- ALSO THERE ARE ACTUALLY TWO WHOLE MORE CANON(PROBABLY KINDA MAYBE NOT?? IDK) SONGS, ONE FROM A LEG DIMENSIONS GAME("You Wouldn't Know") AND ONE THAT WAS CUT FROM PORT TWO("Don't Say Goodbye"(Harry101UK made an edit to make it Glados' voice!!)) THERE ARE ALSO A BUNCH OF GOOD FAN SONGS SO YEAH-- ALSO NOT TO BE A SIMP BUT GLADOS' VOICE? PERFECTION. I LOVE HER. ALSO I COULD LITERALLY DETAIL THE PORTAL LORE I AM INCREDIBLY EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN THIS GAME-- ALSO THERES A CLIP THAT SOMEONE MADE USING A (VERY GOOD) GLADOS TTS TO HAVE GLADOS SAY TRANS RIGHTS AND ENBY RIGHTS AND IF I FIND IT AGAIN ILL SEND IT TO YOU-- YOU COULD PROBABLY FIND IT IF YOU LOOM UP GLADOS SAYS TRANS RIGHTS? IT HAS A VIDEO WITH TRANS FLAG COMPANION CUBES ACCOMPANYING IT-- ALSO YES THE PORT MODS(/ADD-ONS? MAYBE? THEY'RE COMMUNITY MADE I THINK BUT IDK ALL I KNOW IS THAT THEYRE COOL AF--) (also I apologize for all the screaming? XD it's like, four am and I was talking about portal so.. whoops?)

Right like wth???? I???? Okay but like December to February babies just fuckin DONT EXIST IN THIS GEN OR SOMETHIN-- CAUSE I FIND N O N E -- Maybe there are more December babies but there are definitely like NO January to February babies it is So Weird--

NEJFQOBGKW WOWW d an g like-p l e a se s t op over sp r aying-- xD and LEGITTTT LIKE- THAT WAS M Y ROLE TO STAY UP LATE- XDD

WHEHEHEZE- LAUNDRY BASKET TIME- G E T I N XDD anD YESS- any doggo is just such a cute doggo 😭💞💞 but for me- fLUFFY ONES ARE WHERE ITS A T- and ohhhh i see- FOR FREE?? W H A T A S T E A L XDD but awwww the poor doggg at least she's with you now ! ;0;; 💞💞😭 aaw such a lovable puppup 😭😭💞 and oHHH i see :00 but oh no- xD i also have a friend that has two dogs and whenever he would give me gifts- there would be dog hair on them no matter what- XDD and ooOhhh those sound really helpful! omg- i swear i dont have to have a pet for the need of a roomba- i already shed so much hair myself its so crazy-- xDD and oH MAN loud animals are really gon get my mom fired up- and OO birds just look so cuteee i always fantasize of having one- but then again- with the noise and all xD the more i think about it i dont think we are prepared to have a pet at all xD but i still dream of at least having one pet in my lifetime!

and OO that sounds awesome!! i have no clue if i even tried casserole before- man- sometimes i just eat food without even knowing wth it is XDDD but THAT SOUNDS so gooodddd :O

and LEGITT LIKE- TF IS HAPPENING WITH MY SCHOOL LIFE- XDD and oh my god- IT GETS WORSE- that year there was a FREAKINGG FIREEEEEEE- it wasnt that dangerous thank god- but it had to get a whole ass room renovated because of it- and guess what room it was- THE ORCHESTRA ROOM- AND GUESS WHAT M A D E I T W OR SE- that year- it was the first time the school replaced those 10+ year old instruments with new ones- NOW THEYRE B U R N T- and mind you that the school's budget isnt so- gr e a t- like oh my god i am still so bewildered over HOW MUCH chaos HAPPENED that year- and i thought that year was gon be the year- yknow? like UGH

and OHH MANN playing portal sounds awesome! but i just dont think the game would be worth my money cause i know the plot- and even with the mods and all my brain would be broken as i would possibly have no clue what to do- xDDD

and HOOOO MANNN game fan songs are just so AWESOMEEE- and those sound pretty cool! :OO and HOLY SHIT FUCK YEAH- GLADOS SAYS TRANS AND ENBY RIGHTS Y A LL- now im gonna look that up and let my ears be blessed by such words- XDDD and DONT WORRY BOUT SCREAMING ALOT- i scream a whole dam lot too XDD

and LEGITTT- finding someone's b-day in january and feb is so rare all of a sudden like wh a t - XDD

[c0untb00z]

I would just like to clear, I don't hate the BBC Dracula 2020 Show. In fact, I actually like the idea of Dracula being set in modern times like in the show, but I would like it a lot better if it wasn't written like a fucking reader insert fanfiction.

Don't get me wrong, I love me some reader inserts every once in a while but they're meant to be on Wattpad. Sometimes, you can find really fucking good fanfictions that could genuinly be movies, but this really just feels like someone wrote an erotic fanfiction for Dracula. It almost reminds me of a worse version of 50 Shades of Grey with less kinky sex.

First and foremost Agatha Van Hesling. I actually kinda liked her personality, how driven she was and determined to never give up, but she was literally created for a love interest. In Dracula by Bram Stocker, Sister Agatha is a nun that nurses Jonathan back to health, claiming he was 'sick in the head' as he ranted of what he had seen and warning others of Dracula. She doesn't even have a last name.

However there is a Dr. Van Hesling in the book, hes dutch(???) Professor that mentors and taught(????) Jack Seward who was in love with Lucy, who was fed off of and eventually killed and eventually undead by the means of the one and only Dracula. Dr Van Hesling plays a large role in the plot of the book. He has an open mind and was able to draw connections between things that some others couldn't, as he had access to more sources and could speak to most off the charecters involved. He's the first person to present the idea of a vampire, and Lucy turning into one. Thanks to Jonathan he was able to identify the vampire feeding on Lucy as Dracula and finds out how to kill the vampires.

So basically Agatha was literally fabricataed for the sole perpose of being there, to fall in love with Dracula or something.

I know we all are horny for Dracula. I'm horny for Dracula. Vampires are fucking hot but the sexiest part of vampires is that they ya know. Kill you and are mercily and heartless. The show does show that in a lot of parts and even decapiates a nun and yeets it into a gaggle of nuns which i fucking died at. But it also, humanizes him way to much, hes literally a monster. The scene in the boat with lord whats his name really portrayed that. It was really,,,, weird cause me being a kinky fucker I don't find the particular phrases of "you're going to need to be quiet now," and " youre doing so well" that creepy and if anything a little hot but looking at the circumstance and the look on that kids face, it was like r e a l y fucked up. Which is why i liked that scene. It showed just how fucked up Dracula is.

To be fair i did like Cleas Bangs acting and casting as Dracula. He had a certain charm that was ever so s l i g h t l y off. I heard people say he just 'made up an accent' but fuck you guys its a fucking danish accent you incolent twats anyways. He could be really funny at times and i actually apprecited it.

However the casting AND acting of the modern parts is absolute shit. Ep.3 is where i kinda gave up on the show and finsihed it for the sake of torturing myself. FIRST OF FUCKING ALL LUCY i cannot fathom how P I S S E D i am about Lucy. Why did they have to make her a phone obsessed basic asshole with no regards to anyones emotions besides her own and the extent of her personality is 'getting likes on socail media is all i care about because it makes me feel validated so im gonna wallo in self pity because i was obiously written by white man in his 50s that would have made me white if he wasnt forved to throw in diversity points" like shut the fuck up steven king.

Also lucy and mina never meet??? Theyre in different fucking time lines??? Theyre friendship and love for eachother was fucking golden how dare you rob that form me and give me a garbage bag full of shit with a shiny little bow on top in its place jesus f u ck.

The cemetary scene was o k ay i gues?? I liked the little nod to the book with the bloofer lady and the concept of random sprits being undead because of unfinished buisness. But this really just felt like it was slapped in the show for the sake of going on a date with Dracula in cemetary. I actually kinda apperacted it but it just felt awkward.

Also who the f u ck is Lucy's friend? The gay one??? Like,,,, is that supposed to Arthur???? His chatecter was so fu king weird and offset he just didnt feel like he should be in there. Hes literally just there for a-50-year-old-man's-interpretation-of-young-women-now-a-days verson of Lucy to have a gay best ffriend.

Ok i not even sure if i want to talk about Quincy. It just hurts. It physically hurts me to think about how d i r t y they did my baby. His charecter is the defination of american chivalry, just as great as regular chivarly but with a little extra cowboy vibe. Quincy is jist the biggest,,,, sweet haert,, like he asked lucy to marry him in his cool american cowboy voice cause he knew lucy loved it and it always made her laugh. And even when she turned him down becayse her heart belonged to arthur, he stayed. All he wanted was for lucy to be happy and all he requested was that they stay frirnds. Hes also invovled with taking fkwn dracula although hes not a main charecter percice ly as he doesnt have any entires in the book he still has an amaizing precence and sometimes while reading the book ill be readying one of dr sewards passanges and think "huh i wonder what quncys doin. I hope hes dooin good. Cowboy vibes n stuffs" amd boy dles he do that. Everh dracula film adaptataion robs us. R O B S U S of quincy morris best scene. In the middle of dr van helsing ranting about vampires( thats basically what half of the book is. I could write a 4p minute mono louge of his rambling jesus how does sweard take note of all this) quincy litterally just walks out. And nobodg really pays any notice beside glancing ag his leave and shrugging at one anouther and going back tl listneing tl van helsing explaining his vampire fan theories quincy moris , the quincy morris from texathe untited states of the amerkca the land and the free and also cowboys.stands outside of the bouilding and pints his gun up at. Dracula whos in the shape of a fucking bat eves ddopping outside the window and just fucking,,shoots it. Now he doesnt hit it cause thatt wouldnt be as fun as brutally stabbing the fucker witja wooden stake. But S T I L L. And the fucking bullet hits the window that everybodys in anprobably causes arthur to shit himself the ppoor boy. Can you belive that theh didnt fucking flim thatfor any dracul? Now i i under stands why not put in this adaptation because quincy is only mentionsed like three god damned times. And when theh DK mention him jesusnshit they literally jsut made him some popular jock from amwrica just to conter jacks white twinky ass and then they had him propose to lucy in the middle of a fucking night club and she says yes???? Lile ok jut throw Arthur out a window then cause cause fu c k him i guess. And then after lucy dies he jjsy fucking moves ?? The only thing thta makes this version of qincy quinccy is the fu king name and fact hes from america

Ok now jack fucking seward. He reminds me of when ylu forget you had a pb&j in your back pack so in the bos after school you pull it out cause yoyr hungry and yoyr mom put WAY to much jelly on it so now its like. All obsorbed into the bread and joggy and squished. Just sad and really white. They even had some kid call him whate bread and they werent fucking wrong. His obly personality traits were ' omg i love lucy but shes a hoe ;,,,((' and being connected to Zoe.

Now last and definately least the god forbaden ending. Just thinking about it gives me a fucking head ache. So , jesus, zoe, who is agathas great niece or someshit, a d looks exactly like her (its literally the same fucking actress) is a detective lile scitist reasearching dracula. So dracula is illedatly attracted to her becasue he thinks shes like agathas reincarnation or soenshit. So he tries tk drink her blood at one point and spits it all out and pukes and sjit cause her blood is poisonous bevaise she has fucking c an c e r. So later we find out that draculas weaknesses ( the sun crucifix) arnt actually real hes just afraid of dying so he has like irration fears or some shit so for some fucking reason. They deside. Its a good iea to end the show with this:

Dracula fucking drinks all of zoes blood killing her and himself because her blood poisonus. And ghe fucking emd scene is them like,,, in the sun???? Or soemt hi ng??? And theyre naked and like presumably fucked and dracula says some shit like " its doesnt have to hurt" and i almost tore my wrist open wiith my teeth because of how shitty this ending is.

Not lnly is it disrespectful to zoe but agatha, agathas whole thing was K I L I N G. dracula she wanted him fucking D E A D she woULDNT FUCK HKM

And like just after finding out that he can be in the sunlight with out fucking dying and that crosses just make him umcomfortable or some shit he just desides to kill himself??? DUDE YOU JUST FOUND OUT YOURE PROACTICALLY MORE INVINCABLE THAN YOU WERE BEFORE AND YOU JSUT FUCKING OFF YOUR SELF ??? HE COULD HAVE FUCKING RULED ENGLAD AND SPEAD VAMPIRISM OLL LVER THE FUCKING COUNTFY AND WORLD KF HE TRIED HARD ENOUGH AND HE KILLS HIMSELF BECAUSE THEY WANTED A STUPID SAPPY ENDING

anyway if anyone actually goes through the effort of reafing my god damn eS S A Y about Dracula that i finkshed typing (im not gonna bother editing tbh) at 4 fucking am. Then thank you and please get a life

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

im supposed to be working on uh literally anything else but instead i gotta get this outta my brain

tl;dr: slag is causing the Psychos to spread across the galaxy bc the Calypsos are using it to both brainwash their cultists and give them ‘special powers’. i mean, its not just slag, it’s eridian ruins/tech, too, but the Twins are utilizing slag the most. which explains the slagfalls and also the processed eridium everywhere still. im hoping sirens will help us cure this- starting with Krieg because slag/Psychos have some sort of connection to the other dimension, just like Sirens, but more messy. also this insanity from the slag/Psycho-ness is literally Mayhem and us fans are taking part in it- we’re the cult irl. plus, this game is gonna be about love and the relationships we have with the people we care about and that’s all the roses mean because i’m feeling s o f t tonight. tomorning. whatever maaaaan

“… among their fractured ramblings, it is tempting to try and find a deeper meaning…”

“[their madness] defies attempts at explanation or containment. from an isolated region of a single planet, to a nearby moon, to systems throughout every human colony, madness is catching…”

you can’t tell me this isn’t just BEGGING for us to figure it out

so, for my own sake:

i have a theory.

i kinda sorta hinted at this with my destroyer theory but i REALLY wanna go all out in this because i think this is actually something to think about… mostly because ive seen A Scene… and i wants to talk about it, vh. i wants it

now im gonna `lol` ignore everything about my lost legion eternal theory and start entirely from scratch. it’s also 1am here for my apologies if this comes across as incoherent because wow i should be asleep but fuck it i got research to do

so it all starts with psychos. i mean i guess it does. it’s gotta right? i brought in pictures it must

anyway

the guide admits that the first psychos came from Dahl’s prison colonies

the ones abandoned on pandora, now ive kinda talked about this b4 but imma talk about it again bc uhhh fuck it? why not.

so we know a lot of the bandits left on Pandora mutated because of the eridian ruins/the key. this is referenced mostly in sledge’s mine

its like world-wise called headstone mine but i never remember that. SLEDGE’S MINE

notice that line “most went crazy and many were physically mutated as well”

so i think it’s safe to say whatever they found in there started causing psychos to appear on pandora

im saying that i think eridians are the cause of Psychos across the galaxy

i have a lot more proof for this so please sit back and enjoy the ride because i think its really really cool

so lets look at hector’s logs from the newest dlc

“one of my boys found a shiny alien trinket”

“a few boys went rabid already, had to put them down”

now idk if there’s a connection here, but it’s interesting that both times, people who found these eridian artifacts started going crazy soon after

shit i mean even tannis begins to go off the wall after her and her dig team start investigating the eridian sites. although if that is because of the horrific incidents that befell her and her team or the ruins idk for certain. i’d bet its the shitty incidents tho

there’s more to this, hang on…

alright, so, lab rats? they’re pretty cool right?

we all like lab rats! personally, chase is my favorite, but adam is hilarious. that final season, huh? pretty wicked… wasn’t really a fan of the island setting but you know what, to each their own. it’s cool they actually progressed the show instead of staying stagnant. that got my respect even if it moved in a direction that wasn’t my cup of tea.

anyway Q U O T E S:

“Hyperion opened my eyes. i didn’t want it!”

“needles in my eyes!”

“don’t you look at me!”

“i can see! i don’t want to see!”

so there’s obviously something ~fucky~ going on with the lab rats and whatever it is they can see from the hyperion experimentation. we know hyperion had a hard-on for slag experimentation and you know i wouldn’t even be shocked if they were injecting these rats’ eyes with slag.

the best part is their reactions when they’re phaselocked. Unlike most enemies, the lab rats will only react to maya’s action skill, and none of the other VHs.

vs something like a marauder:

who has all these voice lines for Zer0, Axton, Sal (merc), AND Maya

the lab rats will only ever respond to being phaselocked.

and what do they say?

“i see the universe!”

“i see infinity!”

“it’s beautiful!”

 (now weirdly enough i was told on the tv tropes for bl2 that the lab rats will say “I see it more!” when phaselocked by maya, but i couldn’t find a source for that. couldn’t even find it in the files i extracted from the game. i checked an online video just to double check because you know, my extraction could’ve been off, but it wasn’t there, either. even phaselocked one a bunch as maya and i couldn’t get it to proc. so, idk where that info came from, if someone could give a source/proof that would be awesomesauce.)

sooo what do other enemies say when phaselocked? usually… they just see blue. so nothing quite as interesting as infinity.

so wtf is up here? 

im thinking the experiments hyperion performed on the lab rats are letting them see the dimension maya locks them in. i mean, tbh, i think they can see into that dimension whenever they open their eyes, but maybe maya’s phaselock makes sense of it for them. because they seem to be in indescribable agony outside of it

but the lab rats aren’t the only enemies that only react to being phaselocked

turns out the psychos only react to phaselocking, too

they also have some fun lines:

“I can see forever!”

“I’m home!”

“I’m inside… I’M INSIDE ME!”

with some other nonsense thrown in for fun

so idk, just taking a look at this, it’s clear the psychos and lab rats are seeing something that the other bandits just aren’t seeing. most reactions are demands to be released or that they’re flying, or just straight up confusion as to what’s happening.

is that the side effect of their exposure to slag/eridian tech? yeah, imma bet on it. their mind machines probably broke because they saw something they weren’t supposed to (possibly into the other dimension. the one maya phaselocks them in) without proper ‘protection’ and thus went batshit. like maybe sirens are protected from the craziness of the other dimension because they’re ‘chosen’ or whatever. iunno.

i do think it’s most interesting that the psychos seem familiar with whatever they’re seeing, calling it ‘home’ and well… themselves. 

so why in the fuck am i talking about all this? because i think it ties straight into bl3.

let’s bring back lab rats and their experiments

you know how hyperion was supposedly injecting their eyes with slag? and it caused them to shoot those weird blue lasers out?

what happens to the destroyer’s eye in tps?

yeah we inject this bad boy with slag

“i only juice the eye with a little bit of slag at a time”

which ends up causing a singularity around the eye the second time you do it

“if this slag stuff is powering the laser, we need to force as much of it as we can back into the eye. the increased power will trip a failsafe and let us shut everything down”

oh, increased power? you mean like how Sirens get increased power from absorbing eridium? that kind of increased power?

we know in bl1 the Destroyer seemed to have something like slag in it- those glowing pockets on the tentacles that explode into purple goo

even its attacks are like purple liquid. which, you know… would be quite similar to slag (tho tbf, these attacks actually hurt instead of applying the debuff)

and boy does the destroyer not like it

“warning. space-time instability detected.” after injecting the eye with too much slag. but… why? it got too powerful? are its powers directly connected to the other dimension and by increasing it’s strength a bunch we created some sorta link between our dimension and the other one? 

i mean given the other dimension allows for teleportation and shit, im not surprised there’s a space-time instability!

i mean we’ve all seen it do the eye laser thing, and the tentacles, and the purple goop. but causing space-time instabilities… that’s new isn’t it? kinda like how Sirens get new powers after they absorb a bunch of eridium???

so i wanna take a guess as to what the destroyer is

we know its ‘immortal in its own realm’ but when it’s taken an actual body that we can kill it, so odds are, it never actually died in bl1 OR tps. i imagine the Destroyer we see in bl1 is just a small fragment of it, and that it’s consciousness can be spread out across hosts. *EDIT: actually the lovely @automata-systemata-hydromata reminded me that you can find the destroyers brain in Helios. The other stuff I left in should be fine tho I thiiiink (thank you!).

and that, y’know, is cool and all, but what IS it??

Jack uses slag to give it a power boost, but it doesn’t seem to be happy about it when it happens. in fact, it even seems scared.

to be honest, all we know is that the eridians locked it away for some reason

idk im just spitballing here, but what if the Eridians were the creators of the destroyer? not intentionally, or maybe it was the result of one hell of a slag experiment/exposure to the other dimension/eridian tech, but we’ve seen what slag/exposure to eridian stuff does to humans… makes them go crazy, makes them start mutating. i mean, look at badass psychos. look at goliaths.

i mean shit even think about bloodwing. she goes wild, attacking the VHs and not listening to mordecai’s instructions despite their bond

she grows to a huge size and gains a whole shitload of new powers she didn’t have before. including fucking fire breath (which we’ve seen in burning psychos)

you know these dudes

i go into all this eridium/slag mutation stuff in SO much more detail in this post here, so if you’re interested in mutations, read this!

so what if the destroyer is just one HELL of a mutated eridian/alien and it plus all the eridium was locked away forever in the other dimension to keep this from ever happening again? because god, i wouldn’t want that to ever happen again, either, and i guess locking away the eridium (you know the stuff used in all these hyperion experiments) would be their best bet at ensuring it. also maybe just… locking away anything with eridium for that long probably isn’t the best idea… maybe that’s why it’s all tentacles and death. maybe they just locked someone away in a Vault as a prison and then leaving them with all that eridium caused them to mutate wildly out of control. kinda like the FEV. 

i mean we know ‘slagged psychos’ look like this 

i wouldn’t be surprised if we gave them enough slag/time they’d end up mutating even worse. and the destroyer was left in the vault for hundreds of years.

so wtf is the connection here with Sirens? there’s gotta be one, right??? is slag experimentation the first rung on the ladder of volatile science to achieving siren-hood? like you’d have slag/eridium experiments/mutations -> the lost legion eternal -> actual Sirens. maybe if sirens take in too much eridium they become something like the destroyer. now that’s fucked up to think about.

maybe it’s better the twins took lilith’s powers away from her…

oh, speaking of mutations and burning psychos and hyperion experiments, you know what we haven’t talked about yet?

Krieg. 

let’s talk a whole lot about Krieg, because he is super important

krieg is important for a lot of reasons.

u know what his teaser trailer was named?

yeah i don’t think that’s coincidence one bit

ahhh Mayhem.

“deep beneath pandora, an experiment has escaped”

we know krieg is a hyperion test subject, dr samuels confirms this (and apparently contracts insanity as well at the end of the Crawmerax DLC)

also we know some other tests going on at the WEP from the quest Doctor’s Orders:

“this vault key didn’t make eridium come outta the ground for nothing, right?”

and there’s this one very very very interesting line by Tannis at the end of the quest:

“the spread of slag poisoning” yeah call it that DUMB name tannis, im gonna call it what all the kool kids are calling it: ~Mayhem~

so… Krieg.

what’s so special about him?

well… he gives us insight into what the hell is actually going on inside the heads of some psychos.

so idk about you guys but i always took this as a poke at Maya and Krieg, but i realize now that this is talking literally just about Krieg. it’s about his body holding both sides of himself.

krieg does appear to be like lucid behind the psycho controlling his body, which, idk about you guys, but for me that plants some pretty horrible mental images of all the psychos in-game who probably have similarly exasperated people behind them who are getting murdered because they can’t control themselves anymore.

and idk i wrote this whole post about how maybe the slag experimentation is turning people into hosts for the destroyer’s consciousness and that could explain all the wacked up psychos and shit. but tbh im not gonna talk about that today

just about slag experimentation/eridium exposure. we know what it ACTUALLY does and that’s mutate the hell out of things and cause insanity.

Krieg is like… the poster child for slag experimentation/eridium exposure

soooo why does slag experimentation make people go insane? could be any number of reasons, but tbh i would bet it has to do with that other dimension somehow. because eridium isn’t a normal ‘our dimension’ element. it came out of a vault. from a different dimension. and who knows the long-term effects of that shit.

i personally had a theory that the 4th dimension had something to do with time and that only Sirens are able to harness this power, but then i have no idea how to explain angel and amara’s powers through that lense, so eh. fuck it. just seeing an upper dimension would make you go crazy anyway, so let’s not bring any time shit into this because that’s just asking for trouble. 

either way

i think that sirens are able to make sense of that other dimension. they have some sort of command of it/some sort of tie to it that allows them to not go crazy the instant they interact with it, unlike psychos. unlike lab rats. unlike Krieg. it’s like… eridium is our window into this other dimension or some shit and Sirens are (literally) able to process it, while it just fucks over anyone else who tries to interact. ~kachow i just introduced parallels~

and tbh i think we’re going to use Sirens to help cure this plague of insanity going around the universe. probably starting with Krieg. i mean, the only time he’s able to get even an iota of control is when he sees Maya. “Turn around pretty lady!!” like… that’s HUGE for him. and Maya’s a Siren. im not saying the power of love isn’t strong… but maybe the power of Sirens is stronger. i’d love if tannis helped us out with that. maya, too, if she really did learn more about sirens on athenas. 

this all ties into borderlands 3 for 2 reasons:

1. Mayhem being both the tagline for this game and Krieg the Psycho’s DLC pack is not a coincidence

2. The calypso twins are going to be using slag to both brainwash people into becoming cultists and give them special powers

`breaks fingers` this is the real meat of this theory, all that other stuff was just getting you READY for this

let’s put the Mayhem stuff off to the side for a second and just focus on the Calypso twins.

We know they’re promising their cultists special powers and free brainwashes (lol)

we’ve seen that one concept art from the museum of mayhem with the giant slag pool

we know enemies are STILL dropping refined Eridium even though it seems like all manufacturers have stopped creating slag weaponry

and we’ve seen the slag falls in a bl3 promo material already

oh yes

okay so i said right at the very beginning of this document that i’ve seen A Scene that i wanna talk about and oh baby this is it

This Scene right here

look in the very back there

look familiar???

~it shooouuuuullld~

yeah this is it!!!

so what i think is going down: anyone who’s not already insane is sorta ‘baptized’ as their entrance into this cult in the big ol slagfall. maybe the twins have a way to induce slagged cultists so they can have elemental affinities. not sure about that.

regardless

the twins are using slag to drive people insane (turning them into psychos) as a form of brainwashing to force people to join their cult.

so that’s the special powers and the free brainwashing and the slagfalls down.

let’s talk about why exactly we’re seeing enemies drop bars of refined eridium even though hyperion stopped making them. because the twins are making it!! it makes sense why there’s no slag guns still, even if it still exists in-universe: of course no manufacturer is going to contact an insane bandit cult just to get their hands on slag for their guns. 

there was a 7 year dry spell of eridium production so there was no slag to go around, so companies started phasing it out of their guns and replacing it with nuclear. 

but the twins have recently started production again. they’re obviously not using it in their guns, or selling it to other manufacturers. so wtf are they using it for? it’s gotta be important, it’s holy holy holy.

special powers and brainwashing!

and the refined eridium is back in circulation, so enemies are still dropping it. see? solution acquired.

as for psycho-ness spreading across the universe? it makes sense. not only are the twins using their slag to brainwash people and turn them into psycho cultists, but people are also being mutated by the eridian ruins/vault keys/vaults on the other planets and being driven insane. This craziness is quite literally Mayhem.

Mayhem is coming, indeed! 

now let us talk about what the fucccck gearbox is doing with all that Mayhem stuff in the trailers and shit.

sooo WE are the cult surrounding this game. as the fan base. 

do u think it was coincidence that they made ‘ECHOnet’ Streamers the leaders of their big bad cult and then also immediately introduced, in real life, the Twitch ECHOcast extension and invited a bunch of streamers to play their demo? they knew exactly what they were doing. Giving away a free cultist psycho mask to everyone who preorders a console copy of the game? that’s intentional. everyone who preorders the game gets a ‘gold weapon skin pack’? yeah! you know what gold weapons represent in-universe? higher standing in the cult!! gearbox is making commentary on how we are all just like the cultists!

AND THEY ARE TOTALLY RIGHT

all the trailers having something to do with Mayhem? ‘Mask of Mayhem’ ‘Mural of Mayhem’ ‘We are Mayhem’ ‘Mayhem is coming’. We’re all insane cultists because we’re all absolutely fucking rabid for this game and they KNOW IT.

…

oh also we’re all in love with each other lmao. 

in all seriousness, i think the game is going to focus a lot on the relationships we have with the people we care about- our found family, our romantic interests, our friendships- and that’s being expressed through the roses. 

i think that’s why all the characters are shown in the roses on the cover art. why the roses are so prominent in the So Happy Together trailer. why Zane is sitting at a bar with a rose between himself and his clone (as a joke, but still, it’s the intent). 

red roses are, like, the most obvious way to show your affection to someone. and we know the bl3 Vault Hunters are going to find family in each other in this game. that we’re going to watch the calypso twins’ relationship become warped as the game goes on. hell, we’re probably even going to have a whole plot about tina and mordy (and talon) and brick being a small family together, and maya and ava being one as well. plus ellie and vaughn have gotten together since commander lilith. shit, guys, even claptrap is building himself a girlfriend.

this game’s about love, guys.

anyway i have been working on this since 1:30am. it’s currently 6:06am. i am very tired and very wired and those never mesh well. im gonna go eat some motherfuckin pizza.

edit: i missed the obvious connection the first time around: of course we’re going to cure Krieg, he loves Maya. and this game is all about love.

that and/or one or both of them die and gearbox hurts us right in the softest parts of our hearts.

edit 2: also yeah at some point in the near future im writing that Hyperion-Twins theory because as much as i love Atlas, i have ~seen some things~

[writers-leir]

prince!jeonghan

prince!jeonghan

aka part two of prince!vernon

should probably be named “in which jeonghan finds his nap buddy”

he’s lowkey still salty about his nap buddy leaving him for vernon

but he’s happy for them so he lets it slide

he tried to get chan to be his nap buddy but chan flat out rejected him

after that he went to seungcheol who was like l o l i know i’m your second choice don’t try to fool me

awihgskjlfsadgxcbn he tried

ANYWAYS he naps alone for now cause he doesn’t like any of the women (and men because,,,,have you seen jeonghan he’s such a pretty person) who like,,,,,throw themselves at him SO

introducing: you

you’re a simple gardener at the palace

by simple i mean the only gardener because his parents trust you like 999% with their garden and unless you also trust someone 999% you refuse to let them hire a helper for you

so you’re super busy

you rarely see any of the other people who work at the place much less the prince

jeonghan’s mom is always like ;~; we’ll hire the nice lady who works at the flower shop in the town you trust her right? cause she’s so worried you’re gonna work yourself to death at such a young age

but you’re like no,,,,i only trust her 998% with my flowers,,,

and like while you know what jeonghan looks like you’ve never actually seen him so you,,,,,don’t realize who he is when you find him sleeping on one of the flowerbeds

all you see is this ONE IDIOT WHO IS RUINING YOUR HARD WORK

the work that you put your literal blood sweat and tears into

you can’t even count the number of times you’ve cut yourself or almost fainted from the heat trying to make the flower bed perfect

one time it rained really hard and the left side of the tarp ripped open and half of the flowers were destroyed and your heart broke

you refused to do anything for the next week while replanting all the flowers

the rest of the palace staff felt so bad for you during that week they kept bringing you freshly baked bread or that really good tea secretly

and while jeonghan’s parents knew what the staff were doing they didn’t say anything because they loved you like another child

(and they lowkey would wish that jeonghan would propose to you someday BUT THAT’S A STORY FOR LATER)

anyways back to jeonghan sleeping in the flowerbed

those flowers are basically your children

and so you can’t even beGIN to describe the horror you felt when you saw this one LANKY IDIOT NAPPING IN THEM

honestly you didn’t even realize he was wearing a very expensive white dress shirt and black slacks that CLEARLY looked royal

plus his family emblem was on the blazer thrown to the ground beside him

you’re sooOOoooO ready to give this flower killer a piece of your mind

and as the gardener of course you’re carrying a bucket of water and you’re just,,,,,,SO ready to go fight this person who’s destroying your children

and how else but to dump all the water on him?

at first jeonghan’s like kSDHGAKLJDS what the

and then he looks at you and he just kinda,,,,,,,,,,,oh what,,,,,,,,,,,,

and now you’re like kAKJSDHGAKJSDHG because did you really just pour like three liters of water onto the PRINCE

and jeonghan WANTS to be angry because now he has to go back to the palace to change and the time he has for his naps has been reduced

but he just,,,,,,,,,,can’t seem to get angry because you look???? so scared asdkhgkasd

you immediately get on your knees bowing like asdkjhgkljsHDAGSD IM SORRY I DIDN’T KNOW IT WAS YOu and you’re rambling on about how you got a lot little annoyed at how someone was ruining your hard work without a second thought

jeonghan’s like IT’S OKAY i’ll just go get changed pls get up;;;;;;; i didn’t realize how important these flowers were

your eye twitches because,,,,,,,,,did he just imply that those flowers are unimportant,,,,but you don’t say anything because you already almost lost your job

jeonghan knows all the palace staff by name and face so,,,,,he felt pretty disappointed in himself when he realized he couldn’t put a name to your face

he asks his mom about you that night and she’s just kind of like celebrating with his dad because  F I N A L L Y they meet

(jeonghan in the back: what)

she tells him that you’re the only gardener so you rarely have any free time

she also mentions about you being childhood friends with butler!joshua

jeonghan almost runs joshua down the next time he sees him but joshua’s like I’M HOLDING YOUR MOM’S BEST TEACUPS D O  N O T  TOUCH ME

when jeonghan asks joshua about you during his break joshua’s just like //insert suspicious face// why do you want to know

and then when jeonghan tells him about what happened josh’s like LOL you called their flowers unimportant man rip your chances with them

jeonghan: but they’re????just flowers/???????

joshua: don’t say i didn’t warn you

joshua advices jeonghan to offer you some help (even if you might reject it,,,cause it’s the thought that counts right????)

at first jeonghan’s like,,,,a little hesitant because his already limited break time is being cut even shorter and he knows like,,,,,nada about gardening

and the suspicious look in your eyes didn’t help his confidence at all

you end up agreeing anyways, and to start off, you have him fetching water for you

he’s like lowkey shocked at how heavy one bucket of water is but you’re just?????carrying two with no problem (and he swears that there’s a skip in your step like,,,,where do you find the energy to do this all day???)

his parents are also like !????? because a) that’s the crown prince,,,,,,following behind this gardener carrying buckets of water and b) did you really just,,,,,,agree without hesitation or putting thought into it????

they’re supportive of it though

like you’d think that the king and queen would be super against the crown prince doing any manual labor?

but no. not jeonghan’s parents. they’re super supportive because!!!!!their favorite (only) gardener can finally take it a little bit easier!!!!

at first you honestly feel like jeonghan’s not going to do as well as you expect because your expectations are sooooo high but then???? by the third week he’s able to start naming the types of flowers and their meanings, or even knowing exactly how much water the flowers beside the oak tree need (and by exactly i mean to the millilitre)

eventually you allow him to actually start managing the flowers (pulling out weeds, planting more, etc…)

and his parents are,,,,,,quite shocked to say the least

jeonghan actually finds himself enjoying every second he spends working on the garden (it’s totally not because you’re there)

he’s not going to lie, the first week was Stressful seeing as you refused to take your eyes off him

but he also lives for those moments when you thank him for helping you out or when you compliment him on his knowledge on gardening

in reality, he actually goes to joshua every evening for a lesson (but since joshua’s knowledge on gardening is limited, he eventually hired florist!jihoon from the town to help him out)

when seungcheol found out he straight out laughed in jeonghan’s face, telling him that he was super whipped for this person he barely knew

“i am not whipped!!!!”

“you’re literally taking an hour every day out of your rest time just to learn about gardening to please this person. are they that cute?”

jeonghan’s ears are turning red because yes you are that cute

of course his old nap buddy finds out too since they are childhood best friends

his old nap buddy was like a w e when they found out because “does jeonghan have a crush??”

“we’re not in middle school p l e a s e”

it’s highkey cute though because he eventually becomes comfortable enough with you that when he sees you he literally c r u s h e s you into a hug (you don’t complain because 1: it’s the crown prince asdkgjaskdf and 2: you may or may not have a crush on him,,,,,,,)

after the first time you allowed him to do something other than carrying water you forced him to get older clothes that no one cares about getting dirty

but,,,,,,he didn’t have any because they threw out his old clothes as soon as they became too small so he ends up going to joshua who was like i,,,,,,literally have only my uniform and these jeans and a shirt,,,,,you can go ask seungcheol though?

he ends up going to the town to get some stuff and accidentally binged out and bought four bags worth of clothes

so you and jeonghan end up getting into this routine where he joins you after lunch to work on the gardens and then leaves again in the evening to go eat dinner and do his work

you two don’t spend a lot of time together (the most having been 4 hours), but you get to know each other a little bit from that limited time

you find out who his former nap buddy was and you’re like o h my god. that’s the person who killed their succulent plants every time they got a new one

jeonghan: that’s the one yep

jeonghan actually starts enjoying the time he spends with you so much that he sometimes ends up skipping lunch and dinner (and then at like 8pm when you ask why his stomach has been growling non-stop for the past half hour he’s like NO REASON nope none at all)

he just really likes spending time with you like he doesn’t even care that he’s getting mud under his nails, or scars from the thorns on the roses

“scars are manly!!!”

“jeonghan you cried for half an hour and refused to use any bandaid other than the spongebob ones that joshua carries around”

you always feel really bad because now jeonghan refuses to let you do the hard work but you’re just like jeonghan i’m the gardener this is my job i get paid to do this work

suddenly though jeonghan just stops??? coming???

you think that maybe he’s just sick but after a week you’re like ?????????????

they even closed off one section of the garden and you’re like ))): because that was the section that you had wanted to save until you could decorate it to your own style and now they’re going to renovate it ))))))):

except no they’re actually not

it’s actually a surprise from jeonghan for you because he knows that you wanted to make that section your own little personal garden but you just never have time

and the past two, three months that he spent with you was enough time for him to figure out what you wanted

he recruits the help of seungcheol, chan, jihoon, and joshua (when they’re not busy) and the five of them are spending literally hours upon hours trying to perfect it

when jeonghan placed the orders with jihoon he almost fainted because !!!!! it’s literally impossible to find bird of paradise flowers in this part of the world

but jeonghan was firm with what he wanted and he told jihoon to just place the order under the king’s name (to which his dad was like “why did i receive three truck loads of flowers yesterday???”)

his dad was okay with it though,,,as long as jeonghan paid for it

you kind of,,,,,give up trying to find jeonghan after the second week because the rare chances that you did see him he literally sprinted the other way and you were like,,,,,,what,,,,,

you tried asking joshua about it but he refused to tell you anything and you were like!!!!!i grew up with you what do you mean you CAN’T TELL ME JOSHUA HONG DON’T TURN YOUR BACK ON ME

a month later you’re approached by seungcheol and joshua and you’re like ( ≖.≖) at joshua who’s just like LISTEN you gotta trust us

you follow them outside and towards the area that was closed off and you’re like ???? why were they building a glass -oH THAT’S A GREENHOUSE

and you’re sooo confused?? until you get inside and realize,,,it’s a mini palace

literally because there are ROOMS for each of the types of plants like,,,there’s a room for the tropical ones where the humidity is kept higher than those that need a drier environment

you’re like watching joshua and seungcheol try and hide their smiles and you’re just like teLL me what’s going on aksdhgaklsdf

they lead you through the maze of flowers (you swear that it did not look this big from the outside) and you get to the end and jeonghan’s there

and he’s like,,,,,,,dressed up as if he’s at a party

and you suddenly feel super underdressed cause,,,,you’re wearing an old oversized shirt and muddy overalls,,,

seungcheol and joshua leave you two and you’re just like ??is something the matter

jeonghan tells you that he knows how much you wanted to make your own little garden but you never have time so,,,,he decided to do it for you

and at first you’re like aksdhgkjSHLGADSGJ what and he’s like oh,,,,did you want to do it yourself????? )))):

but you’re like nooo!!!! that’s not it,,,,i’m just shocked,,,,

you’re just like a mixture of confused and also lowkey kinda touched because,,,,,he really paid attention to the details and he remembered what flowers you liked,,,,and went out of his way to get them too

you ask him why he did this and he turns red like his ears are so red that you could literally hold a tomato up beside it and it’d be the same color

for a minute it looks like he’s trying to find the words to say and you’re like,,,,,is something the matter?

but then he says “will you be my nap buddy from now on?”

and you’ve known jeonghan long enough to understand exactly what he means by that so you’re like alksdhgakljsdhgKJLSDHAGLDS i would,,,,love to,,,,,except you know i can’t actually take naps,,,,,,right?

and throughout the entire conversation jeonghan just seemed really tense

but as soon as you said yes his entire body just relaxed and he smiled reaaaally really wide like y’know that really pretty smile? yeah that’s the one

when you see that smile you’re like “even with all these flowers, you’re still the prettiest”

and jeonghan’s so red he’s literally STEAMING at his ears asdhgkajlsdf

the next day when you run into joshua he’s like grinning really wide and you’re just like i’m still mad at you >:(

the king and queen hear about it like that very day because,,,,,it’s not like they had to deal with the massive amount of flowers that were ordered or anything,,,,,

jeonghan basically forced you to let him hire jihoon to help you out with the garden because “i can’t be having my future spouse dying early”

despite jihoon having been one of the people who originally helped jeonghan with the greenhouse, he’s actually not allowed to help with taking care of the flowers inside it

it’s kind of like yours and jeonghan’s little secret (even though it’s not a secret but it still feels,,,,nice to have that one spot for just the two of you)

and o f course jeonghan,,,,managed to sneak in a mattress and some pillows and a blanket to put in the corner for the two of you to nap at

when you officially meet jeonghan’s childhood best friend (aka vernon’s partner), you give them a giant book titled “Easy Plants for Beginners” and a ten minute lecture on how not to kill them (you even had notecards and everything prepared)

jeonghan on the side: that’s the love of my life right there

even though you keep telling jeonghan that you refuse to take naps during work he still manages to convince you to take a 20 minute nap

which ends up turning into 2 hours

he’s honestly willing to do anything for you,,,,i mean he gave up sleep to build you an entire garden askdghaskldf how much softer can someone get right?

[joeljoelwarr]

Dating Park Jimin Would Include:

Warning: none, maybe?

Genre: f l u ff

okay

oof this will be easy its just me ranting

i lied this was actually lowkey hard because i couldn’t think of a meeting scenario

i apologize XD

oK aY 

SO

Y’all meet in like the most obscure place i stg

it’s the middle of a street at like midnight,

no one is around

barely any lights are on

you think he’s probably going to murder you and wear your skin as a coat

because he’s running towards you

and he suddenly stops and just

“oH MY GOD I DIDN’T SEE YOU Im so sorry i was running because im scared of the dark”

you just smile

just a little

and for som e  r e a s o n

he walks you home despite your protests and various forms of

“but then you’re in the dark longer”

oof he 100% tries to be sweet and kind and not shake

but he fails

and so technically

you’re comforting him

not the other way around

b u t

when you get there you pull him inside for a moment and he

pfft

he just

“you’re not going to shear my face off and wear it as a mask are you?”

“what no”

you just grab a marker and you write your number on his arm

and he’s a little endeared 

because you just dealt with his anxious ramblings

and so he agrees to call you

boi takes a wEEK to call you he’s so busy worrying about whether or not you actually want him to that he forgets to do it 

Dates

you answer the phone just completely confused 

you never got his name and yet you mysteriously gave this mysterious man your number

boi you gonna get hurt that way

anyways

you answer and the first thing he says is 

“i FORGOT TO CALL YOU I'M SORRY”

and you laugh

and he feels all of his nerves melt away

and he asks you out

and because he’s an idol

y’all meet super late

again you’re like

“b u t d a r k n e s s”

he kinda doesn't care

because you’re there

y’all somehow find a small restaurant that’s somehow open still

oof this is cute

he makes you try this thing

and you’re not sure how you feel about it

but he tells you that it’s mochi ice cream

“you look like a mochi”

he is suddenly so enamored with you after that

he has never before believed that he looked like a mochi

but one sentence from you and he suddenly can’t deny it

Cuddling

OOF THE GOOD PART

Jimin loves watching shows with you, even if he has zero clue what’s going on

even if its supernatural and terrifies him

as long as you like it

he’ll watch it with you

b u t

he likes to lay back against the corner of the couch arm

and so you just kinda lay against him 

and he loves it because he can watch your expressions while you’re watching the show

and you love it because you can hear his heartbeat

when you’re sad, he’ll hug you quietly

and make sure you know that you’re loved 

especially when it’s a family thing

or a friend thing

and when he’s sad

you tend to buy ice cream and make sure to cuddle him

because he’s hard on himself 

and he needs to be treated softly during these times

because he’ll treat himself roughly

oof i made myself cry

i apologize

Ma R r I aGE

okay so at this point you’ve both been through thick and thin

long nights and short ones

long months of waiting

and short days of patience

you have been through it all

and yet your relationship has lasted through it all

and he spent so long picking out a perfect ring

months 

almost an entire year

and he finally chose a rose gold band with a beautiful diamond resting on top

the small diamonds inside of the band is what costed the most

but for you he’d spend all the money he had

he brought you out to a park in the middle of the night

and you were so confused

(by now he’s no longer scared of the dark he’s okay boo)

but he brought you to a small area where he had hung up lights

and laid a blanket out

and you guys had a picnic

with all your favorite foods

(+ mochi ice cream of course)

and you were watching the stars and the moon

when he pulled out the ring box from his pocket

and he was just sitting there with it open

so he said your name

so you’d look over at him

and you dropped everything and sat up so quickly

“Y/n, uh, this is going to be anything but perfect because i stupidly didn’t practice,

but you are my rock. you keep me grounded, you make me feel better when i mess up, you help me through the dark times and the bad days.

you make good days better, and better days great,

and i want that to continue.” 

he slowly tried to get on one knee from his position in criss-cross

dumba** cutie ily

and you didn’t even let him finish his question

“Y/N L/N, will you-”

you tackled him

and he totally dropped the ring

it took you guys two hours to find it in the grass with only flashlights and the rays from the hanging lights

it was hard

but when you put it on he could see you beaming at it so fondly

and so it made him beam at you so fondly

and y’all are just so fond of each other

Wedding

Now, y’all had a moderately normal wedding, not too big, not too small, but big enough that there was a lot of food.

you didn’t allow alcohol (other than champagne) because you didn’t want to have to drag people out drunk

you also didn’t want people throwing up

jimin agreed

namjoon gave the most awkward speech ever but it made jimin cry and hug him so it was worth it

your best friend embarrassed you with a story from college

it was great okay

your outfit was amazing

he looked fantastic

skip forward to that night,

im not even kidding

you two were so tired

you just fell on the bed and went directly to sleep

no messing around or anything

b u t

the next morning

y e s.

now we all know jimin is kinky af

but this is probably one of the few times (other than the rest of the times that week of your honeymoon) that he wouldn’t be 

because he wanted it to nice and sweet

not the other stuff

because you guys just got married

so he was like sweet through the whole thing

(unless you’re not someone who wants sex, then you sat and watched movies the whole morning because he’s sweet and wouldn’t push you to do something you didn’t want to)

a n y w a y s

you’ve been married for about four years when you got pregnant (or if you are a male/asexual/other you found out the adoption papers went t h r o u g h/you found a willingsurrogate)

he was so excited

he literally ran out of the house about to rush to tell the guys

before running back in and kissing you so intensely

he was very happy

he dragged you to tell the guys

and he called both of y’alls parents

they were just as excited

you were a little flustered not gonna lie

so y’all had three kids together

two boys and one girl

you agreed that once you had a girl you would have no more

because you wanted both genders

one of your sons turned out to be gender fluid

which both of you were perfectly alright with (freaking fight me if you’re not, i will break you.)

“yissss i got the whole set”

“j i m i n”

regardless, older siblings were very protective of younger sibling

she hated it tbh

but appreciated it nonetheless

but n ON E were as protective as jimin when she got a boyfriend

n o n e

you were more than willing lemme tell you that

when she married the guy jimin cried

heavily

REGARDLESS

THIS WAS LONG

I APOLOGIZE

have jimin’s favorite picture of your daughter as an apology

how cute

okay bye

[jinwoosmoles]

ahhh i didnt get a notif that you responded so im sorry if this took a bit long,, but the groups i bias are bap, bts, seventeen, monsta x, sf9, knk, got7. my bias' are yongguk, jungkook, vernon (also minghao. jeonghan, s coups,, i cant pick just one rip), kihyun, tae yang, seungjun, and jackson (but i lowkey bias JB and mark i cant choose one) and i am SHOOk by astro, monsta x, and seventeens comebacks,, im hitting word limit so i whats your fave era among the groups you stan? ~secret aroha

No, no. You responded super, super fast, unlike me and my slow, procrastinating butt. 

I WANT TO TAKE THIS TIME OUT TO THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR DEALING WITH ME. I APPRECIATE, LOVE AND CHERISH YOU. 

I was only going to put a ‘read more’ for the first ask but I don’t think people would want my rambling on their dash. Sorry, if it bothers you. I forgot asks have a word limit. Also, warning. There’s quite a bit of vulgar language. I’m sorry. 

BAP. A MUTUAL HAS BEEN REBLOGGING BAP AND I HONESTLY AM PROBABLY GOING TO FALL FOR THEM TOO. 

VERNON. VERNON IS GREAT. HIS RAP IN CLAP. I CAN’T GET OVER. Jeonghan is an angel from heaven. We’re so blessed. S.COUPS, DID. YOU. SEE. THE. FOREHEAD. OHMYLORD. Minghao, minghao and junhui. the China line is also a blessing. Seventeen is a blessing. LOL. 

SPRING D A Y. I LOVE SPRING DAY SO MUCH. Is it it’s own era, ynwa, or is it considered wings era? Nonetheless, spring day. The love I have for Spring Day is honestly infinite. I’ve listened to it on repeat for almost 10 months straight aND I WOULD FOR ETERNITY, but their recent comeback broke the streak, and Astro. LOL. BUT THE MUSIC VIDEO, THE LYRICS, THE FUCKING MELODY, EVERYTHING. E V E R Y T H I N G. NAMJOON’S RAP. YOONGI’S RAP. HOBI’S VOCALS ON THE LIVE STAGES, THE F UC KING CHOREOGRAPHY. I WAS SO HEARTBROKEN THEY ONLY PROMOTED IT FOR A WEEK. UGH AND TAEHYUNG. D AMN TAEHYUNG’S V O C A LS. ESPECIALLY, excuse my lack of musical terminology, DURING “YOU KNOW IT ALL, YOU’RE MY BESTFRIEND, 아침은 다시 올 거야” IM SCREAMING. Don’t even get me started on Jungkook, Jin and Jimin’s vocals ughhhhh. PLUS. GRAPE JOON. WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE AND PINK HAIRED JIMIN IS GODLY. BLACK HAIRED YOONGI? IM DECEASED. MY FAV PICS ARE OF JUNGKOOK, THE LIL PINKISH PURPLE HIGHLIGHTS IN HIS HAIR IS BARELY VISIBLE BUT IDK DURING A FANSIGN A FEW FANSITES CAPTURED IT AND I WAS D E A D. plus he was also wearing glasses during that particular fansign and that was just a gift sent from god himself.  Anyways, enough about that. 

Seventeen’s mansae era. Hand’s down. Mingyu’s hair. Mingyu’s hair. MINGYU’S HAIR. I wasn’t a kpop stan during a lot of these eras. I think BTS is the only one. So I’m sorry i don’t have much to say and that my opinions are very shallow and visual biased. LOL.

ASTRO IS SO HARD. I BECAME AN AROHA WHEN THE CRAZY, SEXY, COOL TEASERS WERE RELEASED, AND GLASSES JINWOO AND RED HAIR JINWOO AND “PRETTY, SEXY, FACE AND BODY” JINWOO, AND JINWOO IS DRAWING ME TO SAY THIS ERA IS MY FAV. BUT. Confession Era. Jinwoo in the school uniform is the ultimate killer. Plus the choreography, I’m crying. BUT BABY ERA. BABY ERA IS SUPREME. BUT CONFESSION. I LOVE CONFESSION SO MUCH. AUTUMN STORY IS GREAT. LONEY, STAR, YOUR LOVE, STAINED. Astro has cleansed my soul. I love innocent love too. SPEAKING OF INNOCENT LOVE. PREDEBUT/DEBUT ERA. U G H. JINWOO REGRETS THAT HAIR SO MUCH BUT I HONESTLY LOVE AND APPRECIATE AND ENJOY IT AND HIS BABY FACE. U G H. Let’s just say all eras are my fav. 

 TWICE IS ALSO HARD. I HONESTLY THOUGHT TT WOULD BE MY FAV ERA BUT LIKEY EASILY TOOK FAV ERA. LIKEY IS SO DAMN GOOD. PLUS DAHYUN IS KILLING IT. 

DAMN. FOR NCT 127 IS CHERRY BOMB ERA. NOT ONLY BC THEY DIDN’T WRECK ANY OF THEIR HAIRS. BUT IM LIVING FOR DOYOUNG, TAEIL, JAEHYUN VOCALS. NCT DREAM HAS TO BE WE YOUNG ERA. LMAO. RENJUN IS KILLING ME. FAV NCT U IS WITHOUT U L M A O. TAEIL LOOKED SO DAMN GOOD. 

EXO. KOKOBOP. Minseok getting the lines he deserves and looking damn fine. 

Blackpink’s playing with fire era. 

GOT7′S JUST RIGHT ERA. THE MV IS THE SECOND KPOP MV I WATCHED IN MY TIME AS A KPOP STAN AND HAS BEEN MY FAVORITE FOR THEM.  

I’M SORRY I MAKE YOU READ SO MUCH. DAMN. AS TIME PROGRESSES, I’LL PROBABLY STOP RAMBLING SO MUCH. 

Your Turn! What’s your favorite eras? Have you ever got to see any of your bias’ groups live? Also, who’s your bias in astro? 

Sorry I come up with lame questions. I’ll try better. (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)

[pacman-tattoo]

Okay so we got the boys as big brothers but I'm curious,,, what about the BMC girls as big sisters???? :0

omg yes yes yes i’ve been thinking about this but i’ve been avoiding doing it since i’ve had requests aka im using this as an excuse to do it

i just put everyone under the cut since i did all of them so

thank u nonny

Christine

best. older sister. ever.

if you’re into musical theatre, it’s a huuuuge bonding experience!!!! i headcanon christine started when she was a kid and always loved it so just

imagine getting into it when ur in middle school/high school????

christine helps you with stage makeup and teaches you how to do it properly and what the right amount of stuff is!!!!

if ur not into acting n stuff, you work crew or lights maybe

or you just come to every show and cheer her on!!!!

internally you’re just like “THATS!!! MY SISTER!!!!”

although the play she did junior year was kinda weird

all her theatre friends know you

like?? you could have never done theatre and everyones like “IS THAT [y/n]???”

christine will jam out to showtunes in her car and she gets INTO IT and its rly fun and sometimes the two of you have duets 

also the two of you will sing like 50 different parts for one song

can i be honest and say christine probably has sO MANY PICS OF U TWO LIKE

CLOSEST SIBLINGS EVER

also sometimes people are like “do u two fight” and ur like “no???? why would we” “ur siblings” “i mean yeah but have u seen her?? does she seem like the person who would fight over dumb things? like the closest thing we’ve gotten to a fight is when i said one of her musicals was ‘okay’ and thats because i didnt even listen to half the soundtrack”

… u two… watch bootlegs together….

“JUST LOOK AT HIM HE’S AN ANGEL” “CHRISTINE U NEVER STOP TALKING ABOUT HIM I KNOW HE’S AN ANGEL”

ok not theatre-related stuff

christine!!! is just!!! really positive a lot!!!

but like, you kinda get to see her being unsure sometimes

if anyone talks shit about her yOU ARE R EA D Y TO F I GH T

christine takes meds for ADD and often you’ll remind her in the mornings just in case she forgets (which is rare unless she’s had a late rehearsal the night before! but she still appreciates it!!)

christine knows exactly how to cheer you up! like, you like sitting back and watching movies? she’s got u. you like petting dogs? well, the best she can do is pictures at the moment but she will sent u all!! the dog pics!!!!

i hc that she’s really into romcoms so sometimes she takes u to the movies with her and its fun

ok but like

midnight chats with christine where the two of you just kinda aimlessly ramble together and its a very nonjudgmental time and you two talk through things

also helping christine by running through lines with her. thats all

u and christine have a lot of videos of u two doing stuff like ur own lil skits and ur own “cooking show” together as kids and it’s really cute

i just rly love christine and its rly obvious

Chloe

i mentioned how with jake as ur big bro you get a lot of ppl like “oh, ur jake’s lil sibling” and it’s the exact way with chloe

except you get a lot more fuckboys. its gross. you’ve told off a few of them.

alright i’ve had this headcanon but like

fuck gender roles completely. chloe does ur makeup and you feel like a god damn boss

like, ur eyeliner could cut a man.

brooke is around a lot and shes nice to u (sometimes nicer than chloe is)

honestly chloe is rly confident and she strikes me as the kind of person where like, you could be having a bad day and she’d just compliment u but in a way that ur like “is… is that a compliment or are u mad that im sad”

its both.

can i say that chloe is kinda terrible? to other people? like she can be kinda crass toward you a lot but she has these little moments where she’s actually a decent big sister (like her doing ur makeup???)

but even then you two fight and its not rly a good time but one of u will apologize if its Really Really Bad

i like to imagine chloe’s parents have moments like “take [y/n] with you” and shes just “ughh fine”

her friends dont rly mind since ur mostly quiet

“anyway she’s kind of a slut-” “chloe don’t fucking call other girls sluts”

the two of u argue. some of her friends are recording u two fukn fighting

softly theres just someone going fight fight fight fight

it probably ends up on social media

so people know..

you have a couple people like “YO!!! U FOUGHT WITH CHLOE????”

“yeah i mean she’s my older sister so… i can call her our on her shit i guess?” “WHAT T HE  FUCK SHES UR SISTER????”

“wait she signed up for the play?? wtf who else is in it” “jake dillinger-” “god damn it chloe.”

im not even gonna touch on anything that happened at the halloween party other than just you were glad she got out unscathed in the end. 

but after some rumors fly u dont rly trust her??? as much???

anyway. moving on.

Brooke

actual Good

“why do you hang out with chloe?” “w-what do you mean?” “no offense but……she seems…..kiiinda bitchy……..”

brooke doesn’t talk to u until u apologize

which honestly is understandable bc chloe’s kind of her bestie and u just insulted her so

anyway

very gentle big sister

shes in play??? u will be there like!!! “thats cool i didnt know u were into theatre”

i feel like i talk about the play in every headcanon i do but its such a big part so

wait is she dating this guy

she seems to??? kinda like him??? he sounds nice

whats his name

jerry or something

ur ready to fight him tho like, remember brooke’s ex who cheated on her??? u may or may not have called him out.

and possibly punched him.

and possibly gotten beat up

dont fuck with football players

brooke comes home from jake’s halloween party kinda early and shes rly upset and ur just like “wHO HURT U”

ur gonna fight chloe and jeremy.

maybe.

anyway u kinda sit around with her trying to cheer her up

the next day the two of u go to the mall or pinkberry or somewhere to cheer her up

then chloe calls

“brooke please dont pick it up”

she doesn’t.

and then she does after chloe texts her and ur like “brooke n o o o”

ok so uh

brooke is a sweet big sister even if she’s not there 24/7

imagine being asked on a date by someone cute and ur like ‘fUCK BROOKE H E L P HOW THE FUCK’ and she helps u look cute and calms u down

a sweet bab

i love her

Jenna

im just gonna go ahead and get it out of the way: you know a loooot of shit since jenna knows everything

jenna is protective and no one dares to say shit about u because like

rumors fly? she’ll debunk them AND find the fucking source and tell them off

someone insults u and she hears it? she will F I G H T

someone insults and makes u feel bad and she always finds out because she’s rly good at noticing things??? she will either cheer u up or approach the person herself

or both

i dont care where u guys go but ur family will go on summer road trips and you and jenna take selfies everywhere like

close siblings. the good shit.

honestly jenna is probably the kind of person who watches tv with u and sometimes she ends up not sleeping a lil so she just keeps watching whatever show and then shes like

wait shit i cant spoil this for them

jenna sits next to u and ur like “you already know whats gonna happen dont u” “yeah” “gdi”

jenna strikes me as the kind of person who would be a vlogger imo

being her sibling u get pulled into her vlogs sometimes

theres no warning shes just recording u at 12 am in the kitchen like

“hey [y/n] what are u doing” and u just staring at the oven “baking cookies what does it look like-” and u look up and shes recording and ur like “ayy”

late night snapchat story consists of her and u watching stuff together bc neither of u can sleep

sometimes she just gets a “jenna go to bed”

it never happens

i wish

i had more headcanons for her but i d on t

thats all babes