#a little cas pov for this Wednesday evening

[jenanigans1207]

1/8/25: Embrace

“Cas! Hey, hey, you okay?”

Cas blinks blearily, trying to make sense of what’s going on. He’s on the ground, his head is pounding, and there’s a strong stinging sensation along his cheek. It takes him a second to figure out what he’s looking at, some mixture of black and a beautiful, vibrant green swirling together until Cas makes out Dean’s concerned face just inches from his.

“Cas, c’mon,” Dean urges, a hand fitting to his shoulder. “Can you sit up?”

Cas thinks that he probably can, but as he moves to try and place an arm under him, he’s met with a pounding in his head so violent that he can only finch and press closer to the ground. Dean lets out a breath above him, his hand a steady and comforting weight on Cas’s shoulder. He’s quiet for a minute, but even with his eyes closed, Cas can feel the weight of his stare.

“He okay?” Sam’s voice calls from the other end of the room.

“Probably a concussion.” Dean answers, his hand moving gently up and down Cas’s arm in a soothing gesture. “And he’s got a nasty cut on his cheek. But he’s still breathing.”

“We can work with that.” Sam answers and Dean huffs out a soft laugh above Cas.

The pounding in his head has subsided, so Cas attempts to open his eyes again. Dean is still right there, and he’s still beautiful, staring at Cas with blatant concern.

“Dean,” Cas manages, and Dean shushes him immediately,

“Hey, you hit your head pretty hard. I’m going to help you sit up, okay?” Dean’s other hand gently begins to wedge itself under Cas’s side. “It’s gonna feel like shit for a second once you’re up, but I promise it’ll subside.”

Cas groans in response.

“Hey,” Dean says again, and the tone of his voice indicates that he expects Cas to look at him. Cas meets his gaze immediately. “You trust me, right?”

“Yes—” Cas says and before he can even finish the last part of the word, Dean is hoisting him up into a sitting position.

Dean was right, it is shit for the first few seconds. His head throbs and the world spins and Cas thinks he might find out what throwing up is like for the first time. He hunches forward immediately, his eyes closing in a desperate attempt to protect his head. He feels his forehead brush against the solid plane of Dean’s chest and if he were even a little more coherent right now, he would expect Dean to pull away and be surprised that he doesn’t. But he isn’t coherent, he isn’t thinking about anything other than how truly awful this feels, and so he presses into the comforting warmth that is Dean and doesn’t even notice until the throbbing subsides again.

Once Cas has been seated upright for a minute or two, the world starts to return to him slowly, He hears Sam dragging something around in the distance, hears him splintering wood to create a pyre. He hears the faint sounds of nature outside in the distance. And then he hears Dean breathing, and he realizes just how close he is. In a panic, he attempts to sit abruptly upright, only to find that there’s an arm around his shoulders holding him in place.

“Woah,” Dean murmurs quietly between them, “Careful. If you sit up that fast, you’re gonna go back to feeling like shit.”

“Dean,” Cas says again, like Dean’s name is a lifeline that he can hold onto in this disorienting situation. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be so close.”

“It’s alright, Cas.” Dean speaks just as quietly as before and it dawns on Cas that he’s doing it on purpose to try and spare his head the discomfort. Cas feels both love and gratitude wash over him. “Just take it easy for a sec, yeah? Let yourself adjust and when you’re ready, I’ll get you patched up, But you’re gonna be out of commission for a few days with the knock you took to your head.”

Cas sighs, but allows himself to sink back into Dean. He tries not to think of the arm around his shoulder, of the way it feels more like an intimate embrace than anything else. He tries not to think about the way Dean is solid and steady, gently adjusting Cas until he’s able to fully relax into Dean.

“I’m sorry.” He says again, and he sounds miserable to his own ears.

Dean shakes his head a little, and Cas feels the motion ruffle some of his hair. “None of that.” Dean instructs. “You think Sammy and I haven’t had our fair share of concussions? It’s part of the job.”

“It’s a bad part of the job.” Cas remarks and is rewarded with a warm squeeze of the shoulder and the sound of Dean’s laugh.

They stay that way for another minute, Dean’s hand drawing soothing patterns through Cas’s trench coat. They don’t talk, just remain close while Sam continues to work in the background. Once Cas feels ready, he sits up slowly, and this time Dean lets him go, but he’s never more than a foot away, He inspects the injury on Cas’s cheek carefully, his fingers deft and gentle. Cas tries not to count the shades of green in Dean’s eyes, but then finds himself counting the number of freckles on his cheeks instead. He tries to turn his head away, but a gentle grip on his chin holds him steady.

Once Dean cleans Cas up to a level that will tide them over until the motel, he nods in approval and leans away.

“You’re set for now.” Dean says, and then he hesitates for a moment before adding, “Don’t scare me like that again though, okay?”

“I will try not to.” Cas answers, gaze finally downturned now that his face is free.

Dean shakes his head fondly, reaching to help Cas up. “We’ll work on it.”

[supernaturalscribe67]

T-Shot

Words: 8,204

POV: 3rd Person

Pairing: Castiel x Trans!FTM!Reader

Warning(s): Language, Needles, Description of testosterone injection, slight angst if you squint, hurt/comfort, description of afab anatomy (use of the word 'clit' once), fluff, Castiel not understanding social cues

Summary: The reader has started his journey with testosterone, and his boyfriend, Castiel, promises to be with him every step of the way. What Castiel didn't realize was that the testosterone would change (Y/N) more than he realized.

Request:

Hi I was just wondering if you could do a Sam or even Cas fic (romantic) where reader is trans FTM and also asexual. Where the reader starts testosterone and sam or cas helps them with the new changes. You can just have fun with it. Make it a sad a bit too but end with a happy note :)

Anonymous

A/N: Someone please come and take this pen away from me. This fic was only supposed to be, about, 3k words, I don't know how it turned into my longest fic. I hope you guys enjoy! Feedback is much appreciated!

~Much Love!

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

As he descended the bunker steps, the paper bag crinkled in (Y/N)’s hands. It was the best sound he had ever heard in his entire life. For, in that very bag, was the key to achieving everything he had dreamed of and more, allowing him to get one step closer to the person he was destined to be. And it all came in a little glass vial.

(Y/N) looked in the library but found it empty, so he walked down the hallway to his bedroom. His steps were rapid, anxious, yet excited. When he entered, he saw Castiel on his bed, who sat up. The movement of the door startled him, but he was quick to recover. (Y/N) flashed a small smirk his way.

“Hey,” he greeted and closed the door behind him.

“You’re back,” Castiel stated and stood from his spot on the bed. He took a couple of steps closer to him. “How did it go?”

(Y/N) held up the bag. “I got it.” His smile widened.

Castiel matched his grin as he stepped even closer. He reached a hand up to cup (Y/N)’s cheek and gave him a soft peck on the lips. “I’m glad to hear that it went well. When are you scheduled to take your first dose?”

“Well, the doc said I can take it anytime I want to start. I just have to make sure to keep it spread out to a dosage every week. So, today’s, what? Wednesday? I’ll be taking them every Wednesday from now on. Preferably at night. Easier for me to keep track that way.”

Castiel nodded as he listened intently to everything (Y/N) told him. “I see. When will you plan on taking it tonight?” He tilted his head to the side. 

“I was going to wait until after supper, but I’m too excited to wait.”

“May I watch you?”

“Of course, babe,” he said before he walked past Castiel and over to his bed.

(Y/N) sat the bag down before he took his shoes off, kicking them to the side. He then unbuckled his belt and let his jeans fall to the floor with a light clink. He stood in nothing but his boxers and t-shirt. He would have taken his binder off to make himself even more comfortable, but he was so focused on getting the medicine in his body that he didn’t even consider it an inconvenience. As (Y/N) sat on the bed, he beckoned Castiel over and patted the spot next to him. Castiel followed his instructions and sat down, his hands folded between his knees. He watched with great concentration as (Y/N) grabbed the paper bag and ripped it open. Inside the bag was a long, rectangular box, two different sets of needles, four syringes, alcohol wipes, and band-aids. Castiel studied the supplies curiously.

“This is everything I’ll need for the month. I have my testosterone, the bigger needles to extract it, the 23-gauge needles to inject it, syringes, alcohol wipes for sterilizing my skin and the surface of the vial, and cute little cat band-aids for when I’m done.” (Y/N) explained, showing Castiel all of the supplies as he talked.

Castiel paid close attention. He examined everything presented to him, taking in as many details as he could. He picked up the small box and opened it. The vial dropped into his hand when he tilted it to the side. His eyes narrowed as he examined the clear content. As he moved his hand back and forth, he watched the solution swish around inside.

“This is what you put into your body to change yourself?” He asked.

“Yep. It may not seem like much, but once it kicks in, you’ll start to see the differences.”

(Y/N) grabbed the box of alcohol wipes and opened them up. He grabbed two from the pack; one for the injection location and the other for the vial. He set the unopened packs beside him and did the same with one of the band-aids. The needles soon followed, one of each being placed beside him, each of their packages opened to allow easy access when he went to switch them out. Next, was the syringe. It, too, stayed in the sterile plastic, but was opened for easy access. He then turned to Castiel and held out his hand. Castiel carefully placed the vial in his hand, and the process began.

(Y/N) grabbed the syringe and connected the larger needle to the end of it. He set that to the side and grabbed one of the alcohol wipes, ripping the corner of the packet with his teeth. Using the wipe, he cleaned off the top of the vial. He disposed of the wipe and grabbed the needles and syringe. The needle was uncapped, and he could feel the nerves bubble inside of him. He pulled the plunger of the syringe, allowing air to collect inside. The doctor said it would make for a more accurate extraction. With caution and precision, he injected the needle into the cap, tilted the vial upwards, and took out the dosage prescribed. The mere sight of the testosterone dripping into the syringe sent euphoria coursing through his body. 

With the extraction completed, he replaced the needle with the 23-gauge. He took a deep breath to steady himself, took out the other alcohol wipe, and disinfected the area on the top of his thigh. 

“Alright, the moment of truth,” he mumbled.

Using one hand to grasp the flesh of his upper thigh, (Y/N) gently guided the needle to his skin. The initial prick shocked his muscles a bit, as he wasn’t aware of how tense he had been. They were tight, and he knew he had to focus on relaxing them, otherwise it would hurt worse than it was supposed to. He didn’t stop pushing it in until the needle was fully in his thigh, the base of the needle almost flush against his skin. Once it was sheathed inside of him, his thumb shifted to the plunger and he began the injection. It wasn’t much - the doctor explained that the first couple of dosages would be smaller until they got a good sense of how his body was reacting to the medication - but it felt as if it took an eternity before the syringe was empty. When he was done, he, carefully, pulled out the needle. A small dot of blood mixed with testosterone appeared on top of his leg. He capped the needle and set it off to the side before he grabbed the bandage and placed it over the blood. 

He stared at the band-aid for a moment - it came in a cheap pack of twelve and had a blurred image of two kittens cuddling on it - before he looked up at Castiel.

“I did it,” he smiled brightly. “I just got my first t-shot.”

Castiel’s eyes shifted to (Y/N)’s and he mirrored his smile. He took a second to look over his features. Slowly, his expression shifted from joy to slight confusion. “You don’t look different.”

(Y/N) chuckled. “It takes some people a couple of months to notice any physical changes. It’s not magic. Wish it was,” he mumbled. “That’s why I need to do it every week, so it stays in my system and makes the changes.”

“Ah,” Castiel nodded. “Well, I’m proud of you, (Y/N),” he took his hand in his.

(Y/N) furrowed his brows. “For poking myself with a needle?”

Castiel shook his head. “You told me that getting your testosterone was going to be your biggest step in your journey of self-discovery so far. I’m proud that you were brave enough to take this step to become the person you’ve been destined to become.” Castiel reached up and gently cupped (Y/N)’s cheeks.

As cliche as it was, (Y/N) could feel his heart skip a beat. Ever since he told Castiel about wanting to start testosterone, he had been nothing but supportive. He always expressed that he wanted (Y/N) to live the life he wanted to live and that he would be by his side for the best and the worst of it. (Y/N) got lucky enough to have a partner like Castiel. It was as if he came right out of a dream. For that, he would always be grateful.

(Y/N) reached up and brushed his fingers against Castiel’s knuckles. “I love you, forever and always.”

“I love you, too. Forever and always.” Castiel replied, leaned in, and kissed him softly.

*~*

“Holy shit, this pizza is so good,” (Y/N) mumbled as he shoved the rest of the crust into his mouth, stuffing his cheeks full.

Sam and Dean gave him a questioning stare as he ate, their bites slow and methodical compared to his. Castiel, on the other hand, stared at him with an intense look of concern. It had been a little over a month since (Y/N) started testosterone and, while there hadn’t been many noticeable physical changes, there was one thing that everyone took notice of almost immediately; his intense change of appetite. 

Man, could that boy eat.

It wasn’t the fact that he served himself more during meals, either. If he wasn’t eating a meal, he was snacking. He snacked on chips, candy, fruits, vegetables, sandwiches, you name it. Anything that could be placed in a pantry or fridge had been eaten by (Y/N). Dean couldn’t even count on one hand the amount of times he had gotten on him for eating in the car, only to get a stern glare from both him and his boyfriend. Castiel hadn’t been too sure why (Y/N) began to eat as much as he had been. When he asked about it, (Y/N) simply told him that it was because of the testosterone, but didn’t give many details other than that. It left Castiel with a lot of questions that sat in the back of his mind, curious about the other aspects of testosterone that caused non-physical changes to occur.

(Y/N) reached for another slice, hesitated, and then grabbed the last two slices.

“Hungry?” Dean asked with a quirked brow.

“Starving,” (Y/N) mumbled, his mouth still recovering from his last bite.

“Are you sure?” Sam asked. “That’s, at least, your fifth and sixth slices.”

“Sam’s right, (Y/N). You’ve been eating a lot recently. Are you sure you’re alright?” Castiel asked warily, placing a hand on (Y/N)’s knee, rubbing it comfortingly.

(Y/N) chuckled. “I’m fine, babe,” he said, cheekful of food. “It’s just the testosterone. It makes me really, really hungry.”

Castiel flashed him another concerned look, despite the nod and small smile he gave. (Y/N) noticed his hesitancy and he flashed him a closed mouth smile. He placed his hand on top of his, swallowed his food, leaned over, and placed a small peck on the corner of Castiel’s lips. 

“I’m fine, babe, I promise.” He said as he looked into his eyes. 

Castiel studied his expression for a moment before he smiled again, one that was more genuine. “Alright.”

(Y/N) nodded briefly. “Okay, I’m going to the bathroom,” he said before he pointed at Sam and Dean. “Don’t touch my pizza.” The threat dripped from his lips. 

Sam and Dean raised their brows and watched as (Y/N) stood from the table, his eyes still piercing their souls as he left the room. Dean shook his head and took another bite of his food. Castiel glanced over at (Y/N)’s plate, then cast his gaze down to the table. His hands were on his knees, and he rubbed them tightly. Sam, noticing the distraught on his face, cocked his head in curiosity.

“What’s up, Cas?” he asked, placing his food back onto his plate. He folded his arms on the table.

Castiel gazed up at him for a moment before he shook his head. “I’m just worried about (Y/N). He doesn’t normally act like this.”

Sam gave him a sympathetic smile. “It’s a pretty big change, the testosterone. It’s as if he’s going through puberty all over again.”

“Sam’s right,” Dean chimed in, some pizza sauce and spittle peaking out of the corner of his full mouth. “Sammy ate like a pig when he hit puberty.”

“Not helping,” Sam deadpanned. “It’s just a side effect of the drug. It won’t last forever.”

“That’s what he told me, but I didn’t think it would change him like that.”

Sam chuckled. “Trust me, you’ve just scratched the surface of the side effects. It’ll be an interesting journey, to say the least.”

That comment didn’t seem to ease Castiel’s worry, which Sam took notice of. He sighed.

“Tell you what,” he dug into his pocket and took out his phone. “I have a couple of articles regarding the side effects of testosterone. Keep in mind, not everyone goes through the same experience, though, and not in the same order as others, either, but I can send them to you so you can at least have an idea of what (Y/N) could go through.”

Castiel nodded. “Thank you, Sam. That would put my mind at ease.”

“I don’t see what the big deal is,” Dean shrugged as he chewed the last bite of his pizza. He brushed the crumbs off of his hands. “So the kid has a bottomless stomach, who cares? The only bad thing about it is that he steals all the damn food! I didn’t even get a chance to have more,” he gestured to the empty, grease-filled pizza box in the center of the table.

Sam rolled his eyes. “You’ll live,” he mumbled.

Dean looked over at (Y/N)’s plate, eying the single intact slice. It was obvious that the gears in his head were turning.

“Dean,” Castiel said in a deep tone of warning.

“What!?” He held out his hands dramatically. “I’m hungry.” Dean paused, eyes still glued on the food. Casually, he reached over and grabbed the uneaten slice. He brought it to his face and was about to take a bite when a loud, booming voice echoed throughout the kitchen.

“Drop it!” (Y/N) shouted.

Dean visibly jumped, eyes wide as he turned to see (Y/N) in the doorway, eyes laced with red fury. He quickly put the pizza back onto (Y/N)’s plate, got up from the table, plate in hand, and walked swiftly over to the sink. Sam snorted and took a bite of his food as (Y/N) stalked over to the table. He glared daggers into the back of Dean’s head. If looks could kill, Dean would have been dead…again. (Y/N) sat back down. 

“Asshole,” (Y/N) grumbled under his breath, picked up one of the slices, and took another bite.

*~*

Every fiber of his being was sore. Grave digging was not for the weak, and that was exactly how (Y/N) felt after the salt and burn. The three of them came out of the hunt with some minor scrapes and bruises that were certain to go away on their own over time. Injury-wise, he was fine, but his muscles screamed in pain and agony as he moved from the Impala to the motel room door. They begged for relief in the arms of a hot shower, but he knew his blessings were limited. The pain, however, wasn’t the only thing he noticed during the aftermath of the hunt. Once the adrenaline wore off and his senses finally came back to him, there was one crucial detail he had failed to take notice of before then.

(Y/N) smelled horrible.

It wasn’t as if he had gotten blood or guts on himself during the hunt. All he did was sweat. He knew there would be some changes in the way his body odor smelled, but, in no way would he have assumed it would be as pungent and foul as it was. He even made sure to layer on the deodorant during his pre-hunt preparation as an extra precaution, but it was all to no avail.

“I call first shower,” (Y/N) said as Dean took the room key out and unlocked the door. “Have I always smelled this bad?”

Dean scoffed. “I was going to offer you the first shower, anyway. You smell awful. I was going to say something earlier, but I figured Sammy would yell at me or something.”

The three of them entered the room, welcomed to the sight of Castiel laid back on his and (Y/N)’s shared bed. He sat up, eyes immediately scanning over their bodies, taking in all of their details for any sign of injury. Sam shook his head and walked over to his duffel bag that lay on the floor next to the opposite bed.

“Yeah, ‘cause you would have probably been a dick about it,” he retorted.

“I would not!” Dean exclaimed as he strode to his bag.

“No, please, be a dick about it. I wanna know for the next time.” (Y/N) shook his head and retrieved some night clothes from his duffel.

“What would Dean have been a dick about?” Castiel asked, head tilted slightly to the side.

“About telling me if I smell.” (Y/N) answered.

Castiel furrowed his brows. “I thought it was considered rude to tell people they smell bad.”

“Yeah, random people. Dean’s my friend, though, and friends help each other like that. They tell you if you smell or look bad to save you from embarrassment in public.”

“Does that apply to myself as well?”

(Y/N) smirked. “Yes, Cas, it does.”

“So, should I inform you of the red and white spots that you have on your face?”

(Y/N)’s smirk vanished and was replaced by a deep frown. Wordlessly, he walked past Castiel and to the bathroom. The dim light illuminated the poorly decorated room, the vent whirring to life. He stood in front of the basin and studied himself in the mirror. Upon closer inspection, (Y/N) gaped. Accompanying the blotches of dirt scattered around his face were red, angry zits. There were some across his cheeks, some on his forehead, and a giant, ready-to-pop whitehead on his chin. Castiel made his way over and placed his hand on the doorframe.

“Is everything alright, (Y/N)?” Castiel asked cautiously.

“No! Everything’s not okay!” (Y/N) whined and squeezed past his boyfriend so he could point an accusatory finger at Sam and Dean. “Some fucking friends you are! First, you don’t tell me that I smell bad, and now I find you didn’t tell me that my face looks like it lost a fight with a pizza!?”

“(Y/N), plenty of adults have acne. I didn’t think it was a big deal,” Sam defended himself.

Dean pursed his lips. “I thought Sam would yell at me.” He shrugged.

Sam shot Dean a glare and (Y/N) sighed.

“I went out as an agent like this.” He complained.

“You look fine,” Sam said.

“Fine? I look like I got out of a five-hour Leave of Legends session and drank Mountain Dew nonstop! That mixed with my voice sounding like I’m going to beg my mom for the new Fortnite Battlepass doesn’t necessarily scream agent.”

Sam and Dean both held in their laughter as they looked away. (Y/N) shook his head. 

“I’m so glad you two find this funny,” he grumbled and crossed his arms over his chest.

Castiel came over and placed a hand gently on his waist. “(Y/N)?”

(Y/N) turned his gaze to Castiel, absentmindedly leaning against him. “Yeah?”

“Despite the marks on your face, I still think you are the most handsome man I have laid eyes on.” He offered a soft, sweet smile.

(Y/N) stared at him and took a deep breath, lips pursed. Slowly, a smile crept onto the corner of his lips.

“You always know what to say to make me feel better.” He said, leaned up, and kissed Castiel on the lips.

“Ew!” Dean exclaimed as he picked up one of his pillows and chucked it at the couple. “Get a room!”

*~*

Another day but, fortunately, not another hunt. It had been a month since the group had been able to rest from the copious amount of cases available, and they were taking advantage of it. They deserved a small vacation. (Y/N) and Castiel spent quality time together in the man cave, curled up on the couch with a blanket draped over their laps. A movie that (Y/N) had practically begged Castiel to watch played on the television. Castiel was laid back against the arm of the couch, his arm draped around (Y/N)’s middle so he could hold him close. A bowl of popcorn, coated deliciously in butter, sat between them.

“I don’t understand the conflict that the two storm-chasing teams have with one another. What happened to cause the rift in their relationship?” Castiel asked, eyes glued to the screen.

(Y/N) shrugged. “Honestly, they don’t go into detail about why they’re against one another. I wish they did,” 

Castiel hummed and went back to watching the film. A couple of minutes went by before the sound of footsteps came closer to the room. Dean poked his head into the door. He looked at the TV and then down at the couple.

“Hey,” he said.

(Y/N) glanced at him, grabbed the remote, and paused the movie. “Yeah?”

“I’m heading out on a supply run. Do you need anything?”

“No, I’m good, thanks,”

“Alright, I’ll be back in a bit,” Dean moved away from the door and began to make his way down the hall.

(Y/N) watched the doorway intently as he listened to the footsteps disappear into the distance. “Can you do me a favor, babe?” 

“Of course,” Castiel said, his attention fully on (Y/N). “What is it?”

“When Dean comes back, can you distract him?”

Castiel furrowed his brows. “Why?”

“I might, and I’m saying might, have played a prank on Dean that he’s not going to be too happy about.”

“What did you do?”

“Well, you know how, recently, I’ve stopped having my period?”

“Yes?”

“I had a lot of tampons and pads left over, and I didn’t necessarily want them to go to waste. So, I figured, what better way to get rid of them than to prank Dean with them.”

“How would you prank Dean with menstrual cycle products?”

(Y/N) bit his lip, anticipation filling his chest. He practically counted down the seconds, awaiting Dean’s imminent return. His muscles were tense, and the urge to run began to rise inside of him.

“Let’s just say Baby has some new decorations.”

“(Y/N)!” Dean’s voice echoed throughout the bunker.

Castiel’s head whipped toward the door, then immediately returned to (Y/N). “I’ll distract him.”

“God, I love you,” (Y/N) planted a kiss on Castiel’s cheek. “Bye!”

Without a second to lose, he threw the blanket off of him and dashed out of the room as quickly as his legs would allow. 

*~*

(Y/N)’s jaw dropped in a massive yawn. The mere sight of his bed made him want to collapse, but he knew he would hate himself in the morning if he didn’t change into something more comfortable beforehand. Castiel was sat at the end of the bed, loving gaze attached to (Y/N) as he went over to the dresser to get dressed. He was practically on autopilot as he moved, grabbed an oversized t-shirt and a pair of night pants, and proceeded to undress. However, something stopped him in his tracks as he took his binder off. His head was cast down, studying his chest intently. 

Castiel had witnessed that many times before; a dysphoric episode. There had been times when (Y/N) would sit and question himself about his appearance, whether out loud or mentally. Castiel would always take the time to remind him of how handsome he thought he was. How perfect he was. The progress he had made with testosterone. How in love with him he was. That moment, though, seemed different. Castiel stood from the bed and walked over to him.

“(Y/N)? Are you okay?” He asked softly. 

(Y/N) glanced up at him before his attention shifted to the full-body mirror that rested beside the dresser. He tilted his body so the light from his bedside table illuminated his naked torso. In the warm light, he was able to get a better look at his chest. He smiled.

“Cas! Look,” he gestured to the mirror. 

Castiel stepped closer to him, gaze locked on the mirror. He paid close attention to his chest to see what had caused the sudden happiness in his partner. The presence of smaller hairs scattered precariously around his upper torso was evident in the light. When he glanced up at (Y/N), he noticed that the smile that had been on his face had somehow widened. 

“My chest hairs finally came in! I thought it was gonna take, at least, a couple more months.”

Castiel grinned. “That’s wonderful, (Y/N).” He studied the hairs more closely. “Will they continue to grow?”

“Probably. They should grow a lot thicker, and maybe a little bit longer.”

Castiel stared at him with adoration. Wordlessly, he reached up, cupped (Y/N)’s cheeks, and kissed him. (Y/N) raised his brows, but immediately returned the kiss. The kiss was long and light, filled with love. When Castiel pulled back, (Y/N) slowly opened his eyes. 

“What was that for?” He asked quietly, reaching a hand up to caress Castiel’s.

Castiel hesitated before he let out a sigh. “Admittedly, I was rather nervous about this whole process at first. I was unsure of what would happen and how it would affect you. I never want to see you hurt. However, I see how happy you are when you see yourself now. The negative thoughts you used to have about yourself diminished greatly, and you’re even more handsome than when we first met. I’ve come to realize that my love for you can, indeed, grow stronger, and it does so every day.”

(Y/N) could feel his heart and chest swell. If he was in a cartoon, he swore his pupils would turn into hearts.

“I love you, too, Cas,” He said softly as he wrapped his arms around his waist and laid his head against his chest. “More than you’ll ever know.”

*~*

(Y/N) had been in bed for three hours. Within the past week, he had started to experience bottom growth. Although he was excited to be able to start that part of his transition, to fully feel like his body was conforming to the person he was, he had to admit that the pain was more intense than he had originally anticipated. It wasn’t a constant pain, but when it arose, it felt like a dull, throbbing pain mixed with the sensation of a thousand needles simultaneously stabbing his clit. Painkillers worked for the first couple of days, but the relief gradually faded as the pain became more intense. No matter which way he sat down, stood, or laid down, nothing could dull the ache.

He had done some research on different forums about bottom growth, and he found that only a small - minuscule would be a more accurate word - amount of transmen experience full-on pain during bottom growth. So few that there was barely any information on how to relieve the pain. He could only assume that those people saw the thousands of comments claiming no one would have pain that they were too afraid to post about their own experience. He cursed himself for being so unlucky. His transition had been going so well. Of course there would be a hiccup. That was just his luck.

Perhaps it was similar to that of period cramps. Perhaps the intense pain would only last a while before it went away. Perhaps he was kidding himself. That he was the only transman to experience that level of discomfort. Perhaps that was just karma for thinking he could be a real man.

Fuck that. If pain was what it took to be a man, he was prepared to endure it, even if it killed him.

The icepack had turned warm and no longer provided relief. He had his eyes closed, head tilted back into the pillow, his fingers tangled tightly into his hair. A hiss passed his clenched teeth as another sharp pain attacked his nerves. As the pain slowly subsided, there was a light rasp on the door.

“Come in,” he groaned. 

The door opened a crack. Castiel poked his head into the room before he stepped inside. A worried look was prominent on his face as he closed the door and moved closer to the bed. 

“(Y/N), are you alright? Sam and Dean told me you’ve been in here for quite some time.” He asked, taking a seat next to him.

(Y/N) inhaled sharply as the dip of the bed caused discomfort to shoot between his legs. Castiel glanced between (Y/N)’s legs and his eyes.

“No, I’m not okay,” (Y/N) whined. “I started bottom growth and it hurts like Hell. I’m tired and hungry, but the aches are so bad that I don’t want to get up or go to sleep. I just want it all to pass,” 

Tears brimmed in the corners of his eyes as he ran his hand down his face. Castiel’s feeling of worry only intensified as he saw how (Y/N) had been affected. He shifted in his spot.

“(Y/N), I don’t like seeing you like this. Let me heal you,” he pleaded with him as he reached his index and middle finger towards his forehead.

(Y/N)’s eyes grew wide and he snatched Castiel’s wrist before he could be touched.

“Don’t you dare,” he growled, eyes narrowed and words dripped in venom.

Castiel raised his brows, taken aback by the tone of voice that was used. It was the first time (Y/N) had ever spoken to him like that.

“(Y/N), please, I can see how much you’re hurting. Let me take care of you.”

“No! Because I don’t know what your stupid angel juice will do to me. I’ve worked so hard to get where I’m at,” his voice was strained, broken.

“I just want you to be happy again.”

“I am happy!” (Y/N)’s loud voice echoed off the walls of the room as he sat up quickly.

He instantly regretted his movement when a painful shockwave struck his nerves. He clenched his jaw, cupped his crotch, and laid on his side, his back to Castiel. Castiel reached over to comfort him, but his hand was roughly shoved away. (Y/N) paid no mind to the expression of hurt Castiel had.

“I fought with myself my entire life to figure out who I am, and I fought even harder to get to where I am right now. If being in pain will turn me into the man I want to be, then so be it. Your father already made one mistake by putting me in the wrong body. I’m not going to sit here and let you reverse the progress I’ve made to finally fix his fuck-up.”

“(Y/N)-”

“No! I don’t want to hear it. Now get out.”

Castiel froze, surprised by the demand. It had been a while since he saw (Y/N) so angry, and the last time wasn’t even directed toward him. He never raised his voice at Castiel. Sure, they had their spats here and there, as most couples do, but they never shouted at one another. They knew how to talk about their problems, work through them, and discuss the way that they felt, something a decent amount of relationships lack. This was a whole new experience for Castiel.

He hated it.

At first, he contemplated talking to (Y/N) again. Try to convince him to take his offer to heal him. He hated seeing his partner in such a painful state, the same as at the end of any hunt. Castiel’s first instinct would be to heal him. To make the pain go away. To be able to see the smile he adored so much, which was hidden by the layers of agony he was experiencing. Alas, in the end, he decided against it. Instead, he opted to follow (Y/N)’s wants. He stood slowly, and quietly, from his spot on the bed and walked over to the door. His eyes never left (Y/N), his mind performing one last battle with itself, the urge to speak overwhelming. He held the desire back as he opened the door and left the room.

*~*

The library was quiet. Sam and Dean sat on either side of one of the tables, Sam with a pile of books laid out in front of him and Dean with his laptop and a small bowl of snacks. The occasional sound of pages being turned and the mouse pad click filled the room. Aside from the occasional small talk, they said nothing. Castiel entered the room, and their attention turned to him.

“Hey Cas,” Dean greeted.

“Hey Cas, how is he?” Sam followed up.

Castiel walked over to the table and sat down to the left of Dean. A sigh escaped his lips as he slouched in the seat, his folded hands resting on his stomach. He had a visibly defeated look on his face as he took some time to answer Sam’s question.

“He is in a lot of pain. I attempted to heal him, but he wouldn’t let me. He got upset with me and kicked me out of the room. I’ve never seen him so angry before.” Castiel shook his head.

Sam and Dean stared at him for quite some time.

“You tried to heal him?” Dean asked.

“Yes,” Castiel confirmed. “He is in a lot of pain. I am certain I can make it go away.”

“Cas, he doesn’t want to be healed,” Sam said.

“I realize that, Sam.”

“No, I don’t think you do. I can tell you’re still upset about the whole thing. What (Y/N) is going through right now is a normal part of the transition. Granted, he has it a Hell of a lot worse than most, but, that’s why we called you. We thought you would be able to come over and comfort him.”

“I thought healing him would be comforting. It was supposed to make him feel better. To get him back to normal.”

“See? ‘Back to normal’. Don’t you see how that can be misconstrued?”

Castiel looked at him curiously. “I do not.”

“Well, what you see as something to be healed, (Y/N) doesn’t. He’s very proud of the pain he’s in. He views it as an accomplishment. To heal him and take that pain away, it would be as if you’re stripping him of that achievement.”

“Sam’s right,” Dean chimed in. “When he first noticed the bottom growth, he came to us saying, ‘Guys! Guys! I have a dick now!’.” Dean mocked with a smile, causing Sam and Castiel to grin as well. “And then, when the pain started, and we began to get worried, he would say, ‘It hurts like Hell, but I still have a dick’. He was still happy about it, even though it hurt.”

Castiel nodded, considering their words. “I see,” he trailed. “I know that this was a big deal for (Y/N), but I didn’t comprehend why he was willing to go through the pain. I understand, now, that it’s because he’s finally happy with himself and the progress he has made. The way I worded my concern for his wellbeing made it appear as if I wanted to reverse the work he has done.”

“Exactly!” Sam nodded.

“I would never want that, though. (Y/N) appears to be in the best mindset I have ever seen him in, and I wouldn’t want to jeopardize that. I would never reverse the progress, even if I could.”

“We understand that. We know how much you love him-”

“Yeah, it’s kind of gross,” Dean mumbled.

Sam sighed. “As I was saying, we know how much you love him, and we recognize you would never say or do anything to threaten that progress, but when someone is in a lot of pain, they don’t always think clearly. Take Dean for example. When I have to stitch him up after a hunt, he says some pretty mean shit to me, but he never means it.”

“At least that’s what I let him think,” Dean whispered to Castiel just loud enough for Sam to hear.

Sam ran his fingers through his hair. “Dean, you’re not helping.”

“Sorry,” Dean cleared his throat and leaned back in his chair.

“(Y/N) is still head-over-heels in love with you.” Sam turned back to Castiel. “Pain can just make us say some stupid stuff. It would probably be best to give each other some space right now, think about what we discussed, and talk to one another tomorrow.”

“I think that is a good idea,” Castiel said as he stood from the table and brushed off his trenchcoat. “Will you keep me informed on how he is throughout the day?”

“Of course, man, yeah,” Sam smiled up at him, which Castiel was quick to return.

“Thank you. I will be on my way, then.”

“Where are you going?”

“To retrieve some of (Y/N)’s favorite treats to give to him. I’m hoping that might make him feel better.”

Sam’s smile widened. “That’s a good idea.”

*~*

It took (Y/N) over two hours to be able to fall asleep. The pain hadn’t been constant, but with how exhausted he was and the tears burning in the corner of his eyes, all he could do was lay there and think. He couldn’t believe the audacity that Castiel had to ask if he wanted to be healed. Scratch that. Castiel hadn’t even asked if he wanted it. He had simply told (Y/N) that he was going to heal him. He didn’t need that, though. He didn’t need to be fixed. (Y/N) was perfect the way he was, even if some things still needed to be tweaked. Nothing about him was broken. Therefore, nothing needed to be fixed.

Perhaps he was overthinking Castiel’s intentions. Truly, he never meant what (Y/N) interpreted it as, right? Castiel loved (Y/N), even though his physical attributes were changing, right? Of course, he did, otherwise, he wouldn’t have practically begged to heal him. Right?

With the image of Castiel’s pain-filled eyes in his mind, he couldn’t help but feel a tinge of guilt swell in his stomach. 

He had never snapped at Castiel before. He didn’t think Castiel deserved it. Especially now. All he had tried to do was make him feel better - in Castiel’s own way - and (Y/N) took the anger he had for the pain out on him. How could he do that to him? The shame was eating him up inside. There wasn’t much he could do, though. The aches and pains made any desire to move or speak vanish. He knew he had to apologize, to make things right, but it would have to wait until he felt better. 

Eventually, after another round of pain, (Y/N) could feel the exhaustion wash over him. His eyelids slid shut, and it didn’t take long for slumber to come.

*~*

The pain was more bearable when he awoke. It was more of a dull throb rather than needle-like stabbing. He was able to move around with mild discomfort. Even though he was more mobile, the exhaustion from the day before was still very much present, despite the hours of sleep he had gotten. The desire to crawl into his bed once more was intense. Thankfully, the lack of a hunt made that possible. So, as soon as he awoke, he got up, grabbed himself a water bottle, painkillers, and snacks, and retreated to his room.

While the pain had subsided substantially, his thoughts were clearer than before. He was able to think back to the spat he had with Castiel in greater detail and understanding. With a mind free of any pain-influenced thoughts, he felt even more guilty than he had before he slept. The hurt he had seen in Castiel’s eyes was practically burned into his soul. The only other time Castiel had looked at him with those eyes was when he was on the brink of death after a hunt gone wrong. He never wanted to be the cause for that look. He shouldn’t have snapped. Not at Castiel. Never at Castiel.

As he lay in bed, he pulled out his phone, brought up Castiel’s contact, and texted him.

Hey, babe. Could you come to our room when you get the chance, please?

He placed the phone onto his lap and began to nibble on the nail of his thumb. He couldn’t think of anything else. Nothing could shift his attention away from the problem at hand. Even if he tried to occupy himself with mindless scrolling or one of his hobbies, he didn’t think he would be able to concentrate on anything else. The whole disaster could have been avoided had (Y/N) thought about Castiel’s intentions rather than his insecurities. That was one of the character flaws he had to work on.

It wasn’t long before three soft knocks echoed against the wooden door, and (Y/N)’s head whipped up.

“Come in,” he said.

Just like before, the door opened a crack and Castiel poked his head inside before entering the room. Instead of the worried look he had before, it was replaced by intense nerves. Not only that, but, in his hands, Castiel held a small, decorative box, some items poking out of the top. The box was the least of (Y/N)’s worries.

“Good morning,” Castiel greeted, almost cautiously. “How are you feeling today?”

“A bit better. A little achy, but nothing like it was yesterday.”

“I’m glad.”

They sat in silence. (Y/N) still laid back on the bed while Castiel stood a couple of feet from him. The guilt only intensified. To think that Castiel was nervous to get closer to him because of his outburst broke his heart. Rightfully so. He patted the spot next to him on the bed. Castiel took the silent invitation and moved over to him. As he got closer, (Y/N)’s attention shifted to the box.

“What’s in there?” He asked quietly.

Castiel looked down at the box and then back at him. “It’s some of your favorite snacks,” he said and held out the box to him. “I figured it would make you feel better.”

Carefully, (Y/N) took the box from him and examined the contents. Inside were, indeed, some of his favorite snacks and candies. The guilt was killing him. He gave a small smile and set the box to the side.

“Thank you.”

“Of course,” Castiel gingerly sat beside him on the bed, careful of the way it shifted under his weight. “(Y/N), I wanted to apologize-”

“No, Cas,” (Y/N) interrupted. “You don’t have to apologize for anything, okay? I should be the one to apologize for what happened.”

(Y/N) turned his body in the bed, his face contorting slightly to a look of discomfort from the ache and settled for laying on his side so he could face Castiel.

“I should have never yelled at you like that. I should have never yelled at you at all. You were only trying to help. I realize that now, and I’m so sorry for the way I treated you.”

Castiel nodded. “Sam informed me that my intentions might have been misconstrued because of the pain.”

“They were at the time. The pain clouded my judgment and, in a sense, it made me assume you wanted to get rid of my bottom growth altogether. I know that’s impossible, and I don’t know what could have made me think otherwise. If you were capable of changing me to that extent, I would have asked you months ago to use your grace on me instead of taking hormones,” he let out a dry chuckle. “But, Cas, I hope you know that my being in pain doesn’t give me a reason to talk to you the way that I did.”

“I understand,” He replied, gaze cast down.

“Hey, look at me,” (Y/N) reached over and, using his index and middle fingers, turned Castiel’s head so that their eyes were connected. “You don’t deserve to be talked to like that, especially by me. I was a terrible boyfriend at that moment.”

“No, you weren’t,” Castiel shook his head as he grasped both of (Y/N)’s hands in his. “I’ve had time to reflect, and, if I’ve learned anything from my time on Earth, it’s that people make mistakes. It’s okay to make those mistakes as long as you take accountability for them. I took accountability for my mistake, and you took accountability for yours.”

“You’re right, accountability is very important, and people do make mistakes, but those mistakes shouldn’t hurt the ones we love. I love you, Castiel, more than you’ll ever truly know. You’ve stood by my side through every second of my transition and have continued to show your undying love and support for me, even when I’m a dick to you. You even got me a damn basket of my favorite snacks, even after what I did,” Tears streaked down his cheeks, and his voice began to quiver as he spoke. “You are so kind and caring and compassionate, and I don’t deserve you.”

“Stop,” Castiel reached a hand up and used his thumb to brush the tears away from his cheeks. “(Y/N), I love you, too. More than I ever thought possible. You deserve everything, and I wish I could give it to you. It hurt me so much to see you in pain, that I didn’t even consider your feelings. That was selfish of me, but, I know, from now on, I will consider what you want before I consider anything else.”

(Y/N) sniffled. “Oh, Cas, you’re not selfish. You are the most selfless person I have ever met. The fact that you care so much about me is one of the reasons why I fell in love with you in the first place. I wouldn’t change it for the world. I just need to learn to keep my damn mouth shut when you’re trying to be nice,” he chuckled and leaned his forehead against Castiel’s. “Can you forgive me?”

Castiel opened his mouth to protest, to say that (Y/N) didn’t need to be forgiven, but he took a page out of his newly found book of social knowledge and gave him a small smile. “Yes, I forgive you. Do you forgive me?”

(Y/N) attempted to do the same, to say that Castiel had done nothing wrong, to repeat the same line he had just preached. But he just copied the smile and gave a faint nod. “I forgive you.” He whispered as he leaned over and kissed him sweetly.

The kiss lasted a couple of seconds before they pulled away, enjoying their sweet embrace. (Y/N) shifted on the bed to get more comfortable and, again, winced when the ache returned. Castiel took notice, his eyes roaming (Y/N)’s body.

“Are you alright? Would you like me to get you anything?” He asked.

(Y/N) shook his head. “No, babe, thank you. Maybe we could just lie in bed together for a bit while I snack on the treats you got me?”

Castiel smiled. “That sounds like a great idea.”

The two of them adjusted themselves in the bed so Castiel was laid on his back and (Y/N) was laid on his side. His head and hand rested on his chest while Castiel’s arm was wrapped around his shoulders. (Y/N) reached over, grabbed one of the many bags of candy, and sat it between them. They sat in a comfortable silence, wrapped in each other’s embrace, never wanting to let go.

Everyone seeks some type of support and comfort from others. Whether it be family, friends, partners, coworkers, or complete strangers, the strength and stability of the human race depend on the support of others in some way, shape, or form. (Y/N) was lucky enough to be put in a situation where he was surrounded by people who loved and appreciated him for who he was. Despite the trials and tribulations of the past and the ones yet to come, he knew he always had loved ones in his life to fall back on in times of trouble. 

And (Y/N) would cherish that for as long as he lived.

[spectres-fulcrum]

Now I have to jump from 1777 to ca. 333 BC cause apparently Netflix has an Alexander The Great half seriously acted/half docu series coming out Wednesday and Alexander the Great was my Thing sophomore year of high school(The trailer is EVERYTHING). They better do his relationship with Hephaestion right(queerly)

They were VERY in love and very obviously. Idk why it's a debate after anyone reads how Alexander reacted to Hephaestion's death(There's more but I can't remember atm)

We had an unit on ATG in World History and I wanted to google something in whatever documentary we were watching(I think it was Alexander and Hephaestion making an offering to Achilles and Patroclus) and it led me to finding out there was speculations Alex and Phai were queer and a thing and me just recently realizing I liked girls along with boys was really like. Obsessed.

That's me though. I find out things are queer and I get obsessed. I love non queer stuff too and get obsessed but. It's just like my new AmRev phase was ignited by the Hamilton-Laurens letters that are sus as fuck. Sus as fuck as I'm like yet to find a reasonable het explanation as to why Laurens was encouraging Hammie to find a wife as a cure for his devotion to Laurens.

Under the cut is more me unlocking more memories

Of course, I watched the 2004 Alexander, with Colin Farrell and Jared Leto. They are still my celebrity conspiracy theory of they fell in love during filming and had an on and off thing for a few years and it crashed and burned(That's a very very very long essay spanning several albums because Jared Leto is still clearly extremely fucked up by it see: Never Not Love You but also Love These Days). The Babylon balcony scene was gorgeous! And I loved the flashback to Aristotle teaching all the boys. And we at least got Princess Barsine-Stateira even if we didn't get the rest of the family. For books I think The Conqueror's Wife was my favorite as I loved writing from Drypetis' pov(Hephaestion's wife, Darius' daughter. I headcanoned Bagoas as her best friend though and they were all very poly and friends besides Roxana. I was probably too mean to Roxana looking back) and she was a narrator for that book. I remember reading it on a trip down to the German Christmas market. My teacher always splurged for coach buses so it was an extra nice bus ride read. That was senior year though, when it came out. I still had nook back then, not kindle.

I think our ATG unit coincided with state testing week which is part of why we watched a documentary because my history teacher knew we'd be frazzled and classes were all messed up with that week. not that it matters but it's also is like. Placing things.

Looking at the character list on IMDB(assuming it's legit) I'm like some of these people I need reminders but I'm also like Memnon! (There was an AlexPhai fic where Memnon kidnapped Phai and they grew fond of each other) Ptolemy! Queen Stateira! Hephaestion! And once I gave it some thought I was like X and Y were Phillip's generation and didn't Z kill Darius?

Yep. I need to do some review tomorrow though. God it's gonna feel good. Honestly the trailer was so exciting I was like Alexander! Phillip's death! Darius! Darius with Stateira! IS THAT SISYGAMBIS!?!?!?!?!? (IDK but I'm gonna freak if we get Sisygambis. What if we get precious little Ochus? Drypetis? Bagoas? Please at least give us the canon queer kiss with Bagoas)

[jay-and-dean]

I don’t need you  Chapter 6 : Wild cat

Dean x reader

Summary : She’s a warrior, she’s a loner. Nothing can stop her, nothing ever had. She doesn’t need Dean, does she ?

This is a request by @magssteenkamp​ that I decided to turn to a serie, see the original request on the serie Masterlist.

Serie Warnings : Swearing (duh). Mention of death. Smut, probably all kind from rough to fluffy, I’ll precise in the chapters if there are specific warnings. Fluff. Angst of course.

Chapter warnings :  Swearing. SMUT, a hint of Dom!Dean, kinda Brat/brat tamer vibe. Unprotected sex (You’re smarter than this). Horny Dean. Violence with a hint of cruelty. Mention of past murder and abuse.

Words : 3.2 k

Note : I’ll try to stick to the 3k rule, like for Rescue You

If everything goes as planned, you’ll get one chapter every wednesday (Thanks to @magssteenkamp, I call it WednesJay, lol. Sorry okay, I shut up).

***Want to read more ? => MASTERLIST***

*** I don’t need you MASTERLIST***

_________________________________

6.     WILD CAT

 Dean’s Pov

             Living with a woman…

           Living with Y/n.

           No one warned me. Living with a girl, and a girl you want. I never knew that.

           In my life, I lived with Sam, with my dad, I “lived” in Hell and Purgatory. And in my car for months. I have shared rooms with Cas, and occasionally with other hunter friends during hunts before Sam came back. And for one year, I lived with Lisa, but it was different. It was her house, she was my girlfriend and I was… depressed. And Lisa, she… She was not Y/n, she didn’t have that effect on me.

           Now is very different. The bunker is my home for real, and Y/n… I have no idea why this woman makes me loose my mind like that. I want her. I crave her. And since I had her, it’s way worse, it’s unbearable... And now she’ everywhere.

           She’s not invasive, not at all, she’s even discreet, and like I expected, very independent. Like a cat you only see when she needs to eat or walks in the same room as you… A cat you can’t touch because you can feel she’s still totally wild and has claws.

But she’s here. And every little thing brings me to the memory of her strong thighs crushing my hips in ecstasy.

           The bedroom we gave her smells like her, and when I walk to mine, I hear her music on the way, muffled behind her door. That third toothbrush in the bathroom, and the smell of wax. The books she reads all day, eager to devour all bunker’s knowledge, and she forgets everywhere she goes.

Maybe the worst is hearing her sorry voice saying she will hurry when I find the bathroom door closed ; imagining her behind the door, maybe naked, maybe brushing her wet hair or whatever…

           I really should focus on our researches to find a way to get rid of that vampire mafia, but I can’t really focus on anything lately. The contacts we have, the leads… It goes nowhere for now and I should work harder.

           I walk to the kitchen and find her there, she’s wearing that sweatpants she took off to straddle me. Her back is on me, her head is low, she’s reading something, and my eyes fall on the curve between her lower back and her butt.

           Was it bad ? Sex with me ? Was it disappointing ?

Don’t be so ridiculous Dean. Overthinking everything like a stupid teen. Do you think because a woman had sex with you, she would want more ? Why would she ? Not because you are obsessed with her, she would want anything to do with you…

Look at her. She doesn’t need a man, she doesn’t need anyone.

           I haven’t had my first coffee yet, and I’m already losing my freaking mind. She’s there, she’s right there, and I know how she feels around me now...

“Hey” I greet her, trying to sound casual.

“Hi Dean” she turns around, a book in one hand as usual, a cup of coffee in the other. “I made coffee.”

I take a mug and pour some of that extremely strong coffee she makes every morning. Strong like her, black like that leather corset she wears in the battle field. That freaking corset that was drying on the bathroom the other day, that tight… Black… piece of clothing..

“I may have found a job, lame job but still. At the gas station” she says putting the book about demonic possession on the table.

“A job ?”

Why would she want a job ?

“Yeah, so I can pay my… you know my stuff, food and all” she shrugs. “Don’t worry, it doesn’t mean I’m settling in.”

I wouldn’t mind.

“I told you we had fake credit cards. If you need anything, just take the one I gave you.”

“Dean…” she smiles kindly, taking a sip of her coffee and I realize I just love my name on her lips. “Fake credit cards are a privilege for hunters, because you can’t risk your life at the other end of the country and have a job, you protect civilians… I’m not even a hunter. I’m a freaking vampire slayer.”

“Well, Buffy, Sam found a case, would you come with us ? Or do you really want to work at that gas station ?” I smile wide, showing teeth, trying to stop looking at her naked thigh sticking out of the table.

“What kind of case ?” she asks nonchalantly.

           Looking at her innocent expression, I can’t help but think of what happened. She… She freaking straddled me and took me right there… Since then… Nothing.

           It’s like nothing ever happened between us, like I never came deep inside of her, like I didn’t want her. She knows I wanted her, she felt it, and I felt her need, I heard her pleas on the phone and I saw her beautiful orgasm on her face... Now nothing. Except I’m going crazy.

           She seems to think hard, and finally answers.

“Okay. Let’s hunt with the legendary Winchesters” she chuckles. “When do we leave ?”

“As soon as you’re ready, Sweetheart” I state, using that nickname on purpose.

 Reader’s Pov

             Eyeliner.

Those dark eyes look back at me in the mirror, their black line making them harder, colder, and those stern pupils I was so used to. I tighten the cords of my corset, strangely loving the strong feeling of being held so strong, and the pressure on my spine.

I remember the first time I dressed like this. I was way too young, sixteen maybe or even less, and I needed to infiltrate that club. A really shady club...

I couldn’t afford clothes, I could barely afford food ; so I borrowed a corset from that prostitute that gave me food once or twice, Silvia. She hid me from her pimp several times, and told me to never take free drugs and to stay away from men in general… She was nice with me, and she’s probably one of the reasons (with the Supernatural books) I never gave up to selling myself when fear and hunger were unbearable.

I had never worn anything else than that dirty hoodie I slept and lived in for years, and it was the first time I could actually dress up and look in a mirror, hurrying in her bathroom while Silvia wasn’t home. I used her makeup too…

I felt so strong when I left her shitty apartment, for once I had made a choice, for once I was in charge… I killed two vampires that night.

And Silvia was found dead before I gave her the corset back, one of her “client” decided rough wasn’t enough, he decided the bruises and the humiliations would be more pleasant if those fucking rapes ended up in murder…

I found him. I killed that son of a bitch.

But the time after she died was the worst of my life. Not just because no one gave food to me through the window, because after discovering monsters are real the hard way… I was discovering the worst monsters are human. And those monsters, there was no Winchesters to burn them. I was too young and I lost all hope…

But I had that corset and a sharp knife. So I decided, as long as I had that, I will make their blood flow… And I did.

A wave of sadness goes through me thinking that corset burned in my apartment, the original one, Silvia’s memory.

That is what Dean doesn’t know about me. That is the reason I can’t let go to that desire I feel for him. Not only I have to stay away from this naivety that made the child inside me crush on him, because naivety is weakness and weakness is death…

But also, he wants to see me as a hunter… And what I am is a killer.

 I get out of the bathroom and walk to the war room with the bag they gave me to pack my things. I don’t have much, but I really don’t need a lot, the only thing is…

“Could one of you lend me a jacket ?” I say, putting my bag on the table. “My coat burnt and...”

Dean jumps from his sit, nodding, and walks pass me.

“Won’t be as fitted as your clothes though” he states, eyeing my cleavage for a second.

“That really doesn’t matter” I assure him.

           When he comes back, he hands me that beautiful dark blue jacket he wears a lot. And I feel like a freaking cliché when our fingers touch, and even more when I wrap myself in that jacket of his. The little scared teen in me screaming in my head.

           But that teen is dead a long time ago, and I intend that she stays dead.

 Dean’s Pov

             Y/n is fierce against vampires, but she’s just as much against any other monster.

           Since we left home, we have solved one case after another, without any break like Sam and I did some times, mostly when one of us needed to unwind for some reason.

           This time, all of us do need relief, for different reasons. And we make the best team… ever.

           Everything is perfect, her sharp mind completes Sam’s brain, and her formidable fighting skills make our trio almost invulnerable.

           And after the job is done, drinking a glass of whiskey with her really feels like hanging out with my best friends.

           Y/n fights like this ghost, like this ghoul, like this shapeshifter was precisely the one who killed her parents. She is an efficient killer, if she decides that you’re dead, your head hits the floor before you realize it. It’s a freaking execution.

And watching her using those moves, both smooth and sharp to end the worst creatures of the universe makes me all dizzy every time.

           She’s graceful in her ferocity and hunting with her adds something Sam and I never had, not even with Cas or Jack or anyone : an action movie vibe or something like that ; I think I never enjoyed hunting that much.

And I have to admit none of it helps with my obsession. I didn’t know I could be hard as steel while burning a corpse…

But as efficient as she is, able to kill without more than one stroke, she can also enjoy it�� cruelly.

She’s like a cat that could end that mouse with a single bite, but plays with it a little.

She’s fucking scary.

Right now, the mouse is a 240lbs werewolf with a special taste for captivity and young hearts. He and his friend made their own little reserve in his basement, but it took us less than six hours to find who they were.

She broke his knee, stabbed him in the back, and watches him try to crawl to the forest now. She’s smiling wide, her face covered in red dots from the throat she cut just before.

“Crawl, crawl little bad wolf” she hums, turning around him like a shark.

“Dean” Sam tries to get me out of fascination, I know he things we should end the beast but I’m not giving her orders… It’s her pray.

My eyes are on her and I can’t really move, fascinated by her every move.

This woman is not like anybody else, and that monster massacre we’re on for a few weeks, it got me high on blood and on her. My body is filled with adrenaline, I’m horny and hungry constantly, my few hours of sleep are so deep I feel like dying every night…

“Y/n !” Sam calls her and she turns toward us.

I know my pupils dilate when her burning eyes find mine.

“Kill him” my brother almost whines.

She sighs, walking toward the car behind us, she hands me the gun when she walks pass me. It doesn’t entertain her anymore.

           I take three quick steps to him and put a bullet in the werewolf’s head. Sam puts three little drops of that magic oil she taught him to do, says the incantation, and the body catches fire. That fire that wont spread, but that won’t stop until nothing is left of his target. This thing changed our life…

             Tonight, Y/n has a room of her own.

When we can, we try to give her some privacy, and I have to sleep in a room so boring… a room that doesn’t have her in it.

“Y/n is really good” my brother says, putting his bag on his bed, but I know something bothers him. “And… I mean, with her we save twice more people.”

“But ?” I ask sternly, grabbing a beer in the fridge.

“She really likes to kill, Dean.”

“I do to, Sammy” I state honesty, able to admit it without a flinch now.

“I mean, don’t get me wrong” Sam ignores me. “I know she’s a good person and she proved a thousand times already that saving people was the real goal for her too. But she’s… I don’t know, wild ?”

When he says that, my heart misses a beat. She’s wild, yes, and she awakens something in me that I didn’t know.

“I feel like hunting with a time bomb sometimes” he sighs.

“I’ll talk to her” I say, ignoring the confused look on his face.

Of course, that was not what he was expecting, like you could just tell someone they’re a time bomb… But Y/n and I, we have a special relationship, and I really feel like I can tell her anything.

             I knock and she opens with her gun in her hand, smiling when she comes face to face with me.

“You need something ?” she asks, letting me in.

“Just talking” I state.

“Okay” she frowns. “I’ll take my shower, after. Whiskey ?”

I nod and she takes a big sip directly the bottle, handing it to me.

“Sam thinks you’re a time bomb” I declare with no introduction, drinking way too much from that bottle.

She freezes, chuckling a little with her eyebrows raised.

“Sammy’s afraid of me now ?”

“He’s not afraid” I grunt, feeling the alcohol increase my desire for her. “He thinks you’re wild.”

“Wild, huh ?” she laughs, a mocking expression in her voice and on the corner of her lips.

I want to make it disappear from her pretty face, I need to see this grin turn into that ecstasy face that looks like a slight pain. I lick my lips.

“Well Sweetheart, you are” my voice is suddenly lower and she starts searching my face.

“And is that a bad thing ?” she shrugs.

I get up, and come near her, feeling my blood boil in a feeling between an inexplicable anger and a raging desire.

“Are you untamable, tigress ?” I groan, my eyes going from her bloody cleavage to her amused face. “Do you think it’s funny ?”

“A little, yes” she chuckles when I make her walk back. “What do you think you’re doing, Caveman ?”

           I lose control of my hands and grip her waist, my nails digging in the black leather of that damn corset, crushing her body with mine against the wall.

           When I try to kiss her lips, she turns her head slightly, offering me her jaw to bite instead, and I do. She doesn’t want kisses, she doesn’t want anything tender. I would love to give her more than sex, but so be it…

           My hand finds her neck, taking it to keep her still and she groans.

           Her hands fly to the thigh holster she’s still wearing and grab her gun. In a split second, the barrel is pressed against my temple, but I don’t flinch.

“I could kill you just like that, Winchester” she groans and I still don’t move.

“Go ahead, tigress. Kill me.”

She smiles hand I start nibbling at her naked shoulders with that gun still on my head, rubbing myself on her like a freaking dog in heat, groaning in her ear, my thumb spreading the mix of blood and sweat on the side of her burning neck.

           When I let go of her neck to start undoing her pants, she bends and bites my shoulder, hard enough to make me scream in pain and wrap my hands around her throat again.

“Freaking cat” I grunt, struggling with her belt with only one hand.

           When I finally manage to open it, I slip my finger in it and she lets the gun fall loudly on the floor. My hand finds her folds, and a grin appears on my face.

“You’re soaked, how surprising is that ?” I let out in a growl, slipping my middle finger through her folds, teasing her clit and entrance.

“Fuck you, hunter” she groans, but a desperate moan escapes her lips and my cock twitches so hard it hurts. So I let go of her delicious pussy, the smell of her arousal coming out of her panties along with my fingers.

           With my shaking free hand, I almost rip my pants open and push it down, not realizing I’m squeezing her neck a little harder in my eagerness.

           Her face is red and her mouth agape, she licks her lips and another insolent smile appears on her beautiful face. I know I can’t let go of her or she will attack me or run away.

“Take your pants off” I command unable to do it myself, and she lets her head go back. “DO IT WILD CAT !”

           She pushes her jeans and panties down enough so I can take it off with my foot. And without losing another minute, I grab her thighs, spreading them for me, and carrying her.

“GRAH” she cries out when I enter her without any foreplay, burying myself between her throbbing walls in a sharp thrust.

           I could come right now, the tension accumulated in me for weeks making me as feral as she is in battle.

“Yes, fuck yes !” I moan is her neck, as I start to thrust toughly, banging her hips on the wall each time.

           She grabs my hair and tug at it hard, but I ignore the pain and keep chasing that ecstasy only her can give me so good.

“D-Dean…” she suddenly almost pleads, vulnerable.

I look up and notice she is struggling to breath.

“C-Corset” she whines.

Without withdrawing, I grab the knife on the table and brutally cut the lace caging her. The second I free her, she gasps and grabs my belt on the middle of my ass, encouraging me to take her harder.

           And I do.

           She can’t open her eyes now, her head back on the wall, her mouth open, and it’s too much for me to finally win that from her.

I reach my high so violently that I almost make the two of us fall, her hungry walls milking me strongly right away, her thighs shaking around me while her hands desperately try to push me.

“Y/N FUCK !” I yell, lost in both our orgasms mixing together.

             Panting in her neck, I dread the moment she will push me away. So I enjoy every single second against her skin like it was the last… It probably is anyway.

________________________

***FEEDBACK IS GOLD***

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[weekendwritingmarathon]

This weekly roundup includes fics written (at least in part) during the 1k1h sprints and/or the Weekend Writing Marathon events.

Fics are ordered first by fandom, then by word count from smallest to largest.

***

Behind Blue Eyes by @pherryt​

marvel || winterhawk || General || No major warnings apply || 5,272 words || Complete

Summary: Bucky thought when he gave in to Steve's pleading to leave Wakanda and live in Avengers Tower, the immense loneliness he felt would recede, but it only got stronger.

Other tags: deaf!Clint, touch starved, Soulmates, Music, cuddle piles, Nightmares, soft touches, Angst and Fluff, tower fic, post winter soldier, Canon Divergent, Found Family, Guitar, Clint singing

***

All Mixed Up by @pherryt​

marvel, supernatural, star trek, harry potter || winterhawk, destiel, mckirk || General || No major warnings apply || 30590 words || Complete

Summary: After the battle at Hogwarts, when the Dark Lord was finally defeated for good, Hogwarts needed to rebuild. With a little bit of help and some new ideas, the new headmistress does just that, opening the school to a broader range of students than Hogwarts has ever seen before.

Other tags: deaf!Clint, Magic, Hogwarts AU, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Wizards and Witches, Mention of Past Abuse, post Hogwarts battle, Sorting Hat, lucky (the dog), Body Swap, restructuring hogwarts, Multiple POV's, Secrets, Alpine (the cat), Ferret, Wings, Hurt!Jim, low self worth, supportive friends, Protective!Bucky

***

Into the Split: Into the Dream 3 by @tryslora​

Original Fiction (Welcome to PHU) || Seth/Nikolai (M/M) || Teen & up || Author chooses not to give major warnings || 2,741 / 73,695 words || WIP

Summary: Even after not quite two weeks, Nikolai feels settled here. Havenhill has become home, and he is loathe to leave it because there’s an all too real chance that he might never see it again.

Other tags: Dreams, Magic

***

the past haunts the future by @tryslora​

Original Fiction (Welcome to PHU) || Colt/Leo (M/M) || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 2,923 words || Complete

Summary: Emma's worried about her new friends, and Colt & Leo try to reassure her. Although the news Emma has is indeed concerning.

Other tags: Short Story, Foster Kids, Light Angst, Past Relationships

***

Mark it Up by Hermit9

Supernatural, Shadowrun || Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester/Original Female Character(s) || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 6,691 words || Complete

Summary: Dean was planning something. Castiel knew this because Dean was broadcasting it as loud as the darkened skies announced the wind of the storm and as wide as the news cycle when it went for the spin. Dean was planning something, and Castiel didn't know what it was.

Other tags: Medical Procedures. Medical Misery. Sickness. Broken Bones. Childbirth. Cas is having a bad week. Fainting. Domestic Fluff. Threesome - F/M/M. Shibari. Blindfolds. Pegging. OFC sex worker. hints of jealousy. Oral Sex. Happy Ending. Smut

***

Every Monster That Sleeps Inside You (chapter 14) by Treefrogie84

Supernatural || destiel, drowley, drowstiel || Mature || Graphic descriptions of violence || 5,452 words (in current chapter) || WIP

Summary: Attempting the trials to close Hell lets loose something far worse than the occasional crossroads demon or Dean’s second favorite drinking buddy. Heaven wants all the tablets they can get their hands on, Abaddon wants to destroy everything in favor of utter chaos in Hell as well as on Earth, and somehow, Sam and Dean have to stop all of it. Except stopping Abaddon might take more from Dean than he can afford to give. A Mark of Cain fix-it starting at 8.12 As Time Goes By.

Other tags: canon typical violence, carver era rewrite, MoC!Dean, demon!Dean, Abaddon, Gadreel, canon divergent

***

Unspoken Words by @pherryt​

Supernatural || destiel || General || No major warnings apply || 17741 words || Complete

Summary: The Winchesters, Castiel and Rowena all have baggage - people recently lost to them and traumas endured - but it takes the sudden appearance of a strange girl in their bunker to finally get them talking.

Other tags: mute character, Portals, spells, Accidental Therapy, Bunker Fic, Talking, Eavesdropping, Confessions, Tea, Coping Mechanisms, expectations, envy, low self worth, Healing, inspired by a MASH episode, Mentions of past abuse

***

Have you posted a fic recently?  Any active WWM participant can Submit your fic here by midnight EST Wednesday and it will be included on next Friday’s WWM Fic Roundup post.

[hnrywinchester]

French Press My Buttons

Pairing/Characters: Gabriel x Reader, Castiel

Warnings: Coffee Shop AU, Human!AU, one SHY boy, flirting, slow burn, bad coffee drink names/puns, from Gabe’s POV. It’s cliche and cheesy. You’re warned.

Words: 4.833

Beta’d by: @aquietuniverse

Castiel and Gabriel own a quaint coffee shop downtown. What’s Gabriel to do when one patron catches his eye? Nothing. The answer is nothing... until it’s something.

Wednesday 8:12 AM “Cas! Cas, Cas, Cas, can you work the counter? Please, just for like… ten minutes?” Gabriel fretted, dropping the metal frothing pitcher to the counter. “Uh… sure,” Castiel agreed, side eyeing his brother and longtime co-worker skeptically. It was 8:12 AM, on a Wednesday, which meant she was coming in anytime within the next five minutes. With her messy top knot, and one size too big jacket. She’d order the usual, plain coffee with cream and three sugars, go sit at the high top in the far corner, right in front of the window with a book and he’d hide behind the espresso machine until she left at 8:53 to catch the bus that would pull up right outside the doors. It was like clockwork, a perfectly calculated arrangement of avoidance and complete awkwardness. This had been going on for eight months now, every Tuesday through Saturday, between 8:13 and 8:17 AM. 

Bean There Done That

“Bean There, Done That?” she inquired, walking up to the counter with a smile, “Coffee with Hazelnut and Coconut? I don’t know about that, Cas…” Her hair was down today. She never wore it down. Gabriel whipped around, turning his back to the register as he composed himself. This was unexpected. She was right, maybe coconut and hazelnut weren’t a good mix, what was he thinking? It sounded like a good idea at the time. He really needed to start trying things before offering them up, but last night was Monday, which meant he had to mentally prepare for another week of… this. He busied himself making her drink, not even noticing she had yet to order it. Their small talk went unnoticed by him as he measured out her sugar, not one grain too many, his heart hammering in his chest. He was going to have to turn and look at her in a second, get it together! Nope, he couldn’t do it. Keeping his eyes averted, he turned and slid the porcelain mug across the counter to her, her chiming laugh seeping into his head like a symphony. “Oh! I didn’t even order yet…” she mused and he could feel her eyes on him. Mentally kicking himself, he stammered his response, “This is for… um… me? I just, I’m putting it here, for… for later.” “Oh! Well, looks like we drink something pretty similar then.” “Ha, I’ll… what can we get you?” He’d managed eight months going under the radar, why did this have to happen today? Damn Cas and his babbling, throwing a wrench in the very strict routine. Did he not know there was a time and rhythm with this? No, he didn’t actually, but still. He shouldn’t be deviating from the course. If he thought his heart was hammering before, it was nothing compared to now. In the effort of good customer service, his gaze lifted from the counter and met with her own. He’d never seen her this up close, he’d been more of a marvel from afar kind of guy, very afar, as afar as he could get. “Just my usual,” she sang, putting exact change on the counter and sliding it over to Cas, her eyes however staying locked on Gabriel. “Uh, a coffee, three sugars and cream,” Cas rattled off, his eyebrows furrowed slightly in confusion. Yeah, he knew. Hey Mocha-Rena! It’d been three days since the unfortunate making-of-the-drink-before-the-order-was-placed incident, and he still hadn’t fully recovered. In fact, he didn’t even partially recover. Thankfully, today was Saturday, which meant he’d have two days of freedom to really compose himself and be ready for the next onslaught. “Oh… well I’ll give you credit, that one is pretty witty,” she complimented, reading over the chalkboard with the daily special on it, “Usual please, Cas.” He was waiting for the day that Cas threw him under the bus and told her that he had no part in making these ridiculous drinks, it was all Gabriel. His routine was making himself into wallpaper as soon as she walked in, hers was teasing the daily special. All in a day’s work. She liked today's, though, first time she’d ever even seemingly appreciated it. He’d have to try even harder on Tuesday. At least he had a few days to prepare. Café Au La-La Medium Roast was her favorite. He’d deduced this by months of testing just which blend he made her drink with. She never specified, but he knew that this particular bean was the one. She always took one sip from the mug before turning to walk to her spot, and after calculating tests, trial and error, medium roast made her eyes linger closed for just a second longer than others. She hated dark roast, too bitter, her jaw had twitched when he’d used that one, so he scratched it off immediately. Light roast was okay, but not lingering eyes closed good. Then, there were the more flavored blends—he’d tried them all, but plain, old medium roast was the one. Beyond that, he’d experimented with cream temperature (ice cold, right from the fridge. He always made sure he didn’t leave it lingering on the counter from the 7-8 AM rush), made it drinkable right away, and as much as she claimed she wanted three sugars, she really wanted two and a half. He considered for a moment this was a little weird, creepy perhaps, but baristas were supposed to know their customers, right? Of course, he didn’t know anyone else this well. Sure, Joe got a double shot and Rebecca got any special involving hazelnut, but he couldn’t have rattled off their favorite blends. Okay… maybe it was a little weird… “Cold out there today, gentlemen! Make it extra hot for me,” she shivered, rubbing her hands together as the wind blew in behind her, “Café Au La-La… hmm.” Okay, so that one was a bust. Extra hot? The cream was chilled, how was he supposed to make it extra hot? He couldn’t put it in the microwave, it’d burn off some of the flavor. Open a new one! Nope, those were all in the fridge in the back. Well, he could stall a bit and just turn the temp on the urn, it would take maybe… ten minutes? “Ten minutes,” Gabriel mumbled to Castiel, praying to God he heard him. “What?” Cas questioned, face contorted in confusion. “It’s gonna be ten minutes!” Well that came out all wrong. All bad. The words were too fast, the tone too harsh. He didn’t even want to look at her, and he wouldn’t. Nope. This coffee urn needed his complete, undivided attention, possibly forever. Kiss Me Under the Mistle-Joe Christmas time brought a whole new rush. All the shoppers stopping into the café really put a dent in routine. A routine Gabriel was very much set in, for at least five days a week. Why did people shop at 8:30 AM? It made no sense. This was coming from the person who had… one person to buy for. His brother, who was standing five feet away, talking to her, who was here right on time. Except now, she had to wait in a long line, which kept her in his vicinity for longer than he could handle. Was she staring at him? He swore he could feel eyes in the back of his head, but that could be anyone. “Gabriel! Hey!” Paula announced as she strode in. Bad timing. Really, really bad timing, “Always nice to see you. Happy Holidays!” “Hey,” he greeted curtly, flicking his eyes over quickly, “yeah, merry merry.” “Kiss Me Under the Mistle-Joe huh? That’s a good one!” Oh no. She was gonna know it was him. His cover was blown. Maybe she was too caught up in her conversation with Cas and didn’t hear it. No way. He had to brave it, he had to turn and look. Slowly, stirring the frothing pitcher for… Hannah’s cappuccino, he spun on his heels, peeking at her expression through his brow. Her eyes were focused on her phone, okay… potentially crisis averted. “You okay? You seem a little down,” Paula continued, no fault of hers, he was typically lively and upbeat, “busy?” “Yeah,” he replied, spinning back to normal Y/N-in-the-building position, “Holiday rush.” “Aw, well if you need help, my offer still stands.” Go away, Paula. It was not the time. ‘Coffee, three sugars and cream.’ He’d kept a small pitcher in the fridge, knowing in the busier weeks he’d forget to put the bottle back to keep it that perfect temperature. Medium roast was going, two and half scoops of sugar. Yes. Perfect. With the shop as busy as it was, however, there was a small snag. He had to call her name out. Typically he’d force the task on Cas, but he was busy. Of course. A gaggle of teenagers had come in and oh the charming, handsome coffee shop man mentality had hit them, making them babble and giggle. It was tiresome. He cleared his throat, hoping he’d have enough volume to be heard over the bustle, “uh… Y/N…” he stammered. No way she heard it. God, he was gonna have to do it again. Pausing, his gaze ticked over to where she stood, but she wasn’t there. “Thanks,” he heard her chime, his eyes darting up in shock. Her eyebrows lifted in a particularly charming way as she smiled at him, her lips a perfect shade of bright red as she smiled against the white of the mug. Lipstick today. That was new. His heart caught in his throat; she was perfect. Cocoa Chanel Christmas was over, everything was back to normal. She was currently nestled into her corner of the café, her fingers splayed across a very worn copy of ‘Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas’. He hadn’t taken her for a Hunter S. Thompson girl, but clearly that book had some mileage on it. He couldn’t help but stare. He’d mustered the courage to turn around and look at her, so he might as well get his bravery’s worth. She had a tattoo on her forearm, he could see it peeking out from the lace detailing on her top. It was something intricately lined,  and he wanted to trace every one with his fingertips… It was like she could feel his eyes. Her head lifted from the tattered pages and turned towards him, no doubt finding him gawking from a distance. His body went rigid for a moment before dropping to the floor, like a bomb was about to go off in a foxhole, hands covering his head and all as his chest pressed into the hardwood. “What… are you doing?” Castiel asked, not willing to entertain his brother’s nonsense. “I… dropped a spoon,” Gabriel lied, reaching his hand up onto the counter to grab one in a poor attempt to save face. Castiel, of course, saw it, and rolled his eyes, “Just… talk to her. She’s nice.” “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” “You’re hopeless.” May the Froth Be With You New year, new outlook. This was his time, he could feel it. It was freshly January, resolution in place. Talk to her. Now, he made sure to not put too high of an expectation on himself. Even if talking was simply a hello that didn’t make him want to run to the restroom and vomit, he’d check the box. “You guys should’ve saved that one for May 4th! Wasted opportunity,” she joked, slapping a hand down on the counter, “Cas, my man, as much as I told myself this year was for venturing out of my comfort zone, I won’t be starting today.” “So the usual then?” Cas chuckled, taking her exact change from her. “The usual. But, you know what, give me a croissant too. Not quite an adventure, but something new.” Gabriel’s stomach dropped. Change, he didn’t like it. Plus, what if it wasn’t up to her standards? He hadn’t put the right amount of care into making them this morning, they wouldn’t be up to par. He’d been up late, concocting yet another failed attempt at gaining a positive comment about his coffee names. There was no way around this, she could see them in the glass case to the left. He watched as Cas put the buttery, little roll in the warmer, his brain scrambling over just how to react when she complained how utterly awful it was. She’d taken her seat up before her food was ready and like some kind of evil clockwork, someone walked in and began ordering coffee for their entire platoon right as the toaster dinged. Which left Gabriel to deliver his terrible baked concoction to her. Awesome. Was garnishing it with a few fresh strawberries too far? It was probably too far. In the same thought, she’d never ordered one before, so would she even know it was an extra embellishment? Probably, she was here for half an hour every day and half the patrons ordered a damn croissant. The girl seemed like someone who would notice only hers had strawberries on the plate. Then he’d have to answer to it… not worth it. Letting out a shaky breath, he grabbed the plate, a small cup of butter placed on the side, and took off for the corner. Her attention was very much still on her book, she’d since moved on to ‘Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban’… a stark difference to her previous novel. He hoped he’d be able to slide it in beside her, bid a brief and fond farewell and then slink back off to his corner until that bus drove away at 8:56, but the universe had other plans. As his footsteps grew closer, her gaze lifted, falling to him, her mouth ticking up into a little smile. Why’d she have to smile so softly? It was a thing of dreams. He’d know, he’d dreamed about it. It sparkled up into her eyes, no one looked at him like this ever… it was all in his head, it had to be. This was a friendly smile that nice people gave to other people who were doing them a service. She was polite, she was kind… she was now covered in butter and crumbs as his feet tripped up, sending him stumbling and the plate he was carrying straight into her lap. “Oh god!” he gasped, eyes growing wide in fear, “I’m so sorry, oh my god…” His cheeks were burning, he felt a sweat breaking out in his underarms as his stomach knotted so tight he thought for sure he’d never be able to eat again. Why would he want to? This was mortifying, he was going to go hole up in a closet and never come out. “It’s fine,” she laughed, “it’s what I get for straying.” “I’ll… I’m gonna make you another one. And refund this one. And… your coffee, and, you can have coffee all week, on me…” “It’s fine, really! See?” With a few brushes of her hands, she looked as good as new, minus the oil stain from the glob butter. She’d even put the pastry and cup right back onto the plate, as if she’d still be eating this one. “It fell in my lap, I’m not above eating things that fall on me. I wash my clothes fairly regularly.” There was that smile again, and the lower lip bite. So much for new year, new outlook. This was going to be the worst. French Press My Buttons “What? No!” Gabriel cried into the phone, “What do you mean stuck?! It’s Tuesday!” “Yes… and there’s two feet of snow covering the roads.” Castiel had called at 4 AM that morning, stuck. He’d taken two days (conveniently a Sunday and Monday. Maybe not so convenient, maybe forced) and was now snowed in. He wouldn’t be able to drive home until at least that afternoon. It was Tuesday. Tuesday, and now Gabriel was going to be at that counter, alone. “It’s Tuesday,” Gabriel pointed out again, his voice exasperated as he did nothing to even attempt to hide his anxiety. “Yes. I am aware. I’ll be home tonight and ready to work tomorrow, which is Wednesday.” Groaning, Gabriel hung up his phone, running his hand through his hair. Ten months, it’d been ten months and he’d avoided this. First, croissant in the lap, now this. He was going to end up in the hospital by February. It was 8:16 AM, and she was almost late. The bell on the door jingled, alerting him to her arrival. He didn’t need to look up, he knew who it was. His head hung down to his chest, what was the fastest way to get his over with? Run, maybe? Go start over in a new city, he didn’t have any ties here, it’d be fine… Maybe Monte Carlo, they always needed new… talent.

“Oh! No Cas today, huh?” she bubbled, and he could hear her smile. His mouth was dry, his chest was constricting and pounding all at the same time, “Good… good morning. What can I do for you- get for you today?” “Is this why you don’t work the counter?” She was giggling, he loved that laugh, he’d listen to it forever if he could. His eyes snapped shut in embarrassment, this was going to just as well as he’d planned, which was dismal. At least he hadn’t mentioned how perfectly her eyes glowed in the Edison lighting they had above the counter, he’d never experienced it before… “I’m just… better with the foam…” he improvised, he could hear his voice shaking, no chance she didn’t as well. “Uh huh. French Press My Buttons? Who comes up with these?” she teased, clicking her tongue. Another fail. “I uh… I do.” Why’d he admit that? He could have blamed… no one. He was literally the only one here, and it was common knowledge he and Cas owned this joint with no other help or corporations. He supposed he could have still blamed his brother, why didn’t he? Her eyes widened in regret, her bottom lip dragging between her teeth, but this one wasn’t like the other times. This one looked… nervous? “Oh,” she whispered, eyes falling away. “It’s okay, I know they’re lame…” he agreed, he didn’t like that look on her face. “No no, it’s cute…” An awkward silence settled between them. Great. So far this year he’d spilled butter and a croissant in her lap, and now upset her with his terrible attempt at puns and they were only two weeks in. He didn’t know what else to say. Consoling people was never his forte, and consoling someone that his brain couldn’t even function around was just an impossible task. “Tell you what, I’ll take your special,” she settled, looking back up with a little of her sparkle back. “You never get the-“ he began, cutting himself off. Now didn’t seem the time to divulge he was well aware of her ordering habits, and that he’d tweaked them to make her perfect cup of coffee. He’d already done enough damage. Silently, he rang her out, thanking his lucky stars she’d picked French Press day to order the special. He could still use the appropriate tweaks to make this one just as good as her usual. Of course, today with the change in order, her typical perfect change had turned to a twenty. Without peeling his eyes from the cash drawer, he handed her back sixteen dollars and seventy five cents. He was positive, he counted it three times. No way she didn’t think he was an idiot now. Stumbling over words, counting money multiple times, next time he looked at her he was half expecting her face to be covered in pity. French pressed, cream, two and half sugars. Half the battle was over, now it was just hand it over and wait until 8:56. He was so close. Cas would be back tomorrow and he’d return to his wallflower status. Forget that resolution, it was never going to happen. He was cursed to forever be stuck here, the awkward barista at the convenient coffee shop. He’d scare her away in another couple of months, no doubt. “Thanks, Gabriel,” she cooed, his name falling from her lips like poetry, her fingers gently grazing over his as she pulled the mug from his outstretched hand. His breath caught in his throat, audibly. It sounded like he was having an asthma attack, his throat closing in on itself as the mini shockwaves from her soft fingertips receded. “You okay?” she inquired, her voice hinted with concern. Not really, not at all, no. Damn you, Cas, and your stupid weekend trip. “Oh yeah,” he boasted, the confidence in his voice shocking him, his lips pursed out in forced bravery. When her lips parted along the clear, glass mug, he felt his body tense. Was she going to hate it? Probably. Her eyebrows lifted, and he couldn’t decipher if it was a good lift or a bad one. The corners of her mouth lifted as well and she tipped the mug back again. “This is good,” she complimented, “might have to try whatever you come up with tomorrow.” Tomorrow? Oh no, what he had planned for tomorrow wasn’t going to cut it. Not anymore. Suit and Chai Affair “You’re back!” she exclaimed as she spotted Cas back behind the counter. No doubt she was happy. No more terrible, awkward Gabriel to have to talk to just to get a coffee. “Relieving poor Gabriel of counter duty,” she continued, again making his insides flip-flop and cheek burns red as she spoke his name, “What’d you come up with for me today?” Was she talking to him? Cas stayed silent, a small smile tugging at his lips. He’d never tell his brother there certainly had not been two feet of snow on the roads yesterday, but that he was well aware of what— or should he say who— Tuesdays brought along. Gabriel turned, his guilt from yesterday still very prevalent. He couldn’t possibly keep her waiting on a response as he mustered the courage to speak; he just had to do it. “Uh… Suit and Chai Affair,” he began, “chai spices, in our… medium roast…” “Mhmm, I’ll take one,” she smirked, eyes squinting as her fingers fidgeted on the counter. Thankfully, he’d prepared for this. The spices were freshly set aside, coffee hot, and milk cold. Meticulously, he prepared it, probably taking too long, but better safe than sorry. She’d been ordering the same boring coffee for almost a year, so if she was venturing out he would be sure she enjoyed the journey. When he passed it over, he tried to suppress the hope that her fingers would brush against him again, but they didn’t. So now the challenge was keeping his face from falling in disappointment. “Did you trim your beard?” she asked, grinning, all teeth and sparkle. “I um… yes?” he choked. He truly didn’t think she was going to notice, he’d neatened it up in some weird, poor attempt to look better for her. “Looks good. I mean, it didn’t look bad before either.” “Your hair looks nice today.” The words fell from his mouth like rocks down a mountain, awkward and too fast to stop. Mentally, he slapped himself, what an idiotic thing to say. Even though it was true. He expected her face to twist into disgust, but instead, a skeptical snicker. That was better than a slap in the face… “Thank you. I haven’t washed it in three days and honestly I don’t even think I brushed it this morning, so I don’t know what you’re seeing, but I’ll take it.” There was no way he’d survive looking up at her now, so he kept his eyes on the counter. If he looked directly at that goofy little grin he could see through his lashes, he might combust, and when her bottom lip dragged through her teeth, it took all of his willpower to stay on his feet. There was no way he’d pulled that reaction from her. Not a chance. Green Tea and Ham It was Sunday. While he normally enjoyed his day of freedom from crippling infatuation, today he was missing the butterflies more than normal. All the Sunday regulars were in house, most stopping by after church, and while Gabriel tried to keep his lighthearted nature intact, it was difficult. “Bobby, you sly dog! Didn’t you just come from church?” he jested, watching as one of his favorite customers poured a little whiskey from a flask into his mug. “You know me, Gabe! The Lord wouldn’ta made whiskey if he didn’t want me to drink it on his day!” the old man yelled back, his boisterous laugh filling the small space. “Wow… never seen you so happy,” a familiar voice rang out from behind him and he froze, “didn’t think you had it in ya.” It was Sunday. She never came in on Sundays. The butterflies directed themselves right into hurricane formation and began swirling in his stomach. She was right. She’d never seen him this happy because he always seemed like he hated his life whenever she was around. “Have I… done something to you?” she questioned and his heart dropped, the sadness in her voice was apparent, even if she was trying to mask it, “Because if I have, I promise it was completely inadvertent…” “No!” he exclaimed, turning to face her, “no… you’ve never done anything.” How could she think that? That was preposterous. It was his own fault, and now she was blaming herself. This mess was only growing. “Okay, sorry then,” she sighed, turning back to the doors to leave. It was now or never. If she walked out that door he was certain she’d never come back, and that would be on him. He didn’t know where he found it, but courage surged through him for the first time in his life. “Wait!” he yelled after her, “Wait! Y/N!” His feet stumbled as he ran around the counter, hoping to catch her before she made it out the door. When she heard him calling for her she stopped, keeping her hand on the knob. Why was she here? She looked completely different, her hair curled and down, her clothes nicer than the usual ones she wore. This must be weekend her. “Look, I’m sorry,” he spluttered, “you just… you make me really nervous.” Well that was easier than he’d expected it to be. Granted it was only the beginning, but, at least it was a start. He rocked from heel to toe, waiting for her response. “Nervous?” she chortled, her laugh breathing through her nose, “Why’s that?” “You’re gorgeous.” If he’d ever once wished to have the ability to grab words and shove them back down his throat, it was nothing compared to what he was feeling right now. His eyes widened in horror as she turned to face him. “I’m sorry… that’s not appropriate,” he apologized, shaking his head. “No… it’s … it’s fine,” she stumbled, her own eyes nervously darting around the room “I mean, between you and me, you’re kinda nice to look at too.” His breath came out in a shaking whoosh. Was this real life? This couldn’t be real, he was still asleep. That was the only way any of this made sense. It was why she was even here on a Sunday. “You don’t have to… flatter me,” he chided. No way she thought he was in any way, shape or form attractive. “Why do you think I keep coming here? I mean, your coffee is great, but, it’s a little out of my way…” she trailed off. “But you catch the bus…” “Yeah… it’s three stops away from the closest one to me… that’s why I never get off here.” Now that she’d mentioned it, he never did see her get off the bus here, and damn if he didn’t try. He’d always just thought he missed her, or that she didn’t make it back before they closed. It was his turn to smile, turning his head up to look at her. Her lips were pursed in a nervous little pout. He’d never seen anything so endearing, her hands were in her jacket pockets, and she was rocking from heel to toe, just as he had been moments before. “Is it… cliché for me to ask you to have coffee sometime?” she proposed, looking at him hopefully. “I like cliché,” he shrugged. “Okay… well, I’m… I’m free tomorrow. If that’s not too eager.” “As long as you’re okay with… nervous rambling…” “Thanks for the warning. 8:14? I’ll take my usual, medium roast with cold cream and two and a half sugars.” He smiled. So she did know. “I’ll have it ready.”

A/N I do have a part two thought out, let me know if you liked this one and I’ll write it up soon! Beta requested a board of all the coffee names, so here it is XD.

[wanderingcas]

This week: Destiel in Canon!

[Thank you, everyone, for your wonderful submissions to Week 2 of Spn Fanfic Submission Thursday!! If you want to participate in next week’s fic submissions, check out the schedule!]

Totally Platonic Bunkmates by @braezenkitty

Five times Dean and Cas had to bunk together, and one time they didn’t.

“He could be an adult about this, it really wasn’t a big deal. He’d just keep to his side of the bed and face the wall, away from Cas. It wasn’t a problem at all. So why did his stomach feel like he just ate a handful of worms?”

Teen and Up. 5.5k words. (Complete)

[Sharing a Bed, Sexually Frustrated Dean, Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss]

Silver Lining by @darkheartinthesky 

After Castiel is severely injured during a hunt, Dean and Sam have a talk. Dean realizes what it is he really wants.

Teen. 6.5k words. (Complete)

Tags: Hurt Castiel, Caretaker Dean, Sharing a Bed, Supportive Sam

I Can’t Go On Without You by @destielonfire

Something is killing couples who participated in a secret Valentine’s Day ritual, leaving Dean and Castiel with no choice but to go undercover as a couple to investigate the murders. But when the ritual uncovers some long-buried truths, will this mean the start of something new between them?

Teen. 7.7k words. (Complete)

[Fluff & Angst, Sharing a Bed, First Kiss, BAMF Cas, Fake Relationship]

Wake Up by @destielmixtape

Dean is having a mental breakdown, and Castiel is the only one who might be able to help. Can Dean let down his guard enough to let Castiel in? Can he reconcile his feelings for Cas despite his own crushing insecurity? And can Castiel fight Dean’s inner demons without losing himself in the process? Will someone, anyone, please just use their friggin’ words?

Explicit. 58.5k words. (Complete)

[Fluff & Angst, Wing Kink, Grace Sex, BAMF Cas, Angst, Smut]

A Letter to Mom, from Dean by @hetaliankilljoy

Dear mom,

It’s me, Dean. Where are you? You’re an angel now, right? I don’t care about freckles, I just want you to kiss me once more please. I’m scared, can you sing me this song, that puts me to sleep, and helps me feel better when I’m sick? I miss you, mommy!

Teen and up. 3k words. (Complete)

[Songfic, Season 1-5 spoilers, love confessions, hurt/comfort, angst]

Heartbeat by @cardinaleyes

Castielsentries is a current canon blog that posts a new entry per day and has AU days, which is what this day was. This was written at the end of season 11 when Cas did not know if Dean survived Amara’s power. Soulmates can feel each other’s heartbeats.

Teen and Up. 1.2k words. (Complete)

[Canon Compliant, Season 11 finale coda, Cas POV]

This is Real by @compulsive-baker

Castiel and Sam return to the bunker after Dean confronts Amara. Castiel keeps his promise to watch out for Sammy after Dean is gone, but he can’t take care of himself as he falls into depression. His mental health is slipping, but Dean comes back to fix his angel.

Mature. 3.3k words. (Complete)

[Canon divergent season 11 finale, Smut, Tender Love and Care]

A Photo Booth and Funnel Cake by @deanisthebeesknees

Dean and Castiel end up at a county fair during a case. Dean shows Castiel the awesomeness of photo booths and fluff ensues.

Teen and Up. 1.9k words. (Complete)

[Fluff, county fair, photo booth, funnel cake, Shipper!Sam]

untitled by @woefulcas

Cas comes back human after the events of 12.23; Dean and Cas cuddle in bed. 

General Audience. .5k words. (Complete)

[Season 12 Coda, Warning for Extreme Fluff™]

Ignorance is Bliss (Usually) by @60r3d0m

Dean and Cas have a very public deathbed confession and officially become an item. And this would totally be thrilling—except Sam gets knocked out during the fight and misses the whole damn thing.

Or, the one where everybody except Sam knows and Sam thinks Dean’s sudden newfound celibacy is a witch’s curse.

Mature. 8.2k words. (Complete)

[oblivious!Sam, jealousy, Established Relationship, Miscommunication]

Ultraviolet by @mittensmorgul

The world seemed to be settling back into a somewhat regular pattern of supernatural activity after Sam officially rescinded the British Men of Letters American visa and Cas had moved into the bunker as a full-time Winchester. What seemed like a milk run hunt goes pear-shaped when Dean becomes the latest victim of a soul-devouring curse. Breaking the curse and saving his life only lead to a bigger mystery when someone unexpected steps out of the Impala and walks right into the middle of their case.

Mature. 8k/45k words. (WIP; posting a chapter a day)

[Case fic, Human Impala, Hurt/Comfort, Sharing a Bed, First Time]

Holy, Holy, Holy by @deanirae​

There was a hell-hound gnawing at the bones of Dean’s legs, each bite a payment for Sam’s breaths. To the very end, Dean thought it was a good price. He was willing to pay. But the angel who listened had learned about the great plot of using a brave, righteous man to start a petty Apocalypse and sacrificed everything to ensure it would never begin. It was 2008 and it’s probably still Wednesday now and Cas is keeping Dean safe, away from Heaven, from Hell, from everything. Despite Castiel’s best efforts, everything remains pretty determined to either get its hands on Dean or just get him back where he allegedly belongs. But there’s at least four theories about where that is and Dean seems to be the only one who doesn’t have one. Most of the time he just feels something is amiss and he keeps wondering when it’s going to be Friday and if the purple dog is ever going to come back.

Explicit. 54k words. (Complete)

[Canon Divergent after 3.16, Angst, Unhealthy Relationships]

Warnings: Major Character Death, Uninformed Consent, Emotional Manipulation, PTSD

On The Inner Workings Of Non-Angels by @babybluecas​

The way it began couldn’t get more cliché: Dean kissing Cas in the rain as they turned their ‘goodbye’ into a bittersweet ‘see you soon.’ Three years later, Dean can hardly believe what his life has become: he’s a happy civilian, shacked up in the bunker with Cas. The whole messed up world seems to have left them alone, at last, and the worst things that ever happen to Dean are the rom-com marathons his better half tortures him with. Even Sam’s living his dream, back in law school.

A true happily ever after for all.

The problem is that those, in Dean’s experience, don’t last forever. So when Cas starts acting suspicious, with strange phone calls and daydreams and the walls of yellowed books rising around him, Dean has a full right to be worried. He’s no longer sure he could handle their perfect, little world falling apart.

But Cas, of course, says everything’s fine.

Mature. 39k words. (Complete)

[Fluff, Angst, Established relationship, Fallen!castiel, Post alt-season 9]

Forgotten Angel by @justrandomspnstuff​

Cas looked around his empty apartment remembering when he’d had a purpose, when he’d been someone. And he realized at that moment why he kept his angel blade–because it was getting harder and harder for him to convince himself that he hadn’t always been a nobody. Hadn’t always been a whore.

Explicit. 86.4k words. (WIP)

Prostitute!castiel, Slow burn, Angst, Bottom!cas

Warnings: Rape/non con, Self Harm, Drug Mention

Fives Times Dean Called Cas Sweetheart (As a Joke and the One Time He Meant It) by @profound-boning​

Delicious breakfasts, beer with dinner, countless movie marathons after Dean and Sam hooked up a television and VHS/DVD player in one of the sitting rooms, hot showers, the smell of clean laundry… Yes, Castiel definitely enjoyed a lot of little things about his new life with the Winchesters.

The chance to get closer to Dean certainly didn’t hurt.

General Audiences. 3.2k words. (Complete) [Men of Letters Bunker, Bunker Fluff, Human Cas, Miscommunication]

Then I Defy You Stars by @spearywritesstuff​

They won if you ignore what they lost. Lucifer was cast out and the Darkness departed, but they couldn’t save Cas. So Dean gave up. With the passage of time and Sam’s support, Dean makes a life for himself miles away from hunting and anything supernatural. He runs a planetarium and teaches classes on astronomy, because once, long ago, Cas told him that when the ancient heroes fell, mankind could still find them in the stars. Dean looks to the stars.

Explicit. 81.8k words. (Complete)

[Angst, Temporary Character Death, Canon Divergent after 11x18]

You Can’t Get Rid Of The Babadook (And Years Of Unresolved Sexual Tension) by @mijrake​

When the queer community accepts the Babadook as their new found icon, they accidentally create a Tulpa that starts killing homophobic people. Of course, Team Free Will rises to the occasion.

Explicit. 11.9k words. (Complete)

[Case Fic, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Bisexual Dean Winchester]

Arrow by @all-i-need-is-destiel​

In which Sam starts to act very weird all of a sudden, centering his entire attention on a certain blue-eyed angel, Dean doesn’t know what to make of this strange behavior and his own confusing feelings, Castiel just goes with the flow and Gabriel has got the time of his life.

Teen and Up. 7.1k words. (Complete)

[Friends to Lovers, Familial Love, First Kiss, Gabriel being a major douche]

helpless when the sky explodes by @envydean​

He’s been split up from his brother. Can’t even hear him, shout to him or anything. It’s like a part of him has been ripped from him and he sits in the corner of the cell, back to the wall and ass on the cold concrete floor. Food is shoved through a pass through but Dean doesn’t touch it, barely looks at it.

Mature. 5k words. (Complete)

[Suicidal thoughts, hurt/comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dark Fic]

Wardrobe Change by @phangirlpenguin​

Sam’s been jumpy around Cas ever since they defeated Amara. A wardrobe change may help, but how will it affect Dean?

General Audience. 1.6k words. (Complete)

[Fluff, Cuddling, Get-together, possible consent issues]

Hot Like Ice by @relucant​

“I… I can’t feel my toes. Or my fingertips. Is that bad?”

Dean swore under his breath. “Uh, it ain’t great, buddy. Can you move ‘em?”

Cas furrowed his brow in concentration. “I don’t know. It burns. Why does cold burn?”

“It just does, Cas.” He picked up Cas’ hand, and his fingers felt like ice. He peered at Cas’ face, and caught a tinge of blue on his lips. “Shit. OK, Cas, we might be gettin’ into territory where you think about usin’ some grace. Not on me, I always run a little hot, but you’re lookin’ like you’re gettin’ hypothermia.”

“I don’t think I can,” Cas said slowly. “There’s so little left, and I’m so cold…”

“Shit.” Dean scrubbed his hand over his face, then came to a decision. “Take off your clothes.”

Explicit. 3.8k words. (Complete)

[Fluff, First Time, Bed Sharing, Bottom Dean, Top Castiel]

A Night on the Couch by @caslikescoffeeandfreckles​

Dean and Cas get in an argument and it leads to one of them sleeping on the couch for the night.

General Audience. 1.7k words. (Complete)

[Gratuitous Fluff]

Cinnamon and Sugar by @liraelclayr007

Dean has feelings for Cas, but he is afraid to show them.

Cas has feelings for Dean, but can’t find the right words. So he decides to say it with pie.

Teen and Up. 1.3k words. (Complete)

[alternating pov, Cas bakes a pie, Cas loves Dean, Dean loves Cas]

Worthy by jad

“… you wanna what, now?” Dean asks, because he definitely didn’t hear that right.

Castiel tilts his head, a leftover tick from his angel days that Dean would be lying if he claimed to find anything but idiotically endearing. He knows this is his own fault, owing to that rather memorable moment a week ago when Cas wandered into this very same kitchen with a (fairly) legitimate question and Dean just didn’t know when to shut up.

Explicit. 15k words. (Complete)

[s9 bunker fluff, human Castiel, porn with feelings]

Blame It On Me by @coffeeandcas

Castiel has left the bunker and is trying to build a life for himself, alone, and is failing. He moves from one homeless camp to the next, struggling to find his place in the world and feeling more unwanted as every day passes. He never meets April, and with no form of identification to prove who he is, he never gets offered a job at the Gas n Sip.

Eventually, he falls in with the wrong crowd and his life takes a sudden, violent downward spiral. After months of searching, Dean and Sam manage to find him and bring him home, but at what cost?

Explicit. 44k words. (Complete)

[Human Castiel, Men of Letters Bunker, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Prostitution]

Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Drug-Induced Sex, Rape/Non-con

[ruthlessbookfish]

Hookup Café Series by Fifi Flowers

release blitz

May 15

My Reviews

Monday: Tall, Dark, & Aromatic

Pansie had an awesome internal dialog going for everything Basil did. Basil expressed himself to Pansie in such an adorable and delicious way. They meshed really well together. I loved how thoughtful Basil was. 

Tuesday: Double Shot

This one was a little of a tearjerker for me. Marzi goes through the wringer with family issues. I liked how her and Avery’s relationship had such a connection to her parents one.

Wednesday: With Lots of Cream

Evie and Nate were sweet and intense. They kept a few things from each other, leading to an interesting make up session. I loved Evie’s parents.

Thursday: Bold, Rich & Strong

I could not wait to read Saylor and Deacon’s story. I think I looked forward to this one the most. They were both so brash and in your face with each other. I loved the sweet side they finally showed.

Friday: Laced with Spice

Mason was kind of a jerk, and I loved how he would get jealous over Vivienne. Vivienne deals with it like a pro and I loved when Morgan got involved.

Saturday: Light, Full Bodied & Screwed

Vin and Darla complimented each other so well, right on down to business. I loved that Darla was the pursuer. Vin was sweet and he made sure he was deserving of Darla. I loved the lead in to Vixen’s story too. I can’t wait for that. *I voluntarily read an advanced reader’s copy of this book*

Title: Hookup Café Series

Author: Fifi Flowers

Genre: Steamy Contemporary Romance Release Date: April/May 2017

Series Blurb

Welcome to the Hookup Café Series featuring a quaint café called Cafélicious, located in the downtown area of San Diego, owned by Pansie. Sitting at a table in the café, you will meet her friends, employees, customers, and her poetry man Basil. You will, also, get to read about romances with Marzi’s delivery man Avery; Evie’s musical man Nate; Saylor’s beastly man Deacon; Vivienne’s blind date Mason… and from a male POV, Vin will tell us how he is tormented by Darla. Come along and enjoy the laughs, tears, friendships, and romance that this series has to offer!

ADD TO GOODREADS

Purchase Links

MONDAY is FREE for a VERY limited time!

All other books are 99c 

AMAZON US / UK / CA / AU

Free in Kindle Unlimited

#1 MONDAY

When a sinfully gorgeous man enters Cafélicious, the owner, Pansie, is consumed with his beauty and although she thinks he might be homeless, he has captured her heart without even knowing it. Basil, the man in question, is instantly smitten by Pansie and makes it his mission in life to woo her with his poetry and charm. Could it be that he is the man for her at the so-called Hookup Café?

#2 TUESDAY

When a hunky delivery man steps through baker Marzi’s kitchen doors of Cafélicious early one morning, she gets from more than the supplies needed to create her amazing sweet treats. Avery gives a hold new meaning to the words excellent customer service and he’s willing to deliver far more than his goods. Marzi busy with her business and personal issues, limits Avery to one day a week. Will he continue to accept her limitations or will he breakthrough and get her to give him dessert anytime, anywhere?

#3 WEDNESDAY

When Evie welcomes everyone to Cafélicious’ Open-Mic night, she finds herself doing something totally out of her comfort zone thanks to a heart-stopping, beautiful man sitting close to the stage sporting sexy arm tats. Nate stares up at the vision before him with his clear blue eyes and finds himself lost to her as he watches the shy café server belt out a sensuous song. Their love of music draws them closer together. It was supposed to be a summer fling, but will it turn into something more?

#4 THURSDAY

When one very muscular man walks up to the counter of Cafélicious, head barista Saylor is abruptly asked if she was named after a one-night stand her mother had with a stranger. Not one easily intimidated, she puts Deacon in his place which only seems to make him come on stronger and when he tells her that she likes him because he is bold, rich, and strong, she isn’t sure if that’s true or if she wants to slap him. Could it be that he is right?

#5 FRIDAY

When Vivienne joins an online blind-dating service and sets a date, she has him meet her at Cafélicious owned by her best friend where they can check him out to make sure he is not a dud or worse. Unbeknownst to mystery man Mason, her friends are texting her a message that reads laced with spice meaning that he is handsome and that she should show up. What will happen when he finds out that she has cheated the system?

#6 SATURDAY

When a stunning woman sits down at a counter where chef Vin is attempting to create gourmet dishes, he decides that she should be banned from sitting so close to him. It turns out that she will not be leaving his sight as Darla is the new wine rep in charge of pairing his cuisine with her wines. Listening to her wine presentations that put him on the edge, he categorizes her as light, full-bodied and himself as screwed. Can these two pair up outside of Cafélicious?

Author Bio

Fifi Flowers, an internationally known artist turn author from the Los Angeles area of California, writes romance novels and paints fantasies with a Parisian flair while daydreaming of her time spent sipping cafe crème in the cafes of Paris.

She penned her love of Paris and romance to the pages of her first novel, A Window To Love, published in 2013, when she sat down, and instead of putting paint to paper, put her pen to paper and began her first novel. Since that first novel, Fifi has self-published several steamy contemporary romances and has many more in the works.

Author Links

TWITTER / FACEBOOK PAGE 

FACEBOOK PROFILE / FACEBOOK GROUP 

GOODREADS / WEBSITE / PINTEREST 

INSTAGRAM / GOOGLE+ / BOOKBUB 

AMAZON / NEWSLETTER

[weekendwritingmarathon]

This weekly roundup includes fics written (at least in part) during the 1k1h sprints and/or the Weekend Writing Marathon events.

Fics are ordered first by fandom, then by word count from smallest to largest.

*

You’re My Best Friend by @pherryt​

Marvel || Winterhawk (Clint/Bucky) || General || No major warnings apply || 8,474 words || Complete

Summary: Clint and Bucky need to go on a road trip to get to their next mission which Clint figures is the best way to get to know Bucky even better. It goes better than planned!

Other tags: Fluff, Angst, lots of fluff, Road Trip, Sight seeing, bed sharing, Heart to Hearts, a little bit of subterfuge going on, First Kiss, Party, ice cream shop, Selfies, pop culture references, Pining, Mutual Pining

*

Into the Split: Evolution 4 by @tryslora​

Original Fiction (Welcome to PHU) || Nikolai/Seth (M/M) || Teen & up || Author chooses not to give major warnings || 4,309 / 100,344 words || WIP

Summary: Nikolai dives back into the Dreamscape as they work to build the Dreamwalker network.

Other tags: Magic, Dreams

*

Where There’s Smoke by klove0511

Supernatural || Gen || General || No major warnings apply || 535 words || Complete

Summary: Dean has been missing for 2 weeks, and Sam is trying to bake a pie.

Other tags: Sam, Castiel, pie

*

The Milk is Never Free by treefrogie84

Supernatural || Rowena MacLeod/Sam Winchester || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 1,385 words || Complete

Summary: Your gran tells stories about witches-- wild women, powerful enough to cause the crops to fail, to catch a babe or lose it, power of life and death and so much besides. She tells them as warnings, but what they are is temptations. Power is what you want, and if you have to kiss the arse of Lucifer himself to get it, well, there are worse things whispered about in the kitchens and barns of the village. Still, you kiss any boy willing to teach you to read a bit, to better understand the power in the Devil’s book.

Other tags: 2nd person POV, Sex as a Commodity, Aromantic!Rowena,

*

Roses Are Red and it’s Really Annoying by @thayerkerbasy​

Supernatural || Meg/OFC || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 2,912 words || Complete

Summary: It's Valentine's Day at the Sleepy Hollow Motel, which really isn't Meg's thing, but it's Tirzah's first Valentine's Day. Part 5 of the Something In Between series.

Other tags: Afterlife, Valentine's Day, Aromantic Meg, Minor Crowley/Balthazar

*

Every Monster that Sleeps Inside You (chapter 26-46) by treefrogie84

Supernatural || destiel, drowley, dean x cas x crowley || Mature || Graphic descriptions of violence || 244,759 words || Complete

Summary: Attempting the trials to close Hell lets loose something far worse than the occasional crossroads demon or Dean’s second favorite drinking buddy. Heaven wants all the tablets they can get their hands on, Abaddon wants to destroy everything in favor of utter chaos in Hell as well as on Earth, and somehow, Sam and Dean have to stop all of it. Except stopping Abaddon might take more from Dean than he can afford to give. A Mark of Cain fix-it starting at 8.12 As Time Goes By.

Other tags: canon-typical violence, canon divergent, mark of cain, demon!Dean, season 9 fix-it, season 10 fix-it, Carver era rewrite

*

Have you posted a fic recently?  Any active WWM participant can Submit your fic here by midnight EST Wednesday and it will be included on next Friday’s WWM Fic Roundup post.

[weekendwritingmarathon]

This weekly roundup includes fics written (at least in part) during the 1k1h sprints and/or the Weekend Writing Marathon events.

Fics are ordered first by fandom, then by word count from smallest to largest.

***

The Possibilities Are Endless by @ialwayscomewhenyoucall

Doctor Who || ten x rose || Mature || No major warnings apply || 346 words || Complete

Summary: He sits against the headboard, Rose curled into his side, his fingers absently running through her hair. “Where should we go tomorrow?” he murmurs. “You choose,” she says. He doesn’t have to see her face to know she’s smiling. ** In which the Doctor rambles and Rose has the answer.

Other tags: fluff, established relationship

***

Just Close Your Pretty Eyes by @ialwayscomewhenyoucall

Good Omens || Crowley/Aziraphale || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 819 words || Complete

Summary: You go too fast for me, Crowley. Just seven words. When taken separately none of them, besides his name, holds any particular meaning for him. But together they cause something inside him--something he’s tried to keep hidden, even from himself--to break. And when he adds the look in Aziraphale’s eyes… It’s too much to think about. So he doesn’t. (part 1 of 3)

Other tags: angst, pining, 1970s--sometime after the holy water incident, POV crowley

***

The Nights Grow Long by @ialwayscomewhenyoucall

Good Omens || Crowley/Aziraphale || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 940 words || Complete

Summary: Aziraphale has walked completely around the block--walking in circles even as his thoughts wind in circles--and is standing in front of his shop again. He doesn’t feel rested or refreshed, just discombobulated. And a little bit sad. Time for a spot of cocoa, then. And somewhere in the bookshop there must be something that can distract him for a few hours. (part 2 of 3)

Other tags: angst, pining, 1970s--sometime after the holy water incident, POV aziraphale

***

Let Our Candle Always Burn by @ialwayscomewhenyoucall

Good Omens || Crowley/Aziraphale || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 1,730 words || Complete

Summary: The butterflies in his stomach seem to have invited friends. “Yes. Lovely,” Aziraphale says again. Convincing himself. Because Crowley is right: they are their own side now. And maybe, just maybe, being with Crowley isn’t actually giving in to temptation. Maybe being with Crowley is… Going home. (part 3 of 3)

Other tags: angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort, mutual pining, first kiss, POV aziraphale

***

Bucky Barnes Hates the Heat by @pherryt

marvel || winterhawk || General || No major warnings apply || 1,924 words || Complete

Summary: Bucky Barnes hated the heat. Most of the Avengers had apparently decided that the Winter Soldier and Captain America both would have embraced the heat, due to their years long of being frozen. They were wrong.

Other tags: heat, Pool, First Kiss, mild panic attack, somebody's ticklish, Little bit of angst, lots of fluff, side Stony

***

Forgetting by @ialwayscomewhenyoucall

Supernatural || Dean/Cas || Mature || No major warnings apply || 930 words || Complete

Summary: The pillows scratch at the bare skin of his back, but they hold his body as if they know him. And they do; he rarely sleeps in his bed. He reserves his bed for other things. But that’s another thing it’s easier to forget, so he pushes it out of his mind. He’s gotten fairly good at forgetting. There’s a twinge in his back, near his shoulder blades, and he flexes his wings. Only he doesn’t have wings anymore, so the ache remains. Phantom pain in phantom limbs. He can almost hear the whisper of feathers.

Other tags: angst, wings, implied/referenced drug use

***

Sparks of Summer by klove0511

Supernatural || Gen || General || No major warnings apply || 1,005 words || Complete

Summary: Rowena still keeps the old ways, superstitious as that may sound. She knows better than most what lurks in the dark. This year, she won’t be the only one who benefits.

Other tags: Rowena MacLeod, Beltane, Magic, mood piece

***

An Appropriate Response by klove0511

Supernatural || Sam/Dean || Teen & up || Rape/Non-con || 5,330 words || Complete

Summary: While Dean was in Purgatory, Sam disappeared. When Dean finally finds his brother, will there be anything left to save?

Other tags: Sibling Incest, Self-Harm, Hurt Sam Winchester, Established Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester, Established Relationship, Sam Winchester Has Mental Health Issues, Implied/Referenced Torture, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Panic Attacks, Post-Season/Series 07 AU

***

At Any Cost by klove0511

Supernatural || eventual Cas/Sam/Dean, initial Dean/Lisa || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 18,109 words || Complete

Summary: When Sam came back from Hell, he felt different. He couldn't put his finger on what had changed, but the buzzing under his skin was definitely new. It didn't matter, though. Whatever it was, Dean would help him figure it out. The only problem was that Dean is happily retired in Indiana with Lisa. He deserved that happiness; Sam should just let him have that, right?

Other tags: Hurt/Comfort, Angel Sam Winchester, Hurt Sam Winchester, Hurt Dean Winchester, Implied/Referenced Torture, Self-Esteem Issues, Suicidal Thoughts, Double Penetration, Face-Fucking, Voyeurism, Sibling Incest, Slow Burn, Spitroasting, Hell Trauma, Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester Cuddling, Alternate Season/Series 06

***

Have you posted a fic recently?  Any active WWM participant can Submit your fic here by midnight EST Wednesday and it will be included on next Friday’s WWM Fic Roundup post.

[weekendwritingmarathon]

This weekly roundup includes fics written (at least in part) during the 1k1h sprints and/or the Weekend Writing Marathon events.

Fics are ordered first by fandom, then by word count from smallest to largest.

***

Tattooed Memories by @pherryt

Marvel || winterhawk (clint/bucky), brief Phil Coulson/Clint Barton || Explicit || Major Character Death || 14,312 words || Complete

Summary: Sometimes, Clint doesn't know what even is his life anymore. He ran from the circus to get away from the less than savory things they were doing, but here he was, basically a (less than legal) hero for hire and... getting pointers from the Winter Soldier?

Other tags: pre avengers, post winter soldier, Clint's past, Vigilante!Clint, Mindwipes, Forced Amnesia, hurt!Clint, Hurt/Comfort, Crying, Secret Relationship, Canon Compliant, deaf!Clint, Teacher!Bucky, Memory Loss, Tattoos, Angst, Passing Time, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Clint POV, (MCD is canon, not Clint or Bucky)

***

Our Tattered Edges (are coming together) by @pherryt

Marvel || established Clint/Laura, main Winterhawk, eventual Clint/Laura/Bucky, mention of past relationships: Steve/Bucky, Clint/Laura/Nat || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 59,435 words || Complete

Summary: Someone’s targeting and brainwashing kids and if that wasn’t bad enough, they could confirm that at least some of the children taken had superpowers. Bucky even knew one of them. And that’s how Bucky finds himself at the Barton Homestead with Sam, hoping to convince Clint to come back to the Avengers. After seeing Clint with his family, Bucky is certain it won’t work - it’s clear to him that Clint still has some issues over the whole Thanos thing, so when he agrees, Bucky is surprised. And maybe a little worried. Now they’re working together to find the kids but Clint is quiet, distant and angry – nothing like the man Bucky had once met. The longer Bucky spends in Clint’s company, the more certain he is this isn’t going to end well.

Other tags: No cheating, Polyamory, Broken, Brainwashing, Kidnapping, post Endgame, deaf!Clint, Kid Fic, Canon deaths, Nightmares, Hurt/Comfort, Angry Sex, Mission Fic, Mention of Past Abuse, the snap, Second Chances, Fluff, Angst, some violence but nothing graphic, mention of suicidal thoughts, PTSD, bed sharing

***

Package Delivery by Hermit9

MCU, Spiderman Into the Spiderverse || Steve Rogers / Gwen Stacy || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 6,805 words || Complete

Summary: Signed, Sealed, Delivered, He's yours... (The one where Gwen asked for Captain America on a silver plater as a joke. She didn't expect Natasha to deliver.)

Other tags: Fluff and Smut, Spreader Bars, Chains, Oral Sex, wall Sex, Natasha has a plan, Birthday Smut, Bad BDSM Etiquette, Not Canon Compliant

***

Into the Split: Arrival 6 by @tryslora

Original Fiction (Welcome to PHU) || Nikolai/Seth (M/M) || Teen & up || Author chooses not to give major warnings || 2,062 / 15,908 words || WIP

Summary: Nikolai is finally on the road to Havenhill again, with his new companions, and there is a big surprise on the way.

Other tags: Multiple Universes, Serial, Magic, Shapeshifters

***

Into the Split: Arrival 6 by @tryslora

As above || 774 / 16,682 words || WIP

Summary: An excerpt from the journal of Alia, during the creation of Havenhill.

Other tags: Multiple Universes, Serial, Magic, Shapeshifters

***

Over Hill and Under Dale by Treefrogie84

Supernatural, Wayward Sisters || background Claire/Kaia || General || No major warnings apply || 932 words || Complete

Summary: Tell me a story, auntie? What story should I tell you? Yours. That is a very sad story.

Other tags: future fic, truth as a fairy tale

***

Birds and Bees by @thayerkerbasy

Supernatural || Balthazar/Crowley || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 3,830 words || Complete

Summary: There was "taking things slow" and then there was whatever Crowley and Balthazar had. Nothing changed until Crowley figured out one of the secrets of their afterlife.  Part 4 in the series Something In Between.

Other tags: Post-Episode: s12e23 All Along the Watchtower, Afterlife, Canon Compliant, Bees

***

Every Monster That Sleeps Inside You by Treefrogie84

Supernatural || destiel, drowley, dean x cas x crowley || Mature || Graphic Descriptions of Violence || 7,851 words || WIP

Summary: Attempting the trials to close Hell lets loose something far worse than the occasional crossroads demon or Dean’s second favorite drinking buddy. Heaven wants all the tablets they can get their hands on, Abaddon wants to destroy everything in favor of utter chaos in Hell as well as on Earth, and somehow, Sam and Dean have to stop all of it. Except stopping Abaddon might take more from Dean than he can afford to give. A Mark of Cain fix-it starting at 8.12 As Time Goes By.

Other tags: canon-typical violence, canon divergent, mark of cain, demon!Dean, season 9 fix-it, season 10 fix-it, Carver era rewrite

***

Have you posted a fic recently?  Any active WWM participant can Submit your fic here by midnight EST Wednesday and it will be included on next Friday’s WWM Fic Roundup post.

[weekendwritingmarathon]

This weekly roundup includes fics written (at least in part) during the 1k1h sprints and/or the Weekend Writing Marathon events.

Fics are ordered first by fandom, then by word count from smallest to largest.

***

every sunday's getting more bleak by gunsnships

Good Omens || Aziraphale/Crowley || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 4,173 words || Complete

Summary: Crowley indulges Hastur's request to focus on one human— he finds a quite interesting priest to tempt, so he takes matters into his own hands.

Other tags: Alternate Universe, Human Aziraphale (Good Omens), Demon Crowley (Good Omens), Priests, Internalized Homophobia, Catholic Guilt, Temptation, Gardens & Gardening, Dining at the Ritz (Good Omens), Alcohol, First Kiss, Tenderness, POV Alternating, Hopeful Ending

***

The Corruption of a National Icon by @pherryt

marvel || Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers/Sam Wilson, Clint Barton/Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov, steve rogers/natasha romanov/clint barton/bucky barnes/sam wilson/tony stark || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 1,790 words || Complete

Summary: Tony finally sleeps with Steve only to find he's not the innocent poster child Tony always thought him to be - now he wants to find out who was responsible for that!

Other tags: Slutty steve, Crack Fic, lots of banter, A little bit of angst, little bit of jealousy, then one big coming together

***

Foul Diplomacy by @ramblingandpie

Mass Effect: Andromeda || None || General || No major warnings apply || 1,348 words || Complete

Summary: The crew of the Tempest is tasked with transporting some very important cargo. Chicken cargo.

Other tags: Fluff, Literal Fluff, A bunch of baby chickens

***

Just Friends by @pherryt

Star Trek || McKirk || Mature || No major warnings apply || 1,457 words || Complete

Summary: Jim and Leonard are just friends, so why is everyone around them insisting they're something more?

Other tags: non explicit smut, but definitely smut, Denial, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn(sort of - if you take the elapsed time over fic length), Bottom!Jim, Top!Leonard, , Everybody knows

***

Thin Walls and Shower Stalls by @pherryt

Supernatural || destiel || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 3,644 words || Complete

Summary: Dean's been pining over his best friend and roommate, even since before he gave Cas a place to stay, and it's driving him nuts. He's pent up and needs release, and he can't exactly take care of himself with Cas in the apartment. Dean knows how thin the walls are, but apparently Cas doesn't know that. Luckily for both of them.

Other tags: shower smut, smut and feels, bottom!cas, top!dean

***

distractions by @froggydarren

Teen Wolf || Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski || General || No major warnings apply || 2,748 words || Complete

Summary: There are hunters in town. Young, ill-advised, easy targets for the pack. Still, Stiles knows that walking right into the motel they’re staying at is a recipe for disaster. Since it’s precisely what Derek seems to want to do, Stiles needs a distraction.

Other tags: Future Fic, Canon Compliant, Getting Together, First Date, Flirting

***

Have you posted a fic recently?  Any active WWM participant can Submit your fic here by midnight EST Wednesday and it will be included on next Friday’s WWM Fic Roundup post.

[weekendwritingmarathon]

This weekly roundup includes fics written (at least in part) during the 1k1h sprints and/or the Weekend Writing Marathon events.

Fics are ordered first by fandom, then by word count from smallest to largest.

***

The Quiet After by @threshie

Detroit: Become Human || none || Mature || Major Character Death || 1,928 words || Complete

Summary: Connor gets himself shot in the back protecting Hank at the Stratford Tower and dies instantly. Hank stays with his body until someone comes to collect it, but what he thinks of as his fallen partner is just more spare parts to CyberLife.

Other tags: Temporary Character Death, Dead Connor, Hank Anderson & Connor Friendship, Angst With a Happy Ending, Self-sacrifice, Hugs, References to Suicidal Thoughts, Implied/Referenced Alcholism, Artificial Intelligence, Androids, Hank Anderson Swears, The Stratford Tower Chapter

***

Thermal Cycle by Hermit9

MCU || Stucky || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 4,499 words || Complete

Summary: Steve was looking forward to this whole getaway a whole lot more than Bucky was. Silent retreats and quiet comforts weren't Bucky's idea of a fun day off. But he was open to changing his mind.

Other tags: D/s undertones, reference to past dub-con/non-con, sense memory, temperature play, praise kink, controlled exhibitionism, oral sex, cuddling, Infinity Wars non-compliant, Bucky has issues, Steve wants to make them better, this fic contains mentions of goats

***

Feather Pillows by @threshie

Supernatural || none || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 1,391 words || Complete

Summary: After a night time case gone wrong nearly kills Sam, he and Dean and Castiel retreat to a motel to sleep through the day. Everybody's a little shaken up still, though. Sequel to my fanfic Barbed Wire.

Other tags: Platonic Cuddling, Cuddle Pile, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Sam Winchester, Guilty Castiel, Comforting Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester Takes Care Of Sam Winchester, Holding Hands, Blood and Injury, Tired Sam Winchester, Fluff, Touchy-Feely

***

Burning Questions by @threshie

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester, Castiel/Sam Winchester, Castiel/Food || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 1,810 words || Complete

Summary: Right after Sam and Dean admit their unrequited feelings for Cas to each other, the ex-angel recruits them to answer a perfectly innocent, newly-human-problems type question: what’s a gag reflex?

Other tags: Sexual Humor, Castiel Has No Gag Reflex, Deepthroating, Licking, Food, Teasing, Unrequited Love, WinCasWin, Newly Human Castiel, Awkward Boners, Castiel Is Not Innocent, No Sex Actually Happens Here, Cas Gives Foods Blowjobs, Human Castiel In The Men Of Letters Bunker

***

Dean’s Favorite Holiday by @braezenkitty

Supernatural || Dean/Cas || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 2,080 words || Complete

Summary: A bit of self-indulgent fluff written for Valentine's day. Dean and Cas finally get their shit together.

Other tags: Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day Fluff, Fluff, First Kiss

***

Black Vultures by Treefrogie84

Supernatural/Wayward Sisters || Claire/Kaia || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 4,173 words || Complete

Summary: It's time. Claire has waited long enough, she's going to get Kaia back now, not matter what it takes.

Other tags: canon-typical violence, claire novak is a winchester, purgatory, leviathan

***

happy ending by @froggydarren

Teen Wolf || Derek/Stiles || General || No major warnings apply || 1,429 words || Complete

Summary: If you want a happy ending, it depends on where you stop the story. Through the years, Derek thought about the quote often. He wondered which ending would be right for him, where his story was going to stop.

Other tags: Future Fic, Getting Together, Derek POV

***

all trails lead back to you by Tryslora

Teen Wolf || Derek/Stiles || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 3.074 words || Complete

Summary: Derek has *wanted* for so long. He's a little scared when he finds out that Stiles *wants* in return. Maybe even something more than just want. Maybe something better.

Other tags: Future Fic, First Time, Bi Derek, Bi Stiles, Fluff & Smut

***

Have you posted a fic recently?  Any active WWM participant can Submit your fic here by midnight EST Wednesday and it will be included on next Friday’s WWM Fic Roundup post.

[weekendwritingmarathon]

This weekly roundup includes fics written (at least in part) during the 1k1h sprints and/or the Weekend Writing Marathon events.

Fics are ordered first by fandom, then by word count from smallest to largest.

***

Missed Fortunes: Final Outcome 1 by Tryslora

Original (Welcome to PHU) || Carolyn/Serina (F/F) || Teen & up || Author chooses not to give major warnings || 2,454 / 135,984 words || WIP

Summary: Jump first, apologize later... the time has come for Carolyn and her friends to actually tell Pawel what they've been up to, and figure out what comes next.

Other tags: Magic, tarot, College

Missed Fortunes: Final Outcome 2

As above || 2,291 / 138,275 words || WIP

Summary: Carolyn needs to talk to Serina. They have some things to work through, because the relationship is worth it.

Other tags: Magic, Tarot, College, Demisexual POV, Relationship Negotiation

***

home is where the dinner heart is by Tryslora

Original (Welcome to PHU) || Colt/Leo (M/M) || General || No major warnings apply || 2,200 words || Complete

Summary: Emma's only been with Colt & Leo for a few weeks, but that doesn't make her any less of a daughter to them. Of course they're going to her class Valentine's Day party.

Other tags: foster kids, foster parents, valentine's day, fluff, a little angst

***

Sunflower by @missroserose

Stranger Things || Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 3,752 words || Complete

Summary: Steve's college roommate, Billy Hargrove, is the worst and best first roommate Steve could've asked for.

Other tags: Alternate Universe - Roommates, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - College/University, Pining, Mild Instagram Stalking, Pop music, Sharing Clothes, Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Anal Fingering, Coming Untouched, Fluff and Smut

***

The Only One by @braezenkitty

Supernatural || Dean/Cas || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 708 words || Complete

Summary: A 14x13 coda

Other tags: Drinking & Talking, Coda, First Kiss, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss

***

fist-shaped holes by @froggydarren

Teen Wolf || Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski || General || No major warnings apply || 1,123 words || Complete

Summary: The loft is home in a strange way. With all the memories associated with it, good and bad, it's the one place that everyone in the pack is familiar with. That's the main reason why Derek has held on to the building even though for a long time, it was lying empty.

Other tags: Future Fic, Post Canon, Established Relationship, Memories

***

Have you posted a fic recently?  Any active WWM participant can Submit your fic here by midnight EST Wednesday and it will be included on next Friday’s WWM Fic Roundup post.

[weekendwritingmarathon]

This weekly roundup includes fics written (at least in part) during the 1k1h sprints and/or the Weekend Writing Marathon events.

Fics are ordered first by fandom, then by word count from smallest to largest.

***

Dance Competition by @melimegreenleaf

Avengers Academy (Video Game) || Loki/Janet Van Dyne || General || No major warnings apply || 422 words

Summary: Loki challenges Janet to a dance competition.

Other Tags: Lady Loki, Humor, Dancing

***

Trellis by @enoliel​

Captain America - MCU || Bucky/Nat || Mature || No major warnings apply || 2,408 words

Summary: Life in Haven was pure. Judith was devoted, but following the Light required perfection, and discipline and punishment were the tools to achieve that state. It was known and understood, as fundamental as breathing air. Until the fire and the late summer rain stole her away.

Other Tags: Outsider POV, OFC, Kidnapping, Anxiety attack, Mentions of past abuse, domestic fluff, food as a metaphor for love, smut, voyeurism, dub-con voyeurism, worldview shifts

***

Meeting in the E.R. by @melimegreenleaf

Stargate SG-1 || Samantha "Sam" Carter/Janet Fraiser || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 2,175 words

Summary: Janet is working in the E.R. when someone comes in having been hurt while rescuing a cat.

Other Tags: Alternate Universe - Medical, First Meetings, First Dates

***

Cas’ Gift by @braezenkitty

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 100 words

Summary: Thanks to a suggestion from Sam, Cas gets Dean exactly what he doesn't realize he wants for his birthday.

Other Tags: birthday, drabble

***

20 Minutes Late by @treefrogie84​

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester/Crowley || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 500 words

Summary: Crowley's not even late, that's the stupid thing. They just got started early.

Other Tags: recreational drug use (pot), stoner!cas, stoner!dean, stoner!crowley, established relationship

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Everywhere by @50shadesofsubtext​

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester || Mature || No major warnings apply || 563 words

Summary: Dean meets Cas at the airport after a summer apart.

Other Tags: Meeting at the airport, Fluff, College

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Feelings by @50shadesofsubtext​

Supernatural, Wayward Sisters || Claire Novak/Kaia Nieves || General || No major warnings apply || 758 words

Summary: Claire drags Kaia to the coffee shop to look at cute girls, but she didn't know Kaia only went to spend time with her.

Other Tags: Fluff, Coffee shop au, Friends to lovers

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Danny’s Song by @50shadesofsubtext

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester, Gabriel/Sam Winchester || General || No major warnings apply || 913 words

Summary: Dean and Cas find out they are going to be parents.

Other Tags: Adoption, Kid Fic, Parenthood, Domestic Fluff

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Simple Man by @50shadesofsubtext

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester || General || No major warnings apply || 1,256 words

Summary: Thanks to a suggestion from Sam, Cas gets Dean exactly what he doesn't realize he wants for his birthday.

Other Tags: birthday, drabble

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Darlings of the Night... by @fpwoper

Supernatural || Dean/Cas/Jimmy || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 1,266 words

Summary: Dean is a possessive little bastard sometimes, especially when the twins go out of their way to fuck with him.

Other Tags: Jealous Dean, Dean is Not Amused, Castiel and Jimmy Novak Are Twins, Dancing

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...all broken in the morning by @fpwoper

Supernatural || Dean/Cas/Jimmy || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 1,943 words

Summary: Jimmy has to be punished for what he did. Prompt: “Wrap your hands around my throat.” (Part of the "Darlings of the Night" series)

Other Tags: Castiel and Jimmy Novak Are Twins, erotic asphyxiation, BDSM, Needy Bottom Jimmy Novak, Castiel is a brat, Jimmy is a Brat, Sub Jimmy Novak, Sub Castiel, Dom Dean, I think I tagged it all

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(No) Vacancy by @skybound2

Supernatural || Crowley/Dean Winchester || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 5,800 words

Summary: When Crowley imagined his own afterlife, it was bleak. Empty. He assumed there was nothing that would be awaiting him when he met his final death. He was wrong.

Other Tags: Afterlife AU, Crowley Lives, Post-S12E23,

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A Secret Gate by @treefrogie84

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester, Charlie/Jess || Mature || No major warnings apply || 36,746 words

Summary: Dean has already had a long day and just wants a cup of coffee. Getting pulled across universes was not in his plans for the evening, neither was bringing someone home from that universe. And then his new companion sends everything thing spinning out of control.

Other Tags: Witch Castiel, Alternate Universe - Magical Realism, Dean Winchester and Sam Winchester Fight, Lonely Castiel, Lonely Dean, loss of agency due to outside forces

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The TiME Between by @worldlyshuku

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 47,572 words

Summary: Castiel Novak and Dean Winchester have been matched as soulmates by their TiMERs. Dean isn't ready to commit a lifetime to a man – cause, well, he's not gay, dammit; doesn't matter that he'd already had a drunken one-night stand with the guy six months ago. Castiel is determined to let Dean come to him on his own terms, something that takes time and a ridiculous amount of patience. Or, the moments in Dean's life that finally finally draw him closer to his soulmate, Castiel.

Other Tags: Soulmate AU, All Human AU, Pre-Relationship, Slow Build, Past Lisa Braeden/Dean Winchester, Other Ships Not Mentioned, POV Third Person

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Today 4 U by @shiphitsthefan​

The Big C (TV), Charlie Countryman (2013), Hannibal (TV), Rent - Larson || Lee Fallon/Nigel (Charlie Countryman) || Mature || No major warnings apply || 8,148 words

Summary: Lee knows Nigel, his solemn downstairs neighbor, from their HIV support group. He didn't expect to come home from his shift at the Cat Scratch Club to a distraught Nigel at his door, candle in hand, ready to relapse. There's no way Lee's leaving him alone, not tonight. It's December 25th, two AM, Eastern Standard Time. From here on in, they live without a script.

Other Tags: Alternate Universe - RENT Fusion, Alternate Universe - 1980s, HIV/AIDS, Stripper Lee, Sex Worker Positivity, Recovering Addict Nigel, Past Heroin Abuse, Intervention, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Lapdance, Happy Ending

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no easy way to say goodbye by @tryslora​

Welcome to PHU || None || Teen & up || Major Character Death || 3,681 words

Summary: This week, I have a short story for you which is a snippet from Mac’s history. Be warned, this is the story that explains why Mac understands anger, why she understands grief, why she’s cried on Chris’s shoulder, and why she’s lashed out in the past. This is the story of how and why Mac left the military. So yes, it’s 3,681 words of anger and angst. But remember, this is in the past, and our Mac is happier now. More centered. Recovering. This is not her forever.

Other Tags: Grief, Anger, Magic, Canon Backstory

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so he won’t fly away by @tryslora​

Welcome to PHU || Alaric Herne/Christopher Stone || Explicit || Author chooses not to give major warnings || 7,761 words

Summary: Alaric’s first Clan Conclave as heir is complicated. Alaric has to navigate the path of Clan politics, and find others who might think like himself. Chris might be the only human in attendance, but he’s also the only one who can anchor Alaric in the midst of his anxiety.

Other Tags: Canon Compliant, Held Down, Shapeshifting, Full Shift Shapeshifters, Light Dom/sub, Politics, Political Alliances, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Aftercare, Semi-Public Bathing, Dragon, Anxiety, Wrists, Anchors

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Have you posted a fic written at least partially during a WWM event? Submit your fic here by midnight EST Monday and it will be included on next Wednesday’s WWM Fic Roundup post.

[weekendwritingmarathon]

This weekly roundup includes fics written (at least in part) during the 1k1h sprints and/or the Weekend Writing Marathon events.

Fics are ordered first by fandom, then by word count from smallest to largest.

Under the cut because this is a hefty list covering the last couple weeks...

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Lost Warden by @myrddinderwydd

Dragon Age || Warden Alistair & Hero of Ferelden || General || No major warnings apply || 4,731 words

Summary: Alistair and his Warden have been brought together at Skyhold by friends and fate, but there is another surprise in store for them when they meet Fiona. SFW.

Other Tags: Alistair & Fiona (Dragon Age), Warden Alistair/Female Warden, Fiona/Maric TheirinAlistair (Dragon Age), Fiona (Dragon Age), Female Warden (Dragon Age), Grey Warden(s), Lavellan (Dragon Age), Mother-Son Relationship, Warden Alistair,  Book: Dragon Age - The Calling, First Meetings, Grey Wardens, Alistair Finds Out Fiona Is His Mother, Long Lost/Secret Relatives, POV Alistair, POV Fiona, POV Warden

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Northeast Monster of Highest Grade by @adorablejared

Gilmore Girls || Dean Forester & Luke Danes || General || Graphic Depictions of Violence || 2,134 words

Summary: Luke hated most aspects of Stars Hollow-the people, the commotion, the fact that basically everyone's a monster...he could go on and on. But there are the little things that he enjoys about the town, small things that he would never admit to anyone else. This was Stars Hollow, however-nobody can have a normal night without a monster involved.

Other Tags:   werewolf!Dean, hunter!Luke, supernatural elements, supernatural town, a near werewolf transformation, alternate universe

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Solace by @katieattherink

Star Wars Legends || Wedge Antilles/Tycho Celchu || General || No major warnings apply || 913 words

Summary: “You don't look so good, boss.” Wedge starts at the voice, tries to jerk out from under the hand that lands on his arm, but Tycho holds firm, blue eyes frowning at him. Of course he knows exactly what's going on. Unable to put it into words, Wedge only shakes his head.

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After Hours by @braezenkitty

Supernatural || Crowley/Dean Winchester || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 2,033 words

Summary: Dean convinces Crowley to head back to The Black Spur for a little after hours fun.

Other Tags: Semi-Public Sex, Pool Table Sex, Impact Play, Spanking, Come as Lube, Hand Jobs, Teasing, Dom/sub, Dom Dean, Sub Crowley (Supernatural)

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Cat and Mouse by @braezenkitty

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester || Explicit || Author chooses not to give major warnings || 3,073 words

Summary: Detective Dean Winchester has been chasing Russian mafia boss Castiel Krushnic for most of his career, but can never quite keep him locked up.

Other Tags: Alternate Universe - 1940s, 1940s, Detective Dean, Russian Mafia, Mobster Castiel, Enemies to Lovers, Dubious Consent, Dubiously Consensual Blow Jobs, Blow Jobs, First Time Blow Jobs, Public Blow Jobs, Alley Blow Jobs, Anal Fingering, Public Sex

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The Martian, Starring Dean by @alyndra9

Supernatural || None || General || No major warnings apply || 6,000 words

Summary: Dean's bouncing through TV shows at the Trickster's whim, but another planet now? Why is he stuck sciencing the shit out of this? 

Other Tags: Episode: s05e08 Changing Channels, Road Trips

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A Match Made in Heaven by @profound-boning

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 10,600 words

Summary: On his way home that evening, he drives past a store he’s noticed a hundred times before but never actually checked it out. A brightly lit sign identifies the building as *Touched By An Angel* and the subtitle appears to be ‘Adult Boutique’ but Dean can’t really tell from this distance where he’s stopped at a red light. He chews on his lip for a moment. Really, wouldn’t that be more fun to check out than the Family Planning section at the pharmacy? En route to the condom aisle, Dean passes the section dedicated to bondage and he pauses at the display of ropes. Now *there’s* an idea… He only has a moment to scope it out though before he hears a familiar voice. “Dean?”

Other Tags: blind date, matchmaker charlie, teacher!dean, bad flirting, bad jokes, dean in glasses, sex on the first date, accidentally stalking your bf at work, bdsm, dom!cas, sub!dean,

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Lammas Night by @pherryt

Supernatural || Castiel/Dean Winchester || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 50,808 words

Summary: Dean and Sam Winchester have spent their whole lives on the road. All they ever wanted was to pass the Wizard Trials and find a place to settle down like normal people for once. But the Trials leave Sam less than well and Dean jumps at the first offer they get. What better way to start their new lives and give Sam a chance to recover than as the official Wizard for a small, simple town? There was no way that Dean could have anticipated that the sleepy little town wasn't as idyllic as he had been led to believe, that the job entailed more than Chief Crowley would ever admit, that their lives were in mortal danger and oh, that's right, the ghost of the last wizard who'd undertaken the post was now courting him. So much for the simple life... Dean must now decide by Lammas Night if he will banish or resurrect the ghost of Castiel – but no matter which way Dean decides, they still need to find out what happened to Castiel and why. And will they be next?

Other Tags: Temporary Character Death, Fantasy, Magic, ghost porn, Smut, some mild (unintentioned) Homophobia, dubious consent (but not really), soul bonds, Wizards, bed sharing, Sharing a Bed, tub sharing, sick!Sam, Hurt/Comfort

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Have you posted a fic written at least partially during a WWM event? Submit your fic here by midnight EST Monday and it will be included on next Wednesday’s WWM Fic Roundup post.