#a home that is unsafe is not one I can stay in
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Since October 7, I’ve lived in a strange place. Not a physical place, but a condition: a limbo between two worlds that both say “You don’t belong here.”
In Israel, I’m hated for opposing a war that many say they don’t support but still fight in, defend, or explain away as necessary. Abroad, I’m no longer welcome among those who say that all Israelis are colonizers.
I’m too Israeli to be a victim and too resistant to be a patriot. I’m in exile, even when I’m at home.
I’ve spoken publicly against this war from the very beginning. As a theater director, I’ve staged plays too politically charged to be performed in Israel, as well as the English-language premiere of a play about the siege of Gaza. I refused to serve in the army and have advocated against the occupation for years.
None of that seems to matter. I am Israeli, and that has become a verdict.
At a Shavuot dinner with my extended family, a relative complained about Arab food-delivery drivers. “These Arabs only know how to do two things with packages,” she said. “Steal them or blow them up.”
I told her that she sounded like a racist.
The whole table erupted into a debate about the war—one that everyone claimed to be against, even though one family member is a combat medic and another is enlisting. “What are you even doing here?” the host said to me. “What right do you have to speak? You didn’t serve.”
My father tried to defend me: “My son is a citizen. A pacifist. His views are sometimes hard for me to hear, but I respect them. This is a democracy. He has a right to speak.”
“If this was at your house,” the host snapped, “I’d get up and leave. But it’s my house.”
In other words: You leave.
The car ride home from Jerusalem was more than an hour. None of us spoke—not me, not my mother, not my father. The silence sat in the back seat, holding everything we didn’t know how to say.
A few days later, one of those family members texted me and said that with the views I hold, I should relinquish my Israeli citizenship.
I find it hard to judge this family member. He feels trapped in an impossible position: He is the father of a soldier fighting a war he himself doesn’t support; he is traumatized by the events of October 7. His anger is not abstract—it’s personal, protective, real.
A week later, I went to a concert in Tel Aviv with my father. An all-female group called Ha’Ivriot—the Hebrew Women—performed the songs I grew up on, the songs my father grew up on. The entire audience sang along. So did I. And then, in the middle of a verse, I started crying. What will become of this language? I wondered. What will become of this culture? We’ve managed to ruin it all.
In early spring, I attended a conference in Europe for cultural leaders from around the world. Forty participants had come together to imagine a common future. I arrived hopeful. I left hollowed.
Three participants never spoke with me, never made eye contact. My resistance to the war, artistic track record, activism—none of it seemed to factor in. Then, on the second-to-last day, one of them spoke during a public session about feeling psychologically unsafe at the gathering because, in their words, “the killer is in the room.” I understood instantly. The killer was me.
I didn’t respond. What was there to say? That I’m “one of the good ones”? There is no sentence that can soften a person’s decision to see you as irredeemable. Any response will only deepen the charge.
A few days later, I flew to Athens to help my girlfriend—also Israeli—set up her new life. She’d left Israel, unable to live with what our country had become. I joined her for a stretch, staying in her new neighborhood, trying to build something resembling a rhythm.
A Greek friend who runs an NGO invited me to a picnic in the park. I sat on a blanket next to a young artist from Cairo. We talked about Athens, about art. I liked him. And then he asked where I live.
“In between Israel and the U.S.,” I answered.
He stood up, without a word, and walked away.
Later that same evening, a Greek theater director said to me, “I’m sorry, but I’m very upset by the situation in your country. By your genocide.”
I told him that I, too, was very upset. That my girlfriend had left Israel because of it. That I’ve spoken out, and stood against it.
He blinked. I could see the machinery of his assumptions short-circuiting. He seemed not to know what to do with the three-dimensionality of the person in front of him.
Each morning, walking my girlfriend’s dog, I tried to feel ordinary. But graffiti was everywhere. Some of it called for a free Palestine—which I wholeheartedly support. But other messages stopped me cold: Save a life. Kill a Zionist. And, When an Israeli asks for coffee, serve him a coffee, beside a stencil of a scalding cup hitting a face. There was no room in those slogans for someone like me. Even the walls had made up their mind.
I understand the rage. The atrocities we’re witnessing—livestreamed, unrelenting—make empathy almost impossible. In a world of such suffering, simplification can feel like survival.
So I ask myself: Where should I go, as an Israeli pacifist?
My own relatives question whether I belong in Israel, because I criticize the troops in Gaza for the killing and starvation of Palestinians. Abroad, a theater colleague once told me to “go back to where you came from”—that I don’t belong in the land where I was born but in the lands where my ancestors faced pogroms and the Holocaust. Nuance has no currency in a world addicted to absolutes.
Of course, there are far greater tragedies than mine. Palestinians are being killed in Gaza, and Israeli hostages are still in captivity. I carry the weight of those horrors daily. I’m not comparing my suffering with theirs. But I do believe that if we want a different future, we need space to speak from wherever we are—even from the uncomfortable middle.
If both home and abroad demand allegiance over inquiry, and purity over complexity, what space is left for someone who stands for the right of both Palestinians and Israelis to live on the land?
When dissent is silenced as betrayal in one place and dismissed as irredeemable in another, who is allowed to imagine something other than perpetual war?
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so… in your opinion was there ever actually a good mayor of nyc? Because looking at the historical record it looks like anyone who tried to take any position on any problem of the city only made it worse
It’s untrue that all mayors of nyc are bad. They are all hated but most are qualified. They often have to choose which part of the city they prioritize. Most mayors specialize in what they wanted to get done.
like Bloomberg wanted the city to be an economic and cultural center. He beefed up the city cleaning and increased policing (are you seeing the trade offs?) nyc was considered too clean and too safe and too business friendly. This opened up Brooklyn tho. Upside? Lots of people moved there and started business, revitalizing areas that were full of broken buildings and unsafe streets for everyone of all colors. They also helped fund city schools and other stuff that property taxes pay for. Downside? Gentrification. A huge number of home owners sold and cultural institutions that were sustained by unhip, older, more ethnic residents of the city couldn’t afford to keep compared to a hipster bar or restaurant or apartment complex. Rents were cheaper but they didn’t stay that way.
I liked deblazio. Full stop. He was good on police and especially housing. He cared about the city and funny enough he would have gotten more done if it wasn’t for his feud with como.
I liked the mayor who fixed up the subways when I was a kid (Dinkins I think) there are a bunch. Even really terrible mayors like Giuliani were good at their thing (Giuliani actually was really law and order about corruption and organized crime.)
NYC has NEVER had a totally unqualified mayor or at least no one as unqualified and unrealistic as mamdani. I would literally believe in Pete Davidson to run the city better. At least he lives in the reality of nyc. Mamdani is so Twitter pilled he’s basically in a different reality. Just from what he proposed and what he’s done with himself so far you can tell he’s not ready to run a restaurant franchise let alone the largest most complex and economically significant city in America through its most difficult time since the 1970s when it was almost bankrupt.
It’s like electing a reality tv star to run the most powerful country in the world and give him a 100 year pandemic to navigate through … only nyc has fewer back ups and support systems if shit hits the fan. So … best not invest in a life there unless you are good with hard times… in a knife fighting kinda way.
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I have such an interesting relationship with the Mormon church.
It’s my home. It’s something I will return to when it’s safe. The core principles are something that I treasure and love and feel so strongly about.
But the actual institution is no longer a safe place for me.
Somewhere can be a home, even when it’s unsafe. You can have complicated, angry grieving feelings towards a home that is supposed to be safe.
The Mormon church is still my home. It’s where my heart is.
But sometimes the homes we love are unsafe and we have to leave until that home can be safe again— if it ever is.
I have faith that the Mormon church will eventually be safe again. But until then, it’s safer for me to find a new home.
#queerstake#mormon#queer mormon#lds#a home that is unsafe is not one I can stay in#but if it improves itself and becomes safe?#we can hope
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Anyway, if you're a fan of Bruce and Steph having a father/daughter relationship you should probably go read about Oliver and Mia.
#maybe i'm over stepping a little because I've only had Mia and Oliver for about three days#but I have read Green Arrow 2001 issues 1-46 in that time#and it really feels like they have the dynamic certain sections of fandom want Steph and Bruce to have#stephanie brown#bruce wayne#oliver queen#mia dearden#green arrow#speedy ii#spoiler#batman#robin iv#batgirl iii#listen#every couple of months someone makes a post about Steph telling Bruce she needs tampons/pads#and Bruce going overboard buying one of everything because he doesn't know what she likes#that's not Bruce Wayne#Bruce Wayne would probably go buy something#but he would also stay on the phone with her the whole time so he can lecture her about not being prepared#which is why Steph would never ask him to do it#there are so many other people she would ask first#but Mia and Oliver?#Yeah that's they're dynamic#Mia would 100% ask him to grab something on the way home#and he would come home several bags of over priced menstrual products#muttering the whole time about microplastics and unsafe chemicals#but also he bought the cheap ones too because he's not sure what exactly she likes#and her comfort matters more than his grips with chemical waste (though he'll never admit that) (she knows anyway)
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it’s 12:06 when the jingle of keys tells you he’s home.
rubbing sleep from your eyes, you straighten your nightclothes and switch on the floor lamp, lighting his path through the midnight shadows.
zayne enters the room just as you settle on the edge of the bed. his usual greeting, tired but warm, never comes.
he needs prompts, sometimes. conversation starters. so you give him one. “long day?”
no response.
“did something happen?” you try again. “i missed you today.”
still, he doesn’t answer. but he does turn around.
and zayne stands before you, looking at you—at your lap—with skittish uncertainty.
“i’m sorry for waking you,” he rasps quietly, eyes flitting from your face to your lap before settling on the floor.
“i’m glad you did. i said i missed you,” you reply, letting a fond smile grace your lips.
you don’t repeat the question—you don’t need to.
because when your eyes meet again and you beckon him forward, zayne sinks to his knees before you and, with a shuddering sigh, lays his head across your lap.
fighting your instincts, you resist the urge to coo at him. he’s fragile, right now. vulnerable. and if your care comes off as condescension, he’ll deem those things unsafe.
wordlessly, you pull him to your chest, running a careful hand through his thick onyx hair. and with the way he stays, it’s clear that silence was the right move.
moments pass, but zayne doesn’t calm; his breaths quicken, his body trembles. and when a low whimper leaves him, he abruptly retreats from your warmth, blinking profusely to no avail.
catching his reddened face in gentle hands, you stare into his teary eyes, swimming in sparkling pools of hazel. when your thumbs brush his cheeks, as tender as the smile on your face, those pools overflow.
as the first tears fall, you return him to your chest, stroking his hair between soft kisses. he’s quiet like this—how else would he be?—but his faint, muffled sobs pierce your heart like the loudest wail.
you don’t keep track of how long you hold him. for as long as he needs, you just do, letting the drops seep through your shirt and into your skin.
but as his tears dry and breaths even, zayne still won’t relax. he grows more tense, more rigid, and you can feel the heat of his apprehension—feel his unease over breaking down on you like this.
so you talk to him. tell him about your day, your mood, your plans for tomorrow—rerouting his mind until his shoulders slump from fatigue.
he’ll tell you when he’s ready. and until then, you’ll wait.
lulled by the comfort of your voice, zayne nuzzles further into your chest, where the soft vibrations mix with the steady pulse of your heartbeat.
before long, sleep consumes him. it’s dreamless.
#idc if this is ooc#i told you guys i wanted him to cry#he needs to cry#im making him cry#written very quickly and very tiredly#iris writes#love and deepspace#love and deepspace x reader#zayne x reader#love and deepspace zayne#love and deepspace angst#zayne angst#zayne fluff#love and deepspace fluff#lads#lads x reader#lads zayne#lads fluff#lads angst#lnds#lnds x reader#lnds zayne#lnds angst#lnds fluff#zayne li#zayne
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I've been seeing a lot of Discourse around outdoor cats that talks past one of the biggest problems addressing community cats/outdoor working cats so I thought I'd chime in with my two cents.
Many arguments I see just... don't think about the cats at all? Or don't consider the logistics of actually addressing the feral cat problem in a humane way. It's always about how outdoor cats shouldn't be outdoors, which is neither realistic nor helpful.
I used to volunteer at an municipal animal shelter in the USA that had a TNR program (Trap, Neuter, Return) and also adopted out community cats to local farms and businesses. Here's my side of the story.
"Your cat doesn't need to be outside" -- Yes, correct. Your domesticated (non-feral) house cat does not need to go outside at all. They can have a fully actualized life safely indoors. When I see this argument, proponents of indoor only cats are correct in most or all their arguments regarding this.
"Outdoor cats are the largest invasive species in the world, and decimate bird populations." -- This is also correct, and part of the reason why you can help by bringing your house cat indoors. Cats are the largest invasive species. Spay and Neuter your cats, bring them inside, and socialize them so they don't become feral.
"TNR doesn't work." -- False. Whether we like it or not, feral cats exist. We have two methods by which we can address the feral cat population -- decimating them (humanely euthanizing the whole colony) or TNR. For a long time, euthanasia was the preferred way to address the feral cat problem. Afterall, if the cats aren't there, doesn't that save the local wildlife population?
Except that we found, studying these colonies, that when a colony is wiped out, the cats of another colony will spread into their territory and continue to have kittens and the population of feral cats is neither controlled nor diminished.
Hence, TNR. What we found performing TNR on cat colonies was that this controlled the population of the colonies, allowing them to stay in their territory, which kept other colonies from spreading (especially colonies we hadn't performed TNR on yet). We at the shelter felt this was the most humane way to control the feral cat population and safely deflate their existence without dealing with the population blooms that euthanasia caused.
"What about kittens?" -- Kittens from these colonies were brought into the shelter, socialized, and fostered out until they could be adopted. Some of these semi-feral kittens needed special homes to be adopted into, but this was the best quality of life for these cats.
"What about cats that get missed during TNR?" -- We would return to the colony several times over a period of several years to perform TNR on the same colony. We mark cats that have been neutered by clipping their ear (this is done humanely, but is the most reliable way to tell if a cat has been neutered so the poor thing doesn't have to have surgery 3-4 times in their life). Also, during the TNR process the cats would be vaccinated to ensure disease did not spread from the colony (i.e. rabies). Still, even getting 60% of the colony TNR'd would dramatically reduce the number of kittens being added to the colony each year. This controlled the population by allowing the territory to naturally deflate in size over time, buying us time to address the larger feral cat problem.
"What if the colony was in an unsafe location?" -- There were two ways we addressed unsafe colony locations -- remember, we know that when the colony is removed, a new colony will move into its place, so we tried not to move the colony unless we really felt the cats or the public was unsafe -- one was to move the whole colony to a new location. Preferably someplace like a warehouse where we have an agreement with the owners of the warehouse. Some of the cats were even relocated to shelter grounds as our community cats. If the colony was small enough we would bring them into our Feral Cats room and adopt them out as community cats.
"What is a community cat?" -- The way the program worked, was that anyone who needed a working cat could apply to the program. These were often rural farmers or businesses with warehouses that needed rodent protection. We trained the farmers and businesses on how to acclimatize the cats to their new home, and as part of the agreement, they had to care for the cats (veterinary care, vaccinations, food and water). This gave businesses and farms an alternative to expensive and environmentally unfriendly rodent control, and also gave these feral cats good places to live out their natural lives.
"Can't you just adopt out feral cats?" -- No. Cats that have not been socialized around humans as kittens, or who have several generations of feral cat in them could not interact with humans in a way that did not cause them undue stress. This was not a humane way to handle feral cats. However, when a cat was brought into the feral cat room, they would be monitored for up to a week. If the cat displayed signs of being semi-social or fully social (hanging out outside of their den, allowing staff to pet them, showing interest in staff in the room), then we would either move the cat into the adoption room or place them in foster to be socialized before adoption. Feral cats who displayed signs of being able to live full and healthy lives with human companions were NOT adopted out as community cats. We also observed this behavior during TNRs and would do the same for those cats too.
"But aren't cats bad hunters?" -- Compared to other species, cats are not the most effective form of rodent control. This is true. However, you have to understand that feral cats exist. There is no "undo" button we can push to stop them from existing. We have to deal with the problem we have right now, which is to safely and humanely decrease the number of feral cats in our communities. And yes, we do that by using cats as rodent control in the community.
"What can I do?" -- Stop saying community cats shouldn't exist. That's not helpful and doesn't solve the problem we have. Bring your cat indoors. Spay and neuter your cats. Adopt from shelters. Volunteer with a TNR team. Support TNR efforts in your community. Recognize that those of us actively dealing with the community/feral problem are trying to do what is in the best interest of our communities and the animals we love. We aren't sitting over here saying these cats should exist -- a feral cat will not have the same quality of life as one that is indoors with a family -- but we have to address the problem in practical terms. We don't have the moral high ground to just do nothing while pontificating solutions that have no basis in actuality.
And yes, it's okay to celebrate community cats. If your local farm has a couple of working cats, that means that farm is helping participate in the safe deflation of the feral cat population. Don't shame a farm or business for using community cats. We're all doing the best we can to solve the problem that we have.
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Lost and Found
Lando Norris x Reader
Summary: one minute Lando Norris is speeding through the streets of New York City — the world at his fingertips in the days leading up to the United States Grand Prix — and the next his world is spinning out of control, leaving him with nothing except for blank memories and the concerned attention of a stranger who takes him in when he has no one and nothing else
Warnings: descriptions of a car crash and memory loss
The night is cold, and the sharp October wind slips under your jacket as you tug it tighter around you. Your boots slap against the pavement, the rhythm a steady beat on the nearly deserted street. Columbia’s library closed an hour ago, but you stayed later than you should have. Deadlines don’t wait. Law school doesn't wait. Life doesn’t wait.
You tuck your phone into your pocket, your eyes fixed on the glowing windows of the apartment building a few blocks ahead. Almost home. Almost there.
And then-
A car rips past, tires screeching loud enough to make you flinch. It’s moving too fast, way too fast, the engine growling like an animal barely kept on a leash. You freeze for a second as it flies down the street, headlights smearing into long streaks of white. Your breath catches-
It spins. A brutal, violent twist as the car skids into a corner it shouldn’t be taking. The rear fishtails wildly. For a heartbeat, it looks like it might recover. Then it slams straight into a lamp post with a sickening crunch. Metal screams. Glass explodes. The lamp shudders, flickers, and dies.
For a moment, everything is still. Silent, even.
“Shit,” you whisper, your pulse spiking hard and fast.
You stand there, frozen in the chilly air, your brain catching up to what you just saw. The street is deserted — of course it is. This isn’t exactly rush hour. There’s no one around. No witnesses. No help.
Without thinking, you yank your phone out of your pocket and dial. The ringing in your ear seems to go on forever.
“911, what’s your emergency?” A woman asks briskly.
“A car crash,” you say, already moving toward the wreck. Your feet hit the pavement harder now, the soles of your boots slapping in quick bursts. “Corner of … uh, 116th and Riverside. It’s bad — the car’s totaled. I think someone’s still inside.”
“Are you with the driver now?”
“Not yet. I’m — I’m crossing the street.” You dodge between two parked cars and jog to the other side. The car sits under the broken streetlamp, its front end wrapped around the post like it lost a fight it never stood a chance of winning. The glossy surface is crumpled and shattered, shards of glass glittering on the asphalt like broken stars.
“Ma’am, do not approach the vehicle if it’s unsafe.”
You ignore that. “I think the guy’s still in there,” you mutter, holding the phone tight between your ear and shoulder. You grip the door handle and pull hard, but it’s jammed. With a frustrated grunt, you throw your weight into it until it finally groans open.
The first thing you notice is the smell — leather, gasoline, and the acrid tang of burned rubber. Your heart pounds in your throat. You glance at the man slumped in the driver’s seat, and the breath catches in your chest.
“Hello?” You ask, bending down, peering closer. “Can you hear me?”
He groans, shifting a little, but his eyes remain half-closed. Blood trickles from a cut above his eyebrow, carving a red path down the side of his face.
“Hey! Are you okay?” You try again, louder this time. No answer — just a sluggish movement of his head, like he's fighting to stay conscious.
“What's your name?” You keep your voice firm but gentle, the way you imagine an EMT might sound.
The man mumbles something, his voice thick and slurred. You lean closer, your pulse hammering in your ears.
“What? I need your name.”
“Lando,” he whispers, and it’s barely audible, more breath than word.
You frown. The name sounds familiar, but that’s not important right now. “Okay, Lando. Do you know where you are?”
His eyelids flutter, and for a second, it looks like he might pass out entirely. Then he forces them open again, just barely.
“Crash,” he mutters. “Crashed the car.”
“Yeah, no kidding,” you mutter under your breath, more to yourself than him. You glance around the street again, hoping for flashing lights in the distance. Nothing. Just you, him, and the wreckage.
“Can you tell me what hurts?” You ask, trying to keep him talking. Concussions are dangerous — keeping him conscious feels important.
Lando’s head lolls against the seat. “Feels like … everything.”
His voice is thick, heavy with exhaustion. He sounds like someone who’s been through the wringer, someone who desperately needs sleep but can’t afford to close their eyes.
“You hit your head pretty hard,” you say, scanning him for any other obvious injuries. Blood stains the collar of his jacket, but nothing looks life-threatening. Yet.
“Race car driver,” Lando slurs suddenly, like the thought just stumbled out of his brain without permission.
You blink. “What?”
“Race … car driver,” he repeats, slower this time. His accent drags on the vowels, a little British, a little something else.
You raise an eyebrow, convinced now that he’s concussed. “Right. And I’m the Queen of England.”
He gives a small, incoherent laugh, like your joke made perfect sense in his scrambled mind.
“You're not supposed to be funny,” he mutters, more to himself than you.
You glance back at the wreck, taking in the sleek lines and bright logo on the hood — McLaren. Expensive. Stupidly expensive. You bite the inside of your cheek.
“Jesus, you’re one of those guys,” you mutter, dragging a hand down your face. Rich kid, fast car, bad decisions. You’ve seen this movie before, and it usually ends with someone like him getting bailed out by daddy’s lawyer.
Lando stirs again, his head rolling toward you. “Not … like that,” he mumbles. “I am a race car driver.”
You roll your eyes, but there’s no bite to it. He’s barely coherent — humoring him feels kinder than arguing. “Sure you are, buddy. Sure you are.”
He squints at you, his expression dazed but oddly sincere, like he’s genuinely offended you don’t believe him. “I am,” he insists, as if that settles the matter.
You press your lips together, trying not to laugh. It’s absurd — this whole situation is absurd. You crouch lower, resting your hand lightly on his arm. “Just stay awake, okay? Ambulance is on the way.”
Lando hums something that might be agreement, though it sounds more like a sigh. His eyes droop again, dangerously close to shutting.
“Hey.” You give his arm a small shake. “No sleeping. Talk to me.”
“‘Bout what?” He murmurs, his head lolling to the side.
“Anything. Tell me …“ You scramble for something. “What’s your favorite color?”
He blinks slowly, like it’s the most confusing question anyone’s ever asked him. “Blue. No, wait … orange.”
You snort. “Make up your mind, race car driver.”
Lando makes a sound halfway between a laugh and a groan. “Can’t.”
“That concussion is doing wonders for your decision-making skills,” you say dryly, glancing toward the street again. Still no lights. You tap your foot anxiously.
Lando shifts in his seat, his hand twitching like he’s trying to move but can’t quite manage it. “You’re … bossy,” he mumbles, his accent thicker now.
“Yeah, well, you crashed your car, so you don’t get to complain.”
There’s a beat of silence, then he murmurs, “… Thanks for stopping.”
Something about the way he says it catches you off guard — soft, almost vulnerable. You swallow the lump in your throat and squeeze his arm gently.
“Don’t mention it, Lando.”
And then, finally, in the distance — a flash of red and blue lights.
***
The wail of sirens grows louder, slicing through the quiet night like a razor. Red and blue lights bounce off the buildings, streaking across shattered glass and twisted metal. Relief washes over you, making your knees feel a little shaky.
Finally.
Two ambulances come to a screeching halt. EMTs spill out, moving with practiced urgency. One of them, a tall woman with her hair yanked into a messy bun, jogs toward you.
“Are you hurt?” She asks, already looking you up and down for signs of injury.
You shake your head. “No, I’m fine — it’s the driver. He’s … he’s pretty out of it.” You glance back at Lando, slumped in his seat. “I think he hit his head. He’s not making much sense.”
The EMT follows your gaze, nodding sharply. “Okay, step back for me.” She waves another EMT over. “We’ve got one male, early twenties, possible head trauma.”
You move back as instructed, but not far — just enough to give them space to work while still close enough to watch. One of the EMTs wedges a tool into the doorframe to force it open wider, and the crunch of metal makes you wince.
“Hey, buddy,” the EMT says, leaning in toward Lando. “Can you hear me?”
Lando stirs slightly, his eyelids fluttering open. He mumbles something incomprehensible, and the EMT exchanges a look with his partner.
“Pupils look uneven,” the first EMT mutters, shining a small flashlight into Lando’s eyes. “Definitely concussed.”
The other EMT secures a neck brace around Lando’s head, locking it into place with quick, efficient movements. Lando groans at the pressure, his face twisted in confusion.
“We’re gonna get you out of here, okay?” The EMT says in a loud, clear voice. “Just stay still for me, mate. We’re gonna lift you.”
They maneuver him onto a backboard with a series of coordinated moves, careful to keep his neck stabilized. Lando lets out a soft groan but doesn’t resist — it’s like his body is on autopilot.
You cross your arms against the cold, biting your lower lip. They make it look so smooth, so clinical, but there’s something unsettling about watching someone get hauled out of a wreck like that, limp and helpless.
“Is he your boyfriend?” The EMT asks you, not looking up as they strap Lando to the board.
You blink, caught off guard. “What? No. I-I just saw the crash happen. I came over to help.”
The EMT nods once, focused on the task at hand. “All right. Appreciate you staying with him.”
They lift Lando, sliding the backboard onto a waiting gurney. He lets out a weak noise of discomfort, but his eyes remain half-lidded, barely clinging to consciousness.
As they wheel him toward the ambulance, you follow instinctively, your heart thrumming with worry. You can’t just leave now — not when he looks like that.
“Hey,” you call after them, your voice tight. “Can I … can I ride with him?”
One of the EMTs looks over his shoulder, frowning. “Are you family?”
“No. I just-“ You pause, unsure how to explain it. “I don’t feel right leaving him alone.”
The EMTs exchange glances. For a moment, it looks like they might refuse, but the woman in charge sighs and jerks her head toward the ambulance. “Fine. Get in. Just stay out of the way.”
“Thank you,” you say, relief flooding through you.
You climb into the back of the ambulance as they lift Lando’s gurney inside. The doors slam shut behind you, sealing you in with the hum of medical equipment and the faint smell of antiseptic.
The ambulance jerks into motion, the siren blaring overhead.
The EMT sitting across from you pulls on a pair of gloves, leaning over Lando. “Let’s see how we’re doing, champ.”
Lando’s eyes flicker, heavy and unfocused. The EMT checks his pulse, then takes a penlight and shines it directly into Lando’s pupils. He winces, groaning low in his throat.
“Sir, can you hear me?” The EMT asks loudly, as if trying to shake him awake with sound alone.
Lando blinks sluggishly, his brow furrowing. “… Yeah,” he mutters, barely audible. His accent makes the word sound more like yeh.
The EMT hums, jotting something down on a clipboard. “Good. Do you know where you are?”
Lando’s face twists in confusion. “Uh … car … crash?”
“That’s right. Do you know what day it is?”
Lando frowns, like the question is too complicated to process. “… Tuesday?” He guesses, though it sounds more like a question than an answer.
The EMT glances at you briefly, then back at Lando. “Close enough,” he mutters under his breath.
“Can you tell me your full name?”
“Lando Norris,” Lando slurs, then huffs, like just saying his own name took monumental effort.
“All right, Lando. You're doing okay, but you’ve probably got a concussion,” the EMT says, his tone calm but firm. “I need you to stay awake for me, yeah?”
Lando's eyelids droop again, dangerously close to closing. “M’tired,” he mumbles, his voice barely a whisper.
“I know you are, but you’ve gotta fight it. Stay with me, Lando.”
You lean forward, suddenly anxious. “Hey. Lando.” Your voice comes out sharper than you intended, but it gets his attention. His eyes flutter open, just barely.
“Stay awake, okay? Keep talking.”
He shifts sluggishly, his head rolling to the side. “‘Bout what?”
“Anything,” you say quickly, glancing at the EMT as if looking for backup. “Uh … tell me more about racing.”
Lando’s lips twitch, almost like a smile. “Fast,” he mumbles, and you can’t help but huff a quiet laugh.
“Yeah, I figured,” you say. “But, like … how fast?”
“Really fast,” he whispers, his voice trailing off into nothing. His eyes close again, and this time, they don’t reopen.
“Lando?” You reach out instinctively, your hand hovering over his arm. “Hey. Lando.”
The EMT leans in, tapping Lando's cheek with two fingers. “Come on, buddy. Wake up.”
Nothing. Lando’s breathing is steady but shallow, his head slack against the neck brace.
The EMT mutters a curse under his breath. “He’s out. Heart rate’s steady, but we’re not taking any chances.”
You feel a knot of anxiety tighten in your chest. “Is that bad?” You ask, your voice smaller than you'd like.
“It’s not good,” the EMT says bluntly. He grabs a stethoscope and checks Lando’s breathing again. “We’re almost there. Just gotta keep him stable.”
The ambulance sways as it takes a corner, and you clutch the edge of the bench to steady yourself. Your heart is pounding now, loud and fast in your ears.
You watch the EMT work, every movement precise and deliberate, but it still feels like time is dragging, like the ambulance isn’t moving fast enough.
The siren wails overhead, a sharp, urgent reminder of how serious this is.
You glance at Lando’s face — pale, slack, and too still — and something twists painfully in your chest. You don’t even know this guy, not really, but the thought of him not waking up feels … wrong.
“Hang in there, Lando,” you whisper, more to yourself than to him.
The ambulance jerks to a halt, and the EMT presses a button to radio the hospital. “ETA sixty seconds. Unconscious male, suspected head trauma. Prep trauma room two.”
Your stomach flips as the doors fly open, and two more EMTs appear, ready to unload.
The gurney jerks as they lift it, and you follow closely behind, stepping out into the harsh fluorescent lights of the hospital bay. The cold air hits you again, but it barely registers.
The EMT glances over his shoulder at you as they wheel Lando inside. “This is where we leave you,” he says, not unkindly.
You nod, biting the inside of your cheek. “Right.”
The gurney disappears through the sliding glass doors, and you stand there for a moment, unsure what to do next.
The night air feels heavier now, the adrenaline ebbing away, leaving behind a strange emptiness.
***
The waiting room is cold, with that sterile, over-sanitized smell that clings to every surface. You sit awkwardly in a plastic chair, arms crossed tightly over your chest. It’s eerily quiet, except for the occasional squeak of sneakers on tile and the low murmur of nurses passing through. A vending machine hums softly against the far wall.
You’ve lost track of how long it’s been since they wheeled Lando through those double doors. An hour? Two? Time feels slippery here, twisting and turning in on itself, every minute stretching out longer than the last. You try scrolling through your phone, but nothing holds your attention. The adrenaline has drained from your system, leaving you restless and uneasy.
It would’ve been easy to leave after they took him inside. After all, he’s a complete stranger. But the thought of him waking up alone, disoriented and confused in a hospital bed, doesn’t sit right with you. And so, you wait.
A nurse pokes her head out of a side door at one point, scanning the room. Your heart jumps, but she’s only calling for someone else — a patient’s relative who stands up with a relieved sigh. The room empties little by little, families reuniting with loved ones or filing out into the night.
You shift in your seat, rubbing your hands together to stave off the chill. You could leave right now, go home, crawl into bed. But somehow, you know you won’t — not until you know Lando is okay.
Finally, after what feels like forever, the door swings open again. This time, it’s a physician in pale blue scrubs, holding a clipboard. He looks around the room, squinting under the fluorescent lights.
“Is anyone here with the car crash patient?” He asks, voice low but carrying through the empty space.
You stand up before you even realize what you’re doing. “I … I’m here.”
The doctor’s eyes flick over to you, eyebrows raised. “You’re with him?”
You hesitate, then nod. “Yeah. I mean, sort of. I was there when it happened.”
The doctor approaches, glancing down at his clipboard. “He’s stable,” he says, and you feel some of the tension ease from your shoulders. “He has a pretty severe concussion, though. He lost consciousness on the way here, but we were able to wake him up a little while ago.”
You let out a slow breath. “That’s good, right?”
“Yes and no,” the doctor replies, shifting his weight. “It looks like he has post-traumatic amnesia. He doesn’t seem to know who he is — doesn’t even remember his own name.”
Your stomach twists uncomfortably. “Amnesia?”
The doctor nods. “It’s not uncommon with head injuries like his. In most cases, the memory loss is temporary. But it’s hard to say how long it will take for him to regain his memories — could be hours, days, or longer.”
You swallow, trying to process that. “He didn’t have any ID on him?”
“No wallet, no phone. Nothing to tell us who he is.” The doctor frowns. “Do you know his name?”
You feel a flicker of panic — you barely know anything about him. But you remember something from the ambulance, a faint, slurred sentence buried in the fog of the night. “His first name is Lando,” you say slowly. “He told the EMT that much. I-“ You press your fingers to your temples, frustrated with yourself. “He also said his last name, but I can’t remember it right now. It was … it’s on the tip of my tongue.”
The doctor gives you a sympathetic nod. “That’s all right. At least we have a starting point.” He flips a page on his clipboard. “Lando … okay.” He pauses, then looks at you with a curious expression. “Are you related to him?”
“No,” you say quickly. “I just … I saw the crash and rode with him in the ambulance.”
The doctor tilts his head, studying you for a moment. “It’s unusual,” he says slowly, “but since he doesn’t seem to have anyone else with him … we could make an exception and let you visit him.”
You blink, surprised by the offer. “You would? Even though I’m not family?”
The doctor nods. “Under the circumstances, yes. He’s confused, disoriented. It might help him to see a familiar face — well, at least someone who’s been around since the accident.”
You hesitate for a beat, then nod. “Yeah. I’ll visit him.”
The doctor gives you a small smile, then gestures toward the door. “Follow me.”
Your heart beats a little faster as you trail behind him through the sterile hallways, passing closed doors and curtained-off spaces. The farther you go, the quieter it gets, until the only sounds are the soft squeak of your shoes on the linoleum and the faint buzz of fluorescent lights overhead.
Finally, the doctor stops in front of a room and gestures for you to go inside. “He’s still a bit groggy, but you can sit with him for a while.”
You nod, trying to swallow the lump in your throat, and push the door open.
The room is small, dimly lit by a single lamp on the wall. Lando lies in the bed, looking pale and disoriented, his dark curls sticking to his forehead. A bandage is wrapped around his head, and an IV drips steadily from a bag hooked to a pole beside the bed.
You step inside, and his gaze shifts toward you, though it’s clear he’s struggling to stay focused.
���Hey,” you say softly, pulling the chair closer to his bed. “How are you feeling?”
He blinks at you, his expression hazy with confusion. “I … I don’t know,” he mutters, his voice scratchy. “Where … where am I?”
“You’re in a hospital,” you explain gently. “You had a car accident.”
Lando frowns, his brow furrowing. “A car accident?”
“Yeah,” you say, leaning forward slightly. “It was pretty bad, but you’re going to be okay.”
He stares at you for a long moment, his gaze unfocused. “Do I … do I know you?”
You shake your head. “No, we just met — well, kind of. I was there when you crashed. I called for help and rode with you in the ambulance.”
Lando’s lips press together, as if he’s trying to make sense of your words. “Why?”
The question takes you by surprise. “Why what?”
“Why did you … stay?” He asks, his voice barely more than a whisper.
You hesitate, not entirely sure how to answer. “I don’t know,” you admit. “It just felt like the right thing to do.”
Lando gives a small, almost imperceptible nod, his eyes slipping shut for a moment. Then he opens them again, struggling to stay awake.
“You said my name is Lando?” He asks, his voice faint.
“Yeah,” you say softly. “That’s what you told me. Do you … remember anything else?”
Lando shakes his head slowly, frustration flickering across his face. “No,” he whispers. “Nothing.”
You offer him a small, reassuring smile. “That’s okay. It’ll come back to you. You just need to rest.”
He nods weakly, his eyelids drooping.
For a moment, the room is quiet, filled only with the soft hum of the IV drip and the distant sounds of the hospital outside.
“Thank you,” Lando murmurs suddenly, his voice barely audible.
You blink, caught off guard. “For what?”
“For staying,” he whispers. “For not leaving me alone.”
You feel a strange warmth spread through your chest at his words, unexpected but not unwelcome.
“Of course,” you say softly. “I wasn’t going to leave you.”
Lando’s eyes close again, his breathing evening out as he drifts off into an uneasy sleep.
You sit back in the chair, watching him for a moment longer, feeling oddly connected to this stranger — this man whose life, for reasons you can’t quite explain, has suddenly become intertwined with yours.
***
You wake up to the soft click of a door opening. For a moment, you’re disoriented — the sharp smell of antiseptic in the air and the hum of machines aren’t what you expect. Then it all comes rushing back: the crash, the ambulance, Lando.
You straighten in the uncomfortable hospital chair, your neck aching from the awkward position you slept in. A nurse in pale scrubs moves around the room quietly, checking Lando’s IV and jotting notes on her chart. She glances at you and offers a small smile.
“Good morning,” she says softly, like someone used to tiptoeing around the sick and injured.
You blink, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. “Morning. Is he …”
The nurse nods toward Lando. “Still sleeping. His vitals look stable, though.”
You glance at him. He’s shifted a little in his sleep, curled slightly on his side with the blanket pulled halfway up his chest. His face is peaceful, his breathing steady, and for a moment, it’s easy to forget the chaos of last night.
The nurse scribbles something else on her clipboard. “The doctor will be in soon to check on him. If he’s doing okay, we might start talking about discharge.”
You frown slightly. “Discharge? Already?”
The nurse gives a small shrug. “It’s common. Once someone is stable, there’s no reason to keep them here longer than necessary.”
Before you can respond, the door opens again, and the same physician from last night steps in, looking far more awake and put-together than you feel. He carries a folder tucked under one arm and offers a polite nod as he approaches Lando’s bed.
“Morning,” he says briskly, flipping through the papers. “Let’s see how our patient is doing.”
Lando stirs at the sound of voices, his brow furrowing slightly before his eyes flutter open. He blinks at the ceiling, clearly disoriented, and then his gaze shifts toward you.
“Hey,” you say softly, leaning forward. “How are you feeling?”
He squints at you, like he’s trying to place you in a dream that hasn’t fully faded. “I … I don’t know,” he mumbles. His voice is raspy, as if unused for too long. “Where …”
“The hospital,” you remind him gently. “You were in an accident. Do you remember?”
Lando’s expression crumples with frustration, and he shakes his head weakly. “No. I don’t remember anything.”
The doctor steps closer, setting the folder down on the bedside table. “It’s okay, Lando,” he says in a professional but kind tone. “You’ve had a serious concussion. Amnesia like this is not unusual. It may take some time for your memory to come back.”
Lando doesn’t respond. His hand rests on the blanket, fingers twitching slightly, as if he’s trying to grasp something just out of reach.
The physician clears his throat and flips through the imaging results. “We’ve run more tests, and everything looks good. No fractures, no swelling that we need to be concerned about. Medically speaking, you’re ready to be discharged.”
Lando stares at the doctor, his eyes wide with disbelief. “Discharged? But … I don’t even know who I am.”
The doctor sighs sympathetically. “I know it’s overwhelming, but there’s no medical reason to keep you here. Usually, when patients have amnesia, we recommend that they go home, rest, and be with family until their memory returns.”
Lando lets out a short, humorless laugh. “Right. Except I don’t even know if I have family.”
The doctor exchanges a glance with you, clearly uncomfortable. “We tried contacting local authorities, but without ID, there’s not much we can do to locate anyone for you right now. In the meantime …” He trails off, glancing at his watch. “You’ll need to find somewhere safe to rest. Hospitals aren’t designed for long stays in cases like this.”
You open your mouth to say something, but no words come out at first. A knot twists in your stomach — Lando looks so lost, sitting there in the stiff hospital bed with no memory of who he is or where he belongs.
And then, without thinking, you blurt out, “He can come home with me.”
The words hang in the air for a moment, heavy and unexpected.
Both Lando and the doctor turn to stare at you, identical looks of confusion written across their faces.
“What?” Lando asks, his voice thick with disbelief.
You blink, as if hearing yourself for the first time. “I mean … if he has nowhere else to go,” you say quickly, your heart racing. “It doesn’t feel right just … leaving him like this.”
The doctor looks at you like you’ve just volunteered to adopt a stray animal off the street. “Are you sure about that?” He asks cautiously. “Taking care of someone with memory loss can be challenging.”
You nod before you can second-guess yourself. “I’m sure. I can help him get settled until … until he remembers something.”
Lando’s brow furrows as he tries to process what’s happening. “You’re serious? I can’t even remember my own name, and you’re just … offering to let me stay with you?”
You shrug, trying to play it off like it’s no big deal. “It’s not like I’m going to just let you wander the streets of New York with a concussion.”
Lando huffs a soft laugh, though there’s no humor in it. “You have no idea who I am. I could be a serial killer or something.”
You raise an eyebrow. “Do you feel like a serial killer?”
He pauses, blinking at the question. “No. I just feel … confused.”
“Then we’ll take our chances,” you say, standing a little straighter.
The doctor looks between the two of you, clearly torn. “All right,” he says finally, scribbling something on his clipboard. “We’ll need you to sign some forms for his release. And …” He glances at Lando. “You’ll need to take it easy for the next few days — no strenuous activities, no driving, and absolutely no drinking.”
Lando nods slowly, still looking stunned by the turn of events.
The doctor finishes writing and tears off a sheet of paper, handing it to you. “Here are his discharge instructions. Make sure he rests and drinks plenty of fluids. If there’s any change — headaches, confusion, anything — bring him back right away.”
You nod, taking the paper. “Got it.”
The doctor gives a final nod before stepping toward the door. “A nurse will be in soon to help with the paperwork. Good luck.”
And with that, he’s gone, leaving you alone with Lando in the quiet room.
For a moment, neither of you speaks.
Lando breaks the silence first. “You’re really doing this?”
You glance at him, and for the first time, you realize how scared he must be — lost in a city he doesn’t remember, with no memory of who he is or where he belongs.
“Yeah,” you say softly. “I’m really doing this.”
Lando’s lips twitch, almost like he’s trying to smile but isn’t quite sure how. “You’re either very brave,” he mutters, “or very stupid.”
“Maybe a little of both,” you admit, and the corners of his mouth lift just slightly.
He looks down at the blanket covering his legs, running his fingers along the edge. “Thank you,” he says quietly.
“You don’t have to thank me,” you reply, standing up and smoothing out your wrinkled clothes. “Just … don’t make me regret it, okay?”
Lando glances up at you, his expression serious now. “I’ll try not to.”
There’s a knock at the door, and a nurse pokes her head in, holding a clipboard. “Ready to go?”
You nod, glancing at Lando. “Ready?”
He takes a deep breath, like he’s steeling himself for whatever comes next. “Yeah. Let’s do this.”
And with that, the two of you step into the unknown together.
***
The subway car rattles along the tracks, a steady clunk-clunk that fills the silence between you and Lando. He’s seated beside you, his head tilted back against the cold metal pole, watching the city blur past through the dirty windows. His posture is relaxed — almost too relaxed — but you can tell it’s not comfort. It’s exhaustion, both physical and emotional. Every so often, he glances at the other passengers with the wide-eyed caution of someone dropped into an unfamiliar world.
“You okay?” You ask, nudging his arm gently with your elbow.
He turns toward you, slow and deliberate, like even small movements take effort. “I guess. Just feels … weird.” He rubs his temple, the faint crease of a headache forming between his brows. “Everything’s moving so fast, and I can’t tell if that’s the world or just my brain being scrambled.”
“Definitely the world.” You try to smile, hoping it’ll ease some of the weight he’s carrying. “New York doesn’t stop for anyone. You get used to it.”
Lando offers a weak chuckle, but the sound fades quickly. “You do this every day?”
You shrug. “Pretty much. You learn how to block out the noise after a while.”
He leans his head back again, eyes drifting shut as if the conversation itself takes more energy than he has to spare. You glance at him, wondering what’s going through his mind — if he’s terrified, disoriented, or just trying to keep it together for your sake. Maybe all three.
When the subway screeches to a stop at your station, you nudge him again. “This is us.”
Lando blinks awake, dragging himself upright as you both stand. He follows you off the train, into the chaotic swirl of the station. The noise, the movement, the fluorescent lights — none of it fazes you, but you can feel him stiffen beside you as if it’s too much all at once.
You make your way to the stairs, weaving through the crowd with practiced ease, and Lando does his best to keep up. “This city is … a lot,” he mutters as you ascend to street level.
“Yeah.” You glance over your shoulder at him. “But it grows on you. Like a fungus.”
Lando snorts — an actual laugh this time, though it’s still edged with disbelief. “I think I’ll take your word for it.”
The two of you walk in silence for the few blocks to your apartment. It’s late morning by now, the streets bustling with people on errands or rushing to work. You pull your coat tighter against the breeze and glance at Lando, who’s walking beside you with his hands jammed deep into the pockets of the hospital-issued sweatpants.
When you finally reach your building, you unlock the front door and lead him up two flights of stairs. Your apartment isn’t much — a tiny one-bedroom with a narrow kitchen, mismatched furniture, and walls covered in posters and sticky notes. But it’s yours, and for now, it’ll be his too.
“Home sweet home,” you say, pushing the door open and stepping aside to let him in.
Lando hesitates in the doorway, his gaze sweeping the space. “This is where you live?” He asks, his tone curious rather than judgmental.
“Yep. Not exactly a palace, but it works.” You drop your keys on the counter and kick off your shoes, motioning for him to do the same. “Welcome to grad student life.”
He steps inside cautiously, as if the apartment might swallow him whole, and his eyes land on the piles of law books scattered across the coffee table, the kitchen counter, even the armrest of the couch. A legal pad covered in half-finished notes is open on the floor, surrounded by highlighters and empty coffee cups.
���It looks like a library threw up in here,” he says, eyebrows raised.
You let out a laugh, feeling a little self-conscious. “Yeah, sorry. It’s kind of … everywhere.”
He picks up one of the books from the table — Constitutional Law: Cases and Materials — and flips through the pages with an amused expression. “So … you’re a lawyer?”
“Not yet,” you correct, dropping your bag on the couch. “I’m still a student. Columbia Law.”
Lando sets the book down carefully, as if it might bite. “That sounds … intense.”
“It is.” You collapse onto the couch with a sigh, stretching your legs out. “It’s basically my whole life right now. Classes, studying, internships … sleep, if I’m lucky.”
Lando leans against the kitchen counter, crossing his arms over his chest. “You like it?”
You tilt your head, considering the question. “Yeah. I mean, it’s hard as hell, but I do. There’s something … satisfying about figuring things out, solving problems.”
He nods slowly, as if trying to imagine what that kind of life feels like. “So, you’re one of those people. The smart ones.”
You laugh. “I guess that depends on the day.”
Lando’s gaze drifts back to the books, his expression thoughtful. “And you’re just … letting me crash here. Even though you’ve got all this going on?”
You shrug, feeling a little awkward under his scrutiny. “It’s not a big deal.”
He gives you a look — one that says he doesn’t believe you for a second. “It’s kind of a big deal. I mean, I don’t even know who I am, and you brought me home.”
“Well, you didn’t seem like a serial killer.” You grin, trying to lighten the mood. “Plus, I’m pretty sure I could take you if it came down to it.”
Lando chuckles, the sound low and genuine this time. “Right. Because you’ve been training in MMA on the side.”
“Exactly.” You gesture to the couch. “That’s where you’ll sleep, by the way. Sorry it’s not a king-sized bed or anything.”
He glances at the couch, then back at you with a wry smile. “I’ve slept in worse places, I think.”
You raise an eyebrow. “You think?”
He shrugs, a sheepish grin tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Memory loss, remember?”
“Right.” You laugh, shaking your head. “Guess we’ll both find out what you’re used to.”
Lando walks over to the couch and sinks into it experimentally, testing the cushions. “It’s not bad,” he says after a moment. “I’ll survive.”
“Good. Because I’m fresh out of five-star hotels.”
He leans back, resting his head against the cushion, and closes his eyes for a moment. “Thanks,” he says quietly. “For … all of this. I know it’s weird.”
You wave a hand dismissively. “It’s not that weird.”
Lando opens one eye, giving you a skeptical look. “It’s definitely weird.”
“Okay, maybe a little.” You grin. “But life’s weird sometimes. You just roll with it.”
He chuckles softly, his eyes drifting shut again. “You make it sound easy.”
You watch him for a moment, the way his breathing slows, the tension easing from his shoulders bit by bit. There’s something oddly comforting about having someone else here, even if that someone is a total stranger who just happens to have lost his memory.
“You hungry?” You ask, standing up and stretching. “I’ve got … well, probably just instant noodles, but it’s food.”
Lando cracks a smile without opening his eyes. “Instant noodles sound like a feast right now.”
“High standards, I see,” you tease, heading to the kitchen.
As you fill a pot with water and set it on the stove, you can’t help but glance back at him. He’s still stretched out on the couch, looking more at peace than he has since you met him.
And somehow, in the middle of all this chaos, it feels right.
***
Steam rises from the bowls of instant noodles, curling into the dim air of your apartment. The two of you sit side by side on the couch, knees almost touching, slurping quietly while some mindless local news plays in the background. It’s not much, but there’s something comforting about the simplicity of it. For the first time all day, things feel … normal.
Lando scoops a forkful of noodles, twirling them slowly, like even eating requires focus. “So, this is gourmet cuisine?” He teases, a faint smile playing at the corner of his mouth.
“Hey, these are the premium kind,” you shoot back, nudging him with your elbow. “I even added an egg. That’s high-level cooking.”
He chuckles, the sound soft but genuine, and for a moment you think maybe — just maybe — he’s settling in. But then the newscaster’s voice shifts into something more urgent, drawing both of your attention.
“… the United States Grand Prix is set to take place this weekend in Austin, Texas, with the world’s top drivers arriving to compete in what promises to be a thrilling event …”
The screen cuts to footage of race cars whizzing by, sleek and impossibly fast, engines roaring like angry beasts. Drivers in fireproof suits pose for cameras, and somewhere in the background, a McLaren car gleams under stadium lights.
You glance at Lando. He’s sitting perfectly still, bowl of noodles forgotten in his lap. His eyes are glued to the screen, unblinking, as if the images are stirring something just out of reach — a half-buried memory fighting to resurface.
“Lando?” You say softly.
He doesn’t respond, just stares at the television like it’s showing him the key to his past. His fingers tighten around the bowl, knuckles going white.
“Does that … mean anything to you?” You ask cautiously, setting your own bowl aside. “The race?”
Lando’s mouth opens, but no sound comes out. His brow furrows deeply, frustration flickering across his features. He shakes his head slowly, like trying to sift through fog.
“I … I don’t know,” he mutters. “It feels … familiar. Like I should know something about it.”
You lean closer, watching his face carefully. “Do you think it’s connected to you? Maybe that’s-“
“I don’t know!” Lando snaps, his voice sharper than he intended. He winces immediately, guilt flashing in his eyes. “Sorry. I just … it’s right there, you know? Like I’m supposed to know why this matters, but I can’t grab it.”
“It’s okay,” you say quickly, hoping to calm him down. “It’s not your fault.”
Lando drags a hand down his face, breathing hard through his nose. “It’s just … frustrating,” he mutters, voice cracking. “Why can’t I remember? Why can’t I remember anything?”
The sheer helplessness in his voice makes your heart ache. You can see him trying so hard to stay composed, but it’s slipping. He blinks rapidly, his jaw tight, as if he’s on the verge of tears and doing everything in his power not to let them fall.
You set your hand on his arm gently. “Hey. It’s okay. You don’t have to force it.”
Lando shakes his head again, a bitter laugh escaping him. “It’s not okay. I don’t even know who I am. What kind of person forgets their whole life?”
“You’re not broken,” you tell him firmly. “You just had a really bad accident. Your brain’s protecting you, probably — it’ll come back when it’s ready.”
He looks at you, his eyes glossy, and for a moment he seems like a kid lost in a supermarket, scared and trying not to cry. “But what if it doesn’t?” His voice is small, filled with uncertainty. “What if I never remember?”
The vulnerability in his words catches you off guard. It’s strange, seeing someone like him — someone who carries himself like the world should make sense — crumble under the weight of something he can’t control.
You don’t know what to say. What can you say? You’re just a law student who happened to be in the right place at the wrong time. But you can’t leave him in this. You won’t.
“It’ll come back,” you say softly. “And until it does, you’re not alone, okay?”
Lando presses his lips together, nodding slightly even though he doesn’t look convinced. He tilts his head back, blinking hard, as if sheer willpower alone can force the tears away. You see the frustration etched in every movement, the way he clenches his jaw and digs his fingers into his palms.
“Why does this feel so familiar?” He whispers, more to himself than to you. “That car … the race … it’s like I know it, but it’s just out of reach. It’s right there, but I can’t …”
You squeeze his arm, grounding him. “We’ll figure it out. One step at a time.”
Lando exhales shakily, dragging his hands through his messy curls. “I feel … useless. Like I should be doing something, but I don’t even know what.”
“Hey,” you say softly. “You’re not useless. You survived a crash that should’ve been a lot worse. That’s already pretty impressive.”
He lets out a humorless laugh, wiping at his eyes. “Yeah. Real impressive. Can’t even remember my own name.”
“You remembered some of it,” you remind him. “That’s a start.”
Lando looks at you, his expression hovering between gratitude and exhaustion. “You didn’t have to do this, you know. Take me in. Deal with … whatever this is.”
You shrug. “I wasn’t about to leave you on your own.”
He stares at you for a long moment, as if he’s trying to memorize your face — or maybe trying to understand why a stranger would care enough to help him. Finally, he nods, a small but genuine gesture.
“Thanks,” he murmurs. “For everything.”
“Don’t mention it,” you reply, offering him a small smile. “We’ll take it one day at a time, okay? No pressure to remember everything all at once.”
Lando breathes out slowly, as if the weight of the moment is starting to lift, even if just a little. “Okay,” he whispers. “One day at a time.”
The two of you sit in comfortable silence for a moment, the hum of the TV filling the space between you. On the screen, the sports segment wraps up, and the anchor shifts to another story — something about a mayoral race you couldn’t care less about. But Lando keeps glancing at the TV, his gaze flickering with something you can’t quite place.
You watch him carefully, wondering what’s going through his mind. Maybe there’s more he remembers, things he can’t quite articulate yet. Or maybe the images of the race just stirred something instinctual — a feeling rather than a memory.
“Do you think …” Lando starts, then stops himself, biting his lip. “Do you think I was supposed to be there? At the race?”
You consider his question carefully. “It’s possible. I mean … maybe. But it’s also possible that it just feels familiar because you love racing. Maybe you were a fan.”
Lando doesn’t look convinced. “It feels … bigger than that. Like it’s important.”
“Well,” you say gently, “if it’s really that important, I’m sure it’ll come back to you.”
He nods, though his expression remains troubled. “Yeah. I hope so.”
You reach for the remote and turn the volume down, hoping it’ll give him some peace. “For now, just try to rest, okay? We can’t solve everything tonight.”
Lando leans back against the couch cushions, rubbing his eyes with the heel of his hand. “Right. One day at a time.”
You nod, settling back beside him. “Exactly.”
And for a moment — just a moment — the world feels a little quieter. A little more manageable. Neither of you knows what tomorrow will bring, but for now, you’re here. Together. And maybe, for tonight, that’s enough.
***
In Woking, the McLaren Technology Centre buzzes with the usual energy, but today, there’s a frantic undercurrent no one can quite contain. Engineers huddle over laptops, scrolling through telemetry and GPS data. Phones ring at an alarming frequency. It’s as though the entire organization holds its breath, waiting for a disaster they can’t fully comprehend but know is happening.
Zak Brown slams his phone down on the desk in his office, his jaw tight with frustration. “No answer. Nothing. It just goes to voicemail,” he says, pacing. His voice carries out into the open office space, drawing glances from staff nearby.
“Same here,” a voice pipes up from the other side of the room. Andrea Stella looks exhausted, cradling his phone against his ear. “No response to texts. No one at the hotel he was supposed to check into has seen him. And his phone’s not pinging anymore — it’s like it just went dark.”
Zak rakes a hand through his short, cropped hair, then exhales sharply. “We’re five days away from Austin. Five. Freaking. Days. And we’ve lost our damn driver.”
The words hang in the air, heavy with anxiety. The silence is punctuated only by the soft hum of computers and the occasional tap of keyboards. No one dares say what they’re all thinking: If Lando doesn’t show, they’re down a driver for one of the most critical races of the season.
Andrea leans back in his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose. “He was in New York,” he mutters, more to himself than to anyone else. “Why did he even go to New York? He was supposed to meet us in Austin straight away.”
Zak shrugs, his hands flying in frustration. “Lando said he wanted a couple of days to himself before the race. Some break or whatever. I figured — he works hard, let him have it. What’s the worst that could happen?”
Apparently, the worst did happen.
Over by the giant wall of monitors tracking everything from car data to driver schedules, one of the comms coordinators speaks up. “We haven’t been able to track his car since yesterday. No activity. Not even location pings.”
Zak swears under his breath and turns toward Andrea. “We need to start contingency planning. This is serious. If he’s not in Austin in the next day or so, we’ve gotta be ready.”
Andrea doesn’t reply right away. His mind churns through endless scenarios, none of them promising. Do they scramble to find a reserve driver? Call Pato O’Ward or Ryo Hirakawa? That would be a media frenzy in itself. But that’s a worst-case option — first, they need to find Lando.
“Have we checked his family? Friends? Girlfriends?” Zak asks, rubbing his temples.
“We tried his parents,” Andrea replies with a sigh. “His mum thought he was already in Austin. She hasn’t heard from him in over 24 hours either.”
“Girlfriend?” Zak asks.
“He doesn’t have one.” Andrea’s tone is clipped, as if that fact only makes the situation more frustrating. “He’s not exactly the relationship type.”
Zak mutters another curse. “Christ. He’s alone, halfway across the world, and we have no idea where the hell he is.”
The weight of that statement sinks in. It’s not just that Lando isn’t answering his phone — it’s the growing realization that something might have gone terribly wrong.
***
In another corner of the office, the team’s director of communications, Sophie, types furiously into her laptop. Every time she hits send on an email, another response pings back: negative. Nothing. No one knows anything.
“Has anyone checked the airlines?” She calls out. “If he was flying through New York, maybe there’s a record of him checking in somewhere?”
“We’re working on it,” one of the logistics guys responds, flicking through tabs on his screen. “But it’s hard to get anything without specific flight details.”
Sophie sighs and looks over at Zak and Andrea, who are still pacing near the windows. “Do you want me to draft a public statement?” She asks tentatively. “Just in case?”
Zak freezes. “No. Absolutely not. The second the media gets wind of this, it’ll turn into a circus. We’ll have paparazzi crawling over every hotel and airport in New York. We can’t afford that distraction.”
“But if he doesn’t show soon,” Sophie presses, “we might not have a choice. People will notice if he’s missing from Austin.”
Andrea folds his arms, his expression grim. “We’ve got 48 hours, tops. After that, people will start asking questions.”
Zak rubs his face, exhaustion creeping into his every movement. “Goddamn it, Lando.”
There’s a collective silence as the weight of the situation settles over the room. No one says it out loud, but they’re all thinking the same thing: Something has gone terribly wrong.
Sophie speaks up again, her voice quieter now. “We could … call the local authorities in New York? Just to see if anything’s been reported. An accident or-”
“No.” Zak cuts her off sharply, though there’s no bite behind the word — just fear. He doesn’t want to think about the possibility of Lando being hurt. Or worse.
But Andrea is already nodding. “Do it,” he says to Sophie. “Just discreetly. Don’t mention his name. See if they’ve had any reports matching his description.”
Sophie hesitates, then nods and picks up her phone, already pulling up contact numbers.
Zak looks over at Andrea, his jaw tight. “If something’s happened to him …”
“We’ll find him,” Andrea says firmly, though even he doesn’t sound entirely convinced.
Zak turns to the logistics guy. “Book me the next flight to New York. I’ll go myself if I have to.”
Andrea grabs Zak’s arm. “Wait. If you go running to New York, it’ll raise questions. We don’t want anyone finding out about this before we know what’s going on.”
Zak exhales sharply but nods. “You’re right.” He looks around the room, addressing everyone. “We keep this quiet. No leaks. No media.”
Everyone nods in unison, the weight of the unspoken agreement heavy in the air.
“Sophie,” Andrea says, turning back to her. “If the police don’t have anything … try the hospitals.”
“Already on it,” she replies, tapping at her phone.
Zak mutters under his breath, pacing again. “He better be okay.”
Andrea glances at the clock on the wall. Every second that ticks by feels heavier, more oppressive. The race in Austin is looming, and with each passing hour, their chance of finding Lando before everything unravels gets slimmer.
They have no idea what’s happened, no idea where Lando is, and no one to call for answers. All they can do is wait, and hope.
***
The morning sun streams through the thin curtains, casting a soft glow over your cluttered apartment. The smell of coffee lingers in the air, mixing with the faint sound of toast popping from the toaster. Lando sits across from you at the small kitchen table, his face scrunched in exaggerated misery. He’s been pouting for at least ten minutes now, stirring his cereal like it’s personally offended him.
“You’re seriously leaving me here? Alone?” His voice drips with disbelief, spoon clinking against the bowl. “What am I supposed to do? Stare at the wall? Die of boredom?”
You sigh, lifting your mug to your lips. “You’ll be fine. It’s just a few hours. I need to go to class.”
Lando leans forward, his elbows on the table, making no effort to hide his sulking. “You’re abandoning me.” He looks at you with those big, green eyes — slightly glassy from frustration, or maybe just sleepiness. “I thought we were, you know … friends now.”
“We are friends,” you say, setting your mug down with a small clink. “But friends don’t have to be attached at the hip.”
Lando lets out an exaggerated groan, dragging his hands down his face dramatically. “But what if I forget everything again? What if I walk out the door and just — poof — vanish into thin air?”
You narrow your eyes at him, half-amused. “I think you’ll manage to avoid disappearing for three hours.”
Lando drops his head onto the table with a thud. “I might die.”
“Okay, now you’re being ridiculous.”
He peeks up from where his cheek is squished against the table. “Just let me come with you.”
You pause mid-sip, the words hanging in the air. “To … class?”
“Yes.” He sits up straight, suddenly full of life again. “Take me with you. I won’t make a sound. I’ll just sit in the corner and … blend in. Like a plant.”
You arch a brow, incredulous. “You? Blending in?”
He places a hand over his chest, feigning insult. “I can totally blend in.”
You laugh, shaking your head. “I don’t think you’ve blended into anything a day in your life.”
“I’ll prove you wrong,” he declares with a grin, leaning back in his chair. “You won’t even know I’m there.”
You tilt your head, considering it for a moment. The idea is absurd, but it’s not like you haven’t already made enough bad decisions in the past 24 hours. What’s one more?
“You have to promise to be quiet,” you warn, pointing your spoon at him. “No interrupting. No talking to anyone. And definitely no causing a scene.”
Lando raises his hand solemnly, like a kid swearing an oath. “I pinky promise.”
You roll your eyes but extend your pinky anyway. He links his with yours, sealing the deal. His face lights up with the same kind of joy you’d expect from a kid on Christmas morning, and you can’t help but laugh.
“This is the dumbest idea,” you mutter under your breath, grabbing your backpack from the floor.
“You won’t regret it,” Lando says, practically bouncing in his seat.
But as you swing the backpack over your shoulder, something occurs to both of you at the same time.
Lando freezes mid-motion. “Uh … I don’t have any clothes.”
You blink, glancing down at the crumpled sweats he’s wearing — the same ones the hospital gave him. They’re wrinkled, a bit too big, and definitely not suitable for a law class at Columbia.
“Right,” you say slowly, realizing how ridiculous it would look if you showed up with him dressed like … well, that. “You need something better than hospital pajamas.”
Lando looks down at himself, then back at you. “This isn’t exactly suitable for blending in, huh?”
“Nope.” You chew the inside of your cheek, already running through the logistics. “There’s a department store a couple blocks away. If we leave now, we can stop there first.”
Lando grins, clearly pleased with how things are going. “See? Teamwork. This is why you keep me around.”
You scoff. “I didn’t exactly invite you to move in, remember?”
He shrugs, that boyish grin still plastered on his face. “Yet here we are.”
You shake your head, grabbing your keys. “Come on, plant boy. Let’s get you something halfway decent to wear.”
Lando hops up from his chair, looking far too pleased with himself. “I knew you wouldn’t leave me behind.”
***
The lecture hall hums with the quiet shuffle of notebooks, laptops, and tired law students. You’ve managed to slip in just before class starts, dragging Lando along like a reluctant sibling. After the last-minute stop at the clothing store, he’s now wearing a basic hoodie and dark jeans — simple enough to not attract too much attention. Or so you thought.
Lando’s sitting beside you, fidgeting with the cap of a pen. His leg bounces restlessly, and it hasn’t even been five minutes since the professor started his lecture on tort law.
You whisper sharply, “Stop moving.”
“I’m not doing anything,” he mutters back, spinning the pen between his fingers.
“Yes, you are.”
Lando lets out an exaggerated sigh but tries to stay still — at least for a full thirty seconds — before turning his attention back to the professor. As the professor drones on about duty of care, Lando tilts his head, brow furrowing in confusion.
“This guy sounds like he’s making stuff up,” he whispers under his breath.
You shoot him a warning look. “Shh.”
“No, really. What the hell is a reasonable person? Do they just pick some random dude off the street and ask what he’d do?”
You grit your teeth. “That’s not … just be quiet.”
Lando leans closer, clearly ignoring your plea. “You’d be a terrible lawyer if you tried that argument. ‘Your Honor, my client is a reasonable person.’ What even is that?” His accent makes the sarcasm hit a little harder, like he’s personally offended by the entire concept.
You pinch the bridge of your nose. This was a mistake. A huge, colossal mistake.
The professor is still speaking, explaining negligence, when Lando mumbles again, “So, wait — if someone slips on a wet floor, that’s someone else’s fault? Isn’t that just bad luck?”
“Lando-” you hiss through clenched teeth.
But he’s not done. “And what’s the point of signs if people still sue, anyway? I mean, if it says Wet Floor, what more do you want? A song and dance?”
Your face burns as a few students glance over, trying to suppress grins. You’re sinking lower in your seat, arms crossed tightly, praying to somehow blend into the furniture.
“Are you really paying for this?” Lando continues, oblivious to the daggers you’re glaring at him. “Because you should ask for a refund.”
A soft chuckle ripples from somewhere in the back of the room, and that’s the final straw.
The professor — an older man with wire-rimmed glasses and the tired patience of someone who’s been teaching far too long — pauses mid-sentence. He pushes his glasses up his nose and scans the room until his gaze lands squarely on you. And, unfortunately, Lando.
“Is there … something you’d like to share with the class, sir?”
You want to disappear. Melt into the floor. Be swallowed whole by the ground.
Lando, however, perks up like he’s just been invited to a dinner party. “Yeah, actually.” He leans back in his chair, throwing an arm over the back of it like he owns the place. “I just think it’s weird, this whole idea of liability for something that isn’t always in your control.”
A murmur of interest ripples through the class. Some students are amused, others just grateful for a break from the monotony of the lecture.
The professor narrows his eyes. “And you are?”
Lando flashes a charming grin. “Lando. Just visiting.”
The professor’s lips press into a thin line. “Well, Lando, this is a law class, not a debate club.”
“Isn’t law just debating with fancier words, though?” Lando shoots back, and a few students laugh outright.
You feel the blood drain from your face.
“Okay, that’s enough-” you start, but Lando is on a roll now.
“No, seriously. You’re saying someone can sue if they get hurt even if there was a warning? What’s next — someone sues a crack on the sidewalk because they tripped over it?”
More chuckles ripple through the room. The professor’s patience is clearly hanging by a thread. “That’s not exactly how the law works, young man.”
“Then explain it,” Lando challenges, leaning forward. “Because from where I’m sitting, this sounds like people just want excuses to blame someone else.”
The professor looks genuinely exasperated now. “If you’re not enrolled in this course, I’d advise you to refrain from further commentary.”
You shoot a hand out, slapping it firmly over Lando’s mouth before he can respond. His eyes go wide with surprise, muffled sounds of protest buzzing against your palm.
“I am so sorry, Professor,” you blurt, your face burning hotter by the second. “He’s — he’s not a student. I promise this won’t happen again.”
Lando tries to wriggle free, but you keep your hand firmly planted over his mouth as you yank him up by the arm. His chair scrapes loudly against the floor, and a few students snicker as you drag him toward the exit.
The professor clears his throat, adjusting his glasses. “Let’s continue, shall we?”
You pull Lando through the door and into the hallway, your heart pounding with mortification.
“What the hell was that?” You whisper-yell, spinning around to face him the second you’re out of earshot. “I told you to be quiet!”
Lando’s eyes sparkle mischievously above the edge of your hand, and before you can react, he presses his tongue against your palm.
“Ugh!” You recoil in disgust, jerking your hand away. “Did you just-”
“Did you really think you could keep me quiet that easily?” He grins, wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his hoodie.
“That is disgusting!” You rub your hand furiously against your jeans.
Lando chuckles, completely unbothered. “Well, it worked, didn’t it?”
You glare at him, feeling a mix of anger, embarrassment, and the faintest hint of amusement — though you’d die before admitting it.
“You’re impossible,” you mutter, crossing your arms.
Lando shrugs, still grinning. “You knew what you were getting into when you brought me.”
“No, I absolutely did not.” You shake your head, exasperated. “Do you know how much trouble I could’ve gotten in?”
“But you didn’t,” he points out with a cheeky grin. “I saved the class from a really boring lecture. You should be thanking me.”
You let out a frustrated groan, turning on your heel to storm down the hallway. “Come on, we’re leaving.”
Lando jogs to catch up with you, still laughing under his breath. “Don’t be mad. Admit it — you were kind of impressed.”
“I was not impressed,” you say flatly, pushing open the door to the stairwell.
“Maybe a little bit?” He teases, nudging your shoulder.
“Absolutely not.”
“Aw, come on. I thought we made a great team in there.”
You give him a withering look. “I’m seriously reconsidering this whole arrangement.”
But Lando just grins wider, falling into step beside you. “Nah, you love having me around.”
You roll your eyes as the two of you descend the stairs, already dreading the next conversation you’ll have to endure because of this.
Lando hums, clearly pleased with himself. “So … What’s next? Lunch? Another class? Maybe we try philosophy next. I have so many thoughts.”
You shoot him a look that could kill. “Do not push your luck.”
Lando just laughs, utterly unapologetic. And despite yourself, you feel the tiniest tug of a smile at the corner of your mouth.
***
The halal cart on the corner smells like heaven — charred lamb, grilled onions, and the sharp tang of white sauce hanging in the air. There’s already a small line, but you don’t mind. The break from your chaotic morning with Lando is much needed. He’s standing beside you, hands stuffed into his hoodie pockets, rocking on his heels like a restless kid waiting for candy.
“So … this is a New York classic?” Lando asks, glancing skeptically at the handwritten menu taped to the side of the cart.
“Yes,” you say with a little grin. “You’re about to experience lamb over rice with white sauce. It’s practically a rite of passage.”
“Doesn’t sound fancy,” he muses, nose scrunching slightly.
“It’s not. That’s the whole point.”
When it’s your turn, you order two lamb over rices and a couple of sodas, stepping to the side so the next person can order. Lando watches, intrigued as the cart guy flips sizzling meat on the griddle with quick, practiced movements.
“You come here a lot?” Lando asks.
You shrug. “Often enough. Cheap, fast, and good — you can’t beat it.”
He hums thoughtfully, watching the cart guy with curiosity. “And you’re paying for me, huh? You didn’t have to do that.”
“I don’t mind,” you say, handing over cash when the food is ready. The warm, foil-wrapped containers radiate delicious heat against your fingers.
As you hand Lando his food and the two of you walk toward the steps of the Columbia library, he hesitates. “Seriously, I feel bad about it. I should’ve been the one paying.”
You scoff, finding a spot on the wide stone stairs and sitting down. “Yeah, well, you don’t have a wallet. Or, you know, memories. So I think it’s okay.”
He sits beside you, the smell of lamb and garlic wafting between you. “Still.”
You grin, poking your plastic fork into your food. “Tell you what — when your memories come back, you can pay me back. Since you’ve got a McLaren, I’m guessing you can afford it.”
Lando snorts, shaking his head as he unwraps his container. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
The two of you dig into your meals, the bustle of the city alive all around. Horns honk in the distance, pigeons coo at your feet, and students filter in and out of the library behind you. There’s something oddly peaceful about it. For the first time since this whole strange adventure started, things feel … easy.
Lando lets out a small noise of appreciation after a few bites. “Okay, this is actually good.”
“Told you.” You grin smugly, scooping more rice onto your fork. “Halal carts don’t miss.”
Lando points his fork at you. “I stand corrected. You New Yorkers know your street food.”
You laugh, taking a sip of your soda. “Damn right we do.”
For a while, the two of you eat in comfortable silence, watching the city move around you. Lando seems at ease, though every so often, you catch him staring into the distance like he’s trying to grab onto something just out of reach — memories that won’t quite click into place.
“How are you feeling?” You ask gently.
He shrugs, poking at his food with his fork. “I dunno. Fine, I guess. Just … frustrated.”
You nod. “It’ll come back. You just need time.”
Lando presses his lips together, looking down at the lamb and rice like it holds the answers to everything. “It’s weird, though. Like-“ He pauses, trying to find the words. “Like I know there’s something I should remember, but it’s just not there. You know?”
“Yeah,” you say softly. “I get it.”
He exhales, leaning back on his hands, his food momentarily forgotten. “It’s just hard not knowing. Who I am, what I do … where I fit.”
You glance at him, the vulnerability in his expression catching you off guard. For a guy who usually hides behind playful grins and cheeky remarks, it’s rare to see him this open, this honest.
“Hey,” you say, nudging his shoulder with yours. “You’re fitting just fine right here. No pressure to remember anything right now.”
He gives you a small, grateful smile. “Thanks.”
You finish the rest of your food in easy companionship, the city buzzing quietly around you. It feels surprisingly normal — two people sitting on the library steps, eating street food, and talking like old friends.
When the last bite of lamb is gone and the containers are crumpled into a nearby trash bin, you stretch your legs out with a sigh. “So, my classes are done for the day. What do you wanna do now?”
Lando perks up, a glimmer of excitement lighting his face. “Central Park. I’ve always wanted to see it.”
You arch a brow. “Always?”
He shrugs, grinning. “Well, maybe not always. But it sounds cool, right?”
You smile despite yourself. “It’s a big park, Lando. Hope you’ve got good walking shoes.”
Lando glances down at his new sneakers, wiggling his feet experimentally. “I’m ready.”
You laugh, standing and brushing crumbs off your lap. “Alright, let’s do it.”
With that, the two of you head toward the subway, blending into the rhythm of the city — just another pair of people wandering through the streets of New York, trying to figure things out one step at a time.
***
The two of you stand side by side, leaning over the railing at the penguin exhibit in the Central Park Zoo. A group of them waddles awkwardly around their little habitat, sliding on their bellies and plunging into the water with clumsy grace. Lando is completely captivated, his eyes wide and bright as if he’s seeing penguins for the first time.
“Look at that one,” he says, grinning as a particularly rotund penguin flops dramatically into the pool. “That’s me. That one right there.”
You laugh. “I can see the resemblance.”
Lando bumps his shoulder against yours, the cold October air carrying his playful energy. “If I don’t remember anything about myself, maybe I was secretly a penguin enthusiast.”
“Honestly, not the worst thing to be,” you say, smiling. “Could be worse.”
For a while, the two of you fall into an easy rhythm — watching the penguins dive and splash, swapping silly theories about what your hypothetical future careers as zoo employees might look like. The peace is nice, a soft pocket of calm in the buzz of New York.
And then it happens.
“OH MY GOD, it’s Lando Norris!”
The shout comes from somewhere behind you. At first, you don’t think it’s directed at either of you. But when you turn, a small group of teenage girls is staring directly at Lando with wide eyes, their phones already out and recording.
Lando looks at them, blinking in confusion. “Uh … hi?”
The girls rush over, bouncing with excitement. “We can’t believe it! You’re really here! In New York!”
Lando glances at you, bewildered, then back at the girls. “Uh … yeah?”
“Can we take a picture with you?” one of them asks breathlessly, clutching her phone like a lifeline.
Lando hesitates, clearly confused but not wanting to make a scene. “Sure?”
Before you can react, they surround him, taking selfies and giggling like it’s the best day of their lives. Lando flashes an awkward smile for each photo, looking like he’s trying to keep up but not fully understanding what’s happening.
You stand to the side, watching in stunned silence as this bizarre moment unfolds. Lando Norris. Why does that name sound so familiar?
“Thank you so much!” The girls squeal once the photo session ends. One of them waves as they walk away. “Good luck at the race!”
The girls disappear into the crowd, still giggling, leaving Lando standing next to you with a stunned expression. He blinks a couple of times, as if trying to make sense of what just happened.
“Well.” He turns to you, his confusion melting into a crooked grin. “I guess I’m famous.”
You let out a breathless laugh, your mind already working overtime. “Hold on.” Grabbing your phone, you quickly open the browser and type his name.
The results load instantly — articles, social media posts, fan pages. The screen fills with photos of Lando, all of them unmistakably him, usually grinning in front of race cars or holding trophies. There’s even a photo of him standing next to a sleek McLaren, looking impossibly proud.
You turn the screen toward him. “So … apparently, you’re a Formula 1 driver.”
Lando stares at the phone like it’s showing him a ghost. “Formula 1 …”
You scroll further down the page, reading headlines aloud. “‘Lando Norris: McLaren’s Rising Star.’ ‘Lando Norris on Racing, Pressure, and Fame.’ ‘The Young British Driver Taking Formula 1 by Storm.’” You glance at him. “Now the McLaren makes sense.”
Lando rubs the back of his neck, clearly overwhelmed. “I … I don’t remember any of this.”
You bite your lip, piecing things together. “Wait — right after the crash, when you were all out of it, you kept saying you were a race car driver. I thought you were just some rich kid talking nonsense.”
Lando blinks a few times, as if the memory is just out of reach. “I guess I wasn’t.”
The two of you fall into stunned silence, the realization hanging heavy in the air. It’s surreal. One minute, Lando was just some lost guy with no memory, and now — he’s apparently a professional race car driver with fans, fame, and a career you didn’t even know existed.
“This is insane,” you mutter, scrolling through the search results. “How does someone just … forget all of this?”
Lando is quiet beside you, staring at the screen like he’s trying to force the memories to come back through sheer willpower. Then, suddenly, his expression shifts — panic flashing in his eyes. “Wait. What did those girls say? Something about a race?”
You scroll back up to check the news alerts. “Yeah. The United States Grand Prix. It’s happening this weekend.”
Lando’s face pales. “This weekend?”
You nod, your heart starting to race along with his. “Yeah. In Austin.”
Panic settles over him like a weight. “I have a race. In a few days. And I still don’t remember anything.”
You place a hand on his arm, trying to steady him. “Hey, hey — breathe. We’ll figure this out, okay? You don’t have to remember everything right now.”
Lando lets out a shaky breath, running a hand through his hair. “How am I supposed to race if I don’t even remember racing?”
You can see the fear in his eyes, the way he’s gripping the railing like it’s the only thing keeping him upright. He’s not just scared — he’s terrified.
“One thing at a time,” you say gently. “First, we need to contact someone from your team. They’ve probably been looking for you.”
Lando gives a small, panicked laugh. “Great. That’ll be fun to explain — ‘Hi, sorry, I forgot who I was and ended up in New York.’“
You squeeze his arm reassuringly. “They’ll just be glad you’re okay.”
He looks at you, his expression softening slightly. “Thanks. For … you know, everything.”
You offer him a small smile. “Don’t mention it.”
But as the two of you stand there, the enormity of the situation settling between you, you know things are only going to get more complicated from here. Because Lando Norris isn’t just some random guy who lost his memory — he’s a professional athlete with a career that’s still waiting for him.
And somehow, you’ve become a part of the chaos.
***
The McLaren garage in Austin is buzzing like a kicked anthill. Mechanics are running diagnostics on car components, engineers are gathered around laptops, and team managers are huddled over plans, but there’s a thick tension under it all. They’re missing something — or someone — and every minute that passes without word from Lando tightens the knot of stress across the paddock.
In the team’s motorhome, the director of trackside operations, Mark, leans over a table, muttering something about flight records to a colleague. Then his phone buzzes.
“It’s Liz from Woking,” the other man says, reading the caller ID. “Should I-”
“Put it through.” Mark gestures impatiently. “Maybe she’s heard something.”
The line clicks, and Liz’s voice comes through, brisk and professional but with an undertone of hesitation. “Hey, Mark, we just got a call from someone claiming to know where Lando is.”
Mark freezes. Every eye in the room turns toward him. “What do you mean ‘claiming’?”
“They’re saying Lando is with them in New York,” Liz continues. “Should I patch them through to you?”
Mark’s heart jumps. “Do it. Now.”
The seconds feel like hours until there’s a mechanical click, and then-
“Hello?” Your voice crackles over the speaker, sounding cautious but steady. “Is this the McLaren team?”
Mark exchanges a sharp glance with one of the engineers before answering. “Yes. This is Mark, McLaren’s director of trackside operations. Who is this?”
You take a breath, clearly trying to keep your nerves in check. “I, uh, my name’s Y/N. I’m with Lando.”
There’s an audible shift in the room. Mark presses his palm to the table, leaning forward as though proximity to the phone will help him make sense of this. “With Lando? As in — he’s there with you, right now?”
“Yeah,” you say, and then your voice turns muffled for a second, like you’re whispering. “Lando, say hi.”
There’s a beat of silence, then a familiar voice chimes in, unsure but undeniably Lando’s.
“Hi.”
The tension in the room cracks wide open, releasing a mix of shock, disbelief, and relief. One of the engineers mouths, thank God. Mark pinches the bridge of his nose, a rush of adrenaline surging through him.
“Lando,” Mark says, his tone walking a tightrope between frustration and sheer relief, “what the hell is going on? Where have you been?”
“Uh …” Lando’s voice falters slightly. “I think I got into a bit of a … situation.”
“A situation?” Mark repeats, incredulous. “You’ve been missing for almost two days, mate. Do you know how close we were to filing a missing persons report?”
“Yeah, about that …” Lando trails off, and you jump in, clearly sensing he needs a lifeline.
“Look, we’re really sorry,” you say quickly. “He got into a car accident — he’s okay now,” you add hastily, “but it was bad enough that he, well … he doesn’t remember anything.”
The silence on the other end of the line is deafening. Mark’s brain stumbles over the words. “What do you mean, he doesn’t remember anything?”
“Like, nothing,” Lando mutters, his voice low and frustrated. “I woke up with no memory. Didn’t even know my own name until Y/N told me what it was.”
Mark scrubs a hand over his face, trying to piece it all together. This makes no sense. “And you’re in New York right now?”
“Yes,” you confirm. “He crashed his car here. I found him and brought him to the hospital, and now we’re … um … back at my apartment.”
A pause stretches long and thin. The room in Austin feels too small, the weight of the situation pressing down on everyone.
“Jesus Christ,” Mark mutters under his breath. “Okay. Listen carefully. We need your address. Now.”
You hesitate. “Why do you need it?”
“Because we’re sending someone to get him,” Mark says, not bothering to mask the urgency in his voice. “Lando has a race in less than four days. We need to bring him to Austin yesterday.”
There’s a shuffling noise on your end, and when Lando speaks again, his voice carries an edge of panic. “Wait — hold on, Mark. I don’t remember anything. I can’t race if I don’t even know who I am!”
Mark exhales slowly, softening his tone but not his resolve. “We’ll figure that part out, Lando. But right now, you need to get to Austin. The longer you stay where you are, the worse this gets.”
You cut in, sounding skeptical. “What exactly is the plan here? Because right now, it sounds like you’re asking him to show up for a race with no memory of … well, anything. That doesn’t seem safe.”
Mark drums his fingers on the table, frustration simmering just below the surface. “Look, we’ll handle it once he’s here. This is a controlled situation — we’ll have doctors on standby. But we can’t do anything if he’s stuck in New York.”
There’s a pause on the other end of the line, a stretch of silence thick with indecision.
“Lando?” Mark prompts, lowering his voice. “Are you okay with this? Do you trust us?”
Another shuffle on the line. “Yeah … I guess. But, Mark, seriously — what if I can’t do it? What if I screw everything up?”
“You won’t,” Mark says firmly, injecting confidence where Lando is clearly lacking. “We’ve got your back, mate. We’ll take it one step at a time. Just stay put, and we’ll sort the rest.”
Lando exhales audibly, like he’s trying to let go of some of the fear gripping him. “Okay.”
Mark straightens, sensing the conversation wrapping up. “Good. Now, give us the address, and sit tight.”
You’re quiet for a second, and then, after what sounds like a reluctant sigh, you rattle off your address. Mark scribbles it down, then repeats it to confirm.
“Got it,” he says. “Don’t move from that spot. Zak’s already on his way to pick you up.”
There’s an awkward shuffle, and then your voice returns, tinged with disbelief. “Wait — Zak? As in, the CEO? Your boss is coming here personally?”
“Yes,” Mark replies, dead serious. “And I strongly suggest you both be ready when he arrives.”
Lando groans, and you laugh softly, though there’s an undercurrent of nerves in it. “Well, this is officially the weirdest day of my life,” you mutter.
“Welcome to Formula 1,” Mark says dryly.
The call ends with a click, leaving Mark and the rest of the team in Austin scrambling to prepare. Meanwhile, back in New York, Lando leans back on your couch, his head in his hands, looking like a man who just agreed to something without fully understanding what.
You glance at him, arching an eyebrow. “So … Zak Brown is coming to my apartment?”
“Apparently.” Lando drops his hands and gives you a helpless look. “God, I feel like I’m in so much trouble.”
You snort, half-amused, half-terrified for him. “Yeah, you probably are.”
Lando groans again, flopping dramatically onto the cushions. “This is a disaster.”
You pat his knee in mock sympathy. “Better buckle up. Your life’s about to get a whole lot weirder.”
And with that, you both sit in the strange, buzzing silence — caught between the surreal chaos of what’s coming and the quiet, unexpected bond you’ve built in the middle of it.
***
It’s a little past noon when Zak Brown pulls up in a sleek black SUV outside your apartment building. You watch through the window as he steps out, all business — except for the concerned crease in his brow. Even from up here, you can tell he’s walking with purpose, the weight of responsibility heavy on his shoulders.
Lando stands by the door, peeking through the curtains with you, looking nervous. “What if he hates me?” He mutters, running a hand through his unruly curls.
You glance at him, taken aback. “Why would he hate you?”
Lando shrugs, fidgeting. “I don’t know … maybe because I crashed a car, disappeared for three days, and now I can’t even remember who he is?”
You snort softly, nudging him with your elbow. “Well, when you put it like that …”
There’s a knock on the door. Lando jumps a little, and you exchange a glance before you open it.
Zak is standing there, a commanding presence filling the small hallway. His gaze flickers over you for a moment before locking onto Lando. Relief floods his face, and without a word, he strides forward, wrapping Lando in a bear hug that lifts him a few inches off the ground.
“Thank God,” Zak mutters, voice gruff with emotion. “You had us scared half to death, kid.”
Lando stands there, arms awkwardly pinned to his sides, looking like he’s not sure what to do. Finally, he lifts one hand and pats Zak gingerly on the back, his eyes wide as he meets your amused gaze over Zak’s shoulder.
“Uh, hi?” Lando says, voice muffled against Zak’s chest.
Zak pulls back, his hands gripping Lando’s shoulders as he gives him a once-over. “You alright?” His tone is more businesslike now, eyes searching Lando’s face. “You look … fine, considering what we heard.”
Lando grimaces, glancing at you for backup. “I don’t really feel fine, to be honest. I can’t remember anything.”
Zak’s face tightens, but he quickly shifts his attention to you. “I can’t thank you enough for what you’ve done,” he says, his voice warmer now. “If you hadn’t been there … well, I don’t even want to think about it.”
You wave it off, feeling a little awkward under the weight of his gratitude. “It’s no big deal. Really. I just did what anyone would’ve done.”
Zak raises an eyebrow. “I’m not so sure about that. You went above and beyond. We owe you.”
Lando fidgets next to you, his fingers tapping against his leg. “So … what now?”
Zak turns back to him, his expression softening. “Now, we get you back to Austin. You’ve got a race in a couple days, and we need to figure out what we’re dealing with here. Doctors, specialists … we’ll take care of you.”
Lando’s face falls, panic flitting across his features. He glances at you, then back at Zak. “Wait, what? You mean we’re leaving … now?”
Zak nods. “Yeah. We’ve got to get you back to the team as soon as possible.”
Lando looks back at you, his face pale. “But … I don’t want to go alone.”
Zak blinks, clearly not expecting that. “You won’t be alone. The whole team is there.”
Lando shakes his head, his voice tightening with anxiety. “No, I mean … I don’t know anyone. Except …” He trails off, looking at you again.
You meet his gaze, unsure of what he’s asking, and suddenly, you get it.
“No,” you say quickly, raising your hands in surrender. “I can’t — I have classes, and-”
“Can she come with us?” Lando blurts out, cutting you off.
Both you and Zak stare at him, equally surprised.
Zak is the first to recover, blinking as though trying to process the request. “You want her to come with us to Austin?”
Lando nods, his eyes pleading as he turns to you. “Please. I don’t-” He hesitates, swallowing hard. “I don’t want to go by myself. You’re the only person I feel like I know right now.”
You open your mouth to argue, but the words get stuck in your throat. You’ve spent the last couple of days trying to help this guy, thinking he’d recover and everything would go back to normal. But now, with him looking at you like you’re the only thing keeping him grounded, it feels like the ground’s been pulled out from under you instead.
Zak looks at you expectantly. “Well? What do you think?”
You stare at both of them, feeling the weight of the decision pressing down on you. On one hand, this isn’t your problem. Lando has an entire team, an entire life waiting for him in Austin. He doesn’t need you tagging along. But on the other hand … the thought of leaving him now, when he’s so lost and vulnerable, feels wrong. You’ve been his lifeline — whether you wanted to be or not — and something inside you can’t shake the feeling that maybe he still needs you.
You sigh, running a hand through your hair. “I guess I can watch my lectures online …”
Lando’s face lights up, and Zak claps his hands together. “That settles it, then,” he says, already moving toward the door. “Go pack a bag. We’ll head out as soon as you’re ready.”
You stand there for a second, still processing the fact that you just agreed to go to Austin with a guy you barely know, who also happens to be an amnesiac F1 driver. This was not how you saw your week going.
“Are you sure about this?” You ask Lando quietly, once Zak steps outside to make a phone call.
Lando nods, his expression sincere. “Yeah. I don’t know what’s going on, but … I know I feel better when you’re around.”
Your heart stutters at that, a warmth spreading through your chest despite yourself. You nod and turn toward your bedroom, trying not to let him see how much that simple admission has affected you.
“Give me ten minutes,” you say over your shoulder.
Lando watches you disappear into your room, relief clear on his face. “Take your time.”
Ten minutes later, you’re standing at the door with a hastily packed duffel bag slung over your shoulder. Zak reappears, finishing a phone call, and gestures toward the SUV. “Let’s get moving. We’ve got a plane waiting.”
The ride to the airport is mostly quiet, though Lando keeps glancing at you every few minutes, like he’s still making sure you’re real and actually there. You catch him doing it once, and he quickly looks away, pretending to fiddle with his seatbelt.
Zak notices too, but doesn’t say anything, just tapping away on his phone, presumably giving updates to the team in Austin.
When you finally board the private jet, it hits you all over again how surreal this entire situation is. The plush leather seats, the quiet hum of the engine, the fact that you’re flying across the country with a Formula 1 team because their driver has amnesia and apparently needs you to hold his hand through it all. It’s like something out of a weird dream.
Lando sits next to you, his knee bumping yours every so often as the plane takes off. He doesn’t seem to notice, too busy staring out the window, lost in his own thoughts. You wonder what’s going through his head — how it must feel to have your entire life ripped away, every memory and experience erased, leaving you with nothing but confusion and panic.
You’re pulled from your thoughts when Zak leans over the seat, giving you both a small, tight smile. “We’ll be landing in Austin in a few hours. The team’s already been updated on the situation, so we’ll go straight to the hotel and get Lando checked by the doctors.”
Lando nods, but he still looks uneasy. You reach out and give his arm a gentle squeeze, trying to offer some comfort. “We’ll figure it out,” you say quietly.
He glances at you, his expression softening. “Thanks.”
Zak watches the two of you for a moment longer, then leans back, leaving you in a strange, charged silence as the plane continues its journey toward the unknown.
***
The jet lands with a smooth touch on the tarmac at Austin-Bergstrom International Airport, and Zak is already up and moving before the wheels fully stop.
“Alright, let’s get moving,” he says briskly, shooting a glance back at Lando and you. His voice leaves no room for hesitation.
Lando is sitting rigidly in his seat, his fingers anxiously tapping against the armrest. As soon as the cabin door opens and the humid Texas air floods in, Zak gestures for both of you to follow. Lando shoots you a nervous glance before suddenly reaching for your hand, gripping it like a lifeline.
You raise your brows but don’t pull away. “Lando?”
“Don’t let go,” he whispers, his voice tight. “Please.”
The plea is quiet, almost childlike, and something about it tugs at your heart. You give his hand a reassuring squeeze. “I’m right here. Let’s go.”
Zak, halfway down the steps of the jet, turns impatiently. “Come on, you two!”
Lando pulls you along, practically dragging you after him. His steps are uneven, like he can’t decide whether to sprint away from everything or freeze in place. By the time you reach the black SUV waiting on the tarmac, Lando’s breathing is shallow, his grip on your hand almost too tight. You climb into the backseat with him, his knee bouncing anxiously as the driver pulls out toward the city.
When you arrive at the Hilton in downtown Austin, Zak wastes no time, herding you both through the polished lobby and straight to a large conference room on the second floor. The door swings open to reveal what looks like a pop-up medical center.
There are exam tables, diagnostic equipment, and at least half a dozen physicians and specialists, all dressed in clinical whites and branded team gear. The air smells faintly of antiseptic, and the hum of low conversations fills the space. Everyone is focused and efficient — like they’ve done this before, just not with a driver who can’t remember anything.
Lando stops dead in his tracks at the entrance, his hand still gripping yours. His eyes dart around the room, wide and glassy, like a deer in headlights.
Zak claps him on the shoulder. “Right, Lando. They’re just going to check you over, make sure everything is good before the race.”
Lando stares at him. “What race?” His voice is strained, barely above a whisper.
Zak’s smile is tight, his patience visibly thinning. “The Grand Prix. On Sunday. We’ve got three days to get you ready.”
Lando takes a step back, bumping into you. “How … how am I supposed to race?” He stammers, his voice cracking. “I don’t even remember what racing is. How do you expect me to get in a car and drive it? What if I crash? What if I-”
He’s spiraling, and you can feel it. His breathing is coming faster now, his grip on your hand becoming painfully tight.
“Lando,” you whisper, squeezing his hand. “Breathe, okay? Just breathe.”
But it’s like he can’t hear you. His chest rises and falls in shallow, rapid bursts, his other hand gripping the hem of his shirt so tightly his knuckles turn white.
“I can’t do this,” he mutters, shaking his head over and over again. “I don’t even know how to be me. Everyone’s acting like I’m supposed to just jump back into my life, but I-” He cuts off, his throat tightening.
Zak opens his mouth, likely to say something firm and pragmatic, but before he can, the door swings open again, and someone strides in.
“Lando?”
A young man in casual team gear stands at the door, blinking as though he can’t believe what he’s seeing. His brown hair is slightly tousled, and there’s a look of cautious relief in his eyes.
Lando stiffens beside you, his breath catching. He stares at the newcomer, recognition flickering in his eyes — not in the form of memory, but in the way his entire body seems to relax at the sight of him.
“Who-” Lando starts, his voice unsteady.
The young man steps forward, concern written all over his face. “It’s me. Oscar.”
Lando doesn’t move for a moment, frozen in place. Then, slowly, as if something instinctive clicks into place, he takes a step toward the other man.
“Oscar …” he murmurs, testing the name on his tongue.
Oscar closes the distance between them in two quick strides and pulls Lando into a tight, firm hug. And just like that, Lando melts into it. His whole body seems to deflate, the tension draining from his muscles as he leans into Oscar’s embrace.
“Fucking hell, mate,” Oscar mutters against his shoulder, giving him a hard squeeze. “We were all freaking out. You had us worried sick.”
Lando doesn’t say anything, just clings to Oscar like a lifeline, his face buried in the other man’s shoulder. It’s the first time you’ve seen him fully relax since the accident, and it takes you by surprise how much it affects you.
Zak clears his throat, and Oscar finally pulls back, though he keeps a steadying hand on Lando’s shoulder.
Lando wipes at his eyes quickly, like he’s embarrassed to have broken down in front of everyone. “Sorry,” he mutters. “I … I don’t remember you. But you feel … familiar.”
Oscar gives him a small, reassuring smile. “That’s okay. We’ll figure it out, yeah? One step at a time.”
Lando nods, biting his lip, and you can tell he’s trying to keep it together.
Zak claps his hands. “Right, now that we’ve had our reunion, we need to get started. Oscar, you can stick around, but these guys need to run some tests.”
Oscar gives Lando’s shoulder one more squeeze before stepping aside to let the medical team take over. You start to follow, but Lando’s hand shoots out, grabbing yours again.
“Stay,” he whispers, his eyes pleading.
You nod, squeezing his hand. “I’m not going anywhere.”
The next couple of hours are a blur of activity. Lando sits through blood tests, brain scans, vision checks, and reflex tests, all the while clinging to your hand like a lifeline. Every now and then, Oscar cracks a joke or nudges Lando with his elbow, trying to make him smile. And somehow, it works. You can see the flickers of trust between them — something unspoken and unbreakable, even if Lando doesn’t remember it yet.
When the doctors finally wrap up, Zak reappears, looking satisfied with the reports. “You’re good to go, Lando. Rest up tonight. You have free practice tomorrow.”
Lando’s face pales again. “Practice? For the race?”
Zak nods. “Don’t worry, kid. You’ll be fine. It’ll come back to you once you’re in the car.”
Lando looks far from convinced, but Oscar slings an arm around his shoulders. “I’ll be with you the whole time, mate. We’ll take it slow, alright?”
Lando exhales, nodding slowly. “Okay.”
You give his hand one last squeeze before finally letting go, your heart heavy with the knowledge that Lando’s world is slowly pulling him back in — whether he’s ready or not.
***
Friday arrives under the blinding Texas sun, and the paddock at the Circuit of the Americas is alive with the hum of activity. The smell of hot asphalt, rubber, and gasoline fills the air, and everything seems to move at hyperspeed — mechanics adjusting tires, engineers tapping furiously on laptops, and cameras catching every moment of the weekend’s unfolding drama.
In the McLaren garage, Lando stands rooted in place, wide-eyed and tense, staring at the papaya-colored car being prepped for free practice. His race suit feels suffocatingly tight, and every instinct in his body is screaming at him to run.
“Mate, you’ve got this. It’ll come back to you,” Oscar says from beside him, squeezing Lando’s shoulder.
Lando swallows hard, feeling the sweat bead on his brow beneath the weight of his helmet in his hands. He glances at the car and then at Zak, who gives him an encouraging nod. Everyone around him looks so calm — like this is all normal, like this is exactly where he belongs.
But the thing is, he doesn’t remember if this is where he belongs. His stomach churns with fear, twisting tighter with each glance at the sleek machine waiting for him.
“I don’t think I can do this,” Lando mutters, just loud enough for you to hear. His voice is thin, almost lost beneath the noise of the garage. “What if I mess up? What if I crash? What if-”
“Lando.”
He turns, eyes full of panic, and you step closer, careful to keep your voice steady. “Breathe. Just … take a second. You don’t have to think about the race right now. Just the practice. One lap at a time. One corner at a time.”
He clenches his jaw, struggling to keep his composure. “But what if I forget what to do? I still don’t even remember who I am.”
“You’re Lando Norris,” you say firmly. “And I know you’ve got this. Maybe your brain doesn’t remember, but your body does.”
Lando’s lip twitches, caught between a nervous laugh and a scoff. “That’s easy for you to say.”
“Hey.” You nudge his shoulder with yours. “You said it yourself yesterday — racing must mean something to you. Your body knows what to do. You just have to trust it.”
He stares at you for a moment, lips parting slightly like he wants to argue, but something in your expression makes him pause. He takes a deep breath, nodding slowly. “Okay,” he whispers, though it sounds like he’s trying to convince himself.
Just then, one of the mechanics gestures toward the car. “It’s ready, mate. Time to hop in.”
Lando’s hands tremble slightly as he adjusts his helmet under his arm. Zak gives him an encouraging clap on the back, and Oscar leans in close. “I’ll be right there with you during practice. You’re not alone in this, okay?”
Lando nods, though his eyes are still clouded with uncertainty.
The mechanics pull back the steering wheel and lift it out of the cockpit, making room for him to slide in. Lando stares at the narrow seat, frozen for just a second too long, before your voice cuts through the haze of his fear.
“You don’t have to be perfect, Lando. Just be you.”
Something about those words seems to reach him. He sucks in a breath, gives you a tentative nod, and finally, slowly, lowers himself into the cockpit.
And just like that, something shifts.
The moment his body settles into the molded seat, his fingers finding the familiar feel of the wheel, it’s as if a switch is flipped inside him. His shoulders relax slightly, his hands seem to know exactly where to rest, and his feet instinctively press against the pedals like they belong there. He rolls his neck side to side, the movements fluid and natural — like he’s done it a thousand times before.
The mechanics lean in to fasten his harness and replace the wheel, and Lando doesn’t flinch, his attention shifting to the world through the narrow slit of his helmet. His hands tighten around the wheel, and without thinking, he taps one of the buttons to bring up a setting on the dash.
Zak notices the small motion and smiles. “There he is.”
Oscar leans down beside the cockpit and grins. “Told you, mate. It’s muscle memory. You’re already in the zone.”
Lando doesn’t reply, but you can see the faintest flicker of something like relief in his eyes. His breath evens out, and some of the tension in his posture melts away.
You step closer to the side of the car, giving him a thumbs-up. “See? Like riding a bike.”
He turns his head slightly toward you, the corners of his mouth twitching under the helmet. “Except a bike doesn’t go 300 kilometers an hour.”
“Details,” you say with a grin.
One of the engineers taps his headset. “Alright, Lando. Fire it up. We’ll do a systems check before you head out.”
Lando takes a deep breath, then hits the ignition button. The engine roars to life with a deafening growl, vibrating through the air and rattling the walls of the garage. You jump slightly at the sound, but Lando doesn’t even blink. His eyes are locked straight ahead, his grip on the wheel steady.
It’s like watching a different person — the nervous, unsure Lando from earlier fading into the background as something sharper, more focused, takes its place.
The mechanics give a few final nods, signaling everything is good to go. The team radio crackles to life in Lando’s ear.
“Alright, Lando. Systems look good. Let’s roll out and get some laps in. We’ll ease into it.”
Lando’s fingers tap lightly against the wheel, a gesture that feels almost unconscious. He glances over at you one last time, his eyes peeking through the visor.
“You’ve got this,” you tell him, your voice steady and sure. “Just drive.”
For the first time since you met him, Lando’s smile reaches his eyes. It’s small and fleeting, but it’s there — a glimpse of the person buried beneath the fear and confusion.
“Thanks,” he murmurs through the helmet, his voice crackling over the radio.
You step back as the mechanics lower the car off its jacks. The tires touch the ground with a solid thunk, and the sound of the engine revving fills the garage.
“Let’s do this,” Lando says, more to himself than anyone else. And with that, the car rolls forward, smooth and controlled, out of the garage and into the sunlight of the pit lane.
You stand at the edge of the garage, watching as the papaya car disappears around the corner, the roar of the engine fading into the distance. Your heart pounds in your chest, a strange mixture of pride and nerves settling in your stomach.
“He’ll be fine,” Zak says from beside you, watching the car with a knowing smile. “He always is.”
You exhale slowly, still gripping the edge of the garage wall. “I hope so.”
As Lando’s car speeds down the track for the first lap of free practice, a thought strikes you — he might not remember who he is right now, but in this moment, behind the wheel of that car, he’s exactly where he’s meant to be.
And somehow, you know he’ll figure the rest out from there.
***
Saturday arrives with the buzz of excitement hanging thick in the air, the kind that only race weekends can bring. The Texas sun beats down mercilessly on the Circuit of the Americas, and the grandstands are packed, fans waving flags, faces painted with bright colors, and anticipation radiating from the crowd. The tension in the McLaren garage is almost palpable.
Lando sits in the cockpit of his car, visor down, hands relaxed but ready on the steering wheel as Q3 begins. The roar of engines fills the track as the remaining drivers fight for the top starting positions for the sprint race. It’s fast, intense, and unforgiving. There’s no room for hesitation here — only precision and instinct. And for the first time in days, Lando feels like himself again — or at least the closest version of it.
But there’s still a wall in his mind, blocking the memories of who he is beyond this moment, beyond the car. His hands know what to do. His feet know where to place pressure on the pedals. But his brain? It still feels like a stranger.
“Alright, Lando,” his engineer's voice crackles through the radio. “We’ve got time for two more flying laps. Let’s go get it, mate.”
“Copy that,” Lando replies, voice steady.
The tires squeal as he tears down the straight, the roar of the engine vibrating through every bone in his body. He weaves through the first sector like a painter brushing strokes across a canvas, flowing naturally from apex to apex. For those watching, Lando Norris looks like a man on fire — quick, precise, unrelenting. But inside his helmet, he’s still scrambling.
The team radios him updates as he pushes through his first timed lap, green and purple sectors lighting up on his dash. But something still feels off. There’s a pressure building in his chest, like an itch at the back of his mind that refuses to surface.
“Sector 2 looking great, Lando. Keep it together, and we’ve got a chance at pole.”
He doesn’t respond — can’t respond. The itch is growing stronger. A spark flares at the edges of his consciousness, like a door creaking open just a sliver. His grip tightens on the wheel as he flies through the penultimate corner.
And then, it happens.
The door in his mind swings open with the force of a tidal wave, flooding him with memory after memory. It’s overwhelming — flashes of moments, feelings, names, faces. The accident. The ambulance. You.
He remembers everything.
“Holy fuck!” Lando’s voice bursts through the radio, excitement crackling through every word. “I-I remember everything!”
There’s a stunned silence on the other end of the line before his engineer’s voice comes back, laced with disbelief. “Lando? You’re saying-”
“Yeah, yeah — everything!” Lando’s laugh is almost hysterical, pure joy and disbelief pouring out of him. “I know who I am. I know where I am. Oh my god, I can’t believe this!”
“Lando, that’s — well, fantastic, mate!” The engineer’s relief is obvious, but there’s no time to dwell. “Alright, focus. One more corner. Bring it home.”
And just like that, Lando snaps back into race mode. His hands feel lighter on the wheel, his body moves with an ease that’s almost poetic. He barrels down the final straight with precision, pushing the car to its limits.
The crowd erupts as he crosses the finish line.
“P1, Lando! P1!” His engineer shouts, barely able to contain his excitement. “You’ve put it on pole, mate!”
Lando lets out a whoop of joy, thumping the side of the steering wheel. “Let’s go!” He shouts, the exhilaration bubbling over. “Pole position, baby!”
The car rolls back into the pit lane, where the team is already waiting for him, cheering, clapping, and slapping the side of the car in celebration. Lando pulls himself out of the cockpit, yanking off his helmet and balaclava. His curls are a sweaty mess, his face flushed from the heat, but his grin is unstoppable.
He barely has a moment to catch his breath before you come rushing through the crowd toward him.
“You remembered?” You ask breathlessly, searching his face, your own eyes wide with disbelief and relief.
Lando laughs, nodding as he sweeps you into a hug without hesitation. “Yeah, I remembered!” He says, voice muffled into your hair. His arms are tight around you, grounding himself in the moment, as if letting go might make everything disappear again.
You let out a laugh, part relief, part disbelief. “That’s amazing, Lando!”
When he finally pulls back, there’s something softer in his expression — a gratitude so deep it’s hard to put into words. He stares at you for a moment, as if committing every detail of your face to memory.
“I don’t even know where to start,” Lando says, his voice dropping into something more serious, more heartfelt. “I — thank you. For everything.”
You shake your head, trying to wave off his words, but he grabs your hand, holding it tightly between his. “No, seriously. I may have forgotten a lot over the past week, but I’ll never forget you. I mean it.”
His eyes are bright and sincere, and the weight of his words settles warmly between the two of you.
“Well,” you say, trying to lighten the mood, “I guess you’ll have to pay me back now, huh? I did cover your food and clothes.”
Lando throws his head back and laughs — a real, genuine laugh that feels like sunshine after a storm. “Deal. I owe you big time.”
He squeezes your hand one last time before reluctantly letting go, the roar of the crowd still echoing around you. But in this moment, none of that matters.
All that matters is that Lando is back.
***
The McLaren motorhome is quieter than usual as the race weekend winds down. The buzz of victory and podium celebrations has shifted to a more subdued hum. Lando didn’t make the podium this time — P4 after a frustrating five-second penalty. You’re sitting on one of the couches in the corner, sipping a bottle of water while waiting for him to finish his media duties and post-race obligations.
The screen on the wall is playing highlights from the race, showing flashes of the battles on track, the post-race interviews, and the podium celebrations. You glance at it occasionally, but your mind is elsewhere. The last week has been a whirlwind — meeting Lando, the accident, taking him home, the amnesia, his memories flooding back during qualifying. And now, here you are in Austin, at a Formula 1 race, as if you somehow stumbled into an alternate reality.
When Lando finally walks in, his race suit unzipped down to his waist, hair still damp from sweat, he looks a mix of exhausted and relieved. His eyes find you immediately, and he smiles — a real one, not the half-hearted, media-friendly smile you’d seen him wear earlier.
“Hey,” he says, dropping into the seat next to you. “Sorry that took forever.”
“It’s fine,” you shrug, returning the smile. “You’re the one who had to go talk to like fifty people after a penalty.”
Lando groans, leaning his head back against the couch. “Don’t remind me. I could’ve had a podium today.”
“You still did great,” you say sincerely. “Fourth is nothing to be disappointed about, especially with that penalty.”
“Yeah, I guess,” Lando mumbles, but his eyes flicker with something else — like he’s wrestling with his thoughts. He looks away for a second, then glances back at you, opening his mouth like he’s about to say something, but then closes it again.
You watch him for a moment, the silence stretching between you, comfortable but also heavy with something unspoken. Finally, you break it with a soft chuckle. “Well, I guess this is it, huh?”
Lando straightens slightly, turning to look at you, his brows knitting together. “What do you mean?”
“I mean,” you gesture vaguely, “this is where we part ways. You’ve got your life back, and I’ve got … a mountain of reading for law school waiting for me.” You force a small smile, trying to make it lighthearted, but there’s an awkwardness to it.
Lando’s face falls, just for a moment, but it’s enough to make your heart twist. He rubs the back of his neck, looking down at his hands. “Yeah, I guess … I guess so.” He pauses, and when he looks back up, there’s something nervous in his eyes, something hesitant, like he’s not sure if he should say what he’s about to say. “But, uh … I’ve been thinking.”
You raise an eyebrow, waiting for him to continue.
“So, next weekend is the Mexican Grand Prix,” he says slowly, watching your reaction. “And I know you’ve got classes and everything, but …” He trails off, biting his lip, before blurting out, “I’d really love it if you could come.”
You blink, taken aback. “Mexico?”
“Yeah,” Lando says quickly, leaning forward, his hands gesturing as if he’s trying to convince you. “I mean, I’d cover all the travel expenses, of course. And I could get you a paddock pass again so you could hang out in the garage, watch the race from the best spot. It’d be fun.”
You tilt your head, pretending to think it over, though you can already feel your resolve crumbling. “Hmm, I don’t know. I have a lot of lectures to catch up on …”
Lando’s face falls, and he looks genuinely disappointed, his expression bordering on sad. “Oh, right, yeah, of course,” he mumbles, his voice dropping. “I totally get it. You’ve got your school stuff, and I don’t want to-”
“Okay, okay,” you cut him off, laughing softly. “I’ll come.”
His eyes light up immediately. “Wait, really?”
“Yes, really,” you confirm, smiling at his excitement. “I mean, I can watch the lecture recordings online, and it’s not like I get an invitation to a Grand Prix every day.”
Lando’s smile grows, wide and almost boyish in its happiness. “You won’t regret it,” he promises, leaning back with a sigh of relief. “I swear, you’ll have the best time.”
“I’d better,” you tease. “You’re my tour guide, after all.”
Lando chuckles, his body visibly relaxing now that you’ve agreed. “Deal. I’ll make sure you get the full VIP treatment.” He glances at you, then adds with a smirk, “I might even throw in some lunch for good measure.”
You laugh, shaking your head. “You’re really going all out, huh?”
“For you?” Lando grins, nudging you lightly with his shoulder. “Of course.”
There’s a brief pause, the playful banter falling into a comfortable silence again, but this time it’s lighter, easier. Lando looks over at you, his expression softening. “I’m really glad you’re coming, though. It’s been a crazy week, and … I don’t know, it just feels better having you around.”
You glance down, feeling a warmth spread through your chest at his words. “Yeah, it’s been a pretty wild week,” you agree quietly.
Lando shifts closer, his knee brushing against yours. “You’ve kind of become my good luck charm, you know.”
You snort. “Good luck? You didn’t even get a podium today.”
He laughs, throwing his head back. “Alright, alright, but still … I feel like everything’s better when you’re there.”
His voice drops slightly, and you look up, meeting his eyes. There’s a sincerity in his gaze, something deeper than just the playful banter that’s been passing between you. It catches you off guard, and for a second, you don’t know how to respond.
But then Lando breaks the tension with a crooked smile, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “So, what do you say? Ready for another adventure?”
You chuckle, shaking your head in disbelief. “I don’t know how I keep getting roped into these things.”
Lando smirks, standing up and offering his hand to you. “What can I say? I’m irresistible.”
You roll your eyes, but take his hand anyway, letting him pull you to your feet. “I wouldn’t go that far.”
He grins, slinging an arm around your shoulders as you walk out of the motorhome together. “Oh, you totally would.”
***
The Mexican Grand Prix is nothing short of electric. The grandstands of the Autódromo Hermanos Rodríguez are packed with thousands of fans, waving flags, blowing horns, and chanting in unison. The energy in the paddock is unlike anything you’ve seen before, and you can feel it thrumming through your skin as you stand in the McLaren garage, nerves and excitement buzzing through you like static electricity.
Lando had qualified well, putting his car on the front row. And now, after nearly two hours of wheel-to-wheel racing, pit stops, and heart-pounding battles, the chequered flag waves, and Lando wins.
He wins.
The entire team explodes into chaos. Engineers jump from their monitors, hugging each other, cheering, and throwing their hands into the air. Zak claps so hard it sounds like thunder, while others shout and bang on the pit wall. In the garage, you scream, your voice lost in the roar of celebrations, barely able to believe what you’ve just witnessed.
“He did it!” One of the engineers shouts, wrapping you in a quick hug, making you laugh from the sheer joy of it all. The victory feels contagious, like every person in McLaren colors has won alongside Lando.
In parc fermé, the top three cars pull into their designated spots, their engines cooling with a metallic hiss. Lando’s McLaren rolls to a stop in P1, the bright papaya-colored car shimmering under the Mexican sun. As soon as the mechanics signal it’s safe, Lando jumps out, punching the air with both fists, his face stretched into the widest grin you’ve ever seen.
He rips off his helmet and balaclava, his messy curls sticking to his forehead with sweat. You can see the pure, unfiltered elation on his face — he’s won before, but this one feels special. Hard-fought. Hard-earned.
Before you can fully process what’s happening, Lando catches sight of you standing at the edge of the fenced-off area, just outside the celebrating team members. His eyes light up, his grin somehow growing even bigger. And then-
He’s moving toward you.
The crowd, the cameras, the team — all of it fades into the background as Lando beelines straight to you, like you’re the only person in the world he wants to share this moment with. He doesn’t think twice. His arms wrap around you, and before you can say a word, he kisses you.
It’s quick but intense — an explosion of happiness, adrenaline, and pure relief all at once. His lips crash against yours, and for a second, everything stops.
You freeze, wide-eyed, as your brain catches up to what’s happening. Lando Norris — Formula 1 driver who just won the Mexican Grand Prix — is kissing you.
And just as fast as it happened, it’s over.
Lando pulls back abruptly, eyes wide with realization, looking as if he’s just broken every unwritten rule. His face flushes as if he’s mortified, and he stammers, “Oh — oh my God. I’m so sorry. I didn’t — I mean, I wasn’t thinking. I-“
You blink, still stunned, and then — laughter bubbles out of you, light and genuine. You can’t stop it.
“You idiot,” you manage between giggles, shaking your head.
Lando’s face is somewhere between sheepish and panicked, his mouth opening and closing as he tries to find the right words to apologize. But before he can get another word out, you grab the front of his race suit, pull him back toward you, and kiss him again — this time with purpose.
His hands find your waist instinctively, pulling you closer. This kiss is slower, softer, but filled with the same electric energy. Around you, the world erupts — the cameras are flashing, the team is cheering, and the crowd in the stands is losing its mind — but none of it matters.
It’s just you and Lando.
When you finally pull back, both of you breathless, Lando stares at you like he can’t quite believe what just happened. “Does this mean I’m not in trouble?” He asks, a grin tugging at the corners of his mouth.
You laugh, rolling your eyes. “You just won the race, Lando. I think you’re allowed a free pass.”
He leans his forehead against yours, still smiling, his breath coming in short bursts from the exertion of the race and the adrenaline coursing through him. “Best. Weekend. Ever.”
“You’re biased,” you tease, but your heart feels light, like it’s floating somewhere above the grandstands.
“I mean it,” Lando murmurs, his thumb brushing lightly over your waist. “And it’s only the beginning.”
Before you can respond, Zak’s booming voice cuts through the noise. “Hey, lovebirds! Save it for later — we’ve got a podium to attend!”
You both pull apart, faces flushed but smiling. Lando gives you one last look, a mixture of joy, disbelief, and something else — something you can’t quite put your finger on yet. Then, with a wink, he jogs off to be weighed, leaving you standing there, your heart hammering against your ribcage.
And, as you watch him climb onto the top step of the podium, spraying champagne over everyone, you realize that the whirlwind you’ve been caught in with Lando Norris isn’t slowing down anytime soon. And honestly? You’re okay with that.
#f1 imagine#f1#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 fanfiction#f1 x reader#f1 x you#lando norris#ln4#lando norris imagine#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris fic#lando norris fluff#lando norris fanfic#lando norris blurb#f1 fluff#f1 blurb#f1 one shot#f1 x y/n#f1 drabble#f1 fandom#f1blr#f1 x female reader#lando norris x female reader#lando norris x y/n#mclaren#lando norris one shot#lando norris drabble
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Hiii, can I ask for daisy, James Potter, fake dating w “could you please come and get me?” pls🥺
thank you so much, lovely <3 hope you enjoy, and i hope you're having an amazing day :)
🌼 daisy (innocence, loyalty, pure love): pick a character and an AU from the lists above & a prompt from this list and I will write a <500 word drabble
daisy's 500 follower celebration bouquet
James Potter, fake dating, and "could you please come and get me?"
cw: fem!reader, James is not our boyfriend [yet], reader is grabbed by a man she doesn't know
°˖✧✿✧˖°
Your fingers shake as you unlock your phone, fumbling as you try to scroll through your contacts to call James. There are others you could probably call, sure, but your brain doesn’t even consider it. The moment you feel unsafe, your first instinct is always to find James. He’s not your boyfriend, he’s just your friend, but you trust him.
He picks up on the first ring, his tone light and bright. “Hey, baby.”
In any other circumstance, you’d find your heart fluttering at the pet name, but right now you hardly even register it.
“Could you please come and get me?” You ask, hating the way your voice cracks. You’re trying to stay quiet, locked in the bathroom of some unknown home.
“Of course, love. I’m on my way, where are you?” The shift in him is instant, you can already hear him grabbing his keys and leaving his apartment.
“I don’t… know the address. Do you have my location?” Tears begin to well up in your eyes and you will yourself to stay calm until James is here.
“I do, love. I see you.” You can hear his car engine start and the slightest bit of relief flows through you. “I’ll be there in ten minutes. Are you safe, are you okay?”
“I’m okay,” You croak, feeling like you’re too loud and flinch. The music flowing through the house is so loud the floors vibrate, so no one can hear you. But you’re scared. “There’s just… a weird guy who won’t leave me alone.”
James is silent on the other line for a moment, and when he speaks, his voice is lower than you’ve ever heard it. “And you’re safe? You’re sure?”
“Yes,” Every second that passes, you feel a bit lighter. Like you can physically feel James getting closer to you. “I locked myself in the bathroom.”
“Okay, baby, just stay on the phone with me. I’m almost there.”
You think he must speed, he gets there sooner than you expect. He stays on the phone with you until you hear his footsteps approaching the bathroom. He knocks, three times slowly like he always does, and when he speaks, you hear him both through the door and your phone.
“It’s me, love.” You’re on your feet instantly, throwing the door open and jumping into his arms. His smell makes you sag in relief and he hugs you tightly for a second before pulling back to look at you, staying close enough to shield you from other partygoers.
“Let’s get you home, huh?” He asks, and takes your arm to begin leading you to the front door.
You’re slipping through the crowd when a hand grips your wrist, tugging you away from James. You gasp, grasping for James’ hand and he finds it immediately. His expression darkens, especially when he sees the man who grabbed you.
“Where’d you run off to, huh, sugar? I’ve been lookin’ for ya.” The creepy man’s words and sly smirk are directed toward you.
“Hey!” You wouldn’t normally call James intimidating, especially since you know his personality. But right now, eyes fierce and jaw clenched, you don’t envy the man on the other end of his glare. “Back the fuck off, man.”
“Who the fuck are you?” The gross man spits, but James is quick to push you behind him, standing up to his full, towering height.
“I’m her boyfriend. Touch her again, and you’ll find out I’m much more than that.” The other man doesn’t fight. He sends you a dirty look, like somehow all of this is your fault, and scurries off.
James is quick to collect you into his arms. “You alright, my love?” His words are shaking now, and you wonder if he needs the hug just as much as you.
The two of you don’t talk about it again, at least not that night. But you go to sleep thinking about what he’d said.
“I’m her boyfriend.” He’d said, and then, “you alright, my love?”
And even if it isn’t true now, you’re hoping maybe someday it can be.
°˖✧✿✧˖°
© prettydaisygirl
#daisy's 500 follower celebration bouquet#daisy’s writings#james potter#james potter x reader#james potter x fem!reader#james potter au#james potter oneshot#james potter drabble#james potter fanfiction#james potter fic#hp marauders#marauders fic
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Trial and Error (3)

Pairing: Azriel x Reader
Summary: Based on the request: "Azriel with single mom reader? I feel like being a single mom in ACOTAR would be tricky as hell… reader comes from autumn court and flees to night court because she got pregnant out of marriage? 😯 the shame"
Word count: 2k
Warnings: Very small mention of blood
a/n: I am lovinggg writing this and I can't stop so don't ask me to 🏃♀️
Read part one | part two | part four
Main Masterlist ♡
~~
Azriel had been by the apothecary four times since his first visit. That wasn’t an unusual number by any means, but it was alarming that he was supposedly going through his headache tonic so quickly. You would give him a week’s worth and he would return for more within three days.
Melanie had begun to expect him and had taken to examining his wings each time he walked through the door. She would run and stand atop the counter—much to your dismay—and Azriel would unfurl them from his back just a hair so she could get a better look. Her comfortability with him scared you. You’d spoken to your daughter about stranger danger and had emphasized it a million times, but with Azriel, she held no reproach.
Azriel didn’t seem to mind. You had apologized countless times for Melanie’s staring and her invasive questions, but Azriel would only wave you off with a glint in his eye. He always chalked it up to being an uncle, but you’d had an uncle and he was nothing like Azriel.
None of your family was like anyone you’d met in Velaris.
Still, there was a lingering pit in your stomach each time Azriel would ask you a question about yourself or smile at your daughter. It didn’t feel safe to make too many friends, and Azriel was a particularly unsafe friend to have.
The Shadowsinger.
You’d learned of his position within the Night Court’s inner circle after Melanie had asked yet another question about Azriel and his shadows.
“I’m a Shadowsinger,” he had explained, your daughter spinning in circles around him, tugging his shadows along with her. A small smile graced his face as he spoke. “My shadows tell me secrets so I can ensure everything is going okay in Velaris.”
A cold sweat broke out along your skin as he spoke the words, but you only continued to smile and focused on keeping your breath even.
He would be the one to find you out—there was no doubt about it.
But something told you the closeness could be a good thing. Perhaps, if he knew you, he would take pity on you when he found out. Perhaps, if he knew you, he wouldn’t feel the need to dig into your history and ask questions.
At least, that’s what you were hoping for because Azriel didn’t show any sign of staying away from you or Melanie—a truth made even more apparent at Melanie’s open house.
“Melanie does so wonderfully in all her subjects,” her teacher gushed, a clipboard held tightly at her chest. “She especially loved our cooking unit. She loved the burners and heating things up.”
You raised your brows and grinned. “I’m so happy to hear that. She talks about school so often. I’m glad her enthusiasm is reflected in her work.”
An obvious avoidance—an attempt to curtail the subject away from your daughter’s affinity for flames.
Her teacher did not seem put off. “It is! I know she began in the middle of the school year, but she has caught on so quickly. I can tell she has a lot of support at home. Big family?”
Perhaps her teacher wasn’t as oblivious as you had hoped. You fought the twitch in your eye, dreading that this woman would know more about you. Five years of careful isolation and suddenly you were thrust into the public eye.
“No, just the two of us. But my work is quite flexible so she’s never alone. I always have time to help her with school.”
“That’s so great to hear. I have to ask, just for the sake of my student, her father—”
“Hello, Ms. Fern.”
Azriel’s voice startled you out of the panic rising in your chest. You turned to find him rooted in his spot behind you, arms crossed over his chest. His gaze flicked down to you for a brief moment before settling back on the teacher.
“Azriel!” Ms. Fern delighted. “I didn’t expect you today. I saw the High Lord and Lady earlier so I assumed it would just be the parents.”
Azriel hummed. “I wanted to come by and see Nyx’s art. You mentioned he painted the family.”
“You didn’t need to do that! I know you’re so busy. What a wonderful—“
Azriel slowly edged in front of you, hiding you from Ms. Fern’s watchful eye. You felt a slight push against your hip and held in a laugh as Azriel reached behind him and ushered you off without ever looking away from the teacher. You quickly scampered away and made yourself busy examining the art around the room. Upon closer inspection, Nyx had painted a troll—not his family.
It took about 10 minutes of lingering before Azriel joined you, his shadows giving him away. They slinked around your wrists and traveled up to caress your neck.
“Apologies for their familiarity,” Azriel said in place of a greeting. “They seem to have grown comfortable with you.”
“And Melanie,” you added. You rounded a table and meandered out to the hall. Azriel followed. “They love to chase her around the apothecary. Sometimes I wonder if you keep coming by because they’re making you.”
Azriel bit back a smile but it still formed into a bashful expression. “Perhaps that’s why.”
In the hall, you found yourself alone with Azriel—utterly and completely alone. Melanie was with one of your neighbors as the teacher made it clear no students were allowed at the open house, and no one else occupied the space. You leaned your back against the wall and looked up at Azriel, a shyness overtaking you.
You were never really alone with him—Melanie was always right around the corner.
“That was some maneuver earlier,” you commented, fidgeting with your fingers at your waist.
“She was prying,” Azriel replied. You watched the way he carefully trailed his gaze down to your fingers. “I certainly wasn’t going to let her know more about you than I do. Not when I’ve put in far more effort.”
“I thought your shadows were the reason you came,” you teased.
“Right, my shadows.”
You pressed your mouth into a line, feeling small under Azriel’s never-ending gaze. His eyes never left yours as silence blanketed the hall. It was as if he saw through you, understood you in a way that didn’t make sense.
Maybe you could tell him.
No, that was ridiculous.
Was it?
“Where’s Mel?” Azriel asked, startling you out of your internal strife.
The words didn’t comprehend, the jumbled mess of your mind intensifying as the Shadowsinger knocked his head to the side and asked you questions.
“What?”
“Melanie,” he clarified, brows bunching. “I was going to offer to watch her for this but I didn’t want to impose. I know I’m still mostly a stranger, but I don’t know if you have family in the area and I just…”
He trailed off. You never mentioned any family because that was one of the topics you strayed from each time it was broached. Family, your origins, Melanie’s father; he never brought any of it up directly, but he’d hint at it. And you always changed the subject.
“I—I don’t,” you revealed. You broke his gaze and stared down at your fingers, picking at the skin around your nails. “Have family here, I mean. But I have neighbors that Melanie likes. They’re watching her.”
“Do you trust them?” Azriel asked, an edge to his tone.
“Of course I do. I wouldn’t leave her with anyone I didn’t.”
“Good,” he grunted out.
“And I would never ask you to watch Mel. That—I know you’re probably busy and she's kind of a handful..”
Azriel started speaking before the last word left your mouth. “She’s not. And I would never be too busy for that.”
Another silence fell. You picked harder at your nails.
“Azriel, I—“
“I want you to feel safe with me. To trust me.”
His admittance shocked you into silence. You weren’t actually sure what you were going to say to him, but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. Everything you had ever thought exited your brain.
You opened your mouth to speak but no sound escaped.
“I mean—I just mean that I want to be a person you can trust Melanie with. That you can trust to… to share more with. I don’t know what you’ve been though, or how you ended up here in Velaris, but I want to be something safe for you.”
It felt as if something was pressing against your chest. When Melanie was around, he never looked at you with such intensity—he never said these things with so much devotion to back his words.
A sharp, hot feeling pricked your fingers. Azriel’s hand immediately covered both of your own, his warm touch pulling your fingers away from each other. You’d drawn blood—a terrible nervous habit.
With all of the shock you missed the fact that this was the first time Azriel had touched you with such intentionality.
“It’s like you’re living in survival mode—you and Melanie. I want you both to feel like there’s someone looking out for you.”
“Why?” you whispered, the word still sounding entirely too loud. “Why us? Why me?”
Azriel hadn’t removed his hands from yours. He offered a small squeeze to your fingers. “Why not you?”
Something broke in you. Something pulled.
You wanted nothing more than to open your mouth and let everything out. You wanted to trust him—to be able to trust anyone—but there was so much danger to that.
You could be forced back home. You could be forced to marry that man. You could lose Melanie.
But Azriel was looking at you as if he’d place his life before any of those possibilities. His gaze was beseeching, almost desperate, and something was urging you to trust him. Something intrinsic. Something that felt right.
Your lips parted.
“Rhys, I told you, Azriel isn’t here.”
“I saw him leave just after us, darling. He came.”
“He came to Nyx’s open house? What could he possibly have to gain?”
The conversation down the hall startled you. You yanked your hands from Azriel’s grip and whipped your head to the side in anticipation.
Rhys, Azriel, Nyx; you knew who was about to enter the hall, and reality came crashing down on you as soon as you made the connection.
“I have to go,” you rushed out, eyes widening. “I—Thank you, Azriel, but this isn’t—this isn’t safe for Melanie. Not… all of this. I have to—”
You left, and Azriel stayed.
You heard your name as you went, heard it echo down the hall, but you still left.
And Azriel still stayed.
part four
#azriel x reader#azriel x female!reader#azriel x you#azriel x y/n#azriel fanfic#azriel shadowsinger#azriel spymaster#azriel acotar#acotar#acotar fanfiction
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Astarion doesn't ask for affection because he can't..... yet.
Ah, more tea steeping in this seeming endless sea of thoughts. This brew is a bit strong on the heart. Read with caution.
Warning for game spoilers and talk of abuse.
This perspective is from game content only. How anybody cannons their relationships or behaviors is perfectly right. No blame, no shame, it's your game.
I was always miffed at the lack of initiated affection from Astarion as a partner. YOU ask him for a kiss. YOU ask him for a hug. YOU ask him to tell you thank you after being an amazing partner and killing a massive beastie just for him! Brat...
But then I had a sudden realization. Given his past, affection is probably insanely hard to ask for. Like it can be for a lot of us.
Stay awhile and listen. (nerd)
Now when I speak of narcissistic abuse I am only speaking from what I know about it. I have no academic or phycology degree on the matter. Just good ol' tossed in the pond and forced to sink or swim experience.
Astarion spent 200 years under the crushing weight of narcissistic / psychopathic abuse. One of the things these types of abusers love to do is take what you love and make you hate it and then make you hate yourself for ever having liked it to begin with. All very nasty business that. But it's one of the main corner stones for the cage they build to control you.
They make you feel as if the request of a simple hug is the most pathetic thing you could ask for. Or the most selfish thing as it inconveniences them. They don't want it, why should they give it to you?
Shame, belittle, degrade, devalue..
200 years with a master who used him like a tool. 200 years with siblings that fought amongst each other so much comfort was a liability. Nights coming home assaulted only to be mocked for your tears. Insulted for your need of comfort.
"Pathetic! Weak! Disgusting! "
Shame, belittle, degrade, devalue..
Affection was nowhere to be found there, I assure you.
And for a Narc. anything given is expected to be "earned" in any way they see fit. And if you were "rewarded" with anything, it comes at high price.
And how dare you not find it fair. You ingrate!
Shame, belittle, degrade, devalue..
Hugs are pathetic. Kisses are an intrusion. Or they become gateways to other unwanted behaviors. To be held...what are you? A baby? The only way you are going to get held, is down.
Shame, belittle, degrade, devalue.. The pattern continues.
But you ask HIM for a kiss. And he says..
"There is nothing I'd like more."
And he means it.
I'd bet a mountain of gold he wants to just ask you himself. But years of conditioning to expect pain when seeking pleasure probably keeps him in a choke hold. Like rats that are shocked every time they try to eat food out of a dish. They learn it is safer to starve.
"I want to ask Tav for a kiss or a hug, but they might think i'm weak. But if they ask me first then it's them who wants it and they can't degrade me for it because they asked, not me. It's safe then."
"I want to ask Tav for a kiss or hug, but they might reject me for being too needy and shame and berate me for being so selfish or demanding of their time and person. But if they ask they have time and want me to kiss/hug them."
"I want to ask Tav for a kiss or a hug, but my primal brain keeps telling me they might demand more than I want to give in return for it. But if they ask, I have the power of negotiating the outcome."
This leads me to believe he would view sex and affection very differently as well.
Where most find affection safe and nurturing, it's anxiety educing and unsafe. It means there are feelings and if there are feelings there is the risk and fear of rejection or judgment. It's much scarier.
Where most find sex to be connecting and intimate, it's been used so much it's lost any meaning. Something you can do a thousand times over and walk away the second it's done and feel nothing afterward.
This may even be a part of the reason why he wants to stop having sex.
He wants to connect with you in ways denied to him. He wants the experience of being courted, treasured, nurtured. It means so much more to him than sex. It is so much more connecting.
Feeling this way is wretched and lonely. The most basic instinct is to want to seek comfort in the arms of those who love us. But it's broken. The risk is too great.
And it's hard. Because you could be the sweetest most honorable Tav in the whole of Fearun. But after being fed poised apples one too many times, all apples appear poisonous regardless of if is true or not.
I have no doubt that this prickly elf soaks up every second of non sexual affection you give him. And truly is grateful for your patience while he slowly and carefully disarms the safety measures he put in place to survive. The fact that he even allowed you to touch him like that at all was a monumental act of trust. And why not? You are incredible after all.
I'm going to go ask my elf for a kiss now. And then cry in my cup.
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"All of them Goddamn" Saja Boys x Reader Part 2

ill be so honest guys I feel like I butchered the start but oh well! I don't know for sure how long in the actual movie it took for them to defeat them yada yada. But in this AU i'll just say it took like a few months. Anyway, this doesn't have smut in it, IM SORRY BRO OKAY. im lowkey thinking of making a part 3 cuz this shit ended weird ok. ALSO reader is pregnant, if u dont like that LEAVE. its not my fault bro had unsafe smeggs in part 1
also yes im working on my other requests about them, those will be full on smut trust :33333 -
IT had been weeks since our last encounter. And oh boy… I’ve had these terrible headaches, these terrible stomach aches. The many times I’ve had to dip out of rehearsals just to empty my stomach. My energy levels have gone down the drain. I thought about reasons for a very long time, I was perfectly fine before the “Saja Boys” fiasco at the bathhouse, and a week or so after I was fine. But the more I thought about that night the more I realised how irresponsible and lust driven all of us were. Literally all of them splattered my insides white and NONE of us had any kind of protection, oh my fucking god. “What if I'm pregnant. What if im carrying the child of a fucking demon.” I spoke to myself quietly, sitting in my bed, stressing the fuck out. It all made sense, and I honestly wish it didn’t. How am I supposed to bring this up to THEM? How am I supposed to explain my predicament to my bandmates?? To our manager?? I can’t just fucking go up to them like ‘Oh yeah.. By the way, I'M pregnant and the father must be one of the Saja boys. Hell no. We had enough trouble overall with losing our fans day by day to them, and figuring out a song to completely wipe the demons out and strengthen the Honmoon up for good. Wait… If we defeat the saja boys and actually succeed, what about this possible child I might be carrying?? I mean maybe I’m not pregnant- But with everything happening there is a 98% chance I am. If we kill them- my child- or well their child too will forever be fatherless OH GOD what if the baby dies too?? I have to take a test, like badly. “Hey, I'm going out!” I said to the girls after emerging from my room, dressed very casually. “Alright, be safe okay?” Rumi said back, before turning back to her movie.
“Oh! Can you bring back chicken noodles?? I’ve been craving them!” Zoey yelled out from the kitchen. “Will do, bye bye!” “Byeeee!” Mira said, not looking away from her book.
The evening breeze was chilly, the hoodie I wore could only do so much. Feeling the cold sweeping through the tiniest openings. I walked faster, wanting to get to the sweet warmth of the pharmacy, which shouldn’t be too far now. As I finally reached the store, immediately feeling relieved and speed walking to the intimacy section, looking through all the different tests. I kept my hood up, trying to stay as hidden as possible not wanting any scandals to happen.
”Would you like some help?” A kind pharmacist said from next to me, a smile on her face. ”Uhmm… Well, anything that's trustworthy..?” I answered awkwardly.
We had a lovely conversation, she was really easy to talk to. The average auntie, well at least she looked the age… Thankfully she did not recognize me, internally sighing in relief. As I finished shopping and walked out. I was immediately met with the cold and once again began my walk back home.
Though as I was walking it felt like I was being watched, the hairs on the back of my neck rising like I was spiderman. I tried to walk faster, taking different routes but in the end a sudden smoke appeared out of nowhere, scaring the ever living shit out of me. Currently I was in an alley too so his shit truly was not ideal.
”Well well well, look who it is.” A deep voice called out and I immediately recognized it.
”Jinu??!” I said shocked, clutching the bag into my chest.
”And don’t forget about us!” Another voice said and four more men appeared right next to Jinu.
Oh for fucks sake.
”I'm not in the mood.” I scoffed.
Okay well between you and me I was very much in the mood but I also did not want them knowing about my… predicament.
”C'mon doll we all know that’s a lie.” Abby said, walking closer to me, throwing his arm around my shoulders.
”No really, please.. Just let me go.” I sighed, my emotions in overdrive. “What’s the matter?” Mystery asked, seemingly the only one with the social skills to actually pick up on my mood. “It’s nothing, just a bad day.” I quickly said, wanting to get out of this situation before my ‘possible’ secret gets revealed. “Why do you smell so good right now?” Romance spoke up, suddenly appearing right beside me, literally inhaling my scent. “Now that you mention I smell it too.” Baby said, eyeing me up and down. Oh shit, I literally forgot they are demons. Does this basically confirm my suspicions and fears? Can they smell the change in my hormones or some shit? That's lowkey creepy, but whatever. “Just let me go.” I said once again, walking past them. Obviously they wouldn’t let me go that easily, hearing their footsteps behind me. I was seriously fed up. “You’re hiding something aren’t you? Maybe in that bag of yours?” Jinu caught up with me, tilting his head in a mocking way. “Did you pick up some toys to use incase we all met up again?” Abby joked, others giggling with him.
I chose to ignore them, as much as I honestly wanted to get down on the floor and get absolutely ravished by all of them. Getting home and doing this test and then crying my eyes out was much more favorable. Though I don’t think they took me ignoring them very well, the next thing I knew they had stopped in their tracks, making me turn around, their faces rid of any humor or smiles. “Fine if you’re going to act like a brat. Don’t bother crawling back to us begging for more.” Jinu scoffed, all of them agreeing with him. “The entitlement is crazy!! See if i fucking care!” I yelled out, baffled at how these men… No these DEMONS were acting. No other words were exchanged as I turned on my heel and practically ran off, holding in the tears. This is how everything was supposed to go. Obviously they wouldn’t hold any emotional attachment to me, what was I expecting? A nice dinner date in the city's most luxurious 5 star restaurant?? They are demons for fucks sake, their whole thing is to just lure people in and then eat their souls. But why did it hurt so much? It’s not like they actually took advantage of me or anything, I gave them my full consent and was reckless. And now I'm paying the price for one night of pleasure. I thought, staring at the 3 positive tests in my hand. Makeup already ruined, eyeliner mushed around my cheeks, tears still flowing down freely. My emotions were all over the place, It wasn’t on my plans to become a young mother to a fucking half demon baby. Yet despite all of that I couldn’t help but already feel attached. This child was innocent, who am I to blame it for being conceived by my own foolish desires and actions. I had decided, no matter how foolish or bad, I was keeping this baby and that’s final. The next few weeks were awful, between the writing, composing of songs and rehearsals not to mention rivaling against Saja boys. AND struggling with the amazing side effects of pregnancy, thankfully I wasn’t showing yet, so I could still use our performance outfits no matter how flashy or tight they were. Things had been going south though. The Honmoon was weakening due to our lack of progress, demons appearing left and right. Fans leaving and going for Saja boys. They were practically everywhere, we were being overthrown quickly.
“Alright girls! I know everythings all ‘saja’ ‘saja’. But we are going to turn it into ‘Huntrix!’ ‘Huntrix!’ alright?” Bobby said with a smile placing a bunch of posters in front of us at our table. “There’s a bunch of fans outside who literally SLEPT on the sidewalk just to see you. “Happy fans… Happy Honmoon!” We all looked at each other and clicked our pens together, sitting at our fan event table. And so the fans bursted in and so did 5 random… sleeping bag things..? “And who do I owe this to?” Rumi asked with a smile, going to pick up a poster to sign it. “To your biggest fans…” The male said, they all revealed themselves as Saja boys. Oh for FUCKS sake. All of the attendees went crazy yelling out their band name. “Oh Saja boys It’s an honor! Table please!” Bobby said, as they brought a table down for the boys. “Joint meeting??” Half of the people lined up for us moved to the boys table. We looked at each other baffled, Rumi staying silent for a moment before standing up and announcing the boys would be seated with us and the people immediately lined back up. “WHAT?!” All of us whisper yelled.
“We need all the fans we can get…” Rumi said, sitting back down in her seat. I was now forced to sit between Baby and Jinu. Neither of them didn’t seem to pay attention to me, but I could feel glances my way ever so often. Forced to listen to them shamelessly flirting with my bandmates, forced to sit in absolute misery and worst of all.. Forced to suffer my raging hormones, oh god they smelled so good. The fan event started off good, signing posters and albums, having short chats with the fans, doing cute stuff yada yada. I was doing a pretty good job with ignoring the boys, no matter how much I wanted to oogle at them. Jinu made it very clear they don’t want anything to do with me anymore. “Hello! I hope you’re doing alright!” I smiled sweetly at the next fan in front of me, a guy my age I assumed. “Oh my god!! I can’t believe I’m finally meeting you!” He beamed with happiness, taking my hands in his. Oookayy.. could’ve asked for permission first but i’ll let it slide… Happy fans.. Happy Honmoon I reminded myself. “I can’t believe I'm meeting you! Thank you for supporting us!” I smiled back, a little forced. “I’ve been a fan since the first day, you’re my favorite! I love you so much!” He continued, moving closer to me. “I appreciate that!” I cringed internally at how close he was getting. “Would you like me to sign anything?” The fanboy gasped letting go of my hands to dig into his bag, probably for an album. I couldn’t help but notice from the corner of my eye how Jinu had turned his head towards us both, watching the interaction clearly not amused. It was then when I felt a hand land on my thigh, inching ever so closer to my core. My eyes widened for a moment before I calmed myself down, acting normal for the fan. “Please sign my album!” He asked, handing it to me and so I did.
“You’re so amazing!!! Pleaseee marry me!” The guy said, lowkey freaking me out now. This also caught the attention of my bandmates but also all of the Saja Boys. And if looks could kill this fellow would be buried deep within the earth's core. I forced an awkward smile, trying not to yell at this guy, not wanting to scare any of the other fans who might I add also started watching the interaction. “Hahaha- Thank you- umm I’m sorry but-” Before I could continue a hand slammed in front of me, making me flinch. “I think it’s time you move on.” It was Jinu and he was pissed, in fact they all were pissed I could feel the atmosphere changing. Everyone was dead quiet, the guy looked like he would piss his pants at any moment, before quickly snatching the poster and fleeing the whole event. It was pretty fucking awkward after that but it wasn’t long until things seemed to return to normal. “Thank you…” I muttered to Jinu, not sparing a glance. He didn’t reply but he didn’t need to, another squeeze to my thigh was all I needed. Maybe everything was not lost between us after all, maybe he did care, maybe they all did. They just didn’t know how to express themselves… I don’t know, maybe I’m just delusional holding onto the smallest thread of hope. One thing is for sure though, I need to let them know. After the fan event fiasco I was sitting in my dressing room, just staring into the mirror. The frown on my face was evident as a hand rested on my stomach. The thoughts in my head racing, I was so conflicted. Everytime I saw one of the guys I felt weak in my legs, my heart thumped against my chest, and I just felt… weird. Was I really falling in love?
And how would that end huh…
I was suddenly pulled away by my thoughts due to my door opening, in walked all of them. Without an invitation of course!! We just stared at each other without saying a word, the air heavy around us. I don’t know for how long we just stood there in silence, but it felt like our eyes were having the conversation for us entirely.
“Why did you come here.” I asked bluntly.
“To check up on you, are we not allowed to care?” Jinu asked with a frown, hands folded in front of his chest. I let out an amused scoff, looking away from them, gathering my words. “That’s rich coming from you. From all of you.” I said a hint of venom in my tone. “From what I gathered last time we happened to bump into each other you all were only after ONE thing. Sex. It’s very funny suddenly seeing you ‘care’, or being interested in how I'm doing. Hey it’s okay though! It was a really nice one night stand, I can't believe I expected more.” It felt relieving to finally get my feelings out, really it did. “What? Got nothing to say? Because I was right?” I asked, staring at their faces, all of them seemed to avoid eye contact, nervous almost. “It’s.. not that… I just- We’ll we just… The truth is-” Jinu tried but couldn’t get the words out of his mouth. “We all like you!” Baby Saja yelled out. “We didn’t know how to tell you, or how to find you..” Romance continued, scratching the back of his head. “I guess the moment we saw you again.. Asking for that was like.. a way to try and forget..” Abby said, his face red. “We thought you would never like us back.. Since you know… we are demons.” Mystery quietly said Honestly their confession shocked me, you mean there’s actually hope?? They actually have feelings?? No fucking way. It almost brought me to tears, fucking hormones. “I- I’m shocked… Truth is after our ‘thing’ I couldn’t stop thinking about you all…” I mumbled, all of their heads snapped towards me. “It was torture trying to sleep that night…” I giggled quietly, remembering. “You drive us crazy… And today seeing that boy touch you… It made us mad, it's weird.. It feels like an instinct, to protect you from everything and anything…” Jinu said, others agreeing. “I feel like I need to be close to you… at all times, something is pulling me in.” Baby said, walking closer to me. All of them followed, I backed towards the counter where all my makeup was laid. I stared up at them, all of a sudden remembering the last time and immediately felt like my panties had just been dipped into water. “I want to be close to you all too…” I said, eyes never leaving theirs. Suddenly nothing else mattered, all I wanted was to have a taste of them again, to feel them touch me, mark me, claim me. Jinu’s hands landed on my shoulders, he leaned in slowly, our lips connecting in a sweet kiss. It wasn’t messy like before, but instead a passionate one. As we separated he looked me deep in the eyes, his hand caressing my cheek. “I’m sorry about that day.” He said. “It’s okay…” None of us shared another word, but that was okay. Though I still felt terrible, as they all got close to me. I was keeping this secret from them, but I was afraid, so afraid. What would they think? What would everyone think? I didn’t want this moment to end in more unnecessary fighting and drama, I just wanted everyone to be happy. If it meant keeping and going through this by myself I would do it.
Romance pressed his lips against my neck, his teeth just slightly gracing my skin. Baby on my other side, his hand caressing my arm, leaning against me, enjoying the warmth of my skin. Abby took Jinu’s place in front of me, kissing me deeply, pressing himself up against me. Softly moaning into his kiss, playfully fighting his tongue with my own. Mystery had taken Romance's side and was now running his fingers through my hair, kissing my cheek and neck. After a little bit more making out with them and touching each other up we separated, even if we didn’t want to. But time was not on our side, soon the girls would come looking for me and we would be busted big time. “We’ll see each other more right?” I asked hopefully, the fact is I felt myself not wanting to leave their side for even a moment. “Yes, definitely. It hurts us to be away from you darling.” Jinu said. “Let us mark you… be ours forever..” Abby asked, almost desperate. “Please, I need everyone to know you are mine and theirs.” Mystery said, his voice whiny. The rest agreed, and how could I say no to them? Even if my mind tried telling me no. For deep down in my heart I was afraid of all these feelings, what happens if we truly seal the Honmoon up for good? My heart would be broken beyond repair. “Yes.” In a flash their human forms disappeared, replaced by their demon counterparts. I used to loathe them, to hate them but now I feel like I preferred seeing their true selves. I felt even more connected to them. They placed their hands on my chest one by one, each time a mark flashed over my chest, a purple hue traveling along my veins down my arms before disappearing. Each time I felt a surge of emotions, feelings like a piece of their lost souls merged with mine. I'm sure they felt more alive, I could see this light in their eyes I had never seen before. “You are ours now and we.. are yours.” - YEA ILL MAKE A PART 3 MAYBE YEAH (i will)
#saja boys x reader#saja boys#kpop demon hunters#huntrix#jinu x reader#romance x reader#abby x reader#abs x reader#baby saja x reader#baby x reader#mystery x reader
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hit the jackpot | tyler owens x fem!reader



Pairing: Tyler Owens x Fem!Reader Summary: When you text your boyfriend for help after someone makes you and your friends uncomfortable at the bar, Tyler is quick to make sure you're okay. Warnings: Mentions of a guy being creepy, references to alcohol and unsafe driving Word Count: 1.2k A/N: Just a short one! I am gonna start working on a longer one hopefully tomorrow, but I just wrote this one tonight after I had the idea and so here it is! I love this Tyler so much. Enjoy! 💗
Tyler was sitting in front of his computer, going through some of the footage they’d gotten today to start editing it for a video on Youtube when his phone buzzed. Usually he’d ignore it so late at night, especially because he was working, but not tonight.
You were out with your friends, celebrating one of their birthday’s at a bar a few blocks from the house you shared with Tyler. He’d wanted to come along, but no one else was bringing a partner so, regretfully, he’d agreed to stay home – but just one text and he’d be there, either to be the designated driver for you and your friends or any other reason.
He figured, from the time of evening, it would be a text asking him to come and pick you and your friends up, but the second he read the message, his computer was forgotten in front of him and he was standing up and heading to the door before he even finished reading.
There’s some guy here being creepy. Can you come by?
With one hand, he typed out a quick On my way and with the other, he grabbed his car keys. He locked the door behind him, not bothering about grabbing a jacket despite the chill in the air, and jogged the few steps to his truck, parked in the driveway.
Tyler was a safe driver, but that night he drove a little over the speed limit – knowing he shouldn’t but being much more worried about you to care too much – to get to the bar quicker. He pulled up right out the front and was quick to throw the truck in park and jump out, shoving his keys in the pocket of his jeans as he headed towards the door.
It looked busy, people spilling out of the bar onto the street, but Tyler didn’t let that phase him. He pushed through the crowd with ease, his height and the way he held himself almost making the crowd part for him. He paused briefly once he was inside, looking around for you and your friends, and when he spotted you, he didn’t hesitate.
You spotted him getting closer towards you and let out a breath of relief. “Ty, that was so quick,” you said, wrapping an arm around his waist as he reached you. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pressed a kiss to the top of your head.
“Would have been here quicker if I could’ve been, darlin’,” Tyler replied. “Now, where is this creep and what has he been doing?” He gave a quick greeting to your friends, who were standing in a circle, glancing nervously back over their shoulders.
“He’s the one in the brown shirt with the black hair, just there,” you point the man out, trying to be as discreet as possible, not wanting to pull attention to yourself even though you know that nothing is gonna happen now that Tyler is here. “He just won’t leave us alone. We’ve all told him we’re not interested but he won’t take no for an answer.”
You wondered, briefly, if he had actually moved away from you all, as he was stood talking to another person a few people away from you, but then he glanced back and met your eyes and you could see the interest spark on his face again.
Tyler didn’t let the man get very close. He hated to let you go, but he knew you were safe behind him as he moved to put himself between your friends and the man so he couldn’t get any closer to them.
“Hey, ‘scuse me, man, just trying to get past.” The man tried to side-step past Tyler, but he was quick, moving to stand in his way again.
“I think you should leave,” Tyler said.
The man stopped and raised his eyebrows before letting out a laugh. “Who are you to say that to me, man? I’m just trying to have a nice night and talk to some nice ladies, and I’ve been talking to some just over there all night.” He moved, trying to step around Tyler again.
Tyler moved in his path again. “You listen to me,” he started. “Those ladies want nothing to do with you. I’m not a violent man, but if you try and get past me to get to them one more time, I can’t promise you I won’t become one. So, I am telling you to get the hell outta here.”
You watched for a few moments as the man stared Tyler down, worrying that he was going to take a swing at your boyfriend and create drama. The last thing you wanted was for Tyler to get hurt tonight. The night had already taken a turn for the worst.
“You need me to tell you again?” Tyler said in response to the silence.
The man scoffed, threw his hands up in the air and turned on his heel, walking out of the bar. You all watched him as he left, letting out a breath of relief when you saw him leave.
Tyler was quick to come back over to you, wrapping an arm around you again and gently rubbing your arm in an attempt to soothe you. He could tell you were feeling tense – and for good reason. That man was a prick and Tyler was mad he wasn’t here to get rid of him before he made you and your friends so uncomfortable.
“Thank you, Ty,” you leant into his side, giving him a squeeze.
“No need to thank me, darlin’, protecting you and your friends is my job.” He pressed another kiss to the top of your head.
Your friends all thanked him as well, relaxing a bit now that the man was gone.
“That’s not the end to the night I was hoping for,” one of your friends said.
“I know,” you pouted. “I was hoping we’d get another hour or two at least.”
Tyler looked down at you. “Who says your night has to end? You can all come back to ours, y’know,” he suggested. “We have drinks and food. Pretty sure my girl has some stuff in the fridge to whip up a quick cheese board. What do you say?”
All of your friends looked to you, hope in their eyes.
“Ty, are you sure? I know you have some work you need to get done.”
“Course I’m sure, darlin’. I don’t think your night should be ruined by an asshole like that, and I know how excited you were to spend so much time with your friends. I can just drive them all home when you’re done.”
You couldn’t help but smile as you leant up to press your lips to Tyler’s. He smiled into the kiss as he kissed you back.
“Okay, let’s go,” you grinned after you broke away from the kiss. “Party continues at ours!”
Tyler kept an arm wrapped around you as you walked out of the bar. Two of your friends walked ahead of you, leading the way. The third leant in to mutter a quick “I think you won the jackpot with your boyfriend” in your ear. You knew that she was a hundred percent right.
#tyler owens#tyler owens x reader#tyler owens x you#twisters#twisters x you#twisters x reader#twisters fanfiction#tyler owens fanfiction
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⚔️… ( drabble ) never let you leave ! ୨୧ 一 이희승 ՞
⸃ ⸰ ⌁ ヾ
yandere!heeseung・ reader g ・ smut cw ・fingering , manipulation wc ・ 0.8k | click to library
request. y/n & heeseung are on a break from their relationship even though hee opposed SOOO to get her to come back he kindof stalks her & makes her feel unsafe so she asks him to come back & protect her .. . ??
「 ୨୧ authors note 」 im a little rusty with yandere i hope you like it !!!
he was too controlling, he never let you be; always calling when you were out with friends, or out at work — or just in general he was always calling. he did this under the premise of “there are bad people out there” or “im just trying to protect you.” you could take it anymore. so you broke up with him, told him you just needed space.
he didn’t take it well at first; and you expected that. he cried, begged you to stay; he said he couldn’t live without you — that probably would’ve worked in the beginning, but you were tired. “i don’t even feel safe with you anymore heeseung, being with you scares me more than anything now.” and with that you left him.
he left you alone after that; you didn’t even see him anymore, in fact you didn’t see him for almost a month after that. his friends said all he did was stay home and play games, which made you sad, but this was for your happiness, so you couldn’t just back down. “as long as he gets the help he needs i wish him nothing but the best.”
heeseung in fact wasn’t getting the help he desperately needed. in fact he was getting worse, he was dying without you; he felt like he couldn’t breathe because he wasn’t near you — well not as close as he wanted to be.
you began to feel it a month later; you let your guard down, and that’s when you began to feel like you were being watched. you tried to ignore it, but it was hard when it was all the time, even in your apartment. you began to close the blinds. but that didn’t work, you felt like you were exposed in your own house.
“it’s heeseung isn’t it?” you friend said, you shook your head, quick to defend the boy. “no jake said he’s getting help.” what you didn’t know is that heeseung was always one step ahead of you, watching you. waiting for you. he saw your every move; even in your home with the cameras he installed.
you couldn’t take it anymore; you felt like you were going insane and nobody believed you, they thought you were just exhausted from work or something. “you just need sleep.” how could you sleep if you felt like someone was watching you!
you began to think maybe heeseung was right, maybe he was the only one that could protect you. maybe the world was too dangerous for you. which is why you found yourself knocking on his door. “poor baby.” he saw your tired state. “you look so tired.” he smiled to himself as you let yourself in. “i can’t sleep, i can’t go out alone, im scared someone will hurt me.” you rushed to say. “didn’t i tell you that?” he said. “you didn’t listen, now look.”
you wrapped your arms around him, and he wanted to hug you back; but he had to teach you a lesson — don’t ever think about leaving him again. “hee im so tired.” you looked up at him with those eyes. “yeah?” he said. “let’s get you to bed then.”
he guided you back to his room, laying you down on his bed. “please don’t go.” he smiled, laying next to you. “im not.” his hand was resting on your stomach. “i won't go anywhere.” his hands now moving. “you can just stay here with me.” you moaned softly. “heeseung.” he kissed the side of your head. “you don’t even have to go out, i’ll make all the money and spend it on you.” he said cupping your heat. “fuck you’re so wet.”
you couldn’t believe you fell for again, allowing his fingers to explore your insides like before. “you missed me?” you nodded. “use your fucking words.” he growled. “missed the the way i held and protected you.” he said. “the way i fucked you?” his fingers curled, hitting the spot that made you moan. “fuck hee please keep going , i need you.” you cried out. “need you so bad.”
he sped up, your hips following his movements. “you’re mine, everything you do is because i give you permission to.” you’d complain if he wasn’t fucking your open with his fingers. “you understand, you’re mines, your body is mine, your mind is mine?” you were desperate, ready to cum. “fuck yes hee im yours.” you screamed. “i’ll never leave again i promise.”
that was all he needed, before he whispered into your ear. “cum.” and it was like your body was finally at peace, your mind too. “hee.” your breathing was heavy from your orgasm, eyes heavy from your long exhaustion. “shh, go to sleep.” he said. “when you wake up we can handle me okay.” he held you softly in his arms. “im fine holding you just like this.” you slowly drifted off to sleep in what you thought was the safest place at the moment — but you couldn’t be far from wrong.
because you in fact were sleeping right in the arms of the reason you were feeling so unsettled and by time you woke up you wouldn’t be able to do anything about it… you gave yourself to him.
you were his now, all his and was never gonna share you again…
©️LUVYENI
#enhypen ff#enhypen fanfiction#enhypen x female reader#enhypen x reader#enhypen smut#enhypen hard thoughts#enhypen hard hours#lee heeseung x reader#lee heeseung fic#heeseung fic#lee heeseung smut#lee heeseung hard thoughts#lee heeseung hard hours#heeseung hard thoughts
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Birdritch part 2 Yeah, there's a subscription post now...
Danny pulled another sweet potato fry from his bag before refolding the top to keep it warm. He’d finish all the fries before he even got home, he knew that, but that was future him’s problem. Right then being able to munch on the sweet, salty goodness as he took a shortcut through the park was just what he needed. There was something about Robinson park that always settled him.
It was probably because of the park’s wild, otherworldly nature that came from Poison Ivy’s control. It almost felt ghostly in how unreal it was. It was another thing Danny tried not to think too hard on and just enjoyed. It wasn’t that Danny was ignoring the fact that he was half ghost (as he always tried to convince himself), he just wasn’t dwelling on it anymore. Ghosts had consumed his life for so long and he needed a break.
Even before his accident (it was easier to just call it an accident when people asked about his scars), his parent’s obsession controlled their house, family, and lives. He got now that it wasn’t normal to grow up not cooking because the food might eat you. Or because your parents were too busy in the basement lab to remember. His time away from Amity Park in college made Danny realize that Jazz and his childhood had been at best unsafe and at worst negligent.
It had taken Danny a lot of therapy to be able to say those words.
Being honest, Danny still needed a lot of therapy, but there was only so much progress he could make when he couldn’t really explain that he was half dead and had spent the end of his childhood fighting ghosts, the government, and his parents. He was half tempted to try and track down Harley Quinn and see if she was up to taking on a new patient. (Danny was pretty sure that she wouldn’t rat him out to the authorities.)
A vine thrashed suddenly in front of Danny, hitting the sidewalk with a meaty thump.
Danny froze.
Fuck.
His phone was out of power.
He couldn’t check if something was going on in the park.
While Poison Ivy was much more Pamela Isley than rogue these days, as seen by the city just letting her have control of much of the park, she was still temperamental and the right— or wrong— sort of thing could set her and her plants off. (Sometimes the plants went off on their own. Everyone knew not to be a sleaze bag in Robinson park.)
Slowly Danny started to back up.
Several more vines wretched themselves out of the ground around him.
He could hear shouting somewhere off to his left. Out of the corner of his eye he could see movement from the plants that direction.
Alright, not angry at him then.
Danny crept forward slowly, keeping his motions as calm and small as possible. Just because they plants weren’t angry at him it didn’t mean they weren’t a threat to him. His best chance was to stay on the path and head in the direction away from the noise.
And away from the over sized flowers.
Well fuckity fuck.
Most things Poison Ivy could do weren’t really a threat to Danny. He could phase away from vines, after all. But the flowers? The flowers had pollen and pollen was an unknown; one that Danny didn’t want to be known. Sam was rather certain that the pollens could effect Danny in odd and unknown ways due to his half ghost nature.
He had refused to let Sam experiment on him to figure it out. Comparing her fervor to his parent’s helped shut that idea down for good. Danny didn’t regret avoiding being a lab rat, even as he was staring down the ruby red flowers to his right. He still just had to keep his motions as calm and small as possible.
The flowers were only an issue if they let their pollen out.
Danny started to move in as wide of an arc as he could around the flowers.
While they were closed up he was safe.
Danny’s left hand spasmed.
The paper bag of food crinkled.
The flower petals unfurled.
Fuck.
---
AN: I know there are issues, another no read through late night post, but I'm getting my serotonin where I can. Stay delightful, darlings.
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Imagine stalker dodge x bimbo reader

NONSENSE
I wanted to write something about Dodge for a long time now but I can never grasp his character that well imo. Hope this is somehow close to his character, if not don’t blame me.
18+
You didn’t exactly remember when Dodge turned up. He was just there one day, at your side, never mocking you for your soft giggles and starry eyes. You liked that his gaze never lingered on your low cut tops, his eyes never straying to your glossy lips but instead that he was actually listening to you.
He was a great friend and you knew he was a good guy, with no bad intentions.
So when you told him about your worries of thinking that someone was watching you, he was nothing but assertive and protective of you.
“I’m not sure really. It’s just this feeling,” you said, plump bottom lip in a pout. You stared up at him with wide sparkling eyes, manicured nails gripping his bicep.
“One time I even heard his steps behind me, the whole way from the mall to my front door.”
“Did you see someone?” Dodge asked you with a serious look on his face. His jaw twitched every time you’d mentioned your assumed stalker and you felt a slight shiver at the possessive look in his eyes.
You were just friends but it still felt good to have him at your side. Safe.
“No. But I swear he was there,” you huffed. “Sometimes at night I have the feeling…he’s inside.”
Dodge’s body locked up.
Afterwards he’d drive you anywhere you wanted. Going shopping at the mall, picking you up from parties (sometimes even staying at them, never leaving your side).
It was one particular stormy night, that he dropped you back home from a girls night, his car parking in front of your house. The wind was howling particularly viscous tonight, raining hitting the windshield.
“Do you wanna come inside?” You asked.
“I should head home,” Dodge said, his eyes scanning the area around your house.
You sighed and nodded.
“But,” he spoke up again. “I’ll feel better if I take a look around your house.”
Relief flooded your chest at his words. You sprinted through the pouring rain, Dodge tugging you forward by your hand until you made it onto your porch. Your parents were out of town for the night, meaning that you’d be home alone.
Once inside, you slipped out of your wet clothes and into soft pajama shorts—which didn’t really count as shorts but more as underwear—and a cute little top.
Dodge stepped into your pink and bedazzled room. “No ones here.”
“I still feel a little unsafe.” You clutched your arms around yourself, watching the droplets of rain stain his hair darker.
“You can call me anytime you want, I’ll leave my phone on,” he promised you but it didn’t seem enough.
“Would there be any chance that you could stay over?” You blinked your lashes up at him innocently. “I just feel so much safer with you around.”
A strange emotion flickered in his eyes then but reluctantly he nodded. “Sure.”
You fished out some old pants your ex boyfriend left at your place and told him to go change in the bathroom. A few minutes later and you both slipped beneath the covers of your bed.
“Thank you for doing this,” you whispered, staring at his hypnotic eyes in the dark. The storm was still brewing outside, luring you into a sense of comfort with Dodge in your bed.
He was so close you could feel his body warmth and the soft mint of the toothpaste you lent him.
“It’s no problem.”
“You’re really one of the good ones,” you smiled happily and leaned over to drop a quick kiss to his cheek.
Dodge blushed in the dark, his hand finding your waist. “No one will ever hurt you. I promise you that.”
Your heart swelled at his words and you slowly leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. A low grumble rose in his throat as your kiss deepened, his fingers slipping under your cotton shirt.
“Dodge,” you sighed, his knee parting your legs as he gently rolled you onto your back.
“You’re so beautiful like this,” he murmured before he leaned down to kiss you again. His hand kneaded your hip insistently, your hips rocking against his thigh. Your hands found his hair, tugging as his tongue met yours.
He tasted of tooth mint paste and the cigarette he’d smoked at your window only moments ago. The prattling rain was a background noise as Dodge’s hand slipped further beneath your top, the cold tips of his fingers grazing against your nipple. He tugged gently, making you moan into his mouth, back arching off the mattress.
“Dodge,” you whined, hips bucking up again.
“Don’t worry, baby, I’ll look after you,” Dodge said, looking at you with lowered lids. He slowly climbed down your body, tongue licking a wet trail over your top and over your stomach, until he kissed the little bow on your panties. For a moment he pushed his nose against your clothed core, moaning deeply. You shivered, feeling the vibration run through your whole body.
When Dodge started to mouth against your clothed pussy, soft whines started to fall from your lips. Your hands found his hair, tugging and moving his head just the way you liked.
‘Lift your hips,” he murmured and you followed the request without further instruction. Dodge slipped your panties over your legs and you vaguely watched him push the fabric into his jogger pocket but you didn’t really notice as his mouth was on you the next second.
“Oh fuck,” your glossy lips parted as his tongue lapped at you, teeth gently nudging your clit.
Your hips rocked in rhythm with his hot tongue, devouring you like you were his last meal.
“Fuck, taste so good,” Dodge murmured, one of his long fingers slowly easing through your wetness. “Just what I imagined. Knew you were gonna be perfect.”
You barely noticed him humping the mattress in rhythm with his tongue. Finally, he eased two fingers inside you, curling them just how you liked. It was crazy, how he knew exactly what you needed. How he knew that you liked his hand asserting light pressure on your tummy, his tongue moving in the perfect way, fingers curling just like your ex boyfriend did.
“Oh—fuck, Dodge,” you pulled at his hair.
“Gonna cum”? He asked without looking up, fingers fucking you faster.
“Yeah,” you moaned, eyes squeezed shut as the pleasure inside you rose. “Fuck. I’m gonna cum so hard,” you sighed breathlessly as he doubled his efforts, the soft squelching of your wetness and the creaky bed frame mixing into the most erotic sounds you’ve ever heard.
“Then cum f’ me. Let me see that gorgeous face you make when you come,” Dodge encouraged you and only a moment later your walls were squeezing his fingers, fluttering relentlessly as soft, whiney sounds left your lips. Dodge loved the way your mouth parted in ecstasy, mascara streaks running down your flushed cheeks, eyes starry and fucked.
He knew exactly when his touch became too overstimulating and he softly eased his fingers out of you. You watched him slip them inside his mouth, eyes rolling back as he moaned.
You were still a little breathless when he layed back down beside you, pulling you into his arms. He pressed a soft kiss against your temple as he spooned you from behind. You were already drifting off, eyes fluttering shut and blissed out from your orgasm.
“I love you. No one will ever hurt you again.” You barely heard his words and somewhere in the back of your mind there was a voice. Wondering how Dodge knew were your bathroom was, when he had never been in your house before.
#challengers#my writing#reading#smut#dodge mason#dodge mason x reader#dodge mason x you#bimbo reader#panic
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Oh my gosh I love love LOVE your ND reader as an autistic person myself when I find a fic or fics with a neurodivergent reader I cherish them and these my darling are a treasure. Please can you write when she realises that she likes Kyle? Thankyou Thankyou!
Soulmate 141 x ND Reader
You realise you like Kyle too
After a stressful day all you wanted was a slice of that chocolate chip banana bread, you could say it was a craving at this point. Something that was very rare for you.
Heading to your regular coffee shop after work, it was quiet at this time. The inside was all lit up with a golden orange glow from the lights hanging from the ceiling and the sweet vintage lamps littering the tables. It was getting dark outside, you figured you’d probably have to call a taxi soon.
“Oh hi, you’re not here at your normal time.” You looked up from where you had been getting your phone out of the black leather bag hanging on your shoulder.
“Hi Kyle.” You smiled at the man in front of you. Deep soulful brown eyes you could drown yourself in, beautiful chocolate skin that looked so silky and smooth under the orange glow. Holding a broom in his hand you only just noticed how most of the chairs were stacked on the tables. “Oh I’m so sorry it’s probably closing time soon. I’ll just go.”
“No it’s okay,” Kyle rushes out, the tips of his ears burning when he reached out and grabbed your wrist. Quickly he let go as if your skin had burnt him. He cleared his throat with a mumbled apology, “It’s alright, stay. I’ll make your regular.” He gave you a simple smile that had your insides warning up like seeing lights on the tree on Christmas morning.
A small nod, a little hesitant to ask for what you really wanted. Kyle noticed and managed to peel the information from you. “One slice of chocolate chip banana bread coming right up.” He grinned gesturing you towards one of the two empty tables that didn’t have chairs on them.
A few minutes pass of you just watching the outside world through the huge glass windows and Kyle is placing your regular and your craving in front of you on the table. You take a sip, eat a bite and sigh.
“Good?” Kyle asks sounding genuinely interested to know.
“So good.” You say, voice all muffled from the food stuffed in your cheeks. The answer, along with the cutest food pout he’s ever seen, makes Kyle grin. His heart skips a beat, his stomach flutters and his hands become sweaty. Such a reaction you pull from him and you don’t even know. He’s fought and killed men twice his size and yet here you are making him nervous.
Kyle doesn’t sit down, he gives you your space like you like but he can’t stop himself from glancing at you out the corner of his eye. Can’t fight the need to have you in his sights even if it’s a struggle to say no to the voice in his head urging him to take you in his arms.
He’s a strong man, mentally and physically. He can do this, if not for his sake, if not for his team’s sake, then for yours.
The next thirty minutes get away from you both, Kyle is just amazing at making you giggle. He jokes and says silly things that you’re almost certain he doesn’t mean but it’s funny either way.
Plate empty, drink finished and yet you find yourself wanting to stay. Wanting to converse with this lovely man that you spend twenty minutes with every morning. The way his eyes light up when you banter with him, how he grins to himself at your unrelatable awkward jokes.
If you could pick up on social queues maybe you’d actually see how much he likes you but you’re stuck on the realisation he might be number four on your list.
Kyle clears your table and once he’s done he offers you a ride home. It’s dark outside and unsafe are your reasonings for saying yes, definitely not that the gorgeous man in front of you looks like heaven to you.
The drive home is quiet, but a peaceful type of serene you love. The type you daydream about at your desk when things are too loud and overstimulating at work. Kyle can’t wipe the smirk off his face imagining Johnny and Simon’s reactions when he pulls up with you in the passenger seat.
He’s the complete gentleman when he does, opening the car door for you, a warm hand just hovering over the small of your back as he walks you up to the door of your flat building. It’s so sweet and endearing. It’s more than you’ve ever had before, it’s makes you a little light headed or is that just the cologne he’s wearing?
Either way it makes you go stupid, leaning forward with no control and lightly pressing your lips against his cheek. The action makes you jolt back to reality, you jump away from him a hand over your mouth eyes wide in shock. Kyle seems just as shocked, and when he goes to speak you basically shout ‘bye’ in his face before bursting into the building and sprinting up the stairs.
You completely ignore Johnny stood in the doorway of his flat with worried eyes, he asks if you’re okay as you’re unlocking your door but you don’t answer him. Your only goal is getting inside and slamming the door shut, you do it quickly before Johnny can ask more questions.
Johnny, one of the guys you like.
Johnny. Simon. John. And now Kyle. Maybe you should go to therapy? No, probably not best to go down that rabbit hole. Maybe just a week away from them all should set your mind right.
Yes, that should do it.
#nd reader#141 x neurodivergent reader#141 x you#141 x reader#poly 141 x reader#poly!141 x you#poly 141 x you#poly 141 fluff#poly!141 x female reader#poly 141 smut#poly!141 x reader#poly!141#poly 141#141 smut#tf 141 x reader#tf 141 x you#john price x reader#simon riley x reader#johnny mactavish x reader#kyle garrick x reader#kyle garrick x fem!reader#johnny mactavish x female reader#simon riley x female reader#john price x female reader#cod fanfic#poly 141 x female reader#141 x female reader#john price smut#gaz x reader smut#gaz x reader
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