#a batman who is small enough to be football carried by the flash

[toastcryptid]

Coworker was telling me about his justice league height headcanons and i haven’t been able to stop thinking about Short King batman all day

(Below is his original drawing, for reference)

[watchtower-feed]

Detective

Anon: after your last imagine I can't shake college Damian off my mind, can I request one about him and his s/o in college? I don't really have an specific idea but something like walking them to class, studying together, getting each other coffee and just overall taking care of each other. Notes: I didn’t get to cover everything in the request because there are too many scenes and I didn’t wanna turn this into a bullet point fic. Hope you like it though! Words: 2,774

     “No.”

     The girl that approached the table looked forlorn and her friends slowly helped her walk away.

     “Ugh,” Will groans. He’s one of Damian Wayne’s friends and their varsity is currently doing charity work for Gotham Academy. Will took a brilliant idea from the internet where they set up a table offering people to walk them around campus if they feel bullied or generally unsafe.

     “You can’t keep saying no to people, Wayne. That’s not how the charity works.”

     Damian clicked his tongue. “I know exactly how this works, and those girls did not need assistance.”

     “Yeah. In the bedroom, they did,” Mike laughs and tries to fistbump Will who just stares at him until he puts his hands down.

     Damian’s attention is already taken by you. He kicks back his seat to leave.

     “Where are you going now?” Will whines.

     “Helping someone who actually needs it.”

     You’re walking to your next class while looking over your shoulder every now and then. To Damian, they’re simple signals of someone who feels like they’re being followed. So he stands right in front of your path in the middle of the quad where there is a multitude of people around. You almost bump into him but he quickly takes a step back to give you your space. 

     You know him. Everybody on campus knows him. He’s the greatest player the football team has ever had. Too bad he left halfway through his first semester and joined the swim team instead.

     Damian is staring down at you from being almost a foot taller. Then something catches his eye and he looks at someone behind you who quickly hides behind a statue.

     You see a small snarl on the corners of his lips before he starts taking steps around you. You stop him immediately.

     “You can’t--”

     “Why not?” Damian quickly asks.

     “If you-- if you get in a fight again, they’ll kick you off the team.” 

     Damian raises his eyebrows in thought, “That doesn’t sound like much of a loss to me.”

     “Please don’t.” You grip his arm tighter.

     He stares at you, “Why haven’t you reported him?”

     “He-- he hasn’t done anything. He’s smart. He keeps his distance and no one has actually noticed him following me around.”

     “I did.”

     And you want to thank him for that. This whole semester has been a nightmare for you. It started with your survival instincts kicking in, always warning you that you’re in danger. Your gut has never failed you so you listened. But this stalker is so good that he’s hidden himself well from all of your friends. Friends you’ve lost because they deemed you too paranoid and anxious.

     “Come on.” Damian’s voice saves you from your thoughts. “I’ll walk you to your class. Spanish, right?”

     You’re stunned, “How-- how do you know that?”

     He rolls his eyes and then points at your books. “It’s the one on top of your pile. Lucky guess.”

     You suddenly feel assured and laugh a little. “You’re quite the detective.”

     His eyes widen at the comment and he slowly turns back to you. “You have no idea.”

     Damian walks you right up to the door of your classroom. As soon as you thank him, he leaves and heads for his own class. When it’s time for lunch, you’re surprised to find him standing against the wall outside of the room.

     “You’re here.”

     “Do you have another class?” he asks you while his eyes roam the hallways.

     “No, I’m about to have lunch.”

     “Okay. Let’s go.” Without giving you time to respond, he starts walking to the cafeteria and you try to keep up with his strides. 

     So far nobody has paid attention to the two of you. But when Damian carries both of your trays to your table, the staring and the whispers start. There are even some flashes from cameras that almost blind you.

     “Sorry,” he mutters under his breath while concentrating on his food.

     You shake your head as you watch the lines on his brows and the irritation on his face. “It must be hard being a Wayne,” you say.

     He grins at the thought of what it’s like to be a real Wayne beyond what the gossip columns say. “I wouldn’t trade it for anything. It’s all this stupid attention that I hate.”

     “That’s probably why you don’t date, huh?” Damian looks up and stares at you with a raised eyebrow. You quickly wave your hands, “It’s just that-- my friend-- well my old friend-- she asked you out once and you said you’re not interested. We teased her that maybe you’re just not interested in her but--”

     A sudden flash hits the side of your cheeks and Damian is quickly leaving his seat and marching over to another table, the table where your stalker is sitting with a camera pointed at you. You wince at the sight of it. 

     Damian grabs the man’s camera still strapped around his neck. “What? Did you think you could hide your flash among these paparazzi wannabes?” Before he could say anything, Damian takes off the camera and starts flipping through the pictures. 

     “Hey, man! That’s mine!”

     Damian scoffs. “Really? That’s good then. You can get it back from the cops.” Damian turns the camera around and shows the stalker a picture of you in the girl’s shower. His eyes widen and quickly tries to run but Damian grabs him by the collar and slams the side of his head against the table.

     You watch all of this go down from your table. People’s murmurs are louder, trying to figure out what’s going on. When word reaches you that Damian is calling the cops, you feel a new kind of relief wash over you. Suddenly, your shoulders felt lighter and it’s easier to stand up straight.

     Damian stays with you the whole time. Whenever the officers and the stalker’s voices got too loud, your voice would falter and Damian would speak for you, authoritatively holding everyone’s attention. 

     Once the stalker was detained and all evidence tagged, you and Damian walk back to campus.

     “You seem… happy.”

     You didn’t even notice you’re smiling until you touch the upturned corners of your lips. “I feel kind of free… like a bird.”

     Damian snorts to himself, “Yeah.” 

     You mull something in your head and speak your thoughts out loud, “You planned that, didn’t you?” Damian stops walking and he’s looking at you when you turn around. “You knew he wasn’t just following me, and that he wouldn’t pass up the opportunity you created.”

     Damian’s brows furrowed, “I apologize for using you as bait--”

     “No!” you interrupt and hold his hands, “I was just thinking that it’s ingenious. Forget being a detective, you’re almost as good as Batman.”

     Damian smirks. You suddenly see a whole new side of him probably no one on campus has ever seen. A playful one. “Just almost?”

     When you reach the dorms, Damian walks you right up to your door. He takes a quick look inside to make sure you’re roommate is already there. Before you let him leave, thinking this will probably be the last time you’ll be together again, you gather up the courage to hold his arm, stand on your toes, and kiss him on the lips. “Thanks. For everything.”

     Damian gives you a look before he nods and leaves. You watch a small shade of red reach the tips of his ears as you cover your own blush.

     The next day, Damian Wayne is back at the table with his varsity friends. You walk by and only mean to wave at him before your next class. But as soon as he saw you, he shrugs off Mike’s arm from his shoulder and gets up to leave.

     “Dude, no. You’re bailing again?” Will whines.

     “You have more than enough people here. Just message me.”

     Will slumps down in his seat and crosses his arms, “Yeah right. It’s not like any of us has your number.”

     “They don’t look too happy about you leaving,” you tease as he approaches you.

     He shrugs nonchalantly, “They’ll live.” He gives you a long look before he raises an eyebrow in curiosity, “You seem happier today.” You quickly blush and immediately think of the kiss from last night. “You’re thinking about the kiss, aren’t you?”

     You stare at Damian with wide eyes. You wonder if he’s either a real detective or you’re just too obvious. You laugh, “You, too. I mean you’re actually teasing me. Where is the always-reserved Damian Wayne of Gotham Academy and what have you done to him?”

     He smirks and points ahead to the direction of your next classroom, World History. You look down at the top book in your pile and roll your eyes. Definitely the detective. Definitely obvious.

     After class, there’s no Damian standing outside waiting for you. You try not to feel the tiny pang in your chest and walk to your Figure Drawing class. As soon as you walk in, you come face to face with a very naked Damian Wayne.

     When Damian returned to the varsity table, Will had given him punishment for bailing twice in a row and volunteered him to be the model for a class. Damian has absolutely no problems with appearing naked in front of anybody. To him, this was just a chore he had to do to live up to his civilian identity.

     But as soon as he sees you walk in through the door and your eyes roam from his head all the way down to his toes, he grits his teeth. “I’ll kill him.”

     “Y/N, please. You’re already late. Take your seat.”

     Your lecturer’s voice jolts you back to your senses and you quickly take a seat on the far side of the room. It’s one of the most grueling classes you’ve been in since you got to the academy. Damian avoided your eyes the whole time.

     “Y/N, wait for me.”

     Damian calls out while he put on his clothes. You’re already standing by the door and a lot of people had stayed to continue to watch him. When they heard him call out to you, they instantly turn and glare.

     As soon as he reaches you, he puts his arm around your shoulder and you walk out together. You can feel the heavy weight of his arm rest on top of you.

     “Do you have another class?” he asks. You shake your head, still unable to speak to him because you keep seeing him naked inside your head. “Good. Let’s have lunch in the city.”

     Damian takes you to a small diner hidden in a corner between the business district and the Narrows. The lunch rush is already over and you find yourselves in a corner booth.

     “Wow,” you say. “I never expected you to eat at a place like this. You’re more down-to-Earth than I thought.”

     “As opposed to what?”

     “Oh, I don’t know. Being a rich kid? Everything handed to you on a silver platter?”

     “Trust me, Y/N. Nothing was ever handed to me. Everything I have-- everything I am, I worked for.”

     You prop your elbow on the table as you look at the once menacing Damian Wayne. The past two days, you’ve spent with him have completely changed your opinion about him and a little of the ancient Wayne family.

     Speaking of.

     “My family’s here,” Damian mutters as he scoots over until he’s sitting next to you, freeing up his side of the booth. A group of four walks into the diner and start heading for your booth. “Damian!”

     “Good morning, Grayson. Cain.” 

     Two of the four, nod their heads at you. While the shortest boy, who is still taller than you, crosses his arms. “Rude. What about us?”

     Damian doesn’t pay him any attention. You watch as they enter the booth in a single file. 

     “Late night?” Damian asks.

     The one he called Grayson gives a long sigh as he sits next to Damian. “You have no idea. Would’ve been faster if Rob-- Ow!” The tallest of the three elbows him and nudges his head toward you. “Oh, hello there.”

     “Are you on a date?” asks the girl he called Cain, smiling.

     “Yes.”

     “We are?” you ask right away. You tried to keep your voice low but from the way their eyes widen, you know they heard you.

     They look at each other and smirk. “Looks like you forgot to inform your date,” teases the tallest one.

     Damian smirks to himself before replying. “Y/N can’t think straight at the moment. Still a little flustered after seeing me naked.”

     Damian pulls you closer to him to avoid the spray of water from one of his siblings. “We really shouldn’t be letting you loose into society without a harness, Drake.” 

     “It was for figure drawing class,” you chuckle to break the tension, and try to appease their wide eyes with your waving hands. “I’m Y/N by the way. I go to GA, too.”

     “I’m Dick,” one of his siblings reaches around Damian to shake your hand. “These are Cass, Jason, and Tim. We’re Damian’s siblings--”

     “Adopted.”

     Jason looms over the table and grabs Damian’s head to harshly rub his knuckles into his hair. “You don’t have to say that every time, demon.”

     “Todd-- Stop it--”

     Dick tries to pry them apart but ultimately fails and accidentally gets punched by one of Damian’s flailing limbs, making Jason laugh. “You may have gotten bigger, but you’re still a runt!”

     “Not-- as much-- as Drake--”

     Tim, who’s sitting at the outer edge of the booth across from you, apologizes for his brothers with a sigh. “I wish I could tell you that we’re not always like this.”

     You smile at the thought and finally realize why Damian is always so reserved on campus. He’s the youngest of such a big and lively family. Dick and Tim are familiar, too. You’ve seen their faces on the Legacy Wall of the academy. You’ve seen a few pictures of Jason and Cass, too but not as much.

     This is what Damian meant when he said he’s worked hard for everything in his life. It must be hard living behind so many giant shadows.

     When Cass finally intervenes and disentangles the boys, you place your hand over Damian’s as he sits back down. He turns to you and you give him a supportive smile.

     He smirks and raises an eyebrow, “You keep getting into a better mood each time I look at you.”

     You blush a little because who would ever expect someone to just say things like that. “Maybe your company just does that to me,” you tease back.

     You hear a quick snicker from Dick and both of you turn to him. He’s visibly whispering to Cass but it’s audible enough for you to hear. “They’readorable.”

     After that, Damian never took you back to the diner again, not wanting to let his siblings see the two of you together. But on campus, you are almost always together.

     “Stop! Stop!” you laugh and try to protect yourself from the whirlwind of water Damian is sending your way as he shakes his head. He had just finished training and met up with you at the stands where you’ve been studying while waiting.

     Damian leans down and kisses you on the lips. Your eyes widen before they slowly close as you let him lead. You hear catcalls from his teammates and you can already guess that Damian’s flipping them off.

     “Okay. Come here.” You break the kiss and pull down the towel he had draped around his shoulders. You use it to properly rub his head and dry off his hair. “You must be tired. That ran longer than usual.”

     Damian tries to look at you as you keep drying his hair, “Competition’s next week so we’re doing last-minute checks on everyone’s forms. Did you wait long?”

     You nod your head like a child. “Been here since morning. It’s so hard to date a varsity,” you groan.

     Damian takes the towel from you and rubs your face with it. “Think that’s hard? Try dating a vigilante.”

     You giggle as you try to fight Damian for the towel, “I wouldn’t mind that. Batman seems to be getting hotter these days.”

     You’re only teasing him and he knows it. But you don’t know that the mantle of Batman has been passed down to him. So he laughs out loud and it’s one of those rarest moments you want to treasure but you also can’t resist the urge to just kiss this happy and carefree version of Damian Wayne. 

[prettyyoungandbored]

Becoming Mrs. Wayne [The Dark Knight] Two

Pairing: Christian Bale!Bruce Wayne x OC

Summary: Demetria Gallagher knew her cozy life would change the second she became engaged to Bruce Wayne. But what she doesn’t know is she’s getting more than what she agreed to. (I am trash at summaries.) 

Taglist: @dragonballluver 

Warning: Semi-smut, dirty talking, etc.

Previous chapter 

Demetria removed her coat, throwing it over her arm as Bruce spoke to the host. She could feel the eyes of other patrons glancing over at her as they leaned over to whisper to one another. She flashed a small smile, hoping they’d get the hint that either a.) she was well aware of their staring and felt deeply uncomfortable by it or b.) she was just waiting for her fiancé to finish up talking so they could sit and eat. 

She then felt Bruce take her hand, her eyes shifting to him. 

“Shouldn’t we wait for the host?” she asked. 

“They know where we’ll be.” 

He led her through the restaurant, eyes of other patrons following their every move. Demetria pulled back her lips as she quickened her pace a bit to walk by her fiancé’s side. 

“Rachel, fancy that.” 

Demetria looked over to find Rachel and Harvey sitting at a table. Her eyes lit up at the sight of Harvey.

“Yeah Bruce,” Rachel responded ever so cooly. “Fancy that.” She stood up and hugged Demetria. “Good to see you as always.”

“You too and I love this dress,” Demetria said, taking a step back to admire it. She then turned to Harvey.  “I see you changed your shirt after your soy sauce debacle.” She turned to Rachel. “I tell him several times not to open the damn packet with his teeth--.” 

“He doesn’t listen,” Rachel finished, nodding her head. She turned to Bruce. “Bruce, this is Harvey Dent.” 

Harvey got up and shook Bruce’s hand. “Pleasure to meet you.” 

“You as well. I’ve heard a lot about you from Rachel and Demetria.” 

“Demetria’s told me a lot about you.” 

“Well I certainly hope not everything,”Bruce laughed. “What do you say we push some tables together?” 

“I don’t know if they’ll let us,” Harvey responded.

“Oh they should,” Bruce assured, motioning to the waiter. “I own the place.”

Demetria whipped her head. “You own what now?” 

Bruce smirked at her. “I told you it was a surprise.” 

After the waiters moved the tables together, Bruce took the seat next to Rachel while Demetria took the seat beside Harvey.

“So Demetria, Harvey introduced me to your mom over the phone,” Rachel spoke up. “She sounds like she’s over the moon about the engagement.” 

Demetria nodded. “She’s flooding my emails with ideas for the wedding decor when we haven’t even set a date.” 

“Bruce, have you met Olivia?” Harvey brought up, taking a sip of water. 

“I did,” Bruce nodded. “When she came up to the city for the weekend a few months back.” 

“How’d you guys manage that?” Harvey asked Demetria. 

“We had dinner at my place,” Demetria answered. 

“Oh, you mean you ordered take out?” 

Demetria shot Harvey a glare. “It was from a nice restaurant.” 

He smirked. “I’m sure she had a lot to say about it.” 

“She actually loved it.” 

“What did she think of Gotham City?” Rachel asked. 

“She has her reservations, but really she’s just nervous because of all the crimes and whatnot. She keeps asking me if this is a place I wanna raise kids in.” 

“Well I was raised here and I turned out ok,” Bruce remarked.

Demetria smiled at him, patting his leg with her hand. 

“Is Wayne Manor in the city limits?” Harvey questioned. 

Bruce let out a wry laugh. “The Palisades? Sure. You know, as our new DA, you might want to figure out where your jurisdiction ends.” 

Harvey sat back in his chair as Demetria, uncomfortable at the scene that was playing out in front of her, changed the subject. “If anything, she’s just weirded out by Batman and how, as she puts it, Gotham City looks up to a guy in a mask.” 

“Gotham City is proud of an ordinary citizen standing up for what’s right,” Harvey defended. 

“But who appointed the Batman,” Bruce joked. 

“We did,” Harvey answered. “All of us who stood by and let scum take control of our city. When their enemies were at the gates, the Romans would suspend democracy and appoint one man to protect the city and it wasn’t considered an honor, it was considered a public service.” 

Rachel leaned toward him. “Harvey, the last man that they appointed to protect the republic was named Caesar and he never gave up his power.” 

“Ok fine. You either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.” 

“I actually find him fascinating,” Demetria spoke up.

“What do you mean?” Harvey questioned.

“Think about it, most people who do heroic things do it because deep down, they secretly want to feel good about themselves, right?  Everyone wants to achieve some sort of glory, even if they don’t want to admit. Here comes this guy who’s actually going out and making some sort of a difference, and he's doing it without giving out who he really is.” 

“Well he’s giving some sort of an identity,” Bruce corrected. “He just works under a different name.” 

“But still, it’s someone who is actually going out there and is taking care of the problem without abusing their power like most police officers do,” Demetria went on. “He doesn’t even give any kind of hint to who he is. He could be anybody. I mean, even Harvey, you could...” She paused, before waving her hand. “Actually, you couldn’t be the Batman. You got your ass beat in intramural football in college too many times.” 

Rachel nearly choked on her drink, excusing herself as she tried to fight back laughter. Bruce smirked, eyes down on the ground. 

Harvey tilted his head. “Hey, while we’re on the topic of embarrassing college memories, remember the time I walked in on you and that guy from Student Government at that party senior year?” 

Demetria’s eyes widened while Bruce lifted his head up, intrigued. “I’d like to hear more about that.” 

“It was a one time thing,” she said, clenching her teeth.

“Look, whoever the Batman is he doesn’t want to do this for the rest of his life,” Harvey continued. “How could he? Batman is looking for someone to take up his mantle.”

“And you think that person could be you?” Demetria asked. 

He shrugged. “If I’m up to it.” 

She folded her arms across her chest. “Do you honestly think Batman is gonna come up to you and say, ‘Hey, I don’t wanna do this anymore so can you handle this?’” 

“Not like that no.” 

“Then how the hell do you know what he wants?” 

“At the end of the day, no one wants the sole responsibility of carrying the safety of the entire city on their shoulder.” 

“Except you, and to be fair, that’s what makes you a great District Attorney.”

Harvey and Demetria exchanged smiles. “That’s the nicest thing you’ve said to me all night, Dem.” 

She shrugged her shoulders. “I have my moments.” 

“Well I’m sold, Dent,” Bruce chimed in. “I’m gonna throw you a fundraiser.” 

Demetria whipped her head to Bruce. “You’re what?” 

“That’s nice of you, Bruce,” Harvey chuckled. “But I’m not up for reelection for three years.” 

Bruce shook his head. “No, you don’t understand. One fundraiser with my pals, you’ll never need another cent.” 

“It’s a kind gesture-.” 

“You can also think of it as a thank you for bringing my future wife to Gotham,” Bruce cut him off, looking to Demetria. “Without your persistence, I wouldn’t have found her.” 

She smiled as he took her hand in hers. 

“I guess I can’t say no then,” Harvey remarked. 

_________________________________________________________________

Back at the penthouse, Bruce undid his tie as Demetria sat on the edge of the bed kicking off her heels.

“So, you’re really gonna throw a fundraiser for Harvey?” she asked. 

He looked over his shoulder at her. “Yeah. Why?”

 “Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s great you support him and the offer is so generous but...I mean, you just met the guy.” 

“I think he deserves one,” he shrugged.   

“But why now? Like he said, he’s not up for re-election for another three years.”

He put his tie in the drawer. “I think he’s what the city needs so why not garner future votes to keep him in office?” He turned to her. “Besides, it gives me an excuse to show off my gorgeous fiancé.”   

Demetria blushed as she tried reaching for the zipper on the back of her dress, struggling to latch on to the zipper. “Well, I’m sure your support will really...” She grunted. “Can you please help me?” 

Bruce went over to her and slowly zipped down the back. Demetria inhaled sharply, the cool breeze slowly hitting her bare back.

She glanced over her shoulder, a small smile on her lips. “Thank you.” 

When she went to step away, Bruce quickly grabbed her and tossed her on the bed, before climbing on top of her.

“Jesus, you could warn me next time,” Demetria giggled. “Not all of us spend our nights training like you do.” 

“But it’s so much more fun to surprise you.” 

His lips hovered over hers as she cupped his cheek with the palm of her hand.

“Tell me, did the guy from Student Government turn you on like I do?” Bruce whispered.”

“Oh my god,” she groaned, her cheeks flushing. She threw her hands over her face. “I’m gonna kill Harvey for telling you that.” 

Bruce moved his lips to her neck. “You didn’t answer my question.”

Demetria lifted her head up, removing her hands from her face. “I don’t remember! It was years ago!”

“I bet he didn’t make you cum like I do.” 

She made a face, pretending to think about it. “Well now that you bring it up, I think he did.” 

Bruce pulled back, fighting the playful smile on his lips “Wow.” 

She pointed a finger at him. “You started it!” 

“So that’s how we’re gonna do this..” 

“Are you going to fuck me or not because I don’t remember him taking this long to-.” 

Bruce shut her up by crashing his lip onto hers. He made damn sure she was gonna scream his name loud enough for the kid from Student Government to hear wherever he was.

_____________________________________________________________

She woke up to find herself alone in bed, curled up on her side as the sating sheets wrapped tightly around her nude body. She sighed and laid on her back, knowing Bruce was probably training at the gym.

As much as she loved him and was proud of him for being so dedicated, she wished some nights she could wake up and find him still there, still holding her. She wanted to see the way the moonlight reflected off his body as they went off in one of their deep talks.

But he was dedicated to what he did and she respected that. 

She grabbed her glass of water from the nightstand to find it empty. Tossing, the sheets off her, she made her way to the set of drawers Bruce bought for her and grabbed a pair of black yoga shorts and her old Gotham University hoodie. 

She then walked into the kitchen area and quietly filled her cup with water from the kitchen sink. Turning off the water after filling up, she took a quick sip before looking over her shoulder at the twinkling lights from other building lights. 

She wandered outside, gently closing the door behind her. Setting her glass on the ledge, she leaned over the railing and gazed as the city in front of her. 

While she never cared about Bruce luxurious lifestyle, she did love how his balcony had the best view of the city. She could get used to spending some quiet nights out here.

It was a fact that Gotham was its most dangerous during the nighttime, which Demetria found to be waste because in the right light, like the one she was currently looking at, the city could be absolutely breath taking at night. 

“You should be inside.”

She jumped, her arm flinging and knocking over the glass of water on the ground. 

“Fuck me,” she whispered. She then turned to her side to find Batman standing there. Her mouth hung open a jar, as she took in the sight before her. “Wow...”

“What?” His voice was rough, calloused, and almost hushed. 

“You’re just...bigger than I thought.” She folded her arms across her chest. “You’re also a lot more intimidating in person.” 

“I scare you?” 

She chuckled nervously. “Well, considering you show up and beat the shit out of people, I mean yeah. You are.” 

Silence fell as she waited for him to respond. “So are you gonna beat me up or...?” she joked, half-heartedly. 

Once again, no response. Her smile fell as she nodded her head awkwardly. “You’re not much for conversations, are you?” 

He didn’t respond, again. She pulled back her lips. “Well then, I’m going to get a broom and clean up the glass.” 

She went to turn around when she heard, “You’re the billionaire’s wife.” 

She turned to face him. “He has a name and so do I.” She paused. “Also, I’m his fiancé.” 

“But you’re going to be his wife.” 

“If you don’t kill me tonight, then yeah.” 

He made one step toward, causing her heart to drop to her stomach. She took a couple steps back. 

“I won’t hurt you,” he told her. 

“Then can you tell me why you’re here so I can go about my life and you can go take out some member of the mafia?” 

“Your life is valuable. Stay inside.” 

He then grabbed the railing and jumped off, Demetria leaning over to watch him soar off into the night. 

Running her hand through her hair, she let out a long sigh. “Jesus fucking christ.” 

She went inside and quietly went back inside to grab a broom and the garbage can. 

She cleaned up the glass, throwing the pieces in the garbage can. Putting the broom back in the kitchen closet and the garbage can away, she went back into the bedroom and closed the door. She turned on her bedside lamp and grabbed the remote, turning on the TV, settling on an old episode of “I Love Lucy.” 

_________________________________________________________

Bruce entered the apartment quietly, as though not to wake anyone. He quickly glanced over to find Demetria was no longer out on the balcony, a small wave of relief crashing over him. 

He’d made a promise to himself to keep Demetria away from Batman as best as he could; however, between the constant coverage the press was giving her and the copycats and the mob and their affiliates running around at night, he had to do what he could to protect her. 

He entered their bedroom to find the TV on and Demetria lying awake in bed. 

“What’re you doing up?” he asked, laying his gym bag on the floor. 

She pulled her knees to her chest. “If I told you, you’d think I was crazy.” 

He got into the bed and wrapped an arm around her. “Try me.” 

She sighed. “I met Batman.” 

He furrowed his eyebrows. “Really?”

“I was out on the balcony and he just showed up and, I don’t know, he just...he was strange.” 

“He didn’t hurt you, did he?” 

 “No, no, no. He just told me I should stay inside because I’m apparently valuable.” She leaned her head against Bruce’s chest and sighed. “God, this city’s so fucking weird.” 

He chuckled. “It’s not all that bad.”

Her fingers gingerly ran through his hair lazily. “How was your workout? Any more injuries?” 

“It was fine and no, not a scratch on me.” 

“And last night’s scratches? They’re ok?” 

“Perfectly so.” His smile softened. “Thank you.” 

“For what?”  “For being you. For taking care of me.” 

She smiled. “Happy to help.”

“What would I do without you?”

She lifted her head up. “Fuck half the Moscow ballet?”

Bruce shook his head, laughter escaping his lips. “I love you, Demetria.”

“I love you too, Bruce.”

He kissed her forehead before turning his eyes to the TV. “ ‘I Love Lucy’?” 

“I couldn’t go back to sleep.” 

She reached over for the remote on the bed when Bruce grabbed it first. He turned up the volume a bit, pulling Demetria closer to him. She threw one arm over him as they watched the show together.

Bruce knew his days as Batman would eventually end and when they did, he couldn’t wait to spend a normal night curled up with his wife watching a mindless show. 

Those days were coming soon, at he least hoped they would. 

[kassofchaos]

Welcome to Gotham

When youngster hero Ben Tennyson finds himself in Gotham city, all seems to be going well. Gotham is soon to leave its impression.

"This is it, huh?" The young man mutters to himself, shielding himself from the slight cold of a dark Gotham night with a particular green jacket. A few years ago, he might have been taken aback by the sprawling height of the gothic architecture or the utter dirt and sprawl of the streets and alleyways, but a few years ago he hadn't yet travelled all across the US with his close friends in celebration of graduating college. Compared to New York, Gotham seems no different, save for the more depressing atmosphere and streets clear of most activity in the dead of midnight. Ben had expected things to look... more crooked; Gotham's reputation doesn't do it any favors.

This, though? The small uptown streets, faint warm glow of inviting neon signs, and glimmer of gothic windows? Ben could get used to this.

Unfortunately, he's in no position to "get used to this". The ringtone of his phone - a stereotypical 80's alien tune - anchors him straight back to the mission at hand. He reaches for his right pants pocket, the green metal of his strange watch providing a soft glow as always, and immediately picks up upon noticing who's giving him a ring.

"Y'ello? Kev?"

"I've arrived, yeah. Not as shitty-looking as I'd expect, remind me to take you and Gwen out here someti-" The youngster's eyes catch onto an ever-so-recognizable sign just as he walks on past it, stopping in his tracks to give it and the small establishment it belongs to a once-over. "-Yo is that a Mr. Smoothy's!? All the way out here, you've gotta be yanking my chain!" Ben rejoices amidst a few chuckles. Through the phone, Kevin's annoyed tone drags him back to the conversation at hand. Ben takes mental note of the establishment before continuing down the street.

"Yeah, yeah, I've got it, okay? Not a soul for miles out here, I can find it and call back before you know it, alright? Tell Gwen I said hi, see ya later." Waiting for Kevin to wish him luck, Ben hangs up and pockets his phone just as he passes yet another alleyway nestled between the crack of two skyscrapers.

It's not long afterwards Ben starts to hear activity rouse up around him; a pair of footsteps behind him, probably someone else walked out of a building and is on their merry way home. The sound grows, soon he's able to pick up on three separate pairs of footsteps besides his own. Things are getting tense, he can feel it. Just before hitting the next street to cross, another alleyway comes into view. Ben sighs in relief, suddenly taking a left turn straight into the narrow space. If those steps behind him are just passers by, they can continue on their merry way and save Ben the stress. If they aren't... at least they're out of the more public eye.

Of course, much to Ben's dismay, all three head straight after him. He turns around to get a good look at three large, scrappy figures blocking the alleyway's exit. By the looks of it, these aren't just regular thugs or crooks. One of them carries a spiked bat, the second dons a rusty pair of knives on his sides, and the largest of the three is nonchalantly waving a rather sizeable firearm about like a prized bouquet of flowers.

"What's with the matching outfits, boys?" Ben breaks the tense silence with a snark, eyeing the thugs up and down a few times. They're all wearing the very same rough jacket - a green and red number with several white stripes to serve as accents. "Did we just come back from a football game?"

"You know you gots some fuckin' NERVE keepin' your little bravado up like this, punk." The one carrying the bat steps forward, whacking his bat against one of the alleyway walls a few times as a sort of warning. "Either you're new here, or you've been gettin' pretty fuckin' lucky."

Ben sighs. This song and dance again. "Right, so you guys want either my money, my life, my phone, my watch, or all four. Name your price." He leans against the dead end of the alleyway, yawning.

The bat-wielding maniac seems to take this a little too personally, running straight up to Ben and pinning his neck to the wall behind him with the handle of his bat. To make things worse, the impact of the thug's knee against Ben's stomach knocks the wind from Ben's lungs and sending his breaths into a disarray.

"Listen here, asshole! You see a Mad Gang crook, and you fuckin' KNEEL to them! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?"

The tension of heavy silence returns for a few seconds, but it drags on for much longer in Ben's mind. He feels the bat pulled away, allowing him to get a good breath once again. He struggles to stay on his feet, clutching his stomach with both hands as his breathing stabilizes. The crooked fuck continues, a wicked grin upon his face.

"So you understand now, hm? You give us your wallet, your phone, and that dinky watch of yours, and I won't fuckin' bash your head in." Ben feels his chin lifted by the blunt end of the bat, lifted to lock eyes with the twisted fuck and his shit-eating grin.

"You know... I was considering letting you off easy.." Ben responds after another pause, looking up at the thug with an angry glare. Without so much as another word then, he suddenly slams his left hand over the face of his watch, causing it to envelop his body in a bright green flash.

The thug shields his eyes, taking a step back as regret starts to mount itself upon him. By the time his eyes have opened, he feels his throat grabbed onto by a larger, four-fingered hand. It presses tightly, enough to cause an immense struggle for air. The crook drops his bat, hands moving up to wedge themselves in-between the new assailant's hand and his throat, not finding even an inch of purchase.

His eyes can only behold the sight in front of him. Where once the usual everyday Ben stood, now stands a larger, red-skinned monster. Where his eyes stare forward onto a scowling, fanged snarl, his four eyes stare back. A red humanoid dressed in a black jumpsuit from the waist down, the face of Ben's watch in front of its makeshift belt. Most imposing of all is his muscle; built more than Superman, with an additional pair of arms to boot.

Ben, now Four Arms, speaks up, his fanged maw uttering his words in a low guttural growl.

"This-" A sharp jab to the thug's stomach draws out a pained scream of anguish from the now frightened man, all the air from his lungs knocked straight out by the sheer impact. "-is for my throat."

Right as the crooked man was considering saying his prayers, he feels himself tossed aside by the monster as it steps forward towards his little entourage of guards, cracking all four of his fists. "I don't want this getting bloody, boys. You know what to do."

The other two take the hint, backing away slowly before making a complete break for it, the bat-wielding thug soon following suit. Four Arms sighs, shaking his head. Of course, he can't go a single day without-

"You."

A voice behind the alien grabs his attention, and he turns in preparation only to behold the shadowed silhouette he had only heard of through rumor and hushed tone. The large cape and pointed head, the piercing gaze, the yellow symbol.

"Holy shit..." Four Arms mutters, giving the symbol on his belt a light tap, transforming back into the unassuming youngster Ben. "The Batman!? No fooling, you're really a thing?"

Before Ben could continue chattering on, he feels his chin gripped tightly by the gloved right hand of the caped crusader pulling him in close. Now that piercing gaze starts to settle, eliciting a nervous gulp from the youngster.

"You're coming with me."

[scaredofheroin]

Captain N - Chapter 1: Who Are You?

School.

The highlight of no teenager's day.

Peter Lavancha was no different.

Another day in English 12, another day in Midnight Lights High School, another day in America, another day on Earth.

As Peter idly twiddled his pencil in his hand, deliberately ignoring the research assignment currently assigned to him, his eyes glanced around the classroom. Sitting to his right was Jeremiah Coleman, one of the star football players who carried the Midnight Lights High Phantoms to state victory last year. To his left was Kimberly Sparks, one of the most talented artists in the school, whose still-life of a potted plant and car gears won the gold ribbon at the county fair. In front of Peter was Scott Hudson, who won third place at the school's science fair a month ago. Behind him was a bookshelf containing a uniform row of well-worn English textbooks, each uniquely damaged and vandalized from each other. Ms. Kirk's aged, exhausted visage accompanied the slouched-over form currently occupying the large desk at the other end of the classroom, switching from eyeing the students to make sure they're working on the assignment, and reviewing emails or other faculty-only forms. But the Word document occupied only by Peter's name, Ms. Kirk's name, the class and today's date: March 12, 2019.

The assignment was simple: research and write about your college and career path. The problem was: Peter had no idea. After graduation, a whole new world opens up. Infinite possibilities make themselves present to him, both good and bad. Sure, he could major in Business and see where that gets him, or he could go into an apprenticeship as an electrician. Or he could burn out. Peter heaved a heavy sigh, hanging his head. His mind wandered to the exciting, escapist worlds contained within the books published by DC Comics. For all that they had going against them, at least Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent knew what they were going to do with their life. And it certainly wasn't working 9 to 5 as an accountant. They would don their specially-made suits and use their unique powers and abilities to defend the innocent and save lives as Batman and Superman, the greatest superheroes ever put to paper. Peter knew his path wouldn't be as exciting. He knew he'll never get bitten by a radioactive spider, or take part in a super-soldier experiment, or be revealed to be the last son of planet Krypton. Peter would always be Peter.

The final bell of the day snapped Peter out of his self-pity, bringing a mixture of relief to finally be going home, and disappointment that he wasted essentially the entire class period daydreaming. The other students showed no such emotion, and hastily darted out from their desk to escape school. "Be sure to return your Chromebooks to the appropriate slot on the cart." Ms. Kirk sighed, knowing there would be at least three students that would misplace the cheaply-produced laptops. Peter gathered his bag, carefully put his Chromebook back in the cart and exited the classroom. The commotion of students small and tall hurriedly making their way to one of the building's three exits. Finding a spot to slip into the current of trendy clothes and hormones, Peter quickly made his way through the familiar halls and out the familiar front doors. The fresh air and warm sunlight were as great an antidote to the stress of classwork as ever. Taking a deep, appreciative breath, Peter walked over to the school parking lot, where the 18th birthday gift that is his car sits, as intact as it was this morning. Normally, that wouldn't be worth mentioning, but certain football players have made themselves enemies of the school's punks, and commonly find their car windows broken and their car bodies dented. Something about a party in September that Peter was, of course, not invited to. Peter dusted off his red varsity jacket and slipped his phone in his pocket before continuing his walk.

Peter threw his backpack in the back seat of his well-worn sedan, started the engine, and after buckling his seat belt like a responsible driver, began his daily drive home. The town of Midnight Lights was bustling with both teenagers and adults, but the foot and road traffic thinned the further Peter drove away from town. His home was about 20 minutes away from school, and while it was nice to live in a more peaceful neighborhood, Peter often envied how busy his colleague's social lives were. The further he drove, the more he fell into his pit. Jeremiah, Kimberly, Scott and many, many more students distinguished themselves with their own circle of friends, their own after-school schedules, their own talents and achievements. Surely they would have no trouble researching and writing about what they're gonna do after high school. Sure, Peter had some friends, but his hobbies could be summarized with "movies and comic books". He wasted his previous three years in high school alone in his room, catching up on what his preferred superheroes had been up to. He didn't think much of it at the time, but looking back, he's filled with immense regret.

Oh well, can't change the past.

The more Peter drove, the more he felt... different. The road and trees remained the same, but he and the car he was driving felt light. Almost as if he's floating.

Then, in the blink of an eye, the car was engulfed in a brilliant white light, and both Peter and the car vanished without a trace.

ELSEWHERE...

Two figures shot across the sky. A young, winged young man armed with a bow, followed by a white and blue, single-occupant spaceship were rapidly approaching a heavily-armored Airship. As soon as the two were visible to the Airship's occupants, the ship's commander gave the order to open fire. The cannons beneath deck charged power and took aim at the two. The winged one quickly banked out of the way, but the spaceship was only barely able to avoid the particle beam that shot out of the cannon. Once the winged one flew over the deck, he quickly pulled back the string, and a magic arrow materialized in the bow. A blink of an eye later, he shot the arrow at the commander, but the commander was too quick, and used his own magic to deflect the arrow. The spaceship shot into the distance, making a turn around to shoot back at the airship. This time, the spaceship's pilot was more prepared, and swiftly dodged the following particle beams shooting from the airship's cannons. As it drew close enough to return fire, the pilot of the spaceship found that his energy shots were absorbed by the airship's energy shields. Despite the effectiveness of the airship's protection, the commander inside had concern painted across his face. Making his way below deck, he quickly made his way to the communications room. The particle cannons made the airship tremble with each shot, but the commander was able to open a channel to his superior. The large screen in the dark room lit up, and was immediately filled with the visage of a large, stern turtle-like creature.

"What is it, Kamek?" The creature on the screen asked, anger seeping from the corners of its mouth. Kamek gulped before answering. "W-Well, I'm just not sure this airship can handle much more of this. The particle cannons are causing extreme stress to the ship, and we fear continued use will end up doing more damage than those Mushroom Kingdom stooges could!" Kamek answered. The creature roared in anger, unsatisfied with the answer given. "We did not come this far to retreat because you're too cowardly to do what needs to be done!" The creature's anger made the camera on the other end shake, making Kamek intimidated further. "B-B-But Lord Bowser, sir, if we end up damaging the-" "SILENCE! Do as you're ordered! Continue the assault, wipe out those two imbecils in the sky and join K. Rool and Dedede's airships!" Bowser ordered, cutting the video before Kamek could respond again. Hearing the spaceship zoom over head once more, Kamek steeled his nerve and returned topside, confronting the two flying assailants.

Not too far away, a white castle with red roofing was facing an assault from two other airships. The two attempted to use their particle cannons to attack the castle, but the castle was protected by a magic shield. Two figures atop the roof stood, using their staffs to concentrate protection to where the particle cannons were being aimed. The male figure attempted to use his staff to direct lightning back at the airships, but to little avail. The female figure cast a spell around the castle, reinforcing the shield. Smaller castle-goers ran around the roof, distinguished by their mushroom-like head wear, desperately trying to maintain structural integrity in any way they can. One of the smaller ones ran up to the male with the staff, desperate for help. "Lord Raiden, how much longer do we have?" The small helper asked. "At this rate, not much longer." Raiden informed the little one, helping very little. "Get back inside and ensure the Princesses are safe!" The female one instructed the mushroom people. "Listen to Palutena, there is nothing more you can help with here." Raiden added. The mushroom people quickly obliged, disappearing back inside the castle, leaving Palutena and Raiden alone to face the airships. Not a word more was exchanged as the two continued their defense. The airships drew closer, their particle cannons causing more intense reverberations with each shot. With Raiden's lightning and Palutena's light barriers, it started to seem that defeat was inevitable.

Then, a flash of light suddenly erupted, and a wave of energy soon followed.

When the light dissipated, Palutena and Raiden saw that the airship's cannons were catastrophically damaged, and the ships themselves could only barely manage to stay in the air. Realizing their situation, the airships hastily made their retreat, disappearing into the clouds. The airship that troubled the spaceship and flying young man retreated as well, leaving them confused, but relieved. Out of the corner of his eyes, the flying young man noticed a car crashed against a stray tree. This was like no car he'd ever seen, so he got the attention of the spaceship's pilot, and the two quickly flew down to investigate.

The car's driver door opened, and Peter awkwardly staggered out. He hit his head pretty hard on impact, but he's dealt with worse. Assessing the damage, Peter groaned upon seeing how badly the tree damaged the front. The body's dented, the headlights are smashed, the grill's twisted out of shape, there's no way this is salvageable. "Great, dad's gonna kill... me..?" Peter sighed to himself, his frustration turning to confusion upon further looking around. Everything around him was a bit... off. The air tasted a bit different, the tree is colored a bit different, the grass is textured a bit different. It's as if Peter got stranded in the Uncanny Valley.

"Hey, are you okay?" Came a voice from behind Peter. "Yeah, my car's pretty much ruined, but I'm fine-" Peter answered, freezing in place upon seeing who he was talking to. One was a winged young man with short brown hair and adorned in white robes, and the other was an anthropomorphic blue falcon with a silver jacket and robot legs. Peter felt frozen in place, unable to respond. Did he die? Is he hallucinating? Is he in a coma? Why are these two strange people talking with him?

"Well, that's a relief! My name's Pit, and this is Falco Lombardi!" The young man beamed, introducing himself and motioning to the anthropomorphic bird beside him. Falco peered at Peter suspiciously, taking note of his unusual nature.

"...Who are you?" Falco asked, drawing closer to Peter.

[bwprowl]

It’s east vs west, Marvel vs DC, and expensive vs cheap tonight, as I roll up lowdowns on red-hot new video game figma, ridiculous new movie toys, and more unexpected entries into our aisles. I’ve also got a quick run-through of some of the newer-wave Titan Transformers I finally managed to find. Hope you enjoy these Tuesday Night Toys!

New Stuff: Red Son

Those DC movies are still happening, and for obvious reasons just don’t carry with them the same anticipatory excitement as the Marvel movies they’re trying to emulate. I mean of course I know everyone’s saying Wonder Woman is good and I do need to see it, but that’s one win out of, like, the last four? Look, I know this is a toy blog not a movie blog, but I don’t think I’m out of line in saying that I’m not really looking forward to a Justice League movie carrying on from the setup from friggin’ Batman v Superman.

Fortunately Mattel’s toys for these things at least look pretty cool, as always! Ol’ Matty’s really stepped up their game with the varied Multiverse line in recent years, and these will be falling under that banner, as usual for the movies. That great Wonder Woman design is in there again, of course, and we get looks at the new Cyborg and Flash. Looks like this will be a decently affordable, easy way to build your League, if you feel so compelled.

But the big shot of adrenaline for me is the new Batmobile they’ll be releasing here as well! This is a huge, ambitious, electronic statement of a thing. It’s basically a big remote control car you control with an app on your phone, and it’s got lights and sound effects and *actual damn smoke* that comes out of the exhaust (do you have to…refill it somehow?) and basically AR effects that you watch through the cockpit on your phone while you’re playing with it. It truly feels like an absurd next-generation play pattern for toys like this, and as someone who’s watched others worry that toys were losing so much ground to electronics and smartphones, seeing them blended together for an ultra-modern take like this is incredibly exciting. This Batmobile is bound to be ridiculously expensive, but I’ll be tempted to go in on it purely for next-level novelty. This is like a new, super-powerful videogame console to someone like me.

Also in the DC corner of things, statue-maker Tweeterhead will be offering a properly tiny displayable version of the Bottled City of Kandor as an SDCC exclusive. This mainstay minipolis from the Superman lore is a great idea for a piece like this. It's even got an actual glass dome! Kinda disappointing it'll only be an exclusive, but at least they're offering people an option to order it non-attendee after the con.

We also found out through pre-order listings that McFarlane Toys will be doing toys based off Stranger Things. There's just mock-ups for now, but at least Eleven and Chief Hopper are due out in November, so if you, like about a zillion people (including myself) are a fan of that show, this'll be worth keeping an eye on.

For the more traditional type of new-stuff hype, figma Red was formally revealed and just put up for pre-order! The original Pokemon trainer (specifically in his FireRed/LeafGreen design) has topped figma wishlists for quite some time now, so seeing Good Smile finally deliver is welcome. Less welcome is the usual odd restrictions with import Pokemon products: Getting Red direct from Good Smile (with the bonus Pikachu) is impossible outside of Asia. The good news is that more universal exporters like AmiAmi seem all too happy to take pre-orders to ship Red anywhere, and he’s discounted decently there besides. Yeah, you miss out on the Pikachu, but at least the option is there.

Now we start demanding Green and Blue

Wishlist: More Heroes

Yes, figma Tracer was revealed last week and yes, she looks great, and yes, you were going to buy her regardless of if I mentioned her or not. Look guys, I’m in the same boat. The day she was put up for pre-order I went in for three: one for me, and one each for a couple of my friends to split shipping with because we all knew we had to have her. Overwatch is a rightfully stupidly popular game, and Tracer is the exceedingly likable, delightfully well-designed face of that game, and Max Factory’s team has brought her to life as well as you expect from the figma line at this point. I don’t even *play* Tracer, but I like her and I want to let MF and GSC know that I’ll go in for more figma of these characters. Guys, I will drop $150+ on a D.va figma with her MEKA.

Also start placing your bets for which alternate skin she gets recolored into first. I’m hoping for Posh, myself

On the complete opposite end of things, I spotted this in Target the other day: A Titan Heroes Scarlet Spider. And not the most recent, genuinely awesome, I-wish-he-was-voiced-by-Crispin-Freeman Kaine version of Scarlet Spider, but the original, 90’s as hell, wearing-a-hoodie-over-a-red-leotard Scarlet Spider! It is frankly ridiculous to see something buried in as much, at this point, niche comic history as OG Scarlet Spider getting an entry in the cheapo directly-kid-targeted toyline like this, and that’s already plenty of amusement value to me (oh my god and I just realized he’s sharing shelf space with the Marvel Legends toy of the god-danged Jackal). As someone with a special place in his heart for Scarlet (and 90’s Spider-nonsense in general), at less than ten bucks I might just grab this dumb thing for myself.

Show this toy to your parents and watch their eyes glaze over with a knowing weariness

Oh, and if you’ve been needing an officially-produced role/cos-play version of Joker’s mask from that popular little Persona game, you can pre-order one now…for way too damn much.

On Desk: Titans Return returns

Stupid Walgreens wave. These newest Titans Return Transformers first, for whatever reason, dropped at the drug-store chain rather than the usual retail spots like Target and Wal-Mart, where they cost even more and were pretty hard to find. I never even saw a trace of them in my local area, and the one I did find at a Walgreens, Krok, I did while I was out of town. So I was pretty glad to find the other two I was looking forward to at Target finally last week.

I was happy to pay too much while I was on vacation for Krok, though. I liked the Skullsmasher mold quite a bit originally, and this version renders it in gorgeous colors, and he’s got a sweet new headsculpt, and he’s a remade Action Master! Oh and he’s a popular guy in those popular current comics so I guess people will like him cause of that too. Really though, it’s just his looks that do it for me. Krok’s original bio was that he was a former cyber-football player, and these colors rather do look like they’d be at home on some sort of sports uniform. Going with the footballer theme, Krok’s old Action Master partner was named Gatoraider (geddit? geddit?), but Hasbro *for some reason* decided that name wouldn’t pass legal now, so his new Titan Master pal is given the even more stupidly awesome moniker of ‘Gatorface’. I love him.

I also love Topspin. Here’s a guy I at least knew I was going to get regardless just to fill out my Wreckers team, but Hasbro sprung a surprise on everyone and made new Topspin a really cool toy! He’s solid and chunky, fitting his root look well while still being dynamic and posable, and his transformation is in-goddamned-sane, especially given that his old version was just a ‘fold in half’ deal. There is so much clever unfolding and compressing going on in this toy. It actually took me a second to figure out how to fold the arms in on their elbows because that is a trick I have legit never seen on a Transformer before! Getting a toy of this level of a guy like *Topspin* in this day and age is, frankly, unbelievable! He’s an outstanding addition to the lineup and I cannot wait for him to be remolded into Twin Twist.

And then there’s Perceptor. Look, Perceptor would have a hard enough time measuring up to the strong starts of Krok and Topspin already, but he’s just kind of an okay toy on his own. I mean, he’s probably better as a toy and as a Perceptor than the *last* Perceptor from Reveal the Shield, but again, not a hard bar to clear. This guy’s just kinda small and gangly and his knee swivels are too loose and the joint his scope slides on is too tight. It is cool that we get the ol’ dumb microscope mode back, as well as the half-assed tank mode (more full-assed here with dedicated parts to transform into it and everything), plus a sniper rifle for good All Hail Megatron homage action. But there’s just too many little niggles that make him not feel as cool as the other guys I got from this wave. Neat, but I really wish he could have been better.

Nerd

So thanks for indulging me in all that everyone! Now you go and have fun, and I’ll see you next time!