#You lived for an entirety and you couldn't come up with something better?

[fey-ax]

At first, I was shaken when I saw the 2 on empathy for Kuras. But after thinking about it for a few moments it does make sense. He is a being who lived for eons. Living a short life is probably as relatable for him as being immortal for us. I bet even monsters don't have life spans as long as him.

Moreover, imagine how painful it would be to have a lot of empathy and see people die again and again. Not just because of war or disease, but because their life is finite.

I think Kuras is keeping people at a distance as a way to protect himself, but sometimes he gets too close to someone despite himself.

[predestinatos]

we so lowkey - OP81

pairing: oscar piastri x fem!reader (x tiny bit of charles at the beginning)

summary: "the game is called truth or dare for a reason" | 5k words. warnings underneath. MINORS DNI.

tags: smut, sort of stoner!oscar, jealous charles to drive the plot, college student reader, dirty talking.

warnings: drugs (weed), cigarettes, (consensual) unprotected sex, backshots, a lot of dirty talking, oral (male and female receiving), double orgasm.

notes: sorry for the delay, i have been on a writing slump (ignore the fact that this is 5k words long...) and trying to enjoy my last days with my bf before he leaves on erasmus!! but i hope you guys like this one. lmk your thoughts and thank u for ur patience always!

"I am not getting drunk today" you said, putting your foot down. "I can take tipsy, but not drunk" your friend laughed at your comment but nodded in agreement, both of you acknowledging the fact that you had to calm yourselves down now that exams season approached. "It's just a small get together either way" your friend replied, shrugging. your clothes scattered across your clean room, an off-putting contrast you couldn't avoid. "You know a 'small get together' usually means at least 30 people" you applied lipstick in front of your closet mirror as you observed your friend through it. "He's here" your friend whispered as you entered the living room of the dorm room heavily decorated with alcohol and LED lights. She needn't say who she was referring to, for the name sounded forbidden yet that's what made it so enticing. grabbing yourself a drink and glancing around the room, you realized it really was a rather small group. it seemed comprised of around 20 people, the girl to boy ratio very balanced. if you didn't know better, you'd say this was planned. the first sip of alcohol touched your tongue and you swallowed happily, moving slowly to the rhythm of the music along with your friend. "Will you hate me if i leave you for a second?" she asked, lips close to your ear in nervous secrecy. you merely looked at her brown doe eyes and smiled, the best answer you could give her. You were both in college for more than grades - you were there for the full experience. the regrets, the bodies, the hands, the flirting, the waking up with a headache - it was all part of this phenomenal journey that lasted around 3 years, and you'd enjoy every single one of them. so as she left to go talk to someone, you knew you'd be fine. Of course you would, because as if he was waiting, Charles approached you, all strong perfume smell and smug attitude approaching you. "Didn't know you were coming" his eyes look down at you as he remains close but without touching you, daring you to make the first move. "Me neither, or I wouldn't have come" you spat, eyes shotting up at his, expression unchanging and unaffected, almost please with the reply. cocking his head to the side he brought his hand to your chin, stroking it softly yet teasingly. "You were never good at that when it comes to me" he said, clinking his plastic cup against yours, mocking you in a frustrating yet attractive way. you we're supposed to be having fun, fucking around and getting to know how other bodies fit in your bed, yet for the entirety of this year Charles Leclerc had been the one fulfilling that duty. It frustrated you, how you were so addicted to how he felt and made you feel, how the two of you had more than chemistry, creating friction during lectures and letting it all out during the night.

You weren’t exclusive, nor did you discuss feelings – something the both of you appreciated, since this back and forth between you two was pleasurable enough and it had absolutely zero strings attached. Breathing in deeply, you decided to simply strike him back the way you two enjoyed “what can I say, I’m a good actress.”

He exhaled through his nose with a smile that recognized your humor and your momentary win, a ‘touché’ leaving his lips in perfect French, attractive enough to make you take another sip of your drink in order to focus on something else.

Minutes pass with the music blasting and you and Charles going back and forth between dancing and teasing each other, your mutual attraction clear to everyone around. Yet, after a while, the volume lowered as someone announce “truth or dare! Everyone gather in a circle on the floor please!”

Everyone complied – easily so, given the fact that there weren’t that many people in the room, making it extra personal and giving everyone a chance to talk and meet each other, something you didn’t particularly do. After around 2 minutes, everyone sat enthusiastically, talking to each other with slightly lightheaded giddiness that only came after the right amount of drinks. To your left sat your best friend, side eyeing you disapprovingly at the person to your right – Charles. “Way to meet new people” she said, ironically. Pretending to be mad wasn’t her forte, as she laughed slightly at your predictableness and you shrugged, “c’est la vie!”  “And now you’re speak French?”

The host – a beautiful girl with the most amazing curly hair and prettiest eyes you’d ever seen, sat down and clapped her hands, an “alright!” coming out of her exhale. “We will spin this bottle twice: first chooses truth or dare, second gives the truth or dare. Be interesting, please!” she explained, causing everyone to laugh excitedly.

The bottle spun, landing on a boy who you were sure had had a thing for your friend for the longest time. “Dare” he decided as the bottle spun once again, landing on Charles. “I dare you to text ‘I miss you’ to the 6th person in your contacts” he said smuggishly. Everyone ‘oooh’ed as the boy grabbed his phone and searched for said contact. “Fuck-“ he exhaled, frustrated, “it’s my ex.” Charles merely laughed as he said “those are the rules!” nonchalantly placing a hand on your upper thigh without even a glance. Before you could ask, the boy’s voice exclaimed “done!” as he showcased his screen to everyone in a circle, the hand on your thigh disappearing as fast as it arrived.

A couple of rounds went by, you asking one person about their shittiest sexual experience and more drinks being poured as people kissed each other after being dared to, when, around the 9th time, the bottle landed on the dark brown eyed boy you and your friend always found adorable. His name was Oscar, and he usually kept to himself, coming to these get togethers and hanging out with his own friends shyly, occasionally smoking but never getting too drunk or too high. “Truth” he said, his voice deep and sweet like a caress, contrasting with the way he fidgeted nervously in his seat. For the second time, the bottle landed on Charles, who rubbed is hand in a mockingly villainous way. “Oscar… Who in this circle have you had fantasies about?”

Oscar instantaneously blushes, hand running through his hair nervously with a shy smile across his face, revealing an adorable set of teeth that made you smile as well. “Fuck’s sake…” he exhaled softly, before downing his drink quickly in order to provide him with some confidence to reply. “I’m gonna regret this” he repeats, everyone jokingly complaining about the suspense he was creating. “I’m sorry in advance, Charles” he exclaims, before his arm lifts towards you and your eyes cross. Still bushing but with a darker expression, almost as if reviewing some thoughts he had, his gaze pierced yours making you feel as if he could show you his own thoughts. Everyone ‘oooo’ed once again, clapping and drinking, despite Charles’ body tensing slightly as he said “sorry for what?”

Oscar merely shrugged, “for anything”, an apologetic smile showing up, one you couldn’t ignore.

The game lasted only a few more rounds until the small crowd distracted themselves with each other, getting up to get more drinks and not returning due to slightly drunk forgetfulness. However, even that small amount of time was enough to feel the palpable tension whenever Oscar’s eyes crossed yours, a quick glance away and joke throwing making you almost believe like you had imagined everything. His nonchalant persona combined with the knowledge that he had thought of you in other contexts drew you in, the same way your instant shyness and inability to look away only intensified his desires.

The boy next to you, however, was tenser than you had ever seen him, despite his great attempts at hiding it. Even before you could confront him about it, Charles’ excused himself, claiming that he had an exam first thing in the morning. Eyebrows furrowed, you knew that wasn’t true, but he merely kissed your cheek goodbye and closed the door behind you.

You were frustrated. In more ways than one, your body still very much coherent to take things lightly and carefree. Your leg shook up and down nervously as your best friend sat next to you in a couch, talking to an attractive girl she had her eyes on for a while. Tapping her shoulder lightly, you motioned the ‘gonna smoke’ sign with your hands, to which she smiled in recognition.

Opening the closest window to the balcony that oversaw the city, cold air hitting your lungs, you let your back hit the wall and let out a much needed breath. Grabbing a cigarette, you placed it between your lips as you searched for your lighter, the closeness of the relief imminent in your veins. The technicolor lights shone bright, cars moving like fireflies dancing to the rhythm of the song.

It was white noise that calmed you, the muffled sound of the music restarting in the house as you took more drags of your cigarette. You were so immersed in the sheer act, as if it was a meditation technique, that you barely noticed the light brown haired boy opening and closing the window, placing himself next to you, with a respectable distance between your bodies.

“Have some light?” he asked, and you jumped at the sound of his voice, the realization he was there. You nodded and handed him your lighter, and he thanked you as he lit up a perfectly wrapped blunt. “Sorry, by the way” he exhaled, along with the smoke that got out of his mouth, eyes roaming through the landscape in front.

“No problem, I get startled easily” you replied, admiring his side profile. His features were both hard and soft, eyes shining brightly in such a relaxed expression it mesmerized you, the way he let out a soft chuckle at your response. “I’m not apologizing for that,” he started, filling his lungs once again. “I’m apologizing for earlier.”

This time, he turned his head towards you, and you noticed his flushed cheeks, slight embarrassment still showing even as his body and mind relaxed. “For saying you fantasize about me or for saying sorry to Charles?” you asked, daringly. It had offended you, hurt you, even, that he had apologized to Charles as if the guy owned you, as if that answer needed to pass some sort of approval from him before becoming valid.

Oscar merely shrugged, “both, I suppose.” His eyes seemed a bit sleepier already as they rather shamelessly roamed your body, followed by his head resting against the wall as he looked up. You felt the tension, electrifying both your bodies already, shivers invading your body – maybe from the cold, maybe from the sheer presence of his indifferent frame.

“Was it true?” the question hung the air for a few seconds after it left your lips, your cigarette now almost over. “Depends on if you want it to be true or not,” a dazed giggle mixed between his words.

“I wouldn’t be asking if I didn’t” you crossed your arms in front of your chest after putting out your cigarette in the ashtray next to the balcony. His gaze turned to yours, lowering towards your chest before moving back to your eyes. “The game is called truth or dare for a reason” he answered, leaning sideways against the wall so he could look at you fully.

You rolled your eyes at his sarcasm, though you couldn’t deny how attracted you were to how he played out this nonchalant persona, the indifference contrasting with his words making your body burn.

 “And that,” he started, the hand holding the blunt pointing towards you, in a upwards and downwards movement. “That’s exactly why I have them.” Confusion invaded your mind as you failed to understand what his words meant, although his brown eyes remained on you as if revisiting every thought he ever had. “What?”

“You’re a tease without even realizing it,” he started, closing the distance between you a bit more, eyes glued to your lips as if fighting the urge to kiss you. “Describe them for me” you whispered, using your closeness to your advantage.

“How about I show you?” he whispered back, breath hot against your ear as his index finger ran along the exposed skin of your neck. Though you tensed, feeling your entire body respond to his suggestion, mouth watering, you wanted to play a bit more.

“What about ‘sorry, Charles’?” you mouthed, irony laced all over your smirk as you looked up at him lustfully. Oscar’s gaze scans the inside of the apartment quickly, more figuratively than literally, before turning back to you. “I don’t see him here now, do you?”

His index finger brushed your chin, forcing your gaze towards yours once more. “If I were him I would’ve made sure you only craved me.”

“How?” your voice was hoarse and breathy, your thighs slowly clenching at the need for touch. “Let’s just say my name would be the only thing you’d be able to utter.”

Your eyebrows raised and your breath got stuck in your throat as his lips brushed against you. You felt almost embarrassed at the effect his words and demeanor had on you, requiring little to no touch to get a reaction out of your entire body. This was not the Oscar Piastri you knew from a couple of shared classes, who sat at the back and always left first, who remained in his own zone at parties, interacting with a couple of closest friends. The fact that he was showing a more daring, direct and sexual attitude towards you felt like a compliment, exclusivity being silently attributed to you.

“Didn’t take you for such a fuckboy” you commented, almost as if making sure that this wasn’t actual his usual move, something everybody knew but didn’t talk about, a party trick he commonly used. He chuckled slightly, so close to you that you could see his throat bobbing up and down in though and feel his scent – some very light perfume that faded slightly due to the smell of the joint he was now finishing. “And I’m not,” he smiled, “I just know what I want. And I’ve been wanting you for so fucking long…” he trailed off, his eyes scanning every inch of you with lust, dropping to your lips for a few seconds longer than anywhere else, before returning to your eyes.

Before you knew it, his lips were on yours, ravenous and hungry for you. Your hands were on his soft hair, tugging it ever so slightly as his tongue teased yours and his breathing increased. Gripping your waist, Oscar pinned you against the balcony wall, the people on the other side of it disappearing from both of your minds as soon as you touched. His kissed matched him so well – so careless yet not aggressive nor bad, just confident and slow paced, as if possessing all the time in the world to enjoy every part of you. You couldn’t help but moan at the novelty of it, how different he was, how his touch left your body burning with freezing need for more.

His lips curved into a smile upon hearing you, an aroused gleefulness displayed in between kisses, fueling an ever growing necessity inside both of you. One of his hands rose to your neck, his thumb caressing your cheek sweetly, that touch so opposite from his grip that claimed you as his for a moment.

As soon as that moment came, it went away, his face distancing from yours, one of his hands attempting to fix the mess you had made of his hair. “I need you so bad right now” he whispered, cursing to himself at the loss of composure he ensured he had built. You merely stared at his disheveled look, frustrated desire written across his body as his brown eyes seemed to darken as time went by. You did not dare to speak, afraid no words would come out, brain foggy from sharing the absolute same wish as his: to continue what you started, to finish it completely.

“My dorm room is literally right above this one” he said after a few seconds, steading his breath in order to seem calmer, more relaxed and casual about the clear tension between you. You knew what he meant and knew he wouldn’t be elaborating any further. Knew he would simply go to his room and wait, watching tv as if you showing up – or not – wouldn’t influence much of his night. Like whatever was happening wasn’t happening, like he didn’t just say he needed you.

You replied with a nod as he opened the door and climbed inside, knowing that when you entered that kitchen he wouldn’t be there anymore. You waited a few more minutes, smoking another cigarette as you considered your options, tried to clear your head and think rationally, yet it was hard as every part of your body ached for more of him, your legs weak just from the kiss you shared on the balcony. Finishig your smoke, you climbed inside the kitchen, where people remained unaware of what happened outside, as if you belonged to two different channels that now intertwined.

You searched for your best friend, wanting to let her know where you were going, reassuring that she needn’t worry but that you’d be just one floor above in case she needed something. Finding her was harder than you thought, minutes passing with you growing more nervous at the prospect of Oscar having given up on you, thinking you had done the same with him. Had he more options? Was he this open with every woman he found attractive? These thoughts clouded your mind as your eyes crossed with your best friend’s and she ran towards you. Tipsy, but not drunk. Good. You both filled each other in on what you had missed during the short time you weren’t next to each other, promising to be close if any of you were in need. Her good luck wink gave you all the approval you needed to leave that dorm room and head towards the upper floor.

The floor vibrated with the music underneath – Oscar wasn’t lying when he said it his room was right above – every beat pulsating with energy that matched your own beating heart. Your nervous hands knocked on the door, your mind too aware of your stance, wondering what would be considered normal in a situation like this. But all those thoughts evaporated your mind as the door opened and you were greeted with the mesmerizing view of the boy you had just made out with.

His hair was slightly damp, indicating that he had taken a shower, or was in the middle of one, as you noticed some droplets running across his smooth skin and a towel lazily wrapped around his hips. You felt hypnotized by his slight smirk and unpreoccupied appearance as he step aside to let you in. “Was starting to think you wouldn’t come” he commented as he pointed towards the sofa in the middle of the apartment, sitting casually next to you. “Hence the look” he continued, giggling slightly.

You were too aware of how naked he was and how little he seemed to care about it. He kept a comfortable distance between you, as if allowing you to stand up and leave were you to change your mind. But that wasn’t even an option to you as his eyes landed on your lips, lingering in there before he gently shook his head and looked up at the ceiling. “God, you have me wrapped around your finger” his tone was half joke, half truth, as if he couldn’t believe it himself, how you seemed to so effortlessly produce such an effect on him.

“Well, I was promised something” you shrugged teasingly, your confidence growing as you realized how much he craved you, how this was something he actually wanted for a while. With your comment, his eyes shot back to you, and his body quickly followed, hovering above yours, droplets of water falling delicately on your face as he looked down at you, hands placed on each side of your head. You couldn’t help but bite your lip hungrily, crossing your legs tightly trying to relieve some of the need you were feeling.

Oscar’s eyes remained on your face as he stopped your legs with his own. “No” he whispered with assertion. “You want me to show you want I imagine doing to you, then you’ll have to play your part and look pretty while at it.”

You were shocked at his words and actions and how they affected you, making it so the only thing you could do in response was nod. Your eyes wanted to wander to where the towel threatened to unwrap himself, but Oscar’s soft finger lifted your chin towards him. “Eyes on me” despite it being a command, his voice indicated anything but that. It was calm and reassuring, confident but not cocky.

His thumb grazed across your lower lip, fondling it gently before opening your mouth subtly. He inserted his index and middle finger inside your mouth, pushing smoothly against your tongue. You took it upon yourself to wrap your lips around them, sucking on them, your tongue playing with his skin as you maintained eye contact. “Fuck” he cursed, muscles trembling from trying to keep his position and composure.

After some seconds, he removed his fingers from your mouth, replacing them with his own lips, hungrily possessing you. As he did this, causing your brain to go lightheaded and register little to nothing at all apart from his touch and tongue caressing you, his hand slid down your exposed stomach to the inside of your jeans. Your arms were around his neck, trying to pull him closer despite the impossibility of it – but you needed more. More of him, of his touch and of his body on yours.

His finger caressed your clit softly, satisfying your needs in part, but simultaneously leaving you more frustrated. You couldn’t help but whimper, trying to grind against his teasing hand, hips moving almost instinctively, which caused a sensuous chuckle to leaving his lips. “You sound even better than what I imagined,” his finger dipped lowered towards your entrance, teasing it, playing with your own desperate hunger. “And you’re wetter, too.”

You moaned at his words, and despair invaded your brain, your hands rushing to unbutton your pants and giving Oscar all the liberty of movement, a silent plea for the feeling of him inside you. Your walls clenched around nothing when he pulled your top up, revealing your exposed breasts. His eyes lingered on them as he tasted you, placing his fingers in his mouth while his other hand removed the towel from around his waist.

Finally, you thought, throwing your own jeans on the floor, red lace panties covering little to nothing of the lower half of your body.

His erection sprang free as he dropped the towel as well, the tip glistening with pre cum, its entire length throbbing. His hand wrapped around it as he took the entire sight of you in, eyelids revealing a drunken thrill as his breath became more irregular.

“I thought about this so many fucking times” he started, not with longing but with a primal urge to have you, a matter-of-fact tone in his voice that caused your whole body to erupt in need. “Come here”

Oscar positioned himself on his knees at the edge of the couch, continuously stoking himself as you moved towards him on all fours, not daring to look away from the sheer sight of him. Pulling your hair, he directed your face towards his erection, pressing it against your lips. You opened your mouth and enveloped him slowly, savoring the salty taste of him as your tongue explored his length. Each one of your caresses made him groan and sigh in pleasure, your head bobbing up and down underneath him.

The sight of you was beautifully overwhelming to him, especially as you started grinding your hips against nothing at all. “Fuck, if I knew you wanted it this bad I would… I would’ve done this earlier” he struggled to say, mesmerized at how your eyes looked up at him, ecstasy-filled.

You moaned against his cock, vibrations traveling throughout his body as he jerked his hips up, deeper into you, more than what you thought possible. You teared up with the suddenness of it, though it made you dizzy with pleasure.

That pleasure was short-ended as his hand pulled your hair softly, an indication for you to stop. As he removed himself from inside your mouth, a string of saliva connected you both, your lips now swollen and red, shiny with spit.

Oscar lowered himself in order to kiss you while laying you on the sofa once again, his mouth leaving wet marks all over your body until it reached the area underneath your bellybutton. He blew softly on your skin, and goosebumps invaded your body as he pulled your underwear down and off of you, hands now placed around your thighs, opening them with fervor. Before you could register the coldness hitting your now exposed skin, his face buried in between your legs, licking you softly as his damp hair touched the skin on your thighs.

The warmth of his mouth contrasted with his still-wet hair, your mind clouded by wanting to wrap your legs around him and the instinct to pull away from the cold. He grinned against your wet pussy before sucking your clit, your hands flying towards his hair, pushing him against you.

“So needy…” he whispered, readjusting himself so he could bury two fingers into you and keep his attention on your clit, devouring you. His tongue sent your body into frenzied shivers, his name escaping your lips incoherently. His fingers intensified their pace, sliding in and out of you and curling inside you. “Fuck, you taste so good” he mumbled, “and my name sounds so good when you whimper it” he now looked at you intently, analyzing your pleasure with so much attention it almost made you blush – were your cheeks not red due to the heat of the desire. It was all so much, so much you couldn’t focus on it all, your body erupting into an orgasm, walls pulsating around his fingers, his gaze adoring your body and all of its movements.

Your chest rose and fell almost as fast as your heart beat, and you giggled, actually giggled, from how lightheaded you felt. “I need to see and hear that again” he stared, more than asked you, although he remained in place, only his hand slowly pulling out from inside you, covered in your juices. He wasted no time in wrapping it around his own erection, now even more visibly hungry for something – someone. You.

“Please” he pleaded, suddenly looking so greedy, so needy and desperate. For some reason, this reignited the desire within you, and although your body was still recovering from the intoxicating orgasm, you were ready to do it all again.

“Do I keep going in your fantasy?” you asked, voice hoarse and breathy. His eyes widened slightly, the pace of his movement as he worked himself up increased as he nodded. “Then why are you asking me?” you told him, the fact that you consented implicit in your tone, your legs spreading apart for him to gawk at.

He barely needed two seconds before positioning himself between your legs once again, the tip of his cock rubbing against your entrance. “You’re soaking” he tried saying, stumbling across some vowels due to his own excitement. “I don’t know if I can last much” he slowly entered you, savoring as every inch buried deeper inside you, “you drive me fucking crazy.”

Your eyes rolled the back of your head at how he filled you up, at his praise as he did so, at how good he sounded when incoherence and pleasure laced his words. His hips moved, at first in a slow, consistent, pace, which quickly changed after some seconds, along with his breathing.

His eyebrows furrowed as your nails dug into his back, the sudden pain feeling so thrilling when mixed with the pleasure of being inside you. “Turn around” he said, pulling himself out of you for less than a second, giving you only time to lay on your stomach with your ass in the air.

That position allowed for him to go even deeper inside you, to hear you scream in pleasure as your own hand touched your clit in desperate need for more release. “You like that?” he asked in between breaths, knowing he could barely hold it any longer.

You tried saying the word ‘yes’ but even that failed you, your vision cloudy and your head foggy as you felt him close to release. His moans increased in loudness and intensity, your name being one of the few coherent things he could say before pulling himself out of you and orgasming, his cum spread across your back.

You couldn’t do anything but succumb to your own pleasure erratically, the simultaneous nature of your orgasms driving you into your own craziness.

Your body collapsed on the couch as his pressed tightly against you, both of you trying to gather your thoughts. Lying on his back, his head now looking at the ceiling, Oscar turned to you softly. “Want to sleep over?”

Your plan was not going to work.

[writteninlunarlight-years]

Wound patching headcanons with Adam, Lucifer, alastor, and vox? As in, patching their wounds? Getting all close and personal, taking care of them, kissing it better. You know, the good stuff 🫣🫣🤭

Adam

When he came back from hell, injured and bloodied, all thoughts left your mind; all you could think about was saving him.

Crying as you stitched up his stab wounds and hoped that Lute got him back home in enough time that he would live another day.

You were diligent and careful with every inch of his body as you worried that the man you loved would never return to you.

As he woke up, you felt immediate relief and held him close to you for days straight till he was strong enough again.

You let him have it once he was strong enough to handle physical activities. Your voice carried through the entirety of the angelic tower.

Once your rant about taking care of himself and the wrongness of extermination was over, he was happy to open his arms up for you.

Even though you tried hard to continue being mad, it was impossible not to climb into bed with him and hold him even longer.

Lucifer

When he had fallen, you also fell just inches behind him; you knew his wounds would far surpass yours. Where you willingly chose to fall with him, he was cast out.

Once safe and sheltered from most of the elements, you took tender care of his broken wings and tore up the body.

As you stitched him up and wrapped up deeper wounds, you sat above him, crying, hoping he would pull through this.

As he woke from his stooper, he caressed your face gently as you held his hand there, pouring all your emotions out to him.

He reprimanded you for falling with him but, in the same breath, mentioned how happy he was to have someone so devoted by his side.

As he healed, you two built up hell and gave those who had received free will a purpose.

Even though he sometimes blamed himself, he was so happy to have you beside him, fixing hell up one step at a time.

Alastor

He was picky about who got to see him so vulnerable and weak; he was not about to let others know that he could be harmed in such a manner.

When you showed up outside the radio tower, panicking after watching him disappear after a fatal blow. He couldn't deny the happiness he felt in his fleeting moments.

As you laid him down and tore open his suit, you made quick work of the large wound across his chest that Adam gave him.

You were stoic and focused on ensuring that he emerged from this alive with only a scar to tell the tale.

Once you had finished and he was doing better health-wise, you finally snapped and broke down in front of him, explaining your worries and fears.

He gently pulled you into a hug, resting his head atop yours, reminding you that he was alive and reminding himself he would be a goner without you.

When you two arrived back at the hotel, relief was felt through most of the others; however, you were happy that Alastor finally let down his walls with someone, especially since that someone was you.

Vox

Vox had suffered another beating from Alastor, something you were far more used to than you cared to admit.

He never got hurt enough that it required intense medical attention, but he did get his pride slapped around most of the time.

You sat delicately on his lap while he held your waist so you could gently fix up his screen

You were never a techy person, but you learned over the years how to replace his wiring and screens when things got bad like this.

Once he was all patched up, you sighed and rested your head on his shoulder, allowing the day's weight to catch up with you.

Worrying that you were now growing tired of him, Vox asked what was so wrong, only for you to pour out your heart and concerns he may get really hurt one of these times.

Feeling your genuine confession, he smiled softly and kissed you, reminding you that he fights for you to be safe and work free in his tower, but he would make an effort to come home scratched up less often.

[mimicmimikyuwrites]

I Love You's - (W/ America, Russia, England, Canada) x GN!Reader

Summary: Little fluffy scenarios where some of my favorite nations tell a gn!reader "I love you" 💕

Contents/Possible Warnings: Lots of fluff, kinda angsty tho for a lot of them, hurt with comfort, gn!reader

America (Alfred F. Jones)

He never thought he'd fall in love. It wasn't something Alfred avoided, but it also wasn't something he ever sought out. He had accomplished a lot in the relatively short period he had been around, he was still young and had opportunities to chase, and with that, he never imagined he'd have the time for romance. Still, things happened and now you were here with him, and there wasn't a happier man in the entirety of the world. With you beside him, he couldn't ask for anything better.

You were beautiful, so beautiful; both inside and out. Your hair was soft, your eyes captivated him, you understood him entirely, you loved him! He could go on forever, gushing about his awesome partner. You were the definition of perfection to him, flawed or not. He was head over heels.

"Love attack!" He nearly shouted while you were watching a movie with him in the living room one night, cupping your face in his hands as he began to pepper it with kisses. It startled you, but you loved it. One thing you adored about him was how he never tried to hide his affections. He was in love, and he'd be damned if he didn't show it.

You giggled, lightly pushing on his chest as he kissed every part of your face he could, now laughing himself. He kissed your forehead, your now reddened cheeks, your nose, and your cheeks again. When he was done he pulled back, grinning at the sight of your flustered, but happy expression.

"You missed, silly," you smiled playfully, pulling him back in before kissing him sweetly, satisfied hums escaping you both. You loved him, and you made sure to convey that with every movement of your lips together.

"I love you," He said between kisses. "My honey, my love, my baby, my sweetheart, my everything." It was true, you were his everything. He didn't want to live fast anymore, jumping at every opportunity, not when his most important one was right in front of him, and had such kissable lips, too.

Russia (Ivan Braginsky)

It was a well-known fact to those who had ever visited that Russia's house was more than just cold. It was freezing, something which you still weren't used to, even after all the years you had spent living with him. It got even colder during the night, and blankets could only do so much.

Ivan always hated the cold, the connection between it and the isolation he had endured throughout his life unable to be undone. Things were different now, though. He had you with him, someone to warm his heart, especially during those frigid nights he had dreaded so much.

"Ivan," you called out to him from the bed, wrapped up in multiple thick blankets that seemed to do nothing to keep you from shivering. "Come to bed, дорогой" You spoke with a tired smile, the last word making him melt as it left your mouth. 'Darling,' you had called him in his native tongue. He was your darling.

As he slipped into your shared bed with you he wrapped his arms around you, holding you close, his eyes closed in relaxation and bliss as he nuzzled his face into your hair. You made him feel warm, and that's all he ever truly wanted out of life. Someone to love, and someone to love him back.

"я тебя люблю." He mumbled against you, smiling softly. "мое солнышко." You were his sunshine, a ray of light shining through despite the clouds. He moved his head out of your hair and leaned down, capturing your lips in a sweet kiss. "Promise me you'll never leave," he told you, caressing your cheek gently. To anyone else, that would've sounded like a demand, but to you it was a request for comfort.

"I'm not going anywhere," You reassured him, kissing his cheek. "I love you, Ivan. With all of my heart. я тебя люблю."

England (Arthur Kirkland)

Having done so much throughout his history, Arthur savored quiet moments, even if they were little ones. The moments when he wasn't busy, and the moments when he wasn't plagued with the harsh realities of the world. His favorite moments, however, involved you.

You were kinder than anyone else he had ever met in his centuries of being alive, a true angel. You were his everything, the love of his life, so much so that he wondered how he had gone so long without you. When you were with him he didn't feel so distant from everyone else; he felt wanted.

You were curled up next to him on the couch, your arms wrapped around him as you leaned your head against his shoulder, simply enjoying his company while a television show neither of you were paying much attention to played in the background.

The one bad thing about these quiet moments was the rare opportunity for his mind to drift into places, or more so memories, that he'd rather not think about. He had fought with so many people throughout his life, some of which he had cherished. In the end, everyone left him, sooner or later, a distance soon growing. Were you the next one to leave...? What if you two had an argument one day, and you decided you couldn't stand being around him anymore? What if he—

"Arthur," your voice reached his ears, tone gentle and soft. Then, your hand came forward to cup his face, carefully turning his head towards you. "You're overthinking again, love." You frowned, making an observation. "Do you want to talk about it?" He shook his head.

"No. It's nothing we haven't already discussed." He replied, smiling at you sadly. "It's my own insecurities, nothing you need to worry about, dear." With this, your frown grew before you leaned in, kissing him lovingly.

"I love you," He muttered against your lips, emerald green eyes looking into yours with an adoration reserved only for you. "I love you so much." He meant it with every part of his being. Even with his fears, deep down, he knew you wouldn't abandon him, because you loved him with every part of your being, too.

Canada (Matthew Williams)

He was used to being forgotten. Always the quiet one, he was easily overlooked, even by those closest to him. Honestly, he didn't know how he managed to start dating you, or get you to notice he was there. To him, he wasn't anything special, just maple leaves and the friend of a bear who barely knew who he was. He didn't deserve you.

"Matthew," You smiled at him one morning over breakfast. "I've been practicing my French recently, thought it'd be useful, y'know? Can I speak to you a bit and get your feedback? I'm not too good at it yet..."

He nodded, returning your smile. You were so smart, so clever, so cute. You were always trying to learn new things, especially when it came to him and his nation. You never forget about him, you were so sweet, so unique, and he was just... himself.

"Hmm..." You hummed in faux contemplation, acting like you were trying to remember what you were going to say. You knew exactly what was on your mind. "Why don't I start with a pretty common phrase? Je t'iame." He blushed at your words. You told him that every day without fail, but hearing it in French felt different somehow, more meaningful in a way.

"Y-You said it excellently." He stuttered out, heart racing as you looked into his amethyst eyes, a gleam of admiration for him in your own.

"Ooh! Let me try out another phrase, then," You grinned, leaning forward slightly over the table. "These ones are a bit more complicated. Tu es l’amour de ma vie. Tu es mon âme sœur," the words poured out from your lips, the sound like music to his ears. You said it perfectly, how long had you been practicing? You must've put in a lot of effort...

"Woah!" You gasped, standing up from your seat at the sight of small tears welling up in his eyes. You rushed over to him, holding his face gently in your hands as your thumbs wiped away his tears. "I didn't mean to make you cry—"

He sniffled, standing up to wrap you in a tight embrace. "I don't deserve you," He whispered, voice shaky. He was happy, so happy. He loved you, and he'd never stop. "Je t’aime de tout mon cœur," he told you with love, pressing a kiss to your forehead as he did so. "I love you with all my heart," he clarified with a small chuckle after you shot him a confused look.

"How do I say that, but back to you?" You questioned, tilting your head slightly in curiosity. Adorable, you were beyond adorable. He chuckled again, answering you only but kissing you lovingly. He'd teach you soon enough, but for now, he was focused on expressing his love for you in ways that involved less French.

[writingoddess1125]

Poly or just 3 some vibe swith shanks and Mihawk?? I just feel that power imbalance would be addictiveee

Oh This is what I live for Love! You got it!

MWAHAHAHAHHAHAH

Shanks X young!Reader(mid 20's) X Mihawk

Warning: Sexual Themes, Threesome vibes, Sex, Unprotected sex, Eiffel Tower ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Tag You're It

You stood there at the bar looking at your few regulars as you spaced out. It was a slow night, almost like every night. Your village was too small and too secluded to get any real traffic. If it wasn't for a few months ago it would have closed- not for a certain pirate crew then it would have defiently closed their doors.

Speaking of which- the door busted open with a fairly dramatic flare. As if summoned by your thoughts there stood the entirety of the Red Haired Pirates, cheeks already flushes with alcohol it seemed.

"Good Evening Mr. Shanks! Glad to see you back" You smile cheerfully at him, He would often come to the bar when he ran out of his monthly supply on his Island next door. Him and his crew were very nice, paired with the fact they always payed very well.

"Good Evening to you (Y/N)! Please bring out the best you have little one! It's a celebration!" It was no secret that Shanks had been eyeing you for the months he had been stopping by, How his eyes would linger on your form a bit more then most- How his gaze would track you as you moved through the bar.

"A celebration?" You asked innocently as he held up a wanted poster proudly. A dark brooding figure Stepping in behind him, looking a bit irritated to he there, even as his gaze settled on you.

"Yep! My Lad Luffy got his first bounty and is now a Pirate! Paired with my good Pal here Mihawk is here for a visit!"

"Well in that case I'll pull out the best!" You said cheerfully waving at your co-workers to bring our the large crates of rum and ale for them.

As the liquor was poured you saw Shanks and Mihawk quietly talking- Their eyes locked onto you as they stared at you, watching every move you did. Which made your cheeks heat up dramatically. After a few moments of this and the bar coming to life with loud music you ended up grabbing a drink as well.

This seemed to drawn Mihawk over, his form shadowing yours. "Is it wise for you to drink?" He cautioned a brow, making you feel a bit flustered by both his accent and eyes.

"It's fine, it's not like anyone here would hurt me" You say softly, Waving your hand dismissively. His lips curving to a slight smirk at this-

"I don't think hurting you is what they would have in mind" Oh your face was bright red now- especially with the purr in his tone and look in his eye-

"W-Well if they asked I wouldn't be opposed I'm sure-" You manage to squeak out, drawing his gaze in. Before he gestured you to follow him, which you obediently did. Returning to his seat next to Shanks he pulled you to his lap which made your face crimson- The red head smiling at the sight.

"Didn't know all I had to do was smile to bring you over finally" He teased, Gesturing to yourself seated on his peers lap. You took another sip of your drink and shyly shrugged

"As I say, ask and you shall receive Shanks. Number one rule here" You quip back which earns a noise from Mihawk- seemingly a chuckle.

"Well if that's the case. Me and my friend here, both would love to take you out for the evening, to get to know you better. But you'd have to choose my dear"

"I-I wouldn't be able to choose-" You admit shyly, Looking between the two of you. Shanks laughing loudly at this as he bit his lip.

"What about both of us?" He chimed, something in his eyes made tour stomach warm. Maybe it was the underlying danger or the arousal but yoh nodded.

"Well, I suppose it couldn't hurt- It's a celebration afterall" You blushed, drinking more of the rum in your glass. The alcohol making your head buzz and warmth filled your body.

Mihawk squeezed your thigh as you were still seated on his lap.

"Deplorable as usual-" Mihawk grumbled, but his gaze did fall to you as you sat there blushing in-between the two men. His golden eyes practically staring through your soul, reaching forward and taking a peice of your hair in his hands and messing with it- Like he was trying to decide to go through with it. Once your big beautiful eyes settled on his, he sighed almost defeatedly.

"But I suppose a bit of sharing wouldn't be the worse" He said softly. Shanks smiling widely as he heard this and gave a proud laugh. Patting Mihawk shoulder in joy.

Shanks was the first to stand, pulling you up to your feet. Mihawks hand on the small of your back and lead you out of the bar and towards the inn. Mihawk tossing down some berry and guided you up to the given room.

Author Note!: ⚠️ Final Warning ⚠️ Once you go past this line. THERE IS NO RETURN! ITS ABOUT TO GET INFERNO SPICY- 18+ ultra mature!

Shanks and Mihawk stood on either side of you. Shanks was the first one to kiss you, it was gentle at first sweet even. It wasn't till you felt a tug on your blouse that the sweet kiss was broke, feeling him pull off your blouse as you felt your pants fall down to the floor. Realizing Mihawk had taken the time to undo them, along with your bra as Shanks smiled and pulled down your underwear. Blushing you felt a push as you fell onto the bed behind you.

You were laid there on the soft comforters of the local Inns bed, Blushing as the warm lights of the lanterns barely lit the room. But you could make out the two men staring at you like you were fresh prey infront of two hungry carnivores.

"How shall we go about this Hawkeye? Maybe a good game of tag?" Shanks said with a wicked smiled, Mihawk smirking as his gaze never left you and nodded.

Mihawk too the left while Shanks moved forward climbing into the bed with a grin as he found himself between your legs.

"He can't help but put everything in his mouth Darling" Mihawk said calmly playing with your hair as you moaned helplessly against his chest, Watching your face contort and shift from Shanks pleasurable torture. You could feel Shanks smirk between your legs as his mouth wrapped around your clit and sucked hard, crying out in pleasure as Mihawk captured your lips in a deep kiss. Wine filled your senses as you accepted the kiss, feeling him hungry mouth dominate your own.

Pulling away as Shanks pulled your hips with his arm, bringing your core closer as he seemed too lost in his meal to be concerned with the lost kiss between you and Hawkeye-

At being pulled down your face sliding down Mihawk's chest and to his waist, Blushing deeply as you laid infront of the Warlords tending pants. Mihawk smirking at your reaction as he gestured for you to proceed, not needing a cue you carefully undid his pants. Blushing as his large cock bounces out enthusiastically- opening your lips you took all of him in, Blushing at the feeling as he groaned above you.

You moaned as you bobbed your head up and down, the feeling of Shanks driving you to your upcoming orgasm, your legs starting to shake at Shanks talented mouth before he suddently pulled away. Chuckling at the whine you gave at the sensation even while Mihawk chuckled at you as well.

"Don't worry love~ I got something better~" You heard Shanks say sweetly. A shuffling of fallen clothes fell behind you as you felt Shanks hand rest on your hip and pulling you up to your knees while you chest still laid on the mattress before Mihawk.

Your thighs shake as you felt every inch of him slide into you, combined with still too high from his mouth earlier was just enough to cum right as he bottomed out. Moaning loudly against Mihawk cock and shaking.

"Aww~ She came just from me entering. So cute~" the Red head teased, making Mihawk even chuckle. Without time to even settle through your bliss you felt Ahanks hips start to move. Like a tidal wave, the shocked of ecstacy rushed through your body.

Shank hips started to sputter against you, still shaking from your previous orgasm that had your nerves on fire.

"You know I don't care for a mess Red Hair-" Mihawk grunted out, his pace quickening on your lips as you felt him hit the back of your throat, tears rolling down your cheeks as you felt Mihawk tughten his hold on your hair, pulling your lips as far down his member as possible as he came. Heat running down your throat as you felt Shanks pull out of you at the same time and spill on your back.

"Well done Darling~" Mihawk praised as he pulled himself from your mouth, smiling at the sight of you. Tears down your cheeks, lips red and bruised and panting. He pulled you up once more, this time placing you against Shanks chest.

"Very nicely done~" Shanks purred out, praising you for your skills. You only gave a bubbling moan at the sweet praise and Mihawk hands kneading your chest, drawing out moans sweet moans from you. Feeling Mihawk place kisses down your neck in reward for your moans.

"Think you can last one more round for us Sweetheart?~" Shanks sweetly asked, nodding softly even if you mind was fuzzy from your pleasure.

It felt like a blur but suddently you where on your back, Mihawk in turn sliding into you. Your back arching at the sensation as you gasped, he was bigger- Somehow or it was just how sensitive you were. As you laid there gasping you felt Shank touch your shoulder looking up as you saw his already hardened member before your lips, accepting him you felt him thrust into your mouth.

You felt your body bounce with each powerful thrust, sending Shank's cock deeper past your bruised lips. Another hard orgasm already building in your stomach as you felt Mihawk's relentless hips slam against your form,

A muffled cry left your sore throat as you felt warmth flood your mouth and core, spots scattered in your vision as you heard the muffled pants and groans of the two above you.

Mihawk was the first to pull out of you, his large hands securing you as Shanks did the same making cold air filling your lungs. Both men working gently to clean you up, whispering praise at you as they did so. Mihawk laying you down first on the cleanest part of the bed and covering your tired form in a blanket. You felt your eyes close, too tired to open them again as sleep was already starting to take over your form.

"We must share her once again" Shanks whispered, pushing some of your hair from your face. Carefully holding your waist with his hand. You could feel Mihawk nod in agreement as he settled you on his broad chest.

"I can't disagree with that" Mihawk whispered before sleep finally claimed you.

[a-confused-spoon]

Jinx's haircut: how Powder and Ekko's story comes full circle

Hi! So, it appears Jinx will be cutting her hair short in season 2 (which is cool as fuck), and I’ve been seeing a lot of discussion on it, so I wanted to share my two cents 😊

I might refer to Jinx and Powder as if they are different ideantities, but I'm aware that's not how that works; it's just an easier way to express myself. Also english isn't my first language, so apologies for any possible wiritng mistake (this is a bit of a mess 😅)

* deep breath in *

As it has already been pointed out, this choice must have a deeper reason other than esthetic (I've been seeing the phrase "hair holds memories" used a lot), and what's even more interesting is that her new look resembles a lot how she used to look like as a kid; a bit bizarre, given how the entirety of season 1 showed us how Powder and Jinx's coexistence only brings the girl pain. As a matter of fact, the finale makes it clear to us that even she sees these two sides of herself as mutually exclusive.

So why and how exactly would this happen now?

What I keep going back to is the idea that maybe, just maybe, this has to do with her possibly "taking the lead" in Zaun; whether she actively becomes a leader or if she just "leads by example" (therefore passively), it doesn't change the fact that for better or worse she will be depicted as a leading revolutionary figure.

And fair enough: she singlehandedly killed half of the Council, the people who hold decisional power and have contributed to the misery on the other side of the river. After Vender's failed attempt on the bridge and Silco's focus on his own business dealings with Piltover among everything else he did, Jinx's attack on the city - something she does to ultimately solidify her identity as Jinx - opens a door that the Undercity was waiting to be opened for decades.

Here's the thing:

Being Jinx doesn't just mean acting on unbridled rage and being a menace to society; it means being feared by most, if not all, with the only possible exceptions being those who also accepted their inner monster. To put it in Singed's words, "If you take this path, they will despise you".

Being Jinx fundamentally implies loneliness.

Silco was consistently reminding her this: "I am your family; everyone else betrays us" / "Everyone betrays us Jinx! Vander! Her! They will never understand, it's only us".

In the official clip 'Enemy of my enemy' we find out that he only saw her cry twice, the two scenes we also witness as an audience, meaning he didn't see her cry once during the timeskip, and I'm sure it's safe to say that she most definitely did cry a lot given how she goes from episode 3 Powder (scared, couldn't grasp the concept of killing someone, heartbroken by the nickname jinx) to episode 4 Powder (a beast, kills in cold blood, has taken Jinx as her actual name)... it must've been an ugly transition, and it definitely didn't happen overnight; if Silco, who was the closest person she had all that time, didn't see it, then I think it speaks a lot on how alone Jinx really was in her darkest times.

For all the love he had for her, he reinforced this idea of isolation as an unescapable consequence of the right path, and I think this is also reflected in the lair that (supposedly) he found for her, especially when you compare it to the Firelights’ one:

The Firelights (this is important for later) are all about community and sharing joy as well as struggle and pain; they live in a place of healing, filled with life, without a roof so the sunlight can reach them during the day, and at nights living bugs that shine a light of their own fill up the hideout.

Jinx's place is diametrically opposed to this: it’s dark and looks cold, it's completely made of metal, the roof’s blocking any natural light and it hangs above an abyss with no bottom to be seen; the only company she consistently has are the puppets of her dead brothers and the only living thing that knows his way in is the only one that can understand, the only one she can rely on - aka Silco himself.

However, as Jinx herself knows, this may have worked for him, but it wasn't working for her for the longest time: she never stopped yearning for affection, love, friendship- that part of her never really went away; it was only being suppressed, suffocated, maybe unintentionally, and I strongly believe that it only worsen her trauma, and it's one of the things that made her spiral so bad into her depression, to the point of hallucinating.

I think that Silco's line in the baptism scene is particularly relevant here: "You need to let Powder die, so the fear of pain will no longer control you", where the fear of pain would refer to the fear of being on her own, of always failing and disappointing others, of being weak and never satisfying the desires, expectations, hopes that Powder carried within her to be “a valuable member of the team”.

If she lets Powder die (which again, she does in the final episode of season 1), this is no longer a problem: if she doesn't do teams, because teams don't want a jinx to begin with, that fear can't get to her; if she's a solo player, a self-sufficient loose cannon, she won't need to rely on anyone but herself because she's strong on her own and does not need the support of others.

If her power lays in the monster she is, the one everyone condemns her for being, then that childhood wish of hers just isn't a realistic option.

...but then this happens.

We know from the teaser trailer that in the operation Caitlyn's leading, 'finding Jinx' and 'neutralize any agent still loyal to Silco' are separate objectives. Which makes sense, since as far as they know Silco was the leader of a group of people, and now that he's gone Jinx is an individual under her own agency and her own agency alone. If initially she fights by herself, for herself because she can and fuck Piltover, then it all falls in line with what I stated so far.

But then we hear Sevika, who has hated Jinx's guts and who Jinx has hated back since day one, telling her to get the people together, to unite the Undercity as one because she can do that. Mind you, the girl has lived in Zaun all her life, she knows damn well that the end of Piltover is something the entire Undercity has been waiting for (“Imagine what the whole of the Lances could do!” from episode 2); yet despite this she needs to be openly told what is going on, that she’s not sizing the opportunity she’s created. She isn't, cause... her? Leading? A group of people? No. Not after the last time she tried to help, and most importantly, not after everything she learned under Silco.

Jinx can't fathom the idea of herself as a part of a part of a team. How can she? She literally just came to terms with isolation as ever present- and now, for some reason, the people of the city, who always either ran away from her or wanted her gone, are dying their hair blue in her image, trusting her, following her, painting murals of her as the bringer of revolution.

She isn't taking power forcibly like Silco did; she's just doing her thing, her Jinx thing, and Zaun, on its own, is choosing her as the leading figure.

Imagine how frustrating it must be for Jinx to look back and realize that Silco, her father- who has loved her, forgiven her, raised her, called her perfect, defended her, was there for her, saved her, guided her- was wrong, and put her in a condition of never ending existential pain when she could’ve had it differently the entire time; imagine how confusing it must be for her to look back and realize that it never mattered whether or not others understood her, 'cause she wasn't as unlovable or unforgivable as she thought herself to be in the first place, that Silco and Vi were never her only options.

Imagine how painful it must be for her to look back and realize that for all this time she could’ve had friends and be accepted and be trusted and rely on others because she never HAD to be alone.

...keeping this in mind, let's talk about Ekko and the missing flashback from episode 7 for a moment.

Admittedly we don’t have a lot of information, other than it took place not too long after the events of episode 3 (then again, to be fair, we don’t know a lot about their relationship as enemies as well: it’s all between the lines; I surely have my own opinions of how they feel about each other being on the enemy side, but I don’t believe it’s super relevant here). What’s for sure about this flashback is that it was a defining moment in both Ekko and Powder’s journey, especially for the latter. Someone surely died, and it 100% was Powder’s fault. It could be both the result of her very first crisis or her first intentional murder; in both cases it results in her deciding for herself to align with Silco as opposed to her best friend.

The way I like to see it is that, since the trauma was still very fresh, she might have been too scared of the idea of fighting alongside others after what happened last time, and she pushed herself to kill someone on purpose just to push Ekko away and prove a point (Silco’s point). I love the idea of the tragic irony of Ekko being the one person Powder managed to really save, and Powder being the one person Ekko couldn’t.

Personal headcanons aside though, the last part is the most important one here: Ekko couldn’t save Powder from Silco, and by extension everything he represents.

I’d like to point out that one of the most tragic aspects of the two becoming enemies (to me) is that, throughout those years, they reciprocally were the only living person the other shared a past with (well, Vi too, but she was in prison the entire time).

Silco not only takes over by force, he also marks as his all the places of said past: the Last Drop, Vi and Powder’s house… one line that always stuck with me from episode 7 is when Ekko tells Vi “All that’s left is Jinx, and she belongs to Silco”.

Not with Silco; to Silco. As if she too a piece of the past he turned into his property.

It’s like he understands that while yes, Powder made the decision by herself, that she wants to stay with Silco, he also knows that the man is the one to blame for... well, all of it; the kid was there when Silco showed up unprovoked at Benzo’s place, he knows things went downhill from there.

Ekko knows that he is the bigger problem and the bigger enemy. Even Vi, without knowing a thing about the past few years, can tell Silco put some shit into her sister’s head; Ekko can probably guess the same, difference being that Ekko has the responsibility of keeping other people safe, and he can’t risk it all for someone that, while possibly manipulated, ultimately isn’t collaborative. Ekko can’t jeopardize all he’s built and done for his former best friend, no matter how much it hurts him to be her enemy.

Back to season 2.

Like the entire fandom has already pointed out, there’s a 99.9% chance there will be an alliance between them and Jinx, especially when looking at Ekko’s new outfit.

Of course, this will not be immediate: my guess is that while Jinx works alone at the very start Ekko will be with Heimerdinger and following the arrest of the Firelights we see in the trailer maybe there’s a split. And even after Jinx takes charge so to speak, and possibly frees them, among others, from Stillwater, it’s possible there will be (and there should be) stages in the alliance: initial distrust, potential fight within the community- like yeah, let’s not forget what Jinx did to these people.

Even if they do go ahead with it, it is probably out of necessity more than anything else, with not one but two military forces against the whole of the Underground. It’s not like they’d be the most ecstatic faction about it, and the same goes for Ekko, which is why the new look will probably come in later.

But exactly like he could see Powder for a brief second on the bridge clearly enough for him to stop himself from beating her, he will, most definitely, see her again through Jinx's inner turmoil... that, and she also can’t keep her shit together when it comes to what she's feeling, the girl really is an open book.

And yeah, the situation would be pretty emotionally disorienting: she's being as Jinx as ever, but people like her now, which is something she used to want as Powder, who is supposed to be dead, and they're willingly following her like they willingly followed Vander and there's murals of her with him, though she's pursuing what aligns more with Silco's dream, but also turns out Silco was wrong about Powder, who might still be alive deep down- the whole thing is a big big mess.

Despite everything that I said about him, it’s not like Jinx would start to resent Silco. She could never, not after his last words to her. They mean the world to her, he means too much to her, and let’s not forget she probably hear his voice now too, along Mylo’s and Claggor’s; it might even be a calming voice to her, one she’s happy to hear even if she knows he’s not real… which makes it all worse and more painful to deal with.

In this scene from the trailer, it seems like Ekko’s talking to her (some have pointed out the blue hair out of focus). Since this is still the look in season, at this point in time Ekko (and the rest of the Firelights) are not truly committed to this alliance with Jinx, and vice versa, Jinx is still figuring out how to deal with all this unexpected appreciation.

If there’s one thing we’ve learned about Jinx’s way of dealing with inner conflicts, especially ones that deal with the memories of the past, is that it often leads to disaster. This is a bit of a long shot, but what if the reason Ekko’s so beat up Is because she unintentionally sabotaged one of their own attacks on Piltover? Or perhaps they were caught up in a tough situation because of something she did or didn’t do? My point is that if he really is talking with her while in this condition, she probably is in a similar one.

Regardless, they are on the same side, and they are having a conversation. This is very likely the first time they reach out for each other since the day she chose to not go with him.

And I think it’s believable that of all the people she now has beside her, she’d talk to Ekko: he has this leader stuff already figured out. He has and still is taking care of people and keeping them safe better than she ever will, and on top of that, he still is the only one in Zaun (again, aside from Vi) who has known her since before she was Jinx, and he spared her on the bridge. He’s the perfect person to open up to.

And, get this, not only Ekko understands the pressure of taking the lead: he knows what it means to look back at someone you were fond of and feeling the pain of being wronged by them. He knows what it’s like to look back at old memories of someone you trusted and wonder if all those moments together really were what you thought they were, he knows what it’s like to wish it could all go back like it was, just so that candid version of them you have in your mind can still be true, present and untainted by the ugliness that now ruins all those precious moments.

He knows, 'cause he went through it with her... and now he can finally reach her.

Ekko may have not been able to save her from Silco then, but he can save her from Silco now.

And since he has built a community that grieved together, went through pain and joy together, he simply does what he’s always done with the Firelights. Sharing.

He tells with her what has worked for him: “Sometimes, taking a leap forward means leaving a few things behind”- in the Franch dub he says “leaving a part of oneself behind”- meaning it doesn’t have to be all or nothing: she has the power to choose what to kiss goodbye and what can stay…

…and then she cuts her hair.

I think it’s important to note how these two moments are very similar in setting. I kid you not, the first time I watched the trailer I was convinced this was a scene where Jinx was burning Silco’s body after she killed him- which frankly could still be the case. I’ve also seen discussions being made for the little girl we see in the trailer being burned here, or Sevika, but I don’t think it’s either. Jinx is completely desensitized to death, even when Silco died her makeup isn’t this ruined. My guess is that this is something much deeper:

Jinx never properly grieved the past. Ever. So, maybe, she’s burning the part of herself she’s leaving behind. The hair she cut.

The hair Silco used to braid for her.

These two scenes parallel each other because “nothing ever stays dead”, but Silco must stay dead, for her own sake. For her own happiness: she is leaving him behind for good.

Only after this moment we get the new look for Ekko: he can work with this new Jinx, the one that now knows she can work within a team, even to the point of committing to the outfit (lol).

If in season 1 Jinx accepted her identity as it was defined by Silco, in season 2 she's re-inventing it under her own conditions: she gets to choose what "being Jinx" may or may not include. And it will always include a little bit of Powder.

Thanks for reading! 💚💙

[blossomthepinkbunny]

Talking about Adam and the villians of HB

Adam is such a dissapointing villain for Hazbin Hotel that absolutely doesn't make use of the great opportunities they had for the bad guy of this project. Like, what is Adam? A sexual, irrational, rockstar asshole who kills demons for fun and is shown to be completely idiotic and unable to make any good point for his actions. And that sucks.

Atleast to me, them making Adam an irredeemable asshole type just seems like the show acknowledging that they can't take any actual feedback on Charlies idea. He is a strawman who never really gets to be anything else until his final moments, when they want you to care about his fight. The show doesn't want you to actually think critical about what Charlie has planned it just wants you to think she is right, by making you hate Adam, by making his side actively carry out genocide. The fact that a show all about revealing that people have layers and presenting seemingly morally grey areas in them has a villian who is completely one note and just evil and irrational because the show needs him to be is not great.

There are actual things that can be criticized about the Hotel and the idea of redeeming sinners, but Adam can't call any of these out because then Charlie would have to defend herself, which she can't do and then you would realize that the writers couldn't think of arguments for why she is right. And then Charlie would come off as not as great as they want you to think she is.

What if he had called out the fact that genuinely no demon seems to give a shit about being a better person. We don't get a definitive time for how long Charlie has been working on the Hotel but we can assume that it has been atleast a little longer. We see her advertise her idea on the news in the pilot and the Hotel makes an advertisement in the first episode, so we know that it's pretty open information that a place where demons can redeem themselves exist. Yet in the entirety of the pilot, season one and however much time lays between the two, only two sinners came to the hotel to change (im not counting staff members because they are there to work, not to be redeemed).

Angel Dust and Sir Pentious are the only ones who came to stay, which either means that just no other sinner cares to be better or that Charlie is not taken seriously and that her hotel is viewed as stupid in concept alone. And you have to remember that even these two didn't initially join because they genuinely wanted to change.

Angel just decided to stay because it was a cheap place to live where he wouldn't have to see Val. And while Pentious does decide he wants to be better, we don't know if he would have even done that, had it not been for the agreement he made with Vox (which made him come to the hotel with bad intentions in the first place).

Why doesn't Adam get to point out that sending Sinners to heaven might be a bad idea when there are probably people that they hurt or may have even killed up there. Like, Angel Dust was in the Mafia and you can assume that he has quite the killcount and it's very possible that some of his victims are in heaven. That goes for every other demon too, they're down there for a reason. And while sometimes that reason might be something stupid or irrelevant, just giving every demon the benefit of the doubt and a chance to get to heaven (in theory) seems pretty irresponsible.

That is also completely ignoring the fact that Charlie's method has no proof of even working. Seemingly in the entirety of hell existing no sinner has ever redeemed themselves and went to heaven until Sir Pentious, which was mostly an accident as well.

I'm not saying Adam had to be likeable or relatable, but it's pretty obvious that they made him so hateable just because. He can't just be an obnoxious, sexist asshole because that's not blatantly evil enough apparently. He also has to commit genocide for no reason other than that he enjoys it. Again, im not saying his genocide should be excusable, but he should have a reason that isn't presented as him just doing it for fun because hes a jackass (he should have a reason that would make what he is doing okay in his own eyes where the viewer could understand how he views the world without having to agree necessarily).

Writing evil characters who are purely bad because they just are can work. But in my opinion that shouldn't be the main villian, especially not in a show where the central idea is supposed to be discussing morality and moral greyness.

Cioccolata from Jjba is a villian where this works in my opinion. He is just evil and Araki really plays that up. He isn't just a crazy doctor type who violently experiments on people for fun, his backstory also shows that he has been doing this since he was 14 and started with driving elders to suicide. And also he films everything he does because he just likes watching people suffer. Cioccolata really is just irredeemably crazy and sadistic but it works for him because he is just a side antagonist and therefore doesn't have the burden of playing as a direct counter to our main protagonist and because for all his immoral actions he still has philosophy behind that. A fucked up philosophy but an understandable (not excusable) one nonetheless. He explaines that in his eyes people can only experience true happiness from two situations. Either when your own despair is replaced with hope, or when one watches other people fall into despair themselves. In his eyes, the more people he watches die, the more he understands the human race and the stronger he gets, which leads into another aspect of his philosophy, which is that the strong have have the right and responsibility to rule over the weak. That is why I think he works.

We actually get some insight into Adams deeper character motivation in his last moments. When he gets upset that the demons aren't just falling at his feet, worshipping him, even though he is the original man all life came from. And that would be a good idea to expand on, that Adam has this intense sense of entitlement that leads him to despise the demons because he doesn't have power over them, when he feels like he should. And because a crowd of people that don't worship him, feels threatening to him, he would want them gone as to not possibly risk his position of power with their ideas.

That could be the reason for why he despises Charlie, because she is a demon who makes her own plans to save her people, which would mean they could start to follow her and work with her, rather than idolizing him. Something like that would work so well for his character and would fit this saviour attitude that some religious people have when "helping" atheists by recommending that they should be religious to make all their problems dissapear or something (no shade to people who genuinely find peace and safety in their religion I think that's actually great but it's not a solution for everybody). The last moments he has give great insight into what his character could've been, had they focused on this, rather than always just having him say how much he enjoys killing demons for no reason.

And in the song he has he also nearly approaches giving another possible reason for his actions (that being that he just doesn't care because demons already had their chance to be good, didn't choose that and now don't deserve a second chance), but that is also never expanded on and is pretty much ignored throughout the season.

Also I find it interesting that Adam has to be completely and irredeemably evil, hated by everyone, while Lucifer gets away with just letting the people he is supposed to rule die like it's nothing. Lucifer didn't to anything to stop the exterminations, he didn't contact his daughter in quite some time and actively mocks her idea when first meeting her after these months of not giving a shit for her or what she does (her idea that is supposed to save his people from literal death btw).

We see him easily finish Adam off in the finale which begs the question for why he just never cared to do anything before. But it's fine because he's just so silly and goofy and actually cares a lot for Charlie say's the show. That is why he gets to be redeemed in the same episode he appeared in for the first time and no one is allowed to question him because then you're just not nice and understanding.

Lucifer didn't have to like sinners. I think his approach of basically leaving the sinners to their own devices is pretty interesting. But HH wants you to hate Adam and like Lucifer without acknowledging that people who just watch bad stuff being done without doing anything about it are also shitty. And for Lucifer it seems extra shitty because we see he can literally just defeat Adam and he just didn't do anything for this whole time.

Helluva Boss has this problem too where it picks characters it wants you to like and if you don't like them then you're just wrong. And therefore no villian gets to call these characters out without being shown to be either stupid, irrational or mean.

Striker was genuinely interesting and cool when he first appeared. He was an antagonist who had understandable goals that tied in well with the trajectory of the story. The classism in hell's society is a pretty relevant theme for HB. We see that Blitzø has to sleep with Stolas to be able to even do his job and earn a living, we see Imps just being tossed around and abused and hear Stolas say stuff like "impish little plaything" to Blitzø. Striker wanting to take the demons of high rank down to make hell better for the Imps by ending classism made sense and was an interesting take to see. Especially since at that point the show didn't insist on Stolas being this misunderstood good guy who just cares soo much for Blitzø, there was a sense of suspense maybe to watch wether or not Blitzø will go along with Striker or if this interaction might influence how he views his clearly predatory "relationship" with Stolas.

But all of that got thrown out the window because in s2 we just can't have people criticise Stolas, since actually acknowledging the fact that he benefited and actively made use of hells classist system would mean that we wouldn't see him as a poor confused bean anymore and that one might actually think of some of the pretty bad implications the Stolitz relationship has. So now Striker is a completely obvious, self obsessed bad guy who loves himself so much that he monologues about how great he feels when torturing Stolas instead of just killing him while they also gave him a weird gimmick where he doesn't like it when someone makes a sexual remark and gets so upset that he drags out Stolas' killing and gets defeated by Millie and Moxxie because of it (the same guy was established as a great assassin in another episode).

They also removed all the backbone to his ideology. He still talks about Stolas diminishing Imps in "Western Engery" but it lacks any point because they have gone so far with woobifying Stolas that he is presented as sympathetic and Striker as bigoted. Striker also acts like he can't kill Stolas because Stella called off the assassination on him. I get him being upset that he won't get his money for the kill but he still has very clear reasons for why he would want Stolas dead regardless (atleast he had when he was still a cool character). It's not like suddenly not being hired anymore would make a big change for him.

Killing Stolas could have consequences because Stolas is royalty, but these consequences always existed for him even while Stella was requesting the assassination. Stella would obviously not want others to know that she is reponsible for Stolas dying (then again we don't know if that would even matter since demons generally don't care about killing others until it's plot relevant) and the point of an assassin is that people are killed in a way that can't be tracked back to someone, so Striker should also not face issues, especially since he is apparently a really good and threatening assassin.

Striker was interesting until the show decided it liked Stolas too much for people to call him out and be presented as reasonable. Stella was turned into just an abusive, whiny and stupid bitch who just hates Stolas and wants his money instead of acknowledging that she pretty much has the same backstory as Stolas, who we are constantly told to feel bad for because of his childhood (arranged marriage, forced to have a child and a set-up relationship neither of them wanted).

Verosika is really not relevant but usually also falls into the "bitchy and just rude" category because she doesn't like Blitzø (it's not as bad for her as it is with Stella but still). Asmodeus and Fizzarolli where really mean and exposed and embarrassed Stolas and Blitzø publicly. But the next time we see Asmodeus interact with Stolas he is just chill with him? Why? Blitzøs and Fizzarollis relationship was atleast handled in a way and we see him act rude towards Blitzø until they make up. But it still followes the theme of people who dislike Stolas and Blitzø either changing their mind or just being shown to be horrible to make their opinion seem invalid (also notice how these male characters in the story get to be forgiven for how they acted and show different sides to their character while the women are reduced to being bitchy).

Barbie Wire was also handled soo bad. She only appears in the last few minutes of her début episode and never gets to talk about specifically why she doesn't want to have contact with Blitzø in the first place. The focus is mostly on how hurt he is by the fact his Sister wants nothing to do with him, even after he worked soo hard to find her and just wanted to make things right with her soo bad. They also basically made her a groomer which just doesn't help her come off as reasonable at all.

For a show that wants it's main characters to do bad stuff and have to deal with being called out for that it surely doesn't like people actually calling them out.

The double standards applied to the villians as opposed to the "good guys" are also just amazing. Like Millie and Moxxie can complain about Chaz being a bad partner in hindsight, but when Verosika talks about Blitzø being selfish in their relationship it's all about how he feels. Loona literally throwing stuff at Blitzø, hurting him just because he dared to carefully point out a true fact about her behaviour is played for laughs, but Stella abusing Stolas is super duper evil and we all hate her now (not saying it isn't bad but the show shouldn't pick and choose who is funny when abusive and who is evil when abusive). The I.M.P taking out random people because they were paid to is fine, but Striker attacking Stolas after being hired is bad just because he also happens to have a (understandable) motiv for why he would want to do it regardless of his job and because Stolas just so happens to be a main character. Blitzø and Loona commenting on Moxxies weight is funny, but when Mammon remarks that Fizzarolli gained a few pounds he is just bad.

That's just my opinion on some of the antagonists in HH and HB. Mammon is pretty much the only villian I really care for in both shows (also Stella and Striker before they got ruined). I mainly think antagonist are either really underused (Vox, Velvette, Verosika) or were just incredibly mishandled (Adam, Striker, Stella). Part of this post was just an excuse to talk about Jjba tho, which I always love.

[ficsilike-reblogged]

Invisible Smoke - Three

Summary: There is something going on with Jake’s favorite mechanic. And he finally gets some answers.

Pairing: Jake “Hangman” Seresin/F!Reader Word Count: 9k ABSOLUTELY NO MINORS ALLOWED

A/N: I apologize for the delay and thank you all so much for the love on the last chapter. Life has been a little overwhelming lately. Work has been hectic and I had a close family member pass away. I am hoping to come up for air soon. Thank you for your patience. And I do feel the need to reiterate that I DO NOT keep a tag list. Sorry!

Warnings: Naval inaccuracies, themes of stalking, cursing, mentions of bodily harm/injury, domestic abuse, and unhealthy coping mechanisms.

What could you possibly say? The truth was out of the question, at least the entirety of it was. You couldn't and wouldn’t drag him into this more than he already was. Jake deserved better than being wrapped up in your mess. “I got caught up in something above my paygrade a few years ago. Thought I had left it in the past. I’ll take care of it.” You took the Polaroid from his hand and threw it into the footwell in front of you before making sure to press your shoe over it.

Jake was quiet as he started your car and pulled out of the lot, turning toward the direction of your little bungalow. Maybe you should have been surprised he knew the way—he’d only come over with the rest of the Daggers twice and Bradley had been driving—but for some reason it just made sense. Of course Jake would know. His jaw was shut tight, you could see the tendons working as his teeth ground together. But just as quickly as you noticed it, he relaxed. But he didn’t move to turn the radio to a different station or raise the volume. He just kept driving.

The rollercoaster of emotions you’d just endured had you sagging in your seat. While your tears had slowed to a leaky trickle, they didn’t stop. And you wanted to scream, to rage at the cruelty of it all, but mostly what you wanted to do was crawl into bed after making sure your door and windows were locked.

He’d ruined your night. He had somehow found out you were going to the Hard Deck and had purposefully planted that picture. You were almost surprised that he hadn’t slashed your tires when he had the chance, too.

But it mattered little when Jake pulled into your driveway and handed you your keys after shutting off your car. He followed you up to the small, stone stoop and waited until you waved him in to step inside. You felt his eyes on you as you turned the locks on your door and then double-checked the one on the handle before you wiped at your face. Mascara and foundation smeared against your hand and you grimaced as you noticed it. Fantastic.

“Do you want a drink or something? I’m going to call you an Uber but before then? I have tea, water, and soda I know you won’t drink. I don’t keep alcohol in the house, sorry.” You were rambling, you knew that. But did you stop? No. “I can also order something for delivery, if you want.” You sniffled and tried to resist the urge to wipe at your face again.

Jake’s shoulders rolled as if he were trying to shake off a bug before he shook his head. “Why don’t you go get ready for bed, Punch? I’ll wait out here.”

That sounded like he was staying. And, really, you knew you should be shoving him out the door and into an Uber you knew would take him back to his car and far away from you and the disaster that was your life. But you still nodded, trying to ignore how you liked knowing he’d just be in the living room, waiting. “Feel free to snoop,” you said, retreating down the hall.

“I’m not going to snoop!”

“Yes, you are.”

**

And then, as soon as Jake heard your bedroom door close, he started to snoop. He did have your permission anyway and that half-assed answer you gave him wasn’t sitting right in his gut. Your little house was neat, if not in need of a bit of dusting. Art prints in soft greens and light yellows were hung in straight lines with personal photographs, in smaller silver frames, dotted between. A bookshelf took up an entire wall and was organized by last name…except for the bottom shelf that was mostly empty with just a small stack of lilac spines and silver lettering. Jake bent to get a better look but paused, spotting two large but thin frames tucked behind the bookcase. He tugged one out and saw that it was your undergraduate degree from some university up the coast. The next frame held your Masters Degree. Both were covered in dust and forgotten about. Almost like you had purposefully shoved them away. Carefully, Jake put them back and tried not to think about why you wouldn’t want them displayed, and instead grabbed one of the lilac books. It didn’t have a traditional cover, just the title: Sunlight Filtered Through Champagne. Below it was a small sticker with “ARC” typed out in bold white letters. Turning the book to look at its spine, the author’s name now accompanied the title: Georgia Torrance. There was a small note sticking out of the top and Jake slowly pulled it out to look at. Thought you may want it in your hands! Can’t wait to see what you come up with next! What did that mean?

When he heard your door open again, he was quick to put the note and book back and stand straight, trying to make it look like he was just looking at the thriller paperbacks on the shelf at his eyeline. It looked like you had a grading system on the shelf, too, scribbled on a small post-it note, denoting happy endings and not-so-happy endings. There was also a note to donate all of the not-so-happy ending books.

It was like you needed hope that a bad situation could end on a good note. And then there were all the locks on your door. The handle of a baseball bat was sticking out from under your little couch. Your curtains were not open when you arrived. You couldn’t read thrillers that ended badly because you were living in a fucked up one yourself, weren’t you?

“I got caught up in something above my paygrade.”

The words didn’t sit right with him. This wasn’t some sort of government cover up. This wasn’t a case of you seeing something you shouldn’t have. The note had been too familiar and the photo had been too intimate.

“You look like you’re trying to think,” you said.

Jake turned and almost swallowed his tongue as he looked at you. You’d switched out your sundress for tiny shorts and socks that went up to your thighs. A baggy Navy t-shirt nearly covered your shorts. You looked so soft, so comfortable even with your eyes still a little swollen from your earlier tears. And it twisted at something warm behind his ribs.

“Careful, you might pull something if you try too hard.” The insult was lacking its usual heat but Jake hardly noticed. Something else had gained his attention. A large gnarled scar was peeking out from under your shorts on your left leg. It reached halfway down your thigh and Jake couldn’t see how high up it went. Whatever had happened, it looked like it had hurt immensely. Then he remembered how the slits in your dresses were always on your right side. Your shorts, while tight, always reached your knees. You had been hiding it.

Who had hurt you?

He must have been staring too long because you angled your body away from him and cleared your throat. “I’m gonna call you an Uber. Sorry for my freak out earlier. You coulda been home and asleep by now. Or picking up someone at the Hard Deck. God, I really fucked up your night.”

You were rambling again. And maybe Jake would have found it endearing in any other circumstance but not when you were twisting your hands into the excess fabric of your shirt and shuffling away from him to grab your phone.

Slowly, as to not startle you, Jake reached out and gently took the phone from your hands and set it on the couch cushion. Your face scrunched with your confusion and the divot between your eyebrows only deepened when Jake set his hands on your shoulders. “You gonna tell me what actually happened?”

Your features shifted and shuttered, falling into the casual annoyance you usually wore around him. “I told you-”

“Yeah, you told me something. Now tell me the truth. I was in that car with you tonight, Punch. I saw how scared you were. A picture had you just as scared as nearly getting run off the highway. Tell me what is going on, please.”

Your jaw clenched and you wiggled out from under Jake’s grip. “So you’re calling me a liar now?”

“No! I just-”

“I’m sorry you got pulled into this, okay? I am. I never should have brought you to the party. You never should’ve been in the car.”

You weren’t getting it. He needed you to understand. “I’m glad I was with you! I’m glad you had me with you—but you can’t just tell me that you have it handled or brush it off because-”

“I’m not brushing anything off!” You snarled. “Stop trying to play hero!”

It may have been easier if you had just slapped him. Was that how you saw him? “I’m not playing at anything. But I can’t help you if you won’t let me try.”

The glint in your eyes was near murderous. Jake had only ever seen you look like this once before and it had been when some asshole had yanked on Penny’s arm at the Hard Deck. “Just stop! I-”

“I know something is going on. You can’t convince me otherwise, all right? My mama always said that if you smell smoke, it’s ‘cause there’s a fire.”

You wiped a hand over your eyes and Jake hated how he noticed your chin wobbling. “Your stupid southern colloquialisms do not apply to this situation. There is no smoke!”

Jake stepped forward again and peeled your hand away from your face, sighing as he saw fresh tears lining your lashes. He never wanted to make you cry. Not ever. “There is smoke. And I want to help you. Let me help you.”

You sniffled and looked away from him again but didn’t pull your hands out of his grip. “I don’t fucking understand this metaphor. A-and I don’t want to tell you.”

The words cracked in your throat and Jake only squeezed at your hands. He was here for you. Couldn’t you see that?

“Invisible smoke or not, I’m not going to tell you. I’m not.” You shook your head and finally pulled your hands from his and Jake was prepared for you to step back and tell him to leave, to tell him, again, that you had this handled. Instead, your warm palms pressed against his chest and your tear filled gaze locked on his face. His next breath stalled. God, you were beautiful. “I don’t want to be the one to make you look at me differently. Just…just let me have the rest of this night, okay? I’ll text Bradley and tell him that he can tell you. But just let me have this last night where I’m not some stupid, broken girl in your eyes.”

Jake reached up and settled his hands over yours, noticing how goosebumps raced up your arms when his thumbs brushed against your knuckles. “You could never be. You’ll always be Punch.”

You sighed and almost smiled at him before shaking your head, pulling your hands out from under his. “No, I won’t.”

**

You weren’t entirely sure how you managed to convince Jake to watch a movie with you instead of talking or prying more, but you had a bowl of half eaten microwave popcorn between you on the cushions and The Mummy playing on your television.

This wasn’t how you saw this night playing out. Of course, a person could never really fit a car chase and a quick emotional breakdown into their schedule so, perhaps this was the best possible outcome. As Brendan Fraser’s Rick O’Connell gave Evy a pilfered toolkit in the most adorably awkward manner, your gaze drifted over to Jake.

And he was looking right at you.

Shit. Embarrassed heat washed over you and you quickly looked back at the television.

“C’mere.”

“What?” It was barely more than a squeak and you stubbornly refused to move your gaze away from the television again.

“I know you heard me,” Jake repeated, a bit of a laugh cracking his words. “Come here.”

“I’m not a dog, you know,” you bit back before you could think of being polite. Old habits do die hard.

But it seemed like Jake didn’t particularly care, because he moved the popcorn bowl onto your coffee table and then grabbed at your legs, dragging you over to him with a simple tug. The noise that escaped you was a mortifying mix of a squeak and a yelp and you fell forward with the force of it, hands falling against his arm and shoulder awkwardly. His warm, work-rough hands slid up your thighs, skirting over the scar that still left you grimacing even if the pain had faded years ago, and settled on the curve of your waist. Then, with another simple movement, your thighs were bracketing his and he was looking up at you with the stupid, beautiful sea glass eyes. There was something in his gaze you didn’t recognize.

Or maybe you did and you couldn’t voice it.

“What’re you-”

“You look like you needed a hug.”

You arched a brow and ignored the thundering of your heart. How many times had you thought about something like this only to curse your wandering thoughts? “Oh?”

“Yeah. And I’ve been told I give the best hugs.”

Your mouth twisted to the side—you weren’t sure if you were fighting a smile or a snarl. “Who told you that? Which one of your bed warmers-”

The words stalled behind your teeth when Jake leaned up just enough to wrap his arms around you, warm and solid. And you hated that it immediately brought tears to your eyes. God, how long had it been since someone had hugged you like this? Held you like this? You melted into his grasp like butter on hot toast, going slack against him until your forehead rested on the broad expanse of his shoulder. Jake’s movements halted for a moment. And, if you had been anyone else, you might have said you felt his breath catch. But you knew better.

“This means nothing, you know,” you said, one last ditch effort to not let him know how pathetically easy you were enraptured with his easy touch. “I’m withholding my judgment on if you give good hugs or not.”

You heard him smile before his hands continued their smoothing motions up and down your spine. “Okay, Punch.”

You could have argued a little more. Maybe mentioned how he probably needed a hug more than you or how you wouldn’t feel bad when his legs fell asleep under your weight. But you didn’t. You didn’t because you were so comfortable and your favorite movie was playing in the background and Jake’s cologne smelt so good…who could blame you for falling asleep?

**

You snored. Just a little. It honestly reminded him of like…a baby bear for some reason. But maybe you were just extra tired. Jake wouldn’t be surprised if you hadn’t been sleeping well. Either way, Jake slowly slid one arm beneath your butt and kept the other a little higher on your back and gently lifted you up from the couch; your head lolled to the side and fell against his chest as you let out a heavy breath. Jake pretended not to feel how you rubbed your cheek against him and let out a soft hum. Or maybe he filed that little sound away to think about later. Either way, Jake made his way down the short hallway and pushed open your door with his foot, wincing as its hinges whined.

Your eyes opened the slightest bit as soon as your head hit the pillow and Jake was sure he would never forget the smile you shot at him.

Then he was thinking about waking up every morning to your sleepy, happy smile. He was thinking about carrying you to bed after a long night at the Hard Deck. He was thinking of you. He had always tried to shove those thoughts down. He had tried to ignore them because he knew—he knew—that nothing could come of it. But now he couldn’t. He knew what it was like to hold you in his arms. He could deal with the paperwork, admirals, and ribbing from the Daggers…if it meant he could…well, he’d finish that thought when he knew you were thinking the same thing.

After shutting your door, and making a mental note to pick up some WD-40 for those squeaky hinges, he made his way back to your living room. He picked up the popcorn bowl and washed it out and then straightened the cushions, just like his mama taught him to do. The movie finished as Jake sat on your couch and dug his phone out of his pocket. It was well past one in the morning but he still pulled up Bradshaw’s contact and typed out a message. We need to talk.

He’d probably hear from him in the mor-

His phone beeped with a new message and he was quick to click on the thread. I’m on my way.

Wasn’t he supposed to be out in the desert with Maverick? What did he mean he was on his way?

Apparently Rooster was also psychic because another message came through. Cut trip short. Will be at her house in an hour.

So, Jake waited. He played a stupid game on his phone to pass the time and made sure it was muted so it wouldn’t wake you up. Every time he heard a car pass by, he checked the window. He needed to make sure it wasn’t the charger again and he wanted to meet Bradley at the door so you wouldn’t wake up when he knocked. Five more rounds of the mindless game on his phone and then he was standing up again, and watching a familiar Bronco pull onto your driveway behind your car. He was surprised to see Maverick exit the passenger side but waved them both in when they approached the door.

“Where is she?” Bradshaw asked instead of a greeting.

“She’s asleep,” Jake hissed. “Keep your voice down.”

“Have you checked all the windows?” Maverick asked, voice thankfully at the correct decibel.

“A couple times,” Jake said. Maverick knew too? Was he the only one that didn’t know what you were hiding? “Are either of you going to tell me what’s going on?”

Maverick looked at Rooster but Rooster was looking right at Jake, mouth set in a firm line beneath his ridiculous mustache. “I gotta see her first. All right? We’ll stay with her for the rest of the night.”

That just about crawled all over Jake. He was just going to shove him out? After everything that’s happened tonight? “No. No, this is fucking ridiculous. Tell me-”

“Seresin,” Maverick cut in. “You’ve had a long night. Why don’t you head back to base and get some sleep?”

“I-”

“That’s an order, Lieutenant Commander.”

That simple phrase repeated in his head as he sat in the back of the Uber headed toward the Hard Deck, and when he drove himself home, and as he stared at the ceiling of his bedroom. That’s an order, Lieutenant Commander. What it actually was, was insulting. But he did as he was ordered, knowing that Mav and Rooster were trying to take care of you (and Maverick did have the authority to have him brought up in front of the brass)…but why didn’t they see that Jake was trying to help, too? As he stewed, his phone chirped with a notification from his sister, Mia. It was a picture of her sitting out on a familiar porch swing, the Texas night sky on display over her head as she smiled at the camera. She was holding up a cup—Jake knew it was probably filled with her favorite chamomile blend from a shop a few towns over from the family ranch. Hope you’re getting more sleep than me!

Jake sighed for the umpteenth time. Mia’s ex-husband, a man named Ryan who Jake had never liked, had up and left her for a coworker. She was understandably heartbroken and then when she discovered that Ryan had a child on the way with his mistress while Mia had been struggling to have a baby, she had been near inconsolable. It had taken her nearly a week for Jake and his sisters and mom to get Mia out of bed. It had been slow going to help her get back on her feet, even after the lawyer his mom hired managed to get Mia all of the marital assets and half of Ryan’s monetary savings alongside a hefty alimony. Mia had always been the strongest of his sisters, an older sister to the core, who had truly stepped up when their father had stepped out on their mother. It had been a cruel twist of fate that Mia’s marriage had turned out to mirror their mother’s so closely. Jake spoke with each of his sisters at least once a week, mostly just making sure they were doing okay and to lessen the bit of guilt he had for leaving Texas and them in the rear view when he joined the Navy. After tonight, he could use a little talk with his sister.

Jake hit the small phone icon beneath her name and it rang twice before she picked up. “Please tell me I didn’t wake you up with my text.”

“I was awake.”

“What’re you doing up right now?” She grumbled.

“Had a long night.” That was putting it lightly.

“I thought you were going out with that girl, Punch? Not the girl of your dreams anymore?”

Jake bit back the groan he felt rising in his throat. “I never said that.”

“You didn’t need to. You’re my baby brother and I know you. She a bad kisser or something?”

“We are not in high school and I’m not having this conversation with you,” he grumbled, feeling heat start to flood his face.

Thankfully or not, there was a strange fluttering sound on the other end of the line, followed by a muttered, “shit!”

“Everything okay?” Ryan had shown up at the ranch Mia and their mother now shared more than once, raging about the divorce decree and/or asking for a second chance in the next breath.

“Yeah, just dropped my book.” There was a long sigh and Jake imagined her settling back down onto the well worn cushion in the swing.

“What’re you reading?”

“A book.”

He rolled his eyes but felt a smile pushing at his mouth. She could always make him laugh. “Mia.”

“Jacob.” She snickered before continuing. “The author’s name is Georgia Torrance. She writes romances and if you judge me I’ll figure out a way to get your superiors to ground you from flying for, like, three days at least.”

Jake’s smile widened the slightest bit before something clicked. Georgia Torrance. That was the name on the strange books in your home. Can’t wait to see what you come up with next! You had written them, hadn’t you? Under a fake name, sure, but that was you.

If this were any other situation, Jake would drive back to you and simply ask if had a second job as a writer but he’d been banished from your house by his superior officer. So, he’d just bide his time with that, too, he guessed.

“I think I’ve heard of her. She has a few books, right?”

His sister giggled down the line. “Oh, they’re some of my favorites. Me and a few of the other girls have been getting together, like a book club, to read them. It’s fun.”

Jake smiled. She was doing okay, leaning on her friends. “You like those scandalous books, Mia? Gram would be mortified.”

Mia hushed him, but another giggle softened the blow. “They’re a great escape from the shitstorm of my life right now. Don’t judge me. They really are well written! And they’re so soft, Jake! Like, you can tell the characters actually care about each other.” There was a wistful sigh on the other end. “And she does this thing in all of her books.”

“Thing?”

“Yeah, the hero in some fashion or way, always ends up carrying the heroine to bed. Just to sleep. It is in all of her books. It’s her thing. Her trope, or whatever. It is so romantic.”

The sleepy, happy smile you’d given him flashed in his mind and the smallest bit of tension released in his chest. He had made you smile while doing something you, apparently, thought was romantic.

“Are you okay?” Mia asked, pulling Jake from his reverie.

His answering sigh crackled over the phone and he thought of your smile again. “Don’t worry about me.”

**

Someone was sitting on your bed. You had the vague realization of the weight as you teetered between sleep and wakefulness. “Jake?”

“‘s me, Punch.”

You smacked yourself in the face while attempting to wipe the sleep from your eyes. “Bradley? Aren’t you still supposed to be out in the desert with Captain Mitchell?”

“Yeah.” He sighed. “But my favorite mechanic was apparently auditioning for the Fast and the Furious and we cut the trip short.”

Even in the dark of your room, you could see Bradley smile. “You hate those movies,” you said, hating how your voice started to quake. Hadn’t you cried enough?

“I do. Now, are you gonna tell me what happened? And why fucking Hangman was acting like your guard dog?”

Heat dragged up your neck and you were thankful for the dark of your room so Bradley wouldn’t see you almost smile into your pillow. “Is he still out in the living room?” He’d stayed for you.

“Mav sent him home. Wanted me to tell him everything the second we got in.”

“Why didn’t you?”

Bradley sighed again and his warm hand landed softly on your arm. He squeezed it gently. “Had to make sure you were okay first. You will always be the priority.”

“I shouldn’t be,” you muttered. “God, I’m not worth any of this. You should have seen him tonight, Bradley. He just wouldn’t stop. It was a goddamn miracle I was able to get us out of that without totaling my car. And Jake was just…” Traitorous tears stung at your eyes but you let them fall because Bradley had seen you battered and bloody; he could withstand your tears. “Jake was so nice to me. Patient. He doesn’t deserve to be wrapped up in this. None of you do.”

“Hey,” Bradley started, whispered tone bordering on disappointed. “Stop saying shit like that. I’ve told you this a thousand times: you are worth everything. You deserve better than the shitty hand you were dealt. And remember whose dumbass started all this? Me. It was me.”

“It wasn’t you though,” you said, trying to breathe through the tears still trying to choke you.

But Bradley said nothing else but moved a little closer to you on the bed and pressed a kiss to your forehead. You weren’t entirely sure when you fell back asleep but you woke a few hours later with the first rays of daylight peeking through your curtains. It felt like you’d inhaled brick dust after being battered with said brick. Embarrassment was gnawing on your ribs as you rolled out from under your tangled blankets and set your feet on the floor. Everything had gone off the metaphorical rails last night. And a part of you ached at the thought of not having Jake around, even on the periphery, because you knew he would want nothing to do with you after he knew.

You stretched, hearing your back crack, and padded out toward the kitchen where you’d bet Bradley was waiting. And, yep, he was leaning against your counter, sipping on coffee you only kept in the house for him. His hazel eyes looked you over before he set down the mug, porcelain clacking against the linoleum. “You look like shit.”

“I feel like shit. Where’s Captain Mitchell?” You asked as you stepped into the kitchen, too, intent on getting to the lemon poppy seed muffins you saw sitting on the counter. Bradley’s hand slowly raising to block your path had you whining. “Why are you being me to me? I am in need of food.”

“You’re a brat,” he said with absolutely no heat. “And how many times has Mav said you could call him Pete when we aren’t on base?” He grabbed one of the muffins and shoved it at you. A few crumbs fell to your kitchen floor and you knew you’d have to sweep later. But not now. You took a large bite and almost moaned at the taste of it and continued to ignore Bradley’s question. Maverick was your superior. That was it. Keeping people at arm’s length kept them safe—well, you knew that he knew about your predicament but that didn’t mean he needed to be tangled up in it, too. “He picked those up for you this morning before he went to Penny’s for breakfast. Said Ice mentioned they were your favorite?”

You nodded and felt your lips curling up in a smile between bites. “He and Sarah took me to the bakery about a week after I got stationed here.” Tom had insisted that the poppy seed muffins were the best he’d ever tasted and after one bite, you agreed.

Bradley reached for one and hummed after he took a bite, nodding before taking another.

You two ate in silence for a little longer before Bradley, with his stupid baby cow hazel eyes, looked at you again. “What?”

“I checked the house over. It looks like nothing’s been messed with. But why don’t you come stay with me-”

“No.”

Bradley looked like he was trying not to sigh. “Punch, c’mon. It’ll just be until-”

“Until what, Bradley? I can handle this. He…he’ll probably disappear again and we can just forget this ever happened.”

“He tried to run you and Seresin off the road, Punch. Let me help.”

“You already did! You brought me muffins and checked out my house after staying the night when you should’ve been out in the desert and working on Mav’s plane. And that’s just today. You have done enough.”

Bradley’s eyes narrowed as he shoved the rest of the muffin into his mouth—which was ridiculous! He wasn’t even savoring it!—before sighing. “Fine. But you call me if you need anything, okay? Or Bob.” He then paused and you hated how his brow arched. That always meant he was going to say something he thought was clever but was actually stupid. “Or you could call Hangman.”

Embarrassed heat started to claw at your neck and you tried to ignore it and the knowing look in Bradley’s eyes. “You’re being mean.”

“You are asking me to tell him what the hell you have lurking in the shadows-”

“Don’t say lurking in the shadows. We aren’t in a horror movie.”

“-and you still refuse to see how much that guy is in love with you?”

The heat was now scalding and you were sure that your internal temperature had risen a few degrees, too. “Ken isn’t in love with me.”

“And you’re in love with him.”

Were you in love with Jake? No. That couldn’t be possible because, after everything, you knew that being in love and being loved just wasn’t in the cards for you. And the Navy would never allow it. And Jake was…Jake was your friend. And so far out of your league it was ridiculous. You weren’t his type anyway. And you didn’t have a type but if you did it would probably be…Jake. But you didn’t have time to think about that now because there was a tight feeling in your chest and your eyes were watering again and you knew that you were actually…probably…definitely…pathetically in love with Jake Seresin. Shit.

“Yeah, well, it doesn’t matter if I am or not. None of that matters,” you bit out as you blinked back the tears. “Also, when are you going to tell Natasha how you feel?”

Just as you anticipated, Bradley’s cheeks filled with pink and it was his turn to look away. “I’ve got a plan,” he muttered.

The smallest bit of tension slipped from your spine as you realized your diversion had worked, at least marginally. Bradley did have a bad habit of jumping back to conversations you had thought you had moved on from. Oh well. “So you’re not denying it anymore? No more ‘we’re just friends’ or ‘you’re reading into it,’ now?”

The pink in his cheeks grew darker as he reached out to lightly flick at your arm. “I guess.”

Well, at least you had this small victory. And god knows he had been ignoring his feelings for Natasha for years. You surely hadn’t been the only one to notice; Natasha was just as far gone for Bradley but she at least hid it better. You were sure only you and Bob knew about her feelings. “If I were mean, I’d make you tell me your plan. But I am feeling charitable today and will just wish you the best.”

“You’re such a brat.” He pulled you into a hug and sponged a loud kiss onto your forehead before stepping back. After you told him to go home and actually rest, that you’d be fine for the rest of the weekend, and Bradley once again telling you to call him if you needed anything, he left with a final, “lock your door!” thrown over his shoulder.

And then you were alone again. Your heart gave a startled leap when you heard a car door slam a few moments later but you heard your neighbor’s squeaky front door open and close and pushed out the breath you didn’t know you were holding. Great. You eventually swept the kitchen floors and double checked the windows before making the short trek out to your mailbox to check the mail. You stepped back inside and engaged all the locks before sorting through the small stack of envelopes and advertisements. Most were junk and quickly shredded and then put in the recycling bin. You smiled as you recognized your sister’s handwriting across one of the envelopes. Georgie still maintained that you should FaceTime every other week but her letters were a more frequent occurrence. This one was filled with details about her pregnancy and how her husband is being adorable about setting up everything in the nursery. She asked about your job and if you had any suggestions about what to get for your brother, Danny, for his upcoming birthday. You set the letter aside to flip through the rest of the stack but your heart fell to your feet when you saw the last thing in your hand.

It was another goddamn Polaroid. And part of you wished that it had just been you. Just you trapped in that white box. But no. It was Jake. Just Jake. It was him walking out to your car while you’d still been parked at the Hard Deck last night. Poorly drawn blood was bisecting his neck—it was supposed to look like his throat had been slashed, you assumed. It was a shitty drawing but it got the point across.

He could hurt Jake. He could hurt Jake simply because he was near you.

And you wouldn’t ever let that happen. There’d never been a threat like this before—Bradley and Bob never received one and you had been given no threats for them, either. So, it was just Jake. Just your Ken. You needed to keep him safe. Even if it cracked at something behind your ribs.

With all the subtlety of a freight train, you started avoiding him at work. If he walked in a room, you’d walk out. You bribed other ADs to be the ones to handle Jake’s jet. You didn’t go to the Hard Deck if you knew he was going to be there—which was more often than not. You ignored him whenever he called your name. It created a strange waiting game—you wouldn’t have been surprised if you had been called into Admiral Simpson’s office and reprimanded for disrespecting a superior officer. But weeks trickled by and nothing happened except Captain Mitchell giving you a disappointed look and Natasha asking if you and Jake hooked up and if it was bad enough for you to avoid him. After explaining that there was definitely not a hookup (true) and you definitely weren’t avoiding him (lie), you let yourself believe that you had managed to ghost him enough to keep him safe. When you received another Polaroid of you and Jake from the night of Junior’s party with Jake’s face scratched out and the words “I knew he couldn’t handle you” scrawled across the bottom, you knew you’d made the right choice. Then the next note, a singular scrap of paper tucked into the crease between your front door and its frame, read “all alone again? you never know how to treat them!,” your resolve only strengthened.

He could think you hated him forever as long as he was safe.

You could watch him flirt with every beautiful woman who looked in his direction and ignore how your entire body flinched at the sight as long as he was safe.

He just needed to be safe.

**

It had been three weeks since you had fallen asleep in Jake’s arms. And three weeks since you’d spared him more than a side-eyed glance. Rooster had been acting strange, too. While the other pilot hadn’t been avoiding him exactly, Rooster had volunteered to help Mav with the current Top Gun class and had been squirreled away in his office or in the classroom when not in the air. And while Jake could have metaphorically cornered Rooster by asking him over the comms, he wouldn’t ever bring up your name like that when other people were listening. So, when Maverick decided that the newest class needed to be introduced to Dog Fight Football after three pilots got into a screaming match and nearly collided with Phoenix and Bob during a dogfight simulation, he knew this was an opening he needed to take.

In passing, Jake also took the opportunity to ask if the support crew would be invited and earned an unimpressed look coupled with a, “they have been told that they are encouraged and welcome to come, Seresin.” Jake didn’t even care that Mav probably (definitely) knew what he was really asking because he overheard you telling Fanboy that you’d be there because Penny wanted someone to sit with. Perfect.

And you looked perfect when he saw you the next morning. Sitting on a low rise sun chair with Penny at your side and your toes buried in the sand, you had on that pair of shorts Jake dreamed about and a loose fitting shirt with the Dagger Squadron emblem over your heart. You were beautiful. He wasn’t going to shy away from it any more. No more using ‘special’ to hide everything else he wanted to feel. You were beautiful.

Now, Jake knew he was good looking. There was no arguing that. So, why not use it to his advantage? He strode up to you and watched as you looked at him over the edge of your sunglasses. And your face revealed nothing. You were a stone wall when you craned your neck to look up at him but he was undeterred.

“Hi.”

“Hi, Punch.” He then grabbed the bottom of his shirt and pulled it off, dropping it onto your lap as he subtly flexed, crossing his arms over his chest. “Can you hold that for me?”

You seemed to freeze for a moment before grabbing the shirt and neatly folding it. “Sure.” Then you leaned to the side, completely ignoring him, and shouted, “Bradley! Give me your shirt before it gets wet!” Rooster’s shirt eventually turned into Javy’s shirt, Phoenix’s shirt, and Payback’s shirt, and then you made sure that Bob had enough sunscreen on. And Jake watched all of it happen, little more than another bit of sand on your periphery. Just as he was about to call it quits on this attempt, you called out to him. He turned to you to see you looking at him over the edge of your sunglasses again. “Pull up your shorts. You’re about to give everyone a show.”

Penny let out a choked laugh that she tried to hide behind her hand before Jake tugged at the waistband of his shorts, moving them up marginally.

“There you go, Ken. Now you’re almost suitable for public consumption.”

“I prefer private consumption, Punch.” Jake winked at Penny when she laughed again before turning his attention back to you. “I could give you a free preview after we show these kids how to play nicely with each other.”

Jake watched you roll your lips into your mouth before you turned your head away as you pretended (he was sure!) to straighten the small stack of shirts you had collected. “That’s inappropriate. And you of all people don’t know how to play nicely.”

“Oh, Punch,” Jake said, letting as much of his Texan twang seep into his tone as possible when he leaned down to make sure you could look him in the eye (or ogle him correctly). “I play very nicely.”

You licked your lips and looked away but Jake saw your throat bob. “Make sure to tackle Royal into the sand,” you said, mentioning one of the Top Gun pilots who had been involved in the screaming match. “He’s been acting up with the other ADs.”

Well, that was a start. Maybe. “You got it, Punch.”

Then, forty-two seconds into the game, Jake did just that. He looked back at you to see you hiding a laugh behind your hands while Penny roared beside you as Royal yelled about getting sand in his mouth.

The game continued and the grumpy group of pilots eventually started to get along–not as well as the Dagger Squad, but they were something special. Maverick seemed to agree with the exasperated look he shared with Jake and Rooster when they finally called it a day. Penny invited them all up to the Hard Deck for a drink and that seemed to smooth the rest of the rough edges this group came in with, or at least most of them. Maverick bought the first round but Jake was quick to buy another for the Dagger Squadron when that was quickly drained. And, because he was definitely trying to track you through the steadily growing crowd (covertly), Jake spotted you at one of the hightops outside on the deck. Bob and Phoenix were with you, laughing at something you said.

That was the happiest he’d seen you in weeks. Your smile was actually reaching your eyes—your eyes that finally had that light in them that had been missing.

A hand fell onto his shoulder and Jake swung around to see Bradshaw handing him another beer. Even though Jake was less than halfway into the one he already had. “Thanks, man.”

Rooster nodded and took a long pull from his beer before glancing at you, too. He rolled his shoulders before waving his bottle toward the door that led out to the beach. “Let’s talk.” He led Jake onto the sand with quick steps and then stopped just short of the water’s edge.

The other man was quiet for a stretched moment, quiet long enough for Jake to think he wasn’t actually going to say anything but-

“She saved my life.”

Jake tried to process the words before a scratchy “what?” was pulled out of his throat.

Bradshaw took another pull from his beer and then set the empty bottle into the sand by his feet. “The mechanic assigned to me when we were overseas talked a big game—his dad was some big shot who was buddies with the brass at the Pentagon. Name was Luke. He was a shit mechanic, to tell you the truth. Punch would sometimes come in behind him, usually after hours, and double check everything he did. I would talk to her whenever I caught her doing it. She was embarrassed and asked me not to tell anyone and for a few weeks I just didn’t see her, didn’t think anything of it, really. Maybe because I thought she was finally doing something about all the bruising I kept seeing crop on her face. She changed the subject when I asked her once if she was okay.” Jake knew what self-loathing sounded like and right now it was bleeding out of Bradshaw’s every word.

“Then, one day, we get sent out. I run in and half-ass my preflight checks because I was a stupid kid who wanted to make a name for himself. I wasn’t always so careful.” He bared his teeth for a moment. “Stupid. I was so stupid. I’m about to get into the slingshot and she just darts out in front of me, waving her arms and screaming something I can’t hear. She nearly gets taken down by MPs and other officers and I’m fuming, I’m so mad that the rest of my squadron get to go out and I’m grounded by some crazy mechanic.” He shook his head before his hands curled to fists at his sides. “But I’ll never forget how desperate she sounded, screaming that the routine maintenance I would have been needing for the past three weeks hadn’t been done properly. He had been drunk in the hangar. For weeks. When my commander looked my plane over, he said I was lucky I wasn’t sitting in a goddamn body bag. It was a ticking time bomb.”

Jake’s heartbeat was echoing in his ears as he looked at Bradshaw. But more was yet to come.

“I found her trying to hold her leg together just outside the hangar. That asshole took a pair of pliers and…” Rooster’s hand twisted and jerked and Jake could imagine the sharp tool moving like that, moving against you. “He did it just to…just to make her bleed and try to make her apologize for saving my life. One of her eyes was swollen shut and she…” His mouth twisted to the side as if he needed to compose himself before continuing. “She could barely tell me who did it to her before she passed out. Punch was in medical for a week. They wouldn’t let me see her; the only visit I got was from two star who asked what I knew. The next thing I know, she’s been sent back to her shore station and Luke’s disappeared, too. It took me months to learn that all that guy got was a damn Letter of Admonishment and a commercial flight back home.”

“That’s it? That’s all he got?” Rage punctuated each syllable, an unmistakable and inescapable heat starting to burn in his chest.

Rooster scrubbed a hand down his face before continuing. “And what makes it fucking worse is that she was dating him. Dating himand coming to the hangar looking like she’d just gone three rounds with a heavyweight and I didn’t connect the dots until that two star let it slip.”

The rageful heat in Jake’s chest splintered as he thought of you being hurt like that by someone you trusted. How could someone do that to you while claiming to love you? How could anyone do that?

“This was my fault. Mine. She may think it is all hers but if I had asked her just one more time if she needed help, I could have had Luke dishonorably discharged and Punch would be…”

Safe.

Healthy.

Unafraid.

“She was so in love with him and he made her believe he would be the only one who could ever love her. Got it in her mind that no one else would ever lower themselves to love her.”

There was a pointed look shot in his direction that Jake tried to not read too much into (right now).

But Rooster pressed on. “I took a gamble and called Tom…Admiral Kazansky,” he quickly reiterated. “He’d been just about as constant in my life as he could be, you know. Always said I could call if I needed anything. And I just needed her safe.”

The strange look in Rooster’s gaze kept Jake quiet despite the dozens of questions running through his mind.

“He learned what happened and what she did and the next day she gets orders to Hawaii. Then to Kitsap in Washington. The furthest east she got was Fallon in Nevada. She was firmly planted under Kazansky’s oversight. I thought it would keep her safe.”

“But she kept volunteering for deployments,” Jake said after Bradshaw fell into an agitated quiet, like he was searching for words. He didn’t think that your throwaway anecdote from the engagement party would mean this.

“That piece of shit somehow found out where she was going to be at a port call and arrived the day before she was supposed to get back on the carrier. He nearly strangled her to death.”

The murmured stories you had half heartedly given were starting to create a through line. “That was when Bob stepped in. He said they met on deployment.”

Rooster nodded. “Apparently that LoA was to blame for Luke not getting promoted. He blamed her. It didn’t matter that she could have gone in front of the brass and had him court martialed. It didn’t matter that she took money from his just-as-shitty father to keep her quiet. He still saw her as the reason he was given a goddamn slap on the wrist for nearly killing us both. She was still the one that managed to get away. He should be in prison and he was mad about not making rank. Bob was the one who dragged him in front of the brass but that basically amounted to nothing. Again. She refuses to go to the cops because she thinks they’ll just brush it off or cover it up like everyone else does.” He knocked his foot against the empty bottle for a moment before turning to look at you back on the deck. Jake looked, too, seeing you let Phoenix drag you around in a dance. You threw your head back with a laugh as you nearly fell. Bob was cheering you both on. “Kazansky then had her stationed here,” Bradshaw said as they both turned back to look at the ocean. “It was a smart move. Kept her safe. The pilots never stayed but the ADs rarely rotated out. She saw it as a glass half full type of situation—she was trusted with the planes of the best pilots in the Navy but she wouldn’t have the opportunity to deploy as often, if at all. I’m pretty sure Kazansky had Luke shadowbanned from any of the stations he oversaw.”

But now Admiral Kazansky was dead, that was unspoken.

“And now Luke’s back.” The words sounded muffled to Jake’s ears as he said them. His heart thudded against his ribs as his stomach twisted. Luke was back. You were in danger. There was no denying it now.

“He is. And she seems to think that you’ve gained that douchebag’s attention and she just wants to keep you safe,” Bradshaw continued, an edge of exasperation starting to soak each syllable. “You are both so fucking stupid-”

“Hey.”

“-but I need you to help keep her safe, yeah? She’s going to fight you on it. Even more than she has already. But-”

“I’ll do it.” The words punched out of Jake with his next breath. And he meant it. “Whatever you think I need to do, I’ll do it.”

His wingman almost smiled at that. Almost. But he shook his head instead. “Seresin-”

“Punch?”

Both Jake and Bradshaw whipped their heads around back to look at the deck.

“Punch?!” Phoenix was leaning over the railing to crane her neck to the side in search of you, presumably. Bob was doing the same in the opposite direction but his face was scrunched in something almost like fear. “Punch?”

You appeared around the corner, balancing a tray of new drinks for your little group. Both Phoenix and Bob’s faces relaxed as they took the offered drinks, each kissing your cheek in thanks. As you set the tray down and said something to them Jake couldn’t hear before you turned just enough to see Jake looking at you. The carefree smile on your face faded as you glanced at Rooster at his side. You knew he had been told. Your chin tucked to your chest before you abruptly turned back to your other friends.

You truly thought he wouldn’t still want you?

That rage returned, burning behind Jake’s ribs. Not at you. Never at you. At Luke who had beaten you down physically and emotionally hard enough for you to believe that no one would love you.

But Jake was here. He would always be here. Waiting for you.

A/N: thank you for reading! Please let me know what you think!

[papayatori]

Lose it all

MV1 x fém!reader

Warnings: none, just severely sweet fluff

Intro: this is inspired by the song Lose It All by Sam Tompkins.. (wonderful song) Max and his girlfriend y/n have grown incredibly close in the last few years of your relationship, and Max is thinking about taking the next step.

A/n: This one is incredibly cheesy and relatively short, this is just something I was thinking about writing for a while now and just decided to go ahead with it. Enjoy mates!

You and Max had been friends for as long as you could remember; playing in the same streets as kids, having dinner at each other's houses, karting together, you did everything together. From the moment you could both walk, you were inseparable. Max's parents were family friends that lived right across the street from you. Both of them joked that you would grow up to marry one day, and to their expectations, you had both been dating for the last three years.

Recently, however, your mother had been pushing the topic a bit harder You weren't sure if you and Max were ready for marriage yet. Of course, you wanted to marry him eventually, but what if that wasn't mutual?

"You've been together for three years now," you recalled her saying. "don't you think it's time to take the next step? I'm not getting any younger, you know."

She insisted that you'd have children in the next few years, insisted that we needed to start planning a wedding.

While all of that was all well and good, you couldn't help but ask yourself if Max really wanted to marry you or not. Your mother was right, it had been three years, and he hadn't made a move to propose yet. In your mind, this equated to the conclusion that Max must not want you after all.

You sat on the bed that the two of you shared, a tear threatening to fall from your eye. You felt stupid for even thinking about this, you knew Max loved you, but you couldn't help but shake the doubt away.

You had started to reel through your memories with him, feeling heartbroken already. On your first date, Max had been trying to impress you with his athletic ability. What better way to do that than with Wii Bowling? You had been playing together for only twenty minutes before Max, who had insisted the strap on the remote was unnecessary and refused to put it on, launched the remote into your television.

After profusely apologizing, your first official date was spent shopping for another TV that Max insisted on buying you.

You felt the tears pouring now, reliving the memories of your first kiss.

Max's weekend at home had finally come after months of waiting. He had been talking for months about how he couldn't wait to celebrate with his grid mates and introduce me to them all after he had finally won his own grand prix; but instead, he had spent it playing nurse and watching over you.

"The only thing I could think about the entirety of that race was getting back to you to make sure you were okay.."

You had grown ill before the race weekend, causing your own discouragement. This was going to be your first race watching Max in person, and you couldn't have been more excited. Though, you had been bed-ridden by the doctors an forced to watch from your apartment once again.

Max sped back here as soon as he could, hoping not to be gone too long away from you. The thought alone made your cheeks redden, even though there was the biggest knot of guilt forming in your stomach.

"Go celebrate, Max. This is your first home win!" He smiled widely, cupping my cheek.

"I'd rather be sick with you." He pressed his lips to mine gently, not caring about the consequences that might come along with it.

The door to your bedroom swung open, revealing a clearly concerned Max behind it.

"Schatje, what's wrong? In a second you were in his arms, so tightly you were worried you might've suffocated. "Why are you crying?" He kissed your head tenderly.

You hadn't even realized you were crying as hard as you were until you were practically sobbing into Max's chest.

"I can't lose you Max." You could barely even get your words to form from your quivering lips. He laughed a little, sending you into a confused state. "I'm serious!" You gave him a hurt glance. "Why would I being going anywhere, y/n?" He cupped your cheek, forcing you to look up at him. His eyes were full of nothing but worry for you, that alone made you start crying again.

"It's been three years, Mum says she's starting to worry we won't make it. She says you would have proposed by now."

Max gave you a knowing glance, heaving a sigh.

"Your mother isn't the one to make that call, Schatje." He gave me a smile, standing from our position on the bed. "Come on, lets get you cleaned up."

He pulled you into the bathroom, sitting you on the sink counter. He opened the drawers, grabbed the makeup wipes and started wiping the remnants of your tears and mascara off of your face. Afterwards, he took a damp towel and wiped the residue away.

"Stay here, I'll be right back." He gave your hand a little squeeze before disappearing back into the bedroom. After a few long moments, he came back with one of your favorite, blue sundresses. You were a little confused at first, but took the dress nonetheless. You were sure Max was planning something, but you didn't know how this was going to aid the question at hand.

He couldn't be avoiding it, could he?

With that newfound doubt as you looked in the mirror, you refused to cry again, already seeing the sadness growing in your eyes as Max walked back into the bathroom to check on you. This time, he had a pair of your favorite heels that he handed you eagerly. You put them on, still eyeing him skeptically.

...

...

...

After a few hours of driving and every attempt at asking Max where the two of you were going, you eventually pulled into a beautiful grass field.

A beautiful grass field in the middle of nowhere.

You looked over at Max, praying that he wasn't some serial killer in disguise the entirety of your life. Though, if he was, props to him, he had played the part exceedingly well.

"Wait here, y/n." So you did.

You sat in the car for about ten minutes, hearing Max messing around in the boot before finally coming around to the passenger side door and opening it for you. He offered his hand to help you out of the car.

"M'lady." He grinned at you, the biggest grin you've ever seen. You couldn't help but give a small smile back regardless of the worry that had manifested itself inside of your heart. You let him pull out of the car, revealing a beautiful landscape all around you.

"Ahem." You heard Max clear his throat from behind you. You turned around, revealing a picnic basket and a blanket under one of the trees behind where you had parked. You smiled broadly at Max.

"You took me all the way out here just to make me feel better?" You felt your heart swell with joy. How had you ever doubted this man..

He took your hand tenderly, leading you over the blanket.

You both ate together, talking every so often, sipping on wine that made you feel so elegant you could hardly stand it. Though, after a while, you eventually both sat in a comfortable silence, holding each others' hand in peace. Then, Max's voice broke through the silence.

"You asked me earlier if I had only brought you out here to make you feel better.." He started, looking over at me as if to ask if he could continue. You hummed in agreement before he continued, pulse quickening as you had started to question how this would fix your worries once again. "I'd actually been planning this for a while now. I wanted to get you out somewhere nicer but, after what you had said earlier..." His voice trailed off, his eyes falling to the ground.

You felt that twinge of guilt swell back up in your gut.

"I figured being away from people and their opinions would be good for us." To my surprise, he looked at you with another one of his beautiful smiles. You could feel the ice melting from your heart. Max had started to look a little nervous.

"When I look into your eyes, the only thing that I can see is perfection. I'd thank whatever God was out there that you were mine this moment, and I'd beg the same God to allow you to stay mine for the next. You've been on my mind for the last three years, giving me nightmares every night that you'd walk away if I kept prolonging this. After hearing the reason you were upset this afternoon, I knew I couldn't wait any longer, because if I were to lose you, I'd lose it all." He wiped a tear from his eye, pulling a small box from his pocket. "Will you marry me. y/n"

You barely even gave him time to finish his question before you tackled him in a hug.

"Yes, a million times yes!" You were both emotional, giggling messes before Max pulled away for long enough to slip the ring on your finger, causing more tears to escape your eyes.

"Now you know why I never answered your question." He whispered, kissing you softly as you both watched the sun disappear behind the horizon. "I'm sorry that I worried you further, if I had. I just didn't want to give anything away."

"I'm just glad that I was only overthinking and it wasn't a reality." He chuckled.

"Like I said, Schatje, we're the ones that determine whether or not we are going to make it and how far we go. Let's not listen to anyone else about that, yeah?" You smiled up at him, a tear falling once more as you leaned in to kiss him.

"Yeah."

... I won't grow up missing a piece of my heart that you hold

... I won't have these nightmares because I let you know

... That if I ever lose you, I lose it all

~Sam Tompkins

[heartfullofleeches]

yes please dear god smile reader is baby

[Very baby. Here's how Yan Scientist and their slime formally met]

"Subject 43? Payment for yesterday's efforts."

"An apple....but you said I could go home."

Feeding day - as if their headache couldn't get any worse. Like common livestock, their possessions squealed and whined about the most senseless things. Pleading for testing to cease; begging to be returned to their families when it was their love ones who sold them to begin with. The scientist would sooner snip out their tongues if it meant a moment of peace, but they were not a tyrant - plus verbal records of their subjects experiences was easier to stomach at night than written. The audio logs had lulled them to sleep better than any pill or liquid could.

"I said it was a possibility - if you did what I asked properly. You may have killed your cellmate, but you did not bring me their eyes. A shame really. I took the time out of my day to prepare your meal by hand. Ah - well, there's someone who will appreciate my efforts more. Tell me, tuna or ham?"

A wet gurgle sounds from the scientist's pocket."

"Both? You greedy devil. I suppose you do deserve something special for putting up with the same pains that I do."

The scientist picks up two sandwiches and smushes them together as the mass in their pocket becomes denser; gooey tendrils slithering up the length of their coat and crawling onto their shoulder as they lift their hand. The blob sucks up the sandwiches into its gelatinous body, wiggling with delight as they're broken down and absorbed into its structure. The scientist pats the gel with one finger causing it to vibrate more violently resulting in a breathy laugh from its owner.

"Alright, we have more subjects to feed. Come on, You - you too."

The scientist snaps their fingers at the Henchman wheeling the cart who closes the cell door as they both exit. The slime creeps down their shirt and through their sleeve as they walk, resting in the scientist's palm. A marvel their little companion was. They wished they had the honor of creating it, but it's origins were a mystery even to them. The scientist found the creature munching away on the undissolved bones of a past test subject. From numerous experiments, the scientist discovered their new lab partner could not only breakdown organic compounds, but most non living object too and had a choice on what it consumed. It made for the perfect little helper to get rid of all the dead bodies and those who oppose them. The best part about the slime was that it had no mouth and therefore the most tolerable member of the team.

The scientist's smile melts as they enter the next cell. The stress that had fled them by the usage of their slime as a stress toy skyrocketed seeing the act of utter betrayal pointed at them. A lackey, standing over a motionless subject - gun raised at their employer. The scientist sighs.

"Please remove your mask."

The Henchman does as told. Figures - there was only one other person the scientist trusted with the codes. They supposed trying to make this a family business was a poor decision.

"Emery - this has got to stop."

A chuckle. "Does it really?"

"You won, just let him go. I know you didn't have the best upbringing, but he still your -"

Emery grits their teeth, squirming the slime so hard it slithers out of their grip. "You don't know shit. If it makes you feel any better, I haven't actually done anything to him - yet. Just locked him down here, with all the others nobody would care to miss. There is no persuading me on this. If you have nothing else to say - do it."

Their Henchman reaches for his gun, Emery rests their hand over his. Through clouded view and reasoning, the figure steadies their gun. They look away, unable to look as they pull the trigger on the once innocent child they knew. Emery doesn't flinch as it fires - a teal web covering the entirety of their chest and dissolving the bullet as soon as it hits. Their attacker looks on in horror, but before they can do anything Emery takes their henchman's gun as their own and fires back, bullet piercing their heart. Emery's head falls, expressionless eyes gazing out at the person left alive - mouthing two words.

"Your fault."

Emery exhales, placing a hand over their chest and gathering the slime into one ball. "One thing after another. Now I have to fire a new head. Eat your meal and return to me when you're done."

They lower the slime to the ground who plops out on the smooth surface - spitting an apple out that rolls at the scientist feet. They pick it up as they walk off, wiping away tears.

-

A picture frame shatters.

"Why would you choose him and not me. Why!?"

The picture holds a smiling, bucktooth child in the arms of their butler as they show off their award for the camera and all to see. The person who taught them everything, the only one there when they had no one. Emery throws an empty bottle at the image, sinking down at the foot of their bed - cradling their arms to their chest.

"why....."

The sound of wet suction weaves into their cries as the slime wrigglies itself beneath the crack in their bedroom door. It inches towards them, shaking violently before spitting up as locket on the floor. Emery goes to grab it, but as they do the smile shoots up their arm and spreads out, and puffs up over their shoulder like a makeshift pillow. Emery cards their fingers their hair, climbing to their feet and pocketing the trinket.

"I guess I do need some rest. Thank you, You. You seem to be the only one I can't trust."

More gurgles.

"I guess I should give you an actual name eventually." They sight - broken body collapsible on their bed and crawling under their blankets with the help of their aid. The slime hops up on their pillow as they raise their head - solidifying as they rest. "Goodnight, You."

That night - Emery had the worse night's rest they ever had in their twenty-seven years of living.

"You are my sunshine. My only sunshine. You make me happy, when skies are gray~"

Is someone ... singing?

"You'll never know, dear. How much I love you-"

The voice sounds so familiar....no... There's more than one. It's hard to remember something so sweet - when all those voices ever did was beg you to stop.

"Please don't take - my sunshine away."

Emery shoots up like a lightning bolt. Their hands search the bed for their glasses which had fallen - finding a squishy, but very real feeling hand beneath their grasp. Emery locates their glasses as the body's see through eyelids peel back.

"Goodnight, You!"

Emery screams - rolling out of the bed in a tanglement of their blankets and obscenities. The interior in the bed sits up, puzzled; bubbles floating through their translucent body as their anxiety peaks.

"Emery.....this you?" The figure points, noting the odd number of fingers on its hand as it looks at theirs. "Mmm wrong...."

Emery's eyes widen as the slime's sixth finger merges into the fifth. "Y-you?...."

The slime chirps. "Emery!"

Emery looks strength in their knees. "What? How?..."

"Ahhh.... You - eat meal... gr...ow better at shape. Too much at one time - hard to understand. Able to single out things Emery say - Emery is... the only one I can trust."

Emery clutches their head. "Ngh..."

"Help?" The slime lunges foward, reverting to its natural state as it crashes into the floor and forming back into its humanoid shell as it catches them before they stumble. It was hard to notice with half of them hanging off the bed, but the slime was massive - size their size if they had to estimate. They bury their face into their hands. "This can't be happy.

The smlie's droppy smile falters. "Wrong? Wanted to make you happy. I..will go back if it makes you happy. Sad Emery...makes me sad too."

Emery looks up at the slime. They raise out their hand, stroking the slime's cold cheek. It hums with a full body shutter - leaning into their palm until their fingers poke through the membrane. Emery retracts their hand, sliding it into their now empty pocket.

"It's fine. I guess we really need to pick a name for you now."

"Mm I pick?"

"Do you have something in mind?"

"Y/n!"

"Where'd you pick up that one?"

The slime points to their head. "Memories. I... like it the most out of them."

"I see... Y/n, it's cute. Alright, Y/n - let's go get some breakfast."

The slime spits a small bag from its stomach contents onto its hand, giving the trail mix too them. That's much more alarming when it's coming out a real mouth and tongue.

"Breakfast!"

Emery takes it with two fingers, holding the dripping bag away from their face. "Thank you, Y/n......at least I have you by my side."

[donnas-dollface]

"Home Is You."

pairing; valeria garza x afab! reader

warnings; nothing really, it's just pretty fluffy because i'm yearning for some domestic content :') and because my cramps are killing me.

summary; that time of month always sucks. you swear that your own body is trying to kill you, with the way your cramps manage to leave you bedridden. but your amazing girlfriend takes the day off to watch over you.

NOTHING COULD DESCRIBE THE HELLISH PAIN YOU WERE IN THIS MORNING. The way that it felt like somebody was squeezing your insides, and every little movement somehow managed to make it worse. Just laying still did very little to soothe your cramps. You'd simply be laying still, and suddenly the wave of nausea would hit you like a train. Your eyesight and sense of smell were also heightened for whatever reason, making you more vulnerable to the nausea and headaches.

After awhile of trying to lay in a comfortable position, you gave up, just simply laying in the quiet bed, your eyes shut. Somewhere in the messy bedsheets, the sound of your phone buzzing caused you to perk up. A loud sigh left you, and you began to lazily pat the bed, searching for it. Maybe it was just a phone notification or something of the like. But on the rare chance that it was Valeria, you always checked. She hardly messaged when she was working or doing business, but there were those times she'd slip away to talk with you for a few moments.

Finally, your hand managed to locate the phone, and you lifted it besides your face, turning on the screen. The message icon popped up, revealing a message from the one person on your mind. Her.

"Good morning mi amor. You feeling any better than earlier?"

"more miserable actually, my stomach wants me dead."

"I'm sorry I had to come in today, but I'll make it up to you. Do you need me to pick you up anything?"

"bottles of ibuprofen and a vitamin water please?"

"Alright, I'll see you after awhile hermosa. I hope you're drinking your water."

And with that, you shut off your phone. It'd be hours until she'd come home, and that's if there wasn't some urgent matter that needed her attention. Maybe it was best to try and nap again for half the day. It was better and more appealing than suffering for the entirety of it. After a bit of a struggle, you found a comfortable position, dozing off for a good hour or two. It wasn't until you felt the shift in the mattress that you stirred, rolling over to see what it was.

Valeria stared back, smiling a bit, moving herself closer to you. Wrapping her arms around you, she gently pulled you on top of her, your head on her chest. Her warmth and scent brought a bit of comfort, and you sighed contently.

"You look like shit."

"I sure feel like it."

One of her hands was already in your hair, weaving through it, gently massaging and scratching your scalp with her manicured nails, while the other rubbed your lower back. That was the thing with you. She couldn't stand seeing you in pain, even if it was something uncontrollable like menstrual cramps. Business and everyone could wait, if you needed her, she'd come with no hesitation. Cruel and heartless, she could be with anyone else. But with you, she allowed herself to let her guard down. To be loved.

After a few moments of silence, she pressed her lips to your forehead, just living in the moment. With the way your breaths were slow and quiet, she already knew you'd fallen asleep. Not that she minded, your skin was pale, and your eyes had exhaustion written all over them. Maybe after you woke up, she'd take you into the kitchen to make something small and pick out a show. Anything you wanted.

-Kaylee 11/23/2023

*reblogs greatly appreciated and welcomed!!

[cowgurrrl]

i love oftm fam so much 🥹 i would love literally any updates on them :)

OFTM GANG RISE UP 🗣️🗣️🗣️

How Could I Not Love You?

Pairing: rockstar!joel miller x actress!reader

Author’s note: this isn’t my favorite but I miss them desperately

Summary: “You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.” [2.5k]

Warnings: newborn stuff, angst, the Garcia-Long family coming in clutch, god they are so in love it hurts, smutty dialogue toward the end but no smut because I chickened out

You don't know that you've ever been this tired. The girls have been in the world for a whopping two and a half months, and you feel like you've been awake for the entirety of those two months. None of the Miller kids are particularly good sleepers— even Sarah didn't sleep through the night until she was two and a half, which Joel conveniently forgot to tell you when you talked about having kids— but with the addition of the girls, it feels much harder. They wake up at different times throughout the night to feed, get changed, or be held, which complicates the rotation. Also, Sam's sleep schedule has regressed, and he's up at random times. Having three under five is not all it's cracked up to be.

You love Joel, and you love watching him be a dad, but your relationship has suffered through the just-barely-surviving stage of having newborns. You try to make time to watch a movie or just talk, but whenever you do, someone starts crying. Even if you're able to sit down for more than five minutes without a kid needing something, you're half-asleep and in no shape for a conversation. 

It didn't hit you how much of a toll it's taken on you until you were up for one of the late-night feeds with Violet, and he lay there, watching you through the darkness. You turned to look at him and reached out with your free hand to smooth down some stray hair. He smiled sleepily and turned to kiss your wrist before whispering, "I miss you." You wanted to say that he doesn't need to miss you, and you're right there, but you weren't. Not really.

"I miss you, too," you whispered back, feeling the sting of the truth on the back of your tongue. You wanted to say more—to remind him how much you love him and tell him how you couldn't do this without him—but Sophia's tinny cry closed the window of opportunity before it could fully open. 

You love your kids. You couldn't imagine anything better than watching them grow and interact with each other. They are so wanted and loved, but it still feels really fucking hard. You're sitting on the couch, feeding a baby while Joel bounces another and plays Army men with Sam, feeling like a horrible wife and mother, when the lock turns on your front door and your second family enters.

Carolina, Ryan, Elizabeth, Victoria, and Penelope descend upon your living room like well-meaning vultures, and you give them a confused look. Penelope immediately runs to Sam, and they embrace in their awkward toddler way before they scurry off to his room to play. Victoria, now nine and looking more like Carolina every day, gushes over Daisy. Elizabeth, in her teenage grace, plops down next to you on the couch and squeezes you, trying not to disturb Sophia too much.

"What are you doing here?" You ask Carolina, looking at her like she's a saint, and she smiles. 

"I heard you could use a break," she says. You're about to argue with her and insist that you've got everything under control, but she stops you. "We have two and a half adults, play buddies for Sam and Daisy, and nothing to do for the rest of the day. Plus, I've been itching to hold a baby." She explains. You turn to look back at Joel, who is now babyless and standing next to a baby-equipped Ryan, and give him a look.

"Did you do this?" You ask.

"Would it be the worst thing in the world if we went to dinner alone?" Just the idea of an actual dinner is enough to make you waver. You've both been living off of takeout and Sam's leftovers since the girls were born, and you're dying for a change of scenery. There's more than enough frozen breastmilk in the fridge for the girls, and they're at ease with their aunt and uncle. Sam is ecstatic to have someone to play with, and Daisy looks excited to get some attention. Surely, a few hours couldn't hurt. 

"Fine, but you can't make me wear pants." 

"Wouldn't dream of it," Joel says. Once Sophia is done feeding, you hand her off to Carolina and show Elizabeth where everything is. They don't need a rundown of everything a newborn needs, but it makes you feel better to ramble about their routine to make sure it all gets done. 

With all the kids placated, you and Joel sneak off to your room to change out of the clothes you've been wearing for God knows how long. You put on a maxi dress and spray dry shampoo in your hair while Joel buttons up a nice shirt. 

"Thank you," you say as you put on earrings, glancing at him in the mirror. “You didn't have to do this." He gives you a confused look but shakes it off with a quick kiss to your cheek.

"I wanted to. You deserve a break."

"We deserve a break," you correct, and he hums as he wraps an arm around your waist. Even though he hasn't been dealing with postpartum and breastfeeding problems, he's still been in the trenches with you. For a quiet minute, you stand together and take a breath for the first time in months. Yeah, you desperately needed this. 

You quickly finish getting ready before your plans can get thwarted and are shooed out of the house by Carolina and Ryan. They promise to text you updates and have everyone in bed on time, but don't pressure you to come home early. "We've got this," Carolina says with enough conviction that you can believe her. Still, your anxiety spikes once you're down the driveway, and you have to convince yourself that everything is okay. Joel grabbing your hand and asking you a question pleasantly distracts you. 

The autumn sun slowly sets over the California hills and casts a golden glow over Joel's face, catching the grays in his hair and beard beautifully. He's fifty now and older than he ever thought he'd be. He told you as much on the night of his birthday, along with his fears of being an older dad and husband. "I just don't wanna miss anythin'," he said. You reminded him that he was only fifty and he's in exceptional health for someone who spent most of his thirties and forties making music and bouncing around the world on tours. Plus, aging looks good on him. 

You talk about little things like how he's scribbled lyrics onto a notepad he keeps beside the bed or how Daisy has adjusted to having three little kids around instead of one. You're in the middle of saying something when he makes a familiar turn, and you can't stop the laugh from leaving you as the restaurant comes into view. 

"Are you serious?" You ask, looking at him with a big smile, and he shrugs.

"What?" He asks, as if he's not stopping in front of the restaurant where you had your first (contractually obligated) date. 

"Joel, we haven't been here in…" you trail off as you do the mental math before gasping. It's ten years to the day of your first date. Guilt immediately pools at the base of your spine, but Joel just sits there with a smirk on his face. "Oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I didn't even realize. I've been so caught up with Sammy and the girls and-" he leans over the center console and kisses you before you can continue rambling. 

Normally, you make it a point to remember days like this. Your first date, breaking up, getting back together, getting engaged, getting married, all of it. That's why it's so shocking that you forgot about it, and on a milestone year, no less. 

"I'm so sorry." You say, and he shakes his head. 

"I didn't say anything, so it could be a surprise," he says. "I called Caro and Ryan about a month ago to set this up, and I rented out the whole restaurant, so it's just us. We don't have to worry about cameras or fans or anythin'." 

Of fucking course, he would do something like this. You sigh and drop your head to his shoulder. 

"I didn't even get you anything." You mumble guiltily. He chuckles and kisses your temple.

"You just had two of my kids. I think that's more than enough." He says. You could spiral about feeling like a bad partner (how could you forget when your life together started?), but you have plenty of time for that. For dinner, however, you're on the clock. So, you push the thoughts away for now and stare at your husband fondly.

"I love you so much it's stupid," you say, and he smiles.

"Right back atcha, baby." He says. Much like he did on your first date, he gets out first and gives the car keys to the valet before opening your door for you. You take his arm and walk into the restaurant with him. There's no need for a hostess since there's only one table set up in the space, and it's impossible to miss it. Beautiful flowers surround the table, already set with a bottle of wine and a bouquet of red roses like the ones he turned up at your door with. He pulls your chair out for you and steals a kiss before moving to the other side of the table. Light, romantic music plays over the speakers, and the candle flickers in the middle of the table. It's perfect. 

The bottle of wine is from the year you were married, and it has a special label bearing both your names. You haven't had any wine for almost a year, and Joel, knowing this, evidently pulled out all the stops. He pours each of you a glass and raises it in a toast. "Thanks for going on a second date with me," he says, and you laugh. 

"Thanks for giving me a reason to." You say and clink your glass against his. The wine is amazing, and it's not just because you haven't had any in so long. You spend some time catching up with each other and talking about nothing important until a very nice waiter comes by to take your orders. Besides the waiter coming and going, you're left alone with Joel, with nobody crying or asking you for anything. It's nice, if not a little strange. 

You take your time eating and drinking and giving Joel your full attention. You laugh together and get butterflies when he kisses your hand or brushes his knee against yours. It's a little silly to get so worked up over such small gestures, but it's been a hot second since you've had adult time, so you figure it's fair. God forbid you still find your husband attractive. 

In the middle of dessert, a special request of Texas Trash Pie— which doesn't come close to his mother's but is still delicious— you look up from the dish and find whipped cream in his beard. You snort a laugh at the sight, and Joel furrows his brows.

"What?" He chuckles. You gather your napkin in your hands and reach out to wipe his face, not unlike you do with your son, and he blushes a little when he realizes what was making you laugh. "Can't believe you still like a mess like me." He says before taking another bite and somehow getting more on his face. Once you're full and pleasantly tipsy from the wine, you scoot your chair closer to Joel, and his hand finds a home on your thigh. 

You can't stop staring at him. You track the changes you've watched unfold over the past decade: a little more grey on his temples, the creases next to his eyes a little more prominent, and his hair a little longer. He still has that indescribable sparkle in his eye that you think can only be a product of his joy. Your heart squeezes when it only intensifies as he looks at you. 

"We've been together a long time," you say, and he hums. "Ten years, five kids, one dog, three finished albums, and one in the works."

"And four movies, an Academy Award, and how many others?" Joel chimes in, never the one to just accept praise, and you roll your eyes playfully.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever," you say, making him smile. You grab his left hand and trace his gold wedding band back and forth and back and forth a few times before you look at him again. "I mean, considering everything, we've done pretty well for ourselves. Can you handle ten more years with me?"

"I'd take a hundred more years with you." He says so quickly it takes your breath away. "I'd do it all over again if it meant this would be our life." 

"Even though we have to change shitty diapers and get no sleep?" You ask, the question betraying the sudden tears, and he laughs.

"There are worse things." Like thinking you'll never see each other again. Like running out of time. Like never seeing him in our children's faces. Yeah, there are much worse things. You take a deep breath and squeeze his hand. 

"I love you." You whisper like you told him you missed him not even a week ago. 

"I love you, too." He whispers back as he kisses you sweetly. The waiter lets you linger for another half an hour before dropping the check and very politely tells you they'll be closing soon. Joel leaves a big tip as an apology for staying so late and personally thanks all the staff who worked to make this possible. He's all Southern charm and manners, even as you leave the restaurant and wait for the car. 

"Thank you for tonight." You say, and Joel gives you a look. 

"Y'know, we don't have to go back just yet. The kids are all in bed. Carolina and Ryan said to enjoy each other." He says, and you squint at him, a smirk pulling on your lips.

"And what would we do with all that extra time?" 

"I might've reserved a room in a hotel nearby, just in case. We can order breakfast to the room early and be home before the kids wake up." 

"Do Caro and Ryan know about this?" You ask, but you already know the answer. You scoff a little and shake your head before stepping close to him. "You must've been really desperate to fuck your wife to plan all this, huh?" Your lips brush against the shell of his ear, and you swear, you feel him shudder. 

"Don't worry, baby. I'm gonna take such good care of you."  

TAGLIST: @abbyhaslongshorts @kiwiharrykiwi @sumsworldz @myloveistoolittle @anavatazes @marantha @cosmoscoffeee @shyminnie07 @beezusvreeland @eddiemunsonsbedroom @harriedandharassed @doodlebob-mp3 @ignorethksplz2004 @buckyispunk @d1lf-loverrr @vee-bees-blog @moel-jiller @anoverwhelmingdin @casssiopeia @maried01 @acupofhollie

[fairlyang]

Present 🏹

in which kate unwraps her present

w/c: 2.8K

pairing: kate bishop x f!reader

tags: 18+ smut. fluffy at first, horrendous ugly xmas sweaters, flips a switch, teasing, groping, grinding, fingering, sweet aftercare, more fluff, matching jammies and hats, hot chocolate

——

You were sitting in your living room reading a book with Lucky napping on your leg and Christmas music playing softly in the background when suddenly the front door bursts open. In comes your girlfriend Kate with loads of bags in her hands.

She dumps them on the floor then closes the door before pointing at them with a wide smile. "I got you something." She says and goes through her bags unsure which one to show you first.

"This won't be good." You mumble petting Lucky's head before he jumped down to greet her while you closed your book and put it on the coffee table.

"Hey buddy!" She exclaims pulling away from her bags to play with him.

His tail was wagging back and forth since he hadn't seen her all day because she was out shopping without you. There was no one to babysit him and she didn't want him to stay home by himself while you both shopped for hours. She feels too bad.

So you told her to go by herself which you would soon regret.

She pulls away and opens a bag, digging in it for a few seconds before taking out a sweater for Lucky. She gasps and holds it up to him, he excitedly sat down waiting for her to put it on.

She takes off the price tag and quickly slips it on him with ease. "Go show mama your new sweater!!" She says and points to you.

He quickly runs up to you and does a little twirl before sitting down, tail still wagging, tongue happily out. His sweater made it seem like he was an elf, with cute little red and green cotton balls on it.

"You look so handsome Lucky." You said and scratched behind his ears which made him tilt his head to the side.

"I knew I had to get him a few things and absolutely adored that sweater!!" She says excitedly, taking tags off what looks to be a bunch of toys.

"You have great taste baby." You coo, taking a quick glance at her, and fixing the collar on Lucky's shirt.

She then dumped brand new toys she got him onto the floor. "Santa!!!" She yells and squeezes the toy's belly, making a loud squeak noise that instantly got his attention.

He sprinted towards her and grabbed the toy out of her hands before running off to some other part of the apartment, toy still getting squeaked.

Kate turned towards you, holding something behind her back. "I got you the best thing I've laid my eye on." She says, standing up and walking over to you.

"That's only making me nervous Katie." You chuckle and she shrugs.

"I promise you'll love it." She replies and takes a seat next to you.

She then moves her hands and places a sweater on your lap. You grab it and hold it up only to burst out laughing.

"Now Kate-"

"Please try it on! Pretty please." She pleads, giving you your best puppy dog eyes which you couldn't deny.

"Fine." You mumble and get up, walking towards your shared bedroom.

You tried to take a peak at the other bags she had before she quickly spun you around and made you go to the direction of your room. "No peaks!!!" She exclaims, pointing a finger at your face.

"Ugh fine! All I'm saying is you better have an ugly sweater too." You groan and she gives you a thumbs up.

You walk away, entering your bedroom and closing it shut before taking a closer look at the sweater.

And of course it was an ugly Christmas one.

Because Kate bought it.

It was a red sweater with white snowflakes all over it, with green stripes along the entire collar, cuffs of the sleeves, and the bottom of the sweater. But worst of all it had a big gold bow on the entirety of the chest with a gold strip right through the middle.

Oh but the absolute cherry on top was the "You're welcome" tag attached to the bow.

How the hell Kate always found the weirdest of sweaters ever is beyond your knowledge. And how she finds worse ones after every year....

You sigh and take off the hoodie you snatched from her side of the closet before leaving it on the dresser. You then slip the sweater on and pray it wasn't itchy.

It surprisingly wasn't but it felt almost heavy? There was just so much going on and the colors were atrocious.

Sure it was the colors of Christmas but it couldn't be a sage green? Forest green?

It was all way too bright but the things you'd do for Kate....

You took a deep breath then let it out before opening the door and going back to the living room only to find Kate with her back to you.

"I swear to god Kate Bishop if yours isn't as ugly as this one-" you start but she turns around, shutting you up.

Your eyes widened and you brought a hand to cover your mouth.

And there was your lovely incredible Christmas loving girlfriend in an ugly Christmas sweater.

Somehow more ridiculous than yours but it was the tiniest bit cute on her.

So it technically wasn't fair.

She moved her hair back and grinned, "what do you think?"

"It's.... Ugly?" You say unsure what she wanted to hear.

It had different blue and white patterns along the top and bottom, with thick red strips along the collar, cuffs and bottom of it. But what made hers so.. different was the fact that there was a Santa on it.

With his sleigh.

And physical plushie reindeers flying it.

And colorful pom poms along the sleeves.

It was truly horrendous but the reindeer, the most ridiculous part of the entire sweater, somehow made it look cute.

Maybe only because it was Kate that was wearing it and you thought she looked good in absolutely everything...

"I don't even wanna know where you got them." You cut off the silence and she chuckles before taking a step forward towards you.

"Not like I'd tell you anyway!" She teases before reaching up and tugs on two strands of your bow.

"S'cute." She mumbles under her breath making you snort.

"Yeah right." You groan making her laugh.

"You make it look cute, pretty girl." She coos, wrapping her arms around your waist, pulling you closer.

But her reindeer then poke your chest and stomach making her pull away slightly. "I do have other actual cute things for us but I just had a thought..." she mumbles, leaning in towards your neck.

She left a soft kiss on your skin, not caring about your sweaters bothering each other. "And what's that baby?" You ask quietly, already having a slight idea.

"I wanna unwrap my present." She murmurs against your skin making you let out a sigh.

"Don't gotta say it twice." You breathe out and she hums, kissing up to your ear then nibbling on your earlobe.

"You're so gorgeous." She murmurs as she pulls away and quickly grabs your hand leading you to your bedroom.

"Eager much?" You tease making her groan as you walk into your room.

She closes the door and pushes you against it, slipping her leg between yours and with her hands gripping your hips. "Acting as if you don't want me to." She coos and gives you a little pout.

"You're such a tease." You whine and she grins.

"Good." She mumbles before going back to your neck but this time immediately sucking on your skin then leaving a wet kiss on it before finding another area to mark.

You moaned as she left another mark and your hands made their way to her hair, slightly pulling on it how she likes it. "So did you- j-just see this sweater and thought of this?" You stutter making her chuckle and pull away.

"Kind of. I know you appreciate a good dirty joke." She says with a smirk on her face.

"So are you gonna unwrap your present?" You ask lightly fluttering your lashes at her and she only shrugs before grabbing your hand, bringing you to the bed.

"I will.. but first I wanna see something." She says and you both walk to the edge of the bed.

"Lemme just see something really quick.." she mumbles and gets on the floor.

She brings her hands up to the waistband of your sweats and she pulls them down all the way. You step out of them and she whistles. "I'm so lucky."

"Speaking of-"

"He's fine!"

"Now back to where we were before..." she says and walks behind you.

Her hands were all over your body, the bow making noises that irked your ears but as soon as she started groping your tits you didn't mind.

Your ass was directly on her crotch now and you did what you had to and started grinding on her as she squeezed your tits. "Mmm Kate." You moan and she grinds her hips against you making you both moan.

"Bet you're already all soaked for me, aren't you baby?" She whispers in your ear as she pinched your nipples softly.

You moan and lay your head back against her, she leans her cheek against it as you relaxed into her arms. You continue your grinding making her groan and hump against you. "God you're driving me crazy baby." She moans and goes back to kneading your tits.

"Please-"

Without another word she grabbed you and put you on the bed with her jumping right behind you, literally.

"I wanna try something a little different okay?" She says and you nod.

"Just need you."

"I know baby, I know." She coos in your ear as she helps you get comfortable between her legs.

She makes you kind of lay your back against her then slowly starts trailing her fingers over your body. You lean your head back and buck your hips up already wanting her touch so desperately.

"Patience my love." She coos in your ear making you whine.

But she decided to be nice this time and gives in. Her right hand goes straight down to your already spread legs and her fingers start trailing up and down your soaked slit.

She bites her lips not expecting this much wetness already but then again it was you. And you'd get wet from the littlest of things.

You just loved Kate's touch so much.

And your dampened panties were proof of it.

"Katie please, I need you so badly." You whine and she hums.

You reached down and moved your panties to the side which made Kate chuckle before dipping her fingers in and instantly feeling your arousal soak her fingers.

You moaned and bucked your hips up but Late brought her left hand down and placed it against your stomach to somewhat stop your movements.

"Poor baby already so needy." She coos as the sounds of your wet cunt fill the room.

"Katie." You moaned and felt your eyes roll back as she teased your entrance with the tip of her finger.

"Shh it's okay baby, I've got you." She murmurs and slips two fingers in making you gasp.

Your left arm went to clasp hers which she was happy to see, you were just so cute wanting to continue touching her.

She slides her fingers in slowly then pulls them right back out making you whine until she brought said fingers up to your fingers which you subconsciously opened.

She slipped her fingers into your mouth and you closed your eyes, tasting yourself while you sucked on them. "Good girl." She purred making you moan against her fingers.

"Such a good girl for me." She whispers, giving you a kiss on the cheek before she took her fingers out and went straight back to work.

She slipped them in and this time didn't stop and started immediately fucking them into you. You clenched against them and you kept your eyes closed just for your immersion.

Her fingers always worked their perfect magic on you and you'd never grow tired of it. She always came up with new ways so you never grow "bored" but you never would anyway.

Her left hand moved up your body and came up to squeeze your left breast. You grabbed that arm and just held onto it, not wanting her to stop anything she was doing.

She started pinching your nipple as her pace went harder, faster. Your greedy cunt acting as if it hasn't been getting played with and just sucking up her fingers and enveloping them easily. "F-Fuck-" you whimpered and she kissed your cheek again.

"Feel good mama?" She asks and you nod feverishly.

"So tight too. I'll never grow tired of it." She purrs making you whine once again as she started fucking her harder.

By this point your cunt was pouring out a mix of wetness and creaminess juices, no doubt about to stain the bed.

But that was the least of either of your concerns as you tried spreading your legs out wider and it sure helped. Kate was now able to fuck you deeper but before she did she added a third finger.

At the new angle she was now hitting that sweet spot that had you passing out and seeing stars.

And you've yet to open your eyes.

"Oh fuck Kate— mmm god it feels so good—" you moan and grip her arm as you bring your right hand to play with your right breast for even more stimulation.

"Taking them so well pretty girl." She coos making you moan and you swore with just her praises alone you could come undone.

"Mmm Katie please- please-" you whined and she swore under her breath.

Her boxers were already a mess and your pretty moans were not helping her case. Not a complaint but god those moans drove her insane.

"So beautiful, fucking perfect." She murmurs and you quickly bring a hand down to rub your clit.

You rubbed fast circles on it and soon enough felt your orgasm approach. You figured out you always needed clit stimulation to cum until you met Kate and you suddenly didn't need it.

But sometimes it still felt good to cum that way anyway.

You let out a melody of whimpers and mewls as Kate's fingers were hitting your g spot harder now. You felt that all too familiar feeling in your stomach and your body began to shake.

"Cum for me baby, let go." She whispers and you do.

You let go and cry out as your orgasm hits you and leaving you a shaky, breathless mess. You move your hand away as Kate slowed down and left her fingers inside. You were breathing heavily and Kate brought her left hand to yours and held it softly.

"Did so good for me baby." She praises and kisses your cheek sweetly.

She slips her fingers out of your gently and you finally open your dazed eyes just in time to see her bring them up to her mouth. You look up at her in adoration and just sigh as your breathing calms itself down.

"Didn't even unwrap your present." You mutter and she giggles before wrapping both arms around you softly.

"Sorta counts."

"It does not."

"It should."

You then sit there in silence, enjoying each others company until Kate moves and positions you so your head is on the pillow. "I'll be right back." She whispers, giving your forehead a kiss before running off.

She came back after a few seconds and comes in with some plaid pj pants. "I got you red and green but because I know you love this green..." she says and takes the tag off before putting them on you.

"Perfect! Now I'll go wear my red ones and next week we flip flop." She says excitedly making you smile.

She was the sweetest and most thoughtful, caring person you've ever had the pleasure of meeting and you couldn't believe she was your girlfriend.

How you got so lucky was beyond you but you felt so grateful you found her because she was absolutely your soulmate.

The pea to your pod. The peanut butter to your jelly. The yin to your yang.

Your other half.

Because of her, you were a happier version of yourself and it was all because of how perfect of a girlfriend she was.

She finally came back only this time with her new pj pants on, a hat with the lower half of Santa, and two mugs.

Lucky came in behind her racing towards you, immediately jumping on the bed with another hat which he left on your lap. This one being a cute Christmas tree.

"See I have good taste." She says with a big grin.

"You have the best taste." You respond, grabbing the hat and putting it on.

"How do I look?" You ask as you grab the mug Late was handing to you.

"Absolutely perfect." She sighs and looks at you adoringly.

[my-writings-and-musings]

Earthspark Bumblebee x Medic!Reader

It's time for more soft Bumblebee x Reader content because the world always needs more. This one has Medic!Reader patching Bee up after the events of episode 18, so if you haven't seen that far ahead then spoilers!!

You'd never seen him remain in power down for so long, but considering the shape Bumblebee had been in when you first saw him, you didn't begrudge the Scout a well deserved rest. Even if it had come at the expense of your own…

Unable to sleep for many reasons, you checked your phone for the time, and couldn't stop your tired eyes from widening as you saw it was already close to five in the evening. Considering the Maltos had called you around six or so in the morning, that meant you'd been in the Dugout for over ten hours. It was impossible to believe so much had happened since that first slightly panicky call from Dot; just her synopsis of the series of events that had led to an unconscious, injured Bumblebee in the Dugout had taken the entirety of the half hour drive from your home to theirs. You'd pushed the terrifying details of underground bot fights to the side in favor of focusing on your patient, who only had you until Ratchet could return from his current mission across the globe and find a way to meet him somewhere clandestine for more secret repairs.

Though you were far from confident working on your own, you'd patched up the worst of the Scout's injuries to the very best of your abilities, and were at least certain it would cause him no further pain. Unfortunately you didn't have the tools to repair his armor completely, and GHOST would have had questions if you dropped by on your day off to grab the necessary supplies. Technically that meant you'd done everything you could for Bumblebee at the moment, but you still couldn't bring yourself to leave. A subtle twitch along his frame from what you assumed was a dream made you smile, affection and protective instinct rising up inside you.

In your defense, you hadn't seen Bee much since the events at the Racetrack. Between your job patching up the bots and the need to keep GHOST in the dark, you'd had little time to speak over covert channels and none to arrange a meeting of any kind. All you'd really been able to confirm was that he was alive, and that Optimus had a distant optic on him. This chance to sit with him on his berth and ensure he got the care he required was something you needed more than you cared to admit.

Not especially concerned about your own sleepiness, you pushed down a yawn and walked to the head of the berth where the Malto kids had lovingly piled a mountain of pillows beneath their beloved teacher's helm. You couldn't help but smile again at the utterly adorable sight and everything that had led up to it. Goodness, the kids had been so worried for his sake, asking repeatedly if there was anything they could do to help. It had taken a solid five minutes of assurances before they'd finally left you to your work, and that was only after you'd allowed them to ensure he was tucked in and comfortable. Looking over the mass mosaic of human sized blankets they'd stacked over the scout warmed your heart. 

A soft murmur in his sleep and a resulting twitch of his arm prompted you to check your work for the umpteenth time, lest Bumblebee wake to any pain or discomfort that you might have missed previously, and you kneeled by his side without a word for a better look. Using as little pressure as possible, you brushed your fingertips over the warped metal with a small cringe of sympathy as you traced the outline left by the massive tooth that had cracked right through his armor. It wasn't the only ugly injury he'd endured since your last meeting. You had noticed countless others at various stages of healing, telling you the Scout had been living a rough life since his recent fateful encounter with GHOST. The sympathy you felt was matched only by boundless hatred for your backwards employer.

Hearing a small hitch in his peaceful snores, you withdrew your hands in fear you'd caused unwanted pain, but a shift of his helm and a twitch of his doorwings signaled the mech was waking up regardless. Before you could move back to a more respectable distance, Bumblebee opened his optics with a bit of a start.

"Who's there?" he slurred in a rush, accustomed to waking up on alert but still far too bleary to be intimidating. You merely waved and remained where you were, giving his optics a moment to adjust to the dim lighting before they settled on you and lit up in recognition. 

"Hey, sleepyhead." you greeted gently, trying so hard to keep the overwhelming emotions out of your voice. As happy as you'd been to see him at all, being in his presence again for the first time in weeks had your heart absolutely aching. Goodness, it was impossible to put into words just how deeply you'd missed him. 

"Y/N?" he said with more clarity, the shock of seeing you bringing more of his processor online. Catching himself, he cleared his vents and backtracked into the far more formal register you two used when others might overhear, rolling onto his side and lifting his upper body to face you at a more respectable distance. "Sorry, I mean, uh, Doctor Y/N." 

You held up your hands to encourage him to relax, chuckling softly at the little song and dance the two of you maintained to keep your relationship secret. "You can drop that, it's just us."

Bumblebee sighed in a small measure of relief, doorwings relaxing on his back as he looked past you to the dim room beyond. "Where-?" he cut off as soon as his sharp optics traced the details of his private room, which had been left untouched after his sudden departure. A flurry of emotions passed over his face, confusion chief among them, and he furrowed his brows in concentration as he searched his still halfway offline processor for answers. Questions started spilling forth when he turned back to you. "How did I get back to the Dugout? Isn't GHOST keeping this place under wraps? What about the-?"

Talking through his thoughts allowed enough memories to resurface for Bee to connect the pieces, and before you could offer any kind of explanation or assurance his face lit up with alarm and he sat upright with enough force to send multiple blankets and pillows flying across the room.

"The kids!" he cried out in a near panic, looking ready to throw himself off the berth and charge out to face any potential threat to his family. "Are they okay? The last thing I remember is Mandroid-"

Medical training to keep a patient calm kicked into gear. You stood upright and held up your hands to get his attention as quickly as you could, trying not to slip on the tangled nest of blankets in your hurry.

"They're all grounded, but they're fine!" you explained as soon as his optics were on you, quieting your voice when the news allowed him to sigh and sit back in open relief. Considering how his night had gone, you didn't blame him for the panic. Between his injuries, Mandroid returning, the danger to the kids… It seemed best to give him a very simplified summary of what had happened after he'd passed out.

"They had to tell Dot and Alex about you so they could call me, but you only needed a patch job and a few infusions." you explained, leaving out the whirlwind of emotions you'd pushed through while providing his care. Seeing the bot you adored after weeks apart, only to have him presented unconscious and dangerously low on energon with fresh injuries to boot, had been a little much for your exhausted brain to endure at the crack of dawn. It hadn't helped that you'd been unable to get any sleep since thanks to your nagging concern, and you had to smother a yawn just to finish talking. "Thankfully I'm off duty for today, so I've been able to keep an eye on you."

Bumblebee went quiet for a moment to process, optics averting in thought before the information settled and he shook his helm with a somewhat heavy sigh. Returning his gaze to you, he replaced his thoughtful frown with a soft and somewhat bashful smile, emotions reserved as always.

"Sorry about your day off." he said quietly, somehow conveying his boundless gratitude for all you'd done in the form of a humble apology. 

You chuckled, but the words broke a dam within you, cracking right through your efforts to stay strong and allowing a flood of emotions to wash over your heart. The two of you had been close for a while, had been more than friends longer than anyone knew, but these past few weeks and especially the previous twelve hours had made it abundantly clear just how deeply you cared for this mech. Though you weren't quite ready for the "L" word yet, you weren't sure how you'd ever handle losing him, and even this brief scare had made it abundantly apparent the very idea terrified you. It was far too much to process on so little sleep.

Thankful for the dim lighting, you bit down on a quivering lip for as long as you could before the ache became too much to bear. Abandoning a playful quip in reply, you threw your arms about his neck for a hug, something you'd never before been brave enough to do. Bumblebee startled and made what sounded like a gasp of surprise, but made no effort to move away. The hum of his spark was tangible against your skin, and you welcomed it with a sound of pained relief. You allowed your voice to crack as you drank in every little bit of his presence. "I'm just glad you're okay."

Before embarrassment could make you doubt the gesture of affection, a sizable arm tenderly wrapped about your tiny form, his warm armor all but enshrouding you as he pulled you close. You allowed a few tears to splash against his yellow paint, sighing as the world finally seemed to make sense for the first time in weeks. It wasn't clear how long the two of you stayed like that before you rediscovered your voice. "It's really good to see you again, Bee. I missed you."

"I missed you too." he replied softly, thumb stroking comfortingly up and down your back as he took his time letting you go. When he finally did so it was only partly, his grip loosening but his hand staying on your back as he leaned away to look at you while he spoke. Regret was heavy in every syllable. "I would have tried to send more messages, or visit, but-"

"I know, Optimus has kept me in the loop." you said, interrupting only to prevent him from blaming himself further. You allowed your hands to linger on his shoulders, the divot of a somewhat fresh scar bumping against your fingers as you did so, bringing back a host of worries that had followed you for weeks. "I've been so worried they'd hurt you, or catch you, or-"

It was his turn to interrupt out of concern. "Hey, I'm fine now, right?" he said playfully, slipping a hand beneath your chin. The touch warmed your heart, especially as he guided you to look up at him with the gentlest lift of his digits. His face softened in the way it often did when he opened up, optics brightening and flicking away as the faintest hint of a pink flush bloomed across his cheeks. "Thanks to you, anyway."

The praise hit its mark, and you dropped your gaze to hide a reciprocal blush, unsure how the two of you had gotten so soft for one another. Perhaps the absence had made all your tiptoeing around seem foolish now that the stakes were clarified. If the two of you could lose each other any day, what good did it do to hide and delay?

In addition to melting your heart, his words pinged a medical protocol in the back of your mind, and your concern couldn't help but gently steer the conversation to his care. A careful hand on his guided the attention there first. "You'll still need some reconstruction, I'm not big or strong enough to handle that without my tools." you explained, being a bit more openly tender than usual as you traced your fingers over the welds you'd applied to clean up the mangled armor and mesh. Bumblebee looked ready to reply with a compliment to counteract your matter of fact assessment, but you cut him off, the strain of so much emotional turmoil on just a few hours of sleep making you quite weary. It took everything not to yawn as you spoke. "You should also keep resting up, I can tell you've been pushing it lately."

Bumblebee didn't argue, but you knew from experience he would catch that you were tired, and as soon as he opened his mouth you were proven correct. "Maybe, but I bet you could use some sleep too." 

"I'm fine. I'll sleep later." you assured with a wave of your hand, hoping to get him back in power down before it became too difficult to hide the full extent of your exhaustion. You knew it was futile now that Bee had figured you out, but you still had to try. It was simply impossible for you to just admit you had needs without being pushed.

"If I need rest, so do you." Bumblebee countered as expected, and for once his gentle concern cut right through your walls. Before you could nod and suggest grabbing some of the many pillows and blankets to construct yourself a makeshift bed in the corner, the Scout cleared his vents and made a small space beside himself, one perfectly sized for you. His voice faltered through an adorable attempt to sound smooth. "There's… plenty of room on this berth."

It was impossible to deny how perfectly you'd fit in the space between his arm and his chest, or how warm and safe you'd feel getting some much needed sleep beside his spark, but before you could reply Bumblebee finally noticed the ridiculous abundance of blankets and pillows that had been layered around him. "There's also plenty of… pillows and blankets too… why… why are there so many-?"

You laughed before you could stop yourself, a bit too loopy from a lack of sleep to explain how his students had gone to great efforts to ensure he was comfortable. "Very long story." 

"Sounds like something for after we wake up." he said with a soft chuckle, able to hazard a guess as to how he'd ended up cocooned. Nodding in agreement, you allowed yourself to yawn and give your eyes a sleepy rub, suddenly unable to resist curling up and letting your body get the rest it needed. It hardly mattered that your sleep schedule would be a mess when this was done. 

Bumblebee shifted backwards to make more room, awkwardness returning as he tried to ensure you had a comfortable spot with plenty of space. "Here, let me uh… oh!"

Too tired to feel any kind of embarrassment, you plopped down just beside his chassis, facing his front and resting your head on his shoulder. It was perhaps the closest the two of you had ever been, and nothing had ever felt more right. The hum of his spark quickened from the contact, but from the way he curled protectively around your smaller form you knew it was far from unwelcome. Still, you looked up to him for explicit confirmation before getting settled. "This okay?"

"Yeah, definitely." he replied easily, helpfully offering all the blankets and pillows you needed before getting comfortable at your side. You didn't fail to notice how he adjusted your bedding after you'd settled into the crook of his arm, his digits lingering for the shortest fraction of a second on your arms before he laid his helm back down with a whisper. "Goodnight, Y/N."

"Goodnight, Bee." you replied just before sleep claimed you, your last sensation the warmth of his frame curled lovingly around your own. 

[sweetshelluvaau]

Not necessary a spoiler being we see Charlie all over the marketing and official clips but something about her feels like they made her more...childish I guess is the word?

Yeah she was optimistic and a bit naïve in the pilot but she wasn't stupid. She knew Sinners in Hell did some horrendous shit and wasn't taken back from it, but still liked to believe that 'there's a rainbow' in everyone which is a nice thing to believe within reason. Some people are just bad people that won't change and some people? They're completely irredeemable.

She didn't come across as sheltered neither, she just wanted to find a better way to deal with the overpopulation problem which also plays in her willingness to see the good in people that she thinks is worth saving.

In the marketing for the show however, she acts surprised that cannibals' are eating other people or acts like mass murders or rapist aren't a thing like girl? You live here? Why are you surprised by this? Unless Luci locked you in a cage your whole life, you would know this, right?

She also was never this much of a push over if I recall. She fought and called Killjoy a bitch on live television! She may be naïve but she didn't completely roll over and take people's shit neither.

The interesting thing about Charlie in the pilot is that she knew why people are sent down to Hell but she refused to believe that they couldn't change. And if we put the whole 'overpopulation' plot point into play: Even though there are sinners that damn right deserve to be sent down there, most humans are complex beings that sometimes do the things they do not because they necessary want to, but they feel it may be the only choice they have, or perhaps they did try to be the best person they could have been but life does throw curveballs at you and sometimes things don't end up the way you wish they could. If one little 'sinful' mistake can cause you to be sent to the place where you burn for all entirety, what does that say about how Heaven views good and bad or right and wrong?

(yeah I know I mentioned the whole 'humans are complex' thing so many times on this blog but it's neither the less true)

The idea of Charlie trying to prove that people aren't prefect and flawed to those in Heaven and shaking the very foundation on how the system works is such an interesting premise and is ripe for exploration about humanity and morality in general.

Grated the full season hasn't been released yet so all we know Charlie could grow and change as the story goes on but idk, seeing some of the clips so far makes me think otherwise.

[stillwithmeisonlyyou]

Got this idea from @caloak888

My fav boygenius lyrics (solo careers- also some phoebe covers included) in no particular order:

"I'm 27 and I don't know who I am but I know what I want"

"I can't love you how you want me to"

"Here's the best part distilled for you"

"I'll bite the hand that feeds/ needs me"

"Know it's for the better" (obviously)

"and when broken bodies are washed to shore, who am I to ask for more?"

"If I breathe you will it kill me? Will you have me or watch me fall? If I fix you will you hate me? Would you fuck this and let us fall? "

"anyway, don't be a stranger"

"yes you're evil but you're not that bad,/ you put out your palm more than the back of your hand"

I know claw machine is a sloppy jane song and phoebe is featured in it but that song made me question my existence for a month so it's too good not to put on here :

"I paint my ceiling black so I don't notice when my eyes are open"

"I think I was born bored/ I think I was born blue/ I think I was born wanting more/ I think I was born already missing you"

"But my heart is like a claw machine/ Its only function is to reach/ It can't hold on to anything/ No I can't hold on to anything"

"You know it's a mistake when it's me who was making it/ It's always the wrong thing when it's me who's saying it"

"Watch the world from the sidelines/ Had nothing to prove/ Till you came into my life/ Gave me something to lose/ Now I know what it feels like to wanna go outside/ Like the shape of my outline"

"And I used to think you could hear the ocean in a seashell, what a childish thing"

"and it feels good to be known so well/ I can't hide from you like I hide from myself/ I remember who I am when I'm with you/ your love is tough, your love is tried and true blue"

"the harder I swim the faster I sink" (classic I know)

"But I shouldn't have built a house in the middle of your chest/ plywood boards joined at your breast/ splinter in my arm where you rest your head"

"I don't wanna be that man on the train/ On a grey commute, imagining fame/ Sweet relief, I will never be complete/ I will never be complete, I'll never know everything"

"Everybody else, everybody else looks like they've figured it out"

"I'm just as good as anybody, I'm just as bad as anybody"

the entirety of stay down that song is just too good

"you thought I'd never leave and I let you believe you were right"

"I don't wanna die, that's a lie"

"I wanna be emaciated/ I wanna hear one song without thinking of you"

"I wanna be happy/ I'm ready/ To walk into my room without looking for you/ I'll go up to the top of our building/ And remember my dog when I see the full moon/I can't feel it yet/ But I am waiting all morning..."

See how it comes back full circle

" If nothing can be known then stupidity is holy / if the void becomes a bore, we'll treat ourselves to some self belief"

"I wish that I drank because of you and not only because of me/ Then I could blame something painful enough not to make me look any more weak"

"I'd say "Give me no sympathy" it's the mercy I can't take"

"Tell me what snuffed out the wick in your eye"

The outro of I know the end you know what im talking about

"I want to believe/ instead I look at the sky and I feel nothing/ you know I hate to be alone/ I want to belong"

"You pulled a moth out from the grill of your truck saying "It's a shame"/ How come it's so much easier with anything less than human?/ Letting yourself be tender/ Well, you couldn't make me do it"

"Cause if I didn't have a mean bone in my body/ I'd find some other way to cause you pain/ I won't bother telling you I'm sorry/ For something that I'm gonna do again"

"Do I get callous or do I stay tender?"

"you want love/ This is as close as you're gonna get/ Not enough/ Just as much as you think you can live with/ Hurt 'til it's all gone, baby/ It's all gone, baby"

The gold- I know it's technically not phoebe but can't really exclude that

"I'm gnashing my teeth like a child of Cain/ If this is a prison, I'm willing to buy my own chain"

"I feel crazy in ways I never say/ Will you still love me if it turns out I'm insane?/ I know what you'll say/ But it helps to hear you say it, anyway"

"If you rewrite your life, may I still play a part/ In the next one, will you find me?/ I'll be the boy with the pink carnation pinned to my lapel who looks like hell and asks for help/ And if you do, I'll know it's you"

"If you cut a whole into my skull,do you hate what you see? Like I do"

Like there are so many more but if this didn't convince you to listen to my babies then I don't know what will